ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - July 19 2019

Episode Date: July 18, 2019

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Wait, that doesn't make sense What? What did you say? New Zealand's gone down 50-49 Outscoring Australia in the last two quarters After trailing by eight during the third quarter Oh, okay, so we could have scored seven more points in the second half Right, okay Sorry, Anna Sorry have scored seven more points in the second half. Right, okay.

Sorry, Anna. Sorry, Anna. Anya. Thank you. Thank you. Now, wasn't it close? Didn't we miss a goal right on the buzzer? I don't know.

It doesn't say in my story. If it doesn't say in your bulletin, are you not allowed to know about it? No. I think Maria Folau missed the final goal there. Did God not... Apparently not....control it missed the final goal there. Did God not apparently not control it in

into the hole? No. Unbelievable. God doesn't tend to control it into the hole. He doesn't like it. Well he should. Nobody can.

Can he? Well they're married but only for the purposes of making babies. Was talking about the netball hole whoop. Right. Is that what you call it? You know me too. Babies is what you call winning aball hole whoop. Right. Is that what you call it?

Yeah, no, me too. Babies is what you call winning a game of netball. Yeah, right, right. Victory in netball is called babies. For making victories. But it does seem odd that he wouldn't have done that for her. After all they've been through. It was a test.

Oh, was it? It was a test. Well, it was a netball test and we've lost it. Yeah. Thanks, God. But this isn't even... God, the cricket and now the netball. Thanks, God.

Why don't you want New Zealand sport to win? But this wasn't... We're not out. Oh, we're not? We go through. Okay, that's good. We'll either play South Africa or England. Oh, God.

Well, England, that went well for us at the start of the week, didn't it? Yeah. But we bet... The Black Ferns bet England at the Super Series. They did. Yeah, they did. So maybe our female athletes might have more luck against England than our male athletes, perhaps.

Good. And first All Blacks. That's been a very sporty weekend, Dave. It is in the first All Blacks test this weekend, Argentina. Yeah. In Argentina. Just when you say Argentina, I immediately start smelling like meats. Right, okay.

South Americans know their barbecue. Yeah, they certainly do. Sort of a flame situation. Oh, an asado cross. Yes. That's the way they cook it there. They make a fire and they have sort of the whole carcass of the animal spread on a cross that leans next to the fire

and you lather, you mop it. Right. It certainly sounds like we won't have a what would you say in Spanish what do you say hola

no that's delicio or something I'm not sure do they speak Spanish in Argentina or is that Portuguese delicioso

delicioso I thought that was Italian but there's quite a few similarities between that you'll notice exquisito you'll notice where Exquisito. You'll notice where sounds Megan so far on the show this week. I never noticed.

Where is she? She had an operation for her carpool tunnel syndrome. Carpool karaoke. With James Corden. James Corden's been giving everybody this syndrome in their wrists. Yeah. Horrible, man. So she had an operation yesterday, so she's resting up today.

Good. Could have come in. I mean, she doesn't have to use her hand, does she? I'm just saying. I could have picked her up. You could have picked her up. She doesn't need a drive, but you know that's all right. No, that's not.

Not all of us have a fantastic work ethic. She's um... Obviously, I'm joking. She's been wearing a brace for months. Oh, she has. So she's finally got the operation. Yeah. So resting up.

But then she has to go and get the other one done at some stage. They wouldn't do two at once. Because then how are you going to wipe and clean? Well, yeah, I think Mr. Toyboy rung them on the slide. He was like, don't do two at once. I'm not wiping that mess. Top six is coming up. And Instagram, you may have noticed yesterday.

And it's weird. Have you noticed in the feed? Have you noticed the likes count's gone? Only because I've been told. Yeah. To be honest, I haven't been on the gram too much in the last day to kind of like see how it has changed. Yeah.

But I couldn't care less. Yeah,'t care less. I haven't talked to anybody well people may have lied to me when I asked like just then you didn't your heart wasn't really in the neither. No. Was it? No it wasn't really in it. Nah because I said I couldn't care less and you're like oh neither. The only thing is sometimes you need to scroll in through a post. You and some grammars are going to get together and be like crying or something into your sponsored drinks. I couldn't care personally

but it's like when you like someone's photo do you like take into account how many other people have liked it? No. And when they said that like this is one of the reasons

we're getting rid of it I was like that wouldn't if I like something I would like it. I would never oh no no heavens they've already got enough.

I shan't enjoy them. Well the top six coming up. The top six other ways to let people know you really like them. All right. Trust me, I'm a regular liker of people. That wasn't believable. Sorry. All right, you lot, listen up.

It's story time. Story time, three news headlines. Anne Vaughan and normally Megan would pick one headline only, but producer Caitlin's in Megan's seat. Moved in there quickly. Still warm. Still warm and you're just right in there. It's one day, guys.

That's what they all say. That's what they all say. During a coup, that's what Frank Banamanarama said in Fiji once. Oh, we'll just do this for one day. So you're still running the show in Fiji? I'm not completely out today with my Fijian politics, but I believe so. They wanted to get rid of him, but he's still there like 10 years later. Is Frank...

Are we cool with a coup? Be... As long as we can get to Denarau, get to Beachcomber. Yeah, if you can just pass through Denarau. We'll stop at the Radisson Blue. Yeah. As long as there's not any, like, civil unrest. As I'm enjoying a Mai Tai at five o'clock in the afternoon besides the pool.

We should be fine. We'll be fine. Great. All right. Three news headlines. Pick one of the following. Headline one, man finds Roomba and dogs don't mix. Yeah, well, I know this one.

Okay. Yep. Yep. It's a classic involving the Roomba. Headline two, Spider-Man dances with the devil. And headline three, new way to tackle homelessness. Those are your headlines? Well, the Roomba situation, the guys, he went out,

and his Roomba went out into his house to do its daily chores, and the dog had taken a turd and it ran over it and literally just spread dog shit throughout his whole house. Correct. Yeah, that's that story. I want, I like the third one

to combat homelessness. Because Spider-Man danced with the devil. Yep. Or a new way to tackle homelessness. New way to tackle homelessness. As long as it's not actually like physically tackling homelessness. No, no,'s not actually like physically tackling homelessness. No, no, certainly not, Vaughn.

Okay, good. Maybe it's something that we can put on help here as well. Well, we go to West Palm Beach in Florida where officials there are hoping that a continuous loop of children's songs played throughout the night will keep homeless people from sleeping in a city park now they are wanting to loop baby shark and raining tacos um in the hope of getting uh the homeless people or discouraging camping have you got have you heard running tacos i have i know

baby shark but not rainy tacos is this going to be the next Baby Shark? Is that the theory here? Or do you not know it? No. No, raining tacos. You should be all over raining tacos. Okay, hold on. Apparently it's one of the big ones. It's going to have an ad for it.

Because the big ones always go, psh, psh. Don't give them any free advertising. You've got to pay around here, mate. You don't get free advertising. There we go. My niece would listen to Baby Shark. It's raining tacos.

From out of the sky. Tacos. No need to ask why. Just open your mouth and close your eyes. It's raining tacos. It's raining tacos out in the street. Tacos. All you can eat, lettuce and shells.

Who's paying for all these tacos? It's raining tacos. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yummily yum. Okay, I actually love this. This might be 2019's best song. This is amazing. Yum, yummily yum. Bring your sour cream.

Is it too close to It's Raining Men? Like, have they got an issue with this? Nah. Oh, they've built a robot to catch all the tacos. Would this discourage you from sleeping in a park or make you want to party? It's raining tacos. Raining tacos. Raining tacos.

Raining tacos. This is brilliant. It's raining tacos. It's raining tacos. Wow. Raining tacos. This has had 31 and a half million views on YouTube. I'm not surprised.

But then it's just nothing these days. That's a drop in the pan. Pot, bucket, sea, whatever. So it's done by someone called Parry Grip, an American singer-songwriter who is the lead vocalist and guitarist for the pop punk band Nerf Herder and wrote it in, what, 2017?

Right. I've heard of Nerf Herder. I had not heard of... Yeah, right. There's another one called Pancake Robot. He's written that as well. Is it as catchy though? The Pancake Robot is coming to town.

He's mixing up the batter and he's laying it down. Oh my God, I love these songs. I know, not even five. All you can eat, yum yum. All you can eat, my God. I love these songs. I know, not even five. I mean, what he's really done is identified food that people love. Pancakes. Tacos. Yep. Catchy beats.

Yep. Chuck a robot in there. Bit of vocoder. Yep. That's got to be the... Hold on, I want to play the hook for you. That is good stuff. Oh my gosh.

Wow. Okay, well I think we're all subscribed. You'll get all the latest hits. My kids click on subscribe for everything that they watch and so all of my like suggest that if I ever open YouTube in front of people

my immediate is the kids love this because it's all just like junk are they gonna like how are they gonna like those two songs I mean

this is right in August's wheelhouse cause she loves those are all very danceable and she loves food and robots I don't know Indie will like it but she might do that thing The She Loves Food. Those are all very danceable. And She Loves Food. Yeah. And robots. Yeah. I don't know.

Indie will like it, but she might do that thing that seven-year-olds do where they think they're a bit cool for that. Right. Oh, yeah. I would have liked that one. But then I'll find her in the room listening to it. Be like, King, king, robots coming to town.

