ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - May 09 2018

Episode Date: May 8, 2018

Mellenial's are afraid of voicemails, Indie got a pair of Heelys and when did you realize you were in a serious relationship?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Sparks. Shoot incredible videos in super slow-mo with the Samsung Galaxy S9. 10 out of 10. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, good morning, welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Thank you, Anya. Let's get more details on this. I will resent you less if you give me $10,000.

Yeah, and all the rich people that are like, terrible idea, terrible idea. They're already buying their kids' love. So they don't care about the kids who don't have 10,000 pounds. Yeah. That's a great idea. That would be a disaster. Could you imagine what everybody would blow it on? Oh, yeah.

25. Yep. But if you're handing me over $10,000 you can't judge me what I spend it on she would have been a big screen TV there would have been a lot of PlayStation games

a fair amount of drinking yeah there'd be nothing I think that's it's easy to say that and that's people's main criteria of it

but apparently there would be conditions applied it's not here's 10,000 go nuts at the bar. It's kind of towards a house deposit or your superannuation. Oh, boring.

Yeah, it's boring 10,000. Boring 10,000. It's not fun, frivolent 10,000. It's like when we give away money and people are like, I'm going to save it. No! Go and blow it. Go and blow it. It's free money. Yeah. Not how people with no money tend to think about that.

True. All right, well, maybe you can be in this very predicament. We've got $200,000 with our double date coming up at 8 o'clock. That was a seamless segue. Anya, as an intern, just absolutely reeling at that seamless segue. Couldn't believe it even happened. That was beautiful. You didn't even know it had happened until I'd said,

be listening at 8 for our double date and win some cash we'll be listening yeah thank you we've got no choice we have to we have to be here we have to yeah

for sure alright you lot listen up it's story time three news headlines for three stories that I've found. Quirky, unusual, weird, unusual news stories.

Headline one. Man plays bumper cars with digger in car park. Oh, fun. Where about? Oh, no. Are you going to tell us? America. It's America.

That would be fun. Yeah. Well, you know, there's a place, I think it's in Invercargill or Southland. Yeah, Digger World. Digger World. And you just go in actual diggers in a sandpit, like real adult diggers. You should put wicked, like, old cars in there. I would just like...

I'd love to smash up some old cars. I mean, it's dangerous for the people driving the cars, but people in cars trying to take me out while I'm in the digger. That would be fun. You would claw through their car and kill them. I know, I could kill them. Maybe if they were robots, that would be great. Okay, right.

Yeah. Well, you could take a digger down the motorway and I'm sure people would be driving after you trying to stop you. Okay. I would. I'd love to see the police road spike you. I put the smooch good out of the digger. Megan said it was okay.

Megan who? Papadopoulos. That I work with. She has no say on the use of motorways and diggers and damage to thousands and millions of dollars of property. What? I've got an audio recording. Just told me to.

God, you can't trust anybody these days. No, you can't. Okay, that's headline one. Headline two. Some say Judge Vaughan Smith's sentence too harsh. I dish it out pretty harsh. Especially to other Vaughan Smiths. Some say Judge Vaughan Smith's sentence too harsh.

Especially to other Vaughan Smiths who drive diggers down motorways. Pretty unforgiving. And headline three. Prisoners overstaying jail sentence. First clue, something was up. Oh, okay. Oh, they stayed in jail. Yes.

That's nice. Someone tagged me in this story about Vaughan Smith, the judge. I don't know what he did that was too harsh, but I know he was sentencing. Well, wait. While you're digging. And do you know what?

He must be Jamaican because this was in Jamaica. Yeah. Jamaican. He might be hot. I love the thought. Hey. I love the thought that there's at least one Vaughan Smith out there with a big penis. I mean, that's just generalising Jamaicans.

But we've all seen Usain Bolt run. That is surprising he's got that much speed, carrying that much extra weight and wind resistance. But it's not racist because it's a compliment. I've Googled parish judge. He's a parish judge. The parish just means like district or county. Like they come from different parishes.

These are just all of his criminals that he's put away. Is there a picture of him? I can't seem to find a photo of him. Is he a VAUGHAN or a VAUGHN? This could be him. No, that's Shane. Is he an AN or just an N? He's an AN.

He's an AN. Yeah. That's good. Oh, is this him? I don't know. He looks very commanding. Oh. No, that's Clint Smith't know. He looks very commanding. Oh. No, that's Clint Smith Jr.

It says there on the... Right, he might be related to Vaughn Smith. That's Clint Smith Jr. Okay. Okay, well, we're not going for that one? No. We are, no? Are we going for one or three?

I want to know why they stayed in jail. Three. Okay, we go now to the Democratic Republic of Congo. Oh, Dr. Congo. Dr. Congo. Oh, yeah, Dr. Congo. That's right. For those maybe that missed that earlier show,

how many years ago? Five. Five or six years ago? We were looking at a map of Africa because Megan didn't believe that there was a country called Chad. She thought Cameroon was Cameron. And then she's like,

what the heck is Dr. Congo? Because they're right there. Democratic Republic of Congo. Yeah. Dr. Congo. Because it's quite small and you can't fit Democratic Republic of Congo. Yeah. Congo. Because it's quite small and you can't fit Democratic Republic of Congo. There's like Chad, Cameron and Dr. Congo all hanging out in Africa.

Yeah. So anyway, we go to Dr. Congo now. And prison officials were wondering what was up when people's sentences were up and they were staying in prison. Right. Now this is in a place called Osio. Osio? Osio?

Osio. Osio? Osio. Osio. Yeah. A place in the Democratic Republic of Congo. And they looked into it and prisoners were actually under the prison operating a diamond mine. They'd gone under the prison? They'd gone under the prison operating a diamond mine. They'd gone under the prison?

They'd gone under the prison. How did they know the prison was built on top of a diamond mine? I don't know, but they were extracting diamonds. And Megan, you might know about this, but some of the people that were caught, some of the prisoners testified that they found and sold diamonds of 0.1 to 0.15 grams.

So, if you were putting those on a wedding ring or an engagement ring, that's... You wouldn't. That's big. That's huge, right? Wow. How much was it? I'm going to Google that, Google image that. One to...

Well, the biggest one was 0.15 grams. Oh, 0.15. I was going to say a one-gram diamond would be significant. That's huge. So apparently they also arrested a couple of prison guards. So they were in on it. They were. I think a few of them were in on it.

Yeah. And they were all just basically splitting the profits from the diamond mine. How the heck did they know it was down there? I don't know. I don't know. Do you know some guy was trying to tunnel out of prison and he was like, there's a lot of shoddy stuff in this. Dude. Wait a minute of shiny stuff in this. Dirt?

Wait a minute. Hold on a second. Or whether or not the prison was next to a diamond mine and they were like, oh, we'll just dip down. Why do you keep saying mine? Mine, I don't know. Diamond mine. But the prison guards who were running it would have been like recruiting workers.

So they're like, what, your time's up? Do you want to come down here? Oh, you're thinking the guards. Guards were doing it all along. Yeah. That's good. That's a good... Oh, you're thinking the guards. Yeah. Guards are doing it all along. Yeah. That's good. That's a good breakdown. Mm-hmm.

Right. Keeps you busy. It does. It does. You've got to do something in prison, don't you? The devil makes work for idle hands or something. Yeah. Prison-y sounding.

Yeah. How do they make you hand over the diamond? I'd be like, oh, I found one. It's gone in my pocket. Don't tell anyone. Well, no, if you work in an actual mine, don't they like give you a frisk and a... Oh, do they? They'd never feel

that small a diamond though. Because you're on the same as you, Megan. If I worked in a mine, yeah, or just in the...

I'd swallow it and then sieve every diamond I took. Okay. I would. I would. Say it's worth, what's a diamond

worth? I don't know, $50,000. Are you kidding me? I'd sieve through your poo for that. I'd be like, Megan, open up, and then just pop a diamond and be like, I'm going to need to sift through your poo

for the next while. The Hawke's Bay District Health Board are hoping to lead the charge in opposing applications for alcohol licenses to sell booze at school functions and fundraisers where children are at all present. Okay. And this includes high school kids right up to the age of 18 where, of course, it's legal to drink.

