ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - November 01 2018

Episode Date: October 31, 2018

Megan was so jazzed about Halloween yesterday, How Do You Know and weird reasons you support a sports team.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello and welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. Thanks to Spark. Get more of what you love on the $29 prepaid rollover pack. And now, on with the show. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. You ran into some of the international media. Yeah, I slipped over in front of them.

They were all getting on a bus at Sky City. Yeah, because I know that all the New Zealand media is frothing. Yeah, they were frothing. But there's so many UK press here. Well, there was three big buses, and it looked to be all dedicated to press. And I'd just been for a fritter on the pokies, and I came running out out and my jandals hit the wet tiles

and down I went. What actually fell down? Embarrassing like sideways as well because I was kind of turning a corner. Down I went. In a summer rain? No but none of them took photos though. That's good. Well you're not Prince Harry or Meghan Markle. No. He fell over

in his jandals. Is he allowed to wear jandals in public? I don't know. Would he be allowed to wear them? What if they went to the beach? He'd wear like a sand shoe. Ooh, yes. Or like a sandal. He'd get sand in his shoes.

No, he'd probably do like a Birkenstock. Yeah. That'd be allowed, wouldn't it? A fancy Birkenstock. A fancy sandal. Yeah. Ooh la la. On my way to work this morning,

5am, walking down Queen Street, downtown Auckland, I saw a drunk Roderick McDonald, several skeletons, and a Pirates of the... What is it? Johnny Depp, what's his character? Captain Jack Sparrow. Yeah, sorry, Captain Jack.

And just multiple ghouls and ghosts. They're rebooting that series. That was news this week. Yeah, they're rebooting Pirates of the Caribbean Caribbean and doing it without him. Do we need that? More pirates. No.

Did really well for them. Yeah, true. Probably a lot to do with the character he played there. That ride is rubbish. Oh, yeah, because you know the movies are based on the ride, eh? Yeah. The ride's just like go for a saunter through a cave with treasure and a few pirates. Yeah.

And then it finishes. It's boring. It's like a log flim with people with heart conditions. Yeah. Like no... They need to give it a zhoosh. Yeah, they need to put some jets in there and power that boat along a little bit. Yeah.

All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. Story time, three news stories. I've got three headlines. Vaughan and Megan pick one. That's how it works, story time, every morning. Yeah. Doesn't change, does it?

Yeah. It's tried and true, tried and tested, trusted. It's one of the most trusted brands. Well, it's tried. I don't know if you can say it's trusted. Headline one, man costs company. Man costs company? Yeah.

It sounded like you said tumpany. Man costs company. Okay. Costs company. Man costs. I was like, what's a tumpany? I thought it was a tumpany. A tumpany.

Why, it's starting a little tumpany. I want to make some money for my family. I'm starting... A tumpany. A tumpany. Why, it's starting a little tumpany. A tumpany. I want to make some money for my family. I'm starting a little tumpany. Headline two, Columbia nuns newfound fame. And headline three, smoking cow stops motorists. Is the cow having a durry or is it on fire?

It involves a durry. Really? Does it? Yeah. Cow having a smoke. It's a durry. Really? Does it? Yeah. They were having a smoke. It's a bit of a sad story to be honest. Oh, I'll avoid that.

I think someone's taking advantage of a cow. It's World Vegan Day. Oh, is it? Okay, well let's not go there today then if it's World Vegan Day. I'm going to celebrate by having a vegan

raw slice later. That is the one good thing vegans will do. A raw slice. I was going to say bacon and eggs. They'll charge you $18 for that slice. Sometimes, you know, it's worth it. Yeah. That's the one good thing vegans will do, a raw slice. I thought you were going to say bacon and eggs. They'll charge you $18 for that slice.

Sometimes, you know, it's worth it. Yeah. That's the one thing I like. I'm not particularly keen on the main meals, but I love a vegan raw slice. Oh, the raw slices. They're so expensive, though, because that costs so much to make. Oh, yeah, well, it's full of not meat. Yeah.

And not animal products. So those things don't come cheap. What was number one again? I forgot. Man costs tumpany. Man costs tumpany. I did say tumpany incorrectly on purpose. Man costs tumpany. Or Colombian nuns, newfound fame.

I know Colombian nuns, newfound fame. And I kind of want to hear about the tumpany. I'll tell you, this nun became a porn star. Oh, really? Well, webcam girl. I think that's like the step before porn star. Oh, really? Well, it's a big jump. Webcam girl. I think that's like the step before porn star

because that's mostly just from what I'm told. You've got to be found somehow, don't you? Yeah, yeah. It's like when you do your acoustics on YouTube before you get big.

And you upload them and you have a record coming to spots. Yeah, it's a lot like that. You do your acoustics. It's exactly the same. You do your covers of Ed Sheeran and hope that someone from Universal Music finds you.

Yeah, and you do requests. Someone's like, can you play Ed Sheeran's Shape of You? That's what they'd say to a person who was live streaming their music and the request of webcam girls is slightly different. Only slightly.

Slightly different, but you play to the crowd. Yep. Give them what they want. And I hope to hit the big time. So we don't need to talk about it again. So story number one. Story number one.

That's Tampere. Okay. All right. We go to Tokyo now. And an attendant at a popular garden in the heart of Tokyo has cost the facility millions of yen. All because he was too frightened to ask visitors to pay to enter.

Oh. Now, the attendant, who's in his early 70s, has admitted failing to collect the fees for the Shinjuku Gion National Garden after an investigation was launched following a tip-off by another employee. What was the tip-off? We've got no money. Why haven't we got any money? Well, no one's been paying to come in. Who's responsible? Ticket guy. The unnamed

man has since retired. He reportedly had stopped collecting admission fees of 200 yen, which is about nearly $3. Yeah, I was going to say, not much. And 50 yen for children. He stopped in April 2014

and had continued to allow foreign visitors in free of charge for about two and a half years. Now, it's estimated 160,000 people entered the garden. Free? Free, yes. Free Free Yes And they'd lost About Close to 350

400 Thousand New Zealand dollars Wow As a result of this Oh he didn't have Very successful Company

Local reports On the news Said that the man Had told investigators That being yelled at By a non-Japanese Visitor years ago Had made him

Wary of overseas Guests Oh And he Was going to want To be yelled at by a non-Japanese visitor years ago had made him wary of overseas guests. Oh, I didn't want to be yelled at again. He said, I don't speak any other languages and I got scared when a foreigner began yelling at me a long time ago. So he just, it was like too hard basket. They go in for free. I'll just charge the locals. Oh, poor guy.

It should be the other way around. The locals should have been getting in for free. And then I charge the locals. Oh, poor guy. It should be the other way around. Yeah. The locals should have been getting in for free. And then I think someone working with him was like, probably like, this old mate is just useless. Yeah. I've got to do something about this. Oh. Yeah. Poor guy. Just trying to be part of a company. So apparently he

was docked 10% of his salary and asked to take retirement and offered to return half of his retirement bonus. No, keep your... No, I won't hear of it. I won't hear of it. I'm unsure if he gave the retirement bonus back, but yeah. I hope he didn't. I hope he kept it.

Well, we can only hope. Australians, predominantly, and also people with a taste when it comes to a yeasty spread, are a little bit outraged as Vegemite has been admitted to Sweden's Disgusting Food Museum. I didn't even know they had a Disgusting Food Museum. Right. But musk sticks are in there as well,

and they, along with Vegemite, are considered one of the disgusting musk sticks. What are the musk sticks? I've never known the name for them. They're those little lollies. Oh, they taste like smokers. Yeah, I think they're like a couple of inches long. There's a picture of them here

if you know how they've ever been described. Oh, yeah, they're multicoloured, sometimes pink. Yeah, and they're kind of like star-shaped, but they look like they've been squeezed

through a pasta maker, but they're actually a lolly. Yep. In like a specific shape. They have also been added, which is upset Australians. Apparently they're quite fond of the musk stick. But it's in Sweden, and he said, the guy who puts it together, he's a Swedish chef, but not the one from the Muppets.

