ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - October 04 2019

Episode Date: October 3, 2019

Happy Friday! Don't Get Fletch Started and has someone flirted with your partner in front of you?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music. Lives here. Fletch Warner Megan. The podcast. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch Warner Megan. It took me a while to get my plug in for my headphones. Mine's not in. There we go. I tell you what, do we have something to talk about soon? Megan has been approached to be an influencer. An ambassador. I'm really torn.

Jesus, I hope not. For a certain type of product. We'll delve into this. Touch on this. In about 10 minutes. Go around this. Okay, stop it. Don't say pat this. Touch on this. In about 10 minutes. Go around this. Okay, stop it. Don't say pat this.

Stop it! Oh my god. Wow. What a strong start to it. My brothers are talking about my vagina. That's what it feels like. Alright, coming up on the show we've got the top six. Another $1000 for you to win today with our bonus talking about my vagina. That's what it feels like. All right.

Coming up on the show, we've got the top six. Another $1,000 for you to win today with our bonus banger that'll play after nine this morning. We'll give you the bonus banger soon. And Megan. Yes. It's your flashback Friday.

I know. So you've got to pick a real old banger that's at least 10 years old at eight o'clock this morning. To follow up last week's banger. Yeah. Which was a real old banger. Alright you lot, listen up. It's story time.

Calvin Harris with that mega mix. DJ Fletcher. Story time. As always I will give Vaughan and Megan three news headlines. Interesting, unusual, weird news stories that I've found. And then you've got to pick one only. And the others are deleted forever.

Headline one, rules are rules. Headline two, police seek man wearing shark onesie. And headline three, carjacking cover-up. Choose. Rules are rules. I want number two. What was two again? Police seek man wearing shark onesie.

Don't Google. Rules are rules. You want that one. Yeah. Why not, eh? Well, should we go with that one? Better than the shark story, to be honest. Okay, I'm just Googling that anyway.

How is it taking you this long to Google? Because I'm thinking, do I Google police sick man and wearing, oh, he just was wearing a shark onesie and he shoved a McDonald's worker. I mean, not just shoved a McDonald's worker. No shoving, please. Just shoved. There's not really much more to that, is there? No, there really isn't.

Okay. You kids stop. Keep your hands to yourself. That's how you need to handle showers. Is that how you tell your kids off? What's going on in here? I'd find it very hard to take you seriously if you were telling me off as a kid. I'd be like, whatever, Dad.

This is how it happens. Yeah. This is the very important part. Okay. So they hear you coming. And they're like, Judy's coming. That didn't sound menacing, though. No, it sounds like I'm in a hurry.

And then I'm like, what's going on in here? And then that kind of stops it. And then there's a lot of finger pointing. And I'm like, stop, stop, stop, stop. I don't want to hear it. You just asked. I know, but you think about your parents Always ask you things and then Cut you off from explaining And then I said

This is the absolute last time Yeah I've heard that before But I also That is the last time That's the key with saying the last Don't say the last time unless you mean to be the last time Alright well we go now to Canada Where a former dental hygienist

has lost his job and is fighting to get it back because he, at the time, treated in the dental hygienist chair his fiancée. And rules in this particular state and area of Canada prohibit patient

dental hygienist relationships. The woman is now his wife. Yeah. And he still doesn't have his job back because they are saying rules are rules and you treated your fiance and you're not allowed to... But what came first,

the relationship or the dental treatment? The relationship. So he didn't meet her in the dentist chair. Because I can imagine that would be an issue. Because you drug them up. And then you're like, do you want to go out with me? And they're like, you're like, that's a yes.

We're boyfriend and girlfriend now. And then they come to and they're like, oh dear, I don't know how to break up with this person. But if you were going out with them first, you'd think, and in a lot of other places, that's not a thing. Like if that person is your fiance or your partner, it's okay. Yeah, I would have thought so. And I mean, I would imagine she would have been getting the hygienist for free.

Oh, that's a bit rough if your husband was charging you. Yeah, that's half the perks of it. Yeah. So if you were going to have a raft, okay, you're allowed to see three people, primarily for their proficiency, you get it for free. What three professions? Well, obviously, doctor. I was going to say pilot because, like, say they could give you free flight. Get on there, sweet staff travel.

Pilot, doctor. Doctor. A GP because give you free flight. Get on there, sweet staff travel. Pilot, doctor. Doctor. A GP, because then you get the general. Not a specialist. And there's something fun in there. They'd refer you to a specialist because you can't pick a specialist until you've got the problem. Yeah, because you wouldn't know.

No, but there's something better than a GP, because you don't need a doctor that often. Yeah, I'm with Megan. I'd rather have a dentist than a doctor. Like a chef. Oh, yeah, good call. But then a dentist, like, could you start seeing them get everything you need done

and then dump them. And go out with another and pick up another professional. Yeah, right. Okay. Sure. A lawyer would be handy. Someone from Fulton Hogan. An accountant. Because you'd have a sweet driveway. You know like a really nice driveway if you had a long driveway. Yep. A Ferrari car salesman.

No, no, no, no, no, no. What? We're talking like specialists. Professionals. Like a professional professional. You just said someone in a job they can get free stuff from. I want a pilot for holidays,

a Ferrari car salesman. For a Ferrari. For a Ferrari. Yeah. And what was the other one? A chef. Cook me dinner. The chefs famously don't like

going home and cooking dinners though. No. Every chef I know was a big Mac is on the way home type. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. I got an email that I discussed with the boys this morning. Had no intention of talking about it on the radio.

But you know, these guys like it. Well, we instantly thought. Made us laugh. We instantly thought, these guys made us laugh. We instantly thought, this needs to be discussed. Why don't you read people the message that you received overnight? Hi Megan, blah blah blah

on Instagram, we've seen your social media, we would love to partner with you in a collaboration. Sounds great, sounds great. So this company aims to partner with you in a collaboration. Sounds great sci-fi, doesn't it? Sounds like ching ching, money, money, money. So this company aims to break the social stigmas behind female wellness.

Sounds right up my wheelhouse. Wheelhouse? Alley. Is that what you call it? Right up your alley, right in your wheelhouse. Two different sayings you've merged there. You don't want to go right up your wheelhouse. It doesn't sound comfortable.

Or put it in your alley. There's a lot of this coming. As I said the second one, I was like, we didn't do the second one. I got a feeling we're going to, many on the horizon. Why shouldn't something as important and natural as self-love be promoted openly? And I was like, you should love yourself. This is very important. Absolutely.

And they talk about empowering women across the world. I was like, yes, again, totally for it. And they want people around the world to embrace self-love and bring forward discussions relating to topics that were previously stigmatized or considered taboo. And I'm like, where is this going? Okay. They go on to give me compliments.

We don't need to read those out. That's so New Zealand of you. So they want to send me something called the Empress. And I was like, what's that? And they were like, refer to the brochure attached. Sweet, naive Megan. And then I realised that by self-love, they mean like self, by yourself love.

Yeah. Like loving yourself by yourself. Yeah. The one that Vaughn does five times a day. I beg your pardon. That kind of loving yourself. I wonder if my name's Sully. We could be adults about this.

They said they have 300 plus five star reviews for this product. I'm sorry, but who's buying an adult fun toy and then like clicking a star rating? Women. Really? Why not? You need to know if it's good or not. Okay, right. Helping out the sisterhood.

Let me know what you think. We think we could make a real difference for women around the world. And you know, I'm like, I'm all about empowering women and like. Yeah. Yeah. Megan, the Empress is the most talked about sex toy on Instagram. 154 US dollars it goes for. Oh my God.

Over 200 New Zealand dollars. So here's my question. I don't really want to be, I don't really want to be putting up videos. So I've already solved your problem as to how you do this. Because they want you to post on your Instagram something about that you've used the Empress. I guess endorsing. Endorsing the Empress.

