ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - May 24 2018

Episode Date: May 23, 2018

Vaughan became a modern day hero yesterday, How Do You Know makes a return and your unusual beauty products.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Sparks. Shoot incredible videos in super slow-mo with the Samsung Galaxy S9. 10 out of 10. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. America's going to fine people for standing up for their human rights now. But guns. But they pay these people millions of dollars. Yeah, but standing for a flag is just, oh

goodness me. Oh, if I was in any sort of international sports team for New Zealand, I'd be in big trouble because they mumble parts of the anthem. And you know how when they pan across the sports teams and one of them's not singing and then the next day they're getting like chastised. You know that they pan across you right

on the bit that you know. Yeah, the bit that I'm like. I know, I'd want to be in the first couple of lines. God of nations. Pan off me now, go. And it would just, when the camera was on me, I'd freak. Yeah, yeah. I know. I'm doing it wrong, I'm doing it wrong.

Sorry. Yeah. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. I have sourced three news stories online. Interesting, quirky, unusual, weird news stories. I'm going to give Vaughan and Megan three headlines. They must pick one headline only.

The others are deleted. We never find out about those. Okay. Headline one, one spud too many for concert goer. Another potato story. Love potato stories. We had a potato story yesterday, didn't we?

We did. In the top six. Sorry, in story time. Headline two, police come up short. And headline three, flight attendant channels

Britney Spears toxic on last day on the job. Oh, Britney Spears toxic. That was the the job. Oh, oh, Britney Spears toxic. That was the Martin Henderson. Yeah, Martin Henderson, the Kiwis in that music video. And she's a flight attendant. She's like.

And it's all very sexy. And doesn't she, she, um, can't think of the right word to say, but she would straddle him. Yeah. She straddles him and then spits in his mouth. Is that what happened? No, it didn't quite go that far. So, Flight Attendant for Ryanair did a full

dance routine to Toxic. Yes. On his last day. That is not allowed. I figured that would be the easy one to Google. What one do you want? Story 2. What was Story 2? Police Come Up Short. I think I want the potato one. What's the potato one to Google. Okay. What one do you want? Story 2. What was Story 2? Police Come Up Short.

But no, I think I want the potato one. What's the potato one? I've forgotten. One Too Many Potatoes. One Spud Too Many for Concert Goer. Yeah, that one.

Why have they got potatoes at a concert? Fries. Oh, yeah, true. Okay, Story 1. A chunky cut fry. We go to China. We go to China now.

We're a... Of course, it's festival season in China. Well known for their music festivals. The dog festival's coming up, which is sad. The dog eating. I thought that had gone. I thought we'd stop the dog eating festival.

No, I've seen stuff online. I don't read it because I'm always just like, ugh, keep scrolling. It's disgusting. We go to China now. And China's been in the news quite a lot recently For its Big Brother technology Oh, okay, yeah, shouldn't have googled that

It's still going ahead, by the way Yeah, I know, sad, eh? Ricky Gervais goes crazy about this Oh, a lot of people do It's the cruel nature of the Yeah, it is The whole thing, awful Well, in China, they've been in the news

for their Big Brother technology and the way that they control people but they are using a lot of facial recognition and a man was at a concert with another 20,000 concert goers when

he was identified and flagged in the crowd by the computer system when he was identified and flagged in the crowd by the computer system. And he was arrested at the Sports Centre Stadium according to the South China Morning Post because he had stolen

$17,000 worth of potatoes. Heavens, that's a lot of potatoes. And they found him at this concert. So imagine you break the law. Yeah. And you're at Spark Arena

watching, I don't know, what would you be there for? Pink. You're Vaughn's there. I'm on my third pink gig. You're on your third pink show. Some have said

I'm greedy, but I just can't get enough. You can't get enough. And the camera sees you, the security surveillance camera sees you, flags you, runs you against the police database, and that's it.

And that's it, I'm done. I'm done. You're being pulled from the mosh pit. Gosh, that's scary, isn't it? I mean, it's not a bad thing. If you're not breaking the law, you've got nothing to worry about. Well, yeah, until the law breaks you, man. Yeah, true. You know, until the laws change and all of a sudden you're not allowed to kneel during the national anthem.

And that becomes a law breaking and then they'll get you. Well, if you think that's bad or like bad luck for that guy, a man was found in a concert of 60,000 people. He was wanted for economic crimes. Or stealing more potatoes. Stealing more potatoes. They don't go into what he was wanted for, but they found him at a huge arena, flagged him,

and then were able to arrest him. That's kind of the future, isn't it? That is crazy. It's insane. He just needed to wear disguises everywhere. Yes. Like a moustache. Prosthetic noses.

Can you full facial recognition with a moustache? Because it blows my mind on the iPhone 10 that I purchased. Okay. Yeah. It's not really a bragging point anymore, is it? No. Anyway, it blows my mind in the dark because you can unlock it with your face.

You do all your face scanning when you first get it. You can unlock it in the dark with half your face covered. That's pretty crazy. It still knows that it's you. But then when you go to the airport and it's like, stand here and look at the camera, sometimes it's like, no, don't know who you are, go to the kiosk.

Oh, did you eat some of those potatoes? You stole their chubs because you don't look like your passport photo anymore. Because mine didn't work on the way back from my holiday of three weeks last year. Yeah. Before your wedding. And I was like, oh God, what have I eaten? Yeah, but you went to Europe in winter and sent me lots of photos

of sausages. I know, they have lots of sausages and mulled wine. Some even look too big to eat, some of those sausages. And that's why

I didn't recognise you. because it worked when I came back from Australia. You're a different person. Like a few months ago, it was fine, the facial recognition.

Do you think sometimes the facial recognition also, it kind of depends on where you've been and where you're coming from? Maybe. It's just like, maybe we should just

have a chat to this guy. Oh yeah, maybe. See if he's brought back any pingers from my beef. Well, this is a real pain for people like me to read that two of the world's biggest hotel chains

are going to be ditching their mini toiletries that you always steal and take home to use next time you go somewhere that doesn't have mini toiletries. I've currently got some on my shower from a trip, but I'm not opposed to this because they're tiny little plastic bottles and everyone steals them.

I agree there is a lot of plastic waste. You guys are going to call me like princess of something or whatever. I already know what you're going to say. Can I predict what you're going to say? Okay, what? I don't use the free washing things in the hotels because I've got sensitive skin. Thank you.

And it drives me out. Are you kidding me? No, he doesn't. I've seen he takes his own toiletries. I just take my own bottle of soap from home, my liquid soap. I'm not even too precious for that shampoo. No, but it's like... Because I just use supermarket shampoo.

I use it at the gym and it's the only thing I wash my bed with. But it's okay if you're staying in like an ooh-la-la, like when work pays at a work hotel, because that soap's pretty decent stuff. It's from the same place as the cheap soap, Fletch. Is it? For reals. But even that stuff I don't use.

But some of that, I've used it and it'll get itchy. I don't like it. Do you not use the soap provided in the backpack as you stay in when you travel on your own dime? Because it's got somebody's pub in it. No, I won't use it. Especially if it's a mini soap bar. Don't use that. That's never a good.

Oh, I know I never use a mini soap bar. Because by the time I try to open this, I've got wet hands and you slip, slide in the place. You are so much of a princess. Like, I'm real basic compared to you. Yeah, you're more of a princess than Megan. 100. You're more high maintenance than Megan. I'll use the barstool.

You are. I'm pretty cute though, eh? No. Yes. If we were to draw a pie graph of the show's maintenance levels, you'd be a very large portion of pie Megan would be too I'd be a sliver

like a margin of error sliver I don't know about that I'm low maintenance I'm low maintenance You're very high maintenance in other areas I'm like a driveway

with cobblestones In saying that I will steal the little bottles of soap and shampoo because like When you've got people hanging and staying over

Well yeah because like if my parents come and say I don't have shampoo because I don't have hair. Bull, you give them that so they don't use

your nice stuff. And that too, yeah. Oh yeah, just grab the toiletries out of the drawer second down. No, we'll just use the stuff that's in there.

You will not. You will not. Do you remember when Vaughn used to come around after the gym and use my shower? only a pea-sized mouthful. And I had to make sure you weren't pumping out too much. Unbelievable. Did you go you remember when Vaughan used to come around after the gym and use my shower? Yeah, and you were like, only a pea-sized mouthful. And I had to make sure you weren't

pumping out too much. Unbelievable. Did you go in there when he's naked and be like, show me how much? I drew a line on the soap and said, it doesn't go below this line. And he'd give me a full pat down to make sure I wasn't smuggling any products out. There was a couple of internal searches. I don't really want to talk about it.

