ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - May 07 2019

Episode Date: May 6, 2019

Royal baby alert! Day 2 of Megan's facial burns and when did you try and steal someones pet?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Hit music. Lives here. Fletch Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch Vaughan and Megan minus Vaughan today. Who's sick? So it's up to us to, I don't know. Do this. Do the extra work. Do the saying. Do we get paid a bit more today? Doubtful. We can split his for one day. Oh, brilliant. Yeah. Sounds great. He set that up so well yesterday, though. Don't look at us like you're getting some, aren't you? I can't

wait for an extra sweet treat. It's definitely... He did do some pre... I don't think I'll come in tomorrow. Oh my god, my nose. And then he was huffing all this oil all day. We're like, he's 100% not going to be here tomorrow. Yeah. Great groundwork. I'd be a 100% not going to be here tomorrow. Yeah.

Great groundwork. I'd be a bit sus if it was a Friday today. Yeah. But it's a Tuesday. Yeah. So the royal baby has been born. A baby boy. They haven't named it, have they?

No. The news article I was reading, Arthur, Philip, Charles, Alexander, James and Alfred were the top picks from bookmakers. What, seven names at the top picks? Yeah. Then it's not going to be any of those. Do you reckon? Nah. You don't think Megan will let that fly?

Nah. I reckon she's just going to pick something a little bit left of centre. Shane. Prince Shane. Prince Shane. A one syllable tune. Shane. Prince Bob. Oh, Bob's kind of cute. Prince Bob, yeah. syllable tune. Shane. Prince Bob.

Oh, Bob's kind of cute. Prince Bob, yeah. That's pretty cute. Bob's also a minion name as well. Yeah. Also cute. I hope it's something left of centre. Just to get at the queen a little bit.

Yeah. All right, you lot. Listen up. It's story time. All right, Storytime. And normally with Vaughn here, Megan, you'd deliberate, you'd debate over which headline.

What story he wanted? No. But today, it's all your pick. You get to choose. So, would you like headline one, police conduct sting operation after hive thefts? Or headline two. Okay, the first one's about being stung by bees.

Second one, surprise washing machine accessory. Yeah. Did someone find something in their washing machine? No. Oh. Well, anyway, I want number three because it's vague. Surprise knock at the door. Surprise knock at the door.

All right. We go to the UK. You might need your tissues. Oh, shit. Okay. For this. Because Helen Hancocks, now she has been given just days to live. Oh my God.

Days to live. This is quite a sad story. This has only just come out. Yeah. Now she is at home, I'm guessing for her final days. Yeah. She's as comfortable as she can be. And she is in a bed.

They've propped it up and she's got the TV there so she can watch TV during the day. I know this story. And then on the television came an alpaca. Oh, no, I don't know the story. Oh, what did you think was going to happen? No, wait, carry on. I'll just check right to the end. Well, I mean, it's pretty obvious what's going to happen, right?

So anyway, this alpaca comes on. Yeah. And she's like, oh my God, I would love to stroke an alpaca. But I don't think I can because it's my final days and I'm dying. I've only got days to live. Oh, wow. This is really sad, Helen, but I don't know that that would be my dying wish. You know?

What would your dying wish be? Well, something maybe a bit more thrilling. Like to meet someone awesome, like Beyonce. But you've got three days to live and you're saying, can you organise a meet and greet with Beyonce? It's not going to happen, Megan. Yeah, right. She's keeping it manageable. Keeping her expectations low.

Exactly. Okay. Well, that is when her friends decided to make that dream come true. Oh, isn't he adorable? Oh, you're beautiful. Oh, you're gorgeous. She's got a budgie. She also has a budgie.

You're beautiful. And so her friends brought the alpaca into the bed. Here's a photo. Oh, she's so stoked about it. And go again. Oh, bless her wee heart. She's so stoked. I mean, it's my Beyonce, but I'm glad it made her happy.

It's an alpaca. Close. Oh. Yeah. Close. Yeah. Okay. She said to the alpaca, I'm very happy to have met you. You won't half make me remember you. It was incredible, fabulous, and she thanked her friends and family.

That's so sweet. And I don't know, like, it doesn't say, she must still be alive. If you could just keep your dying wishes manageable too, that'd be great. Because, I mean, I could get you an alpaca. But not Beyonce. No. I'm an employee, but I'm also an employer now.

Oh, with your cafe. Well, I have staff I have to manage. And there's new rules. and there's new rules. And there's new rules. That has come into place for when it comes to like rests and meal breaks. Yeah. So this is something you need to know too if you're an employee.

And this just started yesterday. Yeah. Because there used to be these rules but then National got into government and then they got rid of them. And now the Labour government are like, okay, now you can have breaks again. And everyone's like, that's so lovely. Thank you.

Yeah. See, I'm stuck now because I'm like, I don't want people to have breaks, but I'm also an employee, so I want breaks. You don't want people to have breaks. No, you know. Work harder. Crack the whip. No, I do want them to have breaks. No, you know. Work harder. Crack the whip.

No, I do want them to have breaks. I just need them to be when it suits. When it's not busy in the cafe. But that's the thing. I guess every business is different. Like if you work by yourself and you're like, I want one of these entitled 10-minute breaks, what do you put a sign on the shop door and shut the door?

Yeah, I don't know. I would. Because there would be people that, just off the top of my head, I'm thinking like clothing shops, you know, like sometimes you go in there and there's one staff member. So when do they get a break?

Yeah. Because quite often you'll go to like a dairy or a store where there's one person working and they've just got to back in five minutes. And you're like, I know you're on the toilet right now. Yeah, I hadn't thought about that. Because you can't just leave a shop unattended

and just be in the toilet for five minutes. And you're busting. Yeah. So the't thought about that. Because you can't just leave a shop unattended and just be in the toilet for five minutes. And you're busting. Yeah. So the new rules say that if you have worked a, well, if you work between two and four hours of work, or that's your shift, employees are entitled to a paid 10-minute break in the middle of their shift.

Now, so we've been at work an hour, so at 20 past seven, I'm just going to let nothing happen on the radio, Caitlin, producer Caitlin. Megan and I are going to sit here for 10 minutes and take what we are entitled to. We'll make a cup of tea and go to the toilet. We'll make a cup of tea. And I'm not playing any music because that's my job is to play the music. Oh, see, that's going to be really annoying for people listening.

So could you maybe take your 10 minute break later in the day, like 2pm? No, because that's not what the law says. Right, okay. And there's more. If you work between four and six hours, you are entitled to a paid 10-minute break either side of a 30-minute meal break. So you have a 10-minute break, of a 30 minute meal break. So you have a 10 minute break,

then you have a meal break later, then you have another 10 minute break. Why are you looking at me like I'm in charge of this? Because you always tell us off when we're not working. Yeah, because you're annoying. That's a different thing.

That's in like a 30 minute meal break. There'd be so many people that don't actually get that. Right. Why is Antonania looking up a lawyer in the phone book? A phone book. She won't even have a phone book anymore.

