ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - September 17 2018

Episode Date: September 16, 2018

A heroic tramping story from Mount Taranaki, Mosh Monday and did you take a finders fee?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Spark. You can stay connected with free Wi-Fi, a gig a day, on the $19 Spark prepaid rollover pack. Enjoy. Thanks, Anya. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. What were the royals' names? David Stevens and Davina Scott.

That's still quite posh sounding, isn't it? Davina Scott. David and Davina. But if you could pick any name, would you go those two? They should have gone, like, Karen Davidson and Stephen Fletcher. Barry. Fletcher. Barry Fletcher.

Mr. Fletcher, welcome. Yes, yes. You look like Prince William. But I'm not. Barry Fletcher. Mr. Fletcher, welcome. Yes, yes. You look like Prince William. I get that a lot. But I'm not. Barry Fletcher. Even like big celebs do this, don't they?

Like have the pseudonyms. They book hotels and flights under. But then how can you book flights under a fake name? Oh, I don't know. No, no, it's reserving a privilege. It's getting a privilege, isn't it? Yeah. Oh, right, okay. But they're going to have to change those now.

Because everybody's on to it. They're not going to be known as that anymore, are they? Because word got out. Yeah. Word got out. I know Elton John used to be, he used to have some great hotel pseudonyms. Oh, yeah. When he was checking in.

Sir Binky Poodleclip. Right. I can't even say that one. That's very rude. He's quite a rude... I can say Sir Horace, but I can't say the last name of Sir Horace. Judas Fart.

He's running the risk of them cancelling the booking because they think someone's having a laugh. Look at this one that I can't read out. Just for... Oh my goodness. Can you read that from there? I had no idea he was so filthy. I think he just wants to hear people say that

when he goes to check in. Like, oh yes, I've got a... Booking the reference number is... Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. They're like, unusual that someone doesn't just say their name. Reference number. Oh yes, welcomes.

Don't even think about reading that out. I'm not going to. I'm not going to. It would be a bad sign. Don't even think about it. out. I'm not going to. I'm not going to. Do not even think about it. All right, you lot. Listen up. It's story time. All right.

Three news headlines. For three news stories that I've found online, interesting, quirky, unusual news stories while Megan sneezes. Sorry. At least I took my microphone off for a little bit. Okay, I'm done. Carry on. That was like three in a row. Sorry. At least I took my microphone off for a little bit. Okay, I'm done. Carry on.

That was like three in a row. Yeah. Is eight the magic number? That's not a thing. It's not a thing. That's what they say, eight equals an orgasm. I've definitely done eight. That's not a thing.

Okay, well, slow down because that was three. That was... The only thing that happens when you get to eight is a little bit of wheeze comes out. It's not... That doesn't happen. Just for the record. Well, you stated it.

Wow. Headline one, man makes whopper of a 911 call. Headline two, bull escapes vet before circumcision. And headline three, Ontario residents urged to stop flushing. I would never have thought you would circumcise a bull. Well, that's what the news headline states. It was apparently happening.

How very unusual. Well, maybe it was getting in the way. It was like there was a lot of, I don't know, what the situation is. Yeah. Like a knee-high sock when you just had an ankle sock sort of situation. Yeah. Like this sock's too long for summer.

Far too long. I don't need to pull this all the way up. It's too hot. Yeah, very true. Sometimes you just need an ankle sock. And then you can't roll it down because too much sock bunches at the top of the shoe. Or sometimes religion states you can only wear ankle socks. Yes.

Yeah. Not the full-blown knee socks. Not a hiking sock. Is there a first story about Burger King? There may be a Burger King aspect to it, Megan. Is it called The Authorities because there's something to do with their whopper? No, but yes. What was the third one?

Ontario residents urged to stop flushing. I kind of want to know why they urged to stop flushing. Okay, I'll go with that. We're going with that. I hope it's a fatberg. It's not a fatberg, no. But we go now to Lake Ontario in Canada, where authorities have asked people to stop flushing pets,

unwanted pets. What? And dumping unwanted pets, because they estimate that in the waters of Lake Ontario, 40 to 50 million goldfish live. Wow. Yes. Now, they're calling, you know, we've got them here, the koi carp, the Asian carp fish.

They look like goldfish, but on steroids. Yeah, massive. Yeah. Yeah. So they've got a lot of those as well. And they're kind of nudging out the species that have lived in the lake, you know, forever, the native species. Yeah, true.

Like they do here in New Zealand. The Waikato River had a real problem with koi carp. Yeah, they ate all the fish. All the native fish. All their food, that kind of thing. But, yeah, they reckon that it has come down to the fact that people are dumping and flushing their pets and having the past, and that's what's caused the goldfish to... So not just when they die, because I've heard of flushing the pets when you...

But who's flushing their pet when it's still alive? They're just like, well, I can't be CBF with this goldfish. So they must take it down to the lake and tip it in. Yeah, or flush it. Which is bad because you've got to adjust it to the water, don't you? That's why you leave your bag from the pet store in the water. But they don't care. They don't care.

Well, you're dumping a fish, aren't you? You don't care. And, yeah, they reckon that that's kind of what's caused this problem. But the flushing, wouldn't it go through a treatment plant and everything first? Well, yeah, that's what I thought. But they've said don't flush them. Tipping it down the stormwater drain would go straight to the lake, maybe. Yeah, that would.

I'm surprised they even survive because I keep them in like a bowl and feed it every day and they still die. If you're flushing it, it's going through all that stuff and then it's alive at the end. Yeah, I know. Maybe give it a toilet duck chaser. It's alright.

It's horrible. As I said it, I was like, oh, born. That is terrible. Oh, born. Those are living creatures. Born. But these people are abandoning their pets.

Yeah, they are. Well, they don't care. So, okay. They did a massive cull and removed 45,000. What did they do? They just poured heaps and heaps of food into the lake and the goldfish ate too much and they went belly up. Because that's the only way.

I've seen people kill fish like that. They feed them too much. Yeah, and they float, don't they? I mean, these fish, if they survived the sewage system or the harsh worlds of the storm drains, what are they going to kill them with? Very small fish hooks. Dynamite sticks.

That's what I'd love to see. But then that's just a brutal sweeping kill, isn't it? Oh, yeah. They should start like a little tourist attraction of like fishing for goldfish. It'd be fun. With little wee hooks.

Yeah. And you're guaranteed to get one because there's like there's how many of 50,000 or something. No 40 to 50 million. Are they big

big mummas now? Some of them. Wow. Yeah. Well some species of goldfish only grow to as big as the tank allows them. Yeah so that's why they get into these. And the lake's a pretty big tank isn. Wow. Yeah. Well, some species of goldfish only grow to as big as the tank allows them. Yeah, so that's why they get into these. And the lake's a pretty

big tank, isn't it? Yeah. So they can actually end up being like 50 metres long, Megan. Can they? If it's a huge lake, 50 metres is quite big. You, I don't know where you went for 50. You would have got me at a metre probably. I love the exaggerations. I was like, here we go. He's going to let her up the garden path.

And then you're like, 50 metres long. They can't fit in the swimming pool. You did believe that for a second. Until I did the maths in my head. Visualised. Could you imagine a 50 metre goldfish? You would have got me with a metre. Honestly.

What is the longest one? World's longest goldfish? World's longest goldfish. Or carp. You might have to put in carp? World's longest goldfish? World's longest goldfish. Or carp. You might have to put it in carp. World's biggest carp. It would easily be over a foot long, though, or two foot long. Oh, so they grow in Siamese carps, Thailand.

How big are those? This guy was 222 pounds. What is that, 100 kgs? Look at that goldfish. Oh, that's bigger than a person. That's bigger than a huge snapper. Yeah. It looks like someone shot a goldfish with a ray gun and it's gone.

Yeah. Alien technology. It looks ridiculous. Hell of a situation going in the leafy, horse-centric town of Cambridge. Okay. In the Waikato at the moment. This is the story involving a 72-year-old woman who was arrested for the use of offensive and derogatory language. Insulting and offensive language.

Yes, with an hearing of a public place. And she could be fined up to $1,000 for it. Okay, and go to court and everything. Yep, yep. with an hearing of a public place. And she could be fined up to $1,000 for it. Okay. And go to court and everything. Yep, yep. She's already appeared in the court once. She pleaded not guilty and she's fighting it. This is what's happened.

This is the two sides of it. Whose side of the story do you want? The person that called the police or the woman who got arrested? The person who called the police. Okay. So she said, I'm out before taking my daughter to school

and I'm hanging out the washing. And a tirade begins in my direction from my neighbour, an elderly woman, and part of it is screaming effing N-word at me. Okay, okay. You can imagine my horror. She races back in to get her phone to record the tirade, but it's over when she comes back out, so she calls the police.

