ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - July 09 2019

Episode Date: July 8, 2019

Vaughan feels like he is being challenged at work, Am I A Bad Person and do you get excited about organizing your house?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music lives here. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. One minute past six. We're just making a joke that Vaughan always comes in like a bull in a china shop halfway through the news. You might have heard him chuck his coffee cup down. Bang around. I placed it down in a gentle manner. Someone had to plug your headphones in for you because you weren't ready. I would have got there in time.

Absolute bloody professional over here. Holding this place together. Yep, I am. You just bang around. Oh, you're saying you were? Yeah. Oh, you were saying you were? Because the Oh, you're saying you were? Because the news just keeps going. It doesn't stop for the break.

Yeah, it just goes on. It starts with no man, no woman. Exactly. Coming up on the show, we've got the top six. There's some Canterbury counterfeit cash doing the rounds. Now, this is a problem in Canterbury, but I don't know if you guys know how New Zealand money works, but you can use it anywhere.

You can, yeah. You can. You can use it anywhere. You can, yeah. You can, you can use it anywhere. Apart from that vineyard we went to that time. Remember how we didn't want my cash? Oh, yeah. Rude prick. That was quite something to comprehend. All right, you lot, listen up.

It's story time. All right, three news headlines. You've got to pick one of the following three, Vaughan and Megan. Headline one, exotic bird discovery. Headline two. Is that right here in New Zealand? No. Because do you, have you heard?

No. They've found another Kiwi family. Oh, I did see that headline. They found it down on the southwestern plateau of the southern island. Wait, these are different new Kiwi family. Oh, I did see that headline. They found it down on the southwestern plateau of the southern island. Wait, these are different new Kiwis. No, no, no, no. I believe they're a brand of Kiwi

we already had. Oh, okay. A species, but they're ones that we didn't know we had. Great. It's been quite a little discovery. They live in like this little valley or something. Well, they're endangered, aren't they?

So... The Kiwi. Add a couple more to the list. Very true, yeah. Which would be great. We'll be able to ruin that somehow, no doubt. Yeah. Stay tuned.

Headline two, man loses two Lambos in a day. Oh, no. And headline three, gift leaves hospital staff out of this world. I do love the story of someone losing two Lambos in one day. Yeah, because I get, like, you crash one, but how are you losing two? Do you want that one?

I saw a photo of a lakeside Porsche dealership yesterday where someone did a boo-boo parking the lake beside the Porsche for display. Because you drive on the road and then there's the lake and then there's the Porsche dealership. So, obviously, you look across the lake. It's quite lovely. Yeah. Someone went over the edge of it and into the lake and then there's the Porsche dealership so obviously you look across the lake it's quite lovely someone went over the edge of

and into the lake or they put a Porsche in the lake it didn't fly like a boat it's great when you see some rich

rich person's car rowing but it was probably just the person who works there oh yeah yeah okay

let's I'm going to two Lambos alright we go to the Lambos. All right. We go to the UK now where an uninsured Lamborghini has been seized by police after the owner used it to pick up his other car, which had also been confiscated for not being insured. So I didn't know this, but if your car's not insured,

it can be confiscated. What part of the world is this? This is in the UK. Greater Manchester Traffic Police. I didn't know that was the case in the UK. Because in America, they're always like... Papers. Papers, which means like insurance registration.

It's all included, isn't it? Third party's included in your registration. In Australia, third party insurance is included. It's mandatory. It's mandatory. So crazy that it's not here. Having two Lambos, though, and not insuring that. It's mandatory. It's mandatory. So crazy that it's not here. Having two Lambos though and not insuring that. That's madness.

The Lamborghini Aventador. I don't know. Like Matador, but Aventador. I know. I've seen it written down, but I don't understand. Yeah. I had a poster on my wall as a child. I had a Lamborghini Contage.

Right. It's a Lamborghini. It's a yellow one. Imagine a yellow Lamborghini. We've all got the picture in our mind. That's worth more than £290,000. And that was seized at the police station after he came to reclaim his other car, which has also been seized.

Was that a Lamborghini Aventura as well? Or is that a Lamborghini? This one here, it was a white Lamborghini. So I don't know how much that's worth. It's quite fetching and white, isn't it? It's very nice and white, yeah. So it's like, you read those stories about the wife getting done DIC after she came to pick up her husband who'd just been done DIC at the police station.

Yeah, well that's... Very similar stories. I just don't have any sympathy for someone like that. But yeah, apparently under Section 165 of the Road Traffic Act, a car can be seized if it's not... Insured. And neither of the Lamborghinis

were insured. No. Which is crazy, right? Like, how can you afford like $600,000 worth of car More money than cents. Yes. Am I right

like ensure your fancy car you idiot and how much would your monthly premiums be oh god

so much you ring up they're like do you park your car in a garage at night you're like

yup what's your postcode that's always very judgmental when you get a car they're like

oh you live somewhere where poor people live That love stealing cars Or something You're like Well no I

Okay yeah Alright Okay yes Okay Yes I do I take your point Yeah But it's still rude

Yeah Yeah Yeah You should be able to have A less insurance premium If you can prove You can parallel park And not scrape your wheels

As well Yeah That'd be a good little Insurance sitch. Yeah. I just want one Lamborghini. I don't want two. I don't want to be greedy.

I just have one. Just one in your lifetime. Has Hosking ever had a Lambo? I think so. Oh, no. Did he ever knick his head? No, Ferrari and a Maserati. I'm going to message Kate.

And a Range Rover. I just always look at his car like what he's bought today. Has he had a Range Rover? Yeah, he's a white Range Rover. Like a big Range Rover? Yeah. Little fella. No, I think that's his runaround.

You can't ask Kate how much the insurance premium is. No, I'm not going to ask what the insurance premium is. I'm going to say has Mike ever had a Lambo? No, ask him on his line-up at the moment. He defs got a white Range Rover. I saw him leave the other day. Definitely ask what a Maserati or a Lambo cost to insure. Maserati's the one that's the one he likes.

Is he falling on tough times with a Range Rover? That's his, like, runaround. I'd love to see him drive a Toyota Corolla to work. God, I'd love to fall on tough times, but then I had to drive a Range Rover. Bloody labour. I'm going to have to drive a Range Rover. Fletchforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. So a girl has created some art.

It's controversial. It's polarising. That's what art should be, Megan. Yeah, it's created discussion, which is good for art. You stand around and talk about what it means to you. And her name is Francesca. She was doing an art project. So she went on Tinder and she tried something different.

So she sparked up conversations with guys and then asked for DPs. Sometimes she didn't have to ask. Right, okay. But, like, she didn't get one from them, she asked for one. A DP being a doodle pick. Yeah. A DP. Sure, a DP.

So she's a fine arts student. It's not a doodle. It's a diddle. It's a willy. Grow up. Grow up and stop pulling the doodle. It's got a scientific name, a diddly-widdly. A pee-pee stick.

Oh my God. I'm really laughing at this. She had to say, send me a diddly-diddly stick. And guys would send them to her. Yeah. So she matched with six of them. How weird would that be? Just, oh, by the way, on a dating app, you're talking to someone and she's like, I think

we've got to the point. Would you mind sending me a diddly-widdly,dly-widdly stick you'd be like what i watch your bedroom so she matched with 600 men she um found almost a third of them um gave her what she wanted, what she asked for. And so she ended up with about 300. So from 600, there were 300 deans. So 50% gentlemen. But that means like, yeah, she must have got. She's turned them all into art. So she's painted them.

She didn't just put them straight up on like a wall art. No, she painted them. But she actually whittled them down to 140. Oh, imagine if you didn't have the cut. I know. That's what I was thinking. The cut of the penis. You're talking about like circumcised or not.

It doesn't look like she's gone for the prettiest. It looks like she's gone for a wide range of. So then it's like all different. Yeah. Very different. You've had a good look, have you? Yeah. Right. I mean, it's like all different. Yeah. Very different. You've had a good look, have you? Yeah. I mean, it's actually quite confronting.

But there's 140 of them. It doesn't say how long it took her, but, you know what I mean? She's 21. Yeah. So I don't know if she's living at home and doing that with Dad's like what are you working on sweater

Just some art Oh show me you know what I love Oh my god Where did all of these come from Producer Caitlin now that you've got a boyfriend Because people might not know this but you've got a boyfriend Do you miss that about the online dating world Or the DPs

No absolutely not. Especially not the ones that you didn't ask for. The non-solicited diddly-widdly stick pics. I don't know if you know this, but they're not that attractive to look at.

