93X Half-Assed Morning Show - ("Best Of"): Butt-Job Bob's Thousand-Thousand Mosh Pits

Episode Date: June 30, 2026

The Best of the Half-Assed Morning Show.  Listen & subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Amazon Music. For more, visit https://www.93x.com/half-assed-morning-show/Follow the Half-Assed Morning Show:Twitter/X: @93XHAMSFacebook: @93XHAMSInstagram: @93XHAMSEmail the show: [e-mail] See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ah, air conditioning, the love of my life. Uh-oh, that doesn't sound good. What's going on, Habs podcasters? We're getting into that soupy part of the summer when your air conditioning is going to be holding on for dear life. That's where our friends at Standard heating and air conditioning come into play. If your AC is out, you shouldn't have to wait. Standard prioritizes homes without cooling, so they got your back.

With over 70 trucks on the road, they're ready to make you comfortable fast. Ah, that's better. Schedule now at standardheating.com, providing the comfort you deserve since 1930. The Half-Assed Morning Show Backtracks. It's Dr. Andrea. On the 93X Half-Ast Morning Show. All right, here we go. Let's get going with our guest.

Dial 6-5-1-989-93 and send us a text message if you have a question for Dr. Andrea Johnston from German Animal Hospital. Ask our vet about your pet. Josh came up with that. Nice to have you back, Dr. Andrea. Thanks. Good morning. Good morning. Off air or not off air? Well, both. We had an on-air conversation about Halloween in Madison, Wisconsin. And then off-air, you said something about being a veteran of such affairs. Yeah. I mean, my husband went to Madison, so he enjoyed every Halloween. But I would drive 12 hours or 10 hours from Ohio for two nights, less than two nights, probably less than 36 hours. And just party your ass off. Yeah. I mean, that street was so fun. But now they have to like sell tickets because it got so out of control.

I didn't know this. Just try and keep the crowds down? Oh, yeah. I mean, it would get crazy. I think they had riots one year or something. Sounds like Madison. I was unaware when we were having this conversation what a big deal it was in Madison come Halloween night. Do you remember any specific crazy stories? By the way, sorry to interrupt, but you were driving for. from Ohio, you were going to school? Miami of Ohio. Miami law. You're Cincinnati. So we had all jump in a car and drive all the way to Madison for two nights.

That's not like making a run up to St. Cloud State. No. But everybody from every school, some people would fly in for it because it's that crazy and that fun. Who did you go as? Oh, gosh, one year I went as a genie. Yeah. Right? Cute.

I like that. I can't even remember. Honestly. Yeah, you party too hard for God's sick. That's hilarious. Yeah. By the way, today is National Treat Your Pet Day, everybody. So give that little peckerhead something or another.

Before we, yes, Josh. I was looking at a list of the most popular dog names of 2025. I was wondering how many you treat. What about Bella? I was going to say Bella number one. So it is. We are surrounded by babies and dogs these days named Bella. Yes.

My parents have a dog named Bella. We're drowning in them. Maybe name another one. See if it's in the list. Zoe. Zoe is not on this list, at least. We got Bella, Luna, Daisy, Lucy, Max, Charlie, Bailey, Cooper, Buddy, and Sadie. You're forgetting Lucky.

Lucky? Yeah, but you never want to name your dog Lucky because they're never lucky. Oh, no. I can attest to that. They always get hit by cars. I mean, it sounds horrible, but. They also mentioned, like, names after foods are becoming more popular. Cookie.

We got Cheats. PICLS. Yep. Pancake. We have a pancake. What about brisket? Ooh, that's a good one. And then they would, this is kind of weird.

Cocoa puffs, mac and cheese, garbanzo bean, spicy sausage, Prince Tater Tad. Wow. Spicy sausage. We get cocoa. We get skittles. You know what's really popular now is like Bruce, Walter. Yeah. Kevin.

Steve, George. The kind of ironically human names. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. I enjoy that routine way more than I do naming your dog. you know, pringles or something like that. That sounds like something a two-year-old would do.

And sometimes that's the case where the child is allowed to... Silly. It's irresponsible. You're not kidding about dogs named Lucky. When I was an eighth-grade kid, we decided to breed our Springer Spaniel, the best girl in the whole world, Megan Marie. And we bred her with another purebred Springer, and that male's name was Lucky. five years later Lucky who as far as everybody knew was a

totally normal dog jumped out the back of a moving pickup Oh that dog That was lucky Did Lucky survive? Hell no He was in pieces by the end of the Anyway before we get into the questions

for Dr. Andrew We thank everyone for texting in 651-989-93-93 That's our Luther Bloomington Kia text line I wanted to say word up to one of your co-workers, Dr. Cam.

Yeah, he's great. And a U of M student who's helping out. Oh, Josh. Yeah, he listens to your show. Hi, Josh. He mentioned that. Yeah. A few days ago, the wife and I brought our kitty in to see Dr. Cam and Josh, and they

were wonderful in helping us figure out what was going on with the Kiti. And a thank you to you as well, Dr. Andrea, because coming up on November 9th, we've got this fundraiser for the Randy Shaver Cancer Research Fund. November 9th at the Wise at Allegion, and you have donated a free dental cleaning to the silent auction. Sweet. Oh, and those aren't cheap. People love it.

People love it because it's a good way to donate and then they get something out of it. What all do you do with dog's teeth from a dental cleaning? Enough for them to just be furious with you by the end? That's why we anesthetize them because we don't want to lose our fingers. Yeah, I mean, they have to. Otherwise, do you have to? I suppose. Do you have an electric toothbrush or?

It's exactly what your dentist says. uses. That's scaler, the polisher. We take full mouth x-rays because there's a lot of abscesses that you can't see. Sometimes we have to pull teeth depending on what you find. But yeah, I mean, it's a pretty and, you know, it's generally an anesthesia.

You put them out cold and they just start scrubbing. Yeah, nobody wants you have to put a tube in because otherwise you don't want anything to go down the airway. They're choking on their teeth. You don't want to lose your fingers. Do you ever find anything super nasty? Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. I mean, we'll find like sticks, jammed. up.

Oh, wow. A lot of times bulldogs get, like, hair stuck up in their gums because their mouth is so weird. Yeah, they got a big sloppy mouth and big lips and everything. That's hilarious. So a dog chewed on a stick six months ago when it's still in its, oh, God. Is there a particular breed that's more difficult than the rest, or is it all? Bulldogs. For dental procedures?

Yeah, because you'll find, like, a tooth in the middle of the palate, like on the top. Like, there's no rhyme or reason to their oral cavity. their teeth. Makes zero sense. Speaking of hair and mouth, Barsoe Jesus had a question about his cat, Rudy, threw up a hairball in his shoe yesterday. He says, what's up with that?

And also, he is getting concerned because there seems to be more and more hairballs recently, and he's not sure why. So he's probably excessively grooming for a reason. One could be anxiety or stress. Two, he could have thyroid disease, so he's losing his hair. And that's why he's excessively

grooming and vomiting hairballs. There's hairball diets you can get two over the counter. That can help as well. What does that mean exactly? So there's actually specific diets that minimize hairball formation. Oh, yeah, I've seen that around. So it doesn't stop them from the grooming, it just makes it so you don't get the hairball? Yeah.

Oh, my goodness. Dr. Andrea, a listener is, it appears to me this listener is looking to take tick prevention to a higher level. They say, I've been lying in bed with the dog, and I find ticks crawling on me. He is on chewable tick prevention. So it sounds like maybe they're looking for something else. Gosh, if he is on chewable tick prevention, like Samparica Trio, Nuxgard Plus, the other one's Crudillo-Quatro, those are the big ones. If their ticks are dead, then the medication's doing its job.

So if you're finding dead ticks in the bed, it's working. This tick was crawling. It was alive and crawling. This means that some human in the house has ticks. Possibly. Or it actually was on the dog but didn't take a bite and then unfortunately jumped ship. Yeah.

You could get a sentinel collar, like a little collar. You can buy that over the counter. That can be added protection, but keep going with the oral flea. Josh used to check gals for ticks in his neighborhood. Yeah. They made me move. Yeah. But I sure did.

It was a free. service I would ask. Do indoor cats need heartworm medications? Also, my cat is a dick. Why is that? I see many of those. So heartworm disease is a thing in cats, mainly for outdoor cats, but mosquitoes are in your house as well. I mean, I like Revolution Plus as heartworm preventative.

It's a topical, but it also covers mites and things like that for cats. I think it's a low risk if you have an indoor cat. I'll be damned. I don't know why your cat's a jerk. Yeah. Every personality is different. You mentioned something about bulldogs a few minutes ago. They have disgusting mouths and they're difficult to clean.

Listener by the name of paperwork bitch, Jesus, texted in a picture of his four bulldogs, all sleeping on the couch together. Oh my God, I bet that's a mess. Their names are Harold, Jackson, Lulu, and Steve. I love that. We have hundreds, he says, invested in dental work. Yeah. Look at them all.

They're all laying on blankets, I would imagine, because they drool all over the couch. Probably need hearing aids at night, too. Or earplugs, not hearing aids, ear plugs. They're so loud. Do they get to yelping a lot? Oh, my gosh. They snore. Yeah.

That's outstanding. What else is going on here? Our guest is Dr. Andrea from German Animal Hospital. Questions coming in. A 12-year-old lab who has seizures. and the lab is on phenobarbital. It has helped control the seizures. However, she seems to now have a facial tick.

Is this a side effect? She has a checkup coming up on Monday, but just wondering your thoughts. So on phenobarbital, but some facial ticks happening. Yeah, so sometimes the seizure meds, one isn't enough as they get older. So sometimes you have to add like multimodal therapy. So you can add like zonisomide or Kepra, other medications to it.

Or you might need to check phenobarbital levels to see if it's actually an appropriate dose. Okay. Yeah. I know you've answered a question similar to this before, but this person says they're getting a Basset hound puppy and would like to get pet insurance. And we're wondering what one you recommend. There's a lot out there. Recently, I've heard a lot of insurance are not covering certain things for certain breeds. Basset hounds being one that get like major ear.

and back issues. So I would make sure they cover that if it's not preexisting, meaning if the pet hasn't had it yet. There's so many out there. The ones I'm familiar with, pumpkin is one. It's a weird name, I know, but pumpkin insurance. VPI. There's so many Trupanion nationwide.

There's so many different health pet insurance. And a lot of companies cover it now, too. Who here has pet insurance? I wish. Never even thought about it. I'm stupid. I should probably go ahead and do that. Oh, this is a disturbing. This is a troubling text message here. Works too much plowing snow. Jesus.

He recently gut a deer and the outdoor cats are eating the gut pile. Yuck. Good. Is this going to be? Of course. Will this be a problem, he says? I mean, deer are not carnivores, right? They eat grass. Right.

But I would still check your cats. for fleas and ticks and parasites. Oh, God. At least it's been relatively cold, so it's not, like, spoiled, hopefully. But, like, the minute an animal dies, like a rabbit or a deer, those fleas jump ship to the next warm-bodied thing.

Oh. That's what I would worry about. Right. And the parasites, my God, deer, are just crawling with... Can you imagine the little faces on these kitties after they're... Yeah, that's what I'm picturing.

It's like a freaking horror movie. Dr. Andrea, what are your thoughts on paying for advanced screenings for healthy dogs, like ultrasounds, blood tests, beyond the basic panels, et cetera? What do you think? Well, I think it depends on the age of the dog. There's a lot of dogs that come in that are 8, 9, 10 that have, like, hidden cancers that you don't know until they're sick. We talk about it a lot.

Like, is there a benefit to doing ultrasounds and x-rays as they hit a certain age to find those things? So you can surgically remove it. I don't think it's wrong. I mean, it's expensive, right? But I think it would be beneficial in some cases. What about just like a new dog? Like maybe if you're buying a used car, you bring it to your mechanic and just have them check it out before you make the purchase?

I mean, I think that's not a bad idea. There's a lot of rescues that already do that when they take the dog in. Oh, is that right? Yeah, they'll do it full exam. We had a dog who they found out had heartworm. Yeah, they'll do all those tests beforehand. Which I had no idea was that big a deal. I just thought it wasn't.