The police turn up and arrest the neighbour. What? Had she done anything to deserve this tirade? There's no story as to the backstory of these two, whether or not it's a Neighbours at War episode in the making. I'm not quite sure. Okay. So here's the story from the other point of view.

72-year-old Katarina is going outside. She opens the door, steps right in dog poos. Oh, okay. Diarrhea. Runny dog. She then looks at, and you know when your dog does this, it always looks guilty. It knows what it's done. If it's done something bad, you look at it and it's like, I'm real

sorry. Whereas a cat just looks and be like, and what? So the dog's like, and she's like, effing Nika. Because the dog's name is Nika. N-I-C-A. Oh. And she's saying she screams at a dog because it's diarrhea all over the back door. Yeah, right.

And she stepped in it. It just so happened to be that when she was screaming at her dog, the neighbor was hanging out the washing. And she said, oh, well, I did use the F word quite loudly. I was very annoyed at my 12-year-old dog. I didn't say the N word. No, no, no. That's the dog's name is Nika.

So her neighbour thinks she's calling her an effing N word. Yes. But she's saying Nika. Nika, yeah, the dog's name is Nika. And the dog's name's definitely... Yeah, have we got confirmation as they've got one of those dog tags on? I haven't called the local vet for confirmation myself,

but the story never calls into question. It'd be easy to prove. It would be. The dog would be registered with the name. But then I'm thinking, like, lots of people give their dogs nicknames. Like, whether or not N Nick is shortened from a longer version or just a completely different. Because my wife's family is so weird when I met them,

when I first started going out with her and went to their house, every pet had two names. So it had its formal name, but it had just like a nickname as well. And the nickname was often in no way related to the formal name. Yeah, like I call Leo Lizard sometimes. I don't know why. Give me Lizard. Why?

That's weird. But it's nothing to do with Leo. No. Apart from the shared first letter. She's got to go to court now. Yeah. She's on bail with conditions

not to raise her voice or use offensive language until a hearing in November. Oh, and she's 78. 72. 72. She said, she's 78. 72. 72. She said, I'm not a racist. I worked at Te Wananga o Aotearoa for four years as an IT consultant

and I've never used the N-word. Check the dog's name and be like, oh, that surely is the end of it, right? Yeah. And just a bit of a, oh, if you're going to yell at the dog, don't do it outside. There's got to be some backstory, though. Yeah. Like, there's got to be some beef. Yeah, must be beef between those two. But also where's the evidence? There's no

evidence. No. Like this will just get thrown out and it's just a waste of money and time, isn't it? No common sense here. Absolutely. You'd be a great judge. The waste of resources. You should be a judge.

Not a high court judge. And you get to wear like a wig. Do they wear wigs? Like a community judge. Oh no, that's a very, very high court magistrate thing to do. Just be so blunt. You know how they give like their little speech at the end? The idea is to always make everybody

there feel like idiots. How good would Fletch be? There's a severe lack of common sense being used in this room on both sides. What an absolute waste of everyone's time.

Yeah, I'm good telling off. There's serious crimes out there for me to be dealing with. I can't be dealing with some 72-year-old woman's excitement at her dog pooing everywhere

and the neighbour being a snowflake. Would you say snowflake? Well, I don't know. That's why I think there's got to be some beef here. Yeah, there's got to be a backstory, right? Maybe some noise complaints in the past. And keeping our eye out there, as I do, with community notices.

I've not seen this take to the Cambridge community notices page. Right. What a juicy story. Let's follow that. When's the court? Does it say when the court appearance is? September and November. Oh, God, don't get me started on the slow-moving judicial system.

Judicial system in New Zealand. God, I just want the answer now. That's so slow, you started drinking. Well, you're still deliberating a case. There's been a Nielsen quality of life survey done in New Zealand covering the whole country, different cities throughout and talking to people what makes their city good to live in. Is it good to live in?

And the winner is Tauranga. Tauranga took it out with 91% of residents saying their quality of life was good. It is. Yeah, if you lived there, you'd be stoked. Like, weather's great. You're right near the beach. Yeah.

It's a big city now. It's got things to do. Great outdoor. You've got the Mount right there. Yep. People love going up there for a photo, don't they? Walking up there and letting everybody know they walked up it. Yep.

Good on you. Copenhagen Cones. Yeah, for when you get down the bottom. Not everyone's Instagramming their little Copenhagen Cones at the bottom, though, are they? No. The sweat going up, not about the treats coming down. But here's the best part about it

is people in Tauranga also, Tauranga also are rated really highly for people winching about what they didn't like about their city as well. So it's number one in... It's number one in... But it's also like a lot to complain about.

You know why though? Old people. Old people. It's got you're newly it's also a lot to complain about. You know why though? Old people. Old people. It's got you're newly wed or you're nearly dead. That's what they say about it, isn't it? Although the population's changed. Yeah, it's expanding quite a bit. The population is changing compared to what it used to be.

But it's that classic. They've chosen to sell up and go and move there. So that was the best decision they've ever made because it's a great place. Yeah. Do you love it? I love it. What don't you like about it? Everything.

That's just old people. Old people are too stubborn to admit it. They've made the best decision of their lives but there's definitely room for improvement. Yeah.

So under why has your city become a worse place to live in the last 12 months, they offered, was this traffic and traffic congestion. War traffic and traffic congestion. Tauranga

83% of people's biggest problem with Tauranga was traffic. The next closest was Auckland on 36. So Wow, okay. Huge, huge difference. But it is it can be a bit of a problem at like peak times.

Yeah, it can. Then they were also the first for infrastructure failing to keep up with demand. So Tauranga was the leader of that as well.

You know, more people coming, less things to do. Homelessness, they were second only to Wellington. Tauranga, they don't like it.

Lack of maintenance, they were also up there as well. So while it's like a great place to live, I love that they're like, yes, best place in New Zealand to live,

but here's a list of things you could make it. Well, they'll drop down the whinging list in like 20 years and all the old people are gone. Yeah. Is there like a top five of the best places to live? So overall quality of life, the top five would be Porirua on 85%. Yeah.

Dunedin on 87%. Wellington, 89%. Hutt, that's both upper and lower, and Jabba and pizza. On 90%. Yeah. And Tauranga on 91%. Wow, okay. Where's New Plymouth? Where's my hometown?

Where's Nelson? I just don't even know if either of them were surveyed. Hamilton pops up all the time. What does that say there? But then New Plymouth, like, I feel like there's smaller cities on there. Then New Plymouth. And Nelson. Right.

And they don't make a mention. Yeah. They could have asked. Would it be nice? How do they know there's no better places to live if they're not asking them? Fletch, Vaughn and Megan. The Podcast. Saw this story at the weekend.

I thought, we've got to talk about this today on the show. There are claims that have been made that there are 35 underground bunkers that have been shipped to New Zealand by a bunker-making company in the US. Is something going to happen that we... Well, no, apparently, like, the mega-rich and Americans that have, you know, purchased land in New Zealand, they're believed to be some of the people

that have installed these underground bunkers. So I read this article a few weeks ago, and I thought, man, this would be an interesting thing to talk about. But the more I read, it just spiralled into the craziest conspiracy theories. I know. Like, it's got to be a load of BS. It's got to be. Americans, very rich, mega rich billionaire Americans

have been buying bits of land in New Zealand. Fearing the worst that this will be kind of a safe haven. But I read this thing about how someone had leaked their escape plan and as they were going to meet in an abandoned airstrip in Nevada, kind of read like one of the Terminator sequels, and they could get there on private jets. And this amount of time from there, they would leave in sort of a private jet convoy.

They'd land. One of them's got an airstrip somewhere in the South Island. Then they're all within, you know, miles of each other, and they'll be able to communicate and rebuild society from. It's weird, eh? Oh, this has gone too far. Now, if it's just the bunkers, I can buy into that, because if I was rich, 100% have a bunker.

Would you? So they sell the world's most luxurious panic room. Pretty much, yeah. Slide down and slide into the bunker, lock the door and be in there for however long. So this company sell the budget bunker. That's what it starts as. And from their photos,

it just looks like giant container ships. So you dig a big hole and you bury them and you build on top or you'd build a hatch somewhere to get to it. So how much is a budget bunker? 39,000 US. Now that'll give you a bunk bed, basic air filtration system, and a kitchen counter.

Oh, right, that's very basic. We live in that. By my first time. Yeah, basically, yeah. Some of them have saunas, swimming pools, hot tubs, game rooms. Oh, those are the add-ons. That's how they get you. Yeah, the add-ons.

