ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - September 26 2019

Episode Date: September 25, 2019

Chelsea Handler is on the phone ahead of her NZ tour, It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas and the secret hacks your partner does not know about.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music lives here. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Thank you, Anya. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The ACT in Australia is at the top, but we're like Darwiners. No, no, no. Where's ACT? It's Canberra. It's that little dot between New South Wales and Victoria. Oh.

That's where Canberra is. Right. The Australian Capital Territory. Right. So you can grow. They sell. There's reasons to go there. Previously, it was fireworks.

It was the only Australian state where you could purchase fireworks. But they banned that, didn't they? Did they? I don't know. So now you can smoke weed and shoot off fireworks. So you can grow your own and possess enough for personal use. What you got there? No, it's just some fireworks. The trick would be running a youth hostel and having 50 people staying at a time so then you can have a hundred plants

and just be like, if they ever raid you, be like, that's theirs. They planted them, yeah. They've been here for 12 to 15 weeks cultivating that. They're banned elsewhere but they're legal in the ACT on the Queen's birthday long weekend. Yeah. They were banned in 2009 but yeah, before in the ACT on the Queen's birthday long weekend. Yeah. They were banned in 2009. But yeah, before that, you could buy them all the time, couldn't you? But there was another thing people went there for.

Fireworks. Parliament. Parliament. No, fireworks, it was fun things. It wasn't Parliament. Oh, right, something else. It's adult material. Adult something.

Maybe it was something to do with that? Yeah, right. The only problem is, like, you're. Is it adult material? Adult something? Maybe it was something to do with that? Yeah, right. The only problem is, like, you're allowed to grow two plants. You've also got to go in the garden in Australia. Oh, it's crazy. No way I'd garden in Australia. In your wardrobe. Hydroponic.

Yeah, you just grow them in the conservatory. Like houseplants. Oh, you can't keep a houseplant alive. I know, I can't. That'd be so funny if it legalised here and you're like, I might grow a plant. We'd all be like, good luck. You ring up, you're like, hi, drug dealer. Another one died.

Can I please have another one? You ring up King's Plant Barn. Can you give me, I just can't keep my marijuana alive. And they're like, oh, we don't really speak about that. And you said, but in the ad you said, everything you need. Yeah, maybe not for you., but in the ad you said, everything you need. Yeah, maybe not for you. No. Maybe not for you. Alright, the top six coming up on the show.

Sad news for the regions and people that travel regionally. Jet stars dropping out of your regional markets and that could probably mean a price hike. Anya's pissed, aren't you? Because you wanted to book your Christmas flights to Nelson. I've already booked them. They're all locked and loaded

and now I'll have to swim. They cancelled on you. Yeah, I got this email yesterday like, oh, we're not 100% sure this is going to happen, but would you like a refund? So if enough people get refunds, they're like,

wow, we'll just refund everybody then. Certainly seems that way. Right, right. way right Air New Zealand did come out and say if you email them with your Jetstar ticket

they'll give you a deal it's good of them so get on to that oh I have they haven't replied yet though oh right so they have a few emails

you're all over it all over it aren't you I am I'm ready good alright well the top six can we go joining us on the show

like our own little Greta Thunberg. How is she Greta Thunberg? She's taking it into her own hands. She's being proactive, not reactive. So all proactive females are now Greta Thunberg? Young, proactive millennials, female or not. Okay. We'll be Greta Thunberg.

Special guest joining us on the show. She's taking a plane and that's kind of... Excuse me. Oh, yeah. You should really be... Maybe sail a boat. Just make sure you offset your carbon emissions. You're a white kid that grew up on the North Shore of Auckland.

You must know how to sail. I do, but I don't want to. She does, exactly. Does that weird you out when you move to Auckland for the first time and all these white kids that grew up on the shore and you had to sail boats? And you're like, why? Yeah, I blame the America's Cup. Yeah, well, we did it at school.

Why? Joining us on the show just after 7 o'clock this morning, she's in the country in a couple of weeks with her stand-up show. Chelsea Handler. She's got a new doco on Netflix as well that we need to talk to her about. About white privilege. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time.

All right, three news headlines. As usual, we're only allowed to pick one of the three. The others are deleted forever. Headline one, Dad under fire. Headline two, man checks out of hospital, only to need hospital again. Headline three, holy guacamole. Those are your three headlines. Choose one.

Holy guacamole. Or dad under fire, or man checks out of hospital, only to need hospital again. Holy guacamole. Because you love hospital again. Holy guacamole. Because you love avocado. I love guacamole. I would eat it with almost every savoury meal. I would eat guacamole as a side dish.

Right. I could easily do that. Yeah, it's yummy. Just lunch, little bowl on the side, dinner. What about a bangers and mash? Yeah, I reckon it would go great with sausages. It just goes well with anything. I'm trying to think of something that really wouldn't work with.

A savoury. Yeah. I mean, you need to win Lotto to have avocado all the time, 24-7. Yeah, that's true. Or live on an avocado orchard. That would help. Also true. Also, that would be great.

That would help. Well, an argument involving an avocado has wound up sending a 56-year-old woman to jail. The 72-year-old woman identified with, there was two women living together, a 72-year-old and a 56-year-old. According to the 72-year-old woman, identified as the victim by the police department on September the 13th, she was apparently watching television on the couch when her 56-year-old roommate got upset because she allegedly ate all of the sliced up avocado in the fridge.

The 72-year-old woman said that the 56-year-old woman yelled about the missing avocado before the 72-year-old woman showed her the middle finger. Can I just stop? You shouldn't slice avocado before you need it. Because they'll go brown. Yeah, leave it in its shell

with the stone in it. Yeah. They've just, in this article, just gone on to explain what an avocado is and then also... And then... How do they describe it?

An avocado. So it's like, it stops there. She rips the middle finger and then it breaks into two paragraphs explaining what an avocado is and what the middle finger is. Good. Do you want those? Yes. Okay. Not so much I want them, I need them. An avocado is a pear-shaped fruit with a green skin

and a large seed in the middle that grows on trees known as alligator pears. Avocados are high in monounsaturated fat and feature prominently in guacamole. Displaying the middle finger typically is interrupted as a derogatory, interpreted as a derogatory gesture. It can be made with the right or left hand and is often used and often escalates a situation.

In contemporary parlance... What is this paper? The gesture is called the bird and is paired with the verbs flip, flick, shoot or give. Is this a paper that's distributed to those lost tribes of the Amazon who just don't know what anything is? It's the TC Palm. I don't know what the...

Treasure Coast Newspapers. Oh, that sounds like a retirement heavy. Port St. Lucie. So I don't know if that's... Maybe it's Florida. Well, anyway, we get back into the story. The 72-year-old woman said that while she was on the couch, her roommate threw something at the wall behind her

and also hit her in the face. Police found a green substance that looked to me avocado remains on the wall. Evidence. Did they circle it and take photos? Yeah. So they took her away. She's been charged with, yeah. The avocado plays a small role in the history of the rock and roll band Led Zeppelin.

What? A poster of a large avocado with two eyes was used in advertising concerts by the band in April 1969. Get real. I didn't know that. Okay, that's an interesting fact. But they put that in the middle of the story as well. They really,

I feel like this is some intern needing to fill space for the news story. Like it was only going to be a paragraph. Show off writing prowess. Yeah. Here's the Led Zeppelin avocado poster. Ooh. Brilliant. It's the Led Zeppelin avocado poster. Ooh. Brilliant.

It's good, isn't it? It's great. Also, in that description, they described them as green-skinned, but not always. Not always. I'm more familiar with the purple-skinned. Haas avocado. Yeah.

No, those green ones freak me out. And they're already ripe, but they're green. The green ones? Yeah. Yeah. That's weird. But those ones are smaller, is it? Our trees, one of our trees is one of those.

And they're harder to tell when they're ripe because they stay green and they're not... No, so they stay, avocados stay ripe as long as they're on the tree. They don't start ripening until you take them off the tree. The longer you leave them on the tree, the more oily and... You know if you get a dry avocado sometimes?

You know every now and then you get an avocado and it's not as smooth as an oily, maybe a bit fibry? Yeah, right. Somebody told me those are the ones that are like picked from the tree out of like desperation to keep something on the shelves. I don't get those at the supermarket because I give mine a real good thorough going over. And if my finger goes through one, I'll just roll it back over and put it to the side Oh you're not the only person that does that I am yes Studies been done as to when people feel

Financially mature as in what age For each sex And it does vary between the two sexes Okay So for Well the average age for financial maturity across everyone is 31. What constitutes financial maturity? Is it beyond financial independence?

It's, so they've actually got a couple of parameters. Is one of them when you call your dad, Megan, and say, Diddy? Yeah, I think that's a sign of maybe not financially mature. Diddy, please. Hi, Diddy. Diddy. Hi, Diddy. And he's like that's a sign of maybe not financially mature. Diddy, please. Hi, Diddy. Diddy. And he's like, how much do you need?

