ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - December 11 2018

Episode Date: December 10, 2018

The final of our Festive Film Fight, the most popular day to get engaged is coming up and Megan had a proud Mum moment.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello and welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, brought to you by Spark. Get the new Nokia 7.1 from $499 on a Spark prepaid rollover value pack. And now, on with the podcast. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Good morning. This cash at the campground, aren't you? Was it in one big pile or just tucked in? No, it was tucked in various spots and everyone came out on Saturday morning and were like,

oh yeah. Under windscreen wipers and tent zips. That's got to be stolen money. The police are saying that if anybody's had the cash amount stolen to come forward, but then also people who deal in that amount of cash probably aren't going to come forward. They'll be like, oh, yeah, so I deal drugs. Predominantly I deal in cash. Yeah.

So I don't pay any tax on this illegal transaction. And, yeah, I have lost a whole lot of money, so thanks. Yeah, that's not happening, is it? No. No. No, it's not. But if nobody comes forward, they'll just happening, is it? No. No. No. It's not. But if nobody comes forward,

they'll just get to keep it. Yep. How long do you have to wait for though? It's a while, like, for a couple of months or something. So that's boring. So you can't spend it for Christmas.

So I just would have been like, oh, do they have any money on your windscreen wiper? I would have been like, nah. I'd just spend it and be like,

didn't say a thing. I don't know what you're talking about. Or just an IOU to the police and be like, look, I'm going to spend it and be like didn't say a thing I don't know what you're talking about or just an IOU to the police and be like look I'm gonna spend it and if they come forward IOU

but if they don't I will have just spent the money I was gonna spend anyway ahead of Christmas it's too hard to google I was trying to google how long you have to wait

to get your cash back I feel like it's 90 days I feel like everything's 90 days I just feel like if you say 90 days for something, people will be like, that seems about right. Yeah. Like holding on to money that could be stolen or...

Whether you're going to get fired from your job. Firing someone because they'd rubbish at the job you hired them to do. Those sorts of things. 90 days. Sure. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. Story time.

I've got three news headlines for three stories that I've found that are interesting, unusual, odd, quirky. Headline one. Vaughn and Megan pick one of the following three. Headline one. Tane shoots herself in the foot. Megan, listen to all three, please, and don't be silly. Take this seriously, please.

Okay. You get a bit silly when you know Christmas is coming up, don't you? I know. Because you'll be on holidays soon. I do. Headline two, mom cancels baby shower. And headline three, woman loses her boo. I think I know woman loses her boo.

Because he went boo. Boo. It's this woman who married a 300-year-old ghost, a pirate ghost. She announced yesterday they divorced. We talked about her, right? Yeah, she... Yeah. Aw, did he cheat on her?

Jack, the Haitian pirate, and Amanda got married earlier this year or last year? I forget when we talked about it. I feel like earlier this year, last year, yeah. Yeah, earlier this year or last year? I forget when we talked about it. I feel like earlier this year, last year, yeah. Yeah, earlier this year. Here's the best line of the story when I was reading it. She said, I feel it's time to let everyone know that my marriage is over. I'll explain all in due course,

but for now, all I want to say is be very careful when dabbling in spirituality. It's not something to mess with. The split is another blow for Jack after he was reportedly executed for thieving on the high seas in the 1700s. It's brilliant. The Irish post. You can just imagine he's like, oh, stupid bitch. The split's another blow for Jack.

How good. Brilliant. Apparently she just blow for Jack. How good. Brilliant. Apparently she just really likes pirates. Yeah, right. Look at her. In her wedding dress next to a flag.

Yeah. A pirate flag. Oh my goodness me. She was happy. Well, she was, Megan. Whatever tickles your fancy. Well, for that small amount of time

that she was married to a 300-year-old ghost pirate, she was happy. Okay, well, for that small amount of time that she was married to a 300-year-old ghost pirate, she was happy. Okay, so that leaves story one or two. Teen shoots herself in the foot or mom cancels baby shower. I kind of feel like two because even though I said number one, I was being silly, I feel like that's kind of already, she's just shot herself in the foot, hasn't she?

Yeah, I reckon go baby shower. Okay, well, we go now to Middle America, and this was shared on Reddit and has now gone viral. A woman has gone viral for allegedly cancelling her baby shower because her family and friends were unsupportive of her choice of baby name. Squire Sebastian Senator. Oh, my God. That's like Squire Sebastian.

Okay. Squire Senator is two positions. Like Senator is an elected official and Squire is what's Squire? Squire is like a name. Oh, yeah. I don't know. Is it a royal, like a military ranking kind of thing? A squire is a man of high social standing

who owns and lives on an estate in a rural area, especially the chief landowner in such an area. This is a long Facebook post. I'll just run through some of the highlights. This is what she posted to cancel her baby shower. Dear members of the Squire Sebastian Senator baby shower, I'm going to have to hold my laptop up. It's tiny writing.

I have a really important announcement to make. It brings me pain to have to tell you this, but I'm cancelling the event. I will text you soon. If you're invited to my smaller, more inclusive party, at least here, no one will judge me.

Why? Why am I doing this? Because you've all been talking shit about my unborn baby. An unborn child. How can you judge an unborn child? What is wrong with you? No, I think they're judging you. To say this frankly, my friends and

family have treated me like total shite. They've spread rumours and lies about my child. No, I'm not crazy. No, I'm not mentally unstable. No. No, I was not drunk when I named my child. His name is Squire Sebastian Senator. That is it. You cannot force me to change his name.

It goes on and on and on to say my baby's name will be a revolution. It will push people to question everything. Why name your baby something boring like Joshua, Brian, Sam, Nick, Mark, Bella, Marina, etc. when you can name it something special? Because kids get teased about enough in life without having their name on the list leading the charge. Squire Sebastian Senator will live a powerful, wholesome life. His confidence will not diminish

simply because his name is out of the ordinary. Instead, he will be extraordinary. If you all fake-ass family, you won't get to be a part of my baby's life and it's all because you had to judge him. My gosh. She's getting that all mixed up. They're judging you.

Yeah. You wouldn't be able to name him that in New Zealand, would you? Squire or Senator. Because it's a title. Yeah. Certain titles you're not allowed. But they're not titles recognised. But then, I don't know, because do we have jukes?

But you're not allowed to call your kid a juke. Isn't a senator a carb type? Isn't it a Holden? A Holden senator. A Holden senator? Yeah, true. But that's just in Australia and New Zealand. I don't think that's in the States.

So, I mean, there's a high chance in Australia and New Zealand there's already quite a few senators. FM. I'm so lucky that I don't sleep with a snorer. Unless, like, I think I snore if I'm not feeling very well because you're, like, congested. And my husband's the same. I think that's the only think I snore if I'm not feeling very well because you're like congested and my husband's the same. I think that's the only time I snore.

Yeah. But my dad is a real bad snorer. Mum like sleeps in another bed sometimes. What did the old mates do that made them... I don't know. I don't think he always snored either. Too much pick in your nose, is it?

Yeah. It just kind of caves in. Are you a snorer, Fletch? Nah. Unless I'm drunk, maybe. Yeah, right. Might have it. Just if you've got a cold, you might get all clogged up.

