ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - June 08 2018

Episode Date: June 7, 2018

Prime Minister - Jacinda Adern is on the phone, Friday Flashback and how over the top was someones birthday over the top?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletchford and Megan podcast, thanks to Sparks. Shoot incredible videos in super slow-mo with the Samsung Galaxy S9. 10 out of 10. Hey, just before we get the podcast underway, podcast listeners, just a reminder, we'll be away for the next couple of weeks. So there won't be any more podcasts. Yeah. For two weeks.

But then we'll be back, and the podcast will be back. But in the meantime, don't listen to anyone else maybe just do five minutes a day for the next two weeks of this podcast yeah just if you need to stretch it or listen like stopping midstream yeah but quite hard what if they like listen to a new one and then decide that they don't want to listen to ours anymore don't try anything new they'll be because we do that thing hey with the balls do that thing with the balls. Fingers. The thing with the balls. You know, keeps them coming back every day.

Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show. Fleets, Warner, Megan, Fry. Yay. Yay. We're not all on board with that one. Oh, no, no, no. I just wanted to leave you hanging. Yeah, okay.

Because it felt awkward. Yeah, you went into it full steam. Yeah, well, I'm having fun. It was like we ran up to the side of the pool and you jumped in, but we were like, oh, no. Like, how cold was it? It's warm. It's warm, guys.

No, back inside. We're not jumping into the fry-yay pool. Double fry-yay, though, because we're on holiday for two weeks after today so stick that in your pipe and smug it. Everybody. No wait. Don't. Wait. No. No. Stay. Where are you going?

No. I've got the hiccups too. What a bad start to the show. It's because you got all excited about Fri-Yay. I did. I got excited. Didn't scare the man out of you? What was that trick Al did? Al who works here had... Ring, ring.

Ring, ring. Answer the phone. Oh, hello. And then what comes after that? Over something like, did you get a pineapple? What? Did you get the pineapple? What pineapple?

Is that the pineapple speaking? No. Are you a pineapple? No. What are you doing? Did you get the pineapple? Is this part of the thing? Yeah. No. What are you doing? Did you get the pineapple? Is this part of the thing? Yeah.

No. What are you trying to confuse me so I forget about my hiccups? Are they gone? I think they might have. It's insane. Only works once. Yeah, because next time you know what we're doing. Are they gone?

I think so. It worked for me too, but only once. It only worked once. It worked on my kids. It worked on my wife. Like everybody. But I can't remember. I think that's it.

It's just to confuse your brain. Right. Okay. So just say anything to confuse your brain. It's like a hard reset. Pineapple based all the time for me. Oh, right. Okay.

I don't know why. I think mine was banana based when he did it. Oh, okay. Just to a fruit at the supermarket. Just some sort of kooky fruit. Yeah, I think they're gone. Wow. Okay, that's weirding me out.

I know. It's crazy, eh? Okay. It's like we just re-control, alt-delete your brain. So today, Friday flashback, your pick, Vaughn. That's coming up at eight.

And I am unapologetically going for a hardcore full noise banger. We have some guests on the show today. Let me tell you. A little prime minister of a little country In the South Pacific that you might have heard of Called New Zealand The Prime Minister of New Zealand is on the show

And only days away from Having a baby Her due date 10 days away That'd be great if she went into labour While she's on the phone, on the show. I would deliver the baby. It seems only right I would deliver the baby.

She doesn't want you ferreting around in there. I don't ferret. Nobody wants you ferreting around down there, Vaughan. I am a professional. She's not coming in. It's on the phone. Yeah, I've seen it done twice. One the traditional way, one a caesarian, so get me a butter knife

from the kitchen. I can do either. Right. I've got a couple of the All Blacks joining us as well ahead of the first test against France. Yeah, who knew that was happening? Eden Parkey. It's happening on Saturday. Not me. Seems very early. Is it though? Because we're in June now and it feels late. I suppose it's not.

8th of June. And Matildas, friend of the show, Matoodle Rice, in to talk about her new show, which starts next week on Monday. Heartbreak Island is coming to TV2. But there's this, like, three nights a week thing happening at 7.30, and you're like, hmm, how risque can it get at 7.30? And then 9.30 on a Friday, uncut. Yeah, uncut.

Boobies, bums, balls, the lot, all the bees. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. I've found three news headlines are for three news stories. Vaughan and Megan, your job is to pick one of the headlines. Headline one, Nazis' nudie walk of shame. Okay. Headline two, ketchup greater than the knife.

And headline three, dog meets his match. A go. I know the first one. Oh, good. A far-right German politician was swimming, and someone stole his clothes, and as they were running away, he yelled out, this is no swimming place for Nazis.

Yes. Yes. Good. But he wasn't skinny dipping. I assume he had his togs on under his clothes. No, apparently he was skinny dipping. Really? A nerdy Nazi. A nerdy Nazi likes to skinny dip.

So. What was the knife one? Ketchup, greater than the knife. Or dog meets his match. You know I want the doggy one or dog meets his match? You know I want the doggy one. Dog meets his match. I'll go for the doggy one. Have we locked in the doggy one?

Okay, we can do that. We go to Goat Island Lodge, south of Darwin, in the middle of the crocodile-infested Adelaide River. Now, Pippa... Oh, no, I know this story. Can I go back? Can I go back? I was going to say, we locked it in. I was going to say, I've got a feeling it's not good. No, we locked it in. Pippa... Oh, no, I know this story. Can I go back? Can I go back? I was going to say, we locked it in.

I was going to say, I've got a feeling it's not good. No, we locked it in. Pippa... I saw this. Pippa would actually be quite entertaining for the guests that stayed at this lodge because Pippa would quite often run around and tease the crocodiles in the river. Taunt them. Taunt them.

Fifteen years, Pippa has lived on the little island. And tease the crocodiles in the river. Taunt them. Taunt them. 15 years. Pippa has lived on the little island, so quite an old dog. Well, Pippa, who became known for chasing crocodiles. Did we get Pippa's breed? More than 100 times away. There's a photo. It looks like a little yappy, one of your stupid little dogs, Megan. What would that be?

I can't even sense it. It's absolutely nothing like my dog. Oh, it's what's got four legs. I don't know. Well, fair. That's everybody's dog then, apart from the amputee dogs. I can't see in the story what kind of dog it is. Anyway, well, he taunted one too many crocodiles

because Pippa, RIP, got snaffled up by a croc. Oh, no. But then at the age of, what, 15? Yeah. That's a good innings. You should retire from taunting animals that have literally spent millions of years

at the top of that local food chain. Yeah. And, you know, developed into the natural environment's apex predator. Also, you're in their habitat as well. Oh, yeah. So, you know. And, yeah, I think the owners said something like, um, yeah, it was kind of about time that happened.

Yeah. Or no surprise. It's been a long time coming. Yeah. Oh, well. It was a terrier. A little terrier, yeah. It would have been yappy.

A little yappy terrier. Let's face it, the crocodile did us all a favour. If I went to that lodge... The owner said, look, a little terrier shouldn't be doing things like that, but should I stop her? I don't know. She got away with it for 10 years. So the owner's a bit like, well, she had a good run.

Yeah. But the owner's sick of it. That's true, though. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She did have a good run. Apparently there is a video of it. That's true, though. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Should it have a good run? Apparently there is a video of it.

Oh. Oh, really? Because, you know, this was a bit of a tourist attraction for people that stayed at the lodge. No, that's horrific. I don't know if it's online. A grim, dark part of me wants to see that. Oh. No.

Just a little bit of it, not the whole. No, because it's like when you're watching one of those blue planets or one of those David Attenborough things. You always want them to get away. You want them to get away, but at the same time, it because it's like when you're watching one of those blue planets or one of those David Attenborough things. You always want them to get away. You want them to get away, but at the same time, it's nature, isn't it? Remember the seal on the little bit of ice

with the killer whale? And then it just slid down. And that was the end of that one. Oh, that was just heartbreaking. But then we had that heroic iguana that ran across the beach and got away from all those snakes. And you're like, oh, no, he's buggered, mate.

He's buggered. But he got away. And then he got away. What a hero. Nature. F like, oh, no, he's buggered, mate. He's buggered. And then he got away. What a hero. Nature. FM. There's a website that's been doing research on this one topic since 2011.

And they have been asking people whether they think pornography is morally acceptable. Now, since 2011, right up to like last year, it's been around 30%. Okay. It's been around what percent? 30%. Like it started in 2011, 30% thought that it was morally acceptable to watch pornography.

Oh, okay. Right. So 30% say thumbs up. Yeah. Went to 31 for a few years, 33, up to 34 for a couple of years. Last year it was 36%. Then it's hiked up to 43% in 2018. That's a huge bump.

What happened? Trump. Because he slept with that porn star. I don't know. Maybe. Well, maybe people just think it's just possible to do anything these days. Yeah, we're watching the world get screwed on the news every day, so seeing someone get screwed isn't actually... No. Yeah, that is watching the world get screwed on the news every day. So seeing someone get screwed isn't actually... No.

Yeah, that is a massive jump though considering it's been around 30% for years and now this is America too, specifically. Right. 43% of Americans think it's okay. Also, this is another one of those surveys that just feels like a trap. I know.

Yeah, like asking guys in front of their wives and they're like, oh, absolutely, no, yuck a trap. I know. Yeah, like asking guys in front of their wives and they're like, oh, absolutely irreparable. No, yeah. They were asking people a series of questions. So yeah, you'd be like, who's going to find out about this?