So this is my idea. Click the music. So imagine black. So you can't see anything. This is a video on Instagram. I guess endorsing endorsing the Empress so this is my idea okay so imagine black yep okay so you can't see anything this is a video on Instagram it's gonna slowly fade in

yep and it's gonna be a close up on Megan's face okay okay but it starts out as black right excuse me

slow fade to Megan's face her hair is a mess okay like she is shambles like her mascara's run Her eyeliner's She's got a little bit of snot On her nose

Her lips are skewed But it's smeared on her face So to black I'll be playing the role of Megan Okay is there a light mist Of sweat on her face No it's just Running off her face

Okay Okay so Black Yeah Noise will start Imagine about Three or four seconds in No, it's just running off her face. Okay. Okay, so black. Yeah. Noise will start. Imagine about three or four seconds in is when the fade starts to happen up. So it starts black. And this is where that starts coming at you. And you see her face is slowly and you're like, oh, my God, what's happened?

Is she okay? It looks like she's been running from a bad guy. And she's like, oh, my God. Oh, Jesus. Sweet Jesus. Mom. Mom. Mom. Are you saying mom?

No, nothing. Nothing. Just. Right. Okay. Five stars. Doesn't cover it. And then collapse.

Right. Fade to black. Logo. Logo. The Empress. Maybe a voiceover. No voiceover. You know who needs to do the voiceover.

Oh, shit. Okay. And then James comes in and all he says is the Empress. Go, hit it, James. I think you need to bring him in. No, I don't think you do need to bring him in. I'm just thinking Mingus. No, no, no.

Give him the last, like, force. Yeah. The Empress. Yes! Nailed it. We got it. God, I hope we all get a free one now. Book the video team.

We'll do it at work. No. Book the video team. I think we've wasted them, Radia. We really need an ad agency. This is the modern day mad men. Like, people would just... I must know more.

You would never let me live this down if I post about a... If you didn't... A next toy. A FT. If you didn't do it like that, I wouldn't let me live this down if I post about a... If you didn't... A FT. If you didn't do it like that, I wouldn't let you live it down. Don't just be like, hi, guys. Me again. I've just really... Can I say the word?

No, probably not. If you're worrying about it, maybe don't. Guys, I've just been pleasuring myself. That's as clean as I can get. Okay. I just wanted to let you know about it? Yeah. Maybe don't. If you're worrying about it. Guys, I've just been pleasuring myself. That's as clean as it can get. Okay. I just wanted to let you know about it. That's hashtag.

By the by, you get lost in the junk. Yeah. Hashtag spawns though. Black and white. You got a hashtag spawns. Fade in from black. That's like,

oh, blah, blah. Like, people are like, is it pleasure? Is it pain? What's wrong with her? Is she exhausted? I don't like promoting anything unless I've actually like, is it pleasure? Is it pain? What's wrong with her?

Is she exhausted? I don't like promoting anything unless I've actually, like, used it. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. The United, I didn't know this was even a thing, but the United Nations World Tourism Organization. Did you know that was a thing? The what? The United Nations World Tourism Organization. I did not that was a thing? The what? The United Nations World Tourism Organization.

I did not. Well, it's a thing. And they have released an annual report detailing countries where tourism has grown the most. And it's kind of a list of maybe some up-and-coming destinations that you can get into before it becomes like Croatia or Dubrovnik or most places in Europe. So you can say, oh, I went there before it went popular. Yeah, that kind of thing. Up 51%. And I thought maybe we could go through this list because it might give you some ideas.

Okay. Because a lot of places doing early bird, doing their travel expos and their early bird specials for Europe. I saw that flights are cheap at the moment. But like, it's October. So even if you're moment. But like, that's like, it's October. So even if you're booking for next year, that's like eight months away. Gotta get in early. But you gotta get your leave in early.

Gotta get your flights in early. Gotta get your leave in before everybody else at work. Yeah. That's absolutely key. Ecuador is up 51%. Ecuador, does that ever, has that tickled your fancy? I don't really know anything about Ecuador.

Galapagos Islands? That's kind of big. I haven't been to the, I've been to Quito, the capital, which is like higher than Mount Ruapehu. It's like 2,800 metres, the city. Is that hard to breathe? Yeah, it is. You get a bit, like it takes you a couple of days to get used to it.

But a lot of people, yeah, people can get altitude sickness. But is that where you go to Ecuador to get to the Galapagos? You can go through there, yeah, but it's kind of, Galapagos is on the coast, obviously, because of the islands. But apparently that has topped the list for 2018 with a jump 1.6 to 2.42 million visitors.

And that's one of the biggest in South America. Really? For visitors. Iran is up in the past year, 49.9%. See, I would love to go there. Because your dad went through Iran, right?

I talked to him at the weekend about it. He went all through Afghanistan, Iran. This was in the 70s before. I mean, there's always been a lot of troubles in that area. But yeah, you could just go. And it's beautiful. But if you go to Iran, North Korea, and you want to go to America, and you've got those stamps in your passport,

they're going to put on the rubber gloves. What is that? Because they don't like that you've gone there. Right. Find it hard to get in there. 7.3 million visitors to Iran. Egypt is up 36% in the past year. Uganda is up 31.9%.

What's in Uganda for tourists? I don't know. Those big gorillas in the mist. Is that Uganda? I thought that was... Oh, yeah. You got that. The popular destination.

I was going to say it's Kenya, but it's actually the forest that borders Kenya and Uganda. It has the Bawindi Impenetrable... Wait a minute. Bawindi Impenetrable National Park Which is massive For yeah Gorillas Right Nepal

Nepal up for tourists 24% in the last year Oh yeah Hiking Hiking yeah Had a friend that did that Over like last Christmas Tingis did it

Did you see it Yeah Amazing You can like actually Get people to carry your packs too My wife's Mother went to Nepal Yeah

And she said Kathmandu That's in Nepal Yeah You can actually get people to carry your packs too. My wife's mother went to Nepal. Yeah. And she said, Kathmandu, that's in Nepal, eh? Yeah. The most polluted place she's ever been. Yeah, right. Really? Everyone gets air sickness. If you've got asthma, it triggers on like day one.

She said everyone else would get like some sort of lung illness while she's there. She just couldn't get over it. Because, you know, when you think of Nepal, you think of like the mountains and green and snow-capped, everything. But she said like the city was crazy polluted. Well, yeah, they had the earthquake

in 2015. Apparently, they're still rebuilding but a lot of tourist stuff is in place. Slovenia is up 23% for travel in the last year.

So Slovenia, apparently, with its mountain landscapes, great food, little villages, beautiful rivers like a budget Switzerland. I was going to say and cheap.

And cheap. Because it's Eastern European, right? Yeah, exactly. Because Switzerland's mega expensive. So if you want to do that on the budget, apparently Slovenia, I've never been, that's one of the places to go. Palestinian territories are up 20.5% in the last year.

And Vietnam up 19.9% in the last year. So same with Georgia. Apparently that's really underrated, but it's a beautiful place georgia the rugby world cup country yeah that's the only time i've ever mentioned i heard georgia mentioned yeah just there are minnow in the rugby world cup ex-russian state like it was part of the ussr right i believe so and then when they all broke apart again it became yeah its own country yes five million visitors in the last year compared to like Australia who has like nine million a year. And South Korea as well. Yeah.

So those are kind of the biggest up and comers. Well, everyone wants to see South Korea before Kim Jong-un blows it to pieces. So I can see why everyone's rushing to get there. For sure. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six. Hello and welcome to today's Top Six. We're dealing with the fact that census results tells us 50% of school kids, Kiwi kids, commute to school in a private automobile.

How did you get to school, Megan? Oh, I biked and then private automobile when I got one. When I got one. So your parents didn't drop you off? Oh, sometimes if I was feeling lazy. Right. When I died, I'd take my dad's car with drizzling. Okay, but most of the time you'd ride, which is amazing because you're not good on a bicycle.

