ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - December 04 2019

Episode Date: December 3, 2019

Fletch had to walk to work for the first time in months, Am I A Bad Person and who is your stranger friend?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music lives here. Fletch, Fawn and Megan, the podcast. Find out how I do it. Oh, that was just what I needed to start the show this morning. Oh, they wouldn't have worked. Fell in the water. Thanks, Anya. Oh, good stuff. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Fawn and Megan, Harm Day Wednesday. Don't call it.

You know the only reason I did that is because. That is lazy. That's lazy radio. I wanted to poke the bear because Bear Daddy Morn is very grump. He's real grump. No time for this shit. Let's just get the show done and go home. That's how we feel most days about you.

Come on, let's go. What's next? Story time. What else have we got written down here? Top six questions that need to be asked in the weed referendum. Okay, well, that's you. That's you. I love it when you're grumpy.

You're like, right, let's do this. Right, let's do this. Let's get it done. It's hot in here. Am I going through menopause? I think so. Menopause, yeah. It's not hot in here. I'm through menopause? I think so Menopause Yeah It's not hot in here

I'm just right actually You're right You're right? Yeah I'm good Your climate's right? It's because you're wearing pants Yeah I know I had none of those

Invisible socks left Which would give you Shit for wearing socks Yeah With your shoes And so I Put on a long pant And then I thought

It would be too hot For the standard boots So I put on a long pant. And then I thought it would be too hot for the standard boots, so I put on chucks, but they were... No much breathing going on here. I've got two little holes in the side. So it's basically your fault you're hot. Yeah. But I'm not accepting responsibility. I'm a white man.

Hello. Yeah, true. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Leave her alone, FFF. All right, children, listen up. It's story time. Producer Caitlin's trying to change the screens in the studio and she's refusing to give up.

I know I just said you've only got eight shows left. I don't know why you're trying to upskill now. And then, look at that face. Is that your bedside face? No, I mean, you're a nurse. Well, you're going to be a nurse. Your bedside manner. It's the same as your bedside manner.

And I said, is that your bedside face? Women love it when you say, look at that face with reference to anything. Well, it's a scowl, isn't it? It's a big scowl. Hey, sweetheart, why don't you smile more? We love that too.

Try that one. That's a good idea actually. Just an update. Caitlin, you don't look happy. Caitlin hasn't. Megan's just suggested you smile. You turn the power button on, Caitlin. Have you ever turned a TV on before?

Oh my God. It's got the red light on. I think you've got it on standby. Press up on the channel button. Press up on the channel button. Yeah, she said stop it, just for clarification. It's no wonder she's leaving. Just press up on the channel button.

Just ignore them, Caitlin. All right, story time. I've got three. While Caitlin fixes the TV in the studio, I've got three news headlines. She's just trying the same thing over and over. You are, though. You are are Press up on the channel button No, alright

She'll, okay Three news headlines Alright, headline one Man with crime pays Tattooed on forehead Wanted by police Headline two Free slip and slide for family

And headline three Super supermarket sizing up new uniforms. Oh, supermarket sizing up new uniforms. You like the sound of that? Design like a cool supermarket uniform. Okay. Karen Walker? Yeah, say yourself. Okay, let's say, for example, new.

Why do they have to be like. Well, let's say new world. Well, they need to be cheap, easy to produce. Yeah, you've got to make... Block colour. Yeah. What would you do for New World if they wanted a new uniform? What are their main colours?

Red and grey. Well, you wouldn't... No. White? It's not even white. Nah, there's no navy. God, no, your logos. I was thinking of night and day.

Well, you can't go full red because that doesn't suit everybody. Anybody. Yeah, and grey is not very becoming. You can't go full red because that doesn't suit everybody. Anybody. Yeah, and grey is not very becoming. I don't know. One thing they just do, don't they just do a black pant and a polo or a shirt? Yeah. Okay, what about countdown? Green.

Why do they pick such fair colours? Like a nice forest green. God, all the colours are quite horrible, aren't they? Yeah. What about a mitre 10, orange? Nice orange blouse. No, I don't know. See, you gave up already.

All right, well, are we locking this story in? A Dutch supermarket was going through the process of getting a new uniform. What's their colours? Do we know? It doesn't say. What's their colours? Do we know? It doesn't say. What's the supermarket called? It is called, it's the Netherlands top supermarket chain. The Albert Heijn retailer.

That'll give you enough. That'll give you enough. I can find. It's the largest. What it's called. It's been around for a while. Blue. Blue.

What kind of blue? Sky blue. Sky blue. Sky blue. So it was hoping to bring in new uniforms for its thousand staff, or rather its thousand Dutch stores. So many, many thousands of staff. So what they did is they set up an app and they asked all their staff to download it and then asked if they could then upload photos of themselves

in their underwear to work out sizes for new uniforms. Sorry, what now? What? So they wanted to shape the body shapes. Yes. To work out the average body shape so it would be a uniform that would be made for the, oh, wow. So they were like, oh, wow.

One staff member who is 17 said, I saw the poster hanging in our canteen and I was shocked. My mother thought it was a joke. But the manager told us that if we don't do it, we can't be in the store anymore because we don't have the right corporate clothing. The plan was apparently voluntary. But yeah, aim to bring in the new uniforms after people had uploaded the photo and their knickers to obviously someone in the new uniforms after people had uploaded the photo in their knickers.

Obviously someone in the IT department or wherever, who then would have literally thousands of employees' photos in their underwear. You can see the problem with this. Yeah, especially when your 17-year-old comes home and says, my boss wants pictures of me in my underwear. Yeah. It's not going to go down well. No, especially if you're under 18 as well. Yeah.

As many of the staff were, you know, like after school jobs and stuff. So they've now stopped this plan. Did anyone actually send pictures in before they stopped this plan? Well, I don't know. Probably. Because it sounds like the app was there and you could download it. That's the problem too when you're like, someone's in a position of power and they tell you you have to. When you're young you think you have to. Yeah. Good lord.

Next on the show, global warming is causing a couple of new changes. Just a couple. On top of what we already know. Skinnier polar bears. On top of that. The polar bears are stoked. They are shredded for summer. And the summer will last forever. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Global warming is a big issue, obviously.

There's a new issue that has been identified with global warming. Warning. Morning. What should we call global warning? Is it global warning for global warming? It's climate change, right? Climate change. Because then every time it snows,

old boomers are like, well, where's your global warming now? President Trump actually said that. We don't call him President Trump. We call him Donald. Donald. The Don. Yeah, the Don.

So scientists have been studying births and they have found that when temperatures are higher than 32 degrees, birth rates rose by 5%. Birth rates rose? Yeah. Many kids have been born days before their due dates but also some like up to two weeks earlier than expected. All because of climate change?

Yes. Wait, you mean premature birth rates? No, just birth rates. So that would just mean hotter countries will have a higher birth rate? Would it? Because wouldn't it have to be abnormally hot? Or just higher than 32 degrees?

Maybe it does correlate. Dubai would sit at about that even in its winter, wouldn't it? It'd rock at 32. Yeah, yeah. So they believe that heat can cause hormonal changes in pregnant women and it can bring on labour sooner, which is going to be an issue. Because obviously two weeks early is not too much of an issue. No, that's not too bad.

Probably if you're hot too and you're super heavily pregnant and it's really hot, you'd be thankful for two weeks. You're like, yeah, that's okay. The baby's going to be healthy. That's just another issue with global warming. I was reading by the end of the century, Melbourne and Sydney will experience frequent

50 degree days. I can't even imagine what that... That's if like global warming continues at its current rate. How hot was it when we were in Dubai? Like late 30s? 30s, because we were there in winter. Yeah.

So it was manageable, but it was still hot. Yeah, it was hot. It does get insanely hot there. But yeah, I can imagine Sydney being... Could you imagine going to Sydney or Melbourne for the weekend? It's 50 degrees. No, thanks. No.

Yeah, it was 43 degrees when we were at my brother's place once because he lives inland. Right. Like real bushfire territory. It's too hot. It's insanely hot. Just dry, depleting heat. Yeah.

What are you supposed to do in that? Have air conditioning. Yeah, stay inside. Air conditioning. A fan. Hope that the warehouse hasn't sold out of fans. Although I did see, where was I the other day? I think it was Bunnings and Mitre 10.