Fleshforn and Megan. The podcast. ZM. You may remember a few years ago, the boy with tape on his face was on America's Got Talent, but previous to that had been doing the New Zealand comedy circuit for a long time. Yeah, it kind of took him going to America and winning that

and getting fame for everyone to go, oh, you're that guy. Oh, yeah, New Zealand. He's New Zealand, yeah. Sam is his name. Sam Wells, he's in New Zealand. He's been doing the act for ages. Really caught America's attention.

Got a residency in Vegas out of it. That's big too. Yeah, that's pretty massive. A lot of money, wouldn't it? And they have like magic and comedy and everything's and they've got to be pretty top-notch or performers to get a residency in Vegas is a big deal. Well, I've read that some fans are claiming, what's the word?

Fraud. Yes. That's it. Because they bought tickets to his Las Vegas residency. Yeah. But he's not going to be there. It turns out he's been training somebody to do the performance while he's not there. Like an understudy, if you will, because the dates that these people have bought tickets for,

he's got a gig in London. So his understudy will be performing the gig. So what's his show? He puts tape on his face, like a cross of black tape. Yes. And what does he do? Just mime stuff. There's magic. cross of black tape. Yes. And what does he do? Just mime stuff. Because I've never really...

There's magic, there's... Right. But he gets... It's really heavy on audience interaction. Right. Like, he gets the people out of the crowd, works stuff out, there's a bit of magic,

there's illusions and stuff. But it's just generally all entertainment, but he never talks. Yeah, talking. So, technically, anybody could do that, right? Whereas, say, for example, if there's Britney Spears or J-Lo or, you know, Celine Dion who do these Vegas residencies, you're going to see them.

Well, that's the thing. He says it's a show, so it's likened to an understudy. Or if you were going to see a musical or a Cirque du Soleil. Anyone can do that. Well, not anyone. But, you know, if they're trained. I'd like to see you do Cirque du Soleil. I'd just that. Well, not anyone. But if they're trained. I'd like to see you do Cirque du Soleil. I'd just be that clown funny guy that runs around.

I'd be there just telling people where their seats were. But I understand that because people know his face. Like he's not going to get people that look exactly like him if they have the same talent. That's what I want to know. How similar does the understudy look? Because he's also had the look of the dark makeup around the eyes and the heavily like product hair.

It's always like a blazer with a striped shirt underneath. That's been the look forever. Right. With boy with tape on his face. But you're all for this idea. I don't know why we haven't done it. What, just get someone to be Fletcher Ford and Megan and then what, just go on holiday or do a London show?

Yeah. Like he is. Well, we go on holiday and they just stay here and do this. Right. Okay. But it wouldn't be the same. Well, no, because that would, obviously we have to get the best people. Right.

That would study and know what we would say. Right. What if they were like better than you? We'd have to fire them. Well, I'd kill them and find the next one. I'd make them very disposable. So find average, but not... So we franchise it.

I'd imagine Jim's mowing. Yep. But Fletch, Fawn and Megan. You got it. Okay. I like where this is going. You got it. We take a heavy franchise percentage.

Well, we have to advertise it, don't we? We have to advertise this, shall we? Heavy. As one of your producers normally, when Megan's here, that just sounds like a lot of extra work for me. As long as it doesn't sound like extra work for me. Oh, I see.

And if there is extra work for Vaughn, see Vaughn 2. Vaughn 2. OG Vaughn 2. But do you still get paid? Heavily, yeah. Oh, I see. He'sughn 2 is getting hardly anything. He's just lucky to have a job. Yeah.

Yeah, lucky to have a job. It's work experience. It's invaluable work experience. It's going to look great on your CV. Yeah. Yeah, learn the intricate human workings of a person. Will it be a living wage? Because we don't want Vaughn 2 to strike.

Oh, no, there'll be no unions. Absolutely. If there's any sniff of a Fletch Vaughan and Megan union, it will be crushed. Right. They'll be pulled apart. Absolutely not. They will be living,

let's say, but it depends on where they're living. Okay. I just think that's a good idea. Yeah. Because now he's trained somebody else to do it

and he can go overseas. It's clever. It's franchising. It is. It's very clever. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. We'd hear about this a lot and it was every time horrible.

And it was people of all ages because it was a real, it had mum mistake written all over it, didn't it? But it wasn't. You get young people buying tickets to shows off via GoGo and then turning up and they don't actually work. Well, yeah, Caitlin, friend of ours, James,

did that for Pink. And I was like, you both rolled our eyes. And it was like, oh, this will be the last concert where this happens because this, I don't know.

Well, even the Bruno Mars one when all those people got turned away and it was on the news everywhere. I was like, well, surely that's enough to stop people using it. I think people are just so desperate to get hold of tickets that they're like.

But then just wait for Trade Me or, I don't know, Ticketmaster Resale. Yeah. I'm just Googling because, yeah, okay, it looks to have been enacted and happening. Okay. Because if you ever searched concert tickets and put any artist in, any artist that was coming, so say you were like, I should have bought tickets.

I'm going to see if I can find some. The top was often a paid result for Viagogo. On Google, yeah, it was all the time. And that often led people to think that was the official place to get tickets. 100% because it was the top result. But underneath a sponsored or paid post where people have, and people will buy,

like, Via GoGo would pay to have Elton John tickets, their top result. Yeah. So they pay for that specifically. They pay per click. But then you're clicking through, you're buying the ticket,

they get their money back and some more and then those tickets don't work and then they could wipe their hands of it. Now, I mean, we should say that sometimes they did work. Yeah. And that was the problem because people would have friends that were like, yeah, my tickets worked.

But then there were no checks and balances were there. So people were uploading these fake tickets. 100%. And that's what they said. They said, if you're profiting off this, the main problem with VeerGogo was if you're profiting from this, you've got to be running some sort of quality control on it. And well, now Google has blocked via GoGo from paid for search results. That's a big move from them because that's

a lot of money for them. For Google to say goodbye to. And it's really not their fault, is it? It's not, but it's also good that they're doing their part to try to stop it from happening. I mean, they're still listening to us. They'll still hear us. It's not like anyone's going,

I want to buy Elton John tickets and then going straight to Virgo Go. So they're only going there because Google have put them at the top. It would be really interesting to see how much traffic went to Virgo Go through Google because it was always the top result whenever you searched anything

that was selling tickets to anything. It wasn't just concerts. It was sports events. Yeah. Could have been like talks, comedy shows, anything. Yeah. Anything that involved tickets. They basically paid to be at the top, but then had no follow through.

Well, my friend that we mentioned, our friend James, he actually got a voucher to reuse. At Bear Gogo. For some tickets. Yeah. And then he like, oh. Yeah, Iogo. For some tickets. Yeah. And then you're like, well,

yeah, I know. Same position. But then did use it and I think got some tickets to something overseas and they were fine. Oh, okay.

So, yeah, so, I mean, what do you do? Well, Google have made the first move. They'll no longer be the first results

that pop up right at the top. Right. Which for people who have turned up to a concert and then just have to stand outside, that's probably quite good. Yeah, it is. Quite good.

From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six. Hello there. Today's Top Six deals with the fact that Instagram has taken away the like count on your Instagram posts. So they put up a post yesterday saying, hello people,

we're currently running a test that hides the total number of likes and video views for some people in the following countries. Australia, Brazil, come to Brazil. Come to Brazil where we don't count the likes. Canada, Ireland, Italy, Japan and New Zealand.

Yeah, that's us. Now we ask for your thoughts. How do you feel about this? Are you keen on the idea that likes will be hidden? Or, no thanks, not keen on this idea. 74% of you said. You're keen. Yes, keen on this. Because it takes off the pressure, doesn't it?

Of your friends seeing how many pictures or likes you got on your photos. What's that? You were talking about that before, but if a photo doesn't have lots of likes, I feel sorry for it. You'll like it. You'll like it. Not for the person, I'm just like, that photo should have more likes. Yeah, but then

if someone has too many likes, you're like, I'm not liking it. Yeah, they've got enough likes. So you won't give them anymore. If it's a celebrity, you won't give them any more. But then if it's like your friend, of course you like all their photos. I don't like celebrities' photos anymore

because Megan called me out on it. She's like, oh, nobody likes celebrities' photos. Yeah, but you were liking hot girls' celebrity photos. No, no. No, I'm not that foolish. It was a Selena Gomez post,

but it wasn't like a hot, sexy Selena Gomez post. I thought it was like a good Selena Gomez post. I think if you're commenting on them, then that's like, if you're commenting on Selena Gomez's post. Oh my God, Selena, you look so great. I hope everything's well. But yeah, occasionally you'll see one of your friends comment on a celebrity post and you'll be like,

that's weird. What do you want out of this, buddy? Like they don't want to reply to you. What are you doing? Like people on Beyonce's post who put, like, Yas, queen, like, fire, like, Yas, queen. And you're like, Beyonce will be like, I might actually reply to that person and become friends with them.

