Almost Athletes with Dude Perfect - Dude Perfect: NHL Mascot Draft, Millennial Vs. Gen Z Trivia, & Taco Bell Marathon | Full Episode

Episode Date: October 15, 2025

The Dudes are back with some wild stories and hilarious hot takes! From the biggest news in NCAA Football, the NFL, and MLB Playoffs to a deep dive into a Marathon where the runners need to stop at 10 Taco Bell restaurants! Plus, they celebrate the start of the NHL season with a NHL mascot draft, and then Intern Jackson stops by to see who knows trivia better, the Millennial Dudes or their Gen Z Intern. Which generation do you think won? Comment down below! What to do now: 1. Smash that LIKE button 2. Hit SUBSCRIBE so you never miss a DP podcast moment 3. Drop a comment with who YOU want to see on Almost Athletes next! Subscribe for more! ‪https://www.youtube.com/@almostathletes⁠ • • • • Almost Athletes with Dude Perfect is (almost) a sports podcast. Tune in weekly to hear the dudes’ hottest sports takes, great debates, interviews with your favorite athletes and entertainers, and hilarious BTS from all things Dude Perfect. New episodes drop every Wednesday. Follow along on all platforms. Listen to the pod on your morning commute or wherever it finds you: Apple: - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/almost-athletes-with-dude-perfect/id1834502483 Spotify: - https://open.spotify.com/show/55gaQm31JIbp6td7QtYsPU?si=6423db3118ac497f Follow Almost Athletes to keep up with the Dudes!: https://www.instagram.com/almostathletes https://www.tiktok.com/@almostathletes https://x.com/almostathletes_ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Would you consider this an athletic feat or an almost athletic feet? Almost. What's it? Because no one considers eating a lot of Taco Bell and running fast to sport. It's just like, yeah, I was kind of impressed. Welcome to Almost Athletes with Dude Perfect, A Wave Original. I'm Garrett. I'm Sparky.

I'm Ty? Welcome, T. Honestly, last week was, it was rough for me. It was. I just, I'm typical, I'm used to you. sitting here, dude, and you put tall man, heavy man in the seat. Is that what we've transitioned to? He's not the tall guy anymore?

He's the heavy guy? Well, I don't know. It's just currently, he might not be in a week. He said he's working on it. I loved the weigh-in a bit. You don't want to weigh me right now. I just ate, I just ate lunch 10 pounds of steak. I had habachi.

Yeah, he didn't do like the most comforting pre-show. I actually feel pretty great. I got a sweatshirt on. You look cozy. Habachi. You're comfortable. You're getting sick? What do you?

I do have a little bit of a... I got a little something going on. Okay. But I'm okay. Don't, no fear. I mean, we're good. What are you operating at percentage-wise? Body battery, I'm going to say, says 54%.

Fifty-four percent. Dude, I'm up to 75. My body battery actually is 51%. See, we're about... We're not too different. Sparks, what do we got today? Coming up today, boys, battled through some sickness.

We have football and firings. We're going to bring in intern Jackson and... Tim Holt is going to talk a little hockey. Plus, we're going to play some games. Garrett, you finally get revenge on your top 10 list. And we're going to do some more millennial versus Gen Z, actually, when Jackson joins later. So, without further ado, boys, let's Almost Athletes.

Did you guys have an Almost Athlete moment this weekend? Yeah, I couldn't get out of bed Saturday. That was a problem. Sick as a dog. Partly, I think, because of Friday's performance by my mean green. I think his heartache. I was worried about you, man. I was texting you during the game. I was already in Aggie land. And then I wake up to Sparky

story on Instagram. Flew season one, Sparky, zero. It's tough way. I was like, man, he's down hard. Oh, I didn't think I'd be here. In fact, I was, I was looking up to the good Lord saying, you know, if I go, let's do it quickly. That's where I was. I need to have a moment of honesty. It's not really an almost athlete moment, but it is one of those where it's like you should know better. I'm on day six of aphrine use. I thought you were only supposed to do a day. I know. That's why I felt like I needed to come clean. You almost athleteed the aphrine use?

Six days. Six days straight. That's how, that's what's going on up here. Just build up, back up. I just, all lanes closed. I prioritize breathing over my own health, which is kind of a weird, like you could go deep into that because if the afrin ends up killing me, I mean. But then again, if you don't breathe, you're not going to live that long.

I got sick. 17-hour sleep session on Saturday. I had to forego football, which is very tough for me. One of the best college states of all time. I watch Exendo highlights. 17 hours. 17 hours. That's a lot of sleep.

Yeah, it was like my PlayStation hard reset. Like, I implugged it from the wall, everything. But I'm here today because of it. Wow. Well, I'll tell you what. You missed one heck of an Aggie game. How's that? Dude.

I am I'm a fan of this team Wow They got me believing And being a believing Aggie It Ty Let's just see who it is

I don't know who it is You're supposed to do not disturb it That's your doctor saying Hey is you affron six days It's Thomas Allen I don't know who it is Should you answer it? No no no

No Thomas can leave a voicemail Speaking of if you haven't left us a voicemail Go ahead Send us one 972805 886 A terrible voicemail number.

We couldn't get anything that was like remotely close to D.P. or dude or anything? If you want my honest answer, I think the team putting this together took the first available. I mean, they had to get it so fast and they were like, yep, I like that number. 8.05, 8866. Can you make a jingle to that? No. And call, see if you can make up a jingle real quick to that number. Call 9-7-2.

You guys know, Gary. 8-5. covered for Chase. He made the number. 8-866. Oh, so this is your brother's undoing. 805. 8-8-6-6! I didn't like that one. I didn't either. But hey, it might get stuck in people's head.

We'll work on it. We'll come up with a jingle for the phone number later. Anyways, yeah, eggs look good, dude. They look... Good for us. I will say this. I've been getting a couple emails. I will address this publicly. One email I read was my disdain.

What a word. What a word. Disdain for refs. The only referees I feel bad for criticizing are the kids. That's it. If you're getting paid real money. How many kid refs are there? Well, for every youth sports game.

God, I thought you're talking at a professional level. No, no, no. Do you have a disdain for youth to refs? I don't. You're digging a hole right now, Gary. You're just digging. No, I said a story a couple weeks ago about it was a learning moment for both me and the refs.

The kid refs. Of course. It was a learning moment. Yeah, it was a good learning moment for a professional referee. But they called a good game at A&M. So I'm going to give them props. Wow. Bookmark that moment right there.

The first of its kind, maybe the last of its kind. Gary. I was going to say, because they did you dirty on your U and T. Yeah, they did. Yeah, they did. You were right. You were right. There was a praise and a...

I don't think you should apologize, Garrett, because that's been you since I've known you. I'm not, again, I'm not apologizing to the professionals. Just the kids. But hey, if you're a kid out there wanting to get into the ref game, stay at it, take the criticism at stride. You're doing a good job. Or take my advice and get out while you. It's a dangerous profession, man. It's going to be all robots in a year.

Anyways, firing, huh? Yeah. Luckily, nobody in this office, at least as of yet, James Ranklin gone. Penn State. Happy Valley, not so happy anymore, but it was time. Back-to-back weeks is 20 plus point faves About 49 million Over how many years is that

It's over six years Okay I saw he's gonna Whoa Dude mid-sid Tie going from a typical A blocker to like Dude I just I just That's a good poor I'll give you that

This is unbelievable I'm sipping way too quick by the way today I just have a I've almost killed my whole coffee mug So it's over six years 49 million six years he's going to make $15 a minute in this buyout. Well, that will get you an eight-count nugget.

Yeah, we need to start building in buyouts of our contract here at Dude Perfect. Like, if I go, I want to get paid $15 a minute. That sounds fun. We actually already told my CEO this morning, I'm going to renegotiate my contract with a buyout. If I'm not doing a good job, you have to fire me and pay me 30 mil. More people should do that. Sounds correct. Like, you know, everyone's kind of dogging the coaches for this.

Good on the coaches. He gets to sit at home, chill? Actually, we need a new sales guy here. Should we go get Franklin? He seems like he knows how to sell himself. He should probably sell some dude perfect stuff. Are we still paying Jimbo or has he been paid? Dude, I think we're paying Jimbo till 2038.

Really? It's that far in advance. I actually have no idea, but it was $76 million. Yeah, no, but my question is, do we already pay them or is that getting paid out over time? I don't know. I want to say it was over like a three-year deal, but what a deal. That was the largest buy-out.

out. Franklin's second largest of all time. Can you imagine if you're either of those guys? You're just doing whatever you want two years down the road and been like, oh yeah, 24 million you set my bank account. We're going to pay him until 2031. Oh, I was close. Okay. What a deal for that guy?

That's what I'm saying. There's just getting his contract. He's sitting down doing nothing, sitting on the couch, eating popcorn. Brilliant businessman. No, for sure. I'm telling you, dude. See, the college game has layers of problems. This being one of them.

