ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - March 29 2018

Episode Date: April 6, 2018

It's time for The Long Weekend Group Toot, the Netflix shows to binge this long weekend and what have you walked in on? Having troubles with the podcast? We are working to get this problem fixed but in the meantime if you are listening on Chrome or Safari then try using an alternative browser eg. Firefox, IE You can also listen without an issue via iHeart or iTunes or Android podcast apps Podbean, Podcast Addict and BeyondPod.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. Thanks to Spark, get even more data with their prepaid rollover packs. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Yeah, Ash doing the news. Because Anya is away. She graduates today. Yay! I told her to get a flight down after the show.

What time's graduation? Millennials, any excuse for a holiday? Any excuse? I don't know. I said we'll get you a broadcasting box. You can do it from mum and dad's place or wherever you're staying, a hotel. Mum and dad live in Auckland. Oh, yeah, they do, yeah.

She's going to be well away from her Christchurch-based graduation. Oh, I don't know. Don't you have to get your robes and stuff like the day before? Yeah, you have to. See, Megan Fletch wouldn't know because he's new. Yeah, he's new and graduated. I'm going to be the only person on the show without a degree. When he presented his certificate back in the day,

they just asked him to wear some nice long pants. No, they literally just gave it to you. I think you just picked it up. If you want to laminate it, laminate is over there. I probably would for you. These things get wet. I don't think back in the day there were many people graduating at Taranaki Polytechnic. Taranaki Polytech.

Taranaki Polytech. Good on you for giving it a go, though. It's now Western Institute of Technology. They don't even have a media slash radio division. It's a sad, sad time. It's a sad time. It's a sad time. It's a dying media. It certainly isn't, Vaughn.

Still plenty of places willing to take your money if you want to get into radio. Not bitter at all. On today's show, the Long Weekend Group 2. Ladies and gentlemen, it is back just after 8 o'clock this morning. Get yourself jazzed. Get the horn a little warmed up. As always, I think warm-up essential. If you're driving anywhere now,

and maybe you're not going to be in the car at 8 o'clock, give the Long Weekend Group two a little bit of a go. No, maybe not in suburban areas. Oh, yeah, now people are still sleeping. We've been known to have a toot in the Mount Vic Tunnel, haven't we? We've been known every time we've been in the Mount Vic Tunnel, haven't we? We've been known every time. Every time. Every time.

If you've never heard the Long Weekend Group Toot, this is how it works. You call us when you're in traffic at 8 o'clock this morning and you give us the first bit of the Long Weekend Group Toot. And then somebody else listening will finish it off. Now, oh, that just sounds like the start of a game of Fortnite, like the battle bus is about to take off. Oh, my God. That's going to be in people's minds today.

That wasn't around last time. I'm going to have to ban you from playing Fortnite like the Warriors. Like the Warriors. Yeah. That's the secret of their success. Apparently, they're not playing Fortnite. Although last year. The strength and convincing coach is like, no bloody Fortnite.

Last year, there was no Fortnite. Well, we'll just add other distractions. Oh, okay. no Fortnite. Well, you've got to see other distractions. Oh, okay. Other distractions. Right. So, after 8 o'clock, if you've never played before, we love a first timer as well, but you've got to get that rhythm down. 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, 4.

That's it. Someone else, toot toot. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. All right, three stories. I've found three news headlines from websites, news organisations, stories from around the world. You've got to pick one headline only, then we delve into that story.

Headline one, the next hot trend in gender reveal videos. Have you seen this? Yes. Is it the alligator? Yep. What? And the watermelon. Yeah.

Yeah. So they injected something into the watermelon, right? Yeah. That coloured the inside of the watermelon. If it was a girl, I don't think you need to touch the watermelon. No, you don't touch the watermelon if it's a girl. You add something, changes the colour of the interior watermelon, and then you chuck it in a croc's mouth,

and the croc goes, and whatever colour he says. Oh, my God. Read it hillbilly as you please. Yep. Okay, well, that's story one done and dealt with. You'll need a crocodile for that gender reveal, though. Headline two, accidental worldwide model.

Headline two are three, restaurant books aren't competitors online and don't show up. So those two are three. Restaurant books out competitors online and don't show up. So those are the headlines. So a restaurant books out a competitor restaurant but then doesn't show up. Yeah. Cheeky. That's bad. Cheeky. That is an Australian cricket

player way of doing things. Yeah, isn't it? Cheating. That is fake internet booking is sandpaper in your pocket. Yep. Okay, so which story? So story two, accidental worldwide model. Okay, we'll do that one. Jack Stratton Smith. Stratton Smith, hyphenated.

It's an Australian guy. I'll quickly show you a photo, Megan. Born, good looking. Cute. Good looking guy. Yeah. Wow. Go on.

I'm going to put my charger back on. How much battery have you got? You don't need to put your charger right back in now at the detriment of the show flow. I don't want to ruin the show flow later when my laptop dies. You could have done the show flow. You could have not interrupted the show flow and plugged it in during the next song.

Well, you're interrupting the show flow by talking about the show flow. Well, I feel you've deviated the show river and affected the show flow. We might as well deal with the fact that someone's damned the show flow. Well, Jack Stratton-Smith, he was six months into his modelling career when a website offered him a surprisingly handsome sum, which he doesn't reveal. He doesn't say how much money. Right.

For quite a simple job. So imagine you're a model, you're just starting out, and they're like, we'd like you to come to a shoot and wear this plain white T-shirt. Okay. Yes. He's like, for a lot of money, he's like, okay, I'll do that. And then a couple more jobs, this time a crew neck,

maybe a raglan tee. Again. All the time are we talking a plain white? All the time, a plain white tee. And he was like, this is great. I'm a model now. I don't know. I feel like I would ask more questions.

This is great, I'm a model now. I'm a model now. I don't know. I feel like I would ask more questions. I'm a model now. I'm a model now. This is a fascinating read. GQ magazine have printed this story, I'm assuming in one of their latest issues. I'm reading it online. It's such an incredible story. So he lives in Melbourne, Australia,

and after the 2015 Paris terror attacks, that is when he started seeing himself popping up online in not just a plain white T-shirt, but on a website where you can print whatever you want on a T-shirt. Right. So there were people that were trying to profit from the Paris terror attacks, and they were making t-shirts like, if you're reading this, pray for Paris. Basically, anything you can imagine on a t-shirt.

And he's... Swear words, anything. You know those websites? There's a lot of them around. You can just go there. You can... Whatever you want on a t-shirt. And because it's plain, it just uses a template to put it onto the t-shirt so you'll see what it looks like.

Yes. And I'm guessing he's the model promoting anything anybody thinks. Yep. So t-shirts, even t-shirts promoting anti-feminism organizations in Australia. A heap of stuff. Racist stuff. Nazi stuff. Anything that could go on a t-shirt.

Eat shit and die. This is the problem with modern Nazis. The original Nazis would never have worn a plain t-shirt. They were snappy dresses. He said, yeah, true. They've got sloppy, these modern day Nazis. And they're horrific evil people, but they're sloppy. He said he's seen himself on more articles than I have fingers.

He's been involuntary. He's only got 10 fingers. He's been involuntary. He's only got 10 fingers. That's not that impressive. He's been the poster boy for every type of radical political ideology. In one image, he's a pro gun nut wearing a T-shirt that says, Why do I need one? Over an image of a rifle and just below it. Because F you, that's why.

Oh, no. And all kinds of stuff. It just goes on and on. It's a fascinating read. So what can he do about it? Because he kind of omitted it. He signed it away. It just goes on and on. It's a fascinating breed. And yeah. So what can he do about it? Because he kind of, I'm not guessing he's signing away.

He can't really do anything. Grow a beard. We'll start wearing glasses and say no, it's not me. I know. Why did they need a model really? You could have just had a t-shirt. The image of the t-shirt.

You didn't really need it to be on someone. Why do shopping websites have models? Because you see the t-shirt like, oh yeah, okay, that's going to look hot on me. Because hot guys wearing it. It's just a t-shirt. Now they've dragged him. Everybody knows what they Because you see the t-shirt like, oh yeah, okay, that's going to look hot on me. Because hot guys wearing it. But it's just a t-shirt. Everybody knows what they look like in a t-shirt is what you're saying. Yeah.

True, but sex sells, doesn't it? And he's good looking. He's good looking, yeah. Sex sells, you know, but like even if he's hot, if he was wearing a racist t-shirt, it's a bit of a deal breaker, isn't it? You know, but even racist people want to know that they can look hot in their T-shirt. Yeah, racism sells to racists. Racists beget racists.

Yeah. So if you're a model, if you're an aspiring model, so add that to the list. Never wear a blank T-shirt. And never get in a taxi and never sit on that leather couch. No, never. No. You're there for more than a calendar.

They know that. It's life advice, people. Take it on board. The top six is coming up. Yeah, the top six things to do in Chicago. Flying direct on Air New Zealand. This is the Air New Zealand's big announcement for the week. We're kind of tipped off to the fact it was going to be a Chicago flight-related story.