You can call mum too sometimes if dad says no. Dad doesn't often say no. So you would say that's not financially independent or mature? Well, I'm smart about it. Like if the bank's giving money, why would you not take it? Yeah, fair call. No, so apparently the sign of maturity, financial maturity, is having a pension plan. But that's like KiwiSaver, right?

Yeah, so you have to get one of those. Your first job. You have to opt out, right? Yes, I mean, technically that's a weird... I would have thought it would have been like your debt level or not having four credit cards. Staying out of overdraft is another parameter people see. I remember, it took me so long to pay off my overdraft.

Just because it's always there. It was an uphill battle. It's always there, so you just... And then you pay off your overdraft, and then you get a mortgage, which is just like the biggest overdraft imaginable. Do you have to ask for an overdraft, or you've just spent more money than you have? I feel like they give you one when you're a student,

and that's how you're just locked into this ever. When I was a student, the student account came with the no questions, ask $500 overdraft. Yeah. And then you'd get, I don't know if they were monitoring it or not, but they were like, hey, mate, I know you're like skirting around the bottom there. Do you want $1,000? And you'd be like, free money?

Yeah. Because it was interest free because it was a student account. But it was when you stopped being a student that they came for their interest. Right. Yeah. So those are the parameters. Now, 31's the average between both sexes,

but when you break it down, men typically feel in control of their money at 29. Okay. And women feel in control and financially mature at 33. It's probably because you guys get paid more,

so, you know. Guys get paid more so they feel more secure at an earlier age. I mean, we spend more secure at an earlier age. I mean. But we spend more. On what? Ladies.

Yeah, that's why there's a gender pay gap because we spend more on the ladies. Do you? You benefit. So spend it on the ladies. Oh, no, you bought me a coffee yesterday. Did you buy that or did Ross Boss buy that? Ross Boss. Hey, but he's a man.

Last time I checked. Yeah, I was like, I made out like I was buying them. And he yelled across the cafe, Megan, what do you want? Yeah, textbook Fletch.

Yeah. And then Ross was like, I'll get it. I'm like, okay. Oh, here you go, Megan. And then Fletch was like,

I'll carry it. Ross was like, oh, that's good of you. Fletch was over, he's like, there you go, mate. Implying allletch is like, I'll carry it. Ross is like, oh, that's good of you. Fletch is over. He's like, there you go, mate. Implying all the way. Didn't cost me a cent to be the nice guy. Take back that thing.

Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. You, sorry. The government has announced there's going to be a beverage container return scheme. You might be thinking, what that? Well, that is where you return the bottles that you've drunk a beverage from for some cash money. Between 5 and 20 cents

when you recycle plastic drink bottles. I remember collecting cans when I was a kid, and we've talked about this. Calco cash for cans. Yeah. Kids for cans or whatever it was called. And you'd fill it with a little bit of sand, maybe some junk iron, you know, just to make the weight a bit heavier and get more cash. I remember doing it, but you had to squish the cans.

Yeah, you'd squish the sand in the cans. But if you had heaps of them, yeah, if you had, like, sacks of them, they couldn't check every individual can. Then you'd get away with it. But it was that sort of thing that ruined it for everybody else. Oh, yeah, Bourne. Because when they melted it down, it contaminated it, didn't it? Yeah.

Something like that. And I remember when I was really little, and places in Australia do this, or is it South Africa you see on bottles? SA. It's South Australia, isn't it? South Australia, yeah, because South Africa call themselves the RSA.

Oh, right. The Republic of South Africa. But yeah, bottles will always say five cents in SA. And you'd always be like, and I remember, yeah, I think way back in the day in New Zealand we did this, but then stopped when I was a little kid. I can't ever remember it happening for plastic and glass. I only ever

remember the cash for the cans. Glass, when I was growing up, reusable glass was always the swapper crate bottles. Yeah. Everyone drank those swapper crates and you'd take them back. But plastic, glass and aluminium drink or aluminum for our American listeners. Drink containers are going to be carrying a

refundable deposit. So basically it goes on to the production costs and then you get between 5 to 20 cents per recycled item at a recyclable point. So I wonder where those points are because I was just showing Megan some videos in Europe, all around Europe,

I've seen these in supermarkets. They have these little machines and you take your bottles in to recycle. You pop them in, it scans them, sucks them in and then gives you a receipt. And I'm pretty sure you can spend that at the supermarket you're in. Right.

Because you could have those machines at like a countdown and scan your OneCard and then just get it as a credit on your OneCard. As a deduction. Yeah. Yeah. Or just...

When you go to the supermarket. It spits you out a receipt. You know when you cash out the pokies? You've got like $2.10? Spits out one of those with a barcode. And then you take it up and you cash it in. So I wonder if they'll use machines like that. Yeah.

Because it's going to be easy to use machines that are already made. That already exist, right? Yeah, technology that exists. Yeah, that kind of thing. It's good though because we get people cleaning up like. Yeah. Because that's what we do with cans. And you know, you might think, oh, well, I'm not going to do it for five cents,

but somebody will take that happily off you. Oh, you're 100. For a massive collection. Like kids, like schools will start doing it for five cents, but somebody will take that happily off you. Oh, you're 100. For a massive collection. Like kids, like schools will start doing it for fundraising. Well, that's what we did when we were looking for cans when we were kids. We'd just go around the parks and just collect them all. It was all money. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All adds up. Yeah. It's a good idea. Good idea. Get those bloody kids off the fortnight and go out there collecting the cans so they can buy the new doo-wop skin for the fortnight. Make them earn their money. Tax-free money.

Like the good old days. Nutella is made by Ferrero. So Ferrero is an Italian manufacturer. They make Nutella, Ferrero Rocher. I was just going to say, is it the same thing? Kinder Surprise even. Ooh, okay. A bunch of products.

And there is talk that they may be taken off the shelves over allegations that they're using child labour. What, to fill the little jars? To pick the hazelnuts, I believe. So children as young as 10 are working up to 10 hours a day on hazelnut farms in Turkey for a daily rate of 26 New Zealand dollars. And the majority of the hazelnut pickers are Kurdish migrants. It's an ethnic minority group living predominantly in the poor south

and east of Turkey. I always remember hearing that ethnic group heaps on the news growing up because they were in Iraq. Do you remember that? In the Iraq war, it was always Kurdish to the north. Yeah. So in Australia, the Woolworths who owns Countdown in New Zealand said that they're looking into the report

and potentially they're going to pull the products off the shelves. Now, Ferrero saying there's no suggestion that that's going to happen, but we haven't heard, like, a defence from them at the moment. Oh. Yeah. So, what, stock up just in case they do? No. Oh, no, don't, because you'd be supporting, of course, yeah.

We need to all look into this. So stop until they remedy it. Pause until we can confirm that they're not, yeah. Until it's been remedied. So they haven't come out and said it's not true? No. Yeah. They've said that they don't tolerate child labour in any form.

Um, but is that a denial? They said the hazelnut supply chain is very complex and involves many stakeholders. I'm sure they mean... Oh, so they're saying they don't tolerate it, but this could come from someone before their... Down the chain. Right.

Yeah. Well, I mean, they get the hazelnuts. Like maybe they've never looked into the picking process. I'm pretty sure they would have. And if they said they didn't, I think they might be telling facts. Yeah. Right. Sad.

This is awkward, isn't it? I know. I'm all kind of sad. What about that, the rip-off one? The nutty, nutty spread spread That's hazelnuts I'm probably getting the hazelnuts from the same place From the same people

This is a hazelnut issue It's so hard to be so ethical in this world now Don't we get hazelnuts from the same Like Turkey and New Zealand We don't have our own Source of hazelnuts that would Be enough to Keep up with all the nutty spread we eat. Right.

Okay. So we need to just not get our hazelnuts from turkey right now? Just trying to think of a nutty alternative. Peanut butter? Peanut butter? Yuck. Can we put some Milo in our peanut butter and stir it? Oh my God, Milo peanut butter.

Do you remember when there was that peanut butter thing? Nobody does that. There was. Do you remember there was a peanut butter that came in, like, the late 90s, early 2000s, and it had chocolate swirl through it. And another one had, like, a grape jelly swirl through it. Yeah, I don't want a swirl. I want all my peanut butter to be chocolatey.

You could just get a knife in the minute you got it and just go healthily through the swirl. Right, okay. And mix it all in. Oh, okay, that sounds yum. I actually want to try that. Nothing stopping you from doing that. The top six is next.

The top six is next. From Nelson with the Picks peanut butter. Surely we can make some sort of... Yes. A collab. A collab. Some sort of joint venture. Get it done.

From the ZM Think Tank, this is the top six. Yesterday it was announced that Jetstar will be pulling out of the regions of New Zealand. Apparently 20,000 passengers affected with bookings already. Yeah, Anya was one of them. She had to rebook her Nelson holiday. So just the high cost, I'm imagining not enough people are going on the planes, right? Well, yeah, they said they were losing money.

Yeah. So Qantas, their mum is like, no, no, no more money. Come back home. Yeah, you come home now. Come back to mama. You come back. Well, you can keep doing the ones that are making you money. It is sad.

