ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - June 28th 2018

Episode Date: June 27, 2018

Vaughan tried to fix his keyboard and failed massively, This Is Why I'm Fat and what can't you stay away from?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Spark. Tap into free Wi-Fi 24-7 when you join Spark prepaid on a selected pack. Now, on with the podcast. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Another chilly start around the country. Not as chilly though, right?

Not as chilly. Do I have to send another 6.30am reminder that the deck might be slippery? I don't know. Did you slip over this morning? Nah. Okay, so not as chilly. Not when I left. If we're going by that scientific method.

It gets a bit colder though, eh? Yeah. Closer to dawn. When the sun comes up. Yeah, just before dawn it gets quite cold. Who's got the hottest? Do you want the hottest? Yeah, we'll start with the hottest.

The warmest place in the country right now. Guess. It's either Wellington or Dunedin. No, I think it'll be up north today. This temperature's taken in the Port Hills in Christchurch. 9.6 degrees at the moment. Do you want to have a guess at the lowest place in the country? You love saying this name, Vaughn.

Oh, yep. That was what I was going to say I was told the other day Topol Thank you More of a DT at the start Topol There we go

What temperature is it? Minus 2 Wow Minus 2 Dust cold Germany is out of the football world cup Minus two. You forgot the main detail. Minus two. Dust cold. Dust cold. Germany's out of the Football World Cup.

I know. To Korea. What do you say? Auf Wiedersehen? Auf Wiedersehen. What does that mean? It's goodbye, isn't it? Goodbye. In German.

Auf Wiedersehen. Auf Wiedersehen. And I believe Brazil is playing. Paraisel. I thought you were saying Brazil are out as well. I think if they lose, they're out. I was like, that would be... I think if they lose, they're out.

I assume they just burn down their home country if they... When I was in Brazil last week, everything shut down for the World Cup. Everything. Like, supermarkets shut. Could you imagine supermarkets

shutting here for the All Blacks just for a game? Because nobody wanted to miss the Brazilian game. No, but... And the Metro, I was on the Metro, there were like 10 people

on the train, normally, like, crowded. Was the train in the Metro, I was on the Metro. There were like 10 people on the train, normally like crowded. Was the train just like drive yourself because the driver was not pushing? Or he was, you know, live streaming it so you had to do the train stuff? And then when they got a goal, you just hear this rumble. Because apparently in Mexico when they scored a goal, actually registered it on the Richter scale. Are you kidding me?

No, it did in their first game. Good God. Crazy, eh? Actually had some localised earthquake action. Isn't there something like four of the finalists of the last World Cup are already out? Germany? Three. Three, I believe.

Your last three, I believe. Good Lord. That was James that came in here and told us that. We all suddenly had no sympathy. Yeah, definitely three. Yeah, definitely three. Sporty knowledge. Thanks to James, the producer in our ear there.

Which Korea bet Germany? Good Korea or bad Korea? I don't know if North Korea is not bad. Korea. Not a no, but yeah, they are. South Korea. They're probably holding their own World Cup and Kim Jong-un's already won it.

He's won it. Single-handedly. Because he's magical. All right, today on the show, 8 o'clock this morning, we've got a huge announcement about Kiwi, about, I'd say, what a, I don't want to give too much away here, but a Kiwi summer tradition just got a whole lot bigger.

I know, and it seems weird that we're talking about it so far out, but when you hear the scale of this, yep, this proposal, you'll probably see why. It's a pretty massive deal. Also from Heartbreak Island, Genity joins us in studio

just after eight o'clock this morning. Left the island last night. I'd say she'd have a few things to talk about this morning. Yeah. Mmm. I wonder if she's got a few things to talk about this morning. Yeah. I wonder if she's got a rag. Like the breakfast buffet? I don't know. That's my main experience when I go to a Fijian island.

I just love a breakfast buffet. Alright you lot, listen up. It's story time. Three news headlines for you. Pick one of the following headlines. Headline one, name, dead giveaway. Headline two, dental dogs to the rescue.

And headline three, man blows company money on pedigree kittens. I know the man. I know that last story. He spent, and it wasn't mucking around. It was hundreds of thousands of dollars, isn't it? Yeah. Of company money. Was it 320?

Yeah, it wasn't just pedigree kittens he was buying. Yeah, but he embezzled. A lot of money, but a lot of it went on kittens. Which is something I would do if I stole company money. Any word on how many kittens? No, I can't work it. They haven't specified the amount of kittens.

The amount of kittens. Or what breed of kittens? No. But he'd be spending some high... He'd have a few. Big money. Yeah. Because, yeah, they can get expensive. Wow. Okay.

But I think we know enough about him. Yeah. What were the other ones again, quickly? Headline one, name dead giveaway. Yeah. And headline two, dental dogs to the rescue. I think one was my favourite. The name's a dead giveaway. Yeah. And headline two, dental dogs to the rescue. I think one was my favourite, the names are dead giveaway. Okay.

Yeah, okay. I'm going to go with dental dogs. Yeah. Okay, we go now to Western Australia now, where a court have sentenced five Asian men between the ages of 23 and 26 years to prison for their involvement in smuggling 182 kilograms of methamphetamine, which they call meth, they call ice over there, don't they? That's what they've referred to it in the story as.

They were caught in 2016, so they've only just been found guilty and sent to prison. They were part of an international drug syndicate with operations out of Hong Kong and Malaysia. Yeah. They smuggled the drugs on board a wooden fishing vessel. The

name, though, was the dead giveaway for authorities when they saw the Megaprofit 2. Tracking towards Australia. Megaprofit 2. Megaprofit as in... Oh, profit as in P-R-O-F-I-T. I was thinking profit as in, you know, like a religious figure.

No. The Megaprofit. Yeah, I don't know what happened to the Megaprofit 1 vessel, but the Megaprofit 2 vessel suddenly raised the eyes of Australian authorities and they... Do you pull over a boat?

Yeah, you kind of do, don't you? You kind of go, boo, in their police boat. Get up beside it and call them a deer. You board it, right,

prepare to be boarded more than pull them over. Yeah, and they managed to get to the boat before it got to Perth. Australia, full of meth. Really?

And their mega profit too was, yeah, seas. What else did mega profit have on board? Well, it just looked like

a real junkie fishing boat. I'll show you a photo, see? Oh, you can't call a junkie fishing boat Megaprofit. If it was like a super yacht. I know, yeah. You'd call it Megaprofit. Because that makes sense. Did they know what it was called?

Because quite often there's that lost in translation thing, like you see some horrendous things written on T-shirts in Asia. You're like, I don't think you've got any idea what that says. They did. It was in English. And then, you know, vice versa as well. You see English people with horrendous tattoos in foreign languages that mean something completely different to what they thought it did.

Yeah, they don't know, do they? So mega profit. Might as well just have called it like Icebox or something. Drugship. Drugship. Yeah. Have you ever thought about that? Because you name your boat

When you buy it don't you Yeah Yeah and then it's bad luck To change the name of a boat right Yeah I didn't know that Another reason I'll never own a boat I would have to be

So astronomically rich To be bothered by owning a boat Even a dinghy Or a little boat No interest No interest A kayak maybe That would be

The extent of my boat interest You'd get more Out of a dinghy than a kayak. You'd go on it once and be like, too much effort. Oh, yeah, I know, but that's why I can just get in and put it in the garage roof and forget about it. Like Hanya's stand-up paddleboard. FM.

This is so crazy that in LA there is a mural. It looks like it's on a little strip of a lot of murals. So it's in like an alleyway where lots of street artists have put up. Grammable murals. Okay. There's a few wings on the wall where you stand and then the wings come out. Oh, I've actually taken a photo of something like that before. And you stand in front of the wings and makes it look like you've got one.

It's like gram bait. That is absolute gram bait. Yeah, it's purely for that purpose. Yep. Now, on the street where there's other Grammable murals, there is a new one. So to look at it, it's like a little easier. Yep.

Covered in a blanket with a security guard sitting outside. What, like one of those things you take to the beach? Yeah. A gazebo? Yeah, yeah. So you can't see the mural? No. And there's a little sign by the security guard that says,

Private Mural for Verified Influencers and People with Over 20,000 Followers Only. So to get in to see it, you've got to have more than 20,000 Instagram followers. Yeah. Now, I think it's by an account called Like and Subscribe. Now, they've said, Today we're so excited to debut the beautiful mural we curated in the heart of the LA art scene. Come down and check it out.

Unfortunately, the mural is currently for verified influencers and people with over 20k followers only. However, it may be made public soon. Stay tuned.

How elitist is that? But that's the idea of it, right? It's creating that exclusivity or whatever. And you yeah, and then people who don't have that many followers really want to and it creates a bit of a buzz around it.