Because in your mind, the minute I said Swedish chef, you're probably like,'s a curator of it loves travelling the world loves trying all the like local foods that are unavailable in certain countries and you see

when he was in Australia he tasted Vegemite and he was like but is it just on one man so he's the only one and he tries it he's like

yeah I'm taking this home and then he takes it home I don't know if he's the only one and he tries it. He's like, oh, yeah. Yeah, he's like, I'm taking this home. And then he takes it home. I don't know if he lets people have a little toothpick taste in this museum. Yeah, right. Another thing in there that he said he actually doesn't mind the taste of, but one thing many people are disgusted by is blood supper, which is literally blood soup. And you have to use a goose's blood, only a goose's blood,

thickened by simmering for quite some time, and then flavoured with cognac and spices. Ooh, yum. I've just Googled disgusting food museum. They have roasted guinea pigs from Peru, fermented herring from Sweden. See, I would try a roasted guinea pigs from Peru Fermented herring from Sweden See, I would try a roasted guinea pig Because the Peruvians have eaten guinea pigs For a very, very long time

And I imagine it's like, I don't know, chicken Isn't everything like chicken? Everything would be like chicken Maggot infested cheese from Sardinia Pungent bean curd from China That stinky tofu For a happy vegan day, by the way Well aged shark from Iceland Oh no Bean curd from China. That's stinky tofu. Yeah. For a happy vegan day, by the way. Yeah, happy vegan day.

Well-aged shark from Iceland. Oh, no. That's not vegan. What's that stinky fruit from Thailand? Durian. Durian. That's disgusting. You don't even know how to eat that on public transport.

It actually tastes gross, too. Durian. Oh, I didn't know. Maybe it was just because I was expecting it to taste so bad because of the smell. Right. But I didn't actually think durian was too bad. And now Vegemite, add that to the list. Vegemite doesn't, compared to that list, doesn't sound too bad.

The fermented shark from Finland is one of those things where apparently, unless you've been eating it from when you were a kid, you just wouldn't be able to stomach it. You wouldn't do it. The smell of it alone will make you gag before it even gets to your mouth. So if you're tucking into some Vegemite on toast, you're tucking pretty much into the Australasian equivalent of fermented shark or stinky tofu.

A story from The Guardian. Now, this is one of Britain's biggest news websites. To access this story, I had to watch a 15-second ad. How's that? After you'd read it, did you get a wee thing being like, hey, do you want to donate to us? Yeah. Do you want to donate?

And I was like, nah. Sounds like something someone in Britain should have to do. Plus, I didn't read the whole thing. Actually, Megan, you're right. For anyone who reads this, for as little as one New Zealand dollar, you can support The Guardian. Only takes a minute. Thank you.

Didn't get that far because, classically, I only read the first few paragraphs of the story. Journalists are dying. Yeah, it's sad. What of? Hunger. Hunger and boredom. Because they didn't get the dollar.

Yeah. Bloody hell. So you might want to reconsider that. Okay. Yeah. Journalism is dying, I think is what you meant. Not journalists. No, they are dying too.

Without diversifying. Yeah. And writing clickbait headlines. Stay alive. So this is a story about, and this is a real great timing of the story because I've just decided over the last couple of weeks that my future is wholeheartedly anchored in avocados. Oh, my God.

Since growing my little stones. You went in the car with them. I can imagine. Driving to Tauranga. God, I didn't know avocado trees were this big. Look at them all. Oh, my God. I know because as soon as we got there, it's like, you won't believe how many avocado trees

Look at all these photos I took out the window of all the avocado trees on the drive down there. Look at that. Look at that. Look at that. That's an end. Look at that. I'm surprised he didn't stop to get a wee clipping.

Well, I wasn't allowed. That's why he's driving. He's driving and taking these photos. No, no, I wasn't. This was on the way down. I was in the back seat. Oh, okay. What are you?

I know, and you know I don't do back seats because I get car sick. We get car sick. So I had to keep my head up, and that's why I was noticing all the avocado trees. But it's like, Katty Katty's just got so many avocado trees. Look at those. More, more, more avocado trees. All flowering at the moment. I've learned a lot about avocado trees lately.

Oh, God. But then this story popped up, and I was like, like Heck If I'm going to get into this Avocado business Yeah And have my own Successful orchard one day I might need to hire Some mercenaries

You're too lazy To have an avocado orchard Or any kind of orchard No Orcharding is perfect for me Just potter around Mow between them The trees do all the work

No I'm going to get Somebody else to get through that Oh right okay I was going to say Well they to do that. Oh, right. Okay. I was going to say. Well, they're ages. I'll probably be retired. I can't go up to Cherry Picker. What if I fell out?

I'd never recover. I'd be paralyzed, sitting on my deck, ushering instructions from a wheelchair. Like Charles Xavier in The X-Men, except no mental powers. So this story that made headlines in Britain is that pretty much avocado growers in New Zealand are experiencing theft at such a level that they're making homemade booby traps,

electric fences and having armed patrols. How do you make a homemade electric fence? I'd make the voltage too high and then find all these dead bodies on my lawn. Whoopsies. It's their fault though, isn't it? For wandering on. Bury them in the drip line of the avocado tree and they'll fertilise. Blood and bone.

Yeah. Circle of life. Perfect crime. Yeah, and then if the sniffer dogs come in, just chuck them a couple of avocados. I love that. Can dogs eat avocado? Some reason is I said that I thought maybe not. I don't know.

Maybe. Yeah, but so yeah, there's some homemade booby traps with trip wires. There's electric fences around them, but you can see them all from the road. So this is... As my photos prove, so I can see why. So this is on a UK news feed. This is how the world sees New Zealand. Pretty rad, eh?

We've got these little avocado orchards and we're booby trapping them because we love our avocados. God, we must look like a weird country, eh? It's like when gangs used to grow weed in the middle of people's maize crops.

Oh, yeah. I don't know if you guys know this. No. Rurally growing up. If you grow a maize crop, you have to be careful. Oh, because gangs would go in. They'd go in and cut out

a bit in the middle and start growing weed because the maize disguised it. Yeah, right. And they'd take about the same time to mature. Okay. But they'd put like the same time to mature. Okay. But they'd put like razor wires and stuff in there to stop people going in.

Yeah, well, my granddad once, when he was harvesting his maize, the guy stopped the harvester and was like, we've got a weed patch over here. What should we do? And my granddad said, oh, you can take that if you want. And they were like, thank you. And then they just took it and left. Oh, no, no, no.

They finished doing the job. Right. But they like cut it all off just took it and left. Oh, no, no, no. They finished doing the job. Right. But they, like, cut it all off at the bottom and everything. Well, you don't want it in your feed because then your cows get buzzed. Yeah, yeah. That's true. Right. But then it might be medicinal marijuana meat.

They've kind of, like, cured themselves. Yeah, that could be a new flavour of primo. That's what I was thinking. Can you get marijuana milk if they eat it? Oh, yeah, probably. Well, I don't know, actually. That's what I was thinking. Can you get marijuana milk if they eat it? Oh, yeah, probably. Well, I don't know, actually. I can't speak for that. But yeah, avocados have reached that sort of level in New Zealand now.

And it's going worldwide. Yeah. We're down here fighting over avocados. FVM, the podcast. Lime scooter riders. Yes, more. You got a panic story? Yes.

Thought we were due for another one of these. Why is it that a, you got a panic story? Yes. Thought we were due for another one of these. Why is it that people love a lime scooter panic story? Because they want it, it's fun, they want it shut down. But it makes me so angry. Like people are falling off bikes every day. People are hurting themselves at work. Ladders are

bloody dangerous. Ban work. I agree that maybe there needs to be some safety measures because someone like, if you can ride a bike with a helmet, then you should be banning yourself. I agree that maybe there needs to be some safety measures because someone like, well, if you can ride a bike with a helmet, then you should be adding a helmet. I'm going on one today. I've got an appointment. An appointment downtown.

Are you going to get one? Definitely getting one. See, I like to think I'm pretty conscientious. Yeah. But I see some people like literally honing down the street, weaving in and out of people. If you know you're going to be a crazy person on it, then you should wear some safety gear.

But then you're never going to get them to, are you? No. Because then you have to carry a helmet with you. You have to carry a helmet, yeah. Yeah. So the latest panic story

in the Sadie Brown shock yesterday is that Lime in America, so it's the same company, they have electric scooters as well. Because have you seen, have you got your credit card,

Bill? No. Because I use it on my phone. It just goes through the Apple Pay, so the credit card is connected to No. Because I use it on my phone. It just goes through the Apple Pay, so the credit card connected to my phone. Oh, yeah. When I pay for it. Yeah.