They're worried when there's booze at fundraisers, such as they use the list, say, fundraising events, discos, jubilee celebrations, art shows, quiz nights, school camps. The school camps aren't really fundraisers. That's just the teachers getting lit in the bush. But they're saying that it's an exposure to alcohol that may lead to a greater likelihood of drinking at a younger age or drinking more hazardously because they see the parents getting lit in the bush

and they want to get lit in the bush too. But the parents and the teachers are getting lit in the bush. And they want to get lit in the bush too. But the parents and the teachers are getting lit in the bush after everybody goes to sleep. Yeah. Are they? Oh, they might get lit in the bush during orienteering. But then it becomes a real life challenge. You've got to save your parents because they're lost in the bush

and they're drunk and prone to a little hypothermia. Right. It's just a bit crazy. I thought it was because if it's at fundraisers and stuff, they can sneak a little bit. I didn't realise it was just because they're like seeing it. Oh, right. Well, that may be part of it.

That may be part of this exposure to alcohol that's likely to lead to. You see people drinking everywhere. I know. That's the thing. If your parents love to get lit in the bush or at home, you're going to see them get lit. Yeah. It's weird to think that just seeing them at school in the school hall

might make you be like, well, actually, they're doing it here now, so this is me. I want to get lit all the time. But you watch movies and you see people get drunk, you know? So how is that any different? But you don't see their nipples, which is... Booze, yes. Gun violence, yes.

Nipples, absolutely not. No. Absolutely not. It's a weird one. I've hosted a couple of quiz nights, and these are different because the kids aren't there. This is at your kid's school. This is at Indy's school now,

and even before she went to the school, I hosted a couple of quiz nights there, and they do, they get pretty boozed up, but it's good fun. It's a fundraiser. It's a fundraiser. And you need people to part with their money. You do, and apparently that's the big moneymaker.

Getting people lit. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't know. If this will work. If it will work. It'll just mean people, I mean, it'll be great for the babysitting business

because it just means people won't take their kids to the school fundraiser anymore. Yeah, true. But then are they talking like end of year school? I mean I went to a small school growing up. I don't know what your guys' primary school was like but they used to have like an end of year Christmas picnic and it was just an excuse for everyone to get

a bit boozy. No, we didn't have anything like that. It was just like a community thing and you just saw them get boozed and then you had to drive home. It was okay because there was only a couple of k's down the road. Sure, you're only nine. So you went with your parents and everything and mum and dad just had a go.

Oh, my parents, they loved a goon, but my parents aren't very big drinkers. Never really seen them booze, but some people's parents got proper shit face. But it was just like, what? Your mum's got more fun all of a sudden. Yeah, your mum's up on the adventure playground.

Oh, your mum's off the adventure playground. She got down the fast way. Oh, your mum's hurt. Oh, your mum's spilling. Oh, and she's up again. Nothing can stop her. Even that dangly arm and compound fracture. There's a new craze going around.

So there was the Tide Pod Challenge. What was after that? There was another one that kids were doing at school and they're like, please don't do this anymore. It's stupid. You'll maim yourself, kill yourself. Yeah, there was another one. I wonder how many of these

actually happened in there. Like, two. And then the newspaper are like, oh, quiet news day. Oh, this will get them going. Kids are eating laundry detergent.

How many of them? All of them. But I've got kids. I know, panic. I'm panicking. But when I was at school, I remember things that we got. There were stupid things like this.

And lots of kids were doing that. And they used to be like, we didn't need them to tell you that it was bad for you. But with lots of kids adding laundry to Tertian, it can't be that bad for you because bugger all die. Well, the new, I don't want to say craze, new challenge that has been a problem in the UK especially. They're calling it the deodorant challenge. Now, this involves spraying, I was going to say a brand, but I don't want to link any brands to this,

spraying a deodorant onto your bare skin. So people are doing it on their arms for as long as possible. Just going up close. I remember we were doing this at school. Up close, not at a distance. No, yeah, up close and it burns you because it's really cold because it's compressed. Oh, God. Is that what it is? Yeah, I remember this happening when I was at school.

It was like dickheads that did it. It was only the dum-dums. But like, what's the point? You can hold it longer than... Yeah, yeah, it's a timing thing. Who can do it the longest? Do you remember people using the lighters to make smiley face burns on their... Yes, yeah, it's a timing thing. Who can do it the longest? Do you remember people using the lighters to make smiley face burns on their... Yes. Yeah, that was

a bunch of dumb dumbs as well. I never did that either because I was smarter than that. Plus I was like, oh, oh. You'd always egg on someone else. You should totally do that. I wonder what the class dumb dumb's doing now. Eating Tide Pods.

Just chilling at home, having a bowl of Tide Pods before heading off to work. But, yeah, so this has come after a kid has got third-degree burns. So she's going to have to get skin grafts after she got it. Oh, a she-dum-dum. There's a picture. It's probably 50-cent piece, the old 50-cent piece in New Zealand. Like, it's quite big. And it probably 50 cent piece, the old 50 cent piece in New Zealand. Like it's quite big. And it's all festering and pussy.

It's actually in the exact shape of the Australian 50 cent piece. The old 10 sided thing. But yeah, it's pretty serious after she sprayed her arm with deodorant for a very long time. Yeah. The idea is you can hold it on longer than the other dum-dums. And then you're King Dum-Dum, or Queen Dum-Dum in this case. And then you're like, King Dum-Dum needs a skin

graft. Well, King Dum-Dum's got to be off school for a few days, guys, because of the dum-dum thing I did, but at least I'm the king. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Hello! Today's Top Six deals with a... Oopsie, dropped my spoon.

Oh, no. It's okay. It was clean. Today's Top six deals with... Oopsie, dropped my spoon. Today's... It's okay. It was clean. Today's top six deals with the fact that youth gangs are taken to social media to brag about their crimes. Now, these are pretty horrific crimes. Some of them involved armed hold-ups or... What about when they tagged the train? They've done that like two or three times now and they still haven't caught any of them.

Yeah, they push the emergency doors so they stay shut and then it's just stuck on the platform and then they just run in real quick and spray paint the train. But that's low end. Would you call that a victimless crime? Someone's going to clean it. The victim is the

taxpayer, I guess. But these are actual crimes where dairies are being robbed at gunpoint at knife point with weapons and they're happening quite a bit. A tax payer, I guess. But these are actual crimes where dairies are being robbed. Right. You know, at gunpoint, at knife point, with weapons. And they're happening quite a bit. And then they're putting it on Facebook. Yeah. What the hell?

They put videos on YouTube of all the money they stole and cigarettes and everything they stole. There's photos on Twitter, photos on Facebook pages. A sports store was ram rated and they put a photo of the car, which, by the way, has had the number plate pulled off. But you can identify the faces if you knew them, of these people who have stolen all the stuff. Drugs, all sorts of things. And they're bragging about it on social media.

Just leaving evidence right there. Disgusting. Now, if they're doing these robberies, they have something to brag about. Stop the robberies. Here's Vaughan Smith's top six things youth gangs should be bragging about on social media. Number six, how well their veggie gardens are going and all the produce they're getting from them. Imagine a nice photo with a bandana over your face and some lettuce and some tomatoes and saying, I just made a salad all from my garden.

Trust me, I've done that. It's a great feeling of smugness and you've achieved something. You sound like a youth pastor trying to get some kids on the straight and narrow. I know cool and cool is veggie gardens. And don't ram raid your local Palmer's Garden world. Let's just make our own compost. Compost. Compost.

Compost. Campaste. Campaste. Campaste. Campaste. Number five on the list of the top six things youth gangs should be bragging about on social media instead of armed robberies. How well are they doing with their fitness goals? Maybe before and after photos. I've come so far. And if you have to wear a bandana over your face, you can still do that. Yeah.

Because your face changes a bit, but it's all about the body results. Yeah. And how you feel on the inside. It is. Day eight of the... 12-day challenge. 12-week challenge. Oh, 12-week, yeah.

And I'm feeling great. Here's my before and afters to date. Well done. See, everyone likes that. They don't mind armed robberies. Number four on the list of the things youth gangs should be bragging about on social media, not armed robberies, when they meet a celebrity. Yeah.

Have a nice photo with a celebrity. I'm not talking about someone higher up in the gang. Yeah. We don't know who they are. Celebrity, celebrity. Yeah. Just be like, hey, I met this rugby player. He's a great guy.

Real nice. Took time out to have a photo with me and the other people with patched jackets on. Number three on the list of the top six things youth gangs should be bragging about on social media instead of armed robberies. Their upcoming travel plans. Just booked a lovely holiday to Bolivia. Bolivia. Want to pick up the drugs. Oh, probably.

