ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - June 27 2019

Episode Date: June 26, 2019

Producer Anya has just tried Vegemite for the first time, Community Notices and where did your parents take you that wasn't a great idea?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music lives here. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. We start the show today with a replenished coffee supply. And? Thanks to Megan's Guild Wars car. And what else? And Megan surprised me with a late birthday gift, a giant catering sales bag of marshmallows.

Sledge likes a little extra marshmallows with his mochaccinos. Do you do marshmallows with the mochaccino at the cafe? I don't know. I don't think so. Because I always like when there's different bits and pieces, like occasionally you might get a little circular biscuit situation. Or, yeah, some places do a little like a hot fudge. No, like a brownie.

Yeah. A cube of brownie. Oh, that's lovely for them, isn't it? I ain't got money for that. Or a little, oh, I remember once someone gave me like a ginger nut, like a hard ginger nut biscotti situation. It wasn't good, I didn't like a ginger nut, like a hard. You can buy a brownie. Like a ginger nut biscotti situation. It wasn't good. I didn't like it.

Yeah, right. Well, no, thank you. Sounds like a magical place, Gilmore's. I know we've talked about this a lot. I, oh, yeah. I almost bought another like massive thing of pickles yesterday. I don't know why the pickles get me every time. It's just like you walk through and you're like, I need that.

No, you don't. I don't. No, it's just an internal struggle. I need a thousand pickles in a giant jar. And I went down the lolly aisle for you. Oh, was that hard? Yeah. What was the best looking

lolly in a large bag? The licorice. Red licorice. Red licorice. And they have like big like party mix bags. Right. But, yeah, you say big party mix bag, my initial thought was that just means more green mint leaves

than ever before. Yeah, true. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. Megan's just given us her bank details for these tins of coffee. Are you marking that up? Or is that the actual... $29.99.

Well, that's what you'll get. I added a cent. $30. It's $29.99. You've got four tins, that's four cents. If you do this a hundred times, you're making a dollar. You'll have 40 cents. Oh, my God. I mean, I bought you... I times, you're making a dollar. You'll have 40 cents. Oh my God.

I mean, I bought you a massive bag of marshmallows, but you're going to begrudge me one cent. It's the principle. Welcome to my friendship with Carl Peter Fletcher. It's the principle of it. You can owe me $29.99. Do you know I love doing that when I owe people money. They're like, oh, you owe me $30 for dinner or whatever.

And I'm always like, $29.99. And then they're like, but you only paid me $29.99. I'm like, it's 0.1 cent. Get over it. It's not 0.1 cent. It's 1 cent. It's the same 1 cent you just made a massive deal about Megan. Yeah.

Charging you. It's the principle of it, isn't it? Principle, yeah. It's the funny thing about principles. That's delivery fee. They can go both you. It's the principle of it, isn't it? Principle, yeah. It's the funny thing about principles. That's delivery fee. One cent delivery fee. Oh, okay.

That's cheap delivery. I'll give you that. All right. Story time. Three news headlines for three stories that I've found online. Vodda, Meghan,

pick one of the following three. Headline one, pay attention in school, kids. Okay. Headline two, drag queen bingo cancelled Yep It's in America

You can imagine why And headline three Neighbours at war What? Oh I've forgotten number one Pay attention in school kids Ironic that you'd forgotten that Because you weren't paying enough attention

That one You want that one For me Oh drag Google drag queens Okay Number one that you'd forgotten that because you weren't paying enough attention. That one. You want that one. For me? Oh, Drake. Google Drake, please. Okay, number one. That's against the rules.

We go now to Lemon Grove, which is a town in San Diego, in California. Okay. A sleepy little town, home to 25,000 people. And a zoo. In the greater San Diego area. Yes, and a zoo. Lovely zoo if you ever go to San Diego. San Diego.

It is. And the 10 News Breaking News Tracker was out and about because it had received a hot news tip. This is what they call their news van. You know, you see those vans outside court in sports events with the big satellites on them. Yep, and it goes up, broke us straight back. Well, the 10 News tracker was hot on this hot piece of news,

which was a tip-off from a news watcher. You can make tips through their news website. Yeah. And they were like, well, we better go and cover this story because it's big. Yeah. And again, a lesson why you should be paying attention in school. It is a mistake that would make your English teacher cringe. Yeah. And again, a lesson why you should be paying attention in school.

It is a mistake that would make your English teacher cringe. A newly painted stop sign in Lemon Grove misspelled to S-T-P-O. A four-letter mistake left Lemon Grove neighbors doing a double take. Went to the mailbox and I looked at the stop sign and I looked down on the ground and I said, that's a four-letter word spelled wrong. A 30-year resident of the neighborhood, Stephen Jones says the typo has been the talk of social media. Yeah, I heard about it on Facebook, so I had to walk down here and take a look at it. A company hired by the city painted the ill-fated sign on Monday. Despite another stop sign just feet away, the new one ended up reading Stepo.

We're told the two employees are experienced, and it was simply human error. That was two minutes, that news story. I edited it down. It's a slow news day. So they completely balls this up. Yeah. STPO.

I'll show you a photo. Stopo. Stopo. Because they use stencils Don't they Because we've done some Remember when we did that car park We did the No they didn't use stencils

Did they not No Do you remember that guy Did it by hand That day we did the car park Oh that's right Because he was old school He thought it was going to be stencils

We were just like This is nuts And he just Floated around It was amazing to see That old boy do it by hand. But I've seen them use stencils, though. I'm pretty sure I have. I think they use stencils for the shh.

No, because he did the triangle, too. I remember he did it by hand. Maybe for the disabled parking. Smaller. Yeah, right. Smaller letters, I think they do. But that one they can do the, yeah, he had it by hand. Pretty amazing.

Amazing. That's why they're quite block lettery, eh, those. Yeah. But you'd think they'd even have it programmable by now. Yeah. Like rather than the stencil, it would just park up and it would do this thing. But you, like I can see how that would happen, but when you step away, you'd be like, oh. Yeah.

Whoopsies. Or unless, you know, you're just so busy because you've got another 10 intersections to do. Yeah, right. Sometimes when I write, I miss out words completely. But I've never scrambled up letters in a word. But everyone knows what that's meant to say. Stoppo. Close enough.

Trying to think of what it could be acronym-wise. Stop. Stop the. The police. It's like Italian. Stop. Stop the. The police. It's like Italian. El stoppo here. El stirpo. Do you just think put an EL in front of it?

Yeah. El stoppo. El stirpo. That would work. Yeah. It could work. God, what a mess. But yeah, slow news day in Lemon Grove.

I love that there's a two minute news story on it. That's my favourite part of the whole thing. Yeah, me too. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. So this is happening in New Zealand schools. Our students are searching porn on New Zealand school networks 300,000 times in one month. In one month.

Now, that's not the word porn. That is anything that would fall under a porn suit. That's like what the school equivalent of net nanny. Yeah, or a net filter. Anything that's not would. I'd imagine there could be things like, things that were violent. No, because it's specifically sex.

It's just porn. Sexual. Wow, okay. Sexual nature. Yeah. It's nuts. This has raised the concern again that we need to have better

and more inclusive sex education in schools. But then, like, isn't it just like people showing off and being silly? That's right. I mean, when you go into an all-boys school. But 300,000 times? Yeah. He's like, heh, boobs.

Because we used to do that in like IT class. We'd be like, ha-ha, teacher's not looking. Like, search something dodgy. Yeah. And I think back then it probably wasn't blocked. And then you're like, ha-ha, and turn it off. But wouldn't it be under your login? or are they just generally logged in these computers? Well, younger, maybe it's like a group situation.

But when you get older, you'd probably have a school log on, wouldn't you? Yeah, for sure. So they can monitor what you're looking at. Or you'd just be able to log on to the Wi-Fi with your iPad or laptop. But it's on school networks. Yeah, but if you were logged onto a Wi-Fi, that would be technically the network. 300,000 times in one month. How many school-aged children do we even have?

There's a few principals doing that. Let's not blame the children entirely. I'd like to think principals would know better about the IT system. Well, how many of them get caught? Oh, Google. That's a good call. I'm just working out. I've got some stats here on how many school-aged children there are in New Zealand.

This was in 2016. There was 800,000. Okay. There was 800,000 school-aged children in New Zealand. So 300,000. Yeah, 300,000. A month. Yeah.

So three months has covered all the kids in New Zealand. Someone won't give up. Someone just keeps trying. Yeah. And that does that. I mean, obviously, the younger end of that bracket probably would have no idea what was going on. But then, sadly, once you get to about the middle part of it,

it's... And you're right. There might be a fair chunk of that that's chalked up to curiosity. Shits and gigs. Well, yeah, no, shits and gigs, but also curiosity as to not being informed, but obviously hearing words that you're like, what does that mean? Yeah. Yeah, I know what that means, dude.

