ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - December 13 2019

Episode Date: December 12, 2019

IT'S PRODUCER CAITLIN'S LAST EVER SHOW.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM Head music lives here Fletch, Fawn and Megan the podcast I don't know what's happening here it's we've missed our intro

we need our intro it's the last show of the the year 6-16 the decade chuck it in there James chuck it in mate chuck it in James

chuck it in mate chuck it in there, James. Chuck it in, mate. Chuck it in, mate. Chuck it in. And Caitlin's last show as well. All right, you long-winded. No, no, no. It's story time. James. So there is the...

That's a great indication of what the show is going to be. I think it's on cray. Yeah, so I think what's... So overnight there was a power cut here at the NZME building. And I think the audio server is not finding that intro. Do you think try that now? Nah, see, it's not playing that, is it, at all? Chuck it in again.

I'll try it in the button bar, James. See if that works. See if that works. These are weird words for people who are just waking up to hear. Chuck it in again, James. I'll give the button bar a... I'll tap. You don't tap it, Megan.

It's gentle. It's a gentle click. Off the button bar. There we go. Major critical power failure overnight at NZME Central. And we are certain to have most services up and running. Should you encounter any issues to any services, please contact the service desk.

Oh, James. That's the email. Hit the service desk. Hit the service desk, James, and tell them the audio is F. Mate, I saw the people from service desk running around. I think I saw one of them crying out there. So I'm just going to give them a bit of space. Wow.

And we'll figure it out. I think we're only, which is the main thing, which I think there's a couple of other stations that aren't. Some of the other radio stations don't have buttons on and faders working in their desks. What a shame. What a shame. Welcome to the show. If you usually listen to

Newstalk ZB, coming up soon, some racist rhetoric and we'll be blaming people in poor socioeconomic situations for all of the problems that we could have avoided ourselves. It's Caitlin's last show. Oh, my God.

Oh, producer Caitlin just sitting here to my left. Hello. Yeah. I'm sad. I've already had a couple of well-ups this morning. Because I looked over at Megan and she looked really beautiful and it made me tear up. What do you think of this current situation? My nipples have already had a hammering this morning? Because I looked over at Megan and she looked really beautiful and it made me tear up. What do you think

of this current situation? My nipples have already had a hammering this morning. What? Oh my God. It's your last day. You need to explain that. Caitlin grabs my...

No, explaining it does nothing except incriminate you further, Your Honour. You grab my nipples regularly. No, but to be clear, you always bite her. I've bitten her once, maybe twice.

That's how many times she's touched my nipples already this morning. You know what I think the show needs for the final show of the year and Caitlin's last show? What? We need a GoDaddy. We need a big, we need the best one you got. We need the best one you got in the cartridge. By the best one you got, what does that mean?

Does that mean long, low, rumbly Like we've nodded off And hit the rumble lines I tried to do a really long and hard one at Friday Jams And it came out really weird And the person I did it to looked to me Very concerning She was concerned

You're in your comfort zone now And you take your time Alright everybody The final show starter for 2019. Let's have a big old Go Daddy. Go Daddy. I'm sorry. That's a good song. That lingered.

That lingered. Oh, that was great, wasn't it? That was the best one. Yeah. All right, you lot. Listen up. It's story time. That lingered. That lingered. Oh, that was great, wasn't it? That was the best one, yeah. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. Story time, the last story time for 2019. For the decade.

Before the new season of story time in 2020. Oh, it's back. Did it get renewed? It got renewed. Wow, really? Defied the critics. It got renewed. It's an early morning segment that fills a gap. So, of get renewed? It got renewed. Wow, really? Defied the critics. It got renewed. It's an early morning segment that fills a gap.

So of course it's been renewed. Headline one, how I met your police cell. Headline two, 911 operator mutes phone ring. And headline three, $3 million pulled pork. A go. $3 million pulled pork. I would eat that. I would love a pulled pork. A go. $3 million pulled pork. I would eat that. Straight for the food.

I would. I'd love a pulled pork. It's been a while since I've done a pulled pork. Well, it's a winter thing, isn't it? No, no, no, no. Summer in the barbecue. In the barbecue. Slow cookout in a barbecue pulls beautifully.

But, of course, you've always got to get the shoulder. Oh, okay. You've got to get the shoulder. Some people's trick is to take the bone out, but I think you get a better taste than cook if you leave the bone in the shoulder. Oh, okay. You've got to get the shoulder. Some people's trick is to take the bone out, but I think you get a better taste than cook if you leave the bone in, personally. Oh, okay. That's my personal. So I love tacos that are pulled pork tacos.

Pulled pork tacos. With a fresh slaw. Yep. A nutty slaw? No. Maybe a nutty slaw. Like a peanut. Finely chopped up peanut.

Tangy slaw, but you can get a couple of nuts in there. Yeah, maybe a bit of lime juice. Ah, yes, yes, yes, yes, of course. Lime juice, yes. Easy. We need a barbecue at your place in the new year. Oh, yes, we shall. Because I just basically want to use your pole one percenter.

Okay. I'll have to buzz you in the electric gate. I was going to say, will you let me in the electric gate? Yep. I'll bring some friends too. I don't know about that. And will you be away any weekends?

Yes, but I won't be telling you. Right, okay. And I'll be changing the gate code. Do we want the pulled pork one then? $3 million pulled pork? I want my one. Okay, don't make that noise. It's a bit creepy.

We go now to America. A routine traffic stop in North Carolina has turned up a whopping $3 million in cash that was hidden inside barrels of raw pork shoulders and was likely heading to Mexico. The money was found Saturday by police after they stopped a truck and trailer unit for failure to maintain its lane and impeding the flow of traffic.

This is what you want to do if you've got $10 million cash on board. You want to drive like a lunatic. Exactly. Police stopped the vehicle. A canine found more than 100 stacks of cash wrapped in plastic barrels under pork. Under pork. Which is pork used barrels under pork. Under pork? Which is the pork used for

pulled pork. Pulled pork. As you mentioned, get the shoulder. Yeah, exactly, yeah. And look, there's a picture of the $3 million of cash on the table. Gigantic. There was $10 million before. I said $3. I'm pretty sure you said $10. Did I make up the $10? Yes, you were

adding numbers there. My love of a good bit of hyperbole. I was like, make it ten. Yeah. Wow. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. All right, this is going to be... Grown up.

This is going to be grown up. It's going to be stats. Eyebrow. Eyebrow stat chat. Statistical chat. Statistical stat chat. So Pornhub have released their end of year data. Yep.

All their statistics. This one's Australian, but they do get pretty specific. Like I'm imagining in the next few days. Yep. We'll get a New Zealand specific one because they've got all the data. People are freaking out right now.

They're like, what? But they always release the average time spent watching and different things. The searches that defined 2019 is quite interesting. Okay. I'll just read out some of the interesting of the top 10 because not all 10 can obviously be

read out. No, no. Number two was Alien. Alien? They believe that's related to the Area 51 Because not all 10 can obviously be read out. No, no. Number two was alien. What? Alien? They believe that's related to the Area 51. You know how we were going to rate Area 51 this year? I didn't know that was a thing. Yeah.

Is that someone dressed up? Yeah. Or like cartoon. Acting like an alien or alien animated stuff. Because that's just humans, eh? Like, I'm here from another planet. Well, we should probably get down to business. Show us your dick.

What do they even have? I mean, maybe it's just more of a curious tentacle. Like, what do you guys have? Show us your tentacle with a face on the end. Oh, my God. I don't know. This is going to be highbrow. So number five

is cosplay. I thought you said that last one was number two. Yeah, Megan, I can't read every... Some of them are inappropriate. Cosplay, so that's like dressing up. Big year for the Avengers. I'd imagine there'd be some Incredible Hulk stuff. Yeah.

Number six is mature. Looking for the older... Number eight, Apex. Incredible Hulk stuff Yeah There's number six Is Mature Oh okay For the older The older Number eight Apex Don't look at me Don't look at me

I'm the youngest On this bloody show Yeah and your current Situation mate It's rich Yeah Very rich Real rich

Number eight Is Apex Legends Which was A video game Like the Battle Royale Post Fortnite Oh right Okay It's a game like the Battle Royale post-Fortnite. Oh, right. Okay.

