ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - June 27th 2018

Episode Date: June 26, 2018

Megan had to do CPR on her hair straighteners this morning, Swipemares and what is your "partner-sitter"?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Spark. Tap into free Wi-Fi 24-7 when you join Spark prepaid on a selected pack. Now, on with the podcast. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Thank you, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. God, I'm going to have to get out my crystals for a recharge. God, you don't want your crystals going flat? You're so facetious.

Do you? So what's lining up? The Earth, the sun and the moon. Yeah. But won't that charge your crystals anyway? Pardon me? Won't that just give some kind of crystal? You've got to put them on the windowsill apparently.

Yeah, not if they can't see the moon. Oh, right. Do you know anything about recharging crystals and it's the strawberry moon this full moon right great for like pink coloured crystals

do you believe in anything that you're here do you believe in love yeah I believe we're here for a limited time how we how we choose to spend

that time is completely up to us whether that be recharging your crystals or whatever you want to do like not eating bread I don't know that's I mean that's a we're your crystals or whatever you want to do. Like not eating bread. I don't know. I mean, we're not here for long. You might as well enjoy bread. Yeah.

Fair call. Got to get a cheese and bacon loaf lately. Delicious. Just don't want to start the show in a negative way, but have you guys been mucking around with my Facebook? Why? Like have you done this thing where you follow silly things? Tell me why.

Because I've got a whole lot that I didn't follow. Somebody's been mucking around, haven't they? No, I just got a notification saying a page you like has changed its name. Is it the Gluten Free Woman? No, it's Deluxe Browse Microblading Trading Academy. For Deluxe Browse. My thoughts are, has that woman purchased the Facebook page you already followed? I don't know.

No, that's just funny that it's very specific to Fletch. Because we always tell him to mark greenies. Megan is always on about my brows. He needs to get his brows feathered. See what's going on here. Has Facebook automatically followed because we've spoken about it? No, because Megan's mucking around when I'm out of the room. I swear I haven't done it.

I swear that's not me. Yeah, last night I got a notification. I was just getting into bed and then it was like, oh, Julia so-and-so gluten-free vegan's gone live. No, but seriously, these are things we talk about. So is Facebook just like hearing what we're saying? No, it doesn't like your pages. No, it can't be you like pages.

But this kind of hits home because you always give me a bit of stuck. And then the other day in the elevator, because you know the light's a bit different. I had a big hair and I was like yanked it out. I was like, Megan's going to notice that if I don't pull that out. Because you pulled it out. She's all like, your eyebrows, my eyebrows are not perfect or something. No, I didn't say not perfect. They fade out.

They fade away. They shape who? Halfway along. It would frame your face so beautifully if you just got a wee feathering. You know? Eyes are the window to the soul and the eyebrows are the frame of the window of the soul.

Yeah, but he's got enough people coming to his house for a window shop if you catch him adrift. He doesn't need the curtains, does he? God, he won't be able to keep them away. No shortage. All right, moving on. But what is the story with that? Don't know.

I'm pointing the finger at Intern Anya. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. All right, three news headlines for three stories that I've found online. Interesting, unusual, quirky, weird news stories. Pick one of the following three. Headline one, naked man claiming to be Jesus arrested. But it might be Jesus.

Oh, yeah. Like the last time he was here, it was 2,000 years ago. Shit's changed. Yeah, and it's like the Terminator when he time hopped. He was naked. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, because clothes can't time hop. Yeah, Jesus walked up to somebody and he was like,

I need your car, your keys, your boots and your motorcycle. Call the police. But I'm Jesus. Not with that accent, you know. The Bible did not have my accent right. Headline two, tag your it. Headline three, parents regret nagging son to mow lawns. Those are the three headlines today.

Tag your it is interesting. Is it? Because you know that movie that's out or coming out? Have you seen it? It's called Tag. I was going to say, we're going to need more than that. Is it about grown-ups playing Tag?

So they've been playing this game of Tag their whole life. I don't know all the details of it. But it's based on a true story. That's what this story's about. Is it about that? It's about Tag. Those people?

Well, not those people, no, but some other people. In that movie, you might, if you've seen the movie or going to see the movie, keep an eye out for the fact Jeremy Renner's arms are CGI'd the entire movie because he broke both of his arms just before filming began. So what did they green screen his arms? I think he had casts on with green screen dots on them or however they do. And then they overlaid them with skin coloured. Because he's wearing a jacket most of the movie.

Why didn't they just recast him? You can't recast Jeremy Renner. Also, would you take some of his fee out? Because CGI is not cheap. Well, your arms make up quite a bit of your body too. Yeah. Do we want that story? Yeah.

Okay, I'm going to send you a link, Vaughan, because we're going to need some audio. You've got to accept cookies on this news website. There were a family, an American woman flew to the UK where a UK family were all together for, I believe it was a baby shower. Okay. For a baby shower. Okay. For a family event.

They were out in the garden, and they wanted a big family photo. But in the back, there was a gardener in the way. Yeah. So I'm going to go to the audio now, Vaughan, if you can press the audio here. It might take, I don't know. So they're getting together.

Sorry, guys. Could somebody tell that gardener to move? So they're going to go over to the gardener. Right, so the gardener's in the background. You can't see. You've got the full back to the family, to the crowd. And they've convinced this younger guy in the crowd to go over. And that's when she turns around and tags him.

And now she's running away. And now she's running away. And she is flying back to the United States after literally flying to the UK to tag her friend who has been participating with her in a game of tag. Oh, he's just gone to chase her, but she's driven away. Oh, my God. So literally like the movie,

these two have been playing a game of tag since they met in China in 2014. That is so stupid. I could have gone all that way and just be like, Tag, hey, great to see you. Run. I know. And he's just like, what?

Come back here. How are you? She's just like, vroom. The flight's a line. Like, surely she's stopped off somewhere in Europe and had a little holiday. I don't know. Hopefully.

Oh, my God. But, yeah, the family and some of the friends were in on the joke. And, yeah, brilliant. And that's, oh, she literally drove away, and that's it. That's it. Flew back.

Wow, that's commitment. Left the UK that is commitment to a game of tag because my games of tag generally go tag you're it

tag you're it oh you can't tag your master this sucks end yeah I literally don't think

I've played tag since primary school or intermediate I was never quick enough you know there was that kid that you could literally be about to touch them

and they'd limbo under you really quickly I was never agile enough. You know there was that kid that you could literally be about to touch them and they'd limbo under you really quickly. I was never agile or limber enough to be good at tag. Right. I'd just run and hopefully my arm span was too big for people to get around, but often it wasn't. Yeah. Yeah, tags are no fun. Okay.

So there's been an idea I've been sitting on for a while. I kind of don't want to tell you now because I don't want anyone to steal it, but it's kind of already been stolen. Too late, Megan. It's in the news. I like legit have been thinking about this for a year. We've discussed it.

We've got a name. We're like, one day we'll do that. It'll be great. You had a name. Yeah. That's good. This sounds like Vaughn always coming up with app ideas. I know.

And then we're lazy and we don't get it done, you know? And then you're like, where do you start? One day, one day. Well, in New Zealand, an ice cream maker has created an ice cream for dogs. What about standard ice cream wouldn't be good for dogs? Lactose? Are they lactose intolerant? I don't think it's good for them.

Right. Because I know you can't do chocolate. So like, no, apart from chocolate ice cream, chocolate's no good for dogs. Because I've got pet milk, which I think is just milk with lactose. Yeah, right. Okay. Right. Gone are the days of when your mum and dad just used to put down a bowl of bloody blue

top milk for a cat or dog. Oh, it's a different time. It's a different time post-11. And then the cat would go outside and just like violently diarrhea everywhere. Mum's like, so I don't know what's wrong with that bloody cat. So this has happened in Oamaru. A guy, he works for Deja Mu Ice Cream. I like that.

He said he's had the idea for years but never had the opportunity to do it. Megan, don't be like that. He sees the day. Yeah, so he's created. He said the dog treats are soy based. Oh yeah, because dogs suffer from lactose intolerant. Being that I had this idea, you'd think I'd look into this. Yeah, I was going to say. So dog breast milk is low in lactose.

So if you get a lactose intolerant baby but a lactating Labrador, you could definitely latch your baby onto that. Get down there with all the pups. Right. What were you going to call your dog ice cream? Well, you may as well tell us now it's done. No, because it might still do it. This is my copyright. That's not how it works.

It could be... It would have a woof in the title. No, it's got alliteration. Oh, alliteration. Two words, alliteration. No. Go,, alliteration. Two words. Alliteration. No. Go, just tell her. No, should I tell you?

Because then I will ruin it. Yeah. Because just because he's done it, it doesn't mean you can't do it better. No, I know. And he's an omaru. That's ages away from me. But what, are you going to have like a store at like Mission Bay or like at the beach? No, I'd sell it to pet shops or something.