But he was like in a cage for six months basically. He couldn't get his heart rate up yet so bad. Yep. What do you think of dog racing, Dr. Andrea, like the serious dog racing? Like the greyhound dog racing? Yeah. Do you think it's mean or do you think? I'm not a huge fan of it.

I mean, we see a lot of rescue greyhounds that have come from the racing rings. And they are so beat up. I mean, they are. They love to run. But you don't want them to be overused. I think there's a rhyme. There's a time and a place for it, but I think some of these rings are not healthy. If we took you to the track, do you think you'd make some pretty good money by taking a look at these dogs?

I don't think I want to do that. Put the money on this guy. Oh, I bet with your experience, you could eyeball him and maybe make some frigging cash. Dr. Andrea Johnson from German Animal Hospital, who was a University of Wisconsin party guide on the side. I didn't even go there. when she's not at the office. She didn't even go to Wisconsin, but she knows where the parties are at.

You know what's great when we have yawn, Dr. Andrew? A lot of our listeners send pictures of their pets when they're asked. Whether they're asking a question or not, they love to show off their pets, and that's always fun. Ashley, you in particular, I think, need to look up a text message from stallion Subaru Jesus who texted in a picture of their new female coonhound named Abigail. and the picture that he sent in of Abigail,

he says she's six months old and she's very proud of the hole that she dug in under 20 seconds. Pardon me, in under 12 seconds, if you want to see that picture. It is a good size. I mean, it's almost as big as the dog. I think you'll fall in love with that picture.

They're going to have like a golf course or a ski model. Oh, man. Before you know it. 651, 989, 93. That's the number you can text if you have a question. Before we go, we got a few more minutes. earlier, a listener texted in and said, they gutted a deer recently,

and his outdoor cats have been eating the gut pile. A similar question here from Elk Slayer Jesus. He says, I'm grinding up an elk as we speak. Can I feed my golden retriever raw elk? Well, I know for sure that you can do the opposite. No. He wants to know if he can feed. I don't think you can do the opposite.

You can do it. I'm kidding. Of course. Can this man feed his golden retriever raw elk? I mean, you're just asking for GI issues, diarrhea and vomiting. Yeah. I mean, you can feed it. Elk is actually really lean, right? So you could cook it and then feed it.

Cook it up. I would not feed the raw. No. The symptoms you just described remind me, Ashley had to miss a day. Was it raw elk that got you, Ashley? Yeah, I think so. The diarrhea and the vomiting you were going through? Yuck.

Way past my prime Jesus wants to know, is it common for huskies to have neurological issues? They had one that had some issues, which led to her chewing off one of her hind legs. Years later, chewed off half the other one and then her entire tail. Oh, boy. Oh, my gosh, that's worse than my dog. That's so, I've never met somebody like me. No, that's not common for the breed, and it's not common to see it, but there's obviously some lack of sensation back there and self-mutilation,

because the dog can't feel it. So he's just going to chew it off because he doesn't feel like it's a part of his body. Why would they want to chew it off? Because he can't feel it. So it's just, unfortunately, or it's painful and he wants it off too. Hey, I'm here for you.

Yeah, Ashley's been there. Let's talk. You currently own a dog who chewed one of its limbs off. Yes. Yeah, how's that going? She's doing great. Dr. Andrea sees her now, so now she's on the up and up.

anyway. This is hilarious. I love, I love picturing this kind of thing. The listener wants to know, is there any risk or downside to giving my cat a sedative before a plane ride? I'm taking him as a carry-on. Wow. No, I would suggest it. I would recommend it. Usually we use a lot of gabapentin, which is a pain med, but it's also a sedative for cats, especially the ones that come to the clinic and want to chew our faces off. We oftentimes will send home gabapentin. Well, if I've learned anything from traveling with Nick, don't mix lots and lots of booze with Xanax. Yeah, I wouldn't do that.

That can make you want to fight a flight attendant, I saw. It's like bridesmaid. It's fitting that you're here because what I turned into that day, Dr. Andrea was an animal. But I like to believe I'm one of the few people on planet Earth who almost crashed in an airplane with their dog in their lap. I had my dog in my lap, and we gave him a little bit of Xanax. before the plane ride and it worked.

But at one point, we lost cabin pressure and we're screaming towards planet Earth. And I actually put the oxygen mask on my dog's face. That's scary but adorable. I love that, dude. I don't remember who I went to first, but I actually, I think I went to myself first. And then I actually put that friggin mask on his stupid little dachshund face. And he had no idea what was happening, of course. He thought we were playing or something.

But I like to believe I'm one of the only people who had that experience, as horrifying as it was. Can you guys ever see yourself having your pet ride next to you on an airplane? That sounds like such a tremendous pain in the ass. I mean, I would absolutely love to have them there, but I don't think they would like it very much at all. Next thing you know, it goes and steals the meatloaf of the guy sitting in front of you or something like that. There's only one dog that would behave.

And, I mean, still, that's a little iffy. I'm picturing one of my dogs in a flight suit and the other one dressed as a captain. Oh my gosh. You got to trust your. I think you need first class for your dogs. Yeah. They need the leg room. Long legs.

Why does my dog always want to bury himself in a car? He'll bury his face. When I get home from anywhere, he hides under the covers or blankets. Oh, gosh, I wonder what his breed is. But that is a lot of dogs like to do that to be comfortable. In the car, maybe he's a little motion sick. but it's also a way to like kind of get cozy in there. My dog goes straight under the sheets when he jumps in our bed.

We had a dog that she'd look at you like, why haven't you covered me up yet? I need to be under a blanket. Tuck me in. Under the blanket pets, they're a lot of fun. Dr. Andrea, are orange kitties, are they more affectionate than others? And I thought I heard that male cats were more affectionate than females. I've always liked orange cats the best if that much. matters at all. I would agree. I don't think there's like any scientific evidence that orange

cats are nicer, but I love orange male cats. Okay. I think they're the best. They're just sweet. I had one, I had one Big Lou. It was very, very, very sweet cat to people, not so much to other cats. So this listener says, my orange kitty always needs to be near me. Is this because it loves me, or does he have other dire revolutionary plans like the monkeys we talked about earlier on the program. There was a monkey attack in Texas, Dr. Andrew. Oh.

Yeah. Anyway, the orange kitty needs love all the time. Is that typical trait of an orange chick? I don't think it's a typical trait of an orange kitty. I think he's just an affectionate cat. He just wants to be around you. But was that right that males are more affectionate than females? That's what I thought I heard.

I mean, I can see some really mean male cats, but I guess, I don't know. I'd say it's probably 60-40. There you go. I don't know. If you or anyone you worked with ever been a little superstitious around black cats, especially this time of year? You know, never. No, not so much.

No. We were just reading earlier that there's certain, even here it's happened before where there'll be a window of time around Halloween where black cats won't be adopted out. Yeah, I have heard that. I have heard that. But no, I don't think we've ever even thought about it. There's not one person that's like, you take that one. I'm staying away. Filter Bob Jesus has a silver lab, female, seven years old, seems to have bad hips, has a hard time getting up, urinated, laying down yesterday.

Is there a supplement or something they can give her to make her feel better? I think she probably needs more than a supplement. Glucosamine and chondroitin works really well as a joint supplement, but I think you probably need anti-inflammatories, some hip x-rays and maybe some other pain meds. I'd get her checked out. Poor thing. There you go. That sounds miserable. Yeah.

Before we get going, this one might test you. I don't know. It's so rare that you even have a pause when these questions come. Oh, no. Here we go. You're on it. What do you know about rabbits? Here's a guy who says, my rabbit lost its two front teeth.

Will they grow back? Yeah. So they, actually, I do know this one. Rabbits, you have to shave their teeth down because they grow, they continue to grow. Oh. So you have to, like, shave them down. So I'm not sure if he was... That sounds miserable.

Shaving the rabbit's teeth or they fractured off because they were too long. I wish I had more info for you. Yeah, but I don't think they're going to grow back. I do not know that answer. You'd have to take dental x-rays to see... But you gave us some valuable information anyways. I did not know that a rat... Does a rabbit sit still for that?

You'd have to sedate them. But they do horrible under anesthesia. Can you mention bugs bunny without the... those two fronties. Ashley, were you just awing because you were picturing a sedated rabbit? Yeah, just a little sleepy rabbit. Yeah. You know, one fascinating fact about them is when they wake up from anesthesia,

you have to feed them like ASAP. Otherwise, their GI track stops moving. And they die. They always die. Wake up, little rabbit? You've got to feed it right away. Wake up. Yeah.

Wow, we always learned so much. Thanks, Dr. Andrew. Yeah, of course. Appreciate it. Very nice having you in. Yes, happy Halloween. Have a good one. I'll be at Madison.

You're going to Wisconsin. You bought your tickets? Jesus. 93. Ah, air conditioning, the love of my life. Uh-oh. That doesn't sound good. What's going on to Habs podcasters?

We're getting into that soupy part of the summer when your air conditioning is going to be holding on for dear life. That's where our friends at standard heating and air conditioning come into play. If your AC is out, you shouldn't have to wait. Standard prioritizes homes without cooling, so they got your back. With over 70 trucks on the road,

they're ready to make you comfortable fast. Ah, that's better. Schedule now at standardheating.com, providing the comfort you deserve since 1930. Years of hard work, and now you've got pain in your back, your shoulders, your knees, maybe your joints, you need help.

Randy Shaver here with the answer. Dave Bialke, he's got over 30 years experience in getting workers' compensation benefits for people, just like you. Don't suffer. Call Bialki Law today. 763-571-2410 or go to Bialki-Law.com. That's B-I-A-L-K-E-Law.com. And it spells relief for you. Hey there. I'm Paula Pan. How do I save money? Most people give you the cliche answer. Stop buying avocado toast. But they're missing the point. Saving tactics usually focus on

discretionary spending. If you want to actually move the needle, you have to look at your fixed costs. Your rent, your mortgage, your car payment. To change these, you might have to move or sell your car and that's why people don't do it if you want small winds focus on the avocado toast but if you want meaningful change focus on the fixed costs afford anything follow and listen on your favorite platform you're listening to the 93x half-assed morning show backtracks the last couple weeks of school is very busy teachers students are trying to get everything together before the summer break and it just created a big disruption police in california say a brazen vandal glued glued nearly 200 doors shut across a high school just before finals.

It is typical to see senior pranks, but those are more lighthearted, funny, more clever, but nothing to this extreme of damaging over $70,000 worth of property. Newly released surveillance footage captured the suspect in action at Patrick Henry High School in San Diego on May 26. I was walking in, right? And I looked, and there was like all these teachers on the floor, they were like picking at the locks. Word. The video shows him roaming campus between 1 a.m. and 3 a.m. spending nearly two hours, pouring glue into door locks and leaving students and staff with a massive headache just days before exams.

So you still had class that day? We still had the class that day. Yeah, we had to take the final. Shoot. Glue has played a starring role in a vandalism case before. In Texas, authorities accused a 64-year-old suburban Houston woman of damaging a neighbor's home by filling the locks with metal pins, sealing them with super glue, spray painting windows, and destroying for sale signs. As the glue-fueled vandalism escalated, the neighbor installed a video surveillance system to catch the culprit, and that footage did capture her in the act, just not in the way they hoped. Instead, court records show the video caught her committing another adhesive-related crime, covering those cameras with duct tape.

I got to say, that's a brilliant friggin' prank. The dude who glued all the doors shut at the high school? Yeah. That is pretty good. Holy balls. Patrick Henry High School, huh? That's correct. I know a couple guys who went to Patrick Henry right here in Minneapolis. Although, I don't think they call it that anymore. I think it's somebody, it's named something else now.

Word up to Brian and Big John. Patrick Henry High School graduates, Josh. Back to California, home of the high school glue mystery. There's an unusual law you may not know. If a frog dies during a frog jumping contest in California, California, it cannot be eaten. No. Don't even try. What a shame.

Don't even try. This has to be one of the most unbelievable and tragic stories we've told in a long time. Honestly, I can't believe this happen. What's the one thing a bungee jump worker has to do before sending someone off a bridge? Hit the bong? Make sure they're secure. Yes. Make sure the freaking bungee cord is attached.