It's a game like that. Yeah, right. With set characters. A lame list, but you can't read out the good ones, can you? Not really. Can you? Is there anyone to dance around? No, I don't think.

I think we can source a list ourselves if we're that interested. They released the top 20 countries by traffic. Okay. We're not on the list. We're They released the top 20 countries by traffic. Okay. We're not on the list. We're not within the top 20 countries. Number one, and it is by miles, is the United States. Wow, okay. The top 20 countries account for 79% of the daily traffic to that website.

A lot of countries as well ban these kind of websites. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some of the more conservative countries around the world, which sound terrible. The Philippines, would you consider them conservative? Drugs and stuff like that, they're on the list. Really? Yeah, yeah.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. So I'm surprised that's not banned. They're above Australia now. They've got a massive population. Yeah, but then the more you say like nipples and that kind of thing are bad, then the more. You have to Google them. I'm always Googling things.

Nipples. That's what I Google when I'm looking for hot picks. Nipples. The average time spent per visit. Thailand wins this at 11 minutes and 21 seconds. Really? Again, we're not on the list. We don't need that long, do we?

So we must be under 8 minutes 35. Okay. Age demographics, that's interesting. This is compared to last year. The 18 to 24 bracket is spending 64 seconds less. However, the 25 to 34 has gone up 23 seconds average viewing. Right. The 65 plus, so your boomers,

they're watching for 125 seconds longer than they were last year. Oh no. So dad's worked out how to use the iPad. 23% 23 second increase from female viewers. How do they Is this for people who sign up?

Because how would they know that you're male or female? Favourite times. Now this is very interesting. Currently, it's 21 minutes past six. This is one of the quieter hours. Only just behind 4 a.m. and 5 a.m. Okay.

It peaks at midnight. Wow. Is it the busiest time? 11 a.m., midnight. Yep, 11 p.m. or midnight. I'm well asleep by midnight. The busiest time is 11pm on a Sunday night. Wow.

But you've got work on Monday. You should be asleep. Everyone's up from the weekend, aren't they? Yeah, they're trying to get themselves to sleep. That's all I've heard. But we do joke about Megan's one o'clock Jonas. Which doesn't happen. She's got alone time with the Jonas brothers.

One o'clock is a weird anomaly. It's where it turns around from the quiet morning period. I mean, it starts to go up, but one o'clock's where it goes above average. There's a spike there at one o'clock. So you don't be ashamed. You're not the only one. I'm not ashamed. It just doesn't

happen. Well, for New Year's resolution. I mean, I appreciate all the Nick Jonas pictures people send me. They're very nice. You literally told us. I'm a big fan. No, I did not. As if a big fan. No, I did not. As if I would. No, I did not.

I think you did. I think you did, but also in my mind does this thing where if something's said enough, it just creates the memory. Yeah, same. Like those fake memories you've got where you think you were somewhere, but you weren't. You've just heard the story, so you've put yourself in it. Something that's called narcissism. Yeah, right.

Yeah, right. Yeah, right. Yeah. Okay. There's other, there's lots of other. It's really, really interesting. Not a lot of it can be. Definitely not that by the sound of that noise. They've got categories viewed the shortest.

So this is the amazing thing. They've got so much, so many stats. So someone was like, oh, okay. No. many stats. So someone was like, oh, okay. No. No, I think someone was like, oh, okay. Okay. Like they enjoyed it too much. Right. But then, yeah, categories viewed by the –

You can't tell us what that category is. I can't tell you the category viewed by the shortest. No. But I can tell you the category viewed by the longest. Can you just show me because I need to know? Okay, you've both made that noise. Let's just say they sell them at a stationery store. Yeah.

Okay, I need to know now. What is it? Good Lord. Okay. Yeah. Seven minutes, 23. It's down 21 seconds, so it must have been a great year for that. Good vintage.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. So a man in Uganda, Uganda. so it must have been a great year for that. Good vintage. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. So a man in Uganda, Uganda, he has claimed that he can save his village and maybe this is something that the world can look into. So he has done something single-handedly that he thinks is killing mosquitoes within a six metre radius. Well, that's good because that's some of the biggest carriers of disease.

So yeah, he's saying no one in his village has caught malaria and he is the reason why. So he has said... Sort of set Chanel a candle. Close, sort of. He has said his farts are so toxic that they are killing mosquitoes if they are within a six-metre radius of him. His claim has not been scientifically proven yet,

but it hasn't been disproven. It's a bold claim. I don't quite know what he's eating to have these toxic farts, but he's quite proud of it. He's sure this is the reason. I think maybe you could go over there and do some good, Vaughn. I would need a good source of protein. Oh my God, there.

But have other people complained about the stink of his farts? So, apparently he is respectful of people around him. He will only fart when there are mozzies around, which bring malaria. Because he knows that his farts get rid of the disease but he's also aware that they don't smell very nice. So he's respectful with his farties. That is so weird.

And then they're like, let's get out of here. Oh God. And a local chief said that he'd heard about Joe's gift. Gift. And they took him to help get rid of the mosquitoes that were infesting the surroundings. And they all believe that he is quite gifted in this sense. What is he puffing out of his bottom?

What is there? What is in there? Oh, no. Citronella. It doesn't explain what his diet is. Is he eating a lot of citronella? ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Who knows? Citronella. It doesn't explain what a diet is. Is he eating a lot of citronella? ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

Time magazine named Greta Thunberg their person of the year earlier this week. One of the other people that was considered for the role, because it's not always, like, great stuff. Let's not forget Hitler was one. He was one. Yeah. Hitler's been on. It's just someone who has made an impact. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good or bad. Good or bad. Yeah. Hitler's been on. It's just someone who's made an impact. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Massive, massive impact. Good or bad. Good or bad. Yeah. So Time Magazine, it's Greta. One of the other people was Donald Trump. Yeah. He's not happy about losing to a 16-year-old.

He's been, he was 2016, the year he won the, was that the year he won the election or the year after? He was the person of the year. Right. For bad. Yeah. But he just believes that it's for good, right? He'll just see the cover after. He was the person of the year. Again, for bad. Yeah. But he just believes that it's for good, right?

He'll just see the cover and be like, yeah. That's good. He believes he should have the Nobel Peace Prize. That's really cute. The man's deluded. So he,

somebody tweeted congratulating her on Time Magazine's person of the year. He replied to that tweet saying, so ridiculous. Greta must work on her anger management problem and then go to a good old fashioned movie with a friend

Chill Greta, chill This is a president of the United States I know, but even if it wasn't a president of the United States It's a 70, how old is he? 76? Something like that Year old man attacking a 16 year old? Who cares about our planet because it's absolutely screwed Yeah

And we need to do something about it? Yeah. But also, if it was an older man speaking like that, would she still be considered to have an anger management problem? Is it because she's a young girl?

Is she can't? Oh, yes. She's not allowed an opinion. He speaks with far more anger. Anyway, you're not going to change him at some point changing that.

No. Even attempting. It's a lost cause. Anyway, you're not going to change him at some point changing that. No. Even attempting. It's a lost cause. So, yeah, he attacked her. And so she did, as she did previously when he went on Twitter, she changed her Twitter bio to Greta Thunberg, a teenager working on an anger management problem, currently chilling and watching a good old-fashioned movie with a friend.

I love that. So the image on Time magazine was, you know, her, the White House or something. Was it Trump? Someone in Trump's team? Photoshopped his head onto her. Yeah. And then shared that. Nuts, eh?

This is the world we live in now. Wow. Most unusual. I love that it doesn't let it bother her though. She just carries on. She said she's previously described her Asperger's as a superpower. Yeah. Because she doesn't take all of it on board.

Yeah, it is her defence. Yeah. It's amazing. She doesn't take it personally. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six. Hello there. Rick and Morty have teamed up with Pringles to release a Pickle Rick flavoured chip.