Or at cafes. No, you want to start with, okay, I'm on board. Because you know how you go to a cafe with your dog and you get an ice cream and you're like, oh, poor old mate doesn't have anything. No, Mission Bay, you get one of them little trolleys that you can tow behind a car, like a mini caravan, like a coffee cart. Okay. And it's got like just a big chest freezer in it and it's all like decaled up. It's like a peanut butter flavor. Your dad does decals.

Oh, yeah. He can do the sign writing. We need to do a brainstorm because you guys are good at this. Yeah. Yeah, but we also now we want 25% each of the business. No. No. Yeah.

You don't know what it's called. No, I don't. Also, you wouldn't need like. Is it named after your dog? No. Leo's Lickies. No. Tell us the name.

No. Because if you don't have a good name, this isn't going anywhere. We're Shark Tank. Dragon's Den. You've got to say the name No Because if you don't have a good name This isn't going anywhere No We're Shark Tank Dragon's Den You've got to say the name Should I? Yeah

Because Vaughn pretty much guessed it It was Leo Licks Leo Licks Leo Licks Yeah And it's going to have a cute little doggy face on the front And then you get your dog a Leo Lick Yeah

Cute, eh? Okay, I've copywritten that Everyone And the name's the weak point. Yeah, the name's confusing. No, the name needs to say what exactly it is.

It is, yeah. Your dog licks this. Yeah, but people don't know who Leo is. It's got a dog on the front. It's a dog. Leo's a dog. But it needs, like, okay,

we'll go back to that. This is why Vaughn and I are on board now with half the business. Yeah. Right. Okay, so forget about this guy in Omero.

He hasn't done anything. And you won't need, you won't need like a food permit for your food truck because it's not human. Because it's not human consumption. But humans can eat it if they want. Oh, can they?

No, I don't think they should. I'll just say not for human consumption and then it's like off my hands. Yeah, yeah, that's like, you put that on dog food but some people still eat dog food. Here's an idea. We should put the ice creams on a bone.

Instead of a stick. Yeah. Expensive. Oh, yeah, expensive. Like a bone the ice creams on a bone. Instead of a stick? Yeah. Expensive. Oh yeah, expensive. Like a bone shaped stick. Or a toy. Or like one of those chew toy things you get. Is that a good idea? No, that's expensive too. We're not wrapping it in plastic because everyone's moving away from plastic.

No, it's going to be in a recyclable tub. Really? You can put it down on the ground and they can lick it. Right. Or you can hold it for them. Fully compostable. I've thought about it. I've done you can hold it for them. Fully compostable. Right, okay. See, I've thought about it. I've done brainstorms. It's a good starting point.

Yeah, it's happening. Because he's in Oamaru. Yeah. Like, how many dogs can he service? Oh, 10. Yeah, exactly. 10. Get down to Mission Bay where everyone's walking their bloody blobby doodle.

We'll get our thing down to Oriental Parade. Yep. Yeah. All the hot spots. All the hot spots. We'll hit the doggy hot spots. Yeah, we've already gone nationwide. I like this. This is great.

Nothing can stop us now, baby. Oh, what about money? We need some money to start the business. Where did this us come from? You're not in this. You're not getting a percentage. It's too late. We've moved on the idea.

Should we all in favour of voting Megan off the board? No! Aye, aye. Do this one in favour. This is what we call a power takeover, Birch. Fletchborn and Megan's Community Notices. Welcome to Community Notices, a segment of the show where we see what's

happening around the country on local Facebook pages. A real chance for people to vent without having to actually confront anybody, really. True. Let's pop down to Tupo, where Carolyn's posted on the local page. Confused as she is.

Can anyone tell me what the frost was last night? All over the cars. Is this her first frost? What does she mean? I don't. No one's exactly sure about what poor old Caroline's got going on. Like, was there something different about the frost? Perhaps.

I don't know. First one? Was it mixed with a little pollen? You nearly skidded off your deck this morning, didn't you? I did. Actually, thank you very much. You've got to remind Sade. I've got to message Sade.

She took a spill on the deck. She took a spill. Not this season, but a couple of seasons ago, she took a spill on the frosty deck. In the previous season. Deck is very slippery today. Please be careful. Because her mum's at our house too.

She's older. Not like old, old, but old enough that she's getting to that sort of hip fall area. Yeah. Of her life. Please be careful. That's right. I've just taken care of it. All right. Thank you for reminding me because she could be getting up soon. sort of hip fall areas of their life, please be careful. That's right. I've just taken care of it.

Thank you for reminding me because she could be getting up soon. So I don't know if anyone's got any information about a weird frost. Okay, I think that's just what we're dealing with at the moment. Let's pop up to the Hibiscus Coast.

This one's always a good place to visit for a community board post. Christine's written, has anybody's boy got a sore foot today? Because it's possible he's the same twat that tried to kick over my mailbox in Red Beach during the small hours last evening. Shame for him.

The mailbox is cemented in and made of very thick concrete, so it's not going anywhere. But he's feeling it now. I guess you could say the winner of the day was Christine's rock hard box. Christine. All for the last line. All for the last line. Oh, yeah, Christine.

Put on her. Put on her rock-hard box. At her age. That's commendable. From the Lower Hut slash Upper hut by Sal and Swap. It's non-hut exclusive. Okay. It's both huts.

It's by hut, you would say. Yep. This page. Robert's got something for Sal, and it's a hand-painted fertility egg. $40. It's in excellent condition. R18 fertility eggs. Now, I don't know why a fertility egg would need to be R18.

And he says it comes in its own box. And there it is. Look. It's a painted egg. So you... I don't know what... These aren't what's going on here. It's just good luck.

Because the egg's a sign of, like, fertility and new life. And it's a painted egg. Maybe it's had some sort of blessing on it or something. Right. It's not. It's a lovely. I actually quite like the box itself because it's made of flax. It's like a woven situation.

Oh, no, I've delved into all kinds of IVF and fertility. Fertility. Links here. So is it like it's a decorative kind of fertility? It looks like it's decorative. I don't think one. I mean, it's hand painted, isn't it? I've actually just seen what's painted on here.

How did I look at this for so long and not see a penis? Oh, right. Okay. There's scenes of fornication upon the egg. Oh, okay. So it's like a porno egg more than anything. Right, okay. There's scenes of fornication upon the egg. Okay, okay, right. So it's like a porno egg more than anything. Right, okay. I think it's fertility enhancing because maybe it gets you going.

Yeah. Because you're looking at this hand painted. And, you know, credit where credit's due, it's very hard to paint on any curved surface. It is. See, it was hard just to paint. This artist has done well to just keep, you know, perspective and proportion well on these.

Now that I've noticed, there's breasts on it too. Crikey, how did I look at this egg for so long and not see these naked things? Well, that's how it works and you've answered our question. Yeah. Gets you going. We're all a bit excited now, aren't we? Gets you randy. Okay.

Speaking of randy, let's go to randy. Rangi Ora and Kayapoi, the buy and sell page down there. Because somebody's after a very specific item for their Acer laptop. They need the F key because they've lost it and they don't know where it's going. They're willing to pay $5 for an F key for an Acer laptop. Okay. That would be annoying. Oh, it would be so annoying.

You'd have to stop down every time you wanted to press F and push right in the middle. But at least it's one. It's only one key. Yeah. And you know it's the F. If you started losing like four or five, you'd be like, oh, what have I lost there? I think I'd take one of the lesser used punctuation keys.

You can buy random keys. Did you know that? The arrow. Can you? Yeah, for like five bucks. They click it. Well, that's how much Bramwell's willing to pay. Five dollars for the F key.

Well, he'd love to Google it, except every time he goes to type it in, he's like, where do I buy out? How do I type F? True. What key do you want? The one between E and G. In the UCSA notice, well, this is UCSA's University of Canterbury's

Student Association, right? So we're staying in the Canterbury area. Hamish has 45 litres of homebrew. Hamish. 45 litres. Are you legally allowed to do that? Actually, you know what? I read that wrong.

That's 45 litres of 91 gas stored in soft drink bottles. So you'll forgive my mistake in the fact that I believed it was a consumable given that it was being stored in consumable bottles. Yeah. He's got 45 litres of 91 and he wants to swap it for 45 litres of beer. Now, that's a pretty good swap if you're, you know, sort of a,

if you've got a connection to get your 45 litres of beer because petrol's expensive. And for Aucklanders, it's about to get more expensive as the regional fuel tax comes into play. Those are today's community notices.

If you see anything on your local Facebook page, including maybe a follow-up on how Christine's rock-hard box is going, the indestructible box of the Hibiscus Coast. Do let us know by screencapping it and sending it to our Facebook page,

FVMZM on Facebook. Australia is seemingly losing a bit of faith in Facebook because 1.8 million Aussies have deleted Facebook. Would you say Australia's getting woke? Yeah.