Yeah. Probably. That might be a drug run. Keep that one on the downline. Yeah, probably. Yeah. Probably. That might be a drug run. Keep that one on the downline. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, if you worked hard, finally doing my Southeast Asia discovery trip. Yep. Booked a tour through Cambodia. Yep.

Can't wait to hit Copenhagen. And pick up the drugs. Yeah, again, I don't know why I'm picking a lot of spots where drugs are prevalent. Number two on the list of the things youth gangs should be bragging about on social media other than armed robberies, how cute their pets are. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I mean,

gang members not known for having the cutest dogs, I'll give you that, but they find them cute. Yep. And some people do. Although I feel like a lot of people on social media

are just like, oh, cute, when it's just some mongrel crossbred pit bull thing because they're scared of the person who posted the photo. Yeah.

Oh, it's like an ugly baby. You're like, oh, cute. You can tell in your voice you don't mean that. Yeah, yeah. It's why it's best written in a comment on a photo. And the number one thing youth gangs should be bragging about on social media other than crimes, how much they love their mum. It's Mother's Day this weekend.

I love you, mum. Love, Bulldog. Bulldog, I love you too. Thanks for the heartfelt message this week of Mother's Day. Love from Mum. P.S. Please go back to being called Christopher. We didn't call you Bulldog.

I love you. That's today's top six. FBM. Venezuela. We've just been frantically Googling things about Venezuela. Not just hot Venezuelans, but sure, that was on our Googling list. Because they're always good looking. Well, I mean, that's a gross generalisation.

But again, it's a positive one, so it's not bad. Yeah, it's not bad to say, oh, there's so many hot people in that country. But always are over-represented in Miss World. In Miss World competition. She's always my pick. It's definitely on my list of countries to visit because it's on the Caribbean. And, you know, the Colombian areas that are on the Caribbean are beautiful

beaches. And, you know, just off the coast of Venezuela, you've got like Barbados and like all the Caribbean islands and stuff. And they're remarkably close, aren't they? Yeah, they are. Very close. But yet, that close is a huge difference. Well, the thing is, people get kidnapped. Like, if you even look like, they'll just call you a gringo and ask for money and you're gone.

Yeah, exactly. Take you to an ATM. Oh my God. It's really dangerous. A lot of violent crime. So, TravelSafe, the government website that you can register where you travel and you can see where's good to go, that kind of thing. Right. It's a high risk. And everywhere in Venezuela,

apart from the borders with Colombia, which are extreme risk. And if you've got travel insurance, most travel insurance will not be valid if there are any warnings in high risk areas. You won't be covered for your travel insurance. So you're on your own. They're just in financial dire straits.

They've got a whole lot of trade sanctions against them. They're in big trouble. You said gringo, because I hear that on Narcos. What does that mean? They call like Americans, white foreigners. So if someone's like,

hey, gringo, I'll be like, thank you. It's a bad thing. It's not always a good thing. No, not always. Well, we talked about ages on the show, how hard it was to get US dollars in Venezuela

and how much it was worth there. They've actually stopped. You had to go to the black market, which has increased the value yet again. They're trying to get involved in a national cryptocurrency because their version of the dollar, the Bolivia, is just worth nothing. And it's hard even to get rid of it. So they've tried their hand at a national cryptocurrency, which is like Bitcoin for Venezuela.

That's going not great, but better than what they had. And apparently Venezuelans have just taken to bartering. So there's not actually, and that's hard to get the tax off. So the government can't get taxed. Apparently they're corrupt. But so rather than me saying, how about you pay me, you give me vegetables and I'll do that. The old school bartering system.

Old school village to village bartering system. I'll give you this goat and you give me that. What I need. And the doctor might be like, I'll give you a check up. A prostate check. That's for free. Wink. Okay.

Wait, wait. For the pleasure of it. Whereabouts is this doctor's surgery? Oh, in the back of a van. Okay. I don't want anything from the doctor's free. Yeah, if the doctor's giving it to you for free and winking, it's when your health insurance doesn't cover it.

Yeah. You need a new doctor. Well, the latest thing to be worth more than the Venezuelan Bolivia is virtual World of Warcraft currency. World of Warcraft online game. Like an online game currency? Wizards, soldiers, yeah. I've never played World of Warcraft, but what's the deal?

You get money. So the deal is you do tasks, you can get gold, you can purchase the gold to buy things in game. You can buy cute outfits and stuff. Yeah, totally cute outfits. The female characters wear cute bikinis which have some sort of arrow repellent properties whereas the males have to wear huge, thick, leathery armour

to have the same. Don't ask why, that's just how these games work. So, yeah, the World of Warcraft virtual gold. Last August, it was a bit of a big deal because it was worth twice as much as the Venezuelan currency. Right. Now it's worth seven times as much. Oh, my God. And it's not skyrocketed.

That's how badly the Venezuelan Boliviar is doing. So you would have to find another nerd that played this game. Yeah. And then, so say, for example, you had food that I wanted. Yep. Are we doing World of Warcraft to actual Venezuelan people to trade? Yeah.

Is this what they're doing it as? Is this what they're using it for? No, no, no. They're just saying that you used to be able to dollar for dollar get more, but now it's worth so little that it's worth less than a virtual currency. On Warcraft,

could you give your money to someone else? Like, have you bought a hundred bucks? You can, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you could literally be like, I'll give you a hundred dollars on Warcraft for like some veggies. You could, yeah. No reason why not. That's so weird. I know, and it's worth more

than their local currency. Oh, that's sad. The virtual currency of World of Warcraft. More than an actual currency that a country trades on. That's insane. That's sad. I really hope it all gets sorted out. I don't know how it will, but I hope it does. Because they're hot people.

I hate to see hot people suffering. Is this why we're so upset? There's other countries in the world going through some terrible stuff. But they're not as hot. Are they as hot as we are? And maybe we shouldn't be worried about them because hot people always... They always coast through. They do.

They get through life okay. They'll be alright. Fletch. Vaughn. And Megan through life okay. I'll be right. Fletch. Vaughn. And Megan. The Podcast. Sam. Yesterday, there was a package for Indy on the table when I got home.

I said, what's this? And shut up. My wife said, oh, that's from mum, her mum. They're a set of Heelys for Indy. Oh, no. And just to bring you up to speed, Heelys are a sneaker with a wheel on the back. Wheel in the heel. A wheel in the heel, Heelys. I remember

what, 2000s these were in? I know. All the rage. The back. Indy's told me heaps of her friends at school have got them. The Heelys, and she didn't have Heelys so she, actually I felt really sorry for her because she was telling me she's in charge of telling them where they have to go on the Heelys for Heely races.

Right. So she like adjudicates because she doesn't have any Heelys. And I was like, oh, but at the same time, yay, because you're not got a broken arm. So I was okay with her being Heely-less. Okay. But yesterday she acquired some Heelys. Mother-in-law sent her some Heelys. Kind gift.

Why didn't you just chuck them in the bin like was there did that thought cross your mind well no we've got Heely rules yep she goes

so she's like I want to do Heelys I said you got some stuff to do first so I was like homework this that and the other and then I took her up

to the school because we live close and there's nice flat bits of smooth concrete there and we had some Heely practice hard

oh yeah way harder than roller skates because than roller skates because on roller skates at least you can stand flat footed yeah and you kind of

learn to but then there's the balance and being on wheels with the Healey it's a skill so we googled we YouTubed a Healey

tutorial which I'm imagining is what all the cool kids do yeah when they want to learn anything and had some but

I was holding her arm otherwise she would have some, but I was holding her arm. Otherwise she would have fallen off. Like I was holding her hands and her weight. You're crazy. So she was getting used to it. Yeah. And then we got home.

She's like, can I take the helis to school tomorrow? I was like, we need to practice more before you take them to school. Okay. Because you know how close you would have fallen over

if dad wasn't there, you would have fallen in. You know, we're going away in the next holidays. I really don't want you to have a broken arm. Dad's just being just a little bit selfish.

Dad's being a wild, cautious I think Dad said. I would have hidden the shoes until after you came back from holiday. After the holiday. So caring. And when we were actually up at the school, a lady said, oh, you want to be careful on those?

Which is always what you want to hear because you're about to hear how their kid broke their arm. Except it wasn't. She said, I wore my teenager's ones and I fell and broke my wrist. And I was like... Like a snowboarding accident. Yeah.

That's the thing. You fall and you put your hands down. And she said she was wearing her teenager's hairies, which I didn't know they came in teenage sizes. And she said she broke her wrist. And I was like, ooh, okay. I guess that's kept you off the Heelys. She's like, yeah, that's why I don't play on kids. She was an adult.