You had a choice. Off to the library at lunchtime, punches it in, searches it. No idea as to, you know, that it's of a sexual nature. Yeah, that's why we need sex education because we don't need our children learning from Pornhub. This is true. We do not need that. But, yeah, they're saying some teachers are, like, ill-equipped

and just not confident enough. But then I feel sorry for the teachers that are quite well-equipped and do it because regardless of how you tackle sex education, there's always, like, parents that try to put a stop to it. Yeah. I remember that at school. Like it wasn't enough during one lot of sex education that this girl wasn't allowed to be in class. Her parents didn't want anybody learning about it because she'd come back to class after being excluded

and would ask questions and we'd all answer. And so the parents were like, no, I don't want anyone, any of these kids learning this. Like, what sort of madness is that? Yeah, I used to remember they'd say that they were doing health class today and whoever had been told that they weren't allowed to sit in, like, children left because they didn't have permission from their parents to be a part of that conversation.

Pregnant at 16? Well, the girl that I'm thinking of got pregnant just out of high school. Like, completely unplanned to, like, a casual boyfriend. Because she hadn't learned about... conversation. Pregnant at 16? The girl that I'm thinking of got pregnant just out of high school. Like completely unplanned to like a casual boyfriend. Because she hadn't learned about... And she hadn't been able to have open conversations with the parents about it. Yeah.

It's pretty crazy. So what you're saying is there should just be a free-for-all on the school computers to search whatever. I don't have the exact answer because as I said very dicey subject. Look, I don't have the exact answer because as I said, very dicey subject. Very, but surely there just needs to be a bit more effort and across the board.

Parents, starts at home, right? They're intrigued regardless. You've got to let them know. I remember being sat down by Ian and Christine and being given the book. Being given the book. I think the order

where do babies come from? Playboy. Dad just gives you a magazine. Are you classing it as a book? No. That didn't have the cover on it, so he didn't know if it was Playboy or not. He got it free from the service station at the end of the month. We sat down and we got given the book and we didn't know.

And then they said, there's this book and there's this video. Watch it. Any questions? Yeah, there was like a video you could get out from the public library. It was like an animated thing for kids. It was like you might be wondering where you came from. And it's like, well and then it walks you through.

It was quite traditional, like it was missionary and stuff. And I mean, don't live under any cloud of ignorance. A lot of us are probably conceived in many different positions. Maybe missionary does it for your mum. I don't know. But then

there was that. So we went through all that and then a few years later we watched What's Happening to My Body which was made by the same people but it was more about puberty. And then after we watched that we again watched Where Do We Come From and kind of put all the pieces together. By watching the original Star Wars and then watching the watched that we again watched Where Do We Come From and kind of like put all the pieces together

by watching the original Star Wars and then watching the prequel afterwards. Yeah, right. You know, yeah, there's a bit more to the story now. It's fleshed out a little bit. And like, yeah, I remember my mum and dad saying

we've got to tell you about this stuff because we were never told by our parents. Yeah. That's so progressive. I don't remember any conversations. They might have happened, but maybe I blocked them out.

But then you grew up in a progressive household and the fact that there was no, like your body was nothing to be ashamed of and nudity was out there and surely if you had questions, you could have asked. Yeah. I don't remember where I learned from.

Probably learned at a very young age at the nudist park. Yeah. After you saw mum and dad on the trampoline after some of went down. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the top six. Stats out say that 60% of cats are overweight.

And 50% of dogs are obese. Ooh, obese. Yeah, that's a hard pill to swallow. Not like all that other stuff you've been swallowing, which apparently you've got no problem with. And your sheep are obese too. Yeah, well, that's a problem. It's not just cats and dogs.

Also horses. Horses are very prone to obesity if they're not getting enough work and getting too many treats. Some 51% of horses in a study of veterinary medicine in America found that 50% of horses were overweight. And of that 50%, 19% were what horses would be classed as obese. Wow. You ever seen a really fat horse? No.

It's actually like, yeah, nah, it's not nice. Because their necks are quite... They're meant to be like, they evolve to be... Yeah, they look funny. Super athletic. But there's some dog breeds that like tend to be fat. And do you know what else? What?

Obesity can even be in pet birds. Really? Look at this fat budgie. Well, your mum. What's your mum? The best thing about this budgie is it's just got a massive gut sign. Oh, my God. It's going to pop out.

Yeah. A fat canary. It's like, Tweet, Tweet, bloody Tweet. Tweet, get us a bloody cracker, mate. For some reason, I think it's because it's gold and it reminds me of an Australian cricket uniform, but it's almost like it's like, Tweet, give us a bloody cracker and a bloody ciggy, will you? Pick us up a twoies. I'll go twoies light though.

I'm trying to watch my weight. They'll have a couple of those crackers though. Rodents also. Apparently hamsters and gerbils are very prone to obesity and people just keep feeding them and they'll just keep eating. Rats can also be obese. Yeah. So I have come up with the top six fad diets to get your pet back on track.

Because we all know fad diets work. They do, yeah. Number six on the list of the top six pet fad diets. The Meowterterranean diet. Good, good. And so your cat can only eat stuff that a cat in the Mediterranean would. So sardines? Sardines, yes.

Sardines. Feta? Small fish or anchovies. Not a lot of feta. Lettuce? Yes, tomato, olives. Yep. You'll have your cat looking like a sexy Italian street cat in no time.

Brilliant. Ow, meow. Ow, meow. It'll be back on track. Brilliant. Ow, meow. Ow, meow. It'll be back on track. It's good, yeah. Number five on the list of the top six diet fads for your pets,

the raw diet. Make your cat feel like a lion again. By only eating like a lion would. Okay. Zebras and such. Hard to come by,

but when you find one, your average cat would probably... It'd last a while. It'd last a while. Get a bit of zebra in the chest freezer. Yeah, sort of an urban scenario. They hunt the zebra

and then after they're finished, the fat budgies come and feed on it like vultures afterwards. That could work. Number four on the list of the top six fad diets for your pets are meowsagenics. This is like isogenics for your cat.

They make a whole lot of mouse smoothies and stuff. Basically deprive themselves of any true nutrition. And at the same time, whatever cat is selling it to them starts making a lot of money through what can only be described as a pyramid scheme. Right, and their other cat friends hide them on Facebook.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because they're like, hey, I'm just, since six months time, I've been promised a brand new Mercedes from this person in Australia who is peddling this shit as well. And when you stop doing it, you're going to put all the weight back on because you're

going to realise all you weren't doing is eating. Number three on the list of the top six diet fads for your pets. Polio. Okay. Like paleo. But for your poured pal, you've got to have a You live how

Their ancestors lived Right Tens of thousands of years ago Before agricultural Eating just nuts Raw meat And doing your 45 Yeah

Pretty much Which brings us nicely On to number two F 35 Oh Good Yep

Yep It's doing all the exercises That their ancient ancestors used to do. Chasing buffalo. Yep. Hunting and stalking through the jungles. Yep. Yeah.

I mean, your dog might not look like a wolf, but inside every dog, there's a little bit of wolf. Well, after a few burpees. Yeah, that's for sure. And then they have to post their workout on Facebook afterwards. They have to, yeah, yeah, yeah. They have to post their heart monitor thing. They call it fur book, actually. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And then they have to post their workout on Facebook. They have to. Yeah. They have to post their heart monitor thing. They call it fur book, actually.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they do. Number one on the list of the top six diet fads for your pets. Katkin's diet. Oh, brilliant. It's like Atkins for your cat. No bread.

No sugar. No fun. Oh, yeah. Cranky. You have a cranky. Yeah, your cat's going to get cranky. It's going to scratch. Oh, yeah. Cranky. You have a cranky. Yeah, your cat's going to get cranky. It's going to scratch the couch a little bit more. Yeah.

It'll be constantly pouring at the door of the pantry to get back out the bickies. The carbs. Bickies. The sweet carbs. I need a bickies. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

So here's the situation as it stands. The place we moved into at the end of last year, it's got this archway. Yeah, it wasn't going to be there. It was going to get taken with, but then it got left behind by the bookies owners. I'm still kind of expecting them to turn up one day and be like, we've got our archway. What do you mean archway? This massive garden arch.

Like you would get married under. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's between the hedges, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's out into the paddock. It's out into the paddock. That's so country. However, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's between the hedges, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's out into the paddock. It's out into the paddock. That's so country. However, there's goats in that paddock.

Yeah. So I just put a gate across at ordinary height, but the goats can jump anything. So now there's a gate on top of a gate, and you can't open it. Right. But when you get it and you need to go in the paddock, you need to go the long way.

So in my head, I've had this project where I wanted to put a tall gate in the archway. Right. So I can open it easily and get out there, and the goats can't get in. head, I've had this project where I wanted to put a tall gate in the archway. Right. So I can open it easily and get out there and the goats can't get in. Yeah, right. Unless they develop the ability to open a gate. Then we're all in trouble. Then we're all in trouble.