Where's the incentive? For a college coach that he has a huge buyout right now. Why not? Just go ahead and let the cookie crumble, the snowball effect, and get paid. But why is there a buyout? Yeah, that's a good question. Like, it doesn't make any sense. Because they wanted him that bad.

When did we come with these like, oh yeah, we're just going to make, bro, I mean, have a little bit of, have a little, your school has, has some honor here. If you want to coach at my school, that's enough. That's enough of a honor for you. don't need $50 million if you get fired and don't do your job right. Had a buddy of mine reach out on Sunday. Kiwi. That's his PlayStation Network name. He's from New Zealand. So he checks out.

He's a New Zealand guy. He moved to the states at a young age. But he hit me Sunday with a hypothetical if Penn State comes calling, do you leave almost athletes? I think I do, boys. For the biot alone? Yeah. Bro, for the biot alone, you got to do it.

And I could see where Penn State would come calling for a spark. Just given what's going on at DP, if you haven't seen the recent episode, kind of did business over in Provo against a lot. number 14, BYU. We're hot commodities right now. You're back, by the way. If we had to buy out one of the dudes, who are we buying out?

Does everybody cost the same? No. No. Am I having to put up personal money? I don't know. It could be a go-fund me around the world. Cody Jones. We're buying out Cody?

No, actually, it's a twin. See, I think Cody... Oh, no. Get this guy some aphrine. Don't need any more. Okay, got it. I don't need any more. Okay.

I think Cody thinks he's... he's worth more than his buyout. Like he's just looking for that top dollar number that he doesn't command. Let's let the people decide our buyout. Comment, comment below on any social channel. What should each dude's buyout be when we renegotiate this contract?

Wow. Let the people go to bat for us. That's good. And make him respectable. Yeah. We've been at this for 17 years, okay? I don't want to see a $10 buyout for Garrett Hilbert, you know? Give me at least 50. Yeah.

Give me at least a meal. chick-fil-a? It's a twin, though. That's the answer. Because you have two of them. And they're basically the same person. Yeah. You know what I mean? You can definitely live without one. We've always had that argument. Not that I want to live without one. No, but if you need to live without one, this is a hypothetical debate. I'm not saying this is actually happening. Yeah. Dude, the number's right. All volunteers tribute. Buy me out. Depends on the time of year. You catch me in November, middle of November, when the ruts on. Your number's lower to buy out. You take a low buyout.

I could be convinced, you know. And you can text tie at. Drop the personal. It's at the 805-88-66. Dude. Was that it? That's it. That's it.

Is it? Or did I get them backwards? No, it's definitely that. Maybe that is a really good voicemail number and we didn't realize it. Maybe. We still need to work on the jingle, though. The jingle lacks. Yeah, it does.

You know what else lacks? I'm going to write a song to our voicemail jingle. You're good at that. Thank you. an act for that. Something that didn't go well this weekend. It's a bad football weekend for your boy Sunday. I like the Cowboys had one for the taking there.

Do we tossing in the towel on these boys six weeks in? Cowboys need to lose out. They do. I think it's in the best interest of the Dallas Cowboys to lose out. I cannot bring myself just a sparky at home on a Sunday to cheer against them. I just can't. I can't do it. But what if we're just a couple guys coming back from injury away?

We can't throw in the towel yet. You know me, Tyler. I'm the most glass half full. guy. And you want to throw it the town in? You already threw it? I'm with Garrett in the sense that I think it's in the best interest for the Dallas Cowboys to lose a lot of football games.

Because then we'll win. It's the worst spot to be in professional sports. And that's when you're riding that midline of you're not bad enough to get a top 10 pick and you're not good enough to be a playoff team. It would be different if we were like low to medium grade on defense and then offense was like in the same realm. But the fact that we're playing offense at the level that we're excruciating.

It's like how do you throw in the towel? If you had a competent defense. Eagles may be the most boring football team to watch of all time. I agree with that. Yeah, when they did the four consecutive. I mean, I, I've never been. Makes me sick. Just completely against the T push, but I think I'm there.

After watching that get run four times in a row. And on the fourth one, somebody on the defense got hurt too. I'm like, that's not, that's not football. Yeah, it's really not. they're changing our kickoffs. They're doing a lot of things to our football right now. Stop touching our football. Dude, they're letting people wear bobbleheads out there.

That's wild. It's a weird look. Yeah. I mean, more power to them. They want to protect their brains. I get it. Maybe I would too. But it looks funny,

and I can't get over it. Should we start? They look like they got big heads. They're also just really small guys. And so it looked different on the linemen. You don't see any big guys wearing them. No, because that's not like a big guy wearing sleeves during the cold.

Like, Lyman don't wear sleeves during the cold. because they're setting the tone. Let's start wearing guardian caps around the office. Let me see. Just to get people normalized to it. And there's not a lot of brain power left for me. I think it's in my best interest. You got to protect what you got.

Exactly. I actually like wearing the guardian caps around the office. Protective measure. Scataboo could use one. He really could. He loves using his head. I love that guy. Yeah, he's fun, isn't he?

He's fun to watch. It's a great time. Someone argues the best month of sports, man. Yeah. This is the crossover you get right now? I think it is. Yeah, we're going to talk a little NHO. with Timmy Holt

when he's on the show later. Also, you watch any of that 15-ending game? What a marathon. Yeah. That's a pressure-packed baseball. That's what I sign up for. This is why having the celebrity pitcher

come in and eliminates that. That's an hour and a half off that game. You're not going 15 and being like, if this goes 16, I'm going to bed. I can't handle it. Tough way to end your season, though. Bonus baseball. You go 15 innings, do or die, game five,

and then the Motor City kid, he's Detroit Tigers, just like that. Gone. I didn't know who to root for in that game. Oh, I did. Philly. also the elimination and the plate to plate too. That was a tough one too.

Why didn't you go to first? Yeah. It was just a panic mode. Yeah, it was absolute panic play of the century. Even if he makes it great throw, he's not getting that out. Yeah, that's one where the wiring and your brain just goes. Yeah.

You know. I say we get in a little almost sports moment of the week. Oh, do I have something for you? Catered towards Tyler too. No way. Have you heard of the Taco Bell 50K Ultra Marathon? No, but I think I want to hear about it. It sounds as fun and as dangerous as you would expect.

31 mile marathon. This takes place in Colorado, a 31 mile marathon. See, I don't love that. Runners stop at 10 Taco Bells and have to eat at least 9 of them and must finish in under 11 hours. I could do it. Could you? Yeah, Todd. I could do it.

100% I could do it. The weird part to me is you stop at 10, but only order at 9. That is weird. me. Where you kind of pencil in your, you don't like the look

of one and you're like, I think I better pass on this one. Yeah, dude, bro, you cannot get the runs running a marathon. Well, I don't,

that doesn't happen to me with T-Bel ever. It would if you stopped at that 10th Taco Bell. I'll alternate my order. Cheesy Cordita Crunch to start, beefy five-layer burrito

no sour cream. Scroll up a little bit. Doritos Low Coast Taco and I'm just going to rotate those three. How much do you have to eat? Just, I'm sure one

entree, one meal. Yeah, you would win that challenge out of the dudes. No question. I'd get second. I'm saying who else is doing that? Like, those aren't real marathoners.

No. No, that's your joke. I like my chances just winning it straight up. Okay, this changes it up. You have to have certain types of foods. A chalupa at stop four and a burrito supreme at stop eight. Yeah.

Not using any indigestion-related meals. I love how they throw that in there. I wouldn't need them. Why would I need that? Do we know the winning time? Can I get some, I just need a little math check here. You gotta bring the receipts as proof as well. So a marathon, that's five miles over a marathon. So 31 miles.

Oh dude, you're not winning this. No, you're not winning this. Why? Sage finished in four hours and 28 minutes. That's you running a basically nine and a half minute pace. Oh, that's easy. Nine and a half minutes. I can almost walk a nine.

and a half minute mile. You couldn't. Yeah, but you're not while you're stuffing your mouth with a state grilled cheese burrito. Absolutely, I could. I could Doritos, Locos, Taco, I guarantee you, I could do it today. I could go beefy five-layer burrito and run a sub-seven-minute mile while I finish the whole thing. Sure, you can run a seven-minute mile. You ain't running 31 of them.

I don't have to do it at seven. I could do it at nine and a half. But you have to have the time to stop at nine Taco Bells in order. Surely they're running. They've got some kind of a special service where, say, if you're running in the marathon, you can order quick here. Sure, but it's still taking time. Unless I call ahead.

We've got to sign you up for this because now I just want to know. I think, I really think I, nine and a half, guys, that is so slow. It's not, not for that long. It's not. I think I could, yeah, I'm about to make a bold statement. I think I could do it today. No training. Nine and a half minute.