They had a massive pile of fans. Mitre 10 the other day had a bunch of fans. You've got to get those. Now's the time because we always get back in Jan and it's fanageddon and the fans are sold out. Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. There's a new supermarket trolley coming.

New World and Farrow are going to be trying this. Oh, that's a fancy one for rich people. My mother-in-law loves a trip to Farrow and I love going with her because I go, oh, like this, things that I want but I don't want to spend the money on. She's like, what is it? I'll be oh it's just it's very interesting rub i'll pop it in the trolley and i'll be like oh it's 30 dollar camembert she's fallen for it again pronounced faro what am i saying faro oh faro fresh faro fresh i thought yeah i don't know. Farro. Yeah. I heard someone pronounce it farro. Farro.

Is it like wheelbarrow? Barrow is B-A-R-R-O-W. Yeah, maybe. Barrow fresh. Farro. Barrow. Yeah, sure. Farro. Right. Eh. The expensive nice place. With aged meats and such. It's going to be trialling.

I can imagine Barbara from Grey Lynn pushing this around Farrah yeah oh my god pistachios are crazy but you know you've got to have them

and it's basically a supermarket trolley with a tablet in the handle but where you'd usually sit the kid but the weird part is there's still the part

to sit your kid so your kid sitting in the trolley is just going to have a face full of tablet. Right. So is the tablet, do you scan stuff? Yes. The tablet, you scan it and it will say, beep, one bottle of virgin cold pressed olive oil. Are you still at Faro?

Yes. Does it say it like that? Yeah. Oh, darling, that's just divine. What's the, you know when you get like breads and it's got an olive oil dip and it's got the black stuff in it? Balsamic reduction, probably. Balsamic reduction in that, darling.

Get yourself a chip bottom leave. And then you pop in your trolley. And it must have weight sensors in it. I was going to say because it would be like a self-serve checkout on wheels. Yeah, but those things are bastards, aren't they? Aren't you missing from the bagging area? That's the problem.

You'd literally be driving, wheeling around the supermarket needing the assistant every aisle. Yeah. Right. Unless you're going to put an assistant on every aisle. So in it goes. Yeah. And you walk around and put an assistant on every aisle. So in it goes. Yeah. And you walk around and then you just like pay with your Air Force card. And then the tablet thing's like beep and then you walk out and it's like this person's paid.

Now, I would imagine this also has a very hard wheel locking function, meaning you can only go a certain amount of metres from the supermarket because they're not going to let you wheel away. Because shopping trolleys are about $500 each, just your normal ones. Are they? That's why supermarkets will sometimes hire helicopters to try and find them in suburbs because people wheel them home. And then just chuck them in a creek or keep them in the backyard or turn them into grills.

So these ones, you're right, they must lock up like an e-scooter or something. But what about, because would you put your handbag or your bag when you go shopping in your trolley? No, I always keep it on me. You always carry it on you? Yeah. But then you put your baby in. Do you then put your baby in or your bag and then press like start? Baby.

So it knows that it's not a bag of potatoes. Maybe. Or it's not like, please remove baby from the trolley area. But then famously, kids don't sit still. They'll want to get out. And they could grab something from the shelf, and then your trolley beeps because you haven't scanned it. Yeah.

And then how are they going to know how heavy your baby is? Because you put it in first. Are you bringing your own bag? Are you bringing your own baby? You could put your baby in at the same time as something else and be like, this is how heavy the baby is. Not that I would, I'm just saying, this is how you get around. But that, what was it, pack and

save, do they still, some of those do the old where you took the scan around and you scanned everything, put it in your trolley and then at the end you paid and then they did a random shoplift check just to make sure that all your... Which to me defeats the purpose of, if you're trying to save time and do all this yourself,

if they're then going to check that you're not shoplifting anything and they've got to go through every item, you might as well just scan it then and there. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, when you go through the checkout. I don't know. And there's a black band around the top of the trolley as well. And I've tried looking for what that is.

I can't find out. I can't see anything. But it's like a black band around the top of the trolley. So that might like scab somehow read things when it goes in. Because Amazon are trialing stores, aren't they, overseas where you just literally walk in, take it off the shelf, and it'll just bill you. Really? Yeah.

Because it's all infrared and, you know, frequencies and stuff. It knows what you've taken. You, I'm guessing, have your phone account. It just charges you. Yeah, it'll just be like Uber. When you get out of the car, it just charges your credit card. Ah, that's amazing. The future.

Yeah, right. You don't want to be charged twice, though. Especially at Faro. You get broke. The future. Yeah, right. You don't want to be charged twice though. Especially at Farrow, you get broke. Farrow. From the ZM Think Tank, this is The Top Six. Hello there. The cannabis referendum, which will be happening as part of our general election next year, some details upon it.

It will include... Hey, man. Just give us a break. It will include questions on edibles. Okay. Like, do you think we should have them? Yeah. Okay. I just imagine you go to the bloody cafe and they give you the wrong one. You've got a meeting and you've just had a brownie.

They're going to have to seriously label these or have a different section. I was just thinking, so I'd imagine you'd apply for a licence, like a liquor licence. And then you could sell. Would you, if it became legal, Megan? Would I do it?

Yeah, because it's legal, right, but there's still people that will be against it on principle. And I wondered if like, what would you have to kind of do the maths, right? Would it be more beneficial for you to start stocking it? But you might have to be an independent.

Or wouldn't that, an actual independent just weed that way. Just do that. Because I was just thinking of, not morally, but how much the license would be and then how much edibles are you actually going to pass through,

whether it'd be worth it. You could go a wee donut of the week. And then, yeah, there would probably be restrictions on maybe you'd have to cook it in a separate area. I don't know. There might be quite a few restrictions. Make it too hard. Solves the munchie problem at the same time.

Yes, that's true. Very true. You should have a rule where you, if you're going to have a brownie, you have to eat it there just because by the time you've finished, you want some more food. Oh, no, you should definitely have to be at home because I don't know if you've ever tried edibles,

but your body doesn't want to do much after it. It's true. It's like, I don't want to stay here forever. God, you'll never get people out of your cafe. No, yeah, that's true. You're going to need a bigger cafe. Also, purchasing limits. Okay.

So a maximum of 14 grams per day. I don't know. I don't know much about this. I don't know how much 14 grams is if we're talking teaspoons of sugar. It's like three, but I don't know what that translates to in dried. And then if you're doing edibles, how is that calculated? Yeah, good call. Good questions.

All good questions. And here are six more questions they need to ask in the Marijuana referendum. Number six, should we pass the duchy to the left-hand side? Or is that an American thing and we should pass the duchy to the left-hand side? Or is that an American thing and we should pass the duchy to the right-hand side like we drive on the right-hand side of our cars? Oh, yeah, good question. You know, we sit on the right-hand side. I know we drive on the left-hand side of the road,

but our car driver's seat is on the right-hand side. But the song's already there, isn't it? Pass the duchy to the left-hand side. That is a neat song. Yeah. Pass the dutchie to the left and say it. That is a neat song. Yeah. Pass the dutchie to the right and say it. Works both ways. We can adjust that.

Number five. Are you looking for that song? I'm going to look for that song, yeah. I'm going to look what it's called. Isn't it just called Pass the Dutchie? And then there was the Missy... Didn't Missy Elliott do a... Oh, I don't know.

Pass the Dutch. Oh, Musical Youth. And then there was the Missy Elliott did a version where she... It's not a cover of the... I've got Missy Elliott's, but I've got the original as well, though. Okay, you play us both. Okay, stand by, stand by. Are these radio edits?

Dunno. They're in the radio system, so... Oh, this is great music for the background. Let's hear this in the background. There's not enough songs, man. Just someone's going... It's... It's why you love Sean Paul. No songs. Just someone's going. It's why you love Sean Paul.

And it's from the left-hand side. Oh, right. Either way, it's past the dachshund. To the left-hand side, past the dachshund. From the left-hand side. Right. So you're going left to right. So that's okay.

Like a right swipe. Yeah. Like reading. Or like Tinder, I think. Okay, number five. On the list of the top six questions they need to ask in the marijuana referendum. That radio consultant was saying yesterday about how, you know, you just like... We waffle on too often. You waffle on and go on a tangent.

