ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - September 03 2019

Episode Date: September 2, 2019

Community Notices, Vaughan's girls used the landline for the first time and what did you have to do on your first day of work?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music lives here. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. We didn't have police sniffer dogs at school. We did. Really? They bought one in once. Morin's valet. But I think it was just a policeman with an Alsatian, not a trained one.

I think it was just to scare people. Oh, really? They said, no, this is how they told us. We were in assembly. Yeah. And, because we had to always leave our bags

outside assembly. Yeah. But not in a classroom because it was a transition between classrooms. And the assembly started and then this police person

walked past with a dog and they pointed to it. Yeah. I can't remember if it was the principal or the deputy principal and said said this dog that you can see

walking past the window is going to be doing bag checks while we're all in assembly and everyone was like but I don't think they found anything apart from some sandwiches

yeah you're probably right that was the clue when it wasn't a police dog it was just absolutely knocking into someone's sandwiches they couldn't do it at Nelson

because there'd be no kids left at school. The dog would walk in and be like, all of them. Yeah. The lot. And if it's not them, it's their parents. Yeah.

Using them as mules. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. Story time, three news headlines. Vaughan and Megan, you've got to pick one of the following three headlines. The others are deleted. We don't find out about those. Headline one, Starbucks customer upset with name on cup.

Headline two, God works in mysterious ways. And headline three, woman Uber Eats. God works in mysterious ways. He does indeed. I know the Starbucks cup one. Do you know that one, Vaughn? No, I don't know that one. The Starbucks employee

wrote ISIS on the cup to describe the customer. No. Did you read that story? That's another one. Yeah, they wrote ISIS. ISIS? Yeah, the Starbucks PR department certainly had their work cut out for them? That's another one. Yeah, they were ISIS. ISIS. Yeah, the Starbucks PR department certainly had their work cut out for them. It's another one. Another one.

It's not the ISIS cup. It all started out as a bit of a hoot when they'd spell your name wrong so you'd put the picture online. Yeah. You know, make everybody else Jones for the Starbucks. Yeah.

But now that it's dancing into quite dangerous territories like ISIS, not as much fun, is it? No. But no, it's dancing into quite dangerous territories like ISIS, not as much fun, is it? No. But no, it's not that one. What about Uber Eats? That was story number three, right? God Works in Mysterious Ways was number two, right?

Yeah. I don't know. What do you want? I'm stuck. God Works in mysterious ways. Wait, Google Uber Eats. What was the headline? Woman Uber Eats.

Woman Uber Eats. You're not allowed to Google, Megan. That's part of the excitement of story time. Well, that's pretty vague. I doubtful I will. I reckon Uber Eats. Oh! No, I know what it is. Megan, this is why you're not allowed to Google.

I just literally was about to click on that link. A woman bites her Uber driver. What's she do that for? She's upset. What was she? So she's. Oh, man, it actually looks real painful. That's not pleasant. No, it's not a pleasant story. Certainly not. All right, well, you actually looks real painful. That's not pleasant.

No, it's not a pleasant story. Certainly not. All right, well, you've done that. Yeah. You really ruined this game. I'm sulking now. Ruined slash, like, got through all of them now, pretty much. Well, no, you don't know the Starbucks one,

and you don't know God works in mysterious ways. Well, I want God works in mysterious ways. Yeah, I'll go with that. Okay. Just loading. Just loading. We go now to the Vatican. So it's a country in a country, isn't it?

Yes, it is. The Vatican City? Yeah. And the Pope has apologised. It's a Russian country, really, the way it goes inside a country, inside a country, inside another country. The Pope has apologised for arriving late for his weekly prayer in St Peter's

Square because he was stuck in the lift in the Vatican for 25 minutes before a power outage, during a power outage, had to be freed by firefighters. Right. This is the Pope. The papal lift. The Pope got stuck

in a lift. Ever been stuck in a lift? No I don't think so That would be my worst nightmare It was my own doing though Because they kept saying Don't try to open the door While it's going down Oh my god

Didn't you do that with me in a lift? You just put Yeah you shouldn't And people that jump in lifts I go absolutely septic So I've been in a lift and someone started jumping. Drunk and off. It was a bar.

So obviously, you know, there were drinks involved. And then started jumping and the lift stopped. Because I have reoccurring nightmares about lifts. Yeah, that makes your life spiralling out of control. Yeah. When you're free falling in a lift. And you're naked and all my teeth are falling out Yeah

Do you think the Pope When he was in the lift He probably sat down Because you sit down When you're stuck in a lift Do you think that he saw The thing that says Schindler's lifts

And he's like What the movie Maybe How long am I going to be here It doesn't say What kind of movie it was What kind of lift it was Because there were the other ones

Otis Yep That's it Otis? Yep. That's it. Otis and Schindler. They've got the corner market. Yeah, yeah. There's another kind. There's another lift company.

The Otis, Schindler's, and it's got that round circle with the triangle. Or is that Otis? That might be. That's, I mean, a round circle is an O. Well, this is thrilling.

I think I know story number one. Excuse me, lift chat. No. A ship came into a harbour carrying brands of lifts. You might need to know this. Otis. See, now you're out. Now you're third and you didn't listen to the final one,

so you can't pass. Thresher and Krupp. No. You've all seen it. You've all seen it. T-H-Y-S-S-E-N, Krupp. Thresheren Krupp. No. You've all seen it. You've all seen it. T-H-Y-S-S-E-N Krupp. Thressen Krupp. I don't think I've seen it.

No, I don't think I've seen it. You 100%. They do like ski lifts and stuff too. Oh, do they do a chairlift? Yeah, they do chairlifts. Oh, they do all kinds of lifts, mate. I've definitely seen them. They just specialise in people getting up people up.

Cone. You would have seen a Coney. Cone. I've seen a Coney. Cone, I've seen a Coney. K-O-N-E. Coney 2012. Oh, Coney, yeah. Yeah.

K-O-N-E. Yeah. Yeah, that's kind of all the big ones I've seen. But there's a lot in the old Google. Because when we got stuck on the lift and called the number, it went through to Sydney. And they had to ring the local contractor to come and get us. Clemen.

Have you seen a Clemen lift? Yes. Yeah. I don't know if I have. Okay, well, you're well equipped for a ship came into a harbour, if you're playing that this weekend. I would even, if I were you, pocket those and start the round. You call the shots and say,

ship coming to the harbour carrying international lifts manufacturers. You're winning that round, although your friends might think you're a bit weird Maybe I think about death a lot I don't know I don't think at the level of a morbid fascination Right Why do you think about it a lot? Well it's the end for all of us isn't it?

It's the one thing we've all got in common I was thinking about that as I was driving home yesterday Like when you die What happens to everything I think about? Do you know what I mean? Your energies just cease to exist. I know, but do I just see black? Yeah.

Well, my personal thoughts are that you just stop. You're asking to be sent some pamphlets about the Lord. But it's like your conscience. You've got Jehovah's Witnesses knocking at your door. Your conscience. Like, what are you? You just stop, don't you? It's just a construct.

You just stop and fade to black and that's it. That's why you've got to enjoy your time here. But I can't imagine just like seeing black forever. But you don't. You don't. You don't see anything. You just, that's it. You're out.

But then what happens to me? You just, you're gone, mate. That's so weird. You're just done. Make the most of every day. That's why you've got to make the most of every day. YOLO. Yeah, exactly. You gone. Mate, you're just done. It's so weird. Make the most of every day. That's why you've got to make the most of every day. YOLO. Yeah, exactly. You only do live, well, that depends.

I mean, don't tick up too much on the credit card. You've still got to pay that off while you're living. Someone's going to have to, and your husband's much younger than you, and you'll be dead and he'll have 40 years to pay it off. So, and one of the things about dying is if you die overseas or you know, you're living in a country which isn't your homeland.