Oh, no. Yeah. That, of course, is not some advanced. part of the training manual. It's literally the entire job. But authorities say that basic step was forgotten at a bungee jumping event in Brazil, and a 21-year-old woman is now dead. Good Lord. The incident happened Saturday at the Skeleton Bridge in Sao Paulo. According to reports, the woman was preparing for a jump when workers carried her into the platform. Moments later, she was pushed from the bridge. But there was just one horrifying problem.

They forgot to connect the rope. I got to chill up my spine. That's... I picture that's how it would turn out for me if I ever signed up for one of those silly things. Horrible. I watched the video. They don't...

I did not. I tried not to. Just the lead-up. I mean, just knowing what's about to happen. Yeah. Very difficult to watch. That's troubling. I mean, it doesn't show any gore or anything,

but you just see... I mean, she looks happy. How do the people who work for the bungee crowd. How did they react? Oh, responsibly, you'll hear. Oh, no. Video that surfaced online reportedly shows bystanders screaming that she wasn't attached.

As she plunged roughly 130 feet into a ravine below, emergency crews rushed to the scene, but the poor lady had no chance. Though what do you say, workers forgot to secure her to the bungee cord before the jump, and investigators are trying to determine exactly how something so catastrophically stupid could happen. Because when your entire business

model is jumping off a bridge attached to a rope, forgetting that rope does seem like a pretty significant oversight. And adding to the tragedy, her fiancé was also at the event. Oh, no. He required medical treatment after learning she died. That's terrible. And if that wasn't awful enough, authorities say some of the event organizers actually fled the scene after the fall. Get the hell out of there.

Come on. Police later located two of them with the help of a helicopter searching nearby woodlands. In total six people connected to the event, five men and one woman have been taken into custody. The civil police department is investigating and will determine whether criminal charges will be filed. So is there any chance at all that they did this on purpose? It didn't look like it. I mean, maybe. It's a short video. I mean, I didn't think that at all until you mentioned the part that they ran like hell.

No, yeah, they just got out of there. I'm assuming we're in some serious trouble here. That is sickening. And there's people yelling at it. I mean, I don't speak the language, so I'm not 100% sure. Other than just reading, they're screaming. Hey, the rope's not attached. The rope's not attached. Come on, man.

A Northern California police officer was fired and arrested for a little copulation, tossing his body camera into a lake to cover up using his handcuffs while humping and his patrol vehicle for porking. Humping and porking. That's right. I'm a man. Lake Royal Police Department officer Samuel Markham was arrested Wednesday after an internal investigation revealed he tried to cover his tracks after giving it to a gal in the front while they were seated in the back. Investigators said the 34-year-old officer was on duty in late January when he fooled around with his girlfriend inside his marked patrol vehicle.

After the extracurricular activities wrapped up in the rolling love nest, he checked his department-issued body camera and said, uh-oh, they caught the action. So he threw it into a lake in an effort to make the evidence disappear. Frisky lawman... Threw it into a lake. Ah, get out of here! He then reportedly fed fellow officers a bogus story. Markham told police that he lost the camera during an ice storm on January 23rd. In another written statement in June, the warrant says that Markham says that he got rid of the body cam by throwing it into the lake out of fear of disciplinary consequences after allowing his girlfriend to be inside his patrol vehicle.

As a result of the findings, Officer Markham's employment with the Lake Royal Company Police Department was terminated. They said this in a statement. He was subsequently charged with obstruction of justice, making false official statements, injury to personal property and conduct on becoming a police officer coming. The case finally unraveled when Markham provided a written statement, June 6, admitting to the rendezvous and confessing he tossed the camera because he feared being fired for the fornicating, which he was. That's it, huh? I think everyone should have an opportunity to have some intercourse in your work vehicle at some point. Yeah, it sounds like fun. Get permission first.

And don't destroy the property. A Texas man escaped with handcuffs, climbed into the front seat, and drove off in a police cruiser with an officer still inside. According to the Dallas Police Department, cops conducted a traffic stop and arrested a 37-year-old man on three charges, including drive. with an invalid license and unlawful possession of a firearm. Unfortunately for the officers, the suspect wasn't done adding items to that rap sheet. Video of the incident shows the man quietly slipping his left hand free from his restraints and hiding it from officers. He then unbuckled his seatbelt and reportedly tested the locked rear door while being transported to jail. The universal sign, of course, for I'm about to do something incredibly stupid.

When officers realized what was happening, things went sideways fast. The suspect suddenly moved into the driver's seat and trove off, wrestling with an officer who tried to stop him through the driver's side door. Before the cruiser sped away, one officer managed to climb into the back of the squad. The suspect blasted down the road at speeds of up to 50 miles an hour, driving erratically while the officer was tossed around the back seat like Josh's mom on a Tinder date after two margaritas. Oh my God. Tossed around back there.

I just figured somebody was going to send it in. Yeah, I get it. At one point, the officer deployed his... taser. When that failed to end the suspect's brief career as a police chauffeur, he struck the suspect in the side of the head with his gun. Eventually, the suspect unlocked the driver's side door, jumped from the moving vehicle, and knocked himself unconscious. While all this was happening, the officer somehow managed to regain control of the speeding cruiser from the back seat, and he prevented a crash narrowly, I must say. You got, I'm done. I got nothing left.

knocked himself unconscious by jumping up. I'm out of here. All right, now I got a headache all over again. God, that was good. Stop the car. Stop the car. That's where the cop saves. I mean, he almost crashed into another vehicle.

As absurd as that episode sounds, it's not even close to the first time a handcuffed suspect, has stolen a police vehicle. A Florida woman a few years ago was arrested on stocking charges and somehow freed herself after being handcuffed behind her back and placed alone in a patrol car, she then climbed through the partition separating the rear and front compartments, started the vehicle and drove away. It's amazing what some folks will come up with when they're in that state.

You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, a guy that I grew up with, a kid that I grew up with, kicked out the window of a patrol car. He was cuffed in the back. He kicked the windows out barefooted. Because when you're in that situation, you can come up with some things that you didn't think you were capable of. Yeah, and you're probably not thinking too far ahead, I guess. Not thinking about a damn thing, really, Josh.

Oh, come on. Do you have video of this poor bastard going to sleep on the side of the road? The video shows the interior of the cop car. And also you see what the car is looking at as far as about to crash. That was beautiful. Nothing to the guy falling asleep on the side of the road. I wish. I'm so well-rested.

I'm covered in bruises. I can just picture him just wringing his noggin off the... God, I'm a sucker for that. Cops in Estonia say they've got a growing problem on their hands, and occasionally their arms. The Northern European Nations Chief of Police said biting attacks on their officers appear to be on the rise, a concern that's gained national attention following a bizarre nightclub incident

involving a judge. There's a nightclub in Estonia? Yeah, there's a couple of them, I guess. They looked apart. I'm picturing a totally different scene. The dental development started at a nightclub when a judge bit a police officer who asked her to leave.

Following that incident, the chief says a biting boom has spread quickly across the country. Biting is a big concern for us now. I can't prove it statistically, but I feel attacks on law enforcement agencies have increased on the police, on security companies. There's always messages that police officers have been injured, he said in an interview.

One of the most talked about cases happened in mid-May after video surfaced, showing an altercation between a judge and two officers. At one point, an officer can be heard asking a question few people ever expect to ask on the job. Why are you biting me? The chief suggested the highly publicized encounter may have inspired copycats. Since the media report about a judge biting a police officer, there have been incidents every week. I'd like to hope that as adults we can solve problems without biting, the chief had to say.

For now, authorities are treating the incisor insurrection seriously. A spokesperson for the prosecutor's office said an investigation has been initiated into the use of violence against a public official performing official duties. Estonia, did they make it to the soccer tournament this year, Dana? They did not? No. Do they have a decent team? No, I don't think so. They're pretty good.

They're pretty good. Neil Patrick Harris turned 53 today. Ice Cube 57. Just saw him in a movie. Me too. I love Ice Cube. Remake of, or not remake, but I guess an alternate version of Anaconda. Oh, my God.

Oh, you watched that. Wait a minute. An alternate version of the Anaconda movie from the early 90s with Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez and John Voigt. How was it? I watched. You know, it's okay. Yeah. About what you'd expect.

that movie was popular enough to make an alternate version for consumers? Well, they're basically making a movie because they loved the movie. Do you understand? I do not. Jack Black and Paul Rudd, they loved the movie so much. Oh, I'm sorry. They wanted to remake it. I thought you were saying this was like an alternate director's cut of the movie Anaconda.

No. I watched a little bit of 22 Jump Street. Oh, I love those. He's funny in those movies. That's where I saw. ice cube, Josh. 22 Jump Street. And it looks like they're making a new one.

They're calling this one 24 Jump Street just because it's been so long since they did the second one. Yeah. They decided to skip the 23. That's funny. I can't say that I had a great time with it, but it did the trick, I think, for the moment. The half-assed morning show

Backtracks. All right. It ain't no thing. It's just a Monday show. We've tangled with quite a few of these over the years, haven't we, Cubby? One or two, you're right. A Monday program. How many career Mondays are we up to now, Cubby? Do you have any idea? I couldn't even guess. What are the career numbers? I'm not going to say six, seven, don't say six, seven, don't say six seven. I don't know, hundreds.

Hundreds? Hundreds. Hundreds? It doesn't matter. Thousands? Thousands? Probably. It's got to be thousands. Hundreds of thousands? A hundred thousand. A hundred thousand Mondays. I suppose now we should look at this as a special event. Today is officially, our 100,000,000th Monday morning broadcast. Wow. Part of history. Congratulations. Wasn't there like close to that as far as mosh pit goes, or was that a thousand thousand? That was only a thousand,000 mosh pits, created by Pantara many years ago at a rock concert that Josh and I attended together hand in hand.

One of the most profound things I've ever heard said into a live microphone was when Philip Anselmo of Bantaara asked the crowd if maybe they'd like to create a mosh pit at one point or another. Right? Two, three songs into the set, he said. Remember how Phil used to talk to with, he kind of had that, he kind of had that, what's that movie again? He had that Silence of the Lambs type delivery. Oh, yeah, she a great big fat person. He kind of sounded like butt job Bob.

What was the name of that character from silence? Buffalo Bill. Buffalo Bill. He kind of sounded like Buffalo Bill from Sack. silence of the lambs. Oh yeah. You guys having a good time tonight. That's my, I think that's a pretty good imitation of Philip Anselm. So then he got, if I remember right, we were both having a very good time that. We were hanging out with your buddy Marcel. He's the best. How could we not be having a good time? So Phil asked for some mosh pits. And the crowd said, hell yeah, we can put together

a mosh pit or two. Go ahead with the next song. So they went into the next song. And maybe there was one, maybe two mosh bits were created. And they played a couple more songs, and Phil said, I don't know, maybe you weren't listening to me out there. I'm looking for like a thousand, thousand mosh pits. And Josh and I looked at each other and said, that's a number I wasn't aware of. We can't do that.

We need a bigger venue. Much bigger venue if you're going to crib. But you folks know that story already. I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. It was great. Thank you. You were telling me earlier off air that you enjoyed your time. on Saturday standing in a Menard's parking lot selling animal carcass out the back of a truck. Yeah, thanks to everybody that came out.

Oh, yeah, everybody that came out. Met several members of the brother and sisterhood. There was a girl, I want to say maybe... You like girls. Well, slow down on this one, maybe 15 years old, who brought out Nick a thrasher magazine. Oh. I hadn't seen a thrasher magazine since maybe high school. If you're not familiar, it's a skateboarding magazine.

Sure. And so she was, I guess, into boarding and she showed it to me and thinking I might like it And she was right. Now, we're talking at one of those forever. We're talking about a current thrasher or she brought you one from 1982? Like it looked more current. Wow.

I didn't look exactly when it, but it wasn't from the 80s. It had been a while since you, oh yeah, I mean, during the 80s, every friend group had their brief love affair with skateboarding. My friend group was no different. I think it was. We were big into it. The summer of 85 was that time period, where if you didn't have a skateboard, you would just get your ass kicked. But that was about as long as it lasted.