We've got bigger things to worry about if they can work that out. So I've just been thinking about it and I asked my dad and he was like, we had a good chat about it and he was going to like get into it. But then he's like really busy and he's on holiday now. And when he gets back, it's carving. He's going to be too busy. I don't want to put extra stress on him. And I thought to myself, grow up. Famous last words.

You can do this. Oh. Can you? So. You famously can't. Famously, when have I not been able to? You couldn't build your deck when you were trying to fix that. Oh, I know. couldn't build your deck. When you were trying to fix that. Oh, decks are different situations.

When you were trying to fix that fan motory thing the other day. What happened to that? Give everyone an update. The electric motor, I smashed it with a hammer. Yeah. The bit that wouldn't come off. I tried everybody's suggestions on everything. Yeah.

Nothing works, so I smashed it with a hammer. And now I've got to. Because you got grumpy, didn't you? It was a little bit of grumpy and a little bit of like, I've just had enough. And so now you have to buy a whole new motor. Not a whole new motor was a little bit of grumpy and a little bit of like, I've just had enough. And so now you have to buy a whole new motor. Not a whole new motor, just the bit I've smashed with a hammer. But I have to get the remaining bit off first.

But I'm going to cut that off. See? You famously can't. So you want to build your own gate. You realise that's... I've done my research. I haven't just blindly... Do you mean YouTube? ...wandered in.

Yep. How to build a gate. I looked at this like step by step. There's this easy guide website and basically like if you're a specialist in something, you put together a guide. It's like and then people like it and I guess that's you get the thrill from

like putting up a good step by step on how to do something. So I've read it and then I was like, but that's not the proportions of the gate I want. So I like did some more reading and I found this other one and the guy was like, if you want to change anything, just make sure if it's going to weigh this much, it's got this many hinges and this type of stuff and blah, blah, blah. Right.

Wait, and blah, blah, blah. And you're going to put hinges on? Yeah, but out of your depth. Gate hinges. Oh, so not like, okay. Not like door hinges. Bedroom door hinges. No, no, those are a bit of skill.

These are like proper farm gate hinges. Right. They've got a name that I can't remember right now, but I bought three of them yesterday. Okay. They look like a little hook. Three of them? I don't want to put two of them on and then down the track it pulls it over.

Does Sade know about your plan to make a gate? Yeah, I've been talking to her about it. But anyway. What did she say about this? She went to get her hair done yesterday and I was like, it's time to strike. Fatal era. So I went out without having lunch.

So the minute I got to the hardwister, I had a headache from not eating. And then I was like, I couldn't make a decision. Not on the weekday, Megan. I feel like they miss out all the trade, the hungry tradies. I know, the tradies are dead when they go for a soster in the week. Tradies love a sauce. Well, any time of day. So I went there and I made some hard decisions,

but I bought some wood. Yeah. And I've got like frame stuff. Had a great chat to the dude in the timber yard. Did you ever go to the timber yard with your dad as a kid? Yeah, all the time. Boring. You sit in the car.

Oh, I thought it was so cool. He could drive your trailer in and then it'd be like, oh, you went too often. Like every weekend. Dad would be pointing and having a chat and then they'd all have a chat. I wasn't allowed out of the car. Oh, really? You sit in the car, yeah.

We sat on the trailer and like got out of the way with the forklift. So you just got some wood, but is it the right wood? Is it outside wood? Is it treated? Yep, Sven's Palings. Okay. Sven's Palings Woods. Did you buy something on your own in the timber yard?

Yep. Wow. I know. I graduated to dad yesterday. Did you buy something on your own in the timber yard? Yep. Wow. I know. I graduated to dad yesterday. That's like grown up shit. Do you know the best part? Because I wore my, remember when I bought expensive Timberland boots and I was like, I'm going to look after these.

I'm not going to wear them. Well, I haven't. Look how worn and torn they are. But anyway, I was wearing them and the guy on the forklift said, man, I love those boots. I was like, yeah, cheers, mate. Is that the demo you're trying to impress? Nah, but I'll take it. I'll take compliments in any form from anybody.

I love it when you two respond to someone who's real blokey. Cheers, mate. So I bought all the bits I'm going to need for the gate and actually I came in under budget from what I was going to cost to get the gate made by somebody, which granted they probably would have done a better job, but then I wouldn't

be able to point it out to people and say, I made that gate. It's two metres tall. You might have to fix the gate when it doesn't work. You can't claim you're under budget yet. I came in under budget. I treated myself to a new power tool, which has blown the budget right out.

How much under budget were you? Well, so... Quite a lot? The gate that I was going to get in that would still need modifications because it wasn't tall enough. So I was going to need to buy, like, a little wooden farm gate and then buy the wood to strap onto the side. Oh, yuck. I know, and it wouldn't have looked right.

So that I was budgeting when I had it all priced up and I got it quite printed out. Yeah. I was budgeting, you know, I was looking at about $400 or $500. $400 for a gate? And all the hanging bits and everything. a quote printed out. Yeah. I was budgeting, you know, I was looking at about four or five hundred bucks. Four or five hundred for a gate? And all the hanging bits and everything.

So when I bought all the bits individually by myself to make my own gate, I came in at like a hundred and sixty. Oh, this is going to be a disaster. I'm coming in on a budget. Yeah. Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na.

You're never coming under budget. You've watched Grand Designs. Yeah. So I decided to celebrate by blowing out completely And buying myself a new Drop saw You don't need a drop

Why do you need a drop saw? Is that one where it goes You pull it down And you can like Set the angles and everything So if you need to cut the wood At the angle And it's got that

Adjustable bench angle But it's also got a miter So I can cut 245s And make a 90 degree joint You don't need this. And you're going to lose your fingers. Hmm. Now that's a fair call.

That's a fair call. I have had a couple of calls. And I worry, can you maybe check with your dad while you're doing this or do you not want to check with your dad? Is this a thing? I want him to,

because he's staying, because they're in China so they're ill communicado. Yeah. And the communist regime doesn't like families communicating. I just don't want to say anything. And then when he comes, I want him to see the gate.

And he'll be like, what happened here? There's this lopsided hanging off. What happened here, mate? What the hell's happened here? And I'll be like, Dad, help me. I tried and I failed. Or it works. And he's like, what happened here?

And I put a gate up. And he'll be like, all by yourself. Because, you know, weirdly I'm still striving to make my dad proud of me. And he'll be like, good work. And I'll be like, cheers, mate. Yeah, right.

Okay. And then if it's a failure, just chuck it, just burn it and then just start again. Yeah, like that's not that much of an expensive fire, really.

But boy, did I get in trouble when Sade's like, heard me playing on the saw and she came in and she's like, that's me. Heard you playing on the saw.

Screwing off the ends of the wood I bought, Megan. Testing the saw. She came in and she said, that's new because that's yellow. Because by the way, I'm trying to collect all of the same power tool in yellow. Because I got one and it had a battery pack. DeWalt. So I want all of the DeWalt because the battery fits on all of them. And if DeWalt's listening and want to send me the rest of the Pokemon that I don't have yet,

I'm okay with that. They do like a radio that's also like, go on, heaps of things. Well, the radio also, they've got a radio that charges the batteries. So you plug the radio in the mains and it also charges the batteries while you're listening to the bloody The Rock or something. I don't know. So, God, imagine if XZM tuned in on a bloody tradie radio. I'd be proud to hear some Katy Perry

coming out of a construction site, actually. What about this chat, though? They'd love this. So, she comes in, she's like, that's new, isn't it? And I almost pulled the,

no, I've had this for ages, which is what she pulls to me all the time when she comes out in a bloody Jacoba thing. And I said, yeah. And she's like, how much was that? And I told her and she was like, Vaughan Smith and turned around and walked inside. I was like, I'm in trouble.

It's me and you now, Saw. She's just banking that up in her head for future purchases. And the Saw was, she doesn't need all of her fingers. And I was like, saw? Don't talk like that. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. This has come to us from Mumsnet.

Oh, there's always great stuff on Mumsnet. Mumsnet, where you thought you'd get support but you've been set upon. Mumsnet. By the world. You thought you were doing great and someone tells you you're not. Mumsnet. Yeah. So someone has said that thought you were doing great and someone tells you you're not. Mum's that. Yeah. So someone has said that they were going to visit a friend

in Italy for a week holiday. Yeah. Shall I read you the post? Old friend and godmother to my... What's DD? They always use these... Darling daughter? Oh, darling...

How do you know that? Good work. They use these acronyms and I get lost sometimes. It is Darling Daughter, you're right. We arranged in January to visit her and her hubby who live in southern Italy with our two darling children. Right.

DC. I'm learning as we go. Okay. We are staying five nights. Remember that? Yeah. We spoke to make final arrangements and she has asked us to pay her 800 pounds plus food

for the stay. That equates to about just over 1,500 New Zealand dollars. So she's staying with her friends and now the friends are saying that'll be $1,500. Yeah. I blame Airbnb for this. Everyone's like, oh, they know how much money they can make with their house now. So yeah, they're paying to fly over there and everything. Yeah. And it sounds like they're paying to fly over there and everything.