I honestly don't think I've had an unsolicited one. Well, you've never been single in the dating app world. That's crazy. And you've just pretty much ensured you'll get one. Don't send me one.

It'd be very hard to explain if I open that. In front of Andrew. Yeah. Well, just don't open your Instagram. Because then I'll be like, well, I talked about it on the air, but it sounded like I wanted one, but I didn't want one. But just don't send me one. All right.

Thanks. No, thanks. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the top six. Yes, hello there. There's some Canterbury, there's some counterfeit cash doing the rounds in Canterbury. Goodness, man. Now, I would have thought, I'm just looking.

For some reason, I've got cash. I've got a 20 and a 10. Megan's got a 100. Megan's got a $100 bill on her. How do you have a $100 note? It's from mum. Her mum gives her money. Yeah.

Your mum gives you money. Yeah, I'm her daughter. When she comes visit, But you have like a job. Yeah, but. And a business. No, but she likes to even it out. So like she gives my brother money.

She has to give me money. Why is she giving him money? Because he's useless. Says the woman also taking her mother's money. Well, she's giving it. I'm not going to say no, am I? Is your mum on the pension soon? Yeah. You're taking money from a pensioner.

You should be ashamed of yourself. She shouldn't offer it to me. I'm not going to say no. Doesn't she only work part-time? Or volunteer? Both of those things. So you earn more money than your mum. And she's almost a pensioner. We don't know that for sure.

Dad's got a full-time job. Isn't she kind and giving? Unbelievable. Thanks, mummy. So. Do you want to look at my hundy I would have thought this would have been

quite hard to counterfeit well you've got an Alsonian on the front there don't you Lord Ernest Rutherford a proud local it's a big window isn't it

I never use cash I know I haven't looked at this new stuff and when I say new stuff we've had this for a few years now I've had that in my wallet

for so long because I forgot it was even there. I don't know how you would counterfeit this giant window, which would be almost like an inch and a half long and nearly an inch wide. Oh, yeah. Well, it almost runs for the whole width of the night, doesn't it? And it's got some holographics in there.

Lacey, you can't tear these notes. Oh, don't. Yeah. Go on. Get a real, really try and you'll be able to put a little tear in it. Fletch, do not tear that. No, you actually, you can't tear them. Okay, that's enough trying.

You tried to tear the $100. You definitely can't. If you tear that, you have to give me one. No. So you can't. You stretch it and it warps a bit. Yeah, but you can't tear it. I literally, that's the only $100 bill I've ever had on my hat.

That's a sign it's counterfeit, as if you can tear it. Oh, okay. The moho is the bird on the $100 bill. I'd never know because, of course, the teatail. Is that the fantail? No, that would be the... Fantapehuakawaka. Oh, right, okay.

That's the yellow-headed robin or something. Right, well, so be on the lookout because apparently a lot of these have been handed into bars, restaurants around the city. So is that actually a thing you can tear them? Well, if it's counterfeit, yeah. I don't think you can tear those notes.

Megan, I'll give you these two notes for your one note. I used to say stuff like that to my brother. Honestly, this is a trick, mate. I do this to the kids all the time. I'll be like, do you want these two brown ones or just that one stinky gold one?

And they're like, oh, brown ones. Yeah, I thought so. I thought so. These are the top six ways of spotting the counterfeit cash in Canterbury. Number six, it says legal tender for $10. And then that's scribbled out and it says legal tender for $10. Right. So something a little bit casual on there. 10 bucks and then that's scribbled out and it says legal tender for 10 dollars right so something a little

bit casual on there and it says the reserve bank of Christchurch and then that's scribbled out and it says reserve bank

of New Zealand yeah number five on the list of the top six ways of spotting the account for cash

in Canterbury the little tiny writing like in parts of the notes there's like little tiny writing in patterns

little tiny writing in patterns and it of the notes, there's like little tiny writing in patterns. Little teeny tiny writing in patterns. And it generally says things that might say like an oath or something. It just says Auckland sucks lots of times. It's a giveaway. It's a giveaway and it's also a burn. Number four on the list of the top six ways of spotting the cannafrick. Cash and cannabrie. All the notes are red or black.

There's no blues, greens. Yeah. What colour is Sir Aparana Nata? Purple. He's a fitty. He's a fitty. He's a purple fitty. Yeah.

Number three on the list of the top six ways of spotting the counterfeit cash in Canterbury. It's not signed by the governor of the Reserve Bank. Because up there it says Reserve Bank of New Zealand Te Putia Matua and that's signed by Graham somebody. Jesus, Graham,

could you make it legible if you're going to run out of the bloody currency? But it's not signed by the Reserve Bank governor. It's signed by the wizard. Yeah. And it just says

underneath wizard. Is he still around? The wizard, I think so. Yeah. Does he do as much wizarding The wizard, I think so. Yeah. Does he do as much wizarding these days? The news used to always trot him out back in the day. Yeah, I don't know. I think Harry Potter took the wind out of his sails,

to be totally honest. Number two on the list of the top six ways of spotting the counterfeit cash in Canterbury, the clear see-through window we were just talking about. That's just glad wrap. You can easily poke were just talking about, that's just glad wrap. You can easily poke it with your finger. It's just glad wrap. You can probably see

a little bit of sandwich left on it because it's reused glad wrap. Yeah. And the number one way of spotting the counterfeit cash in Canterbury, Richie McCall's

on all the notes instead of the Queen. Flip it over. It's Richie. It's a dead giveaway, that. It's an absolute dead giveaway That is today's top six ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan

The podcast New wedding trend Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep This is interesting I wouldn't have it But it's kind of cool I'd like to go to someone else's wedding That had it

It is a bouncy castle So there is a company in the UK That started this A Wedding Wonderland And these are going crazy. These are customizable bouncy castles. They make them for your wedding. For adults, though?

Yeah. Oh, yes. And I was like, oh, okay. But then I see them. So these look like they're all white. So then I see them. Then I see them. And then I see them.

They're like bougie bouncy castles, all white. This one's got like a beautiful flower trim across the front of it. Right. Big like draping curtains. Like it's quite, as far as bouncy castles go, it's quite chic. Well, we hired one for your stag, Duvorn. Yeah, we were lucky nobody died. We were like.

All vombed in it. You know, you go on them as a cat and they're all fun. But when you're an adult, I don't know, there's something about them. You really get nailed. Even just trampolines as an adult. You're like, God, this thing hurts. And he swings as an adult. You go on a swing and it's like, oh, God, I'm going back down.

You go on a tramp or a bouncy castle and you twinge your back or your calf muscles hurt and you get puffed. You blow a knee. And then someone double bounces you as an adult. No, that's not funny. That's not a joke. I'm going down. Don't use that.

I couldn't imagine using a bouncy fun castle when you're in like a suit. Formula Tire. That's what I was thinking. If I was actually the bride, I wouldn't want to do it because you've got your big dress on. There are no shoes on. But they do look cool though. It looks really cool. Like, you've got your big dress on. There are no shoes on. But they do look cool, though. They do look... It looks really cool.

But, yeah, I mean, there's a guy jumping in with a suit on. But, I mean, it looks like he's going to burst a button. You've got to be very careful. Especially if it's a higher suit. You don't want to take that back to Frank Casey. A couple of burst buttons. Frank Casey's like, Bounce Castle. Sorry, mate.

Sorry. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, it's July and that can only mean one thing. We're planning our Christmas holidays. You always say if it's in one day, you need something to look forward to because it's cold and... Yeah. Yeah.

So this is the basis of it. Megan's like thinking the cafe is going to shut down, right, for a week or like from your Christmas till just after New Year's. Yeah. And Megan's thinking, and well deserved so, a holiday is in order for Mr Toyboy. He's worked very hard this year, little fella. For him? For both of us?

Yeah, there's no denial. Him though. You come here and then go there. So you've been places. Crazy now to think though that we're thinking about like what we're gonna do for Christmas and New Year's because it is there. So you've been places. Crazy now to think, though, that we're thinking about, like, what we're going to do for Christmas and New Year's, because it is July. So, Fletch, the travel agent, in-studio travel agent.