Tina and Omru said, yes, fire, Jay-Z. Isn't that nice? Great news. It's nice, though. Like, they're just sharing some nice thoughts. Yeah, yeah, putting it out there. Well, without seeing the numbers, people might be wondering how they can let people know

that they still like them. So today's top six is the top six other ways to let people know you still like them. Okay. Number six, give them a hearty yet not dominating handshake. Like it's a handshake. It's firm, but don't do that thing that people do where they dig the thumb in and twist so their hand's on top.

And if someone tries to pull that shit, you don't let them twist your hand. You keep it perfectly. Or like Donald Trump, you pull their arm. Pull them, no. Stand your ground. So that means you like them. I thought that was just like a professional thing.

Yeah, but it shows that you respect them. Oh, okay. Because the idea of the handshake was that you'd shake with your right hand so you couldn't pull your sword out and like attack them. Because there wasn't too many left-handed swordsmen. The dominant hand, of course, was right. So you'd be giving them your fighting hand. So that just shows. And that's also your liking hand. So you're not liking anybody else's photos while you're shaking your hand. Number five on the list of the top six other ways to let people know you still like them.

Bake them a treat of their choosing. That's pretty cool. Like listen for clues of what they like. Or maybe you've been to a cafe with them and they're like, oh, that's my favorite. What would I like? I know you love a ginger slice. I do love a ginger slice. But basically you just love any treat.

Very easy to please. When someone brings you treats, you're like, what have you done? No. Well, you could say, well, I can't see how many likes your last photo got, so I baked you caramel slice. Okay. I hope you got enough likes.

Yeah. There's as many like, there's as many marshmallows in this rocky road as likes I would have given your photo. Number four on the list of the top six other ways

to let people know you still like them. Give them a nickname that identifies a positive personality trait. Like Smiley. I don't know. Smiley's not a great one.

Hey, Smiley. Hey, Smiles. I don't know. Nah, not Smiles. Hey, Betty. I don't know. I'm trying to think of like I'm looking at you and. No, no, no, no, no.

You don't do how they look. No, you've got to look at his personality. It's a personality trait. Hey, sarcasm. No, that's not nice because you're being sarcastic. You can call me hard worker. Hey, diligent hard worker. Hey, champ.

Where was my one? Buddy, why did I put my one on the spot? Number three on the list, the top six other ways to let people know you still like them. Smile at them. It's a delicate balance because you don't want to go too smiley because they'll be like, yes, I like that smile. That's creepy for it. It's a bit creepy.

But, you know, interestingly enough, I read that smiling at strangers, if people say, oh, you've got a nice smile or like, you know, your smile's not creepy. Yeah. Smiling at strangers is one of say, oh, you've got a nice smile, or like you know your smile's not creepy, smiling at strangers is one of the nicest things you can do. Oh, I absolutely thrive off smiling at strangers. And if they don't see me, I'll just keep smiling until they laugh. Walk in front of them, they'll walk in towards you, you're smiling, and you're like, excuse me, hi, I'm smiling at you. But it gives you like the biggest little sore of your heart.

Yeah. A little sore in your heart. You. A little heart sore on your heart. You should try smiling at strangers. It is weird because- Yesterday, I took my niece for a walk, my dog. I call her my niece, my dog niece. And just the amount of, like, I was just so happy after that walk. I got so many smiles.

I think they were smiling at Minnie, but- No, that doesn't mean- I was like, I'm the one who can- If it made you happy, you take the smiles. Yeah. Odd, but- But Fletcher Boyd's eye contact. I don't understand you, man. but no that doesn't mean if it made you happy you take the smiles yeah odd but it's weird but Fletch avoids eye contact

I don't understand people look at you don't live in the city in the city you smile at someone they're like are you about to knife me are you on net or try to sell me a Hare Krishna book

yeah exactly number two on the list of the top six other ways to let people know you still like them because you can't they can't say that you've liked

their Instagram post tell them you admire something about them that's nice fletch i really like how you wear that jumper thanks is it just on i'm just wearing it on surface level compliment yeah yeah thank you yeah okay you've got nice eyebrows thank't. We're trying to go below the surface. And number one on the list of the top six ways to let people know you still like them because they can't see how many Instagram likes they get anymore. With their permission, a friendly embrace.

With their permission? With their permission. So like... Do we hug now? Oh, okay. So you have to ask. I went in quite hot at my school reunion last weekend with hugs for everybody in like small town New Zealand. I don't know if they're like all into the hugs. Oh, okay. So you have to ask. I went in quite hot at my school reunion last weekend with hugs for everybody in like small town New Zealand. I don't know if they're like all into the hugs.

Oh, no. And like I was French, not French kissing because that's with tongue, but you know how the Europeans will go, amois, amois, amois. Tried that on a couple of guys. That went really into it. You know. Yeah, you try.

You try. You can't win them all. That is today's Top 6. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan The podcast Imagine last night I'm on I'm on Facebook Well I wasn't even on Facebook actually

And I got a A little ding Okay To say I've got a message What time was it? I'll tell you right now I'll load this up It was

Oh it was only 10 to 7 So it wasn't a late night DM slide Right But it's from Because Caitlin Is Caitlin Jane Marrett? This is Caitlin here. Yeah.

And her mum is Jane Marrett. So often I'll get a message, not often, but every now and then I'll get a message from Caitlin's mum, mostly discussing how Caitlin wants to go vegan and we're both very worried about that. You're so annoying. It's just, It doesn't concern you Well your mother and I are very worried

So last night I get a ding And it pops up Jane And I just think it's a message from Caitlin And I open it up and it's much better Because it's a message from her mum And she said This is a bit of you And it's a photo of a kid in a go-kart

This happened in Australia In rural Australia That's because This happened in Australia, in rural Australia. That's because she's in Australia at the moment. And it's a kid on like a homemade go-kart getting towed by a goat, like chariot styles, getting towed by a goat. And the kid just looks like he's having the time of his life. That's pretty cute. Because you've got goats, so of course she knows that you'll love any goat video.

I'm always inundated with goat content. But mum's just joined the cult. She's joined the line. And I said, this looks like fun. And she said, yes. And I said, I'll harness them up. It's happening, Mama Jane. And she said, I just thought it bloody well might.

She's busy. She's on a holiday with my dad. Doug. Doug at Port Douglas because my family only like to go to holidays. Like we went to Whitsundays for Whitney's 30th. I don't know what it is. You'd have to go to the Catlins.

Why don't you go to the Catlins for my 30th? Lame. And your birthday's, when's your birthday? Next March. Yeah, it'll be real cold and windy in the Catlins for your birthday. What about your brother, Taylor? He'd have options.

Isn't there Taylor's Mistake or something? Yeah, there's Taylor's Mistake, but I'd probably go for like, there'd be like a St. Taylor or an island somewhere called Taylor's, wouldn't there? Anyway. So they always go just to a place that's named after them. So yeah, I've had some goat content from Caitlin's mum.

Oh yeah, there's a tail in Ireland in Maryland in the US. You can go there. Maryland would be cold too. True. Might be alright.

Mum messaged me because I think she feels like she has to ask if it's okay that she's messaging you. She's like, I just sent this to Vaughan.

Permission not required for her. Mum and Jane. And I was like, she has to ask if it's okay that she's messaging you. She's like, I just sent this to Vaughan. Permission not required for her. And I was like, cool, Mum. And he was like, he said, it's happening. It's happening. He's like, okay, cool, Mum. It's happening. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Read a lot out of Britain lately about tackling obesity and sugar intake.

Oh, yeah. There was a story recently that Britain for the first time had confirmed that obesity was causing more cancer than cigarettes in their NHS, their national health system. Put those ugly photos on packets of burger rings and Coke bottles.

Like a fat guy or something. No, you know, like on ciggy packets, it's like, here's a cancerous lung. You're like, bleh. I mean, not that I smoke, but I see smokers and I'm like,

bleh. Imagine going and get a bottle of coke or a packet of chippies and it's like, bleh. Just like in a big... It'd be horrible. Here's a gangrenous foot

because someone got type 2 diabetes and didn't look after themselves. Oh no. It'd be horrible. Well, now the UK government has officially put an age limit on energy drinks.

Wow, okay. Yeah, the likes of Monster, Red Bull, you know, all the big international energy drinks here, it would include V, have a new age limit of 16. You will not be able to buy them if you are under the age of 16.

So that means like showing ID at the server or the dairy for a Red Bull. Yeah, pretty much. If you're looking on that age. Is it because of the amount of caffeine? It's caffeine and sugar. Yeah. And they've been doing, the UK health department's been doing

heaps of like investigating into how educated people are. Because it's like, we know that there's lots of sugar in energy drinks. But some people don't. Yeah. Some people have got no idea. A lot of people don't. And that's what they've actually found out during this surveying. Yeah.

Is that people absolutely have no idea how much sugar's in there. They think it's the same as a cup of coffee where you put one teaspoon of sugar in. But it's not. So what cup of coffee where you put one teaspoon of sugar in. Oh God, no. It's not. So what's an average can of Red Bull? Those little ones are like 255. Here's one can of 258 grams. Yeah. Milliliters. Oh, it's got grams.

Grams and milliliters are the same. No. For water it is. For water it is. Yeah. So that's 26 grams of sugar. So that's five teaspoons of sugar in one Red Bull. Is it four grams for a teaspoon of sugar? Is that what we say? Four or five? Four or five.