Yes. And I pointed at you and started laughing and he said, why are you laughing? And I just went, Vaughn. Yeah. Number five. Will there be a standard bucket size for Buc-ee's? Like, are we saying 10 litre bucket, 1.5 litre of Coke,

bike valve in the lid? Or are we saying 2.5 litre of Coke, bike valve in the lid? I think you'll be confusing the referendum, Vaughn, if you bring this in. I'm just wondering, is this something we need to agree upon? Number four on the list of

the top six questions they need to ask in the Marijuana referendum. Will it be okay to call it DAC? My dad called it DAC a couple of weeks ago, and I just really laughed. That's a

generational thing. That guy was on the deck, I could tell. Number three on the list of the top six questions they need to ask in the marijuana referendum. Will there be any sort of... Why are you saying marijuana? Marijuana. Will there be any sort of badge to indicate

who else is on the hooch? So you're just going to be like oh yeah, that's cool man. Carry on. Number two on the list of the top six questions they need to ask in the Marijuana referendum. Along the lines of the badge, will there be

levels? Levels of what? Like you know at school when you got like a prefect badge and then they hung underneath what you'd done. I was just thinking like different levels of it. So like you've clocked gold or something? You've clocked edibles.

Right, you've gold elite. Like brownies, you get a badge. Yeah, well brownies, both marijuana brownies and brownies, the girl troop. And you get badges. Girl troop. Sew it onto my girl guides blanket.

Yeah, great. And number one on the list of the top six questions they need to ask in the marijuana referendum. Do we have an agreed upon playlist? Well, this seems to be on it. I bet you there's already one on Spotify, like weed smoking hits or something. I'm going to literally search weed smoking hits.

Someone will 100% have made a playlist. Oh, they have a better name for it than weed smoking hits. It was on the spot. I don't know what to say. No, there's no playlist called weed smoking hits. See? There is, however, a playlist. Is there a marijuana Monday?

Lots of weed smoking. Yeah. Ah, this one is just called Weed Smoking Music. Oh, there you go. Weed Smoking Music. Oh, there'll be hits, without a doubt. Well, you get to have your say next year in the referendum. Yes, that is today's top six.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. So, there is a Christmas, it's a festive installation, shall we call it, that happens. It gets put up on the 1st of December every year in Hokitika, on the west coast of the South Island. And I didn't realise that this gets put up every year, but there is one person who complains. There might be more, but there's one person that complains about this every year. His name is Caleb, and he says that this is an insult. So... Oh, what is the sign? Because it's Christmas.

It's a Christmas sign. Do you know what Hooker Ticker's catchphrase is? Cool little town. I love that. What is a cool little town? www.coollittletown.com It sounds like they didn't get much into the planning process or the brainstorm.

Beautiful area. Oh, it is beautiful. Phenomenally picturesque. Yeah. So there is a sign. It's just letters in town that says hooker ticker. And then it's like in a little island where there's plants and stuff and there's stones.

A traffic island? No. It looks like a little park. At the front of it, they have put two... It says Ho Ho. It's all decorated Christmassy. At the start of the Hokitika sign, it says Ho Ho.

You'd go, Ho Ho Hokitika sign, it says ho-ho. So you'd go ho-ho Hokitika. No. That's the issue here. Ho-ho Hokitika. Ho-ho Hokitika. If you're an old white person, you'd go ho-ho Hokitika. Yeah. He's saying ho-ki.

He's got a point, but what's stopping you saying ho-ho, ho-ka-ticka? Nothing. Or saying ho-ho, ho-ka-ticka. You say it like Santa says it, and it's more of a hearty ho. Like he's laughing. He's not going ho-ho-ho. He's going ho-ho, ho-ka-ticka. Ho-ka-ticka.

Yeah. Ho-ka-ticka. I mean, I can see his point, but at the same time, it's... You're saying get over it. I'm just saying, like, it's just a cute Christmas sign in front of the town name to me. To you. Yeah.

But then someone's pronouncing, you know, like in this day and age, we should be doing better to pronounce names how they're supposed to be pronounced. But I would pronounce Hawitika like that. So when I see that sign, that's, in my head, that's what I,

but I can see what they've done and yeah. Yeah, because lots of people call it Hokie. Yeah. Or yeah, just Hokitika.

So like, ho, ho, Hokitika is just not, it's not really acceptable anymore. Right. Well, luckily we don't broadcast

down there, so he hasn't heard this break, has he? Caleb. We're kind of understanding of his plight, though. Oh, absolutely, yeah. It is saying a name wrong. What would it be like if people just started saying the first syllable of your,

or the first sound of your name wrong? Yeah. Like if they started calling you call. Or cow. Yeah, it does happen in America. wrong. Yeah. Like if they started calling you call. Or cow. Yeah, it does happen in America. Cow. Yeah.

Megan. Yeah. Megan. That annoys me. Yeah. Am I a bad person? We have correspondents this morning from a female.

She needs to know if she's a bad person. It's something relating to her relationship. So you need to hear her plight and then judge your pants on New Zealand and decide if she's a bad person. I love this segment because New Zealanders, we love to judge. We love to have an opinion, don't we?

We never really call them bad people. It's just a decision they're having trouble with. Sometimes we do, though. Okay, so no names. We get some that are literally so blinded to their own terrible behaviour that we don't even, they don't make it to air. We're like, oh my God, look at this. We read out this person who's basically admitting to some sort of moral crime.

We're like, how do they not think they're a bad person? There needs to be a bit of a split. You can't just sit on it. Yeah, we pick the ones where there's like an interesting take for each side maybe. If you find yourself in one of these situations, drop us a message. FVNZM on Facebook. Always happy to help out. So this one from a female.

My partner and I have been together three years. I am really keen to get married and we have spoken about it. He is very traditional and wants to do it his way in his time. But I'm sick of waiting and I want to propose to him. It's 2019. Yep. Am I a bad person? It's gonna be 2020 by the time she gets around to it.

Yeah. Am I a bad person for stealing his thunder? Should I just wait? I'm just googling. Percentage of females that propose. Because who cares who proposes in this day and age? There's no rules. But if your partner's had something in his mind this whole time

and he's very traditional, I don't know if it means that much to him should you respect it. So according to one study that I can find, this was done by CBS, only 5% of those currently married say the woman proposed. For how much? 5%? 5%. Right.

See, I don't know of many people where I know the female that's proposed, maybe one or two. Yeah. And my whole life out of everyone I know that's been married, it's not normally the men. I don't think there's anything wrong with it. It's just I wanted the romantic gesture because, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. It's just I wanted the romantic gesture because, I don't know,

that's what I'd always imagined. And normally the man would ask the parents, wouldn't he? Yeah. He'd go into the traditional thing and seek permission. Yeah. But it is very,

it's traditional and it's old fashioned. But if he said he's going to. Yeah. But when though? Don't dwell on it. Is it odd for a woman to be impatient and wait for the proposal like, don't dwell on it. Is it odd for a woman to be impatient and wait for the proposal? I don't like your tone, bitch. I don't know any woman who can't wait.

Do you remember when Megan was going to Rarotonga and we were like, oh my God, he's going to propose. He's going to propose. And you were like, oh my God. I was like, don't you. No, she was like, no, no, no, no. That's not what this trip is about. But you could see this glint in the back of her eye. Imagine if he hadn't proposed.

I know. He would have been in trouble and he'd done nothing wrong. And you would have ruined that for me. And when it happened, all I could think about was you two. Yay. That's awful. When you were deciding, hey, we're going to go on holiday, in your head when you were like at the travel agent

because you're a boomer and you still use the travel agent, were you like, we need to go somewhere romantic just in case he proposes to me? No, I just wanted to go to an island. Remember we went to Queenstown for work just before that. He was going to propose in Queenstown. I was like, thank God you did it because I was with you two. Well, I was in Rarotonga

as well when you did it. Sadly not close enough to be like, told you! Hello! Hello! Only me! Told you so. Na, na, na. That's awful. Having Fletch on FaceTime being like, see you, I told you.

Here's Fletch too. Hello. When I saw you on the bus that time, Sharae, your wife said that she was like looking at my finger for a ring. And it hadn't happened at that point. But she was like, what's that there? What's that there? She spied.

There is a pressure though, isn't there? Yeah. Where the female's like, come on, do it, do it, do it, do it. Yeah. And you've always, lots of females have in their mind that that's how it's going to go down. But she obviously doesn't, which is fine. But then is she a bad person for wanting to propose? No, but if it doesn't mean much to her, then it obviously means a lot to him that he proposes.