No, because I actually hit a curb and hurt myself. So then I started walking to school, but it was a long walk. Right. 50 minutes. Bit of a walk. Yeah. Downhill. No, not downhill. On the way to school, but it was a long walk. As I say, yeah. 50 minutes. Bit of a walk. Yeah. Downhill. Super fits though.

No, not downhill. On the way to school. Oh, yeah, and then the way home. Big hill. Yeah, big hill. Yeah. Big hill to finish. What about you?

Were you in the country? School bus. School bus. Right. Took the rural school bus. Yeah, but once you hit the age of being able to, like, have a licence, did you get a car? There was a car, but nah, not all the time. Mum started working in town, so there'd be the odd time where we'd muck around and get a ride home with her.

But she didn't like that because she didn't know what we were up to between school furnishing and when she left work. You weren't to be trusted. I had to bike about probably four or five k's across town. Might have even been six, like it was a long way. Mine would have been like lots of k's too. Through the roughest neighbourhoods? No, just the main road. Do you have to do jumps off the

curb to escape the local hoodlums? Sometimes I'd do skids and Dad would get angry because I'd wear my tyres down. So I'd do sweet skids. Yeah, we had different coloured bike tyres. My brother had red, I had black. I think my sister had blue, so Dad knew who was doing skids,

so he knew who to wallop. Is that why they got us coloured tyres? Yeah, so they knew who was doing the skids. Yeah, because I had blue tyres. Jump on your brother's bike, do a big skid. Did you have one of those cool, like, meaty helmets that you could put stickers on the side? Remember those helmets you could put,

they had different coloured stickers and you could put them on the side. I had a pink one. They're, like, meaty helmets that you could put stickers on the side? Remember those helmets you could put, they had different coloured stickers and you could put them on the side? I had a pink one. They're, like, really bright. Yeah. It was, like, pink and yellow and green. You would have looked a real special unit back in school.

Ouch. We wore helmets, though. Well, the top six ways to get to school that's not a car. It's school holidays at the moment. Yeah. But maybe after school, after school holidays, going back to school,

you could look into this if you're a school kid or if you're a parent, look into it for your school kid. Number six, a contraption that you spent your school holidays building. Did you ever build something? Did you ever have like a school holiday project? Like a go-kart. We're building a go-kart. Yeah, that was so much fun.

And you get the wheels and you bolt them on with the U-nails. Yeah. Or it was generally just something balanced on my brother's skateboard that you like rode on. That was a hot play.

Using an existing vehicle and just strapping things. Like if you had two skateboards and you like joined them together with a bit of wood to make a mega skateboard. Yeah. It was a good idea.

That was great. Easier to balance on than a standard skateboard too. Yeah. Number five on the list of the top six ways to get to school that's not a car. Pogo stick. That was a hard work.

A very hard work. Great core. You'll have abs by lunchtime. Yeah. Take a long time. A long time. Would it almost be quicker to walk? Yeah, but you don't.

Less energy. You can't appreciate walking until you've pogoed. Yeah, okay. True, true. The ease of walking isn't appreciated until there's been pogoing. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six ways to get to school that's not a car. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think this is still a pretty cool way to get around.

Rollerblades. Are they still cool? Is everyone still pretty down with the blades? I prefer roller skating. Four wheels are better than... You get away with rollerblading, rollererskating these days, but rollerblading still gets an eyebrow up, doesn't it? What's going on here?

And what's worse were those rollerblades that only had one big ball wheel at the front and one big ball wheel at the back. Yeah. Did you ever see those? No. In the 90s? And they had a hard arch between them so you could grind some rails, dude. Oh, cool. Gnarly. Yeah, man. Tie that hoodie around your sweatshirt.

Tie that hoodie around your waist. Yeah. Turn your hat backwards and grind the gnar on your rollerblades. All while wearing a no-fair t-shirt. Yes. Number three on the list of the top six ways to get to school that isn't a car. A golf cart. Oh, yes.

If you lived within Kui, that'd be a great way to get to school. I had a friend that had one modified. had to put seatbelts on it, and a license, this is in America though, and license plates, and then could just drive it around the town. What? How fast did it go? Just golf cart speed. Maybe.

But you could drive on the streets. Did they go up to like 50? No. No, maybe like 30 max. Okay. 25, 30. Absolute max. Yeah.

But so, so cool. Yeah. Do you put gas in those? No, they're electric. Oh. So you're saving them, aren't you? Yeah. I know.

You just charge them up when you get home. Number two on the list of the top six ways to get to school that's not a car. Stay with me here. This is going to get... You're going to have to use your imagination, but imagine you know like a train. Yeah. How lots of people go on it. Yeah.

It's not like a private vehicle. Yeah. So, but rather than, because I understand trains are fairly restricted. This train can go on the road. Right. And it stops at different places and people get onto this road train. Why don't we do that? And it kind of has a predetermined route, but obviously easier than a rail,

because rail, we have to build the rail, but these will use existing roads. Sounds too futuristic. They get on, and they get driven to school, and then they get off the road train. That would save all the private vehicle trips, wouldn't it? And heaps of people can go on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you, Elon Musk? This is such a

crazy idea. It's out there. Yeah. It'd take everybody sort of banding together. Yeah, and supporting it. I don't think that would work. Yeah. You're being silly. Alright. Nah, nah. It was ridiculous. You could have double-decker ones too. Oh, I used to remember that. There's no reason why not.

What's that? I used to remember the bus. You're so facetious. Did you seriously only just. What's that? Are you talking about a bus? You're so facetious. Did you seriously only just cotton under the fact we're talking about a bus? Oh, my God, Megan. I thought you were in on it. I thought you were in on it. Why don't we do that? She said.

We do. It's called a bus. Oh, my God. I thought you were playing along. No, because I was thinking one with multiple carriages. Pretty sure everybody. They have those too, the Bendy buses. Yeah, okay.

That's real smart. People should take those more often. They do. Wow. You should support the buses. Remember like a few minutes ago when I said that was how I got to school, like 90% of the time? Oh, yeah.

All right. And number one on the list of the top six ways to got to school like 90% of the time? Oh yeah. Alright. And number one on the list of the top six ways to get to school that's not a car a blow cart. Because it teaches you to use the wind.

Yes. And to do the directional stuff. It's like a little boat but it's on wheels and we're going to need all the help we can get in the upcoming America's Cup.

So why not start training them. Provide your own. God do I have to come up with all the solutions. That's today's top six Well the news Has

Officially What Has it been Yep It was the embargo pass Yeah The embargo was like Two in the morning or something

So we're allowed to say We're allowed to let the secret Out of the bag I don't want to upset these people I know I know you don't You sound really concerned. Taco Bell has announced it's going to be opening its very first New Zealand restaurant in the Brickworks.

This is in Lin Mall in Newland in West Auckland. So the first one in New Zealand will be Lin Mall. Yes. Lin Mall. Lin Mall. That's a real departure from fast food restaurants and donut stores opening their first stores in South Auckland. Well, there's two places you open a fast food place to check it out. South Auckland and West Auckland.

And if it's in West Auckland, you put it on Lincoln Road. That's just a fact. It's what you do. There's like 50 places. There's more than that. Takeaway Road. It's nuts. Takeaway Mile.

It's crazy how many takeaways are on Lincoln Road. And in South Auckland, yeah, there's that. One will always pop up in South Auckland as well. I know so many people are so excited about Taco Bell opening, but I'm just going to go out there and say I've had it overseas and I do not rate it at all. It's disgusting. It's really bad.

Like I've given it so many chances when I've been in America or overseas. I'm like, well, give it a go because everyone talks about it. Yeah. But I just think we're so, I don't know if we're so like lucky with our dine-in Mexican restaurant. We've got some great Mexican restaurants. Like we've got fantastic, you have a taco at a place like Mexico or any of the places in New Zealand.