And then also has the huge potential to backfire and make you look like a big pack of wank. Yeah. Do you want to know what it actually is? What the mural's of? Yeah. Oh, I thought you said it's of wings. No, that was another one on the street. It was like pink wings. This one is

blue. It's got a... Oh, it's so bad. I'll show you. The whole background is blue. There's a pink heart with wings coming out of it. A verified tick above it and it says City of Angels. No. Oh, that's a bit rubbish. Oh, you'd get a photo.

I mean, your chair and mural was way better than that. But that's not even, the murals on the rest of the strip are way better than that. Yeah. You'd get in there and be like, oh. You don't need that blue tick. No. You don't need that to tell you you're doing all right. You're not missing out on much.

Okay? You don't need that in your life. No. At all. But it would be pretty cool to have a blue tick, though, eh? Oh, yeah. I don't know why I don't need that in your life. No. At all. But it would be pretty cool to have a blue tick though, eh? Yeah, I don't know why I don't have one. It's real me. No, I don't

care that I don't have a blue tick but then I see some people with a blue tick I'm like, what are you doing with a blue tick? Not because it comes from my point of why do you have one and I don't. It's more just like, why did they need a blue tick? Because the blue ticks to, you know, this is definitely them.

They've proven that's them. Yeah, yeah. By providing photo identification. This is Tom Cruise. It's not someone pretending to be Tom Cruise. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or a huge celebrity. But I don't know if like a player for the Otago Highlanders needs a blue tick.

Do you know what I mean? Then you know that it's the real player from the Otago Highlanders needs a blue tick. Do you know what I mean? Then you know that it's the real player from the Otago Highlanders, not just someone. Who's impersonating a New Zealand rugby player? I think somebody's jealous. I know, and I knew that you'd say this, but it's not coming from a state of jealousy.

It's coming from a state of confusion as to who would pretend to be that person. If I had a blue tick and I saw it, I'd be the same. I'd be like, who would pretend to be that dick? Do you know who's got a blue tick? We know a friend of the show, Matty McLean's got a blue tick and I saw it, I'd be the same. I'd be like, who would pretend to be that dick? Do you know who's got a blue tick? A friend of the show, Matty McLean's got a blue tick. Does he? He's got a blue tick.

Yeah, see, I don't know. He doesn't need one. Would you like to tell us? I love the guy. I've got a lot of love in my heart for Matty. Does he need one? Does he need one? Like Ryan Reynolds. Yes. For Maddie. But does he need one? Does he need one? Like Ryan Reynolds.

Yes. Anyone that plays with the Highlanders or Maddie McClain. Doesn't need one. No. Okay, right. Maybe it's just that New Zealand thing. Yeah, yeah. You're a New Zealander.

Talk a bit then and say that Taika Waititi. Yes. Blue Tick. Right. Who he needs. Jermaine Clement. Yep. Yes.

Okay. You know, Rhys Darby. Yes. These are people. Dan Carter Jermaine Clement. Yep. Yes. Okay. You know, Rhys Darby. Yes. These are people. Dan Carter. Dan Carter. Yes. I would say Dan Carter.

Yes. Yep. Okay. Oh, even some real high level All Blacks. Okay. I'd say yes. Yes. Right.

Okay. But I don't know if someone is definitely jealous. It's not jealous. I don't want one. I think it'd be so awkward. Oh, whatever. It was the same as Twitter. You had to supply a copy of your passport, right?

No, you don't have to do that. Sometimes they just give it to the people. Oh, they just give it to you. I just feel way too... Oh, you really wanted one of those, did you? I know. Oh, no, they promised they could get me one. But now I just feel like someone's got a copy of my passport.

I feel like I was tricked into that. Because I never got that bloody blue tick, did I? Why is it a blue tick? The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Imagine knowing that your World Cup was going to coincide with the Football World Cup? Poor planning. Poor planning. Absolute poor planning.

Brazil taking on Serbia at the moment after 26 minutes. Nil all. You're watching that on your parents' Sky password? See, I wish my parents paid for sport, but my parents are as tight as I am. Yeah. Because then occasionally there's very rarely I'd watch any sport, but every now and then there's something.

There's something, yeah. There's something on there. Well. Well, one of these six World Cups could be somewhere in there, as these are the six World Cups that are being overshadowed by the Football World Cup. Number six, the Foosball World Cup. Foosball, you know, we play soccer on a table.

Foosball World Cup's happening. Bet you didn't even know about it. And it sounds so similar. But they probably did that at the same time on purpose, right? Mm, don't know. Because it's like soccer and a table. Fursball World Cup's happening. Bet you didn't even know about it. And it sounds so similar. But they probably did that at the same time on purpose, right? Mm, don't I? Because it's like soccer on a table, Why don't you like fursball?

I love fursball. We played a lot of fursball there a few years ago. God, we went through some fursball tables. They buy a quality fursball table. Yeah, but even with the...

I get told off for spinning because I just want to spin and everyone's like, no spinners. No spinning. That's one of the rules, isn't it? It's easier.

Nothing's better than when you line it up and just boom, no defenders straight into it. That's good stuff. Okay. The first World Cup happening right now.

Okay. Number five on the list of the top six World Cups that have been overshadowed by the Football World Cup is the Fruise Ball World Cup. You know I love Fruise Balls. You do love Fruise Balls, yeah.

You know those little raw balls. Yeah. They're having a World Cup on who can make the best one. I think Megan's, it's just dawning on Megan that your list isn't actually... Right. It's not... Oh, you're right, I guess.

It was so much worse. So fruze balls. It has flavours, it's who makes them, and they advance through the finals and they win. Yeah. I mean, if the people who make fruise Balls need a marketing campaign at the moment, I'm willing to let you have that one. During this time of the Football World Cup, you do the Fruise Ball World Cup.

I just need all the Fruise Balls. Okay. Number four on the list of the top six World Cups that are being overshadowed by the Football World Cup. The World Cup of Cups. Like, what is a good cup? Because, Megan, you hate a cup that's straight up and down, don't you? Megan came into the studio yesterday and exclaimed, I don't like these up and down cups.

The standard ones, standard mugs that you're drinking out of. What I call a standard coffee cup. Those NZ Me branded cups are shithouse. I actually find them, they're a good girth. I like it's good girth. Do you like it wider at the top and thinner at the bottom? Well, that's preferable. Or I like it bulbous.

Then it's a mug. Yeah. So this is a cup. Well, that's a mug too, but then it's my idea of a mug. I think your definition of a mug needs some work. But see, that's the World Cup of Cups right now. We're involved in what's making it through. Yeah.

Brilliant. Number three on the top six World Cups that are being oversh involved in what's making it through. Brilliant. Number three on the top six World Cups that are being overshadowed by the Football World Cup is the World Cup of Worlds. As far as we know, we're the only competitor, but we are totally willing to accept

other entries. I know, but I'm always up for entering a competition that I can't lose. Number two on the list is the World Cup of Cup Worlds. It's a cup franchise, Cup World. You go in and there's all sorts of cups, ready, Bulbous cups, straight up and down cups. Megan was so excited for this list, by the way.

I really thought there was other World Cups going on. There are, and I'm listing them for you. I've given you five so far, but Cup World is a, yeah, it's a franchise cup company looking to always expand into new markets. So if you're, you, it's a franchise cup company looking to always expand into new markets. So if you're, you know, got a bit of capital and you want to invest in cups, then Cup World is for you. And the number one in today's top six of World Cups

that are being overshadowed by the Football World Cup. The World Cup of World Cups. What is the best World Cup? Is it the Football World Cup? Is it the Foolsball World Cup? Is it the World Cup of Cups? Or is it the World Cup of Is it the Football World Cup? Is it the Foolsball World Cup? Is it the World Cup of Cups? Or is it the World Cup of Worlds? We don't know.

It's quite meta-level to even get into that of it. But yeah, the World Cup of World Cups is number one on today's Top 6. So yesterday, I noticed that the home computer, the PC, it's not a PC. Yeah. It's an Apple. Yeah.

But they've got different sorts of keyboards, right? Because like what you've got right in front of you now is one of those big clickety clickety keyboards. Yeah. Big clunky one. This is more flat and the keys only just stick up above it. And there's metal between all the buttons and stuff. So I noticed that it was a little bit dirty because the kids are always just like sitting there and they don't know how to use it properly.

And then I'd grab the mouse. And there's bits of food between the keys. Yep. Okay. So I was like, I'm going to clean that. It's bothering me that I can see that that's dirty. Okay. So first of all, I cleaned the screen of the computer.

Okay. That went well. Okay. Right. Very well. Right. But then I went to clean the keyboard and I remember hearing you don't use a damp, you don't use a wet cloth.

I'll just do a damp. I'll just do a damp. I've always rusted, and it's fine. We've got these things that are like wet wipes, but they're not as wet as wet wipes. Semi-wet wipes. Like an antibacterial wipe. Yeah, yeah, kind of like that.