That's how they get you. And some of them are giant. So they reckon you. Yeah, the add-ons. That's how they get you. And some of them are giant. So they reckon, this company, they reckon that they have shipped several of these to New Zealand. 35 have been shipped to New Zealand, they say. But they've talked to, like, in this news article, they've talked to, like, real estate agents, local councils.

Yeah. And councils are like, well, we've given no resource consent to underground bunkers. But then why would you need a resource consent on underground bunkers? Well, it's a building, but it's underground. I know, it's underground. And the idea is that you get consents and everything so that it's legal and you can sell it on. And if there's a problem and you need to claim insurance, then it's all by the by. But if this is for worst case scenario, you know, oh hi, when all this is

all up in flames and the world's ending and zombies are chewing your faces off, how will I access to claim insurance on my bunker? That's true, yeah. I just don't think you'd bother, would you? No, and you wouldn't want people knowing you had a bunker too, because then people would find you or

use you in the end of the world. I'd love to have a bunker. You see, I'd love to have a bunker. You see, I'd just rather have a... I wouldn't even tell my kids about it. I wouldn't even tell the wife about it. What's going on out there? Oh, I'm putting in a pool. Yay, a pool. Yay, a pool.

Yay, a pool. And then when it all gets grassed over... It's all covered over and it's got a garden on top. They're like, what happened to the pool? I was like, decided against it. Right. I'm going out to the veggie garden. Down my little rabbit hole.

Yeah, I was going to say, what does the door look like? Is it a veggie garden? Little patch? I'd probably disguise it as like a long drop. Right. Because then my wife

and children wouldn't use a long drop toilet anyway. Or a garden shed. There's some spiders out there. Yeah. And they'd never go in it. And that would be your idea. Is that a floor plan

of one of the pool that you're looking at? Yeah, it's huge. It's absolutely huge. This one would be your... Good idea. Is that a floor plan of one of the pool that you're looking at? Yeah, it's huge. It's absolutely huge. This one would be bigger than like some of the mansions. Wow. Around here.

So this is what they say in the article. They reckon that one landed in Picton to cross the Cook Strait after crossing the Cook Strait from Wellington bound for the West Coast.

Another hit the White Amata Harbour bound for Northland. Get out. So they reckon these are all over the country. It came into the Waitemata Harbour, bound for Northland. Get out. So they reckon these are all over the country. It came into the Waitemata Harbour. Yeah, on a ship. Someone would have seen that.

Oh, right, so it stopped off there, then went up to Northland, still on the same ship. I was like, you'd never get over the Harbour Bridge. They're pre-built, and then you just lower them into position. So is that a swimming pool? Yeah. But you can't get a pool guy to go down in your bunker. Who's doing that?

You'd probably have to, I don't know, you'd have some chlorine on standby or you'd have to do it yourself. But if you're mega rich, chlorinating your own doomsday shelter. But then if you forget about the pool for a couple of weeks and it goes green and you've got to drain it, how do you do that?

Or it goes green and then the world starts ending and you're like, oh, I didn't get any chlorine. Honey, I'm risking life and limb to go down to what remains of motor 10 mega. What are you doing that for? Pool's gone green. Okay, see you soon. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith.

Today's Top Six, the Top Six things that All Blacks could have actually done on a Saturday night to make things a whole lot worse. God, doom and gloom when the All Blacks lose. This is the first time they've lost in a while. Yeah, and it wasn't by much, really, was it? It was two points. It wasn't a hiding.

We didn't watch the whole game, caught the end of it, and got to give the South Africans something. Every time the All Blacks ran into them, it was like they were running into a wall. It just stopped them dead. Even the big lads were getting... I was like, ouch. I know they must be real sore after the game.

So sore. I've got sore calf muscles today. Yeah. Because we did a hike. No big, huge South Africans were trying to stop me from doing the hike. I just want to give them the ball.

Oh, are you going to tackle me? You have it. Yeah. You have it. I'd be the great passer. I'd be like, that's Smith. He's a great passer. Because he's terrified of being touched.

Terrified. Yeah. So the top six things they could have done to make Saturday night a whole lot worse. These are some of the headlines that were around. These are crazy. Number six. One of the headlines was high risk, no reward. How the All Blacks...

Spring box loss will shake up the All Blacks. So imagine if they get lost and they actually had to be put in a paint shaker. That's what I'm imagining. It's really going to shake them up. They're shook. Yeah. Basically, that's an old rugby journalist's way

of saying they were shook. Yeah. We lost then. We are shook. Number five on the list, a one hit run headline read, Dark Days. Dark Days, Anne. We are shook. Number five on the list, a one-hit-run headline read, Dark Days. Dark Days Ahead.

Oh. They lost by two points. They didn't steal the sun. Now, if they'd stolen the sun, that would have been another thing that could have made Saturday night a whole lot worse. And you've got to lose to make the win sweeter or something like that. I know, yeah. Yeah.

If it's all wins, you start taking it for granted. Number five on the list of the top six things the All Blacks could have actually done to make Saturday night a whole lot worse, one of the list of the top six things the All Blacks could have actually done to make Saturday night a whole lot worse. One of the headlines, bad omen for the World Cup. They lost. They didn't steal a monkey skull

from a museum in India. Now, if they'd done that, that would have made it a whole lot worse. Everybody knows someone that's at some stage or another stolen a cursed monkey skull. Oh, nothing but trouble. Nothing but trouble. Number three on the list of the top six things the All Blacks could have actually done

to make things a whole lot worse on Saturday night. One of the rugby journalists wrote, watching the last few minutes was like being stabbed slowly. Oh my God. Coming from someone who I'm guessing has never been stabbed because watching sports should be enjoyable. Yeah. Not like being stabbed.

And the All Blacks could have actually stabbed somebody, which would have made that piece... A whole lot worse. A whole lot worse. Number two on the list of the things that All Blacks could have done to make Saturday night a whole lot worse. One headline says, The fallout from the All Blacks loss.

Fallout. Yeah. Like after a nuclear bomb. So the All Blacks could have Fallout. Yeah. Like after a nuclear bomb. So the All Blacks could have actually self-destructed after they lost on Saturday night

causing nuclear fallout. And the number one thing the All Blacks could have actually done on Saturday night to make their loss a whole lot worse, one of the headlines,

All Blacks discarding Jack Goodhue makes a monkey of Steve Hansen. Imagine if they'd lost and they used that monkey skull they stole from India earlier to make Steve Hansen into an actual monkey.

That would have made things a whole lot worse. That's today's top six. A Welsh train company, this is Avia Trains in Wales, are kind of like, they run the place. Okay. They run the trains around Wales. They have a policy which has kind of been out there but not really spoken about. Okay.

They charge you to release lost property. So if you lose something and they have to store it, they've got kind of an admin fee. So if you lose a laptop, for example, and it's found and handed in,

£25 to have that released. What? That's the admin fee because they say they've got to keep that significantly more safe than the other stuff. Mobile phones,

£10. Rucksacks, £3. What? Just a backpack. Great customer service. Really caring about your customers there.

But do they have heaps of lost property? Because they'd almost need a whole separate area to store it. That's a fair point. They'd have to pay someone probably full time,

one or two people. To monitor their lost property. Yeah. So they also, and this is the part where the big problem comes in, they have a policy for cash recovered.

So if you've got a wallet that's got cash in it, they have a 10% fee with a minimum of two pound. So the least they'll take is two pound. So if you were going out for the night on a Friday, Saturday, or you're coming home, you've got a hundred pounds in your wallet. Correct.

Because you've been out drinking or you're going out drinking. They would take. Ten pounds. That's the maximum they would take. Minimum two pounds, maximum ten pounds for the cash in your wallet. What is this train company, the Mafia? I don't know. I can kind of understand

it with a laptop because it's bigger and they have to store it safely. They've got to find somewhere to put it. But like money. Legally can they do that? Probably not.

Well a guy called Adam he said so my lost wallet was found by a revere and they charged me two pounds to release it and then took 10% of the cash in my wallet

as a sort of a reward. What the hell? So he made a formal complaint and they said they, in person at the time, and he said they got the cash out of the till and gave it back to him. So he's like,

they've already, that's already, to me, that's not just like they've set it aside. That's done. That's a done deal. It's inside the till. So they're going to be, to me, that's not just like they've set it aside. That's done. That's a done deal. It's inside the till. So they're going to be, he tweeted about it

and people were like, what? And someone's like, I got my wallet back from them. I never bothered to check how much money was still left in it. Because there was just still money left in it. You'd also assume someone had helped themselves if they'd found it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pre-handing it in.

