ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - October 30 2019

Episode Date: October 29, 2019

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ZM. Head music. Lives here. Fletch Warner Megan. The podcast. Thank you, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch Warner Megan. Wednesday morning. Anya, can you just tell me, what was the name of that missing teenager? Sophie McEwan Quinn. Because somebody sent me a community notice about this missing teenager saying they're looking for this missing teenager. The missing teenager herself is commenting on it. What? Are you sure?

Yeah. Somebody said it's a very unusual situation. Look, this was the missing post and somebody said little girl needs to go home. And they were like, who do you think you are saying that about me? Unless it's someone with the same name. Looks the same person. Very confusing situation. I don't trust anything on Facebook.

No, no, no, I don't either. Mark Zuckerberg. Mark Zuckerberg. Do you think he's responsible for it? He's responsible for everything. Cambridge Analytics. Bad haircut. Did you see AOC responsible for it? He's responsible for everything. Cambridge Analytics. Bad haircut. Did you see AOC

having a go at him? Yeah. She had him on though. I like her. Yeah. I only know her as her acronym. Who's AOC?

Oh no, I know who you mean. I did see that. God, I love... I think it should be a great president just because I think more presidents should be acronyms.

Yeah, AOC. A senator? What is her position? She's a Democrat. A Democrat, yeah. Democratic, yeah. That was good stuff. She's always grilling like old white men.

It's so great to watch. And so eloquently and calmly. Yeah, I know. She's brilliant. Yeah, it is. And that only makes them angrier. Yeah. Coming up on the show,

the top six born Alan Smith. Coming up on the show, the top six. Born Alan Smith. What's on the agenda today? There's going to be Uber drone deliveries. This is for food, for Uber Eats. They're trialling the technology. I saw this drone. It's got mega propellers.

Yeah, you wouldn't want to hit any power lines. Or your telephone lines. That's so douse. Not like your little drone you fly around. Nah. It's like six or seven propellers. Well, the top six Uber Eats drone delivery issues that I can see rising. Okay.

Another $1,000 to win today with our bonus banger. We'll tell you the song you've got to be listening out for soon. And coming up, we want to talk about Vaughn being an a-hole. Oh, he's such a nice guy, that Vaughn you work with. Oh, prick. Absolute prick. He's a nice guy. Feet behind the curtain. All right, you lot, listen up.

It's story time. All right, I've found three news stories. I've got three news headlines. Vaughan and Megan, you're only allowed to pick one. Headline one, police remind kidnappers dad is a UFC fighter. Headline two, do nudists wear helmets? And headline three, divorced woman gets last laugh. Well, first one's pretty self-explanatory.

It is. Yep, it is. Dad's an MMA fighter. Yeah, I'm intrigued by two and three. What was it? Divorce. What was the three? Divorce woman gets last laugh.

That does tickle my fancy. Because you've been a divorce woman? Yeah. Did you get the last laugh? Just been listening to a podcast about divorce. Have you? Have you? Why?

Why? Why? I'm just tearing myself up for when it happens to me. Just getting prepared. No, no, it's a really good podcast called Over My Dead Body. Oh, yeah. One of those crime podcasts. Oh, it's a true crime potty. Yeah, so the way this guy who does the podcast got into it

is he was looking into another guy. Yeah. Because in orth Orthodox Jewish relationships, guys have to permit their wives to divorce them. Oh, okay. Is that so? They have to sign a thing called a get. And there's this rogue rabbi who, when the husband doesn't give the gets, he kidnaps them and cattle prods them in the gooch and stuff until they sign the piece of paper. And they call him

the prod father. Because he prods their sensitive bits. Wow. Amazing. I like the prod father. The prod father and that's a very intimidating name because instantly I can imagine that hurting a lot. And he's got one of those awesome New York

Jewish accents. And he talks about how if it can make a five-ton bull move, you'd be surprised what a prod can do to a man's sensitive parts. Why don't they just change it so that you don't have to get a get and then you don't get prodded? Because it's like a super old religious, good luck changing any religion. Yeah, right.

You know how stuck in their ways they are. It's like a thread to give them a fourie. What, reattach it? Sew one back on. You get a fourie donator. You had your bris Now we put it back on It's an unbris

And then on your licence It's like Would you like to be A 4e donor Yes I would The prodfather sounds Very intimidating Yeah

He was This story is in no way As good as what we're Talking about right now But it's still up there Okay Yeah You want to go Or the nerdist on the bike What do you want Nerdists wear helmets in no way as good as what we're talking about right now, but it's still up there. Okay. Yeah.

Or the nerdists on the bike. What do you want? The nerds wear helmets. Oh, that's true. Do they do wear helmets? Safety first. Good Lord. Yeah, but what about your penis if you fall off your bike? Also, I don't think my parents have ever written a Biden naked.

Yeah, I wouldn't think it would be something you do, right? Do they do activities at their nudist camp in Nelson? There's a pool. They swim. Right, what about volleyball? Nah. See, the one I grew up at was tennis. There was trampolines.

You could imagine tennis if you had a big flopper. Imagine trampolines. Yeah. Old ladies having a bouncing and smashing the face with their titties. Ah! I can't stop. Gathered some perpetual motion. They weren't clothed when they were on the trampolines.

Right, okay. Do you want to do nudist wear helmets or divorce woman gets last laugh? I'll have either. What do you want? Divorce woman gets last laugh. Okay. Okay, we go to the UK now where a mum has had to pay out in her divorce with her cheating husband in divorce fees. She had to pay out?

Well, in the divorce fees. I'm assuming they went half. So, £5,800 is what she had to pay him. So, double that. See, how much did divorce cost? How much was yours? No, just however much however much the lawyer's fees are. Yeah, and then you do like a court fee

for a hundred and something bucks. But then how much is a lawyer? Well, it wasn't, we just got advice. Oh, right. But if you're splitting assets and everything through a lawyer it can add up. Yeah, right. Ticks up. Well, she had to pay her share of £5,800. So

she decided to grab a couple of large blue buckets and pay him back in coins. Small coins. Peas. Always wanted to do this. Well, you've seen people pay parking. She must have got that idea. People pay parking tickets at the local council. Dump a whole lot

of coins on the desk and say, good luck. Wait, so £5,000? Yeah, so all up, she sent him 159 kgs of small coins. Wow. The effort it would have taken. She explained on Facebook, so a man that I was married to, bless his heart, decided to do me the biggest favour of my life and slept with his own friend's wife. The woman who was attending my wedding and watched me hold hands and look into the eyes

of the man I loved and promised to love him forever, all while knowing damn well they were sleeping together. Well, I busted him and that led us to divorce. And for some god awful reason, I was ordered to pay him £5,800. So, boxes and boxes of dimes. She sounds like she's got a good outlook, though. Yeah, she's probably moving on as best you can, I guess. Yeah. Fletch Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM.

This morning, Vaughan, I don't know if you were expecting us to get on board and be like, yeah, man, this is exactly what I would have done. But Vaughan told us a story which I think is exposing him as the a-hole he is. Not true. Not true. Everyone says to me, oh, he's such a nice guy. I'm like, mm-hmm. Yeah.

He is. He just sends me a message to see how my day is. And I was like, was there more questions after that? Because Vaughan's notorious for sliding into people's DMs and Facebook messenger for Goss for the tea

I care about people no you don't you care about the tea the Goss but I'm never going to sign myself up to something that I would regret

okay so you get a message yesterday tell people what you did and then they can judge I got a message saying can I ask a huge favour dot dot dot, dot. That's what the message says.

From someone you've known for years. But haven't really seen for ages. And just recently had some banter. Light banter. But you know them. But you know them. Were you fishing for tea for a while? But not like close friend.