It lasted one summer. And so we would page through Thrasher magazine to see about buying a new deck or maybe some trucks or maybe some rails. Things like, that's pretty cool. Did you guys build ramps? We got in, well, we did that more for BMXing, I guess. No, we didn't build Dick. There was one dude that lived in my neighborhood, though. His dad was a carpenter and built a beautiful skateboard ramp right there in the neighborhood.

So if we wanted to do that kind of thing, we could just. We built one. It was 8, 10 doors down from my folks' place. There was a skateboard ramp. We built one. Kind of the same thing. My friend's dad could make anything. And he made us a bunch.

He made us a half pipe, a couple of quarter pipes. Like a table we could put in the middle of a couple of quarter pipes to jump on. We had like a whole skate park, basically. Gyrating. It was awesome. It was a lot of fun. That's what we learned. We learned how to gyrate on that half pipe, right?

You go this way, and you come back the other way. Saw a kid scalp himself on one of those, which was pretty disgusting. But it was kind of cool at the same time, though. It was not. No, really? Oh, is that bad? Couldn't even find any joy in it? Pretty sick.

You had to learn to drop in, didn't you, Josh? Yeah. That's about all I could do, actually. How did the kid scalp his? himself? Well, that aforementioned table, we kept moving a quarter pipe further and further and further away to see how much distance we could get to jump from the quarter pipe onto the table. This is when we were, this is BMX. Oh, oh, bicycles. Okay. And he, he was the best of all of us, by far. He could do anything. And so, and he also had no fear. He was scared of nothing, which got him in a lot

of trouble. And he kept going back, you know, further and further and further. Eventually he caught his front wheel on that table, went straight down. And his head. head hit the edge. Skelped himself. Sick. You're telling me you got no joy out of that whatsoever? On what? Ashley was asking you. That's how you know, it's pretty bad.

Oh, the scalping? Yeah. No, not at all. That was terrible. Oh. I would have looked at that a little differently. Terribly hilarious. Now we're talking. I knew there was something there.

No, it sucked. Yeah, but. What am I saying? But the bastard still has hair. Maybe I should have scalped myself and the hair would have stuck around. Worth a. worth a shot. A gal brought you a thrasher magazine to your appearance at Menards. Yeah, she showed me that. It was cool. It was a lot of fun. Lots of people, you say. Yeah,

and I'll tell you what, people loved that meat deal that was going on out there. Huge line. The whole time we were there. It's a good deal. Yeah, it definitely is. It's a good deal, she says. 20 rebis for $40? That's right. I'd love to do that again. That was a lot of fun. So thanks for everyone that came out. I wanted to say, where was the? The tax tier. Shoot, I wanted to get a tax date came in too quick. But I guess I'll just leave it at that. Really appreciate it. And I hope we do some more of those.

I'm going to be somewhere next weekend. I'm not sure where or when yet, but I will be somewhere. I will keep you post-stakes. You're going to do it? Yep. You will be somewhere in the near future with the same meat selling group? Yes, I believe it'll be on the 20th. So keep your ears open.

Well, that sounds like, does that sound like Saturday? Well, yeah, it could be. Yes. Could be. 20th, Saturday. It depends on the year. But if it's this year, that sounds right. I think it's this year. I wanted to mention to No Hawk Welder Jesus and his crazy hot wife.

Where did you guys go? They came out. I wanted to say hello. We talked for a couple of minutes. I thought they were going one way. I went and looked for him and they disappeared. I was where they were kidnapped. I see he's texting in this morning, so they're okay.

Where'd you guys go? That's the kidnapper texting you. They Irish accidentally you. Keeping up appearances. They took the phone? Yep. Well, don't you think maybe they ducked into Menards and got wrapped in they got involved in the mayhem indoors.

It's easy to do that. I know I did. Medical device Jesus has texted into the program. He's a longtime listener. He's a long-time listener. We got to talking about the skateboarding craze of the 80s. He's around our age, I think, Josh. I think he's younger.

I thought he was quite a bit younger. I thought he was maybe Dana's age. I guess I'm not sure. All right. I guess he looks to be around. It doesn't matter. But he says this. He and his friend group

growing up, I believe he grew up out there in Michigan. He and his friend group had a rivalry with the skaters in their neighborhood. I don't know what it was, medical device Jesus. I don't know what it was that he and his friends were involved in, but they did not get along with the skaters. They called them curb squirrels. I've never heard that. But you know what they did?

They went on back in the woods where the skaters kept their ramps, They're half pipes and this and that. They went on back to the woods, found the skaters ramps, lit them on fire. Boy, they did have a rival. Man, everybody remembers their first arson. He said it was awesome. I bet it was. What were you doing?

What was your activity? Why did you have this rivalry with the skateboarders? I'd like to know more information. And you seem to always be there, medical device, Jesus. So I know you can answer this question. What was going on there? What was your group? about and why was there this this static with the skateboarders we had our fish

house burned down you know that story there was a group of dudes that didn't like us and we we got a fish house going out on the lake in Wizzetta that's where we like to spend our time quite a bit 10th grade and 11th grade I don't think we did a hell of a lot of fishing but 10th and 12th grade we certainly were big into going out ice fishing and there was a group of guys that didn't like us, they burned our fish house down. I'll never forget, loading up, you know, rods and reels and stopping by the bait shop and got the auger and everything. We're heading out to do some fishing. We rounded

that corner and there was this glow coming from the lake, but we couldn't quite see exactly what it was. You know, there was just this glow in the tree line and we rounded the corner. There was our fish house completely engulfed in flames. That'd be so pissed. So pissed. Well, we were pissed. Matter of fact, I punched a kid in the mouth for that. Yeah. In the hallway, I got in trouble for that. Because I knew he was the one who set it on fire. So I punched him in his mouth.

Here's the thing, Ashley. Yes, we were furious in that moment. Stayed mad for quite a while. But looking back now, we had it coming. We were terrible people. We were a terrible group of... Darned. We were.

We had it coming. All right, so I'm waiting for that response from medical device, Jesus. Why was there this rivalry with the skateboarders? and you burn their ramps down. Oh, yeah. You were saying, Ashley, no hawk welder, Jesus. I was wondering what happened to he and his wife. I thought they were kidnapped.

I was pleased to see a text thinking, okay, everything's okay. You suggested maybe the kidnappers actually have used their phone and they're posing as them. Yep. Well, you're going to feel like a fool because he got back and said, this is totally not the kidnappers. Kidnappers would never say that. They would never say that.

You're right. real stupid right now. I'm so dumb. All right, I already have an answer from medical device, Jesus. He says, our group was into hatred of groups that were not our group. I get it, yeah. It's as simple as that. He says, that was our hobby to not get along with other groups. We were angry, stupid young men.

I like that they spread the hatred out. They didn't just single in on one group. They hated any other group. Yeah, I love that. That wasn't their immediate group. I like that that's no longer a thing anymore, that hatred of somebody who's not not aligned with your views 100%.

And how old of a guy are you, medical device, Jesus? I assumed you're around the same age as Josh and myself, but tell us, how old are you? Okay, yeah, I'm glad also, Josh, that we've evolved. We don't really have that kind of thing happening in the United States anymore where groups will hate each other just because they're not the same. If you're different from me, right. I'm glad that is come and gone.

The word is harmonious. Today, Dr. P. Jesus is going to stop by. We've been told there are more spots available. Available. We have been told there are more spots available for our Independence Day boat cruise partner swap. Coming up on July 10th on the St. Croix, we have more spots available. Josh made an announcement last week. You said that we've sold one boat out.

You're going to need a bigger boat. We needed to go ahead and try to get our hands on a bigger boat. We did. And now after only the weekend, we're close to selling out that bigger boat? Yeah, our promotions department thought that it might sell out by tomorrow. We're in the like tens of tickets left. So if you'd like to go, your best bet would be to buy them today. Yeah, like you said, they doubled the boat.

With these new ticket sales, they said, well, maybe we could get a bigger boat. and the boat people said, no, what do you want? You got a big boat. So this will be it. This is as big as it gets. Yeah, we can't get a bigger boat. We can't get a bigger boat. No.

This is as big as it gets. No. All right. So go ahead to our website. It's $25 to get your ass in, get your ass on, I guess, more literally on, our Independence Day booze cruise boat. July 10th, that's a Friday, 7 to 10 p.m.

on the St. Croix River, thanks to the folks at Stillwater River. What happened? I don't know. Was that you? Yeah, I thought my mic was off. You had that problem. Did you sneeze?

He sniffled. A sniffled. You make a lot of dad noises. I really do. Your microphone. I've had this lingering cold for like two weeks now. What was I saying? Stillwater River boats, thanks to those people.

And the sponsor, 10K construction. Drinking, carrying on. We'll have something or another there for you to eat. It'll be wonderful. 25 bucks. DJ Chris. Chicky, chickie, chickie, chickie, chis.

I wonder if he'll take requests. You better take requests. You know, sometimes they're artists. Yeah, he does. I've asked him before, I think, if he's played some music. I would like to give him a full-on song list. Like it's your wedding? Yes.

I want to maybe try to control his every move. That's my goal. He'd probably let you. Seems like a nice guy. Let's try to control every single. single thing he says and does. Yeah, a couple times I've talked to him. He's been really nice.

Medical device Jesus is 42 years old. I thought he was older. About a year older than Dana. Dana, your birthday's coming up for, what, a couple weeks? Yeah, be 41 in about two weeks. Oh. Are you doing anything crazy? No, absolutely not.

Josh, you were a BMX kid. We covered this earlier. You were doing tricks on your BMX bike when you were young on half pipes and ramps and things. like that. Oh, hell last week we talked about your BMX excursion from Minneapolis to Ely. That story still blows my mind. You know, people text in and said that was nothing. They were talking about some of the

bike trips they took. And I mean, people were going multiple states. I don't know how you can do something like that. Well, they probably did on mountain bikes, not a BMX bike. Totally. I guess they didn't see. Yeah, yeah. That's ridiculous. If you went on a long-distance trip on a mountain bike or a, what do you call those things, just a regular 10-speed bicycle, like the Tour de French type people. That's totally different.

These idiots went 250 miles on frigging BMX bikes that are meant to be on dirt tracks for short bursts. No wonder you have such nice calves. Go ahead. I was going to say, no wonder you have such nice calves. I think that that one calf workout just made you have great calves for life. Dude, yeah, that's so true, Dana. So poop foot Jesus is how you say it.

He texted in and said the BMX guys in his neighborhood were always douchebags and they took up too much room. There's too many of them? Too many of them. He didn't like that friend group. He didn't like the BMX group. The reason that the bike topic came up last week was because I was worried I had to do some biking on Friday. And I thought, boy, I haven't been on a bike in a while outside of a very, very short ride a couple years ago. And I was wondering how I could do it.

You know, I did a super long bike trip once, and I thought, I bet I'm in some serious trouble now. I had to bike maybe seven miles on Friday, and I thought I was going to die. It was the most humbling experience of my, if not my entire life, pretty close. Like, Ashley, there was a very slight incline at one point. I had to walk my bike up because I was on mile four. I was going to have a heart attack. That doesn't, I'm surprised, honestly, but I guess if it's very hilly, then that would be a lot. more difficult.

That's not even a warm-up for regular bicyclists. I thought you'd do a little bit better because you're like, I don't know, you're somewhat active. You make sure you get your steps in. Regular bicycles are for suckers. I have, well, there was quite a few e-bikes out there, and there was one lady I almost thought of writing a check to if I could just hold on to her handlebars and she could drag me the rest of the way.

I'm sorry you had to go ahead with that. I can't imagine. It was embarrassing. I can't imagine. how horrible it would be if you today put me on a regular bicycle and asked me to go somewhere's on it. I'm so used to my Harley Davidson electric bicycle hitting that throttle whenever you've got even the slightest obstacle. So that sounds nice. That sounds miserable, Josh. You had to pedal like you actually, the sprocket and the pedals actually offered resistance.