It's on my desk at all times. Yeah. Never go anywhere without it. But I don't think our job is strenuous enough to like I mean, we're just sitting here aren't we? Well, you know. Exactly. We have the kind of job where you just go right through and then you have a rest. Yeah, and technically we can have a rest like every time a song plays.

For a minute. Yeah. But that's the thing. Sometimes we have to go to the toilet in a two and a half minute song. And two and a half minute songs for some reason are trendy at the moment. They are. Two fifty, two thirty. You're screwed if it's number twos.

I mean, this is a lot of information early in the morning. It is, yeah. Hey, if you need to go number twos, Megan, you just tell me and I'll find a song that's long. Okay. That can be your ten minute break. Harry Styles has that five minute song. That's the last time we played a five minute song was that song.

It goes on a bit. But, yeah, keep that in mind today. If you end up working all the way through, you can literally demand it. See, I kind of like those workplaces where as long as you do your work, you know, It doesn't matter when you're doing it, Doesn't matter when you take a break

and, you know, there's these studies that 40-hour work weeks are good as long as you get your work done, work's happy. Yeah. You just want to work from home, don't you? Yes. We should all have a studio.

Just in bed. In our lounge or in our bed. Sounds great. ZM's Fletch, Va In our lounge or in our bed. Sounds great. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Bad news if you love fish. I don't. Eating them, looking at them. Because apparently saltwater fish extinction will be seen by 2048.

Oh my God. Like do the maths on that. We'll probably also be alive unless that big asteroid gets us in a few years. That's 29 years, right? 29 years. So add 29 to your life right now and that's when there will be no fish in the ocean. Wow. That's according to some economic economists and ecologists. So they've all got together and studied trends and data,

quite a lot of it. So it's quite a serious study. They've studied a lot of data. They've studied a lot of data. And yeah, they are saying that they're shocked and disturbed by how consistent the trends down are beyond anything they expected. And it's happening faster than anyone predicted.

And it's happening faster than anyone predicted. And it's happening now. So already 29% of edible fish and seafood species have declined by 90%, a drop that means the collapse of these fisheries. So does that mean there's no turning back now? Like if we all stopped eating fish and seafood, can we turn it around? Well, yeah, I guess.

But it's also like the pollution that's going into the sea. Yeah, right. Whoopsies. Yeah. Big whoopsies. So is that related to scientists have said we've entered our sixth wave of extinction? It's like scientists have said this, so within the next few decades, there are millions of species

that are at risk of extinction, and a lot of those are species that humans rely on to survive. Well, like bees. Like bees. If bees go, we're done, they reckon. Yeah. Grim years this morning.

You realise how few bees there are these days? Like if you have a garden and then they flower, but you don't get any fruit or any, like, because I had pumpkins, and if the bees don't pollinate the flowers, then you don't get any fruit or any like, because I had pumpkins and if the bees don't pollinate the flowers then you don't get pumpkins. So there's all these flowers and stuff happening but there's no pumpkins. So you've got no pumpkins? Yeah. Because they need to be fertilised by the bees.

Why aren't the bees at your house? Well there's no bees around. That's sad. That's actually sad. Yeah. So I don't know what we're supposed to do. It is pretty crazy. It's actually depressing, isn't it, to think about. Yeah.

Cool, okay. Climate change is not real, is it? No. Nah, it's just bad. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. I was about to ask you this, but you don't have a car. I can drive. Yeah, and you can still reminisce on those days when you used to have a car. So every person now in New South Wales, in Australia,

if you are caught with any alcohol on your breath, you will lose your license. Any? There is now a zero tolerance for drink driving and drug driving. So you will be slapped with a $561 fine. I don't know why that price. It's really messing with me. I know when something's a

price and it's uneven numbers and there's no real, like round it up. $550 or $600? But then like a fine that the police give you, it's uneven numbers and there's no real, like round it up. Go $550 or $600. But then like a fine that the police give you, it's not a special, it's not like $999. You know, because the reason they price things with nines. $999 because it's 10 sounds more expensive. Yeah, because 10 sounds more expensive, but it's a fine, so you just pay it. Yeah.

And then do they have to like calculate it from certain you know like administrative costs and it comes to $561. If you get done drink driving in Sydney or New South Wales, you don't go to court? You just lose your licence and you get a fine? Yeah. Is that the idea? But you could contest it? It's not like if you've been done drink driving

because you kind of in your mind think drink driving is when you're over the limit. This is any alcohol. I know, because that always, when I did have a car, was always my biggest worry, because I'd never drink drive. If I was drinking, just wouldn't drive, just get an Uber, taxi, whatever. Yeah. But it's that Sunday morning when you're hungover and you're like, I'll give it a bit.

Oh, I didn't think about that. I'll give it a bit. Yeah. But you know, it's like, how much do you give it? Yeah. And then like- Because you could still be over by a tiny fraction. You'd still be maybe a little bit under the limit.

But it's still touch and go, isn't it? That was my only ever concern. That eliminates a beer or wine on Friday afternoon, like with work. That eliminates, like, work drinks, like during lunch. Even if you're going out for lunch like, you can't even risk having a wine with your lunch. What if there's like a sauce that's got some wine in it?

Like you could literally like have a really nice meal. Or like cough medicine. Yeah. Wow. But I'm for it. I'm not against it, yeah. Because yeah, I'm the same opinion. If I'm going out I'm either drinking or I'm not drinking. Yeah.

So if I'm having drinks at all, I'm not driving. And I think that's something we all should... But that certainly would, yeah, put you off, wouldn't it? Yeah. Because we all know that drinks affect people differently. So even if everyone thinks they can have two drinks, if I had one wine, you know me, like I'm like tipsy AF. I wouldn't drive.

Yeah, I think it's a good rule. But yeah, in New South Wales, you'll immediately lose your licence now. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. A study's been done about using your phone during shopping. Like, say you go to the

supermarket. And you're on your phone. The mall, you're on your phone. And apparently 93% of those in the study, before they did the study, took part, they asked, you know, do you use your phone while you're out? 93% said yep. Yeah. I do because your shopping list is on your phone

or you're like messaging your partner being like, what do we need or something. Or you're just scrolling through the gram. Yeah, you're just scrolling through. You know what you kind of need to get at the supermarket. Well, apparently they had a whole lot of volunteers as part of the study, more than 230 volunteers, were asked to go into a supermarket or a store

and complete a simulated shopping task. Okay. And now either they had to use their phones during this or they had to keep their phone in their pocket or they had to use it every now and again. Okay. So they were handed a list and asked to compare the items which ended up in their basket in each of these three scenarios.

So you were allowed, you didn't have to stick to the list. You were just left to your own devices. You're allowed to put in there whatever you wanted. Pretty much. In most cases, heavy phone use led to a considerable distraction and more unplanned purchases. So apparently if you're on your phone, when you're in the supermarket or a store, you're going to make some unplanned purchases. Right.

The only exception in that regard was if you see a product and you're like, oh, I'm going to research it on my phone. Maybe I'm going to look it up or I need to find a certain thing. If it was related to that specifically, then it didn't put you off as much. It didn't distract you as much. Okay. So don't look at your phone. So basically, yeah. Did they take into account whether you're hangry or not? Because

you know you're not supposed to go to the supermarket when you're hungry. Oh, that's probably another study. You get everything. If you're hangry and you're distracted, you're probably buying everything. Yeah. Like, you have to really control yourself not to get everything in the supermarket. Pretty much. So, what are you supposed to do?

