ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - September 02 2019

Episode Date: September 1, 2019

August gave Vaughan a lesson over the weekend, Someone was brutally honest with Producer Caitlin and who did you edit out of your life?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music. Lives here. Fletch Warner Megan. The podcast. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch Warner Megan. Our very own affected by this Harbour Bridge issue. Megan, Caitlin, you both went past it this morning. Yeah, it was, the Harbour Bridge was closed. We were at a standstill for ages. But it's just a little truck. It's not like, in my mind, I thought it was a big truck and trailer unit.

Yeah, right. But it's just a little truck with a trailer. Completely upside down and completely charred. And it smelled like something. You know, like... Like burning? Not like burnt. No, like some kind of accelerant.

Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, but I hope everyone's all right. Well, it was pretty crazy. Well, yeah, your photos hopefully got out. I was not using my phone. What are we... We're all going very slow.

Traffic webcams. Were there other people? Did you see other people taking photos? We waited so long and then it was like drip feeding one lane to get past. But you wonder why everyone's going slow. It's because they're all taking photos like you. Hey, we waited so long and then it was like drip feeding one lane to get past. But you wonder why everyone's going slights because they're all taking photos like you. Hey, we waited so long. When you finally get there, you've got to give the scene a good, you know, once over. You're like, okay, yep, there's lots of, yep.

Heck, dudes, it's looking like at Northcote, it's stopped all the way back to Northcote traffic. If you can avoid going across the Harbour Bridge, I would. What would you... This sounds like a day off. Yeah. An excuse for a day off. It does sound like turning around and going home. If I can be totally honest and like playing it out.

Yeah, like I'm just looking on a map now and it's like traffic's backed up to the Wairoa Valley. Okay. Good lord. So. Well, bear that in mind if you're heading in. And wouldn't you believe it Bloody Onewa Road's a bottleneck

Onewa Road Unheard of That's a joke Specifically for people Who come down Onewa Road And all the time Everyone else is like Onewa Road's always a bottleneck

It's awful Always Always a bottleneck Alright you lot Listen up It's story time Hello All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. Hello.

Three news headlines. Three interesting, odd, quirky news stories that are found online. Vaughan and Megan pick one of the following three only. Headline one, surfer completes gnarly half twist to shark. Headline two, flying in the main cabin. And headline three, bad taste cakes. Bad taste cakes? I mean, the surfers come a mischief with a shark.

Correct, Walt? Shark's had a level. Yeah, you're right. He's been doing something and a shark's been like, not today. You've picked that one. What was story two? Flying in the main cabin. In the main cabin? Yeah.

Fly. Like the cockpit? Flying. No, the main cabin. I know, but I was... That's where we all fly. But what was flying? Look at your cheeky face.

You're not giving anything away. You do this. You try to get information out, and then you don't pick that story. What one do you want? That one. Yeah, because the cakes, someone's laced the cake with something, right? No. Oh.

Not at all. What's that story again? What's the headline? Bad taste cakes. You're not allowed to Google. They'll be the cakes that look like something. No.

You're not going to be able to point that out. I think I just wanted to hear what's flying in the main cabin. Please. I want to see if Megan's Googled. Have you found anything? If her skills are up to the job.

Why does my cake taste bitter? No. Okay, you're not finding that one. All right, so we'll go for Flying in the Main Cabin. Yes. M-A-N-E. I know what the bad taste cake is. Main.

What? The hurricane cake. Yeah. Hurricane Dorian cakes. Yeah. A bakery made, a supermarket bakery made. Cakes that look like the map, you know, when you look at a map and it's got the red eye of the storm. Why is that bad taste?

Is this going to be a bad one? Yeah, it's a Category 5. It's the biggest of the year. Oh, really? Where is it? It's been a long time. Currently over the Bahamas. Okay.

Yeah, kind of heading towards Miami tomorrow or the next couple of days. Right. Two separate Twitter users have filmed a woman travelling on an hour- a half American Airlines flight with her comfort animal. Oh, I know this story too. In the main cabin, M-A-N-E, a miniature pony.

You're allowed now. I remember that they were on the list. Yeah, I saw the picture of the pony sitting across their lap. I'm going to show you a picture of the... This is getting absolutely stupid and out of control. I'm sorry, but you can't take a miniature pony on a plane. But that's like, poor pony. Poor pony.

I don't want to be here. She doesn't need to take a pony. Like, look at it. It's jammed in the seat there. It's not... I mean, it's miniature, but look, it's not... But it's still jammed in there. Yeah, and I don't know... It's not, I mean it's miniature But look it's not But it's still jammed in there Yeah and I don't know That's a good looking

Minutes year pony Often you'll see them and they look They've got qualities of dwarfism Like the neck is pushed back And that is actually just like a tiny horse Well airlines apparently could face Fines if they block Travellers from bringing the pets onto planes

if they're designated as service animals. So people can obviously in America travel with emotional support animals. There have been cases where people have flown with ducks, kangaroos, and obviously your usual animals like cats and dogs. Kangaroos? That doesn't

seem legit. Surely they can decline animals if they're going to cause disruption to the cabin. Like a duck and a kangaroo could definitely cause some havoc. Oh, yeah. It's bizarre. So apparently they began boarding and people just could not believe

she got on with a miniature pony. Would they let me take on one of my goats? Probably. If your doctor, if this was America and your doctor said Vaughn is a nervous fly, he needs his goat.

Can't they just make a rule that service animals have to be ones that are like suitable? Well, yeah, yeah. But that's the thing. There have been emotional pet pigs, squirrels, hamsters.

And yeah, there's really nothing that the airlines can do unless they want to go to court and it's America. These people will sue. What happened to a handful of anti-anxiety medication and a couple of Singapore slungs? Yeah.

That'll get you there in no time. Showing you an emotional... Ostrich. Turkey. Turkey. Holy moly. Sorry, but this is... Come on, people.

Just absolutely stupid. Here's someone that looks like she's going to attack me. Sorry, but this is, come on, people. Just absolutely stupid. Here's someone that looks like she's got a coony-coony pig on a flight from Connecticut to Washington in 2014. It's just, it's out of control. Calm down. It's not that. It's America, though. There's lots of things they have to deal with before they deal with that. Yeah.

Yeah. Here's a list. Ever-growing list. Add it to the list. Ever-growing list. Fletch the list. Ever-growing list. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM.

The world's safest city to visit in 2019 has been revealed. This is by the Economist Intelligence Unit. Now, we're not on the... Intelligence Unit? No, we're not on, like, the top 10. Oh, right. Which led me to click on the top 10. Ah, right. Which led me to click on the whole thing.

It's got like, you might think, okay, well what does it take to be the safest city? I just thought like crime. But it's broken down into different categories. So, digital security, health security, which is why I'm all be low right now, infrastructure

security and personal security. Now, we get a score between 1 and 100, and then overall score is tallied up. So, do you want the top 10 of overall? Yeah, okay. 10 is Melbourne. 8 equal is Seoul. Okay. And Copenh Seoul. Okay.

And Copenhagen. Okay. Number seven is Washington, D.C. Six is Toronto. Five is Sydney. And the top four. Five is Sydney? Sydney's safer than us.

Yeah. The top four safest cities in the world is Amsterdam. Number three, Osaka. Two, Singapore. And number one, the safest city in the world is Amsterdam. Number three, Osaka. Two, Singapore. And number one, the safest city in the world is Tokyo. Well, I mean,

if you're taking into account digital security, there was that story that Auckland City Council just published a list last week of passwords their staff aren't allowed to use. So maybe we're not up to the,

maybe we're not up to standard yet as a country. Right. You know, just writing our passwords down on a little post-it, putting them on the Dell monitor, it's not enough. Yeah. What does infrastructure security mean?