Must be so hard to sleep with a snorer. Except now there is potentially, because there's lots of little things, there's clips on the nose that you can do, right, that opens up your airways. Now there is apparently a hormone spray that could stop people snoring by regulating breathing. So you literally just spray this up the nose and it can treat not only just snoring but like

sleep apnea. Right. For people who have to wear masks. How much does this cost? Because remember when Intern Anya kept us all up at the Airbnb with her big snoring? She was sick. I feel attacked. Do you snore like that when you're not sick? No, I was like two days into the worst

cold ever. I don't normally snore. Like I could hear it through the wall and you were down the hallway. You've been a bitch. See, Megan was like less than a metre away and she's not even complaining about it. It really speaks volumes about your character, Magoos. You didn't hear her complain the next day.

That's fine, as long as she's behind my back. She didn't have nice things to say about you. Oh, don't say that. No, she wasn't well. It was, yeah. Right. So how much have they said this spray is? Or it's just kind of being developed?

It's being developed at the moment. Right. But yeah, literally you're just going to have to spray it up your nose. That'll be nice. Like when you've got a cold, you get... Otriven. Is that what it's called?

Just like an Otriven. Right. But then you can't use that for more than three days in a row, eh? Otriven. Yeah. Yeah, I used that pretty much an entire winter

and it melted whatever's up your nose. Yeah. And then I, for years, got just really bad sinus infections every time I got a cold, pretty much. You've got to read the label and you say it's directed. Yeah, well, I did not read the label. I did not. Please see your doctor.

Well, I had to go see the doctor. At the end of it, everything was melting out my nose. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Hello there. Apparently Brexit could be cancelled. I don't know, man.

After all this. I don't know, man. This whole thing. Whose idea was this? I don't know. But it's a lookalike. But apparently it can be even at this late stage in the game because it's been far more complicated than they ever let on or thought.

There's three options and one of them is just to cancel it altogether. Fine. You've ruined it. Cancel it. If it was me that had to admit I was wrong and cancel it, I'd make it the other person's fault. Yeah. I'd be like, we tried our best.

You put roadblocks at every stage. You ruined this. It's cancelled. I hope you're happy. Nope. No questions. That's how I handle things. Yeah.

So while they're cancelling it, these are the top six things Britain should cancel while they're cancelling Brexit. Number six on the list, licorice all sorts. I did not know the British are responsible for licorice all sorts, but yuck. What do you have against licorice all sorts? Disgusting.

Well, I hate licorice. Right. It's filth. against licorice all sorts? Well, I hate licorice. Right. It's filth. But licorice all sorts. The pink and the coloured bits tone down the licorice. Not enough. Get rid of the licorice then and just eat the... Have you ever eaten the bits?

What about the... You know those ones? Are they RJs? And they've got like a red and then in the middle is like white chocolate and milk chocolate. Oh my God, they're so yum. Well, just read the... Do you not like... I was going to eat lollies. I had to God, they're so yum. Do you not like that?

I was going to eat lollies. I had to eat something I liked. I even read licorices. Oh, are you kidding me? Read licorices is the best. But read licorices isn't even licorice. That's like saying white chocolate's chocolate. It is chocolate.

It says licorice on the packet. I don't think that. The only thing that's got in common is the texture, but none of the original ingredients, right? But licorice, yuck. And licorice all sorts, you're the worst because as a child you lured me in with the bright colours and then you st, right? But licorice, yuck. And licorice all sorts, you're the worst. Because as a child, you lured me in with the bright colours. And then you stung me with the licorice.

Yeah. And Nan loved them. She always had licorice all sorts. Yeah, because she knew you. Can you say licorice all sorts? Licorice all sorts. There you go. Licorice all sorts.

I'll say it three times. Licorice all sorts. Nah. Licorice all sorts. Licorice all sorts. Licorice all. Nah. She only had them because she knew you wouldn't eat them.

Oh, yeah, probably. That's how totally we would have cleaned out the lolly jar otherwise. She's like, here are the tubby little kids again. Into my lollies. Get out the gross lollies. Hide the nice ones. Number five on the list of the top six things Britain should cancel along with cancelling Brexit.

Katie Hopkins and Piers Morgan. Oh, yes. Piers. Piers or Piers? Piers. Piers. Who cares? Piers Morgan. Oh, yes. Piers or Piers? Two toxic people. Who cares? Piers, he's a dick. But they know.

They just know how to rile people up. Oh, yeah, they do. We don't need to in this day and age. Sit down. Take away their grandstand. Yeah. Especially her and him. Both of them.

See? Number four on the list of the top six things Britain should cancel along with Brexit, Coronation Street. But just to get old people wound up and then uncancel it after a few weeks. Paul, that is terrible. And it's not just old people. We know young people that are into Coro Street. I know, I know.

They get wound up too. Just basically a little bit of a tease. Because they're probably taking Coro for granted. They think it'll be around forever. Yeah, true. They just need a reminder that nothing's forever. Not even the rovers in. Number three on the list of the top six things Britain should cancel along with Brexit.

Liking tea so much. Have they had a coffee? It's the far superior hot beverage. I haven't had mine yet. That's why I'm slurring and stuff. Mine's a mess today too because I went to put a little bit more hot water in from the hot water tap and heaps went in and it overflowed

and I was in a hurry to get back in for this and so I've got handy towels wrapped around it. Why is it all bubbly on the top? I think you've got detergent in there. I don't know. Okay. I put the coffee in and then some water and then when I put the boiling water in on top,

it goes a bit like that. Okay. I don't know. Delicious. It looks like there's still some dishwashing liquid left in there. No, no. I think if you have milk

that's hidden. But when you have a black coffee Yeah, right. the bubbly bits show. I also stir very aggressively. Okay. In depth. Tea.

Not as good. In depth. Number two on the list of the top six things Britain should cancel along with Brexit is having actors so good at American accents that you always forget they're British. I know.

Charlie Hunnam. Always forget he's British. Andrew Selma. Hugh Laurie. I kind of don't forget he's British because I knew he was before House. I'm not trying to sound like a Hugh Laurie hipster or whatever, but he was so good at that accent. You forget Andrew Garfield, that guy that did the Spider-Man thing. You always forget he's British.

No, is he? He's British. Yeah, Andrew Garfield's British. I had no idea. And you know the guy that played Kick-Ass in the Kick-Ass movies? No, he's not British. Yeah, he's English. And he's married to a way older woman.

Yeah, that's why I like him. Andrew Lincoln. Rick Grimes, or you'd know him as the guy that holds the signs at the door in Love Actually. Oh, yeah. He's British, but because of The Walking Dead, everyone forgets and thinks he's American. Huh. No idea. Oh, my God, he's in The Walking Dead.

Another guy that was in Love Actually is, I always say his name wrong, I'm so sorry, Shewelton Ojafore. He was in 12 Years is, I always say his name wrong. I'm so sorry. Shewelton Ojafore. He was in 12 Years a Slave as well. He played an American slave. He's British. You always forget about him. Gillian Anderson.

Yep. From The X-Files. British. Lots of people. Good actors. Just toning it down a bit. And the number one thing Britain should cancel along with Brexit is every stupid

British reality show the only way is Essex Love Island yeah that can be gone I'm happily sitting the arse into that one what's the other one

Chelsea Made in Chelsea Geordie Shore but you're forgetting all these shows keep your wife busy while you can play PlayStation

but sometimes I want attention Geordie Shore. But you're forgetting all these shows keep your wife busy while you can play PlayStation. Yeah, I know. But sometimes I want attention. And a cuddle before bed, but no. Okay. Because of Love Island. That's today's top six. F.M. Fletch particularly loves the Christmas candles that Akoya put out,

the pine one. Oh, yep. I've got one I've yet to light it this year. I've got all kinds of scented candles. Yeah, me too. Actually, Vaughn, they sound like I don't enjoy a scented candle. You know you do with a bath, right? Oh, any time.