Yeah. So should she be patient? Well, let's take some calls. What do you think if you're listening? 0800-DARZATM-9696 to text. I doubt we're going to hear from many females that have done the proposing because it is very rare. But maybe you've been in the situation where you've been maybe a little bit impatient.

Maybe you've had to drop some hints. I don't know. Give us some thoughts. Maybe you've got a tip or two for her. Maybe she does need to be patient. Oh, yeah, because famously the 29th don't know, give us some thoughts. Maybe you've got a tip or two for her. Maybe she does need to be patient. Oh yeah, because famously the 29th of February. Yeah, the leap thing. That's coming up. That's when they're like, women can

propose, but you can propose anytime. Anytime you want. Alright, well I want to hint her at 966. Give us a text. Is she a bad person? Am I a bad person? So we've had correspondence from a female who wants to know um if she is a bad person for proposing to her partner of three years he is very traditional and he wants to do it his way in his time but she's sick of waiting is she a bad person for wanting to steal his thunder i mean

i don't think she's bad i think she's's just impatient. Yeah. Like, you're still with him. He's not going anywhere. That's true. If you're planning on being married anyway, if your future's going to be together, then what's the difference? Rachel, what do you think? Is she a bad person?

No, not at all. I proposed to my husband. Okay. What was his reaction? He was pretty okay with it, actually. We kind of find it a really nice story now because, yeah, it's us, really. He knew we wanted to do it, and apparently he'd already asked my dad. But, yeah, he just kind of never got around to it.

He's not a romantic person. He didn't really know what he was going to do. And, yeah. What did you, because traditionally when men propose to a woman, there's a ring. But what did you give to him when you proposed? So I got a pint glass engraved and it said so and so, when you finish

this pint glass, I'm going to ask you a question. And in the bottom of the pint glass it said will you marry me? Oh, that's pretty cute. I like that. And then he can keep it. Yeah, unless he left that little bit of beer at the bottom because it was warm. You know, he was like, I don't want to finish that. It did take him a while to actually drink it.

Right. Was he just like, where is this going? No, he knew straight away. He knew straight away. So your advice is for her to just do it? Oh, it depends. My husband's not traditional. And lots of people have very strong opinions about it happening as well.

Yeah, I bet they do. If he's a little traditional and wants to do it, don't take it away from him, but I knew it didn't really matter to my husband. Yeah, right. And also, good advice. I said right up until the minute I proposed to Sade, I kept saying, no, it's not happening.

Because you want the element of surprise. You want them to be swept off their feet. And if you're like, yeah, it's coming, then it doesn't have that same pizzay. Yeah, they start booking holidays to Rarotonga and the hype happens. Force is hand. Workmates are saying, it's happening, it's happening. Thanks, Rachel. Some text messages.

I've been with my partner for eight years and he wants me to propose and I want him to propose so we're stuck in this stupid cycle. He's the one I'll be with for the rest of my life so it doesn't really bother us anymore. Wait, did you say he wants her to propose so we're stuck in this stupid cycle. He's the one I'll be with for the rest of my life so it doesn't really bother us anymore. Wait, did you say he wants her to propose?

Yeah. Oh, wow. And she wants him to propose. Yeah, okay. Sounds like he's got this figured out, eh? Yeah, he knows how to get out of it.

It was like when same-sex marriage got passed and heaps of guys that didn't want to marry their partner were like, hey. Oh, God. I had that handy excuse of, it's illegal.

Yeah. A civil union is just not the same. No. I'm not doing a civil. I'm not getting married until we have the same rights. Yeah. Congratulations, you got the same rights. Oh, dear. I proposed to my husband. He wasn't expecting it, but he loved it. I asked his mum

for permission instead of his dad because it was all a bit backwards. That's cool. It was all because I was getting a little bit impatient. Yeah. Someone, Mike, messaged in saying she's not a bad person but how does she know that he doesn't have something planned for a certain special date? Like Kenny said.

Yeah, playing it down until then. Yeah. I think she's got to sit tight. Yeah, I think she should sit tight too. He'll do it. He sounds traditional. Somebody else said we need a bit more information

because to say they've spoken about marriage is a big difference between saying I'd like to get married one day and I want to propose to you. I just wait for the right occasion to like,

to what extent of this chat has been had. I think she should wait. Someone else said, that bitch can wait. I've been waiting nine years. Yeah. And they've only been together three years, so exactly. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

Seven shows to go for producer Caitlin after today's show. But we're already awake. That's the hardest part. You know what I mean? Wake up. As soon as I'm awake and I'm like out of bed, I count that day as done. Because that's the hardest part of the day. The hardest part is waking

up. Yeah, it's getting out of bed. Right. Not the actual work in the whole day itself, just waking up. No, that's a piece of cake. It's the fun bit. Right. It's the waking up. That's the hardest part. Always when you've done the hardest part of the day, count that day as done. Well, if you missed the news, producer Caitlin is leaving us at

the end of the year. Uh-huh. And she's gonna study next year and become a nurse. Good riddance. Come on. I'm trying to make it, like, you know, in the movies where they want the dog, but they can't have the dog, so they're like, go on, get out of here! Go on, scram! No one wanted you anyway, you know, in the movies where they want the dog, but they can't have the dog, so they're like, go on, get out of here!

Go on, scram! No one wanted you anyway, you stupid dog! Just don't refer to me as a dog. But what movie is that? That's not in all the movies. That's not all the movies with the dog. That's not a thing. Get out of here, Marley and me.

Marley and me? Yeah, I would rather say that than watch Marley and me. Anyway, good riddance. Seven shows to go, but you've learned that the occupational field you'll be moving into, I mean, you knew it wasn't all sunflowers and bloody lollipops. Yeah, I mean, like, I'm okay with needles. Like, I'm fine with blood. Snot's a bit gross.

I can deal with vomit and poos. Oh, you would prefer vomit than snot. Yeah. Nurses do an incredible job, You would prefer vomit than snot. Yeah. Nurses do an incredible job and they do not get paid enough. Yeah. I've said that every time. They're incredible people. Yeah.

They're super human. Yeah, exactly. But I'm wondering if you've made the right decision. So, yeah, so I obviously knew I had to deal with all of that vomit, poos, all of that kind of stuff. My good friend is a nurse and she's just finished her study and she's now working. I'm not sure exactly.

She must be in like ER or something. And she put up on her Instagram, if you're squeamish, don't look at this next photo. And I was like, because this is the thing like with me now that, you know, when you're on Facebook and you go past those videos and it's like pimple popper videos and I'm like, oh, I don't want to see that. I now watch them. So I'm like preparing myself for all the gross bits. For puffs and stuff.

Yeah, yeah. So I was like, okay, I'm going to look through. I did not realise that I would potentially, as a nurse, have to deal with maggots. Who had maggots? A person. A person had maggots somewhere in their body. And I'm now on her Instagram watching 50, 40 to 50 squirming maggots covered in blood obviously being taken out of a person's body.

Oh, my God. Oh, I apologise if you're eating breakfast. Oh, yeah, sorry. That just made me a little queasy. Oh, sorry. No, it makes you queasy. But also that's another thing that you realistically have to accept nurses deal with. And I mean, not for you moving into it, but people listening,

next time that there's a nurse strike and you're like, what do they want more money for? Yeah. Remember this part where the thought of it made you not want to eat. Yeah. Yeah. So, um. Any regrets?

That's cool. Is it too late for you to stay? Maybe. I think there's like, you know, got my leaving present. I'm like off the payroll. Oh, my God. Imagine getting a leaving present and then not leaving. And then staying.

Yeah. Oh, my God. I should try that. Yeah, I want to do that too. Someone did that. Someone's done that that we know. I swear. Really?

I've been dealing with StudyLink guys. Oh, my God. Can you imagine being nearly 30 and having to deal with StudyLink again? That's me. Yeah. No, but I mean, yeah, like I'm so excited. I'm sure that's going to be a little part of it. And you know what I'm like?

Like I just get on with things. I just go in. I'm like, right, I've got a job to do. I've just got to do it. Let me get those suckers out of there. And it's like there'll be, like any job, really rewarding parts, really good bits as well as so like Vaughn's the maggots and then Jason Derulo comes and you're like, oh, hello.

And then you realise that like, yeah, every job has its good and bad bits. I was going to flinch at the maggots and then Megan's like, oh my God, sometimes a bit snotty, but other than that, not a maggot. Wow, that turned around, didn't it? No, Megan's an old person that shit themselves, but won't let you clean up. And is like, bring your hands off me. And you have to restrain them and clean them.