So the hotel's doing this for the environment? Well, yes. They're saying that there's still going to be things in the hotels that it's more likely to be those really gross wall-mounted pump bottles. I don't like those. They'd make them nice looking. I don't like those. Why don't you like those?

I've never seen a nice one. I've never seen a wall-mounted pump bottle. See, least high maintenance out of the three. Oh, no. I don't know what it is about them that I don't like. It's just the weird pumping and it's on a wall and it's a big, I don't know, it just feels like chemical. What about the hotels where you go into, and it feels like, you know, at work, when you're

washing your hands after the toilet, they've got those wall-mounted pump things. Yeah, and you use that. They've got those in the shower. I don't. Are you a bit weirded out by it? I'm just weirded out. I think it's because, to me, it feels like it doesn't belong there. It's not, I don't think it's too good for that soap.

Some of them do like big tubes of like nice stuff. Oh, I see. I'd like to see a nice one. Of course they're not going to have a big industrial black hand dispenser in the shower. They might do. They might. I've stayed places where they do. You two need to calm your farm, you bloody princesses.

So they're saying the environment. The environment, but also they do provide them to be used on site. But everybody just takes them. Everyone takes them. And if you think of how many rooms, how many people, like they have to refill those every day. That's so many little bottles. Yeah.

They're not refilling them, though. No, I know. People are taking them away and then throwing them out. Oh, but they put a new one there. I thought you imagined they poured little into the half-used ones. One hotel reviewer, even he said he was against this idea. He's now for it because he said because they're not getting stolen, they can afford to use a nicer product.

There you go, Fletch. They're not, though, are they? I wouldn't imagine so. It's like when they have that sign in your hotel room. It's like, oh, you know, don't chuck your towels on the floor. What about the environment? We love the environment. It's just soap. It's just soap for one

night. I don't know. I don't care because I take my own, so I don't care what they do. Well, I like stealing things, so if you take away my soap, I'm taking your irons. I'm going to take the ironing board too and then just claim it wasn't there when I got there. Because who steals an ironing board? That's madness.

It'll be in my boogie board bag and my travel companion Chappelle Corby will be carrying it. Well yeah, this is why when we check into a hotel for work Megan and I hover back

and let Vaughan put his credit card down on all the rooms. Oh, I just said this should be taken care of. Please speak to my people and I have to say that because at that time,

you guys in Wellington got carried away and helped yourself to the minibar. It was just a few jelly beans. Yeah, those jelly beans are very expensive for jelly beans. FEM. ZM. A supermarket in the UK, because you know supermarkets here, a lot of them already starting to phase up plastic bags. Yeah, they announced the countdown.

Ten countdown supermarkets are doing it. My local doesn't have bags anymore, yeah. I was impressed to see Gisborne on the list. I know the locals in Gisborne are very aware of the environment and everything. Well, there's that Nelson supermarket that's done away with them. Yeah. You get paper bags there and these boxes. I like paper bags.

You can also buy thicker plastic bags for for 15 cents but you're supposed to reuse those a couple of times. Is that weird? So instead of having like thin plastic bags, it's like a thicker plastic bag. Oh, it's just more likely to choke the animal that ends up with it. You need to use this like three times. Oh, no one's using it there. That's boring. No one's using that three times.

So those reusable hessian ones, you've just got to forget to take them. Those are like a dollar though. So that's how they get ones. Yeah, yeah. You just got to keep forgetting to take them. Those are like a dollar, though. So that's how they get you. You get a couple of those every time you go, don't you? But a supermarket in the UK has announced that they will be also cutting back on a lot of plastics.

So plastic bags is one thing, but there's a lot of plastic packaging with fruit and produce. And dry bananas, pun intended, when I see bananas wrapped in plastic. They were already in a case that nature gave them. Most fruit has a case, doesn't it? Yeah, mandarins. Yeah.

So they're phasing a lot of that out. But one thing that is hard to phase out, meat. What do you put your meat on? Oh, like the black, are you talking like the black styrofoam? Yeah, because you've got to have one of those and then a sanitary pad. Yeah. And then you block a mince. Yeah.

So they're asking customers to bring Tupperware in. I'd do that. So you take in a container. Yeah, and I'm assuming you get it as opposed from the fridge kind of area. You get it from the deli. So it's all the minces in a big pile. Okay. Behind a glass screen.

Like when you buy like, you can still do that with some supermarkets. You can buy your chops and your meat bits, can't you? Yeah. So then you bring in your container and I'm guessing they reset the scales. They put it on, press tear. Was that right? I've never known. Tar?

Tar. T-A-R-E. I don't know what that, I never knew what that means. That just means reset to zero. To zero. Does it? I thought that was like the Tare. I was like, oh, I wonder what that does. It's reset, you put it on and you press that button

and then it resets the scales to zero. Why do you guys turn it off on and off every day? It's called unladen weight. It's the weight of an empty vehicle or container by subtracting it from the gross weight. What did you guys think that button did? On and off. I just pressed reset. And I've never pressed anything with that on it.

No, you put that on your digital scales and then you press that button and it resets it to whatever's on there. But I've just got a reset button. I don't have that. So you don't have a tar button, you've got a reset button. So your reset button is the tar button. But I'm still not sure of what does that say how to say it? It doesn't say.

It doesn't say how to say it, does it? It says, yeah, tar. Well, anyway, you put your Tupperware or your Sistema. I'm not like brand aligned. I'm not brand aligned here. Oh, no, no, no. Or your Thai takeaway dish that you want to get a second use out of. Oh, that's a bit manky, but you could do that if you've washed it.

Give it a wash. Okay. And then, yeah, they'd put a sticker on that and then you're recycling and you're saving the planet. I think that's a great idea. Great idea. That's good too

because there's always just real little mints or real big mints. And I want like a very specific weight of a mints. In between. I'll tell you what,

you can probably do it already. But the problem is, guys, it takes the plastic in there. If I bring my lunch in a container or I get a bit of leaky juice takes the plastic in there. If I bring my lunch in a container or I get a bit of leaky juice in my bag, so I don't want to

get some mints and have some leaky juice on the way home. Oh, but I think you'd get it home before leaky juice became too much of a problem. And like, you're going to end up

going to the supermarket, you're going to remember bags and your containers. You're going to look like a homeless person walking into the supermarket. Going into the supermarket. Rattling in there

with your trolley that you made yourself. Yeah, I bought my own trolley. No, we can reuse the ones here. I bought my own trolley. We've heard of thigh gap, thigh brow. There was hip cleavage. The Kardashians made that famous. Which was hip cleavage?

So it's when you are sitting and you get like a crease at the top of your thigh. Oh, yeah. I thought that was thigh brow. They're kind of the same thing, I think. There is a new one, and this one's actually quite a good name. The Toblerone Tunnel. That sounds very dirty. I just want to remind you, we're on the radio right now.

Not dirty. So I'm imagining it has something to do with a triangle and a body shape. Yeah. Is it your elbow? No. It's a little bit sexier than the elbow. You know you can take a photo and it looks like a bum. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good stuff.

That's good stuff. So I guess it's moved on from the side gap and right at the top of a woman's genitalia. Undercarriage? Yep. Undercarriage, yep. This reminds me of Melissa McCarthy in Bridesmaids.

Talking about her undercarriage. And the gooch. Do girls have a gooch? Everybody's got a gooch. Everybody's got a gooch, yeah. It's the part just in front of the butthole. That area. So there's a little triangle that points down right before the legs touch again.

So it's like a thigh gap. Yeah, but it's just at the top. And it's triangular. So it's like a thigh gap, but the thigh is touching. It's just the top that's open. So you're leaving like a see-through tunnel. Yeah. And it's triangle-shaped, thus the Toblerone Tunnel.

If you search the hashtag on Instagram, it's just starting to pick up. Chris Marlowe. Triangle. Can guys get a Toblerone Tunnel? Ah, what are you doing? Don't pull your pants down. Do I have one, though? Can you see the tunnel?

No, you don't. I can see your tunnel from here. You're a different kind of tunnel. Particularly Toblerone looking. Damn it. This is like the thigh gap. I couldn't do that either. It's kind of blur together.

Do you want to blur together? Blur. No, no, I actually, I didn't want to go on about it, but I did have a wonderful, I had a great thigh gap. Right, okay. What is it? Toblerone Tunnel. Tunnel, yeah.

How do you spell? Heather, bloody how do you spell Toblerone? Tob. Le. Rone. Le. Rone. Okay, gotcha.

I'm just wondering if guys, if this is even possible for guys because of the balls. I don't think so. Oh, yeah. The balls would stop that. You know what? That's the equivalent of like an avalanche of rocks coming down in front of the tunnel. Yeah, it is.