And Shade was like, what are all these? And it was like all of these weird amounts to a San Francisco-based company not called Lime Scooters. Oh, yeah, that looks like a dodgy website, doesn't it? She's like, what is this? And I could totally tell she thought I was like doing some sort of pay prescription situation on the internet.

And I was like, I don't know. And so we Googled the company. Yeah. And it took a little while to work out that they're the overall company that owns Lime.

Lime scooters. It's so annoying when places do that. I know. Because obviously when I do online shopping, the overarching companies sometimes change names and you're like, I have no idea what this is.

And then you freak out, eh? You're like, oh God, I've been scammed. Neutron Holdings. Yeah, Neutron Holdings. That's what it was. That doesn't sound like a porn company, but that's what they do.

That's what, yes. If I was a porn company, I wouldn't be called Porn Company. LTD. Yeah. Although I would be. Car parts. Or Garden Centre.

IT. Don't worry about it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Don't look too much into this company. So Lime in America had a wee whoopsies with some of their batteries. They had the potential to catch fire. So they had to do a little wee recall.

They have said that it's not the same, there's not the same concern about our Lime scooters in New Zealand. But yeah, they had to do a recall of about 2,000 scooters, which in the scheme of things in America, how many thousands would they have? I read people in California are selling Lime because they've fallen off and hurt themselves. America, right? America.

What do you expect? Yeah. Yeah, so there's no need for panic. But they'll keep trying. Because I'm seriously considering buying one. Just wait, because it's just need for panic. But they'll keep trying. Because I'm seriously considering buying one. Just wait because it's just a fad. No, I'm waiting because I want to see if they make some laws or ban them. Because I don't want to buy one.

No, don't wait. It's like when I bought the drone. I know the good times aren't going to last forever so you've got to enjoy it while you can. That's true. Yeah, but dropping like $800 on an electric scooter, that's like... And I feel like you'll get over it. It could be like a month.

You'll be like zipping around for a couple of weeks and then you'll be like... I dropped over $1,000 on a drone and I didn't know how long I've got. I still don't know how long I've got. Could be any day now. You've just got to buy these things. Am I right, Megan? Yeah. Amen, sister.

That's Paul's purchase on big, ridiculous items. Amen. All right. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. It's beginning to, oops. This might sound like the start of it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, but it's not. 53 days away from Christmas.

Now that Halloween's out of the way, visually, you know, Halloween has a visual presence, a presence, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. Pumpkins, witches, ghouls. Especially in supermarkets, it's Halloween. Yeah. Treats and... Sexy versions of scary things.

But now that that's done, visually, everyone's going to be prepping and selling Christmas stuff. Yes. So this is generally where we look to be hitting 100% Christmas penetration. But I've got the top six things we've still got to celebrate before Christmas. So these are some things that you could celebrate. I actually can't think of anything. I had no idea. Okay.

I've done some research. Okay. Number six on today's top six things we've still got to celebrate before Christmas. World Toilet Day. Oh, okay. November the 19th is when we celebrate that. You might be thinking that's a bit silly, Vaughan, but it is actually to raise awareness of the billions of people

that live around the world without proper sanitary. Oh, that's... Just to take appreciation when going to the toilet. Like, do you remember when Caitlin couldn't find a toilet in Kenya? She'd go on the side of... Oh, I thought you were meaning in Tahuna on the way to Tauranga. Oh, yeah. Oh, that too. That too.

Yeah, but you've been to a few countries, Caitlin, where sanitation, we went to Cambodia and saw. Oh, that was pretty grim in some areas. What that was like. But, you know, there are billions of people around the world without proper sanitation and access to toilets. Oh, yeah. It's horrible.

Yeah. Yeah. So you can appreciate World Toilet Day. I really do appreciate it. Thank you. How do we celebrate that day? Just go. Just go, I think, yeah.

Just pose and take a bit of time to think what it would be like if you were having to do that in a hole you just dug with your hands. Sometimes I do say thank you to the toilet because it's got the worst job in the world. It's so convenient. Poor wee thing. Yeah, I know. Oof. The things it's seen.

Yeah. Top six things we've still got to celebrate before Christmas number five on November the 12th, Ryan Gosling's birthday. Oh, brilliant. I actually didn't, as part of my research, find out how old he is going to be. Should we guess?

37. He'd be like 35. He'll be 38 this year. He's currently 37. Looking good for that. Still in his 30s. 38. Yeah. So that's something you can celebrate before Christmas. Maybe with

some Ryan Gosling themed decorations. November 12th. Number four on the list of the top six things that we'll celebrate before Christmas. And heck, we've left this late. This is happening starting tomorrow over this weekend. It's the Auckland Festival of Quilts. Heyo.

If you've got $12, you can pop along to the Auckland Netball Centre in St. John's for the Auckland Festival of Quilts. If you're under 18, guess what? Free. Oh, are you kidding me? It's the annual fundraising show for the Auckland Quilt Guild. Does that include 18-year-olds free?

Do you think that... It'll be something for-year-olds free? Do you think that... It'll be something for Fletch to do. Do you think that they're hoping that nobody under 18 ever goes to a quilt festival? I don't think there'll be a lot of them going. No, I think that's to encourage people. Right. Because they're not going if they have to pay. Featuring over 200 quilts made by the members and judged by a panel of New Zealand and Australian quilt judges.

Do you know what? I bet there's some lovely quilts there. Including the Dorothy Coulthard Challenge quilt, which will be on view, and a 12 by 12 quilt challenge. A 12 by 12? Wow. But Vaughan, will they be able to eat there? Sure. They make delicious sandwiches, cakes and espresso as well at the cafe on site. Of course they

do. On site. So if you're into quilts this weekend, baby, you're locked in. Number three on the list of the top six things we've still got to celebrate before Christmas on the 14th of November, it's World Pickle Day. Pickles. Right. Showing an appreciation for the pickle. Do you mean like a gherkin or do you mean like different pickles?

Yeah, a pickled cucumber. A pickled cucumber situation. Yummy. It's not appreciated enough. It adds that zing to a cheeseburger. I pickled cucumber situation. Yummy. It's not appreciated enough. It adds that zing to a cheeseburger. I love a pickle, even pickle by itself.

I judge people who take them out of their cheeseburger. Yeah, me too. But then I get them, so all's well. Yeah, you get two in your burger.

Yeah, instead of one. Yeah. The word pickle actually comes from the Dutch because it means to brine in Dutch. Oh, okay. So you're pickling something.

But in this case specifically, a cucumber. Well, this is all making Christmas come around faster, isn't it? Oh, really? Well, these are little stepping stones to Christmas that we can celebrate. Number two on the list of today's top six things we've still got to celebrate before Christmas. That's World Mutt Day.

That is on December 2nd this year and it celebrates mixed breed dogs. That's World Mutt Day. That is on December 2nd this year and it celebrates mixed breed dogs. That's Leo's day! Yeah. I don't like calling them a mutt though. I feel like we don't have to say that. No, it's the official title. It's called World Mutt Day. Part of it, Megan, is to take the stigma away from the

word mutt. Oh, that's good. Okay, take the word back. It is an official name. It's to show that they're just as special as their pure breed counterparts and should be afforded the same love, affection, and respect. They should, Fletch. Yeah. What, I don't judge a tabby? You do judge a tabby.

You do judge a tabby. You do. When we got our ginger tabby, you were like, yuck. You're a cat snob. Quote. I did say that. Carl Fletcher, yuck. You can just pick any cat. Quote. I did say that. Carl Fletcher, yuck. I was like, look, you can just pick any cat and you've got this one.

Oh, Bear's great as far as cats go. Yeah, give me that. He's cute. And the number one thing we've still got to celebrate before Christmas on today's Top 6. This is a massive deal. Mickey Mouse's 90th birthday. 19. November 18th, 1928 is considered the official birth date of Mickey Mouse's 90th birthday. 19. What? November 18th, 1928 is considered the official birth date of Mickey Mouse.

That's because he appeared in the short film Steamboat Willie. Have you ever seen like a black and white thing and he's steering like a tugboat thing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the first appearance of Mickey Mouse and that happened on November 18th, 1928. So that means this November 18 is Mickey Mouse's 90th birthday wow so please celebrate

with friends and family however you see fit those are the top six things we've still got to celebrate before Christmas yesterday was Halloween I know that people trick or treated

in the weekends but yesterday was like the big day for trick or treating and I live in a neighbourhood where they had like a special event planned for the children because you live on kind of like an island thing you have to drive onto Treating and I live in a neighbourhood where they had like a special event planned for

the children. Because you live on kind of like an island thing you have to drive onto. So it's perfect for it. And I didn't realise there was that many kids on our island, but they obviously have come from. You've got imported kids. We've got imports. And that's okay.