Right. But person I know. Right, yeah. Can I ask a huge favour Dot dot dot This came in at Ten to one yesterday I was napping Okay right

So I replied An hour later Just over an hour later I said Well you can only ask That's not what you say Can I ask a Huge favour

You can only ask That's what you say because you don't say yes because then you've signed on to the favour. No, you haven't signed on. You have. You've signed up. People say yes to be nice and then it's not legally binding. If they're asking too much

you can say, look, I'm not comfortable with that. You are a far nicer person to say you can only ask and then they... That's putting up an aggressive shield straight away. 100%. But if you are, yeah, sure. a far nicer person to say, you can only ask. No, because that's putting up an aggressive shield straight away. 100%. But if you are,

yeah, sure. And then they ask you and you don't want to do it, you're a worse person for bowing out at that stage. You've given them false hope. No, you're not. What did they say

when you replied with that? Don't worry, I've changed my mind. See, you're a prick. And I sent a thumbs up. I'm not a prick. I just, you are. I didn't are I wouldn't have wanted to do it No, because you put up a

That's pretty much putting up your hand and saying No Me? Pretty much You pretty much put up your hand I always say I never promise If someone asks a favour

I never promise that I'm going to be any part of it Until I know what it is What is? I always say you can only ask I got it off my mum My mum would be like Well, you can ask What if I had asked If I had said of it until I know what it is. What is? I always say, you can only ask. I got it off my mum. My mum would be like, well, you can ask. What if I had asked? If I had said, hey, can I ask a huge favour?

What would you have said to me? What is it? That's what I would have said. What is it? You're close enough that I'll be like, what is it? What is it? I need you to help me bury a body. I'll be like, nah, you can borrow my spade, but I'm not touching it.

You also know that does make you culpable in some way, giving me a spade. No, but you say it's for your garden. Yeah, throw the spade away. I don't want the spade but I'm not touching it. You also know that does make you culpable in some way giving me a spade. No but you say it's for your garden. Yeah throw the spade away I don't want the spade back. I'll give you my bad spade and when you're digging for the hole for the body the handle breaks and you're like that smith has stitched me up again. I'll be like no it's no bagsies I don't want the spade back. It's broken. It's got your DNA all over it mate. But usually

when someone's like okay so I have a huge favour to ask that's like setting the bar really high so that when you come in, it's not as bad as that. It's like never as bad. Don't do that then. Don't overshoot it. Be like, hi, man.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Would you be able to? Like don't lead in with can I ask a huge favour. Producers, how do we feel about this? Prec or not? Well, you know what we're going to say. Prec, prec, prec, about this? Prick or not? Well, you know what we're going to say. Prick, prick, prick, prick. Absolute prick.

James? Oh, I'm on the fence here. Oh, I knew James was on the fence. Only because Vaughan helped me out over the weekend, so he's in my good books at the moment. Yeah, where were you assholes when we were moving James into his new house? Oh, working. How selfish.

Did you move stuff? I was on an island. I couldn't get there. Did you move stuff into my room? I've got a room at James' house, did I tell you? No. James! She doesn't.

This would sound weird on the radio if there's no, like, nothing behind it. No, I've got the spare room. It's my room. Because James and I are best friends. Has James actually agreed to this? No, but it's a thing. James! Stop trying to be funny. What are you doing? No, but it's a thing. James!

Stop trying to be... What are you doing? He's my best friend, guys. See, this is the thing. If someone asks you a favour, you say yes, then you're stuck with this. Imagine that in your spare room. Shut up.

Don't call her that. Don't do that. I am a great guest. I've helped her move more than once. I'm allowed to call her whatever I want. Hey, you have helped, but you're not allowed to call her whatever I want. Hey, you have helped, but you're not allowed to call me whatever you want. Who else in this room's donated to your little charity collection?

Oh, yes, thank you, actually. The Smith family. Lovely Anya. Oh, yes, Anya did as well. Lovely Anya. What charity collection? Oh, by the way, it wasn't us to help. What charity collection?

Megan. Have you spoken to me in real life about it? She is so self-centered, isn't she? If it's something to do with both and encouraging, I don't want to hear about it. I don't have time for social media. So is this something you've spoken to me in person about? Is it a colourful donut that'll look good on Instagram?

Because if it's not me, I ain't got no time for it. I'm sorry that it works, Stephen Jay. Please not start the show like this, guys. I feel like there's a lot of animosity. Don't sign yourself up for a favour you don't want. I don't want to end up being the prick in this. You are the prick. It started him being a prick.

You are. What a prick. I like how you turned that around and everyone else is the prick. No. You're pretty quiet over there. Except me. Wow. I mean, you're a prick without even launching an investigation.

Oh, yeah, we all know that. I mean, we could all agree Fletch is the biggest prick, can't we? Yeah. Oh! All agree, all in favour of Fletch being the biggest prick. But I mean, I'm the cutest. He's the cutest prick. A big cute prick.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Sorry. Why did you say that? You're going to have to say it now. Why did you say that right before we went on the radio? Vaughan just read us a tweet from Lewis Capaldi. Lewis Capaldi. Lewis Capaldi said, it's weird everyone loves bums so much

because that's where the poos live. That's so funny. I don't know why. That Scottish accent. Yeah. It just makes it so much funnier. It does, yeah. It's so funny I don't know why They're just All of a sudden You can imagine That Scottish accent Yeah It just makes it So much funnier

It does Oh goodness me Pull it together Okay Right before Christmas A list of naughty And nice names Has been released

For boys and girls 55 days away By the way Christmas 55 We must be due For a penetration update Is it November

Friday It'll be November to Friday? It'll be November on Friday. Yes. Wow. Did I blink? Did I miss October? Where did that go? Do you want naughty or nice names first?

Nice. Nice name. Oh, cute. You guys said the same thing. Yeah, we know. Okay. I don't know. Why are we in sync, aren't we?

Because we work so much together, we've just synced up, haven't we? Yeah, yeah, we have. Okay, nicest girls' names. Number five is Emily. Number four is Olivia. Number three, Grace. Number two, Ava. And number one is Isla.

Those are the nicest. Isla? I haven't really heard that. Is that a popular name? My friend's got a daughter called Isla. Oh, yeah, okay. Isla Fisher, that's the one. Right.

Nicest boys names. Leo is number five. That's my little doggy. Number four is Muhammad. Number three is Oscar. Number two is Noah. Oh, stop. Everybody knows

that shitty girl. Number two is Noah and number one is Arthur. So Arthur is the nicest boys name. Okay. We're going to get school teachers texting him back. I love that Arthur's made a comeback.

Because this is how they got this list, isn't it? They talk to school teachers and ask them for their shithead kids. The names of all the bad kids and good kids. But then those were just like really popular names. All of those names. Will any of those names also feature on the naughty list? No. There's no double ups, I don't believe.

So the naughtiest girls' names, and funnily enough, there's a trend for all five. They all end with an ah, like a sound at the end. So number five is Sophia. Number four, Amelia. Number three, Isabella. Number two, Ella. And number one, the naughtiest girl's name is Mia.

Okay. I know a Mia. She's all right, though. Okay. Number five for the naughtiest boys, George. Prince George. He's a bit of a like, you know. Is he a rat bag?

You always see him being a bit cheeky to this. Well, didn't they have to tell him off at the wedding? It was funny. That's right. Number four, Oliver. Number three is Charlie. And number two, the naughtiest boy's name's Harry. A lot of boys being named after Prince Harry, maybe?

Maybe. And number one is Jack. Jack seems like a little... Right. Is this a British list? Cheeky. Got to be a British list. It sounds British.

It sounds very British. UK, yeah. Yeah, okay. From the ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hello there. Today's top six. Uber has trialled their Uber Eats delivery drone. Okay. Now this basically says it all really.

It's just going to be Uber Eats but delivered by drone, not by a person driving. Because when I first saw this headline, I was like, oh yeah, how's that going to get in the air? Like, because I was thinking of a little DGI drone or something. Nah. But this thing has like eight propellers. And does it have like a little compartment they put it in? Yes. This is a photo of it, Megan.

It's got six propellers. It's got three on each arm. So what happens is it uses it to take off, and then like that jump jet that we talked about a few weeks ago on the show, it turns and propels it forward. Whoa. Wow. Very futuristic.

And then so what is it land in front of your house, and then you're meant to open up the little compartment, shut it, and then it flies away. Yeah. What about windy days and power lines? Wow, man, these are all problems. These are all problems. As any drone flyer will tell you.

And but then also, like, what about no fly zones, like in the cities? Because you've got a drone. Where can you go? West Auckland beaches. And that's it? Yeah. Up the West Auckland beach would be about the only... It's not going to be able to fly to my house because it's right by the...