Yeah, any time. Any time. My mother-in-law, I wear and then date her with them because my mother-in-law got into making a bit of candle. Oh, yeah. And one of her many fads. How do you, I was going to say, is that like a lot of effort making candles?

She made soaps. Oh, yeah. She's got all the gear and stuff. She'll probably do another round soon. She gets into it about once a year. I used to collect candles when I was little. Like all different shapes and sizes and weird. But they were never seen today when we were kids.

The scented candle's an invention of the last 10 years. Yeah. Yeah. That's a big business now. Huge business. Well, we may be doing ourselves more harm than good by lighting candles. So, it's, this

report says that candles let off volatile organic compounds, VOCs, that become vapors or gases, and then we breathe them in. And it's particularly bad. I know, it's particularly bad for asthmatics. That's me. That's me.

That's me. It can trigger asthma in children and worsen it in adults. And it raises the risk of heart disease. Also, it says that candles let off formaldehyde when they burn, which is classified as a carcinogen.

All candles? Yeah, it says that's a long-term thing. Right. But then that sounds like cheap candles. And also, like, if you've got the door open, you know? Yeah. Get the airflow moving. But do you ever find scented candles trigger your asthma?

Nah. See, it's a load of... People just love to panic. It's a load of rubbish. No. Look, your room smells like vanilla and coconut. It's great. There's nothing wrong with it. Okay, so formaldehyde is found in smoke of rubbish. No. Look, your room smells like vanilla and coconut. It's great. There's nothing wrong with it.

Okay, so formaldehyde is found in smoke full stop. Right. Any smoke. Smoke forest fires, automobile, exhaust, tobacco smoke, anywhere where there is smoke. If your candle is smoking, you need to trim your wick. Trim your wick. Always trim your wick.

Trim your wick. I've got a wick trimmer too. It's a flash little, it's like a long pair of scissors and at the end it changes angle. Akoya sent me a candle wick. I've got a wick trimmer too. It's a flash little, it's like a long pair of scissors and at the end it changes angle. Akoya sent me a candle wick. I haven't used it to trim any candles. I've used it for like other stuff. Like what?

Cutting stringers and stuff. No, don't. I know, I'm going to blunt my wick candle, my wick scissors. I always use things for the not intended purpose. Yeah, right. Okay. Right. Yeah, nah. I'm happy to roll with it. I'm still going purpose. Yeah, right. Okay. Right. Yeah, nah.

I'm happy to roll with it. I'm still going to. I'm still going to. Same. You're going to die of something. Might as well be sweet scented candles. What a way to go. You're in a hostel on a ventilator.

It was worth it. The house smelled like rose petals. And I'd still get them to light one while I was there. Yeah, yeah. Light us up one last French pear. Oh, yes, French pear. What a way to go. French pear is a good girl.

French all. That's got to be my all-time favourite. No, but vanilla coconut's mine. Oh, you like vanilla. You're a big fan of anything vanilla coconut, though. Yeah. French Pammy. French Pammy any day, any time, baby.

I have a dishwasher at home, but I, baby. F.E.M. F.E.M. I have a dishwasher at home, but I also wash a lot of dishes. Okay. Because I've – I'm not a great believer of pots. Pots, no. They take up too much room in the dishwasher. And, like, you don't want to mess up the nonstick, so I always wash the pots.

I've got, like, glasses that can't go in the dishwasher because they have, like – Oh, I can't do glass. They are my Karen Walker mugs. They've got, like, metallic dots on them, and it'll, like, come off if you put them in the dishwasher because they have like a can of glass. They are my Karen Walker mugs. They've got like metallic dots on them and it'll like come off if you put them in the dishwasher. God.

Because Shade will always, well, I mean, this makes it sound like we drink from champagne flutes all the time. But like you guys come over the weekend so we've got the champagne flutes out

and she puts them in the dishwasher. I'm like, darling, please, these are far too fragile. Oh, that's exactly what you said. Why are you telling me about your dishwasher? Darling, please. these are far too fragile. Oh, that's exactly what you said. Why are you telling me about your dishwasher? Darling, please.

Do you wash dishes? Physically? What, do you think he lives in a shithole and just piles his dishes up like a water's house? Of course he washes dishes. No, I put them in the dishwasher. I'm not including putting them in the dishwasher. Apart from the pots and pans. I'll just do by hand.

Yeah, right. Yeah. Do you leave them on the bench to drip dry or do you dry? Dry straight away. Oh, do you? Good, good. There is a new study. This comes from Florida State University that has found mindfully washing your dishes can relieve stress.

So you have to concentrate on the task. So they did a study and just over half found that being mindful and mentally present for the task upped their inspiration by 25% and lowered their nervousness by 27%. Are you allowed to be watching TV? No. Really? You're supposed to be mindfully doing the task. Complete silence.

I've never had a situation where I could wash the dishes and watch TV. That would be good. I've never been in a kitchen set up where the TV is viewable. That's why I put my TV on the other side. So I could be in the kitchen watching TV. Or sometimes I'll have the laptop just on the bench.

And just be watching. My laptop would slip off the windowsill and straight into the sink. Well that doesn't count I don't think because they said you have to be focusing on the task. You have to be fully present and focus on the task at hand. So this is like, it releases, it stops you from being stressed. And I think this goes for, this is why I like cooking, because you're mindfully going,

okay, this is going to happen and I'm going to cut this and then I'm going to move forward to that. You can't really think about anything else. A bit of stress comes into cooking because you've got to get everything ready and not burn things. No, it's cathartic. Is that the right word for me? It relaxes me. That is the right word. But they said any fairly small task

that you can focus on in everyday activity, like washing dishes, with intention and care, can be really stress relieving. Huh. Still, if it's your turn to do the dishes, you don't want to. I mean, the complaining beforehand is not. That's stressful. It's not sexy.

No. Cheese. Cheese as well. What, grating cheese? Someone's been cooking with cheese. Oh, yeah. It bakes onto something. It is a mess.

It is. All right. Did you not think to put this in the sink? So the arguments that you're having with the dishes probably outweighing the, yeah. They don't want to do it. FVM, the podcast. Now we've all done it, myself included,

and Australia are going to start taking this a lot more seriously. At the airport, when your bag's a little bit full, like your check-in luggage, and so you just like shove it all in the carry-on and they're like, a Thursday carry-on fit within these dimensions and under seven kilograms? And you're like, yep, but it's not.

Yep. Because it's like weighing it out. Megan and I have actually done this. Megan's like, we've talked about the best technique to hold something really heavy to make it look like it's not heavy. Because you had a handbag and you were like, if I put it in the joint of my elbow, it really pulls. So you put it up over your shoulder, right? And then counterbalance it with something on the other shoulder. And you've got to walk like it ain't no thing.

You put it like, oh, hi. Well, it turns out that Australia, especially domestically, but any flight leaving Australia, are going to start weighing your carry-on at check-in. So you'll check in your check-in luggage. Yep. And then where you get your boarding pass, et cetera, you'll have to weigh your baggage.

But what if you don't have a chicken bag because you know you just get a seat fair yeah and you just use it right so you're just saying you're just rocking straight with the carry-on well it's somewhere along the way that will make you stop and wait and they're saying yeah they've thought about it and you're not gonna be able to like scott around this anyway they're gonna be weighing your carry-on oh no and making sure which is good because i'll push the limits. Yeah. But I'm not one of those people that takes an oversized suitcase.

