ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - August 07 2019

Episode Date: August 7, 2019

Am I A Bad Person, Community Notices and what did you do in the company car?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music lives here. Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Thanks, Anya. Welcome to the show, Fletch Warner Megan. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Why are you so happy? I don't know, I was just chuckling at you. Thanks. My button's on. Yeah, my microphone's on. It's Wednesday. Megan's hungry. She won't eat food. I know. I'm just suddenly really hungry this morning. I don't usually eat till lunchtime.

I don't know how you do that. You're crazy. My tummies are really going for it. Might I recommend a savoury scone? Yum. Oh, yum. It's a nice little placeholder. No, I don't have one, but I know where you can get one. And then it's a nice little placeholder sometimes for a late breakfast.

Right. Savory scone, lots of butter. Good for you. I'm pretty sure it's keto and everything. Vegetarian, keto. So leaf. Paleo. All right, you lot, listen up.

It's story time. Story time, three news headlines for three interesting, quirky, odd, unusual news stories that I've found. Vaughan and Megan, deliberate. Pick one of the following three only. Headline one, man recycles life savings. Headline two, tip off, nets man $24,000. And headline three, don't hotcakes and drive

Those are your headlines Hotcakes and drive Where did I see that? They were basically Eating hotcakes right And had a crash Was that in New Zealand? Was it?

I believe it did Southland, Dunedin. I don't know if they crashed. I've only read the first paragraph. But yeah, that was a New Zealand-based story. I'll eat a tank salad and drive. Oh, no. I'll never eat a salad.

Burgers, chips, nuggets. That's more of your driving, eating. Yeah, fair. I mean, you shouldn't But you do Is there a law against it? I think Driving and eating Yeah I think there is

Is there? Is there? Wasn't it distracted driving? Are you legally allowed to eat and drive in New Zealand? It is not currently illegal to eat or drink behind the wheel in New Zealand. Many communities take the opportunity. This is 10 New Zealand laws you may not know from car take back blog. Oh, so a legitimate legal source.

Yeah. They have a late breakfast or coffee on the go. Despite being legal in the eyes of the law right now, snacking or drinking behind the wheel can still land you in trouble. So you're having a salad, but I'd be much safer texting and driving than I would be eating a salad and driving. But then you're not paying the salad attention, are you? No.

Or the nugget or the burger attention, whereas a phone... I just stab with the fork and then just push it in my mouth, but I can keep my eyes on the road. I'm not, like, fussy about what's on the fork. I'm going to get it all in the end. And what, you put the salad between your legs or something?

Yeah. Right. Take a little table. That would be handy. Attaches to your steering wheel. Yes. But then you turn the corner and you have a little horse on the table. Have a little salt and pepper shaker.

You put a napkin. It would be more like you put a bracket over your shoulder and it sits on your chest. Oh, yeah, that would be a great idea, yeah. Is that a gyroscope or something on the steering wheel? Oh, yeah, like'd be a great idea. Is it a gyroscope or something on the steering wheel? Oh yeah, like a steering wheel balances itself. So it's always level. So it would have a big

bubble of air under the flat thing. Did we just invent something? So even if your car flips down a cliff, your salad table would be level. Yeah,

they'd be like, I don't know what happened chief, but the car flipped down the cliff 80 times so the salad didn't spill a leaf.

I think it's something to do with this new gyroscope table he's got attached to his wheel. It's a brilliant invention. He's dead, I say we take it and patent it. Let's steal his invention. Yes. Okay. Well, so we've done that story, haven't we? So do you want one or two?

Man recycles life savings is one or two. Tip off Nets man $24,000. Ooh, both money related. because can you still remember when you used to be able to, in New Zealand,

like tell the IRD that somebody was doing cashy jobs and then you'd get like a little, would ya? I don't know. A little tip line.

Well, they've got the Crime Stoppers. Do they pay you for Crime Stoppers tip offs? no, I think you're just

doing that because you want less crime on your community. Oh, right. Right, okay. So for feel good. All right, which story do we want?

The tip-off. The tip-off. All right, okay. We go to the UK now where a guy has been literally shafted. He has been awarded $24,000

after going into a hospital for a bladder procedure and coming out circumcised. That's why I saw this. Oh, tip off. Oh. That tip off his penis. That was in the headline. Yes.

I saw this. Accidentally comes out. He's like, hey. It was a real surprise for 70-year-old man Terry Brazier. 70! Who's gone 70 years of the fourie and now doesn't have one. Wow. Just like that.

He was supposed to get a cystoscopy. Cystoposky? Cystoposky? Yeah, something like that. That's where Botox is injected into the bladder wall to help control incontinence and keeps your skin looking so lovely. Go Botox.

And he was too busy chatting to staff to realise he was instead receiving the personal procedure. I mean, I don't know. So he didn't even get the... Someone's touching your penis. Don't think too much about it. No, but he would have had local, right? You wouldn't be looking.

Yeah. If they're going into the bladder, that means they're going up there. He was awarded more than $24,000 in compensation for the screw-up that's being blamed on staff mixing up their notes. And they're genuinely, deeply sorry. They're going to be nice to look down at the age of 74 and see a different penis after all those years. No, they've taken some of it away.

It would have been wrinkly, wouldn't it? Yeah, probably like just a nip-tuck on the old... Oh, yeah, probably. It's just a nip-tuck, yeah. A nip-tuck on the old fella. Yeah, right. I hope they'd take a couple of inches off the saggy scrote while they're there, but beggars can't be treated.

At least they could do. Yeah, or at least give it some Botox. I think it's 70 you've given up, haven't you? No. Oh, 70 is the new thing. Not if he's in a home. I'm not saying that. Oh, yeah, yeah, that's true. They're hives of up, haven't you? No. God, 70 is the new thing. Not if he's in a home. Oh, yeah, that's true. They're hives of activity, aren't they?

Yeah. It's Tinder, but you don't have to leave. With less swiping. At all. An interesting story. The Defence Force apparently turned down an applicant, an applicant called Jack, due to the fact that he was a vegan. Interesting.

Now, I just was like, huh. But then I thought about it and I was like, it would be really hard to cater to a vegan if you were on a Defence Force mission. Like, the Defence Force is the Air Force, the Navy and the Army. But if you were deployed, surely it's just like, I mean, I don't know. I've never been deployed.

Which would come as a major surprise because you look at me and you immediately think there's a man. There's a man who knows discipline. Yeah, there's a man who doesn't mind taking orders being screamed at. There's a man who would put a gun in his hand and he'd defend this fine country of ours from foreign... No, I've seen you play Fortnite. Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew.

Ah! Behind the bush. I don't know if you're allowed to just hide behind a bush for the entire war, Vaughn. We'll see. At the end of the war, we'll see. So they've said, no, you're a vegan. You're not allowed in the armed forces.

They said that they couldn't guarantee during deployment into austere environments that they would have access to catering specific to his dietary requirements. Right. They can't guarantee adequate food and training on deployments. Because I originally thought it was something to do with his stamina. No, no, the dude. Chris Hemsworth is a vegan. originally thought it was something to do with his stamina. No, I know the dude. Chris Hemsworth is a vegan.