Just for a moment, I would just like to say, if you ever need anything travel-wise, like, your attention gets, like, really sparked. Like, you could ask me lots of things and you'd be like blah blah and then not interested. But if you ask anything about travel, you're like, let me look up for you.

A friend the other day told me that they got a flight in Europe for like, it was like four or five hundred dollars and I was like, what? No. You've done that wrong.

An internal Europe flight for five hundred dollars. Even I know that's a spinny. Yeah, I know. The business? No. I was like, look, talk to me before you book something next time. It's not Greece to Iceland or something like that.

That's probably the only flight. That would be a long flight. No, it's crazy. So it turns out that Bali is doable at that time of year. At the moment, it's still not too expensive. Oh, blah, blah, blah. Don't tell everyone that. But as soon as you get to December and January,

airlines, there's never a special. There's never a special. Why would they? It's Christmas holidays. The flights aren't cheap. School holidays are the same. Yeah. So Fletch said to Megan, well, there's these flights on Boxing Day,

but if you leave on Christmas Day, you can save $400. And then it's just turned into Fletch convincing Megan that Christmas isn't really that important and $400 is more. So you're doing the South African Christmas. Yeah, this year. And they do Christmas on Christmas Eve.

Christmas Eve heavy, isn't it? Yeah, we open presents at midnight on Christmas Eve and have like dinner together the night before. So Christmas Day, there's no present opening. It's kind of just a lunch. What do you do between dinner and... I just go to sleep. Midnight's so late.

We play games and hang out. Oh, that sounds horrible. So this is my... Megan could be at the airport at lunchtime for a two-something o'clock flight to Bali on Christmas Day. Which means I have to leave at lunchtime, like be there at lunchtime. Yeah, but that's fine. You do Christmas breakfast, presents and whatever.

You've already done the big presents. So you've already done that the night before. You're fine. You're going to save 400, nearly $450 by going. No, combined, 200 each. Can you imagine? No, you can't. But Vaughan, can you imagine you separate?

So it's a year on year off with families, right? Nelson with my family one year, Auckland, South African Christmas the other year. So the one time, like they get it every second year. And then this year we're like, hey, halfway through, or we're going to leave at like 11am to go to the airport. But also rate yourself. I wouldn't care as long as it wasn't my family. Yeah.

I'll always put myself in my family. Yeah. But also rate yourself. Do they even care that you're not going to be there? I mean, they probably care less about me, but I'd say that you could care about Andrew not being there. You get them. You've got them the night before and that morning.

And that morning. I just don't think that's kind of how it works. And you could leave to get to the airport and it'd take like half an hour because traffic's always pretty sweet on Christmas. So 11.30 we have to leave. Oh, I'd say 10.30. 10.30.

What have you got, Coro access? No. Because you want a good Christmas lunch in Coro. Whose side are you on, Vaughn? That's just, that's not going to fly. Megan, it's a saving of $450, nearly $50. Which is a lot of money. It's a lot of money. But it's just like, how am I going to get that across the line?

That's not going to happen. Like, what price tag do you put on an airful from your mother-in-law? Yeah. And then add South African tax on that. A South African airful. I mean, you can go there and a South African airfoil is worth more than like, because it's just standard like, I can't believe you're doing this.

Look, I can't believe you're doing this to us. Like, that's just a bit more jarring. I've taken a flight on Christmas night. I know, but people expect the shenanigans from you. And that was a saving of like $350. There's savings to be made flying on Christmas Day. And do they treat you

nice on Christmas Day? I'd imagine like that. Oh no, they just wear hats. They wear Santa hats. But the service is still the same but they're wearing

a Santa hat. But like the meals, is it like roast Christmas meal? some kind of chicken and some kind of beef. Oh, that's disappointing.

I just, but you're saving money. Yeah. You're saving quite a lot of money. I don't even want to be the one that brings it up, though. It has to come from him. Why doesn't the entire South African family go to Bali?

Then you get to holiday with them. So they don't only get you on Christmas Eve, they get you for the following week. Yeah. They can all be there. Okay. That'll be great. And then they don't miss out, you don't miss out.

You get to holiday together. Yeah. I think that's a great suggestion. Oh, yeah. The one time you get a holiday, stuff them. Just do it. Oh, I thought you meant you'd go on holiday with them. Book it and ask for forgiveness later.

Oh, my God, Fletch. Say you forgot what day Christmas was. Oh, isn't it always on a Wednesday? Yeah. And then put it back on them. Just say, if you want to pay the change fees and the fare difference, we'll be there for Christmas. Oh, my God, Fletch.

Okay. That's a hot point. And then it's on them. That's a hot point. I'll float it and I'll record the conversation. But now we've talked about it as well. People are going to be snapping up these barley Christmas day flights. So you need to sort this out.

It's really and it's not affordable. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan the podcast ZM. We are having another warning about an egg shortage. So we've already had one and this is another warning.

It's come from Gilmore's, you know, the big bulk purchase place where I got your marshmallows from. They sent out eggs. They do eggs. They do everything. I need to go. I need to come with you one day to Gilmore's.

Because everything at Gilmore's is like eight times the size of normal. So is it like when you get a tray of eggs, is it like a thousand eggs? No, you get a big box with multiple trays. Because how many eggs do you go? I remember you saying, but I forget. How many eggs would you go through a week or a day? Yeah. Oh, it's about 60 a day, maybe more.

Because this is my next project. Chicken, the chicken coop. Well, you're going to need to do this because what's the latest warning? That eggs are running low. Yeah, eggs are running low and they're going to be harder to come by because there's a change to the law. So farmers are struggling to meet the new resource consent. Farmers have been asked to give chickens more than like a centimeter on the sign.

Pretty much. So it is about animal welfare, which is good, of course. They need to meet a new animal welfare code of practice for layer hens, which they say it will drive up the price. A cage hens, in other words. Is that what you mean? Layer hens. No, no, hens that lay eggs. Just hens.

Oh, okay, right, right, right. Not meat hens. Okay. Egg hens. Yeah. Feather duster hens. So the price is going to go up a little bit and also they're probably going to be harder to come by

just while farmers are trying to sort their farm out. Right. So you do need to get chickens and lots because you're going to need to feed the cafe. So you need 65 chickens. No, you want eggs too? I want eggs, but I only use eggs at the weekend. I do four for breakfast on Saturday and then four on Sunday.

You have four eggs? So you don't do eggs through the week, but then you'll crank eight eggs in two days. That's good, man. I like that. Because what they say, an egg a day, right? And you are doing just over an egg a day, but you're doing it in two days. Like an omelette. I like that a lot. Because what they say, an egg a day, right? And you are doing just over an egg a day but you're doing it in two days.

Like an omelette or something. Or I'll do scrambled. Scrambled eggs don't go through in a scramble, do they? What happens to the eggs? You scramble two eggs, it's nothing. Yeah.

So four eggs is lots of eggs. But then if you had two poachies, it seems like a good amount. Yeah, you're right, but I don't do poachies. So I only need two more for you then.

Yep. Because they lay an egg a day. No, that's 14. It's far more than what you need. No, but that's okay. But then you can take the rest. So Megan can have some. Yeah.

Some egg, man. Okay. I don't know if I've got enough room for 60. So I mean, that sounds like you really... I've allocated, I stepped it out at the weekend. I stepped it out and I stood where I'm going to build it. And I was like, right, this is good. So I'm going to get some big poles.

Yep. And I'm looking at this as a great excuse to go to the higher pole or whatever, that place and get a post hole borer. Can I come? Yeah. You know what I'm talking about, baby. We might have oil. Yeah.

Who knows what's down there? I'll probably just dig some test holes around the place. Oh my gosh. And then just fill them back holes around the place. Oh, my God. And then just fill them back in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just to see if I can find treasure or anything. That'd be fun. I'll come out.

That'd be so much fun. Yeah. But I remember growing up, we had about maybe anywhere between five to six or seven chickens. And you get so many eggs. It's like you just become those people that give eggs to people. Yeah. And they love you. Well, because you get an egg per chicken per day, right?

Yeah, pretty much. And then you're not going to eat them every day. They get cut. You have to send them to a farm. Because there's no point in having them around. Or if you're ever on a farm. Send them to someone else's farm. Are you going to get big daddy chickens or are you going to get like bantams or something?

I'm not getting bantams. Oh. We're here to make omelettes inside an egg. Oh, I had bantams. I'd get bloody ostriches if I was allowed. What do ostrich scrambled eggs taste like? I don't know. Rubbish, I reckon.