I haven't felt that in years. And I don't have a lot of experience. This is my only the second bike with gears I've ever had because I always had BMX bikes, even until I was in my 20s. And it took me a while to remember how to use them. Like that's the wrong way. Wait, this is way too easy. Dude. My goodness, this is difficult. I went 10 miles Saturday.

On your e-bike? On my electric bicycle. Do you do any pedaling at all? Well, you have to pedal in order to engage the pedal assist, I think is what it's called, where that motor propels you. Like when you got your push mower, I know you're the only sucker in town who still uses a pushmower. Well, it's a walk behind. Right, that's what I mean. That's what I mean.

You squeeze the lever and it propels itself, right, Josh? Yep. Same concept with my Harley-Davidson. As long as I am pedaling, that pedal assist will propel me. So I put it in the lowest gear and there's no resistance whatsoever. All I have to do is just kind of slightly move my. legs. So it's such a breeze. It's such a friggin' breeze. But I know what you mean. If I ever have even attempted to shift the gears, I have no idea what I'm doing. No idea. And you're kind of

punching until I find that lowest setting. I appreciate folks trying to make me feel better by saying how windy it was on Friday. It was. Yeah. I had a buddy. I talk to him. He's like, he's a bicyclist. He's like, oh, it's completely different muscles. Don't feel bad. Well, I think I should be able to bike seven miles without feeling like I was going to die. I felt that for like a day and a half. It was so stupid. But you made her.

Yeah. Thank God for vehicles. Thank you, God. Now you don't have to ride that bicycle again for years. Hopefully not. Years. It's torture. All right, what else is going on?

I mentioned Dr. P. Well, I got an interesting text right when we walked in the beach. building. Got a text here from hardcore, hardcore flooring Jesus. I recognize that Jesus' name. Did I forget something from Friday? This cracked me up. Listen to the, this is what he texted

at about 4.30 this morning. Hopefully today Nick is off his period. That's a nice way to start the day. Hopefully today Nick is off his period and it's a better show because Friday sucked. I'm sorry.

I thought Friday was a lot of fun. I've listened to you guys for 25 plus years, and I listen every day, and Friday was my birthday, and I shut you guys off for the first time ever. Everyone has a bad day, but you still have a job to do. Wow. That's hardcore flooring Jesus. Darn, we did that on his birthday? Did I have some kind of a meltdown last Friday that I don't remember? I don't think so.

I mean, he's particularly angry with me in my performance from last Friday. Josh, he claimed that I may have been, quote, on my. my period. I thought you were, I'm assuming, you know, when people say that, they are usually saying you are acting out in a bad mood. And I don't remember you feeling that way. I don't know a lot about men's bodies, but I don't think you have periods. So yeah, I guess I don't know exactly what he's talking about. I can't be sure on that. I can't be sure on that period thing either, but he had to shut us off for the first time ever. And then he teaches us this little life lesson. everyone has a bad day

but you still have a job to do. Thanks, Dad. But am I forgetting something? Well, you said you came in and he said it felt like you were high, remember? Oh, sure. And then we talked about Seven Dust a lot. Yeah. And then we talked a lot of what Huey Lewis.

You know, we did kind of go kind of skewed a little bit different direction. I thought it was a lot of fun though. Yeah, nobody was in a bad mood. We did have a little bit of a different approach, Dana. You're correct. I also had a good time. Well, we've established today we have, we have established today. We've had thousands of Mondays.

There's been thousands of Fridays. I promised you we put in an effort every single day, whether it sucks or not. It never intended to suck, but I'm very sorry that person felt that way. Oh, I don't give a rat's ass if he feels that way. I don't want anybody to have a bad experience. I don't care. It's kind of a mean way to start the morning. Well, just for the record, here's what hardcore flooring Jesus might not know.

Not that this was intentional to anger him on Friday. Not at all. We all are sitting around thinking, you know, we thought it was a pretty good. good show. Hell, it was a Friday. How bad could we, how bad of a mood could we have been in? But here's something you didn't know, hardcore flooring Jesus. And maybe this is obvious. I sincerely love the idea that I cause someone to change the channel. That is hardcore flooring Jesus. I'm sorry, you meant to teach me a lesson today, it sounds like. But that is exactly what motivates me to show up every day. The thought that I might make someone

change the channel and maybe forever. I love that threat too. Oh, I'm sweet. reaching the K-Fand. Oh, okay. I would too. Enjoy it. I'd love to hear back from this guy. I wasn't here. I'd love to hear back from this guy.

What was it? What was it that happened? We're missing where you're going with that. Oh, this is great. Medical device Jesus just texted in and said, hey, my friend group's going to pay this guy a visit. You want to start trouble with medical device Jesus and his hardcore Michigan anti-BMX crew?

I don't think you want to start trouble. with those boys. They burned it down. Some people are suggesting maybe hardcore flooring Jesus was in a bad mood on Friday. Maybe he had his period. Yeah, I could be it. Probably. Well, we'll just have to start setting the bar lower, so he'll never be disappointed.

What's that line? What is that? The Departed? I'll take a cranberry juice. What are you on your period? Anybody? The Departed? Great scene from the bar.

Jack Nicholson, Leonardo DiCaprio. Some other big guy, a big greasy guy with gray hair. I'm going to mark June 12th down on our calendar, and I say every year we put on the worst show possible, just to ruin his birthday. I love that idea. Should we call it Hardcore Flooring Jesus Day? Yeah.

Write that down. From now on June 12th, there's hardcore flooring Jesus Day, and we're going to sabotage this bitch. Oh, I can't wait until next year. Come on. Just so every birthday he walks away going, well, that was a nightmare. Yeah.

Air conditioning, the love of my life. Uh-oh, that doesn't sound good. What's going on, Habs podcasters? We're getting into that soupy part of the summer when your air conditioning is going to be holding on for dear life. That's where our friends at Standard heating and air conditioning come into play. If your AC is out, you shouldn't have to wait. Standard prioritizes homes without cooling, so they got your back.

With over 70 trucks on the road, they're ready to make you comfortable fast. Ah, that's better. Schedule now at standardheating.com, providing the comfort you deserve since 1930. Years of hard work and now you've got pain in your back, your shoulders, your knees, maybe your joints, you need help. Randy Shaver here with the answer. Dave Bealki, he's got over 30 years experience in getting workers' compensation benefits for people just like you. Don't suffer. Call Bealky Law today.

763-571-2410 or go to Bialki-Law.com. That's B-I-A-L-K-E-L-K-E-L-K-E-L-K-L-K-E-L-E-L-C-E-L-S-E-L-S-E-L-S-E-L-SEN. Full-SEN Golf, part of the Full-SEN podcast. All right, the Full-Send Golf channel. I was like, let's go to the range. Then fell in love with it. This pot is about to be crazy. I don't even know what's going to have.

Reds. Let's go. You guys know how much I really, really love golf. All right, Salame, we got two pots to break 80 here. Get it there, right? You wouldn't want it any other way, brother. These are the ones we practice. Go, go, go.

Yeah! Oh, let's go. 80s, bro. Yeah, even though it's for Reds. It's just like a boy's scrap. Full set golf. Follow and listen on your favorite platform. 93X, the home of the half-assed morning show.

I hope folks don't mind a little bit of a slow vibe this morning. At least just for starters. I hope folks don't mind a, uh, like a more measured, moderate beginning to the show. You know, it is Monday. I'm sure there's quite a few listeners out there who were feeling a little cooked. There was lots happening last night. Some of us got in late.

You know, Josh, let's try to take her slow. I'm fine with that. Slow and easy, like White Snake used to sing us that song back in the day. Welcome to the Half-Ass Morning Show, everybody. Welcome to hopefully a very leisurely Monday broadcast. Well, some of us might be forced to take it slow. There's one member of our program, I understand. I haven't heard the story yet.

I've just been informed that one member of our program has shown up to work with a physical injury. Yep. Was it heroic? I mean, were you rescuing children off a burning bus or anything like that? No, I was just walking in the backyard. I can't see you from here. So what happens is I got a bad ankle, real bad ankle. My right ankle, we've talked about this before.

I could just be standing at the kitchen counter making a sandwich, and it'll just roll over on me. I got one of those two. What happened? Well, it's been sore the last few days, and it just gave way on me on Saturday night when I was just walking in the backyard. Didn't think much of it, because, again, it's happened to me 500 times in my life, but I woke up the next morning.

Great pain is very swollen. Had to go in. They took an x-ray. They said, well, there's something wrong, but it's not structural, so they might have to do an MRI this week. So embarrassing. Well, you know what? That's what happens when you get old, man.

I was going to say, this is my first big, this is 40 moment, for sure. Yeah, I got one of those ankles, too, and, yeah, my yard has tried to swallow me up in the same way. We had moles or something. Whatever it was, was digging holes, you know, big tunnels on our backyard where it was real smushy. It was crazy. Like, you could feel exactly where their tunnels were. And sometimes there'd be a hole there. And there was a couple. I thought I was going to break my ankle a few times, too.

So I know what you're talking about, Dana. Yeah, it's sketchy. Yeah, not good. They got an x-ray that some bitch. They already did x-ray. The x-rays came back clean. So there's no bone damage, but there could be some type of, I don't know, ligaments or something or they're going on down there.

Whatever's in your ankle. Yeah. Yeah, I walked in and to say hi to Dana from the weekend, and I see his legs propped up with a huge bag of ice on it. And I thought, what happened to you? I told the, when I got back with a doctor, I said, I need you to heal me up fast. I got to get back to the All-Valley

karate tournament that I'm competing in right now. Yeah, I hope you made it back. I'll tell you what, who's this that texted in already? Box, toss, and Jesus. He had a bad ankle once. He had to have a couple of plates and screws thrown into that pig. Hoping to avoid that. He had some plates and screws thrown in there.

He said, now it's as good as new. I would love to hear you squeak when you walk. You can't sneak up on us then. So you twisted an ankle over, out there in the backyard. Yeah, I wish I had a cooler story. I wish, like, Josh, I did something heroic, you know, saved a woman from in front of a bus or something, but no, it's not the case at all.

If you didn't want to golf today in Randy's tournament. You know what? You could just say I'm not available. You could have just said, I don't want to go golf today at Randy's tournament. You didn't have to come up with this elaborate yard story. Randy's a big boy. I know. And it's not like the tournament would have shut down.

down if I couldn't make it. Not at all. Not at all. They would have trudged on without you. Joe Maurer, Marcus Filino said, what, Wessel's not going to be here? Right. Let's go to the casino. Culvers folds up the tent, Fulton beer, waves the beer trucks. Just go home. We don't need you. We could have cured cancer if it had been for Wessel faking an ankle injury. No kidding. Yeah. I've gone down in the yard before with, you know, no, real dramatic cause, you know? Yeah, definitely. You step on it wrong.

You know, I've got one of those weak ankles, too. You step on it wrong, and there you go. I told Nick, not too long ago, my, remember I was telling you, I got out of bed and I thought my ankle was broken. Oh, I remember that. Yeah. That's where I thought Dana 50 sucks. Oh, yeah?

There was no reason for that to happen. I thought maybe when I was told that you were injured, because I had no idea until about five minutes before we went live. Ashley and Josh filled me in on just the fact that you were hurt. I was thinking that maybe you tore a piercing or something. I thought pickleball. That's hurting everybody. That is hurting everybody.

But if I'm playing pickleball, I'm being held hostage. I thought maybe a piercing had been torn off of you. But, okay, well, that sucks because that's painful. and like you said, it's a reoccurring thing. Frustrating. Yeah, that's the thing I was telling my wife. I'm just annoyed. Frustrating.

Stupid. Listener named Tom Settit Tora's right knee meniscus getting out of a lawn chair. Oh, my gosh. That's not easy getting out of those lawn chairs. Yeah, some of them are very difficult. Yeah, you can tear yourself up in all different ways, especially once you hit 40 and above. I got a minute.

I'll prepare. I'll start to do like ankle exercises. Red Butcher Jesus thinks you have bitch ankleitis. That's like what my kids told me. Jesus, balls, uh, Auntie Boobies, Jesus. Fell into his window well while cutting the grass. Oh, no. Oh my gosh.

I'm so afraid of that. I am too. I am too. I'm too. I'm too. What happened, Josh? Who calls you bitch ankles? What'd you say?

