ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - July 30 2018

Episode Date: July 29, 2018

Megan had some serious drama go down over the weekend, Community Notices and how did your parents get you to eat food?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Spark. You can stay connected with free Wi-Fi a gig a day on the $19 Spark prepaid rollover pack. Enjoy. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Good morning. Good morning. How are we feeling after your party?

A little bit tired. Did you get drunk? Did Megan get drunk? No. Yeah. I got a video of her putting her friend Ellie on her shoulders and doing squats, which is weird. No, because she's sat on my shoulders. And I was like, I reckon I can lift you.

It's what CrossFitters do when they go out drinking. But she was just sitting on my shoulders, so I was like, I'm going to lift you up because she's super light. Because I recall the whole getting on the shoulders was quite ceremonial. Just get up there. Oh, here we go. A born-smith yarn. It wasn't like that at all.

In a room full of white people, someone's like, put on Mr. Brightside. And James and I are like, uh-oh. And everybody only sung the chorus, and then it got to the verses, and they're like, Mr. Brightside. And James and I were like, uh-oh. And everybody only sang the chorus and then it got to the verse and they're like, Mr. Brightside. What was that? Hell of a knees up. Had a cup of tea towards the end of things.

Caitlin was making one. I was like, I'll have a cup of tea. It was a good cup of tea and a slice of cake. I felt like my mum and dad when they finished a night out. Yeah, they're like, five minutes and we're leaving. Yeah, then one said to us five minutes and we're leaving. Well, then I pressed

the Uber button. Oh, yeah. Yeah, fair enough. I was like, five minutes. I can't,

so Caitlin actually made it through dry July. Yeah. Wow. We'll get still breaker in the next couple of days. I really thought,

I really thought. Caitlin drove, but did she like not drink anything? I don't know. She drank a cup of drove, but did she, like, not drink anything? I don't know. She drank a cup of tea, but... Skeptical. Because there was a couple of empty bottles of rosé,

and I'm like, hmm. Oh, she might have had a glass. Yeah. I don't think you can have a glass on dry July. It doesn't mean don't get drunk July. It means don't have any alcohol July. At all. Yeah.

Right. All right, you lot, listen up. It's Storytime. Storytime. Three news headlines for three stories that are found online. Odd, interesting, unusual news stories. Vordermagen pick one of the following three headlines.

Headline one, world's second oldest person moves up a spot. Headline two, estate sale goes off with a bang. And headline three, blind woman adds service to Uber. So one is the world's oldest person's died again.

Yeah. Which we like to keep tabs on. You don't last long. Yeah, not a title you want to have because you know that you're... Your time's limited. Yeah, not a title you want to have because you know that you're... Your time's limited. Yeah. Really limited.

Estate sale goes off with a bang. Estate as in like someone's died and all their stuff is being sold? Yeah, that's an estate sale, isn't it? Yeah. They sell it all. Right. Why is that? A deceased estate.

The company, not the company, the family, do they not want it all? Or they just want to get rid of it? They would rather have the money. Okay, so they just get rid of everything. And they sell the house and everything in it. Yeah, or there might have been a thing in the will saying split it evenly and everyone's like, well, that's a nightmare. Yeah, okay. So, yeah, some people can go in and

take certain things, but that would come off their right. It would have to be valued. Okay, well, should we go with that one? Yeah, okay. What was the third one again? Blind woman adds service to Uber. Hmm.

No, go with estate. Okay. Goes off with the bank. Okay. All right, well, we go now to Lexington, where an estate sale was happening. Now, this estate sale was at the home of a former explosives hobbyist. A man who loved...

Like fireworks and explosives. Yeah. So anyway, witnesses told Lexington police that a man that was shopping at the estate sale unintentionally lit what police determined was an improvised explosive device made out of a lighter. So I don't know if this old mate who'd passed away made a lighter bomb, but anyway, this guy picks it up

while he's sifting around all of granddad's old stuff and sets off a bomb. And lights it. Oh my God. Because that's the first thing anybody does when they pick up a lighter is flick it to light it. Yeah, I know. So he received serious injuries to his hand and upper body

and another man received a cut to his leg and a woman suffered concussion-like injuries. That's it. That's the story. Be careful if you are. If it was an explosives hobbyist and one part goes off, the rest of the house Would soon follow I'd imagine

Do you think that was like He's like well I'm not on this earth long I'm going to rig up my house Rig it up to explode I'm going to make some booby traps I don't know You must hate your family Because you assume your family

Is going to be the first lot To go through for a little bit of a Well that's what I wonder If he's done Whoa Hence the family Were probably like Okay we'll let people

Go through this and explode themselves rather than us. Yeah. Maybe. That oldest person that died was 117. I know, old, right?

And Japanese. And the person who's taking over the title or that needs verification is 115. So two years younger and also Japanese. I'll tell you what it is.

It's bento boxes. That's why I always got a bento box. How much tempura veggies do you think they're having? We only get a couple of pieces. So you're not overindulging in the fried food. And then you're getting a little bit of, you know, your veggies. Christ, I love tempura food. I know.

Tempura anything. And rice. Like, who says we're not allowed carbs? They're living for years. Rices? If my carb intake was limited to rice, that'd be fine, but it's just potatoes and bread that'll get me every time. And lollies and chocolate and cake.

Yeah, all the good stuff. FM. Google has announced it is rolling out a little fix for an awkward thing that's been happening. Google autocomplete fail. So they have more than a thousand words that are banned from an algorithm because then it would come up with

naughty things for autocorrect. It is just words that they've thought, okay, these are rude. But this one sentence, there's no word in there that's rude, but put together as a sentence, it's no word in there that's rude, but put together as a sentence, it's describing something

sexy time. Okay, right. So people are writing, sit on and... I'm going to do this now. Sit on... Google is... Online courses. Okay. Online courses. So the worst like... Sit on the fence. This is good. Sit on the mat.

But this isn't a problem with you Googling it in Google. It's Android users typing it in their phones. So when you write sit on on an Android, it comes up with my face at the end. Wow. Okay, wow. I was going to just say if it worked on my phone, but I'm not going to do that in a text message to my dad. When I just put sit on, the worst one I get is

the fourth one, sit on you. But that could not be sexual. That could just be sitting on. If that is your idea of how to talk sexy to somebody, then you need to work on that. Sit on top kayaks is next. You'd like one of those? No, I prefer a sit

inside. I'm a little top heaver myself, so I might wobble off. Because you've talked about kayaking to work, and one day I do want to see that. Yeah. But some people have even complained that just writing sit, it autocompletes. So someone wrote to their babysitter,

hey, are you free to sit? And then it autocompleted on my face. And you know how sometimes that... Oh, no. That's been busted. Their babysitter's been like... Excuse me. What? Ititter's been like... What? It was autocorrect.

What? Yeah. So now they're going to put in certain phrases as well as like keywords to make sure that, you know, when you're writing sentences... Wait, literally I've composed the message in my iPhone and I wrote sit on my and there's bed, side or couch. It's not even the sexy option. Yeah, but then if I put F, sit on my and there's bed side or couch there's not even the sexy option yeah but then

if I put F sit on my face and I'll send that to you Fleetch that's not thank you sit on what are you

no sit on my futon and then what you know that gives you the three word options on hang on space on the

your here the your or here yeah go with your, or here. Yeah. Go with your. Okay. Sit on your couch.

Insta. Face. Oh, there you go. Face. Insta. Yeah. Sit on your Insta. Sit on your Insta.

Instagram. Yeah. Sit on your face. I don't know why that's here. Why? But why can't I add swear words to my iPhone? You can. How?

This is how you do it. You go to create new contact. No, that doesn't work. I've tried that. That's an urban legend. It worked for me. Are you sure? Yeah.

And you can go into that one where it auto changes. You can put like OMW and it will automatically expand it to on my way. Oh, yeah. And you can add swear words into that. Can you? Because nobody is ducking. Let's be honest. Let's be honest.

How many messages do you write where that comes up? It always blew my mind. No one's doing that. Ducking's not even a word. What swear word would I expand it to?

Cynthia. Oh, okay. You should be able to work it out. It's only the first four letters of Cynthia. But if you wrote that word, it would often just be like, oh, you mean Cynthia.

It's like, I do not. Fletchbourne and Megan's Community Notices. Hello and welcome to Community Notices, a segment of the show where we have a look at what's happening on your local Facebook page. Megan, your Facebook page, we're placed to be on Saturday night, not because of Megan's party, but because of a boat explosion. I had so many requests, you know,

like you get requests to accept people onto that page. I was like, no, I want to keep the excitement for myself. Oh, right. Can anybody approve? I think so, yeah. People got loose admin. Usually the admins keep that sort of thing. And also, you don't want rubberneckers on your social media rubberneckers.