Funilpai. Funilpai. No, it won't be able to. I want to have a whinge about that too. You moved next to an airport, mate. The top six. Yeah, I didn't move the next year. The top six problems with drone delivery of food.

Number six. Having to walk to a landing zone to get your food rather than having it literally put in your hands without having to step outside your house. Yeah. Can I get clearance to land at the airbase? And then you have to go all the way to the airbase. You might as well just go to... Yeah, that's true. Yeah, kind of defeating the

purpose, isn't it? And then I don't want them to see me at the airbase in my jammies. Wouldn't be the first job. But I don't get it. Neither. Just felt like one of those things you sit and then let everybody else fill in the gaps. Right.

Like you had a sleepover at the military base. But we all know you're a Devonport Navy girl. Shut up. Or a... She has. That's actually a fact. Megan has been to the Devonport Naval Base. She had a sleepover.

And it wasn't a media open day. I'll tell you that much. No, it wasn't. Tell you what, there was a bloody mess in the captain's mess, though. Stop. Number five on the list of the top six problems with drone delivery of food. Cold food. It's literally been under fan.

Under a fan for the entire flight. Do you think they'd put it in one of those bags in the... Actually, it's the Uber Eats drone. It's pretty much like a flying chilli bin. It'll stay at whatever temperature the thing is inside. It's fully...

Ice cream or hot, it'll just keep it... It should. Do you reckon it'd be drippy and yuck inside? Have you ever seen how condensated those pizza bags can be? Oh, I thought you were saying it'd be like a wheelie bin.

You know, your wheelie bin gets a bit more care. But no. You'd give it a wipe. With the cheese on the side? I'd probably give it a wipe. No, like an oven. Number four

on the list of the top six problems with drone delivery of food are your battery dying mid-flight and your food just disappearing off the map

into the bush. But imagine like it crashes into your backyard Yeah, because that way when you're flying your drone it's like battery low, two minutes of flight, return to home and you're like, no you're like, cancel. Don't you tell me what to do

flying around and it's like battery low. Do, do, do. It starts to ditch. You're like, oh God. Pull up, pull up. And you've got to like fly it. And I did this and it flew and it just landed on the sand and not the water. And I was like, I felt like a hero.

I felt like Tom Hanks in that movie. Sully. Sully. I avoided disaster. Yeah. Crashing into the ocean. Number three on the list of the top six problems I see with drone delivery of food. Your food hits a little bit of turbulence and it just arrives scrambled.

Everything's all over the place. The lids come off your burger. There's a pickle stuck to the inside roof of the... Burger chow mein. Yeah. Just all tossed up in there. Number two on the list of the top six problems I see with drone delivery of food. Mid-air attack from seagulls wanting to get into that and eat some chips en route.

Bird strike. Yeah. Especially those big brown seagulls. The mollyhawks. The speckly ones. Yeah. Yeah, the big daddies. And one will be like, I'm going to take the risk.

They're like, no, if you have bloody an ear, it'll cut you. And he's like, I'll do it for you guys. So you're saying they sacrificed one seagull or mollyhawk to get all the chips inside. It's a good plan. He might survive. You'd be that seagull. But he's going to have a minced wing. No.

And number one on the list of the top six problems with drone delivery of food. My fried chicken would get shot down by a scrambled F-16 fighter jet who thinks it's a terrorist up to no good. Yeah. You're like, here it comes, watching it. And then you just hear... Also, don't they have technology? Because people have flown over the Harbour Bridge or near military bases

and they're able to capture them electronically, aren't they, and land them? Yeah, what is it they... So you just have people hacking drones for free food. For free food, yeah. I can see this happening. But what if you hacked it and someone had ordered the dud takeaways?

Oh, yeah. Like, what if you're like, I've got a feeling that that's a big box of fried chicken and you landed it and it was Wendy's? I mean, it's free, so I'd probably still eat Wendy's. Would you be able to use your flight scanner on your phone to, like, check the drone and see? Be like, oh, that's Uber Eats. Oh, with the flight apps.

I don't know if it's using registered airspace, because that's the deal. Like, they have to register their flight and that's Uber Eats. Oh, with the flight apps. I don't know if it's using registered airspace because that's the deal. They have to register their flight and that's how it gets in there. Maybe. Somebody just said, yeah, you could skate shoot with prizes. Yeah, but then you've got to be picking out

bloody shotgun pellets out of your chips. Yeah. And bits of broken drone because I'm imagining those things don't even go down quietly or in one piece. That is today's top secret. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

In New South Wales, they have launched a digital version of their licence. So this is on an app. It's called Service New South Wales, and I can see that on the app, you can get like free rego checks. It tells you you can renew your registration, all your licences you can put on there.

Demerit points, fines. Like logging on to airpoints to see how many airpoints you got last month. Oh god, I've got a couple more demerit points. Get a free toaster at this rate. So now you can actually, they've just launched the app has been out for a while but they've just

added the license part to it. So you can click on it. That's so cool. Yeah. And it will have a unique QR code. Okay. Which is linked to you. It will also show when the license was last refreshed.

So you can reload it to prove legitimacy. Right. And yeah, so basically you could go to a club And they can scan it And know all your details So all your details Will be linked onto it But it still has a photo It still looks visually Like your driver's licence

Huh okay Now also they've said There's obviously some issues Like if you're getting Pulled over by the police Don't reach for your phone Until they ask you to Oh yeah because you're not Meant to be on your phone Yeah so if you get pulled over And't reach for your phone until they ask you to. Oh, yeah, because you're not meant to be on your phone.

Yeah, so if you get pulled over and you're holding your phone. Yeah. Yeah. But also, like, how easy would it be if your older brother had this app for you to log on as your older brother and use his ID to get into bars? Yeah. Just spitballing some ideas here. So if you downloaded the app and just used his login.

The QR code would bring up a fairly decent photo though, right? Just spitballing some ideas here. So if you downloaded the app and just used his login. QR code would bring up a fairly decent photo though, right? Yeah, but I mean, you'd look like your brother. If you look like your brother. Well, it still had the photo that was like the same. So visually it looks like your license. Right, but they'll be able to zoom in. Because you know, on a license, the photo's quite small. But if they were digital, it could be a higher quality.

So they'd be able to zoom in and be like, you're nice, Troy. Nice, Troy. You don't have to be twins or nearly identical brothers to get away with it. And then in that case, you'd be of age anyway. Yeah. Unless you were born like 20 minutes apart and on different days. Yeah.

And then just wait a day to go to a bar. Yeah. But that'd be a great thing for New Zealand to do. Yeah. Like, what's the thing that we all have to sign up Real Me?

Yeah, Real Me's a government 1A. Yeah, so just get an app, come on. And get licences on there. What are you doing?

Just like, I was just saying, like boomers, they love to blame the Prime Minister for everything. Global warming. No,

they deny global warming. Oh, the All Blacks. They definitely blame her for the. Global warming. No, they deny global warming. Oh, the All Blacks. They definitely blame her for the All Blacks. Yeah, well, I mean, scientifically, they're not wrong. She was on the field.

Yeah, and she was Prime Minister and we all know how important that is to the All Blacks. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. One in three Kiwis

are doing this. Vaughan is definitely not one of them. Fletch, I don't think so, although you're not opposed to it. One in three Kiwis are doing this. Warner's definitely not one of them. Fletch, I don't think so, although you're not opposed to it. One in three Kiwis are reducing their meat consumption or eating no meat at all. No, that is me. I'm definitely reducing my meat consumption. It's because it's so expensive.

Yeah, we're being forced to. No, but I think it's definitely health-wise. It's good for you. Yeah. And the planet, obviously. I'm not a huge red meat eater anyway, pretty much. Yeah, I'm just fishing chocon. Vaughan's rolling his eyes after his weekend of double BQing.

Mm-mm. So the most vegans, the age group that makes up vegans and vegetarians mostly is millennials. Okay. But this is surprising. Baby boomers were leading the meat reduction charge. But that's because they've all got bloody colon cancer. Cholesterol. Because of their meat and three veg and taties all their life.