But bring your little planes home. It is sad because there were like 70 jobs and they've said that they'll redeploy those people within the Qantas network. Yeah. So if I was like check-in staff, I'd be like, can I be a pilot? So like, thanks.

Is that how it works? I don't think that's how it works. Nah, not always. I'll move to Sydney, I'll be a pilot. Is that not how it works? No. Oh, okay. Nope.

Right. No, sir. So they obviously, Air New Zealand, continuing to service, okay. Nope. Right. No, sir. So they obviously, Air New Zealand continuing to service the regions. Right. And Chatham Air. Yep. I believe that's how it's said. Well, I refuse to say it any other way.

They shouldn't have put an H in the middle if they wanted me to say Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. The H does serve a purpose.

Chatham. Chatham. Chatham Islands. Okay. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham. The H does serve a purpose. Chatham. Chatham. Chatham Islands. Okay. Chatham Islands. Yeah, they do a few regional flights. Yeah. So I've got the top six airlines that could service the regions.

Okay. Because that's what a lot of people are saying. With no competition, price is likely to go up. Yeah, right. Number six, the Putty Putty Brum Brum Airlines. They're very old planes. They're the type that the guy at the front's got to go, and spin the propeller and it goes,

black smoke pours out. But cheap. Really? I don't know about that. And you have to fly really low to the ground. Yeah. Exciting. Well, you get to see everything a bit better. Right. Sometimes I think they're flying low to the ground. Yeah. Exciting. Well, you get to see everything a bit better.

Right. Sometimes I think they're flying those jets too high. Okay. Right. You can't. You're flying over your home region. You want to point out your, like, parents' house, but you can't because you're too high.

Not a problem with putty putty brum brum airlines. Number five on the list of the top six airlines that could service the regions This airline's called Your Mate's Dad that owns a Cessna Airlines Oh, okay You know

that friend whose dad's like I don't know got a death wish or something and he loves flying his Cessna Yeah He loves this airline

because he's getting his hours up Yep It's expensive though because you're paying for gas Yeah, true. And no onboard snacks or anything. And it's loud. Basically

it's the stink version of putty putty brum brum airlines. Number four on the list of the top six airlines that could service the regions, Drone Air. Basically a flock of drones will pick you up and carry you there. But you need to stop every 10 to 15 minutes to change all the batteries.

It's going to take a while to get to Wellington. But you there. Yeah. But you need to stop every 10 to 15 minutes to change all the batteries. Okay. It's going to take a while to get to Wellington. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, cool. Yeah. Pretty cool using technology. What if you hit a seagull?

You're going down. Well, hopefully only one of your drones goes down, but you might have to land and change your blade, Megan. Right. Number three on the list

of the top six airlines that could service the regions, Air Hot Air Balloon Air. Okay. It's not the fastest airline airlines that could service the regions, air, hot air, balloon air. Okay. It's not the fastest airline, and you're at the beck and call of the wind, but, you know, if you catch the right northerly, you could probably make it from Wellington to Auckland, maybe. Or you land in the ocean and die.

Maybe. Very Instagrammable, though. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. Yes, good call. Social media hotness. Well, actually, you'd probably be freezing in the other. Yes, good call. Social media hotness. Yeah. Well, actually, you'd probably be freezing in a hot air balloon

flying that far. Number two on the list of the top six airlines that could service the regions, harness some seagull airlines. It's in the title, but basically you

need heaps of little tiny seagull harnesses. Okay. And then you catch the seagulls and you harness them. How many do you need? Lots. Have you read that James and the Giant Peach book?

That was a significant, that was a very heavy peach. That would be a heavy peach. That was a hugely heavy peach. A lot of water in that peach. And a giant caterpillar. But they needed a lot of seagulls. So I'm imagining heaps. And number one on the top six airlines that could service the region today

is one of those parachute lawnmower on your back situations. Right. You know those ones where they, my cousin does this. Really? I don't know if he doesn't like his family or something, but. Yeah, he jumps off. He sits on a hill. Yeah.

And he starts the lawnmower on his back. Oh, my God. And he revs the hell out of it. And then he just kind of like walks off the hill. And then the parachute, poof, and then he's away. Madness. Yeah. Absolute bloody madness.

But that is a possibility if you live in the regions. Yeah. And you want to chief. I would personally love to see an Emirates A380 land. And then in behind it comes a little lawnmower with a parachute. And then you have to get out of the way before the 747 lands, and you're sucked into the engines. Yeah, you want to get the hell out of the way with your little parachute situation there, champ.

That is today's top six. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. And we are joined on the phone this morning by Chelsea Handler. Good morning. Hi there. How are you guys? Good, good, and excited to have you coming back to New Zealand just a couple of weeks away, actually. Were you here, what, a few years ago with your last show? Yeah, I came there on my last book tour.

And that was the last time I'd done stand-up or written a book or wrote a book. I thought I'd wait and I just kind of got burned out. And I thought, you know what? Let me wait until I actually have like a story to tell and something important to say. So I feel like I do. I wrote my book and I just my new documentary on Netflix was just released. And so it's kind of a new phase for me to share my story about trying to go to therapy at 40 years old and failing miserably at it. So it took a little bit to stick. And it's just kind of the trials and tribulations of trying to become a better person a little bit later. How does one fail at therapy? Well, you know, you kind of make some progress and then you go right back.

You meditate for 20 minutes and then you end up getting into a fight with a six-year-old child at the supermarket. But they deserved it. Things like that. Yeah, things like that. Having to sit on the plane next to a Trump supporter and actually not have veins throbbing out of my neck.

You know, those kinds of tools that I was lacking. And were you excited to hear the news that the Democrats are going to launch an investigation to impeach Trump finally? I don't know if I'm excited. I mean, I feel like we should have impeached him such a long time ago. But I don't know. Yeah, at this point, we have to.

It's just so unethical and immoral. And he's, like, ruining our planet in the meantime. So more than anything, yeah, I mean, he's just such a stain on the history of America. That's why I'm so excited to come to New Zealand so I can leave this stupid country. Do you think maybe you could shop around for some real estate while you're here? Would you consider living in New Zealand? Who knows? Maybe.

Yeah. Maybe. Do I do that on the South Island or the North Island? Well, I'm from the South Island, so I would say South. Beautiful mountains, like Queenstown and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it kind of feels like you guys are going to have an influx of population there. Yeah, that could actually go against us, couldn't it?

You know, it's awful here. Yeah, terrible don't come here um tell me about hello privilege it's me chelsea it's your doco on netflix it looks so uncomfortable like what a position to put yourself in well i didn't really i thought white privilege was always like something that was related to rich families, people who went to like Harvard or, you know, Princeton or the Rockefeller family or like, you know, things like that. I didn't realize that, you know, in this world, it's a privilege to have white skin. You get away with more. You can, you're having, it's an advantage. You know, when you get pulled over by the police, it's not a life or death situation when you're white.

And I thought it was time for white people to start having the conversation about white privilege because it's a white person's problem. It's not black people's problem. So I thought, you know, I wanted to use my platform to do some more good than just, you know, collecting paychecks and talking about nonsense. And I thought that was a great place to start. And, you know, and it turned out to be, you know, a very riveting conversation because so many people really don't believe that white privilege is a thing. And those people are uneducated. What is the thing that stuck with you having filmed that? And you've spoken to so many people. What's one thing that's really stuck with you since filming it?

Stuck with me? Just the amount of like, you know, it's up to us. It's up to white people to do more work, to have uncomfortable conversations. You know, what's stuck with me is that people don't want to be uncomfortable. And the minute they think they have to admit that there's a privilege that goes along with their lifestyle, then they think they have to give something up. So between the book and the documentary, you know, I needed a laugh and turning my tour into stand up with something I didn't want to do until I had a message. And so it's been like it's been a perfect kind of way to balance all the, you know, kind of more serious stuff I'm doing with comedy because that's where I'm from. And that's my main kind of mode of operation is to be ridiculous and funny.

So it's nice to get serious with some stuff too. Awesome. It's a great message. Yeah, looking forward to it. Auckland Town Hall, Wednesday, October 9th, just a couple of weeks away. And you can grab all the info tickets at livenation.co.nz.

We'll see you in a few weeks. Chelsea Handler, thank you so much. Okay, thank you. Bye-bye. ZM's Fletchvorner Megan The podcast There's a A ruling in a German court

That is very interesting If you've got a hangover This morning And you're struggling With the fact that You have to go to work On a Thursday Yeah

First of all I want to cover up The fact that the Germans Have an official Medical term For a hangover Do they? Yeah

I've got it here I can play it for you. Oh, okay. You've got it. Yep. Actual audio. Yeah. No.

Yep. It's one of those ones where it might... No. It's my coordinate word. Visalgia. Visalgia. Visalgia. Visalgia.

That was only in one ear, though. Yeah, that's life, though, mate, so deal with it. So, visalgia, it comes from the Norwegian word kjevis, which is uneasiness following debauchery, be it guilt or being sick, and the Greek word algia is pain.