Yeah. I was like, no, you can't just join when something exciting happens. I'm going to be there for the good and the bad. The news was rubbish with pictures and video from that boat explosion. Nothing. I couldn't see anything. Well, you just see fire. The meth lab?

We don't know. Don't want to speculate, actually. Well, I love to speculate. I couldn't see anything. Well, you just see fire. A meth lab? We don't know. Don't want to speculate, actually. Well, I love to speculate. I will. Boats just blow up sometimes, don't they? Do they? You know what else blows up sometimes? Meth labs.

Right, okay. So we're not going out to the Herald Island community page, but a bit Marge local neighbourhood watch was all over there. She would have been in her element. It was. She's going to have to up patrols after this. I would say so. Do you know, we were getting reports from other community notice pages, like Hobsonville, we were getting like, we were tagging.

They were like, what's happening over there? And then they had a better like vantage point, so we were getting photos in from that page. It was very cute. Good working together there, community pages. Let's start community notices with a trip over the Tasman. This is from one of our Australian listeners

who belongs to the Arbor North Community Group where somebody lost their baby. What do you mean? Leaf posted on this page, hey there, can someone in level six look out for a 14-month-old baby in their level? Wife cannot get to her. Wife waiting downstairs in lobby.

And then it comes another message. Hi, can anyone on level six please go out into the hallway and have a look for our baby? She managed to get off on level six, but we live on level seven and thus cannot swipe on to level six. Please bring her to the ground level. My wife will be waiting in the lobby. I'm upstairs So what, she just got off

Or somebody got off without their baby Or the kid just ran off Yeah, or the kid got in and went down And jumped off And to the best of their deductions The level 6 was where it stopped And then it came back up and the kid was gone Oh no

No update No update if No update. No update if they found them. Found the baby or not. Oh, my God. Oh, God. But, yeah, babies, skiddly-dee. To St. Clair, this came through on the My Little Local app.

Okay. Which is an app much like Community Pages. Yeah. You can see what's happening, you know, within a radius of where you live. So this was a notification sent in from someone in St. Clair Beach in Dunedin. If you see an object floating in the ocean, it is not a surfer. It is reported to be a cow that has fallen off a cliff. So a cow fell into the cold.

And do they float? They do, eh? Cows. Yeah, they can float. Because they get all gassy and bloaty, don't they? Yeah. But no, this one might still be alive. It doesn't say that it's necessarily dead.

Yeah, right. If the cliff was into deep water, if it It doesn't say that it's necessarily dead. Yeah, right. If the cliff was into deep water, if it was shallow, then it's probably just dead. Yeah. Well, that's not great. Let's pop up the road a little bit to the new Brighton Community Buy, Sell, Trade and Trade page of Christchurch, New Zealand. That's quite a mouthful.

Alina's got something for sale. Anyone interested in buying bottles? $5 per bottle. And then there's hundreds of them lying around, big ones, but there are some small ones. And someone in the house loves tucking into a big box of Jim Beam bourbon by the looks of things. Many a bottle had.

Take the label off. That's quite a good looking bottle. I mean, I think any majorly successful alcohol brand, the shape of the bottle does play a part in it. And a lot of people, you know, they make their own relish or sauces at home. That would be a great bottle for a sauce actually because it's got a wide opening at the top. Maybe if you're just distilling your own booze. True, true.

It might be a great bottle for that. So yeah, you're right. It could probably actually save you some money in the meantime. Good to see they're saving. You know, that's reuse, rejuice, re-cycle-y thingy me, Bob. Next to see they're saving. You know, that's reuse, reduce, re- Exactly. Cycle-y thingy me, Bob. Next, this is a one. This is an interesting posting.

See if you can see. I'll read it and you stop me when you think we get to the part that you find interesting. Okay. Jenny writes, in the Kumu and Huapai

district community group, one of our staff is going on leave soon and we need a temporary replacement. They'll be starting in the next couple of weeks, training for three to four hours a day and this will increase to five to six hours a day over the month of September.

You'll be packaging ice cream into boxes so ideally you'd be someone with very small hands. Monday to Friday. Must be available until October 5th. What? Why do you need small hands? I don't know.

I've been trying to work it out. Packaging ice cream. Ice creams? So imagine you're putting ice creams, you need to stack them in. Yeah, maybe. But if you were just doing one row at a time, why would you need small hands? I don't know. Get them down the side and then

straighten the fingers and remove them straight up. I've never worked in ice cream packaging. I might be on the butt of this one. People who have worked in ice cream packaging are laughing. Of course you need small hands. You idiot. Of course.

Of course you need small hands. And finally, from the East Auckland Grapevine, Katrina's tried her best, but she writes, I have a John Cena backpack to give away. John Cena, the wrestler. Yeah. Famously, you can't see me, waves his hand in front of his face. Yeah. I got it for my son, but it turns out he likes John Cena memes,

not the wrestler. Mum was trying. Brand new, unused PME for pick up address. Okay, got you this. You like this. Yeah, I've seen you with this on the Facebook. Haven't you like a bit of that? That's like liking Nickelback memes and then someone getting you the album.

You're like, no, no, no. But I've seen you talking about what was on Joey's head. What's wrong with you? Yeah, those are today's community notices. If you see anything on your local Facebook page, screen cap it and send it to ours. FVMZM on Facebook. Fletch. Vaughan.

And Megan. The podcast. There has been a study that's been done in the UK to help us from overeating when we go out. But I go out to overeat. What's the point of going out if it's not for overeating? No, but like if you, maybe it's like for females who are watching What They Eat

or something, or for anyone who's watching What They Eat, when you go out, if you have to go out, you, this could be a really good trick to help you, even if you order something that's like a little bit more unhealthy. Okay. So the idea is when you get to the restaurant, straight away, when you order,

ask for a doggy bag. So not after you've finished the meal, ask before the meal comes for a doggy bag. So not after you've finished the meal. Ask before the meal comes for a doggy bag. I don't get it. Because then if you know, they reckon if you know the food is going to waste, you're more likely to finish what's on your plate. So you know that when they take it back to the kitchen,

they're going to throw it out. Yep. And so you're more likely to try and finish it because you paid for it. You're like, I don't want it to be wasted. Yep. But if there's a doggy bag on standby, you're like, to try and finish it because you paid for it. You're like, I don't want it to be wasted. But if there's a doggy bag on standby, you're like, well, if I don't, I'm going to eat until I'm full and then the rest of it I'm going to take home with me because you can literally see it beside you.

So the doggy bag comes out empty and you have to fill your own doggy bag. Yeah. Oh. Or you could take your own little systema container. You could. Or a clack. Take it out from Tupperware.

Well, that's the thing. I don't like when you go and get food and they give it to you in that single-use plastic stuff. They clack it in. But then polystyrene's

no better. Yeah. Maybe that's the secret. When I order Tynex, I say, cook it, but don't put it in anything. I'll bring my own containers.

People would do that, right? Yeah, totally. Yeah. But it must be weird for the person who's got it all cooked, but you have to be like, I'm here. There you go. Put it in this container. This old hokey pokey ice cream container.

It's durable. I'm hoping to get quite a bit of use out of it. But then would they want to do that? Because they could be putting their food into your container but there could be germs in there and then they get blamed for it. Wow, I mean that's on you. I would have that written right above the thing that says no pay

wave. I'd say if you bring your own containers you can't complain about getting sick. But I remember doggy bags were in the news a while ago and that was one of the reasons some places didn't like doing doggy bags because people would go home and reheat their food, get sick, and blame the place.

Or leave it in their fridge for four days and then eat it in a vulnerable state and then get sick from that. But it's still better than wasting all that food because they are just going to throw it out. And I guess it would make you eat less. No, it probably wouldn't, to be honest. Not me. Just still eat it.

No, I'd just eat it on the way home. And then I'd have a tiny little bit left over, and I'd be like, oh, there's no point taking that home. I'd just eat it. I'd just eat it, yeah. Or I'd just push it in. I don't know if that would work for me. I'm like that with everybody.

Like, when we go out with the family, if anybody leaves anything on the plate, I'm like, oh, pass it here. I'm going to be sick, mate, but nothing's going to waste around here. All right. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Hello there. Today's Top Six.

The Top Six things Winston's done to Jacinda's office in the six weeks that he has been temporary Prime Minister. What is the official fill-in? Reliever? Deputy. Yeah, I don't know. Deputy Acting Prime Minister. That's what it is. That's Acting Prime Minister.

While Jacinda's been on six weeks maternity leave. She's coming back with some next week. So he gets the big Prime Minister's office, doesn't he? Yeah, he gets to sit in the office. Yeah. Who's, because our boss is away. Ross Boss. Yeah. Who's acting Ross Boss? Isn't it Gary?