And it sounds like they're pretty good friends. They're godmother to her daughter. I think because it sounds like they don't want her to stay. This is something I'd call if I didn't want my friends to stay. Give them a bill. Yeah, she's put this on mum's net. And that's pretty much what everyone has said. It's beyond cheeky. It sounds like this person is trying to give you the hint

that they don't want you to stay with them and most people are agreeing that it is pretty on the nose but then there are some who say that they have agreements with their friends that if they come and stay they pay a certain amount for how long they're there oh is that weird if you're only there a few days

and no longer than a week, Five days. You wouldn't charge them. $1,500 for five days. That's crazy. $300 a day. You could easily get an Airbnb.

You could get a nice Airbnb for that. Yeah. Easily. Probably have a bit more room and not be in their face, but that's totally what she wants them to do.

Oh, exactly. Yeah. You'd think so. Yeah. I'm going to remember that next time someone comes and them to do. Oh, exactly, yeah. You'd think so. Yeah. I'm going to remember that next time someone comes and stays with me. But also,

does it say what sort of accommodation this friend has? Like, are they taking up her Airbnb? So this would be costing her money in peak season.

But that doesn't matter, does it? But if it's in peak season and it's a reliable income, you'd almost just be so booked out. But they're still your friend. Like,

you want to see them, don't you? Well, you'd be questioning that. Yeah, I don't think that relationship's going to survive. So we've already learnt that humans are already developing what they're calling like horns on the base of your skull, right? And it's like a little added bone that's growing. Because we're hunching. Because we're looking down at our phones and tablets

and computers and everything. What would the benefit of horns be from continually somebody hanging on a hook for us? No, it must be growing because your skull needs extra support or something. Right. So that's already happening, but there has been an article that's been released that says...

But is that legit? That feels like something that would happen over many generations. The horn thing. It's not just going to happen like that. The horns. Yeah. Yeah, but they've already got like x-rays of it happening. And so what was stopping it growing before?

The fact that we were all looking up a little bit. Standing upright. Right. Because they've been saying for years we're going to have... Smartphones aren't making millennials grow horns. Here's how to spot a bad study with no scientific backing. Good, so that's not happening. Well, this one says scientists, so I'm going to believe it.

Okay. This has done a report on what humans will look like in 2100. Which isn't that far away in the scale of human history. 81. Not enough for us to evolve like something major like horns. Because they've been saying we're meant to have padded tennis bat sized thumbs from all of our texting and button pushing.

Yeah, because in the past, like 100 years ago, humans would have been doing something that we don't do now. And we hadn't evolved that much like to change our body shape and everything. So they are saying that our posture will have us hunched over so we will essentially have a hunched back. Like a flinch straightened up a spine

when you said that it's like not me. Not me. Not today Satan. Not me. No but that is a problem because I had a pinched nerve like last year. And it's from just constantly being hunched over, looking at screens, slouching on the couch.

Yeah. Everything. Yeah, and you. I had that back thing that pulled me up straight. That was so good. I don't know what I've done with that. I lost that. The back brace?

But that was good. You're not supposed to wear it all the time. It was supposed to be a training thing. But I just left it on lots because it just felt good. Just straightened you out. Yeah. So a hunched back and our neck will be leaned over and much thicker. A bigger, thicker neck to hold our hunch over.

That's great. I've always wanted to play rugby. Yeah, it'll make you look like a front rower. Yeah. You'll get those ears and you'll be sorted. We'll have a text claw, so I don't know what that means. In 81 years, we're not going to change diddly. So, I mean, it's not going to change your, you're still going to have hands.

It just means your fingers are going to be curved over. I wonder if they had this sort of panic back in the 1800s when they're like, what are humans going to look like? Because we're all taking our steam-powered automobiles and bicycles everywhere now. So this is the one you're going to hate. They are saying that people may develop a double eyelid to protect their eyes from harmful light.

No, not happening. Not in 80 years. If we were going to evolve that, we would have evolved it already the minute we invented light to see at night. That happened over 80 years ago. We'd have it by now. But what about blue light? You're talking rubbish. I won't listen to it.

What about blue light? Just light in general. A light that would be like, second eyelid. No. Imagine how great that would be for afternoon naps if we had second eyelids. Because I imagine it would be like having two sets of roller blinds. A thermal curtain and a sun blind. It would be great. Pure darkness.

Not for me. I'm scared of the dark. If I'm going to shut my eyes, I'd be terrified. Fletchborn and Megan's Community Notices Kia ora and welcome to Kia ora and welcome to Tēnākwe

and welcome to Community Notices this is a segment of the show where we pop around the country having a look at what's happening on different Facebook pages to get a barometer for the nation great tap the barometer in the lounge

is a storm coming? Carolyn posts on the Safer Fielding and distress community board, there's this dog in Lytton Street. It's a white dog. It's always out roaming and I'm sick of it. I live around the corner and it comes to my house when it needs a turd.

It's pooing on my backyard. There's dog poo everywhere. The owners don't care. I don't own the bloody dog. My lawn's covered in poo. I'm going to start throwing the poo at the dog. I don't know if that's how dogs work, but okay. Sounds like a good idea to me. This one from the poo at the dog. I don't know if that's how dogs work, but okay.

Sounds like a good idea to me. This one from the Rolleston community page. Subway Rolleston, what a rude manager you have. I buy my salad there at least twice a week. The button doesn't work for the staff on the machine, so they have the problem every time I order the Veggie Delight salad. Staff have said that the manager knows order the Veggie Delight salad. Staff have said that the manager knows

about this problem and has done nothing. Well, this evening, the manager was there, so I hit them up about it and they were rude. She says, yeah, I know about it. And I said, well, fix it.

And she said, why? I won't be going back. Oh, my God. So they get a Veggie Delight salad, the button doesn't work for it, but they managed to somehow process it. Yeah, yeah. So they get a veggie diet salad, the button doesn't work for it, but they managed to somehow process it.

Yeah, yeah. What's the problem? Yeah, there's no problem. There's no problem, right? I'm frustrated that every time they tell

her the button doesn't work. Yeah, oh, that button doesn't work, but we can make this happen. What? What's the ish?

What's the ish? So anyway, let's pop from there up to the Papakura buy, sell and Exchange page where somebody writes, so this lovely couple decided that my wallet was better in their position than mine. I went to the takeaways and accidentally left my wallet beside where I was sitting.

Yeah. And I believe now it's homesick and it would like to come home. These two caught on security camera at the takeaways. Here's the video of them finding my wallet and then using my money to buy their food. Oh, that's rough. It's got my licence, all my credit cards and everything in it. Yeah.

So they'll be able to get a hold of me. So if you recognise this couple, please tell them that I want it back. There's screenshots. I'd rather just deal with this and get it back than take it to the police, but I will take it to the police. Well, the perps themselves

commented on the photos. Hey, mate, we're not a couple. That's my 17-year-old son and me. But wait, they're not denying it. I guess this gets better. There's more, there's more. You make it sound in this post as if we stole your wallet. Well, the truth is we just found it sitting there.

My son grabbed it, and as I was about to finish ordering, he had two choices. Does he give it to the shop owners or keep it? And yes, he kept it. He kept your $125 notes and the $2 coin. And no, he never tries to use your card, so don't you dare accuse us of that. He threw the rest in the rubbish.

Oh, my God! And no, we didn't pay for your meal with our money. We didn't pay for our meal with your money. We took it home. You do have to do one thing. I do have a kind soul soul and so does my son. You'll remember this is the person who two sentences ago said, we didn't take your cards, we threw them in the bin and stole the money.

You've got to be taking the mickey. Yeah. So message me and we'll go from there. I don't know what they could possibly want. What the hell? Anyone I saw commenting on this saying anything other than that we're good people. Bizarre morals. You're not a good person. No, you

sanctioned your son stealing $125 in cash and binning any connection to it. Multiple bad decisions. But they won't F you if you're going to say a bad word about them on this post. What is wrong with them? Really like confusing

moral ground, eh? Yeah. Because we didn't steal your wallet, we found it but then we proceeded to take everything inside it, pocket anything with any value to us

and bin the rest but we're not bad people. And we didn't use your credit cards. We could have. Yeah, your fault for leaving it behind. I mean, we could have

handed it in but we didn't. We could have used your credit card on PayWave but we didn't because we're good people apart from the fact we stole your money. I would be so, like, up till then,

I would have been like, okay, they could have, they've had the chance to give my wallet back. Yeah. I would have gone to the police. Well, now they've literally got evidence of this. I know. It's getting to it.

They've got visual. I'd do them. I'd take them to the police. Nuts. And they're probably too busy. I'm joking. Well, you're actually literally providing them everything that they need. Yeah. Let's go to anything? No, I'm joking. Well, you're actually literally providing them everything that they need.

Yeah. Let's go to the Hallswell Community Group where Samantha says, Hi, friends. My do-do. My do-do. My do-do. My do-do. My do-do.