Well, because Obama was here. Yeah. And everyone was like, what? And he was a Chicago senator, wasn't he, before he was president? He was. He's been working with Air New Zealand, so, you know. Not a huge amount of detective work involved there. No.

It's true. But they're going to be going direct. Yeah, starting in November. That's insane. That's a long flight. Now, I've been. It's a very cool city. I'd love to go.

So if you want some tips, do you need, have you got your six? You write a little spreadsheet, you know. Write it up and put it at the end of the line. You know, are you taking the piss? Yeah. Yeah, I thought so. Make an Excel spreadsheet so people can ultra, but format the cells so people can just add in their own costs.

It's the last time I give you travel tips, Megan. The last time. How many spreadsheets have you got for different places? I've got Word documents on spreadsheets. I tell you, the worst country I've been to for this was Hawaii. When we said we were going to Hawaii, everybody's got a bloody spreadsheet of things to do and places to eat and

tips. Trust me, just as a test this weekend, say we think about going to Hawaii to whoever you run into, friends and family, guarantee they'll be like, I've got a word document of things you just have to do. It's the same with New York. I've got this great sandwich place. Okay. I'm sure I've got this great sandwich place. Okay.

I'm sure I'll stumble across a sandwich place. People are fanatical about their Hawaii. Mexico, that's another one. I know like four people that have got a Word document. That's included in my document. Mexico, Central and South America. All right. Fine.

If you don't... Well, if you are going to send it to me, you better email it to me because I know you'll have to put things in the post and the cost of post is going up. Seamless Segway. That was the Seamless Segway. Seamless.

Seamless Segway. I know there's broadcasting students graduating today. Yeah. Our 389 is one of them. Oh, stop. You never stop learning. Like, right then. You're about to get your degree,

but what you've just seen can't be taught. It undoes it, though, when you make such a fuss about your segway. Show flow. Show flow has stopped down. Keep the show flow on the go. New Zealand Post is increasing the cost of posting a letter from $1 to $1.20.

What blew my mind about this story was it cost a dollar to send a letter? Do you know? Last time I sent a letter, it was 70 cents, and I was outraged. Because I had old 45 cent stamps and I was like, how many of these do I need to send the letter? It was like, I had to put five on, right?

To send five stamps. That's bad, Matt. You've overshot that. God, you're terrible at that. You're worse than me. No, one, 45, oh yeah, no, three. Three would still be 15 cents too much under the new pricing. I definitely put five on it.

When? Oh, they saw you coming. Only like a couple of weeks ago. Well, that was when it was $1. You overshot it by like three stamps. Oh, whoopsies. How expensive is that? Big swig of mist from sellers on how much you should be paying for postage.

It sucks because it's only really grands that send stuff in the mail. I don't get anything in my mailbox. The odd thing. Courier packages and bills. Yeah. It's weird because we've opted out of paper bills like three times and we're still getting paper bills. What for?

Power, I think. I get my power emailed. Yeah, we get the email and the paper bill. Oh, have a word. Do you know what the worst thing is? Like having just got married, I did old school like in the mail invites. If they're $1.20 each and you've got like 100 people going,

you're going to spend, yeah, just on getting them the invites. That's insane. Actually, it'd probably be half that because most people would just be sending it to you. You don't need to send your mum and your dad separate invites. I think I spent about $70 just to post the invites. I was like, what has happened here?

And you can't buy a sexy postage paid envelope. You can't buy a sexy sort of matte black postage paid envelope. They're always those huckery white things with either the plastic window in the front, which I can never fold a letter to get to line up that, by the way. It's an art. It's an art. It's a lost art because I'll never ever put in the effort to do it now

because it happens so rarely. Or, you know, huge, long, skinny, white ones. You want your wedding invitations to go on something nice, don't you? Yeah. And then you've got to put a stamp on. Yeah. Yeah. So it's going up to $1.20, which is sad news for nearly nobody

because that's why it's going up to $1.20 because nobody's using the post for the post anymore. You may as well just get a courier envelope. It's getting to that stage. It is. It's only a couple of dollars away. Everybody's courier-izing things now. Things that you would have traditionally popped in the post, you just courier it now, don't you?

Yeah, it's easier. Hmm. Hmm. R.I.P. R.I.P. Yeah, I guess that's what we're saying. Hmm. R.I.P.

Post it. Post it for the nans. And they just bought all those neat new electric vehicles. If they look at how I've flown some of those, I would 100% buy one. Even if I just took the stickers off. Because, you know, you see an old courier van and they've taken the stickers off, but it's still a red and yellow and it's got a weird line. You're like, why does it stop being red there?

Oh, it's an old courier van. They've just taken the stickers off. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Welcome to today's Top 6. The Top 6 things you can do in Chicago when you go there via Air New Zealand. Direct. 17

hours. That's a lot. Starting in November. Yeah. It's a long, it's like that Doha one that we did, Megan, that time. Yeah, that's 17. It's a long time. But then you're right there because normally you'd have to go into LA and then get like a five hour flight. Two, but you're straight in there.

Straight in. Straight in there. And really close to New York, Canada, Montreal. Lakes. Yeah, lakes. Oh, huge lake. Big lake. Real big lake.

That's like Lake Superior. I don't know. I've seen on TV shows, the lake looks so big it. That's a little superior. I don't know. I've seen on TV shows, the lake looks so big, it looks like it's an ocean. Yeah, I've watched. It looks like a sea. I went there a couple of years ago. It's an incredible city. I know you're probably going to say bad things, Ward.

No, not all bad things. Because it's got reputations. It does, and we'll deal with that soon. But you stand on the beach, and it looks like you're standing at the ocean. The lake is that huge, you just can't see. Really? Yeah, it's insane. So today's top six, the top six things to looks like you're standing at the ocean. The lake is that huge, you just can't see. Really? Yeah, it's insane. So today's top six, the top six things to do when you get there,

including look at that giant lake that looks like it's an ocean. Number six on the list is visit all the famous people hotspots. The following famous people would call Chicago their home city. Robin Williams. Okay. He called it, well, his home city. Harrison Ford, our very own Han Solo. Yeah.

And of course, I mean, there's a long list of people, R. Kelly included. I don't know if they're claiming him. They're not claiming him? Not after the plastic sheet. Oh, not the sheet thing. Everything. But who could forget Chicago's most famous resident? Michael Jordan?

Soldier Boy. Soldier Boy, tell him. Right. Do it to Superman at home or something. That's inappropriate now, isn't it? Boy, tell him. Right. Do it to Superman that hoe or something. That's inappropriate now, isn't it? Yeah,

you can't Superman that anymore. Don't be Superman that hoe without her consent and don't call her a hoe. That's disrespectful. Thank you. Number five on the list.

Barack Obama. Did you say Barack Obama? No. Isn't Kanye from Chicago? Chi-town? Is he? Oh yeah, we're the Windy City.

Yes, Kanye. Sure, Chicago. Yeah. Sure. Okay. He gets enough attention. Number five on the list

of the top six things to do in Chicago because you can float there direct. Go see some sports. Huge sports town. Cubs. The Bulls,

the Bears, the Cubs, the Kurgers, the Stags, the Lions. One thing I learned in researching this, a lot of their sports teams

are named after dangerous animals. Yeah. Perhaps the most interesting, though, is the Chicago Whales, because they're kind of like a landlocked. They do have a large lake, but... No whales.

I don't think there's any whales in there. No. Prove me wrong. Sure. I would happily be proved wrong. Number four on the list of the top six things to do in Chicago. See things you've seen in the movies. Heaps of movies were filmed in Chicago.

Yeah. Huge for filming there. I'm guessing because it's cheap and they can kind of break stuff and it's okay. Right. Space Jam. Yep. Transformers movies, Batman movies,

Spider-Man 2, and ironically, Sleepless in Seattle was filmed in Chicago. No. Makes no sense. We lied to. They lie. The TV shows lie all the time. Like CSIs, all filmed in LA. Yeah. Chicago no sense. We lied to. They lie. TV shows lie all the time.

Like CSIs. All filmed in LA. Yeah, Chicago hype. Not even filmed in Chicago. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. Number three on the list of the top six things to do in Chicago, because you can fly there direct now,

eat one of those weird Chicago-style pizzas. That's way more like a pie, but also semi-quiche-like. A deep dish. It's just cheese. It's very cheesy. And it, but also semi-quiche-like. A deep dish. It's just cheese. It's very cheesy, and it's a big thing over there. See, I prefer a New York pizza than a deep dish. Yeah, they don't like that. Oh, yeah.

You've got to eat it with a knife and fork. You can't pick it up with your hands. That's a pie. Yeah, it's way more of a pizza pie. Hey, that's a good pizza. Number two on the list of the top six things to do in Chicago, get murdered. I knew you were going to say this. 2016 was the worst year for homicides in nearly two decades for Chicago.