So it's a painful uneasiness following debauchery. And the symptoms include headache, nausea, and light sensitivity. We've all been there. After drinking alcohol. We've all been there. After drinking alcohol. We've all been there. So it has been ruled in a German court, and this came about because a company was selling anti-hangover shots.

Right. They were saying that if you had a hangover, you could buy this powder and mix it in with water or a shot and drink it, and it would get rid of your hangover quicker. The holy grail, isn't it? I mean, I don't believe any. Do you believe any of those hangover cure? No, not really. You've got to wait it out, hydrate.

Yeah, lots of water, electrolytes. Panadol. A couple of panties. Yeah. But that's just plastering over the rot, isn't it? You've got to get in there and sort yourself out at some stage. Yeah. Well, they claimed they were offering these anti-hangover shots

and they said they were making health claims. Right. So the company selling them said, well, a hangover isn't an illness. It's more of a temporary situation. So they could get away with it. So we're not making health claims. We're just claiming that we can help you get over this temporary issue quicker. Right.

And to which the other lawyers came back and said, by an illness, this is defined as a small or temporary disruption of the normal state or normal activity of the body, to which the symptoms, the collective symptoms of a hangover and thus a hangover are an illness. So they've said that this place can no longer claim that these will get rid of your hangover quicker. But the side product of this is that now in Germany, hangovers are an official illness,

meaning that if you wake up hungover, you can take a sick day. Yeah, that's immediately what I thought of. No guilt because you're sick. Right. You've got an officially recognised illness. What have they done here? They've opened up a can of worms, haven't they? And you know what it is in Germany at the moment? Oktoberfest.

Although, I think they behave themselves more. Oh yeah, it's the Kiwis and the Aussies and the Brits. Yeah. Everyone else runs am more. Oh, yeah, it's the Kiwis and the Aussies and the Brits. Yeah. Everyone else runs amok. Yeah, I saw some Kiwis' Instagram videos the other day from there and I was like, good international relations. They're used to it, mate.

Yeah. And to be totally honest, Germany doesn't have a spotless record when it comes to international relations, does it? No, it doesn't. A couple of blights on the record there. Yeah. Making you look confused. Are you talking about? of blights on the record there. Yeah. Megan, you look confused. Are you talking about?

World War I or II. Yeah. Yeah. That's the one. So then, you know, next time you're hung over and take a day off. Don't tell your employer, please. Say you had a temporary illness. Oh, yeah, because Megan runs a cafe.

She doesn't like it when workers phone in sick on Saturday and Sunday. Yeah. I've got a headache and aversion to light and I feel a bit nauseous yeah i know what that's called i've been there it's called verslager hasn't it been a wonderful podcast so far and it's all thanks to spark our primary sponsor do you love free data Then you will love the Spark data stack. More data every month that you stay. Hey guys, let's get back into that podcast. There's a bunch of Kiwi businesses that are

encouraging their adult workforce to take part in the Friday protests. Friday for future for Friday for futures? Future for Fridays? Yeah. It's got those three words in it. And fish and chip Friday. Always fish and chip Friday for futures? Future for Fridays? Yeah. It's got those three words in it. And fish and chip Friday. Always fish and chip Friday for the Catholics.

So they're saying that it shouldn't just be the kids that are, you know, getting out there and protesting on Friday and trying to make some change. Producer Caitlin, I believe you're even making some signs and you're going along. That's right. Yep, I'm attending my first strike tomorrow, guys. What's going to be on your sign? Not sure yet. We're making them tonight. I want something wiffy. Okay. But also like

I don't know, but then it needs to be really powerful as well for that to get in the paper. Just search online and just copy someone else's. Climate change board. There's no planet B. Yeah, everyone loves that one. I've seen that before. Come on, Vaughn, that's cliche. I can guarantee that'll be there

that'll be there I think like a pun or something maybe but I'm just I mean this isn't a great content to have

a rain maybe people could send in their suggestions why don't you just put a plastic bag over your head and then like

and then just be like I'm not gonna last long or something right and then hold your sign I'm not going to last long or something. Right. And then hold your sign. I mean poke a hole in for some air. Yeah.

But it's not about the plastic though is it? Where do you get a plastic bag from these days? Exactly. Oh god damn it. I found one the other day I pulled the bottom drawer

out in the kitchen and a couple had fallen down the back. Those are gold at the moment. Contraband. Yeah. But it's not always about plastic

it's about emissions isn't it? It's about a bit of everything isn't it? It's about everything. It's about a bit isn't it? It's about everything, isn't it? It's about everything. It's about everything. How are you getting to the climate march? I am going to drive my car to work because there's no buses at the time that we have to come in. Vehicle.

And then I'm going to just walk around until 12 o'clock when I need to be down at Queen Street for the strike. Is your sign with the pole going to be recycled timber? It's going to be cardboard that I get from recycling bin. How's that? The one downstairs is a hot bin for big cardboard boxes. Big cardboard boxes, yeah.

And then I will reuse that for... The next one. Packing stuff. No, you won't be able to reuse it because it'll have paint on it. Oh, okay. That's right. I'll put it outside my house.

You've already used it? Yep, recycle it from there. But it's painted, so I don't know the possibility of that. Okay, that's good. And lots of Kiwi business is getting behind it. It's good. Yeah.

Because you know we've only got one planet? Well, at the moment. Well, at the moment, true. Sign idea. What about it's good? Yeah. Because you know, we've only got one planet. Well, at the moment. Well, at the moment, true. Sign idea. What about, it's getting hot in here, so take off all your coals? Oh!

Is that good? Is that what you've been doing for the last, like, three minutes while we've been talking? Make love, not emissions. Yeah. I like that one too.

Making love generally does end in... Well, yeah, if you have children. That's why some people, some couples have said we're not having kids. Be part of the solution, not part of the pollution. That would actually be a good one to chant too. Yeah, that's a chant. Yeah, but I feel that would be a cliche one. Do the take off all your clothes one.

That's one. Coals. Coals. Take off all your coals. And then you can make the earth look like Nelly and put a bandage on it. Plaster. Oh, because then it's like the earth needs more than just a plaster. On the Brazilian rainforest part.

Yeah, right. Great planning. So, because it's true. Great planning sesh, guys. Good planning sesh. Thanks, guys. But yeah, it's really the topic of the moment, isn't it? Because there's a meeting and the United Nations and all that.

It's crazy all the old white guys that are triggered by the 16-year-old. Oh, I know. The very people that call everybody snowflakes when they disagree with someone's decision, disagree with a 16-year-old and have said some really awful things about it. Like, it's crazy. Have you seen some of the comments under the news? No.

I didn't look at it. Oh my god, it's like, she's 16. Like, even world leaders are having a go at her. It's like, she's 16. Yeah. Just cares about the planet. No, I didn't look at that. Oh my God, it's like she's 16. Even world leaders are having a go at her. It's like she's 16. Yeah. Just cares about the planet. She cares about anything. This is the problem. Before this, it's,

oh, teenagers don't care about anything. This generation's empathetic. What did they call it? Anya, the epidemic of empathy. No, they didn't care. No, it was the entitlement epidemic. Oh, the entitlement epidemic. And before that was the empathetic epidemic.

A lot of epidemics. And then there's one that like stands up so bravely. Gosh, 16 and standing up in front of the United Nations. Oh, I would have, yeah, no way I could have done that. No, I would have made my mum write me a sick note. Or if she refused, I would have forged it. And then asking how she's getting home because her boat's already gone back. Yeah, but

that's another thing is that it doesn't take like 10 people doing it perfectly, does it? It takes millions of people doing it imperfectly. That's another sign that I've seen around. And you've got your bamboo, your faux bamboo drink bottle there. Yeah, I do. It's so nice.

No wood was harmed in the making of this reusable drink bottle. You did buy two though because you lost your first one. Yeah, I do. Yeah, it's not. No wood was harmed in the making of this reusable drink bottle. You did buy two though because you lost your first one. No, I found that again but I've lost it again. That's why I'm back to the bamboo.

Right, okay. But I think I know where I left it. So I'll get that back. Single-handedly going through quite a few recycled drink bottles, Maud. I'm making a single-use

drink bottle out of all of these multi-use drink bottles. That's for sure. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. A man in Britain has shared a,

I guess you would call it a life hack for better, lack of a better term. Yep. His girlfriend refused to eat the cheap mayonnaise

and would always buy Hellman's mayonnaise, which is a more ooh-la-la. Ooh, okay. So what he did was he said, you wouldn't even be able to tell the difference.

And she said, I definitely would. I would definitely be able to tell the difference. He's like, we're spending too much money on mayonnaise. He loves mayonnaise. At that stage, it probably just became one of those stubborn standoffs in a relationship. And he said, you wouldn't be able to tell the difference. And she said she would.

So about a year ago, he started buying cheaper mayonnaise from Aldi, the supermarket. Okay. And squeezing it into the bottle with the Hellman's label on it. Right. And she has not noticed. Wow.