If you've not watched Rick and Morty, Rick turns himself into a pickle one episode to avoid having to go to family counselling. It's a weird show, but it's so great. It's such a good show. Season four should be on Australian and New Zealand Netflix before Christmas sometime this month. They said.

I think it was December 20. Are they? Yeah, because they've been drip feeding episodes. Yeah, they've been dropping bits. But I think this season only had five episodes, so they'll be probably all out. And is Taika Waititi? Taika Waititi's in an episode where all the aliens on a planet are New Zealanders.

What? Yeah. Such a good show. Yeah, so Pickle Rick flavoured Pringles when? Because they're being released overseas

so it might be one of those ones where we don't get it because there's some ingredient in it that our health and food safety people will be like It's usually colour isn't it?

You can't eat that That red colouring we're not allowed It's getting a full Rick and Morty themed commercial during the 2020 Superbowl Wow

When does that normally happen, Super Bowl? Start of Feb. Okay, so a little wait. Yeah. Okay, for your pickled flavoured Pringles. So I've got the top six other Chippy TV collabs. Number six on the list is a Game of Thrones inspired chip. This is the White Walker Pepper.

Oh, yeah. So it's like white pepper. White pepper flavoured chip. You don't see much white pepper now. Is that a growing up white pepper thing? A powdered white pepper. Oh, oh, yeah. So it's like white pepper. So white pepper. White pepper flavoured chip. You don't see much white pepper now. Was that a growing up white pepper thing? A powdered white pepper. And that Greg's shaker? Yeah.

It's not as strong, right? I think that's why parents have it, yeah. Yeah. I always associate, that's the pepper that makes you sneeze. Yeah. Because it was so dusty and fine. Whereas a grind. Tell me when.

Get on the grinder. Yeah, get on the grinder and you won't be disappointed. Tell me when. Get on the grinder. Yeah, get on the grinder and you won't be disappointed. But also it doesn't make you sneeze, I don't think. Right. Number five on the list of the top six chippy TV collabs is from the Disney Plus show The Mandalorian. Oh, okay. Megan, what's that Greek word that I can't say?

Tzatziki. Tzatziki. Tzatziki. Tzatziki. Tzatziki. Tzatziki. Tzatziki and Baby Yoda Gurt flavoured chips. Oh, that's good. Yeah. A little bit of a...

Baby, you can't do a list there. You can't do any sort of list without some sort of Baby Yoda reference. God, you have to get around copyright issues for that one, though. They'll be on board. Right. Disney love making money. Oh, they love a bit of merch, don't they? They love.

Love. Disney. So I went to order the Baby love making money. Oh, they love a bit of merch, don't they? They love. Love. Disney. So I went to order the Baby Yoda pop vinyl. Oh, yeah. Because it was like express shipping. I was like, I've gots to have it. Yeah. And I went in and it's like, yeah, we'll express ship this,

but it's not released until April 2020. I was like, don't tell me express shipping, but express shipping is like five months away. Did they not know that was going to be cute and big? No, they didn't want anybody knowing about it. It was the huge secret of the Mandalorian. Oh, right. Was that there was a baby, I'm ruining this, but I mean

come on, you've been on the internet. That there was a baby of the same species as Yoda. Right. That was like no one knew. You're telling me you can't just crank up some factories in China to make baby Yodas for Christmas when it's November. Pump them out. Lots of pre-orders happening.

Number four on the list of the top six chippy TV collabs is from The Handmaid's Tale. This is called Sour Cream and Under His Chives. Oh, my God. Good from you. Yeah. That was a hearty laugh from me. That was good.

Okay, I'm pleased. We're done. We're done. Well, I like to think I've got a couple more in there. Okay. A couple more in the barrel, but that's one of the strong ones. You can imagine the packaging, too, and the red. Yep.

Oh, yeah, good. A bit hot playing. Good marketing. Number three is from Stranger Things or St... No, Statangy Things. It's the upside down chip. One side of the chip is sweet, the other

is tangy. Oh, that's a good idea. By the upside down. Remember sweet and tangy chips? Yeah, we've spoken about this. There is not a good sweet and tangy chip on the market as far as I know. Were they Munchos? No, not Munchos. They were Kiwi chips.

Yeah, they were yum. They were the purple packet. I miss those. Sweet and tangy, man. Yeah, they were good. Bring those back. Write that down for next year. Bring back the chip.

Bring back the sweet and tangy. Let's get a bring back campaign going early in the year. At least a month worth of radio taking care of. Planning ahead. I was going to say Caitlin, write it down, but she won't be here. She can still write it down and post that note somewhere. Number two on the list of the top six chippy TV collabs is from a show favourite show, Fleabag.

It's called the hot and spicy priest flavor. It's jalapenos. Is there like a priest? Have you ever watched Fleabag? No. What? I know, I know. You would love it. Yeah, I'm going to get around to it.

Absolutely love it. I don't know. Oh God. The only thing is you've going to get round to it. When? I don't know. Oh, God. The only thing is you've got to get Amazon Prime, but it's so cheap. Amazon Prime's free for a week as well. So download Amazon Prime and just hit everything you want to watch. 20-minute, half-an-hour episodes, so you can easily smash out two seasons in a weekend.

I did. If you haven't seen that, oh, my God. And then get on to Killing Eve. I started Killing Eve. I think you overrated that No It's really good And the number one chip On the Top 6 Chippy TV Collabs

Is a chip from the Chernobyl TV Oh okay It comes in very plain packaging Yeah Because it's Soviet Russian Yeah And it says Three rhodogens max Now here's the surprise about it You're like And it's soviet russian yeah and it says uh three rodogens max now here's

the surprise about it you're like and it's like nothing to say you put the chip in and it melts your face i thought you were gonna say when you open it it explodes it explodes blinds you and then you eat it it's the hottest chip ever but oh yeah plain packaging. Three rhodogens. Rhodogens max. Nothing to worry about. Is that like bird's eye chilli? Yeah. And just... And there's a Russian guy behind you saying, I've seen better, I've seen worse. That is today's top six. So, to bring you up to speed,

Fletch and I have both engaged in laser hair removal this year. Oh, why? What's this bad news? You said you got bad news. Well, I got bad news. It's good. Well, it's not. Yeah, it's not the worst news.

It's not like it doesn't work or whatever. No, no, it's been working great. Because you saw it. Who shaves your bum before you go? Do you do it in a mirror? Oh, my God, yes. Because you've got to shave it down with like a razor. I feel we need some backstory here. because you've just jumped in hot here.

What is the backstory? Well, Vaughn signed me up as a laugh, didn't he? And now I have to keep going. And you hate it. And you hate it. And you hate it. It's definitely not something you could just cancel and be like, oh, I'm not down for this. Yeah.

That's not a thing at all. Well, yeah. Okay. Well, I mean, it's certainly worked. So we go to Off and on. Yep. And I've been getting waxed there for ages. And you were like, I want to do... And they said if you considered this, you'd be a good candidate

because you've got pale skin and dark hair. So that's how it works. The laser zaps it. So you've got to shave it before you go. Now, I get Sade to do mine. I said to her the other day when she was doing it, I was like, do you imagine... Did you imagine when you were a little girl that you grew up and married your dream man that one day you'd be shaving his back

in a shower on a Wednesday? Yeah. What did she say? She said, I can't say I ever thought about it. No. But she didn't mind it. She's very accommodating. Yeah.

And so yesterday I shaved because of the reason I asked. I do the butt myself. Yeah. And the mirror. Yeah. Why don't reason I asked I do the butt myself and the mirror Why don't you get her to do the butt? She's suffered enough She's done the back She shouldn't have to go through that So I do the butt

Okay, so you just do your own butt But what's the bad news? So I shave on Wednesday I go yesterday I'm getting the tick, tick, tick and then you talk to them because they're about to see Yeah, yeah. But what's the bad news? So I shave on Wednesday. I go yesterday. I'm getting the tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. And then you talk to them because they're about to see your hanus. So you talk to fill the awkward silence. I feel we talk too much about our personal stuff on the radio.