That's like a tax on, I guess you could count protesting as one of it, if it was to block roads or. Yeah, I guess so. Infrastructure security would also be like how easy it would be to affect the water supply or the power supply or... Okay, well, we're sitting ducks, so... City infrastructure. Where we make it on the list,

18, Wellington. 18th equal. And personal security, Wellington is number five. So they've only taken the capital cities, have they? No, because Melbourne's in there. And Sydney. I think we've been classically overlooked.

Rubbish. Absolute rubbish. No, but Wellington's top five for personal security. Number five. That's pretty good. And then infrastructure security, Wellington's number nine. But yeah, I don't see any other cities of New Zealand in there. What so ebbs. Yeah, right. Okay. It's not good when we don't see Any other cities Of New Zealand in there What so ebbs Yeah right

Okay It's not good Whanganui That's I'm looking down the list Under low That's It's a beautiful

Safe place No yeah Renowned See that on the list Everybody feels Comfortable Lagos Is number

Is last on the list The unsafest 60 Well that's That's in Nigeria isn't it Yeah Nigeria's largest city on the list of the unsafest, 60. Well, that's in Nigeria, isn't it? Yeah. Nigeria's largest city from the Gulf of Guinea. And its little Wikipedia rundown doesn't say it's a particularly dangerous place. Right.

We're right down in health security, too, at the moment. 28. Well, there's a lot of measles. Well, that's because of the measles. Yeah. I think we don't even really deserve 28 at the moment. We'll just take all the anti-vaxxers and put them on a small island until they eliminate each other and then we'll be...

Uber Comfort is getting a trial this week in Auckland, Wellington and Christchurch. It's going to be lasting for three months and then it's going to be reviewed. Right. So this is, you might be thinking, what's Uber Comfort? It's more expensive than Uber. Oh. But there's some slightly more bougie options. Oh, okay.

There's, before you even get in, when you order it, you let them know your ideal temperature in advance. So if you like to run a car hot at like your 24s, you can let them know. Or if you like a cool ride, like an 18. Yeah, I like a cool ride. You can also let them know in advance. Right. That's one of the additional features.

Yeah. Another one's more legroom. If you sit in the back and you're quite tall. Okay. Because the Prius is sort of a mid-sized car. These are sort of bigger. Extra legroom and newer mid-sized car. These are sort of bigger, extra leg room and newer, mid-sized to larger cars. So these have to be

from 2012 onwards where I think Uber was a little bit older. Any kind of shitbox car. I don't know. No, but you can't even have a shitbox car if you're an Uber,

can you? No. They've got to be over-sanded, which is good. And to be a driver for Uber Comfort, you've got to have

4.85 star or higher and at least 500 trips under the belt. Does that mean they're going to talk lots? No, because you can ask for quiet mode when you book it. When you're asking for your temperature, you can also say, I don't want to talk. 15% more than the regular Uber rates. Oh, okay.

See, I like it. Have you ever ordered an Uber and it's like, oh, there are no Ubers. We'll have to give you an Uber, whatever, XL. Yeah, and you're just like, yes, free upgrade. Sit in the back of a van. Yeah.

But it's just more van, isn't it? Or a big SUV, yeah. That'll also give you a 10-minute wait time. Oh, yeah, okay. You know how they turn up and they wait at a spot? Yeah.

And you've got a little time to get down there and sort it out or you message them and you're like, please wait, please wait. And they'll give you 10 minutes of wait time. My problem is

what if after this three month trial it doesn't carry on but some Uber driver with like a crank and rating, 600, 700 you know, rides and a 4.9 Yeah. Invests in a new car, bigger car, more expensive car,

a newer car, and then they're like, oh no, the troll didn't work out. Well, he's just got a new flash car. Yeah, but back to ordinary Uber.

Yeah. Probably only drive it in surge time. Then some of those things, like you could just request those for your normal Uber. Just say, can you turn the heat up a wee bit? Can you pull the chair forward? I need more leg room.

Yeah, that's talking to people, isn't it? And then request quiet mode. And just say, yeah, I don't want to talk. Yeah. To you. Speaking to the parents yesterday, mum's excited.

Uber's coming to New Plymouth. Why is mum excited? Is she going to a few? Well, I don't know because I can't imagine her using it. No, neither. I wouldn't have thought she would have been a Uber taker. Yeah. I don't know.

I just guess it's big news. Just an option. She likes options. Big news there, yeah. She likes to see New Plum keeping up with the big smoke. And Nelson as well. Yeah, but I have to talk them through the Air New Zealand app, so I just don't, I can't even be bothered, like, breaking down the Uber app.

What's to talk through the Air New Zealand app? Here's your flight. They have to print out all that paper each time. I'm like, you just scan your code on your phone. Oh, yeah, no, they don't like that. No. They want it written down. They want a printed copy.

All right. Just a situation, if you've just woken up, for our Auckland listeners. There's been a fire on the Harbour Bridge. Oh, yeah, a road marking truck. Hit the medium barrier, flipped over, caught on fire. The person driving it is okay, it seems. As a result, traffic from the

shore into the city is absolutely routed, I believe the official... Shocker. Traffic. Or rerouted. Well, no, there is no reroute, unless you can get on a ferry. Yeah. Because anything taking the roads, the traffic now backed up to the Albany.

That's the whole northern from the city. Probably great for Beaufort & Co though. Oh, yeah, stop by Beaufort & Co, Otea Valley, get yourself a coffee and wait for the traffic to clear. Well, it's actually, it will be very nearly at Otea Valley Roadstone. Okay, so just stay home. Yeah, stay home. Well, you might be thinking,

well, I'll take Upper Harbour Highway and come in on the northwest and you probably won't be doing that either because everybody's thinking of that and traffic there is backed up past the Upper Harbour Highway bridge. So North Shore traffic is route 8. Yeah, route 8.

Go home. I'd get to a ferry if you really need to get to the city, but if you were just going through the city... Or just risk a bus fine. Those bus lanes always look sweet and clear. No, because in North Western, it's through a wall. It's got its dedicated bus lane now.

Or you can get on that if you try hard enough on. I think that's how the road marking truck ended up on its roof on fire, so we don't need to be encouraging more people to try to do a Duke's hazard, jump over the concrete barrier. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Everyone knows that kids sports can get really competitive.

Not so much with the kids, more with the parents. But apparently some parents are booing at kids games. What? So this is from someone who said there were kids booing at their six-year-old's netball game.

Here in New Zealand? In Australia. Somebody's admitted assault on a teenage referee at an under-12s rugby game. Yeah, that's crazy, eh? Yeah, this kid was like 15 refereeing a rugby game

for under 12s and one of the parents physically assaulted him. Oh my god. A kid. Yeah. So if you're wondering what part of the game, like maybe someone it was bad sportsmanship or something, it was when the opposite team scored a goal they were booing.

And it was the parents. The parents were booing and then when they scored a goal, they were cheering like it was the Olympics. Oh, wow. Because if you're that little kid shooting a goal, it goes in and then everyone's like loudly booing. What's that going to do for you?

That would be like you going to indie sports. Would you stand for that? I can't imagine you'd be on the sideline and you wouldn't say something. No. It's just horrible. It's weird that people always would do that, yet if they were on the other side of it, like if someone was booing their kid, that'd be a pull.

Yeah. The same sort of passion that makes you boo a six-year-old would make you want to fight someone that booed your six-year-old, yet they can't understand that it's not okay to do it. And like sports at that age is about learning things, you know, like being a good sportsman, just being a general good human. Well, if you don't teach them then about being a good sport, they're not going to ever pick it up later.

And how are they going to learn it when there's parents booing them on the sidelines? Yeah, it's just going to lead to us booing Quade Cooper, isn't it? God, we wouldn't do that. We wouldn't. Grown-ups boo. Would we? Surely not.

No. We don't do that kind of thing. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the top six. Hello there. Slate, which is traditionally used on roofs, it's a stone-like material and you can... What's the word for mine, but when it's with stones?