762 murders, 3,550 shooting incidences, and 4,331 shooting victims, which means some of those gunshots actually went through two people. Oh, no. Or maybe three. On average, 12 people a day are shot in Chicago and had experienced more murders than New York and Los Angeles combined in 2016. The number of homicides in Chicago since 2001 also eclipsed the US war dead in Iraq and Afghanistan in late 2016. Looking back at it, I probably should have got an Uber that time

or walked back from that party when I was there. Was there any, did you see some? No. You didn't feel like you were going to die at any point? No, I didn't feel unsafe at all. I thought it was a great city. I think it's certain areas. Yeah.

It's probably not where you'd go as a tourist. A bit more stabby than others. Yeah. Or shooty. Shooty. Shooty, yeah. They prefer a shooty than a stabby. And the number one thing to do in Chicago, you can fly there direct on Air New Zealand.

I mean, that last point definitely would have sold it to you, is breathe the same air that Oprah breathed from the years 1986 to 2011. Is that what that was filmed? The Oprah Winfrey show was filmed in Chicago for those years. And I think she's got a big apartment there on the waterfront too. Oh, actually. Yeah. Harpo Studios, the near west side home of her show for many years,

was demolished last year to make room for a McDonald's corporate headquarters. And Winfrey has sold off all of the Chicago area properties, including a condo in the Water Tower place in 2015. Yeah, I've seen that because everyone was like, that's where Oprah lives. So basically she stayed there until she got way too rich and she saw living in Chicago as a real risk. Probably her number two on this list and moved to LA. But she did breathe that air so you on this list and moved to LA.

But she did breathe that air, so you could go there and breathe it too. That's today's top six. FEM. Just before, we were talking about sending letters, and who still sends letters. Caitlin says she still sends letters to her grandma. And I said that's the problem. My nana that I used to write letters to and she used to write letters to me,

she's passed away now, and I guess that's why postage is going up because it's a, you know, it's a bygone era. God, they do that. See, that's the annoying thing about old people.

They endear themselves to you. They nest into your heart and then they go and die on you. Very inconsiderate. Bake sweet baking. I know.

Make you take one for each hand when you leave and then you die. So you've got to take two treats and then they go and die on you.

So it got me thinking that I actually, my mum's dad, he's passed away now, but he lives near, he lives near Hobbiton. And I went to Hobbiton last weekend. I forgot to tell you guys, I've talked nonstop about my Waikato trip. It's a great region. Go there if you've got anything planned this Easter weekend, get to the Waikato. Great spot. Race to some great people like the current Prime Minister and me.

Two ends of the scale there. Yeah. And we were doing the tour, and the lady that was taking us on the tour, you know I believe her name was, she said, interesting story about this hedge. This hedge was sourced from a local farm. This hedge wasn't here. They wanted to make a border to the shire here in Hobbiton. Yeah.

This hedge wasn't here, but they wanted a hedge that was established. They wanted to make a border to the shire here in Hobbiton. Yeah. This hedge wasn't here, but they wanted a hedge that was established. They didn't want it. They didn't have time to grow. They wanted it. You know how hedges go, but gnarled and have holes in them when they're well aged.

So they bought it off a local farmer. And I was like, that was my granddad. Because he told me the story once. He's like, I remember him

distinctly saying to me in like 99, 2000, have you heard of this Lord of the Ring? Right. And I was like, yeah, the books and stuff. And he's like, they're making the movie down there, this Lord of the Ring.

Down the road. Down the road, over there. And he pointed. And he's like, it's going to be happening down there. They're filming some shenanigans. And they're like, oh, there's some people involved? Because it always blows old mates' minds how many people are involved in filming. He's like, this joker comes up here and asks me if he can have our boundary hedge.

What the hell did he want a bloody hedge for? That old, like, we were going to rip it out, but we just couldn't find the time. He's like, so I said, yeah, you can take it as long as you put a fence in. And they were like, oh, okay. And now I learn it's for a movie. I should have asked for some money.

And I distinctly remember him saying about this hedge, this boundary hedge. And he have. And I distinctly remember him saying about this hedge, this boundary hedge. Yeah. And he described the guy that came and got him and it fit Peter Jackson's description. And after this trip, Peter Jackson is such a perfectionist. Yeah.

Hearing about Hobbiton that it wouldn't have surprised me if he was like, I'm going to go find the hedge I want. Right, because he wanted it perfect. Yeah. How big was this hedge? Like a lot. A lot of hedge. Did they take it in sections?

Yeah, they brought in diggers and dug it out because they obviously couldn't just haul it out because the roots would ruin and it would die and they wanted it to live. So they had to take it out. They must have got someone who knew what they were doing to cut a certain amount of ground and transport it, put it all in the back of trucks and take the hedge.

So your granddad's hedge is in Hobbiton? Also, your granddad's fence was built by Peter Jackson. Well, I don't know if Peter Jackson was on the end of trucks and take the hedge. So your grandad's hedge is in Hobbiton. Also, your grandad's fence was built by Peter Jackson. Well, I don't know if Peter Jackson was on the end of a hammer. He was responsible for the fence. For the fence being built.

Wow. He should put a little block up and then pay tourists. So it would have been in the movie too. But he always told me this but my grandad was like me like he talked a lot of shit.

So there was always in the back of my mind I'm like, it's a good yarn but I don't know if I believe it. But then when she said it it confirmed it. a lot of shit. So there was always in the back of my mind, I'm like, it's a good yarn. It's a good yarn, but I don't know if I believe it. But then when she said it,

it confirmed it. So if you're in Hobbiton, and I said to her, I told her the story, and she's like, I'll add that to my tour notes. Oh, God. Okay, so it better be true.

Did you give her his name? Your local farmer. I just said Gangie. Gangie. That's what we called her. Hopper, Gangie, one of them. Some guy's granddad.

So if you ever do the Hobbiton tour, and you see the hedge, and they're like, oh, this hedge was bought here by a local farmer, I don't want to brag, which you have just spent a couple of months doing. Well, technically it's your granddad's claim to fame. It's got nothing to do with you.

He passed it on to me in his will, Megan. Oh, okay. His claim to fame. Damn. I saw this last night on Reddit. Read a story. It just simply had the headline, I stood on a guy's hand in a line at Disneyland,

and then this happened. This is creepy. So this is weird. He stood on, so the story goes, they were lining up for a ride at Disneyland. Yeah. And this guy was on the ground, sitting on the ground waiting in the queue. Okay. The person

who stood on his hand didn't see him and must have stepped backwards and stepped on his hand. Yeah. I was like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. Like, heck, I stood on your hand. Yeah, he was on the ground, just sick of waiting. You know, sometimes, my kids do it, they'll always be like, I'm just going to sit down. Some of those lines at Disneyland go for

a long, you're in line for an hour for like, some of them. So this is like the end of last year. This guy's like, I'm just going to sit down. Some of those lines at Disneyland go for... A long... You're in line for an hour for some of them. So this is the end of last year. This guy's like, oh, that's fine. You on Instagram? What? You on Instagram? Are you on Instagram? The guy's like, yep.

He's like, what's your username? I'll follow you. You follow me. Just for a bit of conversation. Weird. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if it was the first thing that came up in their post hand standing conversation.

But either way, whatever happened, he got his Instagram. Yeah. Okay. And then messages him, yo, to which the guy who stood on the hand

says, sup. The guy whose hand was stood on then says, yo, you want to make a hundred bucks? Can you step on my hands with your shoes? What?

That's so creepy. You know I can. I've already done it once. So it's at this stage that a little bit of light thinking would indicate that he's maybe sitting on the ground in the queues because he likes to have his hands stood on. So he's not even going to Disneyland because he likes rides. Maybe for the teacups and a picture with Goofy,

but there's this erotic side effect happening. He gets off on people hurting him. He wants to pay this guy $100 to stand on his head. And the guy says, sure, I want to make $100. I'm imagining he replied before the, can you step on my hands for sure? He's like, really? How long can you step for?

Can you send me a photo of the bottom of your shoes? applied before the can you step on my hands for sure. He's like, really? How long can you step for? Can you send me a photo of the bottom of your shoes? To which the stander says, I guess, what's this all about? I want to see how it's like. Can you send me a photo now? So he, rather than taking a photo of his own shoes, Googles Nike Roshies and sends him a photo. So this is the shoe I was wearing when I stood on your hand.

He's like, no, no, the bottom of your shoes. The ones you have on right now. He says, why do you want to see those? He says, I want to see how it looks. Lol. It'll only take you a second. He said, what's in it for you? Like $100 for me to step on your hand. And he said, I want to see how it is. And the guy says, well, I want to see the

$100. So he sends him a photo of a $100 bill. Is this still going on while they're both at Disneyland? I don't know. I guess because like the conversation started at 1.42 in the afternoon and there's no other sort of timestamps. So it must have been quite back and forward. Okay. And he sends him a photo of the $100 bill and he says, here's the $100 bill. Can you send me a photo of the bottom of your shoes? So by the looks of it, he gets a mate or, you know, he reaches out and takes a selfie of the bottom of his shoes and the guy's like, cool.

So how long can you step on them for? What was that Netflix show where the cop was all like into being heard and stuff? The Sinner. The Sinner. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he was just like, you remember that? That was weird when that happened, eh?