Just like... Well, I guess maybe just have a list and put it in your pocket. Okay. But then, I mean, I guess I probably use mine definitely when I'm in line for the checkouts. Do you know, I saw someone using an actual paper, like written down list the other day with a pen. What, like how did this work? What they wrote on the list? Yeah.

What they needed. There's like this contraption that has ink in it. Yeah. And then they had this other, another hand like a piece of paper. Right. And they scribbled words down on it. Old school.

And then as they got the items, they crossed it off. I was like, wow, retro. I know, because you can get like shopping list apps and stuff. Can you? Even those like smart fridges that you can get with, you know, the screens on them. Or you can even speak to your fridge or your home device or whatever. You need toilet paper.

And hey, yeah, hey, Alexa or Siri or whatever, we need toilet paper. Add it to the list. And then can you just be like, send the list to my phone? Yeah, and then when you're in the supermarket, look it up and stuff. These fridges can work out what's, you can like dial into your fridge while you're in the supermarket and be like, do we have enough milk? Oh my. Oh no, we're low.

Gosh. Yep. How the other half live. I know. So fancy. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. I'm very excited to announce that Megan and myself had a baby boy early this morning, a very healthy boy.

Mother and baby are doing incredibly well. It's been the most amazing experience I could ever possibly imagine. How any woman does what they do is beyond comprehension but we're both absolutely thrilled He saw something I've seen some things guys and joining us on the phone right now is

London correspondent and my old flatmate Joy Reid, good morning Hello, how are you? Very good. Now whereabouts are you situated at the moment? Literally right outside Windsor Castle. So, yeah, on the grounds near the baby. Probably only about a kilometre away from the baby itself, we think.

But actually, I can't quite get there. So, where did Harry make his announcement? Just in the stables near his home. So we had the Queen's horses in there behind him as he was making it. So really, really close to the home, which is certainly fuelling the strongly held rumour that Meghan gave birth at home. We know that was her wish to do that.

And one would certainly think that that has happened considering that announcement was made not outside a hospital, but just down the road from his newly renovated home at Frogham Cottage. Because there was lots of speculation that she'd had it a couple of days ago and she'd kept it quiet. But now it's been confirmed that it was 4.30pm London time. Is that right? 4.30pm New Zealand time.

So 5.30am London time. So in the very early hours of this morning. But we always knew, the palace had always said that, look, when she goes into labour, the media will get an email, you'll find out when she's in labour, then we'll tell you when the baby was born. So we got this email at about two o'clock this afternoon. So we're talking several hours after the baby had arrived. We got an email to say she was in labour.

So of course we all rushed out to Windsor thinking, oh, this is exciting. And then an hour after that, Prince Harry came out and did that delightful interview saying that the baby had in fact been born several hours beforehand. We weren't expecting to see him. They were planning to, you know, keep things private for the next couple of days. But he was clearly just beaming and overjoyed. He wanted to be the one to share the big news with the world, that he was now a father of a new son.

And as I say, he came out with the Queen's horse in the background and gave us an update. So what about the name for this baby boy? They haven't announced the name, but are there any front runners? Well, that's the big question everyone seems to be asking at the moment. In fact, Harry said that they were still thinking about names. The fact that the baby was overdue had given them a little bit more time. But that's the next challenge for them. The bookies, I mean, obviously the Brits love to make bets on these sorts of things. And the bookies are certainly favouring Arthur as the front

runner, followed closely by the likes of Alexander, Oliver, Philip and James. They're very traditional names. But don't forget, this is the first Anglo-American member of the royal family. So we might see something a bit more American. Shane. Yeah, I'm hoping for Shane. Cody. Prince Cody. That's got a rat bag.

You just never know. Yeah, that's got rat bag written all over it, eh? Prince Cody. What? Sounds like an RTV. There's certainly a lot of people, you know, gunning for some pretty crazy names here. But, I mean, the British families do stick with tradition. But as I say, this couple aren't the couple that do stick with tradition.

As I say, they had a home birth, we believe they had a home birth, which, of course, you know, breaks with what's happened in the last couple of generations in their line of family. So, you know, they may break with tradition in the royal family and in terms of the royal name as well. So we'll just have to wait and see. A couple of days, I think, is what we're expecting before we find that out. And it's going to be a couple of days

before we see this little delight as well, a couple wanting to celebrate privately as a family. Meghan Markle's mother is with them at Broadmoor Cottage. So Doria Ragland's there too. So they'll celebrate together. And then a couple of days, you know, there's not quite the same pressure to come out looking glamorous on the hospital steps.

A couple of days, we'll see. Well, thank you so much. Live from London. I guess you're like our royal baby correspondent, Joy Reid. Thank you. My pleasure. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. This is so interesting.

It's talking about couples and where you argue and what it means about you and your relationship. So just think about, I mean, we argue everywhere, but like your most favourite place and somewhere where it happens most often. Where do you argue with Mr Toyboy the most? The car. Yeah. After a long day at the cafe?

It could be anything. Or after Kmart? Yeah, after we've been shopping. After shopping. After we long day at the cafe. It could be anything. Or after Kmart. Yeah. After we've been shopping. After shopping. After we've been anywhere. When he looks in the back seat, he's like, I thought you weren't going to buy anything.

Producers. Producer Caitlin, firstly. In your new relationship. With your new boyfriend. Because I've got a boyfriend. Have you guys had an argument? A big row yet? We've had like, he didn't think it was one,

but I thought it was one. I was like really proud of it. I wanted to, you know, make it like a big thing. Like a Facebook memory. So in two years, you can be like, two years ago, first argument. First argument. I was like, babe, we just had our first argument. And I was like really excited.

It can't have been that serious. Where was it? It was in the car. Because it was on the way to the airport because we were both fighting about who made us late. It was actually his fault, but he said it was my fault. Right. It was my fault. What about you, James?

Producer James? Where do you and your girlfriend argue the most? To be honest, I can't really think about a time that we did because I'm just so... Oh my God. I know it sounds so cliche but I'm very much like meh. You just do what you're told. Yeah, I either do what I'm told or

if I don't actually know when she's having to go because I'll just very much be like, oh there you are, sweet. I can actually imagine that. I can imagine that. You have such a super chill exterior but inside are you, swearing or nah? Uh, nah.

You're like a hundred-year stoner. You're just like, ooh. Yeah, no. Not that I can think of, no. Is that off your chest now? Right, what about you, Antonia? Oh, you and Andy would have a few tests, wouldn't you? Yeah, we're feisty.

I didn't want to say that. Because I'm a Leo and he's an Aries, which means we're both very stubborn. Right. So we have two hot places that we always fight, either the car or because we live with my mum and dad, we have to be quite discreet about it. So it's always in bed and we're always like, don't you dare do that. And we have to do it with a very hushed tone. Because we don't want mum and dad to hear.