Quarry. Quarry it, but then when you whack it, it cracks off in thin bits. Yeah. Which has always made it perfect for roofing material. Yeah, right. Because there was an abundance of it in England. You can tile with it too, can't you?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or if you're Megan. Have it as a placemat and posters. Well, you go to anywhere like Freedom Furniture or Kmart now, it's everywhere. It's like everything. Your little cup mats. Super chic. Yeah. It does chip off if you're a bit rough with it. It can like everything, your little cup mats. Super chic. Yeah.

So it does chip off if you're a bit rough with it. Yeah, you can't be too rough with it. You can't be chucking it round. And the bigger it gets, the more likely it is to break. That's why roofing tiles are also on a certain...

It's all jaggedy and they're not perfect, so I don't like them because I've seen them... They're all different. They're all different. Everyone's different. It doesn't sit right with me. No, but I like that.

Everyone's have the same size placemat, not a different shape and don't like it. It's annoying because you have to carry one by one because it's super heavy. Yeah, and if you carried too many of them, it could. But anyway, so much has now been used for interior

design that there's a shortage for the people who want to use it for roofing and more traditional. It would look pretty slick, a tiled bathroom. Yeah. Like a tiled shower area. Yeah, true. And slate would look pretty. Yeah. Very earthy, natural.

Do your plants slide off it though? No. Okay. Well, my table's not slanted. What are you talking about? I don't know, I just wondered. Well, it wouldn't slide off it, though? No. Okay. Well, my table's not slanted. What are you talking about? I don't know. I just wondered. Well, it wouldn't slide off. Well, how a plate would sit on a slate, wouldn't it be all like, oh, I don't like that sound.

A slate's not like a slippery surface. It's got some grip to it. But you're right. It might be a bit like rubbing two seashells together. That weird sound. That happens. I don't like those textures together. I'm going to send you that sound when I get home.

So the top six other building supplies you can use for interior design. Number six, a paint tin lid as a pot holder. You know when you get a hot pot off the stove, you've got to put it somewhere? A paint tin lid. Pop it on the lid of your British paints. Sure can. And because it's metal, it won't melt. Don't use a plastic lid.

Disclaimer. It'll melt right through. Good call. And then melt into your bench made of, I don't know, something else you scavenged off a building site. Number five on the list of the top six other building supplies you can use as interior design. You know ducting pipe?

Like if you've got that, like an extractor fan in the bathroom and the silver ducting pipe. Yep. Stand that up, fill it with dirt. You've got yourself a pot plant. Okay. Especially if you like silvery robot leg looking pots for your fiddle leaf fig. Slinky covered in foil. Slinky.

The foil slinky. You can put it on your arms and pretend to be a robot. Yeah. Yeah. When they come and they put HRV in arms and pretend to be a robot. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When they come and they put HRV in your house, you're like, just leave those scraps behind. I'm sure we can find a use of that. I am a robot. Go on.

You know you'd do it if you had the chance. Yeah. Absolutely. Number four on the list of the top six other building supplies you can use for interior design. You know, ask the tradies when they're finished with the blade on the skill saw

if you can keep that for a lovely clock. Okay. Because it's round with the teeth. Yeah. And then you can get a bit of a clock

mechanism, put that in the middle. Ooh, that's a clock. Put that in your shed. Shed, yeah. Pool room. That'll go well

in the games room, wouldn't it? Don't touch it though, kids. It's still pretty bloody sharp. Number three on the list of the top six other building supplies you can use for interior design. Plumbing pipe. Yep. For handrails for the elderly. Okay.

It'll look pretty cool. And then along the side of the white pipe, it'll have that black laserwritten font to let you know what kind of pipe it is. Yep. PVC, 150 something. Yep. I love a bit of that. Number two on the list of the top six other building supplies you can use for interior

design. If we're using roofing material for placemats, in the case of the slate, why not some other roofing material? Corrugated iron placemats. You have to put an edge on that. Very, very sharp edges. But easy to clean. Just put it outside in the rain and for 25 years it'll just run straight off.

Yeah, nice. That's their guarantee. Okay. And number one on the list of the top six other building supplies you can use for interior design. Liven up that dull couch with some pink bat cushions. Oh, does that sound comfortable? Yeah. They are warm.

Warm. Yep. And comfortable. Itchy? Very, well, a little bit. Yeah. If you're going to try to find a negative to it, it might be a little bit itchy.

That is today's top six. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. A man called Chris Mansfield was due to be in the next season of Married at First Sight New Zealand I know Did we need that? Another one Okay

Well, an ex who lived in the States has come forward She obviously had no idea this was happening And then, I don't know Maybe had a Google alert set up with a person's name because she said that the relationship was rife with physical and mental abuse. And she's been through a whole lot. And another ex has come forward also to bring light to the situation. They say they're not doing it out of vendetta, concern.

Like this person, when this does come out, this person who's been televised in a relationship with them's yeah, you know, gonna be something else. So this was due to start September 8th, so a week today. They are editing them out of the entire series

which isn't a problem when it comes to their wedding and their segments of the show, but they take that out, let's say on average they were making up 10 minutes of an episode, but they take that out. Let's say, on average, they were making up 10 minutes of an episode. Now you've got to find 10 minutes of additional... Oh, God, it'll be a nightmare. And also, like...

But rightly so, he's been... 100%. Rightly so, he's been cut out, but a week ahead. And the dinner parties? Yeah, if you've ever edited a video, how will they... I mean, surely he'll be in the background

of a dinner party. Yeah, surely. That's the other... What are they going to do at the he'll be in the background of a dinner party. Yeah, surely. That's the other. What are they going to do at the dinner parties? Blur his face? Oh, God. Surely they run background checks, right? What if he was like a central character?

You just think of some of the characters that have been in the past that kind of dominate that show. Like, how? So I talked to someone who's worked in casting for TV shows before. Yeah. Saying the general way, you run a background check in the country that they're living in, like New Zealand, and nothing on New Zealand records.

But if someone's been out of the country for an extended period, because you go into their background, and they've been out of the country for any more than a few years, you would typically get details. You'd run a check from there as well. So it's lazy. So someone obviously hasn't done that because his name would have been associated to these cases.

And there would have been some flags. I know. So... How the hell? Oh, I'm sure... Like, I feel for the editors. Yeah, if you've ever edited a video, to then be told to go back and...

Not just take out a swear word or a line, but an entire person's existence throughout the show. And again, rightly so that he's been cut from the show. 100%. Not disagreeing with that. I just feel for the editors. But not only if they're going to edit him out, they have to edit his partner out.

So she can't be in any shows that won't make any sense. I saw she was doing some press at the weekend. She was like, there goes my 15 minutes. I would like to know, obviously, unless you're the Kardashians or a family that's had a reality show, it's probably not going to be to this extent, but I'd love to know who you've had to edit out of your life. Maybe it was someone out of a wedding photo.

That's a massive one. People do that, don't they? People get able to Photoshop out certain people. Yeah. Yeah. It's a lot of effort. Yeah. Whenever I'm at weddings and people's, like,

relatively, like, new partners that you don't feel like on the last five ages, if I'm at a wedding and there's photos being taken and there are heaps of them, I'll always say, maybe just the family. I reckon just the immediate family. Just the immediate family. I always step out if you're in a relationship

and it's reasonably new. You step out. Take one with, take one without. Because you just don't know. Do the right thing. And you've got to be the person, if you can see it, you're like, oh, and now just the men. Or just the kids of the people.

Some people can't read the room, can they? No, no, famously. And then don't see it coming when they get broken up with and they have to be edited out of photos. But I was just thinking maybe even work, like workplaces might have had like a photo. Yeah. Like a staff photo

and then someone left immediately or on like bad terms so they were scrubbed from the list. Like a fletch left. We just have to be born a Megan

and then we just have to scrub them off the edge of the photo. I'm on the end of the photo. Yeah, just get rid of it. Scrub them off. We just delete born in the middle

and then shove us together. Or just do a new photo. Oh yeah. That get rid of it. Scrub them off. We just delete born in the middle and then shove us together. Or just do a new photo. Oh, yeah. That's also a possibility. That's something you could do easily. It's not like a wedding. A wedding, you can't redo those photos, can you? No.