My do-do. Finger peppy. My do-do. My do-do. Finger peppy. My daughter will be turning 18 this month. It's a special birthday as we're South African immigrants. Oh, okay.

I mean, 18 is kind of special. Universally, it's a special birthday, right? Yep. 18th, 21st, 40th. You can do all those things, can't you, when you're South African immigrants. Oh, okay. I mean, 18 is kind of special. Universally, it's a special birthday, right? Yep. 18th, 21st, 40th. You can do all those things, can't you, when you're 18? Yeah. I was wondering if anybody could suggest or assist in a radical surprise. I was thinking it'd be lovely to get to a ride in a police car to school.

Without, of course, disrupting the duties of police officers. Any ideas would be much appreciated. That's not a good idea. I don't think an 18-year-old wants to ride in a police car to school. Alan proposes you do what every Kiwi family does and just let them loose in the town bar, and if they're lucky enough, they might get a ride home in a police car that night as well.

Good suggestion, Alan. There'd be many that have. No, I can't even. No, if I'm on the fence about reading it, I don't know. Do you want to go over, Megan, and have a little check? Because I feel like you, if Ford is on the fence, we probably won't read it, to be honest. Ah! Not, no!

Weird thing to go public with, though, eh? Weird question to go public with. Oh, but now I want to know. Like, ask your friends. I don't even know if I could to go public with. Oh, but now I want to know. Like, ask your friends. I don't even know if I could really ask my friends. Oh, okay. Well, if you see anything bizarre, unusual, funny on your local Facebook

community page, screenshot it, send it to us. FVM on ZM. What a great podcast so far, wouldn't you agree, Fletch? Yes. And it's all thanks to Spark. Get one gig of bonus data with the Spark U25 pack. Now, back to the podcast.

I love this story. So, the Hawke's Bay school rugby team, you may have heard about it, they pushed to let a girl play in their first 15. So, her name was Briar. She is 11 years old and she was told she couldn't play in the I couldn't even get

into the 5th 15 rugby team that's how rubbish I was at rugby she was 11 and I know in the first this is great

to be commended look at a future Blackfern yeah in Havelock North the intermediates first 15 so she was told

she couldn't play in the team and she and her dad were really gutted about it she was told she could only play in the team And she and her dad were really gutted about it She was told she could only play in the girls' sevens team So everyone weighed in on this Even the sports minister said that she should be allowed to play Eventually, and this is great news She was allowed to play with the first 15 in their tournament

It was called the Super 6 tournament She was allowed to play but they had to forfeit any points they scored first 15 in their tournament. It was called the Super 6 tournament. She was allowed to play but they had to forfeit any points they scored. That's ridiculous, isn't it? Yeah. I mean, it's great that she could play but ridiculous. And it's nice that the team all decided that that's the stance they wanted to take. They would rather be

inclusive of her. Intermediate age, that's pretty massive. That's awesome. Yeah, it is. To put that sort of sportspersonship ahead of points and stuff because he's really competitive at that,

especially if it's a first 15. So they lost all their games, but I think something better came from this. Okay. Inclusiveness. And they also got

a personal email from the Prime Minister. So Jacinda Ardern sent them an email and she said, I just wanted to send you a quick note to wish you the best of luck for the Super 6 tournament today. So she did it beforehand. I've read about your story in the paper and your actions really impressed me. I think it's great that you've chosen to play together as a team, even though you're forfeiting your points by doing so.

Briar, I know what it's like to be told you can't do something. Never in sports, though. I was useless at that. And unfortunately, that's a message girls in particular get told too often. I prefer to think that girls can do anything, and I'm glad your school and teammates think the same. All the best for the tournament. And just know that even if you're not successful on the field today,

you've already won simply by running on. Enough to warm the hearts of even some young Nats. That story, beautiful. Is it though? Famously cold hearts. Famously cold hearts. Beautiful, nice words. The whole story is quite beautiful.

That's got quite a nice ending. But then another story that I read about yesterday is a young guy called Braden. He likes playing netball. He lives in Gisborne. He just wants to play netball. Was this on Fair Goal? It was on Fair Goal or something, was it?

Yeah. He can't play in the netball anymore because he's over 12, and apparently the governing body of New Zealand netball regulation says that boys can be discriminated against in female leagues when they get over 12 because of their strength, stamina and ability. Right. It goes up. Well, this is a weak question for equality, isn't it? Yeah.

And he's like, I don't want to play rugby. He's a year older than Briar. 14. Oh, he's 14. Yeah, he's 14. Right. But he's like, I don't want to play rugby. Yeah. Oh, he's 14. Yeah, he's 14. Right. But he's like, I don't want to play rugby.

Yeah. What are my other choices? This is the game, I quite like the speed and everything of it. Yeah. So yeah, he's not allowed to play so he's taken up bowls.

Bowls for the winter. He sounds like my sort of guy. He sounds like my type. I hope he gets a couple of $3 handles with the old lads afterwards. They're like,

how old are you? He's like, yeah, I just pour us another bloody Lion Red and shut your trap, Trev. I'm a bloody great Spain member. Producers of an R-rated burlesque show have said it's advertisers are 16. That means that you can't bring your children and will have to ask them to leave if you continue to bring them along.

Apparently, this is a bit of a problem. So what sort of bootleg shows, just like skimpy? There's not a lot of... Yeah, like skimpy outfits and like erotic dancing. And the humour, if there's humour involved, it's always very adult-themed humour. Risqué. Lots of, as they said, F-bombs from the top of the show,

spicy language. How old were the kids that were going? Well, I don't know, but under 16. Yeah, so I went to a burlesque show recently and there was

people under the age of 16. And you wouldn't have thought appropriate? Oh, nah. But yeah, I mean, it's just spicy language and it depends on how woke your kids are,

I guess. You're going to know better than anyone else, but I wouldn't. They said it's just spicy language and it depends on how woke your kids are, I guess. You're going to know better than anyone else, but I wouldn't. They said it's not all. If they were to put a percentage on it, about 20% of the entire show would be inappropriate for those under 16. Yeah. And they've been kind of shocked at the amount of people that have been bringing their kids to a burlesque show. Not that the human body is anything to be ashamed of, but there's some things reserved for adult passage, right?

The one that you saw, Megan, what would you have needed to explain to like a nine-year-old? I mean, they'd probably figure it all out. Lots of colourful language, but they do like simulation of sexual positions. There's lots of like gesturing.

Yeah, like rude jokes and stuff. Yeah, right. Nipple tassels. Yeah, there was nipple tassels. Gesturing. It's not a burlesque. Oh, lots of butts. Lots of butts.

Not a burlesque show without nipple tassels. Yeah. You'd want your money back. Yeah. If you went and there weren't nipple tassels. But we were wondering this morning if anybody listening, if your parents ever took you somewhere that would be, like, looking back on it, inappropriate for children.

Just the pub? Or the car? The Kiwi classic? 80s and 70s and 80s in New Zealand, right? You'd just go to the pub with your parents. I mean, you could still go to the pub with your parents, but it depends. Are they having, like, a couple of drinks and a meal,

or are they, like, getting on it? Yeah. Now they just leave you in the car, don't they? Yeah. In the car park. Yeah. Well, hopefully not. I'm 37.

I should be allowed to go in and enjoy a drink with my dad. Dad, you've got to stop leaving me in the car. Did your parents, how old were you when your parents took you to the nudist park? Like five that I can remember from when I was real young. But then like that just is like naked bodies. Like that's all right. Yeah, true.

And you get used to it. Yeah, yeah, because you're all born naked. So naked doesn't have an age limit, does it? It's not inappropriate. You get used to just seeing everything hang out. Seems weirder now. Yeah, you go to a burlesque show, you're like, boring! Take me back to the nudist park.

Boy, you guys need to come to the nudist park. Ain't no nipple tassels there, boring. But there ain't no teasing at the nudist park. No. In your face. Yeah, you just mow the lawns nude. Yeah, yeah. Just doing everything you usually do but with no clothes on.

Because would nipple tassels be frowned upon at the nudist park? Because that's technically covering up, isn't it? They were the original freer of the nipple. Right, yeah, the nudist park. I don't know, I think people would be all right. But they'd be like, what have you got those on for? What are you hiding? For nipples, literally.

Okay, 0800-DARZEDM, give us a call. You can text 9696. Where did your parents take you when you were a kid that was inappropriate? Maybe it was a show. Maybe it was a temporary babysitter. You just had to go somewhere. Sit in the corner. Yep. And watch. Learn and listen. Give us a call.

So whereabouts did your parents take you that was a little inappropriate? Jess? So I was about 11 years old and they took me to Bull Rat. Very nice. Very nice. That was a prop rap. Did it go smoothly the whole way through or like halfway through

where they're like, we've made a mistake? I think I was just very confused the whole time. I thought something was off because there were like a lot of adults going into this movie and I was like, okay, something's not right here. Was there any weird conversation on the way home? No, it was a pretty silent ride home, to be honest. I'm just trying to think, was there nudity in that movie? Yes.