There's a little side story going on there. Bill Paxton's character was into being, he was just like embarrassed, humiliated sort of thing. Yeah, humiliated, yeah. But then that's one thing, but this is a very specific fetish. So he says, how long can you step on them for? To the guy who's going to stand on his hands.

And he says, well, how long do you want me to for $100? And the guy says, what about six minutes? Six? Now, would you do that for six minutes for $100? Have you? Now, see, that's the thing. I don't know a lot about sexual fetishes, but I know that you have to pay top dollar for them.

I'm thinking $25 a minute, absolute minimum, so he'd get five minutes tops out of me, maybe two and a half. Right, okay. You'd have a timer going. I'm feeling particularly classy that day. That's a weird one, isn't it? And so the guy, obviously interested in where the heck this is going, says, okay, that's cool.

What's the plan then? And he said, well, I don't feel well, so I've just left the park. Obviously referring to Disneyland. Are you able to meet me somewhere before I leave to go back home? Oh, this sounds like murder. This sounds like a murdering trowel. And so the guy doesn't reply. And he said, did you notice

that you stepped on my hand very well in the line? And he's like, no, I don't reply. And he said, did you notice that you stepped on my hand very well in the line? No. And he's like, no, I don't know. This is so creepy. I know. And he said, can you meet me in East Orlando on Curryford and Dean? That's our guess of the streets.

Right. So do you know you stepped on my hand so well when we were in the line? Obviously meaning he's got some sort of technique. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He believes that this guy's got a technique. So not a stomp. You'd want to just lightly step on him maybe. I don't know.

And he said, I'm about to head back to, and then blanks out the address. And he says, is this a hotel or a house? Like, where am I going? And he said, it's a house. And then asks again, did you notice you stepped on my hand very well in the line? And he said, yeah, I did.

Did you enjoy that feeling? And he's like, yes. I just liked the feeling. When can you that feeling? And he's like, yes. I just like the feeling. When can you do it? It's for $100. And then obviously the conversation stops. Yeah, right. Because this guy's like, okay, I've tested the waters enough.

It's creepy. I wanted to know what was happening. I've got enough to screenshot and put on Reddit now. That's enough. An hour and a half later, he's like, bro, are you going to step on me or what? I'm being for real. I'll give you a hundred

dollars to step down on my hands with your sneakers doesn't reply another hour and a half goes by and he sends him three question marks and that's the end of the conversation imagine standing on someone's hand in a line yeah and then it leads to that weird fetishy stuff we've all done way worse jobs for way less money, though. Oh, we have. Yeah. I mean, you worked at Shell Morrinsville, didn't you? I did. Back in the day.

Well, roughly after tax, probably $4 an hour. So, I mean, you know, standing on someone's hand. I do. I know there's no free pies. 17-year-old me would have done that. Well, you can buy your own pies for $100. 17-year-old Paul would have most definitely made $100 that day. And he was a tubby little man, too. Ohold boy would have most definitely made a hundred that day.

And he was a tubby little man too. Oh, there would have been some weight behind those. Would have been some knuckle crackers. Ed Sheeran's in New Zealand. Did you know that? I've heard a couple of people might have seen him. Just before he went to Dunedin, there was rumours that he went to Masterton because there was like a little private plane that landed in Masterton. Of course, Peter Jackson's got a mansion not far from, just out of Masterton.

But a jet or a plane? I don't know. It looks like a little, it's not a private jet, but it's a private little plane. Right. And of course, Ed had a day off and his good mate's with Peter Jackson. So did he go to Masterton? He might have done. But now he has moved on to Dunedin. He is there now

and yesterday on his story lots of New Zealand content from Ed Sheeran on his story. Well he loves it here doesn't he? Yeah and he got a wee surprise when he went to Dunedin airport. They changed the name of the airport.

Oh my god. So awesome. Dun Eden. Dun Eden. So they've painted the Ed blue, highlighted the Ed in Dun Eden. He's pretty stoked with it. Pretty cute. That was pretty cute. And then, so, you know that big mural that was, there was a bit of an uproar

like, it cost $8,000 and people were like, taxpayer money, ratepayer money. Well, he's seen it. He's got, he took a selfie with it, and hashtag mural selfie. What time did he check it out? Because it looks like it happened, like, late last

night, or? I think it, well, probably would have been late. You'd probably want to go at a low traffic time. Yeah, when no one's there. They'll get stormed. Yeah. So Dunedin has an actual plan they've called Paint the Town Ed. So in the Octagon, they've got grass, like fake grass. They've made like a turf and they're having like a little concert in there. I think it's happening tonight.

They're hoping that Ed will go and like see it. Starts in the afternoon. But also, lots of restaurants have Ed Sheeran themed meal options. And they've got decorations in the windows. I love that they're getting their all into it. How do you theme a meal around Ed Sheeran? Ginger things. What's in?

Like ginger itself. Or like name it something. Yeah, just name it after his songs. Oh, you could do that. Yep. Oh, you could call it like a Sheeran platter. Yep, a Sheeran platter. Yeah, just name it after his songs. Oh, you could do that. Yep. Oh, you could call it like a Sharon platter. Yep, a Sharon platter. Yeah, exactly.

Although I don't like Sharon my platters. I like to keep my platter all to myself. I know. But they said it will bring like the concerts because so many people were going even from Christchurch. Well, one third of the tickets were to Christchurch addresses. Yeah, and just a reminder as well, if you're driving down today or for any of the shows over the Easter break,

you're going to need to leave early because there's going to be a lot of cars on the road. Yeah, so for those people who are complaining about spending $8,000 on that mural, they said it could bring up to $34 million into the area. If there's one thing I know about people who bitch and whinge about these sorts of things, Megan, they don't

tend to think about anything further than the dollar amount they just saw written down somewhere. Yeah. That's what they like to do, just have a good whinge. Big weekend for Dunedin. FEM. We've kind of started this weird little tradition before long weekends of recommending things to binge watch.

Why not? If you find yourself parked in front of a computer or a TV and, you know, that Wi-Fi is just aching to be used. Yeah. What you can watch on Netflix. Yeah. Some recommendations to watch on Netflix. I just want to put a mention out there for Jessica Jones Season 2.

Really enjoyed Jessica Jones Season 2. You always tell me I should watch that. The Marvel. There's a lot to catch up on. There's a lot to catch up on now if you've not started the Marvel Netflix. Collabs. Right. Another thing I want to recommend, Annihilation, which is a sci-fi.

It's just a one-off. It's a movie, but put it in your, you watched it. It's, go into it open-minded. It's really weird. It's really weird. It's weird sci-fi. Yeah. Super weird.

Super weird. So don't be expecting a lot of stuff to make sense. I'm going to name the number one show that we recommend. Of all this list? Of all this list at the very end. Oh, so it's not now. You're going to blow it out of the water. Not now.

You know what I'm doing. Let me do that one. I might not even put it on the list. Oh, is he going to do his one? You do yours now then. No, I'm saving it until the last. It's not number one for all of us. It's number one.

It's not. It's the number one show to binge this long weekend. Okay. So you're going to do it at the end? At the end. Okay, the next show we're watching on Netflix, Nailed It, is a baking show. Boy, that's my, that's the number one on the list. No, it's not number one.

Haven't you listened to Radio People Do List? You saved the list. No, I'm sabotaging your list. We didn't all agree. Because I don't agree that this show is as great as it. You haven't seen it. You haven't seen it. I don't think I need to.

We'll put it on the list. Okay, nailed it. Nailed it is a baking show and they are rubbish and it's like those... Pinterest fails. It's like the Pinterest fails. And they set them up for failure.

They asked them to ice a hot cake. Ice a hot cake. No, they've got this $10,000 cooling fridge that cools cakes in like a second. Someone would pay $10,000 for a fridge for what the benchtop would do given enough time. Yeah, exactly. But they use this fridge, but it's incredible. Yeah, and they are putting people in the deep end, but it is hilarious.

You love it. I've been, everyone I've told. A friend of mine tried to watch it and he said he got 15 minutes in and he was like, this is ridiculous. Yeah, but your friend's an idiot. Honestly, I've had so many people recommend it. Yeah but your friend's an idiot. Honestly I've had so many people recommend it. No it is.

It's everyone's talking about it at the moment. Nailed it. Number one show to watch this weekend on our list. Which is now out of order.

A show that I have only seen the first episode of there's six episodes but the trailer's an amazing sell and I think it will probably be this year's

Making a Murderer Right. is a show called Wild Wild Country, about what was labelled a cult, but you know what, after episode one, they don't come across too cultish, but I've got a feeling they're on the road.

They're on a one-way road to being a cult. That's set up in America in the 80s, after originating in India. The Shwama? Bagram Shw India. Yeah. The Shwama. Right. Bagram Shwama. Right.

He's a Shwama. Like a religious man. Yeah, they moved to America because they believe the constitution will protect their right to religious freedoms but tell you what,

it doesn't look like it's gonna. It's gonna go down. You show me the trailer for this. It looks really good. Episode one, it already had like

two twists in it. Right. Lots of twists. And lots of twists coming. Another show I want to recommend because I'm trying to fit in

something for everybody on this list is a Western called Godless. I can't remember if I recommended this last time. It looks real violent. She's pretty full on.