That's you. If I'm maggots in a wound. We're just talking about difficulty levels here, not like being an actual maggot. Although you, Vaughn, close. Megan's an anti-vaxxer. Oh, no. Don't even compare her to that.

I am not. Medical comparison. I don't like jabs, but I always get them. Good girl. All right, well, Caitlin's last show next Friday. And are we starting tomorrow, James? We're going to do our favourite parts of producer Caitlin over the last... How long have you been here, exactly?

How many years? Six years with you guys. Nearly six years. Lord, that must have been awful. It's a long time. Good Lord. Okay, well, our favourite moments, Lord, that must have been awful Yes, it's a long time Good lord Okay, well our favourite moments We're going to start counting those down from tomorrow

The Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast Thanks to... Who left their email ding on? Was that you? Aren't ya? I'm recording The Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast Thanks to Spark

Wrap up any mobile this Christmas With a Spark prepaid gift box. You can turn your dinger on now, aren't you? We need to talk about a kid's book. Is it PC gone mad? Does it need to change? Do we need to take the books off the

shelves? I'm not sure. What are they called? Mr. Men? There's Little Miss as well. It falls? Mr. Men? Mr. Men. So then there's Little Miss as well. Yeah, but it all falls under the publishing title of Mr. Men. That's another problem. Why does it all fall? Mr. and Mrs.

Because they were there first. The Mr. Men. So there was like Mr. Tickle. Little Miss Naughty. Yeah. Mr. Nosey. He was like a triangle Yeah yeah

He was a big nosey triangle Yeah Little Miss Curious Mr Clumsy This one There was pretty much A female and male Equivalent of everything right

Yeah right But they're still called Mr Men Could be partnered up Mr Happy Mr Greedy That was the publishing umbrella Megan Mr Sneeze Jesus

Oh and Mr Tall He had bandages And he was blue Because he. Mr. Sneeze. Oh, and Mr. Tall. He had bandages and he was blue because he always had his head on things. No, that was Mr. Bump. Mr. Bump was the blue one with bandages. No, he's under here, Mr. Tall. No, that's Mr. Bump. There's a mislabel there. Is there?

Yeah, Mr. Bump was the one, the very clumsy guy. Mr. Snow, Mr. Messy. Yeah, there's quite a few of them. See the guy that brought cocaine to the staff, buddy. Yes. So it's with these books that we have a few of them. Right. Mr Silly. See the guy that brought cocaine to the staff bar. Yes. So it's with these books that we have a problem. So they're called Mr Men, Trademark, and Little Miss, Trademark. Okay.

So they are split out. Yeah, right. Okay. I have another problem with that, but that's for another time. So it's with the Mr Men and Little Miss book series that we have a problem. There is a student in Scotland. Her name is Shelby. And she has been, well, she's angry about a scene in which Mr. Clever and Little Miss

Curious discuss the fourth bridge. So that's in capitals. Are they just out for a day looking? The fourth bridge. Okay. They're looking at, are they just out for the day looking at bridges? Yeah. Okay. Oh, right. I at, are they just out for the day looking at bridges? Yeah. Okay.

Oh, right. I thought this was some like deeply philosophical. No. Like, you know, the fourth wall when they, in the movies where they break the fourth wall and they address the audience. Yeah, right. I thought the fourth bridge was something else. Okay, so there's the fourth bridge.

They're literally talking about a bridge named the Fourth. Okay, so they've seen three other bridges. Have they? This is the Fourth. Mr. Clever explained that it was named after the River Forth. Oh, so wait, they haven't been to three other bridges? No, yeah. Oh, I'm looking at the Forth Bridge right now.

It's an actual bridge. It's a Cantilever Railway Bridge, nine miles west of central Edinburgh. Okay. So he explained it's named after the River Forth. Little Miss Curious thought for a moment. So what happened to the River First, the River Second and the River Third? She asked. Mr. Clever sighed.

It was going to be a very long day. In his mind he's thinking, God, you're stupid. She's curious. She's not stupid and that's the key to not being stupid is to be curious. Yeah, right. Ask questions and get answers. Now she's with the right guy because he's Mr. Clever and she's Miss Curious.

What a coupling. So the person who had an issue with this said the Mr. Men books are intended for children and it's telling them girls you need to be stupid and men it's your job

to explain things. I must strongly disagree. So she's calling out Mr. Which one is this? Mr. Clever. Mr. Clever for mansplaining. Yeah.

Basically. Mansplaining is where you offer an answer to a question that wasn't asked, though. I just didn't appreciate the sigh, and it's going to be a long day. I didn't appreciate that tone. She's asking someone who's asked valid questions on the show because they didn't appreciate that She's asking a valid As someone who's asked valid questions On the show because I didn't know

It's going to be a long Like when you asked if flamingos are real And Vaughan went They are all pink You can understand the confusion And when have I seen a flamingo Around town Again good point Those birds are amazing You're feeding the pigeons in a flamingo around town? Yeah. Again, good point.

Those birds are amazing. Who would scare the hell out of you if you're feeding the pigeons in a flamingo land? Jesus! It was me when I turned the corner at Auckland Zoo. I was like, shut the front door. Yeah, right. But I didn't need someone to sit there and be like,

it's going to be a long day. Maybe it's just more saying that Mr. Cleaver is just a sassy bitch. Is smarter than her. She's curious though. He knows her by name. Miss Curious. Oh, this is going to be a long day. Lots of questions.

It's like when you're with your kids. And they're like, why? And you're like, well, because blah, blah, blah. Yeah, but why? And you're like, it's going to be a long day. Now, it's not gender dependent. It's the fact that you know more than somebody else and they're asking you a lot of questions.

Right. Also, she's like a young girl with blonde hair and he's like an old man with glasses. And I just don't appreciate it. He's lived a life, Megan. And she's a young, curious... When she grows up, she'll be... Couldn't we have a young, curious boy and a wise woman?

But why is an old man hanging out with a young girl? Why, these questions need to be asked too. Because she's got questions and he's got answers. That's the bigger issue here. I don't know. Has anybody done a background check? Yeah. What's his name?

Mr. Clever. So you think it's fine then? Well, he earned that He might have been Master Curious At some stage But he had all his Questions answered

And she'll grow up to be Ms. Clever Oh my god I want to read the one She's decided that Where Mr. Snow Helps Father Christmas Deliver all the presents

In time for the big day He should have got Mr. Tickle Because all the big long arms Could have gone down the chimney Yeah just down the chimney Tell me more got Mr. Tickle because all the big long arms could have gone down the chimney. Yeah, just down the chimney. Tell me more about Mr. Snow.

Because everybody's got something. Mr. Tickles, Mr. Arpity's like real snobby. Mr. Snow. And he, all of his stories were about him like coming back down to earth. He was an ordinary snowman until he was brought to life to help Father Christmas.

Right. That shows like they really forced the Christmas issue out. Are you guys talking about another book to deflect me from the original issue? To be fair though, these were written, this one was written in 1971.

So it's a different time. But that's not a defence. It was a different time. It's what we've always done. Just let those books go by. It's okay. It's like that dodgy Christmas carol. It's only Vaughan that's...

Somebody said they got given a Peppa Pig book. Peppa goes to the fair. Mama Pig goes to throw balls to win a prize. And the adult animal who's looking after that says, woman are useless at things like this. And then they said they threw the book in the fire. But you've got to keep reading because Mama Pig shows them that they're wrong completely. things like this. But that's... And then they say they threw the book in the fire. Oh, yeah. But you've got to keep reading because Mama Pig shows them that they're wrong completely.

Yeah, right. Like, Mama Pig smokes it and was Peppa the biggest panda that that person has. But she shouldn't have to overcome adversity like that. But in real life, we have to overcome adversity like this every day, Megan. Don't we? As a white male, I can tell you 2019 has been pretty tough.

You're very aware of adversity. Adversity? Adversity. University. It's 14 to 8. Don't get flesh started in here. Don't get flesh started. Don't get flesh started in here. Hey, just before we get to this, this is unrelated. Have you missed Lime Scooters, Megan? They've been taken off the streets of Auckland.