It's like a hushed argument. Yeah, how could you do that? I can't believe it. Yeah, it's just like. Force whispers. Very, like it's an angry game of Chinese whispers. Okay, so with that in mind. So the car's the most popular say out of us.

So the car is, if that's the place that you're having most of your arguments, it means that it's arguments about who's in charge. These are control and power plays. Oh, okay. Modern couples like to feel they are equal, but underneath one half often feels less powerful than the other. So what about when you're in the car on the way to Hamilton, aren't you? And you're having one of your arguments.

Because you're like, not Hamilton again. So when we hit Huntley, I'm like, I want to be in my own bed. So those are arguments about power play, which I think is like pretty, that's okay because it's not like there's something wrong in your relationship. Right. If you have arguments in the kitchen now none of us

see the kitchen and it's mostly because they say it happens first thing in the morning like if you go into the kitchen there's unwashed dishes

yeah or you're arguing about someone drinking out of the milk bottle or something like that yeah so if you're most of your arguments

are in the kitchen it's about appreciation so someone feels like they're being taken for granted. The person is always stacking the dishwasher or cleaning the dishes. Pretty much. Yeah, right. If you have a row in public, I never, never do. Because I don't want anyone to see that.

Or you just have that. Like if I, I'll have a tantrum and I stamp my foot every now and then but then I get told off and I'm like did you really just stamp your foot on me but that's more about

I want to buy something and I've been told I'm not allowed but never an argument but if you have arguments in public what does that mean this is

someone is feeling repressed so because they know if they have an argument in public they have to keep it muted and then they're going to have to like stomp it out really quickly because there's lots of people around. Yeah. So someone feels a bit repressed in the relationship.

But they feel it's better to do it in public. Because they want to put it out there and then like have it finish real quick. Right. They don't want it to drag on. They want it to be over real quick. Right, okay. The living room is, it says here it's apparently the worst place to argue because the TV screen doesn't want it to drag on. They want it to be over real quick. Right, okay. The living room is, it says here, it's apparently the worst place to argue because the TV screen doesn't mean that you're engaged.

So someone might be arguing and the other person's like looking away and distracted. Yeah. But for people who argue, it's about issues secondhand. So people are often afraid of speaking their mind or they worry an argument will get out of hand. So you do it in the living room where there's a distraction. Oh, right.

So if it gets awkward or too much, you can just be like, Oh, Shortland Street. Yeah. But just remember, if you argue a lot, my relationship therapist said that it's not how often you argue, it's how quickly you make up. James and Chanel, there you go. I don't know what it means if you're literally not arguing.

Yeah, no. I think that's probably because I'll just go straight cold face and go silent. And maybe that's even worse because she sort of looks and I'll just be like... James, blink twice. Are you feeling repressed? Do you need help?

Are you being held hostage, Gail? Either that or you should write a book. Because if you're not arguing, you must have some secrets. Some relationship secrets. Maybe. Yeah. I'll start thinking of some pointers. I'll bring them in tomorrow.

Okay. Smile and nod. Just do what you're told and just be chill. Yeah. There you go. Short book. That seems to work. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. Well, it's been confirmed and the details have been revealed on how Jacinda Ardern, Prime Minister Jacinda, was proposed to. It happened at the top of Mokotahi Hill in front of a few witnesses and after, or at her post-Cabinet press conference, she gave away a few deets. It was Clark, myself, a member of the DPS, so very intimate. I have not been trying to hide our news from anyone.

It simply doesn't fit on the right finger, so that's why it's sitting in the middle. I was surprised by the question, and look, as with probably many other couples, it means we haven't made many plans, in fact, any plans at all. When you watch the whole post-cabinet conference, that didn't sound awkward, that awkward, but it was very awkward. There were a lot of gaps. She didn't really want to talk about it. But you imagine she's like running the country.

I know. Everyone wants to know this little tidbit on her personal life. It's a weird shift for her. One reporter was like, can you show us the ring? Hold up the ring. And she's like, no, I won't be doing that. Do you know what I mean? That's a very weird situation to put a prime minister in to have to talk about and to get all,

she doesn't want to get all gushy because that's not her. She doesn't want to put that character out there. I understand that. And she didn't initially want to reveal really anything. But I guess by doing the press conference, she gets all the questions out at once and then she expects to not have to answer them again. But Clark did not get down on one knee.

Yeah, so she was asked that and she just said that the DPS, the Diplomatic Protection Service. Or the Secret Service. The Secret Service. They had no idea what had happened so that should be a bit of a giveaway. That he didn't get down on one knee. Right. I wonder if he asked her dad if he made the

call. You'd say so. Yeah. But yeah, she was pretty coy about it. She said that a dog tried to eat the chocolate that Clark gave her. So it was all very romantic and there was a few select people wandering around watching. There were a couple of randoms around. Yeah. It always would be so awkward if you're out in public because both times I've been proposed to, I've not had any witnesses. Right.

So it's been like, you know, a private moment. Yeah, I'd be waiting until the people left. Yeah. But then you've always got a secret service guy right there. Yeah. So I guess it's never

going to be private, is it, when you're the Prime Minister? Fleshfauna Megan, the podcast, ZM. So Sunday afternoon slash evening,

I was like, treat yourself. You've had a weekend working in the cafe. And I was like, I'll have a bath and then I'll treat myself and do like a little face mask. I do lots of face masks, by the way.

All different kinds. I'm kind of addicted. It's my thing. But this was like a little gel under eye. The little gel pads. So you put the pad on under your eye. So it's not a liquid, it's a pad. No, it's like a little gel.

And then once it's kind of dry, you peel it off. And they say like 10, 20 minutes. And it wouldn't have been. Megan, you've burnt under your eyes. Yeah. And you're like 10, oh, maybe 20 minutes. I don't know. It wouldn't have been.

Shouldn't you know? I think it says 15 to 20 minutes maybe. How long was it on your face? Wouldn't have been much more than 20 minutes. Because you've burnt your face. You did this Sunday night and you were messaging us group chat this morning at 4am in pain, in agony still, and last night. So yesterday, yeah, when I came to work I put makeup on and I think that was a bad mistake

because it's just, I've got constant burning, itchy skin. But then you put more makeup on this morning. I know because I didn't want you to see it. Oh my God. Don't put, you've got to, we'll get some makeup wipes or something. Yeah, I might take it off. Because you can't, you've got to let it breathe and heal. So essentially, I guess it's like a burn. It's red, it's itchy, it's burny. It's like a chemical burn.

Yeah. It really is. Now, I don't know, I don't really want to say the brand of what it was because it's hugely popular and I have sensitive skin. Say the brand. So it may just be my skin. Okay. Do you actually want me to say it?

I think people should know. So if you have sensitive skin, be careful when you use Sephora's under eye gel mask. This is a very popular one, isn't it? Doesn't everyone use it? Everyone loves Sephora. And I've used their sheet mask before and it's been fine.