How many Australians are there? 10? 10 million? No. Well, if 18 million have deleted Facebook. No, 1.8. Oh, 1.8. 24?

That's there. I don't know. Yeah, no, there would be at least, at least it's a massive population. Sydney alone is like 10 million, isn't it? I always feel, I always feel. Oh, oh. 24.13. Oh, is like 10 million, isn't it? I'm going to go. Oh, 24.13. Oh, nice.

Million Australians. Nice work on the estimation of the population. That's pretty amazing. Yeah. That 1.8 million have had enough with Facebook. So they've done it because they want to reclaim their personal information. They don't trust it anymore. Right.

Is that after the recent situation? Yeah. Do you know what? I don't use it. I literally don't use it for news. Here's proof that they are 100% listening. Okay. Facebook. Clint, who's starting next week

with Bree and Clint, is doing some research of an area that I've got an interest in at the moment too. These home situations where you can be like, Alexa, turn on the aircon and it's all automated. The automated home, the moment too. These home situations where you can be like, Alexa, turn on the air con and it's all automated. The automated home, the base unit. The little speakers.

Yeah, and so I saw his Instagram story about it and I said to him, what's the deal with the Sonos? S-O-N-O-S. Yeah.

I've never talked to anybody. I'd never heard of it. Yeah. What's the deal with Sonos? Targeted advertising on Facebook in the next half an hour. That's amazing. But how the deal with Sonos? Targeted advertising on Facebook in the next half an hour. That's amazing.

But how can they deny it then? I do not know. He swore. He categorically said. Unless Senate hearings, we are not listening. They are teamed up with Instagram. They own Instagram. And I replayed that story a couple of times.

And maybe that's Sonos was written in there as text. That's the only other way it could possibly be like, oh, he's rewatched that. That shows an interest. Because how else? Crazy. Because do you put, when I go away on holiday, I used to always religiously put up, you know,

albums and things when you get back. Don't do that anymore. Don't bother. Not as much anymore, eh? And you used to put up every photo. Yeah. Yeah, but not now. But I know people that, like, don't use Facebook as much.

They might use Messenger quite a bit. Yeah. That's a different app. By the way, ads are coming in Messenger. What do you mean ads are coming? Apparently they're putting ads in chats soon. I read this last week. So if I'm talking to you, all of a sudden an ad's going to pop up.

Yeah, like in our group chat, they might just chuck up a video ad or something. Crazy, eh? What an unskippable video ad. I don't know, maybe. God, if it's that Sea Lord one where that woman's been fishing since she was two years old according to her father.

There's too many other options to have a group chat. People will just stop using it. But I don't know, but they own WhatsApp too, don't they? Do they? I think so, don't they? Don't Facebook own WhatsApp? I don't know. They've own WhatsApp too, don't they? Do they? I think so, don't they? Don't Facebook own WhatsApp?

I don't know. They've got us every which way we try to get out. But I don't know people that have actually deleted Facebook. I know people that don't use it as much, but I don't know anyone that's actually let it go and cut it off. So yeah, we're saying we don't use it, but I can't physically delete it. I've deleted Twitter, but not Facebook. Well, you just don't find out about so much stuff

because people only talk about it on there. Facebook do own WhatsApp, so. Really? So you can't go to your WhatsApp group either. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Regional fuel tax comes in for Auckland at the end of this week, Friday. Yeah.

It's going to be made up of a few different parts, right? The fuel tax. But it's most likely going to be costing you about 15 cents a litre extra. 11 to 15. So depending on the size of your car, that could be anywhere from what? My quick calculations, at least like $10 more a tank. At least. Yeah.

Uh, so yeah, just by running on what my car is, I think my car is fairly average. It's not big, but it's not small. You're just average in the middle. Very average in every way. Can we go to Ross and say we need more money, like $10 extra a week for everyone? Yeah.

Well, costs usually get passed down, not passed up, so. What does that mean? Well, like usually if it costs more, you just pass on that cost but we can't really

go to him. Oh, we're passing it on, I suppose. Yeah, we've just got to steal more stuff from work.

What? Let's all go get a milk, a bottle of milk out there. A few bottles of wine. And then, and then we've kind of

evened up the fuel tax by theft as a servant. Yes, yes, yes. And then you'll have no job and no ability to fill up your tank while going to new jobs to apply for jobs where they'll find out you got fired from your last job for stealing so they're probably not going to give you a job anyway. So the top six ways to save money in your car after the regional fuel tax kicks in.

And even if you don't have a regional fuel tax. No, this is just a great way to save your car. Now, number six, we're in winter. Yep. And when you use the heater, I always turn the heater on and then hit air con because it gives you, like, just hitting that AC button in summer makes it cooler and in winter makes it hotter quicker. But that is also starts using your fuel.

So number six, don't use the heater in the car. Start a fire in the back seat. Well, great warmth. But remember, wind the windows down so the smoke can get out. Yeah. If you light a fire in your back seat without winding the back window down, you're a moron. Not the front windows because you're trying to stay warm,

but the back windows just so the smoke can get out. Okay, you've probably got about two minutes to get to work as well. Yeah, right. Well, that's another thing. Get there as quick as you can. People will move out of your way because they're like, that car's on fire. Number five on the top six ways to save money in your car after the regional fuel

tax kicks in is get a divorce. Okay. And let them have the kids because extra weight in the car equals the regional fuel tax kicks in is get a divorce. Okay. And let them have the kids because extra weight in the car equals more gas used. Won't they get the car too for the kids? Oh, you probably get a new car.

Okay. And if it's just you, you can get a smaller car. Good idea. Downsizing. Yeah. It's a great idea. More fuel efficiency,

smaller car. Mummy, where's Daddy? Oh, there was a regional fuel tax. We've had to break up. So he left us. He left us. Can we go somewhere in the car? No.

Goodness, no. Number four on the list of the top six ways to save money in your car after the regional fuel tax. Pretend to break down. Yeah. And then get towed to where you're going by somebody who's driving past. It's a good idea. Because then they're using gas and you're not. You've got a free ride.

Plus, you've got to use those free AA call-outs. Yeah, well, when those get run out, just wave down someone in a ute or a van. I've always thought missing a trick, not letting you hook your car into the back of trains. Sure. Definitely missing a trick. Like, you could get a strap-on for your car.

And it's not that. You cannot be a car. But like you strap on some train wheels. Yeah. And then you just drive onto the tracks, pop her up on the strap-on train wheels, and just hook onto the back of a train. I don't see the problem with that at all, Vaughn. Me neither.

You see those trucks every now and then scooting down the train rails. Oh, man, I want one of those so bad. I know. I just take the train rails. I've got trains everywhere. Even through tunnels and stuff. Probably one of those so bad. I know. I just take the train route. Trains everywhere. Even through tunnels and stuff. Probably there might be a crash, but anyway. Number three on the list of the top six ways to save money in your car

after the regional fuel tax kicks in is pump your tyres right up. Flat tyres cost you fuel economy. That's actually a legit thing. That is. So why stop at pumping them up to the safely recommended PSI? Keep on going. What, until they pop? Until they're real tight.

Okay. Because then I imagine it's like your car running on ninja tiptoes. You know how ninjas always run on tiptoes? Yep. Because there's less of the foot touching the ground. Right. Makes sense. I'm no physics teacher, but I think that's how that works.

Yep. Number two on the list of the top six ways to save money in your car after the regional fuel tax kicks in. Neutral when you're going downhill. I do that. Yeah. No point having the rev dial on anything other than zero if you're not using it. Caitlin's got a real problem going downhills,

don't you? That's when you start speeding, isn't it, Caitlin? Well, it's just, um, yeah. I was trying to think of the technical term for it, but you can't help it. You just go down a hill and you go faster. Do you not have brakes? It's science.

No, I do. It's gravity. It's gravity. That was the word you were struggling with. That was the word. It's that thing that holds us all to the ground. What's that called? But you need the speed downhill to get you as far as you can.

It's like slingshot. So I don't have to put it in gear. My car's got that great on the uphill. I's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me don't know. I got all the way past. I almost got to the Mercer. If you've ever been down the south side of the Bombay Hills, from a glide down the Bombay Hills in my younger days, I almost got to Mercer. It's a hell of a roll. I had a starlet. A hell of a roll.

I was going really slow by the end of it, but no one else was on the road. So I was just like, let's see how far this thing goes. Oh, my God. It was a lot of fun. If I'd had more weight and a starlet, I could have gone further, I reckon. And the number one way to save money in your car

after the regional fuel tax kicks in and it costs you more to fuel up, avoid sitting in traffic because stop starting uses a lot of gas. Yeah. Drive on the footpath. Oh my God. Okay.