It drives me nuts when you're sitting on a plane and you see someone wheeling a suitcase on. You're like, turn around, sunshine, check it in. They're always sitting by me and they, like, push the bag down and shove their bag up or need a hand getting in because it's too big. And no one checks. But the thing about this is Virgin and Qantas got together and said, we're going to

do this at the same time. Cheeky buggers, eh? Cheeky. We're going to get together to make sure people are following the rules. No, because it's not like one of them came out and said we're going to be hard-lined on this. Everyone would be like, oh, we'll just follow Virgin then because they don't care. One of them will pull out at the last

minute. Oh, you mean like we're going to jump off this bridge into the water and you're like, oh, we'll just fly Virgin then because they don't care. One of them will pull out at the last minute. Oh, you mean like we're going to jump off this bridge into the water. Yeah. And you're like, one, two, three, I tricked you. And they're like, ah, like that. And Qantas is like, you said you would. You said you would too. You sucker. Yeah.

Never believe anybody in business. But totally across the board. Is there a size thing or is it just weight? Size and weight. Because sometimes they've got like a duffel bag that's quite, oh no, is that going to be too long? I don't know because the duffel bag's got a bit of, like if they put that little square thing out that you've got to fit it in, you can probably just shove it in there.

But I jam that sucker solid. Oh right, but full. It wouldn't fit in that little thing. A lot of airlines will give you the little stupid sticky you've got to put on your bag to say it's been checked, cabin bag approved. Where can we get those printed? Just get a pile and, yeah. We'll just pull them off your last one.

Much like when a coffee shop does every 10th coffee free and they're just using a smiley face stamp. Come on, guys. You deserve to be ripped off because you're just using a smiley face stamp. So I feel like here, domestically, in New Zealand, don't really care, do they? And even I feel Jetstar, I've flown on them a couple of times. I never got checked.

In New Zealand, everybody's afraid to be the person that does something first because they don't want to be called a dick. Yeah. You don't need to be a dick about it. That's like a real, like that passag thing to say in New Zealand. It hits everybody. You don't want to be the person like, sir, can we just weigh that carry-on baggage? Oh, if you

want to be a dick about it. And then they're like, just take the bloody huge suitcase on board then, sir. No, I don't want to be a dick about it. So while they said they're going to start weighing the bags from today, it's not until December 17 that they really start cracking down on it. So the same day that Tumblr takes porn away, you're also going to have, I don't know why I know that date.

How do I remember that? Have we not lost enough in 2018? December 17's a terrible day! They're going to really start cracking down on exactly like no more than seven kilograms. Right when everybody's going away for Christmas. They have an account for duty-free bags, right? No. Going to hide some heavy stuff at the bottom of that,

under the booze and the ciggies. And the tribal roads. What does that count towards? Surely not. No. That's unfair. That's entrapment. You buy that after chicken.

Yeah, true. And you buy it on the way back through. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. I'd just scull it at the gate if they made me take away my booze. And then push some heavy stuff you brought in there. Oh, you just mean just for a chance to get on it. Well, yeah, if I had to get rid of the booze.

Right. Just chug it down at the gate. Right. Then they won't let you on because you're too drunk. Well, there was that time I had that Bacardi in my carry-on and they're like, we're going to need to take that off you. I was like, am I allowed to drink at all? Like, as a joke.

And he's like, you can try. And I was like, oh, okay. We've reached a standoff. I was like, oh, okay. We've reached a standoff. I was like, no, you can have this. Leave the lid on and take it to your staff Christmas party. Can I share a proud mum moment? Okay. As the mum of one fur baby, Leo, my cute little dog.

Yesterday we had to film a little TV thing. He's making, oh, he's been on Seven Sharp, but he's never been. What was he on Seven Sharp for? When they were doing a story on Andrew, like Leo disappeared. They were doing a story on? Mr. Toyboy. Thank you. But he disappeared.

People don't know who Andrew is. Mr. Toyboy. My apologies. It was a cameo, whereas this is actually about Leo James. So he was filmed yesterday. He's going to be on like a kid's TV show about cute animals. Okay. Cute animals.

Yeah. And he was required. So we filmed for a couple of hours and he was like required to do um his little tricks yeah so he can speak on command and i've also taught him to um speak with just like a hand gesture i've told you this a because if he ever gets into acting i need to be behind the camera just doing hand gestures okay this is what that's that is a fact actually yeah because you can't you can't be talking on set but what is what would he do in a movie? Well, like if he was like someone's pet and he needed to like talk to them

and say something and they needed him to bark, I'd be like. He's not exactly a golden retriever though, is he? He's, you're going to eat your words when I tell you. He's so smart. He's not a husky. Nah. He's not a rolly dog. Oh, no, not a sharp hay.

Like I'm just wondering what kind of roll. He's not even ay dog? Oh, no, not a Sharpay. Like, I'm just wondering what kind of roll. He's not even a chihuahua. He could be like a kid's cute little pal in a movie, and then they go on an adventure together. Right. Have you got him an agent? Nah. But do you know how many they churn through?

Like, my favourite movie when I was a kid was Milo and Otis. Okay. Have you watched Milo and Otis? Yeah. You watched it lately? Nah. It's really old. It was filmed in,

it was a Japanese made movie and it was narrated by an English guy. Growing up, I always just thought it was an English movie, but God, they got through some ginger cats. What do you mean? I don't need to know

because I feel like that was made so long ago, kind of before they cared a lot about animal rights. Before social media uproar. Like if you think that KJ Apapa film, A Dog's Life, had a bit of a rough thing about treatment of animals, like they just lost pugs off cliffs and stuff. No, you're joking. You're joking, eh?

No, they got through a lot of carts and dogs on Milo notice. Like seriously really marred the memory of that. Because I loved that film. I watched it so many times growing up. Okay, well, that's made me nervous to get Leo into it. Yeah, I know. He'll just become very disposable. No.

What? Say it. 20 kittens. Why? Because there's like a scene where the cat jumps and ends up in a river and I'm pretty sure they just rode them off. A kitten's paw to make it look ungainly. A kitten falling off a cliff yeah in the movie i'm never watching that movie again a pug fighting

a bear also in the movie but that did that actually happen yeah yep the conversion this is actually before it's time the conversion of a female cow into a male cow using prosthetics. What? Oh, my God. What? Sex change to cow. What? How? Why didn't they just get a female cow? Wait, was it a male to female?

Because that would be easy. A female to male. No, where do you strap the other? I don't know. Bandage it up. How very, that's weird. Why wouldn't you just get a male one? Oh, wait, female to male.

Why wouldn't you just get a male cow? Oh, wait, females and male. Why wouldn't you just get a male cow? A bull? Maybe unpredictable. Now, these allegations were investigated, but never proven. The film was reported to have had the approval of the American Humane Society, despite not having their officers present during filming. Oh, that's annoying. Yeah, we were great.

We were all good with animals. I know, you can imagine. Well, what year was that made? It's like finding out in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids, if they actually shrunk some kids and then just let them loose in the backyard. That's terrible. So just before you rock too quickly into,

you might become despisable. So he managed yesterday to speak on command. That's pretty good. Yeah, he did very well. I'm super proud. But also during the shoot yesterday, because I was like, he doesn't know enough tricks, we decided to teach him to roll over.

And that's just got a signal too, again, for acting career in the future. What's the signal? Round with the index finger. The same finger signal you do to me when it's time to stop talking. Yeah. The windmill.

Wind it up, round it up. The windmill. Get it done. And he managed to learn how to roll over in about 10 minutes and did it perfectly for the camera. Oh, wow. Proud mum moment. Pretty cute.