So maybe you did have to edit an ex or someone out of a photo. Whoever you had to edit out of your life, 0800 dials at M. We want to take some calls now. And give us a text 9696. So the new season of Married at First Sight have had to edit out one of the grooms after domestic assault charges. Yeah, from the States. Have come to light. Yeah.

So he was meant to go to court in the US and then just fled the country. And there's still an outstanding warrant for him. This all missed the background check. They've had to edit him out. And we want to know when you've had to edit him. And rightly so. Yeah. Again, we'll say rightly so. Damn right, rightly so. When have you had to edit them out. And we want to know when you've had to edit. And rightly so. Yeah. Again, we'll say rightly so.

We'll say damn right rightly so. When have you had to edit someone out of your life? Maybe you've had to go back through photos and edit them out. Megan, have you had to edit any photos out? No. You just had another marriage. You know. But then you're not embarrassed about that.

You talked about that. You don't deny that it happened No It's a part of your life But I do hide those albums on my Facebook Because I just don't want people going through those Yeah That's just for me

Yeah That's just for my own memories Okay Fair enough Kirsty Who have you had to edit out of your life? Hi There was a guy that I met up with in Bali

that I had originally met at uni that my parents didn't like, so I had to edit him out of all the pictures I was sending them of when I went to Bali. Right, so you're like, let's take a picture of us and then just one of me. Yeah. Right, okay.

So he was in these photos, you were just cropping them out or you'd take additional photos of him without? No, yeah, there was like a lot of pictures of just me and then my mum was like, oh, who did you get to take that? And I was like, oh, someone I met at the hostel because I went on a solo trip.

Right. So like solo trip quotation marks. Okay. Yeah. So it was like a live edit. It wasn't like a, like a, oh, I had to cut them out or anything like that. Right. Edit and post.

But yeah. Very true. All right. Hey, thanks you, Cole. Joseph, who did you have to edit out of photos? My ex-girlfriend. Had a nice framed photo of me, her, and my two oldest friends. And I edited her out by sticking a Nerf bullet over her face.

Oh, so you've still got the actual photo like in a frame but you've just stuck a Nerf... She's got a sticky Nerf bullet on her face. Yeah, it's a good photo. It's a good idea. Does anybody ever ask who's under the Nerf dart? Oh, every time. Yeah, it's quite...

It draws a lot of attention to the... But it's better than learning how to use Photoshop, isn't it? Because you've got to sign up to that big cloud thing. You can't illegally download that anymore. Yeah. Absolutely annoying. No, no. Thanks, you're cool.

Joseph? Our old work had a Christmas card that we got sent around. Everybody was in it. Yeah. And when they were Photoshopping on the Santa hats for everybody. Yeah. My boss said, I'll edit that person out because they're going to be laid off before Christmas. And when they were photoshopping on the Santa hats for everybody, my boss said, I'll edit that person out because they're going to be laid off before Christmas. And it was ruthless because one person found out about it

and told everybody else that's how they found out they were losing their job. Brooke, who did you have to edit out of your life? Well, on my grandma's fridge, there's a family picture with my whole extended family. And then on the corner is my ex-boyfriend from two years ago. Right. It's not only him, but it's my ex-stepdaughter as well. So I've had to put a magnet over his face because grandma won't let me take it down.

This is very better than Photoshop, isn't it? It's the easy option. Just put a magnet over. Where am I supposed to be? Could you cut him out but keep the photo on the fridge? Is he on the edge of it? I've thought about it, but I think I'd have to cut my brother out as well because they're kind of standing next to each other and being buddy-buddy.

Yeah, no, get rid of them. Nice. All right. Get rid of them both. Hey, Brooke, I've got a prize for you. Thanks to them buddy buddy. Right, yeah, now get rid of them. Nice, alright. Get rid of them both. Hey Brooke, I've got a prize for you. Thanks to themarket.com I've got silk and steel earrings that are worth $239

just for you. Awesome! Thank you so much. That's so good. Thank you. In the market, check out the market. Megan, you're all over this.

I've got a $4,000 wish list you can register to win at ZM Online. Alright. No. Any more ticks? Yeah, there's a few got a $4,000 wish list. You can register to win it and see them online. All right. No. Any more texts? Yeah, there's a few more texts. Oh, okay.

Get to those. Somebody said I had to edit from my hen's night. A friend of 10 years, I had to edit her out because she didn't turn up to my wedding because apparently on the day it was too hot. What? So we edited out of the hen's doing anything to do with the wedding. It's a great friend. Yeah. Great friend. It's was too hot. What? So we edited out of the hens doing anything to do with the wedding. It was a great friend. Yeah.

Great friend. It's just too hot. It's too hot. You can have shade and fans. I'm melting and I haven't even left the home. Tell you what, I'm going to pass. I'm sure you'll have a great time without me. It's not really about me, it's about you.

But what, you've paid for me to be there? That's okay, don't worry about it. Yeah, great. That's fine. I sure hope this pre-recorded laughing isn't after something inappropriate to laugh at, but I just want to take a moment to say thanks to Spark for sponsoring the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast.

You can grab Spark's $29 prepaid rollover packs and get stacks of extra value. Back to the podcast. You guys always make snide remarks about how women hold and bank something, only to bring it up later. Do not. Well, there's been a study that's been done.

617 studies conducted between 1973 and 2013. So big study over a long period of time. You'd say quite conclusive. Quite thorough. They have found that women have better recall when it comes to remembering specifics. So it could be brought up later in an argument and you go, you said

this and they say, no you didn't. And you say, you bloody well did. You bloody well did. You bloody well did. Women have a better recall when it comes to specifics. So it's all down to episodic memory. So that is the ability to recall autobiographical events such as what happened last week

or whether you shut the door, turned the oven off, that kind of thing. Right. Do you have a couple of these banked with Mr. Toyboy at the moment? Always got a couple of them to go. What have you got ready to go? No, I don't. Come on, just give us an idea.

Well, that's just amateur wifing then if you don't. No, but I'm not going to tell you about my beach on... Save it. No. Surely. Just give us one example. One example. No, see, this is the thing about banking it up.

You don't... It's just there. It's sitting back there. Mine? Yeah. I'll tell you what shout I'll have against me. It pops up. Because I play dumb, but I totally know.

And that's the thing. Guys are always like, what? But we know. When I just buy power tools, but just put them straight in the garage and don't like show them to her. That's no different than what she does. She buys clothes.

With the online shopping. Yeah, yeah. Says, oh, this old thing, I've had it for ages. Are you kidding? That's no different. Power tool lasts for years and years and years, doesn't it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it does actually. And it's actually helping maintain the family home. How much is your power tool compared to her latest Decubus shopping bill? No, you can't compare it to one latest shopping. You have to compare it to, you have to go total, surely. You go total. You can't just say latest. Power tools are wildly different.

That's so expensive. Yeah, because I've never seen a power tool put in a clothing bin with a tag still on it. Yeah, quite often bought to buy a power tool and never use it. Yeah, and I'll just be like, and then I'll use it once and I'll be like, well, I can't use that again. Heck, what if someone sees me using that again? But you can't help it if at that time you thought it suited you

and then when you go to put it on, you're like actually, I don't think it suits me. It's not becoming. And where were you then? You weren't there to tell me. Well, no, I don't think it suits me. It's not becoming. And where were you then? You weren't there to tell me. Well, no, because you're buying it in secret. You're not giving us the opportunity to... You're losing this argument, Megan. To say it. Oh, yeah, okay.