Are you going to find my name? This is like the recreational marijuana usage survey that you're like, why? Who wants to know? Also, it doesn't help that Stone is a paranoid though, does it? But that's big for America because, you know, you're allowed to see violence and guns on TV, but you're not allowed to see a nipple. They're terrified of a nipple.

Yeah, why is that? Don't know. Weird. They're not going to shoot you. Bums they're not as scared of. They'll give you warnings about bums, but nipples really freak them out. They'll show someone being violently bashed to death or shot horrendously. But nipples freak them right out. It's a little nip.

Yeah. What's wrong with a little nip? It serves a great purpose to life. It is a life-giving body part. It is, yeah. But they're happy to see life being taken, but then they see the thing that gave us life, they're like, ooh, blew that out.

Not a nip. Hide that, please. Right, so people are becoming cooler with porn yep right I just wonder if the survey's

gone online is all what do you mean well they used to do it in person or on the phone or something but now they're

doing the survey online yeah and because if you're online it's gone digital yeah I mean you get

to stumble across it at some stage don't you accidents happen all the time. Yeah, they do. Accidents happen. Yeah, they do.

It does. Like, you accidentally put it in an incognito browser and then... Yep. Well, anything can happen. FBM. ZM. The Aussie rugby coach, Michael... Checker.

Checker. Yep. Cheeky. Just a cheeker. Oh, can we call him Michael Cheeky? Michael Cheeky. Cheeky Cheeker. He is. He's a bit cheeky. He is scuffer. Oh, can we call him Michael Cheeky? Michael Cheeky. Cheeky Cheeker. He is.

He's a bit cheeky. He is. Yeah, he is. He's banned players from using headphones. He's employed this tactic. Right. So they listen to headphones before they play a game to get them revved up. Yeah, or if they're going anywhere, he wants them talking.

He wants them interacting, talking about the game. Or just about anything. That's a bit dumb, isn't it? But maybe there's a culture in that team where they put the headphones on and you lose people. And don't talk to each other. Like you're trying to have a team meeting or you're trying to talk tactics before the game

and somebody's amping themselves. Yeah, well, they all said it's music to get them pumped up, but he said music's not going to win you games. Talking about how you're going to play it is going to get it. And if you can G each other up, you don't need music. Right. So you're not even allowed, like, when you're a break and you're on your own and you're, like, warming up your legs or whatever,

you're not even allowed to listen to headphones. No, he doesn't want to see headphones. And he said when they eat together, there's no phones. So you're not allowed to take your phone to the dinner table. Oh, he's like someone's, like, parents when you go home. And they're like, get off your phone. No, no. God, you're on that all the time.

God, look up and see the world happening around you. Although, to be honest, like, they need to start winning some games, don't they, Australia? So, I mean, you've got to try anything. This is, because I've watched this series recently and totally recommend watching it, The Defiant Ones on Netflix. This is about a drain. Oh, is that a a documentary, is it? Yeah, you should take my recommendation

and watch this, Megan. It's this funny thing where I tell them to watch something and then months later when Vaughn finally watches it, he tells everyone it's good and everyone's like, oh, is it? No, I only told you months ago. I'm amazing. It's because, Megan, the stuff you recommend

is 95% rubbish. I recommend stuff to you all the time that you come back and say, oh, my God, that's really good. No, because most of what you recommend is rubbish. What have I recommended that was rubbish? All the stuff I don't watch, I can't remember. See, you can name a whole bunch of things that I recommended that was good. Dynasty. I never recommended it to you.

I said Caitlin would enjoy it. You've been wiring on about it, though. No, but I know that you wouldn't. So, anyway, this documentary is about but I know that you wouldn't. So anyway, this documentary is about Dr. Dre and Jimmy Irvine. And it ends with Beats by Dre about the story of the headphones. It tells their backstories. And they said that when it really took off for them was when they started getting banned from places. Like ahead of the 2008 Olympics in Beijing, they made every major country, the big countries,

their own coloured Beats by Dre. The Brazilians was green with the stars and stuff on it. Made it look like their flags or what their country's well known for. And they got banned from the Olympics. And it was just like this media hype machine. Wow, got them all the publicity. Got them all the publicity that they couldn't have purchased. Yeah.

And he reckons, yeah, that was a real massive turning point for them, was just getting banned from places and banned from being used because that just made people want them more. But when you think of, like, the Olympics and all the footage they use, that's how athletes hype themselves up. Yeah. Like, I used to listen to music before I go to, like, a job interview. I had specific

songs. Well, like when you're C.D. Walkman. I'm not that old. The mini jazz player. The mini jazz player. But, you know, like you've got songs for everything. It hypes you up. Better than your make-going good luck buddy out there. Guys, high five!

And like before Roller Derby, we all used to listen to music because you're about to bash someone. But did you listen together or on headphones? No, on headphones. What was the song you listened to before Roller Derby? Heads Will Roll. Jeez. Yeah, it's quite aggressive

so you get like... Who sung that? Who sings Heads Will Roll? Robin. No. Oh, I can't remember. Yeah, yeah, yeahs. The yeah, yeah, yeahs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I talked about it yesterday and I'll mention it Oh I can't remember Yeah yeah years The year yeah years Yeah yeah years Right

Well I talked about it yesterday And I'll mention it again now Everything is awesome Is a great thing Is that Before a rugby game Or something Everything is awesome

Everything is cool When you're part of a team Like the All Blacks Everything is awesome When you're living the dream If Australia start winning It's your fault Vaughn It's because I tell them About everything is awesome FV living the dream if Australia start winning it's your fault Vaughn it's because I tell them

about everything is awesome FVM the podcast FVM I have literally just seen something pop up and it disturbs me because

it's a win it's a win for the for the rich and I you know I don't like to see the rich win he said no none of us do

anyway maybe not the rich but maybe they're extremely heavily mortgaged winning. Right. It's kind of nice to see them get a little win. Okay. Because let's face it, interest rates aren't going to be low forever.

But the Speedway is leaving Western Springs and Auckland. Which has been a point of contention. The Speedway that has been there forever and ever and ever. And my big problem was when the suburb around it became the place to be in the early 2000s. People moved there and then complained that the speedway was too close. It was too loud. It was like, ring.

They moved next to the speedway but the speedway was being too loud. It must have been loud because I remember sometimes at my old flat, if the wind was blowing a certain way, you could hear it. And that was like 4 or 5 k's away. They weren't complaining when they got a free ACDC concert in 2010. But they were complaining once a month, was it?

Speedway? Yeah, it was quite a weekend. But would it go late? No, not that late. Not like that. 10 or 11? Yeah. No later than that.

You can only make a noise complaint from 10.30 onwards, can't you? So your neighbours could literally be blasting anything. And you could ask them to turn it down nicely. You can't ask them, Hey, Speedway people, could you just turn down your cars a little bit? I love all those cars. So my issue was Speedway was there first. You don't move next to Speedway and then complain about the sound of Speedway.

So I'm not 100% sure if this is because of the locals and the complaining, or maybe they've had a better deal to go elsewhere, but I think it kind of sucks that Speedway was there and people moved in around Speedway and then it was Speedway's problem that it was too loud. They're talking about making it into a cricket venue. Oh, boring!

Replace something exciting with something exciting. Well, no, because you kind of need a good cricket venue because you've got all these nice, like Christchurch and Dunedin have got lovely ovals, Nelson, and now Auckland could have that. Do we not have a nice one in Auckland? Well, no, because everything just gets played at Eden Park and it's a weird shape for a cricket venue. Oh, God, here we go.

It's a weird shape. Well, it's only fair if that gets turned into a cricket oval, Speedway has to happen at Eden Park and it's a weird shape for a cricket venue. Oh God, it's a weird shape. Well, it's only fair if that gets turned into a cricket oval, Speedway has to happen at Eden Park. Which I'm sure would be real fun.

You know, I think they're going Especially with that race, you know that gap between the stadiums where they get the mowers in? Yeah.

If they had to like shoot through that little gap out into the outer field, do a couple of blip blap blaps around that and then come back in. It'd be like a tiny rally. That'd be great.

Yeah, I don't think that's the plan. No, that's probably not going to happen either, actually. You'd ruin the grass that he didn't park. But you'd go to speedway, you could see a car roll like 50 times. You'd go to cricket, you might see someone roll their ankle inconveniently. It's not really comparable on excitement levels, is it? You might not even definitively get a winner. You've got a

good 2020 game. It'll be a great venue. Blindfolded archery. What about doing that in the old speedway? No, because then you'll just shoot the neighbours. They'll have to build a nice bit of fence. No, but you moved there second with their blindfolded archery technically. So they could complain. You've got me there on my

original technicality. That would make me somewhat hypocritical. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. And done. Never, never get anything done before it needs to be done.

Today's Top Six are KFC and Britain are going to trial non-chicken chicken. What's it made out of? I don't know.

Like tofu. Just like fake, whatever fake chicken is made out of. Your favourite fake chicken out there. There's a lot of this. There's fakin, which is fake bacon. Yeah, if you try, there's a whole range of fake meat in the freezer at the supermarket and it's actually really

good. There's chicken nuggets. It might be real good, but have you tried real meat? A lot of it's made out of like veggies or beans. Okay. So the top six. So they're going to trial it, see how it goes, give the vegetarians an option.