Still in other parts of the country. This isn't unrelated. This is exactly what you want. You're poking the bear. Oh, well, since you've raised your heckles. It's so stupid. So for those that have missed the news, Auckland Council, for whatever reason,

have decided that Lime Scooters, no more. And they're all gone. Have they given a specific reason to this? they're saying that it's safety that safety concerns but yet you don't buy it i don't there's something going on and i feel like there's something behind the scenes maybe they there are some issues right they're not telling i don't know because there will still be e-scooters, Flamingo and some other ones. But at the moment there's a drought in Auckland Central because Flamingo don't

have enough scooters for like another week or so. Right. When they're getting a whole lot in because they've obviously got this news that there's no more Lime. And as a Central Aucklander who uses Limes regularly, you're feeling the pinch of the drought.

I had to walk to work today. The whole way? How long has it been since you've walked all the way to work? Months. I think I walked like two-thirds of the way once when it was raining because there were literally no scooters. Right. And then I found one and I was like, you know what? I'm going to treat myself the last quarter of this walk.

You deserve it. I liked how you walked two thirds of the way but the last quarter you're treating yourself. That mathematically didn't make much sense. I know. Close, but there was a missing period of time there. Yeah. You would have some unaccounted for distance.

I know, but it was so, yeah, it was frustrating. And it's bizarre that, like, why not give Lime another week? Yeah, but you don't know that they haven't already given them heaps of time. It doesn't matter. The people love the Lime scooters. The statistics speak for themselves. They do. How many rides?

Because I got an email the other day from Lime. Yep, and it was like, bajillion rides. Oh, guys. They're so mean. But it had something to do with health and safety, right? So they didn't meet the... They've still got scooters.

We're still allowed to ride e-scooters. Yeah, but they would all have different safety regulations. They're all the same. I actually think Lime was the safest scooter. It was built a little bit more solidly.

Well, the handlebar's a bit taller, and you get a disc brake. The disc brakes were very good. You could do rarkies on them. Well, it was the disc brake at the back. The other ones are all front brake push button, and then you've got to actually stand on the back, like, pedal gutter. No, kind of the mudguard flap thing. Yeah.

To then stop. Yeah, like an ordinary kid's kick scooter. And I reckon the stopping distance on the other one isn't the same. So I don't buy the safety thing either. Everybody who's accidentally ever jammed on a front brake on any sort of two-wheeled vehicle knows that you really come to a mischief. Yeah. When you're using your front brake. On like wet footpaths and lines and stuff.

So it's just something's it's got me rolled up. Like, I don't know. Someone wants to know why you don't just buy an e-scooter. So I always walk home because I go to the supermarket.

I don't want to be that person with an e-scooter in the supermarket. But you live so close to the supermarket you could e-scooter home and then scooter down. No, it's doubling back.

I don't buy it. I don't like that. It's doubling back. Would you say you're somewhat of a hard person to please? Absolutely. I'm very high maintenance and a hard person to please, yes. Right. Okay.

But I just, like, there's no real reason. It's bizarre why the council's done this. Lime scooters in every other city around the country. Yeah. And I'd like to know what part of the health and safety lime scooters didn't meet. Well, I saw something about like not regulating speed, but they all regulate in the city to like 14, 15 k's is the max. And what are they doing with all the lime scooters?

I'll buy one. Yeah, I was going to say, because you could buy the charging cable, pull all the stickers off, disable the... Yeah, but then they keep beeping at your house because they'd be trying to find it. Get that? I don't know who could disable that. Someone must know.

You're certainly not encouraging people to steal them, Vaughn. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You were saying buy one. I'm saying if they have them for sale, imagine going to that. It's like, you know, every area has, every city has an area where they sell cars. Like in Auckland, it's the Ellerslie race course. And you go and you're like, yeah, it's not a bad car. Imagine walking into a warehouse and there's thousands of Lime scooters

and you've got to walk around looking for the one that you wanted. I'd get one that still has a bell on it and less scratches. And less scratches, yeah. And all of the grip pad on the bottom still like mint. Because that stuff gets scuffed up pretty quick. I wouldn't want to buy one and then later found out it had a dunk on the viaduct as well. That's the price you take. That's why you always get an AA certified check before you buy any vehicle.

Pre-owned vehicle. Or a lime scooter. I don't know. But yeah, you got me started. You happy? Yep. Fleshfarner Megan. the podcast, ZM. I mentioned this to Megan when I got to work this morning.

And I just never really thought anything about it, but we thought maybe we should bring this up and talk about it. Because I have kind of a stranger friend, I guess, that I talk to every morning, but I know nothing about. Nothing. Name? Not, but this is what I said to Megan this morning. I'm pretty sure he said my name this morning.

And I was like, how does he know my name? So what's the scenario? Is it in the same place every day? Well, it changes. So every day when I line to work or now walk, because of the Auckland Council, as previously heard in Don't Get Me Started segment only 10 minutes ago, I'll be scooting down, and every morning,

this man has noise-cancelling headphones some days, most days, and he's power walking through the inner city. It's like his morning exercise. Even when it's raining, I would say 90% of the time this year, I have seen him. And every morning, I'll take one handle off the Lime Scooter, risking my own safety to give him a morning. And he'll say, good morning. And maybe there'll be a comment of the weather.

Yesterday, when I was on a Flamingo Scooter, he did say, I see you've had to change scooters. So there's a, like, decent way to chat. Well, as I'm, like, driving past, I'm like, yeah, good morning. Or I'll be like, happy it's Friday. Or, oh, it's Monday. Oh, it's Wednesday, hump day. You know, in passing, those kind of comments. Yeah.

But I know literally nothing about this guy other than that he power walks every morning around the Auckland CBD on my way to work. But we always say, and I'm pretty sure he said my name this morning. My first name. Wow. Not my nickname. But he might have been saying something else. It's very hard because I'm partially deaf because of years working in radio.

And it might be another name. I don't know. Weird though, eh? Kind of cute. Yeah. Do you gauge whether you're late or not depending on where you're about to see him? No, because he really mixes up his walk. If it was me, I'd go the same way every time. Yeah.

Because I do. But he'll, some mornings be at different parts or I might see him down the road. But I don't say hi if he's walking the other way. Right. But yeah, I've got a stranger that I talk to every day and I know nothing about. To you guys? This is what I wanted to ask this morning. I see a stranger walking in the middle of the road every morning in like high-vis at

4.30. Give them a nudge. Oh, they're in high-vis. A nudge. And then when I approach, he goes to the side, and then when I go past, he walks in the middle of the road again. But do you have a wave? Get a wee wave. And then when I approach, he goes to the side. And then when I go past, he walks in the middle of the road again. But do you have a wave? Yeah, do we wave?

I started, because originally I was scared of him, because it was a bit like, I don't know, like walking in the middle of the road. But no, I don't know his name, but we wave. And that's about it. I'm always just like, why are you walking at 4.30 in the morning? Does he still carry his axe? You never know when you're going to come across a different road.

Don't start the axe. I've only just gotten over the fear that he's going to chase me down. I'm going to get up early. I'm going to buy him a clown mask. Oh, my God. I'll be like, pop this on on your walk. Oh, no way. And that's when Megan gets done for hitting someone with their car

because she's freaking out and doesn't turn up at work. Yeah. But I don't know. We just go about our lives, don't we? We might go to the same coffee shop every day, but we don't talk to people apart from, hello, and that's it. We're just like little ants crawling around, and we, like, pass so many people, but we never interact.

But you do, like, you know, you do see them, and you do acknowledge them, because you're like, oh, there's morning walk guy. Hello. But that's it. Yeah. It's weird, eh? It is weird. Stranger friends. Stranger friends. Hello. But that's it. Yeah. It's weird, eh? It is weird.

Stranger friends. Stranger friends. So I wanted to ask this morning, do you have strangers, stranger friends, that you talk to every day but you know nothing about? Yeah.

Because I've given this guy a backstory. It always changes. What's his latest backstory? Why is he walking? Yeah, why is he walking? Yeah, I don't know. Well, you said you gave him a backstory. No, I don't want to say because it's like, the latest story is he walking? Yeah, I don't know. You said you gave him a backstory. I am asking you about the backstory.

The latest story is real sad and like, I don't know. He's just, yeah, I don't know. What, like he lost his wife or something? Yeah, like he's lost his wife and so he's up every morning because she used to get up every morning. And now he's walking because she's not there. Oh my God.

Also, she's dead. He doesn't stop and talk to him. He needs a friend. I thought you meant he's just lost her, so he's out looking for her. That too, that too. No, I don't know. Susan! But, yeah, no, that's the thing. You do make up these stories and give that.