You're like, wow, great. Yeah. You have one from there and you're like, it's just, I mean, there's a reason they're a dollar. Yeah. And well, it's fast. It's super fast food, isn't it? It's a vibe mean, there's a reason they're a dollar. Yeah. Well, it's fast. It's super fast food, isn't it? That's the vibe.

You go for a place somewhere for a gourmet burger. Yep. And then you eat just like a sloppy, cheap burger from a takeaway place like they're cheapest on offer

and it's never as good as the gourmet burger. So they're just filling that gap, right? So have they said what early November? They've been keeping this secret,

haven't they? Mmm. Early November. A month away. this secret, haven't they? Early November. A month away. It's going to have an open kitchen layout, so you're going to be able to see your meals being prepared. Okay. Am I a bad person? All right.

Received some email correspondence. Someone's in a pickle. They'll remain anonymous, but let's see if we can help them out and get our judgy pants on. Now, so they messaged him because yesterday we talked about Ansel or Al, what's his name? Al Gort. Yeah, Ansel or Al Gort. Yeah, Fodden Our Stars, Baby Driver.

Yeah. So that's how they start the email with reference to that. Right. So hey guys, I heard you talking about Ansel Al Gort's different relationship. So Ansel said that he wants to stay with his girlfriend, who he loves, and sexually could stay with her forever, being the one. But he wants to fall in love with other people.

He wants to be able to... Yeah, but he doesn't want to have sex with those other people. No. He just wants to be in love with them, which we thought that just meant... Just having close friends. Yeah. Lots of people messaged in and said that's polyamory.

It doesn't always have to be of a sexual nature. But I know that I thought polyamory was when you're in a relationship with multiple people. Well, I guess you are, but it doesn't always have to be sexual. If you love someone, I guess, right? Yeah. Okay, is it practice or desire for intimate relationships with more than one partner

with the consent of all partners involved just thinking of my current situation of monogamy which is a hard wood it's a hard wood

hard rich wood but you imagine being a polyamorous person in one house and deciding to do renos like the two of us disagree enough

about what we're doing like paint colours and stuff imagine if there were like a panel of people weighing in. Yeah. No, I don't want arctic white. I want soft black white. Well, it's hard enough choosing with one person.

Tell me, it's so amazing how many whites there are. There are so many whites! But even what to have for dinner. Like, that's... And what if one of them was like... You'd put one person in charge every night of the week. One person's dairy-free, one person's gluten-free, another's vegan.

I could have been in a relationship with anyone with two higher dietary requirements. Okay, so polyamory isn't for you then. There's multiple reasons polyamory isn't for me. I'm always tired for a start. They'd be having fun without me. That was Ansel's relationship we were talking about yesterday. So this person said, and I thought maybe you could help me.

My boyfriend is awesome. We've been together a couple of years and I love him so much, but he is really vanilla in the bedroom. I've spoken to him about some of my desires and needs and he's just not into it. He says that I satisfy him, and he's just not that adventurous. Right. So I guess my question is,

am I a bad person for wanting to satisfy my desires elsewhere? I love him. I want to stay with him, but I just need a little something more in that respect if you catch my drift. I don't know how to even bring this conversation up and I don't think he'll want me to. What do I do? Right. So he's a bit vanilla in the bedroom and he doesn't

want to be spiced up with chocolate sauce and nuts. Why you always go to food? She said vanilla. She said vanilla. And so I'm like, how do you spice up a vanilla ice cream? It's an analogy children. It's poetry. Sprinkle Milo on it. Oh, I thought like, how do you spice up a vanilla ice cream? It's an analogy, children. Milo. It's poetry. Sprinkle Milo on it. Oh, I thought you actually took that chocolate sauce and sprinkled.

I don't think she's a bad person. Yeah, but like. But then would you be? Yeah. Someone could get hurt in this scenario. I mean, you're a bad person if you do it behind his back. But if he said, this is the extent of my adventurous nature, but you want to hike Everest. Yep.

Then I'll let you have a few weeks to hike Everest. Exactly. He can say, well, hike Everest. But has he done like... Don't bring home any... Smaller trails? Yes, he's. Has he tried hiking on...

Yeah, I see what you're saying. Like maybe he thinks he's just a flat walk guy. Yeah, but took a little hill in and he might be like, okay. And you've got to start with a hill. You can't go straight to Everest, can you? No. You scare them off if you go straight to Everest. You run an oxygen if you go straight to Everest.

She does need to have a chat with him, but it does feel like she needs some satisfaction from elsewhere. So does that make her a bad person? I don't think so. And they have discussed it a bit, like she's obviously said to him. I know, but knowing that he's vanilla and he's like, this is Mike, this is where I draw

the line. If she has that conversation, he's just gonna, that's not gonna go down well. He's gonna freak out. Okay, well this is where we need your help. 0800 dials at M. Give us a call. You can text 9696. Is she a bad person?

For wanting to satisfy her desires elsewhere. And you know what? Maybe you've been in the situation where you've been with someone and you're like, well, they're not satisfying me in that regard. How did you sort that out? Or did you just have to get out of the relationship? Yeah. Because maybe it is just a compatibility thing.

What's the word when your desire or your need doesn't match your partner? Incompatibility. No. Your libido doesn't match your partner. Oh, yeah. Out of whack. Incompatible libido. Okay. 0800 1000 M.

You can text 9696. Give us a call. We missed a real trick not playing Missy Elliot, get your freak on in the back room can we do that when we come back sure

yes am I a bad person alright so if you've just joined us a quick recap for am I a bad person somebody needs our help and we need your opinion

my boyfriend's awesome we've been together a couple years I love him so much he's really vanilla in the bedroom she's spoken to him about her desires and needs

but he's not into it he's not that adventurous. So her question is, is she a bad person for wanting to satisfy her desires elsewhere? Okay, so what do you think? Lily, good morning.

Morning. Is she a bad person? No, no, definitely not a bad person. I mean, she's spoken to her boyfriend and he's not willing to compromise. I mean,

relationships are about compromise. If he's not willing to compromise. I mean, relationship's about compromise. If he's not willing to give it a go, why not? Okay, so do you think that she should be allowed to go out of the relationship, if he's okay with that, to have some fun? Oh, definitely. I mean, what I'm saying is, you know, why can't he try?

I mean, yeah, he may know his boundaries, but why not push him a little bit? Don't knock it till he tries. If he doesn't like it or not, you know, he's going to try it and like it or not. So why not? That's what I was saying with the try the small tricks first before you go up Mount Everest. You've got to be willing. I mean, if he's not, then I don't blame him at all for wanting it elsewhere.

You train for a marathon. You don't just like Jump on into it Would you have a walk you recommend in the first step out Megan? No, no, just jump Just jump Lily Just get straight into it Lily's like get into it

No I agree, why not eh She's got to talk to it You can have fun right and if you're not having fun in a relationship Then what's the point You're so right. You're not right. I've just had an update of our poll, which is on FBM.

Is she a bad person? 55% saying no. 45% yes. Is that kind of the feedback you're getting text-wise? It's pretty close, though. It's close. Text has been, the people who are saying not a bad person

have articulated why a bit better than the people who are saying yes, no, that she is a bad person. Someone said not a bad person. This may a bit better than the people who are saying that she is a bad person. Someone said not a bad person. This may be one of the many reasons why polyamory is becoming a lot more popular. Because there was always, if you were involved in this, you had to do it in secret. Yeah. So that was why affairs happened rather than an understanding between two adults.

And as a society, we've definitely got a lot more progressive and open, haven't we? Totally. But there's still a taboo about that because we're always taught, you get married and that's it. That's your person. Until you marry the next one. They say, we've had this conversation. Okay. The only thing that would make it bad is if she didn't have the conversation first and

it sounds like she's tried. And obviously she would have to have the conversation about the next step before doing it. The reason why some people cheat is not being able to openly communicate. This monogamy is great but it doesn't work for everybody. Yeah, and there are people that believe that monogamy isn't a thing.