You are the iceberg that sunk the Titanic when it comes to your personal life. There is so much below the surface that we're not allowed to, that we can't see. This is the only personal thing we can dabble in. Because I don't like, I'm a private person. But you chose radio. I didn't know you have to talk

about getting your butthole lasered. So I'm talking to the laserologist. Yep. And I say, oh, so you know what's happening? She asked me what's happening over summer. I tell her, I said, oh, what's happening with you?

All the meanwhile, she's looking at your butt. Not yet. She's got my back. Because I get my back and my butt done. So my conversation's probably lengthier. My butt, my something and my neck. And so I say, what are you doing? And she said, I'm moving to Sydney in two weeks.

Oh, for crying out loud. Which means come the new year, your next laser session, it's going to be a new person seeing your bunghole. This will be the third person. I know. Three more people than I thought would see my bunghole in my life. They'll have had a more in-depth look at it than anybody. There's nobody.

I don't see it because it's behind me. I see it in the mirror when I'm shaving it. Sade doesn't want to look at it. Sade doesn't. I can't say she's ever said, give us a look. Yeah, right. Next year, this will be the third person. Now, they're always professional. They never say anything. I feel

sorry for them more than you. This girl, when she came on, I think because she's done, this is the second time she's lasered me, she said, last time she was like, nice, when she was back there. And I was like, beg your pardon? And she said, really good job shaving. Right. So not about the actual butt.

Not too much touch-ups. She wasn't talking about the actual butt. Well, I like to think it was half for the shaving and half for the butt. Okay, yeah, right. Because you don't say it that often, but you want to know that it's not nasty. Oh, but God, that's horrible. So this is another person. So the news that I have to break to you is come the new year,

a third person is going to be, well, I mean, who knows? Subjected to your butthole. Someone's going to see yours between then and now, but in a professional manner, a new person is going to see your butthole early 2020. I mean, I can't speak for what happens between literally when you fly out after the show and when you return hours before the show starts next year. Excuse me.

Stop right now. Thank you very much. But yes, it's very well travelled. I mean, you're very well travelled. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. In Australia at the moment, two British backpackers are making their way around the Perth area, Wolf and Wanderlust.

Actual names. Or nicknames. Is that their Instagram? That's what they go by. No, no, no, no. This has come from an Australian Facebook page where backpackers look for work. Australian Backpackers 2019 is the page. They better update that soon. So they're travelling around and they're struggling to find work. They have worked in the body

piercing industry back home, traveling around now. They are looking for work and they're struggling to find it. They have body modifications. They've got lots of tattoos, facial tattoos, lots of piercing. As I said, they're professional piercers. I feel that people are

okay with that. Yeah, I feel like we're a pass. Especially in New Zealand and Australia, a lot of tattoos and piercings. Tongues are split down the middle. What do you mean split? You know how they make it a bit snaky. Like a snaky tongue. Now they're saying that they have been travelling Australia for the

best part of a month and they're struggling to find employment. Because they look like lizards. That's the general feedback from people. But then like people are commenting on this They've been asking them what kind of jobs they've been going for Because in Western Australia and Perth at the moment There's lots of jobs coming into summer and the harvesting season There's heaps of farm work and picking jobs and factory jobs

And they don't care what you look like on the orchard do they? No, no. Somebody said it would be interesting to see what list of jobs that you've actually put your hand up for because regardless of what you look like when you're, I was going to say transient, but like when you're moving, when you're on the move and you're travelling and they don't know how long you're going to be there,

it's hard to get a job regardless of what you look like. Yeah. Because they don't know if they're going to invest time in training you to do something and then a month later you're gone. Would you hire someone like that at your cafe? Fletch, I would hire anyone who wants to do the job. Who wants to turn up every day, get paid and do the job. But if somebody like was travelling and said, oh, we're just travelling around and nothing's in concrete,

that's going to make, regardless of what they look like, that's a less attractive proposition to an employer, isn't it? Yeah. But if you have an agreement that it's going to be for this amount of time, then you've got the opportunity at the end of that time to find someone else. Right. And I wouldn't care if I was at a bar and some backpackers had two tongues and

piercings. I don't care. Make the coffee or pour the drink. Actually, you know what? They look like they'd make a good coffee. You know how someone just knocks the... You go to a barista and they're clean-cutting everything. You're judgmental to the clean-cut ones now. No, I know.

Yeah, that's not fair. Reverse judgment. Because would you think Mr. Toyboy can make it? He makes an excellent coffee at the cafe. But he doesn't have piercings. He's also Cliff Curtis. What? He could be from a coffee-growing nation.

He could be South American. He could be from the coffee belt. Yeah, right. So he'd be okay by me with coffee. I'd be like, I trust this guy. I know what's going on here. But if they look like a librarian, because they've gone too far like a librarian,

I'm like, what do they know could look hipster nerd but if you just look really standard and you're standing behind a barista machine I'll be like no no no no

get tats in because it's when you stop at a little cafe run by a couple of boomers and Barbara's behind the espresso machine you know you're getting a big cappuccino

with a lot of milk so maybe you are right to judge you're like can I buy a long black not in this town you are right to judge. You're like, can't I, I'm long black, not in this town you can't. Oh, the coffee, yes. Yep.

All right. On your babs. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan's Spark Surprise Box. Oh, okay. We've got something pretty special now. We,

we do. We've actually, Megan, you're on your Mariah Carey microphone. Yeah, can you hear the difference? I'm on a handheld microphone. Oh, who am I? Michael Bublé microphone.

Oh, rate yourself. Oh, excuse me. You're not the boobs. Mariah. No, you're not the boobs. You're Adam Levine from Maroon 5. We're in transit now. Vaughn and I are actually leaving the studio.

Okay, you're going into the producer's booth where it is. This is a mess. It's Caitlin's last day. Cameras and stuff are here. We've got some guests in studio. Hello, who are you? Hi, Robin. Hi, Robin.

Hello, who are you? Natalie. Natalie, hi. How are you? Hi, Carolyn. No, I said how are you. It was a trick. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Carolyn. And they've actually won a competition to watch a show. Well, yeah, Robin's here and she's brought a couple of friends on the worst competition ever to win a chance to watch us show. Well, yeah, Robin's here and she's brought a couple of friends on the worst competition ever to win a chance to watch us talk in the morning. How's it been so far, Robin?

It's a bit chaotic, but fun. Funny to see. Right, okay. Well, you know what? There's a little bit more to it. Do you guys all want to come with us out here? We're just going outside now, Fletch. Okay, boy.

We might walk through a broadcasting dead patch, but maybe not. We're just taking the three of these women outside. They're actually not here to watch the show. They're here because of the Spark surprise box. And you might remember last week, they can't hear us, can they? No. They might remember last week we flew somebody home for mum from the Goldie to be together for Christmas and we are doing the same now. Yeah, so we said that Robin won the competition, but this actually has nothing to do with Robin.

It's actually all about you, Natalie. Natalie, what's running through your mind? Natalie's running away. She's running away from me. I said running through your mind, Natalie, not running away. What's going on? Hey, Nataliealie come out here quick hold my hand do you have let me take your pulse first of all i think your pulse is yeah she's racing the pulse is racing look at this what do you see what do you see oh a prezzy oh my god someone's in it it's a it's a big it's it is

you're right it's a big present i'd say the box is like a metre and, a metre twenty by a metre twenty by a metre twenty. Otherwise known as a cube. Do you have any idea what's happening? Is this my mum? Natalie, come and have a look in the box. Knock on the box. Come and knock on the box. Natalie's just in a bit of shock.

Just a little bit of shock. Oh my God, no. So what do you really want for Christmas? Is this my mum? I don't know. Where is your mum? She's in England. How often do you see your mum?

I only saw her in July. It wasn't that long ago. But is it a time of the year where you miss being home? I do miss being home. I love Christmas and I do love my mum and I do miss her loads. But how nice is it when it's not like freezing cold when it's Christmas? You're like, you've got to be my mum in that box now, you've got to work this up. Well, do you want to go and have a little bit of a look and open the box and see what's inside? Natalie's just stepping up to the box.