I thought they got disproven last week. Oh, did it? I thought red meat had joined the ranks of coffee and red wine. Like, it was a good for you, bad for you. No, because this week chocolate's bad for you. So, I mean, it just depends on the week. Oh, did it? I thought red meat had joined the ranks of coffee and red wine. Like, it was a good for you, bad for you. No, because this week chocolate's bad for you. So, I mean, it just depends on the week. It's just, it's the moon cycle, is it? Yeah.

All depends on the stage of the moon. So, meat reducers, flexitarians, primarily vegetarians, who only occasionally eat meat or fish, make up more than one third of New Zealand now. That is quite high. I didn't think it would be that high. That's really amazing. Yeah.

Meat reduces. Chicken or fish, that's a cop out though. They're still meat. Yeah, but it's... And arguably the way that those are obtained, farming wises worse than, you know, like the plundering of the oceans. Do you think about the sustainability of your turkey

when you're cooking it up? Do you? Do you think about where that schnapper came from? No. Is there much orange roughy left in the sea after you've had your fill? Well, what about all your bacon? Where's that coming from? From freedom pigs.

Freedom pigs. No, I only eat my good, like the good meats. Yeah, right. I don't skimp on that, apart from for the dogs. They always do free range eggs and stuff. Yeah. The free range chicken's way more expensive. But it's so much better.

Yeah, but it's also better for you too. I know it is. Like you only have to look at the yolks of the ones that aren't and they're like real sad looking. But yeah, flexitarians grew 18% in the last year. Flexitarians, that's a... That's where you eat meat, but you... Occasionally.

Yeah, you don't make it at every meal. Like a meat and three veg sitch. Producer Caitlin, you've been off a lot of meat. Every now and again, you might have a little hamburger or something, eh? No, not anymore. When she's drunk, she does. No, when I was vegetarian, when I started here, and I remember I was really scared about telling Vaughn.

That's right. And then in Cambodia, I made you eat that really yummy sweet and sour pork and chicken. No, it wasn't pork. And then I was eating chicken and fish, and then a couple of times I got drunk and ate a burger because Vaughn made me. I did not make you. He put it in my face. I did not.

You paid for your own double cheeseburger that night. No, but now I'm like fully vegetarian, trying my best to be vegan in some places. You were telling me about the new vegan ice cream. Yeah. It's tip top, the trumpet. They're doing a vegan trumpet. And it's gluten free too.

Wait, before they do that, have they brought back the mint chocolate chip one? Mint chocolate chip trumpet. I don't think it's even left. I thought it had gone away. Okay, you carry on with your vegan. I don't know why I could have looked at Arnie. But was it very important?

Like, what Arnie would know? If they made a vegan one before they bought back the mint, I'd hit the roof. But if the mint's still around, is the mint trumpet still just been chilling, like, in the background, waiting for me to eat it in summer. Always buy a four-pack. And the kids are like, what are you talking about? It says here, tip-top, trumpet ice cream.

Great. Yeah, look, classic mint. Fantastic. It never went anywhere. Is it still available, though? Of course it is. Because sometimes things are on their website, but you can't find them. Well, no, because I did say that, didn't I, the other day?

When was the last time you actually looked? I feel like you're chucking this. Meg and I don't try to avoid the ice cream. I want to go to the supermarket and there's a trap. You can't just avoid the ice cream. No, but last time I was getting an ice cream from the dairy, I didn't see it in the chest freezer. Well, that's on the dairy.

It's probably because they were eating them all. They were eating them all. Or they were choosing the boys' free selection. More of them. Oh, no, that is 2014. But, yeah, they have announced the vegan ice cream. Stockists and suppliers do listen to the show if they can. Sure.

Let us know. Yeah, this will be in supermarkets, series and petrol stations from November 4. The tip-top vegan trumpet, only available in Boysenberry at this stage, but they're looking to launch other flavours if it proves popular. Right. Fake meat flavoured vegan.

Sure. Teriyaki chicken trumpet. This is, look, I've clicked on buy a trumpet, a mint chocolate trumpet. Yeah,

they haven't gone anywhere, mate. I don't. But that was dated 2014. I'm going to try to add to trolley. I've got a bloody log on. I don't have a log on to do. All right. Next on the show, we're 55 days away from Christmas.

They aren't. Someone said they can't find them either. Someone just said they can't find the mint trumpets either. Yeah, but have they appointed the ice cream aisle like you? They said they aren't around. They said they've looked. Mint chocolate trumpets. No, I think you're talking rubbish.

This sounds like an ad for them now. It's not. Well, it should be. Fave. Hasn't it been a wonderful podcast so far? And it's all thanks to Spark, our primary sponsor. Do you love free data? Then you will love the Spark data stack.

More data every month that you stay. Hey, guys. Let's get back into that podcast. Vaughn would like to ask you an apology. Oh, no. Absolutely no absolutely no reason for an apology. Stop being a prick, mate. No, it's not. It's not an apology. It's great news

that the Mint Trumpet is available. We've had multiple reports of people getting them from dairies at the weekend. And I told you it's on their website. You should have listened. Vaughan, if he sees that something's not... Have you had a peanut butter trumpet? No.

A peanut butter trumpet. Peanut butter, boysenberry, mint and caramel are all in the supermarket. I was just in there. Peanut butter? Thank you for that report. I like that someone was going to the supermarket. They're like, must have a look in the freezer. At seven o'clock in the morning at ice creams.

Lingering. Preparing for later. Lingering by the ice cream. Summer's coming. Eighteen pastering. They're preparing for later. Lingering by the ice cream. The summer's coming. Eighteen past seven. Ho, ho, ho. Ooh, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Fifty-five days, sixteen hours and forty-one minutes until Christmas.

It'll be November on Friday. I'm putting my Christmas tree up on Friday. It's happening. I confirmed. I'm putting my Christmas tree up on Friday. It's happening. I confirmed it last night with my husband. Was he just like, but he loves it till A. He wouldn't let me put it up in October this year. He was like, you have to at least wait till the 1st. I don't know why.

He's very excited about Santa coming. He's been a very good boy this year. Is Mr. Toy Boy being good? Or is he on the naughty list? He's been good. I always say he's been good so that's like saying I'm going to give you lots of presents so he has to get me lots of presents. See what I've done there?

Bleh. You don't give presents to receive presents. Yes, you do. To your husband, you do. Right. Well, Elizabeth is a podcast listener in the United Kingdom. Mm-hmm. Even though we're not talking to them at the moment, are we?

No, we're not. Why are we the moment. We don't like them. They've rolled us. It's officially Christmas, says Elizabeth. Here's a Christmas Coke in the UK and she sent a picture of, it says the original taste and then it's like a really old looking label on a plastic bottle and it's Santa.

Oh, so it's just like a festive label. I thought you were going to say it's like Coke and Cranberry or something. Somebody reported, and I don't know if I've got this in my reports today, but of a Christmas flavoured ginger beer. Oh, yum. Have you had a Christmas flavoured ginger beer? That sounds delightful.

Yeah. Was it like spices? Must have been good. Yeah. Like a black forest almost. That's his Christmas drink to me. been good. Yeah. Spices. Like a black forest almost. That's his Christmas drink to me. Or like a Christmas cake ginger beer. Like a cinnamon. Yeah, like a Christmas cake. It had notes of cinnamon.

Notes of cinnamon. Notes. Another message from the UK. Catherine says, Full noise Christmas penetration at the National History Museum in London. On the 20th of October, that report came in. So she said even 10 days ago, it was really,

you could go skating outside. Huh? Ice skating? On the ice, yes. Oh, cool. Chris Barr from Germany, Munich in Germany. This is the big Christmas countdown, but it's in German.

It says Du grust auf ein Grust countdown! That's so offensive. We nudge, grace, grust, grust! They do sound so angry. No, don't be One Euro McChicken! One Euro McChicken. Yeah, one Euro McChicken. It's the big Christmas countdown. They said they're not

sure what a one Euro McChicken has to do with Christmas but... Special. More of a McTurkey would be a good Christmas burger with some cranberry sauce. Oh my god. Imagine that McChicken crumb on a turkey patty. That'd be good.

That'd be yum. Somebody has also reported Christmas penetration, although they call it saturation. Come on Jocelyn, it's penetration. In Lima, Jocelyn, it's penetration. In Lima, Peru. They said they went to their local shop and overnight it had just sprung Christmas everywhere. Another line we're getting lots of international reports. Jess from London says Sasson Bell in London.