So they've begun the process of changing that immediately. The policy of what? The policy of stealing their money. I think they're still going to hold on to the reward, the fee. Admin fee. The admin fee. That's so cheeky.

Yeah. Wow. But how long have they been getting away with it for? Years. Ages. Yeah, they said this isn't a new policy. This has been around forever. That's so cheeky.

I know. Did they explain why they take their 10% other than the admin fee? They said, yeah, it's an admin fee and also it goes towards a donation to charity. And this guy's just like... You took it out of the till. I bet the staff Christmas parties are amazing. Yeah, good times at the public transport. But I, you know, we're laughing and saying how bad it is,

but would I? Take a little extra. It depends. If it was like a wallet and had lots of cash in it and there was like some small notes, I'd probably take a fiver. And you know what I'd do with that? I'd put it into the claw machine at the supermarket

and try to win a soft drink. Whenever I find money. Like a finder's fee. It's your finder's fee. If I ever find cash in my car, like a couple of $2, I'm like, oh, yes, claw machine money. Because I don't like getting out, because I've done it a couple of times, you get out money from a cash machine.

The smallest they do is like $10, and then you put $10 into a claw machine and you've got nothing. Yeah, yeah. But if you find money, it's free money. It's free money and you pop it in the claw machine.

So what you want to hear from people that have found something and taken a finder's fee, like a cut. Or maybe they've got something back, they lost it

and then they're like, oh my, something's missing here. Finder's fee's been taken. 5%, yeah. Because like you said, it's the thing, like if I got a wallet

back that I'd lost, you just assume that someone had nicked it before the person that handed it in, right? Yes. Yeah, you just say, oh, that wasn't me. That was gone. I don't know if you had any money in there, but there's no money left, and that totally wasn't me.

Oh, no, because you'd need to look in to find ID. You'd almost play the whole I didn't even open it situation, but you've got to look to find ID and who it belongs to. That would be guilty then, eh? Yeah. I'll never forget when we were in the supermarket and we saw a guy take some money out of a band. He dropped two $20 notes and I picked it up

and I was just about to say, you dropped money. My mum just grabbed my shoulder and was like, shh, shh, shh. What's Dame? I was like, excuse me, sir. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. She just winds me in. I don't know if you, what you're saying,

that story. I don't know, like, yeah, now she'd be like, oh, you know, you shouldn't have taken that.

Like growing up, older things, just like coming home with things. She'd be like, where'd you find that? I'd be like, oh, I just took it.

She'd be like, no, no, no, no, no. Looking back on it, it all comes down to that one time. Yeah, she'd be like, where'd you find that? I'd be like, oh, I just took it. She'd be like, no! Looking back on it, it all comes down to that one time.

Yeah, she taught you. And we used that to get a family past the fantasy land, that place in Hastings that's Splash Planet now. Right, okay. My criminal endeavours, pay for our family to have a day out. I love it. Disgusting. Hey, but it was your finders fee.

Well, it was 100%. A 100% finder's fee. Alright, so 0800-966 Have you helped yourself to a finder's fee for finding something, or did someone help themselves when they found something of yours to a little finder's fee for their troubles? Alright, give us a call. Text in.

We're talking about if anybody's ever helped themselves to a finder's fee. If you've lost something and it's been handed back in, has someone already themselves to a finder's fee. If you've lost something and it's been handed back in, has someone already deducted a finder's fee? Because it does suck when you find something of somebody's and it's worth a lot of money, like a wallet that might have a lot of cash in it. You give it back and they're like, thanks for that. But see, I'd always think that someone would give you a little something back.

A little something, something. I wouldn't expect it, but it'd be nice, wouldn't it? See, I would expect it. You'd just take the money. I'd be like, I'd actually hold some money as a security bond. And then they say, oh, here's your reward, and I'll give them back. I'd be like, okay, and here's the money I was going to steal from you as my own reward if you didn't give me a reward.

Morgan's called through. Morgan, you took a find this fee? No, I didn't. My dad, he was at the Dunedin airport and dropped his wallet in the car park and went back to look for it. I couldn't find it. Then over the loudspeaker, his name got called out.

We went up to get the wallet from customer services and he had been relieved of $120. So they handed it in, but took some cash. Yes, they did. Did they leave any cash in there?

I can't quite remember. It was a few years ago. But he was actually on his way up to Nelson to pick up my new car for me and luckily he hadn't withdrawn all the money for that as well. Oh, yeah. Now, when you've got lots of money in your wallet, you kind of keep your hand on it the whole time. You check, check, check.

Money's still there, check. Money's still there, check. Awesome tapping. Thanks for your call, Morgan. Heather, what happened? So my dad was working in America, and he had gotten a whole lot of cash out to go, like, shopping for the family and whatnot. Left his wallet on the back of his ute when he went into the store.

And then some guy came in and said, oh, mate, I found your wallet. And, you know, oh, God, thank you so much. Very kind. Yeah. Then God got back to his ute, opened up his wallet, and his $500 notes had all been changed to $100. Wow. Yeah. So they would have taken probably, you know, $470

and swapped them all for one. Wow. Jackie. So he would have, like, without, yeah, I mean, that's Kind of clever Because He'd just look And see the notes right

Yeah Is it American money That's all the same size All looks the same Yeah All looks the same Yeah Yeah

You can't tell I don't want to arouse A suspicion until this guy leaves Yeah yeah I'm going to change These $100 bills For $1 bills That's so cheeky

That's so cheeky Pretty ballsy For the guy to come in and give it to him. Yeah. To like change the money and then also offer it up and be like, oh, maybe I found a wallet. But then he could just say, well, I just found this on the ground. Yeah, exactly. There's no evidence, is there?

No. Wow. Heather, thanks for your call. Some text messages at uni. I left my handbag in the computer lab. I ended up getting it back two weeks later after replacing all the cards. Heather, thanks. You're cool. Some text messages. At uni, I left my handbag in the computer lab. I ended up getting it back two weeks later after replacing all the cards. After all the cards had been replaced.

Sorry, I was hungry and I spent it on BK, but don't worry. I put the money back. That was the notes. Yeah, they felt so guilty spending my money, they waited until payday to give my wallet back. So that's why I was gone for two days. I spent the money. Oh, that's annoying, though, because you got all the cards and everything. I know. You get it back and there that's why I was gone for two days. I'd spent the money. Oh, that's annoying though because you got all the cards and everything.

I know. You get it back and there's like, I'm sorry, I'm riddled with guilt. Riddled with guilt. Another one, I dropped my wallet on a golf course in Lower Hutt. Yeah. Collected it from the Porirua Police Station.

It was apparently found at Wellington Airport. So that's done the rounds. Yeah. All the money was still in it, but my next free coffee card from Starbucks was gone. Oh, that's a good finder's fee. That's their finder's fee. I'd rather

have my wallet back and they can take a free Frappuccino. This one, I don't know if I believe, but it's a good yarn. My policy is never let the truth get in the way of a good yarn. My dog ran away when I was a kid. Someone around the road found him and helped themselves to a 100% finest fee

by keeping my dog. And to disguise my white bull terrier, they drew big black dots on it with a marker and tried to tell us and the police it was a Dalmatian. Easily proved. Just wash the dots off. And also, bull terriers look nothing like Dalmatians.

Dalmatians are like skinny leggy things. It's a Dalmatian bull terrier cross. Yeah, right, right, right. It'll rescue kids from fire by dragging them from the building by the face. Yeah. Can't you just go up to it and be like, Max, Max? Yeah, spray it with a hose and it's like, oh, oh. Gosh, even I was fooled as the dog with the dots on it.

I believed I was a Dalmatian. Science has done another weird study where they have got men to sniff women's armpits. So a whole bunch of guys were asked to sniff the armpits of 28 women. I consider that to be a trap. Hello there. We're scientists. Wondering how keen you are to sniff women. Strange women.

Not strange women. Women who are strangers to you. Strangers that happen to be females. And then if guys are like, yep, keen. Like, warning signs. He goes on a list. How quick he is to say yes. Yeah.

And how eager. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah. So this was in aid to find out how attractive men find a woman's body odor. Right. So they couldn't see the women. All they could do was sniff their armpits. All they got was the smell.

And the men universally agreed on who smelled more attractive. Now, they didn't have any fragrances on. This is purely on body odour. So the women who were the most fertile at the time, their body odour smelled good to men. So this is nature, isn't it? So if you're like... So that's during ovulation.

That would be your most fertile, right? Yeah. So during ovulation, don't wear deodorant. We learnt last week that you can't have a conversation with your dad for very long during your most fertile periods, but now you smell the best. So don't talk to your dad when you're most fertile. And don't let him sniff you.