Or just give other pedestrians a gentle beep beep. I'm here too, watch out. And they should be sweet to get out of the way after a night're not, I mean, you've given them the best hope. You have. You can. That is today's top six. A study in the UK has found the one thing that couples argue about the most, and it's in the car, and it's speeding.

I was going to say, if it's in the car, it'll be speeding. Yeah. You're going too fast. You're texting. Oh, just look at the road. That's texting. Oh, just look at the road. That's what I get. Just look at the road. Why aren't you looking at the road?

Well, I'm seeing something that might be on the road, but then I follow it. You get easily distracted, don't you? Yeah. I'm like, oh, God, look at that. We've all driven with you. It's the worst. My wife doesn't have a problem with my following distance

like you guys do. She's just used to it. Yeah, I think she likes that thrill. It makes you feel alive, I mean. It's dangerous. Adrenaline's really pumping. Reminds you you're alive. It's not good. Come for a drive. Do you have that argument? Would that be

your number one argument? Not number one, but I do because he always speeds and it drives me nuts. Mainly because I'm like, I don't like paying for speeding tickets because that could be close. It's a waste of money. I'll give you that.

Driving fines are nothing monies. Yeah. Yeah, so it's not the fact that you could kill someone, he could kill someone. Or you could injure yourself in an accident. I mean, that's on the list. It's not top.

It's more your motivation is find money and shopping. I want to spend money on that. But that's where they find you for speeding. Yeah. But the one I know that really pushes the buttons, and I actually did it last night, is leaving dishes in the sink. Because we've got a dishwasher.

He's always like, put it in the dishwasher. I'm like, I'll get there. It's like I want a collection, and then I'll do it all at once. I don't know. But he did the dishes yesterday, and so he's like, I'll get there. It's like I want a collection and then I'll do it all at once. I don't know. But he did the dishes yesterday and so he's like, the kitchen's clean.

And then I went along and put a spoon and a ramekin in the sink. He's like, I literally heard him make a grunt and I was like, here we go.

Here we go. You did it knowing that it would wind him up. He was going to have a shit about it and he did. But I was like, I'll get to it. I'll do it in a minute. I was like, leave it till the up. He was going to have a shit about it, and he did. But I was like, I'll get to it. I'll do it in a minute.

I was like, leave it till the morning. He's like, and what time do you get up? I was like, well, I mean morning, like later when I get home. But yeah, I know that it winds him up, but I don't care. I don't have to do much. I wind up shut-eye like all the time, just wondering when she's going to leave me. This, if I do that too much, like I think I got something in my teeth, like all the time, just wondering when she's going to leave me. This.

If I do that too much, like I think I've got something in my teeth and I'll be like, but sometimes I don't have anything in my teeth. I'll just be like, like you say, here we go. What, just because you want to have an argument? Oh, no, no. Just tease them really, but then maybe not read the mood so great. But also, you're like, I want to do it. I know it winds them up, but I want to do it. So I'm just going to do it.

And I'll deal with the consequences. Yeah, totally. But Sade's totally, and she knows she's doing it, is the dishwasher stacking. She'll be like, to get my attention while she's all like humming while she's stacking the dishwasher. And I look across and it's just higgledy-piggledy. Oh, she doesn't respect dishwasher etiquette, does she?

And her mum stayed last night and her mum was doing the dishes. I was like, I'll leave those. I'll do them. Because I know, not like a lot of people say that to guests. I was saying that because I know where Shada got her shit dishwasher stack of tea. Directly from her mother. Yeah, right. I was like, oh, no, no.

Just leave those. Leave those. I'll do those. Yeah. I'll do those. No, seriously. Leave them. Leave. Just, would you please stop touching them? You've got everything all wrong as it is. So that's, yeah, that's. And then, but then she does that to get me to do something. Because I can fit two or three times the amount of dishes in the dishwasher. Right.

Okay. So she can just pass it off. She knows how to wind you up. A poorly stacked dishwasher. And I think everybody who's in a relationship, a long-term relationship, would know exactly how to get their partner going at a moment's notice. Yeah.

You know, most of the times, it's a bit like MacGyver. You look around and you see what's around you and you can wind them up using something in your approximate vicinity. And if you can't do that, are you really in a relationship? Yeah.

I think the answer is no. But I'd love to know this morning, you can't do that, are you really in a relationship? Yeah. I think the answer is no. But I'd love to know this morning in Texas 9696. Yeah. Oh, $800. What's your partner's go-to hot button? Like to just wind them up immediately. So you know the one thing that'll wind them up that you can do? Yes.

I like this. Why do we do this as humans? I don't know. If it's going too well, you're like, we must fight? Yeah, or you've got to keep match fit for when it's not going well. So you've always got to be on your toes

for handling an argument and you're like, we haven't argued for a little while. I feel like I'm losing a bit of my edge. Well, I better push a button. Okay, so what is the one thing that you can do that you know winds up your partner? 0800-DARZEDM 9696 FEM.

We know what to know this morning, what your partner's hot buttons are. How to get an argument started. The British have said that in the car, couples argue over speeding the most. Prominently. The most that they argue. Don't speed. Slow down.

Yeah. That's a big one for us. Who normally drives with you and Mr. Toyboy? He does. Okay. Only because I would rather get him to do it. Because then I can criticise. That's why I reckon Shadow makes me drive too,

because it's easier to criticise than be criticised. Yeah. Right. So when I drive, he literally tells me what to do. I'm like, you drive then. See, I don't. I kind of daydream and stuff, but every now and then I'll be like, oh, no, I don't think we should have gone this way.

But it's real, that tone too. Yeah, yeah. Oh, that real condescending. It's not aggressive in any way, but like, oh. It's worse. Well, this is a long way. This is an interesting way to have gone.

And somebody messaged in when their partner tells them off when they're driving and she says, you're speeding or you're following too close. I just pull off and ignore the GPS and just go my own way. And it really winds her up that I'm not following what is a computer determined

shortest way there. So we want to know what you're, and not necessarily driving, but just how do you get your partner going? Yeah, Ayla, good morning. Good morning. So what's the one thing that gets your partner riled up? Putting the toilet roll on backwards purposely. Oh, you're a monster.

What's a new argument as old as the toilet roll itself? Yeah, do you go like the... Against the wall or waterfall? Sorry, against the wall instead of over the front. Oh, you're a monster. Wait, you go against the wall? Yes. To rile him up? Yes.

Not the way it's supposed to go. It goes down, yeah. So you'll do that on purpose to pick a fight. You know this is going to upset him. Yes, because he gets sick of having to just pull it off, but it takes two seconds. Yeah, turn it around. See, I wouldn't even...

If I knew that you were doing that to get me, I wouldn't even make a deal out of it. I'd just turn it around and let it... No, but you make a deal out of it once, and that's it. Yeah, true. You've made a deal out of it, haven't you? Thanks, Hayla.

Michelle, what's the one thing you do? Michelle? No, Michelle, I believe, has gone. Okay. Some text messages. If we're watching a show that we recorded on Sky, when it gets to the ads, you know, classically everybody fast-forwards the ads.

Yeah. If I've got the remote, I fast-forward it on the slowest fast-forward. Oh. And he's like, just go to the fastest fast forward. It's about four minutes in ad break. And she's like, no, I don't want to have to go back, so I'm just going to sit in the slow fast forward. Sometimes if you go in the real

fast forward one, it's real hard to pause. And then you go over into the show. And you're like, into the next ad break because it gets a real roll on. It gets a real roll on. It gets a real roll on. Somebody said my partner's stupid face is my hobby. I mean that might be

time to call it quits. I don't know. If just looking at him gets you wound up. Wow. When my partner's speaking and I'm looking at him while he's speaking but the end of him speaking I just say pardon. Like that for some reason really gets him going. Like I'm looking at him but I'm speaking, but the end of him speaking, I just say, pardon? Like, that for some reason really gets him going. Like, I'm looking at him, but I'm not really listening.

And sometimes I say, I'm distracted by your beauty. And then he gets even more angry at that. I don't know why. That's a compliment. Michelle. Michelle is back. Good morning, Michelle. Hi, guys.

How are you? Good, thanks. What's the one thing that happens that riles you up? When I'm driving on the motorway like 100 kilometres and then I start getting into conversation with him so I start flying down to about 80 and it really, really grinds his gears. Because you can't drive and talk.

Can't drive and talk, apparently, no. Right. You've got to be paying attention. Is that because you want him to stop talking to you? Like, why do you do it? Oh, because it just annoys him. Because he does critique my driving a lot, so I just sort of do it on purpose. It's great.

I love it that we start arguments because we want it. What's wrong with us? We don't like fighting, but then we do it. We haven't had a dramatic enough day. No, that's it. Next time we'll teach him not to drink and maybe he should drive. He can be the sober driver.