Miles, I could go do it right now. You couldn't. I'm saying take the taco. Bell out of it. No, I'm saying you couldn't run 31 mile at 930 pace. I could. That's a slap in the face to every person who goes to Denver, Colorado every year. Oh, pace per mile. 837. There's the thing. I, what is it? 837. That's faster. Yeah. I'm just saying there's a big difference in eight and a half minute miles and nine and a half minute miles. Sure. That's a huge difference. Yeah, I know. And think what your tummy's talking. Wack to your fifth Gordita. That's where I thrive.

That is where you thrive. That's what I'm saying. I don't, that's where you thrive. I don't, Regestion medicine. What are we talking about? I ran six miles this morning at a 905 pace. And if you wanted me to eat a chalupa doing that, no. And you're a sauce guy. What are you going to do with no, you're going to sauce it still? I'll just, I'll straight to mouth sauce. Straight to mouth? Make me sick. Do you train for the food part? Do you train for the habachi that I had for lunch because I'm a high octane guy and I thrive on stuff like Taco Bell. Do you train for the food part or just the running? No need. But I live trained. I wouldn't have to do anything different. He does this training every weekend. Yeah. You are built for this. Would you consider this an athletic feat or an almost athletic feat? Almost.

What's it? Because no one considers eating a lot of Taco Bell and running past a sport. It's just like, yeah, that was kind of impressive. Do you bathroom break it at all? I wouldn't need to. No, you don't have time at an 837 pace. Plus, I'm burning that stuff off. Dude, that Doritos Locos Taco by the time it hits the bottom of my stomach,

that energy expenditure's been used. This feels like you're biting off more than you can chew here. I agree, dude. It's not. The blow up. There's going to be a blow up somewhere. Over the course of 31 miles? There wouldn't be. Dude, you can't even travel in a car 31 miles without a Bucky's break for a bathroom. Sign me up. I didn't sign them up. When is it? What is it? What is it?

When is it? We're going to Denver, Colorado. Let's film it. It's a new main channel video. See, that's scary though, too. Altitude. Denver, Colorado. Altitude. Can we not do this at sea level? There's not a Taco Bell C level run. Bro, I'm sure we can create one right here at our hometown. This has to be televised. Oh, look at them go, dude.

Oh, man, this gives me indigestion. But this is where I thrive. This is like my cheat code, is they don't know that I wouldn't have eaten that voluntarily today. It wouldn't have even been a challenge. Good news is, Ty, you got a year to prepare. Look at that route. That's 31 miles.

That's around a whole county. Oh, oh, hey, go to that down to the race rules and zoom in. H. Course cut. By the four stop, all entrance must have consumed at least one chalupa. Crunch wrap. Easy. That's my go-to, crunch wrap. So it was on Saturday, October 4th.

It was on, okay. Okay, it was last weekend. I got a year to prepare here. By the eight. A burrito supreme or nachos bell grande. I'd probably go burrito supreme just because it's going to be easier to eat on the run. Drinks do not count as food. That's fine.

I still will drink a little bit just to stay hydrated. Good news, Ty. It says no on course pepto or seltzer butt. Dude, your aphrine is good to go. Good. Affron will be okay. I'll be able to breathe. I love it.

Number nine in all caps. Survivors will eventually get a commemorative item. The WD rate by mile 15 has got to be 50%. Dude. Oh, look at 10. Once you are SVP, you are in. This is like the goblet of fire. That's incredible.

A little HP reference there. Do you can't back out. You want to take part in this. consuming Taco Bell. I'll do the Diablo challenge too. Lather all items

with Diablo sauce. Call me crazy. I think the fire sauce is hotter than the Diablo. Dude, the Baja blast challenge. Ooh. That's true.

A aggregate of two liters. Two liters of B blast? This is disgusting. Without vomiting? Yeah. I can bury the whole run? That would be just my water. Sparks,

remember when I told you a couple, was it last week that we talked about Disney and I was like, man, the people over in Asia, they just take health seriously? Sure. It's because they don't have Taco Bell marathons.

Yeah. What are we doing? You're not seeing many Tokyo Taco Bell 50Ks. Should we go to the hotline? We are going to go to the hotline. That's what I said. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Ty.

I want to go to the hotline. [phone]. No. I don't know how to say 9-7-2 though. Gosh, our callers are about to be calling their local... 8-8-6-6-6. They're going to be calling their local U-Hull. The 972 just throws it off.

I'll come up with a jingle. You have till next week to come up with a jingle. Give me, let me, I need a picture of the phone number because I obviously won't remember it because it's a terrible voicemail number. Well, the good news is you can also find the number at almostathletes.com if you ever get lost, Tyler. All right, let's listen to it. All right, let's listen to voicemail. Hey, dudes, this is Tyler from Port Orange, Florida. I just want to call in and ask you a question, but also tell you that I'm really enjoying the podcast.

I guess myself humming or singing the almost athletes intro music most days. My question is for Garrett. Garrett, since you are so upset at the ESPN rankings of the top 10 athletes since 2000, you make us a new list of who you think would be the top 10 athletes from 2000. Thanks, dudes. So next time. Take it easy. Thank you, Tyler from Florida.

Thank you a brand new list. Well, here's the deal. You didn't get the whole list wrong, but we can go ahead and eliminate a couple off the list. Roger Federer. You're gone. Love you. I've never met you probably a great dude. Not going to be there.

Might be a bad dude. Serena, love you. You're not the number two athlete. Well, she's probably top ten, though. Again, this is a bigger discussion. It's a large discussion. I have a different view of what an athlete is. She broke the all-time record.

In one sport. This one has gotten carried. Yeah, but dude. But again, I mean, when she was filming with this, dude, she was nailing some stuff. She's one of the greatest tennis players of all time. You just don't think tennis is a sport. I think tennis is a sport. Sorry.

Was this a top ten greatest tennis players of all time list? Athletic sport. I think it's an athletic sport. I don't think that means that you're one of the greatest top ten athletes. I didn't know you were so opinionated here. I didn't know this list was bugging you as much as it was as you as well. Sheesh. I mean, this guy has not been able to let it go.

If you cannot, the simplest, just look at what an athlete is, if you played two professional sports, you should be on the top 10 list. Well, again, this is from 2000. Okay. From 2000, which there are none. Yeah, except you're made up little like, you know, Russell Wilson getting drafted. No, those are fake.

I agree. Those are fake. I agree. Because you could play that game with almost any. Kyler Murray is a two-sport athlete. You could say that about any quarterback in the NFL. They could have all been pitchers. At the end of the day, you're going to go, this list is based off championships,

pretty much. Like, gold medals, Championships. Individual success. It's just how dominant were you in your sport is what this list is. And that's what it should be. I disagree. What should it be?

The top 10 athletes. Which is different. Since 2000. Sure. You put whatever parameters on it. Okay. So like would you say that like Otani, he's only been around for a couple years, makes this list? No, I think it'd be a little early to put Otani on there.

So there has to be some longevity to your list. I think that plays a factor a little bit. I don't disagree. Okay. I mean, I think you could make the argument. I mean, no one else has done what he's been able to do. So that's tough to not put him in the conversation. Yeah, I just feel like Tom Brady should be there.

I think LeBron James should be there. Yeah. I like Kobe Bryant. I like Tiger Woods. Michael Phelps should not be there. I mean, Michael Phelps, he can swim good. Yeah, swim good. is undervaluing what he's done?

I'm just saying. If that's the case, you got to take Simone and Usain Bolt off the board. Yeah, I agree. I mean, I'd love to see Usain Bolt do anything other than run fast. He almost made professional soccer. Did he? Yeah. Okay.

So that just shows you, I'm uneducated about Usain Bolt's athletic career. It also means he's an almost athlete. That's true. Yeah. He almost made Usain Bolt, almost athlete. Almost athlete. We'd love to have you on the pod. Fast, though. Gosh, he's quick.

Okay, so who you putting in the number one spot, T? This is you, G. I want you to take on your ship of this. Here's my number one top 10 athletes of since 2000. I think the first one is probably got to go. Joey Chestnut? I think you got to put, I think you got to put LeBron James number one. Wow.

I'm not a LeBron James guy either. Whoa. That actually surprises me, number one. But I do think, like, coming out of high school, like, what he's done for the sport, athletically, superhuman. Yeah, could have probably played a multitude of sports. Absolutely. Like, he's just a...

He should be number one. He's also won a ton of championships. He would have won more if he just would have stayed put, in my opinion. So he checked your boxes of personal success while also just being a freak of nature athlete. Yep, yep. Yeah, I think he's number one. Personally, this is not me like, I understand you're putting messy there for the World Cup win. But like, to me, Ronaldo is bigger and better.