Uh, my kids. Once I, when I rolled my eyes. ankle. I mean, I wasn't nearly as bad as Dana. It was just sore for a couple days and it got big and fat. But yeah, they called me bitch ankles or something like that. Yeah, they go on and on when you're watching a ball game and an athlete goes down. They go on and on, especially when it's a non-contact injury. Well, look, they'll say, you know, the announcers will say, oh, my, there he goes. He goes down. And it was a non-contact injury. He wasn't being tackled. He wasn't being fouled. He wasn't being body checked.

we regular folks, we don't get enough sympathy for our non-contacted. When an athlete goes down for no good reason, my God, they more or less hold a telethon for the guy. Oh, he fell down. It's just a non-con, we're the ones who need that sympathy, not these billion-dollar prick bastards playing football and baseball. I figured who it was. There was just a baseball player last week who pulled something while stretching, and you're right. They acted like nobody made fun of him. Nobody called him like bitch hamstringitis.

or anything? No, big toes, ankles. Everyone's texting in now the silly ways they've hurt themselves. And it can be a lot of laughs to discuss topics like that. No question. Big toes separated my shoulder. Well, wait a minute. Trash Daddy Jesus. You look like, sounds like you were trying to prove something. Trash Daddy Jesus said he separated his shoulder from the collarbone trying to BMX. Yeah, that's cool. We're talking about embarrassing ones. That's what you get for trying to BMX. Yeah, you don't get made fun of from that. You get chicks when you get yourself injured doing BMX or something.

Yeah, we're trying to be sad and pathetic here. You're in a separate category. Oh, that's the dude we met last week, Trash Daddy. He thinks he's cute. A listener of ours tour, their ACL getting into their car. Getting into the car. Mowing the lawn. Yeah, a lot of folks are hyper-extending things while mowing the lawn.

But my tour is ACL slipping on ice. I saw it happen. It was fantastic. Running from the cops, that was one of my favorite ACL tear stories. We were running from a beer party in high school. And at one point or another, we all had to clear offense. One of us didn't make it. There's my buddy, the king.

I don't know. Josh, remember meeting the king back in the day? Yeah. I want to say it was like an edge fast or an ex fast. Probably. And it was the beginning of a bad run. for the king. 17 years old, he hops over a fence with a case of beer on his shoulder and

that right knee. He's, ah, without me! Oh, man. Take the beer. Ah! And, of course, we did go on. I don't want a minor consumption. We did go on without him.

You guys didn't have the no man left behind rule. No, hell no. Even if you asked for help, I just would have kept running. We did. We all kept running. He, I think he's on like his third or fourth knee now. Oh, man. It was a beginning of...

Oh, and it all started there. My buddy who tore is ACL, so we weren't positive the next day. He was torn, but he was in a lot of pain. I said, hey, let's go to the bar. Let's get a drink in you. So we're sitting at the bar and waiting for him. There's a guy next to me, and we're just chatting, you know, this and that, like bar talk. My buddy comes, and he starts telling the story, and I'm laughing at him.

The guy next to us is getting the conversation. He's laughing, too. And I said, well, how much pain are you going? He goes, a lot of pain. And my new friend reaches into his pocket, and he pulls out this bag of pills, different colors and stuff. different colors and stuff, and he kind of sifts through, and he finds two matching ones. It goes, here, take these. So my buddy just takes him, pops him in his mouth.

Nice. And I go, wow, my buddy's no prude, but I didn't know he was take pills from a stranger kind of guy. And then the guy goes, all right, it was nice to meet you guys and pays his tab. And my buddy just looks mortified. You didn't know that guy? I thought that was your friend. I go, no, you're just a guy that next to you at the bar. And you let me take pills from him?

You seem pretty adamant about doing it. Yeah, boy, he's trusting. How to go? They're fine. There's probably just some pain pills or something. Sorry, sir. I don't think of his face. He thought that was like my long, like high school buddy or something.

Dana. Congratulations. You are now on birth control. Have you taken a dose of tribina for your ankle? I don't think I've heard of tribina. Is this a joke? Criminal investigation. She just says, try that.

You know, try being a man. Take a healthy dose of tribeen a man. All right. You know what else has been given way on our listing audits? audience, their backs. Ah, yeah, that's a tricky spot. They say once you really injure your back, you keep that problem until the day that you die.

My back's a little ify, and I don't know if it's ever going to get better talking to other moms because I got like an epidural. After you get one of those, sometimes your back can be funky for a very long time or forever. We don't want you to be. You know, you need another epidural. You won't feel a thing.

Yes, exactly. Dude, I wish I could have one of those every single day in my life. But yeah, like I can't lay on the ground on my tummy. and then like prop myself up on my elbows anymore. The elbows. Yeah, it starts to get very, very painful. You and your husband are down one sexual position. You've got to come up to some new ones.

Yeah, when you throw out your back, when you have that first back surgery, from what I understand, you never shake it. Yeah. Here's a listener, Robot Builder Jesus, who threw his back out. He was carrying a hamper of clothes up the stairs, John. and he had to step over a baby gate. Ah, yeah. And that's where, weep.

Baby gates, dogs. That same thing happened in my mom. She was at my brother's house and she was going up her, she was helping him out, going up his stairs, carrying a laundry basket, trying to get over a dog gate. And she fell down the stairs and like smacked her head on the wall. Oh, man. There goes mom. She had a concussion.

It was very bad. But my brother said it was pretty funny. I bet it was. I bet it was a freaking. and riot. I bet. Mom and what was she carrying? Laundry basket.

Just underwear's and t-shirt. Sox flying all over the year. You hear her skull ring off of the wall. Yesterday I was carrying a little table, and my dog was laying right, you know, they like to lay right in the way. So he's blocking the doorway. And so I just told them, you know, let's agree you're not going to stand up. I won't make you move, but I'm going to step over you.

And of course, he stood up, knock my ass to the ground, table fell on top of me. Luckily, though, I don't have this bitchitis that Dana has. has so I didn't injure myself whatsoever. Stupid injuries is the theme this morning on the half-fast morning show. Feel free to text us, 65-1-98-9-9-93, stupid, embarrassing, painful, stupid embarrassing injuries. Sleep injuries are now being texted in where you just wake up and somehow you did something terrible to yourself while sleeping.

It's always my neck. My neck and my back. Speaking of sleeping, so I had a big ice pack, you know, a big Ziploc bag full ice on my ankle last night and was elevated. and at some point that ice bag kind of fell and opened up so I woke up. Not only was in pain because of my ankle, but I thought I wet the bed. Dude, that sucked. You wake up was just wet.

Just a comedy of errors in my life right now. I'd be so pissed off if that's how I started my day. We hyper extend our knees at Target. I'm just going through text messages here. Just walking around Target. Oh, we pinch our necks and pull our muscles. Oh, I pulled my neck muscle changing a windshield wiper, says a listener. Sometimes when you're in like a week.

weird stretching position you're not used to. That can do it. Something pops out of a sudden. That's up. Sneezing. People have sneezed hurting themselves. It's a friggin' thing. This person broke their thumb playing pole position.

Oh, I loved that game. Oh, that game was fun. Wow. At the old video game arcade, they'll give you some pills to clear that up. At the old video game arcade, Josh and I have covered this before. If you went to the neighborhood video game arcade in the early 80s, it was the most lawless spot in the county. I've watched documentaries about the history of arcades and whatnot.

It makes me kind of sad that I grew up in the Chuckie Cheese era. Underage drinking. Mass amounts of illegal drugs. Prostitution. What? All were part of the early 80s video game arcade theme. Are you normal Jesus? Tor rotator cuff pushing himself off the counter that he was leaning on,

waiting for a microwave burrito. You had to have surgery and take a month off of work. Oh, I hope that was one hell of a burrito. So there you go. So we'll try to take it slow this morning. Appreciate all your text messages. That'll be helpful along the way to have all your hilarious, embarrassing injury stories at the ready. Ashley and I last night attended Randy Shaver's big cancer research.

Gala fundraiser at Medina Ballroom when Randy joins us at 730. We could tell you a little bit about last night. See Willie Miles was the entertainment at Medina during Randy's fundraiser and C. Willie knocked it out of the park. He was so good. That was the first time I've ever seen him do his little comedy routine and it was awesome. He didn't get so funny. Didn't get a chance to see him.

He was kind of, you know, doing his regular routine kind of staying away from the crowd until showtime. So I didn't get a chance to see him. I ran into him at the end. I didn't get a chance to talk to him, but of course I saw him on the day. Oh, you did? Yeah, and I missed him. You know, I told him we said hello and.

Maybe we'll see him tomorrow night. Exactly, yep. Pardon me, maybe we'll see him tomorrow on the show. Food was good, had a couple of beers, a lot of money was raised today. What did they have this year? I'm trying to think. So I'm trying to think what they usually have. It's usually pretty good stuff, like you said.

For food? They had some tortellini. That was delicious. Some roasted Yukon gold potatoes. a vegetable melody. There was a melody. Some salad. Sing us the vegetable melody.

Vegetables, vegetables. No, you'll be hearing some tunes out of me later because of the vegetable melody. Oh, geez, I'll bet. Today, Randy, when we talk to Randy at 745, he'll be a little later than usual, because today's the big golf tournament part of the fundraiser at Rush Creek. So Randy will be on the telephone. and he can tell us all the big timers that are golfing today. Did we ever decide, are you going out there this morning, Ashley?

You're going to stick around here. I was going to ask you guys what you would prefer? You're in charge, whatever you feel like doing. Oh, gosh, I don't like making decisions. Well, you've got plenty of time to think about it. Okay. I'm stressed up. Randy will be a little busy this morning, but we'll get a crack at them in one way or another.

Dancing. Oh, yeah. I pulled a butt muscle dancing. Some of our listeners, as we've been discussing, stupid, embarrassing personal injuries, a few of them have texted in about hurting themselves dancing. The butt muscle, and that got you on a slow dance. Am I correct? It was a slow dance at a friend's wedding.

We went to the right, we went to the left, and I had to run to a chair. Well, I shouldn't say run, stumble to a chair. I pulled a butt muscle on it. That's a large muscle. The butt muscle. Yeah. It didn't take long to bust that thing. The gluteus maximus.

My wife brings that up to this day. I would too, yeah. What was the rest of your evening like after tearing? Just sitting on a chair the rest of the day. But sitting must not have been terribly comfortable. Do you have to have one cheek on and one cheek off the chair? Yeah, putting a little more weight on one. So, of course, it looked like I was flatulent the entire evening.

He had some of the vegetable melody. You were lifting one cheek. Yeah, kind of. Like, I'd have to every once in a while, just kind of leaned to one side. Yeah, so people are thinking, well, this guy's got terrible gas. Yeah, and he's very comfortable with his body functions. Why didn't you go ask grandpa for the hemorrhoid pillow?

Boy, you're not kidding. That probably could have helped. Ouch. Others here, I see, are telling stories of their children, injuring them. Got hitting the nuts plenty of times. Luckily, nothing serious, though. Yeah, that's what I'm getting here. Little kids popping them in the yap and breaking a tooth out of mom's mouth.

Oh, yeah. My wife's been headbutt a few times. You're right. What did you say just a second ago? Oh, getting hit in the bag. That's where I learned you can get hit in the bag from behind. I never knew that growing up. Yeah. You know, we did play the sack tap game in sixth and seventh grade. But, yeah, getting hit from behind is, that was new to me. That changes your world, your outlook. A listener is asking, is today the anniversary of Randy Shaver's golf cart pond incident?

couldn't tell you the date, but... I mean, it's this event. Yeah. It's the same event. I'd say it counts. Yeah, I'd say it's the anniversary. And it usually happens about the same time of year. This event usually is right. Like Josh said, early June. So close enough for us. Yes, every year that follows the infamous golf cart pond incident. Yes, every year is an anniversary. Whether it lands on the same date or not, it's close enough. What were you saying? We should have had like a gathering in the parking lot. People can come and reminisce.

The parking lot of the golf, uh, you know, joint? Or here. Or here. Yeah, anywhere. We could rent it out a place. I don't care. I believe that on the Rush Creek golf course, I'm going to be stopping by there later today. Ashley, you're golfing, right? Heck yeah. I think they have put up a sign.