Oh yeah, I watch that. It's a good show. It's a really good show. Jeff Daniels and the main guy, they're great acting throughout. Great acting throughout. And it's got Nanny

McPhee in it. Oh, the kid of Nanny McPhee. Yeah.'s got Nanny McPhee in it. Oh, the kid of Nanny McPhee. Yeah. Not actual Nanny McPhee. Not actual Nanny McPhee. The boy that's off Love Actually as well. Oh, he's a babe.

Yeah. He's good in this too. Santa Clarita Diet Season 2 is out. I know you guys love that show. I never finished Season 1 but I do intend to. I never finished Season 1.

You love that show, Megan. I'm like halfway through Season 2. It's so good. Drew Barrymore, Tim Olyphant. It's really funny. She eats people, eh? But only bad people? Is that the...

She's undead, yeah. And is falling apart a little bit. And she's got morals, but she also needs to eat people. So you can see her predicament. You can see it. It's all about trying to find a balance and it's that situation

that leads to hilarity. She's going after eating Nazis at the moment because she says they're tasty and, you know, like... Nazis. Yeah, the world needs less Nazis. That's a fact. Queer Eye, if you haven't watched Queer Eye, the reboot of Queer Eye,

give yourself some tissues and sit down and watch that. So good. I tried half an episode of the first one. I was like, I'm out. This is rubbish. No, you'd rather I just nailed it. Yeah, every time. Every time. That's better of the first one. I was like, I'm out. This is rubbish. No, you'd rather I just nailed it. Yeah, every time.

Every time. That's better than the first one. Oh, yeah, I totally agree. Yeah. Totally agree. If you're a parent and you need to sit your kids down in front of the TV and then disappear somewhere for like an hour, two hours, three hours. Black Mirror.

Is that what you were going to say? You want to put it on kids mode. Trolls. The sing-along animated movie, which was great, now has an animated series. That's babysat my kids like three times lately, so that's worth a recommendation. Take Your Pills is a doco all about drugs and sports.

I've heard this is really good. Everybody, yeah, people that I know that have watched it have said it's a great thing. And another documentary to watch, The Defiant Ones, it's a story of Dr. Dre and the founding of Interscope Records and how everybody in the 90s was pretty much tied in together, all the different musicians and stuff, and how he launched Beats by Dre and then sold it for $3 billion.

I know to Apple that's insane. That would be a good watch as well. Yeah, that's a really good watch. Lots to binge over the weekend. Yeah, me. Went to the movies last night. I went to see Blockers before you asked. Okay.

Pretty funny. What did you guys see? Oh, damn it. You already answered. Pretty funny. You pre-answered my question. Oh, yeah. Why weren't you listening to me?

Blockers. No, I was. She said before you asked, but then I asked. I blocked you. Is that what the movie's about? Blocking people on Snapchat. It sends you endless, long, boring stories. Needed to go wheeze afterwards.

Right. Went to the movie toilets. What? No, I was going to say this is good. Not during, because I always need to go during. You are terrible. I'm shocking. Vaughn's like, can you just move your knees?

I've got to go to the toilet. I'm like, go before. And he even does go before. I did go before, two times during, one again afterwards. Nana bladder. You wee a lot. Well, I just, the minute I feel like I need to wee, well, I think I've got type 2 diabetes all the time.

If I get thirsty, but then I'm thirsty and then I wee lots. Or an STI or a urinary tract infection. There's absolutely no concern of that. He'll wee and then an hour later need to wee again. I know. That's not normal wee. Well, you're drinking like how many of those liters? I do drink a lot of water.

Right. Okay. So anyway, needed to wee after the movies. And there was a huge queue, as you'd imagine, because it's the women's toilets. There was one stall that was ajar. So it wasn't just it said vacant and the door was closed. It was like a little bit ajar. So it wasn't just it said vacant and the door was closed. It was like a

little bit ajar. And did it say vacant or engaged? It was stuck halfway. So it had and, and, and. But then if it's ajar, it doesn't matter because sometimes if you slam the door behind you, that thing will move a little bit. Yeah, and then it'll bounce back. If the door's ajar at all, the vacant or engaged sign

no longer comes into play. Yeah, and I was next bounced back. If the door's ajar at all, the vacant or engaged sign no longer comes into play. Yeah, and I was next in line. So I was like, well, it's my responsibility to check this toilet because I'm next in line. Everyone's waiting. So I gave it a push, not expecting anyone to be in there. Gave it a pretty hard push and there was a middle-aged woman perched on the toilet. A baby boomer mid-wee. I hope it was just mid-wee.

Okay. She was very upset and yelled at me and slammed the door shut. But my question is... You can't be upset. She didn't lock the door. Yeah, I'm sorry, Catherine. Or Susan. Definitely Susan.

But if you didn't, Helen, if you didn't lock the door, people are going to walk in. Yeah. Especially when there's a queue and there's noise. If the door was broken, put your foot on it. Yeah. Or get a spotter. You always have a friend at the door saying,

how are my friends in there? How does that work for females if you've got your legs up? You've still got your bum on the seat. You spray it everywhere. Yeah, but you're just going to spray, aren't you? Or if it's real close, you can sit on it and lean forward. That's probably a better technique. Yeah.

Helen doesn't want that on her dress pants though, does she? No, no, no. Slacks. Helen was running a real risk there and I like opened the door. So what did she say to you? What were her words? She was like, I'm in here. I was like, okay, Helen. Shut the door. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And then

locked the door. But so when you went in, did you go in into that one? Did the door work? The lock work? Into the one I went into? Yeah. Oh, but you didn't go into her one. No, I didn't. Because someone else would have been, okay, right.

She was still weighing. This was like on a plane once. I went to the bathroom, more for just a little bit of leg room, but I just thought while I'm here, I'll try to poo. Okay. And I had my pants right down and I stretched my legs right out. Yep. And an old man opened the door.

Just saw it all. Right. And he must have been like, well, that's an unusual position that they're young mans in. Because I was kind of stretched. I was like a hard plank. Were you trying to stop the door? No, no, no.

I was stretching my legs because I'd been in a sort of economy cramped seat a little bit. If you stretch your legs out, though, your bottom clenches a little bit, doesn't it? It's not ideal. Oh, no. I'd come to the conclusion that I wasn't probably going to poo, but I was just enjoying the more leg room. But you were sitting on the seat like that. Like with your bum on the seat. That's gross.

Yeah. Okay. Maybe not as reclined as this, but I was certainly on the seat like that. Like with your bum on the seat. That's gross. Yeah. Okay. Maybe not as reclined as this, but I was certainly stretched out. And, you know, he caught a whole thing. Also, Susan had her. But I couldn't be angry at him because I was the one that forgot to lock the door. Susan had her pants like right down at ankles. Do you do that?

I do. If I'm sitting down, I take them right down to the ankles. Unless there's a wet floor, then I hover them just below the knee. You've got to hover. You've got to hover them. She went right down. Not just at knees. Right.

What a fast and loose attitude to public toilets. Yuck. Pants right down, door not locked. So, upon my embarrassing night last night, I want to know what you've walked in on when the door should have been locked. Okay. Are we talking just public toilets? No.

No, we're talking anywhere where a door wasn't locked. Any door, like at home, at the flat? Any. Any door. Like what have you walked in on? When the door wasn't locked. Didn't you walk in on your parents making sweet, sweet love? We don't talk about that.

How old were you when that happened? I don't know. I don't even know if they know about that. What? So you just walked in and they were just like in it, doing it? Oh, you don't linger. You turn around and leave and pretend nothing ever happened. And they were in the moment. They're very

sort of thoughtful love makers. Passionate love makers. Like, when Megan's parents are making love, there's only two people in the world that are so engaged in each other, eye contact. Because I walked in on them too and they did not stop. Everyone was like, excuse me?

Excuse me? Whereabouts is the light that I can turn eye contact because I walked in on them too and they did not stop. Everyone was like, excuse me, excuse me, whereabouts is the light that I can turn on to the outside porch? Excuse me, is it behind the curtains? While I'm in here, I'm doing the dishes. Where do the bowls go? Because I was a visitor. The sellers, passionate lovers. Excuse me, stop. Oh, my God. Wait, excuse me! Stop!

Oh my God. Or just slow down at the very least. Where do the bowls go? Where's the porch light switch? We're talking about when you've walked in on someone when the door should have been locked. I walked in on Helen, a baby boomer. We've given her a name.

That's not her actual name. And a backstory. We don't know her name. She didn't lock the toilet door for whatever reason, I don't know. Man, we're getting some great stories in, aren't we? Some great stories. Very good.

I walked in on, as a child, my mother and father in the throes of passion. Okay. They didn't know I was home. I was like, oh, they didn't see me. This is much like your story, Megan. Yeah, don't bring it up.

So like a good big brother, I went out and said to my little brother, hey, mum and dad want you. They just didn't know. Oh, no. And he went charging in. No. You're like, if I have to see it, he has to see it. Yep.