Bigger, faster, stronger, jumps higher. That Ronaldo should be number two. Yeah, when Ronaldo skies for those headers, it's just different. Yeah, like he, and again, he's won everything for club and country except the World Cup. And he looks good doing it, which matters. Somehow that hair just says so. He did have a glow up. He had a glow up.

early man you days he was I got beat by two by four and you remember his statue that came out recently? Yeah yeah it was tough. That was tough. They were one of the worst. If we were making a top ten worst statues I've ever seen, I haven't seen ten,

but that would be number one. Oh yeah, I'm gonna go and it really stinks because like honestly like, shit tiger would be on the list? Yes. But should he be top five

considering like basically since 2010 he's been irrelevant? He won the 2019 Masters. Great. But dude, the dude just had his second. He's not a top 10 athlete of all time. I think he is. I think he is.

His 01 campaign will never be a match to the game of golf. I agree. They created the tiger slam because of him. I think the cherry on top was him coming all the way back in 18. 2019. Was it 19? Masters. Once he did that, it was like, hey, this guy's been through a lot.

You rewind back to that Thanksgiving night. Man, he was in trouble. Yeah, I'm going to put Tom Brady at three. Okay. I do think you got to put in, Ty's going to disagree with me here. Oh, gosh. But I do think Djokovic has got to be number four. Okay.

Here's why. Because he went against Federer and the doll. They played all at the same time, and he came out on top of the most grand slams. Does this top four look different if there is no date on it? Oh, yeah. 100%. Can I just hear your top three? No date? Yeah. Sure. Bo Jackson, Dion Sanders, and Michael Jordan. Okay. Do you hear what you needed to?

I did. I did. I did. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I agree. All right. Can carry on. Yeah. I mean, 100%. I mean, top three athletes of all time are those three. I just like there's a different criteria being used. Yeah, they put the 2000 marker here. And this is based off like what they've done for sports in general in their respective sports. Yeah. Okay. Athletes of all time, I agree. I don't know if these, like, I don't think

Djokovic is, I don't even know if he's in the top 50 athletes of all time. That's where I'm at. Yeah, okay. We agree. We agree. Okay. I mean, you're putting John Jones up there. That's what I was about to say. Like, John Bones Jones.

Like that dude could. I mean, that dude was dominant. Tell him he's not a top 10 athletes. See, that's the thing. You don't even want to do. Tell people. Tamika Catch you, she's not in top 10. The measure of pure heart and mental fortitude land you on the list because that seems to be a...

To be fair, if Mike Trout makes wins a World Series, is he in the top 10 athletes? See, I think I disagree with most people a little bit that, like, so if Messi never won the World Cup, now all of a sudden he's not on the list? He's number three because of the World Cup. But is he a less of an athlete if he doesn't win it? Yes. Yeah. Is he?

Yes. I see what you're doing, and I agree with you, but you have to have those personal accolades to be a quote-unquote top tenor. You do. You have to. You do. Let's keep moving down the list. Obviously, I feel like my boy, Kobe Bryant,

was a little bit disrespecting to this. Put Kobe at five. Okay. Where did you check in on the original 10? 10. Okay. Tiger 6. Call me crazy. I think he has completely,

he's not even done yet, but go put me power. Heidi Mahomes, seven. Fair. Another one of those guys who could have done some baseball. Yeah.

Is that Jackson or Patrick? Mahomes at seven. Patrick. Just wanted the clarification. Do a P. Mahomes in front. Just for clarification purposes. Thank you. Man, it's tough.

Just looking at the list, I mean, it's like, man, Randy Moss at 27 seems really low. Could argue the most gifted, talented receiver to ever play the game. That's what I'm saying. Like, it seems crazy low. But I do feel like Serena Williams should be in the top 10.

Okay. Put her at 8. And then to round out 9 and 10, the big German. Dirk. Good. So just interesting hypothetical here. You would say Dirk is a better athlete than Steph. No, but it's just I had to put Dirk there.

Personal preference. And yeah, I like where you did there. Curry, number 10. Okay. Which is Steph or Seth? Steph, which is interesting that's one or Aisha. Two. I got four MBAers in the top ten.

Yeah, you very basketball heavy here. No baseball. I mean, but baseball kind of does that to themselves. No MMA. No racing. No boxing. No boxing. No money mayweather.

Yeah, that's, that's, there's a whole aspect of boxing that can make you question whether or not. Yeah. There should be more of those in the. If he didn't go off the rails, Connor McGregor in the top 10. Yeah. Anyways, that's my list.

Feel free to roast it. I feel better. I feel better about this list. Good. All right. I can't handle this anymore. I say we bring in Temi and we talk a little hockey. Garrett,

the holidays are approaching and admittedly, I cannot wait to see what you got me. I'm not going to lie, Sparks. I haven't even thought about it. But when I do, you bet I'll get it from Wayfair. I always toast a lot during the holidays. and Wayfair has everything I need to keep my guest coming back. Who's your favorite house guest?

Probably my brother, Chase. I actually thought you were going to say me. Sorry, buddy. He always brings me donuts. And I've been able to buy all new bedding, towels, and even a new mattress at Wayfair.com for the next time Chase stays over. Wayfair is the ideal place to settle back into the end-of-season routine. They have all sorts of Christmas decoration from trees, stockings, wreaths.

Actually, I've already hung stocking at my apartment. Whether you're hosting your whole family or your friends, Wayfair's got you covered with fast free delivery, which will help out when I need to buy you a last second gift, Sparky. Thank you, Gare. They've got a huge selection of house items in every style, so there's tons of fun stuff I would want, like maybe a new couch, hint hint. That seems like a huge gift. They always have items for every budget, so maybe I'll get you a, maybe a new coffee mug that has a couch on it. Get organized, refreshed, and ready for holidays for way less. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home.

That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R-com. Wayfair, every style, every home. Time for Block B, boys. Happy to be joined by the lead singer of Brooks and Dunn, Tim Holt. Pleasure being here. No, I'm kidding. He's not the lead singer of Brooks and Dunn.

He has a far more important job. Lead editor, correct? Hopefully I didn't mess that up. I had something like that. What's the official job title? Senior editor. VP of Post. Oh, VP of Post production.

V-P attached to your name. Who's their key? Who's the P of Post? Yeah. The what? The P? You're the VP. Who's the P's the president of chief?

I'll go ahead and take that job. I'm the president of post. Yeah, we need one. That's crazy. We have a VP, but no big P. Do you think you'll apply for the president? I would love to apply for the president job. We actually have like multiple VPs in our company, but no president, which is weird.

I've always thought it was weird, but I'm glad to be here. Congratulations on the new job, too. Have you watched the pod before? I have. I'm a big fan of the pod. No way. I'm really glad to be here. If Tim said no, there, no, actually.

Here's the deal. If you heard the pod last week, I get to choose employee of the month. I'm going to go ahead and give you October. Yeah. Congrats. Employee of the month of October. We're only halfway through it, too. I was about to say, he could just mail it in for the rest of the month.

Yeah, but he's, see, his character won't mail it in. But it's like the James Franklin buyout. What's Tim's incentive now? He could just go and completely butcher the next edit. He's already got employee of the month. Yeah, if you want to just. No, no, I'm not going to mail it in. You can.

You can, though. You can. You already have the award. You can walk around the office and literally just rub it in people's faces and just be like, and just sit and eat popcorn. That's what we love about Himmathy, though. He doesn't, he's not the rub in your face kind of guy. Yeah. You know, he does things with class, with etiquette. And we're approaching a big date coming up. Is it next week? No, it's this week. It's this week. Yeah, Friday. 10 years Friday. 10 years on Friday. 10 years with us on. When you originally took the job of Dude Perfect, did you think you'd still be around 10 years later?

I had no idea. I didn't think Dude Perfect would be around 10 years. Definitely no. Would you remember like what the first month? Like what were some of the first things that we did when you first joined? So very, so I did a freelance shoot with you guys first. Slipp and slide football battle.

I remember this, dude. Slip and slide football battle. Yeah. It got heated on set. Of course. It was great. We had a drone fall out of the sky I mean it was wild

But yeah Did a little freelance shoot Then the edit and then came on On a contract gig Wow So I was let's see That was October And then first day was day one

Of the TV show Season 1 Wow So I walked in there's like 40 people in there And I'm like man this is insane That was no episode I can't remember what the first episode was That was our first episode wasn't it

Yeah Yeah it was crazy So technically Jared's been here 10 years too Yeah, yeah, kind of. Just a long lunch break. Yeah, long lunch break. You were really hurting for cash if you stuck around after slip and slide battle.

Yeah, I mean, I was looking for a job. I mean, I was, you know. Yeah, I was, I was needed to. Climb the mountain, though, which is fitting for you because you are a climber, but to start is from freelance to contractor to a premium MVP candidate. The mountain is not done yet. President. Yeah, and I got the eye on the prize.

We need to lose that V. Yeah. And in fact, just call it the commander. in chief of editing because it hits a little different. It does. Sounds good. You're our residential hockey expert around the office. You got to play some hockey, very envious of that.