And then you've got to get, I don't know, Fulton Hogan to clear it away. Yes. You've got to close the road. Yeah. For a couple of days. It's a right bloody mess. Maybe blast, total her own landslide. Maybe blast the area.

Yeah. And it just doesn't have the same sexy effect, I don't think, like if you sent that to a girl. Unless we built like a mesh fence to hold the rocks above. I actually think that's a great idea. I don't know. Oh, see, now this is wrong because some of these girls are just putting up thigh gaps and claiming to be Toblerone tunnels.

But they've got to be triangular. That's a perfect one that I'm showing you. Oh, that almost looks like heart-shaped, though. Yeah, right. I can see another one here. Right, okay. Well, that almost looks like heart-shaped, though. Yeah, right. I can see another one here. Right. Okay, well, it's the latest trend. Let's see a guy.

Oh, yeah, a guy's doing it. No, he's got an actual Toblerone between his legs. Oh, okay. And then in the next photo, he's putting as much in his mouth as he can. I don't know what's happening here. What have you Googled? Toblerone tunnel. Okay.

So the winter weather, the snow that has fallen has affected quite a few roads. The Crown Range Road and the Desert Road, so both North and South Island, they're closed. Is it the first road closure of the winter season?

Well, no, I think yesterday there was quite a lot of snow down south, which has been causing a bit of havoc. We'll have all the latest in a news update for you next. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith.

Hello there. In the news over the last day has been the fact that before the year 2020, it's looking kind of maybe like 2019. So it's like next year. Wow. We could be voting on the legalisation of Marijuana, but also where we want this euthanasia

thing to sit. How do you think New Zealanders will vote on both of those? If you had to just put a percentage on? No to both. You know to both. If there's anything that's going to get

the progressive... I wouldn't say no to both. No, but you think New Zealand on a whole would. Yeah. That's disappointing. It amazes me that people are so passionate about the euthanasia thing. Like, if someone wants to end their life because they're in pain and they're miserable, then why not let them? There's got to be worded right, and I'm not saying I'm the person to come in hot on how to word it.

Get it all done right. They'd sign it when they're sound of mind before they deteriorate. And you've got to, overseas when you do it, you've got to go to a doctor and you've got to have like, you've got to see a psychologist, don't you? So it's not like you can just walk off the street and do it in an hour. It'd be great if they don't get this sorted, you know, next year if they could get it sorted before my mum goes downhill

because I'm going to have to smother her with a pillow. And I am aware that's probably a premeditated murder charge. You've made a pact with her, haven't you? It's the least I can do. But do you think

New Zealanders will vote? And I will say to her as I'm doing it, I'll be like, you brought me into this world and I'm taking you out. Do you think New Zealanders will vote for marijuana?

I think they will but only just. I don't think it's as popular as everyone thinks. It will depend if people celebrate the fact that there is a referendum the night

before it happens by smoking too much marijuana and then forgetting to go. Oh yeah, because the stoners will forget to vote. But if there's anything that's going to motivate stoners

it's going to be more weed, right? But it's not just stoners though, is it? It's very medicinal as well. Yeah, yeah. And just for people who have had a hard day at work and the bottle shop shut.

Yeah, medicinal. Just pick a little off. Yeah, or for Nan if they don't pass the euthanasia thing. Yeah, just for people who have had a hard day at work and the bottle shop shut down. Yeah, medicinal. Just pick a little off. Yeah, or for Nan if they don't pass the euthanasia. Yeah, true. Nan's like, right then, see you on the other side. So the top six other things I think New Zealand needs to have a referendum on before 2020. Let's get these underway. Number six, should chicken chips be banned?

I'm strongly behind them being banned. Chicken chips. Chicken chips. Have you had them. Chicken chips. Chicken chips. Have you had them? Chicken chips. No, no. See, what's happening here, you're talking about sticks of chicken deep fried.

Yeah. No, I'm talking about potato chips. Potato chips. Oh, yeah, ban those. Yeah. See, this is why it's important that we get a legal team with wording. Yeah.

Because I almost outlawed anything that could be considered a chip that's made to taste like chicken. Yeah, BK were doing the chicken chips. Oh, those were yum. Oh my god. Oh yeah, no, those were yum. Oh my god. Oh please. I wish my wording had been better. Yeah. Should

chicken flavoured potato chips be banned? They should, yes. They should, yeah. Although I'd rather have a ban on ready salted, a referendum on ready salted. No, but ready salted you can put in a dip and it's quite nice. I see, I a ban on ready salted. I'm referring to them on ready salted. No, but ready salted, you can put in a dip and it's quite nice. I see. I don't think ready salted should be banned because you still need to know who you don't want to be friends with anymore. Oh, yeah.

Okay. Fair call. And if they bring ready salted to a party, they're not the sort of people you need to be friends with. But if it was there, I'd eat it. You know? Okay. Let's move on. We'll be here a while if we're debating.

This is why we need a referendum. Yeah. Number five on the list of the top six referendums we need to have before the year 2020. Which way the cutlery goes in a dishwasher basket? Always up. But again, this is... Handle down. Handle down.

Head up. Yeah. Dirty bit up. Dirty bit up. Fletch. Always dirty bit up. Well, I've got the fancy dishwasher now. Oh, you lay yours down flat.

Because I've got a new dishwasher. It's flat. They go flat. At least it's like a spiky knife. Then it I've got the fancy dishwasher now. Oh, you lay yours down flat. Because I've got a new dishwasher. It's flat. They go flat. At least it's like a spiky knife. Then it's got to go down for safety. Oh, no. I put the spiky knife up as a test. No, I'm with Megan.

Spiky knife down for safety. Yeah. Everything else pointing up. PC madness. Do you know, I thought that actually left out the cutlery basket when I got my dishwasher delivered. I was like, where do you put the knife? They lie down at the top.

There's a separate drawer that comes out. I don't know how you really restrict it. Like, could you put an ice cream scoop or like a thicker utensil? They fit in the light

of it. But don't they sit in water? What about a soup ladle? I put that in the other drawer lying across. How do they air dry?

Are they not sitting in like water? No, no, no, no. It's good. It's great. It's like it sits on a mesh drawer at the top. I don't know if the water would sit on the mesh, wouldn't it? no, no, no. It's good. It's great. It's like it sits on a mesh drawer at the top. I know, but the water would sit on the mesh, wouldn't it?

No, it doesn't. It's like the standard drawers. It all just runs off. It's coated in that plastic that doesn't... Okay. Yeah. I was actually very impressed when I saw your dish. Thank you, Walt.

And you know I'm a hard man to impress. Yeah. What number are we up to? Number four. Okay. See, this is what I'm saying. Every one of them leads to a healthy debate. Right. Top six referendums we need to have before the year 2020 are number four. See, this is what I'm saying. Every one of them leads to a healthy debate. Right.

Top six referendums we need to have before the year 2020. Number four. Are those one car per green light traffic lights at the motorway compulsory or just a suggestion? Okay. Because I am not stopping if nothing's coming. I have a question. Do they like monitor those? No.

Okay, good. Why should I abide by it if you're not going to? Jump on board, baby. Let's just roll through this thing. No, but then if we're all doing it, then there's still problems with the traffic. You've got to do your bit. If it's really busy, you'll do your bit.

Nah, I won't stop. Nah, I don't worry about it. Because the guy next to me does, so I just take advantage of it being two lanes down to one and get in front. Same. I'm not waiting. I'm just like, oh, I'm not from the big city.

I don't know how this works. They don't monitor them because if they did, this guy would have so many demerit points. Roll through. Number three on the list of the top six other referendums we need to have before the year 2020. Kale. Do we really need it?

I'm for no. I mean, kale chips are okay, but then there's potato chips. Yeah. And anything kale can do, cabbage can do better. Peckle. Cabbage is so good. Number two on the list of the top six other referendums we need to have before the year 2020. Is it schedule or schedule and do we need both?

I still don't know the answer to that. One is I'll check my schedule and someone is I'll schedule you in. I'll schedule the bus service. Yeah. It's the bus schedule. The bus schedule. I don't I'll schedule you in. I'll schedule the bus service. Yeah. It's the bus schedule. The bus schedule. I don't think I ever say schedule. Everything's just schedule.

But the bus could be. We don't need both. Okay, well, they're different. We don't need it. Yeah. They say them the same and they can apply to multiple things, even though those two things are very similar. We don't need it.

That's my thoughts. Number one on the list of the top six other referendums we need to have for the year 2020. Number one, smacking other people's kids. Yes. I fully agree. You don't need to be smacking your own kids because you should be putting time and effort

into wearing them down over time and psychologically messing with them. But other people's kids, it's like they're going home soon and I just want to deal with them. Can I smack them if they're being nice? Probably not. I go and pick up my daughter from school and, I mean, I'm biased, but she's angelic.