Four or five. I've always gone five. If you're looking at sugar, always divide by four or five, and that's how many teaspoons in that. So it's five or six in that. Yeah. Oh, my God, in one can. Yeah.

And people sometimes drink, like, they've got to drink a couple. Yeah, yeah. And they do it, like, every morning. Yeah. And people sometimes drink, like they've got to drink a couple. Yeah, yeah. And they do it like every morning. Yeah. I just have an espresso martini. So same with a can. But like it's coffee. But that would be a replacement for a vodka Red Bull,

which an espresso martini is a grown-up's vodka Red Bull. Yeah, it's basically a coffee shot. But you're saying, if you're a tradie on the way to do pick up the hammer and get into it for the day and you're having a couple of monsters But you're saying if you're a tradie on the way to do Pick Up The Hammer and get into it for the day and you're having a couple of monsters, you're just having espresso martinis so you turn up buzzed and pissed. How much alcohol really is in an espresso martini?

I'd say at 7 o'clock in the morning you'd probably taste it more than at like 9.30 at night when you've already had a couple of rosés. You'd probably notice the alcohol effect hitting an empty stomach. Right. A bit more. 302 calories in an espresso martini.

Caitlin, you might be onto something. 302 calories. Is that good or bad? That's bad. And one espresso martini. Sugar is 23 grams. In an espresso martini. I've just Googled it, one random one, and this is what it's telling me.

Yeah. Where's that coming from? The sugar. What's the sweetness in espresso martinis? Is it the carloa? Yeah. Oh, right. Okay.

Some of them have carloa, right? Yeah. Oh, but they're so yum. They are pretty yum. Imagine how odd having an espresso martini every morning at seven. That would just kickstart your day. Yeah, that's what alcoholics say. You started to sound like an alcoholic.

But it's not. It's really more like a coffee. It's a grown-ups day. Yeah, that's what alcoholics say. You started to sound like an alcoholic. But it's not. It's really more like a coffee. It's a grown-ups coffee. It is. Right. Okay. But yeah,

so they're under 16. Just as bad for you as an energy drink, really. And under 16s aren't allowed to drink espresso and martinis

on the way to school anymore either in the UK. No. That's been stomped. Don't do that. That's been stomped right out. So yeah,

basically the campaign that they've launched says that a 500ml energy drink, which is what some of those bigger cans, 12 teaspoons of sugar and the caffeine equivalent of two shots of espresso. So probably not for 16-year-olds. No. No.

So Britain's made the move. I sure hope this pre-recorded laughing isn't after something inappropriate to laugh at, but I just want to take a moment to say thanks to Spark for sponsoring the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. You can grab Spark's $29 prepaid rollover packs and get stacks of extra value. Back to the podcast. Caitlin, you went for a laser appointment. You're having lasers attached to your arms for the upcoming war against the robots.

And also having hair permanently removed from parts of your body using a laser. Are you getting your armpits done? I'm getting my armpits and my... Nether regions. Nether regions done. Okay, right. Back and front.

Great. We've got to go up there. We've got. Back and front. Great. Well, you've got to go up there. You've got to go up the whole valley. It's not as clear and gorse out of one half of the valley if the other half's going to be overrun with invasive scrub and wildling pine. Now, I know that. The whole half pipe.

Okay. I know that there is. The whole louche track. There are bigger things to life than this, right? Like people are dying and stuff. But this has actually changed my life. Like it's so good because I used to get waxing every month. Yeah.

And man, it's painful. Like you know about waxing because you used to get it. It's admin, isn't it? Well, next week I've got my second laser sesh. Already noticing a massive difference after the first one. So I found out that you're not. But now when I first got it done and the hair fell out, every time I farted, I did think I'd shit myself.

So I just think going forward, everybody should be aware of that. Because the warmth. There's been hair there and then there's not. And then there's the warmth and everything just slides. So it's really worrying. Do you find that too, Caitlin? Oh, well, I've had that for years because waxing. Right, because you get a wax.

But I realise that you're not. Well, you guys told me off because I used to pull them out because it was fun. But it's so good under my arms. Like, I don't even, like, for girls, you guys won't understand this, but you get, like, a shadow. Like, even when you're shaving, you get a shadow. Guys will never quite understand a five o'clock shadow, will they?

Where would they ever have experienced that before in their life? But it would be weird having that under your armpits. But we're not talking about the, this is what happened to me after I got the laser done. So you've been going to off and on? Yes, I have. Fantastic people. Fantastic people in Takapuna. They don't even laugh when they see your bumhole.

It's always nice when they don't. If I was your bumhole, I'd probably have to giggle. That's just who I am. How do you know that they're not? Well, you can't hear anything. Yeah, okay. So there's no audible, at least we can say there's no audible gasp when I see your butthole.

No, no, no. My zebra party and I are too busy chatting about just like everything. I was telling you all about my moon cup. Anyway, so. Oh, no. Don't talk about that. Caitlin, don't talk to strangers about your moon cup. They love it.

So afterwards, because I, you know how sometimes you're like, should I park there? Oh, I'm going to be 15 minutes. I'll park there. So I parked in a place that was actually just for managers

and I shouldn't have parked there. So anyway, I like ran out and there was someone blocking me in and I had another appointment to get to. So I was like,

oh, I know I shouldn't have parked there but I still need to get my car out. So I went in and the lovely ladies were like, okay, what you're going to have to do is go upstairs

and tell them that their customer has parked you in. And I was like, easy. I can do that. But they had this funny look on their faces. So they were like, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, they're really lovely upstairs. And I was like, what's upstairs?

What is upstairs? And they said a massage place. But like a, I don't even, how do you, what's the? A massage parlor. Yes, a parlor, right. So not a massage like, not a relaxing spa massage. No. Like a massage wink parlor. Like a massage wink.

Like a fun massage. Well, I find those other massages fun too. So I think we should just lump all the fun to do with the ones that have a sexual eye time. A sexy times massage. Yeah, I had no idea that these still existed. Or like that they did them in New Zealand. Beautiful, isn't it? Don't I, Evie?

It really is, yeah. It's quite admirable. Why did you think it doesn't happen? What do you think when you drive around and you see like massage, but it's like up some like sketchy stairs? I always go to the ones up the stairs. I go to any massage place. Oh, you want to start treading lightly.

Yeah, treading carefully. Do some Google reviews situations. Well, okay. So you had to go upstairs to a massage parlor to get your car unblocked. Yeah. What happened when you went upstairs? Well, I went up there and I spoke to the lady and she got a fright when she saw me because obviously maybe I'm not like a typical customer.

She was like, oh God, we don't have any guys on today. Hey, don't assume that she's not a lesbian. Yeah, exactly. That's quite the assumption. But they might not have had any bisexuals on. Do you have to be bisexual to do that? I thought all the rules were out the window in these situations. No, I don't think so.

Can you just turn the mics off for one second? I just need to ask a real quick question. No, I'm serious. I think it's for whatever you want to pay for. Okay, okay, okay. To the degree of how it ends. Caitlin just off-air asked us what happens up there. Okay, yeah.

So anyway, so I went up there and I was like, I'm so sorry, but I think someone that works here or is a customer here has parked over my car. And she was like, oh, no, I don't think so. And I was like, oh. And then this man just came out of the room and said, oh, yeah, that's my car. I'll move it for you. Absolutely pleasant. Wait, so he was an employee or he was a customer?

He was a customer. He was a customer. He was a customer. And he's probably paying by the hour. And you were making him move the car. That's like five minutes. But I was profusely apologising because I was like, I'm so sorry. Because I don't know what I just walked into. At what stage did it dawn on you that perhaps this wasn't a massage

to relieve calf muscle tension? Because when I went in there, as soon as she saw me, she started making sure the curtain was closed properly. Me and... But he was just like, these things happen, no worries. I was like, I'm so sorry to waste your time. Waste your time is money in his situation. It really is, yeah.

And I zoomed out of there. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Wow, some podcast. Wow. Some shocking stats out. You might want to think about taking up that afterpay. Oh, but then you can have it now. This is worrying, actually. I think we should all be just having a quiet weekend at home,

trying to live as minimally as possible. But then you get bored and you end up online shopping and ticking something up. Yeah. So our debt statistics have been released, New Zealand, and this is not good news. Our total debt in May. Are you sitting down for this? I am.

I'm part of this. $572 billion. That's the nation's debt. But see, when you say that, that doesn't make my credit card look bad at all. Yeah, but everybody adds together and it becomes this. So someone, because I think with my credit card, no one can

see that. Like no one can see like unless I tell someone. They don't know how badly in debt you are. No one knows that. But then obviously someone is. Your mum? Does she know? No, I took her off my accounts years ago. So this was they started working this out.

This is from the people upstairs here at the Herald, the Business Herald. Three years ago they started working it. It's gone up 16% in those three years, the grand total of debt. Gross debt. If you were to put it on each person's head, each person would owe $115,000.

Oh my God. Is that student loan as well? Do they include that? This is all debt. So there's different sorts of debt here. Consumer debt, which is $16.75 billion. That's credit cards, personal loans, after pay. Yeah, ticking things up.

That's that sort of debt. So $16.75 billion. Housing debt. So that's.75 billion. Housing debt. So that's mortgages and all things to do with housing is up 6%. And that debt is at $265 billion. Oh my God. So that's quick maths. That's just under half of the total.