I thought it was Liam Hemsworth. No, I think that's a boy. It's Hemsworth. Yeah. Oh, God, a bad old man Hemsworth just wants to chuck a snag on the barbie when the boys come home. And roll around those bloody crayons. Yeah, they could put some sort of cylindrical object on the barbecue.

It will be made out of vegetables. You know I love you, boys. I always will. But jeez, I wish you'd just have a bloody pork sausage. Such an old mate thing to say, isn't it? But I mean, I'm only basing my knowledge on movies and stuff. And when they're deployed, they get these little packets of processed food. They get rations.

Rations and stuff, don't they? Yeah. So, I mean, don't they? Yeah. So, I mean, maybe it would be a bit hard to take carrot sticks and a celery dip. It wouldn't last. It wouldn't last, yeah. Even food outside of, yeah, I mean, carrot. But I would have thought they would have been stoked for anyone to join. Well, yeah, but I mean, if they don't have the means to feed them, then.

Yeah. But surely they're going to do it. He's been a self-lifeguard. He's been a volunteer firefighter. So there's no worry about his physique. Yeah, right. But surely this has happened before. Yeah. He's been a current lifeguard. He's been a volunteer firefighter. So there's no worry about his physique. Yeah, right. But surely this has happened before. Yeah.

There's been people that have needed dietary requirements. I kind of get it though, because they obviously have like a budget for things and they need to make bulk food for everyone. They just like chuck on a big spag bol, like mum. Yeah. Some mincey treat. Yeah. She's like, I can't be bothered. I'm just going to make a big spag bol, like mum. Yeah. Just. Yeah. Some mincey treat.

Yeah. She's just like, I can't be bothered. I'm just going to make a big spag bol. Yeah. That's like, I'd imagine what the army's pretty much like. Yeah. That's interesting though. Oh, I was going to say, if he was in the Navy, he could just catch his own.

But vegans don't eat fish. No. They don't eat any animal product or byproduct, right? Seaweed. But that takes a lot or byproduct, right? Seaweed. But that takes a lot of processing, right? Who's drawing their seaweed out on the deck again? Over the cannon. Just to make some sushi. Some vegetable sushi.

That would be pretty good camouflage. Like if you covered your naval destroyer in seaweed. Seaweed, yeah. You could eat it But then you'd also just look like a seaweed A giant floating seaweed A giant floating seaweed Right

Well I don't know all of the ways seaweed can come So that's got to be one of them I assume ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast A guy has had a payout He's had a $3,800 payout. $3,800? Yeah.

Doesn't seem like a massive payout in like an employment dispute. Yeah. It's an employment dispute. It is. You know, there are always like tens of thousands of dollars. Yeah, but usually the employee's been working there for a bit. This guy had been working at his job for eight hours. And he got fired.

He got fired. Nice. So he was fired after two trial half days. Have you ever wanted to fire someone at your cafe after eight hours? No. On the first day? No. No.

Really? She's not going to say yes because they haven't had that many employees. No. Oh, yeah. It would be really obvious to work out who it was. I definitely haven't. No, but he was doing trial, trial, half days. And so he, yeah, spent a total of eight hours and his boss, his employer,

claimed that he just spent the whole time on his phone and posed for selfies on his forklift. Yes. This would be me. You give me a forklift on a trial day. I've never been on a forklift. Yes. This would be me. You give me a forklift on a trial day. I've never been on a forklift before. I'm taking photos and videos and selfies. Yeah. Me too.

Without a doubt. Me too. It's like, hey, here's me. Look, I'm putting the forks up. Oh, here's me reversing. I would definitely take a selfie on a forklift. He must have driven a forklift because you have to have a forklift license

to drive a forklift. That's true. Do forklift because you have to have a forklift license to drive a forklift. That's true. Do ya? Well, legally, yeah. Yeah, right. Okay. Like if you do damage to whatever, to like tens of thousands of dollars worth of stock, they won't pay the insurance.

Right. So the Employment Relations Authority said that, well, they gave him $3,800 because they said technically he was employed by them. So his dismissal wasn't following the proper procedures. Written warning for selfies on the forklift. Second written warning. Does that count if it's a trial period? If you're like agreeing that it's a trial,

like you're not technically hired yet. But they're saying he was. But then you wouldn't say like, get off that bugger off and don't come back. Which you'd be like, hey, well, I'll let you know if I want to see you on Monday. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

And then you'd text on Sunday and say, oh, look, there's just, it's not a busy week. It's not working out. Yeah. Yeah. And then just go and check his Instagram and say that there's like five selfies on his forklift. Or he's gone somewhere else. He's just excited, you know. Gone somewhere else with a forklift.

Yeah. In the forklift. Yeah.'s gone somewhere else. He's just excited, you know? Gone somewhere else with a forklift. Yeah. In the forklift. Yeah. But that sounds like the only reason he was fired. Like, it wasn't like he dropped a whole bunch of stock or anything like that. Yeah, just selfies. Well, he might have just been useless.

He might have actually been doing the selfies when he should have been moving and stacking. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six. Hello, welcome to the Top Six. There's a cute little story. Fletch pointed me towards the story of a rural proposal. An engagement ring put onto a cow's teat.

So that when milking got going, I don't even know exactly how it would have gone because you're running a real risk of the ring falling off into the poo or just chucking the cups on and it sucks the ring off into the filter.

But anyway, it's Pilate Beautiful. This is as romantic as it gets on the farm, isn't it? That is, that is rural romance at its bloody finest.

She turns around, she's like, jeez, you'll never guess what I found, Trev. And she turns around and he's like, he's on one knee. guess what I found, Trev. And she turns around and he's like. He's on one knee. Yeah, I'm not going to be down here for long, Sheila,

but bloody hell. Do you want to do me the honour of being my bloody wife? Did this happen in New Zealand? Or was it overseas? Well, it's rural. It's about as New Zealand as it gets. Yeah. So the top six other ideas for rural proposals.

Because I know it's busy on the farm. Yeah. It's actually a bloody crazy time of the year to propose. You've got carving, lambing. All your major birthing events are happening at this time of year. Just wait till it cools off in the summer months. Or maybe even in the dry season next, you know, April, May. Okay.

You've got a bit of time off. Sometimes love can't wait for it. No, you're right. You know, just can't. You're absolutely right. The top six rural proposal ideas, number six. Put the ring on the tail of a widow whammy. Oh, that's pretty cute.

So they... And then you try and chase it and it's like bouncing around. Yeah, it's like... Shaking its little tail and then you've got to feed it because it's the orphan lamb and the little wiggle of the tail, the little glint of light catches your eye. What have we got here? Oh, bloody hell.

Three of you shouldn't have. Oh, I love you. You know that? I'm not going to say it too many times, but I bloody love you. Number five on the list of the top six rural proposal ideas. Do that thing farmers do where they arrange tyres from the silage stack into words on the side of a hill beside the road. They always write stuff like, go the All Blacks.

Still like that with all the tyres on a big side of the hill, but you could write up there, take the day. Yeah. Will you marry me, Sharon? I thought it was Sheila. Well, no, this is a different firm. Oh, okay. A different farmer. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All the farmers are called Shane and Sharon. Yeah. Oh, okay. A different farmer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All the farmers are called Trip. Shane and Sharon. Yeah. Oh, God. Written in the stars. Double A, double Sh. Yeah. Shane and Sharon. Will you marry me, Sharon?