That is brilliant. That is so funny. Bella, what did you walk in on when the door should have been locked? I was about 22 and I walked in on my parents, who normally sleep in separate rooms. Yeah. And I'd kind of gone and mum had gone and done a morning visit. A morning visit.

Was this a weekend? No, weekday. What night? Weekday? Weekday. Weekday. Just before work. They had said that before work. They had separate bedrooms, but they still had enough passion between them to have a little morning nookie before work.

Yeah, there was a guy on the phone who wanted to talk to Dad. I was like, ah, fine. And I said, well, open the door, and Mum's on top. Okay, yeah. Mum? Go, Mum. Okay, yeah. Mum? Go mum, by the way. That could be the tip, Vaughn. Before work is when you should try.

Yep, 3am. Hey. Yeah, good luck. Wake up. Brent, what did you walk in on when the door should have been locked? I walked in on my boss playing with himself. Oh, Brent. Okay, like full... Bad time for Vaughan Smith to take a drink.

So what was he like? How was it? Well, I think we all know how it works. You grab it, don't you, for a start. No, but where was he? Was he in the toilet? No, I went into the workshed to grab some tools and he was lying on this mattress on the floor.

I'm no, now Brad, I'm no Osh officer, but I don't believe one should have one's penis out in the workplace, especially in the workshop part of the workplace. He was lying on a mattress. Well, be comfy. Thanks, everyone. Yeah. Did that? Oh, he

leapt to his feet. He leapt to his feet. I bet he did. And he said, can we keep this to ourselves? I said, yeah, sure. Okay, did you get, well, I mean, ourselves slash the nation. Did you extort him? Did you get a pay rise?

No, but I went and told everyone. Oh, yeah. Can we keep this to ourselves? 100%. Neil never gets what I just said. Hey, Brent, thanks for your call, mate. Chris, what did you walk in on when the door should have been locked? Well, I walked in on some girl walking.

Oh, no, I went into my usual go-to toilet on the way to Smoko. Yeah. And walked into some girl perched up or her leg perched up on the sink and she was shaving her, you know what. What kind of toilet was this? You say you were on your way to smoker. Was it public? Was it just for your work?

It was just on the bus exchange just across from work. The bus exchange? Christ's church. Yeah. That's not a place to give yourself a pubic maintenance. But if you are going to, please lock the door. There's a toilet on the left as well, so... Oh, yeah, you always go to the father's toilet

if you're up to no good. That's the general rule. Is it? Is it? All right, thanks, Chris. You're less likely to get walked on when you're at the end of the cul-de-sac. Is it? Right. Man, we've had some messages

that we can't even see the light of day to me. Yes, I know. To be honest with you, it's not what you see. Megan, it could me. Yes, I know. To be honest with you, what do you see? Megan, it could have been worse. I walked on an old lady who had left the door open, and she was mid-wipe, but she turned around to face the toilet for the mid-wipe.

Wow. Yeah, back out of that one. It's the long weekend. Group test. Yes. Jazz about it. Feeling good. The last couple of Long Weekend Group Tuts have been a success.

But it's now that we always at this stage pay homage to the last Weekend Group Tut and whom got on our Long Weekend Group Tut honours board. Jane in Christchurch. I remember that. Yep. Grace and Dave in Tauranga. Yep. Laurie in Auckland.

And of course, who could forget Puella Hamilton. She was a gem. She drove over a roundabout. A few times. A few times. She drove around it three times and then mounted the curve. Yeah. To get us that toot in Norton.

Now, if maybe you're new to the show or you've never heard the Long Weekend Group Toot, which has been a tradition for how many years now? Oh, many, many moons. Many, eight, seven or eight years? At least, well, I was going to say six, but eight does sound better. It does sound better. The 25 year anniversary. Oh, it's the 25th anniversary of the long weekend group toot.

Yes. Now, this is how the long weekend group toot works. If you're in traffic and there are cars around you, you've got to start the long weekend group toot with this. And you might remember, it's kind of like the old Milo tune. It was on the Milo ad. Yeah. Famously tooting through tunnels and someone replies.

So, by all means, start doing it now. Test the waters. See what's happening around you. Are you getting the toots back? Are the nation ready for the long weekend group toot? And don't wait for it to be broadcast on the radio to reply. If you hear one, just give a little toot toot back. Are the nation ready for the Long Weekend Group Toot? And don't wait for it to be broadcast on the radio to reply. If you hear one, just give a little toot toot back. Yeah.

It's all about bringing the country together. So this is how you start it. And finish it off. If you hear that, like that. Now, we ran a test the other day with a cruise ship. So this is another example of how... I would say the biggest horn that's ever competed in a long weekend group tour.

Easily. All right, long weekend group tour, extreme demonstration, go. Yes. So that is an example of how the long weekend group toot works. If you want to give it a try right now, give us a call. 0800 dials at M. It's the long weekend group toot.

And the Easter edition of the long weekend group toot. Now, this is how it works. You start the long weekend group toot. And then somebody else listening finishes it off. And if this is happening anywhere, reply. Don't wait. This isn't just all about it being on the radio. This is about it, you know, bringing together the nation.

And waking up those people that aren't awake yet. Yeah, because screw them. Get out of bed, you lazy bums. Now, I guess the big tip would be if you're going to do this, you've got to have your phone ready to hear the toot and have it out at the window so that we can hear the horns of the people that are replying. Now, it's a big decision.

Where do we start? Where in the country do we go to first? Let's go to Tauranga. Ella, good morning. How are you? Morning. You're acting like we've just given you an Ed Sheeran VIP. But we aren't.

I watch you guys all the time. Oh, Ella. Well, Ella, I hope this comes off. I hope you nail the toot, and I hope somebody replies to you. Whereabouts in Tauranga are you? We're on, like, the stretch into the main part of it. So I'm, like, half an hour. Is there many cars around you?

There's not. Okay. There's no cars? There's so many cars. So many. So many, not no. Okay. All right.

Well, Ella, when you're ready, give us a... Phone out the window. Yeah. Or maybe not. Have they still got the phone? I didn't just mean throw the phone out the window. I mean, hold on to it. As long as we can hear the toots, when you guys are ready,

kicking us off and maybe being the first person on the honours board for Easter weekend 2018. Ella, take it away. No! I'm not a team player. The climax, the anti-climax I can hear the disappointment Ella, I, yeah

Do we give her another go? Do we give her another go? She's excited to be here Do you want another go, Ella? I'm really excited Yeah, have another go Give her another toot Because you're tooting, by the way

That was a great first toot Outstanding Thank you Okay, go again, Ella Wow first two. Outstanding. Thank you. Okay, go again, Ella. Wow. Ouch. It was actually a cricket! It was actually a cricket!

Thank you. Wow! It was actually a cricket! Yeah, wow! Where did that come from? I don't know. Is there a cricket in the car? Did a cicada get blown into the Corolla? Cicada. All right, let's go to the capital city. Ella, thank you so much.

Crystal, good morning. Good morning. Now, whereabouts in the capital city are you today? I am back at the terrace. Oh, this is good. This is great. I've got a good feeling about this. This is long weekend group two fodder.

Yeah, it is really. It's easy. It's fish in a barrel up there. Well, so they say. Yeah, it is. All right, Crystal, when you're ready, give us a long weekend group two fodder. Yeah, it is really. It's easy. It's shooting fish in a barrel up there. Well, so they say. Alright, Krista, when you're ready, give us a long weekend group two. Alright. No! Not again, not again. That's just happening. It's two in a row.

You said it was shooting fish in a barrel and then it was not shooting fish in a barrel. It was fishing in a depleted area of international waters. Well, this is why we've got fishing quotas now, because we're fishing all the fish. I'm fairly targeting recreational fishermen. Thank you, Crystal. Let's stay in Wellington.

Whereabouts are you, Abby? We are on the motorway, and we're way more excited than Ella. We've got a carpool. We've got a carpool. We've got a carpool. Okay. Well, Abby, give us a long week in group two. Yeah, we're just coming up to some... Approaching traffic.

So we're just approaching some traffic now. So I'll place you right out the window. Okay. All right. When you're ready, take it away. Oh, Wellington. Come on. Oh, my God.

This is a disaster. This is disaster. This is three in a row. Does anyone listen to our show? This is true. Will you give us another chance? I'm willing to. Thanks, Paul.

Appreciate it. Okay, no. You're welcome. Oh, my God. What is happening? Deaf ears. What is happening? Oh, hey, it's not...

Man, I tell you what, we've had some great tutors, too. Some people are really living the tutors. Oh, fantastic tutors. Now, before we go to a song... See, this is why we need it, though, because the mood of the nation, maybe people aren't tuning, they're not happy enough. Someone just said they tutored in a line of traffic on Stadthoe 1 in Rolleston, and someone told them to F up.

But fully use the F word. Right. Not just like you. Sarah in Christchurch, good morning. Good morning. Okay, you're the last one for round one. Break the curse. So let's see if we can break the curse.