So he's won that argument. Oh, she's just thinking when it runs out, he's getting a new. Because I was going to say, how are you squeezing it in and then, like, not noticing that it's not in there perfectly? You know, when you open a thing, it's Mayonnaise. Maybe he's only filling it three quarters and she's, like, none the wiser. Just never realising. She just never runs out. Yeah.

Or if it does, he's used it at some stage. Yeah, right. Okay. So that's his little trick to get around it, and she's never noticed, and he's saving himself quite a bit. Because I don't, would you back yourself to, I'm not a huge mayonnaise person.

Like if I do it's in burgers and stuff or I'd be able to pick it. It's side for fries. Best foods, I reckon. Yeah, I reckon I could pick a best foods. Because that's the only mayo like that we buy. Yeah, right. We don't buy a lot of old-school mayos.

We do those lighter, oily-based salad dressing things. Right. But we don't have, like, a blobby mayo as much. Yeah. So I don't know, like, what else you'd even buy to compare it with. But this is a problem when you're with someone and they're a tight ass and you're not. Like, I feel like you'd run into this a bit, Megan,

because Andrew's very savvy and planning, budget conscious, isn't he? Whereas you're just like shoes. I like to spend my money on tangible goods that I like to wear. Right, okay. The first half of that and the second half of that didn't really go together super great.

Yeah, but then he likes to buy expensive toothpaste. And I'm like, that's just brush your teeth with anything, right? It's just toothpaste. One toothpaste matches them all. Some say they whiten, but do they really, you know? I'm like good with buying the cheap toothpaste.

Aim. Oh, but I don't like the unscrew lid. I was going to say like Olivia used to actually screw off. I draw the line say, like Olivia used to have to screw off. I draw the line there. It's got to have a flip lid. It's got to have a flip lid. So as long as it's got a flip lid, you're fine. I don't care what it is. If it's minty, as long as it's minty, I'm all good. What about one of those bougie

vacuum worky ones? Oh, they're real expensive. Yeah, yeah. Super expensive and just like a ton of plastic that you can't refill. Yeah. So, yeah. He likes a bougie toothpaste. Have you thought about of plastic that you can't refill. Yeah. So. Yeah. He likes a bougie toothpaste.

Have you thought about doing this? You can't really refill the toothpaste though, can you? Have you tried? No, it'd be hard to refill a toothpaste with cheaper toothpaste. So what I'm reckoning is you'd notice. You'd get a real, yeah, you probably would notice, but you'd get a toothpaste and you'd empty it completely, but it'll always look like it's kind of,

because you know how when they're brand new, they're like tightly packed, but then when you get them down, they've got all the roll marks. And then you get a small piece of tube or hosing that's the same size as the nozzles. Take the caps off. Push it in. And then just from one side to the other. Go through the tiny bit of piping. A lot of effort for something that's like $2.

You know, like at least mayonnaise is a bit more expensive. $2 extra, you're talking. Those toothpaste are real spinnies. Can we take some calls this morning on those people that are in relationships and one person is a tight ass and the other isn't? Because how much trouble does that cause? I would imagine it would be very hard to. Yeah, when one person wants the budget.

Someone wants the budget version and someone wants the expense version. We have stood in the supermarket and had lengthy discussions about toothpaste. Because there are some things where sure, I'll buy the budget version of stuff like flour, milk, whatever, because it's all the same sugar.

It's all the same stuff. Yeah. Whereas like your biscuits and yummy things, lollies, I'm not going to compromise on those. Don't biscuits and yummy things, lollies, I'm not going to compromise on those. Don't skimp out on the lollies. I'm not going to skimp out on those and go for a budget biscuit. Although some budget biscuits are quite yum.

Every now and then you find them. And we did do an investigation to find out that a lot of those factories make those budget biscuits. Yeah, they do. But they use like a different chocolate, don't they? Or a different... Do they? Do they? Do they? But every now and then,

if you're scamming through the budget business, you'll find a little nugget of gold in the rough there. Yeah. Okay, so 0800-DARLS-AT-M, 9696. Do you go, in your relationship, do you go out with a tight ass? Like one of you is a tight ass, and how does that affect them?

Talking about those relationships where one of you is the tight ass, and does that affect them? Talking about those relationships where one of you is the tight ass and the other is maybe just that bougie lifestyle. And there are clashes and we're hearing from those people. Some text messages. Spaghetti and toilet paper, you can't skimp on them. Oh yeah, I'd agree with that actually. Like tin spaghetti.

I thought you meant like pasta. You turn it like oak. Imagine if you're going out with someone and they like oak. Oh, that's it. It's an instant. That's like learning they're racist. You're like, no, out. I mean, that's it.

Both of them are deal breakers. I mean, I don't like oak, Megan, but I don't know if I can compare it to racism. Both of them are deal breakers. I mean, I'm differing ends of the scale of deal breaker, but both being deal breakers, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. We'll establish that.

Somebody said, I'm a tight ass. He's a major food snob. Finally moved in together and supermarket shopping is very interesting. I just always go for the cheapest option, but he's all about the quality. I let him win because it does taste nicer and it keeps him happy. But the bank account, every time I see it, I'm like, ooh. I'm going to save the quality. I let him win because it does taste nicer and it keeps him happy but the bank account, every time I see it, I'm like, ooh.

Ashley, you're the tight ass? The situation is we used to go through six litres of milk a week and that was just by him and so I started watering down the milk and we got it down

to about two litres a week. He has no idea. So you were diluting it by quite an amount then? It took time, gradually over time, but I put it down to two litres. I love that you wooded it down slowly so that he didn't notice a drastic change. And then he goes to work and he's like, man, this blue milk tastes like cream. He's got absolutely no idea. Wow, and you're saving, that would be quite a lot of money.

Ashley, thanks for your call. Dave, you're the tight ass. What do you do? You take milk, for example. You know, they only drink Anka milk, you know, and I'm like, that's crazy. You know, it's like $1.50 more a bottle. So probably about half a year I'd buy all the cheap milk

and then I'd pour it into Anka milk bottles, put it in the fridge, no one knew. But my favourite one was they were buying, I can't remember the brand, but it was like $8 or $9 for a thing of soft butter, you know, and you put it in the fridge and it stays soft. And I'm like, this is crazy, just use a block and leave it in the cupboard. So anyway, I used to buy butter and then I'd soften it down, whip it all up and then put some canola oil

or some vegetable oil that you couldn't taste and make it nice and smooth and then I'd put it back into the bottle and then I'd smooth it out. Then I'd put the paper thing back on top,

put the lid on and put it back in the fridge and no one knew. None the wiser. Brilliant, Dave. Margarine, Dave. Dave, thanks for your call. Not the only milk story.

Somebody said, my girlfriend said she needed the A2 milk. Oh, okay. That's the lactose one, right? That you can drink if you're lactose. A2 protein. A2 protein. She said she needed it.

She was lactose intolerant. I decided putting normal blue top milk into an A2 milk bottle to test her. Absolutely no difference. I mean, she probably had rumbly guts all day, but don't worry about it. Well, he didn't hear it or smell it. Oh, my gosh. So it kind of happened. We did a milk blind test.

As my flatmates swore by milk, and we bought milk as a flat, but they swore by the Anka Blackout bottle milk. I made them do a blind taste test with Budget Milk brands, and they actually preferred the Budget Milk brand, but they still buy the Blackout because they bought into the hype of milk should never see light. Right. But it doesn't really, except for the few seconds you have it out of the fridge.

Yeah. Yeah. A few people saying that they've only just put together, they've been broken up with a couple of times, and it's when they've voiced, after they've voiced their preference for oak baked beans. Oh, the penny has dropped. Ping, dropped. The penny has dropped. Dropped. Into the oak.

Into the oak. And they sold it anyway. The bean has dropped. Yeah. My auntie used to work for Ernest Adams many years ago and she said that their biscuits are the same as the Pam's ones. They're done in the same factory, just a different wrapper. Yeah. Get out of town. Yeah, so you can same as the Pam's ones. They're done in the same factory, just a different wrapper. Yeah.

Get out of town. Yeah, so you can go for a Pam's Bicky if you're a big fan of an Ernest Adams bag. Those big bag ones. But sometimes it's the bag that will sell you. You'll be like, yes, I am going to sit down and drink two litres of Blackout Anka A2 protein milk, and I am going to eat a bag of Ernest Adams biscuits and I shan't be judged. Didn't you eat a bag, was it farm bake every day after school? Farm bake after school, yeah, Mum.

Farm bake? Yeah. I know. Bougie, eh? Because I didn't like the flash ads on TV. We never had farm bake. Give me crap about my son. Mum bought it because it was a big bag.

It was like a bulk bag. Yeah, but then she worked out we were pretty much just eating that in one sitting, so just... Smaller ones. Stop to that. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Came across this website yesterday. Now, this is a valuable service being offered to New Zealand,

and we need to speak to its creator. But someone running nuggetwatch.co.nz, nugs not drugs is their tagline, which keeps a track of chicken nugget prices in New Zealand and presents the best deals. Will they be awake during the breakfast radio show? Well, it turns out they are awake. Hooray.