It's not what I would call, I would call it lightly moistened. A damp. Damp wipe. It's not damp. It's not even that damp. Okay. Like you could leave it out and it would dry probably in, you know, they come in the tube thing.

So I'm like, this is the ideal candidate. For wiping the keyboard. For wiping the keyboard. So I unplug the keyboard and then I wipe it with this thing. And I'm frantically wiping. Wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe. Getting the finger in. Wipe, wipe it with this thing, and I'm frantically wiping. Wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe, getting the finger in. Wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe, all the gaps. I want all the keys clean as well, because the keys are dirty, because they're white

keys, so everything's clean. I'm like, this looks great. Plug it back in, and it doesn't work anymore. Now, I don't know if it's not working because of the thrashing I gave it. Right. But that's no different than typing. Frantically typing. Yeah.

Like a really angry email. Yeah. That sort of action. Yeah. And I didn't know, maybe some moisture had seeped in. So I put it in the hot water cupboard overnight. Okay. Classic.

Yeah. And then this morning before I left for work, I was just like, I've got an eye and I plugged it in and it didn't, it's still not working. Okay. Classic. Yeah. And then this morning before I left for work, I was just like, I've got an eye and I plugged it in and it's still not working. Yeah. That's weird. I've cleaned it and effectively broken it. Well, you've got water in there and it's shorted it out probably, hasn't it?

That was the general consensus between myself and my wife last night. Well, you've ruined that, haven't you? Well, I was trying to clean it. I wanted it to be clean. You were just trying to help. I was trying to help. You're the victim here. I am the victim here.

Me and the keyboard. Victims. Victims. Of trying. Yeah. And again, tick that up to don't try. Don't try. You can't fail.

Yeah. But if you try, often you'll let yourself down. And you'll fail. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So try, you can't fail. Yeah. But if you try often, you'll let yourself down. And you'll fail. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So try, try, try again. Don't, don't, never do.

Yeah. Vornal quite often say in a meeting, this is why I don't try. Yeah. This is why we don't try. If someone doesn't come off, you say, this is why you don't try. You set yourself up for failure every time. I'd like to know what you've, you know, had the best of intentions with cleaning and broken it.

Right. Because this is like the time I was trying to clean the mirror and I was frantically rubbing the mirror and this thing that held it on the wall broke and the mirror fell off and smashed. Again, don't try. Leave it dirty. Yeah.

Because you can see in a dirty mirror, you can't see in a broken one. Which, that sounds like a quote, right? That does sound like a quote, yeah. You can see in a dirty mirror, you can't in a broken one. Yeah. What's the moral, though? Who knows?

Just say it and somebody else will fill in the blanks. This is why it would be horrible being, imagine making a cleaner of someone's, like, place and they've got, like these like vases or like artworks and you're just like doing your job cleaning oh dusting around the show i couldn't do it i couldn't trust myself because i'm sloppy i'm messy just like dust dust yeah yeah aggressive dusting i'd break stuff i scratched the tv while dusting once how do you do that? Well, the duster had a sharp bit hidden inside the duster. It was like the thing that held all

the fake feathers, the synthetic, fibury things that stick out. At the end, it was metal and I was just like dusting the TV and it just scratched across the TV. Gosh, I was so disappointed in myself. I was angry. I was like, what have you done?

Again, don't cry if you hadn't bothered cleaning. No, I know. Because there was a little bit of the TV where it sinks back into the screen from the frame. Dust sits in there because I'm guessing some static attracts it or something. And it was quite dusty. I was like, oh, get in there. And I got in and I scratched the TV. So disappointed.

Oh, my gosh. What have you done? And you say to yourself, it was just a mistake. Mistakes happen. Like, no, they don't. Not to me. Yeah, give yourself a dressing down in the middle of the lounge. So I'd like to know with best intentions when you're trying to clean something

and you broke it. And also, where do you get a new keyboard? That'd be a handy follow-up. Just a side help. Super handy follow-up. Oh, 800-DARLS-NM-E-K-T-E-X-9-6-9-6. When was cleaning not a good idea? When did you break something from cleaning is what we're asking this morning because

I don't have a keyboard that works on a computer at home anymore. Well, you used it. Your cloth was too wet. That's what I believe, yeah. Yeah. Chemical. But I unplugged it. That's the thing. But then, oh, yeah, your cloth was too wet. That's what I believe, yeah. Yeah. But I unplugged it, that's the thing. But then, yeah, I don't know. I can't explain computer stuff.

So we want to know from you when it all went poorly. My mum took the oven door off, reads this text message, so we could clean the whole oven. I've had that too because the door comes down but then the door's in the way and you've got to climb right into an oven. You've got to get right in there. And so we took the oven door off and leant it against the bench,

and then it slid down off the bench and hit the ground and exploded. And glass went boosh. You have to get a new oven, wouldn't you? Yeah. Apparently they did. They got a whole new oven. That's easier than cleaning. Yeah.

But then they had spent, they cleaned the oven. Oh, that was. So they wasted the whole morning cleaning. Yeah. When they just had spent, they cleaned the oven. Oh, that was... So they wasted the whole morning cleaning. Yeah. When they just went out and bought a new oven. How bad would your oven have to be before you just buy a new oven?

Not very bad. Well, how much is an oven? They've come down in price. Have they? Yeah. If you won Lotto, like one of those big 20 million Powerball things,

Yeah. would, do you reckon you'd get that lazy? You'd be like, I've got to clean the oven. There's $600. But if you wouldn't, You'd get that lazy You'd be like I've got to clean the oven There's $600 But if you wouldn't You'd get someone to clean it Oh yeah that's true

Yeah I don't want to Buy a new oven And just get someone else To do the gross parts of my life That would be one of the first things I'd pay someone to do Clean your oven Clean the oven

How often are you supposed to do that I don't know I've never done it Our oven's got a self-clean function, but all it does is it heats itself up to an astronomically high temperature. But it doesn't work. Right.

Doesn't it just bake it on even more? Anything that's baked on, it just bakes it on and it makes it easier. It just crumbles off. Right. But everything that's like a stain, no, no. Okay, right. No, no, you silly function.

You're not doing anything. Awesome. Other text messages. I water blasted my ute because I couldn't be bothered using a sponge. Now I have a T space space Ota ute as I blew the O and the Y off on the tailgate of the ute. What kind of water blaster is that? I've water blasted a car before and taken a badge off too. Okay.

And the wing mirror, the little mirrory bit. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if I'm meant to be that much pressure. Somebody else said, I was vacuuming and I dented the fridge door. That's aggressive vacuuming.

I always run my vacuum cleaner into the corners of the wall. I'm very aggressive. Mark's a skirting, doesn't he? Yeah. Mark's a skirting. He can be very, very quick. I can imagine you vacuuming.

No time. Just super quick. I know. Smashing into everything. And then I get to the end of my hall and there's like half a metre that I can't reach. Always just leave it. Because I don't want to go unplug it. Unplug it.

I can do my whole apartment apart from the one metre by my door. Yeah. Front door. Doesn't matter. It's good. It's a grubby. It's the less used metre. Exactly. Hardly anybody sees it once they're in good. It's a grubby, it's the less used meter. Exactly.

Hardly anybody sees it once they're in. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, I'm not the only one. Plenty of people ruining things by cleaning. So keyboard shopping

after the show? Yeah, reluctantly. You're not going to go home and try one more time though? Yeah, I am going to because people are like, it's got to be plugged in while you turn your computer

on and off. Which sounds like bull. But is it? Give it a go. Give it a go. Give it a go. This is why. Fat. This is why.

Fat. This is why. This is why. This is why. Fat. And it's not the breakfast buffets. No. From holidays.

No, I'm going to ask Genity about that. If they had one of those on Heartbreak Island. It's a Fijian Island classic. The breakfast buffet. You load up in the morning. You don't need lunch. That's the plan, Dad. But it never works.

Just makes you hungrier for lunch because you've stretched your tummy. This is in Australia. And we don't get this brand of chips in New Zealand. They're Smith's chips. They're massive in Australia. I've seen, they're like their Bluebird or Eater, aren't they? Yeah. Recently, semi-recently, they actually added the apostrophe at the end of Smith's.

Oh, they didn't have one? Previous to that, it was just the plural of the world's greatest surname. But now it's the possessive. It's their crisps that you can purchase from them. They've got a new flavour on the market.

These guys have done heaps of different wacky flavours over the years. And it must be in conjunction with Pizza Hut because the Pizza Hut box features on the front of the Purple Smith's bag of crisps, garlic bread flavoured crisps. Why has nobody done a garlic bread flavoured or just garlic chip?

I know. How would you? Wait a minute, I saw this and I was like, why has there never been a garlic chip? Because it's a perfect flavour. There's rosemary and garlic in those fancy ones. Oh, yeah, them fancy-ass chips. They've branched out and tried some stuff.