Anyway, so we have better recall. But somehow, I would lose this argument at home. Yeah, hell is it? Yeah, right. I can't explain it. Because you have a couple more things banked up. Have a couple more things. Let's write some other things. So while females' episodic memory is better,

so things that specifically happen, you are better at one particular recall. So say you park the car somewhere, you have better recall on where to find the car because your spatial processing is better. So, I mean, you've got something. Don't be angry at us because your spatial processing is better. So, I mean, you've got something. Don't be angry at us because we can spatially process.

No, I'm just saying, like, you can remember where you park the car, but you lose everywhere else, so we'll give you something. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. You will have noticed lately in the news, a lot of stories about measles. Measles getting a foothold again after, I don't know, it felt like it was gone.

I know. It's weaseled its way back in. Some 800 and something confirmed cases. Ever increasing. Our health system being put under strain where most of it could have been avoided by a simple immunisation. But heck, we're not doctors, but she is. Hello and good morning, Dr. Sarsh. How are you?

Hey, man. How's it going? Very good. Thank you very much. Now, I'm just reading a story about Auckland's secondary schools being put on notice because St. Peter's had their ball and one of the students who went from another school had measles, it turns out.

And now 20 more schools have been put on notification as students from 20 schools in total went there. So they could have contracted it and take it back to their schools. So what do we do? Well, what we do is hard because it kind of breaks a bit of a tipping point. But measles is an incredibly contagious virus. If you have measles and you come across anyone who's unvaccinated, they have about a 90 odd percent chance of getting the virus. So that's what I was going to ask is if those kids in that room weren't vaccinated and they

came into contact or even if they were just in that room, how likely is it that they would get it? Well, measles is a respiratory, you know, it's passed by water droplets and those water droplets can remain alive for, you know, the virus can be alive for a couple of hours and it's vaporised, so it's in the air. So they come across, if any kid who's unvaccinated comes across the virus. Yeah, I think it's 95% chance they'll get measles. And the virus is so contagious that like one person can infect up to 18 people. And then one of those 18 can infect another 18.

So it's probably one of the most contagious viruses there is. It's like the world's shittiest pyramid scheme. It totally is. So that's like the world's shittiest pyramid scheme. It totally is. 100%. Wow. So obviously a lot of people are saying we live in this world of misinformation where people are influenced online. And is that playing a big part in what you're seeing?

Parents that are getting misinformed? Yeah, I think it's there's obviously this rise in the whole anti-vax thing but there are people who are also getting measles who are vaccinated as well because there's a small cut through for the vaccination. I think it's about 2% of people who are vaccinated may get the virus but it's a much

milder form than someone who's unvaccinated so there is a huge amount of misinformation and fear and worry about vaccines, but evidence is pretty solid that it's awesome and it does its job and the risks are very, very, very, very small. So for someone like I was vaccinated as a kid, do I need to get a top up? Would I be best to get a top up? What's the... So the rule of thumb is if you're born before 1969, they presume

that you had measles because that was before we had the vaccination. When the vaccination was introduced, they're basically saying if you can,

you or your mum can remember that you had two shots of the MMR, you're sweet as, right? But if you only

had one or you can't remember, then you need to sort of dig into it a little bit deeper and find out more or you might need a booster. Oh, it's time to get out the plunket book. Yeah, mate. And see how big your head was on the percentage scale. Spoiler alert, mine was in the 95th percentile. It's a big head, it's a big head.

A massive old melon. So is there any cure? Like, what do you do if you have measles? Well, measles is a virus, just like the flu, right? But it just creates more serious complications.

So the way measles presents, well, you know, shows up, is you start getting a rash, a fever, and then you get a rash, which usually starts either inside the mouth or around the face or the hairline. And then it basically starts spreading down the body.

So the rash starts spreading down the body. It's kind of a pink, flat kind of rash, and it makes you feel really sick. Now, most of the time, people just ride it out. They feel really unwell. They kick to the curb for a couple of weeks, but they eventually get through it, just like a really gnarly flu. But the problem with the measles is that 15% will end up with serious complications and then one out of a thousand ends up potentially dead. So that's the problem with measles.

It's got a very high complication rate. It makes people very unwell. And we're seeing more and more kids and adults coming to hospital with not only measles but these second, you know, these bacterial infections like pneumonia and stuff like that because their immune system

is so nailed because the measles virus is super sneaky like it basically gets into the immune system and there's a first line of defence and you sort of think, ah, sweet as, we're all good and then it kind of cracks on and has another wave

and that's what happens. Yeah, yeah. So it's not too messed with. As a parent, if you're not going to vaccinate your kid, you're really putting them more at risk than any of the tiny risks associated with getting a vaccine. Yeah, yeah, pretty much. I mean, like anything, like paracetamol, for example,

is a drug that has things that happen and cause people to feel unwell, but it's widely used, and it's the same with vaccinations. From time to time, there are a small number of people who have a bad vaccine, like they might get a little rash or a sore arm or whatever. So I think the risks are very, very marginal in comparison to the benefits that you get, like not dying or not getting a serious illness.

Not dying is always... Yeah, that's how I like to start my Monday out, not dying. Yeah. Yeah, same here. It's very good to hear from a medical professional on this. Dr Sash, thank you so much. No worries. Thanks for having me. Eliminated, I'm laughing

because she's literally just run in the door. Eliminated from Celebrity Treasure Island last night. Lily, good morning. Good morning. Take a deep breath. It's going to smell like wine if I breathe too deeply for it. A big night last night, was it?

Yeah, I feel like with every elimination, you need a, yeah, yeah, it was like a cabs have. You need to compensate. It's emotional, but it was good. Did you guys enjoy the episode? I'm loving it. I'm actually addicted. It's funny, huh?

I'm so addicted, yeah. That's a good time. Do you continue watching now? No. There you go. I'm actually addicted. It's funny, huh? I'm so addicted, yeah. That's a good time. Do you continue watching now? No. There you go. Stop watching the show. You're right. No, I didn't mean everybody.

I just mean like you. Do you know what happens after you leave? Yeah, I've had all the D-Lo gossip kind of stories. So I know what happens. I'm not going to spoil it for you guys. But yeah, I mean. Yeah. Stop watching.

You're watching a file. Because when you got eliminated from the island from the game did you get to stay there or did they send you home straight away so I got two nights in the hotel you're supposed to just get one but because I was flying back to Wellington everyone else was flying back to Auckland you didn't have as many flights so I got like a two day bender in the hotel it was great nice amazing um what is it really like being there because they're all like i'm hungry and stuff but like are you getting fed it wasn't that bad we had nine liters of chocolate ice cream as you saw last night that gave us all the shits obviously because it's dairy yeah i

haven't had dairy in a while um but you know it was amazing i was having a good time food wise i don't know what Team Marco was all about. Well, yeah, I was talking to Matty McLean about the, and he said he'd do it again just for the weight loss. Yeah. He said he'd do it again. The forced weight loss. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because I saw him right when he came back and he was, like, skinny and tanned. He was like, yeah, this won't last. Matty tanned? Are you sure? Tanned for Matty. It was like fawn. His skin was like fawn colour as opposed to translucent. Maddie's version of tan.

Not tan, but medium. But you had a pretty rough ride on the island. You got sick. Yeah, I did. That sounded really serious. So what happened? Well, I thought it was going to be something cool like malaria or tapeworm, but I think it was just a flu.

You know when you get that sometimes and it just lasts. It's not really that long. It sucked at the time because they wanted to send me home and I was like, nah, I'd way rather go out trying, like at least stacking cats and like vomiting at the same time, I'd rather do that than just go home for no reason, you know what I mean? So it was good for me to get back in the game,

but yeah, it was a little bit frazzled, I think. You're getting over the flu, but I was just trying to maintain mind over matter, good attitude. Do you like the way you were portrayed I think you were you came across really well in the show yeah the thing about reality television and being portrayed is like if you are who you are and you say what you say and you believe in what you say then how can you hate how you're portrayed because that's what you said and that's who you are. And you're a veteran at it now. Yeah, a little bit. I don't know. I don't talk

too much S-H-I-T but I'm not mad about it. Is there anyone on there that you just found really hard to deal with? It's so interesting because not really. It's not like The Bachelor where it's made for drama. They're trying

to get everyone. This show is just a good time and I was really, really happy with my team. It sounds a little bit like it was a shambles just looking at it from an outside but we're this weird,

happy, disorganised family. It was nice. And I was going to say to you, who do you think wins but you already know. Oh, I already know.