Of course I will, you big bloody goof. Get out of here. Number four on the list of the top six rural proposal ideas. Bugger the engagement ring. Get her an engagement quad bike. Get some diamante decorations on that to really seal the deal, but a sparkle, but practical. Yeah.

Practical and completely tax deductible. Brilliant. You can't write the engagement ring off as a farm expense, but you can write an engagement quad bike off as a farm expense. Good call. number three on the list of the top six rural proposal ideas share the proposal into the side of a sheep now that's going to be you'd probably want to share the sheep yeah and then just get a finer finer shaver and and do the uh intricate artwork on your calmest sheep yeah you wouldn't want to

go for a bit of a loose cannon. Yeah. It'd be hard to get good riding when it's bucking around down there. So just get a nice calm sheep and carve, not carve into the side of the sheep, shave into the side. That'll get the bloody greenies gone. Number two on the list of the top six ideas for a rural proposal. Get her a new pair of red bands.

Oh, yeah, nice. And drop the ring in it. Oh, yeah. She'll put on her boots. She'll be like, oh, I've got a bloody stone in my boot. Turn it upside down and whack the boot. The engagement ring will fall out. She'll turn around.

You'll be in your best swanny down on one knee. I bloody love you, Sharon. I love you too, Trev. This is the other farming couple down the road because they're Sharon and Shane. you too Trev This is the other farming couple down the road Because there's Sharon and Shane Trev and somebody else And Trev and There's a lot of Trevs on the road

Best swanny on the knee Oh you haven't I do I bloody love you Love you love you Sharon Oh Trev Of course I will And number one on the list of the top six rural proposal ideas, mowing the, will you marry me into the hay paddock?

Oh, yeah. That would take some artistic flair. Maybe some GPS coordinates too. Yeah, that's not a bad idea. Or, you know, send the drone up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Send the drone up and then, you know, watch. Watch out for the trough though while you're driving around.

Keep your eye on the paddock while you're driving around though because it's long grass so the trough might be slightly obscured. You don't want to hit the trough, though, while you're driving around. Keep your eye on the paddock while you're driving around, though, because it's long grass, so the trough might be slightly obscured. You don't want to hit the trough with your bloody new tractor. That'd be bloody an absolute rigmarole. And then the lads down the road would hear about it. God, you'd be the laughingstock. Like that time you accidentally bought a Mahindra. You're not going to be carried away at the field days,

but at least you didn't buy a Great Wall. God, Great Wall, bloody youths. Am I right? Buy a bloody great wall, you get stuck in the back paddock the minute there's a bloody couple of mils of rain. Two-wheel drive. It's this farmer banter, is it? Bloody Korean bill.

Yeah, right. Show me some assembled nonsense. Stick to what you know. It's a Toyota Hilux. Go hard. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. If you go to the gym or actually do any exercise that doesn't have to be at the gym,

are you willing to acknowledge that you flatulate a little bit more? Oh, yeah, definitely. Oh, gym fardies? Yep. But if you're like on a treadmill or something, you can be like. Just time it with your steps. Let it a bit out, yeah. But you've got headphones in.

You don't need to take your headphones out. Do you know the worst is when you're like, I'm just going to let a cheeky one out. And you've got your headphones in. And you just assume everyone does. And then you let one go. And you're like, okay, that would have been loud. And then you turn to the person next to you. And they're not wearing headphones.

And they're looking at you or something. Yeah. Hi. Hi. Hi. Okay, so you're agreeing that when you're doing exercise or when you're at the gym or something, a little bit more farty. Yeah, yeah.

Well, I've actually found out why that is. So apparently it's physics. Any exercise that involves you bending, twisting, jumping, any kind of movement can literally just push out what is already inside of you. So Pilates, cycling, yoga, and bodyweight workouts are the worst. That was that time when we went to Pilates,

whatever it's called, Producer Caitlin, and we got told off for talking. The only one time I've done, that was Pilates, eh? What was it called? No, it was yoga. It was actual yoga. Oh, yeah, okay. And I felt like I needed to fart the whole time.

Oh, my God. It was so quiet. They don't play music. Like, they don't play some amp-dump, pump-dump music. No, because you're relaxing. So there was nowhere for me to do a cheeky fart. You are so embarrassing, and that's why you've never come back to yoga with me. I can't imagine you're relaxing. So there was nowhere for me to do a cheeky fart. You are so embarrassing, and that's why you've never come back to yoga with me.

I can't imagine you doing yoga. It's very calming. Yeah, I know. I got so bored. So why don't you do those float tanks? What do you do for an hour and a half? Just sleep. Pretty much.

Sounds horrible. Just lie there. Sounds horrible. So strength athletes apparently have something called the Valsava Maneuver, which is a way of breathing to help them lift weights. Yeah. But if the air isn't fully exhaled through the mouth,

it comes out the other end. Yeah. I always thought it was because, you know, when you're like drinking water at the gym, you're like, oh, oh, oh. You're sucking a whole lot of water, air into the whole system. Yeah. And apparently gas-producing workouts are aerobic.

So anything aerobic, you are actually producing more. And then because you're jumping around, it's literally just being pushed. You don't want to be the first person to open up the door into a pump class after an hour. Let's put it that way. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. The Victorian police, you know, Melbourne, Australia. I thought you meant the time. Blue Heelers.

No, I thought you meant the time period. Oh, Victorian police. What you got to get out of there? I've not. They have posted something on Facebook, which has got people talking. And it turns out that a lot of us could be breaking the law because I'm assuming that the law is very similar here in New Zealand.

They posted a poll on their Victoria Facebook police page saying when using a fast food outlet's drive-thru service, can I use my phone to pay? So for example, Apple Pay, PayWave, Google Pay, whatever. Stay tuned for the answer so you could vote yes or no.

65% of people said yes, you can use your phone to pay. Yeah, because you're stationary. You're in the drive-thru. Hold your horses.

Hold your horses, Morgan. Because, as they explained later, if you intend to pay with your mobile phone in a drive-thru, you are expected to apply the handbrake, switch the engine off, and then access your mobile phone

to pay for your fast food takeaways at the drive-thru. Stop. And if you don't, you could be considered driving and using your phone. And in Victoria, that's like a fine of $400 or something dollars and $484 and four demerit points. Wow. That's nuts, isn't it? And I'm guessing that would be the same here.

Like you can't even be at the traffic lights and use your phone, right? No. Even though you're stationary. But then in that regard, could you turn your vehicle off at the traffic lights, apply the handbrake, then check your phone? Or is that different because that's on a road? What if you've got one of those cars that turns itself off to save petrol,

like Megan's car? The Jeep does that. But is that actually off? Yeah. Or is that in a standby state? No. Oh, because if you accelerate, it automatically goes on. If you accelerate, it turns on.

So technically your car's not off. The engine's idle. No, the engine's off. Oh, okay. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Well, I don't know if we have any police listening.

But what's the difference? Or anybody legally that's in the know. What's the difference between like going into your bag and getting out your EFTPOS card or whatever and then swipe? Like you're just as distracted

as you would be getting out your mobile phone. Yeah, you're probably right. Your mobile phone's probably in the holder. Yeah. Or on your lap

because you've been using it. Yeah, pick it up. Thumb ID. They're not going to sit in drive-thrus hanging people. You don't know. But it's good to know that they could do this

because you'd like to think that... Why is it good that they could do this? It's good to know that... It's good to know that they could do this. That they could do this because then you can, I guess, not do it. If you see one in the drive-thru, if you see a po-po in the drive-thru...