All right, thanks, Michelle. Another text message. My partner hates it when I keep pushing things into an already full rubbish bin. Oh, I do that. But mine is, so he'll hate it and he'll end up going and emptying it, but then he can have immediate revenge because he doesn't put a new plastic bag lining in the bin and that drives me nuts. What is that?

Guys, I'm taking the rubbish out. Yeah, but now there's no rubbish bag in it. Finish the job. Finish the job. Nah, because if you've stuffed, and there's one of these in my house too, I won't name names. Okay. If you've pushed too much in, it's a two-handed job to get a super full bag out and support

it underneath. And then when you put it outside and come back in... I'm not going back to the rubbish bin. I don't need to. I'll stop at the couch. It's whoever needs to use the rubbish bin next has to put the liner in. But then I hate when you fool yourself because you're the next person to put it in the bin.

You use the bin and you're like, I wish I put the bin in the bin before. I live by myself so it's always me. I'm always waiting for that. Given that you don't have a long-term partner and you live with your cat, do you sometimes just want to wind your cat up? Oh, yes, that's what they do. Yeah, I'll wind my cat up.

If their cat looks too peaceful, they just start, like, messing with it. Yeah, I'll just, like, rub his belly and he'll just go crazy. It's good to know. It's what it's like, but it's with other humans. Yeah. New Zealanders love fish and chips.

That's a fact. It is. Well, our recent hot chips, we did the fast food fight. That's right. The food fight. Yes, that's right. The fast food fight. It was the Kiwi Treats edition.

The winner was the hot chip. We love a hot chip. Well, it turns out we also love throwing them away. As research has been done by the National Food Waste Audit by Love Food Hate Waste. And hot chips are our most thrown away takeaways by Kiwis. Followed by pizza, which I always keep and eat cold. Or with a light reheat. I don't like to go too crazy on a pizza reheat.

Who's throwing out pizza? So I find like you've got to eat them when they're hot. Otherwise, you can't reheat them. They're soggy and yuck. They're not a reheatable food. Does anybody have a good, anybody listening have a good recipe for the leftover hot chips? Because, yeah, I always just bin them, roll them up in the leftover paper and chuck them in the bin. How much are they saying with chucking away?

So I said pizza was second. Yeah. 500 tons of pizza. A year? From just Kiwis alone? Yeah. That is insane. 2,100 tonnes of hot chips thrown away.

That's 2,000 tonnes. So, a tonne is 1,000 kgs. Wow. Are they talking, when they say pizza, are they talking the crust? Sometimes I'm not in the mood for crust. Because who is throwing out pizza? No, I think they're just general weight. Yeah.

I can understand chips because you go somewhere and you might be like, oh, do we need a scoop? Do we need half a scoop? I know, that's the variety of scoops. And the potato industry has weighed in and tried to get an industry standard of 330 grams of uncooked frozen chip being the standard scoop. Right. But fish and chip places like to do them bigger or smaller.

Yeah. And it's hard to get them all to agree on a standard scoop size. And it's easy to have too many and you can just chuck them. That's bad to say, but it is. You don't want to, like, have... You want too many, don't you? Rather than not enough. Than not enough.

If you've got, you know, you and your mates are doing fish and chips. Yeah. Yeah. But could you put, like, cold chips in a crock pot with some kind of gravy? Like a poutine. No, because poutine is still based on the fact that those chips have been freshly fried.

Yeah, but if it was with some kind of meat and veggies and it kind of had like eight hours to kind of fresh, like absorb the moisture. Oh, you're just saying just turn into absolute potato and gravy. Yeah. Probably make all right potato and gravy. If. I'd probably make alright potato and gravy. If you, like, word it up. Some people like microwave chips warmed up.

I'm not a fan at all. Like, warm pizza, fine, but not chips. I just eat pizza cold, but cold hot chips? Cold ex-hot chips? They're no good. Yeah, so I don't know. So that's probably why we're throwing it away, because we can't do anything with it.

But that's an insane wast're throwing it away, because we can't do anything with it. But that's an insane wastage. Crazy wastage. Can't they just... Feed them all to seagulls. Yep. That's exactly what it's supposed to be. The seagull salvation army. They come around, they're like,

hey, thank you so much for your donation. We're not fussy. You know, we'll eat them cold. We'll eat them hot. We'll eat them covered in dirt. You know, we don't really mind. We'll put one leg up and pretend we've lost a leg. Yeah.

We'll do that for you. In fact, here's a choir of one-legged children seagulls to perform for their leftover cold chips. Right. Oh, no, I don't need that. Just take it. So as long as seagulls are getting the wasted hot chips, it's not wasted. No, because someone's getting it. But then are we overfeeding the seagulls?

Then we're going to have an obesity seagull epidemic to deal with. It's like introducing stoats to hunt rabbits. You're solving a problem with a bigger problem. Yeah, I don't have an answer for that. Maybe if anybody's just got a recipe for leftover hot chips, that'd be the answer. Okay, right. Abby joins us today for another edition of Swipe Me as we talk about your nightmare dating app situation.

So Abby, you swiped, you found someone on what dating app? Tinder. Okay. Classic. Classic. Classic. It's a swipe me as classic as a hunting ground. So you matched and then what happened? So we'd gone back to his house one night, so like the first time we'd met.

And things were getting a little bit hot and heavy, as they do. Oh, okay. And he got a call from work asking him to come in. Okay. And he actually left me. Do you know what he did for a job? Mid-hot and heavy. Well, then he's been getting a bit hot and heavy. Like, the reason you use Tinder.

So he left mid-hot and heavy to go to work? Yes, and so he left me with his family who I'd never met. Wait, wait, wait. You were getting hot and heavy and his family were there? Well, he lived at home. So you were just like in his room? Right, okay.

Carry on. So he goes to work and you were like, you've got to hang out with the family. Oh, wow. And then his grandma ended up reading my tarot cards. His grandma was reading? Oh, my God. Were you in a house bus? It was interesting, but, you know, my tarot cards were kind of negative,

and I think it's because I was in that situation. Did you not drive there? Did you have no way to just kind of leave? No, but when he got back, he was like, oh, you're still here? And I'm like, well, of course I'm still here. Where else is there snow to go? I'm like an hour away from my house. Where am I supposed to be?

So did it then, you restarted the hot and heaviness or the hot and heaviness therefore never happened? No, the hot and heaviness was over. So what did he do for a job? Did we ever get to the bottom of that? I think he was a bartender at the time. Ring, ring. Steve, you've got to get in as soon as possible.

Somebody's ordered a martini and no one else here is capable. Do you feel like he might have had a plan to kind of get out of there if things weren't going to his liking? Like a fake call? I'm not too sure because he ended up calling me a couple of times a few weeks later but I just ignored him. Okay.

Weird. What is his deal? That's so weird. Oh, at least you got a free tarot reading and, you know... A free lecture on veganism. Did the grandma have any

love advice in the tarot cards? No, it was all pretty negative. Oh, okay. I was like, oh, you know what this card means? Stop putting out on the first date. Hey, Abby, we're going to hook you up with a Swipe Mears prize pack. Thanks for sharing.

Thank you. And if you'd like to share your Swipe Mear, you can register ZM online. ZM. So looking like quite a nice, sunny, blue sky day over most of the country today. A little bit of cloud at the bottom of the South Island, but she's a coldie. Normally is the situation when it's a nice, kind of a clear blue sky day

after a big dumping. Yeah. Just to give you a snapshot of how cold it is across the country. And this is surprising. At the moment in Dunedin, 9.2.

Oh, that's balmy. That's a balmy Dunedin winter's morning. Beautiful. I think people will probably have the zips on their cap and do puffer jackets half open. Like, that's a summer day. Yeah, that's...

Really. Like, shorts and jandals weather. Christchurch, 2.5. Wellington, 9.2. No, Wellington, 5.9, sorry. That was Dunedin's. Hamilton. Now, I don't know.

This is like the latest from the Met service. This would be right. Minus 1.8. Yep. Because the cold snaps moved up the North Island. So, yeah, the North's getting way colder temperatures and Hamilton prone to a little bit of cold. And close to Taumatunui,

the current coldest place in the country, minus 3.2. And in Auckland at the moment, it is plus 3.2. So she's a coldie. She's a coldie. Down the road from Tomoronui is also the desert road. Shut. It is.

I'm looking at AA road watch. Shut. And we've had a victim of this cold weather. We have. It's not just trucks having to go the long way. No, no. I was like really upset this morning because I knew it was cold. I got up and...

Well, Vaughan arsed over on the deck, didn't he? No, I didn't arse over. I said I nearly arsed over. You arsed over. I didn't arse over. You did. If I'd arse over, I'd be milking out. I'd be like, I've got a sore back.