I don't want to tell you guys though. Was there any, have you signed an NDA or is this just trust? I'll just tell you, I already know. I don't want to tell you guys though. Was there any, have you signed an NDA or is this just trust? I'll just tell you, I won. Okay. Oh yeah, twist.

You're back. She comes back. You're back. They re-look at the footage of the cats falling and they said, no, we cooled it before she's back in

and then she wins. I come in carrying many cats. Many cats. Out of the water. They love water. Water cats is great. All for the stacking. They love water. Water cats is great. All for the stacking. You'll see.

Well, Lily, it's fun seeing you on our screens again. I'm sad it's over, but I'm sure we'll see you again soon. Thanks for coming in. No worries, mate. Thank you. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, producer Caitlin had an awkward moment on Friday. And we're, I don't know why, but somehow it's our fault.

We're in the firing line for this. So, well, yeah, because I thought, and I know this, you had this agreement with Megan Vaughan, but I just thought it would, like, go for me as well. She tells me if the back of my head ever gets so fat, I get those fat bald guy rolls on the back of my head.

I have to tell you. Because I don't see the back of my head. Yeah. So, if that happens, she's the first to tell me. Will you tell me too? What if I get those? Well, if you put your neck back like that, you get it. But no, I'm not sure of you. Come on.

Even if you're skinny, if you sit like that, you get a little puku. Come on. Don't do that to yourself, please. Don't. You know, you're both safe from those at the moment. Okay. Stop comparing yourself to the hot, bald Instagram models. They're a living and unrealistic lifestyle.

So that was, and you would tell me and I would tell you if you had started to get a moustache. But I would do it in a, I wouldn't do it on air. I'd do it in a subtle way. You'd do it in a subtle way off air and then do it on air.

Thank you. We hadn't clarified how you would do it. No, I'd probably do it when we're leaving work and I'd be like, are you getting the lift? Because I'm on the basement level two and Megan's on basement level one. And then we could lift sexism. And she's like, oh no, are you getting the lift? Because I'm on the basement level two and Megan's on basement level one.

And then we could lift sexism. And she's like, oh, no, I'll take the stairs. I'll be like, oh, I'll take the stairs too. And then we'd get into the stairs and the doors would shut behind her. I'd be like, I've been meaning to tell you about the moustache. The moustache. And then we'd use the lift or the stairwell footage as a hilarious video of that time you broke the news to Megan that she had a moustache.

Well, it wasn't you guys that told me that I had a moustache. It was a lady that looks at my vagina all the time as well. So it was a really comfortable... She takes care of the vagina moustache. So, because I went to get my, I think it's my fourth round of laser for my underarms and down there. Yeah. And because, I don't know, I've been looking in the mirror lately and I was like, nah,

it's not. And then I'll go back and I'll be like, is that a moustache? I wasn't sure. Like a fuzz. Like a fuzz. I think I've got a hot fuzz. And so I even asked my mum and she was like, don't be ridiculous. I didn't even look at it.

And I went, Parnia, she's lovely. I went to her and I was like, no, no, no, this is my laser lady. Your laser lady's Parnia. I said, hey, can you be honest with me? Is she the one that's going to inherit our buttholes? The laser ring? Because our laser butthole lady's left. Can you handle, like, real hard truth?

I want the hard truth about back there. Okay. I feel like it's, I think everyone's tippy-toeing around it. What did she say? Well, no, because I said to her, I was just like, I've got a really

serious question because we talk about everything and she's like, okay, hit me. And I was like, do you think I've got a moustache? And she straight up

looked me in the eye and said, absolutely you do and you need to get rid of it right now. And I was like, wait a minute, let's talk this over.

She's like, it's her job. I know. And so was like, wait a minute, let's talk this over. She's like, no. That's her job. I know. And so she got out the razor and just dry lips, dry shaved it off. She was like,

no, you need to like, put your glasses back on. See that? That's a moustache and we need to sort this out. Yeah. And so she lasered it

then and there. Then and there. She shaved it and then lasered it. And she said, look so much, oh my God, look how much it. And she said, look, so much. Oh, my God, look how much better this is. Oh, you look so different.

She razor'd it. I've never had a razor to my face. No, just the upper lip. But, like, now I've got to be really careful in the sun because I might just get an upper brown lip up from the top. Oh, my God. I can't believe she straight up razor'd your lip. I'm actually, like, you need people like Pani in your life

because otherwise nothing ever gets done. Your mum was obviously blatantly lying to your face. And all of you have been walking around with a moustache. Does she use the same laser that she uses? Yeah. Does she give it a wipe at least? You don't go straight from there to mouth. You don't go there to mouth. You don't go there

to mouth. No, you go lip and you work your way down. Lip up it. Yeah, yeah. So I literally, apart from my eyebrows, hairless.

Right. Hairless from the eyebrows. And your hair and your arms. And I'm worried I'm going to start getting a goatee, but she didn't shave that.

Yes, if you've got a soul patch, I'd be so into that. I'm getting a zhuzh too. I wonder if she's going to tell, I'm going to ask her if I'm getting a zhuzh too. I wonder if she's going to tell. I'm going to ask her if I've got a moustache. She sounds like she's delivering the brutal sort of honesty. No, no.

Give me a look. No, I, I, I. No. No, I don't. I've not looked. Show me again. No, I'm too scared. No, just take your hand away.

This isn't the place to tell me. Take your hand. Have I got a moustache? F too scared. No, just take your hand away. This isn't the place to tell me. Fletch. Nah, that's not going to wear the wrath of Parnia's blade and laser. No, because I did have to pluck that hair from your chin that once came in. You should tell her to hit that hair on the chin. No, I get three horse-like hairs that come from the bottom of my chin and I have to pluck them.

And sometimes I have to pluck them too. And sometimes Megan does this. Good friends do. Okay. Maybe I should get my nose hairs done. Oh, my God. No, that's a waxing stitch, isn't it? I don't know if they do that.

Everyone needs a partier. That's true. I think you're fine, Megan. I think you're fine. Okay. I'll give you an update after I've seen Parnia. She's going for a super close-up on her phone. Yeah. I think you're fine, Megan. I think you're fine. Okay. I'll give you an update after I've seen Parnian. She's going for a super close-up on her phone. Yeah.

I don't think your phone will show you. You've got to have the light on. Yeah. Yeah, it can make it look shady. That's what happens to me. Okay, well, can we take some calls now? When was somebody brutally honest with you? Tracy on my Instagram said the other day that I should go back to my natural hair colour.

She's like, it's not working for you. Tracy. I don't know who Tracy is but I thanked her for her honesty. It's easy to be brutally honest on Instagram. Yeah.

Isn't it? Yeah. When you're, you know, obviously a hot Instagram model and, you know, you're passing judgement on everyone else's photos.

I've never seen an Instagram model called Tracy. You don't see many model influencers called Tracy. And next, down the Victoria's Secret catwalk called Tracy. You don't see many model influencers called Tracy. And next down the Victoria's Secret catwalk, Tracy. Hi, I'm from New Zealand. I'm Tracy.

Perfect in every way. So about your hair. All right, so when was someone brutally honest with you? Maybe you wanted to hear it like Caitlin. Or you needed to hear it. You needed to hear it. Other reports of Parnia rolling in. Really?

Somebody said, I knew it'd be Parnia. The minute Caitlin started talking, she's great. But she'll tell it how it is. I need to go see Parnia. Just be like, give me a once over and hit me with it. You need to go see Parnia on a good day, though. Imagine if she hits you at one of your lobes. Yeah, true.