Turn your car off. Turn your car off. Apply the handbrake. And then pin. Yeah. Just if they're feeling like... And then pick. Yeah. Right. Just if they're feeling like. And that's the thing.

They're not going to have a checkpoint at a drive-thru, are they? If anything, if you see them in the drive-thru, they're probably doing what you're doing and just getting chips. Yeah. Yeah. They had a hankering for some nuggies. For some nuggies. Exactly.

They caught a criminal and they've got a new rule. They're like, we catch a criminal, we get nuggies. Yeah. And then that makes them really want to catch criminals because they really we get nuggies. Yeah. And then that makes them really want to catch criminals because they really want those nuggies. Yeah.

Oh, I totally get that. It's a reward system. Yeah. For every 10 criminals, the boss gives them a nuggy voucher. Fletchborn and Megan's Community Notices.

Hello and welcome to Community Notices, a segment of the show where we have a look at what's happening on local Facebook pages around this beautiful country of ours. Often posts that make us chuckle. Excuse me. Oh, she's breathing the coffee. Saying thank you to Anya. Thank you.

Maybe this whole thing could have waited till after Community Notices. I whispered it off, Mike. Next time, don't bring their food in until after, please. I'm bringing them whenever you like. I just want good help these days. What's happening now? Whose headphones are squeaking? Why am I wearing a beanie

and it doesn't have a seal around your ear? Not happening now. This is so noise. Oh. I thought we had to have noise. I thought it would search. I thought the microphone would search for the noise. And it would find a frequency.

And then it would feedback. Okay. Let's start on the MacArthur Notice Board. Caitlin writes. Caitlin. MacArthur. This is in Australia. This came in from one of our Australian listeners.

I know we're going international. Okay. With community notices. The international community. Caitlin wrote on the MacArthur. This is in Australia. This can't be from one of our Australian listeners. I know we're going international with community notices. The international community. Caitlin wrote on the MacArthur notice board, can anyone drop a tambourine off at my house? I used to have a tambourine. Why? I read one. Why?

Because my friend could play like drums, bass and lead guitar and I was percussion. Oh, Megan, I'm sorry to break that to you, but that's a shit one. I had egg shakers and a tambourine because it's all I was percussion. I had egg shakers. I'm sorry to break that to you, but that's a shit one. I had egg shakers and a tambourine because it's all I could do. That's like a participation instrument. It's percussion. My problem with egg shakers is I always

and the tambourine, I always whack them so hard because I was like, I can't hear the egg shaker over the other instruments. My egg shakers were from like the rock shop. They were like, they were black and they were proper. Wonder where they are. You got egg shakers from the rock shop. They were like, they were black and they were proper. I wonder where they are. You got egg shakers

from the rock shop. I told you I was percussion. My mum would have been like, put some rocks in an old peanut butter jar and then make music with your pals. I would have had a Marmite jar

with some gravel in it from the road. Yeah, and a glass one too so you can't shake it too hard or you'll cut yourself. But no, there just, no further explanation apart from she just wants a tambourine. Okay.

Well, maybe she's percussion. And her friend's bad. No one's choosing to be percussion. No, it's just what you get assigned when you don't. Yeah, when you're not very good at instruments. When you can't read music. Yeah. Couldn't do that on the drums. Couldn't do that on the drums.

I could do that on the drums. Tambourine. I could do the main, like, snare and hi-hat, but you can never incorporate the bass because then you have to get arms and feet working together. Oh, yeah. All your limbs. All your limbs have to...

It's impossible. Come together. Let's pop back over to limbs. All your limbs have to. It's impossible. Come together. Let's pop back over to New Zealand, the East Auckland Grapevine. Madeline posts on the East Auckland Grapevine, urgent help needed. Oh, no. I'm at the AMI netball courts and I've just picked up an injured pukakoi. Oh, no. I was on the road.

I can't just leave this injured Pukakohe here. Please help me. Where do I take injured Pukakohe? Three times. Three times there. I'm imagining that would be a predictive text situation, but probably like, you know, when you don't know how to spell a word

and you just have a shot and predictive text is like, I gotcha. You're like, well, you don't, but thanks. Yeah. Maybe they were just like, that looks a bit like Predictive Tex is like, I gotcha. Oh, yeah. Well, you don't, but thanks. Yeah. Maybe they were just like, that looks a bit like poo kicker. Well, it does actually look like poo kicker with an e on the end. Close enough. Poo kicker.

But, you know, close enough. And they gave it a shot. Yeah. Yeah. In fact, the pukako probably got a shot as well. So while we're talking about animals, we're on a little bit of a roll now. Let's pop down to Hornswell where Bailey has said, has anyone misplaced a dog down Checketts Ave?

He's in good hands. And look at this Samoyed here with sunglasses on. Oh, buddy. Yeah, that turned up and they were like, hey, you look real cool when we put some sunglasses on you, pal. And then the dog was into it and you're like, yes. It's almost worth keeping somebody else's dog if they'll wear sunglasses for a photo. Yeah.

Well, they're well trained. You know you're going to get some good grams with that dog wearing things on its face. Move on to party hats next. And while we're talking about dogs with things on their heads, Stacey posted on her local page, anyone missing a husky dog with a cone around his head? And then just put in like this absolutely stoked looking, yet mildly drugged up husky up on their picket fence gate.

That's cute. I'd want to keep that. You can't just keep someone else's husky. I know. Yeah, and would it sit still with sunglasses on its head? Probably not. You're out, husky. Keep going.

Keep trying to find a stray. And finally, today in community notices, this is from the Lost and Found Pets Dunedin, New Zealand page. Pire writes, First, I would like to thank whoever stole my cat for returning him. Second, F you. Oh. They've returned the cat.

What's with the anger? F you. For smoking in the same room as him. Oh. They've returned the cat. What's with the anger? F you. For smoking in the same room as him. Did they hotbox a cat? No, just cigarettes. I am a smoker, says Paya. Yeah. I am a smoker, but I absolutely refuse to smoke in the same room as my baby.

They're innocent creatures who have no voice of their own. How dare you be so stupid and subject him to that? But how did she know? Somebody said, what's the deal? And apparently he stinks of cigarettes. Oh, no. But then the cat could have, there's multiple reasons for that. Well, the cat could have run away and had a few ciggies.

Yeah. The cat's, it's like when you came in from a party and your mum's like, have you been smoking? But like, no, the people were smoking. Mum, it was so bad. That's why I wanted to leave. People were smoking around me. Yeah, and it was yuck, mum,

and I said, guys, yuck. No. It's so bad. But she's absolutely livid. As a smoker, who always smokes in a different room to Puss Puss, she, as somebody,

has returned a cap, but they were a smoker that didn't not smoke in the same room as a cat. Those are today's community notices. If you see anything on Facebook

or anywhere screen cap it and send it to us FEMZM on Facebook. We'll always celebrate Kiwis on the show. Kiwis doing well on an international stage.