But from my experience, very hard to please. So it's just jokes. It's just jokes. Vegetarians and vegans, we're friends. We're friends. Like some of your stuff's yum. You're trying so hard. I appreciate that.

Yeah, I'm trying. My lies are very transparent. It is yum as long as there's meat with it. Like I see vegetarian dishes sometimes. I'm like, that's nice, but you know what would make it better? A steak or a rissole. See, I don't mind like veggie dishes but it's just every now and again

I just love bacon and fish and chicken and all that. They can be really tasty. You don't need meat to make it tasty. Well, sure. So the top six

are the restaurants that could but should not follow KFC's lead. Number six, the Outback Steakhouse serving a mushroom patty in the shape of a T-bone steak. Sacrilege!

I can't even believe the words came out of my mouth. How do you have like a rare mushroom patty? Just rare. I don't know. And sir, how would you like your mushroom patty? Medium rare. Sorry, it's a mushroom patty.

It only comes one way and that's just yuck actually. Number five on the list of the top six other restaurants that could but should not follow KFC's lead. Number five, a Big Mac with tofu patties. Yuck! Your special sauce ain't going to save you now, Big Mac. Imagine that. Yeah.

Because I've tried vegetarian patties because I've been at barbecues with vegetarians, believe it or not, and they're like, oh, can I just cook mine where no meat's touched the grill? I'm like, oh, it's a barbecue. It's literally covered in last cooked meats left over the residue.

But I'm like, okay. You tried it. Steve. And I break a little bit off and it's very dry. You never tried a good one then. No, that's the thing. I said, how's this?

And he's like, cooked fantastically. No, idiot. And I said, it's not. It's dry. And he's like, no, this is, it's cooked well. One of my favorite burgers from Burgerfield was one of the veggie ones. You should try it. It's really good.

No. Number four. I considered. Number four on the list of the top six other restaurants that could but should not follow KFC's lead. The Taco Bell pulled pork taco with jackfruit instead. No. Delicious. How dare you.

Say what? Jackfruit is delicious as pulled pork. I have written down here, people who say jackfruit is almost impossible to tell the difference and as delicious as a replacement to pulled pork are the real criminals here. Megan. I still eat meat but you're missing out if you're not appreciating

a good meat joke. No, I've tried. That's alright but again, like a mixture of the two would be. Right. Because that's like

they eat less meat. Yep. At the moment, aren't they? Everybody's like, we've got to start eating less meat. Yeah.

Like a mix if it's okay but like that's less, isn't it? No, but you'd just still be having as much. Are you just thinking,'s okay, but that's less, isn't it? You'd still be having as much. You're just thinking, well, everyone else is eating less, so I can just eat the same. That's probably... That's how my grandad thought about recycling.

Or when everyone was like, stop burning plastic, it's bad for the environment. He's like, well, they have, so there's no need for me to. I'm off to light a huge fire, Rita. I'll be out there for a day. That's not how it works, Grandad. Number three on the list of the top six other restaurants that could but should not follow KFC's lead.

The Subway Meatball Sub, but instead of meatballs, marinated cauliflower balls. Oh, God, no. That's disgusting. No. That doesn't sound good. The meatball meat in a Subway Sub is questionable meat at best anyway, so just leave that one be.

Yeah. We don't know if that's... Number two on the list of restaurants that could but should not follow KFC's lead, traditional fish and chips, but instead of fish, something called tempeh. Now, I've just learned about this. Am I saying it wrong? I don't know how to say it. Tempeh.

It's a traditional soy product originating from Indonesia. It's made by a natural culturing and controlled fermentation process that binds soybeans into cake form. And apparently has a similar texture to fish when battered and fried. Have you tried it? Yeah, it's really nice. It is. Yeah, but I'll ask you this question, Megan.

You can't knock it till you try it. Have you heard the term, there's plenty more fish in the sea? Because if we stop eating them, there's going to be heaps too many, and the sea will be full, and sea levels will rise. And they're only going to choke on those plastic bags we keep throwing in the ocean. I know. Yeah. Let's help them out by eating them.

Oh, my God. And the number one on today's top six, a very vegetarian-friendly top six. Yes. You know we're friends. Any complaints, Vaughn, at what's your email address? Don't make it up. Vaughn at zmonline.com slash ilovemeatbytypingthis.com. They'll find it hard to finish that sentence.

Yeah. Number one on the list of the restaurants that could but should not follow KFC's lead. The Domino's Meat Lover Pizza. Yeah. With no meat, just eggplant, lentils, beans, cauliflower, beets, nuts, mushrooms and tofu. Yes, got you, got you. Fletch is even like, no, I'm out.

I'm punching out. That's nasty. No, it sounds horrible. Sounds horrible. That's today's top six. F.M. There's worry that this weekend there is going to be an out-of- of this world fireworks display

as there has been for the last four years in the same spot on the same weekend. You might be thinking what is the cause of this annual fireworks display? We've had Chinese New Year Diwali, that's always

in my neighbourhood, people think bombs are going off because there's a Diwali celebration with some fireworks. But you're also in West Auckland, very hard to tell because people just keep their boom boxes from November. They do, yeah. For any time. We've got year-round fireworks displays.

Sometimes you wake up and like, around now, June, July, you're like, exactly the opposite. So maybe they're celebrating a mid-winter fireworks. There's that really good one I wanted to buy from the warehouse, but you can't. It's just a car on fire in West Auckland. Oh, yeah, that was in the car park.

There was a car park display. I was like, what firework is that? That was just, yeah. That was just a car straight up on fire. No, this is a birthday party. Every year, a man called Damien Grant celebrates his son's birthday with a huge fireworks display

and this weekend will be his son's fifth birthday. So even in like the early years he wouldn't have even known what was going on this kid. Oh I'm probably terrified. My kids would freak out when they were like young. The loud noises, the bangs, the bright lights, it's a lot to take on.

The sensory experience is overwhelming for many. This guy just loves fireworks. Well, he's just celebrating the fact he's got a kid and he has a commercial level fireworks display. Is he mega rich or something? I don't know. Because you always hear like, oh, this year's New Year's fire display,

New Year's fireworks display cost the ratepayer $120,000. And you're like, Jesus. Can they go for that long? Seven minutes. Yeah, they're like, oh, this is a video of $400,000 of the fireworks catching fire in a boat and exploding, which I personally think is $400,000 well spent

because it looks terrifying and it's all whizz-banging at once. Very, you know, riotous and chaotic. But no, he just puts it on for his... For a five-year-old. Sends warning to all the notices with the neighbours within four kilometres saying, hey, look, I know some of you have got horses, if you're concerned... Hide your horses.

It's coming, but the neighbours in this Greenbelt area, you know, that area, those lifestyle blocks. Oh, no, they're not happy? They're not happy about it. They don't want it happening.

But you get free fireworks to play. Yeah. Do you think that kids have way better birthday parties than when we were kids? Well, my kids have

way better birthday parties than I ever had. Right. But August's birthday's, is it next weekend we're having August's birthday, she's having like a disco party and there's like... Where's my invite?

You're in Thailand. Oh, is that why I didn't get invited? Yeah. Is that the only reason? Yeah. Okay. No, because yeah, I'm all about getting a few more adults. I could have done disco.

So there's disco. There's like a balloon person. You're getting a balloon... It's like this one stop. There's these businesses now that do these one-stop party shop where they just come in and they put on the whole party. She had Moana at her birthday last year. That's right.

She was full-blown Moana. My kids have way better birthday parties. Indy's fourth birthday party was this full-blown fairy affair. There was a fairy and we hired a table. I was like, why are we hiring mushroom seats? They're kids.

They just sit on the ground. Because it makes it special. It does. And they love them. Also, you can't. And they're very thankful. Yeah. Because I guilt them so much about how much these things cost. Now, I know this party, you're excited about it,

but Dad's forked out a fair bit of cash, so just don't turn into a spoiled punk, alright? But you can't have a lame kid's birthday party these days because of Instagram and stuff, and the other parents will judge you. It is very sort of competitive. Yeah. Like, last year at August's party, I heard one of the parents say, well, this certainly raises the bar.

Like, in that sort of tone as well, and I was like, obviously they didn't want me to hear them say that, but I was like, oh god. It's not a competition No but it is It is I never even had a birthday party That's right I used to go to other people's

It's quite traumatic But like if you go to other people's birthday parties when I was little It was just like you'd sing, they'd be past the parcel And then like you'd get a little plastic bag of cake and a lollipop Like back in the 90s when I run a pretty good birthday party past the parcel I make sure everybody gets a layer. You work out how many kids there are going to be and then each one gets a layer

like a little bangle or something. Back in the day, I know it is, it's bloody. Back in my day, you didn't even look, did you? Your dad would turn around and he'd press stop on the cassette player. And if you lost, you lost. And the same kid could win every single round and they'd have a big prize at the end and that's life.

It is life. But not nowadays. What do your parents think of the extravagant parties? Oh, it's beyond there. They're like, wow. I'm like, you didn't think of doing anything like this? For me, when I was little. They're like, oh, we're busy.

You know, February's a busy month. It's what you do now though, isn't it? Isn't it a busy month? Is it a busy month? I'd just like to know the most over-the-top party you've been to. Your birthday party? Yeah, if you've been to a birthday party that had a commercial grade fireworks display, that's pretty good. It's not just kids' parties, it's adults as well.

Yeah. Okay. I think so. Like Sweet Sixteens. We don't do extravagant Sweet Sixteens. But I wonder, isn't there? There's that show. Yeah, my Super I think so. Like sweet 16s. We don't do extravagant sweet 16s. But I wonder, isn't there? There's that show. Yeah.