She would have fell hard. You'd fall hard when you were an adult. There's a bit more of you to fall. And I thought that, you know, I've seen a parent absolutely eat it on one of those little razor scooters. Is that what they call them? Those little zip scooters? Little kids, tiny little scooters

with the tiny little rollerblade wheels on them. Do you know, being a city dweller, so many suits have razor scooters and go to work on scooters. And they fold them up and put them under their desk. Who hates them? I'm not a huge fan. Is it Caitlin that's got an absolute hatred

of adults on razor scooters? Like, grow up. I know. I'm sorry. You're so embarrassed. I'm embarrassed for you if you're riding one of those. No, they have electric ones now. I see them all the time.

It's even worse. Get a bike. Those would be fun. What do they do when they get to work? Just, like, fold it up and put it under the desk. Yeah. They recharge it. And then they change their shoes into a formal, formal shoe.

No. And no one's got any idea they're a rebel with a cause on the way to work. You're like dating this guy and then you stay over on a Sunday night and he's like, oh, I'm off to work. And then you see him belt out the right. I'll be like, oh. See ya. Never again.

Bye. So you break up with someone. Oh, 100%. A couple of months in, it's going well. It's me or the scooter. You're like, I'm ready to tell him I love him. You're just about to be like, I've got something I want to say. And he's like, hold on a minute, dude.

I've just got to change my razor scooter wheel because it's getting a bit worn down. Would you renege on the L word and break up with him? I'd be so disappointed that I didn't see any clues before that because you're a different person if you're riding a scooter

like you've got like something else going on because the ones you see running around the city with adults on them they're like

probably four adults because they've got a bigger wheel they're probably commuter zip scooters they're huge yeah yeah way different

and some of them are a bit fatter because they've got a battery obviously and a motor in them yeah oh my god that's so uncool.

I'm just thinking of getting beggars can't be choosers, Caitlin. But, nah. Would not do it. How old would you have to be before you accepted a man on a race scooter? Like, 92. 92? You'd have to be 92 years old and single. What if it was Ryan Gosling on a scooter?

Oh, God. that's hard. That's really made him unattractive, even just saying it. It really has. Oh, come on, you're single, Caitlin. I'll give you till end of July. To Guy the Gosling. Yeah, you'll be like, guys, I'm 28, I'm not married, I'm willing to accept guys who ride scooters to work.

To their professional, well-paying jobs. But maybe you're just worried because scooters are an accident waiting to happen. Well, I've seen people hit the curb and just, boof, adults just whack straight on the ground. Yeah, hit a stone straight down. I myself have injured myself on the skateboard, which some would say is a younger man's game. Yep. I can't be told. No, do what you want.

I do what I want in my 30s on a skateboard. But I'd love to know from you listening this morning, you can text 9696 or call us 0800 dial ZM. When you injured yourself on what is kind of a kid's toy? It could be trampolines. Trampolines. Oh, yeah, they get you. When you get older, you do.

You can't tramp like you used to. Well, maybe as a kid you just always skated or you always did this kind of thing or used this toy and then got back into it. Got you trying to pick it up when you're older. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it led to injury. Smash yourself in the face with a yo-yo because you were great when you were 13,

but at 24, you've just forgotten how to do the thread. Walk the dog. Walk the dog. The yo-yo. I just did a hand motion in studios. Pretty sure how they did it. I don't know how yo-yos work. All right, when did you hurt yourself with a kid's toy?

0800-DARLES-AT-HEM-9696. So, Vaughn, your daughter now has wheelies. Yep, wheelies. Incident is imminent. Are they wheelies or heelies? Heelies, right? Heelies. What are wheelies?

Oh, no, there's probably both. It's weird. Go up on the back wheelie and motorbike. Again, dangerous's probably both. It's weird. It's weird. You need to go up on the back wheelie a motorbike. Again, dangerous. Very dangerous. We want to know when you've hurt yourself as an adult on a kid's toy. Yeah. Because you ran into a woman who...

A woman who said, don't try on those Heelys, which isn't a problem because I can't fit my six-year-old daughter's shoes. Yeah. But she'd tried on her teenager's shoes, Heelys, and fallen over and broke her wrist. So we want to know from you when using a kid's toy has led to severe injury. Somebody said, do you guys remember elastics? I do. Explain those.

It's where if you had siblings, they'd do it but if you're an only child, you'd have to do it between the chairs in the kitchen. Oh, that's right. Mum, just stand there. You just have to stand there. I'm busy. I've got to cook dinner. Put it between the kitchen chairs. I wish I'd had siblings. And you were like.

Oh, that's right. Hands easy out, see his bloody upside down. Jump the gate. Two, four, six, eight. No. Puppy dog's tails. Anyway, you jump over the elastics.

And you'd always have to like flick your leg up and you didn't touch the elastics. That was the idea of it. And then you do that and you go to a step higher. So great as an 11-year-old, but as an adult? Somebody said I use elastics that was the idea of it and then you do that and you go to a step higher so great as an 11 year old but as an adult somebody said I use elastics

as an adult and the next day I couldn't walk my knees were absolutely buggered would it be like doing a lunge a step class at the gym

except with extreme impact every time you hit the ground if you hadn't done any physical exercise you would be sore you'd be absolutely toast somebody text messaged in my uncle who's over 40 has a Razor scooter.

It's because parking at his work is very expensive. So he's found a free all-day park. He parks there, opens up the boot, gets out his little scoots, and then scoots the rest of the way to work so he doesn't have to pay for parking. That's a side topic. Who would ever have a Razor scooter?

That one. Chris, good morning. Yeah, morning, fellas. When did you injure ever have a Razor scooter? That one. Chris, good morning. Yeah, morning, fellas. When did you injure yourself with a kid's toy? Oh, mate, I was in Whangamata about five years ago. I was 45. My son would have been about 10 or 11. Bought himself a new skateboard,

and he's having a crack at the Whangamata Skate Park. He's a bit of a wussy. He's going having a crack, and I said, Son, give it here look this is this is how we did it in the 80s brother okay okay so i was pretty confident i was a bit of a skateboarder back in the day yeah we went to drop in and just lost it completely wait chris you hadn't skated in since the 80s ands? And you're like, I'm dropping out. Hey, I was a pretty talented fella back then. You remember Tic Tacs?

You know what that is? Yeah. Side to side, you power it along. Yeah, but come on, Chris. That was the 80s. That was 30-odd years ago at this stage. Hey, anyway, stuffed it up completely, put one foot down with a straight knee,

broke the ankle. Oh! And I tried to shuffle along like, nah, I'm all right. Nah, I'm all good. Nah, I'm all good. And shuffled on and limped home. Yeah, went to the doctor. That's broken, brother.

Oh, dude. Oh, Chris, thanks for your call, mate. Rebecca, when did you injure yourself with a kid's toy? So I went on a bouncy castle when I was a teenager and I broke my ankle. The lady sent me up the slide the wrong way and then I came down where the rope handles are and my foot got caught and just, like, broke my ankle.

We're laughing with you, Rebecca. We're laughing with you. Wow. Okay. Remember we got a bouncy fun castle at your house once for us? My stag do. Very, they're very, as an adult. Lots of fun.

There was bearsies and a bouncy castle. I'm very surprised no one was killed. Very, they're very, as an adult. Lots of fun. There was bearsies and a bouncy castle. I'm very surprised no one was killed. Thanks, Rebecca. Some text messages. I was attempting the monkey bars when I visited my old primary school. Oh, no. Here's the thing about monkey bars.

When you're a kid, even I was like a tubby little kid. But you still don't have a lot of weight. Exactly. But as an adult, different kettle of fish. Gravity. Gravity. Don't jump into monkey bars take it from someone

who has someone who ended up on their back winded in some bark it's degrading but that's the least of your issues you could really

really hurt yourself somebody said everyone was trying these hoverboard things you know you lean forward these are really difficult segway sort of vibes

I stepped on and just leaned forward and just went full noise into a wall, straight through the wall, smashed the wall completely. Yeah. Somebody said, my husband drives a push scooter to work every day, and when it rains, he puts on his bright yellow plastic raincoat. Oh, no. And I said, please don't ever make yourself identifiable

because it's a little bit embarrassing. And secretly I was hoping there would be an accident so he wouldn't be able to ride it to work anymore. There was an accident. He hurt himself quite badly. But the one positive is he doesn't ride his push scooter to work anymore. That's for the best, isn't it? It's kind of like, oh, my God, are you okay?