Yes. And congratulations must go to Jamie who just placed bronze at the CrossFit Games. This is like the Olympics for CrossFit. Like

burpee hell. Oh my god. How many burpees? So many. Yuck. I'd be like ow my wrists. Welcome to the CrossFit Games. We're starting with burpees. I'd be like, ow, my wrists. Welcome to the CrossFit Games. We're starting with burpees. I just would rather do the Hunger Games now.

Don't she have to do, because you get points, right? And then the person with the most points gets gold. Yeah. And it's like, what, over four days or a week or something. Yeah. I don't know what any of these mean, but she got fourth in the split triplet. Okay. Sixth in the clean.

That's like clean. Lifting? Weightlifting. Weightlifting, yeah. There's a clean and press, so she obviously just had to clean it rather than press it too. Fourth in the swim paddle. I didn't know that there was a swimming in CrossFit. I thought it was on dry land.

I thought it was primarily land-based. I'm still Googling split triplet. You Google that. You Google swim paddle. Maybe it's not swim. Maybe it's not. No, it is. It's like we're on a, that's a.

That's paddle. CrossFit Games water. No, there is. It's actually a water event. What do you do? Do you paddle? I mean, water. No, there is. It's actually a water event. What do you do? Do you paddle? I mean, obviously, the name was a giveaway. I'm actually watching Jamie compete in the split triplet.

What is the split triplet? You went for a purpose, Megan. You didn't go to Perth. If you could just have information about her, what is the split triplet? I mean, I'm seeing it, but I still can't. I think it's three different. Hang on.

Split triplet. Double under. Dumbbell hang split snatch. Double. You're not even talking English anymore, mate. Peg board ascent. So that's literally where they have to like peg into the wall. That's cool.

That's cool. That's where you climb the wall with like the pegs in your hands and you have to go from hole to hole. That's intense. Yeah. That's pretty cool. They have to do like these three different things. That would look pretty cool.

So then she got, so she was fourth in the split triplet, sixth in the clean, fourth in the swim paddle, sixth in ringer one, sixth in ringer two, and second in the standard. Even just watching these women skip Is just incredible You know how you skip And then your feet get caught And then you're tired

And you try and start again It's like No one's tripped And they've been going for a while It was a world games You wouldn't expect Has anyone whipped a toe? No

On the side of that Or an ankle Yes What about Did the rope start Because you know how they like twist and you hold them and still in your hand and eventually one will grip a little bit, it'll pull a bit of a twist in the rope and you'll whack yourself in the back of the head.

Or hit the ceiling fan at the gym and realise you probably shouldn't be skipping in that part of the gym. Yep, yep. Or rip off the fire hydrant thing and then like water rains down on you and you're like, oh. Do you know what? If I was good at all this stuff, I would bloody tell everyone on Facebook too. If I was good at all this CrossFit stuff,

I would tell everyone about it. She's amazing. I'm just on Instagram now, 164,000 followers. Wow. But there's a picture of her with a cake here. Oh, I hope she's going to do some burpees to make up for the cake. What kind of cake?

Oh, and then straight back into more exercise. How do you go back into exercise once you've had some cake? I don't know. Well, congratulations. No, look, it's like someone's holding the cake and she's got to do all the exercises before she... It's made of watermelon! Oh.

It's just a watermelon in the shape of a cake? She's an athlete born. She's not going to eat cake. That's so mean. I was excited about the cake from here. Well, congratulations. It's a top placing for New Zealand. Pretty incredible.

I sure hope this pre-recorded laughing isn't after something inappropriate to laugh at, but I just want to take a moment to say thanks to Spark for sponsoring the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. You can grab Spark's $29 prepaid rollover packs and get stacks of extra value. Back to the podcast. Senorita. Senorita. On to them. It's 19 to 8.

There's a great story in the news. Someone's in trouble. You're in trouble. This was spotted at a clean fill dump. I don't know what that is Is that where Okay clean fill is only permitted to accept Uncontaminated non-compostable inert material Like soil, rock, brick or concrete

From construction or demolition works So yeah So it goes into the ground It's not going to pollute And then one day they chuck some topsoil on top And some bark in one of those playgrounds Yeah exactly That's the end game, right? Or a pond

in the ducks. No household rubbish. No washing machines. No bits of wood or anything like that. Yeah, but that's the deal. Wainui Amata is where this clean fill station was and somebody in a lotto branded RAV4

was caught dumping non-clean fill landfill at the, now this is a classic if there's a big area like this. You'll see it any like, it drives me nuts. People who dump a household worth of rubbish on like a quiet side road or one of those areas on the side of the road they have for when they do roadworks and they keep all the different grades of asphalt

and bitumen and stuff in there. Or those little depots, rest areas on the side of State Highway 1, forestry tracks. They literally drive in there and just shove it all off. They don't want to pay the fees to take the car to the dump or the trailer to the dump. Yeah.

It's pretty bad. And you know, if you're not checking what's in your rubbish you can be found out. Yeah. Which is good. 100%. Love a story when someone gets caught because they left a bill. They find the power bill in there which links the person directly to a property and the rubbish that's been dumped. This photo

is great because it's like obviously someone seen this guy reverse up and start dumping his rubbish there and the lotto car sticks out like a sore thumb. Well, any promo vehicle does. That's the idea of a promo vehicle, isn't it? To grab people's attention. It's why we always

get told, anyone that works for, you know, the company gets told, you're in a company vehicle. Don't rip the fingers. How many times do we have to say that to Vaughan? Don't be aggressive. But then that time we borrowed another radio station's company vehicle. Don't rip the fingers. How many times do we have to say that to Vaughan? Don't be aggressive. But then that time we borrowed another radio station's company vehicle around here.

The Hodaki Ute. You had that argument with that lady, didn't you? I did. I said, what's your problem? You drove it like a maniac. I was like,

Matt Heath stops for no man. She was like, is that the one that you cut off in Christchurch? I didn't cut her off. I was like, Matt Heath stops for no man. She was like, Matt Heath wasn't... You cut off and crushed her? I didn't cut her off. It was merging and I was in front of her. Yeah, and then she got the shits with you because... She got really shitty. Maybe, I don't know, she

thought we weren't playing enough Metallica anymore or something and wanted to have a word with O-Racky, but yeah, I don't know. Wound down the window and let you have it. Said she was going to complain to management. And then she pointed at you and said, Jeremy Wells is falling to bits. I said, ouch.

I said, ouch. Yeah. You are a poor man's Jeremy Wells. Oh, don't tarnish Jeremy like that. Ouch. Again, ouch. So this is obviously a problem for Lotto given a branded vehicle's been yes for nefarious purpose but

we'd like to know what you use the cup your company car for maybe a branded vehicle yeah maybe you've been in trouble in the company car or somebody was in trouble and maybe they'd even found out who it was the company car got reported well here at work you've got to sign sign them out now yeah i know gone are the days where you could just take your company car and willy-nilly. I think Jase used to take the baby every night. Yeah. And they'd be like, oh, there's a speed camera, fine. You'd be like, it wasn't me.

And it was really hard to prove who it was. But, you know, some workplaces, like with giant fleets of cars, have GPS trackers. They limit your speed to 110 or 100. Yeah. You know, they know where speed to 110 or 100. Yeah. You know, they know where you are at all times. Yes, there's no getting away with it there. Logbooks, everything like that.