My super sweet 16. Is it going to get there though? Or do you stop caring when your kids get to about 10? There are some rich, insane people in New Zealand. I wouldn't be surprised if there are that level of someone's getting an Audi for their 16th and then daddy's throwing a big party. Nah. Not in New Zealand.

Why not? There's rich people here. You might get Mum's old Mazda 3, but you're not getting it out of here, are you? It's just because we don't have those. We never had those friends growing up. We'll have them now. That's why you can't understand that. My parents put $200 into my 1980 Holden Marina.

That was good. For your birthday? Yeah. I was like, woohoo. Oh. All right, well, let's take some calls. 0800-DARLS-AT-M 9696. How over the top was the birthday party that you went to?

Now, it could be a kid's party. It could be an adult's party. 6th, 8th, whatever, 21st. Give us a call. 0800-DARLS-AT-M. But talking now about the extreme, extravagant birthday parties you've gone to, the most

over the top, a man in the news because his 5 year old's getting another fireworks display, the neighbours aren't overly happy, I'd be stoked if that was my dad commercial grade fireworks because I'd be like yeah because they've got horses

can you get earmuffs for them? For horses? Commercial grade fireworks. Or if I was the neighbour. Because I would be like, yeah, fireworks. No, because they've got horses. Oh, okay. Like quite a few of them have got like... Can you get earmuffs for them? For horses? Like, could you go to Bunnings or Mitre 10 Megs and get like earmuffs? You could probably just make some earplugs for them out of sponges. Sponge. Like a car wash sponge. Sponge.

Okay. If you... Well, I'm just... I don't know. Yeah, I'm just thinking outside. I'm not an equine veterinary specialist But I know they don't like loud noises And they can like kill themselves

Jumping through fences and stuff Break their legs So we want to know When maybe you went to a birthday party That was a little extravagant Somebody said they went to a party With a guy they went to school with And it was very much American

Sweet 16-esque Oh okay And he was given his first car at this party. It was a Range Rover because his mum wanted him to be safe because there's some real idiots on the road. And the price tag was the cheapest we could find it online after leaving the party was $140,000. First car.

Oh, my God. Birthday party. Because your mum wants you to be safe. But his mum should be worried about me. I need to be safe on the road too. That's what I'd be saying if I was his friend. Yeah. What about us?

Like, sometimes he comes with me in the car and I drive like a madman in my Toyota Corolla. A bloody madman. And then she buys you a new Toyota Corolla. You're like, not what I was after. The new ones are much safer. Yeah, much. Not what I was after.

We'll take some calls. Rebecca, what was the most over-the-top birthday party you went to? I went to a Sweet 16 where the mum wanted to replicate the TV show. Yeah. And it was at like a hotel. It was like glow-in-the-dark theme. So there was all this stuff there. And then she had like a famous NZ singer,

Jay Williams. Oh yeah. Okay. So that was like, and then we all went outside and there was like a brand new BMW with a bow on it and everything. What? Oh my God. She should have hooked up with the guy that got the Land Rover.

Yeah. No, because yours was a guy as well, was it that got the Land Rover. Yeah. No, because yours was a guy as well, was it? Yeah, it was a guy. Oh, it was a guy. Okay. How much would insurance be? I'm being practical, but like... It's good to hear you thinking practical.

Guy, good lord. I'm just jealous. I know, same. Was everybody jealous or were they just like... We kind of expected it. Right. I mean, yeah, obviously. Was everybody jealous or were they just like... We kind of expected it. Right. I mean, yeah, obviously we were still jealous. Did you get to ride in it, though, at any time?

No, he, like, drove it round the car park, but I don't think he had his licence yet. Really? It would have been my dream if it indicated to get around and someone had, like, whoop, whoop, and, like, it'd been lit up and ticketed. Imagine learning to drive in a brand new BMW. Imagine.

Oh, just imagine. I know, imagine. God, we sound like a lotto ad, don't we? Cody, what happened? This was a birthday party you saw? Yeah, yeah. When I was at uni, I worked at Rainbow's Inn. Yeah.

And they closed the park on Saturday night after the people went home and hired it up for this young lady's fifth birthday. When you said young ladies, I was like... The whole place. The whole place. Fifth birthday. You'd be so tired at the end of your fifth birthday at the end of the day to just nod off on the long flume.

Yeah, yeah, pretty much. All the extended family came. There'd be no lines for anything. It'd be pretty great. No lines, it'd be pretty great. How much would that have cost, though, to hire the park? Say, well into the five digits, eh? Because Michael Jackson did that famously, didn't he?

For Disneyland, when, like, Paris Jackson and that were kids. He hired it out for a whole day. Disneyland got shut down. Got the whole, but that cost him. Yeah, that's a lot different than Rainbow's End. Yeah. Like, you literally need two days to get around that whole thing.

Some text messages in. My friend's 10th birthday, we took a limousine to a high-end restaurant. 10th birthday. For her 15th birthday, she got an Audi. Get out of town! I'm so jealous. I don't even have a car.

They can get an Audi later, but they need a shitty car to like appreciate it, you know? Yeah. You can't have your kid coming home into the gated mansion community in a Toyota Corolla. You can pretend they were the cleaners. I guess so. Somebody said, when I was younger, we went to a girl's birthday party when she turned eight.

It was a cashed up family. So the kids' party was extravagant, but the parents played poker at the party. And the winner got diamonds. What? That's crazy. This is in New Zealand. Mate, this is where you're heading with your Moana parties. No, no, no, no, no, no.

They're about to be cut loose. This is how it No, no, no, no, they're about to be cut loose. This is how it starts. This is how it starts. They're about to be, I'm going to teach them financial, some financial literacy.

I'm going to give them a certain amount of money and make them budget their own parties. Right. That's a good idea, actually. They'll just blow

all the money on one thing and have a real average money. August, I'll just buy lollies before our birthday. She'll be like, party's off,

I've actually worked out I don't need to share these lollies. Hosting Heartbreak Island, which starts Monday, Matutes, Matilda Rice joins us in studio. Hello. Hello. Good morning. Are you excited for us to see this? I'm so excited.

I feel like I've been keeping this secret for so long about how good it is that I can't wait to finally see it. So what did you see? Because you're hosting it. Were you like involved? Did you see the contestants interacting? Yes, but I probably saw like 20% and that was still really exciting. So I

feel like I'm still like with the rest of New Zealand in the excitement of seeing something for the first time. How scandalous is this going to be, this show? It's super scandalous. Like, I was quite surprised because I thought, oh, Kiwis are naturally quite reserved and they're like a little bit more conservative.

But these guys just put it all out there. Like, they were straight into it from day one, which is awesome. So yeah, it's going to be good. So, three nights a week at 7.30. TV2. But then Friday night.

What are we calling the Friday night version? Uncut. Uncut. So I think what Vaughn wants to know is, is he going to see penis? There is a little bit of full frontal. Is there? Yeah. Great.

I do believe. I mean, I feel like I'm kind of starting that rumor. I felt the beam of Caitlin's face because I sat with my dad to it and it just lit up. Caitlin, I do believe. I mean, I feel like I'm starting that rumor. I felt the beam of Caitlin's face because I sat with my dad to it and it just lit up. Caitlin, you creep. I was like, what? Because I've met some of the boys. I was like, who? Which one? Was it Harry? I mean, to be honest, I

haven't seen the full frontal. Maybe I'm starting a rumor, but I'm pretty sure there is full frontal on the Friday nights. When you went filming your hosting role, were you allowed to go and sit in the truck with all the cameras and stuff and then be like, show me camera two? Yes, then I started smoking cigars all of a sudden.

You're a creep. Like, just imagine an old school producer. Show me, I need a close-up of camera three. Camera three, close-up. But a couple of times when I was in the truck watching, I think I was more of a hindrance than anything because I was like,

oh my God, look at that, look at that right in the ears and they were kind of like, yeah, just get out of the truck. Get out of the truck. Get out of the truck. So can you break it down for us? Like what is the goal?

What is the situation of Heartbreak Island? Sure. So there's eight guys and eight girls. They're all single and super hot. And all ugly. Oh, and they're super hot.

Yeah, okay. And they basically pair up based on rating each other on photos and a short description. Right. Because the idea is that it's kind of like Tinder, but offline. Yeah. Because they rate each other based on photos

and a description, and then that changes as they get to know each other based on photos and a description and then that changes as they get to know each other. Right. Yeah. So they partner up and they compete in a series of challenges. They can swap partners during the show and basically the last couple standing wins a hundred grand.

Have you got any sniff for us of what a scandalous thing might happen? Any sniff? I'd say... Sniff a scandal. A little tease. Episode four, things take a bit of a turn. Yeah.

Okay. So, the first three episodes are awesome but then episode four throws a little bit of a curveball. Yeah.

Now, this was filmed in Fiji, is that correct? Yes. Did anybody stand on any coral? Not this time. Not this time. Not this time. You might not know, but Vaughan does.

He takes coral safety very seriously. Well, Lana Cockcroft almost died. I know. That's why we nearly lost a national treasure. Exactly. So, no, we were very careful about the coral. I brought my reef shoes along. I was going to say, sensible from you.

Good. And you're not trying to impress any of these eight sexy guys. You've got your own sexy guy at home. I'm going to bring my reef shoes. Yeah. Maybe a rashie just for sun protection too. Long sleeve rashie, I hope. Because people go too quickly on the singlet rashie.