And when you die, your family want to take you home or you want to leave New Zealand. I thought, well, how do you do it? Obviously, cremation would be a lot easier. You're a smaller box. This is true. Yeah. And just interestingly enough, stumbled across this story. I wasn't thinking about it at the time,

but these are the things that I just think about in the back of my head every now and then. So then I read the story. I found it fascinating that over the past three years, the remains of almost 2,000 people were brought into New Zealand. Okay. Yeah. So since 2016, about 500 corpses and urns or ashes containers have been imported into the country. And about 250 leave New Zealand every year.

Right. Yeah. Because do you have to, if you cremate Granny and then fly her wherever, would you just chuck that in the suitcase? You'd have to declare it. I'd probably take Granny carry on. Nah, but this is going to be more admin. And then you don't want Granny getting lost. Well, no, if they were chucking the bag around and the lid came off.

Well, you'd obviously seal the lid. Brand three, your undies. Yeah, what's better? Do you go for like a breakable like urn thing that could smash? Or do you go for like a plastic bottle? Just go for a systema. I'd probably just go for a nice steel number. But then that'll pop or like blow up.

You know how they blow up with the pressure? Yeah, true. You want like a metal, like a cocktail shaker. So do these figures say how much it costs? $65, that's domestically. So if you were in New Zealand and you wanted to get grants earned back to Christchurch from Auckland, $65.

Caskets are obviously more expensive, $1,000. Internationally, getting a body back from the United States can cost more than $10,000 depending on its size. So you'd be better to cremate it and then bring the ashes back. 100%. But then some people don't want to be cremated. But then you can get a business class seat one way cheaper than that. I would demand a business class seat. What, the urn gets a business class seat? No cheaper than that. I would demand a business class seat.

What, the urn gets a business class seat? No, if you bring in the body back. The body gets a business class seat. It's cheaper. Sit it up. Weekend at Bernie's it. Yeah. Weekend at Bernie's it.

Just put some sunnies on and be like. Pay $10,000 to go in the hole. Please don't disturb my friend. He's dead tired. Which is an actual line off an Arnie movie. So, and with New Zealand, we've got kind of a country of immigrants, really. And some of the more recent immigrants to New Zealand, a lot from the Pacific Islands, the family's still in the Pacific Islands and have a family burial point.

It's quite important to be returned from where you came. So to do that sort of international out of New Zealand, the body has to be embalmed and the coffin has to be fully sealed up to stop what is called, in speech marks, leakage. Which is fair enough. Yeah. You know, when we get the suitcases out and there's a dribble of Grandad out the bottom of the...

A miscellaneous dribble. That'll always happen with my soap container if I take my... Because, you know, I love to travel with my soap. Yes. My liquid body wash. It's happened to me with sunscreen before. Yeah, always have a little dribs out the side. So, yeah.

Wow. If you're wondering where the most expensive place to get a dead body back to in the world at the moment, it's North Africa. Oh, okay. Expensive place to get a dead body back to in the world at the moment is North Africa. Oh, okay. The North African countries, just due to not too many airlines flying there at the moment. Yeah. And obviously, the area being a premium.

Right, okay. To get them in there. But you've got to declare the ashes and everything. You do. You can't just have them in the suitcase. No, you've got to declare them. Huh. I still suck on the miscellaneous dribble of grandeur. From the ZM Think Tank, this is The Top Six.

Later this month. Good morning. Later this month, Shortland Street will be opening its doors to the public. This is your chance to have a look behind the scenes at South Pacific Pictures in West Auckland. And so we've been, what, three or four times? Yeah. And every time, it's pretty cool. You're like, hee, hee, hee.

Yeah, and you get to, and it's like the walls stop and there's like another huge ceiling space. Because they're all sets. Yeah, and they're all lit, so they've got to have lighting up there that can, you know, duplicate different times of day. Right beside Chris Warner's kitchen is, like, the bar. But does it ruin it if you're a massive fan?

I don't know. Because I can't look at the reception now at Shorland Street on the TV without, like, I picture it on my head. Where it is on there. Other side of that's not real. Yeah. And then the outside part is literally the entrance to the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, maybe literally the entrance to the whole thing. Yeah.

So, I mean, maybe it would, but, I mean, if you're a huge fan, you're still going to love it, aren't you? Yeah. September 28th, Saturday, September 28th, from 10am to 4pm at South Pacific Pictures. Some of the cast will also be in attendance. Oh, okay. And they haven't exactly confirmed who that would be.

Set tours will take approximately 15 minutes. You'll check out ED, triage, TK's apartment, and take a peek inside the King's house and scope out the IV bar. So by the sounds of it... 15 minutes, that's pretty quick. They'll have it set up and you'll just be walking through. But to be honest, don't linger too long. As you say, you spoil the magic for yourself.

Yeah, that's true. So on this tour, I have put together the top six things you're likely to see. Okay. On the Shortland Street behind the scenes tour. Number six, Lionel Skegan's muffin trolley. Oh, the famous muffin trolley. R.I.P. A lot of people won't know Lionel.

No. Well, no, these are some real retro Shortland Street moments that I'm going to be pointing out today, but they kept them because of the moment in history. He was washed out to sea wasn't he? Yes, on his wedding day when he was supposed to marry Mackenzie

I believe. That's right. That was some absolute champagne Shortland Street. He's with, is it Pippa's husband from Home and Away

who's also washed out to sea? Michael was washed out in a flood in Summer Bay. Yeah, so I like to think that Michael and Lionel are on an island with Tom Hanks and that volleyball.

Wilson. Going through DHL packages. Yep. In my head, that's how that ended. Yeah. Number five on the list of the top six things you'll see behind the scenes at Shortland Street are the DNA tests that confirmed,

not that you're 100% that bitch, the DNA tests that confirmed Rangi and Donna were siblings when they'd just been hooking up. You might remember this famous Shortland Street storyline.

They were hooking up quite a lot and then someone's like your brother and sister and they were like this is disgusting. Do you think they got to work and read

their scripts and they're like oh come on we're to go out in public in New Zealand. Yeah. It's already bad enough

they drive past you and they just yell out, Shortland Street! Now it's going to be, Incest! Shortland Street! Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six things you'll see behind the scenes

on your Shortland Street tour, a photo of how many male members of staff and crew turned up for the scene with the first lesbian kiss ever to be on New Zealand television. All of them. Yeah. They were all like, Oh, am I not on? Am I not rostered on today?

I just, oh, I'm here now. I'm like, what are you guys filming? Oh, really? Is that today? I didn't, I'll just be over here.

Do you need me to be an extra or do you want to point a light on? I'll just stand over here and watch. That is actually one of the cool things about the set is all the photos on the wall. The cast photos.

Every year there's a cast photo. You walk down, you're like, Oh my God. Yeah. I forgot about him. Like troubled teenager in the 1990s. Lulu. Who?

You probably won't remember until you see the photo of her and you'll be like, Oh my God. I don't remember Lulu. No. Do you not remember Lulu? Nah. Oh, she was troubled.

I remember Fergus. She was friends with Minnie. Remember Fergus? They were the same vibe. Were they? They were the same Minnie, Fergus and Lulu. Oh, okay. And then Nick, kind of.

Nick maybe was a little bit older than them, but they were up to no good. Right, okay. Number three on the list of the top six things you'll see on the behind the scenes tour of Shawna Street, the dent in the car park that the Ferndale Strangler left when he jumped off the hospital roof in 2008. Remember that is like that gigs up.

Oof, donk, into the car park. The dent's still there. Number two on the list of the top six things you'll see behind the scenes at Shortland Street, a post-it note reminder for Tim Uriah Morrison from the 1990s telling him he's not in Guatemala anymore. Because apparently he just keeps forgetting, Dr. Ropata telling him he's not in Guatemala anymore. Because apparently he just keeps forgetting Dr. Ropata that you're not in Guatemala.

And number one on the list of the top six things you'll see behind the scenes at Shortland Street, the photo on the iPad of Harry Warner's penis that caused Chris Warner to utter the famous words, please tell me that is not your penis. They've got the actual photo. That'll be there at the open day. Of the penis, yeah.