These other kids. Well, Indy or August? These other kids. Indy. August, jury's out. Jury's out. But I've got time to wear her down at home. Like last night, I told her I'm calling the police

and I picked up the phone and I said, night, I told her I'm calling the police. And I picked up the phone. And I said, look, I'm sorry I gave you so many warnings. Now I have to call the police. And it was just shut down. Now that's a long-term psychological breakdown. I don't have time to do that with other people's kids. Can I give them a quick smack?

No, you can't. I think we should bring it to the people. Bring it to the people. Okay, now. Bring it to the people. Okay, I'll put it into a perspective you'll understand. You're on a plane. Yes, you should be able to smack them. Thank you very much. Thank you very much.

Thank you very much. That's the day's top six. And poll results are in. How many? 72, 73% of people think your dance moves are on fire. Yeah, that was on the ZM Instagram. I was just looking on the poll. Yeah, 73% voted that my dance moves are on fire. That's not the poll we want to talk about, though.

Well, I would love to talk more about that poll. We've run out of time for that now. Do you want to tell me the poll results first, or shall I tell you what the story is first? Let's go the story first. Okay, okay. So this is an Australian study. So we wanted to know if it's the same in New Zealand.

But they have found that 30% of those in a relationship thought it was okay to have sex in front of their pet. 30%. So the dog or the cat is just in the room. Like I'm imagining on the bed or on the floor or wherever your cat or dog hangs out. However, cat owners are worse. So 50% of cat owners do it. Is it because cats doesn't take up a lot of room and it's probably curled up asleep?

But I feel like a cat's more judgmental. It's like side-eyeing you. Cats do give you those. You're naked and you look over it and it's like, yuck. Yeah, cats have ultimate bitchy resting face. And that also translates into like judgment. And if you're insecure, I can remember the last time I caught the cat's eye during lovemaking.

So do you think this is okay? I'm wildly against it. I didn't know the cat was in the room. And then I turn around and it's sitting on the end of the bed and it's like, yuck. On the end of the bed? Yeah. The cat's on the... This was way... This was a long time ago.

And ever since, I have been a strict room checker pre-coitus. Right. I'll do a... You'll do a sweep. I'll do a sweep. Like the secret service looking for bugs.

I run that little electronic thing around that'll pick up any bugs that the dog or cat may have planted. Yeah. And I just... I'll never forget the look. And it's just the most, yuck.

Maybe that's why Anakin still looks at you like that. Yeah. He can't remember, I can't remember, our relationships never been the same.

He was probably trying to sleep on the end of the bed and you were jiggling him. Oh, yuck. And he's like, yuck. He's like,

oh, don't worry, this won't last long. Yeah, he's like, how long is this going to be? Not long. What about your stupid little dog, Megan? No, he's out. how long is this going to be? I'm like, not long. What about your stupid little dog, Megan? No, he's out.

You've never just been in the lounge and it's happened and he's been there? No. No. Okay. He gets shut into a different room because he looks like... And he's a humper. He humps. Megan's dog humps.

Not all the time. He humped, was it Indy once? Yeah, she was like, oh, I'm petting the dog. I was like, no, that dog's a hump in your leg. It is hump in your leg. And she's like, ah, get it off. How do we feel in the producers booth about this? Producers, do you think it's all right to have sex in front of the pet?

No. Well, I don't have any pets, but we'll see. Or give any sex. You line them up, they get knocked down. They line them up, they get knocked down. They line them up and they get knocked down. They're laughing at you. James, the producer,

do you have any flat pets? No, no flat pets but in the past there has been different experiences of jumping dogs. Dogs that like to jump up. What?

I might not have had any underwear on at the time. Well, no, generally you make love without undies on. I made a run maybe to the bathroom or something and a dog started jumping up.

It was very annoying. Ever since that experience, no. Did you get? No, you locked them out. Okay, Anya? Nah, I could never do it. Like, we've got a cat and I just feel like his eyes, like, I just get judgment and just sit there like, nah, girlfriend, that's not how you do it or something, you know?

Yeah. And it just weird me out. Although, we haven't asked Fletch. No, Kat goes out. But he always tries to get in. So you just hear the door. Just pawing at the door. Just like, bang, bang.

Well, he wants to know if you're okay. What's going on in there? Daddy, you all right? There's a lot of weird noise. What's happening? Is weird noise that's happening. Is everybody okay? Alright, alright.

They, oh no, yeah, I just, no way. Like maybe once but then you will never do it again. Yeah,

so one in three Australians think that's okay. So we have put this to you New Zealand, our poll on our Instagram, FEMZM

and it's about, it's about the same, eh? Yep, I'll just give you the latest because I just checked it a moment ago

yeah percentage wise 63% of people saying no and 37% saying yeah that's fine so even just a little bit

more in the favour of yeah that's fine than the standard Australian response It's weird though isn't it? I feel like someone in this

like room is not telling the truth though for those stats to be true and there's six of us, someone's lying. I think we're just prudish. Why is everyone looking at me? No way the cat gets kicked out. I reckon you're a high fiver with the cat afterwards.

No. Cat's like, not bad, not bad at all. Not bad. It's good stuff. High five. Okay. Cat high five. My bad. It's good stuff. High five. Okay. Kat, high five. My lovely wife's not very well at the moment.

She's got a very bad cold, and I feel for her, mostly because she's sniffing all the time, and that drives me crazy. But I do feel for her. Right. I said, are you doing everything you can? She said, yeah. And I said, have you tried some Vicks?

And she said, no, I don't like that. And I said, well, you haven't tried everything. Has she had a lemon honey? Oh my God. Yeah, yeah. She's been big on the lemon teas. And then uses some Manuka honey in the lemon tea. She's been slamming those. But yesterday, I think we've reached peak sickness yesterday.

I got home from work and she was back in bed. Right. And I was like, this isn't good because she's not usually a bed even if she's sick. She'll battle through it normally. Yeah, she'll push on through. So I said, look, what needs doing? I'll get, I'll step up. Then she said, well, I haven't got anything sorted

for dinner, and that's like a stress for any mum. Yeah. You know, remember what your mum was like when you were a kid, and she had to go, well, I don't have anything sorted for dinner, Ian. I can imagine that. I can count the amount of times my mum would have said that. Yeah. Well, I'm busy. I don't have anything sorted for dinner. And I said, oh that. I can count the amount of times my mum would have said that. Well, I'm busy. I don't have anything sorted for dinner.

And I said, oh, I can take care of that. That's not a problem. Yeah. I'll do this. Because I knew that last night the Han Solo Star Wars movie was the premiere and I got an invite and I very much wanted to see it. Okay. So I knew that if I could get the house in running shape and in order, I would still be able to go to the movie.

Right. So I said, look, you put your phone down and you go back to sleep. I've got this. So I got dinner all sorted, made it all ready for the oven. Yeah. And then I went and got August. What did you make? I made, it was a roast chicken, Megan,

and a vegetable thing. Okay. Protein. Shut up. Oh, it was my food bag. I didn't make it. Oh, okay. I just followed beautiful Nadia Lim's recipe.

Right. I just imagined Nadia's there with me, helping me along. Shana's like, who are you talking to? I'm like, Nadia. Oh, nobody. So made that, got that all sorted. Yeah.

Went and picked up August Bought her home Got her fed And went back Got Indy from school Came back Got her fed Got August dressed for ballet

Took August to ballet Took Indy as well You know Just doing the stuff That Sade does I mean I go to ballet And pick up and everything But

And so I get them home I get them all sorted We do homework Yeah We get all sorted. Dinner goes in the oven. Right. Dinner comes out cooked.

Sade comes down. She enjoys dinner. She's like, thank you so much for holding the fort down. This has been amazing. You're a good man. And I'm like,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Yeah, I am. Okay. But yeah. Does she know that you're only doing that? So then I'm like, I hope you haven't forgotten.

I've got that Star Wars movie tonight. She's like, oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. Of course. After. Oh, I mean, you've got everything all sorted. So girls bathed in their pajamas. Yeah. And she just put them into bed and went back to bed herself.

And I got to go to the Star Wars movie. And even when I got home, she's like, I just, today, you just stepped just stepped up this was so fantastic and I was like hey hey all for you all for you mostly for Star Wars mostly 99% Star Wars no it was I did she was sick but like if Star Wars hadn't been on I would have been a bit more like, come on. 60% of it. Come on, let's get up. I think the problem is you're here. You just need to get back into your schedule, you know? When you're sick, how does it go down?