Your arms can still get burnt. Absolutely. They definitely burn. Well, it starts on Monday. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. 7.30. Friday, 9.30 for diddles and boobs? Yeah.

And then Juke is repeating diddles and boobs on a Sunday night. Don't say that. On the Lord's Day, as the Lord intended us to finish our Sunday rites with our family, put the children to bed, and enjoy some grotesque nudity. The diddles and boobs day. Thanks, Matilda. Damn. A great story out of Australia.

Wow, was it? An old man's been caught doing a poo on a Brisbane street. Now, as the story goes, a little while ago in a Brisbane neighbourhood, a poo-poo started appearing. So this is... In regular occurrences, this wasn't just like once a month, poo started appearing quite regularly, human faeces. They knew that because it had a little bit of toilet paper generally with it, with a little white mark.

So people were like, oh, who's doing this? And it kept coming. Right. It kept happening. Well, Steve, who's doing this? And it kept coming. It kept happening. Well, Steve... In the same place? Not in the same spot, but in the same neighbourhood. Right.

Like various spots around the neighbourhood. Because I've just been listening to the Golden State Killer and he would pick different houses in the same neighbourhood. So very much like a serial killer, but a serial pooper. Right. So Steve's had a gutsful. He described his situation with the poo as being hit quite frequently. Right.

Oh, good Lord. Okay. And with the toilet paper, he thought, here's someone with premeditated. Yeah. That's not like going for a run and being like, oh, my God, I'm desperate. Yeah. And wiping your bum with a dock leaf. And also, if you're going for a run all the time, surely you'd get into that habit and

you'd poop before you run or you'd find a toilet. So Steve hatched a plan. Okay. Steve's plan involved working out what time of day the pooping was happening. Right. So he'd go for a walk at night and not see any fresh feces and then he'd go before work and he'd see fresh feces.

So he's like, it's happening overnight sometime. Okay. So Steve then worked out like what days of the week it was happening. Okay. So Steve then worked out what days of the week it was happening and decided he'd start hiding in bushes with a camera to catch the pooper. Well, he caught him. Wow. He's got him.

He took a camera into the bushes with him, which I mean, you know, Steve should definitely have written this down and taken a photo of himself with the plan and the newspaper of the day. Otherwise, posthumously, this is a hard one to pass. Also, you can get like hunting. Can't you get like motion detected security cameras and stuff? Yeah, you can.

Yeah, yeah. And then when they sense motion, they start. Yeah. That's true. That probably would have been an easier. I've got one of those. Yeah. And I get an alert on my phone and everything.

So Steve could have had one of those outside his house. Granted, a lot of things would have set it off, like cars. Cats and dogs, anything. But anyway, he was hiding in the bush, jumped out when he saw the older man in a sort of a bent at the waist, slight bend in the knee, pooping position. It's a great photo. It's so funny.

And he took a photo of him. And Steve said, I expected to be met with abuse. But instead, And he took a photo of him and Steve said, I expected to be met with abuse, but instead the man gave a friendly, hello, good morning, and then continued on his way. He said it was very, very strange. So he shared the photo thinking,

this is weird. Maybe this guy's not well. Right. And it turns out that this man has just actually resigned due to being caught. Okay. But he was the national quality manager at a large Australian retirement village company and also a member of the Brisbane City Council. So he was like a top executive, a top business executive.

Yep. And has been, I guess, caught for about, what are they, 35 poo dumps? I think they know of. 35? Stuck 35 poos to him. And do you know what? So the photos doing the rounds, you may have seen just the photo, but you may have just seen the top part of the photo.

Yeah, not his bum. Steve bent at the waist and slightly at the knee. But I didn't know this photo's also doing the rounds. There's a full length one. You can see the turd he's just done on the ground. So he was caught mid-turd. I've got New Balance shoes like that. I know, great.

Those are real. The reflective end on the New Balance has caught the light and reflected back at the camera. I'm sure New Balance is stoked about that. Those are street shoes too, not running shoes. Not running shoes, yeah. That's what I thought too. And also that turd is dangerously close.

This is where you squat and like hang off a bar to get your poo further away from your He's doing that next to someone's wall of their house. On a driveway. Not even in a garden. And is it me? This might just be me, but when I poo, I always wee as well. I can't remember the last time I pooed without weeing. Sometimes I'll do one.

Just depends. You do a wee when you're doing a poo? I mean, I don't need to tell the whole country. Because he's not. He's not. Because he's only got his pants kind of around it and he's not pushing it back to make sure he doesn't piddle all over his undies.

There are a lot of questions, Vaughan. There are a lot of questions. Has he commented? Has he come out and made a statement? I can't find. I mean, I think he's, without saying anything, has said enough. I think so.

Just think of the top executives at your workplace. Like, I can't imagine anyone. Oh, I think he's, without saying anything, has said enough. I think so. Just think of the top executives at your workplace. Like, I can't imagine anyone. Oh, I can't imagine Bogsy just spotting down in someone's driveway and defecating everywhere. Well, you're just not trying hard enough. I am. I can. I'm picturing her right now.

It's not pretty. It's not pretty. I'm imagining he's just going for a light jog around the waterways. He owns a beach house and I'm using a bit more and he's a, he'd probably turn in the water though. But this guy was taking his own toilet paper. He was thinking about this. That is the situation.

Like when you plan a long run for marathon training or whatever, you always take into consideration public toilets along the way. Yeah. Because you're definitely over the course of those longer runs going to need to go to a toilet. If you did have to do this, do it in a park at least. Yeah, find some grass.

Not in someone's driveway. But then here's in Australia, I'm always scared to go on like shin-high grass in Australia. Imagine doing a pill in a snake. Bites your testes. Yeah, okay, you've got me there. I'd probably use someone's driveway instead.

The concrete jungle, it's a lot safer. Just for safety's sake. We're joined on the phone by our Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern. Good morning. Good morning. A little bit of a chat pre-maternity leave? Oh, yeah, yeah, I guess. Although I'm not letting that kick in until really it has to, I guess.

Look at you go. Still chugging along. Don at you go. Still checking along. Don't you just want to sit down and put your feet up for a second? Yes. Good. It's good to know you're human. You know you don't have to feel guilty about that. You are pregnant, heavily pregnant.

Yes, yes. Yeah, no, look, I definitely understand that strong urge not to nest, just to sit on the couch. Well, I experience that every day, and I'm not carrying another human inside me, so I don't think you should feel guilty about that. It's called relaxing. Because you're still going out and doing all the public engagements, are you getting a lot of crazy advice and a lot of advice from people?

Yeah, but none of it's crazy. It's all sound. I think the one that's probably starting to wear me down a little bit is make sure you get your sleep because you won't get any more for 20 years. That one's pretty crushing. Yeah, you're like, Prime Minister, we don't sleep a lot by nature anyway. We've got kind of a country to look after. I just smile.

What's the positive advice, like one that you've really remembered? I think Clark's favourite was just a dad who came up to him and said you're going to get a lot of advice but the most important thing to know is that banana stains. Does it? Banana?

It leaves a weird, yeah, for some reason chewed up, spat out banana is worse. Yeah, yeah. And isn't it funny you don't realise until kids do? Well, how often, you don't often like drop banana on yourself, do you? No, no. They're kind of like a quite,

made to be eaten quite handy. Yeah, yeah, and they squish it up and they throw it all around the place. Is the nursery all set? You got everything all set out and ready to go? I'm going to say it's still a little bit on the disorganised side. It's a bit chaotic in there, so no. I take that as a sign that I'm not due any time soon

because I have no desire to go in there and sort those boxes. That or Clark's going to have to put together kit set furniture by himself. Well, there's the furnitures in there. I said to Clark this morning, do you think we should try and sort that out this weekend? He was like, kid's not going to be in there for a while. Well, we'll see about that.

So I saw lots of people giving you presents and stuff. Do you get to keep everything that people give you? So if it's... If someone's given it to me really, you know, personally and I've met them and, you know, it would just be a bit mean to say no. Or if they've had made it, then I do. If it's from a, you know, if it's from a company or something, no. We either say, can I donate it to someone else or we send it back. So lots of people have been really great and said,

fine, you can donate it. And so I've got a little collection of stuff to give away, which is nice. That's a good situation to be in. But the hand-knitting booties are just, some of them are just extraordinary. The amount of detail that people have put into these little things, that's so lovely.

And I'll make sure other people get used out of them too. Now you and your political party have been in big favour of extending maternity leave, but you're pretty keen to, like, get back to work pretty quickly. Is there a certain irony that you can appreciate in that? Just kind of accept that I'm in a different set of circumstances. Right. So, yeah, no, I'm a big supporter of, you know, 26 weeks of fraternity leave, but I'm the only one in the country doing this job,

and so I do think it's a bit different for me. And also, I'm lucky. Clark can take time out to be the primary caregiver. The house that we live in is very close to where I work in Wellington. I've got enough space that no one's going to mind if there's a crib in the corner. So I'm lucky. So I can make it work as well. Are you, has Clark already inquired on like how old the baby has to be

before it can be the baby Bjorn front pack and on a boat fishing? He's, yes, actually, I'm going to be honest. He's quite miniature life jacket. So I think that's probably the only thing holding him back. Right. Flotation. Yeah, that's good that that's been thought about, though. That's an important aspect. No, no, no, he's got plenty of thought into that.