But, you know, you can... Logbooks. Like, those are... Truck drivers are like, logbooks. Logbooks, yeah. Good one, mate. Impossible to cheat. They're written in pen.

Back in the day, if you ever moved flat, you'd always get the station vehicle. It was the only thing with a tow bar. Yeah. Heck yeah. How many mattresses did we hold on the top of radio station company car vehicles to get from one place to another because we were

too cheap to hire a trailer? Many. Heaps of them. Many. All of them. So 0800 dials at M 9696 on the back of the fact that this person from Lotto's been seen dumping up the back of their company car, what did you do with the work car? Did you get in trouble?

Did you get away with it? Maybe something that you know you shouldn't have been doing in the work company car. Give us a call. Please forget. Well, Lotto in damage control today. You know, they've got this great ad at the moment, haven't they, where the lady crashes on her scooter. She's got the Lotto ticket under her car the whole time. You ever had anything under your cast?

No. They just go manky and stinky and rotten and wet. So you're saying that wasn't really... Well, either she kept

her cast and tipped up with her neck and didn't sweat or... Okay, well somebody's been seen dumping in a lotto company vehicle at a clean fill and it wasn't clean fill.

It was household rubbish. So, we asked what you've done that got you in trouble in the work car and no shortage of... Oh, some great stories. My ex borrowed his company's truck to help a mate move without permission. Got stuck under a low railway bridge.

Company were fine and he got a formal warning. At my partner's old job a couple of years ago, someone was caught picking up a lady of the night off a well-known street in Christchurch in the Wow, that's not caring at all, is it? the company worried that their staff member was homeless and sleeping in the vehicle. I used the work yurt for hunting. Parked down a long sort of like forestry road. Came back and it was gone. And somebody had seen it and reported it as obviously

stolen so a tow truck had come and put it on and towed it away. Oh my god. I wasn't supposed to have it on a forestry truck so. Then you just go yeah oh my my God, it was stolen. What happened? Sarah, what happened in the company vehicle? Hi, so my dad's workmate, he stole the work car and took it to the beach with his mates.

And then the tide came in, it got stuck on the beach. They couldn't get out and they had to end up riding the ute off because of the rust from the salt water. Wow. Oh, no. Smack bum. So it wasn't even meant to have it in the first place, let alone have it at the beach.

No, no, it wasn't the person who's at all. Because what's up when you take someone else's car? Are you even insured? I mean, people aren't thinking about this, are they? No. No. What's going to happen? Clearly insured? I mean, people aren't thinking about this, are they? No. No. No. What's going to happen?

Clearly not. Yeah. Sarah, thanks for your call. Sam, how did you get in trouble in the company car? It was actually someone I worked with. It was her first day at work. She took the car out. She took it into a car park that was too low and ripped a gaping hole in the roof.

Oh, no. I've always wanted hole in the roof. Oh, no. I've always wanted to see that happen. Oh, my God. Just drive it back, park it up, and say you didn't know it happened. And hope nobody notices the gaping hole in the top. Yeah. Oh, it was a big one. Did she stay at work much longer?

She was there for one other day, and that was it. They told her, don't worry, coming back. Oh no. Brilliant. Sam, thanks for your call. All good. Some more text messages. I used the work 12-seater transit on a pub crawl at the weekend in personal use.

Someone vomited in the back. Couldn't get that out. So that was problematic. My old job promoted health and well-being to school kids So obviously it was forbidden for our vehicles to be seen in or around takeaways Oh, yep On my last day, after a big argument with the manager I decided it was fast-forward drive-thru time I went through the drive-thru

And waved to school kids on the playground next to the drive-thru and they were like pointing and laughing and one of them may have even taken a photo but we won't go into too much about it. Somebody else said

a friend of mine borrowed the work vehicle to launch his boat at the marina. Backed in. Didn't have it in four-wheel drive. It was only in two.

Very skiddy. Dragged the amateur hour. Dragged the work ute backed in didn't have it in four wheel drive it was only in two very skiddy dragged the oh this is amateur I dragged the work ute into the water and the same thing happened as a quarter before

with the rust and everything not really good for cars to be dosed in salt water and they're not cleaned immediately

afterwards I really confuse people when I borrowed my partner's car, my partner's work car to deliver pizza. I would turn up with a Domino's thing on the roof in a sign written vehicle. That would be weird.

Quite confusing for some people. It's not just lotto. Everyone's having a go with the company car, let's be honest. Am I a bad person? Okay, I've had email correspondence from someone who shall remain nameless. It's a long one. I'm going to paraphrase.

I feel like we opened floodgates a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, but that's okay. With a couple of juicy am I a bad persons. We're here to help. Yeah, if you find yourself in a bit of a situation, you can email. People do, nobody emails Warnanai, it's always you. Or don't email me right now because I accidentally clicked on the restart to install software update on my computer. I always do send back like a little email about like what I think.

Yeah, Megan at ZMOnline.com or you can message our inbox FBMZM on Facebook. Okay, so yeah, I won't say her name. I have a sticky situation. I need an outside perspective on whether I'm being unreasonable or not. I've just broken up with my boyfriend of just over a year. We got together 18 months after he split up with his wife. He is a decade older and he has a little girl, but we did get along really well and the kid is really cool. Okay, so they were together for how long?

A year. But they got together 18 months after his marriage ended. Yes. She actually said that, you know, the first part of the... It was all good. It was fine and dandy. She got along with the kid, but he had a few insecurities because he was cheated on and she gets that.

And then she has said down the bottom, here is the problem. I have broken it off. I'm not ready for an instant family. I want to do a little bit more traveling. I'm not really in a great financial situation. So the bottom line is I'm not ready to commit to forever with him. Don't get me wrong. She loves kids. She plans on having her own one day. But at the moment, I've got a career to build up that I'm really passionate about. We broke up. He's not eating or sleeping properly. He's not deliberately blackmailing me.

But he says he can't help it. I think you can achieve anything if you put your mind to it. But he looks terrible. And it hurts me that he's suffering because of me. And that I just have to leave him to it when I know that he's not doing well. So here it is. Am I a bad person for calling it off or should I stay in contact

to look after him or do I need to leave him to it? Well, it's never easy, is it? A breakup? Well, you're not a bad person for breaking up with him because you've got to do what's right for you. Yeah. You're in no obligation.

If you obviously care about someone and you see that they're suffering and then you know that they've got a kid as well. Yes. It's obviously, does she leave him to it or does she need to go back there and help him out? But he's never going to move on if she's constantly there. Yes. Yeah.

So I feel like she's... But you don't want to abandon someone who's not doing well. No. I know. Yeah, that's because it's not like she hates him. But you also need to be clear with your intentions that this isn't going anywhere. And that could go on for quite some time.

Well, yeah, because you mentioned that, what, she feels emotionally blackmailed. No, she said he's... I know that he's not blackmailing me. Intentionally blackmailing me. But it does seem a little bit manipulative. Hmm. It's horrible, but I think she's just got to walk away.

Surely he's got people he can talk to. She can say, look, reach out and talk to your friends. Yeah. This is going to be hard. Do you have to do a bit more before you do leave? Do you have to make sure they do have a support network around them before you walk away? And that's hard too because you've created a relationship with the child.