And they don't lay you one every day. How many eggs in one big ostrich egg? Is it six or something? Hold on. I've actually seen this online as like a... Comparison chart? What do you call it when you change from one currency to another? Conversion. And how long would it take me to poach

an ostrich egg? Pretty a while. It sounds like it'd be rubbery on the outside. It's the equivalent to 16 chicken eggs. Okay. Sounds good for the cafe. Imagine you just whip up the whole morning's eggs with like four eggs.

If I was doing scrambled, that's fine, but I'd be there all morning trying to poach that thing. You'd go real rubbery on the outside and still be knocked out already. Right, so what are they saying in terms of like, if we can't have a chicken supply, if we're buying eggs, we just might be in for some shortages. Shortages and a price hike. But remember, we've got to think about the welfare of the chickens.

So this is for the best. Okay, this weekend we need to build your chicken hut. I can't go with the weekends without eggs. Yeah. It's on. Okay. Ariana Grande. Will I be able to like charge her back to work?

This has been technically a content mess. No. Damn it. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Yesterday on the show, we talked about Caitlin catching the bus to a sustainability chat. This was on in Auckland last night. We saw a bit of it on the gram, on Caitlin's Instagram stories.

Caitlin, run us through, how did your sustainability chat go? I noticed you wore your smart glasses. I did wear my smart glasses. Never a bitch. Never a lie? She did. She wore the glasses that make you look smarter. Oh, boy.

That was a conscious decision, right? Yeah, well, I wanted to look like I was fitting in. Well, I felt... Read it like a book. I felt very out of place. But actually, everyone was like my age. Why did you feel out of place? Because, well, I just didn't feel as smart, everyone was like my age. Why did you feel out of place? Because,

well, I just didn't feel as smart as everyone else that was there. Oh, but I was there to learn. Yeah, exactly. So you were a little,

you felt like you were maybe guilt tripped into taking the bus for the sustainability chair. I did. How did that go for you? And guys, the bus was much more convenient. I got on the bus lane,

so I didn't have to sit in traffic. I talked to my guys, the bus was much more convenient. I got on the bus lane so I didn't have to sit in traffic. I talked to my boyfriend on the bus. Was he on the bus? No. And had you needed to, you would have been able to charge your phone on that bus. Exactly. With the USB charging ports. Oh, I didn't see that.

Yeah, right. And then I also read a book. And I did all these things that I wouldn't be able to do if I was sitting in traffic. And then it dropped me straight outside the place that I needed to go. I just walked for like five minutes down the street. Okay. And then I even took the bus on the way home as well.

Well done. And I didn't have to sit next to anyone or talk to anyone. It was quite nice. That's about as pleasant as it can get on the bus. Yeah. No, it was actually really good. So, yeah. So the best thing about last night is that there was this 12-year-old boy that was there

who asked all the questions. And I learned a lot from him. It was so good because he was asking like the questions that I feel like adults would be too. You know, like I should probably have known about that, but I didn't. But he was asking. Who was in his ear? Like was mum? No, he was just very smart

He knew what was up. He was so woke. He was like what are we going to do in schools about educating kids on climate change and you know all this stuff and it was really eye opening. It was great What did you learn anything? Yeah so I've

learnt guys that I really want to be a... You've called me a couple of horrible things this morning. Well, you need to take a look at yourself. I don't know if that attitude's going to get your climate change people the support of the rural sector. We need to start pushing people if we want them to make changes in their life.

I would say support them in the changes. Well, I don't know if I support what you do. I'm not coming with some of the very harsh words. Okay, you two, you should hear what you call me every day. Okay, I've decided that I want to be a conscious consumer. Okay. And so just think about where my food is coming from, my clothes are coming from.

See, this is all great stuff, and I think the same, but it's so expensive. No, but it won't be if we keep doing it. And it's also, it's like, well, yeah, but do I want to spend all this money on this, like, or do I want to not spend all this money on this expensive product, but then children or people overseas are not getting what they deserve to be paid for what they're giving us? Like, it's kind of like, well, do I have compassion or do I want to be convenient and spend less money?

So you're wearing hemp sacks from now on? No, well, I mean, it's going to take a while. Like, it's going to be a hard thing to do. But you're going to try to. So no iPhone for you from now on? No, this is the bad thing. As soon as someone openly tries to make a conscious effort, if they're doing anything wrong, so if they're using an iPhone or whatever,

everyone jumps in on their... But that's what they were saying last night, is not everyone's perfect. No, exactly. And from someone who is perfect, I can tell you it's not easy. But if you keep trying, you might get there, maybe. We've got to support people for trying

and ways that they can try. And it was really good last night because one of the speakers was really hot. Yes, I can tell by the voice. So the key to sustainability and climate change is to have hot people. The key to anything is having a hot person. That's how we all signed up to Greenpeace, those hotties on the street. You don't want to say no to them.

Exactly. That's how they get you. Win for the environment, win for my eyes. It was a great chat, guys. That's how I had that small stint as a member of the Mormon church. Right. They sent the hot Mormons. Right.

They're like, do I want to talk about Jesus? I've got time. Come on. It's creepy when you say it. Tell me more about this mormone. Am I saying that right? I sure hope this pre-recorded laughing isn't after something

inappropriate to laugh at, but I just want to take a moment to say thanks to Spark for sponsoring the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. You can grab Spark's $29 prepaid rollover packs and get stacks of extra value. Back to the podcast. A man in New Zealand, it turns out for five years, was paying his neighbor's power bill.

There was a mix-up. I don't know how this would happen because you'd be reading the meters. Unless the meters were right beside each other. Do you remember when my power got cut off and I wasn't paying a power bill for like four months? Yes. Do you remember that?

And my neighbours were paying my power. They would have been getting a sweet deal because I don't have that much power. And that, what? Because they moved in, they moved in and thought that my meter was their meter. Ah. But it wasn't.

It was my meter. So they started it wasn't. It was my meter. So they started paying your power. Who was paying their power? No idea. Definitely not me. I wasn't paying anyone's. But they thought that was why. I do remember this.

But then I had to end up paying that power, which was fine. Yeah. And then I got some credits. Sweet. Got some sweet credits. A bit of annoying admin But It can happen But I wouldn't have let that go on for Like how long was this going on?

No okay so from between 2012 and 2017 So five years This guy was getting really big power bills Right And he's like this isn't right And he asked the neighbour and he said What's your power bill? Out of interest

So I'm thinking the power boxes must have been Like in your situation. Yeah. Beside each other. Or like units in apartments, they just have a room and they're all in the same room. So the neighbour's like,

oh, my Powerball's this. And it was significantly less than the man, but the person with the smaller Powerball had more people living there. Yeah, that's not right. This isn't right. So he made multiple complaints over the time, but in the end in 2017,

they checked and our electrician came and checked and said it had been cross-wired with the neighbour's property. Oh my God. So for five years he'd been paying Powerballs. It was actually longer. It was 2011. It was 2012 when he first noticed. 2011 to 2017, so six years.

I would have been complaining more. Did he not complain? Well, he did complain. He said he'd made multiple complaints. Yeah. Wow, okay. So then they offered him a refund because he worked out the difference and he'd paid $2,106 of power that wasn't his.

That was the difference between the two neighbours over that time. Yeah. And then they said, oh, we'll top it up to $2,500 and we'll take it up to $3,000 because of the poor service because he had complained and he was like nope i want three and a half thousand dollars which is how you barter over to the markets at the weekend where they start is not where they'll end yeah and where you start it's not where you'll end i don't like buttering that's the game it's so horrible i love it but no i don't need it that much that. I love it. No, I don't need it that much. That's what you say.

I really don't need it that much. And you turn around and walk away. You've got to walk away at pace. Wait, so was he asking for three and a half cash? He wanted three and a half thousand. Why doesn't he go, okay, yeah, I'll take three, but then I'll have another thousand in credits. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, maybe. Because I feel like that'd be more accepting of credit rather than like cash money. Yes. But you're still getting something out of it? Yeah, yeah, because credit to them is not that big a deal. So what did he end up getting?

He, a commissioner said that he would receive the $2,000 for overpaid and $1,200 for poor customer service. So again, in the middle, like I said, you don't start where you tend to end, do you? There's a bit of haggling there. But there had been multiple complaints. Do you think, because my Powerball's really low, do you think that's like I've got a crosswire situation?