Was there a bit of pain? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, quite a bit of it. And didn't they wrestle in the back of that? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Okay, just getting some the back of that? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow.

Okay, he's getting some flashbacks of that movie. Quite an experience for an 11-year-old, Jess. It was something. Have you turned out all right, though? Are you morally corrupt or something now? I mean, I hope not. Okay. Sounds great.

You sound perfectly fine. Jess, thanks for your call. Ellie, where did your parents take you? So I went along with my mother to Love Actually when I was about seven years old, which I think she thought would be like a lovely mother-daughter event. But it turned out there was lots of fake porn scenes and whatnot. Well, yes, that's right.

Everyone always forgets about that story from Love Actually. It is a beautiful movie, but there's that one storyline that's a little bit... Made worse by the fact that she was my school principal and there were other parents there wondering why she'd taken her seven-year-old. Yes. Yeah, that'll get some questions. So good. So did you have any questions at the end of that movie

or did you just embarrassingly keep it to yourself? Well, she kept pushing me down behind the back of the seats every time there was a scene that was inappropriate, so I can't really recall it. Brilliant. And every Christmas when TV2 plays out, it's ruined for you. Thanks, you call Ali. Well, not the only movie situation.

When we were 9 and 11, my family, my mum and dad said we could go see Scooby-Doo at the movies. So we paid. But then when we got to splitting two ways, to go into cinema to the right or cinema to the left, we went left when we should have gone right and ended up watching a good chunk of the Josh Hartnett movie, 40 Days, 40 Nights.

Oh, okay. That's where he swears off any sort of sex for 40 Days, 40 Nights. Lots of... They said, until we got a flashlight in our face from the attendant, being like, what are you doing in here? This is a restricted film And then we were escorted To see the last half an hour

Of Scooby Doo Just googled him Because whatever happened to him It's just Been cast in a new A CSI thingy Yeah Some new TV show

And he was in Penny Dreadful Dreadful Dreadful Penny Dreadnought Penny Oh right Something like that

Okay Still an attractive man still got great eyebrows he does have good eyebrows he's got a little goatee though now you're not a fan of the goatee

clean shaven clean shaven harney or like full beard one or the other no he always looked good with the little moustache did you see the goatee

no I'm on board it'd be horrible being a heartthrob and then ageing because everyone would have an opinion because I was about

to say something and I was like like, no, that's mean. That's not going to help. Yeah, no, it's not. It's not. You're right, though. Still an attractive man. Good on you. And some other places.

I got taken to a full moon party in Thailand when I was eight. I don't think my parents quite knew what the full moon party was. Why are you celebrating the moon? What could go wrong? My dad took 11-year-old me to Dracula's on the Gold Coast. Very awkward sitting eating dinner with my dad, watching a giant penis dance across the stage. That's my explaining.

Lots of people who were lucky enough to tour around Europe as kids, but Amsterdam was just sort of a minefield of red light districts and people smoking weed at the time. They said so, lots of people there. Somebody went to the, they thought their parents looked up museums when they were in London and actually ended up going to like this horrific museum that told all the bad stories about London's

history like Jack the Ripper and the torture in the London Tower and they said it really, really terrified them for a long time. How's about people messaging in and that they went to Thai, the Thai shows? Yeah, the ping pong shows. And their parents claimed, went in, started, they left immediately and their parents claimed they had absolutely no idea.

How do you know? When I was 10 years old, my dad took me to the Bloodhound Gang concert. Lead singer dropped his pants in the first song. It was the first time I saw a grown man with his pants down. Absolutely shocked. Wow. Dad must have known that the Bloodhound Gang concert wasn't going to be a walk in the park.

Well, yeah, they loved a bit of controversy, didn't they? Now, when we get home, tell your mother that they sung Nice and Wholesome. And somebody else said, my dad was a volunteer firefighter. I was always so excited to go with him, but obviously I could go with him to the station. Yeah. But then I just hung out at the station. A six-year-old left alone in a volunteer fire station

while everybody else went and fought fires. I just hung out and ate chips and tried on fireman outfits. All good. That would be pretty legit when you're six. I mean, looking back on it, probably not now, but at the time, good fun. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, intern Anya, yesterday after the show we were talking

because you've come back from your Europe trip, a little bit tired. Yeah. And, you know, because you're on the opposite times, opposite ends of the day, aren't you? You just get over there, you have a couple of weeks or a month and then you come back and you're used to sleeping different patterns. Yeah. So I've been getting like three hours sleep a night,

which has been a hoot and a half. But yeah, first world problems. Can't really complain too much, can you? I've got to go to Europe now. I can't sleep. It's so jet lagged. You're sorry for me. Well, this is how the conversation is because we started ragging on you yesterday.

I'm just on Europe time zone. Did I tell you guys I went to Europe? I just went to Europe. My brain thinks I'm still in Paris. Yeah. Were you just about to eat your breakfast? I've been eating it this whole time. We're on air.

Yeah, I'm a professional. I'm a relatable real guy, all right? He chews when we're talking, swallows and then seizes a bit. And then say, my bad, people would never have known. Let's carry on. No one will notice. No, they will now because we'll leave you. Is that hot banana and porridge?

Yep. See, you can't talk. You can't talk when needed. He just said yes. I answered a question. Yep. That's a good thing about porridge and a mushy hot banana and porridge. Yep. See, you can't talk. You can't talk when needed. He just said yes. I answered her question. That's a good thing about porridge and a mushy hot banana. I shouldn't have said anything

because now you're going to make a thing out of it. Are you anti-hot fruit? Yeah, I'm the same with James. I don't like it. I'm not down for it. Oh, I'm all about hot fruit. So yesterday, internet is like,

I'm having problems sleeping. Oh, woe is me. I went to Europe and I said, well, that's why you've got to get a couple of sleeping pills. And I'm not really forced. I use them when I travel for long flights because it's great to knock yourself out. But, you know, I wouldn't want to get addicted to them.

You've got a healthier relationship with sleeping pills. Yeah. Yeah. Whereas some people, I guess they have problems sleeping, so they use them quite a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That scares me getting addicted to something like that. So I'm not, don't try to take too many. Probably why you wouldn't get addicted to something

is you're very well aware of. Yeah. But in Ternania, I said, well, you have sleeping pills for your travel. Just take one or two for the first few nights. And this is when in Ternania he says to me, I did take sleeping pills last night. And you got three hours sleep after taking

one and a half sleeping pills. Yeah. Now, let's just rewind and remember when Vaughn accidentally took two pills and doesn't remember. And then accidentally drank six Singapore slings. Yeah. And doesn't remember getting home. I don't even remember clearing customs.

I don't even remember there being a plane. I woke up at home and I said to Sade, how did I get here? You took off ahead of us and we did not know what happened to you. I'm so proud of my body's survival instinct. Like I was like, but the brain was like, I don't know guys, I'm not going to make it. And the legs were like, hold on. Also on a serious note,

I will point out that you are not meant to take alcohol with sleeping pills and it is not recommended. No, I had no idea. But this is when I learned. That was silly. I said, what is wrong with you? Because these are your standard prescription sleeping pills. And Magoo's over here with her medical knowledge said,

maybe she is affected because she's got red hair. And I had no idea. You need more than the average person. Or they don't work as much on you. Well, I need 20% more anesthetic because I'm a ginge. Correct. Yeah. I had no idea. It takes more anaesthetic to put redheads under. Redheads, gingers needed more. That's

mind-blowing. There you go. And their pain tolerance is different to ours. I'm real tough. Yeah. Really, really tough. But it varies, doesn't it? Emotionally, like, how's the teasing? No, just physically. Teasing's still the same as us? Yeah. Okay. You're more sensitive to pain, though, aren't you? No, I'm tougher.

I thought you were more sensitive to pain, but it took more to knock you out. Did gingers always win UFC? Redheads need 20% more anaesthesia than their dark-headed counterparts because the MC1R gene belongs to the same family of genes that play a role in pain. The mutation causes redheads to be more

sensitive to it. So you're more sensitive to pain. That's a double whammy because it's like we're going to put you under so you don't feel pain but you feel pain more easily and we're going to need to give you more to knock you out. But does that mean you would need a higher dose of... Well, I'm not

a doctor so I wouldn't comment on that. Isn't your sister a doctor? Can't you just ask her? Are you allowed to give your family pills? Probably not. No, you cannot. No, that's a hard no. But when I Google it, there's all these really stressful questions like am I going to lead a shorter life?

Where do they come from? Where do they come from? Well, you're not a pug. You're not a pug, Rob. Stop looking at those questions. This one says you're not a pug You're not a pug dog Stop looking at those questions This one says you're a human unicorn Guys we're going extinct Oh you haven't heard that for a while Maybe that's why it means you're a unicorn

That and Gary, people with the name Gary If you're a ginger called Gary You're a very weird human You're a true human unicorn To me, you getting three hours after taking a sleep I can get knocked out on a plane for like six or seven hours and just all of a sudden wake up and it's seven hours later. I'm like, yes.