Yes, they do. There was one there last year. Oh, actually, since it's happened, I think they've had a sign up there. And there's usually something dorky on Randy Shaver's golf cart that he's driving around, like, don't sink this one. A life jacket. A snorkel or something. Yeah. Yeah, that, I mean, one of the greatest, I mean, certainly the most notable thing to ever happen at a golf course in the history of Minnesota. At least here locally, that's the greatest thing to ever happen on a golf course.

And it happened to the right guy. Happened to the right guy. Because if it was anybody, like if that happened to you or me, he'd be enraged. He wouldn't find any humor in it. He'd hold it against us. And even if it was accidental, he would assume we were effing off and we caused the accident ourselves. You're like Samir or something. He would not be happy about that.

One of my biggest regrets in life is not being here the day that we found out that that happened to Randy Schaever. I was on vacation. You were on vacation? Yeah. He didn't have much of a sense of humor at first. No, he didn't. I know, but I just wish I wanted to hear his voice. He doesn't.

It's just so bad, like the first initial reaction. He doesn't like to be the center of negative attention. Yeah, maybe not the best person. Is that the right way to put it? Yeah, he doesn't. The butt of the joke. He doesn't want to be, yeah, he doesn't have a sense of humor when it comes to that too much. He's getting so much better now that he's retired.

But I suppose he had this image, right? He had to protect this honorable newsman. Yeah, and I think he did feel really bad about the camera guy he had with him. He almost drowned a camera guy. Yeah. Maybe on this program, he has a little more patience, I think, for being the butt of the joke. He absolutely does. But at this golf tournament, this charity means so much to him.

I don't think he wanted to be the dupus of the event, at least at first, like Josh said. He did loosen up pretty quickly on the whole thing. But, I mean, that's humbling to be a grown man. And you almost drown in a pond at a golf tournament because you drove the golf cart into the water. And you're the face of the whole event. Yes, that's humbling. Yeah, I would have a really hard time coming back the next year, but he doesn't have a choice. Can you imagine he just gives up?

Raising money for cancer because of embarrassing. Turns into the Julie Nelson Cancer Foundation. And I'm sure that's funny. Someone brought up that since the incident where he went into the pond and almost drowned one of his coworkers and himself, since that incident, I can believe that every year now they hang a life jacket or something from his golf cart just to remind him. Yeah, they put a sign next to the pond that he went in.

Right. You know, the infamous story about my dad, sleepwalking off the back of a moving houseboat in the middle of the night, and he very likely should have drowned and died in 1986. Luckily, his friend saved him at the very last second. We were, my brother and I were probably 13 when that happened, and the old man didn't want to tell us about it. I don't think he was concerned about us being scared by the story because we were 13 and we didn't have the most gentle childhood.

You know what I mean? But he didn't tell us right away. I think it was because of embarrassment. He didn't want us to think he was a frigging buffoon, right? The way my brother and I found out was we were hanging around at the old man's house and one of his buddies stopped by. and handed him a cabbage patch doll floaty that you might put around the waist of a baby when you put them in a pool.

Yeah. And my dad's like, ha ha, funny, you know, right? And we're like, well, what's that all about? I don't get it. I don't get it. Why would your friend give you a cabbage patch doll floaty? And he goes, well, boys, I got a little story for you. And he told us to hope.

But I think, yeah, that was more out of pride than anything. Yes. He did not want to be the butt of it. that joke, at least not in front of his kids. So there you go. Hey, it's Dana. Smart Club member of Standard Heating and Air Conditioning. When your AC isn't working, everything just feels off.

That's why I trust Standard Heating. They're fast, reliable, and make it easy. So it's just one less thing to worry about. And if you've never tried them before, now's the time. Get $75 off your first service or tune-up. And while you're at it, mention 93X. Standardheating.com, providing the comfort you deserve. since 1930.

Years of hard work and now you've got pain in your back, your shoulders, your knees, maybe your joints, you need help. Randy Shaver here with the answer. Dave Bialki, he's got over 30 years experience in getting workers' compensation benefits for people just like you. Don't suffer. Call Bialki Law today. 763-571-2410 or go to Bialki-Law.com.

That's B-I-A-L-K-E-Law.com. And it spells release. for you. One Night with Stiney. One night with Stiney. Shout out, Tulsa and Nel. This is just about me being myself. It's going to be chaotic.

I can't guarantee anything. All I can guarantee is that you're going to be entertained. How can I join an OVO? You can keep DMing Drake or keep paying. I like O'Neill. I do that. I know that. I know you DM Drake all the time.

I know. You paid me $3,000 on Venmo one time to text him for you. Dude. One night with Stiney. One night with Sine, baby. Let's go. Follow and listen on your favorite platform. The 93X half-assed morning show.

Backtracks edition. Let's give a word up to a feller here in town by the name of Emmett. Where do I have his information? Cubby, tell me what you think of this set up here. And you guys can tell me a lot about this, I'm sure. So there's a guy in town, he calls himself Emmett. He got fed up with the constant price hikes on streaming services. Tell me about the price hikes on streaming services.

Is that something that keeps you up at night? It doesn't keep me up at night, but it is frustrating that, you know, what used to be about $7 a month is now about $30, it seems like. Well, the tough part is it's everything. Any subscription, really pretty much anything you buy is more expensive. Right. Adds up quick. I finally just canceled a few that I haven't used for a couple months.

And I can't wait until something comes out that I want to watch on one of them and I have to buy it again. I got your password. Sometimes you're treated better as a non-customer. Like when you join, hey, we're going to give you all this free stuff. and a wicked deal on this for a year or whatever it is. That's a good point. All right, so this Emmett character decided he'd go in a different direction.

Didn't like the price hikes on streaming services. Didn't like the fact that apparently they constantly removed some of his favorite television shows and movies. So what did he do? He's got a pop-up movie rental business. Awesome. I think this is pretty cool. I don't quite understand, but we'll go ahead, finish it and I'll explain. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He calls his operation sloppy disks and you give him a few bucks. He shows up four or five times a month, typically at bars and coffee shops, and you can rent a DVD from him. He's got 250 DVDs. It says you can search his collection on his website. I went to the website. I can't find a single movie. But he typically brings 100 movies to each pop-up. So if you still have a DVD player,

I guess this is your alternative to streaming services and all the fancy, schmancy new stuff they've got going on. Well, read the prices, though. That's why I don't fully understand how this is a better deal. I wish him nothing but success. But when I got to that, I thought, well, my goodness, I think streaming services are cheaper. You give them $15.

and then you can rent all the movies you want for $5 each. $5 each. The $15 is a deposit. So if you don't bring back at the DVD, he gets to keep the $15. But when you're done renting DVDs, you get your $15 back. Does that seem like a lot per movie compared to a streaming service? A little bit, yeah. Yeah, especially because you can rent most movies for like $3.99, $4.99.

Yeah. And there's a couple of streaming services I have. I think there are $7 a month or something like that. that. So, I mean, you watch two movies. And again, I hope he's very successful. You watch two movies and you're already over. Okay.

So his per movie price is a little higher than what you get on streaming services. Seems that way to me. All right. Yeah, maybe a buck a movie might be a better deal. But as somebody who worked in the rental industry has experience in the industry, I do kind of like that. He's trying to revive renting movies again. Well, you like everything that's.

everything that's, what's the word I'm looking for, Josh? Retro. Nistalgia, retro. You're a very nostalgic and retro guy. You'd support anything under that theme. I really do, yes. Shell Jesus has texted into the program to say, I have over a thousand DVDs.

Shell Jesus. Well, hell, you should be the top competitor to this Emmett guy then. get out there and rent these out to fools. I have noticed a lot more people kind of going back to getting DVDs because people realizing that these streaming services, you don't own anything, you know. They can take things away. By having a DVD, you can physically watch it any time you want. And people are starting to realize that by spending this money on streaming services,

you don't physically own the media. You're basically just borrowing it for a charge each month. I've thought about that before, but I rarely, rarely watch a movie twice. I have one done for sure. I can watch it. I have something I used to buy digitally. I can watch it anytime. So you're saying you, but you prefer to have the physical? Yeah, a lot of people are saying they prefer to have a physical copy of it that they

technically own and can't be taken away because the digital thing in the cloud, it could just go away someday. Okay, that's how I used to be with compact discs. even when I have no idea what do you call these new gimmicks so we can listen to music. Streaming? Streaming. Okay. Spotify. Spotify, things like that.

Right. Even after that kicked in, I was still buying compact discs. And my friend would say, why do you buy these things when you can just punch a button on your phone? And I had a thing for a brief period of time where I had to, well, I still like having the CD itself with the cover and the lyrics and whatever. pictures and information. I still, I like that gimmick. I know it's foolish. Recently, I finally turned my DVD in, DVD player is how you say it.

Recently, I turned my DVD player into a thrift store, Goodwill type of a place. And I believe I also turned in most of my DVD movies and things like that. Will I come to regret that? Potentially, I don't know. We don't know. You'll probably be fine. Probably fine.

Yeah. I gave way all my DVDs, and I just kept the ones that I know will never be on streaming services. Maybe like certain concert DVDs. Oh. Or, you know. And you still have the DVD player? I still have a DVD player for that reason. Now, that's definitely an advantage to owning something in case it just goes away.

Right. You can't find it someplace. Josh, didn't we know a guy years ago who kept all of his DVD porno movies, and there were a lot of them? Hell, we heard from Shell Jesus, who said they have, he or she has. well, I'm guessing it's a he with the Jesus name. A thousand DVDs. Can you guys even think of what your total number was at any point? I bet I had one point I had about a thousand.

I would probably be, you know, small hundreds, 100, maybe 200, if even. Wow. Yeah, we never really had a lot of those, like when I was a kid. We'd never had like a huge stack of DVDs or anything, maybe like 10. Well, we didn't even have a VCR until I was in high school. So we never had any of that growing up. But when I got older, I would buy it. And then eventually I'd buy the ones that came with a digital copy so you could bring it with you.

Where in the hell did you keep a thousand DVDs? In my parents, I was a junkie back in the day. There was one of those buy-sell trade media stores in my neighborhood where, you know, you could go and buy a used DVD that somebody else turned in for four or five bucks, you know? Oh, cool. So I was a junk in that. We had two big bookshelves in our basement. those Florida, you know, I can't describe it really, but two of those big bookshelves,

and they were chock full of DVDs. That is so cool. I was always so jealous when I went over to my friend's houses and they had stuff like that, just like whatever movie you wanted to choose. Oh, that's so cool. I maybe had 50 or so and half were concert DVDs, um, band documentaries and things like that. Wrestler documentary.

Oh, for sure. I like that. But anyway, um, a thousand sounds like an insane amount. I just don't know where the hell I would put them and how I would justify that because there had to be a good percentage of those DVDs, Dana, that you never even looked at.

A thousand? My God. But I was going to ask Josh, didn't we have a guy maybe that worked in the building here back in the day that had an immaculate collection of DVD porno movies and he kept them in alphabetical order? This is a story I heard and he would dust them off and make sure they were in pristine condition?

Yeah, he still does. And it's not just movies. It's any type of porn from any genre, any year. I mean, going back to like the 40s, and he has it all in these protective sleeves, right, dust-free sleeves. He has World War II porn. Everything. Jeez.

He's got like, he's aficionado of all of it. Magazines. VHS. Boxes upon box. I should say bins. You know, they're plastic bins full of them. categorized. No, I like naked

movies just as much as the next guy, but that sounds like maybe he has a problem. Yes, that's a little scary. Dude, yes. This guy, he does. Masturbates all the time. Oh, yeah, he tracks, like, how many times

he's masturbated to each. No, he does not. I'm kidding. Oh, my God. You know what, actually, knowing him like I do, he might. He's very detailed. That scared me. Can you imagine? Oh, that was a real good session right there.

I just gave you the same look that I gave you in the hallway a day or two ago, didn't that? Oh, yesterday? Was it yesterday? Yeah, on the way out, I messed with Nick and told him I was having lunch with a particular person. I'd say the name, but nobody listening would know who it was. But the look you gave me was half, actually three quarters disappointed dad. And one quarter, I think my friend just cracked up. Yeah.