Everyone's welcome. I reckon people. Oh no. No. Because then they start taking the mick. Is that coming from too far? They're like, we're not going to trick-or-treat around our neighbourhood because everyone's useless.

Do you remember a few years ago when Remuera residents were angry that people were coming in from South Auckland to trick-or-treat in Remuera? Do you remember that? That's right. How dare they? They ran around our community board. Look, we're all for having fun as long as the children are also rich children. We got a chat yesterday from one of the mums.

She was like, oh, apparently Sandringham's where you go. Some of the women get a glass of wine while their kids go trick-or-treating. I was like, oh, really? I saw it. Anyway, that was if you wanted to have a drink while you're trick-or-treating, you could have come to Te Atatau. I saw a few mums walking around with a few ciders each and a mum with a big glass of red wine.

Yeah, why not? So there was a meeting point beforehand where they all got told the rules and they had like fruit as well as lollies beforehand. But they got told they were only allowed, they had to say please and thank you and they were only allowed to take one. Wait, so somebody

else, was it a school teacher that took charge of the crowd? No, well it must be someone that takes charge of like our community page. Who's that lady that's in charge of your community watch? It wasn't Marge. It wasn't Marge.

No, I only know her as Witchy Poo because all the messages she sent out was signed Witchy Poo. So if you needed, if you had some lollies to donate,

you could donate to Witchy Poo. Yeah. Or, and she was the one that was telling everyone if you wanted to participate, you had to put balloons on your box.

They've overly organised it. Yeah, it sounds very... You're taking a bit of fun out of it. No. You're being overly organised. There was so many people it needed some organisation. So you put a balloon on your house if they were, if you wanted kids to come in. Yeah, that's like saying you're welcome here. But there's so many

people that didn't put balloons out. I was like, oh come on. Halloween Gringes. There would have been, honestly, not even kidding, probably about 200 kids. It was a lot. Oh God, I wouldn't have put put balloons out. I was like, oh, come on. Halloween Gringes. There would have been, honestly, not even kidding, probably about 200 kids. It was a lot. Oh, God, I wouldn't have put a balloon out. And so... You would have...

And borrowed a friend's Rottweiler or Alsatian. You would have had one of those high-pitched noises going that only kids can hear. Those anti-loitering devices. I spoke to Vaughn yesterday and I was like, what's the good lollies? Because I don't want to be stingy. And so I got like wrapped chocolate lollies.

Those are legit. Kids get super excited when they get mini chocolate bars wrapped up. But I did actually put a little story up on my Instagram. I haven't listened back to that, so I might need to preface it. I have. You were very, very excited. You got very excited.

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. That's our first one. Holy shit, he's so cute. for saying that. I have. You were very, very excited. You got very excited. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, that's our first one. That's our first one. Holy shit, he's so cute. Oh, there's a little Batman coming. Am I allowed to film these kids? You can't see them.

They're all far away. That's so cute. This is our neighbour. Set up a little haunted house. There's a couple of littlies in there. Oh, shit. Okay, you're scaring the shit out of those kids. And there was some real, like when I say littlies,

they probably would have been about four, three or four. Well, they signed up for it. I know, but that's the thing. You can't just scale your scare. Depending on age, you've just got to keep a consistent scaring happening. Because when we were at our house, we could hear down a couple of houses down, you could just hear this and we're like, okay, well once we did run out of lollies,

shut up shop, took the balloon down so that didn't have kids knocking, went down and a guy had set up his shed, covered it in black. He had like all kinds of scary things. He had a, what's the smoke machine? Yeah. He had a smoke machine outside. You had to walk through his blacked out shed. Oh, actually it's kind of scary things. He had a, what's the smoke machine? Yeah. He had a smoke machine outside. He had to walk through his blacked out shed.

Actually, it's kind of creepy now. Yeah, I mean, he'll get away with that today, yesterday, but he won't get away with it. Yeah, you want to make sure you take that down. And then as he walked past where he was, he just stuck his hand out and screamed at them. And you just felt like the guy's hand like. Again, he'll get away with it yesterday

but from here on, in 364 days of the year, that's not okay. It sounds a bit creepy. But neither is luring children into your section with lollies any other day of the year. I saw yesterday that

people were getting a little bit crazy and sharing that you could get a $2 pizza from Domino's. Oh, good Lord. What size? Standard. What? While the vast majority of people were very excited about this, there were lots of people that were also just like, what the hell?

What's the deal? But it was, so it was a GrabOne voucher. I've just gone to see and no longer available. Oh, it's gone. 65,000 were sold before it became not available. So how do you even make a pizza? Because you know when you go to make homemade pizzas, it's going to be great and then you end up spending

eight times as more as you would if you just bought pizzas. Yeah. They buy bulk cheese. Yeah, yeah, obviously. If anybody's going to make pizzas for $2, it's Domino's. Well, they do the $5 pizza, don't they? That's the... Yeah, the value range is usually like $5,

but, I mean, you pay $5... You get $5 worth. You're getting $5 worth. Yeah. And not extremely fantastic. Yeah. I mean, it's fine if it's kids. They don't really care.

Yeah. But when you become a pizza snob like myself, you remember I talked about the time I took the girl to the date to the wood-fired pizza place. And she didn't really care. Yeah. But when you become a pizza snob like myself, you remember I talked about the time I took the girl to the date to the wood-fired pizza place. And she didn't respond well. She didn't want to go for a second date. I say, um, excuse me. The pizzas were fired in a wood-fired oven.

What's not to love about that? You should be telling all your friends about this. I don't know. How long did it take to take Sade to a wood-fired pizza? Couple of dates. And then that's how you knew she was the one? She loved it. She loved a wood-fired pizza and to this day loves a wood-fired pizza. They just don't spread the cheese

close enough to the edges. On a wood-fired pizza? Yeah. Is it because they don't want it dribbling into the oven? Well, you know, you make a big dribbly mess. But your handmade dough, your wood-fired pizza. Is it because they don't want it dribbling into the oven? Well, you know, you'd make a big dribbly mess. Yeah. But your handmade dough, your wood-fired pizza, much better.

Yeah. Much better. So you're not going to be delving into a $2? Well, probably not because if the girl didn't want a second date after a wood-fired pizza,

my wife might leave me after a date at Domino's for a $2 pizza. Plus the vouchers are all sold out, so, you know, there's that. Yeah. Did your parents ever

get themselves a nice version of something and then get you a cheap rubbish version? Because we've done this. What, like they were eating real nice pizza and we – no. We've done this. What, do you get like hell pizza and then get – No, we've got a lovely pizza place locally in Te Atatou. Beautiful.

Pizza Landing, it's called. Unpaid endorsement. Yeah, okay. Love them. Is it wood-, it's called Unpaid Endorsement. Yeah, okay. Love them. Is it wood-fired? No, oven-fired. But a lot of cares, a good spread.

You know, you were talking about the cheese isn't going to the edge? Pretty much right to the edge. Good, good. It's nudging the border. That's good stuff. But the kids, they like it.

They don't appreciate it enough. So we'll get them a cheap pizza, a cheap ham and cheese situation, and we'll get ourselves a nice one. And then everyone's having pizza, but we're getting the nice one. How long until they say we want the nice one? Wow. They haven't said it yet.

That's just going to be my life, though. The kids are going to get like budget vanilla, and I'm going to get like a Mofabaker. Yeah. Why waste it on them? They don't appreciate quality. They can buy that when they're old enough and they can pay for it. Wow.

I mean, you don't even have children and you're already planning how they're going to be ungrateful for anything you purchase. Yeah. Now, for those that drink and go red in the face, there is apparently great news for you. I say apparently because I haven't tested this, and it's, quote, doing the rounds on Instagram for sale. So I don't know if it's one of those. Well, now that I've Googled it, I'm probably going to get it on Facebook.