Taller's broken. So, yeah, when I got up this morning, I was like, oh, freezing. Like, I could see my breath inside. I was like, oh, freezing. Like I could see my breath inside. I was like, it's cold. That's so crazy. New Zealand houses are so shitty. You're not supposed to, eh? You go overseas and you're like, yeah.

Because when I went overseas at the end of last year and it was winter and it was snowing outside and I got into this like cheap-ass hotel and there was no heater. And I was like, oh my god, like what kind of third world country is this? And it was like not even cold, like they don't even need them because they're so well-informed. Also, they don't want

tourists like, oh, I'm chucking on the heater as well. There's that too, but they make their houses way, way better. So yeah, I could see my breath inside. And I get ready in the morning. I, like, put my makeup on and do my hair. And I was like, I'm going to wear my hair out today. I'm going to straighten it.

That's when I turned on my straighteners and they went, and made a little alarm. And I was like, oh, my God. Do your hair straighteners have an alarm? Well, because when mine heat up, they go, deno, deno, like, okay, I'm ready. We've got that in our house because every now and then I'll hear, menu, menu.

And I'm like, what was that? And I'll try to find it because it doesn't go very often. It goes once every few minutes. Yeah. Menu, menu. And Sade's just, like, left them on. Oh, yeah. And then I've got a different alarm when they decide to finally

shut themselves off. Mimimip. Or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they've got a different alarm when they decide to finally shut themselves off. Or something like that. And then it turns itself off. Right. Because it's like, I'm not being used. Well, this alarm, apparently, because I had to do it with Google, I was like, I've broken my, something's wrong with my hair straightener. Did you Shazam the alarm?

No. Because that's what I reckon. This is me giving away another one of my great ideas. Your business idea. Shazam for what the hell was that? Right. No, but most of the time you miss it. That's what I reckon. This is me giving away another one of my great ideas. Your business idea. Shazam for what the hell was that? Right. Most of the time you miss it.

I know, but then you just have it on. Okay, just wait. And you really be quiet. I'm just atmospherically shazamming. And it's like, are you GHDs or broken? It's too cold. Yeah. Was that it? Was it too cold?

Because they have ceramic plates. So they were too cold. If they have like a safety switch off, if you heat them up to that hot a temperature when they're that cold, they'll probably crack. So I had to give a wee little. Like CPR, clear. I had to huff on my hair straighteners for a little bit and give them a wee,

I put them between my legs because it'll give them a wee warmer. Was that cold? Was that an initial shock when you put those? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Put the cold on the warm and ill thigh. It was for a good cause. Did you unplug them before you put them between your legs? Actually, I didn't.

I didn't. It was still going. Right. Stay with me. Stay with me. Andrew walks in. He's like, what's going on? You're like, none of your business.

Stay with me. No. He walks in, he's like, what's going on? You're like, none of your business! Stay with me! Minu, minu, minu, minu! No! Did they come through? Did they come through? They did. They started working. Because you put them between your legs.

Yeah. To save your GHD. It saved, like, the warmest place I had at the time. But for people who live in permanently for six months of the year cold spots like Dunedin where houses surprisingly aren't insulated that fantastically for students.

Or can be colder inside. What would they have on hand? Would that have to do with every morning? You'd have to huff on that. With your breath. I was going to say you couldn't put them in hot water because it's an electrical product, isn't it? Could you get a, not an electric blanket, but like could you, if you wrapped it in a couple of pairs of socks or something.

No, put your GHD. Go to bed with your GHD. Take it to bed with you. That would work. Just put it under the hottie. Put it under your pillow. Right. Again, unplugged.

Again, unplugged. Yeah. Yeah, if someone comes home and they see that shaped thing under your sheets going, they might be like, good girl. F.E.M. Tip for the young players. Okay. I mean, I know that if my wife wants to go shopping, if she's like,

oh, I'm just going to go shopping, like gently mentions it and doesn't imply that I'm in any way required to attend and then she'll like just side glance at the playstation I'm like okay I know where I'm being led I'm a horse, I've been led to water and

yup, I'll drink it right up also she doesn't want you going there saying don't spend any money, don't buy that I'm just a pain to date shopping because I whinge the minute my feet touch the ground. Get out of the car. So she goes, and I've got, that's me. I'm taken care of. Yeah.

I'm good. I've got a tip because often the other way around, I don't know if you know this about females, but they can be a little bit like high maintenance. Sorry, what? Where they're not the. Say again. We can be a little bit what? Well Where they're not the... Say again? We can be a little bit what? Well, you're not exactly a buddy.

You're not a yucker in a bark garden, are you? More of a veggie patch that needs watering every day. Yeah, quite a bit of tending. You're a veggie patch. We do not need your tending. So if they're not shopping, it's quite hard to just ignore them and play video games. And that doesn't go for every, I've met a lot of females who play video games recently who are really into it.

My wife, not one of them, however. So this is a battle that I'm facing. Okay. However, I've got the answer for guys out there. Yeah. And I know at the moment, and once again, this doesn't speak for every female, but I've got a couple of mates who are loving the Football World Cup, but their partner's got no time for it. But they record the games and then at night they're watching all of these games of football

and their partner's feeling a little. So that's another one. If you're not even into video games, if you're not trying to get your Fortnite hours up for season four and the weekly challenges, maybe you're watching football. Yeah. Love Island, you're watching football. Love Island, you're welcome.

Because not only is Love Island happening in the UK, it's happening in Australia. And TVNZ On Demand are just cranking them out. And because there's two of them running and they run like multiple nights of the week. There's always an episode

of Heartbreak Island. There's all of episode of... And there's Heartbreak Island. Yeah, sure. There's all of them. Yeah. There's all of them. And Megan's like, okay, you got us. It's just, she sits on the couch with an iPad watching that. I'm on Fortnite.

It's peace. Producer Caitlin, how many hours have you spent watching both Love Island Australia and UK? So many hours. How many? But see, these are wasted hours because there's not a boyfriend benefiting from an occupied girlfriend here. This is not wasted hours. What about me? I'm a person just because I'm single.

Also, why do you want your girlfriend to be occupied? Do you actually not want to like hang out? Yeah, there's the hangout times. Have you seen the guys on Love Island? Because she's looking over at you being like um... Equivalent. She's looking over at me. No, because it actually does well for me because there's not

all of these guys, like their bods and stuff are redonkulous, by the way. Because I saw one over her shoulder the other day. I was like how much time would he spend working out? Yeah, Vaughn had a wee chat with us yesterday. He's like, genetically gifted though. Genetically gifted and in their early 20s. I'm working with what I've got.

What did you say? Wait till you hit your 30s, mate. Yeah, let's see you in your 40s, you fat prick, was what I said. But I mean, these guys, but there's not a lot going on outside the hot bodies. Like I don't think personality wise she thinks much of any of them. One of them in the Australian one, keeps saying Harry went to university.

Because most of them are models. Who's he trying to convince? Yeah, and he, Josh, he's my favourite. He tells everyone that he's really brainy. Right.

But you're saying this is Sade's babysitter. Oh my, so much so. And here's the other way that it's beneficial. Caitlin came, we were going out for dinner the other night.

Caitlin came around and looked after the girls. I, in my head, calculated I didn't need to start getting ready. The shutter kept going, get ready so when Caitlin gets here, we can leave. Knowing full well that when Caitlin arrived, one of them would mention Love Island. I had like 25 minutes to get ready once they started talking about that. It was time in the bank, baby. Yeah, right.

I've heard from fellow video gamers who were like does your household look like this and it's a photo of their partner watching Love Island and Fortnite on the telly. One of them I actually thought was a photo of my house because they had a similar television and couch. I was like how did they get a photo of my house?

I looked and I was like oh that's not my house. Almost identical. I would like to how did they get a foot in my house? And I looked and I was like, oh, that's not my house. That's their house. But almost identical. I would like to know, because we're onto something here, and this can work, by the way, ladies, if you want to do something, but maybe you've got a man that's like, what are you doing? You know, these men that need to be entertained. There's high-maintenance males as well as females. Get me wrong.

What is your partner's babysitter? What can you get them on to and that'll keep them occupied for a few hours? Just so you can do what you want. So you can do what you want. Because you've got to keep functioning as individuals. We need tips. To keep them occupied.

Because there might be people out there who are just like, they're not into that, they're not into that. Let's hear a bevy of ideas and get a list going of ways to occupy your partner. Because Love Island is going to finish soon. Love Island's not forever. It's not forever and we're going to need new things.

Very true. 0800 DALS at M 9696 Your partner sitters are what we're talking about this morning. Where you can leave your partner with something for a few hours and get some you time. Yeah.

Yours is Love Island at the moment. Mine's Love Island. It gives me Fortnite time. But then Fortnite time is her babysitter for you. Yeah. Yeah. But if she's looking for something to do. Yep.