Well, Caitlin's saying it's her. I am acting CEO of ZM. I was there when you were like, Ross, I'm in charge A, and he said no. I'm pretty sure I think it's Soundkeeper Gary, or former Soundkeeper Gary. Well, him and I sharing the roles.keeper Gary or former Soundkeeper Gary. Absolutely not. Well, him and I

sharing the roles. He's a walk over the way. Gary? Yeah. Yeah, that means I got a message from the boss last week so that's an HR complaint

waiting to happen. It was hot though. It actually helped my back quite a bit. Yeah, no, he's a magic fingers. He touched me with his magic fingers.

That's what I'll say to HR. He still falls for the Gary. Whereas if you try that on Ross, he's like, no. Yeah. He's wise to it. So the top six things Winston's done to Jacinda's office, number six, he's fiddled with the air con, so now it's really hot. You know how I'll be like, love it when it's like too hot?

Yeah. You walk into your nan's house, you're like, Jesus, nan, you've got to take off all your clothes. It's 80 degrees. She's like, nan, you've got to take off all your clothes. It's 80 degrees. She's like, oh, got a blanket and stuff. Oh, the windows are getting colder. They feel the cold more, don't they? They do.

Yeah. Circulation thing. It's like your granddad's running the country. Yeah. Crank it right up. Burn some tyres. Global warming can't come fast enough. Number five on the list of the top six things Winston's changed in Jacinda's office. He changed her computer display so the font's really, really big.

Yeah. Old people love a big font. It's like he's got his own phone because my dad on his phone, he's like, oh, look at this. And he showed me this message from one of his mates. It's a joke or something. They love texting each other jokes. Yeah, don't they? Jesus, the font was huge. I had to do a lot of scrolling to get through the whole... The whole joke. The whole joke each other jokes. Yeah, don't they? Jesus, the font was huge. I had to do a lot of scrolling

to get through the whole... Well, your eye sight goes when it gets older, doesn't it? Well, it's because they push it so far away from their face. They've got to hold it in arm's length. If they can't see it, bring it closer. No, because they can't

because they haven't got their glasses for the short-sightedness. They've got to hold it and tilt their heads back a little bit. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's a good one. That's a good one. Use the index finger at a distance at an arm's length. Yeah, yeah. that's a good one. That's a good one. Use the index finger.

Yeah. At a distance, at an arm's length. Yeah, yeah. It's never occurred to them that they've got a thumb there that's literally like, we've evolved. Yeah. Do you reckon our thumbs are going to get longer as we evolve to like stretch over?

If they kept making phones bigger, it probably would have, but phones have kind of come back a little bit in size. Oh, yeah. They keep making pluses. Probably flatter. Yeah. I just got lost a bit there thinking about the evolution of thumbs. Number four on the list of the top six things Winston's changed in Jacinda's office.

He's got one of those gel wrist rests that go in front of the keyboard to stop you getting carpal tunnel. I hate those. Yuck. Me too. Even mouse pads in general, they're just grimy, eh? They're dirty. The mouse pads used to come with a little gel thing on the thing for your wrist to sit on as well,

and you'd move that around. My problem was I'd get bored and I'd just be like squeezing it the whole time. Like a stress ball. It's like your computer got fake boobies. Oh my God. Number three on the list of the things Winston's done in Jacinda's office, he's installed a minibar. Of course he has.

And while there's a bit of scotch in there, it's mostly full of those probiotic yogurts that help old people go poo-poos. Yeah. Because they go two ways when they get older. Yeah. Irritable bowel where they poo everything. Yeah. Or they just get shut up shop.

Yeah. They need something to keep it moving. Regular. Regular. Fib just get shut up shop. Yeah. They need something to keep it moving. Regular. Fibre and those little probiotic... Yacolt. Yacolt. Yacolt. Yacolt.

Yacolt yogurts. Thanks for that visual, by the way, of Winston Peters on the toilet. Just be like, lovely. I've got to go. The time is now! Number two on the list of the things Winston's changed in Jacinda's office, he's retuned the television so that Prime is on one and one is on two.

But two isn't there and neither are three or anything else because they're all crap. They play nothing but crap. Their pornographic music videos and the ads are so loud, it's all crap at prime. They have their news at 5.30, so I can go to bed at 6. And the number one thing Winston's changed in Jacinda's office over her maternity leave is he's curried. He's curried.

No, no curry. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. He has covered the smoke alarm with a sanitary pad so he can smoke durries in her office. But he does open the window. Yes. So he can kick back and have a durry.

Do that thing smokers do, that thing's full and the rest of us blow the smoke out the window. We've all had a flatmate, the smoke's in their room and they're like, they'll never know. Blow it towards the window. We can still smell it. We they'll never know. Low towards the window, we can still smell it. We can still smell it. That's today's top six. You may have seen a video

over the weekend of a McDonald's worker in Las Vegas throwing down with a customer. This was so good. I mean, not a few McDonald's, but it was so great.

It was a hiding of epic proportions. Basically, there was a customer of epic proportions. Basically, there was a customer who was trying to sneak refills with a cup that she had acquired for water. Which is Nordade.

And so the girl was like, hey, that's not what that's for, and she ignored it, so she just switched the fountain off at the wall. So the customer who had paid nothing for the cup couldn't get any soda. I don't know if they've been drinking. Have they been drinking? I don't know.

You don't. No, it's Vegas, eh? Yeah. Maybe. Hard to tell. And that led to some insults. I believe there was a yo mama insult. Mama joke in there.

And then the customer threw the cup at the worker and the worker was like, well, I've had enough of this. Step around. And the worker would have been a foot taller. Oh, at least. At least a foot taller than this person. Grabs them and it's on. She body slammed her after the punches.

Flung her around and body slammed her into a table. Yeah, there was a few stills taken from the video and there's one part where during the scuffle she's thrown onto a table and this person's just like bent back over the edge of the table. It's like, oh my god. Like, back-breaking stuff. But the, so if you were being absolutely beaten

like that, you'd be like, okay, well I'm gonna stop now. But she comes back, she grabs a chair and it's like, girl, you're gonna keep coming back and you're gonna to keep getting beaten up. And one of the other McDonald's workers stops the fight, so stops her getting smashed, and then she has a go at her. She's like, oh, okay, I'll smack you too then. Gives her a couple of her best and really, really sends them home.

I like to think there was alcohol involved because then it would at least explain a little something. Well, maybe. No, because she was working at the time, so she wasn't drunk. No, the other one. Yeah, the other one. I mean, she could have been. Yeah. I, because she was working at the time, so she wasn't drunk. No, the other one. Yeah, the other one. I mean, she could have been. Yeah.

I just think she had attitude. But the latest... Although you could probably do a shift at McDonald's. A little tipsy, right? I mean, they wouldn't like it, but you could probably get away with it. I haven't seen them do a checkpoint behind the counter. No. I haven't seen them do a checkpoint.

The latest, she is suspended but has not lost her job. I don't really want her to lose her job. No, neither. I think she's a hero for the service industry. She's a hero of the people. Yeah. Because that person came with absolute attitude. Yeah.

And you think about how much people have to put up with in service industry jobs. You're dealing with this and you can't hit them. Well, no, that's just the general society. That's a rule of society more than just for the people in the retail industry. You can't even swear at them. I know. I'd be fired within the

first week. This is why I couldn't do a job like this because I would. I'd get angry at people. Oh, yeah, retails. It's a tough gig. I was wondering if anybody in New Zealand has ever thrown down with a customer. I mean, that might have been the high end of things. Actual fights or just lost it.

Well, let's say that would be the Everest of calls to receive this morning if anyone's actually had a physical altercation with a customer. I don't. But just losing it would be. People would lose it at customers all the time. Yeah. Oh, without a doubt.

I mean, you're not meant to, but you would, wouldn't you? Yeah. Because the customer's always right, but most of the time they're probably morons, so they're not. Customers are idiots. Yeah. Customers don't know what they want. You know you're a customer sometimes, eh?

Yeah. No, I'm an idiot too. I can be an idiot. An unbearable fool. I can be an idiot too. Sure. Yeah. All right, well, okay, so 0800-DARS-AT-M-9696.

When have you lost it at a customer? So maybe you screamed, you went off, you had a yelling match with a customer. Screw them out. I don't think anyone's body slammed a customer onto a table. You don't know till you ask. Hey, anything between that. They might not call and say,

but I can guarantee it's happening. It's New Zealand. Yeah, well, that's true. Someone definitely would have body slammed a customer. So give us a call, 0800-DARLES-AT-HEM-9696. Whenever you've gone off

and lost it at a customer. We're talking about when you've lost it at a customer. This comes off the back of the video out of the Las Vegas McDonald's where it just went down. It was a brutal fight too.