That's 100%. What's going to happen? That is today's top six. There's been a study done, and if you want to feel happier and more fulfilled in life, you need to get out of your liberal bubble or your bubble, your Facebook bubble, your Google bubble, your friendship bubble, your comfort zone, and you need to meet people that you might normally disagree with.

Does that mean, like, I've seen enough of those on, like, stuff comments. Yeah, so there's an author, Rebel Ideas, The Power of Diverse Thinking. He has said that echo chambers and these bubbles that we're all in with people that we all agree with, viewing online opinions that we agree with, limit our opportunities and constrain our lives. And he uses Facebook as an example of people that gravitate towards like-minded individuals.

So we don't want anything to do with people. Oh, 100%. And you just, someone's telling you the same thing back. So you're like, I must be right. And then somebody else says you are. And then, yeah, I must be right. And then somebody else says you are. And then. Yeah. Yeah.

It must be frustrating. I mean, it doesn't happen to me because I'm right. But I do see these ill-informed morons. Yeah. But then if you go and hang out with people who you disagree with and then you get talking about politics or something, it never ends well. Arguing is exhausting. No.

But do you think you feel better because you feel more smug and more right? No, I just get frustrated. I'm getting that feeling out of it as well. Yeah. Well, but apparently, yeah, it's just a way to become more fulfilled and not only that, more creative. See, I think disagreeing on little things, that's... Yeah, maybe they're talking about little things.

That's fine. Like disagreeing on where that chair should go. Right. So you talk about different options for the chair, but no one's going to die. But you talk to somebody who's ignorant to things. It's just going to upset you. And yeah, it will upset you greatly.

Well, the author of this book suggests a Facebook detox and probably with that an Instagram detox because then you're not seeing the things you constantly see. Yeah. I think rather than hanging out with people

you disagree with, it would be better to travel and see different cultures and the way people do things. Yeah. That's more fun. But then you'd still be on Facebook and Instagram,

wouldn't you? Yeah, putting up the pictures so that everyone in my little bubble can agree that that's a good picture. You always run back to the bubble for validation. You don't put up a photo of you crying in a toilet after you've had an argument with someone while you're travelling. You put up the photo before that of you drinking an espresso martini and being like, oh my God, I'm in my life, meeting some great people.

That sort of thing. Come on, have you ever been on Instagram? ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. New restrictions are in place at countdown supermarkets, 180 stores across the country, an age restriction on energy drinks. You'll need to be 16 years or older now to buy energy drinks.

That's the general vibe is that under 16 shouldn't be drinking something with so much caffeine and so much sugar. But if you are under 16, you just go to a dairy service station. Well, yeah, that's the... Another supermarket. That's the vibe, I suppose. It's good that Countdown's taken a bit of responsibility.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they built a gate, but they haven't built a wall around it yet, which is all the other places that sell energy drinks to stop selling them to under 16-year-olds. And it's kind of generally agreed across the board by medical professionals that it's probably the best idea. Well, yeah, because I don't – if I do have one, I'll have a sugar-free Red Bull.

But, God, even that just gets me all jittery because I never touch them. So when I do, I'm always just like, I'm awake, I'm awake. I don't know what that does if you have those every day. Yeah. And there's a bit of,

I mean, maybe people don't know that you shouldn't be having them when you, you know, when you're young or buying them for your kids but there might be a bit

of that ignorance there because I'm a shard AS, my wife used to be a, work for Red Bull. Oh yeah. Yeah, locked be a bit of that ignorance there because I'm a shard AS. My wife used to be a work for Red Bull. Oh yeah. Yeah. Locked in a Red Bull girl to her about.

Don't want to go on about it. Don't want to go on about it but Red Bull girl. She drove the Mini and everything. Always brought Red Bulls home. Probably why I got to 103 kgs.

She was a Red Bull girl and you were 103 kgs. Wow. I was like, you got one of those energy drinks for me. So, Yeah, book girl, and you were 103 pages. Wow. I was like, yeah, what are those? I mean, did you drink to me? So people used to come up and say, oh, can I have one? Because they'd hand out the freebies.

Yeah. And she'd say, yeah, sure. And they'd be like, can I grab a couple for my kids? And point at like four and five-year-olds. And they'd be like, no, no, yeah. Definitely can't. That's not our. People get really angry at them for not giving them...

A Red Bull for their four-year-old. Maybe they didn't want to give them to the four-year-old. They wanted to take them home for later to have some. But they had to open them for them there and then so they couldn't stockpile them. Okay. But yeah, people would always ask if their kids could have them. And their kids were like, young, young kids. Not like teenagers, younger than that.

Like four or five-year-olds. Oh no, these drinks are, you know, not designed for kids. Oh, do you want to get them to sleep for two days? Got caffeine in them. I know. It'll be lighting fires and all sorts of things. Is that equivalent to a coffee? Or is it more than a coffee?

Because you wouldn't rock up to a cafe and give your five-year-old a latte. Can I have a fluffy? That's actually for me. My kid's going to have a long black. Double shot. Double shot, yeah. Triple, triple, quad strength,

quad strength long black for this five-year-old. So, kindy to have a long black. Double shot. Double shot, yeah. Triple quad strength, quad strength long black for this five-year-old. So, kindy to get through. Yeah. Big day of Fido and macaroni cards. Look at him. He buggered. Hardly set the wink last night.

Probably because he had a coffee too late in the day. I told him not to. He was pounding that Nespresso at 8.30. Ye boi. Fleshforn and Megan. The podcast.

ZM. A father is a little bit angry after something happened on a plane. And actually, I often think about this. Because I kind of agree with him. So, it was a recent flight from Auckland to China. Dad, Philip. To where? Jaina.

Jaina. Auckland to Jaina. Philip was on the plane with his four-year-old. Yeah. And obviously, there's like, what do they call them? The GUIs. The screens. Yeah.

And everyone's watching movies. The graphic user interface. Is that what the GUI stands for? Graphic user interface. Just in-flight entertainment. Yeah, the TV. I just like everyone to know that I know that it's called a GUI. You know what it's called. Yeah.

Okay. So everyone was watching their chosen movies. And sometimes you get a little thingy at the start, a little advisory message. Well, yeah, and it's always like this movie's been modified to fit the screen and if you're on a Middle Eastern airline like Qatar or Emirates, they'll cut out any kind of hot, steamy sex or gratuitous violence. Just ruin the movie.

Their mouth is saying one thing, but the audibly are saying fudge. Yeah, exactly. That happens. And they edit out plane crashes too in movies. Which is good on a plane for nervous flyers. So yeah, sometimes they give a little message to please be aware.

This is like R16. Please be aware of people around you, but you still watch it. Yeah. And this father. That's on a planet. Even if you've downloaded something off Netflix and you're watching it.

I know, and a sex scene comes on. You kind of like punch over your screen. You're like. Just use that plus 10 button. 10, 10, 10. Because I want to watch this, but I don't want people to see me watching this. Hurry up.

I know, because you're always saying like, what if someone just glances over at that exact moment and they think you're watching an adult movie or something on a plane. But it's better when it's on your, like, iPad, because you can hide it. But when it's on the screen in front of you and there's a sexy scene, you're like, um. I love walking back from the toilet on a plane

and seeing what everybody's watching. I know, especially when you see, like, big macho men watching rom-coms. You're like, ah. Interesting. So, Philip is angry. Ah, interesting. So, Philip is angry. This is the dad because his four-year-old was able to see a violent movie on someone else's screen. Well, that's his fault for putting his kid there, isn't it?

Well, he didn't put his kid there. Well, move his kid. Swap seats with his kid. Or just tell the kid not to watch it. Yeah, that falls on Philip, I think, to say don't watch that or block it somehow. Kids shouldn't be on planes. Yeah, but it's not watching it, but he's able to see the screen around him and it's got violence on it. Well, what would you do with Indy in August? Just tell them not to look.