Yes. Jemaya, when did you hurt yourself as an adult on a kid's toy? I went to Inflatable World, and it's pretty much like giant bouncy castles in a big room. It sounds like heaven. Yeah, it was awesome. Yeah. There was a whole bunch of kids,

and they said, hey, jump on this horizontal bungee. So it's basically like a bungee cord around your waist, and you run out forwards, and then it pulls you back when you get too far at the end. Yeah. And we thought it would be really cool if I jumped up into the air when I got to the end. No.

Jamaya, the exact wrong time to be airborne. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So I ended up with a whiplash in my neck and a pretty nasty concussion in the hospital for a day and three days off work. I hope when you planned to jump up in the air, one of your friends was filming that. No, luckily they weren't.

Oh, they missed out. That could have been a million plus views on YouTube. Jemaya, thanks for your call. Somebody else said, I was playing on a tramp, bouncing as high as I could, preparing for my big trick on my last jump I felt my back go And I was airborne going

Oh god And I just came down sideways And banged my head On the side of the tramp So That's another thing I hadn't thought about The impact on the back

Okay And it's not just Physical outdoor toys My husband was playing In the bath With a motorized submarine. Where's this going? He thought it was wasted on the kids because they didn't have a nautical brain. So the motorized submarine was buzzing around the bath.

It went in between his legs and the propeller got wound around his pubes. And it started tugging on the pubes. He stood up to get it off and the motor then hit the penis. At least stay in the water where there's a bit of resistance. Whacked the penis.

You come out and the propeller's like... It's going to chuck the pubes off. Anyway, it was so badly tangled in the pubes that I had to cut it out And the submarine was unfixable due to Pube entanglement Much like seaweed You've got to clear your engines

No words on if there were any barnacles Growing on the bottom of the Situation There is something that is killing Our sex lives apparently Worldwide. This is serious. So instead of Netflixing and chilling.

You've got your serious voice on. We're actually Netflixing and chilling. Like, not doing the stuff. It's because it's quality programming. Yeah, don't. Stop it. God, it annoys me when we're watching something and my wife's on her phone. I'm like, are you watching?

If she was trying to get up on it, I'd say, excuse me, you watching? No, I wouldn't. I'd be like, pause. What's happening? Okay, board. You knew this day would come. Don't panic. Don't panic.

Play it cool. Go through what we practiced. Hey, baby. Oh, that's not how I practice at all. You're practicing by yourself. You're so lucky. I run myself. You know, it's like having an emergency plan,

like a fire escape and stuff. If it's going to go down, you don't want to panic. You want to have a plan. And you can always come back to Netflix. 100%. You're not going to come back to Nookie on the couch. So, back in the day, before Netflix. I can't speak for everybody, but most married couples.

TV had like peak times. So what was peak time? Like 7 till 9.30 or something like that. Right. So all the awesome primetime programs would end at like 9.30, 10.30. Yep. And then people go to bed. Yep.

And then they like get frisky. But now, because Netflix, you can have it at any time you want, people are going to bed and watching Netflix until late at night. And then they're too tired. And not getting frisky. Going to bed at midnight or 11pm. And because, well, that's the thing. You could get to 10 and you're like, well, we could do one more episode.

And then it's 11. And then you're like, well, we could do one more episode. And then it's 11. And then you're like, oh, we're too tired now. Yeah. Yeah, we could do one more episode or we could do it. And I really need to know what happens to 11 and that gang of teenage boys. Right. Yeah, so we need to be, like, saying, okay, so Netflix off at nine o'clock and go to bed. Right.

Yeah. And I guess lots of people have Netflix in the bedroom too. We have Netflix but not normal TV in the bedroom. Well, you can use a laptop, phone. Yeah. Yeah. And so it's hindering. But that's okay.

Less babies, right? We don't need more children in the world. Oh, so now Netflix is to blame for less babies. Yeah. But that's okay. Less babies, right? We don't need more children. Oh, so now Netflix is to blame for less babies. Yeah. But that's okay. We've got a huge population in the world. We do have a population problem. Yeah.

Oh, well. It's good that it's Netflix's problem. And it's good that we're just blaming everything else. Netflix and actually just chilling. Classic humanity. Just being like, well, there's a problem, but it's not my fault. It's obviously Netflix's fault. Or and actually just chilling. Classic humanity. Just being like, well, there's a problem, but it's not my fault.

It's obviously Netflix's fault or the internet's fault. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan's Food Fights. The Kiwi Treat Edition. Well, well, well. Let's go over the results from yesterday first before I tell you the rounds

you can vote on today for our food fight where we're trying to find everybody's favourite Kiwi treat. Yesterday saw the party favourites go up against each other, the chips in a Kiwi dip and the garlic bread. Oh, faced off. This was tough.

I was kind of backing garlic bread to go all the way. Same, but it hasn't, has it? It hasn't, no. It lost. It went all the way. It came close, only 10%. 60% to the Kiwi Chips and Dip and 40% to Garlic Bread. So Garlic Bread's out of the competition now. Goodbye.

Goodbye, sweet. Farewell, Garlic Bread. Delicious Garlic Bread. But Chips and Kiwi Dip through to the next round. And in the sweet round yesterday, Chocolate Fish versus the Fruit Bursts. Yeah, it wasn't a good day for me yesterday, was it? Because I wanted the Chocolate Fish to win. And it did not.

44% to the Chocolate Fish, 56% to the Fruit Bursts. I guess you just get more of a bag. And variety. Variety. That's the key. So those were yesterday's vote-upons. We've got some more rounds starting right now at our Instagram account. FVMZM is what we are on Instagram.

Go along and vote in today's. The crunchy, the delicious chocolate-encased hokey pokey bar. Where, as a kid, I would eat the sides off. Yeah. And then the thick top and then the rest. I would suck on the hokey pokey and it would go real soft and melt into your mouth.

Okay. Versus the peanut slab. Chocolate encasing peanuts versus chocolate encasing hokey pokey. Love a peanut slab. Not as good as a crunchy slab. Love a peanut slab.

I get real jazzed. Not as good as a crunchy, though. See, to me, they're different wants and different requirements. If you feel like a lot of chocolate, your peanut slab's your answer. But if you just want something

stuck in your teeth, it's a bit of a pain in the butt to get out of it, then the crunchy's the option. But the peanut slab could kill you if you've got a peanut allergy. That's very true. Those who go through anaphylactic shock

on eating peanuts would be anti-peanut slab. But then if you were going hiking or tramping, you'd take a peanut slab over a crunchy. You would. Although a crunchy is lighter. But you can stack them. They take up less room.

I just get real jazzed when you vote on these and you're in the majority. You're like, yes, everyone's with me. I've picked where the majority are going. Well, that's round one that you can go along and vote for. And today in the next category, Raro taking on Shapes. Now, this can be whatever shapes you want. Whatever flavoured shapes you're after.

It's just shapes. Early voting, crunchy ahead of peanut slab only by 3%. So that's close. That's close. And the peanut slabbers could swing that yet. I hope not. However, Raro versus Shapes. Raro's getting hammered.

Shapes at 72%, Raro at 28%. We've got a couple more rounds to announce next hour, but if you want to head along and vote on those ones in the meantime, FEMZM on our Instagram account. FEM. So millennials, there's something that's causing them a lot of anxiety and stress, apparently. It is the voicemail.

So, like, not anxiety or stress, just they don't like this. No, anxiety and stress. Not anxiety, no. Some are so scared by the thought of listening to them that they have heaps of untouched voicemails. No, I don't like these stories because it makes millennials seem like real weak when you chuck anxiety or stress into it. I don't listen to them, though.

Like, if I get an unknown number call me, I'm like, I'm not answering that. And then they leave me a voicemail. I'm like, I'm not listening to that. I don't know what that is. If I ignore it. Don't you want to know what it is, though? No, I do not want to know. Oh, if it's unknown, I always got to have a listen.

It's bad. But if it's someone I know, I'm like, well, my voicemail literally says, please don't leave voicemail. This is why you're picking up all of these spam calls. Oh, yeah, because I don't know the number and I've gots to know. Does your voicemail say don't leave a message? Yeah. Because I thought about changing mine to that, but I thought it's a bit unprofessional of someone like important calls. No, it's like, oh, look, I very rarely check this.

Just don't leave a message. Just hang up before it beeps and message me some other way or try again soon. So apparently you can turn off voicemail. So it just hangs up. It rings, rings, rings, rings, hangs up. We need to do that. I didn't know you could do that. Yeah.