No, you're a tighter. No, you don't turn on a heat pump, so we've covered this. You sit there in the cold. Yeah. With a jacket on. Yeah, but you'll buy shoes, but you won't turn the heat pump on or any heater. Yeah. And they're not warm shoes. No. They're cute shoes. Yeah, but you'll buy shoes, but you won't turn the heat pump on or any heater. And they're not warm shoes.

No. They're cute shoes. Yeah, they're cute, not warm. Yeah, but I don't pay much in power. I mean, I've got a sore throat right now, but it's unrelated. Mate, I've had a sore throat and I've been paying 500 bucks a month. Fletch was just hitting us with some riveting chat just before. Megan, what did you do that for?

Megan just flashed her entire chest at me. I was talking about Fletch's organisation and Megan just rips open her denim jacket and exposes her upper breast. Breast, soap too. No, because... Breastplate. Anya was like playing with her neck and I thought she was saying to me my boob was out or something.

Yeah, well, it almost was when you flicked open the... Lucky you. So, Fletch was hitting us with some thrilling chat before. Well, it is to me because I've never used this before. It was real cute. What you were talking about, I really like as well. They're lots of fun. Lots of fun.

But like, we're pretty rock and roll here at the show. We're very rock and roll. I'm in a gate chat. We're out of fun. Lots of fun. But we're pretty rock and roll here at the show. We're very rock and roll. I'm going to gate chat. We're out of control, man. Parental guidance recommended. I've been doing some Marie Kondo-ing. I've been getting rid of a whole lot of stuff. And I've been organizing.

I've got a lot of storage containers. And at the weekend, I got those storage vacuum bags. Oh, my God. They're a game changer. Is that plastic? Yeah, but they're reusable. Right. Reusable over and over again.

Okay. Don't rain on my storage parade. You could fit a whole Maui's dolphin in one. Probably could. You're introducing a lot of plastic into your house. You know when you've got your duvet inners and your duvets and stuff, your spare blankets and stuff, they take up so much room because they're all puffy.

You put them in these bags and you suck the air out of them with a vacuum cleaner. Oh, my God. I slide them right under the bed. Oh, yeah. So much free space now. Right. Because you're not taking up a massive amount of room.

Yeah. Oh, my God. So good. And isn't it amazing how much air is in a duvet or a puffer jacket? I know. You can put a little vacuum in there. Well, it's all air. It's like puffer.

And you're like, oh, that's getting small. But that still gets smaller and smaller. Oh, my God. It was so amazing. Oh, have you done a puffy jacket? I haven't done a puffy jacket. Oh, I reckon that would shrink down to nothing. I know.

It probably would. Yeah, I'll just do things to see how small I can make them. Because, yeah, I put the summer duvet in, the summer blanket. Oh, my God. It was nothing. It was next to nothing at the end of it. And then you stack that, don't you? Yeah.

And I slid it under the bed. Oh, so it's hidden. Because that's the thing. It slides down to almost nothing, but it's quite an ugly, like it just looks like a wrinkly old plastic prude. It does. So I'm sliding that under the bed.

I've made so much space. Marie Kondo would be so proud. So can you just, in summer, you just unzip it or something? And I guess you've got to put the air back into it somehow or just fluff it up. No, I've not done one yet. Equally as much fun. Or is it?

Yeah, it goes. But I've always seen them and thought, oh, that's such a mum thing to do. And now that I've got one, I'm just like, I've actually brought four of them. I've still got one left, so if you need anything vacuum sealed. Oh no, I've got like 18. Oh, okay. So you know the joy that this brings.

Wild joy, yeah. Oh, so good. But you could probably actually put the puffy jackets when winter ends into one. Yeah. Seal it up. Yep. Oh, so good. Or you could just put it in like the closet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, true. It got me so jazzed. I, so good. Or you could just put it in like the closet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, true. It got me so jazzed. I was so excited. You guys

weren't maybe, well Megan especially, you understand. Have you like labelled everything in your pantry? You want it under those people, like a Khloe Kardashian pantry? No. Oh my god. Have you seen Khloe Kardashian's pantry? No. It is like pantry gold. What do I Google? Khloe Kardashian's pantry.

It'll be there. It's not a euthanasia. It's all, everything's labelled. All the cereals are in matching things. All the lollies are matching jars. And she has everything in lines. She stacks her cookies in a cookie jar. It's OCD.

It's quite an OCD. Does she have OCD? I don't know. No, I just think it's what you do when you're rich. Like, surely her maid or something. Oh, yeah, okay. This is lovely. It's pretty amazing.

This is lovely. Because, you know, on our sustainability chat before, when you're rich. Like surely her maid or something. Oh yeah, okay. This is lovely. It's pretty amazing. This is lovely. Because I like it. You know, on our sustainability chat before, it would be nice to have all matching jars or whatever and ones like flour

and you take that down and you're like, no, no, thank you. Just put the flour straight in the jar. Yeah. But then you have to wait till your jar's empty

otherwise you're paying for a whole lot of flour. Yeah, that's true. Oh yeah, that's a lovely pantry. But everything's like all lined up. I don't's true. Oh, yeah, that's a lovely pantry. But everything's like organized. It's all lined up.

I don't label things. I'm not an organizer that labels everything. Because, oh, actually, just seeing, if I stroll down, she's also got a spice drawer. Now, we had one of those in our old house. New house doesn't have a spice drawer, but again, it will be there. This is a drawer like the cutlery drawer.

You open it up and they're all there. But you've got to find what spice manufacturer makes the exact things that fit perfectly and then you just buy all their spices. No, you buy like matching canisters. Are you just rocking them in the boxes or something? No, not the boxes, the glass jars. And then

you buy the boxes to refill the glass jars. Right. That spice rack, that was really, I loved it. Oh, yeah. See, you get into your organising. I love a spice rack. I think everybody gets into a form of organising. Like, I know a guy that had a,

it all is like nuts and bolts organised in the garage, fastidiously. Like in matching containers or something. Yeah, like all the same size and length and thread. It was a whole thing. And they were all in those little pull-out drawers and they had numbers written on the front that corresponded to Bolt stuff. Bolt stuff.

Like three-eighths. Right. And then you'd pull that one out and you'd be like, oh, yeah, three-eighths. And you weren't allowed to play with it. You weren't allowed to open them and take one out. Oh, no. It was like a and take one out. Oh, no. It was like a library of bolts. Yeah, right.

I don't think I'd have anything that I... I might be a bit of a messy puppy. I don't think I'd organise anything. You don't colour in your wardrobe? You don't colour in some more skirts? Oh, I know people that do colours. Yeah, that looks cool. They're like colours or certain segments.

Yeah. I don't have enough clothes that I hang colours. Yeah, that looks cool. They're like colours or certain segments. Yeah. I don't have enough clothes that I hang up. No, neither. It's just like big jacket, black, black, black, black, black, one white, the end. Yeah. That's how my hang-up clothes work. I'd love to know what's your organisational specialty?

Like what gets you going? Because like Spice Wrecks for me. Yeah. Sucky bags for you going? Because like spice racks for me. Yeah. Sucky bags for you. Yeah. Nuts and bolts guys. Storage containers. Storage containers in the pantry.

I couldn't do it because I just grab stuff out of the pantry and I just push it back into the shelf. Yeah, my pantry is a bit of a mess too. My pantry is a shambles. But I'd love to know what your organisation's specialty is. And maybe you're one of those people that everything's got to be matching. Yeah. Or you're an over-labeler and everything's labelled.

Our friend Alice just recently got all of her kids Lego. Oh, yeah? And got a box with heaps of dividers and put, like, all the green bits of Lego in one and, like, colour... I mean, it was a mess in just five seconds. But then every time they use it, yeah. Oh, yeah, no, it was definitely one of those things you do once. Well, you don't get dinner until all the colours are organised into the right...

Yeah. Imagine that. And in colour scale order, like the green blocks can't be next to the red blocks. It's got to go through the aquas, through the blues. All right, well, give us a call, 0800-DARLS-ATM-9696. How much of an organiser are you? We're talking about the organisation of different spaces, different areas of your life.

Maybe it's like we just heard from before. It could even be the beer fridge that you take the organisation on very seriously. I've had the vacuum bags over the weekend. Oh, just a space. I've been getting into more organising. Yeah. Containers. Love it.