And we're joined on the phone by Nathan from Nugget Watch. Good morning, Nathan. Good morning. Now, this website is incredible. As a show and as a person personally that loves nugs, I'm very excited about this website. Tell us, for those that don't know, what Nugget Watch is. Okay, so Nugget Watch is a website that's dedicated

to tracking chicken nugget prices in New Zealand. We also allow users to review chicken nuggets, and we've got a five-point scale for that. Yeah, there's a star rating. We've also got a map chicken nuggets, and we've got a five-point scale for that. Okay. Yeah, there's a star rating. We've also got a map of nuggets around New Zealand. Nuggets of the nation. Yeah, you'll never be short of nuggets in New Zealand ever again.

Not at all. We've got 545 stores and counting. So with these nuggets, and Nugget Watch NZ also is your Instagram account. You say you take user submissions, but what if there was corruption in the Nugget Watch market and, for example, say BP went in and someone from who works at BP sent you a whole lot of very bad reviews for all the other nugget providers in an effort to sort of boost their nuggets, bolster their nugget sales?

Thankfully, there's not been a problem yet. The BP nuggets are pretty good. They might be better. I know. They're the top ranking. They've got a five-star rating, the BP Southern Style Chicken Bites. From three reviews.

Yeah. The sauce is the only thing that lets them down. There is none. Well, you've got to buy the sauce as a separate entity, don't you? Yeah. Oh, Fletcher's. Sweet Chili's an extra bottle. You've got to buy it. You buy it up by the't you? Yeah. Oh, Fletcher's. Sweet Chili's an extra pile.

You've got to buy it. You buy it up by the counter. Look at us telling Nugget Watch guy what's up. Now, Wendy's also gets a good review for nuggets. I haven't been to Wendy's for a long time because I always fall in that burgers just lack a little Ginny Say Quat personally. But are you a big fan of the Wendy's nuggets? They are pretty good.

My favourite's easily the BP. Wendy's is pretty good. And the classic McDonald's nuggets. Can't go wrong. Probably where most people have their first nugget would be the Golden Arches. You actually break down the price or the deal that they do on nuggets at each place, the quantity,

and then the price per nugget, the PPN. I like that measurement. We might start using that. Yeah, PPN. It sounds like real fish, doesn't it? Yeah. And so you can work out who actually has the cheapest nuggets. And at the moment, correct me if I'm wrong, Nugger Watch, but Burger King's $3 for $9

makes it $0.33 a nug is the cheapest in New Zealand. Yeah, they've had that going for months. Yeah. And they rank an had that going for months. Yeah. And they rank an all right nugget too. They're four out of five stars on the Nugget Watch star ranking there. They're pretty good. They're not the best.

They're just good, inoffensive nuggets. Is it pretty inoffensive nuggets? Inoffensive nugget. That's a good way of... Brilliant. It's interesting. I find KFC nuggets currently at two out of five after six reviews, rocking in at 90 cents on the PPN.

You'd think they'd nail the nugget because they're a chicken-based restaurant. Yeah, that was a bit of a letdown, to be honest. Okay. So, Nathan, when you go into a nuggy review, how does it work? Do you sniff it first? Do you base it on the batter? What's the criteria for a good nuggy review, how does it work? Do you like sniff it first? Do you like base it on the batter? What's the criteria for a good nuggy? Okay, so first,

it's all about the taste. You'll find if a nugget has a bad taste, but everything else is just fantastic, then it'll be down to the taste. Right. Because at Nugget Watch, you can actually, the criteria, flavour, mouthfeel, coating, sauces, and overall.

And you rate each of those out of five, don't you? That's right. Yeah. Okay. I don't want to tell you how to run Nugget Watch, Nathan, but is there room in this for reviewing supermarket nuggets? Like what nuggets are best to take home and cook in the oven or the deep fryer?

Or is it primarily a cooked upon acquiring? Yeah, primarily. Primarily I want to focus on those ready-to-eat nuggets. So at the moment we're sticking to chains, and I am building into your chip shop nuggets and having the option to do individual shops. Wow. If you went to the supermarket Nathan and there was like crumbed or batter, what would you have?

I like battered. Yeah same. I'm not trying for crumbed nuggets at all. That's a snitchel domain. Keep your crumb for your snitchel. If you're crumbing something it's a schnitzel. It's like a teeny tiny chicken schnitzel. Don't come here crumbing your nugs. It's like a teeny tiny chicken schnitzel. Yeah, don't come here crumming your nugs, all right?

Yeah, all right. What made you so passionate about nuggets, Nathan? Because it's a brilliant website. I think you deserve some kind of Queen's Honour for this. I'm putting you forward for the New Year's Honours list. We shan't wait for Queen's birthday. So it all started when one of my younger sisters was insistently sending me chicken nugget prices.

I love this. Why? Why? Why was she like? I don't know the why. It's just a thing that happened and then it dawned on me that I would have been one of the few people in New Zealand with this wealth of information. Yeah, so why not share that? And decided to share it, exactly.

Now, there's apps out there like Gas Buy where you can drive around and find the cheapest or the closest petrol and you update the prices. Is there an app in the future for Nugget Watch? There is. I've been working on it for the past month. Yes! Oh, my God, Nathan!

This is what we need. God, yes. I'm proud of you. Oh, good. Nathan, you are a spokesperson. Thank you. It is a labour of love. Yeah.

Nathan, thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us. NuggetWatchNZ on Instagram, or you can write a review and see nugget prices at nuggetwatch.co.nz. The hero that we need, Nathan. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you very much. Ho, ho, ho. Ooh, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

Ho, ho, ho. 89 days, 15 hours and 41 minutes until Christmas is here. What day is Christmas on this year? The 25th of December. No, but what? Is it a Monday? A Tuesday? Hold on, I'll just open me calendar.

I feel like it's Thursday. It's Wednesday. Oh, so close. That means a lot of people will finish up on Friday and have that Monday, Tuesday to do shopping, do you reckon? Friday the 20th. It's a weird one because it's in the middle of the week. I've been attempting to start my Christmas shopping. Like I'm looking. Monday, Tuesday to do shopping, do you reckon? Friday the 20th. It's a weird one because it's in the middle of the week. Yeah.

I've been attempting to start my Christmas shopping. Like, I'm looking. I'm looking. You're so aggressive with Christmas. Prepared? Like, you're literally putting your tree up in a month. I know, I can't wait. End of October it goes up.

Yeah, I know. A stylist from a New Zealand home magazine has messaged in, just to the studio upon hearing that we're doing this and said, I actually begin shooting my first Christmas shoot today, just across the road from you guys. Fletch would like to volunteer his services as Santa or an elf to be in this photo shoot. Absolutely not.

I'm very busy. I've got a lot of things on today. They live and breathe Christmas for three months every year before Christmas even happens. So they get to Christmas and they're done with it. They're sick of it. They've seen it all. They have seen it all. But we have had reports of Christmas flowing in thick and fast.

And here we go. Jess messaged us on Instagram saying she's just got her Once It EDM. That's electronic direct mail. Oh, yeah. Okay. I think. And Once It has set it up the Christmas shop. That's Once It, the online. EDM that's electronic direct mail oh yeah okay I think and once it has started up the Christmas shop

that's once at the online shopping store they've got a Christmas section that's open what are we talking what are we talking

about decorations Megan interior design to do with Christmas and I mean they've started now but one day

started like eight months ago I think they just run a Christmas store year around. Penny's Bookstore in Chartwell, Hamilton. Good to see a little bit of bookstore still in business. Not just all the chains.

Yeah, yeah. Penny's one's doing all right. They've already got their big Christmas card stock out. Got a whole shelf of Christmas cards ready to roll. Old people like Nans love to start writing their Christmas cards now, don't they? Gives them something to do. Now, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, but it's also beginning to smell a lot like Christmas. Samantha has reported a Facebook post from Lush New Zealand

saying they are launching their Christmas range, bold colours, evocative scents and sensational effects. Now, I can see a few Yuletide bath bombs in that mix. Do you think you'd go home if you worked at Lush with a giant hangover? Because of all...

Of smells. Like it's such an assault of smell. Yeah. Yeah. There's so much of it. New house would smell like potatoes.

Yeah. Or last night's like Thai curry. You wouldn't be used to smelling anything plain. Yeah. So you'd probably get home and you'd be like, chalk. Mildew.

Damp. White bread. Yeah. Milk. I'd imagine. It would be quite pleasure. What's that? Milk.

Milk. I was just thinking of white things. Right. That don't smell real bad. Okay. The Palms in Christchurch has been penetrated by Christmas, according to Emily, and has sent a whole row of Christmas decorations

in what looks to be a department store. So she's all over that. Too soon for giant decorations in a store. Kmart and Shirley has, and this is our first spotting of large decorative reindeer. Shirley, you can't be serious. Stop calling me Shirley. K-Mart and Shirley does.