Sue grew up in the Lone Star State. Don't get that quite a kind of thing, or lacrosse for that matter. But before we talk hockey, let's talk hair. Did you have hair 10 years ago? I did. This job did steal my hair. Let's see it.

Actually, you need to probably leave for this segment. No, I feel great. Yeah, I'm really jealous of ties. What? What? It's gray. His are grays. But if Lovar Ball didn't take the BBB, the Big Baller brand, that would be us.

We could start Big B, B, B, B, B, but it would be Big Bald brand. That would be sick. Of course, the guys with no hair want to point out the gray's in my hair. Well, there's gray. I'm just saying, there's gray. Yeah, I get it, dude. I'm 36. I can't wait for the day that I have a salt and pepper beard.

I don't know why you're complaining about the grays because I'm ready for a salt and pepper beard. Really? Yes, dude. You're ready to look like Lavechkin? All those NHL players with the salt and pepper beards, I mean, man, Guys, another intro to Tim, I think if you type in Dallas Stars, is it just Dallas Stars? Yeah, or Stars fan? It's just Dallas Stars.

Type in Dallas Stars GIF? Yeah. There he is. There he is. He's right there. Right there in the middle. That's just one of them. Yeah.

You're in there, too. I am. Yeah, with one of them. I'm pretty sure it's, it's the world. You have an otherworldly ability to stare down a camera and make the camera feel uncomfortable. Yeah. You don't feel

uncomfortable. You make the camera. It's crazy the ability you have to do that. Anytime I go to a sporting event, I always try and, you know, find the camera that's closest to me

that's throwing people up on the Jumbotron. And if I make eye contact with any of them, I game over. I got him in the bag. And then as soon as he points it at me, you just go to town.

You do have a knack knack for finding the Jumbo or the Jumbo finds you. The Jumbo find him. I don't think he finds it. There was a stretch where we were going to a bunch of Stars games

and I was like, every single time on the jumbo, every single time. Is that hard walking around in public being such a public figure? I mean, I don't know if I want to be known for that, but I mean, I'll take it. How do you deal with that? I love getting on the jumbo. You do? It's just a good time.

And you certainly love hockey? I am a diehard hockey guy. Before we get started in the hockey, we ask every guest on the pod, do you have an almost athlete moment? This is so great because since Epp 1, I've been thinking about my almost athlete moment. Yes. Wow. And I got one. All right.

Hit me. senior year right before the state championship in high school ice hockey. We're warming up behind the rink, okay? You know, three hack-wack. You ever play three-hack-wack? I have no idea what you just said. I don't know three-hack-wack. All right, three-hack-wack is where you juggle a hacky-sack three times,

and then on the third one, you hit it at your teammate. If you get hit and you drop the hacky-sack, then you're out. You got whacked. Yeah, you got whacked. Okay. We played this game with a soccer ball. And so it was like three-hack-wack-wack-wack, but with a soccer. So I went up to whack the soccer ball broke my hand in warm-ups before the game.

But you're kicking the soccer ball. Well, yeah, but then you hit it with your hand for the three-hack. You're whacking it after. Yeah, three-hack and then whack. Yeah. And a whack. Yep. You overwhacked.

So I went for the whack at the soccer ball. Boom. Broken hand. Didn't tell coach, didn't tell mom. You played? Oh, yeah. That's hockey. You're hockey baby.

Tim. Went into the locker room, taped up my two pinkie. Fingers was like, it's fine. They would have made you do the Conway. Yeah. You'd tell me you won state. Yeah, we want state. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about, dude.

But it was pretty bad. I mean, I was very... Did you not have very... Did you know, I drink lots of milk, but, I mean, it was just a good three-hack-hack- Just like a soccer ball whack wouldn't do that. Leave it to the hockey players to have an almost athlete moment ends in a state championship. Yeah.

It's true. I'm impressed him. Yep. That was my almost-athlet moment. Not a lot to talk hockey. Honestly, stars are going to win it all. I mean, they look. Amen.

Unbelievable. They look ridiculous. Did you watch any, Ty? Yeah, but we always look ridiculous, and then we kind of go through a little slump. And then we're like, oh, my goodness, we're peaking at the right time. Oh, we're in the playoffs. I think we're going to make it to the Stanley Cup finals. We lost.

Kick him out. Kick him out. That's how it goes every year. First of all. Get me to the finals, baby. Sadly, he's not wrong. I know exactly what Ty's saying. It's time to see.

I've seen this movie. We need to see some proof in the hood. Interesting question. brothers asked me on our text thread the other day, which I'm curious to know your thoughts. Do you think other teams, like we started out with the Jets and the Aves? And those teams, when you just say that around the hockey world are like, man, those are tough games. Tough matchups. To hold some weight on the road.

Now when people say, oh, we got to play Dallas. Where do we rank on that? Do we rank, like, are people like in Winnipeg being like, do we got to play Dallas? I think in the last five years, they're sure. They are. Historically, no. We have that kind of aura for us.

We're in that time period. Dallas is for sure in the top four teams in the Western Conference, without question, in my opinion. What's the name of the Colorado head coach? Jared Benar. After the game, do you hear what he said? They asked, like, are you excited to get another run at Dallas in a couple weeks? And he's like, I'm okay if we don't play him again this season.

And he kind of chuckled. And I was like, that's good to know. I mean, for Dallas to walk in to their barn and rant in to get the shootout winner, I mean, while the barn's booing. Special. That was an early season statement. Oh, yeah.

But to Ty's point. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Oh, it is. It's got a lot to do. Proven to do come postseason time. I said to play a little game. Yeah. Ranking the mascots.

Oh, NHL mascots? NHHO mascots. Let's go, okay. Fun, fun, fun, fun. Four-round snake draft. Can I just say, and I love hockey. I think it's the greatest sport in the world. Utah's mascot is ridiculous.

Hockey, I think, has the worst mascots by far. I mean, it looks like you walk in to a Chucky Cheese in 1970. 100%. When you look at these mascots. It feels a lot of toys are us. Oh, man. These are good. Wow.

Sparta Cat, I swear, he was at my birthday at Chucky Cheese in 1995. Oh, that was a good year. I was at that birthday party. He was there. Who's going first? I want to go first. Yeah. It's just like,

Does the mascot match the team? Is the mascot actually good at hockey? Actually just found this out. You know, go ahead. First draft. I'm taking Sparky right off the bat, which I had no idea that was the Isles. Mascot name. It makes sense.

You got to go there. Barky. Off the board. That's the best mascot in hockey. I would differ. So I go next. Fantastic name. Give me Wildwing.

Oh my gosh. This is shaping up great for me. Who's Wildlings? Ducks. I got a stick with... Dude, he was at my birthday. For the third one, give me... Give me gritty, baby.

Yeah, that's a really good pin. Give me gritty. I was going to feel like the... That was going to be the steal of the draft getting gritty at four would have been absurd. Probably the most famous hockey mascot, right? Without question. Yeah, without question.

And as much as we get on to Philly sports, they do mascots really well. The Philly fanatic in baseball, also an elite mascot. He's great. All right. Timmy? I think doesn't Detroit have Al the octopus? Yes, but not like an unofficial mascot.

Gotcha. The octopus is like the unofficial mascot of the wings, which, I mean, man, if they could capitalize on that, that would be huge. Do you know why it's an octopus, part? Why they throw octopus on the ice? No. Do you, Gary? No.

You know what I know. So do you want to say or do you want me to say it? Back in the day, it took eight wins to win a Stanley Cup. So each leg of the octopus was one win And that's why they throw them on the ice So would you throw it like a one-legged octopus After your first playoff win? So it was eight wins to win it

Somebody threw it on the ice And then the wings won eight straight Yeah So it was like Okay that's our thing I mean now they are desperately heaving octopuses Just for you guys to win Those guys are like

Give me a I'll sign up for five consecutive wins Just give me something Okay my first pick Oh man I was really hoping to pull gritty there. I'm not going to lie. I'm going to go a newer mascot here. I'm going to go Bowie. Seattle Cracken. Kind of looks like a weirdo, but man, that guy, see that guy. He looks like a troll. He looks like a troll. Yeah, a troll. No troll left behind. You're snake draft. Yeah. So I'm going to go, yep, so I go buoy and then I'm going to follow it up with

Victory Green. Yeah. What a good name to. Victory. I mean. I don't like them. I'm going to go with Moose. I'm going to go with Moose. Winnipeg. That's where I was headed. Okay, okay. I like their great creatures. Moose. They, you know, majestic.

And they would win some fights. Honestly, a moose is pretty hard to take down. And this is why you really want to be in the third or the fourth spot in this draft because it significantly falls off. It falls off hard. At this point. I mean, I think everyone on the top row gives me nightmares. Dude, I mean, what is that?

What is Harley the Hound? That guy looks. That looks like a sought-off version of the Kansas City Chiefs mascot. I don't even know what team that's for. That has to be from the 70s, and they just haven't bought a new mascot. Yeah, what team is that for? Calgary Flames. I was going to say, I do, that's disgusting.