Do you know what I was half expecting? Someone's titty came out. Did it? Yeah, she's like trying to hold her camera. The singlet knows that I'm boop. Do you know what I was half expecting over the weekend for like World Wrestling

to sign her as like a special like one of her parents or Yeah, I don't know. I think that missed a trick there. The McDonald's worker looked really tall. Yeah, she did. But I don't know if it was because the little scrappy-do situation was really small

and that made her look bigger or she was just quite tall. But she like I wouldn't even pick a fight. No. No, that's the thing. But I mean, we're not looking for body slamming customers into tables because, you know, this is a rare once in a blood red moon occurrence. That could have been it actually.

It probably might have been. We're all very moody over the weekend apparently. There's no shortage of people who have gone physical. Are you kidding? No, not at all. Somebody said somebody was shoplifting in our shop. So I grabbed him, slammed him into the concrete, and he fought, and he was trying to reach around into his back.

But I just held him down. It was physical. In the end, somebody else came and helped me restrain him, rolled him over, and the thing he was reaching for around the back was a machete hidden down the back of his pants. So, thankfully, the scuffle never got to the bladed weapon department. But the thing is, you're not legally,

you're not allowed to do that to someone. What, machete them? No, like slam them to the ground and hold them. Are you even allowed to do that? I don't know. I mean, I'm not saying... I mean, I'm saying in that, you know,

situation, good on them. But, you know, legally, they're probably... You're not allowed to even touch them. No. But then would you want to because you don't know

what they've got hidden on their body? Well, now they've got a machete down their pants. Yeah. True, all right. Jordan, when did you lose it at a customer?

Morning. Morning. I'm a tyre fitter. Okay. And one of the guys coming in the tyre was really badly damaged and we're trying to explain it to him. Yeah. And he started having a crack at one of the ladies that work with us.

Okay. And so, you know, I walked out and I said, is this your roommate, mate? He's like, yep. I picked it up and threw it out on the road. Get in your car and get lost. And he was having a look at me like, oh, I want to have a crack butt.

You know, I'm 6'3", 120 kg. So no, it's going to. So he's not going to, yeah. He's like, right. Okay, see you later, mate. But obviously, you're not allowed to do that. You're not allowed to go off at the clients or the customers, but sometimes they just deserve it, don't they? Yeah.

Oh, he's being an idiot. You sound wildly disrespectful. Not always right. Thanks, you're cool, Jordan. Some other text messages in. We were waitressing at a wedding and my mum asked the bride what the hell her problem was. And then when we were walking back to the kitchen,

I called her a weird bitch with all her weird guests, and it all started going down. I feel like there's probably a better way to approach that than... Yeah. Your dream day's weird, you weird bitch. Steph, when did you lose it at a customer? Well, it was a really busy Christmas period at one of the retail giants,

and I was working on customer service, and I saw this lady walk out of the store with these two humongous bags full of clothes which she hadn't paid for. So I went out to the car park to apprehend her. And I yelled out, you know, as you do. And she turned around and was like, what the F? Yelling all this abuse at me. And so I ripped one of the bags out of her hand. And then she fully, like, smacked me over the head with the other bag that she had in her hand.

And then I had the other bag and it was pretty much like a full-on pillow fight with the bags pretty much peeling out the top of them as we were hurdling them to each other. Wow. And it was pretty much getting physical and then the security came out and took over. So it was a bit full on.

Wow. And did you get all the clothes back? We did, actually, which was cool. But when we took her red Joe, she'd actually gone on a full on shopping spree. Because the cops had found her later on that day, as security had told me. And she'd been on a shoplifting spree at all these other places. So they also got all those clothes as well. I can't believe she threw down when she got caught.

I know. I was just like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. I just had to drop the stuff and run. I know, but she turned around, obviously. She was a lot bigger than I was, and just turned around and fully smacked me with one of the bags that she had in her hands. And then I just was like, white bitch. I was back at her, and I was like, I'm not taking your crap.

No, you said it's a busy Christmas period too. And I'd imagine Christmas period in retail is just wildly stressful. It's horrendous. Honestly, I feel for anyone and kudos to everyone else that has had to do something like that. You've gone above and beyond the call of duty. Do they give out hero medals in the retail sector? They should.

It's the polar opposite. You kind of get in trouble. I'm like, hey, I'm doing my job. What if you got clocked? I just imagine swinging the bags, you know, those little dye packs that are like... Yeah. Get one of those in the eye.

That'd sure hurt. Yeah, definitely. All right, Steph, thanks for your call. Some other text messages. This is from a couple of fast food outlets. I went to a place to use the toilet, a fast food outlet. Yeah. Slightly intoxicated.

The manager told me to leave because I hadn't purchased anything. I ignored him, went and did my business, returned to the lobby to find the manager standing there blocking my way. And then he proceeded to ask me for one ounce. One ounce is just like one-on-one. For using the toilet. And just disrespecting him. Yeah. And he said,

meet me outside at 10am. That's when my midnight shift finishes. Are you kidding me? I was like, man, I'm really sorry if he's in the toilet, but I mean,

I know it's a rough night and stuff, but I'm not coming back at 10 o'clock in the morning to fight you. He wasn't there like throwing food on the floor or something,

was he? He was just using the toilet. He used the toilet. I don't know, we're only hearing one side of the story. True, yeah, yeah, true. There might have been some disrespect.

I was working at a fast food outlet and a customer got food, ate the lot, and then came up and complained that there wasn't enough tomato and I demand a refund. We said, oh, well, where is it? He said, I've eaten it all. We were like, well, you can't have a refund. You've eaten it all. You're supposed to bring these problems up before. Yeah.

He threw a tray over the counter. So the manager said, look, I'll sort this out for you. Went to the soft serve machine, made a big ice cream cone, came back to the thing and threw it in their face. Yeah. That's why I couldn't work in fast food. I would do that. I would be that person.

They deserve it. Try it right in their face. So there you go. It's definitely gone down in New Zealand as well. We have the winner of Survivor New Zealand in studio, Lisa Stranger. Good morning. Hello.

Congratulations. Congrats. Thank you. I was going to go straight to the money. Not asking you for any, but has it sunk in? Because it was live last night that you've won $250,000. It has not sunk in at all. I can't believe it.

I'm still just like, oh, wow, did that really happen? Yeah, it did. Have you spent it in your mind? No. Oh, no. I haven't thought about it. It seems like sort of like jinxing it, you know? Yeah, yeah. I'm just thinking, if anyone ever talks about it

I was just like, nah, nah, nah. You know, we'll just see. I don't know. Although I have promised my son I'm going to give him $200. How old is he? Eight. Oh, that is so much money. I still want me for an eight-year-old but obviously also doesn't understand percentages there.

It's a small percentage. Less than a one thousandth. Yeah. So it was filmed a while ago. So obviously you wrapped up filming months and months ago and then you had to wait until last night to find out. Yeah, yeah. So I got home sort of at the start of March. Yep.

And then ever since then, I've just been like second guessing and thinking about everything that people said. And yeah, it's been really stressful, really stressful time. And no one knows that you got to the end. And so it's the TV show starts and people are like, well, no matter what happens, like you gave it a good go. And stuff like that. I'm like, oh, thanks guys.

Yeah. And because I was so, I didn't want to like make a big deal, because I didn't want to give anything away. I think lots of times people thought I hadn't done well. Yeah. So like, how did it go? Tell me. I'm like, oh, well, so, I didn't want to like make a big deal, because I didn't want to give anything away, I think lots of times people thought I hadn't done well. Yeah. So like, how did it go? Tell me. I'm like, oh, well, like, I don't know. I can't really.

I tried. Yeah. Yeah, so I was getting like always like, you know, commiseratory, like hats on the back and is this the week you go home? Like, well, you have to watch and see, you know. So what was the hardest part of being on there? Because obviously you were on there right till the end. Yeah, the food.

Yeah. Like, I just got so hungry. And I'm still not 100% right on my food. What do you mean? Okay, so when I got back, like, for a month or so after I got back, if I was in a room and there was food, the whole time my eyes are just, like, going, like, you've got, like, you know, like, some food there. And I'm just like, is that food? Like, get that food.

Like, you need that food. Like, my brain's just like, you're going to starve. Like, eat it. And I'm just like, no brain. It's okay. We're in New Zealand. I can get food whenever I want. But nah, it doesn't think so.

We're not on Survivor anymore. So you were just still in survival mode. Yeah. If it's edible, eat it now, because who knows when we're going to eat again. Yeah, yeah. And it's such a hard message to get through to like the rest, you know, to like the rest of your body. Like, it's okay, calm down.