What's Sasson Bell? I don't know. A shop of some sort. Yeah. Boutique Christmas tree ornaments are already on sale. They're handmade. Ooh. From the cold London Christmas atmosphere to Kalgoorlie in Australia. Someone said, it's still October.

The Christmas tree is going up and it's currently 38 degrees, according to my car. 38 degrees. Which isn't good. I've got a confession here. Jess has messaged in. She said, I've always vowed

I wouldn't be responsible for Christmas in October, but it's finally happened. I work in a mall and I've had our Christmas decorations installed. Yes, it was I. Wow. We're the first mall installation

that is taking place according to the local installers. Yeah. And who puts up giant 1.2 metre baubles? Wow, cool. Huge Christmas trees and giant 12 metre wide presents. How do they choose? Maybe this is what I need to do if we get fired from here.

Sort out the festive installations for places. Well, that's something she said. It's a very small team of experts. They can't do all the decorations at once, which is what has led me to this predicament. And now I have 100 giant balls in my life in October. So we could go early because everybody else was there and you all everyone else had booked.

Yeah, right. So they could go early or they could go late. Too many balls. At once. As a gesture. Spread them out. Of goodwill. Don't be greedy with your balls, Jess. Too many balls. At once. As a gesture. I thought she could spread them out. Of goodwill. Don't be greedy with your balls, Jess.

Share them around. She's ensured that the Moral Radio will only play 25% carols from mid-November. Starting in December, it will be 50% carols. See, I think by December, 75% carols is your usual carol ratio. She's very sorry. And if Christmas penetration spikes, that's why. It's from Jess. It's from Jess.

So, 55 days away, and taking all that into account. Mrs. Claus, my coat and hat, please. Christmas penetration is at... 92%. Yes. Oh, it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. And if you see any reports of Christmas, send them in to our Facebook page, FBMZM.

On Facebook... Netflix has a new feature that they are experimenting with, and podcast listeners, audio listeners, will be familiar with this feature already. Netflix are going to allow you to watch TV shows and movies at 1.5 times the speed because apparently we live in a world where we don't even have enough time to watch a TV episode. Or a movie. But if you can watch a 60 minute episode in

whatever one in a half, and that's when maths got born. No, because it's twice time, 45 minutes. Because last night I was watching an episode and I was like, it got really late. It was like 10 past nine and I was like, one more 50-minute episode. And at that point, it would have been really helpful to watch it in 1.5. But if you've been watching a whole lot in 1.5 just like but if you've been watching

a whole lot in 1.5 you could have gone to bed earlier that's true but if it was meant to be viewed like that they would have made it like that you're gonna miss

all the timing of like the subtle drama and comedy hey you don't have to watch it later you have the choice to watch it slower I'll watch it faster it's just weird

I know that people listen to podcasts people have said they listen to our podcast on 1.5 I don't know how you can do that because we already talk fast enough I'll watch it faster. It's just weird. I know that people listen to podcasts. People have said they listen to our podcast. I don't know how you can do that because... We already talk fast enough. Yeah. It's weird.

I don't think I'm going to use the speech at all. But then if you accidentally knock it on half, it sounds like you're on the proof. Sounds like you're drunk. Yeah, it does. So one and a half times is just going to mean you can get through it a whole lot quicker, which is good if you're binge watching, but it'll definitely upset the people who made these. Apparently YouTube lets you watch clips two times the normal rate.

Oh, really? Yeah. Apple's podcast app offers 1.5 times and two times as fast, the speed. But I think if you get any more than that, you start sounding like chipmunks or the voices just go really high. We're going to get really trained at listening to things fast. Have you ever used Siri to read out your messages?

Because I get long texts, so you just get Siri to read it to you. How do you do that? You just go speak. You just highlight. You should get Siri to read out your last text message to Mr. Toyboy. Mine stopped doing that.

Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. No. No. Do it. The last one's real short.

I just want to see how this works. Come on. Don't be shy. You asked for this, okay? You asked for this. Here we go. What the hell? You asked for this, okay? You asked for this. Here we go. What a good snuggle this morning, face with heart-shaped eyes.

What the hell? Something about a snuggle this morning with heart-shaped eyes. You can slow that right down, you know that. Can you slow that down and then play it again? How do you slow it down? In settings, you go to, like, is it accessibility and speaking?

No, I'll do it fast, and you have to figure out what it says. Okay, go. What a good snuggle this morning, face with heart what it says. Loved a good snuggle this morning with heart-shaped eyes. Loved a good snuggle this morning with heart-shaped eyes? Yeah.

And then the emojis there. Told you, you asked for it. Okay. My heart doesn't do the speak anymore. I've managed to find some famous iconic scenes from movies. Okay.

And I'm going to play them back to you at 1.5 times the speed. Okay. 1.5 times the speed. This scene. Famous scene from Titanic. Okay. Hold on. Keep your eyes closed.

Trust me. I trust you. All right. Open your eyes. Fine. All right, yeah. That's the one we're on the front of the... The music's a lot punchier. The front of the boat, yeah.

Yeah, it kind of does. Okay, that's different. It makes the boat look like it's going real fast, like a speedboat. It made the wind sound. Okay, it was different. It makes the boat look like it's going real fast, too, like a speedboat. It made the wind sound. Okay, it was a bit hard to hear because it was outside. So we'll try a scene. This is a scene from Bridesmaids at 1.5 times the speed.

Hey, buddy. How you doing? I'm good. I'm so much more relaxed. Thank you, Helen. I just feel like I'm excited and I feel relaxed and I'm ready to party. You are the best. I'm going to go down to the river.

Wow, it looks like somebody's really relaxing now. Oh my God. That's really fast. It's a bit too fast, maybe? Does it make a difference if you're using a small clip and speeding that up 1.5 as opposed to using like a massive clip? Does it make a difference? I mean, it probably sounds better than this system,

but we'll try it. This is from Mean Girls. Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble, and I'm sorry I told everyone about it, and I'm sorry for repeating it now. I just wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school. I wish that I could bake a cake,

made out of rainbows and smiles, and we'd all be happy. She wasn't even going here. I thought that's a good movie. But too fast. Like, if you were watching that for the first time, you'd miss all of that. So I was thinking if you were re-watching it, it would be good at 1.5. But if it's the first time, yeah, you'll miss some things.

Do you want one from Love Actually? Oh, yes. Just to get you in the Christmas. This is going to probably put up Christmas penetration. Yes. So, what's the problem? Is there anything else? Is there something wrong?

Or is there something else? I can't even hear what's going on. What do you want to know? If they won't be able to do anything to help. Even if that's the case, yeah. Well, I can't even tell. That's Liam, Nathan and Sam, right? Sorry?

Yeah. I know I should be thinking about mum at the time. I am. I think he's saying if I catch you, I'll find you, I'll kill you or something. You've got a very special sense of scale. I can't work out what's happening here. But yeah, that's a Netflix feature. Fletch is not doing.

No, I'm not happy about it. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Yesterday it was announced that two 1980s, 1990s bands were coming. They're going to be doing a concert together, Scorpion and Whitesnake. And you've written them down on Facebook. So you didn't forget the names. No, no, I wasn't going to forget them, but I just wrote them down. They're playing. So this is the concert you want to go to for one song?

Yeah, that would be one song each that I've got that I'd go and see. But then that's the problem. If it was just one band with one song, you could probably time your arrival because they'll do it last because it's their most well-known song. Yeah. But then sometimes they don't do it. How dare they? Oh, they wouldn't.

I hate when bands do that. Oh, we're so popular because of this song. We hate it and we're never playing it. Radiohead did that. Radiohead never did. They don't do anything before, anything from that era. No, I think last year they did like one-off. They played it and everyone was like, whoa.

Yeah. They go to the show and they're like, oh, we're going to play some experimental stuff. You're like, oh no. Nothing's worse than going and seeing an old band where they're like, we're going to play some stuff of our new album. You're like, don't do that terrible idea. Didn't come to hear this. Nobody wants to hear this.