Whereabouts in Christchurch are you? We're on Brom Street in Christchurch. Okay, Brom Street in Christchurch. Give us a long weekend group tote. When you're ready. Yes! One on the board! One on the board! One on the board!

Sarah, congratulations. You're going on the honours board. Thank you very much. Yes. Oh, Christchurch, saving the day. Okay, I think we need to come back next, New Zealand. Round two of Long Weekend Group Tour is next. We've broken the drought.

We've broken the drought, but it's still only 4-1. It's the Long Weekend Group Tour. All right, the Long Weekend Group Tweet. And for those that maybe have just joined us, are just tuned in, this is how the Long Weekend Group Tweet works. You call us wherever you are in traffic and you start the Long Weekend Group Tweet.

And somebody listening with your phone out the window finishes off. That's how it works. Somebody, some text messages in on some quick reports. I'm in Glenfield walking along the road. I heard someone do it. I yelled out beep beep as I don't have a car. Oh, bless. Bless you for participating. Thank you so much.

I'm in Wellington. While you didn't hear my toot, I tooted back to both of those cars in Wellington. So let them know they're not alone in the capital city. They're not alone. So it's 4-1. We've had one successful attempt. Yes, Christchurch. Sarah from Christchurch.

On the honours board. All right, now we're going to start now. We're going to start now in the waterfront in Auckland. Good morning, Rachel. Hello. All right, so whereabouts in the waterfront area are you? In your car? I'm on T Street.

So like right by Les Mills. Busy. Okay, busy, busy. This is the first representation from Auckland this morning. It is correct, yes. Okay, well, Rachel, when you're ready, give us a long weekend group toot. Okay. No!

Silence. Silence. It's stuck in Auckland. Now, for a city that was designed in the 1800s and has poor traffic flow, you'd expect a toot back. Yeah, you would. Rachel, great tooting though, but unfortunately...

Do we give Rachel another go? Do you want another go, Rachel? Oh, Vaughn, you do this, but you just... I try to jam myself in traffic and stare at people, but they're just not tooting. Try again then.

Is it an aggressive stare? Give her another go. Try it again, Rachel. Okay, here we go. Okay. Yeah, I knew that would happen. Double disappointment. State Highway 1 slash State Highway 2, Wellington, Nicky.

Good morning. Which one is it? Hi, King. Hi. So where are you? I'm currently coming up to the terrace exit. Oh, we just had a terrace before and it was a disaster. This could be the redeemer.

New cars. If you give me a couple minutes, I'm just coming up to where there's lots of traffic now. Okay, you hold there. We're going to go to... Wait, do you want to go now or two minutes? Two minutes. Two minutes. All right, wait there.

Let's go to Tupata. That's exciting. That's the drama. Emma in Invercargill, good morning. Hi, how are you? Really good. Now, Invercargill, wide roads. Much traffic on the road? Really good. Now, Invercargill, wide roads. Yeah.

Much traffic on the road this morning? I've found some more traffic. Okay, do it. When you're ready, give us a long weekend grip to it, Emma. Oh, my God! Can we... So, when you put your phone, put it up to the window, not out the window. It sounds windy there.

It sounded like you threw us in a paper bag and then rustled us around like we were a chicken schnitzel that you were coating. Hold on. I'll try one. Can I try one more? Yeah. Okay. Oh, my God.

He runs just looking at me like I'm stupid. Emma. Oh, that was great tooting though, Emma. And the cargo. And the cargo. Leading us down. It's never worked that far south, by the way. The only person at Christchurch is as far south as the Honours Board represents.

Not even Dunedin. What about Dunedin? We've not had Dunedin. Ed Sheeran weekend. I feel we've got to try Dunedin. Whereabouts? Do you want to go back to Wellington? Should we go to Wellington?

Let's go back to Wellington. Nicky. Nicky. Nicky. She's gone. We've lost Nikki. Nikki's gone. She got cancelled mid-series.

Let's go to the North Shore. Ryan, good morning. Morning. What's up? Well, you know, it's a bit of a semi-disappointment, Ryan. We've got one from, how many attempts now? One on the board. Eight.

One from eight. All right. Well, maybe I can do it. Okay. How busy is the North Shore of Auckland today? Honestly, I thought there'd be more traffic, so I thought I had it. But let's give it a go. Okay. All right, well, maybe I can do it. How busy is the North Shore of Auckland today? Honestly, I thought there'd be more traffic, so I thought I had it. But let's give it a go.

Okay. All right. Okay. Not confident. Yes! That was it! Well done, Ryan! Oh, that was so good.

My boy. So good. Man. Yes. Yes. And the fact that your car horn sounds like the battle bus on Fortnite, that got me going. Ryan, jeez.

It's a very clicky horn. Yes. The beast. Ryan, wait right there. You are going on the honours board. Auckland, again, on the honours board. Yeah, I believe Nikki's back. Nikki in Wellington, you cut off, but you're back.

Okay. Exciting. Are we ready? I'm ready. Okay, give it to us. All right, here we go. Yes! It was worth coming back for.

The Terrace in Wellington. They sounded right beside you. I know, that sounded really good. Their timing, we might never know who tooted back. No. It was quite fast. I know their timing was impeccable. It was impeccable timing.

I feel like they were a musician, a percussionist. That was great. You're on the board. You're on the honours board. Wait there, we'll get some details. Geri in Timaru, good morning. Good morning, how are you? Really good.

Now, Halsey, what is a traffic jam like in Timaru? Well, I've never driven through it this time, but I'm just coming up to a set of lights, so hopefully... Okay. Okay. Get it. Let's try it.

Okay, go for it. Oh, come on. Oh, that's disappointing. Disappointing. Okay. Thereappointing. Okay. There's more lights. Are you seeing more lights?

How many sets of lights has Timaru got? I would have thought one would have sufficed. It's all lights. Okay. There's no more traffic. Oh, no. There's two cars on the road in Timaru. One of them's tooting and the other one didn't toot back.

So thanks. But thanks for trying. Thank you for trying anyway. Ben, whereabouts in the country are you? Tauranga, mate. Okay. Tauranga. All right.

Whereabouts? Along Hewlett's Road. And you know that traffic and towering is actually a bloody diabolical thing. Mate, this isn't talkback radio. It's like, who am I paying my rates for? All right, Ben. I'll tell you something about the council, mate. Another time, another place.

Call us back in 20 years. Let's do this. Long weekend group shoot in Tauranga. When you're ready. Sweet. Yeah! You hear that? It sounded like you were tapping on some Tupperware.

Your horn sounded like it's a steamer clacking shut, and then someone actually turned it back to it. An aggressive honk, mate. An aggressive honk, you know, if you want to be heard. You sound quite like, you know, like a burlyly bloke and you've got such a petite horn there. Can you just give us one long beep of your horn so we can get a feel for it? Yeah, sure, mate. Oh, it's such a cute wee horn.

It sounds strange. It's almost like the car's going, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour. Love it. All right, Ben, I'll wait there. You're on the honours board bonjour, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour. Love it. All right, Ben, I'll wait there. You're on the honours board. Great news. Kelsey in Hamilton, good morning. Hi.

Hi. You want to give this a crack? Hometown. Whereabouts in Hamilton? I'm just coming up to Victoria Street. Do you know, per capita, Hamilton more represented on the honours board than any other city in the country. So it's looking good for you, Kelsey. When you're ready, give us a long weekend grip

too. Okay. Oh no, you've gone off. No, you've gone off. Not played to the sheet music at all. Not enough beeps, Kelsey. So beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. One, two, one, two, three, one, two, three, four, go.

No, no, no. Better, two, one, two, three, one, two, three, four, go. No, no, no. Better, better, better. Stop beeping. Better. Better. Do you want to go one more go? Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. One, two, count it out, go.

One, two, one, two, three, one, two, three, four. Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Look how far you've come! 30 seconds ago, she couldn't do it. This is the Eddie the Eagle moment of Long Weekend Group 2. She came in, she was like... And we're like, slow down.

Follow my instructions. It's like, you know, movies when someone who's not qualified lands a big plane. Yeah, we were in the control tower. We just did it. There was like a training montage in the middle of the movie.

You just landed that plane, Kelsey, and you were on the long weekend group two. And I think that wraps it up for a successful long weekend group two. And I think that wraps it up for a successful long weekend group two. How many successful attempts, like how many people were on the honours board? Producer Caitlin, how many did we get in the end? We started slow.

We had five. Five successes. Five. Christchurch, Tauranga, Auckland, Wellington. Where was Kelsey? Hamilton. Yes. That's great.

That equals our record of Queen's birthday 2017. Oh, but does that mean we should do one more to beat that record? Yes, we should. I don't want to heap too much pressure on you, Maddie, but you could make Easter 2018 the current record holder for six successful toots. The only shot we have at beating the record. Okay. So, when you're ready.

Whereabouts are you? I'm on the North Western Motorway. I've just gone past the Waterview Turn On. Okay, all right. Good location there. It's a speed camera hotspot, by the way. It is. Yeah.

Ready? For the record. Yep. Wait, wait. Did that, did somebody toot back? Yeah, someone tooted back. They were right on you. They hardly waited for you to finish.