Don't be sick. Come on, let's do this together. Get up and try. I mean, you're not trying hard enough. I just got it all on lock. Yeah, come on, Get up and try. I mean, you're not trying hard enough. I just got it all. Got it all on lock. Yeah, come on. Get up and shake it up. Put some Vicks on.

So 98% for Star Wars then. If we were going to put a ratio on it, probably a fair ratio to put on. But even this morning, I just messaged her and said, how are you feeling this morning? She said, much better. Like the day yesterday, again, thank you so much for holding the fort down. Oh, my God. And I said, it's okay.

It's okay. It's all for you. How long are you going to dine out on this for? I'm not going to push my luck. Right. And today you're not going to do as much, are you? Because there's no movie on tonight. I don't think there's any need to rush. Oh my god. I don't think there's any need to put...

She'll need to get out of bed today. To be honest, I feel a little tickle coming off. I'm probably going to need a nap this afternoon. Right, okay. So she'll have to get out of bed and do something. I would imagine so. Yeah, right. I mean, what dinner's...

I haven't got anything sorted for dinner. All right. It's not easy being a hero. And not all heroes wear capes. But we're out there, ladies and gentlemen. We're out there. A couple of minutes blowing your own trumpet. Yeah.

And the Star Wars movie is so good. Okay. Five seconds of summer. At the moment, Timaru, the lowest temperature, you've got it, minus 1.7. Christ, it's at the moment on two degrees, but feeling like minus one. There was hail in Auckland yesterday. Chili, it is, it's a chili. Sorry, I just realised.

You're from the South Island, you know how that sort of stuff goes down. Gosh, it was chilly yesterday. Oh, think about putting on a jacket. And then the hail was a minor inconvenience until it melted two seconds after it hit the ground. But a lot of snow for the mountain passes, so if you're out driving this morning,

take care. The Crown Range and the Desert Road are closed at the moment. And ACC have said, look, you just be very careful when it comes to hot water bottles. Because... Because I get mocked

because I've got a hot water bottle. I don't really use it that much. Only if it gets real cold. I've got a heat sack, but it doesn't hold the heat as well as a hot water bottle does. They last a couple of minutes. Just get an electric blanket.

No. No. You know my thoughts on electric blankets. I don't like lying on electricity. It weds me out. And also because I like to jump on my bed sometimes as an adult. I'm afraid of wires. And it'll mess with the wires.

And then you wet the bed every now and then. Do you jump on your bed? Sometimes. I'm just like... And do star jumps. Or I'll take a shortcut and instead of walking around my bed,

walk over it. Oh, yeah, I do that. I do that. And it's like, oh, I've got to go to the other side of this. I'm certainly not circumnavigating it.

Straight across. It's weird. In our spare room to like pull the curtains or shut the windows, I just walk up and over the bed and Sharlay's always like,

why are you walking on it? And the pillows go everywhere. Oh my god, it's a nightmare. It's just life, I'm not walking around the end of it. But then the weird part is I have to walk around the end of it on the way back to shut the other windows. Do you then fix the bed? Oh, not really. It's fine. Oh god, I hate it when everyone

sits on the bedspread. So that's why I don't and also because I knew this girl that was using electric blanket and caught on fire and burned her. Oh, my God, no. Yeah, and plus a slow cooker. I feel like you're in a slow cooker. I don't like them.

Well, you are bristly. You would need a slow cooker. Yeah, but I said the problem is you've got to stop going to bed with, like, potatoes and onions in a packet of soup, mate. In an OXO cube. That's why it feels like a slow cooker. Because you're starting yourself with vegetables. Oxo cube.

And a corn silver side with some sliced up cabbage. That'd be why. Well, you know, for a lot of people, the hot water bottle, it's cheap and quick and easy, isn't it? And sometimes you wake up in the morning and it's still warm. Yep. Well, because you can get knitted covers or police covers. I never grew up with a flash hot water bottle that was still warm in the morning

because ours were always, in the middle of the night, they were stone cold. Now, that's why you've got to have some insulation on them, like wool. Yeah. Well, actually, you should do, just because ACC have said since 2013, there has been a bunch of claims of people who have been burnt. So in 2013, 500 claims. In 2017, last year, 631 claims from people who were burnt by hot water bottles. Are they making a resurgence because of how expensive electricity is during the winter months and how expensive it is to heat your home?

You just jump into bed with a couple of hotties. Maybe, yeah. Or a couple of hotties. If you could jump into bed with a couple of hotties every night at 1pm, that'd be awesome. But I've always used one. Like, I didn't know they went out of trend. I know this is bad, but you're not meant to put boiling water in, eh?

But I always say, I've seen that label, like, don't fill me with boiling water. Say, don't tell me what to do, you stupid bottle. Yeah, I don't want to be cold in the morning when I wake up. I want you to last a little while. I want you to be unbelievably hot to touch while I'm trying to get to sleep. Yeah. And then I want you to be stone cold in the morning. But always burp it.

But I thought it was because... What do you mean always burp it? So you squeeze the air out and then... Yeah. Yeah. But I thought it was because they were leaking

and people were getting burns from the hot water. No, it's because you leave... So you're leaving a pure hot water bottle with no cover on your body. 15 minutes is all it takes and then you'll get burnt.

Are you kidding me? Yeah. How are people getting... I don't want to say people deserve to get burnt takes and then you'll get burnt. Are you kidding me? Yeah. How are people getting burnt? I don't want to say people deserve to get burnt. These people deserve to get burnt. But they're saying it's not until the pain kicks in that you're already burnt. So you can have it on your skin and then you're like, oh, that's getting quite hot, but you're already burnt.

I thought these would be claims from them exploding. No. Because you're meant to get a new one each year, right? That's the idea. Because otherwise the rubber deteriorates. What do you do with the other? No. They explode.

That's what they want you to think. The man's got you the whole water bottle money. They're like $6. Yeah, $6, mate. No, they said some of the severe burns occurred slowly. And people just having all this skin. I thought maybe people rolled over and fell asleep on them. And maybe that's how they're burnt.

But surely your body would wake you up to be like, get off, mate. So just be careful with your hottie. Water bottle. Hot water bottle. Hot water bottle. But also be careful

with hotties. A lot of them can't be trusted. Because they've just had whatever they wanted through their whole life. They can burn you emotionally.

They can. Oh my God. I know. I know what you're saying. That was quite poetic. Can you go to ACC for that? Yeah, I've been burnt by a hottie. A hot water bottle.

No, an attractive person. Made me fall in love with them. A 30-year-old man has taken his parents to court because they want him out of their house. They've had enough. Christina and Mark, this is in America, in New York State. Christina and Mark were like, look, Michael, son,

we love you, but you're 30 years old. You don't have sort of any motivation to do anything. You don't have a job. We just, you've got to leave the house. I saw on the news last night

footage of them in court and they look downtrodden. I know, they look like, it looks like they know that this is their fault. Yeah. They certainly like, I was like, well, they've got themselves to blame and then I saw a photo of them and I'm like, oh my God, they know they've got themselves to

blame. And I've not heard them blame anybody else. And he looks like a real piece of work, eh? Like just a real lazy... Self-entitled little shit. Yeah. Yes, Megan. Not so little shit. Yeah. 30 years old. Didn't he say he

was too busy to look for a job? Yeah. Doing what? God knows. I don't know. So they've written, they wrote him five notices. And it started with, look, you're gonna have to pay rent, hoping that he'd be like, well, if I'm paying, I want to lose some rent. Wait, when did they say you're going to have to start paying rent? When he was 30?

Recently. Recently, when they wanted him out. Then when he failed to pay rent or contribute to the household in any way, it says. So I'm imagining that's tidying dishes, paying for utilities. They said to him, here's your first notice. Four more notices followed. Okay. And then they're like,

you're out. Yep. You're out. You're out of the house. So why did he go to court? He is now suing them because he's saying that they didn't give him

enough time despite the notices that I mentioned before and they never offered him any money to help him get a new house. They're not. Oh, my God. He needs our parents. They would have given him a kick up the ass.

He said he's also busy because he's locked in a legal battle with Best Buy, where he did work once upon a time, who fired him because he didn't want to work Saturdays. Okay. So he's lazy. Wow. And he's taken his want to work Saturdays. Okay. So he's lazy. Wow. And he's taken his parents to court. Wow. And so he's lost that, hasn't he?