That they don't believe in it. Because the way we're wired is humans. Someone said, I'm a guy. I've been through the same situation. I just couldn't continue sleeping alone. Love her very much,

but she's not into any romance in the bedroom whatsoever. Or adventures. Oh, okay. So why not just go out, have some fun, come back? So that was part of it. Megan's like, no, you're not going anywhere.

Oh, that's not for me. But then... You're satisfied. Yeah. I don't have that. Matt writes, would we be so understanding if a bloke had written this email? I like to think we would have been. Yeah, I think so. Yeah.

Yeah, because we're very progressive in it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't understand the confusion there. I wait for my boring partner to leave and then get the box of fun out. That was a suggestion I wanted to make to the person. But then that's not like human contact, is it? Then she gets the human contact and otherwise from him.

But she's got her box of toys. I mean, if you miss the show at 6.10, Megan has been approached to be a social media influencer For an adult fun toy So she's already changed her tune I haven't said no just yet Good Open minds

She's not a bad person But going elsewhere is going to cause drama Yeah Overall like you can't You can't just not talk about it and then go to someone else. No, no, no. It's just the communication.

Just don't cheat. That's not what this person has said, though. Yeah. That was never on the radar. Ho, ho, ho. Ooh, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Ho, ho, ho, ho. Well, it is 81 days, 16 hours and 32 minutes until Christmas Day.

Whee! That is going so fast. Like it's the 4th of October today. It's October. It's moving. So that means three weeks until your Christmas trees are up. Yeah, that's what I was just trying to work out. Three weeks until I put my Christmas tree up.

At the end of October. Wow, we've had spottings, sightings of Christmas. Christmas has been spotted. And internationally as well. In South Africa. Oh, okay. In South Africa, it's Christmas on the horizon too. ShopRite.

ShopRite. I don't know. Heard of ShopRite? I don't know. Heard of ShopRite? My family love it when you do this accent. I had to Google ShopRite. Do they actually or was that sarcastic? You know, weirdly they do. Because I would have thought it was racist.

But sure. It's not racist. It blasts in South Africa, you know. Right. Racism. It's all a bit blurry over here. Yeah. The ShopRite is Africa's largest food retailer. Oh, okay. you know right racism it's all a bit blurry over here yeah the shop right

is Africa's largest food retailer oh okay so it's like their countdown it's got 2,934 outlets across 15 countries

in Africa okay okay pretty good time on the stock market too it's just gone up a little bit but I had to google

what it was shop right have got the Christmas tree ads on you can stop on the stock market too. Of course. It's just gone up a little bit. I'll be right to Google what it was. ShopRite have got the Christmas tree ads on. You can stop. You don't need to keep the voice all the time. It's got the presents. Yeah.

You know what's in the presents? Nothing. Mr. Sweetie Man. Ah, no, nothing. Yeah, but they've got the Christmas tree up with the Christmas presents outside.

Too early for a Christmas tree in a mall or store or anything. Unless it's display for sale, which we're seeing. Somebody has sent this in. Let me get close to my computer screen. Their profile picture has got F45 in the background. So they're fitter than you. Came out of Hastings.

Well, I don't follow them. I just got a screen cap. But presumably the post either side was that heart rate monitor everybody who goes to F45 puts on their Instagram daily. Came out of Hastings has got a lot of Christmas. This looks like Rappi Baba and also tea towels. Christmas tea towels. Oh, lovely.

Bit of Christmas tea towel on the horizon. That's the first spotting of a Christmas kitchen. I should get my mum some new tea towels. Oh, lovely. Bit of Christmas tea towel on the horizon. That's the first spotting of a Christmas kitchen. I should get my mum some new tea towels, mum and dad, because do your parents use their tea towels until they're nearly dead? You wouldn't believe the state a tea towel has to be in before it gets... I went to use a tea towel at the weekend,

and it was half of it, and it was thin, and there were holes in it. Oh, you can hold it up and see through it, eh? It's just almost translucent. No, they don't need anything new until it's literally gone or dead. Like everything. I'm just like, oh, God. Is this the world they grew up in, though?

It just shows how wasteful our generations are. Oh, for sure. But you're like, this detail, no. I don't even like the look of it. Burn it. I couldn't even get the jug lid open. And I'm like, you need a new jug. And they're like, no, you just put your finger in the latch and open the. Oh, my God. I was't even like the look of it. Burn it. I couldn't even get the jug lid open. And I'm like, you need a new jug. And they're like, no, you just put your finger in the latch and open the...

Oh, my God. I was like, no. What if it's in the latch? This is where the boiling water is. No, it's where to fill it up. So it's cold. Now you know what to get them for Christmas. New jug.

A jug. Yeah. I love it. Yeah, sure. My parents had the same jug for like forever. Yep. And they finally got a new jug because the old one had that green like calcium deposit stuff.

Real bad. Real thick. It was more calcium than it was steel. Yeah. And they hated the new jug. Yeah, I was about to say, they hate it. It's just not the same. They've been through like three jugs in like two years.

Oh, okay. This jug. How particular can you be about a jug? Like you push the button, it boils and it turns itself off. Bloody rubbish. Oh, okay. This jug saw them. How particular can you be about a jug? Like, you push the button, it boils, and it turns itself off. Bloody rubbish. Takes too long. That was what Mum would say. Let's get back to Christmas penetration.

Some has been spotted in Parnell. Alyssa sent this in walking past a very ooh-la-la. It looks like it's called galleons. Oh, yeah. They've got those Christmas trees that are like really expensive, but look rubbish. Do you know what I'm talking about? It's not like you get a cheap Christmas tree these days

and it's lush with branches. This is very sparse branches and not in the traditional shape. Minimalist, maybe? Maybe. Nordic-y, maybe? Yeah, because their Christmas trees over there are weird. Yeah, but it's like, hey guys, we're so rich, we like to have rubbish looking Christmas trees.

I don't get it, but I also don't understand being rich. Hillcrest, Hamilton, the warehouse today, Douglas has sent in a picture of some newly stocked Christmas shelves. We've got decorative stockings. We've got hats. We've got Christmas-scented candles. Oh, okay. Christmas-scented candles.

And finally, to the Hawke's Bay. Hawke's Bay, born and proud, as some page. They've shared the Christmas Wonderland. Hawke's Bay is open. It's beautiful and it's a must visit. Pop in and visit them on Joel Road and Havelock North. Oh, lovely. They do have a lot of Christmas ornaments.

Their Christmas ornaments alone and the size of that shop and how much they've got packed in there alone has a lot to do with the latest reading of Christmas Penetration. Let's have a look. Comet Cupid, Polish the sleigh. Right now, Christmas Penetration is at... 57%. Oh, it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

And if you see any reports of Christmas creeping in early, FBMZM on Facebook, send us your snaps. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. We are joined on the phone by a man who might be able to help us in our endeavour to no longer be Nelson's 13th favourite radio breakfast programme, marketing and business lecturer, Kev. Good morning. Good morning to you guys.

What do we do? Do we need to... I think we need to increase our, what do you, Mark, Brand awareness? Our brand, yes. Your brand awareness, that's most important. That's the first thing to target. I win.

I get an A. You win. Yeah, so what you've got to think with your brand awareness, really, is if I say the seven Ps, does this mean anything to you? The seven Ps? Yeah, so what you've got to think with your brand awareness really is, if I say the seven Ps, does this mean anything to you? The seven Ps? The ones that specifically connect to what you're doing and what you're offering is people. Okay.

So we know that ZM is more than just a radio station, right? So you want people to connect with people at ZM. So we need somebody with a personality is that the second thing no no it's not although it is a p good that's a b plus for you yes so wait a minute what was the p personality or people people it's a people okay all right okay so what's the next p you need to get people to relate to you and relate to your brand. So Nelson's quite, and I understand what we're talking about Nelson here, it's quite a way, it's kind of remote.