So 0800-DONALDZM-9696. I don't know. Am I alone in this? Does anyone else have, like, stranger friends that they see every day and literally you know nothing about them? But you do give them a hello. Talking about stranger friends, those that they see every day and literally you know nothing about them, but you do give them a hello. Talking about stranger friends, those people you see every day,

you don't know anything about them, but you give them a hello. Like my morning walk guy when I go to work. Didn't see him this morning. When you don't see him, are you like, are you worried about him? No, because he'll pop up. How old a guy is he?

I don't know. I don't want to say. Yeah, like maybe. Jesus, you see him every day. Have a shot, mate. Yeah, but no, because this is the thing. Now I I don't know. I don't want to say. Yeah, like maybe. Jesus, you see him every day. Have a shot, mate. Yeah, but no, because this is the thing. Now I'm talking about him.

I don't want to see him tomorrow because it'll be like, what if he hears that, yeah, let's say middle-aged. You haven't said anything bad about him. I know, but what if he hears that I've been talking about him? He might give you his actual backstory.

But then I've got to stop. I've got to get to work. Yeah, then you've got to talk to him. And then every day our friendship's going to become greater or I'll have to put more effort in. Guy, if you're listening, Fletch doesn't like people on a whole. Just

shoot him tiny bits of information every time you see him from now on. Just a year, yeah. Maybe your star sign tomorrow. But also get it all done before the end of next week because that's when Fletch goes on holiday. How many days would you not see him before you worried? Well, there was a time where he was away for maybe two weeks

and I thought maybe he was on a cruise overseas. In my head, I was like, oh my God, he's probably on a cruise with his wife. It seems like the cruise type. Yeah. So you think there is a wife? Is there a wedding ring? I don't know. I can't remember.

That's your task for tomorrow. I'll have a look for a wedding ring. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, good call. Because he might take it off all the exercises. And I'm also imagining, like, does he have a shower at his workplace after he does his big walk? Oh, so he's walking to work. Or does he work in the city or does he just live in the city and then goes to work?

Is he wearing active wear? Yeah, he's active wear, track pants and stuff, that kind of active, yep. Yeah, okay. So I don't know, but every morning, so we want to know from you, who are your stranger friends, the people you see every day but you know nothing about, and a lot of text messages. I take the Nescafe pods to a florist near the office because they recycle them. Okay. Stranger friends, the people you see every day but you know nothing about. And a lot of text messages. I take the Nescafe pods to a florist near the office because they recycle them. Okay.

I know there are two cool, lovely girls who work there and I really want to be their friend. But at the moment, I'm nothing more than a stranger friend. Oh, I know. I don't know how to take the next step either because, yeah, sometimes you meet people at like places where you get services or whatever and you're like, man, they're cool. Just hard-making adult friends. Linger a bit. Yeah. And once you've seen them a few times, how do you're like, man, they're cool. Just hard-making adult friends. Linger a bit. Yeah. And once you've seen them a few times,

how do you go, actually, my name's Megan. Yeah, can we be friends? Because we've already seen each other. I do a little bit of research like on flowers in this situation with the florists and you could say something like,

is this a peony? And find out what's in season. Yeah. Peonies. What? Peonies. What? Peonies. And see, that's the conversation starter because I called them a peony

completely incorrectly. Coming into season at the moment. They are. Lovely. Claire, you've got a stranger friend? Yeah, hi. Hi. When my kids were little,

I used to go to pack and save all the time and me and the security guard would always make chit-chat. And then one day I was leaving, and my two-year-old had never said this to anyone and said, bye, love you. Oh. To the security guard.

To the security guard. And not to you, his mother. Never said it to anyone before, and he said it to him. Oh. Did he say why? He just really... No, he just said bye, I love you. We said bye every day and he decided that day

to say love you. Love you. That is so cute. Claire, thanks for your call. Lisa, you have a stranger friend? Yes, she walks past my house every day and I know that if she's already walked past then I'm late. Oh, okay, right. You don't know anything about her?

Do you wave and say hello? I actually think she might be, like, homeless. I'm not sure, because sometimes she pushes a supermarket trolley and the first time I saw her, I was going to say, hey, you know what, you're not supposed to bring those home. But I realised, like, all this stuff is in her and I thought, okay, should it be? But, yeah, she's really nice, but she's really overenthusiastic.

Like, I just go, oh, morning, and she goes, oh, morning, how's it going? Like, as if she doesn't speak to anyone either. She just has a yarn with you. Wow. So she's really nice. Are you sure, Lisey, you sure she's not just taking her shopping home and the trolley? Well, she's got, like, blankets and, like, stuff in there, like, her stuff.

You know, like, her things, not, like, groceries. Yeah. Interesting. But. Right. But really nice. She's really nice. She might have a great story to tell. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, Lisa, thanks.

You call some text messages. I used to go past the house every day on my way home from work, and around about the same time I'd go past, there was always this really rough-looking guy just getting home, and he would greet his dog with big hugs and kisses, and it was pretty adorable. And he became known as Man and Dog in my house. One day I went past and to my delight, Man and Dog had another dog. So he became Man and Dog and Dog.

Here's the kicker. I went past and the house was empty and they had moved and I still wonder, what happened to Man and Dog and Dog? Oh! What happened to Man and dog and dog? Oh! What happened to man and dog and dog? They never talked to man and dog and dog. Well, if you're a man with a dog and a dog, just text them and let them know you're okay. Yes, that would be great.

And obviously if you look rough. Imagine if you've got another dog. It'd be man and dog and dog and dog. It would work. I walk my dog every morning. I often stop and talk to another lady walking her dog. Her dog's name is Flash, but I do not know what her name is. But if you were chatting every day, wouldn't you get to know their name?

But no, you just don't want to know, eh? But also, yeah, once you see them every day, it seems weird now to be like, what's your name, actually? Yeah, get some details. Somebody said, I've got a stranger friend. I park on a residential street every day. And there's approximately, they've even used the tilde to indicate approximately,

which I think is lovely use of the tilde. Is that the squiggly line thing on the side? Yeah, under escape. That looks like an S, but it's on the side. Okay. A 70-year-old man, approximately, he sees me coming and he'll walk out onto the side of the road and help me parallel park. He has a big moustache, glasses, and to be totally honest,

a bit of a serial semi-killer look to him. Right. Semi-serial killer, not a serial semi-killer. Right, but there's three. A serial semi-killer look to them. Right. Semi-serial killer, not a serial semi-killer. Right, but a serial semi-killer is something totally different. Yeah, that really ruins the mood. You're just getting in the mood and then someone's like, hi, and you're like, well, that's gone now. Hmm.

Yeah, lots of people with stranger friends. It is a sonder. The feeling you're experiencing, Fletch, is called a sonder. It's a realisation that each random stranger is living a life as vivid and as complex as your own. Wow, that's deep. Populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness.

But I think living in the city, you do see that a lot more because you just see everyone just in their own little, you know, space and you're just like, yep. Yep. It's getting very deep. Somebody basically said you've described university campus life. You walk past people at the same time, the same day. You're like, hey.

It's just, hey. And you don't know who they are or where they're going or what happened to them. Or what even they're studying. Yeah. Wow. Life. It's crazy. Life.

We're all here, aren't we? All life. We go around. All life. We come around. All life. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about the Christmas movie, the classic Christmas movie, The Santa Clause, starring Tim Allen. Okay.

You'll be familiar with the movie. Santa falls off Tim Allen's character's roof. Dies. Grim start to a Christmas movie. And Tim Allen, I think he puts on the hat or does something and thinks it's a joke. Or he signs I think he signs the contract

and then he inherits the powers of St. Nicholas, Santa Claus. Now in that movie, the original, in the theatres, you won't find it now, the character Tim Allen plays looks at a phone number and says out loud, 1-800-SPANK-ME.

I know that number. Does it? Does that happen in the movie? Wow. Okay. 1-800-SPANK-ME. I know that number. So that never made it to the VHS release

or anything that makes it to television now because after seeing that movie a kid went home and called the number. Wow. And it was the number of an active sex hotline and there was a $400 phone bill that a parent wanted repaid.

It was paid for by the movie company and thusly removed from any future edits. What were they thinking using like an active number? Because that's why numbers in movies always start with 555 because that's not an area code in America. Yes.