Yeah, but as soon as you say don't look, won't they want to look even more? No, I'd say if you look, the pilot's going to come back here and throw you out the emergency exit. Yeah. It's not for kids. That would work for me. I'd be like, I don't want to be thrown out the emergency exit. I'd be like, don't cry. You should show them an episode of Air Crash Investigation

where the air hostess gets sucked out of the plane. Yes, and say she watched the movie. Watched other people's screens. And in 10 years when she's in therapy, like where does this irrational fear of flying come from? Well, there's lots of reasons. One of them being, One of them being... Air crash investigation.

Yeah. It's a great show. It's made us all safer as we learn from the crashes. And all those people because they were watching each other's screens. And my father told me

that the pilot was going to throw me out the door if I cried on a plane. Yeah. I'm sure we were all told these things and we've turned out just fine. Yeah, not at all.

We're emotionally stunted. Fletchborn and Megan's Community Notices. Hello and welcome to Community Notices, a segment of the show where we have a look at what's happening around New Zealand according to local Facebook pages. These are your community pages, your buy, sell, swap pages. And let's pop down to Hamilton Community Notice Board

first off, where Bex has posted with an animated background. You know how you can, if you're posting a status on Facebook and it's short, you can have a jazzy background. She's chosen a jazzy background with eyes, a range of eyes, and a couple of noses. If anyone is missing an unusual pet that was found at Crawshaw School, I have it.

You'll need to describe it and maybe have photos of it to claim it. Oh yeah, because someone might claim it. Yeah. It's not theirs.

Yeah. So now people are like, you're effectively holding someone's pet hostage. Oh yeah, true. And so they would come forward saying, I'm missing a rooster.

What's an unusual pet? Ferret. Not a cat, not a dog. Ferret. Don't even return it. They're a pest. Put it down. What else would fit under the pet category?

Like a coony coony? Maybe. Maybe a cute little, a minutiae pony. If you lost your minutiae pony, you need a little bit of a reprimand. That's like losing a large dog, losing a minutiae pony. So I don't know if that's beenand. That's like losing a large dog losing a minute's year pony. So I don't know

if that's been returned to owner or even if they uncovered what pet it was. If anybody's on the Hamilton Community Notice Board

and can text us in and let us know we'd just really like to know what unusual pet was there. Bex's profile picture is an alien.

Okay. No judge but I just think that's an important aspect of the story. She's worried about 5G cells coming.

Very. Sell towers. Next up, Rollison Buy, Sell and Exchange. 2016 page is doing well. It's into its third year now. All good. Yeah. For sale, says Susanna, a new MPG scooter.

Now, this is a scooter, a zip line scooter, whatever you'll call it. Two small wheels, one at the front, one at the back. Not motorised. Not motorised, no. Push scooter. Great scooter, she said. Being sold as my son requires money for using my credit card online without my consent. It's only been used for two days, so it's in near new condition.

Wow. She's like, nope, you're not getting this. What did he do? Unless he bought the scooter. Or do you think she's selling off the scooter? Very good. I don't know. I don't know if he bought the scooter using her credit card or he used her credit card. So now she's like,

I'm selling your scooter to get the money back. How old's the son? I feel like it's in at purchases. Old enough to know better. Yeah, maybe a fortnight, maybe a couple of skins. Yeah. $120. That's expensive, isn't it? Yeah. For a scooter? Especially after it's been years for two days by a criminal. Next up on the Rolliston community page, this got Rolliston buzzing. I got sent this about 15 times, mostly because it was grim, and I hope to God it's a joke. But Joel put up on the Rolliston community page, nothing like a beautiful sunny day in Raleigh.

Cheerios for lunch for the kids. Hashtag Raleigh summer days. But check out how he's cooking the Cheerios. In a rank old jug. Oh, in a jug. Yuck. So he's put them in the jug and the lid's broken off. So you know how when you lift up the lid, the jug stops boiling.

It doesn't know when to stop boiling because it's got that push down. So it'll just keep boiling to cook the Cheerios. And that jug used to be white. That's a manky ass jug. It actually looks like dirt. Yeah, yuck. Maybe that's a manky-ass jug. It actually looks like dirt. Yeah, yuck. Maybe that's just his Cheerio boiling jug. Maybe it is.

That doesn't matter to me, Megan. I think he should have a clean jug for cooking his Cheerios. Oh, yuck. But I don't think he's... Surely he's not actually cooking Cheerios in a jug. Surely that was just to get a rise out of everyone in Rolston. Yeah. Right?

Next up from the Otago Floating page, Maya has a free good that she's trying to sell. It's a knee rover. And she writes, Hi, I'm embarrassed with myself for this, but if you were in the point night line last night with a broken leg and no mobility scooter because a chick had taken your scooter,

I am that chick and I still have your scooter. PME to collect. Oh my God. Maya did that classic thing that people do when they see someone on one of those and they're like, oh my God, can I have a turn on one of those? And then scooted off and never came back.

So that's just the one for the knee. Is that what you mean? Me? Yeah, yeah. Knee rover is what it's called. And it's a scooter and you've got a broken bottom half of the leg. Oh.

What a... So they are in desperate need of that. Yes. Oh, dear. Yes. I was going to be like, don't be embarrassed of yourself, but yet maybe you should be. Yeah, should be.

And finally, from the Littleton, ain't no place I'd rather be page. Oh, yeah, okay. There's quite a juicy post. This one's got Littleton, the no place I'd rather be, Paige. Oh, yeah, okay. There's quite a juicy post. This one's got Littleton. The tea poured. Okay. And Littleton.

I'll leave names out of this. Thanks for putting the final nail in the coffin of Greg and I's three and a half year relationship. Insert name here. Through sleeping with him on the side with no contraception. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Oh, Greg played a part in that. Just found out. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Wonderful news. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Oh, Greg played a part in that. Just found out.

Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Wonderful news. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Sarcasm. We'll make sure to let you know the results from the STD checks I now have to get. Look forward to meeting you again.

Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Paul says, this is far too trashy for Littleton. This is, yeah, Someone had high expectations. And I'm no expert on this. Yeah. But the person that sent this in, they're not involved.

They're not one of the parties. But people just screen cap on their phones and send them in. That little flame icon, does that mean they've got Tinder open? Yeah, it does, yeah. I'll play. Always good to have it running in the background in case you get a match. Or probably trying to find this person who's recently single and about to be found either clean or riddled with STDs.

That is today's community notices. If you see anything on your local Facebook page, screen cap it and send it to us. We're FVMZM on Facebook. I sure hope this pre-recorded laughing isn't after something inappropriate to laugh at, but I just want to take a moment to say thanks to Spark for sponsoring the Fletch, Fawn and Megan podcast. You can grab Spark's $29 prepaid rollover packs

and get stacks of extra value. Back to the podcast. Actually, while I've got you, Fletch and Megan, it's science-a-thon time. The girls wanted me to ask you if you'd sponsor them for science-a-thon. How much do you me to ask you if you'd sponsor them for Science-o-thon. Oh, I will sponsor them. Yeah, I'd love to.

You can sponsor per question. So, wait, per question they get right? Yes. And he's got 20 questions. August has got 10. Are you working out the maximum you'll have to pay? Fletcher's on his phone doing the calculation. It's easy, mate.

Just times anything by 20. $20 divided by how many questions? 20. I'll do a dollar a question. Yeah, 10 cents. You're doing 10 cents a question. $2.

Don't even bother. Don't even bother. $2. I'll do a dollar a question. Where's this money going? I think a new turf. A new sports turf. Oh, that's good.

God, you're a Grinch. $5 max. A question. No, that's good. God, you're a Grinch. $5 max. A question. No, not a question. Come on, Uncle Moneybags. You don't have any kids. You've just been to bloody Croatia. I don't have kids for this reason,

so I don't have to spend bloody money on AstroTurf. Right. Well, this is why I'm talking about it, because they were practicing for Science of Fun last night. Okay. By the way, they'll be hitting 20 questions out of 20 questions.