So the sheet mask is the funny one I always see girls on my Instagram using. And then you look real funny. And you look like a murderer. Yeah. The white paper mask. Not that it's just a gel under the eye. So what the white paper mask comes out already wet like a moist towel or whatever

and you just put it on. I just love that I have to explain this to you. I've never done a face mask or anything. It comes out wet and you put it on and it unfolds into like a mask. But did you not read the instructions properly for this eye gel? The instructions literally say take out of the bag and put on for 15 to 20 minutes. And then take off. Were you longer than 20 minutes?

No, no. What is in this thing? Because it can't be good if it's burning your skin. So I have a friend of mine has looked up the ingredients. It has citric acid in it, which is just like lemon juice, right? Essentially. I mean, it might be from a different source. But why would you put acid on your skin?

I know, right? Especially on your under eyes. Yeah. But there's extracts from like a beaver's... Vanilla. Does it smell like vanilla? Well, it could be from that. Because vanilla beaver extract... Comes from beaver's bums. ...is a vanilla scent, isn't it?

Yeah. Yeah. So that coupled with the fact that it's like burnt me, I've decided I'm not going to use these under-eye masks anymore. Any brand, anything. It's put you off. I'm going to... And I know this about myself,

so I'm a little bit annoyed. I need to just use natural stuff. So I'm just, I'm not gonna do the under eye masks anymore and I'm not gonna do anything that has ingredients in it that I don't know what it is.

Because you read the back and you're like, oh, it's like colors and extracts. A lot of moisturizers that you see, you look at the ingredients and you're like,

what is half this stuff? And if you put stuff on your skin, it goes so quickly, like, into your bloodstream. You wouldn't eat it. Why do you want to? But no, like, it's burning. And I've had antihistamines. I've had to put Bepanthen all over my face. What's that?

It's that, oh, you wouldn't know it. You put it on baby's bums, rashes and stuff. Right, okay. I have a tube because I'm extremely rashy. Right. All the time. But I had to have panthen over my whole face and cold flannels. Like, I'm not exaggerating. And it's still burning.

It's still burning. And it's Tuesday morning. You did this on Sunday at what time? Would have been about 5pm. Jeez. So, yeah, just be careful. This is my warning. But I would like to talk this morning about what you've been scared of.

What you will never go to or use again after a bad experience. Right, so what put you off something for life? And it doesn't need to be like a beauty product. No. It could have just been anything. Because I know a lot of people watch documentaries and they just change. Oh, I'm a huge one for that. But it never lasts.

Like I'm sworn off it for like six months and then I'll go back to it. You're like, oh, right, I won't eat chicken. Yeah. And then like a week later. And then you eat fried chicken and you're like, oh, okay. Okay. So that documentary is good. Yeah.

I'll just maybe have chicken and fried chicken every two days. Yeah. So talk to me in six months and I'll probably be doing eye masks again. Okay, so whether it was a bad experience with a beauty product or anything, what put you off something for life? Give us a call, 0800 DALES AT M. You can text 9696. So Megan put a face mask on.

Eye masks. An eye mask, sorry. Sunday night and you're still burning. It is... It's rashed up. And it's quite unbearable isn't it It's burning and itchy Like your whinge level

Complaining level is Nine out of ten At least I'm not ten out of ten Thanks It's not that bad What visually Not as bad as when What was wrong

You haven't even been going on about your carpal tunnel this much No because my face is on fire, Fletch. My face is literally burning. So you've been put off face masks. You've decided that's it. I'm done. Anything that you don't know the ingredients of, if it's not natural, you're put off for life. I don't want another situation like this again.

Do you think six months, a year, you'll forget? Yeah, 100%. Or you'll just give another face or eye mask another go? Yeah. So we'd like to know this morning what you've been put off for life. Nina, what put you off for life? It was deodorant, actually, the Rexona clinical protection stuff.

It gave me some massive boils under both my armpits. That was two years ago, and I haven't touched any deodorant in any supermarkets ever since. So what, do you just go natural? Yeah, you have to. I think it's maybe allergic to the aluminium, because that's like blocked up where it's always been.

Oh, right. Because I, way back, because I've got quite sensitive skin, I just go for any deodorant without, like, I use Rexona, that's fine, without alcohol. Fragrance. Or, yeah, you can just use the sensitive stuff, like Nivea, Rexona, they've all got kind of one with no alcohol. Yeah. And no, because that just use the sensitive stuff like Nivea, Rexona, they've all got kind of one with no alcohol. Yeah. And no, because that just, that got me like back in the day. Well especially

if you're shaving your armpits, you're technically breaking open like the skin, you're scratching the surface of the skin and then you're putting you know, like deodorant in there. Yeah. Well yeah, because some people just use like crystals and rub something. My aunt uses crystals. I don't know.

How does it, like, you just rub it against the skin? I don't know. Do you have to wet the crystal? No, I don't think so. You just rub it on. I'd rather have burns or boils under my arms. She's special.

Tyler, what put you off for life? Like a hair remover that you put on your face and it gets rid of the little hairs on your face. You mean a cream. Are you sure you're supposed to you put on your face And it gets rid of the little hairs on your face You mean a cream Are you sure you're supposed to put it on your face Yeah it specifically says like Facial for your face Because yeah I use hair removal cream

Once and it did not end well I was like even I was within the time limit He took skin off his butthole It wasn't all my I didn't do that Megan the time limit. He took skin off his butthole. It wasn't all my fault. I can't say I didn't do that. Megan! But it does say on most of these products you're supposed to do a test patch.

Yeah, but nobody does a test patch, do they, Tyler? We've got no time for wasting time with a test patch. No, but I used it two or three times too before it gave me a chemical burn all over my face so I thought I was all good. Not two or three times in a row? Oh, no, no. Like, I did it, like, once every, like, couple months.

Oh, right. Right. Yeah. Jeez. Yeah, you've got to be careful. Yeah. This is a good advertisement for test patches. You can do laser now, can't you?

Yeah, all that. Which is a lot, yeah, a lot better. Thanks for your call. Susie, what put you off for life? Working in a dairy, choc-dipped ice cream. Do not go there. What?

No! Susie, you're ruining childhoods here. I know, I know. But I used to work at a... I used to work at a classic kiwi dairy back in the day. Yeah. And the choc-dipped ice cream obviously quite popular in summer,

but in winter, it's sort of a no-go. Yeah. But it's just a big pot of chocolate that just solidifies and sits there on the counter for months and months on end. So...

You're saying that they don't... ...crack it back on. They don't recycle the chocolate. They just chuck it on. Yeah, just check that health rating on the wall. Yeah, but no, it's heated though. Kills the germs. Only when we turn it on. Yeah, just check that health rating on the wall. Yeah, but nuts. It's heated though.

Kills the germs. Only when we turn it on. But I'm sure there's a lid on that chocolate right though when it's not being used. Is there? I don't know. Oh, Susie, what are you doing? I'm ruining a lot of childhoods here. But I

just go by the adage, if it doesn't make you sick, then it's all good. Yeah, like you're not going to get like Camp Labacter from chocolate, are you? Just chicken. Yeah. Yeah. And even if you do get sick, you might lose a couple of kgs. So, you know, always a plus side.