So they can literally have any number being read out as long as it starts with 555 and it's not a number. And it got me thinking about 0900 numbers here in New Zealand. That used to be a thing, eh? Remember 0900 numbers? Oh, yeah. They were fine numbers like that. You could ring before the internet and acquire certain services.

But it was also just like advice. Horoscopes. Horoscopes. All of these. And they were always advertised 0900 numbers. And I wondered, do they even have them anymore? They were like, they'd be like, oh, ring up for your horoscope. It's $4.99 a minute.

Yeah. And then they'd get you on the phone and it would take them 10 minutes to read out your crap. No. It was, no, no, no. It wasn't like that. It was like, press the number or something on the keypad to get yours. So you'd have to be like, press one for Pisces. Press two for Aries,

because we called one from my friend's mum's place once, and she hit the riff. Good Lord. Especially because it was horoscopes and she was a religious lady. Right. It was a double whammy.

Yeah. But it could have been worse. It was up. Oh, can you believe it? Yeah, totally. So I went to spark.co.nz, show sponsor, but, you know, that's not why I went to spark.co.nz show sponsor but, you know, that's not

why I'm doing this. And I was like, do they still exist? And you can still get an 0900 number. That's weird because you never see them advertised, do you? No, never. Like, 0800 numbers are still very well known. Anya, you're not here. Great. Where is she?

Georgia, you're pretty... She might be going to the toilet. How old are you, Georgia? You're a... I mean, don't rush. Don't rush, Georgia. I'm sorry. I haven't even started work yet.

Why am I even here? How old are you? 25. Have you heard of 0900 numbers? 0900? Yeah. No, that's really old. I thought it was saying that.

Because it was pre-internet. 800 is free. Oh, 900 costs. Oh, 800 costs you to have. Like, if you had an 0800 number,

you pay for the calls. Like, we pay for when you call. The internet gives you everything 0900 numbers. Exactly. So there's really no point. But you can still get one.

Like, who would have one? Okay. Okay. Nice. Yeah. She can know 900 number. Just see how many fools will call it. Oh, damn it. I've called them fools.

They're not going to call now. Anyway. Something to look into. If you're looking to run some sort of scam, like selling your pyramid scheme essential oils or something. So today's fact of the day is in the Santa Claus movie, there was a number read out, 1-800-SPANK-ME, which was an actual phone sex number.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. This is why. Fat. This is why. Fat. This is why. This is why. This is why. Fat.

Ha! Not on board with this. Usually, no questions you're on are totally on board. However, Smith's crisps. They're the chips. The Australian chips. When you go to Australia, that's all they have in their chip aisle. They love However, Smith's crisps. They're the chips. The Australian chip. When you go to Australia, that's all they have in their chip aisle. They love a Smith's.

They don't do a Bluebirds, eh? Not really. They love their, kind of, they like kettle. No. How would you? Describe Smith's. Not crinkle. They're not crinkles.

They're those slim cut. Yeah. They're like slim cut chip. Yep. They're good though. So they're making a Lamington flavoured one. I'll get it right out there right now. They're making a lamington flavoured one.

A chocolate flavoured lamington chip. Now, as disgusting as that sounds, because, you know, I love lamingtons. If anybody's coming over from Australia in the next little while, you would try it. Mule some back for me. Because I would love to just try this. Would you? Because listen,

it's taken a quintessentially Australian cake, which I would beg to differ, and put it with Australia's favourite potato chip. In our Lamington chip, you will find hints of flavours including chocolate, coconut, cream and butter. Which is interesting because individually each of those things can be used in savoury cooking, but together

Yeah, it's odd, isn't it? Because there's no sweet and sour, is there? It's all just sweet. Will there be salt on there? Will it be a salted lamington? Because that could taste alright. Maybe. I also haven't tried their Peking duck, but I'd imagine that would be a lovely duck-flavoured.

Isn't there a Peking duck-flavoured chip in New Zealand? Is there? Yeah. With a bit of hoist, that sounded like I was eating a chip. A whale. You know, I think it was one of those fancy ones. Uppercuts? I want to say uppercuts.

You want to say uppercuts? You want to say a duck-flavoured uppercut? Okay. An uppercut. Well, we don't know. I've never realised an uppercut is the same as like the punch. Yes, uppercuts. I was right.

The Peking duck. Peking duck. Oh, delicious. Oh, my God, that sounds pretty good. I'm on board with that. But, yeah, this Lamington flavoured chicken, I thought it was a prank, but I'm looking more into it. That sounds pretty good. I'm on board with that. But yeah, this lamington flavour chip, I thought it was a prank, but I'm looking more into it. And it might be a publicity stunt,

but it is actually happening January 1st. It's going into select stores in Australia. So yeah, it's not out yet. Oh, well, if anybody's coming over, mule some back in the new year. I just want, just to say I've tried it because that fascinates me, that flavour. Oh yeah, you don't want to tell the grandkids one day

you missed out on trying a lamington chip. Our stories for our grandkids is getting so much worse than our grandparents' stories. Yeah, like, oh, I took a bullet in World War II. God, I missed out on lamington chips. The state of it. My granddad had a story about how his uncle had a sock with an explosive inside it.

No, well, maybe. No, but, and he dipped it in tar and he had to jam with an explosive inside it. No, well, maybe. No, but, and he dipped it in tar and he had to jam it in a tank track. Are you sure? No, you were just watching Saving Private Ryan. Yes, my granddad's.

Was he lying to me? He said, I think he saw that on Saving Private Ryan. He's like, that was pretty cool. No, because apparently it was done. And it was like a New Zealand desert job. Oh, okay.

Hide in the sand, jump up on the tracks. Yeah, right. Shoot the Germans. Brilliant. Okay, you write our stories a lot later now. This is why. Fact. This is why.

Fact. This is why. This is why. This is why. Fact. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Addictionary.com has, what? Addictionary.com. Fat. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Addictionary.com has, what?

Dictionary.com. Yeah, why are you doing them weird voices? Addictionary.com has announced its word of the year. So this isn't a new word. This is a word that they like. That they said has been searched a lot on their website where people have heard it maybe and they'll be like, what is the actual definition of existential?

Okay. Because, you know, like people use words. It was like years ago, audacity. You've got the sheer audacity of it. Now, lots of people were saying audacity and I was like, yeah, it's a cool word to say, but I don't know if I'm going to be saying it right. So I had to Google at what point

it could be used. There's always words like that. I know that I'm using the right word. It's the right word. But like when you ask me to explain what it means, I'm always like, well, you know, it just means that, doesn't it? It means that. I don't know how to be writing the dictionary. You're not allowed to use the word in the description of the word.

Yeah. Because I don't know how to explain audacity. How do you describe wet? Moist. It has a liquid texture. I don't know. This is how audacity is defined. A willingness to take bold risks or a rude or disrespectful behaviour.

Yeah, but it was a rude or disrespectful behaviour. Yeah, but it was mostly in rude and disrespectful behaviour that it was being used. The sheer audacity. Yeah. Megan, the sheer audacity of you is something I say to you a lot when you roast me. The sheer audacity.

So existential is 2019's word of the year. Existential crisis. Yeah, that's how I hear that word used. So existential is 2019's word of the year. Existential crisis. Yeah, that's how I hear that word used. So what does it exactly mean? The definition of existential is of relating to or affirming existence. Grounded in existence or the experience of existence. So if you were having an existential crisis, you would be having a crisis of your existence.

What does it mean? Why am I here? That's what happens when I watch space things. You realise how insignificant we are. And I think a lot of people googling the definition of this word after things like mass shootings that we've had a lot of this year in the world and even here in New Zealand. So they said it peaked after the wildfires, Hurricane Dorian, the mass shootings in Christchurch

and El Paso in Texas, and it also popped up in politics and apparently Forky the white plastic spork from Toy Story 4 was having an existential crisis. He was, because he couldn't get over the fact he was trash. Yeah, and his existence. And so parents would be trying to explain to their children an existential crisis. You have to Google that.

Tell you what, though, for Christmas, Sporky is so great if you need to buy something for the kids. You just go and buy a pack of 10. And then put eyeballs on it. Say it's official Toy Story merchandise. Oh, bye-bye, there's nothing on your door. I know. Money. They won't know. The kids bye-bye. There's nothing on your door. I know. Money.

They won't know. The kids are like five. They will because you've set up that stall at the Otara markets, haven't you? You couldn't be stopped making your sporkies. I have. Your forkies. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

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