No, I took them on both the flights as well and they didn't do anything. Like I'd fall asleep for about half an hour and then I'd wake up again. Wow. That's crazy. I know. So what is your... Okay, I've found a New York Post article about gingers being superheroes. This is why.

They don't need as much vitamin D. Thanks to the higher concentrations of red hair and pale skin from cloudy European environments where they kind of evolved and developed, you can create your own vitamin D from far less sunlight. So you don't need as much sun to have the vitamin D, so you're not going to get rickets. No, you're a vitamin D producing machine.

Thank you. It's the nicest thing you've ever said to me. You're welcome. Red-headed woman can handle pain better. There you go. Red-headed woman can handle up to 25% more pain than people with other hair colours. Yeah, because my laser lady always says like,

oh, you're doing really well. And I'm like, yeah. Have you even started? Tears rolling down my face. Like, turn it right up. But you need more painkillers. You know when it's going to get cold, apparently. You're like a thermometer.

I feel in your boobs. You feel hot and cold temperatures more severely than anyone else. The University of Louisville discovered this hidden gift and hypothesised that it's to do with this gene, MC1R. It can cause human temperature to be detected. So you should be a weather person. I am, Megan.

Yeah, she says that best tasting Mexican food and does the weather all around the country every day. I definitely hear that. Oh my god. It does play a couple of times every hour every day. I definitely hear that. Oh my god. It does play a couple of times every hour, every day, Megan. Redheads are also

perceived as being funnier without actually having to do anything. Oh, yeah boy. And your per head of population, you're more popular in commercials. What does that mean? So, redheads are over represented in TV commercials.

Oh, okay. I get a ginge in there, but they make up some 30% of people on TV commercials, but only 2% of the world's population. When I was like eight, I really wanted to be in commercials, and I got an agent, and I never got a commercial. So I feel like this is not accurate. What a crush to your eight-year-old ego. I know.

Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. This is something we've spoken about many times and we get affected by this a lot. Or everyone I know, this happens to. You're like, Instagram is listening to me and Facebook or one of them or both of them because you'll get advertising that you have not even thought about or looked up or anything.

You might have spoken in a conversation about it and suddenly you're getting targeted ads for spouting. Now we tested this several times on the show at the start of the year. We were Jan Feb.

Yeah. With a segment, shh, they're listening. Yeah. And we did this several times. We had... Bathroom renovations. Yeah, we talked about

specific things and we mentioned keywords over and over again and we asked you to have your phone open and near the radio. And the stories we heard back over the next 24 hours of people that had all this targeted advertising for bathroom renovations or spouting

or weird stuff that you'd never talk about was unreal. It was a thing. Because we, yeah, we talked about gutters and spouting. Yeah. I have no reason to even speak about that

or look up or anything. And then suddenly you have ads for it. And all the time. Explain that. It happened to you the other day. We were talking about something

and then an ad popped up. people got in contact with us and said that it's not necessarily the social media, it's the phone operators. It's your series and when you allow voice activation, it's the phone operators. It's your series. And when you allow voice activation, it's the phones and the operating systems. But of course, they sell all their advertising.

And then there's Google. Information to Google and all that. But someone's listening and no one's owning up to it. So the head of Instagram, his name is Adam. He sat down with Gayle King. Yes, Oprah's Gayle. Fletch is very confused. It is Oprah'sle King. Yes, Oprah's Gayle. Fleetch is very confused. It is Oprah's Gayle.

One of Oprah's BFF Gayle. It is. Okay. She's also the host of CBS this morning. Yeah. So she sat down with the head of Instagram and straight up asked them if they're listening. Can you help me understand how I can be having

a private conversation with someone about something I'm interested in and an advertisement for that will pop up on my Instagram feed? I haven't searched for it. I can be having a private conversation with someone about something I'm interested in, and an advertisement for that will pop up on my Instagram feed. I haven't searched for it. I haven't talked to anybody about it. I swear I think you guys are listening. I know you're going to say you're not. I get this question all the time. Then tell me how it happens. How does it happen? There's two ways that can happen one is dumb luck which can happen the second is repeatedly but go ahead repeatedly the second is you might be talking about something

because it's top of mind because you've been interacting with that type of content more recently i think this kind of happens often in ways that are really subtle but we don't look at your messages you don't listen on your microphone. But I recognize that you're not going to really believe me on this. No, I get this once a week. I don't believe you. I don't know how this happens repeatedly. I don't know how to convince you. Okay, does it happen to you?

No. I'm sure. I don't want to just say no. I'm sure it's happened. I can't think of a good example, though. I get pretty good ads. No, I don't believe him. Oh, poor dumb luck that I got ads about gutters. That's not dumb luck. I like that this chat's just going to lead everyone back into the gutter chat.

The gutter on target advertising. Yeah, later today. Fact of the day day day day day Today's fact of the day is an interesting fact about Subaru Subaru Subaru Subaru's success in America

is thanks to... Jesus. Not Jesus. Not Jesus. That was good from you. Didn't drive a Subaru. You don't know. I don't know.

Why should I? You point it at... Obama. Not Obama. Is it a singular person? Pre-Obama. No, it's a group of people. Is it someone that used it in an ad or a song or a band?

Lesbians. Oh, I wouldn't have. Today's fact of the day is Subaru's success in America is all thanks to lesbians. And also, and to be honest, Subaru's progressive thoughts on advertising in the 1990s. But really, okay. So they were doing some focus groups and stuff in America about who owns Subarus and what do we know about them. And they came up with, there were five groups, teachers and educators, healthcare professionals, IT professionals, outdoors types, and lesbians.

Why were lesbians drawn to the Subarus? Well, for many reasons, thank you for asking. They felt that because they were all-wheel drive cars, they said that all-wheel drive... Lesbians love beach picnics. They love outdoor activities. And that sounds really stereotypical, but the lesbians asked said that that's why they liked an all-wheel drive car.

And they also liked an all-wheel drive car that wasn't massive. They didn't want it to be huge and ridiculous. A big SUV. They wanted a practical size car that had an all-wheel drive option. There was other reasons they liked them. They said that they weren't like bulky or ugly. They kind of had nice smooth lines. And just because they wanted something that could be practical and get places,

they didn't want it to be ugly and boxy and they didn't want it to be huge. So apparently this was quite a thing. Sabari were like, well, we can make a thing out of this. Okay. Or we can just sit quietly about it. Apparently it was all thanks to a Canadian who said, yeah, like what's the big deal? Even though America at the time was still like, gay rights was well behind.

Yeah. There was the don't ask, don't tell. 1996, there was a thing passed under Bill Clinton to say the Protection of Marriage Act. Right. Meant that marriage was between a man and a woman, has since a few states have changed it at a state level. But, you know, as a country, it was that at the time.

So Subaru started subtly advertising and it became a little bit of a wink, wink, nudge, it was that at the time. So Subaru started subtly advertising and it became a little bit of a wink, wink, nudge, nudge. For example, one campaign had Subarus with the license plates, Xena Lover. That was Xena Warrior Princess, which was massive with the lesbian community. I know it was because I had a lesbian boss

and she had a Xena Princess Warrior calendar at her desk. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe if you were a lesbian and you had no timeena Princess Warrior calendar at her desk. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe if you were a lesbian and you had no time for the Warrior Princess, you just kept it to yourself. Bit of a don't ask, don't tell Xena policy. Yeah, yeah. But one of them was, yeah, Xena LVR for Xena lover.

Another one was P-Town, which is a, no, not from what you think. Provincetown, Massachusetts was a popular LGBT vacation spot. Right. And they had taglines like get out, stay out. Now that was about exploring the outdoors in a Subaru, but also about coming out as gay. Right. Another one about the Subaru being an all-time all-wheel drive, full-time

all-wheel drive, would say it's not a choice, it's the way we're built. Right. Same with the Subarus, but also a nod, a tip to the hat of the fact that people don't choose to be gay. That's just how they're born. When was this? The 90s. That was the 90s in America.

And meanwhile, all the gays are getting Volkswagen Polos or Golfs. Yes. Yeah. Well, I don't have the actual stats that would back that up. Or Suzuki Swifts. I'm just trying to think of my gay friends with cars. Okay, hold on. Here's the stuff.

While Volkswagen played coy about whether an ad perceived as gay friendly really portrayed a gay couple, Subaru outright sponsored events like gay pride parades, partnered with Rainbow Card, a credit card that instead of cashback offered donations to gay and lesbian causes, and hired Martina Navratilova, the former tennis pro and lesbian, to appear in and front Subaruways. They also supported other gay athletes at the time

that other products wouldn't go near because they were scared of conservative America. I like that they not only were using that as a, you know, like targeted advertising, but they were also supporting gay rights and stuff. Yeah, I mean, there's something to gain both ways, right? Like they sell some cars to some people, but they also get to show their support.