You'll just be like, Love Island. And I'm like, but I just want to drop in with the boys. And now I've got Love Island to fill that gap. Right. So we want to know from you, what's your partner sitter? Yeah, Rachel, good morning. Hey, guys. How's it going?

Hey, you're in a similar situation, Love Island and Netflix? Yeah, mine's pretty much the same as Vaughn's. He'll be late and my partner will be late to me. Do you have any shows you want to watch tonight? So I'll head off to the bedroom, sit in the electric blanket, watch Love Island, and he'll watch, he'll play Fortnite out on the lounge. Oh, I thought you meant, like, together, but no. No, no, he's just, like, he'll ask, like, do you have any shows you watch,

like, a.k.a., like, are you going to leave soon? What? Smooth. I do the same to him. I'm like, hey, so, like so what time are you playing games tonight? What time will your boys be ready? So it's like a treaty. You've kind of both brought something to the table.

But you're still considering. What are you going to do when Love Island runs out? I'm like a huge YouTube watcher, so I just watch makeup tutorials all the time anyway. Because someone messaged in saying that there are partners that are as makeup tutorials. They'll say, and someone messaged in saying that they're our partner sitter's makeup tutorials. They'll say, and they've got the notifications on their phone, so they get a phone and it's like

Shani XO's got a new makeup tutorial and they get home and they're like, oh my god, did you see Shani XO's got a new makeup tutorial? And it just buys them an hour. I get lost on Instagram with makeup tutorials. You just fall down there. Thanks, you're cool. Rachel, Matt. Good morning. Hey, how's it going?

What's your partner's babysitter?. Thanks, you're cool. Rachel, Matt, good morning. Hey, how's it going? Good. Now, what's your partner's babysitter? Oh, man, we're like still in the honeymoon period of Netflix. We've only had it like probably three months now, I suppose. Oh, wow, okay. So it's fantastic because my wife is just like season after season of, I don't know, some Netflix stuff. Yeah.

But then we had a drama about three weeks ago because the TV blew in the bedroom. And I was like, oh, this is not good. One night of, so what are you doing? What can we do? Should we watch a movie together? Full on next day out Harvey Norman, buy a new TV. This was all too much. I don't want to have that much time with her.

Totally committed. Totally committed. I was like, yeah, look what I bought you, babe. Check this out. Bigger, brighter, shinier. And so what do you do when she's Netflixing? I've got a Nissan GDR, so I just go driving and do car things.

Right, okay. We've heard from lots of guys who have said that they're going to use this Love Island thing because they need a bit more time out in the garage with cars and motorbikes. And for wives, that's nice too when you want some husband-less or partner-less time. Send the lads or the lasses to the garage to work on cars. Exactly. Alright, thanks. And for wives, that's nice too when you want some husbandless or partnerless time. Send the lads or the lasses to the garage to work on cars. All right.

Thanks. You're cool, man. Somebody else said, someone messaged in, I'm the same as with makeup videos, but on the other side of the coin, I've got notifications on my phone to say when this guy my husband likes who does daily car videos has a new video. So I'm like, oh, he's got a new video. That's genius. So you should know what your

partners are into on YouTube and set up notifications on your phone when they upload a new video because then you've just, you're giving them the ammo. That's really smart. Yeah. Somebody said that my husband is loving Love Island, not watching it,

as it gives him time to play video games. Yeah. But then afterwards, I'm often so randy, he'll get lucky. He's double dipping. Okay. He is.

Is that upsetting? Has he just clocked life? But is that upsetting because he knows that she got like all excited? Look, he's a married man. He doesn't care how he's getting it. He's just getting it. Why isn't that working for you?

Probably because I'm still playing Fortnite with my violence. Maybe you should pause it. Well, I think you're missing this opportunity. Pause a live battle royale, Megan. Okay, well, quit it. Hey, everybody. Hey, every other player. I think my wife's addressing me.

I'm just hiding under this. Don't kill me, okay? I'll be back. I'll be back. Someone move me. If I'm in the storm, someone move me. Because this doesn't happen often. I'll be back.

Bye. They're not going to kill you. Somebody else said, my husband knew I was into horses before I met him. So a little while ago, he bought me a horse. I had no idea he was partner sitting me with a horse, but now it all makes

perfect sense. He gets so much time to do whatever he wants because horses take so much time out of your day. He must be cashed up because that's not cheap. Anything associated

with a horse. I know, very expensive. He's got a cheap hobby. Buying the time. Somebody else said, I encourage my partner to take up fishing to get some time. Well, I've just never seen him anymore. That's nice.

That's nice too. So it can backfire. Be careful. But then it also works. Someone said, what about the guys who are obsessed with Love Island 2? That's great because you're both being babysat by the same thing. Yeah.

You can spend time together, which is what most people in partnerships like to do. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. That sounded like NSYNC at the end. Like 99s. We both went high You stayed with the low harmony On the outro

Fact of the day intro We're all going High NSYNC Inspired I can't try and harmony Because I've lost my voice Well you can do Joe for Tony

I'm not Joe for Tony You are Joe for Tony I'm the Justin Timberlake Megan's the Joe for Tony You're Jay She's the J.C. Shashashis No you're the J.C. Shashashis You are

I'm not J.C. Shashashis I'm the Justin TimC. Shashashis. I'm the Justin Timberlake. Oh, Christ. What are you doing? Are you having a spray and prep for the song coming up? Okay, you've got the man clue. I've got the man clue.

I like Lance Bass. That is such a Lance Bass thing to do. Such a Lance Bass. It's just to spray a honey spray on one's throat mid-break. Such a Lance Bass thing to do. Today's fact of the day. Semi-inspired by your lovely mother, Bev, has she updated her travel blog?

Oh, I haven't checked. Please check. You check if she's done her travel blog. So I messaged her after the show, what's apt to her? And I said, Vaughan's really excited for a new blog update. She's like, I've done a draft. I'll post it in the morning.

She's drafting. She's drafted. I'll have a look. I like that she's drafting morning. She's drafting. She's drafted. I'll have a look. I like that she's drafting. Is she like, they say when you're going to write an angry email, you write it and you put it in your drafts and you leave it. Is she making sure she still agrees with her opinion? I don't know.

It's after a 12-hour break. Okay, you, have you got? I'll look, yeah. Oh, that's right. It's password protected. She's been to the Rose Festival, eh? Oh, she's done an update. The first few days. Yes! Denmark.

Denmark. And more photos. How is she doing this? She's doing great. She's a boomer. She's a baby boomer. She's killing it. How's she doing photos? Many photos of roses from the Denmarkian Danish Rose Convention. What's her blog called? Bev Blogs.

Bev's Travels. Oh, it's cute. It's pretty cute. Very cute. Very cute. That's so great. You're just lucky she can't hear this because she ripped me a new one. Near Denmark, Switzerland. Okay. This is a fact about Switzerland hiking trails because that's where she's going

next. She's going to hike across England. If you joined every Swiss hiking trail end to end, it would go around the entire globe one and a half times. It's not the biggest country on the map, eh? I'm just going to say that

it's not the biggest country. So the whole country's walking tracks. Yep. What? Officially recognised hiking trails in Switzerland, if you added them end on end, would stretch around the world one and a half times. Would there be any, would we even come close to that with our trails?

I don't know how many kilometres of hiking trails we have. Because that's insane. It is crazy, eh? Yeah. So I've got some other Swiss hiking stats, numbers wise. Hit us, hit us. 20,000 is the average number of people living in Switzerland who are injured each year while hiking stats numbers wise. Hit us, hit us. 20,000 is the average number

of people living in Switzerland who are injured each year while hiking in the mountains. This includes 40 fatal falls and tumbles and all of that sort of thing. This is money wise. About 1,200 New Zealand dollars

is the average amount of money every person in Switzerland spends every year on hiking gear. Right. $1,200. It's a lot. It's a lot of money. 60% of hikers who frequent

Switzerland's vast network of restaurants and inns along the hiking route. So that 60% of people who hike on there will go to the facilities on the track. I know. When I've been the track. I noticed that. When I've been there, I've noticed that you hike up mountains

and there's like restaurants up there. It's amazing. So cool. So just like mad facilities. Just stock huts with rats and stuff. Yeah, you do.

Hiking your own. Yeah. Hike out the leftovers. 300,000 foreign tourists a year go to Switzerland to hike. Wow. That's a great place to go for a hike.

And then there's some pictures. And it's beautiful, but then there's some hot people too. So that's... Okay, good. Good stuff. That's always a good... Spend all the money you want on tourism, on promoting yourself as a tourist destination.

But you've got to have hot people. That's why we do so well in Zealand. Yeah, that's why we do so well. Primarily. On us. And our Kiwi accent. Preparation for it. So today's fact of the day is that if you joined every

Swiss hiking trail end on end, it would go around the globe one and a half times. Fact of the day! Day, day, day, day, day. Ah! Bev, Fletcher's mum's travelling at the moment. She's doing an LA of sorts. It's a six-week. Solo. Sojourn. Have you called your dad?