How would you harness the flavour of bread and butter? I reckon it's just butter. I reckon it's just the... Like buttery garlic. Yeah, buttery garlic. And it's synonymous. You don't often combine butter and garlic on carbohydrates unless it's bread. Or maybe a mashed

tato, but this would be a bit more bready. Do we know anybody coming back from Australia? PJ's coming back from Hawaii. Isn't PJ taking the longest way to Bali possible? She's coming back to Australia to go to Bali? Yeah, back to New Zealand. Because her boyfriend lives in Wellington.

I don't know. What, is he incapable of flying by himself? I don't know, boy. He looks like a big lad. I'm sure he can work it out. There was some reason for it. But she's back here this weekend. Can you ask her to bring a packet? Smith's Garlic Bread Chippies.

I will. She will have been sent a promo pack. Tell her that we need it more than they do. And bring it back. They sound delicious. I mean, garlic bread can't be beaten. Nothing rules more than you having a barbecue and what? Nothing rules more.

Nothing rules more. That rules, man. That rules, man. Look, nothing's more ruly bodacious, dudes. Give me a break. Nothing rules more. I'm excited. And now you've ruined it.

Sorry. Nothing rules more than you're at. And now you've ruined it. Sorry. Nothing rules more than you're at a barbecue and you've kind of loaded up your plate. And then someone's like, oh, I forgot the garlic bread. And you're like, yes! Because I've loaded up my plate. Oh, I thought you meant they forgot it all. But you meant it's like in the oven. It's in the oven.

Or they get it out and it's one of those ones from the supermarket and there's not enough buttery garlic in between the slices. Yeah, everybody's got a favourite brand garlic bread. Like my mum goes for those little short stubby ones that come in a pack or two about that long. They've got an Italian dude on the front who's like, and it's foil and plastic. Yeah, foil and then plastic. I can't remember the name of those.

Do they put a lot of butter in? My wife goes for those big long ones. Oh, yeah. Because see, the bread's crusty rather than soggy. No, I want a soggy bread. No, I want a crusty bread. Lightly crusty, not super crusty. Inside soggy.

But then that one that I'm talking about comes as a loaf, but it's cut in half and it's got wax paper separating it and oodles of butter. Oh, good. You've got to put lots in. Oodles of butter. Yeah. Oh, good Lord.

Good. Yeah, man, garlic bread. Okay. Well, garlic bread flavoured potato chips. That had no reason. We're a bunch of fatties. Fat. This is why.

Fat. This is why. This is why. This is why. Fat. FEM. City. Chile start for the country today, the coldest place in the country right now.

Minus 1.9. Rotorua. Minus 1.9. Rotorua. Minus 1.9. Minus 1.9. The warmest place, Christchurch. The Port Hills rating, 9.7. It's like 9 in Dunedin. That's a summer already.

Summer for Dunedin. Summer for Dunedin already. Yeah, might be working its way around from the UK because they're getting a heat wave. The hottest place and they're just like, this is unbelievable. And Wales

was 30 degrees yesterday. And the Welsh have actually begun to melt. I've got friends that live there and also that are holidaying there at the moment and it looks amazing. Like blue sky's been

nice for a few weeks. Yeah, I know. Which is unheard of. They're freaking out. Yeah. And we like joke about it and stuff, but a lot of old people actually perish in the heat. Because they're

not. In the UK, they've just. Climatised to it. They're just not used to it. Yeah. But that's nothing. What would you expect? Because I've never been there. Like, what would you expect to be your high in summer? Mid-twenties? If you're lucky. Is that a really nice day? Like, early twenties? Right. Would that be your average? Yeah.'re lucky. Is that a really nice day? Early 20s?

Right. Would that be your average? Yeah. Early 20s. So they're just absolutely melting. Like 18 degrees and singlets are out. Yeah. Like they are just not used to heat in any form.

Well, I didn't know this, but this is, and for people who maybe listen to the show or the podcast online, this is something to know. If you're in the UK, I might be able to get you out of work. What? Because it's too hot? Yes. Legally, in the UK, if you're working in an office and you're at a desk

and the office has no way of controlling air temperature, if it reaches 30 degrees, you get to go home. And it's even better if you're doing manual work, indoors manual work so working in a warehouse or anything with a roof over your head if it gets to 27 degrees you can go home.

What about if you're outside? Like you're a builder? It's weird because I can't find a maximum when you're outside. Because that would be a manual worker you could say a manual worker is outside. And here's the other thing about working outside. Employers can reschedule work to cooler times of the day. So like at night?

Yeah, well, we're going to work from 6 in the morning till 9. Then we're going to take a break. We're going to come back at 4 in the afternoon. We're going to work through till 9 again. But how often are you in an office here in New Zealand and it'll easily feel like it's like 27, 28, 29? I don't know. There's got to be, I mean, this is crazy.

This is great, you know, ammo to go into our summer with. I don't think that's happening. Knowing the ways to get out of work. Can you imagine if this was like a thing in Australia? Like that gets insane, insanely hot over there. They wouldn't be able to have that. Yeah, I think my brother's kids couldn't go to school one day because the air conditioning was broken, and it was in February.

And they just said, oh, don't even bother sending them because their air con unit's shit itself. They get close to 40, though, right? Yeah, they get to 40 regularly. We were at that place, and it was 43 degrees outside. So I just Googled the average high temperature in London from June through August is about 21 degrees. And the average low is 12.

Right. So for them to get like 30, 27, 28, 30. It's getting up there. They're just like, what's happening? Right. Yeah. It's crazy. I love that this same thing that tells you about working, you know, and the temperatures and stuff that are safe.

Yeah. They talk about how important it is to drink water, especially in hot conditions. And also, don't be in the sun for too long. That can lead to sunburn and then tells you what sunburn is. Like, it's real. Did you see when you're in Thailand, lots of British tourists that were red? So many!

So many! They're so red, don't they? From a distance you're like, oh, that guy's wearing a singlet. And you get there and he's not. It's just he was and he got really badly burned. So bad. You're like, did you even try with sunscreen? Yeah.

No. That even calls out freckly people. It's like if you're freckled or fear, please be very careful. You're more prone to burn. Things that we know. We've got a few months to go. FBM. Okay. I'm going to try and remain calm

To get my point across for this break So that I don't get called a Man-hater on the text There was a pro-surfing Competition that happened in South Africa See my calm voice? Pro-surfing And two winners were Put up, a picture was put up of

The female winner and the male winner They put it on Facebook. The winner, the male winner, won 8,000 rand, which is equivalent to like 800 in New Zealand. Right. The female won 4,000 rand, 400 New Zealand dollars. Half as much. Both are pretty stink prize monies.

Well, yeah, for winning a tournament, a competition, sure. Yeah, yeah. So that's when the photo got put up and a lot of people on Facebook expressed their disappointment. Blatant inequality billabong the sponsors of this

pro-surfing. I hope your clothes are half the price for women if this is the case. That's a good call. And also made often of half the material. But in that, I often think I'm overpaying for board shorts. That's it. And what an absolute bloody rule. Would you like your board shorts to be half the material,

just have some holes maybe in the ass area? I think for everybody else's sake, no. No, okay. I just want them to be half the price. Right. Did the girls surf a different ocean that was easier we didn't know about? This is pathetic. I'm sorry, this is actually disgusting.

I'm outraged. I was there. I watched the whole day these girls shred just as hard as any boy. They surfed the same ocean, did they not? Which leads me to the question, why were they not paid the same? Why was the prize money not the same?

Which led me to say, I'm not, and I haven't seen, I've looked really hard. I tried to find footage of this. Okay. To see if the skill level was vastly different. Surely that's the same. My answer to that was, it doesn't matter what the skill level was, the prize money was set before that. True, but then the prior competitions would have set a skill level precedent of what is expected, right?

Yeah. But they're already going to that competition. So a skill level precedent of what is expected, right? Yeah. But they're already going to that competition. So their skill level already has to be. It should be the same. Well, if it's only 800 bucks, it should be the same. A female is putting in as much effort to get to that point, if not more, with their physical, you know, physicality than a male. It's a problem, problem though that men surfing,

because it's maybe been around longer, is bigger and gets more attention, it gets more prize money? I'm not saying that that's why it should be, but it's much like rugby, right? Yeah. Also, what would be the commercial reward for billabong? Would more of their money come from guys spending money or girls? Because that's another thing I'm kind of...

What? I don't know. I would say it would be equal, though. The stores are like half and half, aren't they? Yeah. I don't know. But I've always thought billabong was way more of a guys... You're buying billabong bikinis and togs and...

Okay, I didn't know that they did... Boardies and rashies and... Yeah. Especially, like, the women have to enter the competition with surfboards, with all the same gear. They're spending probably the similar amount of money. They're training just as hard. Explain to me.