Can you maybe like, oh, I don't know. I was going to say take the child out for day trips, but then that's hard because you're supposed to try and break up with the kid as well. Yeah, because you're in a relationship with the whole family situation. I mean, it the whole family situation. It's a horrible situation. Nobody likes a breakup, do they?

No. And it's always, I guess it's harder when it's her decision and it's not like he cheated on her. No, and it's not like she doesn't suddenly not care about him. And you see that he's suffering, but I don't know. Yeah, I don't think she's a bad person

for breaking it off, but what she does next is, I mean, I don't know. All, I don't think she's a bad person for breaking it off, but what she does next is, I mean, I don't know. All right, so this is where we take your calls because she needs some help with this. I don't know what to say. No. Has anyone been in a similar situation? That would be really helpful, you know,

if you had a breakup and there was a child involved as well. Or just breaking up with someone, you still care about them. And then you see that they're really suffering from it. Yeah, how do you kind of tiptoe around that? Oh, it's a horrible situation. 0800 DARS at M, 9696 to text us. Is she a bad person? Should she stay in contact or does she need to leave him to it?

Am I a bad person? So what a right pickle this is. So to paraphrase, someone has messaged in, they have broken up with their partner they were with for just over a year. He is a decade older, he has a child. And since they've broken up, he's been struggling quite a bit. Does she leave him to it to get through it or does she need to go back there to help him?

Is she a bad person just for walking away and leaving him to deal? Especially knowing that he's got a child. And he said he's not doing well. Hmm. Hmm. Well, a lot of calls and text messages. We'll start with Anonymous.

Good morning. What do you think, Anonymous? I've been in a really similar situation myself. Oh, okay. And so what did you do? So it wasn't as long-term relationship, and obviously we didn't have any kids or anything like that. Yeah.

But we were together for probably about... And he had had a long history of depression and self-harm and things like that. Oh, no. But while we were in the relationship, it started to take a toll on my own mental health. Okay. And I ended up saying, I need to leave this.

When I did reach the subject, the first thing he said was the only possible outcome of this was that he was going to kill himself. Jesus. object. The first thing he said was the only possible outcome of this was that he was going to kill himself. But with the support of my parents and things like that, I did end up leaving and he eventually said it was the best thing that ever happened to him. It was

the most loving thing that somebody could do was to prove to him how he could actually look after himself by himself and he's in the best state ever now and we're actually maintaining contact now years later. So when you left, did you kind of make sure he had a support network around him, or what was your leaving the situation like? Yes, I was in contact with his parents quite a lot.

They were separated, and he had a really good relationship with his mum, though. So I was in contact with her a lot, and I was good friends with his cousin who he so i was in contact with her a lot um and i was good friends with his cousin who he lived with at the time um so yeah and he his cousin was the one that initiated the counseling um but yeah it's horrible but my dad said something to me really strongly one day he was like that they either are or they're not, you know, and you have to live with that either way. But you still need to look after yourself first

if it's having an effect on you or if it's like, yeah, you're not going to be any help if you're in the same state yourself. And I think it's really important, like you said, to leave them with a support network. Like you made sure you followed up and that the mum and the cousin are always involved. But also had that distance between. Yeah.

Yeah. Anonymous, thank you. Lola, what do you think? Is she a bad person? No, I think she honestly sounds like a really caring person. I think this is, like, such a lesson that we're not responsible for other people's emotions. And I think, you know, this is going to be a learning opportunity for him to learn how to pick up the pieces himself like

not blame the situation on her and really get some help and to be honest like I think it's fair if she just cuts contact because she can't if she's feeling emotionally kind of manipulated even if she's not sure if that's his intent I I think probably subconsciously, like, he's just kind of, like, trying to cling on to her and it's just not healthy. Yeah, OK, nicely said. Lola thinks you're cool. Tanya, what do you think, bad person? Not at all.

She's not, OK? No, she's not. In fact, you know, your previous caller kind of nailed it. You know, he needs to figure out how to move on himself and you know sticking around to take care of him is not going to help him do that and also that yeah that daughter has another parent you know yeah you know so um so she's not actually her responsibility and her responsibility to herself is to take care of herself and make sure that you know she's not um she's not subjugating

her own needs to look after somebody else who needs to learn to look after himself. Yeah, well that's the thing she's recognised enough that the life she was leading wasn't where she wanted to be. Yeah, for sure. Tanya, thank you for your call. Some text messages. Somebody said she's not a bad person.

She may not think of it at the moment. She said it wasn't intentional blackmail, but manipulation pretty quickly can turn into it. That's what somebody who's dealt with that said. Right. And if he's 10 years older, he needs to stand up and be the adult and realise that he has responsibilities in the form of a child and seek himself some help.

When you're an adult, you still mentally feel like a kid anyway. We're just pretending. Yeah, yeah. We still need help. Tell kids that. We don't really know what we're doing. We've just been not knowing what we're doing for longer than you. Exactly.

Somebody said he definitely needs to seek help. I had a friend who was in a situation very much like this and talking and seeking professional help was actually the best thing he ever did. And it took somebody leaving to get him to get it. Yeah. I think supporting enough and talking to people around him to make sure that he's got people he can talk to. So that you can then move on. Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Somebody said not a bad person for leaving, but a bad person for hooking up with him in the first place and staying around for a year. Why are they a bad person for hooking up with him? For giving love a chance? Yeah. Not quite sure. Very much cared about the person. Initially, they were into it.

Yeah. I don't think they felt a bit at the... Everybody starts relationships into them. Nobody gets into a relationship hating the person, do they? No, I don't think so. You know what? I don't like you. Let's start seeing each other. Let's keep this going. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. it up again. I famously started this update just before. Because you told it to. Your computer has restarted to install these

updates. What are you talking about? Don't do that again. Oh, now I'm representing an update Microsoft Word. Get out of here. Go on, bugger off. But I'm just going to do the fact of the day. I've got it on my phone. Okay, right. Today's fact of the day is if the asteroid

that wiped out the dinosaurs had been 30 seconds later, dinosaurs might still rule the world and humans probably wouldn't exist. Why? So the dinosaur wiping out asteroid comedy space rock, it apparently hit just off the coast of Mexico, but enough of it hit and impacted on solid land that it created just this shockwave, this insane world ender, this species destroyer. And it sent ash up, blocked out the sun, temperatures plummeted, all the dinosaurs died.

And then little mammals were just like we got this because of our fur so suck on it we're going to take over the world and then the evolution and everything started from there and then led to us yeah of course he jumps in, he pipes in at some stage

with Adam and Steve and then they make babies and that's how we got here and then the kids are like how did it work with two? How did we hear with two dads? And Adam and Steve were like, hard to explain, a bit awkward. Did I say Steve? I meant Eve.

And the rest is history. Ask Israel Folau to fill in the gaps. So if the meteor had come half a minute later, it would have either hit the deepest part of the Pacific or the deepest part of the Atlantic. Which would have created some huge tsunamis. Yeah. But wouldn't have covered the entire earth.

Right. So it wouldn't have wiped out all of the dinosaurs. And they would have continued to roam. Yeah. And they would have evolved more rather than the ones that did survive, like turning into like chickens and birds and that. Yeah, right. And mammals really getting a foothold as the dominant sort of umbrella space.