Okay. All right. Well, 0800DARL hit you at one of your lobes. Yeah, true. Okay. All right, well, 0800-DARLS-AT-M-9696. You can text or call now. When was somebody brutally honest with you? Maybe it was hard to hear. And we're going to also put you in touch with Parnia if you need a straight-up big doll. So we want to know when somebody was brutally honest with you,

whether or not it was like Caitlin and being told you've got a moustache. Although Caitlin did ask. So it wasn't out of nowhere. And she was doing her job. Exactly. She is your hair removal specialist. And I, like, really, like, my mum just used me

because she's really horrified that. She's like, you didn't have a moustache. Because I think she's like... Yeah, no, I'm using, yes, I did, mum, and it's your fault. But, like, when she thinks moustache, she thinks hope you say, yes, I did, mum, and it's your fault. But like when she thinks massage, she thinks my dad's like big, bushy. Yeah, she's not close enough

to like, you know, get a good geezer on it. Yeah, I don't let her kiss me on the mouth or anything. Doug is rocking an absolute... Oh, it's a great massage. Yeah, it is. Upper lip slug.

He's really got a great moustache. And parents, grandparents especially, are good at being brutally honest, aren't they? Because they don't care. Small children, grandparents,, are good at being brutally honest, aren't they? Because they don't care. Small children, grandparents, and Parnia.

And people just want Parnia's number for not even moustache-related incidents. They just need a straight-up opinion on things. And they think Parnia's delivering truth. Go and see her at Off and On. We all go there. It's great. We're pretty sure she's the one inheriting our butthole lasering. So this is going to be a real wake-up call. She's going to see everyone's bits and pieces apart from James.

She's not going to be able to listen to the show properly. If she were listening to it, she'd just see a bunch of talking buttholes and vaginas. Poor, poor, poor. Poor Parnia. We should give her some counselling. She's going to need it. Guys, you see any flowers or something? She'd probably tell us they were rubbish. Poor party We should give her some counselling She's gonna need it Guys you

send her flowers or something She'll probably tell us they were rubbish and they started to die when they got there So we want to know when you have been told

when you've been delivered brutal honesty Yeah A text message in somebody said a woman came up to her at a gala dinner and said

I've got to know because we're talking about it at our table Are you just fat or are you pregnant? How can someone say that to someone? Brutal, eh? And to come up and say, our table's been talking about it. You're going about your night and someone's, oh, that would ruin your year.

Yeah. Not just your night. But they didn't tell me whether or not, what one they were. So they might have just been pregnant. Samantha, when was somebody brutally honest with you? So my partner, like we moved to New Zealand not that long ago. And since we've moved, I've been eating all of the really good New Zealand food. And he kind of approached me like, um, babe, do you notice how much weight you've gained

since we moved to New Zealand? What? Where did you move here from? Well, I lived in Australia for six years. Right, right. Yeah. I would have thought Australia and New Zealand are very similar. Treats? Yeah, what treat is

to blame for the weight gain? Well, you just can't beat all the meat and the pies and all the yummies. All the yummies. We know, Samantha. We know. Yeah.

We didn't get six years of reprieve by living in Australia either. I've gone six years without it, so I'm like, come on, I've got to get it in now. Make it up for lost time. Ted, how long was he in the dog box for? A little while.

He very much apologised and was like, I wasn't trying to be offensive. I was just trying to make you aware. I said, yeah, well, my pants don't fit anymore. I think I know this. And he brought his way out of the dog box with a delicious block of Whitaker's chocolate.

Very true. He knows. Samantha, thanks for your call. Laura, when was somebody brutally honest with you? So I look after a 10-year-old and she was sitting on my lap and she looked at me and she was like, I just love your double chin. Oh, it's hard to be mad at them too when they say they love it. Because they love it, yeah.

Because they love it and she was just, and she loves me to pieces and she kind of just like stroked my chin and she goes, it's just so cute. Oh, and you were like thank you for ruining my day. Thank you. So how condescending from a 10 year old. It's cute. You're cute. So honest condescending from a 10-year-old. It's cute.

You're cute. Slap, slap. Very true. Laura, thanks for your call. Some more text messages. Our office admin lady told me, with a gentle shoulder touch, that it was a shame I didn't get braces as a child to sort out my two front teeth. What is she thinking?

How can you say that? You're gorgeous, Sharon, and it's just a shame that you didn't get braces when you were a kid to sort out those gangly gnashes at the front. But the gentle touch on the shoulder made it okay. The gentle touch and the calm delivery. I was getting my eyebrows threaded, and the lady said, lip too,

and I was totally blindsided and said in a high-pitched shock voice, no! And then she replied, oh, but it will be so pretty. Now I have to deal with the fact that I have a moment I'm not pretty. You go see Panya. She'll sort you out. She'll tell you.

Yeah. I'm going to ask Panya if I've got a moustache. One time when we were having a conversation about why I was single, my bestie told me it's because of my

vibrant personality and men often prefer a more timid woman. What? No. Wow. I'm not listening to that BS. Wow.

I was driving my boyfriend off and before he got out of the car he said, oh, you've got an eyelash on your upper lip and he reached across and wiped it and then wiped it again

and then like pulled it and tugged it and said, oh, never mind. It's connected. Not an eyelash. I love these like, white, white,

just can't get it off. Tug, tug, tug and her whole face would have been like, bleh, bleh, bleh, ble can't get it off. Tug, tug, tug, and her whole face would have been like... It's like Caitlin's chin, chin hair. Can we not go on about my chin hair, please? It's very coarse. We'll give you a couple of zaps on the chin, too.

Sort that out. It's like when someone goes, oh, there's something on your face, and flicks it, flick, and then you realise it's a pimple. You're like, no, that's actually stuck there. I saw my cousin after eight years of not seeing him. He went to give me a hug, and he was like, oh, hands don't touch anymore. Wow.

Haven't spoken to him since. Yeah. Probably didn't need to be told that. Nah, you know these things. You know. One time everybody was making jokes. Oh, this is brutal. One time everyone was making jokes. Oh, this is brutal. One time everyone was making jokes about people's mums, as you do.

Got to dad's and my partner said, we could tell a joke about your dad, but you don't have one. And everyone was like, silence. Wow. Dropped over there. I was 36 weeks pregnant and a stranger felt the need to come up to me and say, Jesus, you've got a real waddle on don't you Thank you

And we're hearing from all the primary school teachers And intermediate teachers And to a certain extent college teachers Who said you don't know honesty Until you have to deal with kids all day Yeah They will just tell you Ruthless eh

Everything At quite a volume So all the other kids hear it as well So there you go. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about breast implants and cremation. What do they do with them when you're being cremated?

Does it not burn well? Do they have to get rid of them first? Or are they like little bombs? Or yeah, when they're burning it's like boom, there goes one boob,

boom, there goes the other boob. Yeah, like when you put something in the, not that I'd burn plastic, but like a plastic bottle for example, in a fire might go

boom, boom. Yeah, like when I burn there'll be screws and stuff left over. I know, then they can recycle those. Oh, that's good. Yeah. I don't know if I'd want your screws. Replacement bits, you can put a

got a little wipe, send it back to the hospital for the next person. Yeah. So, you're actually right, all of you. Both of you, everything you said was pretty much right. I'm not surprised. We're quite knowledgeable. It's recommended that breast

implants are removed prior to cremation as breast implants don't melt inside the crematorium. So you think how hot it gets and for how long crematoriums are going for and they do not melt. Like they can incinerate human bones. Yeah.

And if we know anything from how to, what's that, Making a Murderer season two, you need a hot fire for that. You do. Yeah. So they explode in the body. They boof. Because it heats up and it expands,

so the casing breaks and it explodes. And it leaves behind a sticky residue that doesn't burn throughout the entire process, but can get in with the ashes and make them more like... Oh, so you've got this kind of mess of... But then what? Okay, you know those people that are like, I'm just going to Thailand. It was just a holiday.