Definitely not. Don't wear deodorant if you know that you're ovulating and you're single because that's when you will smell literally the most attractive to a guy. That's all primal stuff, eh? That's all like monkey stuff. But do you want to be, like Caitlin, do you want to be going on a date with no deodorant? Oh, sometimes I forget.

And has that accidentally worked in your favour? I can't remember. Because you've got to get your armpit in on the date, don't you? You'd have to get it in on the... Wear like a singlet top or something and just keep your arms flimsy. Go to a hot restaurant and sit with the fan behind you and them over the table, put your arms up like this. The gust will do all the work for you.

You just draw them in. It'll be like, you know, in a cartoon when someone smells a pie on the window and they start floating towards the fire. And they're like, yes. And their feet are up

in the air and they're like almost flying. It'll be like that. Yeah. And the breeze from the fan. It's purely because,

you know, we have more sex hormones when you're most fertile. So, and it comes out through like sweat. So if you're like most fertile

and you're sweating, you're going to smell attractive, so don't cover it up with something else. Like Nivea or Rexona. Or just like any kind of like perfume. I suppose for years, scientists have been trying to bottle that.

What makes that, you know? Oh yeah, that attraction. The pheromones. Like if Gucci bought out a pheromones parfum, you know? What? Parfum. Parfum. Wasn't that what it's called? Parfum.

Oh, parfum. Parfum. Parfum. No, parfum is the cheese. Parf-a-farm. What? Parmesan. Was that great?

Yeah, that's it. God, if you smell like that, you'd never get anywhere on a date. Oh, no. Parmesan, that stuff's manky. Is that the stanky cheese? Yeah, that's it. God, if you smell like that, you'd never get anywhere on a date. Oh, no. Parmesan, that's stanky. Is that the stanky cheese? Yeah, that's stanky. But so tasty. Oh, yeah, it's delicious.

But stanky. But stanky, yeah. Right. Okay. What cheese would you want to smell like? You wouldn't want to smell like a blue vein. Eat them. What took me so long to get into a blue cheese is the stank.

Yeah, that's stanky too. Oh, that's a tasty cheese. But an aged cheddar. What about a creamy brie?, that's stanky too. Oh, that's a tasty cheese. What about an aged cheddar? What about a creamy brie? Does that ever smell? No. Maybe. I eat it too quick

to smell it. Unless cheese is really stanky, I'm eating it too quick. Yeah, you'd be one of those processed cheese slices. Yeah, you'd be in a singular plastic wrap. I'm not a plastic cheese.

I'm not a plastic cheese. Yeah, you are. I'm more like a smoked hibarti or something. I unwrap you and fold you in half and you crack along the edge. Yeah, just make you into segments and then eat one at a time. Strip you off. So you just suck it out of the plastic wrapper. Yeah, yeah, because the bit always gets caught.

If you don't open the wrapper fully, it gets caught in the fold. You've got to get in with your teeth. An American time use survey has been conducted. Yep. A time use survey. Yep. Oh, no. So it studies what your time is being used for.

So this is in America, but it has a statistic about millennials, which I think lots of people are going to dine out on. Millennials spend 70% more time at home than the general population. That's good though. This doesn't surprise me. On the top end of millennials, I love being at home. I don't like being out. There's people there. That would be what most millennials say.

I don't know. I get enough of people online. Oh, yeah. No, I see. Yeah, but we have lots more fun things to do at home now. Like, more than any other generation. Well, they didn't have Netflix, did they? And, like, all the amazing video games, and we can stream and download.

I mean, unless previous generations went to, like, Video Easy and got, like, five for $10 weekly rent. On special on a Tuesday or something. That's the good stuff. Yeah. And you pick your time when you want to go out. So you're like on dating apps, you know, and you're going, so you used to go out to like meet people,

just trawl. Yeah. But now you're doing your trawling at home and going out on specific dates. Like you could go out for a coffee date as opposed to going out for five hours on a Friday night. Yeah. Right.

Going out Fridays and Saturdays looking for someone, you schedule a date. Wasn't there a teen pregnancy or an unplanned pregnancy stat that kind of was from the same idea? Is that younger people aren't just going out to a party in the hope of something happening. They leave the house with purpose. Right. You'd go to a party because there was nothing else happening and there was nothing to do at home. But now, you know, you can

socialise at home and when you leave the house, it's very purposeful. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. I just like everything about that. Yeah. And so many people, when you're out at a party, everyone's like, oh, I don't want to be the first one to leave, but we all actually just want to be at home

and be here. Yeah. This has been great to see you all in person but I can talk to you like online. Yeah. This is why I just ghost

and just leave. Yeah. Just sneak away. And as you say, video games, like you can't do that at parties. People call it unsocial.

My wife's like, Vaughan, turn it off. People are here. I'm like, why are they here? Can they leave please? Yeah.

Or they can sit and watch me play this. I think that would be their idea of a fun night out. Yeah. Okay. See, I don't think it's a bad thing. I know I can already see how it'll be. And you've got all your Uber Eats and your food deliveries as well. It's all coming to me.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Find a place to nest. Never leave the nest. Leave for work and that's it. Oh, if you can do that from home, do that from home too. We had a lovely weekend in the presence of a big old monga at the weekend. Monga Taranaki.

We hiked after we were down there for work on Thursday night, Friday morning. We strapped on packs, some of us bigger than others. Producer Caitlin, the lightest pack on the trip. You and the self-proclaimed lightest pack on the trip. And I was carrying half of Sade's stuff. Yeah, didn't Sade have a small pack? She had a very small pack. I was like a sexy mule.

Like they haven't seen a mule this sexy since the one that Mary rode on into Bethlehem with Jesus in her belly. Maybe say a sexy Sherule. Like, they haven't seen a mule this sexy since the one that Mary rode on into Bethlehem with Jesus in her belly. Maybe say a sexy Sherpa next time. Oh, like a Tenzing. Yeah, a sexy Tenzing. A sexy Tenzing. People look at me and they're like, there's a Nepalese. Who was your Hillary? Was I your Hillary?

I was going to say Charlotte. I was the Hillary. Oh, okay, right. I wanted to be serious. You can be Hillary. You can be Peter Hillary. No, I donade, it was the Hillary. Oh, okay, right. I wanted to be serious. Oh, you can be Hillary. Okay, fine. You can be Peter Hillary. No, I don't want to be Peter Hillary. You can be Hillary Barry. Okay, I'll be Hillary Barry.

Great Hillary. Find your Hillary. Hashtag find your own Hillary. So we hiked up on Friday, did a big leg on Friday, straight into the Holly Hut. If you've done that trek, that's past. How long is that? Like walking?

That was probably all up three, three and a half hours. Yeah, walking. With a break in between. Yeah, some breaks along the way. It's part of the Puakai Crossing, which is, it's up there with the Tongariro Crossing. It's beautiful. It's not as popular, but it was heaving on Saturday.

Yeah. Well, this is my second time and my first time actually seeing that the mountain exists up there because last time we were there, it rained the whole time. You didn't see the mountain one day. No. Yeah.

But this time did. Beautiful weekend. If you follow any or all of us on Instagram, you're probably sick of seeing the photos of that beautiful mountain. Yeah, you guys should have posted a photo. I was thinking about going for the Megan approach where it's more of just a close-up selfie with a blurred mountain in the background. Like, I went there, but check me out sort of situation.

But decided to include what we went there for. But on the way back down, so our second night, we were going to stay at the Puakai Hut. Now, this is, there's, a lot of places have these, what's the place in Ngāruahia called in Hamilton? The Rimetakas.

No, you said that 18,000 times. But everywhere's got this local... The Harry Mark and Madamers. No. Good try, though. Why did you ask Caitlin? Because she's been up it and she did nail the word the other day.

The Harry Madamers. No. The Harry Madamers. You're getting there. It's getting closer. But everywhere's got one of those fitness walks where people get to the top and they take a photo. So the poor guys, as you go to the top, you find the tarn.

If it's a nice day, you get a reflective photo in the mountain like we did. But on Saturday, it was a nice day and it was heaving. Like people were everywhere. We were the first of the huts under the advice of safety dad. We're going to get up early. After he polished off two bottles of scrumper, I'm pretty sure he was regretting that decision. I was.