But that's when you go to the toilet. Yeah. Get a drink. Yeah. But you're right. That song will be at the end. Although the Killers, they opened with Mr. Brightside and the lights were turned on.

Yeah, but The Killers, you're not going for one song. The lights were turned on. Yeah, it's a thing they do. The Killers has got... They've got heaps of songs. They've got heaps of songs you'd go for. But this, they've only got one song. If you're a massive Scorpion fan.

Hang on, I'm going to just get through. I'm going to fast forward this to the... Great song from 1990. What an absolute classic. Scorpion, Wind of Change. This is the one song I'll go for. This is going back to your Bogan roots. I don't even know.

I just think I remember this from being a kid. Yeah, right. It's one of those songs you hear when you're a kid and then you hear when you're a teenager. Where's the bit in the... It reminds you of your dad's punishing mates. But then when you grow older, you're like, I am you of your dad's like punishing mates but then when you grow older you're like

I am one of my dad's punishing mates now here we go this bit this bit so you'd go just for this one song just this one

how do you know the words because I don't think what you were mouthing matches the what they're saying no I don't know the words it's just like it says when to change right but you would pay do you know how much tickets are I don't know the words, because I don't think what you're mouthing matches what they're saying. No, I don't know the words.

I guess he has wind of change. Right. But you would pay, do you know how much tickets are? Nah, that's the other thing. But would you, yeah. Because getting you to spend money on anything going out is hard, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah.

But I guess you'd consider, because you love this song. If you were to go to one of those concerts, it would be a great people watching experience too. Oh yeah, true. So you'd go for this one. My auntie Linda's having a night out. She's like, pride off my Home D bracelet to come to this. There's no way I was missing a bloody scorpion and white snake, mate. I'm going to get bloody ripped. Yeah.

I'm going to get so... She's definitely snuck in some Cody's into Spark Arena. Yeah. Down her pants. Go on. See if you can find them. You're right. No, no, I want you.

I want that handsome large Polynesian man to frisk me. No, no, you bugger off, girl. I don't want a woman touching you. All right, love. Here's your clue. There's a six pack Hidden down there somewhere Oh good lord Find them if you can

I can actually imagine This happening I bloody dare you You beautiful big man Okay Oh Oh Oh jeez

Those hands Soft They're warm What do you put on them Has anybody Has anybody listening This is what I want to know Gone to a concert

Or to buy a ticket to see a band For just one song You didn't care about any other song Or even know any other song But you went for one song Yeah It would be easier if the band had faded a bit And so they were playing smaller venues

And they weren't asking too much ticket wise. Yeah. No but I reckon for one song if it gets you if it's your song you'd still pay. Yeah. People would still pay. You'd just bang on the fact that maybe you'll like some others when you're there. Like a lot of new artists would get that? Yeah. Hmm.

Okay well give us a call. It's a lot of money though. 0800 DALS at M. You can text 9696. Are you like Vaughan? Have you been to one, to a concert for one song only? And what was it? Somebody said. No judgement. Somebody said they went to Def Leppard last year

and Scorpion opened for them and Wind of Change was fantastic live. Def and the World going for just that one song. Right, was it good? Did they mention the people watching? That would have been good people watching too. Oh, it would have been great people watching. We want to know when you went to a concert for one song.

Contemplating it. Contemplating it. You are, yes. Contemplating it. So some text messages in. Went to a feelers acoustic set back in the 00s. Back in the 00s. Me and my girlfriend were being all deep and stuff

and wanted to hear Fishing for Lisa. The only song. That's deep. Is that deep for you? Maybe her name was Lisa. Right. I don't know. I haven't heard that song forever.

I'm Googling on the system. I've found it. I've found it. Stand by. Good stuff. Stand by. Hang on, let me. Nah. Stand by Good stuff Stand by Nah Hang on let me

Nah I don't I didn't even tell you How many beers I've had No You totally skipped The line too

But the dude Got the crowd To sing it And I kept I kept shouting out I paid To see you sing it Dickhead

And we ended up Getting kicked out And I kept shouting out, I paid to see you sing it, dickhead. And we ended up getting kicked out. But that's a fair point, is I hate it when bands and artists do that. The crowd can sing it, but then they have to sing it as well. They have to sing it again. Yeah, again. They have to do that verse again if the crowd sings. Twice as long. Yeah, no, exactly.

Boom. Yeah. It's only fair. My wife got us tickets to James Blunt. Oh, exactly. Boom. Yeah. It's only fair. My wife got us tickets to James Blunt, but not even for one song, just because of the James Blunt impression I do when it comes on. So that's like even less of a reason to go to a concert. Say, Arnie, what concert did you go to for one song?

I went to Toto, a new plummet to hit Africa. Yay! A special place in our heart, that song. you go to for one song? I went to Toto, a new place to hear Africa. Yes! A special place in our heart, that song. So did they play it last? Yeah, they did, yeah. We wanted them to play it twice, so they did it.

Oh, God, imagine people going to that concert probably just wanted to hear that on loop, hey? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Because I don't think I know any of their other

songs. Yeah, you would. You would. Hold the Line, Rosanna. Hold the Line. Oh, right. Because I don't think I know any of their other songs. Yeah, you would. You would. Hold the Line, Rosanna. Hold the line. Oh, right. Did you know any of their other songs? Oh, no, I didn't.

Brilliant. Hey, thanks for your call. Richard, what concert did you go to for just one song? Oh, dear. The wife made me go to Snow Patrol. Oh, Richard. Which song? Sweet Disposition.

Which song do you think? There's only one. Snow Patrol was ever popular. Oh, no. Megan, Sweet Disposition is a temper trap. Oh, the temper trap. Chasing cars. Chasing cars.

From Grey's Anatomy. That's it. Chasing cars. From Grey's Anatomy. And did she go because of Grey's Anatomy? Mate, it was a flight to Auckland, a rental car, trying to find the stadium somewhere out west, but I had no idea where I was going to.

And then being the oldest person in the entire building, but there you go. Did you enjoy it? Did you enjoy it? It was fabulous. Fabulous. Richard, thanks. The description you gave pointed elsewhere.

Yeah. Hey, Richard, thanks for your call, mate. Adam, what concert did you go to to see one song? Yeah, I went to watch the Proclaimers for the 500 Miles. Well, they would walk 500. Yeah, that's it. Right. And was that good? Was that good, that one song? Yeah, it hundred miles. Yeah, that's it. Right. And was that good?

Was that good? That one song? Yeah, it was decent. Yeah, actually, all the songs are pretty good. And the crowd are quite funny actually. It was all old people. And then they actually got up and started walking towards the stage and then someone got on stage and had to get dragged off.

Who knew those were the raucous concerts? The proclimate. Did you know any of their other songs? Oh, no. I think I'd like heard one of them because when I was going to go watch them, obviously I went on Spotify. Yeah. Right.

What else are these guys? Better do some research. Adam, thanks for your call. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Post Malone, Circles. That's Megan and I's favourite song at the moment.

We turn it up loud. Vaughan goes out of the room. We're just having a discussion with the producers. Some of us have got to bloody work. Eleven past eight. You were having an argument in your household. Yeah, we're doing renos and part of it was I had to cut down this thing that was attached to the side of the house.

I had to use the chainsaw. Yep. Seems excessive. It was demolition. Did you have to use the chainsaw? Well, what else? Was I going to use a handsaw? Yes.

No. Nails. The nails. Oh, no, I just chainsawed away from where the nails were and then crowbarred off the little bit that was left. Sounds safe. Super safe. Super safe.

So the thing that I pulled off the side of the house is a pergola. Here we go. And it has been, because the builder said, oh, that's something you can do. And I was like, yeah, sweet, I can do that. And so I'd say to Sade, I might pull down that pergola. And she'd say, it's not called a pergola, it's called a pergola. A pergola.

Pergola, yeah. And I would say, you know, I'm pretty sure it's just an accent thing. It's a pergola. So then it became a bone of contention that neither of us would give in. I'm as basically what marriage becomes. Yeah, right. Arguments about stuff that doesn't matter, but you both dig your feet in and won't, you know,

see the other person's feet. You've got to be right. And it's like, because it annoys her because we've got a tangelo tree. Now, what annoys her is that I'm saying tangelo. Tangelo. I say that both ways. But I think her that I'm saying tangelo. Tangelo. I say that both ways. But I think recently I've started saying tangelo. Because I say tangelo.