That's late. Give me a hug. That is edgy. Natalie's mum. Oh, my God, I'm going to cry. Oh, my God. I've been in this box for 24 hours! We actually shipped her here from England in the box. It was cheaper than a fly.

Do you feel sick? I feel sick. Oh my god! Look at these tears. I just needed to hold you. The universe gives me this. The universe just put me in a box and sent me to you. Well, actually, it was Spark and ZM, by the way. If you believe in that universe stuff, go on, Emma.

Sorry to... We believe in the universe stuff. We do. Get in the box, will you? Natalie. She wants you in that box. How do. Get in the box. We love you. Natalie. She wants you in that box. How do you feel? How do you feel?

I love you, Mum. Where's Robin? Where's Robin? Because Robin is the one who organised this. Robin was the one that entered you. Robin set you up. I didn't know nothing. She's so lovely.

I love her to death. So this was all you, Robin? Yeah. I can't believe it. I don't know, I'm not going to kill you. Robin, you had the chance to reunite with anyone for Christmas and you chose to enter and reunite your flatmate with her mum. That's pretty good.

Oh, yeah. I just love them to bits and, you know, they deserve it. It's all like a bit of a comedy show already with mum. I can see why they wanted her around. Yeah. I really want to get you both in the box now that mum's like, get in the box. Get in the box. How did they get you in that box, mum?

One of our big, strong security guards lift you in. Oh, there was a stool there and then they chucked you in. I'm going to get a chair. We're going to chuck Natalie in the box with her mum for a photo in the box. Well, Merry Christmas, Angie. Oh, Merry Christmas. Merry everything. Merry everything.

Merry life. Merry life. That's why I saved it for Christmas. I love her. Natalie's getting in the box with Angie. When you last saw each other, was it here in New Zealand or was it back home? When you saw each other in July, was it in New Zealand or back home? No, it was in Vietnam.

In Vietnam. Why? It made halfway. It made halfway. We did, we met halfway. So is this your first time in New Zealand? No, second. Second.

Beautiful. Fantastic. For Christmas. Came two years ago. Oh, that's fantastic. All right, well, this is a very sweet moment. Back home for Christmas. And all thanks to Spark Surprise Box.

You can wrap up any mobile this Christmas with a Spark prepaid gift box. You can add a Spark prepaid gift box for $80 to any install mobile purchase this Christmas. Tears all round. Still tears. There's a hug going on in the box, Fletch. Do you want to come out? There's lipstick all over the place, too. Do you want to come out and get involved in this hug in the box?

Seems a bit of you. Not very good at hugs. Fletch, Fawn and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Sometimes when I say Post Malone, I imagine him in one of those new posty New Zealand post e-scooters.

Wearing a helmet. Posty Malone. Posty Malone. I just thought it would be something funny to see. I think he'd be... He'd be down for you to come be – He'd be really personable and he'd chat to everyone. He would. And he'd say, oh, what's that?

And he'd go, I don't know. He's a stupid person. Every time he'd go. I don't know what's inside. I don't know. 34% of people claim they have been scammed. Okay. And this is through social media.

And I've actually wanted to talk about this for a long time because you always see social media sites pop up and they've got like something, some random thing you've never seen before in shops. And you're like, should I trust this? I really want it. Should I trust it?

And whether or not to buy something off an Instagram post. I mean, unless you know it's a legitimate company and site, you do feel like sometimes you're like, oh, am I rolling the dice? And they do like a little, might do a little video where it looks really legit. I've always find if you search and go like Trustpilot, there's that website Trustpilot and they are normally pretty legit. Yeah.

Kind of reviewing sites. Because usually if I'm going to a site that I've never heard of before or I think it looks a bit dodgy, you always check the returns policy and if you can contact them. Those are easy ways. Right, if they're contactable. But then that's also something fake you can list on a website too, isn't it? Yeah, but they never put any kind of contact,

any tangible contact details if they're scammers. Yeah, right. Or you can check those sites, those scam sites. But 34% have been scammed through buying on social media sites. Wow, okay. So they've handed over, on average, I'm trying to work out what that would be in New Zealand dollars, about 400 pounds.

So like, is that 800 New Zealand dollars? Each person that's been scammed? On average, yeah. Wow, okay, that's a lot. So a lot of them have said if they're handing money over via bank transfer and then they just never get what they paid for. Right. So do they normally do a bank transfer, not a credit card?

A lot of the people who've been scammed said, I mean, I don't think that's a rule, but that might be something to look out for if they're asking for a bank transfer rather than a proper credit card payment. Wow. I'm sure as soon as than a proper credit card payment. Wow. I'm sure as soon as someone knows a credit card's been scammed, they can shut that down quite easily, the merchant site kind of thing. And get it reversed. Yeah.

But if it – Crazy, okay. And a third of people – Because I always see things on Facebook, I'm like, ooh, that's neat. But then you look and it's like, click here to see more, and it's like some weird jumble of letters that doesn't spell a word. But if you can see the product name, then you can just search that product

and find like the legitimate place that sells that product. Do you know what I mean? No. Well, for example, I get this targeted one all the time about this thing that you plug into your drill and you can like dig into your garden with it and it'll break up hard soil. Isn't it funny

you get I get like new ponytail hair ties and stuff they know they know they're listening they know what we're doing

they do and so you could click on the link and go through to the website but I just saw the name of it and I just googled

the name and I found like a place in New Zealand that sells it rather than going through the sketchy looking website and waiting like

two months to arrive. The Fletch Vaughan and Megan podcast. Thanks to... Who left that email ding on? Was that you? Anya, I'm recording. The Fletch Vaughan and Megan podcast.

Thanks to Spark. Wrap up any mobile this Christmas with a Spark prepaid gift box. You can turn your dinger on now, Anya. Caitlin, this is your final day at ZM. You are leaving. You are going to study nursing next year and make the world a better place. And we have been reliving this week and

for the last seven or eight shows some highlights, some favourite bits. Sorry. I'm a little bit emotional. You're a little bit emotional. What did you do? You saw Georgia before. Yeah. That was enough to set her off.

And then my flatmate allocated. And I don't want to leave Auckland. What am I doing? This is such a mistake. No, it's not. No, I'm excited. I just want to point out that when Vaughn and myself walked in, and Megan, you didn't cry.

Well, I did because I saw Megan and she looks beautiful today again what am I a truck of rain you guys were alright we were alright you were alright guys

thank you so we're gonna save we're gonna save our nice words for a bit later in the show just after the news at 8 o'clock

and we've got another present for you today's present is a serious present it's an actual present oh okay from us okay not a silly present. It's an actual present. Oh, okay. From us. Okay.

Not a silly present like we've been giving you every other day. I really do like the Crocs. Thank you, guys. You're welcome. I've been wearing them. Not yet, but I will.

Oh, yeah, good. Actually comfortable. Actual words. Yeah. Legitimate. So we thought before we get to that, we'll relive, we've been reliving

some of your favourite moments, our favourite moments of you. Now, this favourite moment today, I believe happened after a Friday flashback and it was the Pink Song. Which was my emo throwback. It reminds me of an emotional time in my life. I believe you were working or you had a job that involved this song. So, like, that was when I worked at a cafe and I used to have to open the cafe

on a Sunday morning and it was like a restaurant at night so I'd have to clean the toilets and everything and I used to like jam that song by myself. Caitlin,

do you have an emotional song from your teenage years? Because I feel like you would have a good one. I sure do. The one that I remember the most is

Kelly Clarkson, Breakaway. Oh, why that one? Because the first line of the most is Kelly Clarkson, Breakaway. Oh, why that one? Because the first line of the lyrics is, grew up in a small town. Oh, and you grew up in Fairleigh. Yeah.

I got you in the fields. Oh, this is a great song. Because I used to run, like I'd go for a run, and I'd just imagine like going to a big town, and I'd talk about like glass windows, like high top buildings. We've got glass windows in this building.

You're all I know. Here we go. Here it is. Here it is. Grew up in a small town When the rain would fall down I'd just stare at my window I was such an emotional teenager.