That legal battle. So that's why this is in the news. Surprisingly, the judges have sided with the parents and the judge was even like, oh, Michael. Sweet, sweet Michael. A long time ago, my parents wanted my brother out of the house. Like, just get a job or just do something

with your life. This was a while ago when he was a bit useless. And I think they changed the locks at one stage. See, changing the locks is nuts. Now you're like, well, you're homeless. We tried. You literally can't get into this house. You must just be at the end of your tether when you change the locks

on your kid. No, but like, what happens when they're home and he comes over? They just don't let him in. You know how you've got the latches on the window to let the air out but not the burglars in? Yeah. Go away, Scott! Go away! I hope you get this message. My

friend's house has got a little window beside the door that you'd stand at and you'd be like, no, I'm not opening it! You've got to learn! You've got to learn! We told you, My friend's house has got a little window beside the door that you'd stand at. You'd be like, no, I'm not opening it. You've got to learn. You've got to learn. We told you, go away. We would like you now, if this was on Facebook, this would say, tag a mate that needs to move out of home. Yeah.

Because we want to hear about maybe friends of yours or people you know of or heck, probably maybe even siblings. That need to move out of home. That need to move out of home. You can see they out of home. Like you can see they might not be 30 but they're on the road to this happening. They are useless. Now it is it is known

that a lot of people are staying at home longer because it is rent is so expensive and it's hard to save for a house. Anya producer Anya

is back at home but you it's not like you've always lived at home. You've already lived away. You've lived in a different city. Yep.

You've flattered. And now you're back in to save a bit of cash. Yeah. Oh, sorry. She's not saving cash. You know, it's more like directing my purchases in different areas. So rather than things like power, it's more like skirts, shoes, holidays. But it's great.

But you're contributing, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so we pay $140 a week, and that's for food and everything. Each? Yeah. Oh, okay.

That's all right. I was going to say. And will you guys help around the house? I'd say minimally. But yeah. So would people say you need to move out or no? If you ask mum and dad, probably. But no, I don't think so.

I reckon we're all right at the moment. I reckon give it a couple of years and it'll be too much. A couple of years? See, I could go back and live with my parents because every time I go home for the weekend, they nag like, you're using the wrong rubbish bin. Basically, Fletch is experiencing what it would be like to live with himself for a weekend and he doesn't like it.

And I hate it. And he's like, oh, God, these people are true. God, I wish we could clone you and just inflict you upon yourself. No. That would be horrible. He'd end up falling in love. He'd find his soulmate in himself. But would I sleep with myself?

Yes, and what technically is that? That's what another says. It's just playing with yourself, really, in my mind. Oh, my God. It's not gay if it's you. Why did we get here? It's just playing with yourself. It's not gay if it's you.

It's just a new way of... Form of playing with yourself. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Who would be the train in the tunnel? Oh, okay. Well, I don't know. Thankfully, nothing I'm going to have to deal with right now.

Anyway, okay. Who needs to move out of home? 0800-DARLS-IT-M 9696. You can text in as well. Do you think we'll get older than 30? I think a lot of it might not even be age-based. It'll just be mates that just have become

socially inept or just don't function at the age they should be. Like, you know, people in their late 20s who have no idea how to do washing. Well, this brings to mind,

I know, so I don't want to dob these people in, but someone that earns really good money but just lives at home because just is a bit spoiled and can get away with living at home

and so spends all this money on just a lifestyle. Oh, not saving it for a house deposit or anything. But there's a lot of people who aren't allowed to like, they can only move out of home when they get married, you know, for, I don't know, how they brought up or religious reasons. Or like a lot of people who aren't allowed to live with girls. So if they go flatting, they have to find only boys.

Are girls allowed to visit? Not stay. I tell you what would quickly change that mum's mind if she went around and saw the state of an all boys flat. Yeah. Because I've lived in one and it was a hovel. That place needed to be burnt down. Give us a call.

Give us a text. We want to know from you, who needs to move out of home? Who needs to spread their wings and fly, leave the nest? Yeah, a 30-year-old in the US ruled that he has to move out of home by a judge. Some messages in. My mate wouldn't leave home, so his parents moved out. Imagine that, like, we've bought a new house, son.

You're not coming. Does he get a family home or like? I don't know because that does seem like a sweet deal. Yeah. He's. If you're renting,

you just leave it with him and be like, you deal with it now. Yeah, that's your problem now. Get some flatties. Yeah. Somebody said, my son is 29,

still at home. I do everything for him. Cook, clean and everything. Just stop. Just stop. Stop doing everything for him. Don't make it so comfy. Some mums love it. Some mums love it.

Some mums love it. But then you've only got yourself to blame because you're making it so sweet. Rebecca, who should move out of home? Me and my sister, but my parents like having us at home. Do they? Are you sure?

My mum's in the car. They do. Pass her over. Pass her. We need to talk to her about this. She's there. She's listening. car. They do. Pass her over. Pass her. We need to talk to her about this. She's there. She's listening. Mum.

Good morning. Listen to that. She's not. Mum, you like having them around? I do. I do. We're all very, very close, and we do a lot together as a family, and they pay their own way

so it's not like it's coming out of our pockets. Do they help around the house though? Sometimes. They're very good at washing. When it comes to putting washing away, that's a bit different. The old floor truck. Right.

And so if they said, Mum, I'm moving out, would you be a little upset? I'd probably do a happy dance in my head, but, yeah, I would be quite upset, actually, yeah. So would their dad. To warn. Oh, that's pretty good.

And how old are they? How old are they, Mum? Rebecca's 31 and her sister's nearly 27, so... I was expecting early 20s. I wasn't expecting we were in our 30s. Are you also giving her a ride to work? I'm giving her a ride to work. We're carpooling.

Okay, we can almost say this is carpooling. We can. Hey, Rebecca, Mum, thanks for your call. You're welcome. Bye. Bye. Jess, who should move out of home? A guy that I work with who is in his 50s.

And has he ever lived alone or flattered? No, he has never left home. He's still in his high school single bed in mum and dad's house. No. But is something not quite stacking up? Like, is he all legit? No, he's just a really normal guy,

but he's just never left home. He's got siblings who have, you know, moved out and got married and done all the regular things. He just has hung around. But he's never had a relationship? Not that I know of. Oh, I was going to say, or a queen bed because those things are so obvious.

You're a man in your 50s. Upgrade to a queen at least. Yeah. No, no. It's all just as it was about 30 years ago. And does he pay rent at home, do you know, or does he have heaps of money? He's loaded. He is absolutely loaded.

He doesn't pay rent. He doesn't, yeah, he's just living there. And do his parents ever say, you know, maybe you should move out? I've only met his parents a couple of times, and his dad just looks exhausted. Oh, I bet. That is such an awful way to... I hope I've never described it. The man looks like

he's exhausted with life. Jess, thanks for your call. How do you know if it's really Alex? How do you know if it's really her? Yep, straight back in. Oh, just like that. Like a comfortable pair of pants you found

in the wardrobe. With that fallen down? Yep pair of pants you found in the wardrobe. But they'd fallen down? Yep. And when you're towing the wardrobe, you're like, I wonder what happened to these? And you slip straight back into them. Okay. Alex, good morning.

Good morning. All right, so we're going to see now if people listening to ZM know you. So we're going to, hopefully, I know. This is mostly work, eh, this? Yeah. We've had a couple of times where maybe we've only had one or two people. Yeah, but I don't think we've ever had a complete fail, an utter fail. First time for everything, though, Alex.

So we need some details, but not last name. Yeah, so, Alex, whereabouts are you from and how old are you? So I'm 25 and I'm from Auckland. And where do you currently live? Still in Auckland? Yes, yeah. I'm over on the North from Auckland. And where do you currently live? Still in Auckland? Yes, yeah. I'm over on the North Shore. Okay, North Shore.

Have you ever lived anywhere else in New Zealand? I have. I lived in Wellington, but only until I was seven years old. Okay. So it would be stretching to find your kindy cows. We've had primary school people call up. Yeah. So maybe. Okay, Alex.

What school did you go to in Auckland? I went to Takapuna Grammar. Oh! Okay. What a fine institution. How do you know? That's just what you say. Oh, okay.

Right, okay. What do you do for work? So I'm a regional manager and I work in resale. Okay, a regional manager. So you'd kind of get around then. People would know you because you say regional manager, so you'd traverse the Auckland area. Yeah, so I have five stores in Auckland that I care take and look after.

Would I enjoy these stores? I believe so. Oh, okay. Oh, Megan's trying to get in there. Write down Alex's number. Megan's trying to get in there for a discount on something. What sort of thing do you do for fun? What's your hobbies?

I go to the gym five times a week, so I like to keep fit. Okay, what gym do you go to? Oh, that's creepy. No, but people might know her from the gym. From the gym. This is why I'm asking. From the gym. Only if you feel comfortable saying what gym you go to.

Oh, yeah, fair enough. You don't have to answer. Well, I go to F45 and Newmarket in the morning. Oh, Christ. They're going to be cult-like. Oh, what? We're still on air. Hello.

You can't then judge her on what gym she goes to. No, I know. How do you know that someone does F45? They'll tell you about it. You asked her. Oh, yeah're true. You're good. I did.