You'll be advertised. All my Facebook feed is is targeted advertising. So it's known as alcohol flush reaction. This is when your face goes red. And hot. When you drink alcohol. Right. Now normally the ALDH2

gene releases an enzyme that converts a toxin in alcohol into an energy source. Right. So your body can burn it, right? Yeah, those are the mutated gene do not make enough of the enzyme and that causes your face to flush and go red. Oh, so it's kind of like you shouldn't really be drinking it. The mutated gene do not make enough of the enzyme and that causes your face to flush and go red. Oh, so it's kind of like

you shouldn't really be drinking it. The mutated genes really affects East Asian people, doesn't it? Yeah, well, they call it Asian glow because 40% I don't, yeah, well, this is what it refers to in the news article. That does sound like a little bit racist, doesn't it? It does. Yeah, it does.

But then I'm reading 560 million people of East Asian descent carry that mutated gin. Yeah, so 40% of East Asians experience the glow when they drink. So what they've developed is the Reddy patch,

which contains an antioxidant that breaks down the toxins. So I'd imagine it's like a smoker's, like a nicotine patch. Right. So you'd put a's like a smoker's, like a nicotine patch. Right. So you'd put a patch on, you drink,

you get a six pack of patches. They're costing $11.99. A pack of 30 goes for $39.99. So I don't know if this works, but apparently, I mean, it's doing the rounds on Instagram and it's going huge online. So apparently it must work.

Well, it's, yeah, it's the lack of an enzyme because that mutated gene means it's ineffective, so you go red when you drink. So, some photos online, a couple of girls there heading out before they head out, selfie in the mirror, and their patches are on their waist.

Just under their t-shirts. My body doesn't react well when I drink, so let's put this patch on so I can. Where would you put the patch? I'd put it on their stomach. Well, they're putting it on their stomach and on the side. Yeah, I'm just thinking of my days in the club when I used to do my sexy grinding. Oh, you'd have your midriff out.

I'd pull my shirt up, yeah, or just straight up have my midriff out, or I'd have my back exposed because of one of those genie tops that was hot there, mid-2000s. Could you put them on your boobs? Yeah. Under the boobs? Well, just underneath. It could double as like a nipple cover.

That's very true. One on each nipple and then if it gets chilly. They look the size of a playing card. Okay. So I don't know if you'd be able

to wrap that in a thigh that might, or out a thigh. Yeah. Anywhere really. Some of them are putting two on as well before they head out. Well, there you go. That's the nipple theory. I don't really. Butt cheek. Some of them are putting two on as well before they head out.

Well, there you go. That's the nipples theory. I don't know. If that's you and you get red when you drink, maybe something you can look into. But does it help? So it helps your body? Like it actually fixes it?

Or is it just covering up the symptoms? Well, it puts an enzyme into your bloodstream. Oh, so it is actually like helping your body. Well, apparently. Well, that's the mutated gene. This was a massive study at the start of the year. Alcohol can cause DNA damage if you've got this. Apparently, it can lead to higher incidences of esophageal cancer.

It looks throaty, that word. Oh, really? Okay. It's a little throaty. It looks like esophagus. But it's not esophageal. Okay. Heart attacks andy, that word. Oh, really? Okay. It's a little throaty. It looks like esophagus. Esophagal? But it's not esophagal cancer. Heart attacks and osteoporosis. Because it can't break down

the booze and that's what makes you go red, but it's also associated to that slightly higher. Okay. Wow. There you go. Slap her. I'd love for someone to try that just to see if that's a thing. Yeah. Because I don't go red when I drink. No. Just obnoxious.

Excuse me. Is there a patch for that? Well, I don't know, but you can have it sober if you wanted. How rude. Last night, trick-or-treating, Halloween.

That's taken off, by the way. I was talking to some other people because I didn't grow up in town. I grew up in the country, so we couldn't trick-or-treat, Halloween. That's taken off by the way. I was talking to some other people. Because I didn't grow up in town. I grew up in the country so we couldn't trick-or-treat. Even like when we grew up in the towns or cities, it wasn't that big. I remember going trick-or-treating and everyone's like, what are you doing? Yeah, what are you doing?

You knock on the door and they're like, how are you? What do you want? I want to learn this trick-or-treat. Calling the police. Get out my brother. But it is much bigger now. I kind of like it though. It is cool. Yeah. I mean, they don't come to my house.

It's a good little community feel, I thought. Last night the community felt really good. Everyone's walking around and getting lollies and having an alcoholic beverage while doing so. Maybe, I don't know. Maybe that's the frown upon pie. Yeah. Yeah, maybe. Didn't happen in my neighbourhood.

It eases the pain of screaming children. That's science. But not everybody had lollies last night. Then we went to a couple of houses where they'd run out. Oh, okay. We ran out a lot. They're like, I'm really sorry we've run out. One kid actually gave my kid some of the lollies that he'd got

while he was out trick-or-treating because he's like, we're out of lollies, but here, you can have some. That was very sweet. I've never done that. Girls. Well, he'd been on a bit., but here, you can have some. But I thought that was very sweet. So he had none of you girls. Well, he'd been none of me. He was about the same age. He watched that. He was very generous.

But I'd also got to that house where there was packets of raisins at the end of this driveway, and we're like, what's happening here? And then we went up, and they were giving out packets of sun-made raisins. I was like, right, because they've just got to the end of the driveway, and they're like, yuck. Throwing them away because they don't want raisins. But then I, right, kids have just got to the end of the drum and they're like, yuck. Throwing them away because they don't want raisins. But then I had friends who were like,

what do we do? You've got kids. What do we do? We don't have any lollies. What can we give them? Yeah. I was like, I don't know. What have you got?

They were like, almonds? Leftover medications? Yeah. No, you're not to give them leftover medications. Some parents are even anti giving them chewing gum. I was like, well, you're taking them out. You can't be too fussy about what you're getting. Yeah. Just tell them giving them chewing gum. I was like,

well, you're taking them out. You can't be too fussy about what you're getting. Yeah. Just tell them that you can't. And you're a fan that's got a sugary coating. The capsules do.

But again, but again. You're not allowed to. There was kids coming to our door with cans of Coke and I was like, oh, you've all got a drink for the road. And they're like,

oh no, the lady up the road only had a box of Coke, like cans. So she just gave them cans of Coke. And then someone on my Instagram said that they didn't have anything, so they were giving up bananas to the kids. Oh, lame house.

Well, you'd have to go half bananas. You'd tear through a bunch of bananas. Unless this person is an absolute banana hoarder. And, like, you'd want bobby bananas, right, for the kids? The little ladyfinger ones. Otherwise they're just going to have to throw them out down the road. They'll be half finished. You'll have banana skins scattered throughout the neighbourhood.

But we're not hugely prepped, Kiwis. No. It's just like a new thing. We're getting there though. Yeah. It actually makes you take a look at yourself when the trick-or-treaters come and you don't have any lollies in the house. As an adult, you're like, what has become of me?

As a child, I promised myself I'd have a lolly jar. But I don't have a lolly jar. Intern Anya, you, when you were a kid, going trick-or-treating, you went to a dentist's house. Yeah, and I got a tangerine and a bloody lecture. It was a bad time. That's actually not too bad, though, because as an adult, to get a lecture

from the dentist, it'll cost you a few hundred bucks. You have a lie down, they stick a drill in you, you have to see the hygienist, then you get a thorough lecture about flossing and then the pleasure costs you 500 bucks. If your mum was a dentist or a dad was a dentist, would you ever be allowed lollies? It'd be no fun, eh?

They'd definitely monitor you. It'd be highly monitored. Yeah, right. They might want you excluded from the festivities of... It would suck when you're young, but then when you get older, free dental. Yeah, true. Very true.

Very true. Although you wouldn't need it because you hadn't had all the sugary decay as a child. That's true too. Yeah. Yeah. But then they've got a boat and a nice house and stuff, so that's always good to have.

Yeah, true. Okay, true. Or a crippling student debt that they just can't manage to pay off. I want to know this morning either what you got dished out when you were a kid and you were trick-or-treating or what you had to dish out to kids due to lack of lollies.

Yeah, because you weren't prepared for Halloween. Which is getting bigger. And how did they react? We're talking about going trick-or-treating and not getting lollies. What did you get instead? Some text messages in on the subject before we take some calls. Back in the early 90s, we went to the only Chinese family in the neighbourhood to go trick-or-treating when we were trick-or-treating.

They were delighted to see us. They were so happy. They were like, come inside, come inside. They had photos with us and everything. And the kids were just like, this is going to be good. Like, this is going to be great. We've invested a lot of time in them. They're like blowing away.

It's going to be lollies galore. lot of time in them. They're like blowing away. It's going to be lollies galore. We've got an Anzac biscuit each. Not happy. Not happy at all. That's one of my least favourite biscuits. Not even a chocolate biscuit. No. Not even a chocolate biscuit.