Like, it's all good now. And yeah, I was just like so weak and so hungry. It's an apple. Pupils have died. She wants that apple. And now he's got Amanda Wren. How hard is it though? Because I always watch and people

like they always say how they're hungry but is it really that bad? Like would you go days without food? You wouldn't go days without food but like you know at the start especially you'd have like maybe like I don't know two tablespoons of rice for a whole day. Oh gee I couldn't

do it. I get so hangry. Yeah you wouldn't last. You'd be like vote me off now. I'm just getting in that boat Oh, gee, I couldn't do it. I get so hangry. Yeah, you wouldn't last. You'd be like, vote me off now. Yeah. I'm just getting in that boat myself. But then I couldn't ration either because rice is like pasta. I always cook way too much. Yeah.

And then you're left with all the leftovers at the end. But if I was only two tablespoons, even that doesn't seem quite enough, does it? Yeah. It's like the rice politics, you know, like someone's like, I'll do the rice today. And they like put in too much. And you're like, oh, no. We're going to starve. But it's Survivor, so you can't's like, I'll do the rice today and they like put in too much and you're like, oh no,

we're going to starve but it's Survivor so you can't be like, what the heck are you doing? And you're just like, oh yeah, cool, no worries.

So that was your tactic to kind of play nice through the whole thing? Yeah, I think it's like everyone's tactic. Like you just can't piss people off

because you want them to vote for you and you don't want to get voted out so you're just really sitting on a lot of things you want to express, you know, a lot want to get voted out. So you're just really sitting on a lot of things you want to express. You know, a lot of stuff.

Pretty much anything anyone says. You would like to call an arsehole on the radio right now. No. No, I love everyone. Maybe Matt Chisholm. No, not really. Not really. I love him. So what now then? Are you going to go back to the day job? Yeah, yeah.

Back to the school, being a librarian, talking about, all the kids that want to talk about Survivor a lot. Hopefully I'll like segue that into like a discussion of like books they might want to read. Classic librarian. Or they'll come in there and be like, oh, I forgot my lunch money. Can I have some? Yeah, wait for that because that'll come, I'm sure.

Not from me though, I'm sure. Not from me, though. I'm not going to ask. You said you would ask. And you've also said you weren't going to ask about three times. It feels like the person is just about to ask. You don't need to ask me. Well, congratulations. You won Survivor New Zealand.

All the best for the future. That hasn't sunk in yet, has it? That hasn't at all. All right, congratulations. F-A-M. All the best for the future. That hasn't sunk in yet, has it? It hasn't at all. All right, congratulations. So, Bowdoin Barrett's fiance had a lady put something on Instagram about Bowdoin that has everyone talking. So he was making breakfast and he was making toast and it's the topping on toast that everyone's like, ah, what? What? He was putting on it marmite and honey. and he was making toast, and it's the topping on toast that everyone's like, ah, what? He was putting on it marmite and honey,

and she wrote, name a more disturbing combination for his breakfast. But I had this when I was little. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. I didn't like it, but I think I tried it a couple of times when I was a kid. I have no time. I wouldn't even try it. It's disgusting.

It's too much honey in that, and the spread of the marmite and be particular about how much and it has to go to the edges. Yeah, it's too much marmite for starters. No, it's too sporadic. I reckon he hasn't planned ahead and got a fresh loaf of bread. He looks like he's eating the two

end bits. Which is either you're a dad because when you're a dad you have to eat the end bits or you've not planned ahead and those are the two that are always left in the bag and you're like, oh, bloody hell. I've got to eat the end bits. Yeah. Yeah, you're right.

I love the crust. Also, he looks like he's got fancy honey. Did you see that? Where's the fancy honey? It's one of the little black pottles. Oh, yeah. It looks like it'll have a unique manuka factor. Like a UMEF.

It'll have a unique manuka factor. Yeah. Yeah, right. Honey. With his marmite. You can't like sully a fancy honey with marmite.

You're going to tell everyone else what you said about this. Megan. You said he had a manky tea towel. Megan said he had

a manky tea towel. You said Bowden Barrett has a manky tea towel. She sent me the link and she's like let's see if we can find the manky tea towel. I couldn't even find

the manky tea towel. It's like where's Wally hidden in the darkness. manky tea towel. I couldn't even find the manky tea towel. It's like, where's Wally hidden in the darkness? Red is an odd choice. It's hard to keep... Oh, we need some new tea towels. It's hard to get good tea towels. I know. And you want nice tea towels.

Oh, we've got some real horrid looking tea towels. That's a manky tea towel. I've got one with a big hole in it. Yeah, but it's hard because you buy new tea towels and they just move the water around. Yeah, it's too waxy. Don't you give them a crazy hot wash and then... Even then, you've got to wait till tea towels are like a month or two old. And then they get better.

They really start to soak up the water. Right, yeah. Maybe that's why he's got that towel, Megan. It's reached peak tea towel-ness. But I need to zoom out to make sure that that red fits the decor because it's a bold choice, you know?

Your tea towel's going to match your decor now. What? Yeah. No, but you get a multi-coloured pack, don't you?

It's any colour. Oh, yeah. I'm sorry, I didn't know tea towels had to match. Do they? Yeah. And also,

what are you paying for a tea towel? Tell me that. For a quality one? I saw a three-pack of tea towels. And it was like $20. And I was like, that $7 seems too much for a tea towel. Too much, yeah. This one was because I checked where it was made.

I thought, is this a locally made product? Because I pay that much for a locally made tea towel. And then I'd tell everybody how I only supported the New Zealand tea towel industry. I wasn't buying it. That's what you do when you buy a New Zealand made product. You make sure everybody tea towel industry. Okay, yeah. I wasn't buying it. That's what you do when you buy a New Zealand-made product. You make sure everybody knows about it. Yeah, yeah. But these were Bangladesh.

Now, I don't know. That's probably where my tea towels come from. Yeah, but that's too much to pay. That's what I was thinking. How much of this is getting back to the Bangladesh factory? I spent a lot of time just sitting in front of a three-bagger tea towels running through. Right.

As you've just heard, I kind of whittled it down to a whole bunch of problems. Right. But I didn't end up getting them. So you've still got holy tea towels. Overthought it. Yeah, holy tea towels or free tea towels. Every now and then you'll get some. Well, here at work we'll get a free tea towel or something.

Well, does he have a birthday coming up? Because I could send him a nice bag of tea towels. I might send him some jif too because that gastro crop could do with a wipe. You've got to be careful what else you put in your Instagram shot. I know. Yeah, yeah. I don't think she was thinking about that when she just took an innocent photo of his breakfast. And there's a pack of matcha powder.

Oh, yeah. He's going straight on the bench. Oh, my God. He's not using a plate. I didn't even think about that. Christ alive. No wonder the stainless steel benchtop's got so many scratch marks. I don't know if he bloody cuts things straight on the bench.

Ed, be getting a bloody telling off at my house. And how much InstaStory is she putting up in a day? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen. Is there a rule on that now? Well, I don't know. I don't know what content's going in there. Like, that's good. That's a good one.

Right, okay. That's divisive and, you know, topic talk inducing. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. The rest of it better not be FM. I had my birthday party on Saturday night. So I'll take you back there right now because we had a bit of drama happen. Half an hour before, so I was getting ready in the house.

Andrew was in another part of the house. Mr. Toy Boy. Mr. Toy Boy. Yeah. And so I was in the kitchen and that's when I heard what I would describe as like a boo. And the windows went you know when your windows like shudder? Yeah, shaky windows.

And I thought, you know when you slam a window and it kind of rattles the house and it kind of makes a doom sound. I was like, what are you doing? And that's when Mr. Toibu ran into the kitchen and was like, are you okay? And I was like, was that, that wasn't you. And so that's when I heard

some screams outside. And I was like, I'm making this out to be more than it is. So we went outside to make sure they were like happy screams. But they sounded quite terrified. So I took my heels off and I was ready to go save a life.

I literally took my heels off and I was like, I need to run down the neighbourhood neighbourhood and see if everyone's all right. But the screaming kind of subsided a wee bit. And we thought, okay, that was weird. Well, maybe we'll find out what that was. Put the heels back on. And then the sirens started coming. And first we were, like, imagining it.

There was one siren. There was two. And there was about three. And then we saw all the police cars drive past, hooning it with their lights on. Yeah. And I was like, okay, something is going down. And so I went on our community notice page,

which is what you should always do when something happens. That's what I do. If I hear a police siren or someone speeding or anything, I go on there and it's only a matter of time. Yeah. I would desperately, my party was like starting in 15 minutes. Well, you know no one comes like bang on when you say they're going to. I would have been there on time but

Sade was late. So I was like fighting the urge to go and look. And then a fire engine went past and I was like, this is too much. I need to go and see. Have a rubber neck. So as soon as my best friend Ellie turned up,

I was like, we have to go and peruse the situation because the community notice page was lit, but there was no, no one definitely knew what was happening. Just that there'd been a bang. There'd been like a big boom and then there was all these police cars and everything. And I was like, well, they're on the island.