Would you please call your dad more often? He's a grown man. When was the last time you spoke to him? He's used to having people around. I know, yeah. You've got to call and make sure everything's all right. Make sure he's not eating all the fried food. Because he does a lot of fried food.

I know. He's not allowed. Make sure he's not eating all the fried food. Because he does a lot of fried food. I know. She said he's not allowed. He's breaking the rules. So mum sent out an email to everybody, friends, close family, the link to her travel blog. So rather than having to communicate with everybody individually, one stop, you go and check in, see how it's going. And blown away because there are pictures.

I know it's an easy set up template. It feels like what a lot of people were doing with GeoCities and the like it's going. And blown away because there are pictures. I know it's an easy set up template. It feels like what a lot of people were doing with GeoCities in the mic. It does. In the, you know, back in the early 2000s.

But I'm just blown away because, you know, there's like paragraph, picture, paragraph, picture. I'm like, how's she doing this? She's doing great.

Like, well, let's delve into how her first few days are going because that's what the title of her first blog entry is, The First Few Days. Okay.

It's very matter of fact, isn't it? Bebs travels the first few days. Oh. Because that's what the title of her first blog entry is, The First Few Days. Okay. It's very matter of fact, isn't it? Bebs travels the first few days. Oh, yeah. Well, no. She's just got a lot of time spent on the pictures. It's just fact. It's fact-based. But see if you can see any similarities between Fletch and his mum.

Okay. We arrived in Copenhagen around lunchtime on Thursday, after what seemed like forever in the year. The flight from Auckland to Dubai was full of crying babies. So that didn't help. I wonder where he gets them. I don't know.

I have no idea. Our hotel in Copenhagen is fairly central but in a quiet street close to the railway station. We freshened up and headed out for some food. We soon learned

what we'd been warned about, that it's very expensive here. A simple salad meal costs around $35. About double what it is at home. Stating the facts, Mum. Stating the facts. It's expensive. Being warned, coming here, beautiful, expensive.

The next day, we headed south from Copenhagen to the nursery of Tobin Thim in Love. The nursery and garden are filled with old roses and then she puts a photo of a birdcage made from rose prunings. More of an artistic birdcage than a practical one, I think. We then left the island of Zealand, which are we named after that? I don't know, New Zealand.

The island of Funen along the Great Belt Bridge, built about 20 years ago. It was built in two parts. This is now her I'm just finding out love of engineering. She's a huge fan of civil engineering. The eastern side is 6.8 kilometres long with two supporting pylons 254 metres high to allow for the shipping lane underneath.

In the middle, there's a small island of Scrooge. And then the western bridge connects to Funen. That bridge is lower and about eight kilometres long. The total in bridges plus a small island, 18 kilometres long. What an amazing experience. Did she say that? She loves the bridges. That is phenomenal, though.

You're driving a bridge 18 kilometres long. I'm all with Bev on that one. That's phenomenal engineering. I don't know if I'd blog about that. The sort of thing you'd expect out of China, but not Denmark. There was a brief visit to a rose nursery next. Yeah, loves the garden.

From a distance, we thought we could see a field of roses. These turned out to be roses and clematis. Imagine that. Mistake from a distance. Oh my goodness me. She is going to get so shitty when she finds out we're talking about her blog. It was a sea of colour.

We visited an amazing seaside garden next with an abundance of colour. This is the home and garden of the Esklund family. Oh, no. They run a rose nursery. Rose garden. The sea occasionally comes about halfway up the garden during stormy weather. We noted the vegetable garden was in raised beds. And then there's some photos of it and the sea and everything.

And it says, apparently Hans Christian Andersen had a home nearby and wrote the ugly duckling on this very beach. That is a great mum. You actually are liking this mum blog. I am, I am. It's so what your parents tell you when they come back from travel is like,

you want to know like where good food was, like, it's uber cheap. Oh, my parents fill up on a breakfast buffet and don't need to eat until dinner.

They don't know that. Eat it all now. I'm all about eating. Yeah, yeah. Like, oh no, no, we just ate it. They tell you this about the gardens and...

Yeah. Now, she's, back on the road they are, the countryside of Denmark reminds me of England. Deciduous trees line the roads and fields are bounded by hedges. Deciduous. The whole country appears connected by efficient motorways. Oh my God.

She's loving it. The population is about the same as New Zealand with the bigger city. About the same as Auckland. The people here do remind me of Kiwis. They're friendly, hospitable, and I feel safe. The food's similar and everyone drinks coffee all day long.

Tea is available, but I found it tasteless. So best I be sticking with coffee. There are wind farms. She's breaking down the coffee and tea sitch. Here we go, ready for it. There are wind farms. She's breaking down the coffee and tea sitch. There are, here we go, ready for it. Because there are wind farms everywhere. Petrol's dearer than ours.

Well over $3 a litre we converted. And we complain. End of blog. Here ends blog. All right, okay. Because my parents love doing it the other way. When they go to America, they tell you how cheap the petrol is. And then complain. And then go somewhere where it's more expensive and say,

what right do we have to complain? She's had no comment. She's had no comments on that. Well, she's about to. And I'm about to comment on it. I'm loving this. You all know that if you comment, you're going to... She will know that you're reading it.

She wanted me in. Oh, I've got to set up a travel point login detail. Oh, it's a comment. No, it's a comment. There was a long bridge. There was a flower garden and a veggie garden. Weak tea. Weak tea and expensive petrol.

She saw the beach where the ugly duckling was. And the sea sometimes lapped at the gardens. Drink and comment still be with her. That's all we can summarise from my mum's travel blog. And we will keep you up to date because this blog is password protected. So you're not going to be able to go there on your own time, unfortunately. It's time for last calls this morning. We're going to be able to go there on your own time, unfortunately. FEM. It's time for last calls this morning. We're going to start with Danielle.

Hello, Danielle. Hello. Hi. What's your story for last calls this morning? Okay, so I had that artificial leg. Okay. Okay, and so I went for my first sleepover with my friend. Okay. And because I was self-conscious about my leg, I made sure that I kept it on.

Right. And so the mum came in just to check on us, and she saw that my leg was, like, slipping out of the blanket. So she went to pick it up and, you know, put it back in. And so she pulled it all the way off. Oh, my God. And so she didn't know that you had an artificial leg? No, no, she did.

But she's just like, you know, you forget these things because not every child has one. You do. And so were you still asleep at this stage? Yeah, I was. I was down to sleep and then I woke up to her screaming, thinking, what's going on? And I was like, oh, it's just my leg.

Because I was going to say, what do you do? Try and put it back on or like put it down on the floor? I think I just tried to calm her down a bit. Like, you know, it's okay. It's just my leg. Let's put it down and go back to sleep. I would have like made a big deal. I would have set the stage to make it look like the leg had plopped off

and it was on the ground. I would have thought about angles. I don't know. What have you done? Perfect crime scene. Yeah. Oh, my God. I don't know what I would have done.

I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Probably like you, Bort. I would have left it on the floor and been like, just pretend it's fallen. It's just fallen off. Alright, Danielle, I'll wait there. We'll vote in a sec. Tori, what's your story for last calls? Hi. Basically, I went to Bay Dreams at the start of the year and I was quite short.

Everyone feels really bad for me in mosh pits and people ask to put me on their shoulders all the time I'm always up for it and this guy was I was on his shoulders and I was like what's your name and he was like Fife and I was like oh like Fife dog you know like Midnight Marauders Tribe Called Quest and he was like what didn't get it anyway that was fine whatever I went to Mardi Gras over the weekend and the same thing happened I was on a guy's shoulders at the front having a great time. I was like, what's your name? And he was like, Fife. And I was like, oh, like Fife's dog, a child called Wes.

And he was like, what? And I was like, oh, my God, did you go to Bay Dreams? Are you the same guy? Like, what are the chances? And he was like, yes, you're the girl that fell off my shoulders and damaged my knee really badly. And I was like, no, it's the same dude. Like, oh, it was so, I was like, what are the chances?

And I just gapped. I just gapped. Why is he rushing to the next festival to chuck someone else on his shoulders if the last time he did it, it caused injury? Honestly, I have no idea. And whose name is Fife? When you wouldn't know every single famous Fife there's ever been. It's an unusual name.

Maybe you're meant to be together. I don't know. I'll find him at Northern Bays and see what happens. Yeah. I think he's got a bit of a habit of getting the short ladies on his shoulders. Either that or he's going to give you a bill for all of his physio, for his knee, for his leg that you've caused. All right, let's vote the Tribal Council for our favourite story.

Danielle, you have won today. Woohoo! Thank you.