I mean, it wasn't perfectly timed, but I thought those were your toots, but they weren't. Can we hit it one more time? Do you want me to do it again? Yeah, okay, Maddie, let's try again. Yeah. Yeah! We've got a new winner, Easter 2018. Yep. Yes! We've got a new winner, Easter 2018. Yes.

Maddie, legendary tooting. And whoever was tooting back to you. Oh, great tooting. Premature tootilation and I love it. A successful long weekend group toot. Be safe if you're driving anywhere on the roads this Easter weekend. If you're heading to Dunedin as well, from Canterbury for Ed Sheeran, they're spending like, what, 7,000 cars to hit the road?

Yeah. So take lots of time, drive safe, and yay for another successful long weekend group tour. Thank you so much. Still correspondence coming in from the long weekend group tour, our most successful ever. Since we've had the Honours Board. Since we've had the Honours Board. Since we've had the Honours Board.

Yeah. I think we've had higher numbers pre-Honour Board, but do you know it could have been one more? Someone's text in. Yeah. Someone said, I'm ashamed. I'm full of shame. I heard the Auckland Waterfront Tour on Quay Street.

They received no reply. Remember we said this is going to happen and then nothing. I'm an Uber driver and had a rider in the back so didn't turn back. I just lost my chance to be part of history for that five-star lifestyle. And you know what? That's heartbreaking. That's hard to hear. Yeah.

That's hard to hear. I'd give an Uber driver five stars if he did participate. Me too. Because they would have been listening too. They would have heard the someone said on the North West and that was my hubby with the premature tutelation. He wants it made clear he's

not normally like that. He's not a premature tutelator. No. Right. He's not. He's a passionate love lover. He's something else. Alright. It's time for Fact of the Day. Day. Day. Day. Day. A passionate love motor? He's something else. All right. It's time for...

Fact of the Day! Day, day, day, day! Today's fact of the day is Ikea made a pregnancy test. What? Ikea, the furniture kit set outlet place, made a pregnancy test. Do you want to know about this pregnancy test?

Did they make it because they sell everything to do with, like, babies and cots and... Correct. Yeah, you get them at the start. But where they put the pregnancy test was the interesting part. They printed an ad in the newspaper that you cut out and did a wee on, and it could return a positive pregnancy reading. And if it did, you bought in your urine-soaked coupon,

and you got 40% off a baby crib. How does that work? Well, I guess... Is it the same technology that's in one of those sticks? Pregnancy sticks, right? It's just those things that you dip in and they change colour, right? Yeah, and it reacts to the hormone and it changes colour. So I...

They surely would have had to have had... Gloves? Oh, gloves for sure. But I was just thinking, printing it, they would have had to have supplied a lot of the ink. gloves for sure. But I was just thinking, printing it, they would have had to have supplied a lot of the ink. It would have been a very expensive but amazing campaign to run.

Because I've never gone to the supermarket or pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test, but how much do those cost? It depends. You can get like really expensive ones or really cheap ones. Right. So they just would have done

a cheapo version in bulk on paper. I remember with our first, I just bought a cheap one. Yeah. And then when that came back positive, I was like, okay, well,

we better confirm I'll go back and buy a slightly more expensive one. So that one came back positive and I was like, let's just go back and get the top of the line. Let's buy all of them

and make sure. On the shelf. And then, yeah, we bought another one and yeah, it was. But you can get... Right. And the really expensive ones, I think they just look a bit nicer.

They look like Apple might have designed the plastic casing they're in. Right. But this is the literal strips. The ones have, like, a little thin strip and then the other ones have, like, a big ergonomic handle. Yeah. And you need to hold while you piddle on. Like, it's the same thing. Literally. Yeah, yeah, it is. It's just the strip inside and what it's

being held by. So, yeah, it is. It's just the strip inside and what it's being held by. So yeah, the ad came in the paper and you piddled on it and if it turned a certain colour, it was like, congratulations, you're pregnant and you could go in and get a deal on their crib. Could I piddle on that ad and get a TV cabinet? 40% off? Hey, look, if you go into an Ikea with a urine-soaked coupon and you're like, I want a TV cabinet,

they'll probably give you a discount just to get you out their store. It's because you're holding a urine soaked ad. You certainly can get a TV cabinet. Get the hell out. Just around here. You follow us around here.

We'll just drop it in the back car park. What's the old, and I think it's myth, isn't it, that if males pee on a pregnancy test and it comes back positive

they've got some disease. Oh, really? It's like an urban, that if males pee on a pregnancy test and it comes back positive, they've got some disease. Oh, really? It's like an urban legend that if you pee on a pregnancy test and you're a male and it comes back positive, you've got testicular or prostate cancer or something. Right. But it's never been proven. It's just an old myth. So don't do that.

Go and see an actual doctor, probably. Yeah. Or just get one of the cheap ones. So today's fact of the day is IKEA made a pregnancy test. All you had to do was piddle on their ad, and if it came back positive, you got a discount on a crib. Or just get one of the cheap ones. So today's fact of the day is Ikea made a pregnancy test. All you had to do was piddle on their ad, and if it came back positive, you got a discount on a crib. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Last night we now were some friends of friends leaving, going to Australia.

I saw some boomerangs. Do you see boomerangs? Late night cocktail boomerangs. Did you cry? Why? What have you been? Because they're going to Australia. Oh, no, no.

Well, they're just going to Australia, aren't they? Everyone goes to Australia. It's like a suburb of New Zealand. Right. Melbourne and Sydney and Brisbane. Like for good, forever, ever. Yeah, I guess so. Are you trying to make him cry?

He's trying to make me cry. I'm just like, you're so like nonchalant about it. Your friend's like leaving. Well, he's not programmed to feel emotion. He's just, yeah, I don't know what

even you're trying to do here. Anyway, I went to this bar, this really cool bar and it does cocktails. So we had a couple of... Which was a bold move from you on a Wednesday.

I know, I was feeling a bit dusty this morning when a bold move from you on a Wednesday. I know. I was feeling a bit dusty this morning when the alarm went off at 4.30. I was like... But you didn't dare bring a poor attitude because I would have said... No, I didn't. I would have given you a rock.

I know because you can't post drinking cocktails at 10.30 at night and then come to work with a poor attitude. That's exactly right. And wanting people to feel sorry for you. Exactly right. But something happened. I overheard something

happen at this bar that I wanted to mention because it was just a bit awkward. Yeah. Because we spotted quite a few definite Tinder dates

because I was eavesdropping on one conversation and I heard this chick say, I grew up, I grew up here, blah, blah, blah. And that's not something

you'd talk about if you knew the person and they were your girlfriend, right, or your boyfriend. That's getting to know you. That's getting to know you conversation. So that's not something you'd talk about if you knew the person and they were your girlfriend, right? Or your boyfriend. That's getting to know you. That's getting to know you conversation. So that was definitely a Tinder date. And Tuesdays, Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays.

Wendeth? Why can't I say Wendeth? Wendeth. They are big for Tinder dates, aren't they? Yeah, Tuesdays and Wednesdays, biggest Tinder date nights. And so we were kind of looking around the bar in there. But then I went to the bathroom

and this couple came in and I overheard the, what's a maitre d? Are they still a maitre d at a bar? The person that greets you and seats you at the bar? Let's call them that. It's French and it sounds nice. Said to the guy, oh, back here on another date, are you? And it was obviously like a different date.

Maitre d, sabotage. It was like a different date. It was obviously a different date because they looked awkward and like they didn't know each other. And that like they were definitely a Tinder date or an app date. Throwing them under the bus? I know, she totally threw them under the bus. And what was the response like? Like, oh, you're back here because the last one didn't work out and you're always going on dates because you're just useless and single. She may as well have said.

When was this other date? Yesterday? Yeah, I know. How is it going on? Oh, so I'm not the only girl, am I? You're back already. Well, have you got your 10 cocktails card where we stamp it and you get the 10? Yeah.

I just thought. He's absolutely loaded up. I just was like, poor guy. Weird move for the maitre d' to throw someone under the bus like that. But, I mean, it was a great bar to bring someone to it would impress someone what was the guy's response just like

like just laughed it off kind of thing but awkwardly and I was just like this whole thing's awkward weird and then you've got to go sit down

and very unprofessional flabbergasts me the unprofessional nature of the maitre d' you expect you know a certain

I know. Like that patient... Yeah. Confidentiality. I don't know if... Confidentiality. Patient, doctor, confidentiality. Don't they say some sort of...

Don't they recite an oath at the maitre d'? Like a hospital... Like a bar drinking confidentiality. Yeah, like if... In the same code, if the wife rings the bar and says, is Steve there? And you're looking Steve right in the eye. You're like, nah. Definitely not.

They'd see some staff bartenders, eh? When my friends are bartenders, they just always had the best stories and gossip. But then, like, stories and gossip, yay, having to clean up the toilets because some dudes just weed all over the floor, boo. That's why you've got to

get to the dizzying heights of Matra D. You're covered by the door. You don't have to do the cleaning.