It's definitely happening around us. So we went for a drive and that's when all these police cars and everything. And I was like, well, they're on the island. It's definitely happening around us. Yeah. So we went for a drive and that's when we saw the helicopter fly over. And I was like, this is so exciting. I drove around to the other side of the island, saw all the police cars, all the like fire engines and everything. We ended up parking in a ditch, nearly ditched her car and I fell down into a muddy creek. I was all dressed up too. The world's worst Batman and everything. We ended up parking in a ditch, nearly ditched her car, and I fell down into a muddy creek. I was all dressed up too.

The world's worst Batman and Robin. Yeah. I was all dressed up in my nice gears because I was about to have a party and fell down into a muddy ditch. But I ran over, and on our island, a boat had blown up.

It's been in the news. I just got a news alert before. What's the latest? Someone said that they were just giving their account of rescuing this man. Do they want to interview me? Well, you know you were down a muddy ditch, Megan. You didn't do any rescuing. I didn't see it happen.

I heard it happen. So, yeah, apparently a boat blew up. Yeah, and this man's saying boat in pieces after explosion, like a sonic boom, fell across the island. I felt it go right through me. It was intense. It was. His description was better than yours before. You were like, this was boom.

No, I was trying to do the sound effects. I was like, boom. Windows. How good was that? That was pretty good. Boom. It was burned all around the place. And he's not dead. He was rescued. He's got serious burns to his face and his hands. But the neighbours...

I reckon he would have burned, singed his eyebrows and the hair off his fingers. At the very least. It sounds pretty serious. You get a little close to the fire and then you're like... And you look down and all the little fingers, your little hand hairs are all gone. So when I got there, there was nothing left of the boat

had it already sunk. So the firefighters didn't have anything to do because it just sunk in the water. It's a good thing about a fire at sea. Just puts it south out. Water will put it south out eventually. And did they have to helicopter him? Yeah. So I thought it was a police helicopter, but it was a rescue helicopter.

It was dark. Did they pluck him out of the ocean? Or did somebody else go out there and pluck him out of the ocean? So the neighbors jumped in the water. They were like me, took their heels off. Oh, too cold. I would have been of the ocean? So the neighbours jumped in the water. They were like me, took their heels off. Oh, too cold. I would have been like, you there? The neighbours jumped in the water and pulled them out of the water.

But also the neighbours' windows blew out. Jeez. Do you know how I know all of this? Because I was standing there muddy with my flash gears, standing next to some older woman who had a police scanner. What? Right in front of the fireman

and the police. But I thought they use digital radios now. I don't know. She had a little thing and every time the police or the fireman

spoke into their walkie talkie she put it up to her ear and she was like it's blown out their windows. She had all of the goss. Wow. She stole that from a police officer.

If she's got digital technology, she's selling that. And she had one of those big mag lights and like a wacky bat as well. I'm sure there's a good name for a wacky bat. She would definitely throw down. No wonder they want you for the community patrols. Yeah. Community watch patrols. They know what's going on.

Yeah, 100%. I think your neighborhood watch in your neck of the woods needs to be stepped up. I think it's time you got back in touch with Marge. Yeah. Who asked you to do a stint. Yeah. And say, you know, we've experienced. We need a boat now.

We need to get mobile outside, do boat patrols. You know, you should tell people that it's, you know, go in there now and just plant the seed of maybe it was terrorism. That's how to get stuff happening. That's how to, you know, get laws a bit loose So you can go a bit vigilante I'm scared they'd run with it Scare people in their homes They might, alright As a parent and having dealt with this on occasion

I was very interested to see that there's been a new study From the University of Michigan About how you get fussy eaters to eat Just your kids And it actually raises some really, really good points. And I feel really bad now. Okay. Being that I was never forced

to eat as a kid because I'd eat everything and anything. And if it had sauce on it, if I didn't like it, I'd just put sauce on it. As much as I can remember, there was never a problem getting me to eat anything. And to be honest, my mum's tastes are particularly bland when it comes to food. So whenever trying it, she hates Brussels sprouts and leeks and everything kids hate.

I'd always have trouble eating my veggies because mum would boil them until, I can say this because she's about to land in the country, but she won't hear this, but she boiled all nutrients and life out of every vegetable. It was never a light steaming. No. If there was any crunch left to a vegetable, it was undercooked. And they had to go back in the boil for another 10 minutes just to be safe. But this study looks into how you should force your kids to eat.

And if it actually makes them less picky in the future. And it doesn't. They followed these toddlers for a year and found that the group that they got to put pressure on these kids to eat actually at the end of it were still picky eaters. Right. And they said it's important that kids do eat vegetables and stuff otherwise you're going to – for health.

Yeah. You've got to get a range of foods into them. But they said the parents that really forced their kids didn't benefit. The kids were no less picky at the end of things. And they said the better way around it is to actually find things that they do like and stick to that because you want your kid to eat rather than. Like happy meals. Yeah, but.

No, no, no, no, no, no, like healthy stuff. Right. They talked to a kid about what they can remember about the food of the last year. Yeah, but... No, no, no, no, no. Like healthy stuff. Right. They talked to a kid about what they can remember about the food of the last year. Yeah. And they said, when my mum stopped forcing me to eat peas and made me carrots instead because I like carrots.

Right. So they said, just give them carrots. Because the arguments people... God, I had to eat. How's this? The arguments people have with kids about forcing them to eat are some of people's earliest memories.

Yeah, that would be my sitting at the dinner table gagging on broccoli and dad saying, you are literally not leaving. I would sit there for hours. And your first, so that's what he's saying. It's quite dangerous that your child's first memory of their interaction with you is you screaming at them and like holding their

mouth shut. Yeah. My mouth never got held shut. I've held a mouth shut. I'm not proud of that. I'm not proud of that. I'm not proud of it. But man, Indy was so fussy when she was younger. And she was a bit like, I don't like the taste of it. I'd be like, but you haven't even tasted it. Right. And I'd say like,

put it in your mouth. And she'd go and just spit it out straight away. So I was like, put it in. And then when she put it in, I just went and I was like, see, don't panic. Don't panic. Don't panic, but I'm holding your mouth shut. There's no need to panic.

Taste it. See, you can taste it. I think that's what they tried to get banned at Guantanamo Bay. It's waterboarding, but with chicken. And peas. See, taste it. Is it taste okay? It's not let go.

That's why I can't do peas now. Because I just always remember being made to sit at the table and I wasn't allowed to eat until the peas were in me. And quite often I would shovel them out the window. Shelve them. Your mum comes back in, she's like, well done on eating all your peas. And you're like,

eat them. I'm pretty sure you only stipulated they needed to be in me. No, excuse me. It's very hard to shelve a mushroom pea. Nutritionally. Oh, you've got to really push them in. One by one would be my recommendation. But nutritionally, don't you absorb quite quickly?

That's why you do shelve pills. It gets into the system really quick. Look, they went out the window. I'd be there so long, my parents would move into the lounge. Oh, why you do shelf pills. It gets into the system really quick. Look, they went out the window. I'd be there so long my parents would move into the lounge. I don't leave you there. Oh yeah,

they're watching TV. There was a getaway time where you could be like, yum, I'm finished. But they were just out the window. But I was really fussy

when I was little and I eat like all veggies now. I'm picky with meat but I eat like all veggies. So I don't know if that like helped. Well, I think maybe you came about it in your own time away,

but they said these toddlers we spoke, yeah, they're being really pushy with food. Did not change how picky they were by the end of that year. If anything, it psychologically damaged them. Remember that, Bourne? I don't hold mouths shut anymore. You've moved on. Sometimes I don't hold my mouth shut anymore You've moved on Sometimes I have to hold my own mouth shut

So I don't eat everybody else's But we'd love to know this morning How your parents got you to eat food And what did they have to get you to eat And what was their technique Maybe there was some bribery Like we quite often got You won't get like dessert

Or ice cream If you don't eat all your peas I've been told that's really bad too. The doctor said to me, oh, you don't want to make food the reward, like ice cream, because then they'll always expect ice cream. Oh my God, no, because I do that now. I'm like, if I do this, I'll get ice cream later. But as you're an adult, you're like, okay,

if I go to the gym today, I'm allowed three magnums. Yeah, you're right. It's not good, is it? I'm doing all the work I do at the gym. You just reward yourself with food. It's not a great relationship to have with treats. So growing up, how did your parents get you to eat food? Maybe you had to stay at the table.

I don't know. Maybe they used some torture technique on you. A friend of mine wouldn't eat, wouldn't eat. Just feel like pick at the bits. Maybe eat the potato. And I remember once he said his dad worded it all up in a blender and just poured it in his gob. Like, head back.