Yeah, exactly. Because they both got 20 questions. So I might have to cough up 40 answers already. $40? Yeah.

So, I said, they said, well, who else is going to sponsor us? I said, well,

if you want them to sponsor you, you've got to ring Nana and Gigi. That's what we call my parents. You've got to ring them and ask them nicely

if they're like, oh, should we, can we use this thing? Okay. And point at the landline. Why do you have a landline? Because it came with the internet. It's one of those landlines that goes through the internet.

Yeah, but everyone hits it. You don't plug it in. No, it's plugged in. Why? I don't know. It's so weird when people have landlines. I'm like, why are you paying for this? You have a number.

Yeah, I do. It's a rad number. Obviously, I'm not saying it on air. But there are lots of double digits. Yeah. Yeah, that's good. I like that. I hand-picked it.

It was pretty. To be totally honest, the only reason was it said, when we were signing up, it said, do you want the landline? And it's like, you can pick your own number. I was like, you ticked it, yes. And then I went through what numbers I could pick and I found one. I was like, oh, I love that.

So yes, I'll have it. Right. And who rings on this landline? My mum. I'm going to call you on it one day. No, I'm not. I hate phone calls. It's weird when it rings

and you look at the number that's coming up and it's not my mum's. It's like, who's that? Oh, you don't answer it then? Don't answer it. I always answer it. Curiosity. So they said, can we use this thing?

Yeah. And pointed the landline. I was like, yeah, okay, sure, you can use that. Yeah. And they were like. They were jazzed. Because what they normally use, the cell phone. We always just Skype them.

Oh, you're right. Okay. Always Skype. The mum will call me if she, but the kids generally will be at school or she'll just ask me how to get Sky to connect or something and

then we'll be done but if she wants to talk to the kids she always Skypes yeah right and or FaceTimes on phones or you know

very rarely do they pick up the landline so they were like picked it up and they're like how does this thing even work it's nuts

yeah and I was like well you've got to dial the number, but you've got to press talk first and hold it to your ear. I'm like, what can you hear? And then he's like, oh, it's a beep. I'm like, alright, you're ready to go.

Now dial the number, and I told her my parents' number, but she took so long that it started going that, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot. She's like, what is this? Doot, doot, doot, doot, doot. And I was like, you've taken too long hang up how do I do that press end press talk again so it's not even like a really old school land like yeah you can take your time yeah and then you press call it after you've told the number yeah right so it is not even like an old school landline with a touch it's one of those yeah

like you need in cordless bad boys yeah right so then take two yeah um and she puts it up to air and she's like is that ringing i'm like yeah it's ringing and she's like where are they where are they i was like well they'll take the little okay and then you hear and it's like hey whoa hey nana hey hey hey out. I'm just, relax. Relax. And what's Nana thinking? My Nana's like, oh. Because my mum's like, hello.

Because she sees the caller display. She just thinks it's me. And she's like, oh, hello. Is this you, Indy? And she's like, yes. How did you know? And mum, they start talking about it. I'm like, ask her what you remember.

Oh, yeah, Nana. Does she need to stop talking before I start talking? Like as a walkie-talkie because I've had walkie-talkies and I've taught them the rule is you can't both talk on one, so you've got to talk and let the other person talk. Do you teach them to say over? Over. I try to.

Roger. And then when you're Roger, message received. Yeah, no, it was good. It was a good day at school. It was a good day. Hey, Nana, do you reckon you'd like to sponsor me for the science? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How many questions are there?

And they have a bit of a chat, and she's like. And he's like, I think August wants to use this. I think August wants to use this. I'll pass you. August is like holding the phone ages away from marie she's like hello and her face lights up she's like it is nana oh my god oh she has a little talk to her and then she's like um is gg there yeah i'll get him for you okay she's part of this show.

Hi. Hi. And they have a bit of a chat. And she's like, I think Vaughn wants to have a word. It's August. I think Dad wants to talk to you. She's like, I think Vaughn wants a word. So she's an old mate headspace of using a landline already.

I'm like, okay. And I have a bit of a chat to them. And they were just like standing there looking at me. They're like, look at what? I don't know. It was weird. They were just so fascinated by it. And then I was like, all right, well, I'll talk to have a bit of a chat to them. And they were just like standing there looking at me. They're like, look at what? I don't know. It was weird. They were just so fascinated by it. And then I was like, all right, well, I'll talk to you later.

A bit hung up. And they were like, are they gone? I was like, yeah, they're gone. I was like, oh. What an adventure. They were both just so jazzed about using a phone. Wow. I'm sure they've used it before, but for some reason last night they were just...

Yeah, right. Maybe they can't remember using it, but they were very excited about it. And I told them about the old Rotary Dial fines. Oh, yeah. That would have blown their minds. Blew their minds. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. ZM. It's Kygo, Whitney Houston on ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. I've broken my microphone. He's literally having to just hold it. I'm having to hold it. Because I've got to.

I've always wondered if. I'm going to film you. Because it's going to lighten. Is the light coming down? Is the light working? The light's in the upper part. The light's in there, Megan. I always wonder where the light's at.

I always wonder where the light's at. Like a Terminator. You've actually snapped that. Yeah, it snapped right off. But I hold my mic. Anyway, moving on. Vaughan. I'm glad so much trouble. But I hold my mic. Anyway, moving on. Vaughn. I'm glad this is so hilarious for Instagram.

Can we move on? You can probably pinch that arm. It's like you're doing a performance on stage. James is getting me another arm. He's a good guy. He's a good man, isn't he? He's a good man. Quiet but gets it done. Oh, hang on.

I've got to play the music, but I have to hold the mic. Hang on. Do you need me to hold it for you? No, this is... He's just dangling his mic. Don't! The mic's going to hit the keyboard. Don't dangle it there.

It'll hit your coffee. Tsk, tsk. There we go. We've got some music. This is not your first day on the job. But it was the first day on the job for a pilot in Australia. Seamless segue.

So this guy, he wanted to learn to fly. This is an incredible story. And took off from Perth's Jandakot Airport on his first lesson in a two-seater aircraft. You know the sort, the little ones they have to tie down in case the wind's too big and it blows them away. You always see them coming into land and you're like, oh, a Cessna situation. So not only was it his first lesson in a small Cessna, his wife and children were watching him from the ground. Yay.

Oh, yay. Daddy can fly. Daddy can fly. Daddy can fly. I don't know if I'd want my wife and children watching my first flight. Well, certainly it may become a little bit more nerve-wracking for them when sometime into the first flight, the flight instructor passes out. Brilliant.

Goes into an unconscious state. And it's at that point that trainee pilot, Max Sylvester, on his first day, has to radio the tower to ask if they know how the bloody hell he's going to get out of this sticky pickle. Is there a button you have to push to radio the tower or are they just in your ears?

Yeah, you press it. Imagine if you're like, Oh, how am I talking to these guys? He obviously tells them I'm in a bit of a pickle here. Do you know how to operate the aeroplane? Very, very light. This is my first lesson.

Are they unconscious? He's leaning over my shoulder. I'm trying to keep him up but he keeps falling down. What we're going to do is make sure that the wings stay level and that you keep a consistent speed and consistent altitude. Your job right now is just keep focusing on that aircraft as best you can. Secondary to that is just to keep his head upright and his body upright in the space. But we're gonna get you on the ground very soon and get both of you guys on the ground safely.

You're doing really, really well. You're doing an amazing job. Yeah, well, my flight instructor did say that I was the best student he's had. So we definitely have a story to tell at the end of the time. This is a humble bragging. Get a humble bragging. Yeah. Yeah, well, my flight instructor did say I was pretty good.

Yeah, I was a bit terrified. I'd be like, all right, mate, let's land it, and then we'll see how bloody good you are. But that's the New Zealander in a say. Like, calm down, mate. You haven't landed yet. Oh, that's so funny. But he did.