Wow, okay. Yeah, a lot of reindeer there. Somebody has messaged in internationally, Jesse Paha is in Cologne. Cologne. Yeah, fancy. France. Yeah, France. And there is an Ariana Grande

advent makeup calendar in store. So you buy the advent calendar and every day you open it and there's a different source of Ariana Grande. Fun. Yeah.

Christmas onesies are now available for the tottered child in your life at Farmers. According to Lash. Oh, wow, okay. Some photos of some Yuletide onesies. Yeah.

Tauranga has opened up a Christmas shop. Now, those have been popping up everywhere, the Christmas heirloom shops. They're no new business. And the warehouse in Rotorua says, Rach, there's festive wrapping paper, twinkly lights, naughty nice sequined cushions that say naughty and then you roll them the other way and it says nice.

God, I hate that. I can't deal with furry cushions or anything that leaves a pattern if you touch them. Can't deal with them. Why? I don't know. They're not perfect. Like, you've got to brush them all the right way.

Your carpet that you had put in, what length is that? When you vacuum it, does it leave a pattern? When you vacuum, do you have to vacuum all the same way? Oh, yeah, when I vacuum, it's annoying as well. It's not that bad, but I know what you mean. Yeah. Yeah, I do have to vacuum that, like, stripes. The same way.

Yeah. Otherwise, it looks like you've mowed your lawn. Well, I was going to say, you could do it like a cricket game. You could go that way and then, you know, come back the other way. And then the crisscrosses, get your lines up. That would actually look really good. And then someone walks on it.

Yeah, so I don't vacuum. Avoiding the problem. Yeah. Good. And also, jazzy headbands with mistletoe dangling from the wire on top has also been spotted there,

thanks to Rach. So, ladies and gents, let's punch that into the computer and I can tell you... Elves, get busy. Right now, Christmas penetration is at... 44%. It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Just apologies, first cologne in Germany, not France, Vaughan. Just for those that have pointed that out. It's in Europe. When you said France, I was like First Cologne in Germany, not France, Vaughan. Just for those that have pointed that out. It's in Europe. When you said France, I was like... Cologne. All I know, Nazis were there at some stage. Yes, correct.

Don't say Nazis just to cover up the fact you didn't get your geography right. Okay, that's an easy fallback. Nazis walked there. Okay, it's time for... Not from the Nazi headquarters. No. They walked. I mean, they might have put it in a truck.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. It's today's fact of the day that Anya's enjoying her first scone of her entire life. No, it's not. Can we see how she's getting on? How's she going? She's chosen a veggie mite, like a cheesy mite. Okay. So.

How have you never eaten a scone? And you're 21? If you don't usually listen to the show. Three. If you don't usually listen to the show, Anya's a really unusual situation. No, I mean. Thanks, Ward. You're fine.

But your mum was a, her mum was a home economics and still is to this day, a home unusual situation. No, I mean, you're fine, but your mum was, her mum was a home economics and still is to this day a home economics teacher. Yeah. Thus having, you know,

plentiful food knowledge. Yeah. But all Anya ever wanted to eat as a kid was chicken nuggets. So that's all she ever got fed. Yeah. So every, like,

would you say once a month? Yeah. She would eat something that she's never eaten before. And it goes down to something as plain and as simple as a scone. And how's that tasting? Like it's quite um, bitty.

Like, um. Bitty. Bitter or dry? No, not bitter. Like, um. Bitsy. Bitsy is what she means. Right. I was expecting a smoother surface. Oh, that's not a scone. That's a cake. That'sy is what she means. Right. I was expecting a smoother surface. You were expecting a cake. Oh, that's not a scone.

That's a cake. That's what a scone is. It's quite, like, crumbly. I'm going to go out there and say I hate scones. Oh, I love it. Like, I have absolute disdain for scones. I mean, unless they're absolutely coated in jam and cream. I was going to say, because there was one time where the three of us really got stuck into some jam and cream donuts.

And people were like, are you going to eat all of those? And we were like, well, yeah, we are here. At least I'm really hungry, I will. But you're not a scone. Yeah. But it's a Vegemo, it's like a savoury scone. Three and a half stars. Out of a possible?

Five. Okay. Oh, you need to have a boyfriend and co-scon with a sweater. Stop trying to plug your cafe. We haven't had a good plug-in today. So I just sort of rang it in there. You're a good plug-in today. So I just sort of rang it in there. You're a good plug-in for the cafe.

Okay, well, today's fact of the day is kind of food-related. Okay. Gordon Ramsay was nearly killed by puffins. Are they the puffer fish? Are they extinct?

Or birds? They're birds, aren't they? Puffins, the birds. Yeah, no, you're thinking of dodos. It's not dodos. Oh, yeah, okay. This was in Iceland,

the Icelandic puffin. They're so cute. It's like puffin books. Rainbow beaks. You're thinking of a toucan? No, they're orange. They've got like a flora orange beak, don't they? We can go through all sorts of obscure birds.

You're thinking of a pelican, Megan. No, a rainbow beak. I know what you mean. Are they the ones that live in a tank? No, are you thinking of penguins? A toucan can dive. Toucans are definitely a thing, yeah. Is this your thing?

Is this your fact that a puffin can dive for up to a minute, but most dives usually last 20 to 30 seconds? No, that's not true. Oh, that's a side fact. You're welcome. Side puffin knowledge that you're bringing to the table. No, Gordon Ramsay nearly died at the hands of puffins. This is how. Okay.

Gordon Ramsay was in Iceland doing a TV show called The F Word. The F was for food. Oh yeah. He was going to different places around the world and trying local cuisine to see if he could cook it. Yeah. So there's a puffin. Super cute. Oh my god. They're so cute. They've got seagull feet.

It's like a cartoon's come to life. No, are they seagull feet? Duck feet. So cute. They're like a duck foot on a penguin. No, are they seagull feet? Duck feet. So cute. They're like a duck foot on a penguin with a seagull. Look at it run. It's like a duck meets a penguin meets a seagull. I wonder what noise they make. But probably better than all three individual parts.

Yeah. Anyway. They eat them in Iceland. Oh. They eat them and they eat their eggs as a delicacy. Well, Gordon Ramsay was out hunting for a puffin to cook with some Icelandic locals when he fell off a cliff. Okay.

He fell some 30 metres. I can imagine what he said when he landed. I can imagine too. There would have been some expletives. He landed in freezing cold water. Yeah. And he was wearing heavy boots because he was scaling the side of this cliff. Yeah.

And he was also in heavy waterproof gear. And he was like, oh, this is how I die. Yeah, right. Yes, this is karma telling me I shouldn't have been eating those delicious puffins. So he actually inhaled water. He managed to kick his boots off.

He said it was so cold, his head was completely numb. He was underwater apparently for 45 seconds, according to the film crew, because they had the camera rolling still, so they could count it with the little numbers down the side. Oh, my God. 45 seconds? Yeah.

And when he came to the top, that was when he got his boots off and he got to the side and they had to get him out of there. They had to helicopter him out because he was in such cold water that he had immediate risk of hypothermia. Wow. Yeah. So he nearly died.

Trying to eat a cute bird. Wow. That would teach him, wouldn't it? Yeah. So he says a couple of things went wrong during the climb. A puffin bit him across the nose, like the bridge of the nose. And he said it looked like he'd been punched in the face. So he just told people he'd been punched in the face rather than a puffin.

And he said he never got to use his license that he purchased to kill 1,000 puffins. 1,000? So you buy a license and then you go hunting them and you can provide them to local restaurants and stuff. I'm imagining. Fishing licenses, you've got to have the licence to do it. Okay. Yeah, so today's fact of the day is Gordon Ramsey was nearly killed by puffins.

Fact of the day, dayughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, there's been a bit of a mystery at our house lately, the Smith house. We got chickens a few weeks ago. You named them all after the Kardashians. The Klukdashians, yep. And for the last three mornings, we've had one egg every morning. Because they're just getting into the age where they can lay eggs. Right.

And so it's been a big mystery. Somebody said the comb will be redder of the one laying the eggs, but we can see no distinguishable difference. And how many have you got? Eight. So one out of eight is laying eggs. We believe it's the same chicken laying eggs. It might be a different chicken every morning.

And somebody else said if you go to pat them, they'll squat rather than run away. Oh, okay. What if they're laying? No, isn't that what all chickens do? Do the squat thing? No, no, not these ones. They run. Yeah, they run.

They look like the little dinosaurs, you know, on Jurassic Park. Yeah. The little two-legged ones come up over the hill and he's like, they're traveling. The raptors. They travel in herds. No, not the raptors. The friendly ones that are like ostriches. Right. They run. They're travelling herds. No, not the raptors, the friendly ones that are like ostriches.

Right. They run like that so I can see where they got the idea from. But anyway, it's become a mystery that we wanted to solve and last night,

Indy and I, we put our heads together. She said, put one of the security cameras in, focused on, because they're laying in the same nesting box

and we're going to get to the bottom of this. So she's like, divert the house security to the chicken box. Yeah. And we're going to get to the bottom of this. So she's like, divert the house security. Yeah. To the chicken box. Yeah. To the chicken box.