Owners. Oh, 100%. Owners. Yeah. Local government. So that's like your council and stuff. Yep. Next time that you see a pothole and you're like, why has that not been fixed?

Because they're $17.3 billion in debt. Oh, dear. Business debt, that's borrowing for all things business, kind of like the housing, but more for business-related stuff. That's up, and that's nearly up 5%. That's at $115 billion. Right. Agriculture, farms, all things farming.

That's ticking up. Oh, you ticked up that tractor at farm days, field days. That'll add to this. I think so. I think that adds up. That goes into here rather than the consumer debt side of things or the business debt side of things. $63 billion, and the government's $94 billion in debt.

So when you're like, bloody government's sorted out, they're actually doing some of the best amongst us. Like agriculture's knocked on their door, business debt's higher, housing debt's higher. So maybe just think twice before you tick something up this weekend. I reckon the government should just, or someone should just wipe it all. And we just start clean. Yeah, because it's causing a lot of stress for people,

and we don't need that in our lives. But that and debt. That and debt. Well, just make more money. Like, print more of the money out. Okay. I know that's not going to happen. It's all bloody Robert Mugabe over here trying to solve that.

Do you know what happened in Zimbabwe, Caitlin? No. Hyperinflation. Okay. I know that's not going to happen. It's all bloody Robert Mugabe over here trying to solve that. Do you know what happened in Zimbabwe, Caitlin? No. Hyperinflation. And then your dollar becomes worth nothing. Okay. Yeah. And then internationally we're screwed. Everyone just needs to be a little bit more sensible, don't they?

That's better. Okay. All right. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Lewis Capaldi on ZM. Fletch, Rhonda Megan.

There was literally like with 20 seconds, 25 seconds to go, that song, we started really like passionately discussing Pickles and Gherkins. Like really, there was a lot of passion. Fletch was like, I love them on a burger, but then some days I'm disgusted by them. And he's like putting his headphones on and he's like getting in the mouse ready to like pause

to end the song. And Caitlin's like, what's the difference between a pickle and a gherkin? And I'm disgusted by them. And he's like putting his headphones on and he's like getting the mouse ready to like pause to end the song. And Caitlin's like, what's the difference between a pickle and a cucumber? And I'm like, different types of cucumber and how they're processed. And it's just like, rah, like a lot of pickle chat. And then it was like, and then it ends and goes, is it him? It just went from like zero to a hundred pickle chat and then back to zero super quick. But it's not even pickles we want to talk about. Somebody here at work.

I mean, I do. I would love to talk about pickles. Would you like to reach into a pickle chat for later? Yeah, okay. We've got space for a pickle chat. Pickle chat. But Goofens as well because we need to know the difference. Okay.

There is a Facebook drama here and someone we work with. No names. We've heard no names. Because we've been told maybe we shouldn't be talking about this, but we'll go ahead anyway. And also their sibling listens, so apparently. Oh, right. Okay.

Well, I think their sibling needs to might need to get a great. Let's treat this also as a family mending. Okay. Yeah. Because sibling A, who works here, noticed on sibling B's Snapchat that they were charging their new crystals in the Buck full moon.

I'm quite interested in full moons all have different names. I had a really bad sleep last night and then I came to work and everyone's like it's probably the full moon. No, it's the retrograde thing. What's that? Well, it's Mercury Plaza's in retrograde because they're pulling it down to build the thing and no one can get the wonton noodle that? And then I put my hand. Well, it's Mercury Plaza's in retrograde because they're pulling it down to build the thing

and no one can get the wonton noodle soup anymore. But I put my hand on Danny's salt crystal lamp. Yeah. And I felt so good after like 10 seconds. You felt really charged. I just felt the aura. Stop, guys. Come on.

So apparently sibling A who works here noticed sibling B's charging of the crystals and called her out and said, you can't believe in this BS. And Karen, do you know crystals, I was reading an article that millennials are replacing religion with crystals and this kind of whatever you like to call it. Oh no, because imagine

like 150 years, there'll be like wars over crystals. They'll be like, my pink crystal gives me superpowers. And someone else will be like, the blue crystal's the only true crystal. And then I'll be like, my pink crystal gives me superpowers and someone else will be like, the blue crystal's the only true crystal and then I'll be like, I'm 180 years old and you guys are arguing

over crystals? Come on now. Look, I personally don't believe in them but you're not hurting anyone with your crystal. This is true.

This is true. Unless you smack someone over the head with your crystal. Unless your crystal lamp starts a bedroom fire then you've hurt yourself. Then you've hurt yourself. Then you've hurt yourself and maybe your flatmates.

Presumably. So then sibling two, sibling B. No, you went A and B. Okay, so sibling B. We should have called them sibling C because C also starts with crystal. Anyway, so sibling B, crystal fan, takes an abject offense to this and blocks them and deletes them. On Facebook? On Snapchat.

So they can no longer see their stories, which by the sounds of it, they've become pretty crystal heavy. Yep. And then on Facebook, Sibling A tries to fix the, by saying, like, come on. That was just a joke. Mucking around. Yeah. It's just silly, like crystals.

And they've been left on scene. On the scene. They've seen the message, but left them on the scene. Yeah. Crystals are actually hurting people. They're tearing families apart. I think today, though,

once she's recharged her crystals and she's feeling the... What were you saying? Post-charge. Yeah, I'm saying that she might come back today and feel a lot more happy. Well, it depends what crystal she charged because everybody knows the pink crystal

is the only true crystal. Blue crystal! Blue crystal is the only true crystal! Pink crystal! Have you considered a life under the green crystal? But yeah, God is talking about people that are on Facebook and social media have these instances where family members either don't add them

or have deleted them or have blocked. And I'm guessing it's the classic mums or parents trying to keep an eye on their kids and then maybe they see a photo from a party or a Snap story, an Insta story, and they're like, oh, nah, mum's got to go. Because you can just mute like one person. Mum's got to go. There's another reason I'm so glad there wasn't social media when I was a teenager.

Like, looking back, I imagine how heartbroken your mum would be if she saw that you weren't friends anymore. Or she knew what you got up to. Yeah. That'd be worse. There's definitely things that I'm just like, mum, don't watch that. But a lot of siblings don't have their other siblings on Facebook. Or like Instagram.

Yeah, or they'll just hide them. But then that's another thing too, if there'd been Instagram and you were getting up to shenanigans, and even if mum and dad didn't have, I had a very gnarky older brother. So he would have like screencapped everything, documented it and presented it at family court. What would you have done?

Blocked. You'd have to block him. I mean, it's a great question. I probably would have blocked him. You probably would have blocked him. This is what I'm saying. A lot of siblings don't follow each other or have each other on Instagram, maybe on Facebook,

because no one's really uploading to Facebook anymore now. But it's your Insta stories and your Snap stories that are getting you in trouble. Yeah, because there's nothing like a sibling fight. They just, they can get out of control. So we want to know, 0800 dials at M9696,

you can text in, do you have a family social media fallout? Like whether it's on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat. Have you had a fallout with one of your family members? And where's it at now? Blocked them. Have you had a fallout with one of your family members? And where's it at now? Blocked them.

Have you been blocked? Have they been blocked? Auntie maybe. Maybe mum got too nosy. Nosing around. Because I mean, what's the worst that can happen if your mum's on? Your mum's just comments, isn't it? My mum, she just hijacks people's birthday posts.

That's her biggest face off. I'll be like, happy birthday. And underneath my mum will be like, hey, it's a very happy birthday. I'll be like, mum, post your own's birthday posts. That's her biggest face-off. I'll be like, happy birthday, and underneath my mum will be like, hey, it's a very happy birthday. I'll be like, mum, post your own bloody birthday greeting. There's etiquette here, mum. My mum follows some of my friends on Instagram, and she always messages me, and she's like,

did you see what she was up to? That's not appropriate on Instagram. I'm like, mum. I was right there. I just didn't tell you. Yeah, well, yeah, yeah, exactly. I think your mum told me off for swearing once on an Instagram story. She just wrote language.

I was like... Yeah, but she thinks that you guys are friends. It's weird. Okay, 0800-9666. Have you had a family social media fallout? Give us a call. So your family fallout on social media. Why have you blocked or why are you arguing with

family members on, I don't know, Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram? Somebody said, I had a fallout with my sister-in-law. She accused me of copying her ideas from her social media account. What, like photos and poses and stuff? What, legs on a sandy beach? Yeah. Or like a well-presented brunch.

Some people have themes to how they set them out. So like every photo will have, they'll make them like landscape so they've got white at the top. So then the theme of your Instagram, you know what I mean? Yeah, I do, yeah. What is landscape in square making the photo harder to see and annoying white lines around it? It's not your idea

though. Cool theme, man. It's not your idea. But anyway, we didn't see eye to eye for over a year and I didn't attend their wedding. Oh my God. Over an Instagram layout. Yeah. Come on. Nicole, this was your siblings?

Are they blocked? Yes, my two younger sisters. So it happened over Christmas. I uploaded on Instagram and Facebook a photo of me and Nana and my sisters got really jealous and were like, why didn't you put a photo of us up? Told mum and mum was coming down on me. And yeah, I just blocked them on all socials.