And then you're like, well, Karen, why are your boobs bigger? She's like, no reason. It's just a holiday. Right. How would they just have to be like, what if the family didn't know? This would fall under the paragraph heading, what if you don't know your loved one had breast implants?

If you don't know whether or not they had one, don't worry about it. First off, both the doctor signing off the death and the coroner would, you know, they'd know. They'd know. Unfortunately, though, they still do slip through. The body can be cremated without anyone realising they're still in there.

And it just means that afterwards the crematorium, the chamber will need cleaning. Oh, my God. And then you get Karen's ashes and you're like, why are they all tacky? They're a bit like sticky. Karen's ashes are sticking together. Sticky stuffy. And somebody said, okay, so getting them removed,

we know somebody's got them. Yeah. But can they be left in for the open casket viewing? Which is a weird question, right? You're like, I love you, Nana. Go well into the afterlife. Say hi to granddad. Sweet tits.

Are there any nanas? Would there be nanas now? Would there be nannas now? There will be. There will be. There will be. There will be. I can guarantee so many listening right now their nanna has fake boobs. Wow.

And not because, elective, elective. Not because maybe she had a mastectomy. Is that where the breast gets removed? And then, you know, cosmetically it's the balancer, which I totally understand. I don't care if you've got fake boobs for whatever reason, but there would definitely be nannies. Someone listening right now has a nanna in their life.

Yep. With breast implants. So I'm just saying they leave them in for that. You wouldn't see that in an open casket, would you? But now she's paid for them. She'll want a cleavy number. She'll want a cleavy number to be bet to be, you know, for a final viewing.

Okay, good call. Look down. You shouldn't have looked. Okay, good call. Look down. It shouldn't have looked. Sorry, you're my nana. You know, you did use the money that granddad left you when he passed to do it. So granddad's passed and then she got them. I know. She's on the market again after 40 years.

Yeah, you've got to revamp the old villa. Polish the hardwood floors. No, I didn't mean that at all. No, not at all. Anyway. So today's fact of the day is if you are cremated with your breast implants in, the silicon, the

saline stuff in it does not burn and it'll need to be scooped up afterwards. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. So August started school in June. She's five and she's all about like learning and stuff, which is good because I thought she was going to be about lunch

and causing trouble. Oh, she's still about lunch. About learning and lunch. Yeah. She's still about lunch. She loves a lunch. Hey, she's a Smith and we are big fans of eating. Yeah.

So, we were reading her book the other day and it got to the end. There was like a pause part and day and it got to the end. There was like a pause part and I said, got to the end of it. I was like, dot, dot, dot, because that's how you do it, right? If you're trying to create suspense, you do the dot, dot, dot. Yeah. She's like, it's called an ellipse. An ellipse.

And I was like, yeah, ellipses. See, I didn't even say it right. I said it wrong. Ellipses. And I was like, how did you know that? She's like, Mrs. Vogel told me. Mrs. Vogel told me. And I was like, well, I am very impressed that you were told that

and you remembered it. She knows what a dot, dot, dot is. Yeah, yeah. And I'm very impressed. And then she's like, do you know what a digraph is? And I was like, oh, bless. She's trying to say diagram. I was like, do you mean diagram?

She's like, no. I mean digraph. Digraph. Digraph. And I was like, are you saying that right? She's like, you five-year-old, do you know what you're saying? Are you saying that right? Digraph.

And she's like, yes, digraph. And I was like. D-I-graph. D-I-graph. Clearly we don't know what that is that's what I did that's what I did

so I pulled out my phone does anyone in the producers booth know what a digraph is so this isn't just something that's not

I'm into the education system after a week and you guys James you don't know GoDaddy doesn't know never heard of it never heard of it okay great

so I like Diagraph I pull out my phone And I open up Search engine I'm like Google And I'm like

Diagraph Enter And a diagraph Is Two letters That make one sound And it's legit Like ph

Like ph Ph That's an example Of a diagraph The consonant diagraphs Ch Like chair and church. Yep.

G, like ghost. Yep. As GH. Yep. F, sh. Why do we need to know that? F, like mouth, teeth. I mean, we know what those sounds are and we're taught, aren't we?

But we don't, I don't think we were ever obviously taught what that is called. I was never given a name as far as I know. Huh. Yeah. And so now what? Did you have to go back to her and say yes? When I was lying on bed right beside her while I Googled it, I was like, huh.

She's like, see? I was like, yes. Now the light's off and you go to bed. No more reading. No, I was like, you've taught me something. So now she's on the EverQuest. Anytime she hears anything, she'll come and be like, did you know? And tell me.

Do you just give it to her? There's been, there was one other like animal fact she hit me with that I hadn't heard before. I forget it now. Okay. It was about like an obscure animal. She's like, did you know? And told me and I was like, I didn't know that. She's like, She is so a mini version of you.

Her head is full of useless facts. Yeah, yeah. She's going to have all this stuff rattling around in there. Yeah, but a diagraph. Well, now we know. We've all learnt. Now we know. We've all learnt something, haven't we? Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM.

The police have been sent to, they were sent to guard a Scottish Ikea. The reason being is that there was an online event established to say that there was going to be a massive game of hide and seek at Ikea in Glasgow. I knew it. That sounds so fun. So they were sent to guard it because they were saying

this was going to be Glasgow's biggest game of hide and seek and it was going to start at 3pm so you could arrive and hide and then the person who was finding people would arrive at a certain time and begin finding everybody. So that sounds like an insane amount of fun, right? Yeah. But no, not to IKEA and not to the local Glaswegian police. So they sent in people to guard the store

to stop youth en masse going into IKEA. I love when these Facebook events get out of hand, like the Area 51 thing. Yeah, nothing ever came of that, did it? No, because they said people get shot. Yeah, they said we'll shoot you. But when, that's still coming, isn't it? Because last week there was a story about the neighbouring county

had to issue another music. Was it TBC, was it? I think it was. Yeah, it was TBC. The Lime event in Hamilton that was for Friday that went a bit too far as well. That was the one where people would shred across the heart of the bridge in Hamilton on limes.

And the organiser had to put up a thing saying... What, the Humpey Bridge? Were they going to go over the humps? Well, just across the bridge. I don't know. It's just one of those funny... Go across the bridge, that would be okay. But if it was that Humpey one,

that's a very dangerous bridge to lime across because you'd run out of guts going up the other side. 1,400 people said they were planning to go or interested. Were they? So police kind of got a bit upset about that. They said no. But Ikea's would be great to play hide and seek. They would be, wouldn't they?

If you've ever been in one overseas in like an Aussie, they're humongous. Yeah. I can't wait for that to come here. Like a Mitre 10 Mega would be a great place for you to hide and seek. Dane, like you could hide in bins. You could be in the compost bin. You could be inside a garden shed in the garden apartment. Don't encourage that.

Maybe use a park. Okay. Okay, fun police. Woo! Okay, great. Hide behind the tree. But no, maybe if you could get them on board. No, see, I'm just thinking they've got occupational safety

and health because I was there and I said to the guy I was after some piping and he said oh it's up there but I'll need to go get a ladder

because I'm not allowed and I just reached up and I grabbed it and I was like am I allowed to do that and he's like well you just did it without asking

so I think that's okay well you've got to use like safety yeah yeah and fair enough because stuff's dangerous why did you need piping wouldn't you like, safety. Yeah, yeah. And fair enough, because stuff's dangerous. Why did you need piping? Wouldn't you like to know?

I was building a bong. Obviously, obviously I wasn't. No, seriously, why did you need piping? Well, I'm piping in a new outside garden tat. I mean, you asked. Don't look at me like you're bored already. Don't look at me like you're bored.. Don't look at me like you're bored, you frigging ass. I'm tapping out.