Right. Now there's, it's not there when she goes to school in the morning. Yeah. But the eggs have been there when I get home from work. So somewhere in that morning period they're being laid. Because people are like, you won't be able to see because black and white. It's got night vision, but it's in black and white and we identify them

by colour bands around their ankles or whatever chickens have instead of ankles I think it just goes leg foot doesn't it I'm watching a live stream of the chicken house

at the moment I think we've got sound if you oh okay is there one in there oh hang on it's just a one ear because of the sticky cord I've got here.

Yeah. That's the cord, not a chicken. No chickens are pecking that. Did we put a request in to fix the dicky cord? Oh, I heard a brook brook. Yeah. So we've got a chicken in the box. I think it was the orange chicken, which is Kendall.

Okay. Isn't that what Indy said? She guessed it was Kendall? She thought it was Kendall. She had a feeling Kendall wasn't... Oh, we've had it. Oh, no. Oh, two chickens just had a set too.

That was what the flat... Who's fighting? I can't see, Megan. It's just off camera. Right. But two other chickens are just sitting. One's kind of standing guard. So it's one in the box.

Oh, one's in the nesting box. Do we know what colour that is? That was Kendall, the orange one. Kendall. Okay. That was Kendall chicken. Cluck dash in. Yeah, Kendall cluck dash in. Kendall. Okay. That was Kendall chicken. Cluck-dash-in. Yeah, Kendall cluck-dash-in.

Even though she'd be Kendall henna, wouldn't she? Yeah. Didn't think about that at the time. And funny enough, she's the only one who doesn't have babies. Yes. Oh. Is that the noise they make when it comes out? Nah, I don't think so.

Would they make a noise when it comes out? Like if you had to squeeze an air gatherer? Yeah, I would. I'd be like... They do, don't they? Don't they make the noise? I don't know. They don't even get an epidural or anything.

And they do this once a day. Yeah, good lord. So, what are we just going to... It's exciting watching. We're just going to wait for this chicken to lay an ear. This chicken that's in the way needs to get out. How are you? I'm just going to zoom in on your leg band. Oh, that's the rain. Yeah, band. Oh, that's the rain. Yeah, right. Okay, that's the rain.

It's picking up there. Kendall's getting up. Someone said that noise is the laying noise that we just heard. Well, I'll be able to tell you in a minute when Kendall gets out, if she gets out, she's up now. So is Kendall sitting down? She's standing up now, Megan. Which was she? Yeah, she was sitting down when she made the noise.

She's been sitting down. She's turning around. Could this be the first ever live chicken laying an egg on the radio ever in the world? I don't know, man. Maybe. Could we be breaking radio history and ground? I'm weirdly riveted, though. It's the sort of, another chicken's coming in for a look.

Get out the way. Is there an egg there? Does your security system have a talk feature where you can be like, hey, Bert. Yes. What shall I say? Well, just do a chicken noise. Like an encouraging chicken noise.

What does that sound like? Okay, it's just going to access the microphone. Again, Dickie Court, apologies for that. Because then it might startle. It's connecting. Startle them into a mess. No, you might scare them off, though. It might handle henna and then it might get out of the box.

I'll say, get out of the way. Yeah. That's what I'm going to say, actually. Move. No, no, but you've got to do it in like a chicken. You've got to speak chicken to them. Okay. It's connecting, but because we're on rural broadband.

I mean, heck, I could be watching something that happened 15 minutes ago. That's how slow our broadband is. Right. Kendall's coming out of the box. Her head's out of the box. Yeah. Other chickens are making sort of an inquiry. Okay.

I would say an inquiry, Bob, of the head. Again, I'm not connected to the microphone yet. Apologies for New Zealand's poor state of rural broadband. Maybe we can look into that. So can you see where she was sitting? Not at the moment because these other chickens are in the way. Oh, get out the way. But I should be able to have a clear view.

Rob? Yeah, Rob's in the way. I just wonder if people are finding this that exciting. And maybe we should go to the ad break and come back after the ad break. Some sort of update if I can see an egg in there. Okay, I'm happy to do that. Okay. Just worry that people might not be as into the chicken laying an egg as you are.

Right. Someone said if chickens could yell, that's what the sound would be like when they lay an egg. It's broody, then voluminous bop-bop. Well, that's what it sounded like. Voluminous bop- broody, then voluminous bock-bock. Well, that's what it sounded like. Voluminous bock-bock. A voluminous bock-bock. It's always... Someone said, don't you dare leave the chickens.

We need this update. Okay, well, we'll come back after the... Kendall is standing, but has not yet left the box. All signs point to Kendall leaving the box. We cannot tell if Kendall has laid the egg yet, but we will come back next with the latest update. Vaughn has set up a security camera in his chicken coop. You'd call it a coop.

We're keeping up with the Cluckdashians. Now, when you last joined us, Kendall looked like she was about to hop out of the nesting box, and she did. We've had another chicken go in after that, though. I'm just trying to identify which chicken went into the nesting box after that. Now, we were looking at the live screen. You couldn't see an egg in there, could you? Oh!

What? That was another chicken going into the nesting box. So, we were like, do they make a noise when they lay? Someone said there's an egg laying song. So the chicken does it after laying an egg and the other chickens join in as cheerleaders. Well, that didn't happen after that last chicken. We didn't hear it because no one was listening to it while they were in there. Oh, that could be one coming out.

It didn't look like it was coming from the nesting box. Okay, that chicken's left the nesting box. Okay. No sitting period. Are we going to have another chicken go in? Another chicken's in line ready to go into the nesting box. Also, by the way... Oh, that sounds like they're in pain.

I need a leg. My wife's also watching this as well on her phone. She just messaged. Sitting in the car. She's like, another chicken's gone in. I was like, I... What? I can see an egg.

I can see two definitive orbs. Megan, I'll just get your confirmation when this chicken gets out of the way. Oh, my God. See that top of that white one? See two eggs. See two eggs. There's two eggs. No, those two eggs weren't there before.

They weren't there before. Oh, my God. So there's two chickens laying. Because the fake eggs, we've got fake eggs to encourage them to lay in there, but they'll food the back in the box. Oh, my God. Well, this is great news, isn't it? I'm glad that we could sort that out.

Like, forget Love Island. I'm into this. I can't identify if that chicken that went in second laid an egg. I'm going to need it because this is, I'm watching a live stream on my phone. Well, they sound very, like they've just squeezed one out. But I've got. Congratulations. Plugged into the back of the unit at home is a USB stick with high definition.

So I'll be able to give a slow-mo replay. Do you think this could be the new Love Island, just watching chickens lay eggs? Oh, I'm riveted. We need multiple angles. And then like diary cam. Yeah. How does that go, bro? And what did you do today

when you were lying beside the pool? What did you read? Flesh, fauna, Megan. The podcast. ZM. Rejoice. If you have a mobile phone and can get away with

looking like you're working on it but actually playing a game because there is a new free, you remember when the world went crazy for Pokemon Go? Oh, I'm pretty sure I saw a guy at 5am on the way to work playing that. Today? Because he was doing that thing like the spin the spin in the chart.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So the new game that you can download for free and play against your friends on their phones, Mario Kart. What was... And that you've lost me, all right? And I apologise to all of my friends, wives and workmates who all of their productivity is about to absolutely cease. Right.

As I constantly challenge them to Mario Kart battles. But it's free on your phone. Right. And you play over the internet against your friends. Do you think this is going to be as big as Pokemon Go? You won't see it as much as Pokemon Go because, you know, you can see people walking everywhere with Pokemon Go. Yeah.

And I don't know if there's like a trading aspect to it, which is what Pokemon Go led to. Yeah. But this is just straight up Mario Kart. There was no better way to decide something before Google in the late 90s on a Nintendo 64 than a game of four-player Mario Kart. And the person that won was right regardless of how wrong they actually were in their life.

Because you couldn't just Google an answer back in the day. The internet wasn't as easily accessible. So I'm just very excited for it. And I want to say it's great because it's free. And iBags being Donkey Kong, okay? No one else is allowed to race me as Donkey Kong. That's my character of choice. Forn is too heavy for the tight tracks.

Shut up. I will drive it. It is fine. I will be using a hard handbrake turn. Can you be Mario? Of course you can be Mario. Why don't you want to be Mario? It's a me, a Mario.

Why don't you want to be Mario? I'm going to win. No, I going to be Mario. Why didn't you want to be Mario? It's a me, a Mario. Why didn't you want to be Mario? I'm going to win. No, I preferred a heavier player. Oh. Mario had. Relatable. Ouch. Ouch, Bowser.

That really hurt my feelings. Now, that's not an insult that you'll get, but people who play Mario Kart will. So there's the light characters that were quicker overall, but then if you hit them, they didn't have the weight to remain on the track. You had your mid-grade players, your Marios, your Luigis.

Yeah. And then you had your heavier players, your Bowsers, your Donkey Kongs. Why are you calling me a Bowser? You bitch! ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast,

why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. And music lives here. ZM.