Like he just went insane. Josh told me he was going to have lunch with a very, very, very questionable character. And I bought it because you are the type of guy who would sit down and try to help anybody. And you know what? There is a part of me that would be willing to do so, but I understand it would be a terrible idea. Nick, I totally would have believed him too if I had been there. I gave you the same look right there. when you claimed the dude tracked his masturbation and kept it all on record.

But sure, I'm not making that up. This guy pays closer attention to his porn collection than he does his loved ones. He watches over it. He guards it. He has a lock on all the boxes. He dusts them off. He keeps them in alphabetical. Come on.

That's a little scary. I don't like that. Dana, I don't know how I, if I, if I, were you and I had that many DVDs, I don't think I would have gotten rid of them, because it sounds like, something like that is awesome. Like, that's different. Did it hurt when you got rid of them? Not really, to be honest. I mean, because a lot of them were, I mean, like, when am I going to watch rat race again, you know, that type of thing? So, no, it didn't really sting too much. I kind of, like, I kind of just downsized over time. It wasn't like I just dumped off a thousand DVDs at Goodwill in one

sitting. I just, I kind of just, as I moved, I was like, okay, am I going to watch this again? No, probably not. So it was a slow process of eliminating these. Because if I worked at Goodwill and you walked in with a bucket of 1,000 DVDs, I might choke slam you because I know as an employee I'm going to spend the rest of my frigging day sorting through these. Yeah, making sure that the DVD matches the case, making sure it's not scratched. Now, Dana, the statute of limitations is by far run out.

And you're already smiling. I think you know where I'm going with this. the company is no longer in existence. You worked at Blockbuster. How many of those videos did you steal? Well, we got a lot of them for free. We did. They just gave you some?

Yeah, because they start off with, you know, a hundred copies of Kill Bill when it first comes out, and then they whittle it down, they try to sell some, and then when they get to a point where it's like, all right, we have this stack of Kill Bill DVDs. We're never going to sell, and then employees could have them. So, yeah, I didn't steal any, but I did get a lot of the collection from working at Blockbuster.

Oh, I would have been. stole so many. A lot of people did, actually, and I would just watch him do it. We have some people in our listening audience who have or had an incredible collection of home entertainment. High Hopes McGee, Jesus. I own 500 DVDs, 100 TV box sets. Oh, I think he means like a complete collection of a television show.

I used to have some of those. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I had all. That was great. I mean, before you could stream them. I had all in the family. I had good times, the complete box set. I wish I could tell you I got through.

I had Beavis and Butthead, but I never got through most of it. 700 digital movies, says High Hopes, McGee. Jesus. I can understand the nostalgia, though, because I'm kind of going that way with books now, where before I would just read them on a tablet or something like that, and now I'm buying them or going to, well, mostly going to the library, but buying some. Because, you know, there's a particular author you like,

you can buy their new book. usually for no extra cost, it would be autographed if you're interested. So I do a lot of that for some of my favorite authors. I will always prefer a physical book. Mostly, I just, it's not, it doesn't hit the same when you read it on like your phone or tablet. And sometimes, yeah, it's nice to give your eyes a break too at some point from staring at a screen. It's just, you know, for me it was like, well, then I could have a ton of books on this thing for whatever I'm into, you know, at the time.

So I did really enjoy that, but now I'm kind of getting back more to the regular ones. Gunslinger, Hippie Jesus said he inherited. his great-aunt's vintage VHS porno collection, which included a copy of Jane Bond Bond meets Octopus. I bet that was a classic. Sounds good. Probably a lot of Peter North and Christy Canyon involved in those vintage porno movies. One of our listeners has over 3,000 DVDs in their home right now.

Man. Many people are texting in to say that they have a thousand thousand DVDs. That's the type of mosh pit I like to be in. highest number possible. So yeah, anyway, I'm a little upset that I couldn't find. Again, we started talking about this dude named Emmett here in town who goes bar to bar, coffee shop, the coffee shop, and sets up his pop-up DVD rental business called Sloppy Discs.

I was a little upset when I looked on his website. It says right here you can look at his collection. He's got 250 DVDs. to choose from. It says you, you can look at his collection on his website. I couldn't find any of them. I wanted to know if he had Angel or avenging Angel on DVD. You guys probably don't remember the Angel movie series. I remember you talking about it, but I can't say I... My brother and I fell in love with the Angel movie series when we were probably, I don't know, seventh or eighth grade kids. It was on HBO. It's about a hooker and she's hot and all of her

friends are hot. And so they're naked most of the movie. And there's a killer on the loose, killing all the prostitutes, but Angel and her friends solved the crime. I was hoping maybe he'd have a copy of Body double. Body double. I'm looking at the list right now. I was able to pull it. How do you find it? Does he have body double? It does not have body double. Well, then forget it. Does he get new

ones for a rental, or are these just older movies? I'm trying to look right now. It's all an alphabetical order. You know, almost famous. Apocalypse Now, Atonement. Oh, I don't know Atonement, but Certainly, Apocalypse now. I don't recognize any of the movies.

Unbelievable. Apocalypse now? No, in his. So he has like a picture of him sitting at his little table here. And the movies that are up front that he seems to be, you know, most proud of. I don't recognize any of them. Well, that's your problem. Like Monkey Man?

What's Monkey Man? Do you guys know that? Hugo? Well, there's The Wizard of Oz, but. Well, maybe he's showing off a bizarre movie. on purpose for a joke. But I'm telling you one more time, I thought everyone was getting rid of this stuff.

Our listeners, some of our listeners, as I'm reading text, wow, you have an immense collection of movies and this and that on DVD, on VHS. Wow, we were. This guy's website's pretty cool. I must have clicked on the wrong thing or something.

Yeah, you must have. The one I was on had no information at all. It had one picture of the man and it mentioned a pop up or two. Of course, he has the fast and furious franchise. But it doesn't look like he has all of them, Dana. Looks like the only one who's missing is too fast, too furious. Maybe you could sell it to him for a huge number.

I got copies for him. Here's a question that Josh, maybe you can answer. And the text message begins with this. Question. That's my favorite way to start. Yeah. Do the newest PlayStation and Xbox play DVDs like the old ones? You know what?

I was going to ask that, too. have an Xbox, the latest version. My son plays it. I don't. I think it plays DVDs. Okay. You have a PlayStation, don't you, Ashley? I have an Xbox one. It plays DVDs. It doesn't really like anything that's not Blu-ray. It looks like crap. I mean, do they even sell them at Target or Best Buy anymore? I know, I've seen them, like, within the last couple years, and the section where they sell them is tiny now compared to what it used to be. I did used to love walking up and down those aisles.

Oh, that was the best. They sell them at Walmart, but they're usually in just like a huge bin in the middle of the aisle. You dig through the movies that even like TNT wouldn't play at midnight. I've gotten a little, you know, crazy. And I'm like, I might as well look through that and I bought a couple movies. And actually, I found them the other day. They're still wrapped.

I haven't watched them at all. Welding Wild Ginger, Jesus has texted in to say, comment. I have 750 books, he says, and he claims that's enough to meet the legal definition of a library. Oh, that's cool. Cool. You know who I need to ask? My, take it easy, cubby, my cister. I wonder how many books she owns.

I wonder if it can top the 750 that welding while ginger Jesus has. in his home. My sister has. It's just, it's obscene. I'm so jealous. I want more books like that. They're so expensive, though. And my mother also is buried in useless, boring books. People that are telling me I can watch body double. I was going through a couple of my favorite movies from the 80s, and I loved angel avenging angel body double. People are telling me I can watch that on 2B or other things that I don't understand. So I can find these movies if I want to.

I'm like you, Ashley, though. I noticed when I bought all these movies when I was younger, that I never rewatched them. Comedy's all rewatched, but that's about it. So it just kind of became a waste of money. The only time I ever rewatched movies was when I didn't have Wi-Fi yet. When I lived in Minneapolis for a little bit, I was like, well, what the heck am I supposed to do?

I can't watch TV. I don't have Wi-Fi. And I thought, oh, my gosh, I have DVD. and I watched the Simpson movie, I think like 10 times a week at least. It's so boring. When your kid gets older, you'll likely show him some of your favorite movies. We've rewatched some of those. I'm so excited to do that.

I'm really excited. I've told my husband I want him to grow up on like the cartoons we used to watch. So I'm excited him to play like Rugrats, Looney Tunes, stuff like that. I still rewatch movies all the time. My God, once a week I watch Tombstone or Young Guns. Didn't you say you were going to send us some links on this Emmett guy? I don't see anything. Oh, I sent him to Josh and Ashley.

I don't know if you know. Do you want me to send it to your email? Yeah, he doesn't. I want to see what this guy's got. Okay. So someone's like, oh, you guys are talking a lot about DVDs. Do you like CDs? I do.

Yeah, I also love CDs. Get back to us with more on that. Yes, we love CDs. We love CDs. Especially fitness CDs. If I could listen to a fitness CD. Why do you ask, text us, why do you ask if we like CDs? Was there a movie or a concert movie, if that's how you say it,

that you watched regularly when you were a kid? Yes. Regularly. What was it? There's a couple. Spaceballs, watched that a ton over and over and over. and the movie RAD, the BMX movie RAD. We watched that a ton.

Okay. Mine was Tommy Boy. Watch the heck out of that. That's a good one. When I was in junior high and high school, just about every day when I got home from school, I would watch Kiss Animalize Live, which was a concert they released in 1985 of them playing a live show in Detroit.

And my pal Dane almost. every day for three or four years. We would go back to my house after school and watch that concert VHS tape. We knew every, it was sick. And then actually, maybe towards the end of high school, we flipped over to Guns and Roses Live from the Ritz, which came out in 88. We would also squeeze in our regular cartoons,

you know, things like Tom and Jerry was a, big one. But I don't know. I don't know what it says about me, but every single day, we would watch at least some of that kiss or Guns and Roses live concert footage. I watch a lot of that on

YouTube now. I've been watching a lot of it. That's very easy to do now. I've never wanted to tell you guys because I thought you would be disappointed in me, but I absolutely hate live music like that. Like listening to it on YouTube or on DVD. I hate the crowd noise.

I hate the sound quality. I just, I can't do it. Sometimes the sound quality sucks, but other times it's great. You don't like live music? No, well, like if I'm in person, yeah, absolutely. But listening to a live record? Nope, never liked it. That's one of my favorite things in the whole world is a live record.

You don't like the little differences or? Exactly. Really? Really, the crowd noise? You don't like when they really get into a certain part of a song? You don't like that? No, I hate it. I think you might be out of your friggin' mind.

Okay, we got an update. Somebody texting earlier and asked us our thoughts on CDs. All of us were very favorable on CDs. And he just wrote back, CDs nuts. That's just rude. Rood. Batchard, low-life, sneaky. Why do we fall for that every time?

Underhanded, classless. Ashley, you've never heard the intro to Iron Maiden's live record rock in Rio. I don't believe so. Well, I probably have because I imagine we've played it here. It will change. I'm surprised. They hit the, there's what, 120,000 people at the show or something, Iron Maiden.

This was on their brave new world tour. This is 25 years ago. There's 100 some odd thousand people there. They hit the intro music and it becomes, the crowd becomes so loud. It sounds like a war is happening. And then somehow they get even loud. and it's one of the coolest things I've ever heard.

We've got to spend more time together. I can't understand anybody who doesn't like live music on record, whether you're listening to it on a boom box, on a Walkman, whatever, on your cell phone, oh my damn. I guess I've seen a couple videos of things like that,

and that usually sends chills down my spine, but I think it's because I can physically see it. And I'm like, oh my gosh. Like, look at how happy the artist is and how excited the crowd is. I think I might need that visual to go along with it. So even bands you love. Yeah, I will always skip their live song if they have one on the album.

That's, yeah, that's weird. I used to buy those all the time. Anytime a band I liked had a live CD, I wanted to listen to that immediately. Oh, yeah. 93X. Ah, air conditioning, the love of my life. Uh-oh. That doesn't sound good.

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