So you need the other P as well, which is physical evidence. So you need to be in Nelson at some point to, here comes another P, promote your offer and your station. Excuse me, did you all hear me say promote before? Yeah, you did. That's another A. Okay, so get to Nelson physically. Okay, right.

Get to Nelson physically and you need to be seen. You need visibility. Okay. That's a V. Now that's a V. Yeah, I know. I know. We're straight away from the P's now.

We're going through the alphabet. Yeah. And there's something called societal marketing. Have you come across this term? No. Okay. So, I may be pushing it now.

Right. This is where you can provide a service, if you like, for the community. So, Think Community. Okay.

Now, there's about 50,000-ish, 50,000 people in Nelson, I understand. Yeah. So, they're very, very community-based. So, if you could provide some kind of give-back, I understand. Yeah. So they're very, very community-based.

So if you could provide some kind of give back, some kind of care. An idea that comes to mind, maybe a free hacky sack event. A free what event? Hacky sack, because they love hacky sacks, don't they? Oh, yeah, yeah. I was also thinking of maybe you could give some radios away. Yeah. Here's the thing.

You give the radio away, but guess which is the only station it can get. Yes. This was one of my ideas. You rip the knob off. You give them the radio station, you rip the knob off. Yeah. Only on ZM. Winner.

Could we run another couple of our ideas past you, Keith? Yeah, sure. Another one we thought of was bribing people with a dollar. We give everybody a dollar to listen. Bribery, a good marketing tactic. Okay, good. That's spot on. I use that with my students.

I know that. Okay. It does work. You need about $50,000. How's your budget? Yeah, that's the problem. But that would be everybody getting a dollar, wouldn't it? Okay, well, you know, I've done a bit of research on this,. But that would be everybody getting a dollar, wouldn't it? Okay, well,

you know, I've done a bit of research on this, and you need to be out in the streets, so I think you three need to go down to Nelson.

And I understand there's about 10% of Nelsonites, if that's what they're called, actually take to the streets every day. They jog, they walk to work.

And this is compared with 2.9% in the rest of New Zealand. So if you are out there physically on the streets, giving things away, being seen, increasing your visibility, you're going to get to that community and people. So I think you should jump on a plane and get down there. Well, Kiv, thanks.

We've got some solid leads to follow now. We appreciate your time. Thank you so much. You're welcome. I'm all get started. I'm all get started. Get started. Don't get flesh started. Ha! Thank you so much. You're welcome. Just another reminder that we're going to see the Black Eyed Peas at Friday Jams live soon.

Oh, yes. It's coming up fast. I hope they do that for us, that intro. That would be so great. Well, I'm in two minds. Do we tell them about it or they might want a cut? They might sell us. A cut of all the money that we're getting out of it.

True. A great way actually to get to Friday Jams, given its central location at Western Springs, would be on a lime scooter. Yeah. You can lime there. It's so handy, wouldn't it? Yeah.

Megan, what do you think? You've Limed a few times. What do you think of Lime? What do you think? This is a bit of interest to me. What do you think of the app? Oh, it's good. It's efficient.

Not Apple D-App from the Black Eyed Peas. I'm talking about the Lime app. The Lime app. It's efficient. It takes money off your credit card. You know, it's all loaded up. It's like an Uber, but on a scooter. I've never had problems with it. Fime it. It's efficient. It takes money off your credit card. You know, it's all loaded up. It's like an Uber, but on a scooter. I've never had problems with it.

Fletch, have you? Well, funny you say. Got any thoughts on it? You know I've got thoughts on it because I arrived this morning and I was bitching about it. Were you? What's your issue? So, I will use a lime most mornings on my way to work

and I will park it outside the building. And if you've ever used lime before, you'll know that when you stop using it, you have to lock your lime and take a photo of it. Yeah, you're like, I'm done. I'm done here. Well, several times, especially lately, I'll go to lock it, and it doesn't...

There must be something with the location. It's like you can't park here and I'm like, I can park here because I always park here. You think I'm somewhere else in the city and it needs to think about it.

It's wearing over and sometimes I'll shut the app and I'll go back in and then it's like, oh, you can park here because you're in a parking area. In the meantime, it's charging me a couple of cents, sure, while it's messing around.

Even taking the photo takes five seconds. Again, it's all money I'm being charged. So what? Well, so I had enough this morning. Did you take matters into your own hands? I one-starred my ride and in the comments I said, I do not appreciate that this took 30 seconds for me to lock my scooter. I want a refund for that 30 seconds.

Do you actually say that? Do you hear yourself? Because every morning, Megan, this adds up. If this was a whole year of taking five to 30 seconds to lock up and it's charging me, that could be $5. Oh, my God. How much would 30 seconds actually cost you? It's like at the supermarket, when I buy anything with a stalk on it, like the tomatoes, I'll

pick it off. Because in your mind, you're adding it all up every time. You imagine over the course of your lifetime, you take all the little stalk. How much are you spending on tomato stalks? Stalk of the tomatoes. That could be $10, $20. Oh, my God.

$30. Wastage. Adds up. Such wastage. Well, you might all think I'm going to find this message. Hang on. It's in my bin. I got an email back from them.

Thanks for reaching out to Lime Customer Service. We're really sorry that you had this experience. We will immediately research your request for a refund and any refund will be in seven to ten business days. They're going to refund me.

Brilliant. Can't wait for that. This is a win for the small guy. How do you value... Fifteen cents to come in. How do you value your time? It's a principle of it. Because I always think...

Why value it? No, but I always put an hourly rate on my time spent doing anything. No, this was not... Because I literally did it from the walk from the front door to the studio this morning. I did it. Bang. So I wasted no time doing this. Because you did it in transit.

But I... It was time you would have wasted otherwise by not doing something productive. But I'm saving money. God, I wish I'd been there when you were trying to park it because you were that angry at that point. Oh, God, I was so... That you were writing an email. Well, and because at 5am it's very cold outside,

I don't have time to be dilly-dallying with an app that's unresponsive for 5 to 30 seconds. You think he's being silly, but he's not. He's very. He's 100% serious. Wound up. I've won today. I'm the consumer.

Good on you. I feel like I've gone to fair go and I've got my insurance payout. That's how I feel. Hey, if you feel good, that's all that matters. You didn't really win because the best part of going to fair go is probably meeting Pippa Wetzel. You didn't meet Pippa Wetzel. And don't forget Hayden.

He's lovely. I've forgotten Hayden. Don't forget Hayden. He's lovely. I'm sure he's lovely, but he's no Pippa Wetzel. Right, okay. You can get a Lime scooter to go and meet Pippa and Hayden. Just up the road. But beware, TVNZ's right over the road from that actual no park zone, so sometimes

you can't actually get off your scooter and leave it there. You mean ride a flash park. Okay. Oh, don't. Oh, Fletch has seen it and he's throwing up his face. I said to the producers, Fletch is going to be like,

no, don't be a dick. I'm not going to look. Fletch is going to be like, not a hit. So I didn't ask you. Okay. So it's topical. Do you know the song?

Okay, go on. The artist is topical. Stop screwing up your face. I'm just trying, I just don't know this song. Well, that says more about you. It is the debut single from this person. And that will make you feel old

because... Oh, it was number six in New Zealand. Yeah. What's wrong with that? You've done worse. What year is this from? 2009. Okay, you're true, true.

2009. I do know this song. Okay. This song was from an EP. So debut EP. So that means it was like their first single. They didn't have an album out. Yeah.

Right, okay. The voice has changed a lot. I think Puberty would have done that maybe. Yeah. But 612 million views on YouTube. And if you didn't appreciate it at the time, I feel like we appreciate it more maybe now. And it's topical.

Yeah. This person got married this week. Fleetch, was it you that said we now live in a world where this's topical. Yeah. This person got married this week. Fletch, was it you that said we now live in a world where this person is married? Yeah. It's weird on so many levels. But he's Canadian.