Wait, I don't understand why, why are they jealous? Wait, so you put a photo up with Nana and they're like, why weren't we in that photo? Yeah. Or did you say, get your goddamn photo with Nana?

Yeah, yeah. No, I did. I can't understand why Mum's coming out. They sound silly, Nicole. They sound silly. Oh, yeah, very much so, yeah. I couldn't be bothered with the drama, so I was like, right, you're gone. Is this resolved? I like this. I like this. Is this resolved now, Nicole? Oh, no, it gets mentioned at every

family gathering, to which I just play dumb and go, I don't know what you're talking about. Let it go. Yeah. Get your own photo with Nana. Ridiculous. Nicole, thanks for your call. Amy, this happened on Bebo.

Yeah, so 15 years later, my mum's still complaining about it. I specifically taught her how to, like, use it and make a page. And you remember the best friend pages with, like, the arrows? No. Bebo. No, I remember top eight friends on MySpace, and you could give out your daily love on Bebo. Yeah, but there was pages that you could add that were, like,

your best friend and had an arrow, and then you'd put your friends either side of it. Well, Mum had the arrow pointed to her best friend, lasted for about, I don't know, three days before she got replaced, and she still likes to complain of it. Well, mum had the arrow pointed to her sixth friend. Lasted for about, I don't know, three days before she got replaced and she still likes to complain about it. Wow. Do they talk in person?

Do you tell her that mum, like, did you ever tell mum that Bebo's not a thing anymore? Well, yeah, of course. It's long gone now, but at the time. Yeah, right. She just couldn't let it go. Mum still wants to be his friend. Thanks, Amy. Mal, this is your time. Yeah, right. She just couldn't let it go. Mom still wants to be his friend. Thanks, Amy. Mal, this is your mom. Are you friends with her on social media?

Currently, yes, I am. But yeah, I know my mom used to message me about 30 times a day on Facebook just about her random life updates. And it got to the point where I had to delete her on Facebook because she wouldn't stop messaging me. But she decided to proceed to hack my computer,

hack my Facebook, re-add herself and make it so I can't delete her anymore. And I continue to get less updates today, which is fine. How can you not delete mum? How can you make it so you can't be deleted? I don't know. I think any time I try to delete her, she just goes back on and re-adds herself. She just gets your password

and just re-adds herself. Mum's ruthless. I love it. Mum just wants you to know what she's having for lunch and what she's been doing. Oh, and the weather in the United States. And a dog she saw. And the dog and her shopping. But yeah, that's alright. Oh, but that's if Mum's in the United States

and you're all the way over here. That's not the easiest message. Thanks, Mel. Some more text messages but that's all right. Okay. Thanks, Mel. Some more text messages. My sister-in-law, lots of sister-in-law situations. Unfriended and blocked me on all social media because I got pregnant at the same time as her. What's stealing her thunder?

Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, because that's, yeah, like you planned that. Good, you're the only one having a baby. Congratulations. My mum announced to her five friends on Facebook she was going to be a grandmother and my sister-in-law went off her nut. And she hasn't spoken to my

mother since. Why? I don't know because it doesn't say the mother the grandma like announced it before the parents. That might have been an issue or maybe she just didn't want it. I can kind of see that. Yeah, but it's not a hold a grudge for ages thing, is it? No.

Yeah, we had to have a family meeting about a member of our family that everybody unfriended. Let's say they were very vocal in their Trump support. And everybody would just, it was not so much that we didn't think they were entitled to their opinion, but just that it was all that they ever posted about. Oh, right. Okay. Very homophobic, judgmental posts.

Not fun. Just not the sort of stuff you want in your timeline. So we all unfriended them. That's enough to not get invited to Christmas kind of stuff. Really, isn't it? Friday Flashback. It's my pack for Friday Flashback. I've left it so late and I'm just, oh.

I've been feeling the pressure. You need to start thinking about these things early in the week. I know, Iback, I've left it so late and I'm just, oh. I've been feeling the pressure. You need to start thinking about these things early in the week. I know, I do, I do. But I have gone for a song that, in the United States, was the ninth biggest song of the year. Anya's like, that's a rubbish song. You were throwing around some ideas before

and I think we hit a pot of gold and you've thrown that gold into the ocean and now you're going with this one. What song did you want me to play? The one that Bourne suggested. Oh no. No, Anya and I really wanted you to play Michael Bublé. We're not playing Michael Bublé. I just haven't met you yet.

What an absolute slapper. Well, you're more than welcome to choose that when it's your turn. Next week, tune in, the Booblay will be getting played. Is that even 10 years old? Yep, 2009. Yes, yes. Get out of here. Oh, can you just play it?

We're not playing Michael Booblay. Over my dead body. I just think you've got a chance to make a mark, you know. No. And really, really improve someone's day. And the boobs does that. The boobs does that. Boobs across the line will always make up for a better day. And the boobs does that. The boobs does that. Boobs across the line will always make it a better day.

Boobs in all departments. Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. Any day is a good day for the boobs. Okay. Well, it's not the boobs. I've gone for the eighth biggest song of the year in the US. In New Zealand, this made it to number six in the charts and was a top ten song in a lot of countries around the world

from when this artist was good. What? That's a big call. Controversial. It's from his album 808s and Heartbreaks. 808s and Heartbreaks. Does that ring a bell? Yeah.

It's Kanye West's album. Yeah, thank you. I don't know. I don't know we were playing the bloody tipping point, mate. I don't know you were Bradley Walsh and I had to get away from the chaser. You were just introing a song. We didn't know whether to sit an exam

before we were allowed to hear it. All right. It's Heartless Kanye. It's your Friday Flashback on CDM. I'm far along this road. He lost his soul to a woman so heartless how could you be so heartless how could you be so heartless how could you be so cold as the winter wind when it breeze yo just remember that you talking to me though you need to watch the way you talkin' to me, yo

I mean, after all the things that we've been through I mean, after all the things we got into Ayo, I know there's some things that you ain't told me Ayo, I did some things, but that's the old me And now you wanna get me back and you gon' show me So you walk around like you don't know me You got a new friend, well, I got homies But in the end, it's still so lonely

In the night I hear him talk The coldest story ever told Somewhere far along this road he lost his soul To a woman so heartless How could you be so heartless? How could you be so heartless? How could you be so heartless? How could you be so Dr. Evil? You're bringing out a side of me that I don't know

I decided we weren't gonna speak so Why we up 3am on the phone? Why don't she be so mad at me for? Homie, I don't know, she's hot and cold I won't stop, won't mess my groove up cause i already know how this thing go you're gonna tell your friends that you're leaving me they say that they don't see what you see in me you wait a couple months then you don't see you'll never find nobody better than me Tonight I hear him talk the coldest story ever told Somewhere far along this road he lost his soul

To a woman so heartless How could you be so heartless? How could you be so heartless? Talking, talking, talking, talk Baby, let's just knock it off They don't know what we've been through They don't know about me and you So I got something new to see

And you just gon' keep hating me And we just gon' be enemies I know you can't believe I could just leave it wrong and you can't make it right. I'm going to take off tonight into the night. I'm going to take off tonight into the night. Kanye, it's your Friday flashback on ZM. road, he lost his soul to a woman so heartless. Kanye, it's your Friday flashback on CDM. Remember at the end it sounds like a

Thomas Tang engine? I like to imagine he's just like puffing along the islands of Sodor, along those rails. What up? What up, Henry? Thomas, stop talking like that. What's the word, fat controller? It's the fat controller, Thomas. Stop talking like that.

That was good. Whoop, whoop. What's the feedback? Pretty bad. Yeah. I don't think you need it. It didn't go up enough, did it? Maybe not enough of a

banger but it's a great song. I mean it was the ninth biggest song of the year in 2009. Also it's good to just take a little bit of a thermometer of the nation. On the possibility the boobs could have been played. The Michael Burble. Oh yeah. Classic.

Next week tune in for the boobs. So what have we learned from this? Always listen to Caitlin and Anya Pull your socks up mate That's what's up Wow That's a real dad telegram Alright it's time for Am I a Bad Person Now we have received a message

And it is not from the 1950s It is from 2019 Vaughn, have you got the message yet? not from the 1950s. It is from 2019. Vaughn, have you got the message yet? Hi, guys. I have a problem with my girlfriend at the moment that I'm hoping you can help me with. She's just gotten a pay rise. Great.

What's the problem? And is now earning more than $20,000 more than me. Is now earning more than, on the higher side of $20,000 more than me. Okay's now earning more than on the higher side of $20,000 more than me. Okay. I'm really happy for her to do well at work. I just don't feel comfortable with it. I don't know why, but it's really getting to me.

I like to be the man of the house, treat her and look after her, et cetera, et cetera. Now I feel like she's the one carrying me. Wow. I'm really glad Megan's not here because you can just see her face get redder and redder and angrier and angrier at this. But he's not like saying...

What does it matter because you're together? I mean, I know maybe that you're not at the stage where you're married and you pull it or... Does he say... He doesn't say how long

he's been with her, does he? No. But, you know, you're together in it, aren't you? Makes it sound like they're at the point where they're living

together, though. Yeah. But is that a blow to the ego? Don't worry about that, my friend. Don't let that go. Goodness me. Vaughn, how would you feel if Sade earned more than you? I'd be absolutely stoked.