We were. And I was like, Mum, I've got to break away. I've got to get out of this small town. I've got to be in a big town. I'm going to emotional teenager. We were. And I was like, Mum, I've got to break away. I've got to get out of this small town. I've got to be in a big town. I'm going to Timaru. Yeah. And after I've completed my broadcasting degree,

Mum, I'm going to move to Gore for six months. It's about time this girl got to the big smokes of the South Island. Baby, you did it, though. You did. You broke away. I know. I'm going to cry. of the South Island. Maybe you didn't though. You did. You broke away. I know. Yeah. I'm going to cry.

Have we done this Friday flashback? No. Because it's my wing. Are you going to cry? I just really pounded my wrong. Are you crying? I'm just really proud of myself. I'm proud of you too. I'm perfect with you.

Thank you. We're all proud of ourselves. We're all proud of ourselves. I've got a lovely wife and two daughters now. I didn't let her get me down. After I lied when I was 17, she doesn't clean toilets anymore. Yeah, Megan. We're all going crazy. Oh, my God.

Is that what we sound like? Yeah, yeah. Things were excitable. Sounded like a hoot. Well, Producer Kelly, you got out of that small town, didn't you? I know. I'm going back. Nearly. To a going back. Nearly.

To a bigger town. Yeah, exactly. So we thought this morning that we might as well play this song because it is your emotional song. It's my song. You're breaking away again. Yeah, I know, guys. I'm proud of myself again.

Yay. Good. All right. You should be. For Caitlin's last day Kelly Clarkson Breakaway ZM Grew up in a small town

And when the rain would fall down I'd just stare out my window Dreaming of what could be And if I'd end up happy I would pray Trying hard to reach out But when I tried to speak out Felt like no one could hear me

Wanted to belong here But something felt so wrong here So I prayed I could break away I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change And break away Out of the darkness and into the sun, but I won't forget all the

ones that I love. I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change and break away. Take away Wanna feel the warm breeze Sleep under a palm tree Feel the rush of the ocean Get on board a fast train Travel on a jet plane Far away And break away I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly

I'll do what it takes Till I touch the sky And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change And break away Out of the darkness and into the sun I won't forget all the ones that I love I gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change Bye. But gotta keep moving on, moving on Fly away, break away I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly

Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye Gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change And break away. Out of the darkness and into the sun. But I won't forget the place I come from. I gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change, and break away. Kelly Clarkson, Breakaway on ZM. It's producer Caitlin's emotional song.

She broke away from that small town, just like Kelly Clarkson. And now you're breaking away from us on your last day. Yeah. Oh my God, sorry. Oh, yuck, stop. I need a tissue. She hasn't been crying the whole time. She was just very inappropriate to me behind the scenes. Sorry, Flea.

We have to. That's what we do. It's our relationship. Is it? Vaughan, that's a paper towel. This is the best I can do on short notice. We don't have tissues. All right, we're going to come back next.

Producer Caitlin, it would normally be my pick for Friday Flashback. Yeah. But I'm giving it to you. Okay. So generous. So you get to pick. Vaughan's been helping me behind the scenes with this one.

Has he? So this is the last Friday Flashback of the decade. Why are you laughing? Fletch is going to hate it. It's like punishment for all the mean times. All the times you were grumpy,

hangry. What is going on? It's a little payback. Oh, really? Okay, well, that's next, and then we're going to say some nice words about Progesterone. Oh, do we ever do? Yeah.

Have you guys got anything to say or no, no? Oh, I've written a speech. Yeah, you've written it. Yeah, I've... Why'd you do that? Because we... Because Vaughn and I haven't written anything. We knew we were going to say something.

I'm going to speak from the heart. You're stuffed. Thanks, Andy. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan. The last Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan show for the decade before we come back for the new season next year. But producer Caitlin's last show with us. As our producer, she's in the producers booth at the moment.

I've cheered up a wee bit. There have been a lot of, you just, people keep arriving at work and you see them and you're bursting into tears. I know, I actually just love

the ZM family so much. It's really hard. I don't know. I honestly don't know. Alright, well, very soon we're all going to say some nice words

and then we, by the way, this gift idea, good idea, isn't it? We've got Caitlin a present. Did you have the idea? Well, you know, I'm not like emotional and... It was your idea. It was my idea, actually. Was it? Great idea from me and you are going to cry.

Oh, God. There's a softie hidden down in there somewhere. Nah, there's not. Somewhere. Moving on. Oh, God. There's a softie hidden down in there somewhere. Nah, there's not. Somewhere. Moving on. Friday Flashback. Now, producer Caitlin, I've just seen the song.

Yes, yes, yes. You're kidding me. I was actually, I'm not prepared. I should have said the stats and stuff. So it would be normally my pick for Friday Flashback today, but because you are leaving, Caitlin, you get to pick any song you want for Friday Flashback. And I shouldn't have done this, because look at this song.

I really wanted to... It's four minutes! That's good. We don't make songs that long anymore. It's so that we can all stand around and hold hands. No, this is something that I want to play for you guys in particular, Fletcher and Megan.

Because this is how I feel about you. Oh, no. Oh, my God, this is so lame. I've never seen anyone cry like that. I know. I think it goes without saying that I will always love you. And today's Friday flashback, Heston, I will always love you. And today's Friday flashback, Heston, I will always love you guys. You're being emotional, but Fletch is angry.

This is not a song. Don't talk over with me. Written by the lovely Dolly Parton. Turn the mics off now, guys. Let's enjoy a Friday flashback on ZM. But I know I'll think of you

every step of the way And I will always love you Will always love you You, my darling you Bittersweet memories That is all I'm taking with me So goodbye, please don't cry We both know I'm not what you, you need

And I, I will always love you I will always love you I hope life treats you kind And I hope you have all you dreamed of And I wish you joy and happiness But above all this I wish you love And I will always love you I will always love you I will always love you I will always love you

I will always love you I will always love you You Darling, I love you Oh I'll always I'll always Love You

It's Whitney Houston I will always love you On ZM It's Friday Flashback today Wait wait wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. There. There. Now I can go?

That is the spot. Producer Caitlin, your last day here with us in the ZM family, and you got to pick Friday Flashback. 100% positive feedback. Yeah, I don't think anyone's going to say anything negative, are they? Why? It's a good song. It's a lovely song.

It's not on the internet, so. True. There are still places where people can be nice. Who knew? Well, producer Caitlin. Yep. It's the last day. It's the last hour.

Just a real quick question. Why do you always get real sweaty when you cry? Like, so sweaty. And it's the worst sort of sweat too. It's like a sticky. You can't bargain with it. You can't bargain with it. You can't wipe it away.

It's your whole body crying. Or deodorant away. My forearm's are crying. It's really gross and weird. Now, I've made a bit of a call on the organisation here. I will say some nice words.. I will say some nice words. Bourne will say some nice words. We will play a song and come back.

Megan will say some nice words. And then we will give you a present and there will be more emotion. That is the mood being stripped from the room through strict organisation. And look at him crossing his arms. You feel very uncomfortable. I know because I don't know what to say. I'm not very good with words. You'll be great, babes. I can't know what to say I'm not very good with words you'll be great babes

I can't wait for that when someone's going on a bit too long and Fletcher do the you can never hear it on the radio but he winds his finger around or taps his imaginary watch

get a friggin watch man an actual watch show me a number or just tap your wrist because I could just take that as lunch is coming up and I'll just keep talking until lunchtime. You get the message. Okay. When you try.

Well, you know, I mean, it's not like Caitlin's not crying, but this certainly helps the mood, doesn't it? No. I'm so sorry to everyone. How long do we have to talk for? Because I don't know. Stop delaying it. And I want you to look at me in the eyes.

It's real hard because everyone is watching. I'm going to miss you a lot. And I mean, I'm going to see you a lot because I've said you can stay in the spare room. Thank you. But no, I remember, I know I'm going to see you a lot because I've said you can stay in the spare room. Thank you. But, no, I remember when you were hired and they said, Caitlin's the new producer. I'm like, who?