Containers. Oh, yeah. I'm not a labeler though. Many are. Many, many are. Hearing from many people. Somebody said, I've got a workshop

and I'm pedantic about organisation. All of the tools have got their silhouettes. Oh yeah, you trace around the tool. Yeah, you trace around the tool and then you hang them on that silhouette all the time

and you can tell exactly what tool's missing because it's not hung on its silhouette. Somebody else said, I've got a craft room and it's vitally important that craft rooms stay absolutely

organised. I spend as much time organising it as I do actually getting involved in craft. Sarah-Jane, you're a big organiser. Are you a labeller? Absolutely. I am a custom labeller even. What kind of stuff

do you label? My pantry is all matching Tupperware containers with custom made decals even, not even a label maker. Wow. How does a how do you make a custom made decal for a

So I contacted a girl on Instagram and said this is the size space that my container has. Can you please make me some pantry labels out of this really pretty font? And she did. Wow. But my thing, like, are your containers see-through? Like, you can see that it's, you know, flour.

Flour. Yeah, you can. But, I mean, who doesn't love a custom label? You raise a good point. Yeah, I mean, I think everyone can agree with that. I don't think they can. Sarah-Jane, thanks for your call. Shana?

You know those, when you go to a meeting and you don't know anyone, it says, hello, my name is, hello, my name is baking powder. That'd be nice. That'd be nice. That'd be nice. Shana, you're a big organiser. Well, I used to have a bit of an OCD problem, so I used to use the same coloured pegs when I'd hang out the washing.

Oh, okay, I've found it. I've found what I do. You do this too. Same colour and type, in case you've got mixed type of pegs. Yeah, and then my towels, I've got two different colours and I inter-stack them so that it's not the same colour on top of the same colour. Right. I too, I have to have all the same colour towels

because I don't like them being all mismatched and stuff in the cupboard. Okay. Wow. But yeah, I hear you with the pegs. I'm very particular about how they're pegged. So you won't put like a T-shirt up on the line and it'll have a yellow peg and a green peg? Oh, no, no, no, no.

I used to be like that. I'm not anymore. I used to be like that. Shana, thanks for your call. Jess, what do you organise in your life? I organise my cups in my crockery cupboard. So like all the mugs have to sit and all the handles have to go the same way

so that you maximise on the space in the cupboard. Yeah. Actually, I do that. I do that. Yeah. I am down with that. And if you've got any glasses of pictures on them, the pictures have to face a certain way,

but I think that's just me because I have a young child, so. Right. Brilliant. Jess, thanks for your call. Angela, you actually own a company that specialises in organisation. Yes, we do. Sort My House.

We help people, Auckland, Tauranga and Hamilton. We're really busy because it's something that people need and want in their lives. So you go into someone's house and organise their pantry. Is that the kind of thing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. With lots of labels, beautiful decals. We have our own that we bring along with us. This is a great idea, though,

because I like it, but I just when am I going to... Can't be bothered. Or you're time poor. People don't have the time to do it, but it helps them in their lives, you know? Okay, so there's pantries. What else do people want organised? What's your big kind of business? Everything. So we do

mostly pantries and kitchens. Linning cupboards are really popular. Kids' bedrooms because helping the kids put their toys away properly. Garages are a big one because nobody can be really asked doing a garage. And then offices as well, home offices, bathroom cupboards. I mean, I think we've probably done just about every area of the house. That's so weird. I would never have even thought of that as a business idea,

but you obviously did and people need it. Yeah, yeah, and love it. And have us back over and over again to those kind of, we always normally start with a pantry. And then they're like, this is amazing. What else can you do? And then we're there for a month. This organisation thing,

it's brilliant. Cleanliness, you say. It'll never catch on. Angela, thanks, you call some text messages. I can't get to Angela's website on our work computer, it's considered pornographic.

But that's probably because it's organisational porn. Oh yeah, right, okay. And there's like heaps of people that are doing that. She's not a one-off. Yeah. Somebody said my wardrobe. It's got to be the wardrobe.

Coathangers. All got to be matching coat hangers. Everything's got to be facing the same way. Colours with colours. And it goes through the colour scale on my wardrobe. Wow. I actually did that as well. I got all matching coat hangers because I had some blue ones,

some white ones, some wire ones, some wood ones. I'm like, no, all black. That's fine until you get to it where you're having a night out and then I rip everything out of my wardrobe,

try everything on and then I'm like, I don't like anything and then I leave it on my bed and get shoved back in the wardrobe. What arm you want to try a floor trove? Just keep it on the floor beside your bed

until your wife tells you to tidy it up. What kind of coat hangers did you go for when you did? Just cheap black ones. Black plastic ones? Yeah. I just expected more from you. I got a wooden one. I was expecting like a wooden one

with a steel. I have nice wooden ones at least. No, I got a couple of those for like big jackets and they came out of the end. What came out of the end? The wire thing that held the wood onto the hook. The hooks came out. They screw in. Why don't you just screw it back in?

No, they were real budge-o. They were warehouse-like. Oh, okay. Well, that's on you. Cheap ones, yeah. Probably should have got to spend a bit more money on them. That's on you. Somebody said,

when I take people around to my mum's house, I take them and show them her bathroom because the organisation of the cupboard underneath the sink is just something to behold. And everybody's always impressed. What do they do different? I've got absolutely no idea. I haven't seen a photo. So they have containers for like toothpaste and stuff.

I'd love to see it. I'd love to see it. Somebody said pantry. The pantry. But they're going against the norm here. It's more of a colour coordination in the pantry for these people. All see-through containers

and all the same stuff that's the same colour. People need to Google Khloe Kardashian's pantry because you're not going to beat that pantry. It's a pretty good pantry. Good pantry. Am I a bad person?

Alright, it's time to judge. Or help. Or help, sure. This person is asking for help. Are they a bad person? Should they do something? And as always, if you find yourself in a predicament, we love these juicy stories,

you can message us on our Facebook page, FBMZM. I like that there's a few of these coming through to my email because I'm obviously the most approachable out of the three of us. Megan at ZMOnline.com, sure. You can hit me with those emails. That's fine. So this will remain anonymous. I just think it's because Vaughn's hard to spell.

Or they keep getting bounced back. Yeah. So I recently split from my long-term partner of six years. A total shock and blow from my perspective. Things seemed to be going great, and he'd been talking seriously about marriage and kids when I got home one day to him walking out on me. It's been an incredibly challenging time in my life,

but I think I've done well letting myself feel what I need to feel and processing it. I know I've still got a long road ahead to heal, but at least I've started. Okay, so they were together six years. He walked out on her. So I had some drinks with a good friend on the weekend and we downloaded Tinder to have a laugh.

While we were figuring out how to use it, one of the first people I matched with was one of his mates. Not his best mate, but definitely long-term mate who would come around for dinner sometimes kind of mate. Right. So she knows the mate well. Okay. Good mate.

He's not someone I would usually go for at all, but we've been chatting for a couple of days now and it's taken an unexpected turn in the way of sexting and talking about meeting up for, you know, good times.

Yeah. I've never slept with... Sexting? Crazy. What are you... You're like, it took an unexpected turn. I wasn't expecting that to be the unexpected turn.

I thought it was going to be like chatting, coffee, straight to the sex thing. Well, that's why it's an unexpected turn. I've never slept with anyone I wasn't in a committed relationship with, but I am... DTF is some fun with this guy. Oh, wow, okay. So, am I...

She says, am I a bad person? If my ex found out that it wouldn't affect me in any ways, we don't really have any mutual friends left, but I do feel guilty about it. Is she a bad person? No, she's not a bad person. It's his friend. I mean, I don't know if she'd probably have gone down this road if it wasn't his friend.

Yeah, don't know if this is happening for the right reason. But then good things can come from questionable starts. have gone down this road if it wasn't his friend. Yeah, don't know if this is happening for the right reasons. Nah. But then good things can come from questionable starts. But they've been chatting. Is that a thing? I don't know. They've been chatting. Just started talking.

She obviously likes him in some respect. Yeah, right. Just it's not someone she would usually go for. I'm going to say not a bad person. I'm going to say not a bad person. Like Heda, the ex-boyfriend

walked out on her. He doesn't want anything to do with her so she can do what she wants. It's her life. You can't bagsy people. No,

you can't bagsy people. You can't put a bagsy on someone. You can bagsy a seat. Yep. Not a car park if you don't have a car. No.