We wore him out so much that at the end of the shoot, we tucked him into bed and he laid down and went to sleep with his little lamb. Yeah, I know. So if there's anyone out there that needs a little dog, I'm working on the fee. I will need to be present. We'll talk about what he needs on his rider. Does he need a trailer or a kennel?

Oh, 100% needs a trailer. A kennel on wheels. A kennel on wheels. Yeah, I also have requirements too, but we'll work on that. Okay, you're already turning into a diva. Yeah, you're Tiger Mum. Fletch, Vaughn and Megan. The podcast.

14 sleeps until Christmas. Yes. What? That's awesome. Megan's like, yes, and everyone else is like. Oh, I finish my Christmas shopping too at the weekend. You're too organised. Sorted.

Well, in 14 sleeps time, I hope everybody's dads can measure up to a Sydney financial worker. I hate this guy already. Yeah, Sydney financial. There you go. He's got a lot of money. What's he done? He bought all four of his adult children

apartments for Christmas. How did this get out? Oh my God. Well, no, he's talked about it. He's done an interview about it for a real estate website in Australia. He was afraid his adult children would never be able to save up for a deposit of their own.

So he's put deposits, sizable deposits, on four apartments for them. So they have to pay off the mortgage. So they have to service the mortgage, but he's also put a pretty healthy deposit on it so that the mortgage isn't crippling for them.

And some of them are moving in with their partners and taking over the mortgage. The others are renting out the apartments that are in their name because they,

at the moment, can't cover the mortgage but now they've got investment properties as I guess you'd say. You can't see that eye roll I did. Yeah. And then the best part about it is

in like five or ten years these kids will write a story about how they started their investment portfolio with nothing and they've worked really hard

and how they don't understand why everybody hasn't done it. Yeah. And then you read down the article about three quarters

of the way down these articles it generally says like helped out by dad by purchasing the first thing and you're like

that's misleading. Do you hear that, dad? Are you pushing? Yeah. I think I'm past the prime of presents from dad. The best we got was a go-kart. Never forget it. Have you tried this?

Daddy. Oh, weird coming from me. Daddy. Daddy. Can I have an apartment in Sydney? Daddy. And you're like, what? What is wrong with you?

I've got to use my kids. Skip a generation. Right. Gigi. Because they call him Gigi. Oh, yeah. Gigi, I need an apartment. But then coming from a six-year-old and a four-year-old,

it's going to be a weird approach. I also don't think he'd splash out and buy them an apartment either. No, I don't think so. What age do you think you peaked with gifts from your parents? Maybe like 16, I think. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, we were well past the peak by then. That was a

$10 instant Kiwi off the tree, a box of scorched almonds and like a gift voucher for somewhere by that age. No, because when you were younger, they're like, oh, you don't appreciate it. And then when you were like teenager, or maybe it was like 15 or younger. Oh, it was way young for us. It was right in the height of the magic of Christmas, like 8, 9, 10. They were like cut off.

Cut it off. But then I was a spoiled shit because I remember counting. I'd be like, Jocelyn's got seven and I've got six. My brother was like, and so my mum is fanatic about everyone getting exactly the same amount of money spent on them. And I'm like, who cares? Just buy people what they need or what they've asked for. But it's because my brother was all the time, he's like, how much? I can remember him saying on Christmas, how much did that one cost?

It's like, it's Christmas. Yeah. And he's like, come on. Yeah, but were you getting more? No. It was always our sister that he suspected was getting more. Oh, yeah. Because of the year

We got the go-kart That was all three of us But the same year She got a Well there was a horse as well A pony Oh right okay I think that was free

Because it was pretty shithouse And Like he was like Well this isn't fair We've got to share the go-kart She's got her own horse It's like that sort of She's got it

It's a $200 spare on her He knew how to grinch it out as a kid. Yeah. As a kid. But now he's like that with his kids. You've got to spend... Everything's got to be exactly the same. Does he know that's the voice you choose for him?

Yeah, well, he sounds like me, so... I was just doing a more extreme version of my own voice. A Danish photographer has sparked fury among Egyptians after a video and some posts have gone viral. So he climbed the pyramids,

one of the seven ancient wonders of the world, the pyramids of Giza. How many pyramids are there? One? There's heaps, eh? There's a couple, eh? I've never been. Really want to go one. pyramids of Giza. Giza. How many pyramids are there? One? Mm-hmm. There's heaps, eh? No, there's a couple.

There's a couple, eh? Yeah. I've never been. Really want to go one day. I didn't think you were allowed to climb right to the top. No, you're not. Because remember those Russians

that they got in big trouble. Yeah, right. Well, they did this at night and it's not the fact that they climbed the pyramids that got them in trouble. It's the fact that the video shows the man and the woman

climbing up the skyline of Cairo was in the background. Oh, gorgeous. They reach the top. The video shows the woman taking off her shirt before it finishes with a still image of the couple in a naked embrace appearing to be having sex. Oh, my God, sex. On top of the pyramid.

How do you do that? I don't know. Wait, my God, sex. On top of the pyramid. How do you do that? I don't know. I leaned against the... Looking at the still here, it looks like quite roomy. On the top. But also hard. I always considered it would come to a peak. Yeah, I mean, I've never been up there.

To a four-sided peak. How did they build those? You're sure they're not doing it on the Sphinx? Now, the Sphinx would have a flat top. They're also harder to get onto the top of. Yeah, much harder to get up the side of the Sphinx. Now, the Sphinx would have a flat top. They're also harder to get onto the top of. Yeah, much harder to get up the top of the Sphinx. Well, now that the nose is gone, there's nowhere to really hold on to. What is it?

I can see over your shoulder there. Is that a video? Yeah. It's a three-minute video. I thought it was just photos. Three minutes. And it ends with a still. Wait.

And it's all been produced up. It's on YouTube. Well, this is, yeah, but it looks like it's been taken down. Way to incriminate yourself. So it gets up to the top. And then they get to the top, skyline, and then it ends just with a naked photo. Right. That one. Oh! So there's a lot

of... Oh, let's see. I didn't... Oh, okay. I hadn't assumed, I hadn't in my mind even run through the possibility of positions. I can't believe that's still on YouTube. Because that's actual nudity. That's actually nudity. But you're incriminating yourself, right?

Yeah, a lot of room though there. So, I mean, that's answered your question. Is there no security at night? They just like crawled on up there. I don't believe so, yeah. But maybe there's one security guy and there's obviously four sides of the pyramid. So he's probably around one side and they go around the other side. He's around the other side.

Go up now. Right at the top. Wow. And he probably very rarely goes to the top on a routine check. Is it warm at the moment? Would the rocks be cold, do you think? It's cold at night in the desert, even if it's really hot in the day. Maybe they had a blanket, one of those, like, Kathmandu travel picnic.

I would want to lay down one of those, at least, because, like, the gritty old sandstone would really rub your nipples raw. What if there's a scorpion up your bum? You wouldn't do this, Smither. You're very traditional, aren't you? No, well, once we did it sideways on a king-sized bed, that was pretty adventurous.

As opposed to long ways. Because kings are pretty much the square, you know? And I was like, let's spice things up and do it that way. Rather than the traditional heads where heads go and toes where toes go. Yeah right. Okay. Sideways. Yep. Out of control. Right.

Okay. Nah. It's never been in my sort of like DNA. My repertoire. Like to be like hey we're at A waterfalls Let's do it Like

We're at a waterfalls I'm probably very sweaty Tired Are we at the top or the bottom Are there people there Yeah right Yeah we're I don't want to get caught

Yeah Fair enough You know we're not That sort of Couple Couple At all Try it

In our very young days She can be angry at me Saying this No she won't be in the car yet In our very young days, she can be angry at me saying this. No, she won't be in the car yet. In our very young days, we tried in a car. No room. No room.