And then I met you and I was like, oh, she's a bit full on. It's not Comedy Central, right? Oh, is it not? No, no. No, but very quickly, I was like, you are just amazing. And yeah, we are going to really miss you because you are the best producer we've ever had. Shots fired. I mean, I don't want to, I don't know what James thinks about that.

1.0 and 2.0. James, you'll leave me next year. I'll say something nice about you. I'll say you're the second best producer we've ever had. Okay. Give it up, honey. It's not your day. We've had five and you're not second best producer we've ever had okay oh give it up honey it's not your day we've had five and you're not even the top five oh hey he doesn't mean that hey um

but we've had so many adventures yeah and we've traveled together yeah um i made you eat chicken in cambodia yeah peer pressure you're great at Peer Pressure. I am. And we're going to miss our wine hickey lunches, our wine lunches. Yeah. And our adventures. Yeah. You already said adventures. Really going to miss you. Okay, that's up.

That was really nice, please. You're welcome, yeah. And I'll even probably give you a hug. Oh. Really? Can I have a kiss? No. Okay.

Give her a kiss no okay i will also miss your inappropriate comments it probably should go to asia like the one i received 10 minutes ago um it's my turn now you're done katie oh no Oh, no. You all right? Don't you cry. It was all laughs before, but now it's getting a bit much. I can't watch Dad cry. I held it together at the ZM party when everyone was bawling. I was the rock. Not the radio station.

I was the rock. Or the wrestler. Or the wrestler. Then here we go, bit of laugh. Back on track. Katie, you are one of the most amazing people I've had the pleasure of knowing in my life. And I say that genuinely, not just because you're leaving. I've told you this before. You have one of the most caring natures.

Like, you just constantly, time after time, put everybody else before yourself. And you're leaving a job with three high dependency units to give more of yourself to people that you don't even know like you when when you said you were going to be a nurse and i know from the night nurses strikes recently and stuff and just having spent time in hospital with uh when my daughters were born so that was only one small part of the hospital you this was a role you were born for that profession like there are there are people in this world like whenever we talk about nurses we're like pay them because you're born to do that and these people shouldn't get burnt out by the industry they should be cared for they should be resourced and you are one of those people that we refer to that it's just

got genuinely a heart of gold like my daughters they like i was doing it right before until sharday's messaging it and said that just really upset about you leaving those girls love you so much. You're genuinely one of life's good people. And we give you a hard time, but you just, whenever any guy locks you down, he is going to be the luckiest man in the world because you just, and

even, you don't need one, but when you get one, he is going to be the luckiest guy around because you are genuinely just the most giving, loving person. Especially in this industry that can just take all that you have to give. You've just given it everything. And I'm sure you'll do the same with nursing and you're just going to be the most amazing nurse.

And we love you so much. And we're going to miss you. And just smile every single day. We love you guys so much. And we're going to miss you. And you just smile every single day. I love you guys so much. Sharae and Ogi and Andy, I love you guys so much. And my deal stands that if you decide nursing's not for you, you can come back and work there

and we will pretend it never happened. Not a word. Like weird stuff that happens in cartoons that's quite crucial to the ongoing storyline that they never mention again. Well, mate, the listeners think you promised her. Yeah, yeah. We'll all just be like, we never mention the six months, 12 months that you weren't here.

Genuinely. It just means the world to me. Like, I adore you guys and just hearing those words. It's just, thank you. I'm so sweaty. Oh, Fletch. I don't think I want to follow that, to be honest. Dad had to cry.

Yeah, that was good. That was good. Needed one of those. It's been a little while. Oh, my God, Fletch. Are you crying? I did cry, yes. I saw some tears.

What, you broke him? Uh-oh. We just need to take a break and reboot our Fletch, are you crying? I did cry, yes. I saw some tears. What, you broke him? Uh-oh. We just need to take a break and reboot our Fletch. Whoa. I don't know how long it's because we haven't rebooted it for so long. Oh my God. We don't know. We don't know how long this will take.

Okay, we'll come back next and Megan is going to have her turn and then we've got a gift that you can take. I don't know, a gift. What are you doing with a gift? I'm just going to play the song. Okay. All right. It's Caitlin's last day,

so we're all just taking turns to say something nice about her. It is. You're next, Megan. Yeah. And then we've got a gift for you, Caitlin. Okay. And then get out because we're sick of crying. Yeah.

So I had to write something down because I'm not as eloquent on the fly as Warner is of crying. Yeah. So I had to write something down because I'm not as eloquent on the fly as Warner is. Sure. Yeah. Thank you. So I'm going to read this. It'll also help me get through. Okay.

If you need, I'm going to offer you a service if it gets too much and you need like that weird thing that people who think they're funny do is try to be funny. In between? If you need a break. Yeah, okay. Indicate to me.

I'll say something inappropriate to deflect okay to deflect yeah using humor to true emotion of the situation and i'm not gonna look at you caitlin but it's just so i can get through do you like some sad music okay i reckon her in that last part of your champ it's too auntie god make it on in Nappers too, Aunty. God, Megan only needs one. Hey! Holy shit! She nicked it. Oh, we got a situation on our hands. Aunty only needs one and she's out of control.

I'm literally not even listening to what you're saying. Go, you go. Dear Katie, thank you for bringing so much joy to people's lives. I've actually never known anyone who is so universally liked and who gives so much of themselves for the pleasure and betterment of others, as Vaughn said. I thought you were going to say as Vaughn. Oh no. Vaughn?

I didn't indicate. As Vaughn. It's always intriguing or maybe scary to know what people say about you when you're not around. I can tell you there is not one person at ZM or that I've ever met that has ever said anything negative about you. You make everyone feel welcome.

You go out of your way to support the new people in this building and at ZM. You make up for Fletcher's grumpy demeanour, how quiet Vaughan is when people meet him, and my horrific self-consciousness. And this isn't about me, but I do want to say thank you for being a sounding board for me. People don't see the times when I'm having, sometimes you see the times that I'm having a meltdown,

but there's a lot that you don't see. When I'm nervous about doing a break or when I need someone to give me a pep talk when broaching the serious topics, and Caitlin, you're always there. You message me from the producer's booth or you give me a cuddle. And I really appreciate it.

This is why no one should be surprised or concerned about your choice to be a nurse. You care so much about people, ones you've met and ones you haven't. I'm trying really hard. You're the only thing in any room you're ever in. And I mean that in the best way it's cliche but you do light up every room and just know when you don't believe in yourself

we'll always be here believing in you thanks for being the first female producer on the show, it's a tough friggin gig but you brought so much to our lives and to the listeners lives and to me personally, I love you and I'm so proud of you thank you Megan into the listeners' lives and to me personally. I love you and I'm so proud of you. I love you so much.

Thank you, Megan. Those words will always, like, can you email them to me? I wrote it in an email. I can send it straight to you. Can you email me that? It's the best thing I've ever heard someone say while crying. Crying. I need that to read back.

That being said, Vaughan's just going to get you a present. We're all still going to be friends. Of course. Of course. We've given you jokey presents all week, but this one's a little bit more serious. Okay. Feels like a picture frame. I'm row, eh?

Oh, sorry. Do you... Oh my God, it's writing. Do you want one of us to say what it is? Do you want to say? This was actually Fletcher's idea. He said, you know how much Caitlin loves Ruby Jones? Now, background, Ruby Jones is the artist.

Oh, my God. We had her in recently for a book, All of This Is For You, and it's this beautiful little book of just heartfelt messages on some of her artwork. Her most well-known artwork this year was the After the Christchurch Mosque Attacks, You Should Have Been Safe Here. This is your home, you should have been safe here. That famous drawing that ran around the world.

And Caitlin's such a massive fan of her book and loved her book so much. Time magazine cover. Yeah, we got in contact with Ruby and asked if she'd do a special drawing of us all for Caitlin to take with, with a little message underneath. And yeah, that's what Caitlin's looking at now. True friends are never apart. Maybe in distance, but never in heart.

Ah, flat head! I got a TikTok notification. I ruined the moment. We were having a moment. We were having a moment. We were having a moment. I just had the tears starting up again. I don't know if I can show that. Come on.