Okay, no, that's good because a lot of people do that and so they could know you. This is good. Okay. What else do we need to ask? Do you have any brothers or sisters? I do. I have two older brothers.

Okay. Both of whom are quite well known in Auckland. So, yeah, hopefully someone called. Two older brothers. For. Both of whom are quite well known in Auckland and so yeah, hopefully someone called. Two older brothers. Good reasons they're known or are they like skelly wags, well known skelly wags? No, good reasons. Is it because they're hot? Are they hot?

Are they single? I'm just, I'm asking for a friend. Caitlin. Pointing at Caitlin. Stop being a creep, Caitlin. I love it. No, both are married. I'm sure Caitlin would be first in line, for sure. Caitlin's like, great. Okay.

How's that? Is it enough? So now we need to know if people listening know Alex. Know Alex. It's easy. You ring us. Surely. 0800.ZM.

Text 9696. How do you know Alex? Okay. Good morning, Grace. How are you? Hello. I'm good. How are you? Good. Now, do you know Alex okay good morning Grace how are you hello I'm good how are you good now do you know Alex

I sure do how do you know Alex we are friends we went to school together so you went to take a grammar yeah oh Grace

how are you hello oh well hello hello hello girl when is the last time you two spoke? I think you maybe commented on my Instagram photo,

and that's about it. That counts as speaking. Yeah, that's pretty much, that's a millennial chat. That's catching up. Yeah, yeah. That's a millennial coffee, really, isn't it? Yeah. That's great.

I think the last time I saw Grace, we had free tea at Takapuna Beach Cafe, so there you go. Yes. There was that one time I was in your store, and then that kid weed himself. Hot memory.

I like this a lot. That's what I remember. I had to go and clean up weeds. Oh, yeah. Great show. Fantastic. I'm like Thursday.

Well, she knows it. I tell you what, that means we get to play the music, doesn't it? Yeah. That's how you know that it's really Alex. That's how you know that it's really her. Man, we're on key today, my girls.

Fletch isn't really. He dips out. Oh, I have to press the button, so I'm distracted by the singing. I can't sing and press buttons. Amanda, good morning. Good morning. Kat, do you know Alex? I absolutely know Alex.

I know that voice from anywhere. You guys are naughty. This is trouble. This is the dynamic duo. How do you know that voice from anywhere? I actually know Alex through working in the same business as her, but in another city. So we talk on the phone all the time.

Are we allowed to find out what this retail place is now? If we're allowed to say. Because that's how she knows it. So technically that's it, eh? That's the reveal? Right, yeah. But they might not want to say, because you've got a kid wearing the store.

Kids wear in stores everywhere. Where do you work? We work at North Beach. Okay, right. Okay. Oh, kids love doing a win. Okay, right. Okay. Oh, kids love it in a win. Right place for a win. I guess we get to sing the song again then, don't we?

That's how you know that it's really Alex. That's how you know that it's really her. Thank you, Amanda. Maggie's called in. Morning, Maggie. Hi, how's it going? Good. How do you know Alex?

Me and Alex went to school together and we were good friends. We're good friends. Oh, well, we are good friends. I just haven't seen him for a long time. Oh, okay. Nah. What happened? Hey, Maggie.

Hey, Alex. How are you? I'm so good, girl. This is the most Takapuna segment we've ever done, by the way. Sure, girls. Sure, girls'm so good, girl. This is the most tack-a-pooner segment we've ever done, by the way. Your girls. Your girls. What up, girl?

Oh, how are you, girl? Still driving your mum's old BMW? You know it, girl. Yeah. Oh, so good. Let's hit up Toto's. Okay. Okay.

We're too young for Toto's. Oh, you're too young? I don't even know what Toto's is. Yeah, I don't know. It's been a while since we've been on the shore. It was the mid-2000s the last time I went out on the shore and I got asked not to come back, so that's fine.

Well, I guess we get to sing the song then, don't we? Yeah, let's go. That's how you know that it's really Alex. That's how you know that it's really her. All right, okay. We've got more people saying they know you, Alex. Jayab, how do you know Alex? Oh, good morning, guys.

Well, hey, look, it sounds like Alex is a very, very popular girl. And I had the pleasure of dating her once. You are currently dating her? I am currently dating her. We're about three years in. And is there something you'd like to ask her live on the radio right now? Shut up, you guys.

Don't put that pressure. Imagine if this is just a giant bloody proposal ruse. Oh, wouldn't that be elaborate? Alex is like, it better not be. Oh, God. I'll be the talk of the Takapuna Facebook page if this happens.

You know what, you guys, if I tried to propose, it would have been probably naked and all sorts of crazy shit would have happened. Yeah, that's right. It's on the radio. Yeah, very true. So, Alex, you can confirm this is your boyfriend? Yes, I just saw him about half an hour at the gym. Hi, babe.

All right, so he's not in the same car or house or anything right now. No, no, no. Oh, good, good. Oh, cute. Do you guys gym together? Yeah. You don't do those weird, like, couple push-ups, though, or anything, do you? No, no.

We just work out together and spend some time in the morning. What's a couple push-up? The way you do the pull-ups and you kiss at the top of the bar. I tried to do it with this guy at the gym the other day. He wasn't into it. I was like, bro, do you want to be an Instagram hit or not Let's do this That's how you know

That it's really Alex That's how you know That it's really her Should we do one more or is that it Why not No We're not going to do one more because they hung up. Alex, thank you so much for playing, and you are very well connected.

Oh, thank you. Warm fuzzies all round. You don't get anything from this apart from warm fuzzies. Yeah. That's great. It's worth it. It's great. It's been a while since we played this I Like This game.

Yeah. You didn't like this game, but now I've come around. I want to do it more. That's good. I like it. I like this game, but now I've come around. I want to do it more. That's good. I like it. I like it. Thanks, Alex. Thanks, Alex.

Oh, yeah. And by the way, if you're thinking that they are a good-looking couple, Caitlin's just sent us a photo of them together on holiday. How creep! I'm sorry that Caitlin's been stalking you, Alex. That's so much fun. Oh, my God. You guys are attractive.

We're not even turning a microphone. I know. Bugger them, hey? Alex! Alex, I was not stalking your Facebook. You're not supposed to tell them that I like stalked her. I found her last name and stalked her on Facebook. Good Lord, that's funny.

Are your brothers that attractive? Because, man. You're such a creep, Caitlin. I mean, their wives might be angry at them now. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is there is an octopus where the female octopus is 4,000 times the size of the male of the same species of octopus.

4,000 times? 4,000 times. It's called the blanket the same species of octopus. 4,000 times? 4,000 times. It's called a blanket octopus. I've got a little photo here I can show you of a blanket octopus. So it's like an octopus, but it's wearing a superhero cape. Oh, it literally looks like it's got a nana's knitted blanket. Yeah, he's like, he's towing a, she's towing a blanket. That's a she, you know that because the male is tiny.

Okay. So this, to put this into human terms, this would be the equivalent of a 55 kg woman with a husband who weighed 1.5 grams. Wow. That's a tiny little speck of dust. Yeah. That's ridiculous. A blueberry.

Like that's what a quarter of a teaspoon of something? Yeah. It's tiny. It's not much at all. Like a raisin.

Yeah. Like the size of a raisin. Yeah. So you're a 55 kid you're a woman but your man's a raisin. Okay. And size wise

it would be a woman being 2.15 metres tall Yeah Which is very very tall Very very very very tall It's like Brienne of Tarth Yes

But taller Taller again I think Okay 2.15 metres tall With a man who is 2.2 centimetres tall Whoa He's crazy

He's that big But like what do you do with that? How do they Do they breed by accident? So it's It's quite something. I was going to say, like, does she have to accidentally sit on him? No, so what?

No, I was just doing gestures with my hands. Go, do your gestures again. Yeah, he pretty much does crawl up inside her, Megan. That's what happens. If that's what you were indicating. Yeah, it was. So he serves little to no purpose, apart from holding just a tiny, tiny amount of reproductive seed.

Yep. And he kind of like lives on her and then just scoots up. I've seen a diagram of the two of them. Is that the one that compares the six foot to the dot? Yeah. It's like when the spaceship goes into the bigger spaceship on those movies. Much, much bigger spaceship. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Much, much bigger spaceship. Okay. But there's other, and they've looked into why this happens, how in the same species the female has grown so much larger than the male, and the male just does not need to be bigger. It's kind of evolved to the point where the male doesn't need to be bigger. It's got no... And the bigger males didn't make better breeding partners. Like in humans, the bigger male throughout time has been a better protector and a better hunter and a gatherer due to

their size and strength. So we've become bigger over time. But for them, the size of the male served no purpose. So he just got smaller and smaller and smaller, and they got bigger and bigger and bigger. And that's how the blanket octopus is now 4,000 times the size of its male counterpart. There's other ones that do it as well. There's flies, there's anglerfish, and there's some spiders that are significantly bigger. Right.