Somebody else said, I went trick-or-treating and got a lecture about God and given a mini Bible. Oh, because is Halloween like a... Is that bad? It's a pagan-y, heathen-y, evil-worshipping one, isn't it? Devil-y and bad. Did you turn up as the devil or something?

Well, we had Bible in schools at my school. And on the Halloween week, the woman told us if we got our faces painted, we'd all go to hell. That's a hell of a thing to lay on in that year, right? A better part of the butterfly. Quinn, what happened? Hey, man.

Yeah, so when I was a kid, I didn't really grow up in the richest neighborhood, but one day me and my sister went out for trick-or-treating and we both traded the house. She got lollies on her one and I ended up getting five bucks with my guy. Oh, five dollars. That's all right. He was just like, I getting five bucks with my guy. Oh, five dollars. That's all right. He was just like, I'm wildly unprepared for this.

Here's five dollars. Go away. I'll buy my way out of it. The funny thing was that there was a dairy next door. He was like, just go over there and get you some lollies. Yeah, good. Oh, right. That's what he's doing.

And this was back when lollies were like five cents, you know. Oh, you would have got so many lollies. Oh, God. Who was the best? Gwen, thanks for your call. Carmen, what did you get trick-or-treating? Hi. So I took my daughter to trick-or-treat yesterday.

She's nine. Oh, yeah. And we came across this house and there was a couple in there and they were obviously busy with something. We knocked on the door and they said, oh, look, sorry, we're moving. And they started scrambling

and they come back and they had a bottle of port. And they were really apologetic about the fact that they'd already opened it. Regardless if it's open or not, should it be given to a child? Don't start them on port. That's where you end your drinking career. Carmen, thanks for your call. Brian, what did you think about trick-or-treating? Good.

How you going? Good. Yeah, good. I ended up giving out a double scoop of French vanilla ice cream in a cone. French vanilla? Oh, hot cloud. I love French vanilla. And a double scoop at that.

Yeah, generous. That's generous. That's a generous portion. Yeah, right. And you see you had the cones on hand as well? Yeah, I had the cones. It was a pretty good result. I'm pretty happy with it, to be fair.

I bet they were. I'd be so good with an ice cream. I'd even get some of my lollies and stick them in the ice cream. Yeah, good call. Although French vanilla, I don't want to, you know, I mean, it's a nice thing you've done there, but French vanilla is a bit plain. Oh, it's my favourite plain, though.

I love a good bit of French vanilla. You don't even go like a chocolate or a boysenberry ripple, Ryan? Yeah, boysenberry ripple is probably my favourite, to be fair. Oh, okay, yeah. It's underrated. You don't want to waste that on the kids, though, do you? That's quite a morate. Thanks, you're cool, Ryan.

Awesome. Some texts. We were trick-or-treating. A man didn't have anything, so he gave us a sizzler sausage each. Cooked or not cooked? Raw. But steamed by, I don't know, they're pre-cooked, aren't they? So you can just warm these up and then you can eat them.

Yeah. I got a roll of toilet paper trick-or-treating once. He said, pop this in your little bucket. You'll need this later, which he wasn't wrong. We went trick-or-treating in the last house we went to. The woman gave all the kids toothbrushes and mini tubes of toothpaste. She worked for Colgate. Brand marketing employee, every kid had a brand

new Colgate toothbrush. A drunk lady, we went trick-or-treating in Waiuku and a drunk lady may stay and listen to her son's band's CD. I think that's called kidnapping. That is kidnapping. If they want to leave and you're keeping them against. I think that's called kidnapping. Word 12, that is kidnapping. If they want to leave and you're keeping them against their will,

that is definitely kidnapping. How do you know if it's really Sarah? How do you know if it's really her? Good morning, Sarah. How are you? Hi, I'm good, thank you. How are you guys? Great.

Having your name in lights, really. Having your name sung. I I'm good, thank you. How are you guys? Greatest thing. Having your name in lights, really. Having your name sung. I really enjoyed that. Thank you. Now, Sarah, we're going to ask some questions. This is how the segment works for those that have never heard it. We're going to ask some questions about you, Sarah, and we're going to see if anybody listening now knows you.

Okay, cool. So, whereabouts do you live? How old are you? I live in Christchurch and I'm 28. Oh, let's all ask it at the same time. Okay. What school did you go to? Rickerton.

Okay. There you go. Famously, if you meet someone from Christchurch. You always ask. You always ask what school you went to. Now, what do you do for like a job and stuff? I work in marketing. Okay.

Okay. All right. Do you want to say who for or is that a secret? A retirement village operator based here in Christchurch. Oh, marketing. Okay. All right. Do you want to say who for or is that a secret? A retirement village operator based here in Christchurch. Okay. So when you were at school, did you have a sport that you played or like a hobby? No, I'm not very good at that. Sarah, are you too young to be marketing rest homes?

Shouldn't that be like Keith Quinn's job or something? I really enjoy it. It's lots of fun. Really? But like, do you meet old people and you're like, hey mate, look.

We do some cool stuff. Did you see that happy video a couple of years ago? Yes. We tweeted it. Yes. And that was our company.

That was lovely. They look like they're having so much fun in their twilight. At least your parents would give you a good Christmas presents. Otherwise you'd be like, I'll ship you off to this home.

I've got a good deal. Oh, they'd probably want a discount from her. Do you have any other hobbies or extracurricular that people would know you from? I am pretty involved with my husband's rugby here in Christchurch. I really enjoy that. Did you just say wag? Yeah. Okay, so you wouldn't consider yourself a wag,

because I know some women don't want to be defined by that, do they? Oh, what's wrong with that? I don't know. Well, it just means wife and girlfriend, doesn't it? Yeah, but you're more than that. Well, you are. You are more than that. You are way more than that.

Okay, what else? Any other little kind of tidbits? I didn't do all of my schooling in Christchurch. I grew up in Mossfield, just outside of the Maiden. Nice. Okay, okay. Nice. Okay. Okay. Yep.

Yep. Lovely spot there with the sign on the hill. All right. Well, now is the time that we ask if you are listening and you think you know Sarah, 0800 DARS at M.

Yes. Got a couple of people who have called through. We're going to see who knows you. Good morning, Megan. Hello. How do you know Sarah? I work with Sarah.

What, as a retirement? Yeah, as a retirement village company. God, you guys just sound so young. I thought it would be old people marketing to other old people, but then I suppose that you... Yeah, but old people don't know about Facebook and stuff. No, you're true. But then old people...

Oh, we do have Facebook, yeah. Yeah, see, that's what I mean. Is it a thriving business? Are there many old people on Facebook? Well, my grandma's on Facebook. Oh, right. Okay.

So you two work together? So that's confirmed. Yep, yep. That's true. Play the music. We can go from there? Yeah. Okay.

That's how you know that it's really Sarah. That's how you know that it's really her. Olivia. I don't like the song part. Olivia. Olivia, good morning.

Good morning. How do you know Sarah? I'm one of the fellow wigs of Sarah at our husband's rugby club. Oh. She is. Do you know who Olivia is, Sarah? Yeah, we've started a social committee for the rugby team as well. You guys are the Stepford wives of this rugby club.

Yeah. Is that you, Olivia? You've started the committee? Yes, that's me. I'm so glad my wife doesn't play sport. I'd hate to have to go to watch sport every week. Well, I'm stoked my kids... We don't have to do the fun parts.

We don't have to do any physical exercise. But do you have to watch 80 minutes of boring rugby every week? Like... Yeah. Ah, see? They're all dirty and want a hug. You're like, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, it's stinking.

Go have the showers first. Get out of here when you're clean. Well, it's a one-up. We love them. It's another one-up. Yeah. That's how you know that it's really Sarah. That's how you know that it's really her.

She's loving it every time. Oh, she's how you know that it's really her. She's loving it every time. Oh, she's laughing. I'm just stoked how stoked Sarah is. Grace, good morning. Good morning. How do you know Sarah? I work with Sarah. How many young sounding females work in this room?

Oh, I know what it is. Grace, Megan, Sarah. You're flirting with the old boys. You'll be like, hey. What? You flirt with the old guys, don't you? Because old boys love when young ladies flirt with them. Okay, boy.

You're like, guys. Sorry, lost my sound. Okay, don't worry about it. She's just ignoring you. I won't repeat my joke a third time. Nice. Now, is she nice to work with, Grace? She doesn't steal lunch out of the fridge?