Somebody's messaged in a very good point. Why are there even female and male? Why isn't everybody just competing in the same pool or ocean? Thank you. Good water pun. Well, because I don't think anyone's arguing that the physicality of men and women is very different. That's a major thing in sport. Of course it's very different.

We have different bodies. But women are putting in just as much effort and are at higher risk of injury than men because of the way our bodies are built. So there's more at risk and you would argue more effort being put in for women to reach this target, but yet not being paid the same. Yeah, Vaughan. And the reason that people watch more men's sport on TV is probably because that's the way that it's always been. It always depends what sport. Like volleyball.

I've got absolutely no interest in watching men's volleyball. Not for me. But I can see that it certainly has a lot of appeal for some people. But it's growing, and the only way it can grow is if you support women by giving them money to compete in the same way. Because in 2015, I know that it was in US and they're not huge football people,

but the Women's Football World Cup got more, it was the highest rating than any other football tournament in the US. Do the US ever make the Football World Cup final? No, it was like the US. Oh, the US. Do the US ever make the football World Cup final? No, it was like the US. Oh, the US finals. Yeah. Oh, the Women's World Cup final.

Was it in the US? No, no. It would have been worldwide. Right. But then the US have never made the World Cup final. In men's. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. So then you can't compare because you don't have the right viewership. You're still watching men. You're saying men's sport garners more than women. So more people in the US watch the female football World Cup final than watch the men's. Than watch any other men's football game ever. Including foreign teams playing.

Like your average World Cup that the Americans or only that the Americans have been in? And I know football in the US is not as big. But there was still like 20 something million people watching it. This women's game of football. I just don't understand. You've got to support women

with the pay equality to get to the same level. I'm not disagreeing. Somebody messaged in, and I don't think it's the case in this situation because this was a billabong tournament, so surely the prize money, and it's not that much prize money.

It wasn't that much, but it's not really the point. They said when they've organised competitions, is the prize money is a direct result of how many people enter in that. So the men's have always got more prize money because more entry fees are paid, more men enter so their prize pool's bigger. But I don't think that's the situation in this case.

That might be the case in like a small surfing club. Yeah, yeah. Because there were so many comments on the Facebook page. They did I think it was Billabong or the organisers responded and they said the World Surf League is the governing and sanctioning body of the event that determine all prize money in rankings.

We've brought this to their attention for further comment, but nothing at the moment. Just think if it's only that, yeah, I don't know, whatever. It's not enough money. It's not enough money for anybody. Make it more and make it equal. And make it equal. Yeah. We can agree on that.

Can we? Yeah. Yeah, I've never had a problem with that. For make it equal. Yeah. We can agree on that. Can we? Yeah. Yeah, I've never had a problem with that. For surfing, sure. Yeah. For anything. For everything else. Well, it depends. To me, it depends, like, on wages and stuff for equality.

Like, with sponsors and stuff, you kind of can't tell private companies what to do with their money. That's up to them, and then that reflects badly on them. Isn't a lot of sponsorship individual anyway? Like, Dan Carter earns way more because he's got individual sponsorships and stuff. Yeah, yeah. So, like, isn't the sponsorship more individual? Oh, yeah, sponsorship's completely different to a base wage. But, like, base salary.

I think a base salary should be the same. Be the same for everyone. Totally. Okay. That's because who did that? Was it Football New Zealand or was it Rugby New Zealand that made the base salary the same? I think it was Rugby New Zealand, wasn't it? Rugby New Zealand, yeah.

Yeah. Okay. All right. Well, we can move on now. Momentarily. I'm just shocked that it was only $800 New Zealand dollars. Someone had to get to South Africa. Yeah.

You can't get to South Africa for $800. Yeah. Rubbish. Yeah. Spy.co.nz Kim K announced just days ago that she was overtaking selfies. She said, it's not all about sitting there, taking selfies. I just like to live there in real life.

I don't mind pictures, but I'm just not on my phone like I used to be. Dangerous move, because then you've stated you're not going to do selfies anymore. And then a couple of days later, she was kneeling on her floor in a perfectly arranged wardrobe with the caption WTP. WTP. Could be what's the point or it could be another thing from a song. Right. Work that P word.

Positioning. Positioning, yes. In the wardrobe, yeah. And so obviously she's been called a hypocrite and all kinds of things. Okay. Because she said she wasn't going to do it anymore. And Cardi B's baby shower was not like a backyard affair

or like a high tea or anything. It was like a full-on club night in the club partying. And she was partying just as hard as anyone else. Also she had a baby shower which included a two and a half thousand dollar bassinet, American, completely covered in gold leaf

which costed an extra thousand dollars, a battery powered mini Bentley and a baby cook set. Like some of the stuff at this baby shower was insane. Well, she's got money now, so why not? Yeah, but she doesn't pay for that. Everyone else pays for that.

That's why she was gifted. When you get money, I'm assuming you start making friends with people who also have money. Yeah, right. Well, she's due in July, so we've only got a few weeks to wait. I can't wait to start making some money and get some friends that ain't broke-ass. That is spy for more. You can go to ZM online. Are you not happy with your standard of presents from us?

I can't think of a present. I gave you that lemon tree and you killed it. Luigi. I don't know. I can't keep a citrus alive for the life of me. I've given a mini lime tree that thing. I don't know. I can't keep a citrus alive, eh, for the life of me. I've given a mini lime tree that thing died to. How do you expect to make friends if you can't keep a citrus tree alive?

It's quite a metaphor, isn't it? Isn't it? F.E.M. We just heard in Spy that Kim Kardashian said she was done with selfies. She was over with selfies. And then the very next day posted a selfie. Yeah. And it quickly turned to ragging on Caitlyn, which a lot of stuff around here does. I don't even know how it happens.

Behind the scenes. Because we basically said Kim K with her selfies is like Caitlin with dating apps. We hear that she's over it, but then she asks us for help talking to someone on Bumble. I like, I hate it. So I'll go on it and then I'll be like, oh, this is so dumb. I don't want to hear these dumb conversations. I'd love to see the stats on how many times the average person deletes a dating app and then re-downloads it.

Oh, my God. Because that's the thing. You're like, oh, this is dumb. And I can't just leave it on my phone. I've got to delete it. So I delete it and then I'm like, I'm going to download Bumble again. I'm drunk. I'm surprised to hear that.

I thought you'd just chuck it in a folder on the third page and turn off notifications. Nah. I always delete it and then you've obviously got to be like within Wi-Fi to download it again. And then, yeah. Because it remembers that you've downloaded it before, so it's like, here we are.

It's in the cloud. Yeah. Can we go to McDonald's? He's like, you're hungry. Like, no, I need that free Wi-Fi to download Bumble. How many times in the last year do you think you've done that? I don't want to say. It's embarrassing.

Like? Like more than 10? Okay, more than 10. This is the thing. You wouldn't be alone. This is what I'm saying. I'd love to see the stats on it. I'm just so cold with it.

I'm like, no, yuck, get away. And then like two days later, I'll be like, but fun, cuddles. Everyone would do that. Yeah. So how many times then? No, like with this year, like from January, probably like four or five times. Okay. Just to lead it up.

So averaging like one a month. Yeah. It just depends how I'm feeling. Yeah. And if I'm watching Love Island. Yeah, totally. It depends what programs I'm watching and also what my friends are doing.

And like, I don't know. What my friends are doing. You know, better relationships. All that sort of thing. But not just strictly to dating apps. I was wondering this morning, what you can't say no to. What you're always like, I'm off it. I've sworn off it.

I'm done. I'm done. I'm done with that. I'm done with that. And then you find yourself snaking back in there. Like the dating apps. Like where the dating apps can put selfies. It's hard though.

Like I try not to swear off anything because I know I'm weak. Like I know that I'll crawl back to it. I don't say out loud that I'm doing anything because then I have to stick to it. They say that if you do want to swear off something and you wanted, you meant to tell everybody, aren't you? Yeah, like when I did no chips, I told

everybody because then I literally had to do it. Because if I ever got caught eating a chip anywhere people would be like, ah. Yeah. But you actually did swear off hot chips for a whole year. You did it. That's the only thing I've ever... But you've come crawling back.

Stuck to... Oh, yeah, there was an end time on that. Yeah, there was a one-time, limited-time offer. See, what you want to hear from people that, yeah, what's their... Would you be right in saying, what's your Achilles heel? Like, your weakness? You always swear off. You're like, no, no more.? Would you be right in saying what's your Achilles heel? Like your weakness? You always swear off.

You're like, no, no more. And then you're back. I'd imagine like smokers would be. Oh, yeah. Same with booze and smoking. Yeah. Oh, Caitlin's another shocker for that. Never drinking again.

How many times have you said that this year alone? Every time I drink. Like every next morning I'm like, oh, I'm never drinking again. Makes like the announcement. Yeah. In her hungover state thinking that it's going to keep her off it. But she's straight back in there. Would that include my one like online shopping website?