Yeah, of how to get a baby on a boat ASAP. He's only got two front packs, just trying to accommodate every egg. The rocking of the boat would probably put the baby to sleep. People pay thousands of dollars for those cribs on, you know, synchronised rockers. Take them on a boat, probably does the same thing. I have no doubt that he'll say, you know, stop putting it in the back of the car and driving her out.

I'm just going to take a blight around the hierarchy golf. Take it on a boat. Can you tell us, because you've said, like, in our last interview you don't have time for Netflix, but have you got a list of things you want to watch in your downtime? As a parent, as the only parent in the studio, I can say, ha, ha, ha, downtime. Yeah, I guess so. Downtime with a newborn.

I told someone that Clark wants to build a deck while we're at home, and I was surrounded by laughter from all of the parents. I don't know. When the baby's finally asleep and you've got some time, the last thing you feel like doing is waking it up with a hammer.

Yeah, I'm probably going to be the first to point that out. No deck building! No deck building! Hey, thanks so much for chatting to us. Best of luck with everything.

We don't talk to you again before the baby arrives. Best of luck. Thank you very much and I'll be looking for my tips when I come back on air. Yeah.

I've got heaps. Vaughn's the only one. I'm one of those annoying people that will happily dish out advice and then be like, but people give you advice all the time. Just ignore it. Well, look, your kids look happy, so I'll accept it. And, you know, I reckon being from Lawrence, we probably have similar, probably similar inclinations.

But less smacking. Less smacking the side of the millennium. I'm not dishing out the smacks that I was dished out to, you know. Just holding the smacks, no smacks. Just in the process of thank you so much. Talk soon. ZDM, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. All right, joining us in studio in about 10 minutes' time,

a couple of All Blacks. Producer Caitlin, you're going to have to be well behaved. She's already getting excited. I'm going to put lipstick on. I was going to say, have you put your lippy on yet? I already put lippy on. What shades have you got? What options?

I reckon you've got time to pop over to, is Lou here in makeup? Hey, that's mean to me. Do that maroon colour, that looks nice. Oh yeah, the dark. I'll put some more staroon? Do we know if these all blacks, I don't know which ones are coming in, but have we done some research

as to whether or not they're single? James, you do rugby, you know about rugby? Are these guys single? I think he knows stats and stuff, not like who's single. So I'd say they're still pretty fresh. Damien McKenzie's cute, I think he's got chat. I think he's got banter.

He was at the undies show that we did. Yeah, I remember that. What kind of undies? I'll remember that. No, we commentated the Fashion Week show last year. Megan wants to know what colour undies he was wearing. Well, no, they changed. They did lots of different changes, didn't they?

She'll know every single combination. He was in the red. He was in the red. Black, orange, orange, grey with a pattern, she'd be like, I don't know who he is. I remember grey with a pattern. You wait till... Caitlin's all chatting now, but wait till they get here. Please don't embarrass me at all.

I'm not even going to look at them in the eyes. We were thinking that you'd conduct the interview. No, that's a silly idea. You know what, I can't. Caitlin on rugby. It's a new segment. No, that's dumb. That's not going to work. I don't's a silly idea. You know what, I can't. Caitlin on rugby. It's a new segment. No, that's dumb. That's not going to work.

I don't know anything about rugby. Oh, it says here he's single and ready to mingle. That's right. He was the one that wanted a date. How old is he? He was one of the news that he was in the All Blacks. Oh, well, let's... Wait, wait, wait. When was he born?

1995. He's 22, wait, wait. When was he born? When was he born? 1995. He's 22. No, no. No, he's 23 now. Oh, yeah, he's 23 now. 23, there you go. That's far too young. That's five years younger than me. He's one year younger than my husband.

And I'm way older than you. God, he's 13 years younger than me and I'd hook up with him if I wasn't married. Oh, poor Damien. Friday Sashbuck. God, poor Damien. Friday Flashbacks. God, I hope they haven't heard this. Same. Alright, it's time for Friday Flashback, a warm-up for Friday Jams,

which are going to kick off at nine soon. So this is from an Australian band who have only just learnt that they were Australian and always thought they were British. Me too. For some reason, yeah, totally. Came out in 2008,

so 10 years old, meeting the criteria of our Friday Flashback. Yeah. From some reason, yeah, totally. Came out in 2008, so 10 years old, meeting the criteria of our Friday flashback. Yeah. From an album called In Silico. The things I've learned about this song today, including that the artists were from Australia, was that it was used as the official theme song on

WWE Cyber Sunday 2008. Yeah. It was used for an official video highlights package of the 2008 Belgian Grand Prix. Oh, it's a Grand Prix song. And an instrumental in the end credits of the Matt Damon movie The Martian. Didn't know that.

Absolutely no idea. Coming to Owakuni Mardi Gras as well in a couple of weekends time. From Pendulum, it's Propane Nightmares. ZM. our nightmares. See them. ourselves into In a trail of fire I know we will be free again In the end we will be one In a trail

of fire I'll burn before you bury me Set your sight for the sun Pangeolone Propane Nightmares at Owakuni Mardi Gras. So that's sold out. So you're tough luck if you haven't got your tickets for that. It's Friday Flashback. Feedback, Vaughan?

Quite a bit of bad feedback, actually, from people who were out of touch then and are out of touch now. But, I mean, that's just a poor reflection on them more than right. I feel like you just chucked the bomb in there and you were like... Yeah, and then I just walked away. Yeah. That's what it felt like. I was like, here you go, I'm walking away.

Yeah. From all the troubles in my life, I'm walking away. Is that your next flashback? Could be. Well, if people didn't like that kickstarting their Friday, maybe it's a slow jam time. Right. Joining the studio in about 10 minutes' time.

I believe Caitlin there might be a little bit late. About 10 minutes away. Yeah, we're running five minutes late. She's got her lippy on. Nani Laomapé coming in along with Damien McKenzie. And Damien McKenzie in the news just a couple of months ago saying he was single. His friends want to set him up.

He's single and ready to mingle. We don't know if he's still single, but you've actually put your lippy on and you're doing your hair. She says stop it and she's brushing her hair. Stop it. Now, are you working on some questions? Because if he is single we should probably get you in here to ask him some questions. It's so embarrassing, but yes I have.

Okay, give us one question. Give us a question. If you go away on tour to Argentina, how many times would you FaceTime me? Why Argentina? I don't know. That's got to be the hottest country, right?

It's where the rugby is. Of all the countries that they tour to, Argentina's got to be the hottest, right? Yeah. Okay. Right. Okay. Is that a good one?

It's all right. I mean, yeah. Maybe come up with a few more. Okay. Okay. I want to tell you about a good one? It's all right. I mean, yeah. Maybe come up with a few more. Okay. Okay. I want to tell you about a study that's come out now. This is one of those like official studies, so it's got a really long title.

Yep. Sickness absence diagnoses among abstainers, low-risk drinkers, and at-risk drinkers. Consideration of the U-shaped association between alcohol use and sickness absent in four cohort studies. So is it drinkers having sick days? Yeah, who has more sick days?

People who don't drink, drinkers or boozy alcoholics. Okay. Boozy midweek, like, drinkers. This might blow your mind. This is a recent study. It's just come out in the last few days that the people who either drank one to 11 units of alcohol a week or one to 11 units of alcohol a week

or 1 to 34 units of alcohol a week, that's more of the high end. Yep. If I surprise you, that's like five drinks a night every night of the week. Right. They took less sick days than people who don't drink at all. Is that because the alcohol is killing the bugs? Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.

Well, yeah, some people swear on, what are they, if you've got a, you feel a bit fluey or you've got the cold, some people will do shots of whiskey, won't they? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I put a bit of whiskey in your lemon honey. Is that what makes a lemon honey a hot toddy? Boozy-ness?

Maybe. Like it steps it up? I don't know. Well, it's what makes an orange juice a screwdriver, right? Yeah. So everything just gets a cooler name when you add booze to it, basically. A mimosa. So this stuck across not just like, they went into what caused the sick days.

Okay. Mental health disorders. Yeah. People who drank had less. Yeah. Muscular, skeletal. Less or are you masking? Or are you just pushing it down?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Push it down, push it down, push it down. Have a drink and I'll make you feel better. To be fair, if you're drinking five nights, every night of the week, at least five drinks, you probably don't have time to feel sad. Or you're like, do I feel drunk or sick? I'm not sure.

Or you start to feel sad, so you start on your first of five. I don't know. I mean, that's problematic sad, so you start on your first of five. I don't know. I mean, that's problematic in itself. So musculoskeletal disorders as well. They took less days off for that. Drinks away the pain. Yep.

Diseases of the digestive system. Well, it's like a hot wash every night, isn't it? Sure. It's like washing it down with methylated spirits, but not methylated spirits. Shouldn't be drinking that. Diseases of the digestive system. Diseases of the digestive system. Diseases of the respiratory system. So that's like cold and flus and everything.

Right. So they took less days off for all those things. Now you might be thinking, where did this happen? This happened quite a large sample size of Finland, France, and the United Kingdom. In the UK, UK people drink just as bad, if not more than us. They love a drink. They love it. They love it.

Does this take into account their general health? Because could they be like not very healthy human beings, but they're just still going to work? Well, they don't take sick days. That's all the study looked into. However, when they do take sick days, it's generally from accidents. Because they're drunk.