He's now married. And this is Justin Bieber's first ever single. One time on CDM. Now them butterflies in my stomach won't stop, stop And even though it's a struggle, love is all we got So we gon' keep, keep climbin' to the mountain top Your, your world is my world And my fight is your fight My breath is your breath

And your heart, and your life Girl, you're my one love, my one heart, my one life for sure Let me tell you one time, I'ma tell you one time And I'ma be your one guy, you'll be my number one girl Always making time for you, I'ma tell you one time I'ma tell you one time, I'ma tell you one time You look so deep, you know that it humbles me You're by my side, them troubles, them that trouble me

Many have called, but the chosen is you Whatever you want, shawty, I'll give it to you Your world is my world, And my fight is your fight And my breath is your breath And your heart is mine I'm now gonna one life, my one life My one life for sure Let me tell you one time

I'ma tell you one time And I'ma be your one time Girl, I love you And I'ma be your one time You'll be my number one girl Always making time for you I'ma tell you one time Girl, I love you I'ma tell you one time

Girl, I love you Shawty right there, she's got everything I need And I'ma tell her one time Give you everything you need Down to my last dime She makes me happy I know where I'll be Right by your side

Cause she is the one And girl, you're my one love, my one heart My one life for sure I'ma tell you one time Girl, I love, girl, I love you I'ma tell you one time Girl, I love, girl, I love you And I'ma be the one guy

You'll be my number one girl Always making time for you I'ma tell you one time I'ma tell you one time I'ma tell you one time I'll tell you one time B-A-C-U-Z I'll tell you one time B-A-C-U-Z

I'll tell you one time I'll tell, one time. Justin Bieber, one time, his first ever single. He's got married this week to Hailey Nalbiba. And that is Megan's Friday flashback today. Divisive. Divisive. Divisive, Megan. Yeah, but I think, like, you two are like, I've never heard this before.

That's like, it's divisive because it's an age thing. Yeah, but we never played it when we worked afternoons on the radio at all, ever. And I don't think you've ever really been believers. Not until Vaughn, like, caught up with him and had chats. Now you're a believer. That was like four years ago. Yeah. And you bonded over John Wick movies. Oh, we chats. Now you're a believer. Four years ago. Yeah.

And you bonded over John Wick movies. Oh, we did. It's been like two more since. Yeah. We should catch up, man. The baby should catch up. Yeah. Sorry if you didn't enjoy that.

I did. The producers did, but we're younger than you two. Pretty split on that. Right. Okay. What are people saying? It sounds like Alvin and the Chipmunks. Oh, that's, he was 15. Okay. Now I people saying? It sounds like Alvin and the Chipmunks.

Oh, that's... He was 15. Okay. Now I see why you're ranked 13th in Nelson. Hey. Ouch. I think you just... Someone else said,

I think you guys just slipped to 14th in Nelson. That's rough. That's hurtful. That's my hometown. That's my hometown. Look what you've done. Look what you've done.

14th now. We're buggered. Someone said, this song hasn't got any better in 10 years. What about, why didn't you play Baby Baby? Because it's not old enough. Isn't it? It's nine years old. Next year. Next year we'll be able to hit that song that says Baby like 10,000 times.

Okay. So I was like, you can't follow Fleetwood Mac with prepubescent Bieber. But the thing was, I was trying to go completely the other way. Like I didn't want to like take on Fleetwood Mac with pre-pubescent Bieber but the thing was I was trying to go completely the other way like I didn't want to like take on Fleetwood Mac with something akin to like I wanted to and there's nothing

post-pubescent Bieber that we could play because it's not old enough right this is the first time I've ever text messaged in for a Friday flashback

never been motivated to do so but this is so bad oh I had to thanks hey but thanks for still listening we appreciate it Megan I know to do so. Was that a good? This is so bad. Oh, I had to. Thanks. Hey, but thanks for still listening.

We appreciate it. Megan, I know you love a young man, but this is too much. He is the same age. Well, you know what? Speaking of Toy Boy, there's an awkward

situation yesterday that Megan found herself in. So, okay. I was at the cafe yesterday serving behind the counter and a lovely woman comes in, like big smile on her face, really chatty. Now, she has been in before

because I know there was a bit of rapport between my husband, Andrew, and her. So they had banter. Now, as a woman's age, do I need to mention her age? Well, I'd like you to Not that it matters But I want to build a picture in my head That's what I'm doing too

Hunting a picture I would guess Maybe 60s Okay What's her hair like? She actually had just had her hair done Super flash She had

It wasn't quite a perm But it was like a blow wave She was like It's very old fashioned And I said But it was like a blow wave She was like It's very old fashioned And I said But it looks lovely Okay And what was she wearing?

What did she wear? She was wearing a cardigan I think Okay Classic And like a nice shirt She was dressed nicely Okay Alright I've got a great picture in my head

Was she wearing mum capris? No I don't think she was wearing capris I might need you to lift your surveillance footage just so I can see. Okay. So I can match it. Yeah. So yeah. Very lovely, talkative.

Yeah. And she comes up to the counter and has some cute banter with my husband. This is a toy boy. And he kind of laughed a bit nervously. Yeah. And then gestures to me and says, this is my wife. And I was like, okay, weird. I was like, hi.

And she said, oh, you're married. I was like, what banter has gone on here previously? Previously. That's like saying straight away, you're on speakerphone. Yeah. This is my wife. Hey, mum, yeah. That's my line. Oh, hey, Mum, your Vaughan's in the car. That's what I always get.

I'm like, what was going to be said if Vaughan wasn't in the car? Because you know he has a penchant for Meryl Streep, Diane Keaton. He loves Diane Keaton. You? I needed to say that again because you didn't bite to Vaughan. I actually didn't hear it, but yeah. You? Yeah, thanks.

But he loves the older ladies, doesn't he? Not like, okay. And what, Judi Dench? No, Helen Mirren. Yeah, that's her. Oh, yes. Helen Mirren, yeah. But he's never mentioned Judi.

Right. Maggie Smith, don't Maggie Smith? No, not Maggie either. Might be a bit too old. Tina McGonagall, I believe she played in the Harry Potter movies. He's not a Harry Potter fan. Mr. Porter! So this lady is in his Target demo.

Yeah, I mean, sure. I mean, sure. So there may have been some flirtations going on before. Okay. And I thought that would be the end of it because... You've got to do what you've got to do to sell some muffins. Yeah. Exactly.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? So she's like, oh, you've got a real disappointment in her voice. Oh, you're married. I was like, okay, I'm right here, but that's cool. And yeah, I thought that was the end of it. He walks over to the coffee machine and starts making a coffee. And that's when she says, now, I'm not sure if it was directed at me or him.

Right. He's wearing shorts. Although there's a lot of leg to play with, isn't there? Wow. Wouldn't even know where to begin to process that. Thirsty. Yeah, I was like, wow. There's a lot of leg there to play with, isn't there?

Yeah. See, I think she was, it was directed at you, girl talk, but so he would hear it. No, I don't think she has any time at all for Megan in this. No, I think it was meant for him to hear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She said it. Oh, so you don't think.

I don't think he's going to be allowed to work in it. I don't know if she was even... She just got her hair did and her nails did and she's coming for her man. Feeling herself. So I was like, okay. Awkward laugh. Didn't know what to say. That's probably the end of it.

Yep. He walks over to the blender and starts blending. God, I'm just wondering what she's got for this next leg of the journey. And that's when she says really loudly to try and get over the blender. Yeah. She makes a lot of noise, doesn't she? Oh!

It was like... She is on heat. Someone, we need some cold water around here. Yeah. She was... Sprayer in the face. Yeah. She went and sat down and faced directly the counter.

Of course, right, yeah. She needed four of you. Just imagine the look she had on her face. It just watched. I want that. The same way I look at, like, things on the barbecue when they're not cooking fast enough. Hurry up, you scrumptious little piece of meat.