That makes sense for the Flames. And that's why the Flames haven't won anything. Give me the Panthers. Panther. What's his name? Okay. Stanley C. Panther? Okay.

Sure. All right, Sparks, you got the next two. I already hate my team. Your team is getting just killed by mine, but that's fine. I can dance on you and beat you up. I'm going to go with Chance, Vegas. I like that pick, actually. Honestly, like, so ugly, he's lovable type thing there.

Is he an otter? He's a misfit. I don't know what that is. Okay. Chance? I feel like you should need to know what it is. It is before you pick it. That should be a requirement.

But that's part of the love I have for chance. Yeah, I agree. You have no idea what he is. Chance is great. Who else? Give me S.J. Give me Sharky. Yeah, okay.

Sharky. Sharky. That's a good pick. That's a sick. So I have a sparky and a sharky. I'll go Finn. Finn is Vancouver. Oh, Vancouver.

Vancouver. Yeah, you guys are missing out. Give me yuppie. Okay. Where's yuppie? Yeah. Montreal. Yep.

He just looks like me. Got it. Wow. Back in my 250 days. My team. Getting real Canadian on us here, Gare. I'm feeling great about my squad right now, y'all. Because I'm going Nash and Bernie.

Okay. I feel great about that. I can't stand Nash, but Bernie, sure. Yeah. I was going to go Shark and Nash, Sharky, but that was a good pick. Thank you. I appreciate that. Nash.

The name creativity lacks. This Hunter kind of give you some like. Ooh. Yeah, Hunter. It feels like he's getting a couple felonies. He's been through some stuff. Yeah. He saved for some things.

I'm going to go name. I'm going to go Norty. Minnesota Wild. Okay. Oh, it's a name play? Well, you know. What a horrible mascot. It just looks like that guy is carefree living.

You've got to live that way up in Minnesota. I feel like I should know more about our own mascot, but what is Victor? Is he a Martian? He's an alien. Because they're the stars. Got it. Makes sense. Yeah.

I think Ty, at this point, you just draft the devil and you move on. I do. I think just as a Christian you're not. allowed to like a devil mascot and they had Satan playing for him at one time which was just kind of it's just not good Bailey for your brother-in-law no I think I'm gonna go he doesn't like a slap shot here I like the Washington capitals eagle slap shot or saber tooth I mean look at that buck teeth on him I was kind of thinking Carlton he's got a fun name he's a polar bear yeah okay kind of ferocious yeah Carlton no is not ferocious it's not it's just not a fitting name

I don't know why he's called Carlton. I would love to be in the meeting on when they selected Carlton as the name. Yeah. Like what were the other options there? Somebody go iceberg here. I mean, he looks like a Muppet. Oh, it's just me. To end it.

Yeah. New Jersey Devil. N.J. Devil. Give them to me. All right, chat. Tell us who wins the mascot battle. There's no chance. Tommy Hawk.

I just saw that up at the top. I'm a big name guy. The name carries a ton of weight. Boston Bees, Blades would have been fun. I'm happy with my draft, though. I am. It sounds like you're really second-guessing every pick you made. Yeah, a little bit.

Who would win in a fight out of all these mascots if they were to drop the gloves? Oh, my squad, no question. I don't know, dude. Yuppie looks like a animal. You saying the people that play these characters or just the character in general? No, just the character in general. Do you guys watch the mascot showdown at the All-Star game? Because all these mascots like play three-on-three.

It's incredible. It's super funny. You're telling me the mascot suit up and play actual hockey? Oh, yeah, 100%. Every like All-Star weekend. Who won this last one, do you know? They do Eastern versus Western. I can't remember who won the last one, but it's fun.

It's a good, it's a good. Do they check? Comedic watch. Oh yeah, it gets pretty intense. Dude. You can imagine what Gritty's doing out there. I mean, he is just going to town. Yeah, he's a game misconduct kind of guy, Gritty.

I think my wins in a fight. I think my team, my squad takes you down. I'm making the championship at least. Just an actual hockey? Well, I mean, if we're just, you know, if it's a four-on-four attorney. I'm saying if you meet mine behind it in an alleyway, you should be scared.

I have a polar bear shark and a panther. I kind of like my chances. But I got gritty. Gritty looks like he eats those things for breakfast. You know what? If I just look at what each mascot is, I think I'm in trouble. Because I've got a dog, an alien,

a weird Sasquatch. And a saber-tooth is, you know, not bad. Yeah. You know, whatever that is. Timmy, before we let you go, I need some Stanley Cup predictions. Who's coming out of the east? Who's coming out of the West and who's raising the cup? You heard it here first on the almost athletes pod.

Coming out of the east, the Panthers. Again? For the fourth year in a row. They did look good, though. Losing to the Western team. The Detroit. They're in the Eastern Conference. You're going to say the a half, I know it.

The Dallas Stars. No. We get it. done. I think it's their year. It's our year, dude. It's our year. We don't even have our captain playing. Wait until he comes back. Yeah. I'm going by the Stanley Cup Take his back. Let's get him on. Yeah, that's how confident

I am. I felt it. Tim said it. It was a pleasure. We'll check in in a couple weeks with you. Cool. Enjoy your Employee of the Month award. Yeah. Earned it. You earned it. I'm honored. Everyone is proud of that one. Timmy Holt. Timmy Holt. Thank you. Thanks, y'all. Welcome Action Jackson to Block C.

Yeah. Thanks, guys. Let's go. I'm not going to lie. Not arousing ovation. I'm not going to lie. I had a lot of people. I'm dead serious. A lot of people say that Jackson should be a regular.

Really? Uh-huh. I had a lot of people tell me that that was their least favorite episode. Whoa. Did you really? It was best of me. You're lying. No one said that.

That was a fire. I actually enjoyed it. I became dumber during that segment, but I did enjoy it. The leader of Gen Z. Yeah. Kysonette. Jackson, Haltim. Haltim.

Here on the C segment. Good to have you, dude. Do you feel like your hair is, you would say, you mock people? So, so here's the thing about my hair. You know that scene in Interstellar where he's like,

no, no, like he's like, yeah, I do know that scene. That's like me, whenever I'm sitting in that chair getting my hair bleached. Like I, I wish me in the future could have told myself no.

You could, you could easily go and get it, R-dive. I'm just riding it out. I'm riding the wave. I like how we got like the DMZ thing going here.

You're separating North and South Korea. Exactly. Are you purposefully creating a crack? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. In your...

I mean, it's like... It's like... Middle part. It's getting too long. So, like... But you just like... It doesn't mean you have to split it

right down the middle and like... You haven't heard the stats, dude. What? 80% of middle parters go bald. No way. Yeah.

80%. Is that actually like a real-life staff? Yeah. 80%. I parted the sea and it never came back, brother. And I never did. 80%, brother.

Look, I just, mine goes gray, though. Yeah, well, you're part of the 20. You lucked out. I know. Dude, I knew I looked like a weirdo with a middle part. How did you get in the 20? That's crazy. I know.

Anyways, Jackson, don't middle part. I think you should switch it tomorrow. Tomorrow, I will literally have a brand new hair. Really? Yeah. All I have to do is sit in the shower and then, like, mess it up and I'm fine. You sit in the shower? All right.

Next second. That's better in the shower school That's by Cody We'll send it to the next segment Yeah, you don't tell me Sorry, sorry, sorry time guests Trying to send it to the next segment I was nervous

I am learning a lot Cody works out in the shower You seem to sit down in the shower That is crazy Ty doesn't take them Ty doesn't take showers That's because big soaps got you guys Topic for another day

Shall we just jump right to it? Yeah All right, we have the OG Fortnite map right here I want you to defend where you're dropping And why? Jackson, I got to say, I've never played Fortnite.

But if I had to drop into this place, I am going to the greasy grove. They probably have some good food down there. Yeah, a lot of funnel cakes and corn dogs. Yeah, I'm going to greasy grove. Drop me there. What's my purpose for dropping here? Am I trying to go, what is it called when you win? Victory Royale.

Is that my goal? Or am I, like, just trying to survive in real life? So you can, there's two different ways. You can like bush camp the entire time in Fortnite and walk your way to Victory Royale and have one kill, sure. Yeah. But you can have an electric win,

which I think fits you better. If I'm going to electric win, then I feel like I'm not going to the Moisty Meyer because that's got to be the worst place to go. I'm going to the tilted towers. Tilted towers. The tilted tower of Pisa. And I don't know.

why I'm going there, but that's... Just feels right? It feels like you want electricity, let's go. I also could drop in at Retail Road, do some shopping before I... I see, that's where I thought you'd go. You're a big shopper. And I know why you went tilted. Why?