Like they fall over and they really hurt themselves. Not just kind of like cold and flu or like disorders or not feeling great. They just like literally fell down some stairs because they had a few drinks on a Tuesday. And what kind of jobs are these people doing? It was across a range of jobs. Like heavy machinery? Well, they're not drinking at work. They drink when they get home.

Yeah. And then presumably sleep it off. Okay. Or shake it off and get back to work. Reassuring. If you like a few drinks during the week, like a couple here and there. Don't leave anybody to judge you.

But now science will back you up saying it'll actually keep you at work more. FGM. I believe the All Blacks that we're waiting for are at Radio Sport at the moment. God, what are they doing there? They're doing an interview, Fletch.

Talking about sport. Before they come down here. Before they get punished with us. They're like, God, that was good. We got to talk about sport. Got to talk about tactics. Rugby, the feeling and the tame. Where are we off to next? Oh, Zeddy and Fletch want to make it. Who are you playing?

Is that thirsty producer still working there? I just sprayed some perfume. And lipstick. And now you're doing your hair. Right, okay. Well, I'm proposing we do Fact of the Day here. This is a real, it's going to make people think they're late for work, but we'll do it anyway, and then we'll do them.

Okay, do it quickly, please. Is that motion seconded? Yes, aye. Thank you. All in favour? Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye. Aye.. Thank you. All in favour? Aye. Aye. Aye.

Are we going to do these things professionally? That's noted for the minutes, Kate. Look at that in the minutes. All right. Well, if the minutes have been confirmed, it must be time for... Fact of the day is quite amazing. This happened in Ireland in 2009.

Yeah. The Irish police released the name of their worst driver. Okay. Because they said this person is leagues ahead in driving statistics for tickets, parking tickets, speeding tickets, infringement notices. And this person's name is Prawal Jazdy. Okay. They said this is the person who is driving on a EU driver's license.

Okay. And they're a problematic driver. And look at how bad they are. Kind of like a name of shame campaign. It was at that stage that someone pointed out to the Irish police department that Prowell Jazdy is how you say driver's license in Poland. The police had written out

over 200 tickets to Prowell Jazdy. And just said, this is amazing. Prowell Jazdy is just like the worst driver. Not, I guess, it blows my mind no one ever checked the dates, the date of births correlated, the eye colour. Because all the details were on the EU driver's licence. So all these Polish drivers were being pulled over. They were passing their licence.

Yeah, and when they did further investigation into it, they ticketed over 60 different Polish people. Yeah. And wrote all their names in the forms as Prowel Jazdy. Prowel Jazdy. Does that mean they get away with not paying? Yeah, they got off the ticket. Because they had your licence.

I don't know if they have your name completely. The Irish police just look Irish and brilliant. Because above it, it says that, so I've got a picture of the licence here, and you can see in the top right-hand corner, it's not even where the name, see Prowell Jazdy up there. Oh, yeah.

This is the name part here. Oh, idiots. They were taking this, now this, I believe, says that this is a representative license of Poland. Right. So because of the EU, they've got to know what country within the EU you come from. Now, beside it, it says in Polish, Prowel Jazzy.

But it's set out very similar to ours. I thought it would be set out weirdly, but it's in the same places where you'd get the name on our license. Number one is always the name. Yeah. But no, they ticketed Prowell Jazzy a lot. And you're not going to say anything, are you, when you get that ticket?

No way! Because if you've got a mistake like that, you're getting off a ticket. You're out. So good. And it wasn't until they released it they embarrassed themselves and someone was like um, that's how you say driver's license in Polish. And they were like, oh, Timmy, sure. Anyway, we're thinking. So today's fact of the day That's how you say Driver's license in Polish Yeah No like Oh to be sure

Anyway where have been you So today's fact of the day Is that in 2009 The Irish police were ticketing Prowell Jazdy At record numbers But that's just how you say Driver's license in Poland

Fact of the day Day day day, day, day, day. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Nani Lomapi and Damien McKenzie in studio with us ahead of the All Blacks game on Saturday. Good morning. Morning. Morning, morning.

Morning. Am I saying your name right? I felt like I didn't say it right. No, it was good. It was okay? Yeah, it was good. I don't want to say it wrong. I've been practising. Ask anybody.

Around here. I've been practising for a while. First of all, this is the first All Blacks game of the season. Is there like nerves ahead of the first game? Yeah, I think there's always nerves. Test match rugby is a whole other level to what we used to be playing for a super franchise. So, boys are pretty excited. It's been a great week of training.

So, boys are looking forward to get into it. And it's France first up? Yeah, France first up. Are we going to beat them, eh? Yeah. Don't. I don't think you should say that. They're a pretty good side.

They're a passionate side. So, yeah, I'm sure it'll be a close encounter. But hopefully we come out on the right side. I was just reading, we talked about this earlier in the show, the Australian rugby coaches ban headphones. The players aren't allowed to listen to music before the game. Do you guys do that? Is that kind of like a ritual, like a pre-game thing?

No, no, you've definitely got to listen to some music before the game to calm the nerves, otherwise you'll just be thinking about the game too much. What's on your playlist? I just listen to slow jams. Slow jams? What, like old school slow jams? Yeah.

Or new, like some of the boys in JoJo? Yeah, hard. Really? But how does that amp you up? I don't want to be like that amped up feeling. I just... Oh, like calm you down. Yeah.

Right, okay. And what do you listen to, Damien? Justin Bieber, I heard. Katy Perry, some Taylor. Yeah. I like to listen to a bit more upbeat music. Yeah. I feel like you're dodging the answer here.

Don't be ashamed. If it's Miley Cyrus. We've all got a guilty pleasure. I don't really have like a set song It's just whatever I'm feeling Put it on shuffle Oh yeah Just sort of a song I'll add that to my playlist

For the bit of the pre-match Now behind us In our studio here this is Caitlin Do you want to come in? She's coming in She read that article where you're struggling to find a girlfriend even though you're an all black. Do you?

So, yeah, there was an article where your friends said they were trying to set you up with people. Has that bit you on the bum? Are you upset that that article went out there? Yeah, I didn't think it was a bit of a... I was taking the mickey of it. Was it a stitch-up? If I'm 22 looking for love I've got an issue

like you're happy to be single at 22 and can I say at the moment sporting a beautiful moustache oh it's a beautiful moustache

I reckon more moustaches than the game of rugby your Terry Wrights your Gary Whetons looking back historically some great All Blacks have had big

prominent moustaches yeah I think there's a few few of the boys down at Cheesy started growing the moustache. Right. Yeah, mine's taken a bit longer than theirs. Well, you're blonde.

That actually is a brave move to grow a moustache when you're blonde. Why? Because it doesn't come through. It comes through lighter. Whereas if you've got darker hair, it doesn't need to be as thick to look thick. Oh, okay, okay. But blonde moustaches. I think that's why you're still single you think the mustache yeah i want to yes they're going there my mates when they stitch me up all right okay well caitlin's got some questions i have just a couple of questions if that's okay

she's our single friend that we are trying to stitch up i'm single but i'm like i'm older than you by a few couple of years. Not that old. Is that a problem? You don't mind about the older ladies? Just ask the question. We're never coming back anymore. Even I'm embarrassed.

Narnia's like, I like this. I'll come back as long as it's not about me. I'll bring it all back in every week to the slaughter. Okay, Damien, if you were to slide into my... Wait, wait, is this like a date? Oh, no. Well, I don't know. Should I swap seats?

It is. It is. It is. We put you there on purpose because she can get a little handsy. No, no, no. Yeah, so, okay. If you were to slide into my DMs on Instagram, Caitlin Mowat, that's my Instagram name,

what would you say? Like, what would be the first thing you'd say do you slide into DMs he might not even slide into DMs not at all don't give him an out look at this poor

22 year old lamb to the slaughter next question if you're on tour in Argentina would you how many times a week would you FaceTime me

how many times a day would you FaceTime me? How many times a day? The interesting thing about that question is it's a question a mum could ask as well as an essential girlfriend. I don't know. Just make up a number, Damien. I honestly don't know. The worst date I've ever had. At least once a day.

At least once a day. Just like that. Okay, I've got one more question. Just one more question. This might be easy. What do the wives and girlfriends get of the All Blacks

get as perks? You're jumping the gun here, Katie. You're jumping the gun. No, no, no. This is just like, in the future, a year or so from now, if we get married,

what would be, what perks would I get for being married? Like shopping discounts? Yeah, or just like good seats at the games and stuff. Could I come with you on the plane so that you wouldn't have to FaceTime me? I don't know if you'll get on the plane, but there's tickets to the game. Narnia probably knows a bit more than me.

What about you, Narnia? Should we date? This is not working with me, Damien. I'll get you your ticket to the game That's pretty good I can't leave I want to leave but I have to press the buttons I might leave

You leave Leave the studio and then leave that space out there And then they can safely leave once you've left That way they'll go that way Hey sorry about that Sorry about that. Sorry about that, man. That's just how every day that happens.

Hey, well, good luck against France. Smash him. Thank you. You've rattled him now. He's rattled. I'm lost for the game. Need to get back

to the slow jams. Listen to the slow jams. He needs a good one-on-one with Hanson. He needs Steve Hanson one-on-one to get this out of his system. Hey, thanks so much

for coming in, guys. Best of luck. Cheers. Thank you. Spy is next. I'm so embarrassed. Wasn't even me. Heartbreak Island starts on TVNZ 2 Monday. It's going to be three nights a week. There's even an uncut one on Friday.