Thanks, Susie. I will not be put off chocolate dip ice cream. No. Some text messages in. Someone had a rough night out, but before they did, they had a king size thing of hummus and so when the hummus came back

now they can no longer eat it if you get my dad I've had that before with certain foods I remember once when I was a kid we went

pick your own boysenberries and I ate a whole container of boysenberries I got sick and that's what I spewed up so I can't eat

boysenberries since but then sometimes I do that's your own fault yeah yeah yeah spewed up so I can't eat boysenberries since. But then sometimes I do. That's your own fault. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's also why I can't drink Midori and Jim Beam. Someone's had lime cordial,

lime raro that they can no longer touch anymore after that's come back up. There's a lot of things. Food ones, yeah. I'll never use false eyelashes again.

Do you want to have a guess why? Glue their eyelashes shut? Exactly. Or their eyelids shut? See, a lot of these are on the user. They're on you. Yeah, but see, I reckon your face mask is on you too because you've left it on too long.

No, I swear I followed the instructions. Vaguely, maybe. We'll see. We'll update you tomorrow with how Bernie Megan's face is. Flesh Fauna Megan. The podcast. ZM. We have a royal baby.

It has been announced that Megan gave birth to a boy, a baby boy this morning, and making the announcement was Prince Harry. I'm very excited to announce that Megan and myself had a baby boy early this morning. A very healthy boy. Mother and baby are doing incredibly well. It's been the most amazing experience I could ever possibly imagine.

How any woman does what they do is beyond comprehension, but we're both absolutely thrilled. Who's scribbling on their notepad during that? No. He's rubbing his hands together as he's talking. I'm very excited to announce. I'm very excited. I thought it was a reporter with a vivid,

like a sharpie. Writing notes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he's rubbing his hands together with joy. But he looked like he saw that. He was there because he's seen some stuff, right? You could tell in his voice. With the awe of what Megan went through, yeah.

And we are joined this morning by Charlie from Royal Central Magazine. Good morning, Charlie. Good morning. Is this an exciting day for you? Well, it's been a long time coming, I have to say. I've been waiting for Royal Baby Watch for the last month. And it's finally arrived. Yes, it is quite exciting

to get it done. So what's the feeling in London this morning? Well, I have to say there's a lot of excitement. At the moment, well, this morning London time, it was all politics, Brexit, the usual depressing stuff. This afternoon

Royal Baby came, everyone's happy, people's talking to each other it's quite a rarity so it's quite a good feeling at the moment so there's lots of bets placed at the bookies

what is the what is the chatter around your office like what is everyone thinking the name will be well we've just been having a discussion

actually obviously the favourite Alexander James quite traditional names but one of my colleagues actually thinks Spencer would be a good bet actually, obviously the favourite, Alexander, James, quite traditional names. But one of my colleagues actually thinks Spencer would be a good bet. It was quite high this morning in the markets, about 66 to 1.

It's gone down to about 16 to 1 now. So Spencer could be the one. Can you talk to us a bit about, so there's been a bit of criticism of Megan and the fact that she wasn't going to do, you know, the photo op that Kate Middleton did. Do you think the criticism's been a bit harsh on Megan? To be honest, yes. I mean, what other mother would have to pose for hundreds of photographers a few hours after giving birth?

She wants this to be a private occasion. This will be one of the most important moments of her life. She doesn't want photos. What's going to happen is, in a couple of days' time, probably Wednesday or Thursday, a couple of photographers, just one or two, will go to Frogmore Cottage, which is where they currently are, and they'll take some pictures.

And they'll be distributed to all the media around the world. So instead of having hundreds of photographers straight away, a couple of days later, they'll just have one or two. A home birth, how rare is that for the royal family? It's unusual. It hasn't happened for very many years. Prior to Princess Diana, home birth was quite common. The Queen gave birth at Buckingham Palace to her children.

But it was Princess Diana, really, who started the tradition of going to hospital, going to the Lindo Wing, which the Duchess of Cambridge carried on. And now Meghan seems to have gone back to the home birth trend. Is there any word... I know that Doria was by her side, her mum. Was there any word on whether her father was told?

He obviously probably wasn't there. Well, from what I understand, Thomas Markle, her father, only found out when we did. So, obviously, he found out before, Thomas Markle, her father, only found out when we did. So, what if he found out before, not much before? Right. He has reacted. He released a statement, a very toned-down statement compared to what we used to,

which basically said how proud he is and he knows that the royal baby will be an asset to Britain. So, nothing too controversial, but he does know. He's probably trying to get back in there so he can meet his grandson. Well, I don't think the baby will be called Tom. No. Well, thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us. Charlie from Royal Central Magazine. Have a wonderful day.

Thank you. No problem. Fletch Vaughan and Megan's Food Fight. The Chippies Edition. So, we've already eliminated so many delicious tasty bags of chips. We're looking for New Zealand's... And eaten so many tasty bags of chips. Yeah, we have. My chip eating level before 9am this week has been through the roof. And I've already got like one of my faves here.

I've already had a couple. No, you... We're saving because we haven't got the cavernous mouth here today. Vaughn's not here to do the sound effects. We're saving. Should save. Yeah, I've got to talk a bit more. Hang on. Okay. Just wait. Okay. I'm good. We have a

workplace sweepstake. So your workplace can have a go. You download it and basically everyone in the office, draw in a name or just pick your favourite chip. Yeah, so basically you can pick a chip and then once your chip's eliminated, you're eliminated.

You know how a sweepstake works. But it's super easy to vote for our food fight. You do it on our Instagram, FVMZM and once the chip is eliminated, it is gone. It's gone forever, ever. Who's doing chippy sound effects today in lieu of Vaughan? Shall I start with the first?

Well, I don't, yeah, I've already done my, you do the first round. So this is controversial because we're going same type of chip up against same type of chip. So today, the copper kettles, These are kettle chips going up against each other. So first of all, the kettle chip company, Honey Soy Chicken, is going up against the Copper Kettle wood-fired barbecue chip. Oh, I'd probably go that one. But I don't care about either of those chips, so I just wouldn't buy them. Like, they're just not my faves. But at a party, I'd eat them. Yeah. Like, don't get me wrong, I'd eat either of those chips, so I just wouldn't buy them. Like, they're just not my faves.

But at a party, I'd eat them. Yeah. Like, don't get me wrong. I'd eat both of those chips, but I wouldn't, like... I'd eat any chip at a party if there's nothing else. Well, I'd eat ready-soldered, but then I'd be really disappointed in whoever bought them. And then we'd have to have a dip. You can't eat ready-soldered without a dip.

So, are you going to do chip sound effects? You can do chip sound effects. Nah, because I don't even want to eat those chips. I'll do these ones. The cobber kettle battle. This is an interesting round. So Doritos, nacho cheese up against Muncho's spicy tomato. Now you'll remember that my favorite Doritos, the sweet Thai chili, they were eliminated.

Yeah. And I still love a Dorito. These are great for just eating out of the bag at parties and nachos. But. Up against mancho spicy tomatoes. Oh, I've got to vote manchos. But you can't do much with manchos. And plus, they're not really like a grown-up party chip.