Oh, I'm going to do that then. This was on Twitter. Someone said, I vote to ban voicemails. It was retweeted so many times. And in the end, someone was like, you know that you can just turn them off on your phone. Right. And it's kind of sparked this whole discussion about voicemail. Yeah.

And people revealing that they do get quite anxious about it. But I think that all of us. They get anxious about voicemails. I do. I don't want to hear it. There's a lot of things in the world to be anxious about. And I don't, you know, take anxiety lightly. But getting worried about someone leaving a recorded message for you surely is not enough to get anxious about.

Yesterday I got left a voicemail. Yeah. And I plucked up the, it was from an unknown number. I plucked up the courage. And I had seven voicemails on there. I was like, oh, some of those I should have listened to a while ago. Oh, that's the worst. And it's like, this message received January 23rd, 2015.

You're like, oh my God. Yeah. But most of them are from my parents. And I don't know how to say to them, don't leave me voicemails. That's the thing. If that's that important, they'll call again. Or text you and be like, I need to talk to you right now. But then even texting, no one's texting.

Then group message me or message me on Facebook. My mum's not on Facebook, so she can't do that. I love chucking a curly one in and sending someone to text every now and then. Because it does it. You're like, why have they texted me and not the usual forms of communication? Even phone calls. Like, if you call me, Vaughn,

I know it's a good juicy goss. Vaughn's got goss. And if I call you, what is it? Oh, something's dead. Something's very wrong. Something's very wrong. If Megan calls, you're like, oh no, this is Andrew calling us off Megan's phone

to tell us Megan's dead. Yep. Yeah, I don't call anyone. Because we will try to call you and you just don't answer. Yeah, don't call me. Because you leave your phone in your lady purse. I don't answer phone calls so people learn not to call me. Don't call me. You're training them.

You're training them. I'm training them. You should reward them with a biscuit every time they don't call you. How do we feel about voicemail and the producers both? I... This is going to sound really bad. Okay. But I'll just be honest. Okay.

I would rather a person leave a voice message than have a conversation with them sometimes. So you're the opposite. Because then I can text them back. Right. So you take control of how this is going to be. I do like to pick up the phone and talk to my friends. But if it's like work stuff and I'm just like,

I'm trying to have an app or something, I'd rather they leave a voice message and then I can text them that. No, but then you have to go onto it and listen to it. But I don't know why I find that so awful. But then Caitlin does deal with a lot of the show stuff. Yeah, I think I'm a little bit different with that. Oh, I couldn't handle that. Anya, how do we feel?

I'm okay with receiving them. I just hate doing them. I feel like such a loser being like, hello, it's Anna. Please give me a call back. I just don't like it. I never leave them. As a millennial, you shouldn't be leaving voicemail messages.

You should know that those are not done anymore. We don't do those. I panic. I'm like, I'm hanging up. I'm hanging up. I not done anymore. We don't do those. I panic. I'm like, I'm hanging up. I'm hanging up. I'm trying to hang up. I'm trying to hang up. So if you ever get a voicemail from me,

it'll just be me trying to hang up. Yeah, James? I don't even think I've set mine up yet. I think I've probably had my phone for about a year and a half and when I go to listen to it, they're like, it's time to set up your voicemail.

Please use a pin. And I'm like, oh, no, no, no. I'll just turn that off and put it back. No, no, no, no. You're asking. I think there's a few in there, but I haven't even set it up yet. I just can't go through those stages. It's a waste of time, use a pin. And I'm like, oh, no, no, no. I just turn that off and put it back. No, no, no, no, you're asking. So I think there's a few in there, but I haven't even set it up yet. I just can't go through those stages. It's a waste of time, though.

Yeah. So somebody messaged in saying they work for Spark, and the amount of people that come in daily to get their voicemails removed is insane. And it's not just young people. What do you mean? Like, taken off? Well, old people don't know how to ring up and disable it or get rid of it.

Right. So they go into the store to get it done. Oh, so they don't want it set up in the first place at all. Right. Because apparently lately spam call, a lot of people saying spam callers leave. Messages. Leave voicemail. Yeah.

That was my one yesterday that I finally checked. It was just someone talking to me in a foreign language. And I was like, well, that was a waste. This is why I don't do it. This is why I do not do it. Yeah, it's just outdated technology. It'd be like saying, yeah,

typewriters make millennials anxious. You tell me I have to push that thing back? What happens if I make a typo? Where does the red squiggly line come up? How do I go back space? Oh no. Yuck. So,

just, yeah, get rid of it. I don't know. Get rid of it. Also, I just found this out from my mum the other day. Sorry. It's getting hot. Hi, I'm here.

It's really hot there, Caitlin. So we're very lucky here at NZMakers. We have work phones. But apparently you have to pay to listen to your voice messages. It costs like 20 cents or something. It does. I know. Absolutely not.

I know. Don't leave them. Yeah. Let's all pinky promise. I'm shooketh of that too. We're not leaving voicemails anymore. 20 cents? Or something ridiculous. Isn't it funny that 20 cents is outrageous?

Well, for something this dumb it is. I'll go out for breakfast and drop, you know, 17 bucks on an egg on some toast with a little bit of bacon. I'm not paying 20 cents. Never. Ever. To access voicemail. So I think we can all agree, don't leave voicemail.

No one's checking it. Intern Anya came to us with a big question yesterday. Oh, life advice. Yeah. Like, she looks up to us. No, well, not you. Basically just Megan and myself, given that you've never been in this situation. Would be handy to her.

I would never get in this situation. You wouldn't. You wouldn't let it get that far. No way. And even if it did get that far where other people would think it would be a good idea, I just still don't think

you would be. Oh, that's sad. You've got to let people in. Never trust anyone ever. He is a closed-door financialist. Trust anyone ever, Megan. Life motto. Because what was your question

yesterday to us, Anya? How soon is Toe soon to get big kids bank accounts, a joint bank account or like a shared account? You know why? Because young millennials going on more holidays than ever before. Yeah. What are you going to open up a joint account and start chipping in for?

Well, yeah, because we live together. So it would make life a lot easier in that respect. And also we're planning a trip to Canada. Canada! Well you spend so much money. You ever go, and all the shopping. Like I have to choose between holiday or shopping.

Yeah but I live with mum and dad. Oh yeah true, there's a lot of free money when you live with mum and dad. Are they not charging you rent? Yeah I pay like a little bit. How much is rent? A bit of a token gesture. 140, I think. For both of you. 1980s rates.

H. Oh, wow. Okay, that's quite... Yeah, and then the rest of it, I invest in shopping. That's not investing, Anya. Okay, we'll leave that. That's another issue aside.

So you want to know if it's too soon to get a joint bank account. This is when you both have authority on the account. It's too soon. How long have you been together? Two years. And you live together?

Don't do it. Don't do it. I don't think that's too soon. Do you not trust each other to individually save? Oh, no, totally we do. It's just more of a hassle. Like we're having to, you know, if we pay for a holiday or whatever, one person pays for it, the other person transfers. It's just more of a hassle. If we pay for a holiday or whatever, one person pays for it, the other person transfers.

It's just like a lot of admin. So I just didn't know if it was a real big adult move or if it's just like the next dib. I would say no. When did you get a joint bank account? Like two and a half months ago. When you got married? Yeah.

Worst decision ever. What about saving for the wedding? I guess we just saved each and then put in money for different things. Yeah. Well, because we knew we were going to get married. But the problem I have with the joint bank account is that like... You get in trouble, don't you? He goes back and looks at what we're spending money on.

And he's got this app now that calculates everything. And he's like, oh, okay, so shopping's up a bit at the moment. I'm like, oh. Oh, shopping's up on last month. You know what? You should ask payroll.

Go and see the ladies in payroll and ask if you can have your pay split and then you get some put into a secret bank account. What, you're going to go home and be like, I've cut my pay in half

but I'll save the job. I do it for the love of it. And then get it into a secret bank account and that's your runaway fund, your exit fund. And if you get any extra little jobs that you get paid for, he's like, oh, what's this?

You're like, nothing. Look away, look away. Oh, you definitely need to get it. So don't do it, Anya. Treat yourself. You're married. This is what you have to do now, Megan. Anya's two years in.

It's a young relationship. Who knows where this will go? Just don't do it unless you have to do now, Megan. Anya's two years in. It's a young relationship. Who knows where this will go? Just don't do it unless you have to. But what other signs have you had that you're in a relationship? Because I think joint bank accounts are a couple of steps in. We cohabitated. This is my personal situation. Actually, we owned a cat together before we lived together.