Like I'm not supposed to be shopping and I'm like, I'm staying off, I'm staying off. And then I'm like, I'll just get a little, I'll just look. I'll just have a little look. Just a little look at the sale, but I won't put anything in there. Like I can't I literally can't Stay off this one website You're not like shopping

Right You're just going for a look Yeah Okay She's shopping She's shopping She always ends up in something Alright so

0800DARLS.M You can text 9696 What can't you stay away from? We're talking about What you can't say no to, though. Kim Kardashian said she was off selfies and then posted one the very next day. It's an addiction and addiction is real. It is.

So we want to know what you, you know, you swear off. You say, no, no more. And then you find yourself doing it again. I love this one. Someone said, I'm a war hammer fiend. You know those little tabletop war games with the little models? No. You know, and you line your dudes up and you roll the dice

and that's so many moves and you've got points and you have a little war. No, I don't know what you're talking about. The little war things. Anyway, they swore off them. You know, don't you? But goodness me, I walked past and I saw a Death Guard model and I was like, oh, I've got it.

And then I bought it and I was like, what am I doing with my life? Went home and painted it. I just love that someone's biggest problem in their life is I just can't say no to cute little plastic things. Yeah, that's not a bad problem,

is it? It's not like alcohol. No. Yeah. Dairy, someone said. I'm allergic to it but every time I go to the supermarket

I sneak a pixie caramel. The next day I'm itchy, irritated. You know, is it worth it? I could not imagine being allergic to chocolate. Same thing. I just live in

a constant itchiness. Yeah, it'd be an itchy life. So they said it's the same with a wheel of cheese. Oh, see,

I can't say anything. Oh, cheese. I'll swear off like a whole wheel of camembert. You'd just be like, camembert, antihistamine.

Would that work? You'd have a cracker and it would have a cracker and camembert. You'd just be like, camembert, antihistamine. Would that work? You would have a cracker, and it would have a cracker and camembert, and then antihistamine, and then a bit of brie, because you've got to hide your pills in cheese. That's what I learned about my dog. Yeah. Anne-Marie, what can't you say no to? Cups, like bread and rice and pasta.

Oh, yeah, girl. But you kind of need those. It's like, yeah, you do, don't you? Isn't that what made our brains good or something? Yeah, it feeds your brain. But then, like, how much bread? Because if you're sitting down eating a whole loaf. So I'm supposed to eat only, like, 21 grams of net carbs

because I follow a keto diet, or I'm supposed to. Okay. But I just can't do it. It's just bread and cake and everything. Oh, how good is cake? Once you eat a slice of bread, you're like, well, I've ruined it now. How many? You're like, no, that's it. This day's ruined.

How much cake would you get for 21 grams of carbs net? Nothing. You get like. Like a breath of cake. Like you might be able to suck up a couple of crumbs. You get like a smell of cake. A smell of cake. Breathe it in.

Anne-Marie, thanks for your call. Thanks for the hug. Dig, what can't you say no to? Oh, mate. Blue V and the chicken nuggies from BP. The southern style chicken bites. Oh, mate, you're onto it. Yeah.

Sometimes the mac and cheese ones as well. I haven't had those, but yeah, every time. Oh, mate, you've got to get onto it. Every time we stop, the southern style bites. They're a dollar each. God, they really chew through your wallet, but yeah, every time we stop, the Southern Style Bites, they're a dollar each. God, they really chew through your wallet, but they're so delicious. Oh, bloody yikes. I get up at about 3 a.m. and I'm like, right, I'm not bloody stopping today. And I'm driving past BP Rolleston.

I'm Snapchatting everyone. Look, there goes BP. I'm not stopping. And then you get to Timaru and you're like, oh, getting pretty hungry. Getting pretty hungry. Getting pretty tired. Going to smash back some nuggies and a Blue Bee and then I'll ping and parade. And then you get the bloody regrets

and you're like, oh, and then everyone's like, oh, Dig has failed again. I'm like, oh, no. Don't set yourself that standard. Maybe, could you have breakfast at home, Dig, before you leave? You could, but they're not nuggies, are they? You know, he's got a very good point.

Hey, thanks, you cool, Dig? No dramas, Bill. Some other messages in, and someone raises a very good point. You've got to hit rock bottom. Yeah, okay. You've got to hit rock bottom, and I hit rock bottom. I used to delete Tinder, get it back, delete it, get it back. I'm a high-rank hit rock bottom. Yep. I used to delete Tinder, get it back, delete it, get it back.

I'm a high-ranking school official. Right. I'm assuming that's like... Principal. Principal. Okay. And one day this year, I got the app back and I went on Tinder and one of the dodgiest parents from the school came up. Right.

That was the moment I hit rock bottom. Right. Okay. I got sick to the stomach because he must have, like, matched. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Or she must have matched them. Yep. And they were like, I've hit rock bottom.

That's my rock bottom. I'm out. Deleted it. I actually cancelled my entire account and I haven't been back on since. Right. So that's, I think everybody's got to find their rock bottom. Okay. I mean, I don't know what the rock bottom is of, like, the dairy allergy.

What do you, like, die or something? Yeah. I ate so much cheese I died. I found my rock bottom. Special guest joining us in studio this morning, Genity from Heartbreak Island. Good morning. Morning, guys. How are you? Great. Thank you very much. Eliminated last night. How are you feeling? I am feeling okay. It was a bit hard, I guess, watching the episode back.

But I'm pretty proud with how I handled myself. Didn't cry. Have you watched all the episodes back? We just watched them with everyone else. Right. Yeah, but that's what I mean. You sit down and watch them when they're on. I couldn't watch myself. Neither. I'd be like, oh, why did I say that?

My worst is that I obviously use hand gestures. Like, I've got my hands down here right now. Like, I speak with my hands and I do this weird thing with my neck. And I'm like, oh, my God, why am I doing that? What's the weird thing with your neck? I look like a thumb. I'm like, why do I keep doing that? I'm like, are you gesticulating?

Gesticulating. That's what I said. That's what I said, gesticulating. So I'm always very careful when saying gesticulating gesticulating last time I said testiculating so I'm always very careful when saying gesticulating but there's nothing wrong with that that's fine

can we talk about the first episode because watching that back was it was ruthless yeah no that was ruthless um

I assume you're talking about catfish yeah in your mind you were second popular girl right second most popular girl and, you were second popular girl, right? Second most popular girl. And you were unaware of filming it

that it was anything other than that. And then watching it back, they were all calling you a catfish. Yeah. I'm not going to lie. I was watching the episode. It was the first episode. I was with my best friends and my family.

And the look on their faces was probably the worst for me. Like, I've got thick skin, and I knew going on that TV show that I was a curvier girl. I knew that there was going to be backlash about it, but I kind of wanted to go on there to be like, you know what, I am curvy, I'm not a size 6, but I'm proud of who I am. So that was what I went on there for and to prove.

So in a way, it's kind of worked out in my favour. I personally don't think I'm a catfish. I think I'm great looking. So I'm fine with that, you know, and me personally, I wouldn't just meet someone and go, you're a catfish. I'd get to know them first. That's me as a person.

And that shows on the show. I didn't, those boys didn't look like their pictures, but you don't see me calling them a catfish. So I guess it just, that's just what shows. So yeah, it hurt, but you don't see me calling them a catfish. So I guess that's just what shows. So yeah, it hurt, but in a way, it gives me more of a leg to stand on to be proud and say, you know what, you may think that, but I love myself.

In defence of the show a little bit, and for what you're saying, you were second most popular and they called you a catfish and then Ella didn't get any votes from any of the guys guys but then give it like what, two hours a day and everyone had switched anyway

and found things about each other that they actually liked. So that just goes to show that dating apps and everything, it's not it is deceiving. As soon as you get to know someone they become more attractive because of their personality. Would you agree? 100%. Tevita went from the least popular guy to probably one of the most popular guys.

The most popular guy went to probably the most unpopular-est guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So 100%, it changes. And that's why you should never judge a book by its cover. And I think the TV show got a lot of like bad comments about, you know, like rating them.

But I think it was trying to prove, you know, a point. Like that's how we actually work. We go on Tinder, we go on Bumble or whatever there is and we go, that person looks nice, that person looks nice, but we don't actually get to know the person. And so the show does like, yes, that's a big kind of bang and New Zealand was like, what's going on? But then you actually get to know everyone's personalities,

people swap, people change. So Tevita. Tell us. I noticed you're just dropping his name in there. So have you seen him since the show's ended? Yep. No, like, we've definitely caught up and stuff. But he lives over in Australia.

Okay. Are we going to see anything happen on the Friday night episode? The uncut? Um. Because we didn't, you are not shy about your feelings about him. Yeah. But, like, we haven't seen anything happen. Yeah.