Do I have to come to work if she's earning more than me? I don't know. Is it like, because, I mean, I guess, yeah, back in the... I don't buy into all that. This might be a surprise to you. Yep. This might be a surprise,

but I don't buy into all of that like, stereotypical gender role stuff of a man must provide, a woman must stay at home. Is he saying that he wants to be able to buy her all the nice things

rather than her have more money and buy him things? I'm just wondering, like, this guy's background. Because this has to have come from somewhere, right? So I wonder if he grew up in a household where dad was always saying this sort of stuff. Yeah, right, maybe. Yeah. And maybe his friends are, like, maybe he's feeling pressure from his friends. Why would you feel?

I don't know. If I had a mate who said, oh, I'm feeling, I think my wife or partner or whoever's earning more money than me, I'd be like, why? Yeah. Yeah. Like, don't worry about it. Money will tear a relationship apart at the seams if you let it become an issue. Lots of my friends' females earn more than their husbands and have better jobs. And how do their husbands take that?

They don't care. I mean, I've never actually spoken to them one-on-one as the husband and been like, are you okay with this? No, because if you do that, if they were sweet with it before, but then you're coming in and you're like, are you okay with this? Then they'll be like, no, I'm not. It's not an issue. But they're married.

It's all their money. Exactly. Wouldn't you just want as much money coming into the relationship as you can? Don't you like money? And I'm pretty sure, I haven't actually asked him, but I think my boyfriend, hello, producer Caitlin here, I have a boyfriend now. I'm pretty sure he earns more than me.

But it's not. Have you not discussed finances? Nah. But what about that whole, when it comes to big purchases? Yeah. Do you think Where you don't buy what you can't afford Yeah but do you think There's a power play

When it comes to the person That earns more money Like they get more say They get more Like do you know Do you think they get the overall say Like hey no We're not buying this big purchase

Because You know you don't earn as much This is Vaughn This is me But that's just also me Even if I was not earning more money. Yeah. I'd be like, do we need it? Like that's my, do we need it?

Yeah. About anything, unless it's like a power tool. But that's where the problem comes. Or something that I really want. Like you have to sit down with your partner in a relationship and say, because that's where the fighting would come in if someone's going to shame the other person for not earning as much money and then you can't buy something that you want.

If you're in a relationship where someone's like, you're not earning as much money as me, start. You'd be a bit like, this is not a relationship built on any sort of healthy foundations. We're not like that, but a lot of people are about the money, aren't they? And the status and the whole, you know. So, I mean, I think he is a bad person.

Same. Yeah. But I'd love to know, and, you know, we're asking the question, is this guy a bad person? But also, like, have you been in the situation where it has been a problem, where your partner or you have earned more, and there have been arguments over it? Because I just can't imagine in this day and age there is,

but there obviously is. But then like, okay, so then a text message comes in like this. You are a bad person. Work harder, lazy bum. So what if she's in an industry that just has hire and he has work his ass off and he's not earning as much. So I don't think it particularly helps to say he's a bad person because he's not working hard enough.

Because he could only be able to earn a certain amount of money. He might have hit the ceiling of the pay for what he's qualified to do. Okay, well, 0800-DARLS-IT-M, 9696. Is he a bad person? Because he feels insecure about the fact that his wife earns, or no, his girlfriend earns more money than him. 20k more. Maybe you've been in this situation.

9696 to text 0800 dials it in. Am I a bad person? Please just show me a look and it's one of those husband-wife looks. It's like, you shut up and wait for the intro. If I get that from Sade, I'm like, oh, what have I done? And I get it from Fletch, I'm like, what am I about to do?

Very interesting. Am I a bad person today? Someone emailed in saying that they've got a bit of a problem. Their girlfriend just got a pay rise, and this now means they earn more than $20,000 more than him. Now, really happy for her. So that's like, he's not like, I want her to fail. I want her to be miserable so she relies on me and she can never leave.

So it doesn't feel like an entrapment thing. He said, I don't know why. It gets to me. I want to treat her, look after her, make her feel like the princess she is. And I don't feel like I can do that at the moment. It's 2019. Yeah. Like, make her a macaroni card.

Princesses love macaroni cards. And just, you're together. It's all your money, right? Yeah, well, not in some situations of fear, just started out. Thinking about the future, if you're going to get married, it's all good news, right? Yeah. Well, that's what I think as well.

Pan of worms. Yeah, isn't it? Man, we've had some text messages in. Because I thought it was such an old-fashioned way of looking at things. Same. But it's honestly, some people, it's not. It's like a real hit to the ego and the manhood, isn't it? Yeah. I earn twice as much as my partner.

I'm a female. Yeah. He has told me he feels emasculated by this. Two years since I got onto this pay, he seems to have just tried to embrace it and tells people I'm a sugar mama. So time, he got over it. He got used to it. He saw the benefits of it.

Somebody said that their wife is the bread earner. She owns her own business. Okay. And makes a lot more money than he does. But for 15 years, he supported her trying to get it off the ground. And he's like, absolutely no worries with her making the money until she publicly announces herself as the family's bread earner. And he says, for 15 years, I never bought that up.

Oh, yeah. So now that the boot's on the other foot, I don't think it should be something we throw around. Okay. Well, let's take your calls. Natasha, is he a bad person? I don't think he's a bad person, but I'm in this situation. So I just got a new job

about six weeks ago and I am earning a substantial amount more than him at the moment but he earned a lot more than me but he just got into a new job to develop his career so it's like complete opposite shoes

at the moment right yeah so he used to buy everything and he was like the breadwinner in our relationship. But now it's kind of me. And so how is he taking that? I think he's happy.

He's like, oh, can you buy me this? Can you buy me that? And I think he's quite happy about it now because I can afford to pay for stuff. And you said he's made a change because of his career, so he obviously sees the value of being happy with what he's doing and working towards earning the money versus being miserable and earning more money than you.

But no, I don't think he's miserable that I earn more than him now. I think it's, but he was always in that kind of old school approach that he wanted to earn more than me. Right, but it's just, and now he's kind of comfortable with it. It's so, it's, yeah, it's so weird. Just taking a bit of time. Okay, all right, thanks, you call.

Let's go to Emma. Your ex-partner, you're in a similar situation. Yeah, this ended up actually, it wasn't a main driver, but it kind of ended up tearing our relationship apart. Because you earned more money than him? Yeah, well it would, yeah definitely, like if we needed something new, like for example

we needed a new TV, and it was like okay cool, let's save up, like you know we had droids accounts and all that kind of stuff, and then I was just like, actually, I can afford this. So I just went out and bought a new TV. And he, like, lost his mind. Because he came from a – he comes from a family where it's, like, father of the family, bread earner, you take care of your wife, you take care of your children, all that kind of stuff, which is really old school.

Yeah. But, yeah, I was just kind of, like, upset that I was, like, I'm doing, like, a nice thing. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, come on. Can you appreciate it? And it's going to come around eventually.

Like, I don't care about money and all that kind of stuff. If you're going to be present in the relationship. Oh, we've lost her. She's not present in this conversation. We'll do that a lot better. Oh, you bet. We just lost you for a bit there, Emma. But great, great points.

We'll go to Stephen now. Stephen, you've been in the same boat as well? Yes. How's it morning, guys? Morning, morning. So do you think going back to the email, the original question, is he a bad person? No, I don't think he's a bad person.

I look at it a bit differently because, you know, boys and their toys. So when I – my missus was earning more money than me at the stage. Times have changed now, but, like, I've got a job and – well, in a position now I'm earning more money. But, yeah, it was difficult. And if I wanted – I'm a bit of a fisherman and I play golf and I do a bit of everything. So whenever I wanted to pop into the shop and, you know,

get a fishing rod or buy anything extra, I had to kind of call the missus and be like, oh, can I maybe get this? Is that all right? Whereas now it's a bit different, you know, making a bit more money. I feel, oh, if I need something, I can get it. Right.

But that would be the same for her if she wanted to go buy a new pair of shoes or a fishing rod. Yeah. Oh, I don't know. It's just different. I just felt that way. She never minded. But I just felt it. I just felt, oh, you know, I'm actually using more of her money than my money. You know, I'm very different with her.

I'd love to spend all of her money. I don't know. I'd see a problem with that. I'd spend all of it. You just had a problem with it because you feel the man should be the provider. Is that what you think? Not really the provider. I mean, I know, you know, like you say, times have changed and, you know, she, a woman,

provide now and things like that. But, yeah, it just goes on with that. You know, I've just always, you know, I grew up in a family like that and I can see where he's coming from if it's that case. My dad was always a breadwinner. My mom never worked. She looked after the kids at home, and, you know, so that's how I was brought up. And she's in a career.

She's an occupational therapist, so. Okay. Yeah. All right. Okay, well, thanks, Stephen. Good to hear that side. I think this text sums it up pretty well. I had a boyfriend who bought me a new car, a new TV, and threw money around because he had it,

but wasn't there emotionally. Money is not the be-all and end-all of a relationship. Spoiler with time, because the initial email said that he's worried he can't treat her. Spoiler with time, rather than getting a job that takes all your time, because she's in a relationship with you and not your money. That's a really good text.