Yeah. But I'm on your wife's side. It's a pergola. What? No, it's a pergola. I say pergola. You say pergola. It's a pergola. I say pergola to be silly. Pergola. But it's pergola. I've always said pergola. Well, I it came to a head. After I was pulling down the pergola. But it's pergola. I've always said pergola. Well, it came to a head.

After I was pulling down the pergola and a part of it fell. Can you see I've got a little mark here? Oh, yeah. Cracked me in the head. It is like literally two centimetres away from your eye. I know. It was quite scary because it took me by surprise. Oh, my God, you are such a mess.

So I said I get to decide on the pronunciation because it hurt me. And she said, no, you don't. You have to adhere to the rules of everybody and pronounce it like a pergola. And I say, it's pergola. Yeah. And I Google pergola pronunciation and I get, do you want to see what the nation said before you tell us the definition? Okay.

Because do you have a definite yes or no? Well, I put a poll on our Instagram story. Just let me, excuse me for a moment. I'll just change your Instagram account. But also what the masses say

is even if like, it might just mean the majority is wrong, you know? Yeah. 14% say it how I say it and 86% say pergola. Yep.

Pergola. I think that's just how pergola. Yep. Pergola. I think that's just how it's always been said. Pergola. For as long as I can remember. Yeah, pergola. Pergola. Pergola. What are you doing?

You're messing me up. So it's an Italian word. Is it? It's one of those words that we've borrowed from another language. Oh, no. And Massacre didn't give it our own version. We just were like, well, you've already done the hard work of inventing a word for it, so we'll just use yours.

I feel like the Italians would say pergola. This is the official British pronunciation. Pergola. I think, yeah. And of course, we are British English, aren't we? Yes. This is the American pronunciation. Pergola.

Pergola. Pergola. So Americans say pergola. And how do the Italian... Hey, here's a pergola Pergola Pergola So Americans say Pergola And how do the Italian Hey Here's a pergola Here's a pergola I don't know if that's

Oh okay Oh oh oh I've got This can't be a first name This is how to pronounce Pergola Pronouncenames.com We always go to this guys

Don't we Here we go Pergola Pergola That Pergola! That is the only way I say it from now on. Do it again. Do it again. Pergola! No, because they kind of...

They're paid, aren't they? Pergola. Pergola. It's kind of like a bit of both. Pergola. La pergola. Like a burglar. Yeah. Do we have the correct... But the way the Italians say it is more pergola, right? A burglar. Like a burglar? Yeah. Do we have the correct word? But the way the Italians say it is more burglar, right?

I like the first one. The first one was really good. Burglar. Yeah. So, what are we going with? I will say you all were wrong, except for the 14% who agreed with me. It does not include my wife, who made her side very clear on this and she's wrong. Why don't you go home and tell her I told you so.

I did. You're wrong. I did. How did that go down? Great. And what did she say when you played her that? No, well, we're not British. I'm like, well, we're the origins of the country.

More British than American. What did she say to that? No, well, that's not what you should understand. And I was like, well, you can be wrong all you like. Just know that your team of wrong is all wrong. Okay, was it worth you winning that? And then I went and had a tangelo off the tangelo tree. Because that's how petty I am.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Can we discuss people who put their phones face down? Because it could be like the chocolate things. Do some people just think that your phone, like they just put it down, face down?

I think if you are meeting your friends for coffee or dinner, it is nicer to put your phone, if you're going to have it on the table face down purely because you're not going to be

just purely because it's less distracting you always I would believe that if you weren't constantly

checking it but if you've got your phone face up if you get something you can look down and say like notification from Sansa. That's not worth.

You, like, stop down. I'm done talking to you. So do you. No, but I just leave. No, sometimes I don't though. I'm trying a lot. I'm trying to be... You said that with such conviction. It was such a great lie.

See, I would just keep it in my handbag. And for those who might not know, guys don't have handbags. Pocket, pocket. No, but I don't hate sitting down with stuff in my pocket,

so I always empty onto a table. I always think it's more rude to, if you're in a group sitting, to have your phone turned over because it's like, why, what are you hiding? No, see, I say, oh, look at it the other way. If you get a notification flash see, I say, look at it the other way.

If you get a notification flash up, I just, like, make the screen go black again. I just kind of, like, glance, see what it is, and then go back to it. No, I just lock it, and then... Okay. So, this study has looked into, they've used Ashley Madison,

so that's the extramarital affairs site. They've asked the people on this site, so philanderers, I think we call them. Cheaters. Cheaters. That's very close to philanthropist, isn't it? Philanderer. What does philan mean? Philan.

Because it's the start of philanthropist and philanderer, but they're very different. Okay, I'll go to the origin. One's giving all their philanthropist and philanderer, but they're very different. Okay, I'll go to the origin. One's giving all their money and one's giving all their other stuff. Love. Yeah. So this site has asked a bunch of cheaters how they communicate.

The answer, 56% of them use their mobile phones and they're saying they all flip them over. They flip them over so that you can't see. Hmm. Okay. So next came email. 44% of cheaters

are using emails. Really? I guess because then you can have like an online different email account maybe. Third place is dating sites. They, and then follow

closely behind DMs. Right. But DMs is kind of your cell phone as well, right? Yeah, I'd say so. Yeah. Same thing. But most people use their mobile phones as a prime source of contact for when they're cheating.

So we asked on our Instagram, a quick poll this morning, is putting a phone face down a sign of cheating? 15% said 100% it is. And 85% are like, no, it's not. 15%? What? Really? Yeah.

I don't think it's always cheating. It's just sketchiness. It's not 100% a sign of cheating. Not 100%, but I would be like, you think about it. If you've got a partner, like a long-term partner, and in the bedroom their phone's always flipped over, or like any time you're together, their phone's always flipped over. See, I think the key is when you've been with them for ages and their phone's never flipped over,

and then all of a sudden they're flipping it over. That's when you'd get sass. If they were just always a flipper over it. But if from day one they'd flipped over their phone. That's weird. But that from day one they flipped over their phone. That's weird. But that's always the thing about cheating. Changes in routine behaviour. Yeah.

So philanthropist and philanderer actually have the same origins. Right. Philandros, which is Greek meaning fond or lover of men. So you would be a philanderer because you love men. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Or you would be philanthropic because you of men. So you would be a philanderer because you love men. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

Or you would be philanthropic because you love men. Right. And you'd be like looking to help people. So they're the same, very similar words with wildly different meanings, but the same origins.

Does, back to the phone cheating search, do you have Sade's like thumbprint or face open on your phone? No, but she knows my pin code. Right. And like your, because our phones are just like kind of fair game. We just use whoever's closest.

Yeah. For photos and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And like, yeah, you can just grab it if you need to call someone or anything. Certainly my phone is not fair game. For either of you two.

We both have face unlock and thumbprints and stuff on each other's phones. And before you say anything, I didn't enforce that. That wasn't like, give me your phone and I'm going to put my face on it. Okay. You've really been quite offensive there, Megan. Are you sure? But he doesn't leave his phone face down. That's what I'm saying.

Right. I just think that's a bit weird Okay Not all phone flippers are cheaters But all cheaters are phone flippers Yeah right Yeah see that's Yeah Yeah okay

Okay So we can't bunch them all into one But the other way around we certainly can Right Fact of the day Day Day Day

Day Day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about the shortest reigning monarch of China. Okay. It was, by Western calculations, the 28th of August, 1620. Okay. So next year it'll be 400 years. Right. Since this happened.

And Zhu Kanglao became the emperor. Right. And he was celebrated. People gave offerings to him, including a lot of silver. He was like, thank you very much. And somebody, Lady Zheng, offered him eight maidens. Oh, okay. Eight maidens.

So he thought he'd celebrate the becoming emperor by enjoying some of his lavish gifts. The eight maidens in question. Yep. He became quite ill soon after. And the official diagnosis was excessive sexual indulgence. He had overdone it. He'd overdone it. Right.

Was he a bit of an old mate? No, no, he was young. He was 38. Oh, okay. He was 38. And he was then given some medication which caused severe diarrhea. Things are not going well for old mate.