Tilted Towers, Tyler, Tony, Titi. It just attracts you. It may have been subliminal. There's only one right answer here. And I think, actually, I know it's Tomato Town. And here's why. Yeah, I dropped Tomato because you got a short drive to Dusty Depot, even shorter drive to lonely.

If you want the scenic route, you'll go up to Whaling Woods. If you want to drop it down south and get into action, retail road. Everything you need in about a mile square, right there, boom, tomato town. And I don't even like tomatoes. Do like ketchup, though.

Whoa! That is sick. Where are we going? I personally, I like greasy grove and tilted towers. That's my person. Oh, that was us. Why? Okay.

Why, though? Okay, so for Tilted That's where the action is Where the action is Back in the day when they first released Tilted Dude, it looked like you were going to a mall Like everyone was that tilted And that's a good thing

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because... Well, if you want the action If you're the winner of Tilted, like, you're him You're going to be loaded to the Gills You're also going to pay H-O-A fees out your rear at Tilted Towers because so many people are there Don't even start me on the traffic Yeah

Plus... H-O-A? Wait, you have to... homeowners association at Tilted Towers? If there was, the fees there were, that's Highland Park, brother. You're paying premium dollar to live in that area. Where would you say Whitesboro is on this map? Moisty moister.

Oh, I can tell you. Yeah. Yeah. Fatal Fields. Also, in between greasy and tilted, good luck navigating through the bushy. Oh, that's the big valley. Shifty shafts. And that's where you're going to encounter a lot of campers.

RVed up, your Joneses of the world, chilling in between tilted and greasy. It's actually a great point. Thank you. Well, that's why I don't leave tilted. I make them come to me. The way Sparky broke down Tomato Town was unreal. That was... All he did was look at the towns next to him and say it was a short drive there.

Because it is, though. But I could do the same thing. I'm saying like... I love Salty Springs, dude, because guess what? Man, you go southwest and you're in the shifty shafts. You go do south, you're in the fatal fields. You go northeast, you got retail row. Due north, just half a mile away.

Dusty Depot. You haven't even talked about Northwest. Tilted Towers Tilted towers Ness short walk And if you want to get Moisty You walk to the south Yeah

East I don't like that word Moisty Yeah Moist is one of the worst words I just You didn't impress me with all your fast talking Name and towns Look at a map

Boys let's keep the gamification going If you remember a couple weeks ago Intern Jack quizzed us with some Gen Z language Yeah We're going to run that back a little bit But today we're going head to head on a quiz on Fun World Facts,

and we're going to see which generation brain supreme. You ready, C-section? Yeah. Let's go. C-section. Do you know what that is? Yeah, that's good. My mom has C-section.

With you? Yeah. I did you. I was a C-section kid. Apparently, my head was so big. They couldn't fit the thing on my head. Wild enough, we're in very similar. Sturps.

Eight doctor, seven nurses for me, pulled me out by the head. that's where a lot of things went wrong. Anyhow, let's play some games. Boys, first question, how fast is the earth traveling around the sun? Looking for MPHs. Or is that a trick question?

Dude, I have no idea. Does the sun revolve around the earth? Does it, Jacks? No, we revolve around the earth. I mean, we revolve around the sun. Well, are you sure? And then the sun probably revolves around something else, but...

There would be a way to figure this out, but I'm just going to take a guess, and I'm going to say, you're asking, you're asking how quick we are rotating or how fast we are moving around the sun like this? Good clarification. How fast? We are moving like this around the sun. Correct.

And we go around the sun once a year? No. Once a year? Bro, be for real. That's why we have New Year. That's insane. Is that? That's what I mean.

New Year. Hey, first of all, can you please just type that in and say, do we have New Year's because we only travel around the sun once? If you get this right, dude, I'm never saying another word to you ever again. I feel like that was not crazy to say, but. You don't think? No. Because we travel around that, and we have a new year.

We base our calendar off the sun rotation. Yes, the Earth's complete one time around the sun is what defines a year. Yeah. Bro, I got it. That's a standing ovation for me. That's well done, Jackson. Hold on. Hold on.

I wanted to see that. I did say once a year, but I didn't think that's why we called. We celebrated New Year. I had no idea. We base it off the calendar. To be fair, though. Don't we also base moon phases off the calendar? Our calendar's messed up, but that's topic for another day.

868 miles per hour. That's your guess? I don't have the correct answer on me, but I think it's significantly faster. Yeah, that's just so much faster. Significantly, I was going to say like... But significantly faster, we'd blow, we'd go through that. I'm going to say 6,700 miles an hour. 6,000.

See, I'm thinking more of that. Oh, man. God, Jax. He just saw it. No, yeah, I saw it. That's right. What was right? It's 67,000.

Does everybody have their answers in? Well, it's too late. No. It's surprised. Yes, the correct answer is, I didn't know what to say. 67,000 or 67,700? I'm going to be honest.

I'm going to be honest. I kind of thought we went around the sun and that was a day. No, that's the spin of the earth. Because we're spinning while we're moving. I'm trying to have a moment of honesty here. I respect that. Takes a man to do that. No, I knew that.

I just didn't. And I thought we went around the sun once, but I didn't know that's why we celebrated New Year. That was a great pool by you. But I know it's all. Yeah. That's not why we celebrate. It sounds like it.

That's what AI's saying, dude. Celebrating New Year's Day. Yeah. That is why. It's a new year. So when you wake up on January 1 this next year, you better not be talking about college football games. You're saying, we made it around the sun again, baby,

and there's a reason to celebrate. Okay. All right. Next question, Sparks. God, I can't believe I'm not as smart as Jackson. This is not a good look by me. It just sounded so dumb when he said it. I know, but.

We're set up to fail here, boys, like we really are. Go ahead. Next question. How deep is the deepest part of the ocean? Let's go miles here. Yeah, the Mariana Trench is the deepest part of the ocean. We're going to go feet. Whoa.

We're going to go feet. I'm going to go, uh, I'm going to go 9,000. Yeah, I think it's over a mile. Oh, I think we're talking 15. He literally just said it's in miles. It's definitely over a mile. No, we're doing in feet now. Oh, you said feet? He changed. Okay.

I don't know how many feet are in a mile. But I'm gonna go I'm gonna go 15k. Okay, so 15k. You're price is right in this. About three miles. Yeah, a little short of three miles. We're-two hundred eighty. We're-we're prices right in this.

Yeah, based on my answer. See, if I would have never given you that an answer, what would you have said? 15K. I'm gonna say, give me in between Gare and Jacks, but gosh, then he's gonna be right. Do I just take one for the team? And go 15-0-0-0-1.

Let me do that. $15001. Price is ready, maybe. Yeah, because I'm going to go even further than that. So you go 15-001 Spark. No, that's for Spark. Give me, I want to say it's just over two miles, so put me at like 12,000 feet.

Change mine to 30,000 feet. We haven't explored the bottom of most oceans. Well, yeah, because it's really dark when you get 500 feet down in the ocean. You know how much pressure that is? So much pressure. Like, how do they know? That's actually a really good point.

How deep is it? All right. Deepest part of the ocean, 36,000, 37 feet. Sparky is the closest. And what is that? In miles? Called. Oh, it's the Mariana Trench, I believe.

Good pool. That's a great pull out of you. Bro. Around seven miles. Do you guys think that's where the dinosaurs live right now? No. That's where the Titanic. So, sub question.

Jackson, how many feet are in a mile? He just, he just told them. Oh, you did. Oh, I didn't hear you all. I genuinely did not hear you. How many feet? Um, a thousand? I want to make fun of you, but I, you know, didn't know that it was a year around the sun.

You get that the earth revolves around the sun and one, you know, one time a year, but you don't know the, how many feet? Is it, let me think about it. A little bit higher than a thousand. 1,200. If I said, I think it's somewhere around two miles. And my guess. Oh, and I said 15,000. And then you said that was three.

So that's, what's 15,000 divided by three? That's like, hang on. I'm almost there. Hang on. How am I sitting on a couch? I don't know. I don't know. 4,000?

Oh. The math made no sense how you got there, but... Is it 4,000? No, it's 5,280, but the fact you just divided 15 by 3... 10,000 divided by 3? It's a ballpark. It's 50. You don't need to ballpark.

You just say the right answer. Jackson, Jackson, how many fives does it take to get the 15? Three. Oh, it is. It's 5,000. Okay. There we go. All right. Well, we're there.

We're there. We're there. Wow. Short for cat's right now. I cannot believe we're tied. Here we go. Oh my gosh. Hey, let's go.

Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Playing with her food right now. Barry him. Question number three, a two-parter. Yep. How long is the Great Wall of China and what country is the Great Wall of China in?

Well, you can see it from space. China. Are you sure about that? Yeah. No doubt. Oh, I knew the, I know the answer to this too. It's an absurd. Like, it doesn't even, you hear the number and you're like, how did people build that?