Supporting their community. Good stuff. That works. Good stuff. This whole article is super interesting. Titled, How Sbarro's Became Seen as Castful Lesbians. How the reputation isn't a stereotype, it's the result of a calculated, highly progressive ad campaign

that was launched over 20 years ago. Very cool. So today's fact of the day is that lesbians were responsible for Sabara's success in America. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Hey, Anya. G'day. G'day, mate.

What did you have on toast for the first time this week? Guys, Vegemite. You simply must try it if you haven't already. What a delicacy. So this blew our mind yesterday after the show when you... I'm hooked, baby. I'm addicted. Now, for those that are...

You're on the good stuff. Yeah. For those that are new, maybe new to the show or missed it, was it last year you tried for the very first time... Porridge. Porridge. Porridge. Mushrooms and...

We did a series, didn't we? Yeah, there was a couple of other things. Because you were notoriously a fussy eater growing up. Your mum would just make you pre-cooked nuggies. Yeah. And I think as a kid, she must have been like, hey, what do you think about Vegemite? And I must have been like, it's not Nutella.

I'm not even going to dabble. But now... What a pushover. And this is so odd considering you've got your influencer Instagram page All about food But yet you You haven't had the basics, you haven't had the building blocks

Yeah, well maybe I need to do a post About Vegemite now But have you never had like Have you never had like a Vegemite scroll at a cafe Nah But guys it's great I've been having it every day on toast And you've never had Marmite scroll at a cafe. Nah. But guys, it's great. I've been having it every day on toast. And you've never had Marmite either.

Oh my God. How can you get to this age? I wouldn't. You've had the best. You still haven't had Marmite. Well, no, because we haven't got it at home and I might as well get through my Vegemite jar first. Okay.

See, a lot of people like one or the other. I like both, but I prefer Marmite. Yeah, I'm the same. What's the difference? Is there a difference? Bargher all. Marmite's a lot blacker. Vegemite's a little bit browner.

Yeah, but Marmite's got more of a tang, doesn't it? Yeah. I think I've still got pastures to explore in the Vegemite game because I'm kind of playing around with different breads. Do you put a lot of butter on? Oh yuck no I don't base it with butter. Is it a thin spread or quite a thick? Quite a thick. Have you dried

it with butter? Are you just going raw or dried off? You can't go dried off. No! You've got to have the lubricant. You've got to have the butter lubricant. You soak the toast in butter and then you lightly marmite or vegemite and it's the most amazing thing you'll ever have in your life. What ratio are we talking to

butter to veggie? It's got to be 2 to 1. 2 to 1 in favour of butter. It's not a thick spread, it's just a light This is the most knowledge and wisdom you guys have ever given me on a topic ever. Mind blowing that you're how old? 22. 22 and for the first time

yesterday you had Vegemite, or the day before. Yeah. Guys, it's delish. I think Vogel's is my favourite on Vogel's. That's a crunchy treat. That is a great bread for Vegemite. Double toast. Thank you.

Yes. Any of those smaller, thicker, crafty-feeling loaves. I tried it with a Freya's, and it just didn't have the crunch. You're right there. Not just taking anything away from Freya's, there's a time and a place for Freya's. Great bread. Wonderful bread.

Great bread, but it's no Vogel's when it comes to toast or Bergen when it comes to toast. For sure. We would like to know, what have you just tried? Maybe, like Anya, you've just tried a food. Just took down Vegemite. You didn't want to talk about it when you hadn't tried it because you didn't want to make a big deal out of it,

but now you've tried it. And maybe you didn't want to talk about it when you hadn't tried it because you didn't want to make a big deal out of it but now you've tried it and maybe you didn't like it. Yeah, true. Yeah, okay. Maybe you did finally try it and you were right all along. You knew you were going to like it. It's mind-blowing to me

that you wouldn't have tried that when you were a kid. No, so fussy. Yeah, it's like a staple on white bread. Like soldiers with Vegemite. And cheese.

And cheese. And mousetraps. Have you had a mousetrap? No. Oh, girl. Technically, it's a mousetrap with spaghetti.

Yeah. Yeah. But you can put a bit of marmite or something. So, 0800-966. What have you just tried?

What food have you just tried? Just, you could have tried it now. We'll see if Internania's alone or not. Talking about foods

that you've only just started trying. As an adult, Internanya, 22, has only just for the very first time on Tuesday tried Vegemite on toast. Vegemite, full stop. She hasn't tried Marmite. No. Not yet. And hasn't tried it on.

Hasn't tried Promite. You want to try all your mites if you're going to find a favourite? No, we don't need to do Promite. There's been a couple of pro-pro-mite supporters. Get in touch. Andrea, what have you had for the first time just recently? Hey, morning. It's not me, but my husband has just tried medium-rest steak.

He's really used to it being, like, dead, completely. Rubber. Yeah, completely chewy, you know, just gone. It's weird, Andrea. I must have misheard it because you said husband. Yes. So that implies you married somebody who eats well-done steaks. I did.

So now I'm judging you and him and his family and everything about these people. Hey, I mean, in his defense, he's changed it as of yesterday. So, you know. He's never going back. But do you think it's because, like, I remember growing up and vegetables were boiled to, you know,'s never going back but do you think it's because like I remember growing up and vegetables were boiled to you know

when they were mush and also meat was cooked till it was rubber did your mum bash the hell out of everything

with a tenderizing hammer and then cook it till it was leather and now that I've grown up I can realise she could have

just not done the bashing and just cooked it a little bit less yep that's it well that's great

so he's getting some experience and does he love the medium rare he loves it he loves it and i told him he would because i've tried to cook it for him before but he's like no you know how i like mine okay then silly boys listen to andrew more often andrea thanks you call nathan what have you just tried uh cotton candy sorry candy floss really what did your parents know? Why did you end up eating it? Because there's too much sugar in it?

No, we just travelled a lot. So all around Israel and all that. Oh, do they not have candy floss in Israel? No, they never let me try it as well. So what was it like that moment where you got your hand in a bag of candy floss? Well, last week it was actually quite fun. Last week? What's better, candy floss or Well, last week it was actually quite fun. Last week? What's better,

candy floss or Israel? Israel. Oh yeah, I was going to say hopefully it was candy floss and we could quell that whole problem by just dishing out a whole lot of candy floss. What was the event that you tried the candy floss at? The wife just said try candy floss. Do you know all that hard

work where your parents aren't done with a tri-candy floss. Okay. Do you think you'll try it again, Nathan? Yeah, probably. Okay, great. Nathan, thanks for your call. Have a great day.

No worries. Alicia, what have you tried for the first time? Avocado. When? About a month ago. Was it mind-blowing? God, you would have paid $1,800 for it as well?

I hope it was a pleasurable experience. I didn't grow up with it because my mum never liked it. Me neither. Me neither. And when we were kids, they were told they were fatty. So they were bad for you. They were full of fat. Yeah.

But I don't like it. Right. So not for you anymore, Avocado? Pardon? You won't do it again? No. But how did you, did you just spoon it out of the, how did you eat it?

Well, my husband eats it and he was like, just try it. I'll make it for you on toast. Just give it a try. Or maybe you need to try guacamole. Yeah, for real. What's that place in Christchurch that does it in front of you? Yeah. Casa Publica.

Casa Publica. Fresh and, oh, good. It's good. It's good. Yes. And you can say smoother, smoother, smoother. And they'll bash the chunks out of it or they can make it chunky. Yeah, that's what you need.

Some text messages in. Somebody said, hi, guys, Cad here. You'll never guess. I just tried coleslaw for the first time. Really enjoyed it. That's great. That's good. That's good.

Are we talking KFC coleslaw or are we talking like homemade? I don't know because I like a good coleslaw, but my mum will make coleslaw and like crunchy up terminate noodles into it. Does she put sultanas in it too? No, she's anti-sultanas. Uncooked dry, you missed, are you hearing this? Yeah, no, I'm not a fan of uncooked dry. Two minute noodles in the coleslaw.

Oh, not those crispy noodles. Two minute. Two minute noodles. Is she trying to like. Posh it up. No, she's trying to like, she doesn't want to buy those crispy noodles in the package. She's like, I can make these at home. She would never consider buying noodles that cost more

than whatever it costs to buy a 20-pack of 2-minute noodles. Why would she? My boyfriend just started to eat pistachio nuts. Oh, wow. We got talking about them and he said, they yuck. I said, you're the only person I know that doesn't like pistachio nuts. So we bought a pack.

And I soon learned why he hadn't liked them up until that point. He wasn't shelling them. He was just eating them shell and all. Oh, babe. Dude, open them up. It's delicious inside. How was he getting through that shell? I know.

His teeth must have ached after every pistachio. But he loves them now that he can take the shell off. Does he know you can get the hazelnuts out as well? He'd never be able to crunch a hazelnut. No, he's still working on his first hazelnut. He's been working on it for 15 years. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. And music lives here. ZM.