Intimate between you two. Yeah. Did you guys kiss? Did you kiss him on the mouth? Well no because you say kiss and you can be like yes but it might not have been on the mouth. We went from this deep conversation

to like did you cuss? Did you cuss him? I cuss him maybe. No like I don't want my mum and dad to watch the uncut version. Okay. But, yeah, like, yeah. What's that when you go on a show like this,

and you say to your mum and dad, I'm going on a show like this, but there's going to be rules for them. Like, I'll tell you an episode that you shouldn't watch. Yeah. And, like, you're not allowed to watch the uncut one. Yeah. And are they like, oh, no, you've told me I'm not allowed to,

I want to? Well, like, if mum doesn't, like, it kind of goes two ways. If she watches it, oh no, you've told me I'm not allowed to, I want to? Well, if mum doesn't, it kind of goes two ways. If she watches it, she'll probably disown me. Or if she watches it, I'll disown her. Right. It's like a standoff. Yeah, it's like, so let's just not

watch it together. Let's just not watch it. Let's just continue to love each other. Are you going to watch it yourself? No. To see yourself? No, I'm not. I will be out at a BYO drinking wine and not watching the episode. Okay. Sometimes those BYOs have a TV

though and like, yeah, yeah, we'll put it on. No, no, no, no, no. Please don't. Well, we can see TVNZ2 uncut, Heartbreak Island 9.30 this Friday, tomorrow night and Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, TVNZ2 at 7.30. Thanks so much for coming in, Jenna.

Thanks for having me, guys. No worries. Curbier women, especially ones with bigger boobs, have troubles with lots of different aspects of life. And this new invention is going to make lazing in a pool a lot more comfortable. So what started as like an April Fool's Day joke, prank, they got such positive feedback from it, they are putting this into production. So it is a lilo with the head pillow. And then just down from the head pillow,

there is a gap, like an indentation. A recess in the lilo. Which they've written in their cup holders. And then the rest of the lilo goes back up and you can lie on it. So this is literally a hole where you can put your boobs when you're lying on your tummy. So when you're lying face down, your boobs go in there and they're not squished up against you.

Right. Yeah. Would the boobs be under the lilo? Like, do boobs float? They go with what you receive. If you were in a bath, though, are the boobs buoyant? Is there a buoyancy? Reasonably, yeah.

Like your genitals. Balls are buoyant For those who don't have balls Who may be interested Penises float don't they? They do Sometimes Yeah

Yeah But in my mind The older a man gets The more floaty his becomes But then women would be The other way around It's just sort of like Well it depends if there's

Air pockets that are able to Develop underneath Good lord Yes Caitlin do your Do your boobs float If you are in a pool Or a bath Tens of those air pockets are able to develop underneath. Good lord. Yes. Caitlin, do your boobs, right, if you are in a pool or a bath, are they more buoyant? Serious, I'm not being a serious question. No, I'm seriously trying to think of it because I don't know if they do.

No, like when you're in a bath. Because they do kind of float up. Yeah. Float? Well, mine are smaller than yours, too. They don't float. Heavy boobs is weighing in. I reckon my boobs would be like...

You're sick. Everybody else is like, you're that boy, and Anya's like, what? Mine are a swimming hazard. To the bottom of the floor. No. I honestly think my boobs would be like 5kgs just on their self. Each? No.

As a pair. I've always wondered how they weigh the weight of certain body parts. Like, oh, his arm was so and so kgs. Have you ever fallen asleep on your arm and then woke it up in the morning and tried to lift your arm? Oh, I'm a heavy piece of equipment. Oh, I was like, how does that relate? That's how. But then boobs can't lift themselves, so they would be heavy.

Yeah, yeah. And they're purely on one side of your body, like pulling you forward. That's true. This invention. It would be worse if they were on both sides of the body. It would be a bit unusual. This invention with like a hole for the boobs, how has this not like happened already?

Because it must be, what do you feel when you get a massage? Because there's a hole for the head. it must be, what do you feel when you get a massage? Because there's a hole for the head. That must be squishy. It's really, you can either go there and lie down and be like,

oh my God, I've just managed to get the perfect combination of like where they're supposed to be or you go there and the whole time you're like picking them up,

moving them along, spreading them apart, pushing them together, putting one up, putting one down. Like literally, it's so technical of how to get like the perfect,

like so it's comfortable. Do you go one up, one down? So it's different. Each bed's different. You know when you're sitting in the back seat of a car, you're kind of like,

well you sit forward a bit, I'll sit back a bit and we'll get a bit more room. Is that like boobs, one goes up, one goes... I don't know. I've never gone for a one up,

one down situation. When guys want on things, often they have to juggle it around So that it's either balanced Or comfortable bit here bit there We're all learning But on a massage table would the ideal situation Be a hole like the head hole Where the boobs would just hang free

Oh my god The beard from under the table would be like a dairy farmer Just hanging down Strap a couple of cups on it Imagine the dude from under the table would be like a dairy farmer. Just hanging down, strapping a couple of cups on it. Would you want them to hang down or would you want some sort of support? You'd want some support, wouldn't you? Just an indentation, wouldn't you? No, it's like your head. Your head hangs down.

Yeah, but your face has no weight to it. Substantial drag on the rest of the body. Well, if it's supported, then it might get too... If you had cushions on the holes, that might be nice. Like it's supported, then it might get too... If you had, like, cushions on the holes, that might be nice. Like a, oh, hello. Like a hammock. It's like having them free.

A hammock. Because the good thing about a hammock is that the people with the smaller ones wouldn't need the hammock, but then the bigger people with the bigger breasts would need the hammock. You're always looking for a business idea, Megan. Yeah.

Do the boob masseuse table. But also yoga. Call them boob se But also yoga. But then you're structurally No, but then you're structurally you're really You've infected the integrity of the table. Yeah, I'm not an engineer, but if you're going to cut a couple of big holes into a sturdy table, you're asking for a breakage.

No, it's just a little stick down. Add extra support frame. Yeah. Right. Some extra legs beside the boobs. No, no, no, no. Just like around the hole you put in some framing. Okay. Right. I mean legs beside the boobs. No, no, no. Just like around the hole. Okay. You put in some framing. Okay. Right.

I mean, there's all different sizes of big boobs as well, so you might need to be careful about that. Yeah, see, I don't think I've ever had an issue with lying down. I've never manoeuvred them. I don't think they do manoeuvre. You just stay in the one spot. That's good, my goose. Is it?

Yeah. Because you never like what you've got, do you? Maybe they're not dropping. It's good. Fletch, just lad chat. Have you ever laid down on a table and been like, oof, got to have a bit of an adjust and you feel really good? Because you're like, it's so big it's in the way.

It's happened to me once and I was so unpleased not to be able to tell everybody, but I lay down and I was like, that's not quite comfortable. Shit, sorry but this hurt God I felt great never happened since I can't explain it might have been like there might have been

a rolled up towel under there or something oh yeah right okay I mean that would go part way to explaining it but yeah sadly I'm not

in the market for the male version of this lilo it would be creepy if they released a guy version, eh? Yeah, no, it would be. Put your penis in a hole. Be weird.

Be a bit weird. I mean, they'd sell, but you wouldn't want to be the face of the product. No, no. But they'd sell. All right, well, that lilo. Is it coming? Is it on the market?

Yeah, on the market. In the UK. I'm sure you can buy it online. Maybe we need to get some for next year's Flochella. That would be a great idea. Order some for Flochella. Yes. What happens when you lie on your back, though?

There's a hole. You probably, your back would just go across it. Okay. No, turn it around. Oh, yeah. Flip it over. Oh, yeah, I never thought about that. Oh, yeah, I see that.

Yeah, no, you've got that right. Yeah, yeah, because they're the same old both sides. I came up with something great. Yes. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about something that's banned in Canada. Across the board. The entire nation of Canada.

Big nation too. Like. What is it? Second or third biggest land area nation? She's big. She's a big one, Canada. And today's fact of the day is that baby walkers are banned in Canada. Are those the ones that you.

It's like a harness. You sit in and there's like. There might be like a little tray in front of you. And there's like a harness. You sit in and there's like, there might be like a little tray in front of you and there's like a harness that you sit in and then you walk and the wheels help you walk. Oh, yep, yep. Oh, okay. We probably all had them growing up.

I know there's definitely photos of me cruising around in a baby walker. Okay. Well, that might explain my inability to do complex math as baby walkers have been like linked to development in babies, stunned development in babies, both physically and mentally. How crazy is that? Did you have a baby walker, Caitlin? She went down some stairs.

Oh, Fletch. Can you please repeat the question? Did you have a baby walker? You know where you sat in and you had wheels on and you'd walk around? With a little tray in front. And it would help you walk? Maybe. Yeah.

Nah. Oh. We were looking for. And it would help you walk. Maybe. Yeah. Nah. Oh. We were looking for one for my knees. Don't. They're no good. Probably. It's fairly. Oh, okay.