He landed. He landed it. He survived, which is great, because otherwise the kids and their wife would have seen quite an awful situation unfolding. But they knew he was doing not an emergency landing, but, you know, it's a risky landing. And she's like, watch, watch daddy. Because what do you have to do before you do your first flight?

Is there like a whole lot of like paperwork and simulator? Because I know you can do simulators for those kind of things. So would he have taken off and landed in a simulator? I don't know. Maybe. He did when he landed, he did do a couple of bops on the ground before. Oh, so it wasn't perfect. No, he's like, oh no,

oh, you know, you touch it and you're like, oh no, oh no. And they're like, just down here. Button off and he's like, not the best first landing I've ever seen, just another safe mate with your bragging mate, okay? Yeah, but no, he, hell of a first, hell of a first timer. Would that put you Mate With your bragging Mate Okay Yeah but No he

Hell of a first Oh what a story Hell of a first timer Would that put you off Going back again Doing that again Either it would put you off Or you'd be like

Me personally Yeah I wouldn't have gotten that Flying coffin in the first place You've been in a small plane before Not that small Really No

It would Me getting out of that small Really? No It would Me getting out of that plane It looks like It would look like That episode of The Simpsons Where that really tall guy Gets out of that car And he's like

You're laughing at me Because the size of my automobile Like It looks so small I don't even think my Like If I was I have to make sure

The person sitting beside me Was the same weight Or we'd take off And we'd be Uneven Yeah Yeah right Okay

No Not for you Not for you Not in a plane that small I like my planes wait or we'd take off and we'd be... Uneven. Yeah. Yeah, right. Okay. No. Not for you. Not for you. Not on a plane that small. I like my planes a little bit bigger. But we were wondering off the back of this, what happened the first time out? Now, this might be the first day at a new job. Yeah. Maybe you were just absolutely put in

the deep end on your first day at work and you're like, I don't know how to do this. And maybe it was a training. Maybe it wasn't flying a plane, but maybe it was another sort of training where you were just there to learn how to do something and it all relied on you. So what did you have to do on your first day? Give us a call.

0800 DALS at AM. You can text in 9696. We're talking about what happened on your first day. A pilot on his first day in training had to land the plane after the flight instructor passed out Did he like nudge him enough? Well he said he kept like falling onto him Kept trying to sit him up and he kept falling and flopping back onto him

Some text messages In my first time bartending I spent the night serving the 50 year old aged whiskey for the price of a two year whiskey That's an expensive mistake Very expensive mistake an expensive mistake. Very expensive mistake. Very expensive mistake. First day of work at the new office, the office admin lady was most unfriendly. Downright nasty.

And I said to the manager, what's the deal with the bitch out the front? Oh no, he's married to her? That was his wife. Howie laughed. I think he agreed. Yeah. And it probably should have been in the introduction booklet. Yeah, you'd think that. Some sort of booklet.

Tell you what it is. Victoria, what did you have to do on the first day of work? My first day as a health and safety advisor, someone shot a nail through their cheek. And then another person shot three fingers together with a different nail. Was this in the one day? Yeah.

Good Lord. Wow, and so as a health and safety advisor, were you like, don't do that? Yeah, well, the guy with the cheek was very lucky because he didn't have any damage. It just went straight through. How do you nail gun your cheek? Except you couldn't drink soup anymore.

Well, like, it was a different, like a wrong angle that the other person was shooting it. And then they shot it at the wrong angle and it went through the piece of wood into their cheek. Oh, my God. And then the other person had their fingers too close to the nail gun and slipped and shot. Wow. And you were like, on your first day, you're like, wow. They're not on nail guns anymore.

Bad nail guns. I might go back to hammers until they bloody well point one. Wow, that's a good day. Victoria, thanks for your call. No, thank you. Some other text messages about your first time out. A Navy medic. My first time away at sea, I got very, very seasick.

And we had two men overboard. So I had to deal with that. I had to help them recover from hypothermia while also vomiting into a bucket. Isn't that somewhere in the joining the Navy thing? Do you get seasick? Do you get seasick? And then, oh, just go join the Air Force instead or the Army. Or do they just give them seasick pills?

I don't know. You get used to it perhaps? My brother, his friend, and I had our first solo parachute jumps. Done the training to do the first solo jump. My brother's friend was first out. He had one foot on the wheel, one hand on the wing strap

and he froze. He wouldn't go out and he wouldn't come back on the plane and the jump master just kicked him in the back. Oh my God. And sent him flying

and we were all like, oh, we don't want to do it anymore because if we freeze, he's just going to boot us out. My legs just went. I know. My teeth were like goosebumps. It's just like, ugh.

And I mean, I've done that, but Tando, I can never do it myself. I'd panic and be like, I'd just jump straight out of the plane and pull it. And end up in the propellers. Get caught in the back of the plane. I'd be dragged behind the plane. It'd just be a comedy of errors. And they were like, we're going to land, you just run real fast. First day of work, I had to pretend I was the foreman as there was an inspector coming

to look at the work and the actual foreman had diarrhea and had shittin's pants and couldn't come out of the portal. He was too embarrassed. Yeah, right. So I had to pretend to be foreman on my first day of work and show people what they had questions for. This sounds like a prank. It does sound like a test, doesn't it?

On the newbie. On the apprentice. Yeah. Joke's on them. It does sound like a test, doesn't it? On the newbie. On the apprentice. Yeah. Joke's on them if they fail their inspection because the apprentice doesn't know where to point anything out. Well, yeah, that's true. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM.

Hey, I've kind of battled with this behind the scenes for years and I've just carried on. I've never liked seeing it spelt E-H. But there's been an article, the spinoff's done an article. Many people were asked. We've run our own social media quiz. We've talked about it around work. And I don't think I'll change my ways.

But what is the correct spelling of A? A. A. You know. You want to go, eh? Yeah. You want another drink, eh Yeah You want another drink eh You asked for a

Long black eh Like Yeah For the question And I've always spelled it A-Y-E Me too Cause that's A Me too

But like Cause this all started with a tweet Didn't it And then someone just It all just Happened online Yeah And people are now

Well how is It said And how is it spelled Yes how is it spelt? Yes. And apparently if you're writing A-Y-E, that is said like pirates. Aye, aye, captain. Aye, aye. That's how you'd say aye.

No. Yes. Not why you can say it however you like, but I'll say it. Aye. Yeah, same. I think I'm still going to spell it A-Y-E, but apparently that's not at all even close. E-H seems to be what people settled on. E-A for...

See, to me, that's eh. Eh. Yeah, because you go meh. Yeah. Meh. M-E-H. M-E-H. Meh.

So without the M, it's eh. And then the other way... Eh is a word, but it's not... Do you want another drink, eh? It's eh. Yeah. I'm indecisive. Eh.

But then the other way is A-E. A-E. A-E is more eh. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, If you've just joined this break, we're trying to figure out how to spell A. We're not just grunting. Yeah. Well, let's go to the social media centre where intern Anya is standing by. If you want to imagine what the social media centre looks like, it's like a big NASA space centre with lots of screens. 100%. And on one screen is Facebook. On the other, Twitter.

And there's LinkedIn on one screen for some reason. I don't know, maybe Anya's looking for a job. Well, it's always important to keep your options open. Instagram, yeah, there's lots of feeds to various, like, pop culture things happening around the world. It's all going on in the social media centre. And in turn, Anya, you've got the latest.

Fletch doesn't have a microphone on. Yeah, that's cool. It's a different feed through to the social media centre. Than a usual. Than a usual feed, yeah. Why are the through to the social media centre. Than a usual. Than a usual feed, yeah. Why are the producers in the social media centre? The other producers? Oh, they've just popped in for a cuppa.

Oh, right, okay. Yeah, we're just briefly catching up on all sorts of stuff. Well, social media's where the money is, so she's got the best facilities for tea and such. Yeah, I've got an espresso in here. Oh, wee! See, that's a-you-ee. Yeah.