That's how we should look at life all the time. But time can't buy a new TV, can it? Can it? Has anyone asked? Hey, clock, can you buy me a new TV? No, don't ask clock. That's just the purveyor of time. We've got to find out a way to communicate

with time itself. Daddy time. Daddy. Daddy time. We've got to find out a way to communicate with time itself. Daddy time. Daddy. Daddy time. It's the new take on father time. Daddy time. TV please. So what did we sum up from that in terms of

is he a bad person? People aren't saying it's weird. It's a weird one. He's not a bad person. They're just saying he's just got to get over this thing in his mind. So if you were going to put it on one side of the coin, you would say bad. Okay. Bad habits. Fact of the day, day the man who invented dry cleaning

used the money he made off the patent to buy his wife and children out of slavery. Wow. How amazing, right? This guy, Thomas Jennings, he was born in 1791, so a very long, long time ago. He was one of the first African-Americans to be granted a patent. He was a slave in his early life, but then when the Emancipation Proclamation was signed and certain slaves were freed, he got to go free. However, his wife, Elizabeth,

and their children didn't fall under the category. So I didn't know this, but it was like a gradual, like one day they were like, you're free. It's like, first of all, if you have worked for 28 years of hard labor, you're free. And so that's how he got to go free.

But his wife was younger and his children hadn't served these apprenticeships which basically means you've been owned by somebody 28 years for man 25 years for woman

so they hadn't they hadn't served their time yet so they weren't able to be freed and there was some time

so he went to New York and he was a tailor that was the skill he'd learnt when he was a slave he was a tailor so he started making skill he'd learnt when he was a slave. He was a tailor, so he started making suits and he invented this way of cleaning clothes without having to wet wash them.

Because how does dry cleaning work? I have briefly looked into it and I can tell you, no idea. Because they just spray it, don't they? Or steam it. Is that how they do it? I've got no idea. Someone message him. So the original way

of doing it was using a non-water based solvent to remove stains, but it was very flammable. So often there'd be these just massive fires at dry cleaning factories because the chemicals they were using were so flammable. But over time it's changed. I've googled. Do you want the answer?

Dry cleaning. It's a process that cleans clothes without water. The cleaning fluid that is used is a liquid and all garments are immersed and cleaned in a liquid solvent. The fact that there is no water is why the process is called dry. But they do get wet.

But it's just with a solvent. Yeah. Rather than water and surf liquid. Does that mean if I dry clean my suit and someone smokes a ciggy next to me, I could go up in flames? No, because it's a non-flammable solvent now. Oh, kilda, thank you.

After World War I, they began using chlorinated solvents. That's why some things can't be, some materials can't be dry cleaned. There's a thing on the label, it's like, don't dry clean. And dry cleaners will be like, I can't clean that.

But like woolen stuff can be dry cleaned rather than washed because it doesn't wash well. Right. So anyway, he invented it. When he invented it, it was US Patent 3306X. I looked that up. I can tell you, unfortunately, there was a massive fire at the patent office in 1836

and they were all destroyed. Little is known about this patent. No drawings and little description, but it was called dry scouring when he invented it. So now anyone can do dry cleaning. Is it one of those patents that... That expired? Or is anyone can do it? It's weird.

I don't know. I don't know, because he invented dry scouring. It's changed a little bit since then. But anyway, it took off. Yeah. Because people were like,

my woolen suit, everything is looking great. So it took off and he started earning a fair bit of money from it. He sold rights to use the patent to other people

and made himself a little bit of money. And then he sold rights to use the patent to other people and made himself a little bit of money. And then he went back to find where his wife and children were and he bought them off the slave owners. Wow. Otherwise, they would have waited more years in slavery or apprenticeships, as they were calling them, post-

It's crazy. What is it? Abolition? No, abortion. What is it called Abolition? No, Abulsion. What is it called? Why is it? Got rid of it. Anyway, after they got rid of slavery,

he went back and bought his wife and children out of slavery. So today's fact of the day is the guy that invented dry cleaning used the money to buy his wife and children out of slavery. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Megan's away today with carpal tunnel syndrome. Carpal karaoke syndrome, whatever it is. She's had an operation On her handy wrist

Producer Caitlin You're in In Megan's hot seat And you've got your keep cup As you save the world Single handedly Well I've had a keep cup for ages Because I just think

They're really chic And yeah Every time you get a coffee It's plastic Plastic lid Yes Maude Caitlin Having looked into keep cups

I've got one at home, but it's mostly just for when I make a coffee, but I need to go, like, pick the kids up from school or do something that involves movement. Otherwise, I just use... Wait, are you talking about a keep cup or a thermos? No, no, no. It's a keep cup.

Yep. Otherwise, when I'm at home, I just use the throwaway paper ones. Okay, yeah. That's good. Of course I've got a paper. It's a ceramic cup, so that's the ultimate keep cup. no idea. Of course I've got a paper. Ceramic cup. So that's the ultimate keep cup. Yeah.

But the one I've got is plastic. Now you've got a glass one with a cork, a cork band to obviously shield your hand from the heat. Is there a difference between the plastic and the glass?

This is Sheikah. It's just primarily aesthetics. Yeah. So when we do a coffee run, sometimes Intern Anya will go over with our cards and she'll just get us coffees. Now, you gave her your cup today

and it was manky. It was yesterday's coffee in the keep cup. Well, I finished it. I said, you'd finish it, but you could still see the manky coffee residue that's in the keep cup. And I said, are you not going to clean that before you go over to the cafe?

And I said, no, they clean it for you. That's not a... That was where we were immediately aghast. They do. It is a thing because they just rinse it out before... So, in turn, Nan, you walk me through this. You go over for the coffee run. You hand over Producer Caitlin's manky coffee cup.

Yeah, firstly, I say, hey, I'm really sorry. I've got to make six separate orders because I'm the most punishing customer you had this morning. And then I hand over a dirty cup that's still got maybe 20 mils of coffee in it. And I'm like, sorry for that as well. Thank you. And so they have no problem washing this? It depends who is on.

See? Depends who's on the till. No. I've left it like that for a week in once. And I do apologise, but also it takes like two seconds. It's not their job to wash your keep cup. No, I know, and I'm not expecting them to like, you know, put dishwashing

liquid and stuff. Just like rinse it out because they're going to put coffee back in it. You rinse it out before you take it. Yeah, but... It's on you. This isn't a them thing. I don't know. No, but they're like... This isn't like a Belgian beer cafe where they've got that thing where they get the glass and they put it upside down and they scrub it on the thing and then they scrub the water off. Oh, I like those.

Me too. Those are real cool. Some coffee places have them. Don't they? Across the road, aren't you? Do they have that? No, they don't have one. I don't think they have that.

I haven't seen it myself. So when they go to watch Caitlin's Cup, do they have to go into the kitchen out the back? I don't know. I never watch. We don't want the cute boy at the cafe across the road to be angry with us. You know the one I'm talking about? I know the one you're angry with us You know the one I'm talking about I know the one you're talking about I know the one you're talking about We all know

We all know But it gives him a chance It gives you an excuse To talk to him No but he won't want to talk to you Because you're manky You're manky You're manky

Guys On a scale of one To being offensive This is like one Or two If one or two Is the highest No

Lowest It's fine No it's manky If Megan was here We could ask her for a Definitive Like one or two. If one or two is the highest. No, lowest. It's fine. No, it's manky. If Megan was here, we could ask her for aid. As she is a cafe, well, we've had some text messages in. What are they saying? Someone said, no, that is not a thing, Caitlin. I work in a cafe.

Yes, we'll clean your cup if we have to, but clean your own cup. Yeah, it's so lazy. We've got lots of coffees to make. We don't have time to clean every cup. And then if we just give it a quick rinse and it's not clean to the standard expected, it reflects poorly upon us. But then here's an idea. So you're only getting one coffee a day in the morning.

What if you are a keep cup user, but you're out and about? Say you were travelling for your job. You didn't have a chance to wash your cup. That's me. I don't have a chance. That's not you. There's a kitchen out there. Yeah, okay.

Would that be acceptable or would you just, should you just wash it in a basin in the toilet? Are you talking if you like pull into a BP? Well, yeah, anywhere. They've got a sink.

Exactly. The cafes have a sink. But it's not for you. Oh my God. Someone was like, sis, wash your own keep cup. Oh no, I feel bad.

Yes, you are a bad person. We've moved on from am I a bad person, but this is why we didn't need one for this because we usually was. Yeah. Wash your own keep cup. Especially as soon as you walk past a sink to go to the cafe. To go to the cafe. Do you know, actually, Anya should have washed it

because she was the one taking it. Doing the coffee run. To go do the coffee run. So I like Anya. Excuse me. You're her boss. You're her boss. You're her boss. Manky Merritt,

pipe down. Do not, that's not sticking. Manky Merritt. Hey, please don't speak to your supervisor like that. Yeah. Miss Manky Merritt.

She sits in Megan's chair. It's a written warning. Gets this bloody attitude. Arnie, give me another coffee, but wash it out first. Very cheeky. Very rude.

But if I get to go see the coffee boy across the road Yeah I'll wash it out Alright ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast If you enjoyed this podcast Why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app

Or wherever you get your podcasts And music lives here ZM