Like, I won't accept if you're just standing there saying someone's coming in a car. Get out. If it was like a nice amicable breakup

then I would say probably don't do that because like... Yeah car. Get out. If it was like a nice amicable breakup then I would say probably don't do that because like Yeah, okay, fair. But it sounds like he just walked out on her and left her so she's got no

allegiance to him anymore. Yeah. And he doesn't have a right to say what he can do and she can do. Yeah, exactly. But there's plenty more fish in the sea.

Yeah, true. But there's also plenty more trash in the sea. That's actually a problem. And there's plenty of fish with the sea. Yeah, true. But there's also plenty more trash in the sea. That's actually a problem. And there's plenty of fish with plastic in them as well. Yeah, fish and trash. Trashy fish. Okay, so we want to take your calls now and your texts.

What do you think about the situation? Is she a bad person for wanting to hook up with her ex's friend? Yeah. 0800-DARLS-AT-HEM, 9696. And maybe you've been in this situation where you've broken up with someone and maybe your ex has gone there with a friend of yours. Yeah.

How did that... Make you feel. Yeah, and maybe did that break some friendships or not? Give us a call, 0800 dials at M9696. Am I a bad person? Well, Megan, the email, just quickly to recap for those that have just joined us, we're working out if someone's a bad person? Well Megan, the email just quickly to recap for those that have just joined us. We're working out if someone's a bad person or not. So a recent split from a partner of six years.

He broke up with her. It was a shock. They were talking about marriage and kids. So she's gotten on Tinder and she has found, she's matched with and spoken with one of his good friends. And it looks like it's all on for drinks and fun times. She's down for fun times, but she's feeling a little bit guilty. Is she a bad person? So what do you think?

We'll take some calls. Maggie, is she a bad person? I think she needs to decide whether she's a bad person by sort of flipping the table. So if she'd left him for whatever reason and then he started seeing one of her really good friends, not her best friend, but a really good friend, how would she view that? Like, would she think he was a bad person?

Because I think she probably would. Yeah. Yeah, she probably would, but... I know, it's so hard when it's, yeah. But I think, yeah, I think my ex was a bad person. Even if it was me that walked out on him, you know, for whatever reason, falling out of love, growing apart, I would still think that's a bad thing to do. I know, but does she have to care?

No, definitely not. But no, you raise a very good point. You do. Would she care if the boot was on the other foot? And she probably would. That's what I think. There are a lot of people in the world, you don't have to just go there with, you know, your ex's friends. Find someone else.

That's right. Just swipe. You know, keep swiping. Find someone else. Okay. Or just, you know, do whatever makes you happy. Yeah, but you do raise a good point, though, that we're probably not thinking about.

If it was switched around, how would you feel? Maggie, thanks for your call. Thank you. Mia, is she a bad person? No, I don't think she she a bad person? No, I don't think she's a bad person at all. I've been in the same situation where my ex has walked out on me and I ended up going for one of his work friends that he didn't end up working with anymore. Okay. And it actually ended up working out quite nicely. Okay. It

doesn't have to be a spiteful thing at all. So was your ex okay with that when they found out? No, not really. But he was out doing things with people that I knew and blasting it all over social media. So you just said okay. Yeah, fair. Yeah, exactly. Oh, thanks for calling me out.

Kelly, is she a bad person? No way. My friend did this and she broke up with her partner and they had two kids together. And then after a night out, she brought his mate home. And they've been together ever since. It's been almost eight years. They've got their little girl who's one next week, you know. And he's moved on to, he's married now with someone else

and they've got a baby on the way as well and it's all amicable now. But yeah, go for it. It doesn't, yeah, it doesn't need to matter. Because she shouldn't write off, she shouldn't write off someone. That might be her, like, person. Yeah.

But she's going to write them off just because you, just because you met them through someone else. Yeah, all right. Kelly, like, person. Yeah. But she's going to write them off just because you met them through someone else. Yeah. All right, Kelly, thanks. You call. Some text messages. And just quickly, the poll result from Instagram, we asked, is she a bad person? 22% said yeah.

78, no way. So I think the nation overwhelmingly agrees she's not a bad person. Go for it, girl. And that she should go for this. Don't feel bad at all. No, that's the general consensus on the text as well. She's not a bad person. Go for it, girl. And that she should go for this. Don't feel bad at all. Nah, that's the general consensus on the text as well. She's not a bad person. He walked out on you

so that made, he made the first move and you just checkmated him. Yeah. To be fair though. I love it when Chess gets sexy. Yeah. Like Maggie said though, like if that happened to me I'd be so pissed. You'd be so pissed. But, like.

And it would also maybe feel quite nice just to hook up with one of his friends. To put the boot in. Just to rub it in a little bit. And, like, somebody said it's way more on the guy that's still friends with him. Yeah, that's true. Than her. Because he's cut his ties with her. Yeah.

And he's still friends with that guy. So. I would say, overwhelmingly, not a with her. Yeah. They're still friends with that guy. So. I would say overwhelmingly not a bad person. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about slaters. Okay. Hey, you know when you lift up the wood and there's all those little scaly dudes? Yeah.

I feel like it was like a couple of years ago we talked about how you hadn't seen slaters for ages. For ages. Well, because I live in the inner city. Yeah. And I haven't overturned any logs lately. Do you see slaters? Yep. All the time.

I love a bit of wood. They're part of the decomposing part of the food chain. What are they related to? Termites. No, they are I had it here before. Wood loose. Wood louse. Imagine a slater

that was the size of a car. Well, technically a slater the size of a dog would be very similar to an armadillo. Is that today's fact of the day? No, no, no, no. But I read more about it. And the actual scientific name for the Slater is the armadillo.

Dilly-illy. I was saying this last night when I found this, because I just saw this about Slaters. That was fascinating to me. Armadillo day-a-day. Armadillo-de-day. Armadillo... Armadilly-de-day. Armadilly-de-day.

Armadilly-de-day. Day-day-day. Okay. Armadilly-de-day. Because they believed that they were in some way like an armadillo, like an armad...

And like an armadillo, this is today's fact of the day, I didn't know this, but when an armadillo and a slater roll into a protective... Oh, I thought you were going to say roll into a bar. That was a joke.

So an armadillo and a slater roll into a bar. And they're like, just a little drink for him. I don't have just standard sores. I'm an armadillo. I can handle it. The armadillo day, when it rolls into a ball, it sucks onto its own bum. To form a seal. What's that?

To form a seal. Yeah. You start off with these things so, like, educational. This is educational. And then they go down like a really like weird childish well no I just thought this was so weird I just thought it would

have been all in the spine I thought it would have been in the armour like they roll and it just holds it on there but apparently it's the suction that they put onto their own butt

that holds them together like do they have butt cheeks and a ball nah they don't have a butt just one butt it's almost like the mouth and the butt are the same so they just form

a perfect seal like imagine docking at the International Space Station. Yeah, right. And then to release, they just go. Wow, okay. And is that so that they're safe? Yeah, it's a protective thing. It's a protective thing.

They've got other names as well, because I've always just called them slaters. Yeah, right. But they are pill bugs. Wait, do they do that when you pick up a stone or a rock? They run, but if you touch them, they'll be like, oh, where's me bum? Roll it up into a hard ball.

So pill bugs is what they're known as. Okay. And I assumed like most insects, they would have been around the world, but they were none in America. They were introduced from Europe. Huh, okay. So I don't know what like scurried around in a there were none in America. They were introduced from Europe. Huh, okay. So I don't know what like scurried around

in a rotting wood in America, like millipedes and stuff maybe. Okay. So they had other names. Armadilloidae. Pillbugs. Yeah. Rolypolies.

Potato bugs. Oh, yeah. I'm not sure why. I've never seen one eat a potato. Slaters and doodlebugs. Doodlebugs. Okay. So, yeah. That's and doodle bugs. Doodle bugs. Okay. So yeah.

Fascinating. Fascinating. Today's factor. I mean it's school holidays. Why not get out there and find a bit of wood today outside. Roll it over. See a slater. Poke it with your finger. And it'll suck its own bottom. Latch onto its own butt and cause like a seal so it can be rolled and held tight in its little ball.

Okay. So today's fact of the day is to get into its protective ball, a Slater will kiss its own butt. And $10 for the first person that sends in a picture of a Slater doing that. Slater. Vaughn will give you $10. I'm not giving him $10. I told him about it. You're giving them $10.