Ooh-ee. Ooh-ee. Ooh-ee. So, I've ran a poll on Instagram. You've run a poll? See that's A-U-E Yeah U-E U-E U-E So I've run a poll On Instagram You've run a poll Oh my god Sorry being posh

What's wrong with the show today Everybody shush for a minute Everybody So you can hear the fans Of the computers running On the social media centre Listen Yeah the hum

It's got to have lots of Cooling fans Yeah Well there's so many Computer screens Yeah So for EH Um, it's got to have lots of cooling fans. Yeah. Well, there's so many computer screens. So many computer screens. Um, so for EH, we're sitting on 39%. Yeah.

And then AE is sitting on 61%. Yeah. But there's been a flaw in the poll because you can only add two options. And I've got one, two, about a bajillion DMs in here saying it's AYE. Yeah, I'm all for AYE. Yeah, so I've crunched some numbers, and I think it's about 33% for all of them. That's not scientific.

Maths over and out. Right. Yeah, okay, so maths not the strong point there from the social media centre. No, majority AE, I reckon. Maybe like on 34% would be A-E. A-E? Yeah.

I've never even considered that an option. A. Where have these cretins been educated? Why don't we all just write A? Like just the letter A. No, because then I'll start saying A. Yeah. I don't want to be, yeah.

Do you want another drink? A. We spell it A-Y-E because it's like I, right? E-Y-E. You add an A and it's like A. Like I. A. I don't know.

Is that why we do that? That's I-I. But it's slang. We can spell it however we want, can't we? I know the Canadians are big on the E-H. Aren't they? The Canadians are all about the E-H. We say pay.

Oh, no, that's P-A-Y-E. Pay. No, P-A-Y, pay. I know. I was meaning P-A-Y-E. You say P-A-Y-E as pay as you earn. That's an acronym. Yeah, I know.

Not a word. No, I was trying to say you say pay, but that's not spelled the same as A. Some people are just saying it's A-Y. It's always been A-Y for them, like day, May, bay, cray. See, I'm right on board with that one. That would be my second option. Yeah. A-Y.

A-Y. Yeah, okay. Someone said, I'm a Canadian when I first moved here in 2004. I was so bloody confused whenever I saw A-Y-E written down. I thought it was pronounced I, which was super weird, but it was your accent. And in Canada, it's E-H all the way. Well, he says it all the time at the end of sentences.

Eh, that's E. But that's the eh. You're having a good time in Canada. Boots and mooses in the boots. Eh. I just put in Google Translate, A-Y-E. It's like, see? Is there a pronunciation?

You know how you get Google to pronounce? A? Pronounce? Pronounce. No, it's confusing because pronunciation. A-E is yes and today-o. So, A-E is spoken for. It's like saying you want to bear, yes?

Yeah. Here's what Google. I. It's A-Y-E is I. Yeah, so. Whatever Google translate. Shut up, Google. You don't know us. Here's what Google I That's A-Y-E Is I Yeah so Whatever Google translate Shut up Google You don't know us

You don't know anything Do we actually need To write it The sentence can probably Finish before A Just put a question mark Who said that No I'm just saying

We've gone on about this For ages Would you like another drink Question mark And someone would be like Oh that's very formal we've gone on about this for ages. All right, fun place. Would you like another drink? Question mark. And someone would be like, oh, that's very formal. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's fact of the day. What are you looking up there? Hand juices. Fletch and I are just talking juices. Oh, yeah. Today's fact of the day. What are you looking up there? Look at this hand juicer. Hand juicer. Fletch and I are just talking juices. Excuse me. Oh, yeah. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I want, but that's like real bougie.

It's like a kitchen one. You've got a bougie juicer. Did we talk about the Desperate Housewives juicer on air, or was that a dream? Yeah, we did. We did, okay. It's really weird. Sometimes I think what we talk about Is more likely to be so weird

It happened in a dream Than it happened in real life As a promotion for the show Desperate Housewives We were sent hand juicers They were really good But they've just done the dash Yeah

They didn't last long Did they? No you definitely need that juicer And then you can give me your old one Well this isn't bad The hand juicer is where it's at Because it just cleans easy Whereas a juicer

Isn't a juicer machine You've got to get it out from under the bench and then you've got to clean it. It's an absolute admin. This is what Fletch does. He upgrades all his stuff and then gives us all his hand-me-downs. What does that one set you back?

Oh, definitely not. It's $169. I'm just going to stand with my standard $2 plastic one. Oh, yeah. And those little teeth at the end catch the seeds. What a hoot those were. And then sometimes they go over the teeth and you're like, no, the teeth are not doing their job.

Naughty teeth. The teeth are to catch the seeds. Damn you, teeth. Curse you, $2 juicer. And now you're up to date with juicing. Yeah. What were we doing? Oh, fact of the day. Oh, right. No, okay. I thought to date with juicing. Yeah. What were we doing?

Oh, fact of the day. Oh, right. No, okay. I thought we were doing juicing. Today's fact of the day is that after nuclear tests at the Bikini Atoll, this was the testing grounds for the United States. Everybody, every major nuclear power had a Pacific Island that they tested their nuclear bombs at. They tested them

at Bikini Atoll. Bikini Atoll, yep. Which was beautiful but now completely uninhabitable for some 10,000 years. Oh wow. For obvious reasons.

What was the one that the French tested at? Muradola. Muradola Atoll. That's right, that's right. Often they had people from their armed services

and boats nearby to observe them. They all died of horrific nuclear poisoning. And Suncham, a lot of people have seen Chernobyl and know that that's no walk in the park. Certainly wouldn't rush to go there. It says I can go for a diving holiday in Bikini Atoll. I wouldn't. Oh, really?

I would stay away. Right. Well, in 1947, a biologist from the University of Washington went back to Bikini Atoll two years after the tests of the bombs called Abel and Baker were set off. This is early days. And they collected some fish and searay those fish using the nuclear energy that was caught inside those fish. They didn't even need an X-ray machine to go and flash them to see through them. They literally used the energy within that fish to X-ray itself.

So they tried to X-ray it, but it was just completely, you couldn't see anything. Like glowing. It was just this mass you couldn't see anything. Like glowing. It was just this mass of glowing everything. Yeah, right. So they put it in the same conditions as the x-ray, clicked it, without shooting the poof to get the x-ray to see the bones, and they could see through the fish. They were x-raying animals there.

Now this really surprised them because they were like, heck-a-doodles, because I'm in the 40 40s so that would have been a pretty high end swear word. Heck a doodles, surely the Pacific Ocean's washed away all the nuclear waste by now. And spread it evenly throughout the world so that it's not concentrated in one spot but it had not known it was so concentrated in the area and it was particularly in the digestive system because of the food chain, it was so concentrated in the area, and it was particularly in the digestive system of everything because of the food chain.

Yeah. It got into every aspect of it. So the bigger the animal got, of course, it had eaten an animal smaller and smaller and smaller and smaller. So it was the most nuclear. Yeah, right. With the bigger the creatures got. The ones that survived, that is.

Most of them probably died. Yeah. But yeah, so they just x-rayed them using the radiation from the animal itself. And now you can go on a holiday. They're a diving holiday. You learn any more about this Bikini Airtel diving holiday? No, I just saw that you can go book it.

Seven nights? How much for seven nights? Your life. Eventually, yeah. A painful death. Yeah, $9.99 plus your life. Yeah. Brilliant.

Easy. One way, you'll probably only buy a one way ticket. Stay there after seven days and just die in painful radiation poisoning. So today's fact of the day is in 1947, a fish was x-rayed using its own radioactivity. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Want to talk about Sesame Street now? Okay. We've all had a dose of Sesame Street. Sesame Street's still going. It's been going since like the 70s. That's right. Like just about everybody would have had some exposure to Sesame Street. Sesame Street's still going. It's been going since like the 70s. That's mad. Like just about everybody would have had some exposure to Sesame Street.

Yeah. Is that like the longest running TV series? TV show? I don't know because a lot of it's, I don't know how it would be classified. Oh yeah, true. I don't know if it runs week to week or it would have a bunch of episodes. But then also the key to Sesame Street is the repetitive nature of it. Like the same segments, the learning segments are in multiple episodes. Law and order.