Oh my god. Liquid diet. Okay, 0800 dials at M9696. How did your parents get you to eat food when you were younger? Give us a call. We've been reading a study from the University of Michigan this morning saying that there's a lot

of bad outcomes to forcing your children to eat things they don't necessarily want to eat. How you handle it, it can be damaging to the relationship. And so many people's earliest memories of their parents aren't happy ones. It's their parents screaming at them about not eating all the food on their plate.

So we are asking this morning, how did your parents get you to eat food? Because we've all been there, haven't we? We've all been there. Somebody said, and it's a classic, the old sticker chart. They had a sticker chart. They said they never got to the end. That's a good thing about being a parent. You'll often put a

sticker chart up there knowing they're never going to get to the end because when there's a slip up you take a sticker off. Unachievable goal. The parents are against me from the start. It's 100% achievable. Eat what's on your damn plate every night. Get it eaten. Somebody else said my mum used to have a wooden spoon next to the plate as a street to eat fast.

You can't actually get corporal punishment. One night she whacked the middle of the table when we were mucking around and not eating and it broke. Wow, that shock value did the trick. We ate it super quick that night. It takes, of course, Natalie, how did your parents get you to eat food? Oh, well, I grew up on a pig farm and my dad was a bit of a beast

and he has the threat of me and my older sister and younger brother that if we didn't eat what was on our plate, he'd give us a pig injection because we knew, being on the farm, that the pigs needed this injection because they didn't eat fruit and vegetables mainly. And one day me and my sister

would have been about seven and eight and we were beating little tarts, I guess, and seeing what would happen. And he stood up furious with us and got the needle out for the injection and pulled it up in front of us and put it on the plate. And we soon ate what was on the plate.

To this day, we don't actually know if he would have given it to us. We swear he would have. Oh, my God. You know him best. He's your old man. Ruthless. Ruthless. My mum said she would have not let him, but I don't really believe her.

But it worked. So is that one of your earliest memories? Well, for food. The threatening went on for a few years before we actually tried him. And then he got the needle out. And then he got the needle out and filled it up. And that stuck with you to this day, though, that

emotional kind of torture? Oh, he was alright. He used to always do weird stuff like that. But see, isn't that a weird thing, yeah? Yeah, ate your vegetables. He would have been removed if he did what he does now. Sure, you ate your veggies though. Thanks, you're cool.

Natalie Thomas, how did your parents get you to eat food? Casserole was always an issue, hey. But mum got so sick of it at one point, she just used to chuck it in the food processor and then put it on top of two minute noodles. I hated stew and casserole. Why? I loved it. Oh yeah, I was okay with that.

It was like gravy. The bad outcome of it is now I'm 19 and I refuse to eat casserole so I still mash it up and put it on noodles. No, because I've never made a stew ever since I've left home. Haven't you? What are you putting your slow cooker in? Oh, I love stews. I mean, I guess that kind of is a casserole stew, but nah, it's

different. It's different. I'm with Thomas. I can't do it. Yuck. Just avoid it. Yeah. We had at least once or twice a week. God, we're ungrateful. We're being fed. We're talking about the 80s and early 90s when we were kids. Do you think it was a culinary bland

spot for the middle class? Because it was the first time that parents had been time poor? Maybe. Prior to that, the generation before that, our parents growing up, mum would have probably been at home. Because she wasn't allowed to go to work. No. With the men.

But were herbs and spices expensive? Like, we could have eaten it if it tasted better. They didn't have My Kitchen rules. Yeah, right. They didn't have, you know, MasterChef. They had Alison Holst and an Edmonds cookbook, my friend. True. We deserved better.

True. Matt, when were you forced to eat food? What did your parents do? Well, it wasn't actually my parents. I thought of a fussy kid as well, and I went to a friend's house. Yeah. And they dished up this massive plate of pumpkin and I said, oh, when I

sat down, I said, oh, I don't eat pumpkin. I've never tried it before or anything like that, but I just said, I don't eat pumpkin. I don't like it. And the mother said, oh, we try everything on our plate in this house. And I was like, oh, okay. So I took a bite and proceeded to vom all over the kitchen table and then went into an anaphylactic shop

and almost died. So maybe that's why you don't eat pumpkin. Yeah, yeah, I pass on that one. Are you allergic to pumpkin? I was. I've grown out of it now. But, yeah, like all my throat closed up and I had to call an ambulance and all sorts of stuff.

Did she feel bad? Did she apologise? Yeah, but the next day my friend said at school, she was like, thanks so much. I never have to eat pumpkin again. Well, once you've seen her vomiting all over the family dinner, it'll certainly put you off old pumpkin. Thanks for your call, Matt.

I just Googled, there's lots of people allergic to pumpkin. Apparently the seeds of pumpkin or the papita. Papita. A lot of people have like severe allergies to those. Huh, okay. Some text messages in. My sister wouldn't eat crusts. Now, mum didn't have a problem with it,

but my grandmother used to infuriate her so much that once she wasn't allowed to eat anything apart from crusts. So for lunch, dinner and breakfast, all she would serve were crusts. She would cut the crusts off other people's sandwiches and put it in my sister's lunchbox so that she would only be able to eat crusts. But why does it matter?

Like, crusts aren't nutritious anyway. No, it's just like literally the most burnt part of the bread, right? Somebody else said, My mum had to turn our dinner plates into pieces of art to get us to eat them. Smiley faces. Animals. Oh, animals. Oh, yep.

Like when you go to a Thai restaurant and they make a flour out of a carrot. And you're like, how do they do that? I don't know if mum was rocking that sort of culinary art. More just like a smiley face with two cucumbers and a sausage. Yeah. Eat the face. By the way, the two cucumbers and the sausage, eyes and a mouth, not a penis and balls. Just to clarify.

I don't know anybody's mum's dishing them up. I didn't even think that. I didn't think that. Okay, good. No, I'm glad I didn't say it live on air then. My sister used to and still does hate peas and dad would make her have a pea for every year old she was. And when she was six, she had to have six peas.

Oh, God. She used to take them individually and put one in her mouth and swallow it with a drink of water like it was a pill. And she was like, she'd get excited about her birthday, but Dad would bring her back down to earth by just reminding her that that meant one more pea per meal. I love peas. What's wrong with peas?

They're the best. My dad had an interesting tactic. He hated how much tomato sauce I'd put on my food. Oh, me too. My dad would always say, do you need all that? He's like, oh no, technically I don't need it all. The sauce debacle in our house, you've got to try it before you put

sauce on it. I'd be like, trust me, I know. I know this will be bland. The steak will be nigh on leather. I know it needs sauce. I might, but I know these things. So one day, when I sat down and I put my sauce on without trying anything, he came in with a whole can of tomato sauce open and just poured it over the meal and said, eat it.

If you love sauce so much, eat it. So I did. Probably backfired in his face. God, I torture all of these. I know. That's like hearing these and reading that report actually seriously makes you think how sad it is. People's earliest memories of their parents

screaming at them. AIDA! AIDA! ZM. ZM. Fleets for the Megan. It's time for... Oh, hold on. No, no. No, no. You usually do a little bit of a thing beforehand. I'm still getting my food. We'll all just wait for you to gargle your food down.

Yep. Are you good? I think so. Or, of course, really, it must be time for... Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. Today's Fact of the Day is about Pakistan. Okay. It's a stan.

It's one of the stans. Yep. I've just watched the episode of David Barry's Dark Tourist where he goes to the stans. Turkmenistan. Yeah. Kazakhstan. Kazakhstan. Afghanistan.

Afghanistan. Yeah. I've finished that season at the weekend, Kazakhstan. Kazakhstan. Kazakhstan is massive. Yeah. I finished that season at the weekend, Dark Tourist. Very good. So interesting. It was very good. Turkmenistan. That was the stan that blew my mind.

I didn't know a lot about that stan. The scary stan? Yeah. Tajikstan, Uzbekistan. So the stan in all those words means home, land of, or place, effectively. Oh, okay. So it's all to do with the people of the region. One that isn't, though, is Pakistan.

Okay. I didn't know this, but Pakistan is an acronym. Is that today's fact of the day? Today's fact of the day is Pakistan is an acronym. It's named after the areas. Punjab is the P. Afghan is the A. The tribe and people, not the biscuit.

Yep. God, I love the biscuit. Kashmir. Except when they put the nut on the top. No, you've got to have it. That's the only time I like a walnut. It's adorning an Afghan. No, no, no, no, no.

Half a walnut. Just put a chocolate icing. You don't need the walnut. Half a walnut. Just put a chocolate icing. You don't need the walnut. Half a walnut. You do. Like flat side down, eh? Uh-huh. I saw one at the weekend and I took issue with this.