No room. What car were you doing it in? Six foot two. It was a sizable vehicle. It wasn't like massive. It wasn't like a station wagon. It wasn't a work car, was it? No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

But it was too small and too tall for that stuff. Yeah, right. But what if it was like a ute or a van? Would that have been a bit better? What a flat deck of a ute. Well, if it's a wooden flat deck, you'll get a splinter. And if it's metal, it's too hard. I'm a creature of comfort. Not even the floor, even if it was carpeted with a long carpet,

would probably be comfortable. Look, I'm a bed-based guy. No, we're asking you first Fletch What about you? I don't know You travel a lot With all your travels Surely there's been

Some exotic locations Beards Any truth that you Screamed oh God While inside that Statue of Jesus in Brazil No you're not allowed Inside that

Oh I thought you went up To the top through it No Oh no I think you can go in. Maybe you have to pay extra. All right, it's a special treat. What, are you trying to get me in trouble with the churches? Calm down.

Yeah, no. What about you, Megan? You've done a bit of travel. Nowhere exotic for you? No. Fairly standard? Yeah. Oh, that's bullshit.

What a lie. I mean, we knew Fletch was lying. No, yeah. Yeah. No. No. I don't want to talk about it. Go the other way.

Who else have we got? James. Caitlin. We asked this story on Instagram. We asked this question, rather, on our Instagram story, saying, you know, the exotic locations such as, I mean, no one's going to be at the top of the pyramid. Have you ever done it somewhere naughty?

Yeah, while being a tourist. Yep. And we're going to come back next. We want to hear your calls. Okay. And you can text 9696 or call 0800 dial Z. And we don't need the details. We just want to know locations.

No, just the place. Yeah, yeah. And someone said on the Inter-Islander. Oh, yuck. Where? In the pokies room. Well, that's the gaming room. Yeah, I was going to say, probably best to call it the gaming room.

Don't call it the pokies. Not in this case. But if you had, like, a station wagon and it was downstairs and... No, you're not allowed below decks during sailing. Aren't you? No. You're not allowed to stay in the car. Why not?

Just in case it's turbulent. Oh, okay. But that's what I'm saying. A bit of motion in the ocean and do the work for you. Okay. Well, let's take some calls. No details. No, just locations.

Other than location. Where was the naughtiest place you've done it? 0800 dialsM 9696. FEM. ZM. We want to know the weirdest place you've done it because a couple have sparked outrage in Cairo because they did it on top of the pyramid.

And actually, judging, looking at the picture, it's very roomy up there. I hadn't even thought about the... I thought it would go to a point. Yeah. Like a 10, 10, 20 point. There's a... It's kind of a flat surface.

I hadn't even thought about the politics of Egypt. Just the fact that it was kind of like on a tourist spot would make it bad enough, but predominantly Muslim country. That's not going to be, public stuff isn't going to be. Get out of there before they put you in prison. Yeah, you definitely, that would be the least of what would happen. So taking your calls and your text messages, we're going to start now with an anonymous caller. Anonymous, good morning.

Good morning. Now, where is the most exciting, exotic place you've done it? So when I was living in London, I met a firefighter, and we did it in the back, behind the hall, in the training tower on the stairs. Oh, okay. The training tower? Where they put on all their gear and run up?

Yeah, yeah. But he wasn't in any gear or anything. And then the fire alarm went off sort of after, kind of. And then he had to go. Yeah. He's like, sorry, babe, I've got to go save some lives. That's the thing A firefighter can do He says to his mates

Give me five minutes And then set off the alarm Yeah I'm all Did he carry you Over his shoulders What do they call that The fireman carry

You do it in No No I wish he had But no he didn't Oh my gosh Okay Not content with doing it On the stairs

You wouldn't be carried Up there too Matt where was the Most exotic place That you've done it? We've been to Hamilton Gardens. Get out. The beautiful hotel. There's lots of nooks and crannies in there.

There are. Was it in one of the themed gardens? It was, actually, yeah. Oh, God. Nannies go there. But they weren't there at the time, though. Yeah, right. That's important.

Taylor, where's the naughtiest place you've done it? On Miami Beach. Oh, okay. God, I've been there. Yuck. Which part? Oh, is it yuck? No, it was at night time and it was on top of, they've got these big wooden boxes

which they store all like the umbrellas and stuff in. Oh, sexy. Right. Okay. Right, okay. Oh, yeah, we're doing it on the hireable seats. Oh, yeah, baby, take it on the storage unit full of weird cushions. Sexy.

Taylor, thanks for your call. Thank you, guys. Oh, my gosh gosh Just open up By the way You are Amazing stories And so many Text messages

I think we need A gallery out of this Oh and just put up Like the postcards Yeah Of the spots Yes Um

Hmm I'm gonna say We are gonna say Filter some of these Oh definitely Somebody Now I'm struggling To believe that the Log flume at Rainbow's End is even possible. What?

Somebody has done it on the log. Because if there's two of you, one's supposed to sit in the front, one's supposed to sit in the back. And there's cameras. Security cameras. They can say, keep your hands inside the log, please. You don't want that water getting on your skin. Let alone the photo that

they take of you while you're zooming down that thing. You don't want to be like, huh, in the throes of it. Oh my goodness me. Somebody said in Cairns, there's an iconic playground with a big green fish and the fish's mouth's wide open. Inside the fish's mouth's where we, that's weird, isn't it?

If I ever go there, that's all I'm going to be thinking about. That big green fish Somebody said Oh some of these are And some They keep coming in And keep pushing down the On the Dubrovnik wall

Like where people go To get the Game of Thrones photo The walls of Dubrovnik They cleaned up Before they filmed The latest season Yeah I feel like these places should be monitored more.

Yeah, definitely. But that's what people like. It's risque, isn't it? Right. Somebody said at a golf course that's regularly on television on the Pro Tour. Oh, okay. They don't say which golf course because I'm imagining you won't be invited back. Yeah.

If you've gone into the rough on the 14th. Somebody else said, it's not like that exotic, but it was in a car wash. A car wash? Yeah. When the car's been cleaned, you can't see in. I don't like the time pressure because you've got three minutes. Yeah. We'd have to pay for a deluxe wash and I'm against the deluxe wash because I don't believe the extra $7 does anything.

Yeah, right. They say it cleans under the car, but what? Do you get under there to check? No. You never do a good job. Somebody said the top of Paratutu Rock in New Plymouth. Oh, goodness me. You never know when a school group's coming up there on a little walk.

And the last one I'm going to read, the top of Mount Ruapehu. They said it was quite cold and I'm surprised that that much steam can come off somebody's cradle. But then that makes sense. A very warm, a warm item in a cold environment will let off steam. Somebody else said the top of Mount Taranaki as well.

The last time I was up there, like even in summer, the wind chill was like minus 10 or something. I know. Well, I heard that if you're climbing Everest, you can't even whip it out

for a wee because you'll get frostbite. So you're really risking your genitals there getting them out at elevated alpine conditions. A word of caution there. Really, a safety warning.

If we can take anything from this. From your local search and rescue. Ho, ho, ho. Mr. Film Fight. Ho, ho, ho, ho. Fourteen sleeps away from the big day. Fourteen sleeps

until you have to have all your Christmas shopping done. I mean, I'd have it done before that if I was you, but whatever. I mean, it's up to you. It's your life.