It's like a kids party chip. Just in my head just then, I was imagining making nachos with manchos. No, see, they'd go soggy. They'd just go soggy and you'd just have a mess of soggy, like it'd be almost like a mushy bread sog. So not as versatile. And you would get judgment if you served them at your grown-up party. See, I reckon I could eat a whole bag of munchos,

but I don't know if I could eat a whole bag. No, I could eat a whole bag of Doritos. An extra party size bag. What a hard choice. What a hard choice. Difficult. So just before we get to those early votes, how about you bring up the early votes for these rounds?

Yesterday, we put Bluebird Salt and Vinegar against Bluebird Chicken. 69% Salt and Vinegar beating out Chicken. So goodbye, Chicken Chips. Yuck. I think that was a given. Burger Rings beat out Rations. This was a lot closer.

56, 44%. So Burger Rings and Salt and vinegar uh go through to the next round so early voting for this round of food fight i got that barbecue kettle 61 to 39 over the honey soy chicken and munchos and Doritos are 50-50. Ooh. Ooh. I reckon Doritos are going to take that out purely on versatility. And the fact that you don't get judged so much having munchos at your grown-up party.

Yeah, well, because you called me like a 14-year-old before for eating munchos, spicy tomatoes. I mean, yum, but. Watch your mouth. Yeah. Oh, that's a tough one. Vote now. Again, I shouldn't have eaten a chip just before I have to talk into the song. Thanks for that.

What a great podcast so far. Wouldn't you agree, Fletch? Yes. And it's all thanks to Spark. Get one gig of bonus data with the Spark U25 pack. Now, back to the podcast. Now, Vaughn is sick today with the man flu. So, our fact of the day, Jenga will miss the high notes that Vaughn provides.

Yeah. I don't like this because it exposes us and I have to carry you because you're not a great singer. It's just the two of us, okay? Wow. Ready? I feel like I've just spent my whole life feeling I'm a singer and Simon Cowell is just telling me I'm not. Well, me and Vaughn usually cover up what you bring to the table. Ouch. Okay, wow. Finding this out cover up what you bring to the table with us. Ouch.

Okay, wow. Finding this out today on the 7th of May, 2019. Here we go. Wow, after all this time. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. See, timing. I feel like I carried you. Timing's not your strong point.

You rushed that. Don't rush things in life, Fletch. We're here. We made it. Okay, today's fact of the day is not the one that Vaughn sent me because I didn't like it. And he's not here, so I can choose my own. Good. Today, and this is particularly interesting because if you didn't see my Instagram,

I went to Paris recently, and I got a photo with the Sky Tower. I mean, not the Sky Tower, the Eiffel Tower. Right, okay. So the Eiffel Tower is six inches taller in summer than it is in winter. It shrinks in the cold. That's a six-inch Subway sandwich. That's half a foot long. That's a lot. I like to measureinks in the cold. That's a six inch Subway sandwich. That's

half a foot long. That's a lot. I like to measure everything in Subways. Subway sandwiches. Yeah. Six inches? I'm like, okay, I know what that is. That's a Subway, half a Subway sandwich. But then, you know, sometimes they give you, I reckon, five and a half, five inches. Because someone came in

and gobbled up six, no, seven inches. Yeah. Because they cut the loaf first. Do you watch them cut it and then you can see which one's bigger and then they grab the smaller one? You're like. Yeah.

Sometimes I want to say, no, take the other half. But then I don't mind because it's carbs. They're just eyeballing that. It's carbs though, so don't worry about it. So it is six inches taller in summer than it is in winter and that's because the sun's beating down on the metal when it grows. Speaking for all guys, we've all been outside when it's winter and it's cold, and it shrinks a little.

Our Eiffel Towers shrink a little in winter. And we have read a story before about summer junk. Hey, summer junk is bigger. Just all round Everything expands in summer Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah Ayo, that's why summer flings are great

That's why, is it? Explain more Yeah, no, that's all So yeah, thermal expansion causes it to grow It's half a foot long sandwich Taller in summer than it is in winter Fact of the day Day, day, day, day It's half a foot long sandwich taller in summer than it is in winter. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Intern Anya dropping the news that she nearly got a dog at the weekend. This is what you said this morning. You came in here, guys, I actually nearly got a dog at the weekend. How do you nearly get a dog? Okay, to me, stealing is you actively go out with the intention of stealing something and then you take it, right?

Well, no, that's premeditated stealing. Not giving something back is still stealing. Like, a lot of theft is just opportunist. Like you're walking along and you see something, you're like, I want that, I'm taking it. That's also theft. I would like to rephrase this headline as, Intern Anya borrowed a dog.

If I may. So we was outside having a cup of tea. We was outside. We was outside. We was outside. Yous all know we was outside. We was on the deck. Mum, Dad, me and the boyfriend, cute as having a cuppa.

Do you always hang out with Mum and Dad? Yeah. Having a cup of tea. Yeah, my life sounds like a rock star. So we were having a cup of tea and I just said, there's a dog in the garden. Just like real cash and it didn't really sink in until this cute little puppy

came closer. Now you took photos it looks like Justin Bieber's dog it's real cute. It's identical to Justin Bieber's dog. Why couldn't you have got a cute dog like that Megan? Excuse me? Leo James is very cute. So yeah, immediately I was like, I shall call you Freddie.

Okay, so you named it. I've named the dog. You took photos with it and you named it. We did a call you Freddie. Okay, so you named it. I've named the dog. You took photos with it and you named it. We did a light photo shoot. Okay, firstly, I'd like to point out there was no collar. So immediately it's free. Renaming was the only option. Secondly, free pup is what went through my mind.

Okay. And then I decided to be responsible and went down the driveway, had a little poke around. No one was out calling a dog's name. There was actually no one on the street. And at this point, how much time had passed? Like how long have you had this dog now? Two hours.

No, like 10 minutes maybe. So I was like, yay, puppy. Played with the puppy for a little while. And I was like, okay. Couldn't hear anything. Went down the road. No one's looking. The third sign of free pup.

And then I started googling like, oh, do you think we should call someone? And then I was like, well, he was very well, like, clipped and stuff, so we didn't think he was a stray. And, you know, it kind of became clear that it was... To be fair, that kind of puppy wouldn't survive as a stray dog.

Yeah. A cat would eat it. Yes. So little. Then came the question of like, okay, well, we'll give it maybe 45 minutes and see if a neighbour pops around or then we'll call someone, maybe like the council or something. And then in that time, I got very attached to Freddie.

And we did become best friends. And there may have been a bit of a repressed memory of me as like a seven-year-old begging mum and dad for a dog. And I may have been a bit of a repressed memory of me as like a seven-year-old begging mum and dad for a dog. And I finally had convinced them to let us keep Freddie if Freddie didn't have a home. Your parents and the boyfriend, they were all on board. Yeah.

The boyfriend was so on board because we've been talking about getting a dog for ages. And mum and dad in their recently renovated house, not so on board. Yeah. But eventually came around because everyone, not so on board. Yeah. But eventually came around because everyone fell in love with Freddie. Okay. And then literally just as mum was like, oh, okay, went here. Excuse me? Has anyone seen my dog?