But that's quite ballsy right in front of you. I know. Especially when he said, this is my wife, as in stop flirting with me. Diffuser, yeah, diffuser. Come back when she's not here and I'll flirt with you over a scone. Yeah, I think you're going to have to keep watch on him. I did say I'll be back every day now to work fine, can't I?

Keep an eye on this situation. Yeah, yeah. Could we take some calls? Have you, has anybody listening ever been with their partner and someone's flirted with their partner right in front of them?

Yes. Oh, everybody, surely. Because. Yes. But then. That's when you like grab their hand and you're like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

You're like squeezing it. Like introduce me as your wife. Let's go. But like how awkward was it? Like maybe someone didn't know that your partner was right next to you. Yeah. And then they did all like your situation, Megan. They knew.

They knew and they did not care. And they tried any way to flirt with your partner. Yeah. 0800-ALZADAM 9696 When has someone flirted with your partner right in front of you?

Megan, well, a cougar came into Megan's cafe and openly flirted with Megan's husband. I don't like the term cougar. I mean, I'm not defending her actions, but you shouldn't call her a cougar. I'll call her a thirsty woman

in her 60s. Yeah, okay. Oh, that's okay, is it? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, and she quite openly flirted after she found out that he was my husband. So we want to know

when someone's flirted with your partner, could be partner, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, whatever, right in front of you, right in the audacity. The sheer audacity. The sheer audacity of it. But a lot of messages coming through. So many.

Someone said, my fiance is Scottish. So all women within a 12-meter radius begin ovulating any time he starts talking. And they're just like drawn to the accent. Gerard Butler, Scottish accent. Oh, okay. Does this one look like he was at a 300? I don't know.

No reports on what he looks like. Just reports on the voice alone. Just the accent. He introduces himself and the person's just like, mmm. Yes, you are. My name's Craig. I just think porridge, but that's because of TV advertising.

Porridge. It's made me think of porridge. Everybody's got a word when you have to think about how you say an accent. Yeah. Or malari. No. What? You start with porridge.

Or malari. Porridge. Or lase. Or lase. Yeah. Okay. Porridge. Porridge will get you into it for the Scottish accent.

Yeah. Better porridge. Raquel, when did somebody flirt with your partner right in front of you? Hi, guys. My partner and I were at a mutual friend's wedding, and actually one of his old friends from rowing dates was there, a female. And she'd met me before, and she had come up to me and she said, oh, you're Donna's girlfriend.

And I was like, yeah, that's me, hi. Which I thought was kind of weird because I'd never met her before. But then come the end of the ceremony at the wedding, the photographer was going around and taking photos of the couples. And I got a photo with my boyfriend, and then she promptly came up and stole him and took photos with him very couple-y right in front of me. It was the most ridiculous thing in the world for me.

Oh, no. Was Jono in trouble after that? Yeah, I definitely had a quiet word with her. Oh, poor Jono didn't know what was happening. No, he could have bloody stopped it. He's way too friendly. So nice, he didn't even say no. Oh, Jono got told off at the meeting.

Can you wait till we get in the car ride home, Jono? We've all been told off at a meeting. Have we? Oh, yeah. Not always by your partner, just in general. Your behaviour is unbecoming. Raquel, thank you. Claire, when did someone flirt with your partner right in front of you?

Hey, guys. When I was doing a course, a friend of mine threw the course, I invited her around for dinner. Yeah. And she started flirting with my man right in front of me at dinner. She said to him, because she was studying to be in this as well, she said to him that she'd love to stick a needle in his veins because he had good veins.

That's terrible flirting. Terrible flirting. God, I'd love to draw some blood from you. Jesus, alright, St. John, calm down. Claire, thanks for your call. That would go down at the New Zealand Blood Service annual conference

but it's not going to go down just at dinner, is it? No, no. Some text messages in. Whenever we go out, I find my husband is just a magnet to all 18-year-olds. They all come up and start, like, flirting with him. And sometimes I'm confident enough to just sit back and be like, yeah, give it your best shot, girlfriend. Oh, good.

I like that. Yeah, that's a bit of confidence to sit back. And then you let him pretend. And then you strut in and you're like, hello. And then he's like, oh, my gosh, take him with you. And then you win. And they're all like, teach us your secrets. To the older woman, teach us your secrets.

Right, okay. Tell us how you do it. I know a girl only because we're from the same town. But that's the only reason I know her. We're not friends with her or anything. a girl only because we're from the same town, but that's the only reason I know her. We're not friends with her or anything. Just know her because we're from the same town. She told me at a party of her mutual friends that she would like to touch my boyfriend.

I didn't know what to say, so I just said, please don't. Please don't. He's mine. No. At a wedding, all the older ladies were all over my husband, telling him how charming he was and saying all these nice things. And he, of course, was lapping it up. But it went far worse when he was sitting down

and an old lady came and sat on his knee. That's where I was like, I think we've found our barrier. I bet he got in trouble too. Unfairly, he probably got told off too. You can't shove an old woman off your knee. No. Because if she hits the deck, like... Sometimes they don't get up.

Yeah, they bruise easy, don't they? Yeah. Someone said, Megan, I've been into your cafe. Well, you're not there. He does have a lot of leg. It's a free-for-all. Okay. Let's wrap this up.

It's like at the zoo when they... Let's wrap this up. It's at the zoo Let's wrap this up It's like when they feed the lions They open that little flap on the gate And put a big rump rump steak through I think I'm done with the show for today I more imagine Two boys like that cow

That's getting lowered into the T-Rex part On Jurassic Park And it's like Or is that a goat? And it's like Meh Meh And then you just hear

Through the bush and he's like meh meh poor toy boy hasn't it been a wonderful podcast so far and it's all thanks to Spark our primary sponsor

do you love free data? then you will love the Spark data stack more data every month that you stay. Hey guys, let's get back into that podcast. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Gosh, today's fact of the day is about men and women and lying. Okay. And who does it more often? Women.

What do you reckon? Who lies more? What kind of lie are we talking about? White lies or big lies? Women can be a little bit more emotionally driven with their actions. So if you're trying to save someone's feelings, like with little white lies, maybe women lie more. Is that your excuse for hiding your... Tell me last, sweet little lie.

Is that your excuse for also hiding your online shopping? Yeah, I don't want to raise his blood pressure. I'm thinking about him. Yeah, right. Do you know the capacity to tell a lie is one of the few talents that every human being possesses? Oh, so people are like, my one downfall is I can't lie.

It's like, you're lying right now. You are lying. Like, not all humans can cry or not all humans can, you know, there's a bunch of stuff that happens as humans, but lying is sort of a universal talent that every human possesses. Right. So, throughout study, it has been found that men and women actually lie at equal frequencies,

which means that we lie the same. There you go. Men, however, are more likely to lie in order to please themselves, while women are more likely to please others with their lying. That's what I said. Yeah, that's basically what you said, yeah. Thank you. So, yeah's basically what you said, yeah. Yeah. Thank you. So, yeah, men primarily to please themselves.

Yep. Women to please others. Other things I learned about lying when I was reading about lying last night and the human ability. When you get Parkinson's disease, apparently one of the early signs is that you have trouble lying. Oh, okay. Oh, really?

Yeah, because they believe that is linked to the part of the early signs is that you have trouble lying. Oh, okay. Oh, really? Yeah. Because they believe that is linked to the part of the brain that Parkinson's first affects is also the part of the brain that enables you to create like a fantasy. Right. Because that's what a lie is. Yeah. If you're telling a lie, you've got to imagine the lie. And you can't.

No. And part of the brain affected by Parkinson's in the early stages is the part that also gives you the ability to lie. Okay. Yeah, so today's fact of the day is men and women lie the same amount, but men are more likely to lie to please themselves and women are more likely to lie to please others.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.