Oh, that's a big call. Yeah, big call, right? Looking back on it, that was pretty crazy. You've got a joint life that you're responsible for. Yeah. A life that you're jointly responsible for. Yeah, before we lived together, lived in her house. I stayed there a lot but I lived in her house and then I moved in.

Then we definitely got a joint bank account before we got married and then like proper proper joint bank accounts when we bought a house and stuff but yeah, well I think it was three or so years in we maybe got a joint bank account. Okay. Or a bank account that we could both see and put money into and stuff. That is a serious relationship. What about your first marriage?

When did you get a joint bank account then, Megan? After we got married. Okay. Gosh, you were holding up the outer marker right till it was signed on the dotted line. It was like last resort. And only when they make me do it. You've actually got a ring on your finger and you're like, okay. If I have to.

If I have to, I suppose. Could we talk about those little signs that you knew it was serious in a relationship when? Yeah. Like when you got a cat or when you got a joint bank account. That was like the, okay, this is a serious relationship. Yeah, and maybe it was a bit of a surprise when someone was like, maybe we should get a joint bank account. You're like, whoa, I didn't, whoa, hold on, I didn't know we were getting that serious. Well, maybe

I'll put you on the insurance of my car. That's a big one. Oh, that is a big step. Have you done that? No. Well, I don't have a car, Megan. And plus, under 25s really boost your premiums. Sick burn. Zing. Whack.

Crack. Let alone if they're under 20. What's he doing? This wasn't about me. This is about our insurance. I'd like to put, let's just say, unnamed under 20-year-olds on my insurance. I don't even have a car. I've got a bicycle. On my bicycle insurance.

They're like, oh, we don't tend to worry about that because kids are better at riding bikes than men of your age. Oh. Okay. Hey, look, let's just wipe that I called today because I've embarrassed myself on multiple levels. We'll talk to you later. Bye. Okay, bye.

Unbelievable sick bird. Unbelievable. I mean, it would be beneficial for them to put you on their insurance because now they've got an over-30s driver. You could be a primary driver. No, you drive because if we crash. Let's get back on track. Oh, no, I'm having fun playing in the muck over here.

No, yeah, so 9696 is a text number. You can call us 0800-DOLL-ZM. What were the signs that you were in a serious relationship? Yeah, the big step. Yeah, not the, you know, are we boyfriend or girlfriend? And not the do you want to marry me's, but the other steps along the way that indicate this is serious. I'm in a serious relationship.

We're talking about what were the signs that you were in a serious relationship? Yeah, maybe that one moment where you're like, okay, this is serious. Like in Ternania, getting a joint bank account with the boyfriend. That's like growing up stuff. And it's not your traditional landmarks of

engagement and moving in together. We want to know what were those other little steps along the way. Well, your Anakin, your cat, still alive? Still alive. Getting better, actually. He's just chilled. He's a chilled cat. But that was kind of a moment you were like, whoa, okay. Yeah, it's serious.

We own a cat together. Because that was like two, three months in? Oh, that was a bit more than that. Five? It's still going soon. That's full on for five months. I know, and I would say to people, that's too soon. That's silly.

Don't rush into that. But like, I was a four with a solid nine. So you just go along with it. You just do silly things. You just do what you're told. You were at least a five. You were, oh my God. Don't be awful.

Oh no, it was like a. You were at least a five. You were, oh my God. Don't be awful. Oh no, it was like a four, maybe moved to a five by the time the cat was purchased. Gemma, what was that little moment where you realised this is a serious relationship? Probably similar to Anya in that we got a joint bank account about five months in. Wow. Wow, so you got a cat born and Gemma, you got a joint bank account. Yeah, pretty much. So were your salaries both going into this?

For the first few months, no. It was just like, okay, well, we'd put money in for rent and bills and things like that. And then he closed his account and we just made it into one joint account probably about two months later after that. And then are you still together now? Yeah, we got married last month. Oh, yeah. Congratulations. You just knew maybe, like right from the start. Yeah, I think so.

But about nine months after that's when we got a dog. So we got a little sausage dog. Oh, yes. I approve. I approve. Yeah, I say just do it. It's fine. Yeah. Okay.

Join bank accounts and sausage dogs. Good indications. Jeremy, what was that moment you realised this was a serious relationship? It was probably when about probably 11 months into the relationship, her parents took me on an all expenses paid trip to Raro. Oh! Whoa! Okay.

That's a major seal of approval from them. Yeah, because that's not just like, would you like to come on our exclusive family holiday? They're paying for it. Yeah. But I guess they've got to pay for a room for her anyway, right? No, no, no. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Yeah, wait.

You stayed in the same room, right? I will never take my daughter's boyfriends on holiday. They're not even allowed to come even if they want to pay for their own mate. No. You just don't want them around. Absolutely not. All right. Thanks.

You're cool, Jeremy. Amber, when did you realize it was a serious relationship? Hi there. So a couple of weekends ago, my boyfriend and I went out and we bought matching drawers for our bedroom. Oh! Yes! They've always got a match. Coordinating your intern?

Matching furniture. Yes. Yes. That's a big deal. So how did you decide? Did someone get the tall boy? Yeah, yeah. So actually he went out and bought the tall boy,

and I actually got a bit jealous, and I was like, hey, I want new drawers too. Oh, my God, you've got matching tall boys. Did you get one of your two tall boys? No, he got a tall boy and I got a low boy. Yeah, good, good. Variety, variety. It would be hard to explain to people why one would have two tall boys

in the bedroom. Yeah, yeah. We did not have that before. Oh, variety. It would be hard to explain to people why one would have two tall boys in the bedroom. Yeah, yeah. We did not have that before. Oh, no. So we've been together eight years, so we're like, it's time for matching furniture. Wow. I know.

You know, Ben and I get far less time than that. Are you great? Hey, thanks. You call Amber? Some other text messages. In our biggest relationship milestone, and when we knew it was serious, was when we merged bookshelves

and got rid of the books where we had duplicates. That is a big moment. Cute. Because then if you split, like, who's going to get the... I know. No, no, you're so sure that this relationship's going to last. You're getting rid of your copy of Chamber of Secrets.

Harry, we don't need to. Yeah. Thank you for all the good times on your way somebody said I knew I was in a serious relationship when my partner said I'm giving up smoking for you oh wow

this is serious I knew it was serious when he lost his job and he came home and burst into tears when you see someone cry in front of you when they're vulnerable in front of you. Yeah, yeah, when they're vulnerable. That was a pretty big step.

And, you know, somebody said taking a turd with the door open. So, I mean, from the super romantic to your basic everyday domestic chores. But that's a good point, though. If you've got a bathroom with a toilet and a shower, when they do, you know, the toilet and you're in the shower, that's a big step because you don't do that in the first week. No. I don't do that even now.

That's grim. Somebody said, I was with a guy and he needed a new car. And he said, I'm getting a Ford Territory, you know, Ford planning. And I was like, what does he mean by Ford planning? For babysits and stuff. He was planning for kids and babysits and stuff. We hadn't been together long at the time, so that freaked me out a little bit. And then he was like, let's move in together.

And I was like, what? And then joint bank account and it all got too much. So I was like, bye. But then that's the thing, if someone is moving at a different speed to you, you aren't to blame that they're getting ahead of themselves. Well, now he's got a big old Ford Territory. Yeah.

You never feel lonelier than when you're alone in a big car Are you a relationship with Sirius When we put each other on the wills That's some serious paperwork I don't have a will You're supposed to with like I've written you one up Myself and my children are the main benefactors I just sign that at some stage.

I don't even have anything. You can have my handbag. Nobody wants that old musty. Your musty old handbag. You have to clean it out. And somebody said, I knew it was serious when we went TV shopping together. Oh, yeah.

That's a big one. You're picking what you're going to be watching. Have a little fight over freebie. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And if you really need it, you know, those extra features. Do we need the extra inches? You always need the extra inches. Always.

So there's plenty of steps along the way. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about coffee. Love a bit of coffee. I'm on the BritishCoffeeAssociation.org and it says this website uses cookies to improve your user experience. Except? Because I play fast and loose on the company Wi-Fi. I don't know.

Cookies and coffee. That's a great combo to make. Yeah, when you said cookies, that's the first thing I thought of. Yeah, yeah. Cookies and coffee. That's a great combo to make. Yeah, when you said cookies, that's the first thing I thought of. Yeah, yeah. Cookies. Why do they call them cookies? I don't know.