Megan's done hers already. I've finished mine at the weekend. I even made that pasta from scratch for gifts too, but I mean, no pressure. Well, every time I try to, I just end up buying myself something, so. Oh, there's nothing wrong with that. I do that too.

Bit of that, bit of that. So we've been trying to find the ultimate Christmas movie as voted by you. And it's come down to the final two that have defeated everything that stood in their way. First up, Home Alone. When the McAllister family left on their Christmas vacation. Did we miss the flight?

No, you just made it. Yeah! They forgot one small thing. Have yourself. I have terrible feelings. Kevin! Home alone. A lot of holes in that plot.

Like forgetting your own child. So, no, because they counted the neighbour. The annoying neighbour kid comes over. You know, because I was like, how would you miss your own child? I heard my daughter explaining it to my other daughter. She's like, how did they get left behind? And Indy said, because that annoying kid from next door was over

and they counted him and they thought they had Kevin, but they didn't have Kevin. I was like, okay, someone's paying attention. And someone messaged me saying that, because we were like, how did the dad afford to take everybody over there? Where they were going, there was a family member who was really rich

who had paid for them to go. Were we just not listening when we watched these movies when we were kids? Right. We were just freaking out about the old guy next door who shovels snow. What's his backstory? I need to know more.

It's an absolute classic. Even though it is quite old, Home Alone, it still gets a release every year. It gets replayed over and over again. Nostalgic. It is. Absol release every year. It gets replayed over and over again. Nostalgic. Absolute Christmas classic. It's going up against a movie that came out in 2003 around Christmas. Launched a lot of careers.

Gets played on television every year. People watch it when it's not even Christmas. Producer Caitlin watches this about six times a year. And it really set us to continue to hate Alan Rickman, who had already become a little bit hated from the first two Harry Potter movies by the time this one came out. R.I.P.

By playing the, what's his character's name in Love Actually? Oh. Come on, you've watched it so many times. I know, I watched it yesterday. I can't even remember. Are you kidding me? You watched it yesterday. It's not John.

Alan Rickman's character. Anyway, I will just call him. I don't think he has a name. We'll call him Muggle Snake. Home Alone is up against Love Actually. When desires are revealed, secrets are exposed, and chances are finally taken. All you need is love, actually.

I feel like we don't need the trailers for any of these movies because we know. We know. Now, we've stopped doing movie trailers like that, eh? Yeah, they don't have a... Movie trailer voice guy doesn't have much work. Well, he died. That one did. Movie trailer guy died.

He was a couple of dudes, eh? They don't even have voiceovers anymore. He was Harry, by the way. Harry. Harry. Okay. So, you vote. 24 hours of voting on our Instagram.

It'll be a story poll. FVMZM. And tomorrow, one will be crowned the ultimate Christmas movie according to you. Now, I would have thought, as good as Home Alone is, and nostalgia-wise, surely Love Actually's got this, just because of the feels. This is going to be neck and neck, right? Yeah. I don't think I can pick a winner.

Who did you vote for? Oh, it's close. It's so close. I voted for Love Actually. Love Actually, come on. It gives you all the feels. So at this very early stage of voting, there's been nearly 400 votes. Okay.

And it's 194 votes for Love Actually, 171 for Home Alone. So very close. Okay. And it's 194 votes for Love Actually, 171 for Home Alone. So very close. Okay. Very close. So it's almost 50-50. Almost. Well, exactly. You get so many movies in one.

53-47 at the moment. To Love Actually. Yes. What about all the different storylines? So many stories in one. Too much to follow. No. Into Woven.

I would rather the simple... I voted Home Alone. I would rather the simple... I voted Home Alone. I would rather the simple story of a boy versus two burglars. Burglars. Burglars. The wet bandits. Hilarious.

What about the booby traps? Does love actually have booby traps? No, but it has the complications of love and how it triumphs in the end. And love is represented by a eight-year-old left at home. He triumphs in the end over... The burglars. Over the burglars. Burglars. Burglars.

Over the burglars. And who didn't want to strap a giant cardboard cutout to a train and turn the lights on so it made it look like someone was moving around the lounge? See, I don't think a toy train set could actually pull that. But, I mean, that's a good answer. No, with that attitude, they can't. The little train that could. All right, well, you vote.

And we'll announce our winner tomorrow. Love Actually or Home Alone, the best Christmas movie ever. Vote now on our Instagram, FEMZM. FEMZM. There is a story that reveals the most popular day to get engaged. Just before we head into it,

it's not Valentine's Day. Maybe that's just too predictable. I would have thought it would be Valentine's Day. Or the person's birthday. It's not. We are heading into the most popular time to get engaged. December is the busiest time for engagements and they're predicted, based on every other year, exactly which day the most people will be proposed to.

I would have thought that would have been the worst time. Like you've got so much. Yeah, there's a lot happening. A lot of stress. Do you think some people, like, do you still get Christmas presents if you get an engagement ring? Oh, I wouldn't think so. That's the first thing I'm thinking of. Oh, right.

So it's like two birds. That's not in lieu of a present. I still need a Christmas present. But you're not going to care what your Christmas present is if you're engaged, are you? As much? See, I wouldn't like it on Christmas Day because I've eaten too much. Like, all the

family that I'm forced to be with might not necessarily actually like it there. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. It's not the most romantic. Do they listen to the show? I mean, that's setting a fairly weird Probably not. mood this far out from Christmas. The people I'm forced to spend time with who I don't really like.

Yeah. I really hope someone brings it up at Christmas dinner. Hey, so Megan, you don't like us. And then your auntie's like, show me. Oh, how big is it? Oh, okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah, right.

That's a cute diamond, isn't it? Okay. So they've actually worked it out to date. They've predicted it based on every other year that the most popular day for proposals, everyone who's in a long-term relationship is like, okay, okay, is the 23rd of December, which is the Saturday before Christmas.

Really? Yeah. Is it always the Saturday before Christmas or is it always the 23rd? I don't know, actually. Because you think more people will get proposed to on a weekend, right? Because you can go somewhere and do something. Yeah.

And then followed up by the Sunday, December 24. But maybe you had it on the head with it's a Christmas present. Like the ultimate Christmas present. Well, they think because everyone has time off at that time, so you can celebrate. You're surrounded by family. So maybe you do it privately on the 23rd or the 24th, and then afterwards, the next day, you'll be like, yay, we can all celebrate together. You tell them, yeah.

You tell them. Yeah. Yeah, and everyone's feeling festive. Yeah, right. It's kind of ruining, it's overshadowing Christmas. Yeah. So what about me and my presents? Yeah, no, Christmas is overshadowing my engagement. Sit down, Jesus. It's overshadowing Christmas. Yeah. So what about me and my presents? Yeah, no, Christmas is overshadowing my engagement.

Sit down, Jesus. It's my time. And also all your friends are busy as well. Sit down, Jesus. You're not going to get enough attention. Yeah. I reckon that's a silly time to do it. I wouldn't personally like that.

No, it's a great time. You're going to get the pre-Christmas likes. You reckon? You worry about friends. No, no, no. You're not going to get Enough of your friends' attention Oh yeah, right But you're going to get that

Everybody's like You're going to get The pre-Christmas likes When did you propose? November the 9th Okay July the 5th Is when I got proposed to

And October the 12th Because there have been two And next time I hope it's March And then the time after that I'm gunning for like a New Year's Eve. They're like Pokemon. You've got to collect them all. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's fact is that I'm going to give you a choice. Okay. Would you rather learn the origins of the phrase souped up, like that's souped up, or would you rather learn the origins of the phrase cack-handed? Souped up. Souped up. Like, because you've got a car, you've souped it up.