We're going to get up early. He had the bottle of Chardonnay and half sure he was regretting that decision. I was. We're going to get up early. The bottle of Chardonnay and half a thing of whiskey. Well, I was cold. But classy. So we got to the hut early and claimed a room and we were very happy

with ourselves. And then, so that hut can sleep 16? Yeah. Then a group of 10 arrived and then another two arrived and then two more people arrived. Then a family of nine arrived. All another two arrived And then two more people arrived Then a family of nine arrived

All intent on staying the night in this hut I heard the words We'll just sleep on the floor Madness And they don't do Like a lot of huts do online bookings Which is great Because you want to know

That you're going to have a place to sleep But they don't do that They shouldn't You just turn up Yeah see this was another reason Why I didn't want to do it Because you said you're not guaranteed A bed at the end of the day,

like if the hut's full. If you get there early, you're pretty guaranteed. But these people were arriving late in the afternoon. Anyway, these kids arrived and they walked inside and I heard them come out and they said, Dad, there's no room. Little fella. Poor little fella.

And I was sitting there and I was like, don't offer me a bed. No one say anything. It's our room. I know, even I was like, oh God, we can't sleep in these beds if there are like, you know, kids. Families and stuff here. One of them says to their mum,

we walked all this way. I reckon when the parents were around the corner from getting there, they were like, alright kids, hut looks full, everyone put on their little puppy dog eyes, try to get a sympathy bed. So, after a little while, we were all standing outside and the hut was heaving and we all kind of looked at each other and someone said, oh, I wonder how much,

if we could get a last minute hotel deal on Expedia. Who was the one who said that? I can't remember. I think it was either Caitlin or Sade. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sade said it. He was having a joke about it. Yeah, Sade was like,

wouldn't that be funny if someone just looked? Maybe. And so I was like, oh yeah, I guess so. But I was on my phone already kind of late looking. And I'm like, got a pretty good deal here for six adults. Like $40 each. Before the sun goes down. Yeah, $40 each for a hotel bed.

So we made the decision it was happening. It went from a joke to actually happening pretty quickly. In the space of like five minutes. So we were like, guys, now's our chance. By the way, it was like four o'clock. Yeah, 4.30. So how long is the walk down? An hour and a bit.

We honked it down. But anyway, this was our chance. The daylight was fading. I said, all right, guys, it's time to be heroes. So I made an announcement. I bet you did. Everybody at the heart, if I could have your attention for a minute.

It has dawned upon us that there's not enough beds for everybody tonight. We had the pleasure of staying at the Holy Heart last night. Great Heart would recommend it at some stage. Now, a little while ago, some kids arrived. Great Heart would recommend it at some stage. Now, a little while ago, some kids arrived. Look at them. They walked up here, did a great little effort.

So we've decided. A great little effort. A great little effort. We've decided we're going to give up our beds. We're going to head down for the night. You could avoid it. Like. Did you start the clap? Is that you?

Yeah, I started my own clapping. And he's the only one clapping. Yeah, I'm the only one clapping. I'm like... For a while. Yeah. I'll stop now then if no one's going to join in. And they were like, oh.

And her mum said to me, thank you so much. He brought up his little motion camera. He's really hoping to get footage of a kiwi. And I like did that thing the condescending adults do where they kind of get down on their, they put their hands on their knees and they look at the kid, they're like, I hope you get a kiwi. And I, like, did that thing the condescending adults do where they kind of get down on their, they put their hands on their knees and they look at the kid, they're like, I hope you get that kiwi footage.

Be sure to send me a copy. Address it to greatest guy ever who gave up his bed for you at gmail.com. Just a wee transfer link. Don't try to send me the whole file. It'll never work. 25 megabytes. The thing is, the people in the hut were like,

oh, these are nice guys. But what had actually happened is we'd run out of alcohol. Yeah. And we were like, well, this sucks. If there's going to be this many people and it's going to be awful, we're going to need to be at... You definitely need an alcohol buffer.

Yeah, yeah. So we're walking down and Caitlin's cut because she's had a bottle of shardy. No, I had half a bottle of vodka. And then we were like, shit, we've got to get down the mountain. You're lucky to tumble down the mountain. Yeah, I know

so down we went and my god a shower and a hotbed for 40 bucks best money ever spent one of those mums often asks their house back in New Plymouth like to keep not just for the night to keep it meant that much I actually carry around the title indeed on my personal

son's overturn it meant that much. So I like to think there will always be the story in that family of those heroic trampers that on the verge of sunset decided to don their packs and go down the track to give those kids a bed. And you're welcome. And you'll be like, I'm definitely telling the nation about this on Monday.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And now because I believe I have, I can claim that hotel room back as a work expense. I believe, well, it has been a work story. It has. Hang on, we've all paid you, though, already. So then, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. No, that doesn't work.

Heroes need their rewards, Caitlin. And their tax refunds. Yes, they do. Yes, they certainly do. Receipts for GST purposes. Moosh Mondays. Yes, they certainly do. Receipts for GST purposes. Mosh Mondays. It's our inaugural Mosh Mondays.

It is. We talked about it. It came off the back of Flashback Friday. And we decided, well, that's more of an upbeat banger. We need something to reflect the moments that aren't all upbeat and banging. Yeah. And how did this start? We did a phone topic, didn't we?

You played Pink's Just Like a Pill. Megan opened up that that was her real teenage emotional song. Took her back. Here's It Now still takes her back to cleaning toilets. Cleaning toilets. Yeah, in a bar. And everybody kind of had one, apart from Robot Fletch, who had him programmed Winamp or Windows Media Player to make an emotional playlist.

So we asked you to get in touch with us over the weekend on our Instagram or you can DM our Facebook page, FBMZM, with your songs that take you back to that emotional time in your life and joining us for the first ever Mosh Mondays. Lauren, good morning. Good morning. Lauren, if you would do us the kind favour, please set the scene.

Okay. I was a foreign exchange student in the United States when I was 16. I discovered my first crush when I was at high school and he was just amazing. He was the track star and kind of a bit of a school jock. Lauren, Lauren, this is like an American high school movie. Yes.

She was a girl from small-town New Zealand travelling to find herself when she found the man of her dreams. So were you, like, popular? Were you, like, a cheerleader or, like...? No, not really. We sort of were quite special because we were foreign exchange students and no one understood

what we were saying coming from New Zealand. I know. Like we all speak English but they don't get it, do they? Wait, so was he a local? Yes.

He was from the same town. Okay. Okay. Yeah. So we went on a couple dates and I was like, oh, this is going to be my first kiss for the thing.

I was really excited. And he told me after a couple of dates that him and his family were about to move to Texas. And I was really upset. Oh, my God. This is the third act. This is the third act in that movie. And then you think it's all going to go well

and then the heartbreak, you know, becomes present. Okay, go on. So we met up for one last time and it was with him and his family and all of a sudden he pulled out this guitar and started singing this song. And since then I haven't really been able to listen to this song because it's a bit disappointing.

So was this the last time you saw him when he sung the song to you? Yep. The next day, him and his family packed up and moved to Texas. So this song was big at the time. Did he perform it well? Yeah, no.

He was actually a really good singer. Yeah. And it always reminds you of heartbreak for your first crush. A bit disappointing that, you know, it never amounted to anything for me. What's he doing now? Have you had a Facebook stalk? Yeah, I did.

He's married. Oh! Could have been you! Did you even get to kiss him? No. Oh! Did you even get to kiss him? No Are there lyrics in the song that really sting you? Well, yeah, because it kind of talks about being apart and being quite far away from each other

Yeah, it was kind of the song that everyone was re-enacting at the time sort of being apart and then being quite far away from each other. Yeah, it was kind of the song that everyone was re-enacting at the time. All right, well, Lauren, I think you've got to put us out of our misery and give us your song for Mosh Mondays. It's Hey There Delilah, and that's the Mason who broke my heart. Oh! It's our first ever Mosh Mondays. Arms in the air. Hey there, Delilah, what's it like in New York City?

I'm a thousand miles away, but girl, tonight you look so pretty. Yes, you do. Times Square can't shine as bright as you. I swear it's true. Hey there, Delilah, don't you worry about the distance. That is you. I swear it's true. Hey there, Delilah, don't you worry about the distance. I'm right there. If you get lonely, give this song another listen.

Close your eyes. Listen to my voice. It's my disguise. I'm by your side. Oh, it's what you do to me Oh, it's what you do to me What you do to me Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Plain White Tees Hey there Del Delilah. On ZM, it's the first ever Motion Monday. And we just talked to Lauren, who had that sung to her.

We just asked Lauren if he changed the name. Hey there, Lauren. No, hey there, Delilah. What's it? Like in Auckland City. You've just texted Lauren? Yeah, we're friends now. She said no, but that would have been funny though.