Make it sound yummier than it is. Mind-blowing. Vaughan's off his chair. I did. I've never questioned that. Why do they call cookies? My brain was like, why?

And this echoing chamber of why, why, why? And like a million chamber of why, why, why. And like a million moments passed in a split second of my brain. And I tasted momentarily every cookie I've ever eaten. Because I had to delete mine the other day because I was searching airfares. And I did that thing where I went on a website and searched an airfare with my friend. Came back like 10 minutes later. It's more expensive because they know you're back.

It's called. Couldn't I have a guess? Yeah. Like a cookie crumbs. You follow your trail. You leave your cookies so that when you go back, you've already been there, so it kind of loads quicker. No.

Damn it. I mean, kind of. It's from magic, the term magic cookies that kind of comes from a fortune cookie. So it has like an embedded message. Oh, right. Like a JavaScript or something. So why are actual cookies called cookies?

Why? Because you cook them. Probably. They should be called bakeys. Bakeys. If I could just go back in time. Yeah. If I had a time machine and I was only allowed to change little things,

I'd definitely go back and be like, I'm going to call them cookies. Whatever this guy is inventing cookies, I'd be like, Bakeys is a better name. Back in time. And I'd come back and you're like, hey, do you want a bakey? I'd be like, yes. It worked. Or you get back and they just don't exist at all

and you ruin the space-time continuum. Oh, I'd have to go back. I'd be like, yes! It worked. Or you get back and they just don't exist at all and you ruin the space-time continuum. Oh, I'd have to go back. I'd be like, cookies was a good idea. Don't listen to that guy that looked like me that came here 30 seconds ago. You stick with what you know, buddy. You stick with what you know. Yeah.

Come back. Okay. I mean, you could. And he's like, do you want a bake? No, I'm not allowed to change major things. Oh, so you're a time traveller that can only change minor things. I am.

Seriously, this is a great idea. I'm going to write a book about a guy who's a time traveller that can only change minor things. Seriously, this is a great idea. I'm going to write a book about a guy who's a time traveller, but he's only allowed to change the most minor details. Right. Because he's got respect for the law of time travel. Just little things that annoy him. Little things that annoy him. Like, okay, we're going to get back to fact of the day.

I'm just going to shut my laptop. We're going with this. So one day he's doing the vacuuming and he unplugs the thing from the wall and he steps on the recoil thing and it goes whiz, whack and hits his ankle. He's like, damn it, those retract too fast. Yep. Back in time, to the Dyson

factory. I see you're putting a retractor cord on a vacuum. Oh, yep. I reckon it's gone a bit too fast. Do you reckon? Yeah, just don't wind the spring as tight. He's like, no, no, fair call. It does actually fly in pretty bloody quick.

You could do an ankle injury. I know. So you're dialing it down a bit? Yeah. All right. Get back to the vacuuming person. It just goes under the casual speed. He's like, much better.

Or it's too slow that it doesn't wind in. Yeah, and he's like, oh, God. goes under the casual speed. Or it's much better. Or it's too slow that it doesn't wind in. Yeah, and he's like, oh God, I can't believe it. Back from the dice, he's like, dial it up half

of what you did split the difference. You're like, who are you? Trust me. Trust me. And the lotto numbers next weekend

are blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's just a little thank you for the cord thing. Back to home. Chris stands on it. Perfect. Some have said it was a waste giving me this time travel device,

but others will never appreciate what I've done for them. No, they won't. The little changes. Okay, back to the coffee website. So, yeah, today's fact of the day is that in 1475, it was legal in Turkey, it was a legal reason to divorce your husband if he failed to provide you coffee. Fair enough. That's not going to do.

Wait here. Excuse me, is this 1475 Turkey? Yes. Let's divorce things a bit so it's going to work. Excuse me, is this 1475 Turkey? Yes. This divorce thing's a bit silly. I don't think it's going to work. Just scroll that out. Okay.

So that never actually happened. So what was today's fact of the day? Today's fact of the day was in 1475. No, it never happened. I know, exactly. But I can tell you that it did, but it didn't. You'll never appreciate it. This is quite a bit to take in. This whole break's been quite a bit to take in time travel-wise.

You're buzzing yourself out now. I'm just going to go back five minutes and convince Warren not to do any of this. I'll be back in a minute. G'day, mate. How's it going? You're about to discover a time travel loophole. Am I? I actually can't even tell you about the time travel loophole

because then you'll never come back and tell yourself to stop talking about the time travel loophole. Forget I was here. Okay. Okay? Should we see? Don't worry about it, guys. Sorry about that.

You probably didn't even notice I was gone. I literally disappeared and came back. Okay, the producers are flashing the lights at you. Guess we'll never know how this could have turned out. So today's Fact of the Day never happened. It did. No, you'll remember it did. I stopped myself from stopping myself.

Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. day. Fletch Vaughan and Megan's Food Fights. The Kiwi Treat Edition. You can vote right now on our Instagram, FVMZM. We are looking for New Zealand's favourite Kiwi treat, the Food Fight. There are some huge rounds at the moment. Oh, they're dropping like flies

every day. We're eliminating, you know, everyone that fails to be champion. Garlic bread. Gone. Out.

Sad. It was a special place in my heart. No. How dare you. So, today's rounds. We announced last hour

the peanut slab is taking on the crunchy. Now this is... Have you got the actual breakdown of how close the votes are? I've got the actual breakdown. It's changed slightly. 52% to 48%. There's maybe 200 votes in it.

And at the moment, the crunchy slightly ahead. Ever so slightly ahead. That sounds like I like them both. Yep. But I went with the crunchy, and I can't even really tell you why. I just like the golden centre, you know? Really? Yeah, crunchy for me.

Crunchy for you. Next one is absolute hiding. Oh, it is shapes are romping all over Raro. Hard to compare the two. Yeah, it is. You can't go past the box of shapes, as it turns out, even if we're using the barbecue shapes as the promotional box of shapes in this, not everybody's favorite flavor.

No. But still, it's enough. We've just announced these two rounds. These two rounds are underway now at our Instagram page. Early in the voting for these two, but as you've said previously, Fletch, not often does the voting change once a trend's developed after a couple of thousand votes. Jelly Tip Ice Cream versus hundreds and thousands biscuits. Jelly tip ice cream are ahead on 56% of the vote.

Yeah, and so there's quite a few votes in that. There's been 3,500 votes cast in that in the time that it's been up. This next round is, at my current calculation, 15 votes are in this. 15 votes. 15 votes. And there are nearly 3,500 votes. Yeah, there has been 3,500 votes. Oh, there's 10 votes in it now.

Just a little bit of an update there on numbers and 10 votes in it. Seven votes in it now. Seven votes in it. Both going up quick. 4,000 votes. Yep. The voting that we're talking about is what could be today's tightest round. Pineapple lumps versus the chalk bar.

Now, this is the ice cream chalk bar. The one where it's chocolate coated with a little coconut in the chocolate and then vanilla ice cream and then a chalk, you know, literally a bar of chocolate in the middle there. I shared one with my daughter last night. She got halfway through and she's like, you can finish this. I was like, yes.

Why are you my favourite? And nine votes. Nine votes in it now. They are delicious. And yeah, 50-50 voting on that one. It's very, very close. It's going to be a heartbreak. At the moment, pineapple lumps.

Nine votes ahead. Yes. Oh, okay. It's good. I love when one's real close because, you know. Oh, my God. Four votes. And now the chalk bar's pulled ahead.

Chalk bar's pulled ahead. We've got a breaker. We've got a late breaker. Well, it's not a late breaker. It's an early breaker. Wow. It's very, very close. So close.

Oh, and now chalk bar's pulled ahead by 12. Okay, we can't keep doing this. We could literally do this all day. We're just going to sit here and give you a running update. Okay, we can't keep doing this. We could literally do this all day. We're just going to sit here and give you a running update. What happens if you click the share results? Oh, that's cool. That's cool.

So vote now. FEMZM, those results, those polls run for 24 hours so we can come back tomorrow with those results. And again, once something is lost, it's eliminated. It's gone. It's gone.

And we're really getting through them. In case you were wondering, we had just two rounds yesterday. You might have wondered who won in the rounds yesterday. Well, as Megan said before, Garlic Bread is gone from the competition. It lost to the Kiwi, the Chips and Kiwi Dip yesterday. And the Choc Fish lost to Fruit Burst. So we'll see those two in the next round. The other voting happening now at our Instagram page, FVMZM.