No, she's so nice to work with. She's a great team member. Yeah. Good. There we go. Good. That's how you know that it's really Sarah. That's how you know that it's really her.

No one from her earlier stages of life called through, eh? We're all current. Hmm. Hmm. Okay. In witness protection, are we, Sarah? Another caller. Shana,. Okay. What is protection are we, Sarah? Another caller. Shana, good morning.

Good morning. How do you know Sarah? Sarah's my boss. She's my marketing exec. Are you a boss, Sarah? Oh, girl. No, we just work together. Oh.

No, she just said she gave you the power there, the hierarchy. The boss. You're her boss. Is she a good boss, Shana? Yeah, she just said she gave you the power there, the hierarchy. The boss. You're her boss. Is she a good boss, Shana? Yes, she's amazing. Are you supposed to be working yet, Shana? Pardon? Are you supposed to?

Yeah, I'm in the car. Yeah, close enough. Intend to work today. I'm on the way to work, that's enough. Well, that's another winner, isn't it? Yeah. That's how you know that it's really Sarah. That's how you know that it's really Sarah. That's how you know that it's really her.

So no one from the early days though, Sarah. Oh. No one from the early days, because that's where the scandal happens, isn't it? You get the exes coming through. Yeah, maybe I'm lucky. I'm just thinking all those people that you work with that called and all sounded similar, it must be so confusing for the old people. They probably just all think we're the same person.

Oh, they might do. Well, then people knew you. That's all we can ask. Sarah, thank you so much for playing. How do you know? Another successful round. So there is now a London-based Instagram person. I don't want to call her an influencer.

She runs a school of affluence where basically it's an online finishing program where it can show women how they can bag themselves a billionaire or a rich guy. I mean, it's not how I would choose to live my life, but I'm not here to bag how she chooses to live hers. Now, to bag a billionaire in New Zealand there's only two. Graham Hart.

Is there only two? Graham Hart. He's worth 9.5 billion. He's taken right? He's taken. He's taken. His wife will not be happy if you strut around there

trying to pick him up. Who's the other billionaire? Richard Chandler. Oh yeah. He's an investor by the looks of things. Okay. Do we know if he needs a wife or a spouse?

It does say he's married. Oh, I was just looking him up on Facebook. Okay. So we're going to have to go scale that down to millionaire because there'll be a few millionaires, right, in New Zealand, you'd imagine? Heaps. Yeah, heaps. Anyone that bought a property in the 90s and just has one still now.

Yeah. So she basically says a high caliber woman will get a high caliber man and she has tips, specific tips that will turn these types of men on and what will turn them off.

Right. I don't know about, is it right high caliber men need high caliber women? Some rich men are into weird stuff. My problem with this list is the things she said

that will turn a man on is not what I would consider a high-caliber woman. So these things in my mind are not what makes a high-caliber woman. But then she is obviously dealing in this dating world and in this rich world. She knows what these men like. Yeah. So hence she's put out the list.

Yeah, and it's pretty superficial, unfortunately. Okay. So shall I start with what turns them on? Okay. Yeah. So, shall I start with what turns them on? Okay. Yeah. Wearing nail polish. This is the type of stuff we're looking at. That's pretty, that's low end, isn't it?

That's like, anybody can wear nail polish. Yeah, well, they're all pretty low end. Wearing nail polish, she said wearing makeup, but never to look like you're wearing too much. Okay. Just a little bit of makeup. Mm-hmm. Dress elegantly and appropriately.

So nothing too revealing. This feels very like 1950s housewife. This almost feels like a list of- But this is happening now. How to be a great housewife. Your man after he returns from war. And she's like a young woman. Right.

So this is happening now. Is she single or has she got a billionaire already? Oh, I don't know. That's what I always find. She says she has made these mistakes in the past. Like when dating experts and you're like, well, what's up with you? And they're like, I'm still single. Yeah.

It's like, oh, okay. No, but they might have not met the right person yet. It's not all on one person. Those who can't teach. That's what they say. Those who can't, comma, teach. And the last one is behave in a feminine way. Oh.

You can't see the face I'm making. What does that mean? Well, I think we know what they are justifying as a feminine way, but I have all sorts of problems with that, but that's okay. Things women do that turn rich men off. Okay. I bet some of these will turn us on. Because we're poor.

That's how it works, right? All polar opposite stuff. Don't ask for money. That's a given. You're making it straight up obvious that you're there for money and not much else. Surely if you're a billionaire or a multi-millionaire and you start dating someone... You're not very rarely would you both be billionaires or both in the same.

So you're probably going to have to at some point ask for money. But maybe just be a little bit sly about it. Yeah. Which we all do. Like drop subtle hints like, oh my God, my student loan is so expensive. It's just crippling me. And then just leave it at that. And he'll be like, oh, yeah, they do their lines.

Spending too much time on the phone will turn a rich man off, apparently. I guess you're not paying attention. It will turn anyone off because you're not paying them attention. You're not present in the relationship, right? Right, yeah. I'm not going to say this word, but wearing an S-word outfit. So anything too revealing in public, they are not fond of. And using rough or masculine language, including swear words.

I love hearing women say swear words. So just any kind of Kiwi. Don't use anything too rough. Or masculine language. That is such a dumbass. Please. Oh, yeah. Get it, mate. How are you? quite like we all kind of yeah don't use anything too rough yeah right or mask in a language oh there's such a dumb mask please oh yeah

get it mate how are ya I'd like to say that we read this out as kind of a piss take yeah yeah or a tongue in cheek

please don't adhere to any of those females be who you want to be you do you babes you do you exactly and if he can't love you

for you for the way that you are yeah he's not your man no and that goes both ways too for guys if she can't love you for you. For the way that you are, he's not your man. No, and that goes both ways too. If she can't love you. Oh, no. It's always door uppers.

Oh, okay. I think that's what we call gender equality. Fact of the day, day enough poos, you can stop an escalator. How do we know this? With enough poos. That's a wonderful question, Megan, which leads me nicely to San Francisco. Okay. The year's 2012 and the escalator down to the BART station,

that's the Bay Area Rail Transport. Yeah. The hardest part about this fact of the day was finding out what BART stood for. Is it Rapid Transit or Rail? Rapid Transit. Yeah, I thought it was Rapid Transit. Not Rail Transport. That's what I thought it was.

That was my initial, that's what I was going with. But then I Googled it and it took me a little while to find out Rapid Transit. You're right. Yeah. Bay Area Rapid Transit in San Francisco. There was complaints that the escalators down into the station were running very slow. And then all of a sudden they stopped. Okay.

And the technicians like, well, this is unusual. I don't know what's happened here. And so they, as you've ever seen when they pull apart an escalator. Oh, it's like pretty scary. It looks like a mincer. Well, did you see that? I put it on my story last week. That was in France going down into the metro station, and it was a huge escalator, and it just went in free fall.

Too many people were on it, and the gear, it broke off on a gear. Yeah. And then it had no, the brakes couldn't hold the amount of weight on it, and so it just started spinning down and chucking people off. Oh, see, I don't like them. Yeah, I think one woman got her leg minced at the end. Oh, doesn't surprise me. Don't trust them.

No. Well, they're just pretty much big cheese graters for humans, really. Waiting to chew up a jandal or a toe, should you not jump off at the end quick enough. Also, they pull it apart. And at the bottom, they find what they described as an insane amount of human excrement. Okay.

Upon inspection of the CCTV footage and further inspection, they found that the San Fran homeless population was indeed pooping onto the escalator. Right. Just to see what would happen. Oh, my God. Well, for a start, apparently, it was to what would happen, and it would get to the end, and it would mince it and disappear. So then it became a thing of, because they get in trouble on camera and everything,

if they get caught urinating or defecating in public, these people don't have anywhere to go. They're homeless. So they turned to pooping on the escalator to get rid of it. The problem disappears. 100%. Although, doesn't it just smear it around in a continuous slope? Well, no, because there's a little thing on the bottom.

I didn't know about this, and I don't know if this is on every escalator, but, like, it cleans stuff off. Oh, like bristles. Like a sweeper or something. Like it sweeps it off. So it was sweeping it and flicking it back in. Oh, no.