Because we would have been eaten by the dinosaurs. We would have been eaten before we would have got to evolution. A big point. We wouldn't have had the free run. Yeah, right. And the resource to start as whatever we started as. Little micey rat things and then chimps and then all the way up through. Huh?

Okay. Because the mass of the meteor that wiped out the dinosaurs is well known because it's this massive Indian off the coast of Mexico, which at some stage was above, most of it was above sea level. Right. So yeah, it could have been completely different. 30 seconds. Wow.

I think this is exactly what that Ashton Kutcher movie, The Butterfly Effect was about. Exactly what it was about. One small decision today, ripples through time, big outcome. So just think about that today. Okay. Everything you're doing could destroy a species. Don't want to freak anybody out. It's a lot to take on this early on.

Recycle. Recycle, okay, right. Do your best to recycle. Okay. So today's fact of the day is if the comet that killed the dinosaurs had been 30 seconds later or earlier, it'll be an entirely different situation down here on EARF. Fact of the day, day,an and Megan, the podcast ZM. So it's a real issue around here that whenever there's free food,

and we get it quite a lot, like, I don't know, just deliveries or someone's birthday and then suddenly there's cakes and platters and everything. Free food you can't say no to. And it's always on a Monday or a Tuesday when you just had a big weekend and you're like, my diet starts Monday. I'm going to start. Be real good.

Yeah. But when it comes to work and then they say it's free, I don't know. There's something. It just makes you think, okay, well, it's free. I'm going to eat it. Because at least you didn't pay for it. Like, there's calories, but at least you didn't pay for it. So you shouldn't feel guilty about it.

And then you're like, well, I'm going to have this for my lunch instead. But then it gets to lunchtime and you're like, oh, I'm hungry again. I'll just eat my lunch as well. Yeah. So, yeah, it gets in the way of your diets. It gets in the way of clean eating or whatever. And an addiction specialist has actually revealed the reason why we cannot say no to free food. And it is actually in the word free.

So as soon as we hear free, apparently the brain doesn't recognise potential negatives. Like I said, you can't feel guilty because you didn't pay for it. Or like anything. Someone tells you free. Although it's different though when you're on the street because a lot of people when you're giving out free things on the street or in the malls, people always think there's strings attached, even if there isn't.

So like a lot of people are like, oh no, no. You're going to make me sign up for something. That's not always food though, is it? No. Yeah. But when it comes to free food, we're like, it's free. What could be the catch? So you're saying that could be the way to kind of combat your feelings about this

is by saying it's Tiffany's birthday today. Here's her birthday cake. It's a dollar a slice. Yeah. No one would eat it. I'm not paying attention. I don't like Tiffany that much. So I don't like the thought of I'm having to pay to celebrate her birthday. I'll eat it for free because I don't like

Tiffany. I'll be like, well, I'm taking a part of her celebration. What's fictitional Tiffany done to you that you don't like her? Fictitious. Everything. Everything. It just really riles you up, doesn't it? Tiffany doesn't like you either, so it's mutual.

No, I'm fine with that. That's how I like my relationships to be. Mutually, the mutual respect, mutual like, or mutual don't want to talk to each other. Right. But that's still cheap for a slice of cake, but as soon as there's even just $1 involved, people wouldn't eat it. There's a difference between paying $1 for a slice of cake. But as soon as there's even just $1 involved, people wouldn't eat it. There's a difference between paying $1 for a slice of cake and having it free.

Isn't that crazy? Right. As soon as you hear it's free, you're like, oh, yes, I'm in. Are there any birthdays in the office today that I feel like we've talked about cake enough that it's really kick-started the cake stomach? No. Now I'm going to go buy my own cake, which I'm also not happy about because I'm going to have to pay for it.

What if you go to the other levels and wonder? There's bound to be a birthday on other levels. I'll know I'm only there for the cake. I'll know I'm only there for something. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, it started out as a joke for a man called Kenny Kennard. Kenny Kennard's like, I'm going to change my name to Kennard's Hire. No, this is a man overseas, so he may not know about Kennard's Hire.

Well, the joke's on him. Did he not like Kenny Kennard? Well, that's just horrible when parents... I know, when they... John Johnson or Donald McDonald. I feel like I could make it work for him. There'll be a Donald McDonald. Oh, without a doubt.

Go on Facebook and just Google Donald McDonald. Or a Megan Megan. Donald McDonald, he's a footballer. He played Australian rules. But people would call him Donnie or Don. Donald McDonald is what Ronald McDonald's known as in Japan. Why? Donald McDonald.

I don't know. Should we find out? There's no me in me. Do some research. Do some research. Okay. Is there a Carl Carl? Carlos Carl?

Carlos Carl. It's already a last name. Carl Carlos. There would be. Fletcher Fletcher. There's a Carlos Carlos. Carlos Carlos. Carlos Carlos.

Carlos and Carlos. Carlos Carlos. You're definitely a gangster. What do you think from his profile picture? No, it's actually a Carlos. Oh, Carlos and Carlos. Carlos, Carlos. You're definitely a gangster. What do you think from his profile picture? No, it's actually a business. It's all right. Well, this guy, Kenny Kennard's like, look, I'm going to change my name, shits and gigs.

And he changed his name to F.U. Kennard. Foo Kennard. Is it F space U? Or is it big F little U? It says F.U U dash Kennard. Okay. Well, anyway, he's been told that he cannot have it on his official travel documents, his passport. He's a supermarket worker from Cornwall in the UK.

He has contested the passport's office verdict three times, but the home office in the UK is refusing to budge on their verdict that the surname may cause offence. Right. Apparently he had to apply for a driving licence. That was accepted fine, so he thought, well, I'll get the passport fine, no doubt, but he was wrong. It refused on the grounds that the name

could cause offence or was vulgar, and he's tried three times. Has he said... Here's a picture of his driver's license. Right. Kenny is his first name. He's kept that. So he was Kenny Kennard

and he wanted to change it to Kenny F.U. Kennard. Yeah. Kenny F.U. Kennard. I've got why Ronald McDonald's called Donald McDonald in Japan. Why? So, Ronald McDonald, translated into Japanese would be

Renudu Makudonrudo, I believe. You're trying. That would be easier for the Japanese to say, but visually it does not look as good as Donorudo Makadonrudo. And they were already familiar with Donorudo from Donald Duck. Right. So they were like, well, it's already familiar and this is going to be a lot to explain. So maybe we just go with Dunudo, Makadunudo. Yeah.

And that's how it is. Because McDonald's there is Makadun Donorudo. Right. Yeah. I feel like you're massacring your language. Grimace is Grimomasu. Hamburglar is Hamburgerer. That's actually how it's spelt.

Don't look at me like this. Everyone's looking at me like I'm racist. I'm reading it. N-H-A-N-B-A-A-G-U-R-A. And then it says phonetically Hamburgerer. Big Mac police officer is Bigu Mako Purisu, which is Purisu's place. Yeah.

Mia McCheese, however, had been changed in Japan where the character is Mia Chizumako. I hope any Japanese listeners that you haven't insulted them. I'm doing my best. Don't apologise. I was doing my best. I wasn't. That's all we can hope't apologise. I was doing my best. I wasn't. That's all we can hope for.

My intent was pure. Okay. We asked why he's not called Ronald McDonald. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app

or wherever you get your podcasts. And you say it lives here. ZM.