Females. So today's fact of the day is the female blanket octopus is 4,000 times the size of her mate. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Jamie Oliver, who still looks the same as he did when he first popped up on TV screens all those years ago, has revealed one aspect of his beauty treatment, his secrets. Okay. Olive oil. When he's in the kitchen, I guess if he's making a sort of a salad, he'll give it a zhoosh and then give himself a zhoosh.

Well, he puts it on himself. I thought you meant he'd eat a lot of it. Oh, he eats a lot of it. But he actually rubs it on his skin. Yeah, a bit of an application in troubled spots. Because that's why they say the Italians live long and the Mediterranean diet's good.

It's got the olive oil. It's good saturated fat. Right. Good for your skin. Do you put it on your face, though? Because I remember when everybody was getting into coconut oil, some people swear by putting that on your skin. Well, it made hair healthier too.

When people were putting coconut oil in their hair, they'd give it... Right, yeah. Maybe not the desired slick look, but it would condition it. But then I read it was bad because it would clog your pores. Yeah, I kind of thought cooking oils were a bit heavy. Margarine?

Margarine. So I get a little bit of baking paper out of the drawer that you keep your baking paper, your gladiator wrap and your tinfoil in. And I pull that off and I rub it on the top of the marginal. It's just all over. That's a good mask. Yes, leave it on for 20 minutes and then cold

wash it off. Takes a long time, but you can really feel it working out everything there. Because people use, I guess, your more traditional oils. Don't they? Like your rose hips back at the moment? What is a rose hip from? A rose, the hip of the rose. Yeah, because that's to me what I thought. Rose don't have hips.

No, I don't know. I actually don't know. That's a good point. Everyone just sees rose hip oils. Yeah, I don't know. I actually don't know. That's a good point. Everyone just sees Rose hip oil. Yeah, I know. Because lately it's... I remember mum had Rose hip oil growing up and then never heard of it.

And then lately Sade's been talking about Rose hip oil again. So I was like, oh. She'd hit up Christine. She's probably still got something in the 80s. So Rose hip seed oil is a pressed seed oil extracted from the seeds of the wild rose bush. Oh, okay. In the southern Andes.

Everything great is from South America. Right. Drugs, oil, hot people. Because I just looked up if olive oil was actually... Food, food. Epinatus. Epinatus. And apparently olive oil is good.

It penetrates deep into the skin, so it doesn't clog your pores, and it has antibacterialial and it's cleansing. And if you need to grease a tray before you make some muffins, just rub your face on it. Rub your face. Right. So maybe he is onto something. Okay.

Can we take some calls? Does anybody have like a really odd kind of unusual beauty regime or a beauty tip that users say something from the kitchen? Like tea bags on my own lives. Is that one? Does everyone do that? Tea bags. Tea bags.

Do you let them go cold first? Yeah. This is going to get good. You'll burn yourself otherwise. No, cold tea bags. And have you used them? Yeah. So you have a cup of tea.

You make a cup of tea for you and Mr. Toyboy. Yeah. But what does it do? Well, it's, like, antibacterial and it, like, helps with the bags under your eyes and stuff. The magic of tea. If you ever have a sore eye, swear to you, put a used tea bag on it. And it will...

Make it feel better. Yeah. What kind of sore eye? Like an oncoming stye situation. Yeah. It might remedy that. Okay. Well, maybe like Jamie Oliver, you're using a cooking oil on your skin, but have you got

an unusual beauty regime or a beauty tip with something every day? Yeah. Like, share these with us. Every day but not everyday beauty, eh? Like, outside of the realms of beauty products. Yeah. Not the stuff you buy in the beauty. Maybe you got it off Nana.

Maybe Nana's were always full of these. Yeah. Talking about your non-traditional beauty tips. So, yeah. Jamie Oliver uses olive oil on his skin. Nannies were always full of these. Yeah. Talking about your non-traditional beauty tips. So, yeah. Jamie Oliver uses olive oil on his skin. That's his, like, anti-wrinkle cream. I don't know about that, but he seems to swear by it.

Boy, he looks youthful. You can't deny that. He looks great. And then some people just have better genes for that, I feel. Yeah. And then so then people are like, oh, we'll do what they're doing. But then they age real quick and everyone's worried about them. Yeah. You know, when like...

You can't win. When he ages, it might be really quick. Yeah. Ella, what's your non-traditional beauty tip? I use egg whites and a little bit of lime or lemon in it. And then I'll use, you know, the Klanix tissue? Yeah. And then I'll put them together on my nose or on my other parts of my face that have blackheads

and then wait for it to dry in and pull it off. Do you know, my mum, when cracking eggs, she puts her fingers in and gets the rest of the egg whites and rubs it on her face. Yes, it's amazing. Seriously, try it. Weird, eh? What?

So if you... It's like a meringue. Yeah, yeah. So when it dries, you pull the tissue and it's all dry and the blackheads stick to the tissue. That's right, yeah. And so that's the egg white's job, to dry and go a bit crusty and pull off.

It's on the tissue. What does the lemon juice do? It's just to get rid of the egg smell, really. It's more of a nature's cleaner. Nature's spray and wipe, isn't it? Lemon. Ella, brilliant. Thank you. Jabbar, what's spray and wipe, isn't it? Lemon. Ella, brilliant. Thank you.

Jabbar, what's your non-traditional beauty tip? Well, it is using Malibu instead of aftershave. Malibu, the alcohol. Yeah. The coconut rum. Yep. Okay, two questions. Doesn't it hurt because it's alcohol?

And secondly, don't you go sticky? Okay, so yeah. Okay, so first the hurt part, well, all aftershave hurts I guess because it's got alcohol in it. Yeah, right, okay. Which is good, I think it's good anyway. Okay. But the sticky part is just get

some warm water, but don't like rub it, but just splash it on and that'll just take the stickyness off. And then you smell like delicious coconut. Yeah, you smell like the coconut and it's nice and smooth. Yeah, I'd be into that. We're like... Get some Midori on your back, Will.

It's a cocktail. Get a Kahlua face mask. I'll be all over you. Javon cocktail. Hey, Javon, thanks for your call. Paris, what's your non-traditional beauty treatment? Hi, so I actually use apple cider vinegar on my face and on my hair. Apple cider vinegar is very versatile, isn't it?

Yeah, and I also take it every morning. Yeah, a lot of people do that, although dentists don't like it, do they? No, dentists don't. No, no, no. I still have to dilute it, yeah. Why is it? Because of its acidity. Yeah. It burns your teeth a bit. Yeah, it burns, yeah. What good does still have to dilute it, yeah. Why does it, because of its acidity? Yeah. Yeah, it melts your teeth a bit.

Yeah, it sort of burns, yeah. What good does it do to the face and hair? It actually rids oil and prevents oil because I have a super oily face. Right. So, yeah, it's super good at that. And it also put egg in my hair just to keep it shiny, so. Yeah, you often hear people doing that, cracking egg on your head. Do you know, I've got a tip, because I've used a bit of apple cider vinegar in my time.

The tip is to get the actual legit stuff, because a lot of the stuff in supermarkets, the cheap stuff, isn't apple cider vinegar. It's what's other vinegar flavored or something. It's not. Yeah. That's cheating. It's cheating, yeah. It's like when you buy maple flavored syrup, but flavored's written really small.

I know. But you can get supplements now, so you don't have to drink it and destroy your teeth. Thanks, Paris. Somebody said, some text messages in, they wanted to add to the homemade face scrub with coffee and coconut oil, get some baking soda in there as well. I thought you were going to say bacon. Or smash up some oats. Oats are really good for it.

I really want to try this. But how long does it keep? Does it go off? Oh, no, you have to make it on a case by case. Small batches. Okay, all right. I know you're a production line guy, but small batch. I'm economies of scale.

I'm economies of scale. Yeah. Somebody said, my great nana, while I haven't tried it, I saw it and it always seemed to be working, used to use pig lard on her face at night. Every night she'd put pig fat on her face. Maybe shortening from a pork roast, she'd keep the fat. And when she died in her 80s, people always thought she was in her 50s.

No wrinkles. Straight up fat. Straight up pig lard. Does that get into your pores? It would clog your pores. You'd get pimples. But wouldn't you absorb the fat? Maybe it doesn't

oh okay I don't know interesting it's gonna need a google ZDM's Fletch Vaughn and Megan

the podcast for more catch them every weekday from six ZDM