I said to them, you've got the walnut upside down on that Afghan. What, it was pointing up? It was the flat side was up. Like the curved underbelly of the walnut was down. And I said, you've got the walnut upside down on that. Because I was like, I'll have one of those. And they went to get it. I was like, ah, not that one.

The walnut's upside down. What are you? I don't want that. It's an animal, an absolute monster. It's also the smallest. Yeah. And I like to tell them which one I want because I want the biggest. I know.

Vaughan, the other day we were getting a bakery treat from the cafe over the road. And Vaughan specified which slice I would like. The one with the most ice. You must hate people like you. You know, you said, oh, well, that slice. And I said, he wants the front one because it's thicker and it's got more icing on it. And the guy was like, oh, fair enough. Cool, you're paying the same.

Yeah, yeah. You want more for the same amount of money. Anyway, that's just basic economics. What does Pakistan mean? So the A is for Afghan. The K is for Kashmir. Yeah, like the sweater. Like the sweater. Like the sweater.

The Kardashians made. It comes from the goat. And the goat is native to the region. But why is it K? Kashmir. Isn't that start with a C? No, the region. That's Kashmir.

Oh, okay. Is K. In this, and Sindh, and the tan on the end is for Balochistan. So it gets it from that name rather than being place of. Right. So Pakistan is actually an acronym. It's an acronym. Huh.

Never knew that. Pakistan hasn't even existed for that long. It was like, basically, Pakistan and India were like, imagine you and your brother are squabbling and your parents say, go to your room, you go to that room, you go to that room. And they built a wall down the middle. Right. That's basically what happened there. Okay.

You go to that side. It's fighting, are you? Well, you go to that side and you go to that side. We'll put a line down the middle. Huh. Okay. You're on that side, you're on that side. So that's how that works.

You should teach history. This is so much easier. Yeah, just put it into... I'm a cool teacher, guys. Hey, guys, don't call me Mr. Smith. Call me Vaughn. Yeah. And today I'm dressed as Sir Upper Run and Arter,

but I'm on a skateboard because I'm trying to make it relatable to you guys. You know who else would have loved rap music? Sir Edmund Hillary. So I've written a rap about climbing Everest. He didn't like rap music? Sir Edmund Hillary. So I've written a rap about climbing Everest. He didn't like rap music. No, he didn't. Probably thought it was rubbish.

Noise, I can't even understand what they're saying. I mean, I don't want to speak on behalf of Sir Ed, but it's a fair assumption. So today's fact of the day is Pakistan is an acronym. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull at the weekend was in Hobart. Taz, that's Tazzy, isn't it? Yeah.

Taz is the bottom bit. Never been. No, I've had friends that. Taz is the bottom bit. Yeah, never been. No, I've had friends that have gone, it looks real beautiful. Yeah. Real Australian, though. Yeah, real Australian. I've got a feeling Tasmania is like concentrated Australian. Right, and lots of things that'll kill you down there. Like they've boiled off all the

water and it's just concentrated Australian. Yeah. Well, the Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull stopped into a cafeteria, a cafe, for a little bite to eat. Yeah. And on his... I love how politicians do this to try to make themselves look like everyday folk. Yeah. It's guaranteed in a run-through election, someone will

have a sausage roll. Yeah. In New Zealand. Yeah. And you can imagine... They'll get a picture of them getting a sausage roll. Behind the scenes, he's like, oh God, do we have to stop here? And they're like, yes. Do I have to eat at all? It's where the people are. And he's like, ugh, okay. People are as disgusting as this pie I'm about to eat. scenes, he's like, oh, God, do we have to stop here? And they're like, yes. Do I have to eat it all? It's where the people are. And he's like, ugh, okay. People are as disgusting as this pie I'm about to eat. Well, he tucked into a delicious-looking pie on his Instagram story at the weekend.

I'm guessing taken by one of his helpers. Right. And that is when the problem started because, Vaughn, if I show you this photo. What does that say? And continue to make, oh, so it's got the bakery and continues to make excellent pies is the caption. Oh, he's eating it with a knife and a fork. This is where the, yeah, the issue started. The Prime Minister of Australia eating

a pie on a plate with a knife and fork. And no, not an ounce of sauce. Nope. At a cafe if you're going to get a pie, you've got to get one of them little squeezy sauce things that you... Yeah. Rip in half. It's like, even pizza, I don't like knife and forking a pizza. No, God no.

You've got to pick it up even if you're in a restaurant. No, it's a fancy pizza. You eat it with a knife and fork. No, you don't. No, you don't. You're allowed to eat that with your hands. I've never felt the need to eat a pizza with a knife and fork. Oh, I often do.

Oh, simply I shan't. But I used to eat a pie with a spoon because you rip the top off and then you eat the mince with the spoon. Yeah, but then do you eat the pastry? Yeah. Oh, okay. That's all right then. Just like to segregate the parts.

If you were having it as like a family, we used to have pies every now and then for dinner growing up. You'd take the pie off the top and you'd eat all the meat out and you'd refill it

with the veggies. Yeah, right. And then you'd be like, oh, I'll just disguise those and it's like I'm eating more pie. But you're not. But it's just vegetables. It's just vegetables.

But I wouldn't eat a vegetable pie. Crikey. But yeah, so people have kind of laid into him on social media. For eating with an over the fork? Fair enough. What's going on here? Yeah, he should have gone hands for that. If you're trying to look like the everyman, just like tuck into it.

Is it a germ thing though? Because he might have been out shaking people's hands, not had a chance to sanitise. Wash his hands. He's at a cafe. Wash your hands. I was going to the toilet, I washed my hands. I have a friend that sanitise. Wash his hands. He's at a cafe. Wash your hands. I go into the toilet and wash my hands.

I have a friend that eats, like, can't eat burgers without the wrapper or the box and even will eat chips with the wrapper. Like, just a germ, a germaphobe.

That's weird. Just wash your hands. Make a makeshift glove out of the burger wrapper to eat the fries with. Yeah. I don't know what they do if they get one in a box.

Haven't seen that. Weird though, eh? I guess they probably ripped the box. So you've never seen them eat anything with their hands? Like straight? Well, not on just that occasion.

I just thought it was weird. I'm a big fan of washing my hands, but at the same time, you've got to get a bit, don't you? Bit of germs. A few germs to build up the bacteria.

Build up the immunity. Yeah. Keep the body on its toes. FEM. You know, a lot of bad news for dolphins around. Yep. You know, mining and the seabed mining in the area of the Maui dolphin.

Yep. Have they got any more of those yet? Because the big 55, eh? Like the final 55 or the last 55. Yeah. They had a website and everything. So it was almost like you pay for the website. You don't want them to go up too quickly because the web address you paid $40 a year for has become redundant.

I still think they're battling with numbers. Yeah, battling with numbers. Beautiful little one of our own dolphins. Well, maybe the dolphins, the Maui dolphin, they're to follow the lead of their Hawaiian cousins. The melon-headed dolphin, named thus because his head looks a little bit melon-y. It's a bit mean. It's a bit mean. I would have named it after something else.

And the rough-toothed dolphin. Yeah, it was hard to say. They are two distinctly different types of dolphin. Okay. But it's believed that they gut it down because people in Hawaii, off the coast of Hawaii,

have seen this dolphin. They're like, hmm, that looks like a melon-headed dolphin, but it's got rough teeth of the rough-toothed dolphin. Okay. Why is that so hard?

Is it because it's got rough-toothed? Rough-toothed. Dolph. Okay. It's got the dolphin. The f-f-f-f. Right. The f-f-f-f. Throughout there. Tooth. Dolph. Okay. It's got the Dolph. The fuh. Right.

The fuh. Throughout there. So they're saying this is the first case in a while of these dolphins who have shared the water for a long time. Into breeding. Into breeding. Okay. Yeah. I mean, to you and I, we probably wouldn't even know. We'd be like, oh, a dolphin of some variety.

Yeah, right. But for those in the know, they're saying that these two are getting it on. Okay. And they want to get biopsies of these and see if they're like, you know, a new species. Because a lot of species, when they intermingle, they can't then give birth again. Like the liger.

Yeah. The lion and the tiger. There have been cases where a liger's been born, but it's been unable to go again. Right. It's been unable to breed. It's been born infertile. Yeah, right.

So, yeah, they want to do some studies. So, I don't know. The Maui dolphin, could it have a go with the standard whale? Standard. Ooh. It's biting off. You'd want the humpback whale to be the mother. You wouldn't want to be a Maui dolphin trying to squeeze out a humpback whale's baby.

No. Occasionally you'll see a comically mismatched couple. Yeah. And she's much smaller than him and you're like. Ow. Ow. I'm being honest. Good luck.

Ouch. Yeah. For all of that. Yeah. This situation. See, there's a new species of dolphin. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Megan. The podcast. For See, there's a new species of dolphin.