To which I would just be like, no, not here. But yeah, my honest boyfriend was like, yeah, he's over here. So see you, Freddie. What was the excuse? What was his actual name? I don't actually, we didn't find out. If it wasn't Freddie, like there would be no other name. He looked like a Freddie.

He pranced around like a Freddie. So yeah. But people do this with cats Because cats just love getting fed And they love just Sluzzing around the neighbourhood Yeah well I was ready to hop in the car and go to Kmart Get him a bed I said to mum I was like

I'll just pop down the road and get him some food He would have been dressed like one of those hot dog costumes That you get Within a day Within about 10 minutes But it wasn't to be So now I'm Sans dog, Sans love in my heart that you get? Yes, absolutely. Within a day? Yes. Within about 10 minutes. But it wasn't to be. So now I'm Sam's dog,

Sam's love in my heart without Freddie. And now you need a dog probably. Well, now I keep peering over the fence and I'm like, Freddie, come on. Come on over. But yeah, they're moving house soon

so I've got to say my goodbyes. It's really an emotional rollercoaster at my place at the moment, team. Isn't it? It really is. Could we take some calls? Because people do this all the time. Just start taking over someone else's pet.

Yeah, well, did you adopt the pet or did the pet adopt you? Because sometimes they just wander over to your house all the time. Cats are the worst because they want food. So they pretend they like you. You feed them and they bugger off to their other house. They do like shift work. 12 hours at yours, 12 hours at theirs. And you think you're the only one. 12 hours at yours, 12 hours at theirs, and all the time they're getting eight meals of jelly mate or biscuits.

Very cunning. That's why they're the smart ones, cats. But yeah, I don't know. Give us a call. 0800 DARS at M9696. Maybe you went further than intern Anya. Maybe you did take over someone's pet. Start feeding it.

Start feeding it. Get it out. It became yours. Terrible because then you're like, most people are like, where's my cat or my dog? I don't know. I've never seen it. And someone like Anya's stolen it. Start feeding it. Get it out. It became yours. Terrible because then you're like most people are like where's my cat or my dog? I don't know. I've never seen it. And someone like Anya's stolen it. In turn Anya stole a dog at the weekend.

Steal is a loose term. Looked after for an hour and named it and was about to go get it some food. And fell in love. And asked her parents if she could keep it. And then the owners came over. So we would like to know when you have tried to or when you did steal someone's pet.

Jamie, have you stolen someone's cat? Just like a surrogate stolen. We've been helping them out. Okay. Right, and is this a cat? Yeah, it's a ginger cat. I'm glad it's not that other lady's cat because I was feeling really bad, but it's not hers.

Okay, and so what? Do you think you had a better cat food? Well, we're not allowed cat food where we are, and we're cat lovers. And he definitely lives on our street. But he started coming over, and he's super friendly. We kind of just started to entice him in with a bit of chicken, you know, and then the kids have taken him over. And we've named him Freddy.

Sorry, not Freddy. My daughter's named him Roddy. I don't know why I think it's actually a girl. They dress him up, they play games with him, I've bought him a couple of toys. And you can't very well take it away from the kids now. No, I can't, but it's great

because we get the best of both worlds. We get to play with him and feed him and then he just kind of, you know, like you said, scuzzies around the rest of the neighbourhood but we get to play with him too. And then the actual owners, if he gets sick, have to pay for him at the vet. Yeah. And you don't.

That's right. Jamie, Jamie, thanks for your call. No worries, thank you. Nick, who stole your cat? Well, yeah, long story. So we lived about 5K from Mitre 10 in Kaikoura. Okay. And we had this cat, which was loved by the family.

I was only a little fella. I was only like eight or nine. Yeah. And Dad went into Mitre 10, and our cat had been gone for like, you know, a day, how they kind of go wandering like cats do. Yeah. And he went in there, and he's like,

man, that looks like our cat. And so our cat had kind of made itself home in Mitre 10 and kind of become their store cat but they were like oh you know you'd better you'd better take it home because you know it's your cat it's not really a yeah we're not we're not animates yeah exactly so we took it home and um had it uh upstairs to try and get you know locked locked in a room kind of thing because it kept trying to get out yeah but didn't think that it would jump out of a two-story window, which it did,

and went back to Mitre 10. And stayed there until it passed away like five or six years later. Oh my God, so it became Mitre 10's cat. Yeah, yeah. It sounds like we're terrible parents, but we weren't. We looked after it, we were loving, but apparently just liked Mitre 10 better. Maybe it's just got a thing for tradies and those shorty short

Nick thanks you call Tracy you actually did what intern on you did But did you get away with this Yeah, I did. Whoopsie. There was a dog by the front gate and it was hanging out, you know, seemed like it wanted to be friends for the day, so we brought it inside, but we'd give it a safe home for the night with a plan to take it to the pound in the morning. Of course it barked, so we brought it inside and patted it. It was kind of three kids against mum and dad and the dog stayed forever. But a couple of months into it,

some people turned up and said, oh, look, that's our dog. And so we went, okay, we'll give you a chance to prove what's its name. They went, oh, Blackie? Okay, cool, you guys call Blackie and if Blackie comes to you, then you can have your dog back,

otherwise it's ours. So, yeah. Did Blackie go to them? Blackie did not go to them. Blackie had made a very good home with us. Oh, my God. Thank you very much for the dog. Were they okay with that, to walk away?

Like, they were obviously still looking for their dog. Or do you think they... They didn't seem to care. Really? Okay. So clearly it was better off with her. The next day you just never took it to the pound or anything? Yeah.

We kind of kept it forever. Just a little bit. You don't care, Tracy. I love it. And you're owning it. It's brilliant. Thanks for your call. Oh, my God.

Lots of text messages and most of them cat related. Yeah, cats are the worst. My cat Roger went missing. Roger, I love that. With a collar and a number on the tag. Four days later, an old lady rang to ask me what I fed him. And did not give Roger back. So you're thinking, yeah, this woman was going to...

Roger must have had a little spews on the carpet because you gave him some jelly meat or something. I've got Roger. I'm not giving him back. But what does he like to eat? Lots of cats running away. There are a few dog text messages. We lost our dog for four months.

A lady took him home when he got out. She lured him with chicken. We got him back on Christmas Eve when she took him to the vets and admitted that she had actually found him. And that's the thing, like, if your pet's microchipped, as soon as you have to take that pet to a vet, they're going to scan it and realise

it's not your pet. Because cats aren't, they don't have to be microchipped, right? But they can be? You get them microchipped, right? But they can be? You get them microchipped, yeah. Oh, right. It's pretty cheap. But what is that

ethical dilemma for a vet? Like, do you have to, like, say someone brings a cat in and they're like, this is... It has to go back to the owner.

Yeah, and then it scans up and it's like, this is actually paddles and it's registered to this. Like, what do you do as a vet? Do you have to, like, ring them? Call cat protection services or something.

Call the police. Keep the hold of the cat and call the other owner while the... Oh, that would be awkward, wouldn't it? So awkward. So have we learned anything in Tadania? Yeah, be more sneaky. That was not the answer I was looking for. That's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. key. That was not the answer I was looking for.