DeLauren, DeLauren. So many options there. That has so much more meaning now I know Lauren's story. It was so sad. I can imagine him sitting there singing it to her. I know, because I hate that song. You do hate that song. I hate it a little less now. If you have a song that you think would be great for Motion Monday,

register ZM online or go to our Facebook page, FBMZM, and send us a message in the inbox and you could be next Monday's Mosh Monday. Some text messages in. This Mosh Monday is already getting to me, having a cry on the way to uni. I'm really feeling for Lauren. Somebody else is sitting in the car with my sister on the way to our exams, bawling our eyes out. What got me was That he's married now

And she definitely stalked him Because she knows You can't expect the crush to Wait To wait forever I know, I know Someone said their carpool buddy Just started crying

He's a Nathan Not the same one But that was Mason, eh? Mason I thought she said Nathan It was a Mason Not the same one Somebody said it was Mason, eh? Mason. Mason. I thought she said Nathan. It was a Mason. Not the same one. Somebody said,

these are going to sting every Monday, aren't they? I'd say depending on how big a weekend you have, there'll be direct correlation to how much it's going to sting on the Monday. That's what I also love about most Mondays is everyone's a bit volney on Monday, aren't they? Want to talk now about curses. And some people really believe they're cursed

including Can you just suspend your disbelief for just three minutes? Okay. So Post Malone

he's had a terrible run of bad luck so he had a mid-year emergency his private jet had to make that emergency landing. Yep.

He had a car crash he got T-boned his Rolls Royce got written off very lucky to be alive in that serious accident. Then he his house was burgled he had a car crash he got T-boned his Rolls Royce got written off very lucky to be alive in that serious accident then he

his house was burgled by guys with guns so it was a like armed robbery is that what you call it? yeah so he wasn't home

none of this would have happened if he wasn't rich his curse is his money that's a curse right yeah well no he could have still got crashed into it's just

wouldn't have written off a Rolls Royce yeah it would have yeah. Well, no, he could have still got crashed into. It's just, wouldn't have ridden off a Rolls Royce. Yeah, would have ridden off a Toyota Corolla. He would have been at work. Well, some people have a different idea because he, in June,

was hanging out with Ghost Adventures star Zach Bargains at his haunted museum. So there is a particular object that is hidden by protective glass

and there is... Shut up. Is the three minutes of suspending disbelief up yet? No, it's not up yet. Who's this guy? Zach. What's his last name?

Zach Bagans. Yeah, B-A-J-A-N-S. Okay, I'm just Googling. It's in Las Vegas, so it's legit. Shut up. Because you know Las Vegas is totally legit. This is believed to be... I told you to just pause for a second.

The most haunted object. It's like a book or like a little case. Yeah. And so he took the protective case off it. And there's a video of him touching it. Post Malone's touching it. No. Zach's touching it.

And Post Malone's going, no, no, no, no, don't, don't. And they're just having a beer and having a laugh. But he's going, no, no, no, don't. And then as he's touching it, Post touches him. Oh, so he's touching the electric fence. He touched the curse. And that's when everyone now is saying that's the moment Post Malone was cursed. That started his run of bad luck.

And it did, because it was in June, and right after that was when the emergency landing took place. I mean, all could be put down to coincidence. There's some final destination shiz. This is the Dibbuck box. Yeah. One of the world's most haunted objects. You've got to be 16 or older to go to this museum,

and it costs you 44 US dollars. Dibbuck means malicious spirit. Right. Yeah, so he technically touched it. So yeah, he's had a really bad run of luck. So I thought we could take some calls on people who have also had a really bad run of luck. So I thought we could take some calls on people who have also had like a really bad run of luck. Maybe you believe that you're cursed.

Or you've just had like just a really bad few like period in your life where everything went wrong. That too. From a curse. Yeah. Okay, right. Well, yeah. You say that, but then everyone believes in psychics and medians.

Mediums? Mediums. Yeah, medians are the median house prices. Yeah. And the lines on the road. The median strips. Yeah, the median barriers. I believe in those because it's road safety.

Separating traffic. Yeah. Well, if these two promise to not ridicule you, or if you just believe that you just had a run of bad luck. I'd like to hear from people that have had a really bad run of luck. Like, if you bullet point what went wrong. Yeah, like your private jet nearly crashed, your Rolls Royce got T-boned, and then your mansion got burgled.

Well, I don't think we're going to be at that level, Megan. But yeah, hit us with your run of bad luck. Or maybe it's just, you know, for the average person, your flight got delayed, you were rear-ended, and you came home and your house had been broken into. That's kind of like your average person's... Yeah, that's much more attainable. ...version of personal life's luck, isn't it?

All right, well, 0800-DARLS-AT-M, 9696, list off your run of bad luck. We're talking about curses. Have you ever had a run of excessively bad luck? Well, no, I think we're talking about your run of bad luck. Yeah, because I don't believe in that. Rubbish. So none of us are allowed to.

Because Fletch does it. Well, when I see the proof. Scientific proof. The scientific proof of a curse. Then I'll... How do you know if a curse was a bacteria all along? Yes. That's where you get a bacterial infection,

but it's just a curse. It just affects your luck, not like a snotty nose. This is why I'm drinking kombucha. A lot of kombucha. It's good bacteria. Keep away the curse bacteria. There's no scientific proof

that kombucha is actually good. There's actually not. So we're talking about curses. And kombuchas, both of which are bullshit. So we want to know from you your string of bad luck when the bad stuff started happening and just didn't stop. Yeah.

Quite a few text messages in on it. Someone said, I'm in the middle of one of these at the moment. I'm in the middle of a string of very bad luck. Over the last three months, my granddad died. My dad had a stroke while traveling. And my mum and my brother live in Wilmingham, North Carolina, in line of Hurricane Florence. Jeez.

So there's a bit of bad luck our family's having it at the moment. It's not you, so you're all good. But they're experiencing it all around them. Yeah, right. But yeah, they've got to worry about it all. Some text messages. Somebody said, my string of bad luck was, I got Lego through the TV.

How the hell does Lego gather enough momentum to break a screen? Are you angry at something? Did someone toss a whole Millennium Falcon made of Lego once? I don't know. You know when something pressure hits like the TV and you get those funny colors? The dead pixels. Yeah. I was T-boned in my car.

All my kids got chicken pox, but the annoying thing was one after another, not all at the same time. Oh no. My grandma died. Oh my God. I got tonsillitis and my son has been sent to hospital with a mysterious lump.

Oh my God. Jeez. That's quite a string. That's quite a lot of bad luck That's not even, you know how they say it comes in threes. That's like seven.

Comes in sixes. Three lots of three. Geordie, what was your run of bad luck? So I recently went travelling through Europe and I was in Italy coming home and I was by myself because the rest of my family was still travelling.

And I was going into Milan City and coming home, I got on the wrong train and I can't speak Italian. So I got to the wrong train, wrong station, managed to make my way to the airport. Airport bus to the... Yeah, that's all good, you go, the airport bus to the hotel that I was staying at wasn't there for another hour, and it's about 11 o'clock at night, I only just managed to get the last one, then when I got on the plane from Milan to Hong Kong, got to Hong Kong, went to my gate, turns out it wasn't my gate, went to board and the flight attendant's going,

this isn't your gate, you need to go to your gate, it's last call, now go. And so I run to my gate, get to my gate and then once I get there, I get on the plane and I'm sitting on the plane and I realise I don't have my asthma inhaler and I'm convinced I'm going to die on this flight. And the girl in front

of me, who's this Australian girl, she turned around and she goes, hey, can I have my Ventolin and I was like oh you're my life I would look at that as like you had a string of like good luck good luck

near calls near calls yeah you got there did you die on the plane um almost okay cool

so the Ventolin but that's not a curse that's just you didn't leave enough travel time to get on your flight I knew it the minute you were like,

started doing that travel. Fletch is just like, this is poor organisation. I was sitting at my gate, okay, about an hour before the plane took off and I was meant to take off at 11.30 and then at midnight I'm thinking, this is taking ages. Like, why is this plane...

Poor planning. That wasn't a good after all. Poor planning. Always, you're like Vaughan, you don't respect the boarding time. Man! On the pass. It's a problem.

All right, thanks. You're cool, Geordie. Tess, your run of bad luck. Hi, yeah,'t respect the boarding time. Man. On the pass. It's a problem. All right. Thanks. You're cool, Geordie. Tess, your run of bad luck. Hi. Yeah, so it wasn't me. It's my mum. So she's got three daughters. I'm the third.

And over three years, one of my sisters got melanoma. The next year, my sister got breast cancer. And the next year, I nearly died giving birth to my daughter. Oh my God. Good Lord. Yeah. And it all went in sequence. So my older sister

happened to her first then my middle sister and then me. I'm the youngest. Jeez. And when I was in surgery the first thing mum said when they came to tell her

they didn't know if I was going to live or not she said, I think I'm cursed. Yeah. Wow. And now you're all said, I think I'm cursed. Yeah. Wow, that's terrible. And are you all okay now? Way to make it about yourself, Mum.