He's an emperor. He's like, it's my birthday, baby. I just got two million tails of silver. I've just been gifted eight lovely maidens. Let's get down to business. Yeah. Have I ever done it? Does anyone have a Gatorade?

And they're like, no, but take this medication. And he's like, I trust you. You're my doctor. He takes it. It's a laxative. He gets severe diarrhea. Okay. They cancel his birthday celebrations. Oh, no. Which is upsetting. And then he gets given a red pill. He takes the red pill.

Yeah. And he's like, I feel much better. I'll have another red pill. He took a second red pill. He was dead the next morning. Not a month later. What was the red pill? They don't know, but apparently it's this big thing in Chinese history and Chinese folklore

about the case of the red pills. Okay. Yeah, that's all the situation. So one month was how long he was the emperor of China for. Wow. And what happened to the maidens? No word as to what happened

to the maidens. But did he get down with the maidens? That's what made him sick. Oh, yes, he did. He overdid it. Like, what was his diagnosis? Exhaustion. Right.

Exhaustion. And then the medication they gave him gave him diarrhea. Gave him diarrhea. So you can see how he went from the dizzying heights of being China's new rich emperor with eight maidens at his beck and call to overdoing it, getting the squirts, and dying. So basically I wanted today's Fact of the Day to also be a lesson. If you keep giving eight maidens, take it easy.

Take it easy. You've got plenty of time. It's like underpants with days of the week on them. One a day. Don't overdo it. God, that does my head in when you see someone wearing like Monday ones on a Wednesday. I know. You shouldn't get them if you can't stick to the schedule.

It does my head in. You're an adult. Don't have days of the week on your undies. Please. Just wear clean ones every day. That's a good theory as well. You don't want to have to wear your Tuesdays if you haven't managed to wash.

And you're wearing them next Tuesday as well. So today's fact of the day is the shortest serving Chinese emperor served for a month. And in that time he got two million tiles of silver, eight maidens, diarrhea and death. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Mail call. Mail podcast. Mail call. Mail arrived. Mail call. Caitlin just came in and I would say her tone was very accusatory. Is that a word? I don't know. Accusatory.

Accurately. Accusatory. Accusing. Accusery. She had an accusing tone to it. Oh, that works. That definitely makes sense. Yep.

And she accused us of ordering her something, but we didn't order her. We didn't order this, did we? No, I didn't. None of us. I'd just like to say accusatory is a word. But is that how it's pronounced? Well, hang on.

How else would you pronounce it? I don't know. Hang on. I'll click on the Google thing. We do a lot of this for accusatory. Accusatory. Accusatory. Accusatory. Accusatory time.

We didn't order it. What was in the mail, Caitlin? Someone bought and sent a book to me that says, it's not you, it's me. How to heal your relationship with yourself and others. And there's no, like, nothing in there. Warning, this book will make you fall Deeply in love With yourself

That's nice No someone heard That I'm now single And they think I need to mend My relationships With yourself With myself

Maybe what if you do No but like It's just being whole Without So you can be whole With Or something Yeah no

I totally agree with that But also like Who is sending me this book? Was there any note in there? Does it say like, Dear Caitlin? No. No, it's just an order form. It's an order form. Brilliant. Okay, wow. Your mum's getting

less subtle. Yeah, remember she bought me that book, Run Fat Bitch Run? That was good. Did she? Yeah. It's actually a really good book. Is the title like? Run Fat Bitch, Run. That was good. Did she? Yeah. It's actually a really good book. Is the title like? Run, Fat Bitch, Run. Yeah, but is that a little bit?

It's about running and enjoying running. She wanted me to start enjoying running, so I would run with her. Who wrote that? I don't know. Is it a New Zealander? No. No, okay. It's an overseas. No, no, no.

It's an overseas. I don't know if people have written it. No, I think it's Australian or something. But it was just like, get outside and go for a run, bitch. Ruth Field. It's by Ruth Field. 4.4 out of 5 on Amazon.com. Yeah, I remember when I had like boys over.

So what else was in it? No, it's just talking about like how to stop being so silly. Just get up and go for a run. That's chapter one. And then chapter two was like, stop eating lollies. You're not a child. Oh, so there's more to it than that. Oh, don't tell me what to do. Stop eating lollies. You're not a child. Oh, so there's more to it than just running. Oh, don't tell me what to do.

Stop eating lollies. You're not a child. No, it was quite good. It was like using the personal trainer in your head. I don't know, because mum likes to run, and she wants to do it with someone. And my sister's a lost type with running, so she was like, I'll get Caitlin to do it. Your mum knows you don't live in the same house as her. Like, running together is going to be weird.

No, I know, but she messaged. I've told you that. She messages me. It's like, oh, great weather up in Auckland. Great day to go for as her. Like, running together is going to be... No, I know, but she messages... I've told you that. She messages me. It's like, oh, great weather up in Auckland. Great day to go for a run. Oh, my God. This is what my mum used to do when I was a teenager. I'd be like...

Remember, I used to have to hide all my self-help books when boys came over. Because I'd be like... Well, there's just another one for your pile. You'll be fine. Give it a read. Okay. Yeah, maybe someone knows that you like those kinds of books.

Okay. Yep. And then tomorrow I'll tell you how to all love yourself. Not a problem. Okay, not in that way. Don't be gross. No, I didn't mean it in a gross way either. Whatever. You did. Stop playing with that ruler. It's weird. Put the ruler down. What, I'm just going to place

a ruler and it's just waving it round. Okay. He's weird. Put the ruler down I'm just going to place a ruler And it's just Waving it round Okay I'll put it down That's weird Just learn to love yourself And rulers I'm trying Everything Alright well you

Read a couple of chapters And report back to us tomorrow On it Oh there's like It's like interactive Like things that you can do Write down and stuff What like

Pick a path Self help No it's got a toolbox. Okay, what's in the toolbox? We'll wait. We don't have all day, mate. Just spitball a couple. We'll wait.

Just say a couple of things. No. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Don't worry about it. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Game of Thrones, the final season, we were all a bit like, oh, what happened?

It was rushed. It felt rushed. We can all agree, rushed. Yeah. So then when it was announced that there was a prequel in the works, set thousands of years before the events of Game of Thrones as we know it, Naomi Watts was in it. Yeah.

There was a pilot filmed. Apparently HBO executives watched that pilot, weren't impressed, and have pulled the plug on it. Yeah, so this is just news, just fresh out of the news oven, the breaking news oven, that it's cancelled.

Now, the David Benioff and, what was the other guy's name? The infamous showrunners. Yeah, the guys that did Game of Thrones who were with it the whole time. So the early days were like, great adaption of the books, it's good. And then lately we were like...

Yeah, they were kind of the fall guys for the last season, weren't they? The reason that it sucked. So it did fall on them. They were also going to be involved with the next thing. No, no. The next, the one that's been cancelled, the HBO that's been cancelled, not as heavily as they were the original Game of Thrones, but they were apparently going to be at the

helm of a Star Wars trilogy. But they've this week also had that cancelled. They said they've decided, they decided to walk away from it due to creative differences and they had too full of a schedule but I just looked on their IMDB and they don't have anything. They were wearing it as soon as they were announced for Star Wars.

Especially after the last season, people were like, get your hands off it. So David Benioff, one of the guys, he also wrote the story for Gemini Man, which is the Will Smith movie that has apparently already lost $75 million at the box office and isn't likely to be. But these are the guys that were involved with Game of Thrones

the whole way through, right? Yeah. I don't know, but how bad is that that they ruined one season and it was the most successful TV show in the world. Yeah, we've quickly forgotten that. Haven't we? And now they're like- Because of that last season.

Yeah. Wow. Oh dear. How your fortunes change so quickly. Maybe just don't mess up the final season of Game of Thrones. It's quite simple really, isn't it? So the only thing that either of them have announced is a TV show called Confederate,

where the Confederate States won the war and America split into two distinct parts. And slavery thrives. Ooh. Interesting. Big subject. Yeah. Big tackle.

Big tackle Big tackling ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast If you enjoyed this podcast Why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app Or wherever you get your podcasts

And you say Live's here ZM