And it got to the point where it got so jammed up that it slowed down and then eventually stopped. Oh, that's grim. The man who was then pulling it apart had to call the hazardous materials team who came down and took a long time to fix it. They said it was the most putrid

mix that they've ever come across in their job because it was like gum. Yeah. Bit of lint. Bit of everything. Bit of everything down there. Someone had to clean gum. Yeah. Yeah. Bit of lint. Bit of everything. Bit of everything down there. Yeah. Someone had to clean that. Yeah.

So that backs it up. I quit after that day. Or I quit before. No, see, I quit it before I did it. Once you've done it, you might as well do that job forever because you've reached the Everest of gross things you're going to have to deal with. Yeah.

But you see it, you're like, I quit. Yeah. Good luck with all this situation. So there's the backup and the science behind today's fact of the day, which is enough poos can stop an escalator. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. I caught up with some friends last night who again thought my Milwaukee Bucks hat was a Jagermeister promo hat. Because it's got a deer.

It's got a stag on it. You just got this hat because it fits. And because I like deers. Okay. I like stags. So when I saw this. But now it's the team I support, right? And they are the only unbeaten team in the NBA this season. But you don't, you never.

Lucky charm. This is like after I watched The Wire, great HBO show, The Wire, set in Baltimore. I started supporting the Baltimore Ravens. Halfheartedly. Yeah. In the NFL and they won Super Bowl that year. You don't like sports. No, I know Super Bowl that year. You don't like sports. No, I know, but I like...

You don't even watch any of the games. I watch the highlights packages occasionally. But it doesn't matter why you support a team. I can't help that I'm a lucky charm to sports teams. Okay. I support them and they hit a winning streak. Have you thought about supporting some New Zealand teams? Yeah. I mean, Have you thought about supporting some New Zealand teams? Yeah.

I mean, I've thought about it. But they don't have neat animals and stuff. Oh, well, I know there's the Central Stags. That's a cricket team because their logo is similar to this one. Yeah. So why don't you support them? Yeah, no, because Marty Gutman tells them off. Yeah, why?

He's getting told off. He's like, you can't support. Well, I supported the Knights because I got sent a hat, a cricket hat, and it had pink swords crossing. And I thought it was funny because, you know, like, a pink sword is sort of like, you know?

Are you saying it's like a penis? Yeah. And then two of them were, like, laying on top of each other. So I was like, it's quite funny that a sports team has... How did you even... Two pink swords touching.

It's great. Pink swords. We'll two pink swords touching. It's great. Pink swords. You would never have come to that conclusion. Whoa. I just saw it. I was like, that's funny. And then I wore it. And then people were like, oh, good to see you supporting your home cricket team.

I was like, what? Oh, yeah. Okay. Cool, man. But then you got a free Auckland Aces hat, but you didn't like that, did you? You didn't like the hat? Nah. Because it's like two cards.

Yeah. That's like, cards and that's like I like animals it's not the ravens I liked from the Baltimore because of the wire but also because

it's quite a cool looking bird so weird that you support sports teams based on logos and TV shows that they might in some way loosely be

so I said well you think it was weird but last night when I explained to my friend that this wasn't a Jagermeister hat but I support this team because I like the animal, they said, oh, that's like that team I supported,

the orange team. We still don't know what orange team. No, I think it was the West Tigers in the NRL. Oh, because they have an orange uniform. Because they've got an orange uniform. Okay. And they were like, I just thought the orange looked nice, so that was why I supported them.

I was like, that's as good a reason as any to support a team, right? Do the Charlotte Hornets exist? Yeah. Are they still the Charlotte Hornets? I don't know, because I used to wear a Charlotte Hornets hat because this guy really liked them. Oh, so that's why you supported the Charlotte Hornets. I don't know.

I don't even know what sport that is, but it was a purple hat. Yeah, still a basketball team. Oh, basketball. Still a good... Based in Charlotte, North Carolina. Yeah. I think I always thought it was softball. Because they went away for a bit and then they came back.

Owned by Michael Jordan. FYI. Get out. Yeah, I knew that. See, maybe that's why you could support. But it was a cool purple hat and the guy, like, was wearing one. It was like a purpley... So you supported a team because a guy liked them.

Yeah, and I wanted it to be like, there would be like a reason for him to come up to me and be like, oh my God, I like them too. See, people don't support sports teams because necessarily it's where they're from or they like the sport. They support them because they like the animal,

they like the colour or they wanted a guy to like. Okay, 0800 dials it in. Can you add to this list? Do you follow a sports team? For a weird reason. For a weird reason. Whether or not it's the colour of the uniform,

you're trying to impress a guy, trying to impress someone. 0800 DARS at M 9696. Let's see if Vaughan's alone here. Weird reasons you support a sports team. The colour, the logo. Not the only one, Vaughan. I'm certainly not the only one.

Some text messages in on the subject. I was a Dunedin rate payer for years, and I once opened my rates bill and saw how much went to the local rugby team, and I said, well, I better support the Highlanders then. If I'm paying for them, I should be supporting them somewhat. I support the Timberwolves, because I saw their thing once.

It was a wolf. I was like, that's pretty great. And every time I say their name, I go, Timberwolves. True story. I bought a San Jose Sharks cap because they had a cool logo and it was a good colour. I wore it for years. I could not tell you what sport they play.

San Jose. Baseball? No. Football. Football. Football. Football. San Jose Sharks. I put Wolves. San Jose Sharks Oh wolves Oh I put wolves San Jose Sharks Okay Football

Apparently That took all of us to Hockey Hockey Ice hockey Ice hockey See look at us go with our sports Thanks producer James

Somebody else said I'm a big Green Bay Packers fan I've even got their logo tattooed on me All because Their logo was a G And when I was at school My nickname was G So now I support the because their logo was a G, and when I was at school, my nickname was G. So now I support the team

whose logo is a massive G. Chloe, what team do you support? Well, I only support Queensland because they have the prettiest colour. So you prefer a maroon to a blue, do you? I do. The maroon really does it for me. Okay, but you don't know

anything about the teams or the players? No, they should just win because they've got the prettiest colour. So what do you say? The colour looks better than blue? Are we talking about wrapped around the thighs of a big hunky league player it looks better or just in general maroons are better colour than blue? In general maroons are better colour because they've all got quite nice size. Yeah, they do actually. That's a good reason as any Chloe thinks you call.

Tala, what team do you support? I support the Tigers and the Panthers and the NRL because they have big cats for their next book. That's a really great reason. You don't care anything about the players. It's just the animals. Yeah, that's about right. But what if the Tigers were playing the panthers?

Probably tigers. There was a big cat debate internally. There really was. What's a bigger cat? Although the panther to me seems more sleeker. Yeah.

Well, tigers are stripy. When that, like back in the day they'd play a team like the Sea Eagles. Would you be like, yes, it's cat versus bird. This one's in the bag. Yeah. Yeah, totally.

Tala, thanks for your call. John, what team do you support? The Anaheim Ducks. The Anaheim Ducks. I know why. I know why. Why? The Disney movies.

Mighty Ducks. It's like the only ice hockey team that I know off the top of my head because of the Mighty Ducks movies. Okay, and do you watch the games? Oh, yeah. I've got an NHL TV subscription. I watch every game that I can. So you got into it because of Mighty Ducks movies?

Yep, that's correct. I'm not the only one in the fan base, and particularly New Zealand that has, but yeah. Well, our exposure to ice hockey was so limited before those movies

and then we're all like, wow, let's do the Flying V. John, thanks for your call. Some other people support teams for weird reasons. We've been unknowingly supporting the Boston Red Sox

for years because our family's surname starts with B and Dad buys us Boston Red Sox merchandise. It's got a B on it. Got a reason as any. Somebody else said they support the Bulldogs and the NRL

because they've got a Bulldog. So that seems like they've got to support their breed of dog, don't they? I mean, that makes great sense. Somebody else said I support the Otago Highlanders still because when I was, I used to have a massive crush on Josh Kronfeld. And I've just kind of stuck with the team that he played with. Okay. Somebody else said I support the Hurricanes because of that song,

Black and Yellow, Black and Yellow. I was like, oh, that's their colours. I guess that, I like that song. Black and Yellow. Yeah. Wow. I support the Vikings in American football because their uniforms are blue and yellow

and that colour combination's great. I like the Tottenham Hotspur just because the name's really fun to say. I know. Tottenham Hotspur. Tottenham Hotspur. Tottenham Hotspur. There you go.

So you having a hat because you like, because I like the deer, is not at all ridiculous really in, in the scheme of things. No.