What was that book? What was that book? The Tipping Point or something? Yeah. One of those. Someone was like, I read this. I read this.

It'll change your life. And I read it. And it was a really interesting book, Malcolm Gladwell book. He talks about how Sesame Street and Dora, so repetitive, but that's the key to getting it through and kids can watch the same thing over and over. Well, a study in the American Economic Journal

of Applied Economics says that Sesame Street helps improve school performance for children exposed to it before they're seven, particularly if they're male and has long-term positive outcomes for its viewers in both the education system and the workforce and i would say generally just in life yeah yeah because sesame street and even now like they've really branched out they've got um a because they are muppets i like to call them up even though they're on sesame street they're muppets because they're a jim henson creation they're a monster

puppet i've said my piece on that just go they're notuppets because they're a Jim Henson creation. They're a monster puppet. I've said my piece on that. Just go with me now. They're not puppets. They're Muppets. Oh, my God. Does Muppet mean monster puppet? Yeah. Wow. Learning.

Monster puppets. So the Muppets, they're a Muppet. If they're on Shortland Street, they've had a wheelchair-bound Muppet. Did I say Shortland Street? Sesame Street, yeah. So if there is a puppet on Shortland Street, it's not a Muppet. You know what? They should.

They should. They should. They should be on. Yeah. So if there is a puppet on Shortland Street It's not a Muppet You know what, they should How good would it be if there was a story arc On Shortland Street And there was a puppet and no one mentioned that it was a puppet It's like, oh the new doctor's starting today No it didn't have to be either a receptionist or a bartender So I was always behind something The new receptionist has started You're in close to Shortland Street And never mention that it's a puppet

Brilliant And then someone, a new character joins on day And they're like, is that a puppet? And everyone on the show is like, how dare you? Like, how dare you? And that kicked off the show I love it They're like, right now, immediately

I love it Okay, so that's a good idea for the side But on Sesame Street, they've had a Muppet in a wheelchair They've had a Muppet who suffers from autism i think they had a refugee okay uh they've had spanish speaking muppets every everything so it's so inclusive and it teaches people to deal with people that are different than them yeah so i can totally see how it carries on to being um good throughout life and sesame street teaches us things Like it taught me about taking the two parts of a word and like just slamming them together.

Yep. Remember that? Yep. Like half of the word would be said by the mouth on that side and then half, half, half, and they'd say it. Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. And then it would make a word. Right.

Okay. Quick would be a good example. You'd be like quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. And you'd be like quick. And then you'd be like, quick, ick, quick, ick, quick, ick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. And you'd be like, quick. And then you'd be like, done. Putting the sounds together. We've got a lot to thank. Gosh.

Sesame Street 4. I learned so much. And let's not stop at Sesame Street. I learned from Dora. I learned that Spanish for circle is circular. That's all I can remember. Because she gave me too, She didn't give me enough time To think about it

And she would be like And what do you think? And then she'd give the answer And be like Dora, I don't have time More time I need more time, Dora So I'd like to know this morning

What TV taught you? Because it's It doesn't need to be kids TV Could it be adult TV? Because of all the cooking shows? Oh yeah, could Yeah, right You'd learn some stuff from those Maybe you've got a signature all the cooking shows? Oh yeah, could. Yeah, right. You'd learn some stuff

from those. Maybe you've got a signature dish from a cooking show. Oh yeah, okay. That would be good. Okay. If you've got a signature

dish from a cooking show. Megan, has TV ever taught you anything? I think just all the inappropriate things. You know? Because I don't remember ever sitting down

with my parents. I think TV and movies taught me everything I know. But then that's good because then you know what's going on. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. You know, if you'd never seen movies and your parents had never explained something, you wouldn't know about a social circumstance. Yeah. And you might be a bit awkward in them. Okay, well... TV's taught us so much.

Let's take some calls. What is the one thing that TV's taught you that you remember? That you remember. That you remember and is your go-to? And it doesn't need to be a kid's show. It could be like an adult show. No, it's just...

It could be anything later in life. That's just stuck with you. Yeah. Maybe it was one of those arts and crafts segments on one of those good morning shows. What did that... Maybe you learnt how to do a lovely wicker flower basket. I don't know. Anything.

Things that TV has taught you. Amy, what did TV teach you? So, you know, when you're making a toasted sandwich and you put butter on the outside and you put it in the pan and it always burns? Yeah. Well, if you put a thin layer of mayonnaise, the oil helps crisp up the bread

and it goes nice and golden and it never burns and you get the perfect toasted sandwich. And it tastes better. Oh my God, thank you, television. Do you remember where exactly you got that from? It was either like a Gordon Ramsay

or a Jamie Oliver, some British guy. I just remember my toasted sandwiches have never been the same. Wow. I think it was Jamie Oliver. I think I remember that.

Now I want a toasted, you know I don't own a toasted sandwich maker and I always think I've got to get one. What is wrong with you? Go to Kmart. Yeah, I know because they're real cheap there. Just with you? Go to Kmart. Yeah, I know

because they're real cheap there. Just don't have a pen. Yeah. No, but it's not the same. You've got to have it sealed and triangles. No, no. Like molten lava popping.

No, no. See, I'm against the sealed edge because of too many burnt mouths. Oh, right. That's like a chaffle situation. You're asking for trouble. Yeah. Amy, thanks for your call.

Ruben, what did TV teach you? The orange, sorry, un on orange is the new black. They taught me how to shave properly, so to not go against the hair. Oh, you'd been told to go against the hair. Oh, sorry, to go with the hair. To go with the hair, yeah, yeah, yeah. Previously, you'd been told the opposite, to go against it.

I hadn't been told not to. I just thought it kind of, it gave a cleaner shave, but also a lot of ingrown hair. Rashy and ingrown. You've got to be careful with the old ad. Because no, there's no,

no one really teaches you, do they? I mean, I guess your dad could, but my dad always had an electric shaver, so he never did a blade shave. And like when I shave my legs,

I go against the grain. So if I shaved my face, I would have just thought that that was. You go against it as well. Same thing. Yeah. Same thing.

Ruben, thanks for your call. Some other texts. After many years of unsuccessful baking, an episode of Jamie Oliver's cooking show showed me the baking powder is not yellow. And I was like, that's weird. I'm going to go check my baking powder. Custard.

I'd been using custard powder this whole time. What? No, but if you buy Edmonds, they both come in a box. Similar box. Yeah. It's just one's like... And you'd have a big box of custard powder and you're going to lose a tablespoon and a teaspoon at a box. Similar box. Yeah. It's just one's like. And you'd have a big box of custard powder in your hand and it lives on a tablespoon and a teaspoon at a time.

You're like, everything's really thick but not rising. Yeah. Runny. Oh, no. Muchos runny. My son learned some big and interesting words from Minecraft videos on YouTube. Like he came and said phenomenal one day as like a young kid.

We were all like, where did you learn that? It was like YouTube. Like he came and said phenomenal one day as like a young kid and we were all like, where did you learn that? It was like YouTube. Winnie the Pooh taught me that it's okay to get distracted by food as long as you don't end up hurting your friends. Fair enough. That's a good life lesson there. Dora taught me that grandma

in Spanish is abuela. Oh yeah. Abuela. Oh Jane the Virgin told me that. Yeah did she? Yeah. Gwen Stefani taught me how to spell banana. Gwen Stefani. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

And Fergie taught me how to spell glamorous. Yes. Brilliant. That's always good. Good to know those things. Somebody said RuPaul's Drag Race

taught my 11 and 12 year old Tolerance for people who choose a different lifestyle And sometimes people are mean Because they're having a difficult time in their life They've also learnt lots of swear words they didn't know before And what a D-I-L-D-O is And I bet they're extra fab too D-I-L-D-O

Fabulous ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast If you enjoyed this podcast Why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too Fabulous