Yeah, you've souped it up. And it makes no sense when you think about it. Yeah. Because what's it got to do with soup? What's it got to do with soup? What's it got to do with soup? What's it got to do with soup? What's it got to do with soup? Okay. Well, most of the time now,

souped up is spout S-U-P-E-D and people just think it's to do with supercharging. Right. A car's engine or supering it up. Yeah. Making it super. Yeah. But it's actually not.

It dates back to well before cars and racehorses are actually the origins of souped up. Because if a racehorse could run far quicker than all the other racehorses and obliterated it, obliterated the field, there was a thought that

it must be on steroids or some sort of drug. And if they didn't know what kind of drug it would be, they'd assume it was a cocktail or a soup. Oh, like a soup. A soup of drugs that could have been injected into the horse. Right.

So they'd say that horse is on the soup. Or it's... It's been souped up. Yeah. And that means that the horse was on drugs and that's why it was so good at racing. And so anything that you... And so then when cars came around, you'd say it's been souped up against, like a soup, because it could

go so much faster than all the other cars, like the horses could, except obviously you can't inject drugs into a car. But even if you just put like a Swedish spoiler, a new spoiler on your car, you'd just say it's souped up. So it changed the point, and also the spelling kind of changed to more of an S-U-P

versus the S-O-U-P of soup. Right. That we're all familiar with. So the origins are it was a soup. I kind of want to tell you the other one too now. I don't want you to. You don't want me to? I don't care about that one.

Do you care about that one? No, I don't even know what. What was it? Cat-handed. I don't even know what that means. I learned it off Stephen Fry. He's quite intelligent. You personally attacked Stephen Fry. But no, you don't want to know. You don't even know what that means. I learned it off Stephen Fry. He's quite intelligent. You personally attacked Stephen Fry, but no, you don't want to know.

You don't want to know that spawn. So today's fact of the day is the term. You're actually shitty. You're actually grumpy. No, it's good. No, tell us real quick. No, I don't want to now. Can you tell us in five words?

Sediment challenge. Good. Doing good. We'll just say approximately five just say Approximately five words Approximately Oh because I've got it Down to six words I'll give you six

Do six Cack means poo Yep Non-pooey hand Oh right Okay Yeah So people that were

Cleaning up poos No no no Wiping your own butt You always wiped With your right Wiped with the left hand because your right hand was for doing everything else. But if you were prominently left-handed,

you were cack-handed because that was the hand that you got the cack on. Oh, right. Okay. Okay. That's lovely. So that's when you do things around the other way. We didn't go past your six words. Yeah, I know.

I kind of explained both even though I said I wasn't going to. So today's facts of the day is that souping something up actually comes from the word soup, meaning a mixture of cocktails and cack-handed means that you left with, that you led with the hand you also wiped your butt with. Fact of the day!

Day, day, day, day! This is actually a New Zealand study. Okay. Is it? Yeah, I know. Yay. We've invested time into quite a serious thing. You know, our studies, so much in the world needs to be taken care of.

But researchers from New Zealand have published a study in the Medical Journal of Australia. So now you're like, study, Medical Journal, this is going to be good. No, not really. It studied the drinking habits of James Bond. 007, 007. I'll have a martini, shaken, not stirred. But isn't shaking like the wussy way'll have a martini shaken not stirred bingo but isn't shaking like the bum bum

the wussy way to have a martini bum bum what do you mean the wussy way because you're shaking it out with ice it's like watering it down

if you just stir it oh you're saying it's more booze yeah but they're not quite like a cold yeah martini

yeah the I will give them points though for what they called their report licensed to swill. James Bond drinking over six decades. He does drink a lot though.

But he's got to always ask for the shake and not sit, otherwise it wouldn't be a James Bond movie. Exactly. Well then he got Heineken sponsored. Remember Heineken paid like $50 million to be the prominent alcohol. And you wouldn't shake that. It'd bloody spray everywhere when you opened it. And then Bollinger as well, the champagne, you wouldn't shake that.

The cork would go off and then that would be all over the ground and that's expensive and a waste. He had to not only have his martini but also take on these other sponsorship deals. So he's like, hey, come back here. Oh, I'm steamed up. Here you go, I'll catch you later. So that over the movies it was 109 drinking

events, which means he's drinking four and a half times per film. Wow. But he's always got to go undercover in like a poker tournament or something or a function. So he's got to have a drink there, doesn't he? Yeah. His peak binge

totaled 24 units of alcohol, which is like hooning six martinis, shake or not, Steve. That was that episode where he did crate day, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. To infiltrate the Bogan gang. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He had to go undercover and hoon all those line red swappers, and he's like, what's wrong with this guy?

He's trying to tell us something. He's dead. Shit, take his keys off him. He's not driving home the Aston Martin in that condition. But they're saying he does have a, you know, if anybody else was drinking that much, it would be a disorder. Why is this a study? Like, this is a fictitious movie.

Yeah. And did they have to sit down? They were just wanting to watch the whole Bond series right from the start to the end. Great way to get a unit. I've always felt like I drink more than James Bond, so they're trying to make me feel bad too. It's been one of the biggest years on record for Uber in New Zealand.

So Uber, the driving service, and also Uber Eats, the Give Me Food Now service. Oh, God. The Give Me Food Now service. It still blows my mind, the amount of people, because I live right in the give me food now service. Oh God. The give me food now service. It still blows my mind the amount of people because I live right in the central heart of the city. And the people, we live like the building so close to every food imaginable,

two minutes walk max. And then you have to get out of bed and like put on clothes. People get it to the door, Megan. It's so lazy. Because some people sit in bed and you can write directions on the message and be like, okay, come in the door, go down the hallway, I'm the second bedroom on the left. That's too much.

I wouldn't want to creep in someone's house. Yeah. You've been invited in, that's not creeping. Yeah. So keeping in mind, how many centres is Uber in New Zealand? Yeah. So drivers have travelled more than 83 million Ks, the equivalent of traveling to the moon and back 108 times.

Jeez. In New Zealand. God, imagine the Uber fare on that. Yeah. So the food delivery, Uber Eats, the most expensive order cost $870. Wow. But that, surely that's a function.

That's a party. That's a work. You think so. You yourself a party there. Yeah. But then are they getting it from a multitude of places or are they getting it from one place or? Like in just an expensive restaurant, probably.

Do expensive restaurants do Uber Eats? Yeah, I don't know. How expensive? Yeah, true. I don't know. How expensive? Yeah, true. I've only ever got a lot of food. Like pizza. Oh, no, no. I've been pizza because they deliver.

Yeah, maybe there's heaps of pizza. Yeah. That's a lot of pizza. Yeah. How many pizzas would you get? You get a discount for buying that many. But even you couldn't do it in the scooter. You'd have to be doing it in the back of a station wagon that much. Some do, you couldn't do it in the scooter.

You'd have to be doing it in the back of a station wagon, that much pizza. Some do it on bikes, don't they? That much pizza's not a bike job. That's too much. That's definitely not a bike job. Yeah. There was also one customer who made 438 Uber Eats orders. So I guess that's over a year, two, or one a day. One, sometimes three.

So yeah, sometimes like every meal. That's ultimate lazy because you'd know all your drivers. The driver would see you gaining the weight. Are they supposed to say anything? Oh, like an intervention. When your Uber Eats driver says something. It's time to pull back. Turn up a year later and they're like,

you should update your profile pic, mate, because you're blowing out. Yeah, well, it was the $800 pizza order I put in.