Mum's like, great, I'm sure. Mum, I'm nearly dying here. Guys, I tell you what, I'm cursed. So we're all okay. My sister's beat cancer and I'm alive. Oh, great. Amazing. Brilliant.

Again. You could almost paint that as like good, bad. Good luck. Bad, but then. Yeah, yeah, for sure. All right, Tess, thanks for your call. Somebody said, in the last two weeks, I've had cat number one get diagnosed with cancer.

That's cost over $5,000 so far. $5,000? For cat chemotherapy. Cat two is in the vets after a fight. That's adding up as well. Wife has strep throat and a week of high fevers. Child one has an ear infection and has had a week of over 40 degree fevers. Child 2 has had a viral infection

and fevers as well. It's fevers all through the household. Total visits to the doctor, vet, and emergency room no less than 15. Me, I'm fine. Although I have aged significantly in the last week. Some text messages. Somebody said they had 6 car accidents although I have aged significantly in the last week. God.

Some text messages. Somebody said they had six car accidents in six months, none of which were their fault. And they felt cursed. You'd be so frustrated. Even if in the middle you had one that was your fault, that'd be all right because you'd be like, well, that was my fault, but everything else was just everybody else's fault.

Are they hitting different parts of the car? Because if someone can hit the front of my car, the back's being done. Yeah, they could just work their way around all the damaged panels. Yeah, that'd be great. You can ring up the insurance company for the sixth time. They're like, is this your idea of a laugh? Great news.

Again, not my fault. So you guys wouldn't have to do much at all. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day Today's fact of the day And for the rest of the week This week's fact of the day is about New Zealand trailblazers Okay There's a series

The New Zealand Herald are running Called Trailblazers And it's profiling 125 trailblazing females from New Zealand. Because it's 125 years since New Zealand gave females the vote. First in the world. First in the world. First in the world. Yep, that's right.

The suffragette movement. If you've got a $10 note handy, pop a gawk at Kate Shepard there. Yep. She did the hard yards leading the suffragette movement Megan You kind of motioned To yourself there When Vaughan said

125 women are profiled When do I get Interviewed for this Is Megan being Interviewed for that Or are we talking about Actual like hard Hard work

What What Like What do you mean Actual hard work Well you know People that have done stuff Like getting the vote

And stuff Why What have you done? Apart from turning up at work every day like us. Wire on about like equal rights. You wire on.

Well, that's what people always text in. Oh, she's wiring on again. Oh, she's wiring on again. I will keep wiring on. I can't wait. I can't wait. And there'll be one.

And there'll be one and he'll be dealt with suitably. Yeah, go on. By all members of the show. I know exactly what you're going to say. Where's the week of facts about men in New Zealand who have done great things? We hear about

that every single day, don't we? Oh, there you go, wiring on again. Oh, wiring on. There she is. The man haters wiring on again. Today's fact of the day is that the first ever female firefighter in the British Commonwealth was in New Zealand. And her name is Anne Barry.

Yes. Anne Barry. Let me tell you a little bit about Anne. She was working in the control room for the Auckland Fire Brigade in the 70s. Yeah. And she was in her mid-20s and she's like, well, this is good. I want to be out there. When you said, I was thinking like this is going to be early in the 70s.

I know. And that shook me. I just assumed in World War II. Yeah. That, like, women took on lots of jobs that weren't until that time

women-friendly professions. Yeah. They just got it done because men were away. But no, this was in the 70s. So she wanted to be in the fire service.

She remembers the resistance of the woman joining the fire service. Quote, they weren't going to have fire station turned into beds of sin. They weren't going to have menstrual cycles on fire stations. And they didn't want women fainting at motor accidents. Jeez. So she's like, I'm in. I want in. They said, you're not allowed to be because you're

not tall enough. You're an inch too short. So she spent a year getting the height of every male serving in the New Zealand Fire Service to prove there were also heaps of men that were shorter than you. That were too short. That was totally an excuse.

Too short. So then she got another letter back saying that her left eye was slightly weaker than her right eye. So then she got the opinions of a second, third and fourth independent optometrist, all of which said

your eyes are absolutely fine. Okay. So she... Then what did they say? In 1978, it went to the Human Rights Commission. She spent three years finding it

until she was accepted into the recruitment course in 1981 becoming the first female firefighter in the Commonwealth

why would you want I'd almost want to prove them wrong and then be like oh sorry I could be in

the fire service but I'm not going to be because she had a genuine interest she genuinely wanted to do it

I mean that shows that she genuinely wanted to do it but then once I that shows that she genuinely wanted to do it, right? But then once she, I'd be like, once I get there, they're just going to be like awful to me. But she still. They probably were. Yeah. Go Anne.

Yeah. Well, she said for the first three years, she was forever trying to prove herself. And she was doing more work than them just to prove that she was capable of it. She retired from the fire service in 1999 after 22 years active service. Wow. That's such a great story.

And she's a Kiwi and she's she's a shit kicker. This is what the series should be called. S-kickers. Oh yeah, Trailblazers is the more like

friendly because old people like to read the paper and not be hit with swear words. Yeah. Sprint a version for young people

called shit kickers. Shack Kickers. Famous Shack Kickers. So today's fact of the day is the first ever female firefighter in the British Commonwealth was a New Zealander called Anne Barry. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. A flight was supposed to land in Wellington at 12.20pm from Melbourne. So MLB Arrow WGT. Is that right? Those are two, three-letter airport codes.

It was a Singapore Airlines flight. It never took off from Melbourne because the pilot, who had had one or two days layover in Melbourne, failed the alcohol test. It's amazing. So they've got these checkpoints in the sky now, Megan. And they stop the plane and they do a breathalyser. Was he already flying the plane?

Yeah, he was up and they pull alongside him in the police plane and they hang out the window and they're like, blow into this. Nah. They've got every plane's got, you know when you drink drive too much and they've got that thing you have to blow into it and then that frees up your car and you can turn on your key? You ever seen that? Residuous drink drivers when they get their license back.

They go, and then it's like, like Ding And then you can turn your car on Every plane is fitted With one of those So Yep If they've got any alcohol In their system They can't fly

Can't they just give Their co-pilot Blow on this Loophole But that's very naughty One of the passengers is like Can you just come up To the cockpit for a second

Bing bong Hey Cizay What's up This is the captain I'm pretty keen To get going But Has anybody not ever Had anything to drink yet Just come up to the cockpit for a second. Bing bong. Hey, what's up? This is Captain. Pretty keen to get going, eh? But has anybody not ever had anything to drink yet? I'll give you a tour of the cockpit.

Just put your hand up. We're going to nurse to come bring her. I mean, a mayor steward to bring her up. Don't know why I said nurse. That was weird, eh? Whether at their destinations, yes, whatever. Quick, just put your hand up. Come up.

See? We'll get going. Cool. And then. Oops. And then. Yeah, mean. Mean. Okay, that works.

Okay, buckle in. Hard out. Hard out, buckle in. I thought the pilot said buckle in, hard out. Buckle in, hard out. Hard out. Hard out, buckle in. Imagine if a pilot said, buckle in, hard out. Buckle in, hard out. Hard out. Hard out. If you're in the toilet, get out of it.

Because I'm going to have to pin up, make up this time. So they haven't said how drunk he was, though, because they do random inspections, don't they? Yeah, it's completely random. So you don't know when you're starting your flight, your day as a pilot or whatever, they could just come onto the plane and say... Oh, you said they blow into the thing.

Oh, no, I thought you caught on. That was a lie. It was a lie. Yeah, that was a lie. Oh, no, I thought that was legit. It does seem like a good idea. Yeah, they shouldn't be doing it randomly. They should check every pilot.

Although sometimes they do it if there's been a complaint, like, I don't know, your pilot walks past and he smells like bodies. And he walks in and he's like, is this the front or the back? I need to go to the point again. Because when I came on, I turned around to check something and then I turned back around

and I'm like, but... Or like flops on the seat beside you. And he leans down and he's like, how poor are you? Because I have to go past the rich people to get in my seat. You smell a little bit poor. I'm going to go back this way.

Oh my God. Yep, there's, I found the rich people, thanks. Cheer boy. So they haven't said how, they haven't said How drunk he was They don't have a

Breath limit No But just failed the test But enough to not fly Crazy I know And everybody put out A lot of people coming

Flying in to watch The All Blacks game Which was in Wellington That night Would have rather Stayed in Melbourne A night to be honest After that result

ZM's Fletch Vaughan And Megan The podcast For more Check out ZM online ZM