We talked to... You apparently might see an uncut one. You might see. Stop. Hey, look, it's our last day before holidays. I stopped caring half an hour ago. That's pretty outrageous for New Zealand TV. Yeah, we might see some doodles. We can't guarantee doodles. No, Matilda said there's definitely some rooties.

She said there's rooties. She didn't guarantee doodles. No. Look, bit of controversy because at the moment, Love Island is also available on demand. And people are binging this. You're watching. Australia is. No, she's watching them as they happen now. Oh, okay. Because last time when she started watching Love Island is also available on demand. And people are binging this. You're watching. Australia is, no, she's watching them as they happen now.

Oh, okay. Because last time when she started watching Love Island. She was binging. They had finished the season so she could binge. But I think the UK and Australia have got Love Island going. Right. At the same time. And so week by week.

Okay. I'm just looking at pictures. Because the story is, like, not everyone is happy. Because some people were saying that Love Island needs more diversity on the show.

So different sizes of men and women because... So not ethnic diversity. What is ethnic diversity like? Because last time Love Island UK didn't really watch it

but cast my eye across it a couple of times. Pretty good diversity. Yeah, I'd say pretty good diversity. You know I appreciate diversity. I know you do. I'm up there with the United Nations. Yeah. I appreciate diversity I know you do I'm up there with the United Nations

I appreciate a little bit of everything Yeah, not ethnic diversity I think it's alright in that regard But yeah, diversity with the bodies So people are saying The women are too slim The guys are too toned It's unachievable

But it's not unachievable because they've achieved it. Yeah. It's not unachievable. It's not Barbie. We're not looking at someone whose proportions would literally cause you to die and you'd need surgery to do it. These guys have obviously achieved it, right? But also we're not looking at Love Island to achieve that.

No, let's be honest. Nobody, and it's horrible to say, but nobody would watch it. Yeah, I guess that's kind of the appeal, isn't it? If everybody was like overweight. The hotness of it. Let's be completely honest, it wouldn't rate. Banging, babes, banging. But it's not, but that's not really the reason you watch it, though, is it?

You watch it because it's so trashy and train wreck. Yeah. Drama. And it's drama, isn't it? But also because it's hotties. Yeah, they're hotties. Yeah. I feel like we shouldn drama, isn't it? But also because it's hotties. Yeah, they're hotties. Yeah. I feel like we shouldn't be ashamed for appreciating.

Like, these people, like, I've watched enough to know that while their bodies might be in great nick, not a lot happening upstairs. So, like, there's the trade-off there. Should we be like, well, actually, I want more intelligent people on the show. I want a rocket scientist in there to discuss rocket stuff that I'm incapable of coming up with on the spot right now. Yeah, again, that's not going to work, is it? But exactly, that's kind of comparable, isn't it?

There's definitely like a type of person. Yeah. And, I mean, they've gone on it willingly. One of the dudes, I'm just looking at a cast photo for the season, one of the guys isn't as ripped as the rest. It's him we should be feeling sorry for. He's got a shirt on in the promo pics and everybody else is topless. Do you think people have the same

feelings about Heartbreak Island? Very similar. Everybody's pretty ripped. That there should have been more diversity. I don't know. Kaylin, you've watched all of these. Would you watch it if everybody was overweight? Um, it depends.

Like, I mean, it's the drama, so it's hard to say. Yeah, it's the... I don't want to be like the person that says it's the personalities, but if they're all, like, dumb and boring, then there's no point in watching. Like, if they're boring and, like, totally hot, there's no point in watching anyway because they're not going to create... Yeah.

So you're saying they could have a couple of overweighties and it'll be fine. Are you talking a quota system? I don't know. Like 20%. Sometimes I would like to see more real people. But then I don't want to go along to an audition, not for this show, but let's hypothetically say I go along for the audition

and they're like, perfect, we need to fill the quota. I'll be like, absolutely, how dare you. Absolutely, how dare you. It's different to movies where movies kind of you expect to represent real life and all aspects and every ethnicity. But, I mean, this doesn't represent real life. We don't need everyone represented. No.

But then if you look at it, it doesn't represent people's bodies. Because what is it, half of us are overweight? I know, but does it have to? No, that's what I thought. This escapism nonsense didn't really have to be representative. I don't want those people to represent me. I would hate for aliens to be like, all right, we're about to go to Earth. Let's see what's happening.

Oh, love is land. Okay, we'll watch this and see what's happening. That's what they almost look like and think like, what a bunch of morons. It's hot, but morons. Let's invade and eat them. Yes, yeah. You wouldn't have eaten. You wouldn't have come for the feed if it was me on there.

But maybe they'd only eat the hot ones. Hopefully. This could be great news. But then, like, did the average people become the hot people because the hot people got eaten? It brings the bar down. Yeah, which is great for a minute because then you're the hot, but then they'll eat you next.

Oh, right. So we're all going to be eaten. There's no hope for all of us. Oh, I hope I get eaten near the first here, you know? It'd be complimentary. It would be. I'd hate to be left to last. Or they pick up this human

and they pick me up and they're like, we're going to eat him. I'm like, yes. First out of the block, they're like, this one's going to need to go in the crock pot.

Render the fact. They're like, damn you aliens. Now, I mentioned just before that as a top tier broadcaster, Oh my God, no one calls you that. I have a busy itinerary.

Okay, yep. Yep. No one calls you that. I have a busy itinerary. Okay. Yep. Yep. And one thing I have overlooked. Which, by the way, normally involves finishing work at 10.30 and going home and playing Fortnite for three hours. Well, that's busy.

That squad needs me. Right. That's a top tier broadcaster life. Top tier broadcaster. Yes. So one thing that we said we'd do and I specifically said I'd do would be just this little sort of, just this little junket for a movie company.

I don't know if you've heard of this movie company. It's small independent films primarily, but Disney. Oh, right. Okay, yeah. Disney Films and Marvel Studios. You guys heard of them? They've had a bit of recent success. Right.

I think I watched a movie recently. That was by Marvel? It was all right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Was it the Clicky Fingers one? Yes. Yes, that's the one. Actually, that's done pretty well for them.

Yeah, pretty well for them. Now, the next movie from these small independent filmmakers is a movie called Ant-Man and the Wasp starring Paul Rudd. Yes, I'm glad you've heard of him. Here are some of the movies he's been in. 1995's Clueless. Was he? He was in Anchorman.

He was in Anchorman, 40-year-old virgin. I love you, man. He, in fact, said a slapping of bears. Let's never forget he was in Friends. He was in Friends. Yeah. As Phoebe's boyfriend. He was in the first Ant-Man in 2015

and he's teaming up with Evangeline Lilly, who was in Lost and a lot of other Hobbit movies and everything, for Ant-Man and the Wasp. Now, this is just a small, this is the sort of thing I just do on the weekend every now and then, but the trip would involve flying to Taiwan. right okay no big deal right now i was offered business class but

i can't promise that for everybody but flying interviewing two big stars yeah for this film they've made and then flying back but unfortunately i'm on holiday starting in exactly one hour's time. So you can't do this because you're going to Raglan. The Gold Coast. Oh, okay. And yeah, some Raglan time. Maybe even a trip to the agricultural field days. Right, okay.

You are passing this up for a trip to field days. No, no, this specific, I've got a family holiday to go on in the first part. Okay. And that's where Bree comes into it. What do you mean that's where I come into it? This is where I would like to offer from the dizzying heights of top tier broadcasting to an up and comer such as yourself. God, you talk some crap, Vaughn.

Who's on this? What is this, Instagram? Is that what it's called? All the rage. Yeah. I would like to offer you the chance to go to Taiwan to interview Paul Rudd and Evangeline Lilly from Ant-Man and the Wasp. That's amazing. This weekend.

Why didn't you offer it to Megan? Because she's going to Thailand literally after the show. And you, you're off to God knows where on one of your bloody crazy sex trips. Deny it He can't He's not allowed to lie on Friday That's the rule This is a lot of pressure I feel like you're putting on me

What am I meant to ask them? Yeah, Bourne What was your list of questions? What was your list of questions? Well, as I was travelling in business class That's when I'd be doing my business Right, okay So will Brie be travelling in business class, that's when I'd be doing my business. Right, okay. So will Bree be going in business class?

Oh, my gosh. Great. Good joke from you. You were right. Absolutely not. No, no. It's not because you're a woman. It's because nobody knows who you are.

Channing Tatum. Channing Tatum. Oh, yeah. I think he unfollowed me, actually. Did he? Yeah, I had to cry about it. me, actually. Did he? Yeah, I had to cry about it. Oh, no. Did he actually?

Tried to DM him. Was it our fault? Got to cease and desist. God, I'm glad I didn't push for you to fly business then. I actually have a question I really want to ask Paul Rudd. Yeah. Because I had a run-in with an ant once, and it bit me in a very bad spot.

Oh, but you're from Australia. That's what ants, ant's here, they don't do anything, do they? They're annoying. Do we have bitey ones? Do you have green ants? No. Holy hell, you don't want to be bit by one of them and I got bit in a very bad spot. Were you sitting on the ground?

Yeah, I was having a picnic actually. Yeah. On a date. What's the bad spot? It's one of two. Good Lord. Either one of those two that I'm thinking of. It's one of two parts to this particular thing and one of those got bit.

Did it swell? It swelled. Good Lord. I don't think it's gone down. You're definitely racist with Paul. And I want to know if it was him. Knock yourself out. Ask him.