Ah, Megan. Megan's got a Hyundaiundy in her purse. No, that's for me. My mum gave that to me. Okay, well, you're not getting any money, but send a picture anyway. If you find one. That's today's fact of the day. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan

The podcast ZM Yesterday afternoon 4.15pm Location Work Email inbox From Clint Roberts

To the ZM network That's the group That's everybody who works at ZM Is that group? Yeah Yo Here we go To the ZM Network. That's the group. That's everybody who works at ZM. Is that group? Yeah. Yo. Here we go.

I've brought in some lemons and Mandis from home. They're in a brown paper bag by Mountie. Help yourself. Is there any left? Have we got confirmation if there's any left out there? I'd love some lemons. I'd totally do a Mandy. Hashtag citrus. Hashtag immunity.

Hashtag sustainable dad. Now, a rock, Katie. Hashtag citrus. Hashtag immunity. Hashtag sustainable dad. Now, immediately I felt attacked. I thought I was work dad and provider of all things citrus. Because what have you, you've done Fiji hours? What have you done lately? I had Fiji hours. Grapefruit. You had a lot of grapefruit.

I got lots of grapefruit. And they're coming in hot. Because you know I love my grapefruit. grapefruit. I got lots of grapefruit, and they're coming in hot. Oh, because you know I love my grapefruit. Yeah, I've got lots of grapefruit. They're really sweet. They're really good. Yeah, I can bring in a good grapefruit. Those are well-crafted grapefruit trees.

I've got tangelos. I'm saying that wrong. I know I am, but I don't know how to say it right. Tangelos. Tangelos. Katie? Three lemons. Three lemons.

Oh, that's kind of... Oh, no. Those are good-looking lemons, too. Those are like... Pitch a poof. They could go in a supermarket. I know. They could. They kind of... Oh, no. Those are good-looking lemons, too. Those are like... Pitch a poof. They could go on a supermarket. I know, they could. They're really like a vibrant yellow.

Mine are more of a gnarled lemon, like a big... Yours are a bit manky. They'd be in the uglies pile. Big, juicy uglies. Yeah. Your ones wouldn't go to a supermarket. No. I've got oranges.

I've got citrus, baby. I've got citrus. So I felt this was a real attack. Like someone was coming for the crown and that somebody was Clint from the afternoon show who joins us now. Not a good morning to you. God, I knew I was going to start a war here.

As soon as I sent that email, I knew I was stepping on some toes. Toes have been trod right on. You're about to be a dad too. so you're really coming for Vaughan. I thought dads were meant to support other dads. Come on, build me up, brother. There's a pecking order of dads, though. There's definitely a hierarchy of dads.

I'll take senior dad. You can be a junior dad. It's like if you were the person in the office that always baked the cake for someone's birthday and then someone new joins work and they're great at baking cakes. Yeah. Better than you. But for other people it just seems like this is great. More cake.

For the people providing cake. I mean it becomes a little bit of a power struggle. So I'm just wondering how do we handle this? How do we move forward? Yeah well that would be the case if I thought you were dominating the category. I'll just say I've never received any citrus from you that's because they're so hot when i bring them in in the morning they're gone by lunchtime word gets around i i think you're resting on your laurels i think once upon a time maybe you were supplying and you're like all right

claim that crown now and then you got then you got comfy then you got lazy right now and now i've come in yeah and maybe and maybe that's my tactic. Maybe I'm just here to re-motivate you into providing, but doing a better job as a citrus dad. Because my macadamia nuts are in the drying phase before a honey roasting. But Megan's just talked herself out of any of those with that attitude.

What? I bought you an avocado tree with the intention that I was giving free apples. Well, you would reap the reward of avocados. Maybe in 10 years. Well, you would reap the reward of avocados. Maybe in 10 years when they... Well, it was a long game. Avocados, yeah, they're coming in. They're coming in, the avocados.

But you're right, Clint. I think there's a lot of talk. I mean, we know about all these citrus trees, but we haven't seen that much. Also, you're running a farm. Like, I would expect that you would be bringing in bottled. More approaches. I'm just your friendly local neighbourhood dad-to-be. I'm running three trees

and I'm sharing the love. If anything, I'm one bump of crops from you. You should be running a farmer's market at ZDM every Friday morning. You could have a little stall. I'm not paying, though. What? I'm not paying. We'll go back to the barter system. You can offer some services in exchange for goods.

What can I offer? I live in the city. I don't have any fruit trees. Exactly. Question yourself. What can you offer? This is a moment of reckoning for you. An absolute moment of reckoning.

Well, these are good-looking lemons, actually. I'm going to have to... Up your game. Fertilise my lemon tree to get a higher yield. Maybe you can get some tips from Clint. Do you struggle with birds? You had a possum in your bloody kneecap palm too. Did you kill that?

That was a horrible thing. It scarpered. I don't know what happened to it. It left. I didn't have to kill it. He killed it. He just didn't want to own up to killing it. Can I also say those lemons,

Lucy, the mother-to-be, has turned those into a beautiful lemon cake as well. I bet she has. I'm thinking about bringing some of that into work as well. I shan't be threatened by cake. It's fine, I can enjoy cake. Clint's my favourite work dad already. You're about to get some time out.

That's what you're going to get. I don't know if you can do that. Oh, I will time you all out. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. The Advertising Standards Authority in the UK has deemed a celebrity on Instagram to be anyone over, that has over 30,000 followers. So they would be coming up with this guideline

because then you're an advertiser and you have to reach certain standards, don't you? Exactly. Because you've got an audience. This has come about after a person who has 32,000 followers, Sarah Wilcox-Knot. She's at This Mama Life. So she endorsed a sleeping sedative on Instagram.

Wow, okay. So it was a drug. And they have said, well, she's a celebrity. She's got 32,000 followers. So celebrities and health professionals are not allowed to endorse medical products. So if you've got 29,000 followers, go nuts. I don't think anyone should be endorsing drugs. You know, like you don't know enough.

But what about even celebrities peddling weight loss products? You mean Slim T's? Like Slim T's and all kinds of stuff that maybe have some... Well, that's what a lot of... The other side of the thing, that's what a lot of people are campaigning against because technically it has effects on your body. Even if they claim that it's natural,

I don't know either way. Are celebrities still allowed to peddle cigarettes? No, they're not. Even Netflix has said that they're going to cut down. Pull back on cigarettes. They're going to do a warning, right? Yeah, they've had so many shows where everyone's smoking ciggies. Everyone's like, hang on a second.

Yeah, don't make this call. But I don't know what the deal is in New Zealand with medical products. Like if you went on Instagram and... Surely you're not allowed to endorse. I wouldn't think so. Something like that. But yeah, everyone's like, wow, blow me down. Anyone with over 30,000 followers is now a celebrity.

So that's the bar. If you want to get a free Bali holiday, you need at least 30,000. You can buy them. Bali holidays. Followers. Followers. Well actually I don't know what will cost more. Buying followers

or going to Bali? Buy, followers. Well, actually, I don't know what will cost more. Buying followers or going to Bali? Buy Instagram followers. Okay, let me see. I think $1,000 will get you quite a few, wouldn't it? Okay, here's the first. Are they getting a bit smarter with their bots now? The bots like and everything. The fake ones?

Yeah. Oh, right, okay. Well, I'm just going to click on the first one that's come up here and see how much this costs. We'll wait. No, the work Wi-Fi is not good. Okay, so 5,000 followers, $39.95.

Are you kidding me? $40 for 5,000. Is that American? Yeah, American dollars. And how many do you need? $30,000. So times that by six. Yeah. That's not... Cheaper than barley, mate. That's way cheaper than I thought it would be. That's insane.

But then how are you getting a free... How many to get a free Bali holiday, though? I don't know. I feel like everyone's got, like, lots of followers now. You just get everyone at school to follow you. You know what I mean? Yeah. Maybe if you go to bloody Ring of Toto,

if everyone follows you at school, you might have a few followers. If I went to school and everyone had followed me, I would have had 400 followers. Oh, please. All right. And we would have set up an assembly. All right.

It's at 3.98. Which two of you bars is not following me? Who's not following me? I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but like, why are you guys following me? ZM. Hit music.

Live ZM. Flesh, Fawn and Megan. The podcast.