Come on. This is the most special thing I've ever been given in my life. I'll put it in my room and look at it every day. And just in case that's too big, we got you a small version as well. Oh yay!

Oh you guys. And thanks so much to Ruby who's busy promoting her book and doing heaps of stuff. Do you want to say anything Caitlin or do you want to save it for the last break? Or just do it now. Yeah, has everyone had enough of this? It's a bit melodramatic, isn't it?

No, you know how everybody's like, it's all of that time of year you need a cry. Everyone needs a bloody good cry. Yeah, yeah. Heard from some lads who are having a cry too. It's always good to hear from the lads who are just having a bit of a vent. Yeah, a bit of a cry.

Yeah, I mean, there's nothing else I can really say to you guys. Like, you know, oh, Mountie, sorry. Shit. Everyone's out in the producer's booth. I absolutely adore you.

You are my family. Like, I'm so lucky to have such a lovely family. Myself, but, you know, if anyone ever needs someone to love them it's the Fletcher and Megan show and everyone behind it, ZM

and yeah it is pretty crazy that I'm leaving such an amazing job with such amazing people but it is my time to move on and I will always remember just the absolute shenanigans all the times you've made me date people

and run around chasing all blacks. I wouldn't have done the last six years any other way. And I'm so grateful and I'm just so lucky to have you guys as my mentor. And as my best friends, I'm very, very lucky. Love you guys so much. We love you. Thank you.

We love you too. Fletch. Love you too. I cried as well. I don't know if you saw that multiple times. I've actually never seen that before. You're welcome. That's my gift to you.

Thank you, Fletch. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Now, today's Friday flashback and today's fact of the day are related. This is a fact of the day about the song I Will Always Love You. Whitney Houston. Because I've been listening to behind the scenes I've been cheating

on FM frequencies and been listening to a podcast. Oh okay. Dolly Parton's America. You're so weird sometimes. Have you listened to it Ross Bosses? Ross Bosses.

How good. I'm not surprised Ross Bosses listen to it. He's weird like you. A couple of weirdos. Listen to weird things. So I voice Dolly Parton's always been on my radar So he's weird like you. A couple of weirdos. A list of weird things. So I've always,

Dolly Parton's always been on my radar ever since I was a little kid. Right. I can always remember like the music and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, I can see the sniggering, the big boobs, sure. But this podcast is phenomenal.

Like it tells the story of her life and how she's avoided being involved in anything political. Yeah. It's just a really fascinating podcast. And one of the parts she touches on, because you might not know this, but I Will Always Love You, Whitney Houston version we played, was originally written and recorded by Dolly Parton.

Dolly Parton made three million bucks the year that Whitney Houston put that on the bodyguard. And it probably funds her lifestyle even now because that song would still be huge in royalties every year. So she was on a TV show with Porter Wagner who was this massive deal on country music and she wanted to go out and leave the show and do her own thing

and he kind of had stitched up her contract so she couldn't do anything without him. So when she decided she was leaving and she was just going to pay whatever had to be paid to get out of her contract, she wrote I Will Always Love You and Jolene, two of her most well-known songs, on the same night. She just sat down and cranked them out. Oh my god.

So she wrote this about breaking up with her business partner and a guy she'd been with for a long time. Now when it came time to do The Bodyguard, they didn't know that song was going to be in The Bodyguard when they wrote the script. Right. The song came about, Kevin Costner, who produced it,

but was also in it, met with a music executive who said, and he said, I've got this idea for the final song of the final part of the movie. You'd say the most famous part of the movie, The Bodyguard, and the song that lives on now that people don't even know it was a movie. He said, Dolly Parton's I Will Always Love You. So the music exec, the guy that was going to produce it, the producer, went to a record store and said,

I need a copy of I Will Always Love You. Now, they didn't have Dolly Parton's version. Right. They had a version from the 70s. Now, the version from the 70s didn't have the spoken part. You know where Whitney Houston says, I wish you the best. Yeah.

It didn't have it. So they recorded the entire song and that part wasn't in it. Then the music exec said to Dolly Parton, I can't wait for you to hear the song. And she said, I can't wait to hear Whitney Houston do the third verse. And he was like, what? Right. So there was no third.

So they had to go back and completely reshoot that scene and re-record the entire song because Dolly Parton wanted the third verse in it and the guy hadn't initially included the third verse. Right. Which is a spoken part of the song. An iconic movie scene. And that's kind of like, apart from the real high note that you hit, that's the part that really hits home in the movie and just in the song.

So today's fact of the day, multi-part. Dolly Parton wrote I Will Always Love You. And if it wasn't for her last-minute questioning of the guy that produced it for Whitney Houston, it wouldn't have the third verse. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Fletch, Fawn and Megan, the podcast,

ZM. That is the last show for 2019 and producer Caitlin's last ever show and last ever break with us. Should we have picked a better song than that one? Cause it didn't seem. Oh, like an emotional. It's like F you. F you.

And you, and you, and you, and you, yeah. Yeah. Because we'd gone through the grief, she'd played us the song, but then that song also played a part,

didn't it? Like you're just like, F you. Yeah. No. And not Vaughn. Okay. Any last words?

Well, I stopped crying because I've got a raging headache. She's onto the second glass. And I'm having... Shamps? Yeah, because, you know... And you...

Lady Di. Cheers to Lady Di. Raise a glass for Lady Di. Lady Diana. Yeah, wow. What do you say? Is there a song you sing? Like Old Ang Zine or something?

It's New Year's Eve, isn't it? Thank you everyone so much. The whole ZM crew is in the studio. In case you didn't hear that, we were. We had a very dramatic Saturday night. We don't need to do it all again. But how fun. Love you guys.

Should we do three cheers? Three cheers for Caitlin. That would be great. That's really nice. Okay, what do I do? You just sit and just take it. You don't cheer. I don't cheer myself. Absorb. You be the leader.

Three cheers. Sometimes I start a little early at birthday parties because I always want to be the leader of this. Okay. Three cheers for Caitlin. Hip hip! Hooray! Hip hip! Hooray! Hip hip! Hooray! And one for the ref. Hooray. One. One. One. One for the ref. Bloody South Islanders. Are we going to finish the show with a Christmas song? Snoopy's. Snoopy's Christmas. No. That has come in and kept us on the text machine.

No! Ross just fired me. Well, that is our last podcast for 2019. We do have some podcast goodness, though, still to come, including this Sunday, an Ask Me Anything with producer Caitlin. Yes, the questions were submitted for that. So we'll be asking the questions that people did want to know. Just a final special for our podcast family, you guys, for the year.

And also some best of podcasts over the summer break. Best of Megan. I believe there's a best of Fletch Vaughan and segments that we do. Is there? Like, yeah, yeah. That's nice that they managed to collect some best bits. Well, mine's longer than the Irishman. Love said, move over Scorsese.

We've got a best of born coming in hot. Great yourself. So we will be back with the first show for 2020 on the 13th of January. I believe it's the 13th or the 14th? No, it is the 13th because it's exactly a month. Yeah, so 13th of January we'll be back with the podcast. Have an amazing New Year, Christmas break and holiday season.

Be safe. Be safe, yep. Hope you get lots of pre-season, have lots of food. Yeah, Vaughn, any nice, what are you texting? I'm just texting, pardon me? The plumber, have you got hold of the plumber? Oh God, no, I haven't got that problem you texting? I'm just texting Pardon me? The plumber Have you got hold of the plumber? Oh god no I haven't got That problem sorted yet I'm just telling my

Stepfather-in-law We're in Hamilton I'm getting off the bus Vaughn's catching a bus today I'm catching a bus Why are you catching I'm finally getting my Land Rover That I inherited off my popper

But Like if I drove a car down there Then a car would be stuck there No but you drive your car down Drive the Land Rover back Get Sade's car Drive that down Pick up your car

Drive it back But then Sade's car is stuck there No but you've got your car back Drive the Land Rover back Now it's Sade's problem Right Just keep doing that Until it's somebody else's problem

Basically Right right No Roger that