Oh, no. Yeah. Well, so the main reason that initially got them man is how many accidents there were. Right. In Canadian homes with babies getting in these baby walkers and parents turning their back for a moment and the kid ending up down the stairs. Oh, yeah.

Or touching things they shouldn't touch. Or outside. There was even a case of a kid getting outside. To beers. Beers are outside. And beers are outside. Very true. My dad's in Canada.

He just saw a beer. He was absolutely stoked. You're dancing. How close? Why isn't your dad and your mum doing a travel blog? Oh, my mum and dad. I could read you the text messages

but there's no photos mum won't even upload anything to Facebook she thinks it's showing off going on holiday and putting up photos of your holiday I'm like you guys

work really hard you're entitled to a holiday and I want to see photos and I'm sure everybody else would they because they love

seeing other people's holiday photos but they don't want to put any up of their own it's showing off that's so Kiwi-y so funny get them up Everybody asks, because they love seeing other people's holiday photos, but they don't want to put any up of their own. It's showing off. That's so Kiwi-y.

So funny. Get them up. Get them for the likes. But yeah, there are bears outside. So that's initially why they got banned. Yep. And possession of a baby walker can lead to fines up to $100,000 or six months in jail. Wow.

So you really can't get them. Yeah. So this baby scientist, there's a correct name for him. What do you call baby pediatricians? Baby scientists. He looked into the ban of them. Yeah.

And apart from the injuries, if it had advanced Canadian children, and apparently it was beneficial in the early stages of life. Because when you learn to walk by crawling and then pulling yourself up and then walking you learn all the motions of it and it connects a whole lot of the old electrons in the brain right just learning the upright motion and the leg after leg makes you go forward can actually make you walk later right and not make

those uh electron connections crazy yeah he said for for every 24 hours of total walker use, you were delaying your child's milestones of walking independently by three days. And when you're a parent, you freak out about these sorts of things. You're like, all the kids in the coffee group are walking, but yours isn't. You're like, what's wrong with him? Take him back. Take him back. Is there a warranty for these things? But then they'll start walking and you realize you're panicking what's wrong with him? Take him back, take him back. Is there a warranty for these things?

But then they'll start walking and you realise you're panicking over nothing. Right. But yeah, so today's fact of the day is that baby walkers are banned in Canada. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Well, it's big news. 660's only New Zealand show will be Westin Springs Stadium,

Feb the 23rd. And joining us in studio this morning from 660, Chris Mack, good morning. Good morning. Did you say God morning? Are we going religious on this show these days? No, we're targeting that audience. Plus, we missed a couple of episodes. I didn't realise where the show was going.

Well, your handmade towel's big at the moment, so blessed be the fruits. Under his eye. Under his eye. Well, God morning to all of you as well. Good morning, everybody. Hey, this is huge. So this is the only show that 660 are playing over summer.

This is it. You know, we just got a bit lazy. I was going to say, some of us said lazy. We said this. We were like, do you know what? If we were a band. I was going to say, some of us said lazy. We said this. We were like, do you know what? If we were a band, we'd do the same because stuff doing all those shows. I mean, the problem is I like getting out there and being in different cities and seeing all the people and meeting people.

I love that. But we've kind of exhausted our venue options. We kind of have to start going bigger. And so we thought, you know, because we did like 40,000, over 40,000 tickets on the tour last year. So we were like, well, let's just do one and let's make it historic because we're going to be the very first New Zealand act ever headline at Western Springs, which is really nuts.

That's amazing. And very scary to announce. I know because I remember when I lived in central Auckland, ACDC played there. I could hear it from my house, even though I was good like 2Ks. And there have only ever been those sorts of monumental rock bands that have been around forever. The Rolling Stones.

Yeah, they've played there. Yeah. Bob Marley, I think, maybe played there. I don't know. It's a really historic, awesome, massive venue. And so we thought, let's just do it. Let's go for it. Let's have some fun.

And let's make it our one show to make it really exciting. Going to be huge. Now, tickets go on sale not this Friday, but next Friday, the 6th of July. And it's not just going to be 660. You guys are headlining, but you've got support acts. We do, yeah. We're bringing on some of our friends. So the guys from Sons of Zion, who are awesome. We love

those guys a lot. Drax Project who are killing it right now. Huge. Have you got them locked in because they're doing like European tours with people? I'd be like, that's the thing. That's why we did it. We're like, let's get them now before they're way too famous to do this. Let's get them on paper. Yeah, exactly.

Then we've got Squidded as well and Elbaz. So, I mean, it's a pretty awesome line-up to hang out with. So, it's going to be a lot. It's almost like a festival of sorts. Yeah.

But it's, you know, it's our one big show. Will you be taking complaints personally from Western Springs residents who are upset with the noise? They just got rid

of Speedway and now you a-holes are coming to Speedway. Yeah, we were there the other day just having a look around, doing a bit of a photo shoot and stuff. And I was like, okay, those are the guys that are going to hate us

at the beginning of next year. That's great. So the show will be the 23rd of February. It's a Saturday. Right. Not a school night, which is great. Fantastic. Yeah, you've got a bit of recovery time on the Sunday.

No, on Sunday school, we are turning this into a religious program. That is a good point. That's a good point. We can come and do a couple of songs for your Sunday school. A straight to church. That would straight up go to a Fletchmore to Megan Sunday school. I think you would be about the only one.

I think we scold on all kinds of weird shit. And you better come first week because it'll get cancelled really quickly. Well, tickets on sale on the 6th of July at midday for 660's Western Springs Stadium show. But we've got a ticket blitz starting soon, nine o'clock until five. Every single hour, we're going to give away a double pass before

you can even buy them. Chris Mack from 660, thank you so much. Thank you for having me. Blessed be the fruit. It's time for Last Calls and we're going to start this morning with Holly.

Good morning, Holly. Hi, how's it going? Good. What's your story for Last Calls? So, this is pretty weird. When I was like Holly. Good morning, Holly. Hi, how's it going? Good. What's your story for last calls? So, this is pretty weird. When I was, like, probably 10 years old, me and my friend decided, we, like, lived out in the country.

Yeah. We decided we'd, like, go for a little bit of an adventure. Yeah. And, yeah, so we went, like, hiking up into, like, the bush and stuff. Yeah. And I really needed to go to the toilet. And I was like, oh, no, this is a bad, bad place. Yeah. So, I just got down to go to the toilet and I was like, oh no, this is a bad, bad place.

I just got down to go for a pee and I fell back but I fell into an ant hole. An ant hole? An ant hole. In New Zealand? Yes, an actual ant hole. I didn't think our ants could get their shit together enough to be any sort of threat other than a nuisance in the kitchen when you've left a sugary substance

on the bench. No, I didn't feel like it was like a legit actual hole but it must be on the bench? No, I didn't feel like, it wasn't like a legit actual hole, but like, it must be like an ant, like their home or something. I don't know. Anyways,

I like got completely covered in ants. I was just like at the top of this hill, like butt naked, trying to get all these ants off me. And I'm like yelling

to my friend, like, can you please help me get these ants? I'm like black, I'm covered in them, they're crawling all over me. Oh yuck.

Yeah, and she's all like, nah, no thanks, I'm all good. And she's like trying to like slap these ants. I'm like black. I'm covered in them. They're crawling all over me. Oh, yuck. Yeah, and she's all like, nah, no, like, no thanks. I'm all good. And she's trying to like slap these ants off me. It was awful. It was like a traumatic experience.

Could you have jumped in like a river or something? There was like no rivers any like close by. Also, your pants are down. I know. I just remember being, I probably like sat in my pants as well.

Did you find ants like later on your body? Is it like confetti or glitter? They were like living on me for a little while. We're like going to run home to like get these ants off. Oh, yuck. All right. Okay, wait there, Holly.

We'll vote in a sec. Hayley, what's your story for last calls? Hi. I was about 10 as well. Okay. I live in Christchurch and there's a park called Thompson Park and there used to be a fort behind it

and when I was little I got my finger caught in the flying fox This is why we don't have flying foxes now Well that's why the fort's not there anymore and so I'm on the way to hospital and ran out of petrol. And so, but we did manage to get pushed around the corner to the petrol station.

But yeah, that's my funny story. It's funny now. It came off, the finger. It was hanging off by a piece of skin and it's my wedding ring finger. So they sewed it back on. Like I can't bend it. You can't bend it? Was the fort sanctioned or was it like,

was the fort a sanctioned building or did kids just made a fort? No, it was like built by builders. Oh, right. It was crushed. Yeah, it's been caught in it. Oh, your finger. I thought you were talking about the fort.

I was very upset to hear a fort could be crushed. Your finger. I mean, those things grow back, I assume. You've survived. Alright, let's vote the Tribal Council now for our favourite story for last calls. Holly, you have taken it out.

Oh, thank you. Fletch, Vaughan and out. Oh, thank you.