1,200 miles. Okay, good guess, Gary. But then I'm like, what if I say a number that's more than the miles around the whole earth? God, I feel like an idiot. I've heard the answer to this before. Okay. What did you say? 1200 which is a lot

give me I'm gonna hate this give me Iguadala give me 10,000 10,000 miles so that's too much I think I think

that's a little too much I believe all right Jack where are we going that's too much I like I'm gonna go I'll go 1201

I'm gonna go 1201 give me 1201 what do we got I don't like this what's the answer I'll meet in the middle Give me like 4,520. Do you not have the answer right in front of you?

Oh. I'm in this game as much as y'all are. Answer is 13,171. Oh, I knew it. 13,000? 13,000 miles. That's next. And they built that a long time ago.

I've actually heard myths that the Great Wall China is not real, but... You can see it from space? Can you? Yeah. AI generation's getting crazy. Mariana trench and then that, I mean, you're on a hot street. right now. Coast to coast in the US, what is it? Hey, congrats on the China. 3,000, about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was good. That was good for me. Put that into reference.

I'm trying to, like, yeah, that's what I'm saying, from New York to the Pacific Northwest, back and back. No. That's crazy. How many dimples are on a golf ball? I know this. This one just feels like useless information. I have zero clue. Oh, I couldn't even begin to. Jackson, you go first. Trying to just envision. It's more than you think. The ball. Would you call the golf ball a sphere? Yeah. You would. Well, it depends because it's like a sphere is like a circle, but like if you go If you bro, you if you go into like the depths of things like if you really look at it It's not gonna be a sphere

Because the it dips down and it's essentially not a circle well if you get down to the nitty-gritty part of things If you want to get to the nitty-gritty no sphere is a sphere Sure. All right, we'll sphere it then Okay, thank goodness I'm glad we can all settle on the fact that a golf ball can be considered a sphere I'm gonna go I'm gonna go

safe bet 60 I like 60 60 is a safe bet okay What? Bro, dude there's like I'm gonna go right back I'm gonna go right back to it and say like

I'm gonna say a thousand That's good guess I was gonna I actually don't know I made that up when I said it I was just trying to sound confident, so Jackson got scared. Give me $1,0.8.8. $8.59 for me.

Okay. Real answer is most commonly 336. Jackson. But it's usually between $3,500 and $500. $300? So that's me? 336. No, it's me.

So appreciate that one, boys. Again, that one's useless, though. Yeah. I said 12. I said 1,000. Yeah, that's me. I'll take that one. What is the only food that never spoils?

This feels like riddley. Honey. Process food. Eggs. What is the only food that never spoils? Jackson, Jackson. Hold on. Bro, I've had eggs in my apartment for a year that I haven't used.

Oh, rather. Eggs go rotten. You've ever heard of like rotten eggs? I can't believe I'm sitting on a couch. Jackson said eggs. And my intelligence is being compared to you. All right, let me think about it. You already said eggs, and then you said you had it for a year.

Have you ever eaten that tonight? Please eat the year-long egg. Film it, please. I would love to just... Dude, like 27 minutes after making scrambled eggs. I used to say Cody Jones was the dumbest person I've ever met. I think I now need to take that title away from him. Do you have an answer, Gare?

The food that doesn't spoil. I was going to say bread, but... I don't know. I don't have spicy. No. Yeah, bread, no. You get mold on that. Give me...

I mean, honey's already borderline. line. It's not a food. Give me Campbell's cream of mushroom. That's actually really good to guess. Because I definitely cracked open a can of Campbell's that was about three years past its expiration date and it was just fine.

Man, the food that, yeah, I have no idea. Ballpark Franks. They plump when you cook them, but when you don't cook them, they don't eat. Toteino's pizza. It's going to be a vet. It has to be like, it can't be something fresh. It has to be like a leaf or something. leaf is what I was trying to think of.

No. Leafs go bad. Every leaf goes bad. Yeah, you're right. We are in autumn. They fall from the tree. What my mind goes to is like what do they put in those like nuclear? The answer is honey, guys.

You can just pick something and we can move on. Yeah. What is it? I don't know. Tyler's got it, honey. Honey, wow. You've heard that before. Dude, what a before is.

Or you pulled that out of your rear. Is second on the list cream of mushroom soup by Campbell's? I would think it's hot sauce, probably. Yeah. All right. Jackson. Eggs do. I would throw away those your

old legs. Can't believe you still have those in your fridge. That's disgusting. Next up. What day of the year is the most popular for relationship breakups? Are they asking? Like Tuesday is what I'd say.

Both of mine. My last two have been Tuesdays. The last two of mine have been Tuesdays. Breakup Tuesday. I think mine have been Tuesdays too. Wow. Watch out, folks. I think mine has been a Tuesday too.

I'm going to venture to guess. They're looking for a day. I'm going to go ahead and say Valentine's Day. Yeah, which is sick. February 14th. That shows you how sick of a world we live in and that's the most break-upable day. But I actually completely agree. I also want to double down on 214 V-Day.

Give me... You're just going to pull like a September 21st? What day did people go back to school? Generally Monday. It just depends. If you're on the West Coast, it's after Labor Day. Yeah. Give me September 4th.

Okay. Except 4? What about you? Jack? No, it's you. I want you to go. He'd 2.14. It could be...

I'm thinking, like, when do, like... St. Patrick? People, like, get together during, like, the December. time. Christmas? Yeah. So like I'm saying no way. Put me down for not Christmas. 1225. So it's, I'm not saying Christmas. I'm saying whenever it wraps around. The sun is New Year's Day. Oh yeah. Okay. I'm saying like bro

some relationships aren't lasting like more than like six months. I'm like what's six months after December? That would be like June. Yeah. Give me like, the logic. The thought process. How many to get here to this answer? He's going to watch. It's going to be that. Give me June first.

How many months? Wait, wait, wait. How many months are in a year? 12. Okay. I have a new, I think whenever school starts. Give me whatever school starts. Say August 15th.

Actually, no, no, no. Give me a month after school starts. Okay. October 1. Hey, there's 365 days you can pick, brother. Give me October 1st All right Lock it in

What is it Jackson you were on to something It was December 11th Whoa Which was a Tuesday Look it up It has been a Tuesday It has been

I know it has How do you classify And again If December 11th Is a Tuesday this year Are they just asking people When was your last breakup And those are the people they asked

It's like Think about whenever Steve Harvey Does his polls I mean I will say No one got correct there but I do feel like Jackson lost that one, by the way, that you came to October 1st. Technically, he was the closest.

I was the closest. Yeah, that's me. That's one of those ones. The teacher, the teacher can't even leave notes because she doesn't even know how he got to that answer. It's just like, yeah, I guess so. Man, it's close, though. Next up, this one feels like a personal attack.

All right, boys, how many hairs are on the average human head? I'm going to stoop to Jackson's level here. Give me $6.7 million. Six, seven. Oh, that many. Okay. Yeah, I think it's like two-milly, is what I'm going to say. Yeah.

It's a crazy amount of hair. Oh, we're just talking to head. It took me years to lose my hair, dude. You're going to count? Oh, I thought you were counting. I'll work out beards, too. Part of your head. Brother, I clogged up multiple drains in the shower when my hair was falling out.

And you haven't gained any. Let that sink in. Gained LB so. Yeah, but not hair follicles. Give me 6.1 million. 6.1. I think y'all are, I think, you're shooting for the sun here. I think it's a lot less than what y'all think.

Are you just keep trying to tie everything back to your first answer? I'm saying, I think it's like... 500,000. If that. I'll go, I'll play it safe and go 500,000, but I think it could be lessened that. Answer is, 100,000 for Jackson. Okay.

Wow. Hey, what are you? If I was just taking a test on my own. We need a multiple choice. I feel like Jackson, if you gave them without any answers, he misses all of them. Oh, I don't. He really prices right. You had been a great price.

We should have made him answer first. First on every single level. But hey, you are smarter than you look. I will say that. How many countries can you name now? Or you know what? How many continents are there? 13.

Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. And you know what? That is all we need. And we'll leave you with that. Thanks for watching all those athletes. We'll see it. It's like six. It's like six.

Is it six? Okay. We're going, we're going, we're going Europe. Okay. Asia. Okay. South America, North America, Antarctica, and the other one. The other one.

Right? Or Australia. Wait, that's a continent? Okay, I was really scared about that one. That's really good, dude. That name will? No. He's going to be impressed.

Whoa! You know what that means? I do. It's time for our two-minute warning. Sparks, you want to head with the rant? Yeah, I've got a rant today. Is it about Jen Ziers? No, but it's something that Jackson could take to heart.

I'm sick and tired of the transfer portal. It's ruined college athletics for the most part. Wow. Mm-hmm. These, you know, once upon a time, it was about getting your education, that kind of thing. I think we've lost our touch a little bit. A student came before athlete once upon a time. And now they're athlete students.

And we're flip-flopping schools. We're not worried about degrees. and that's how you get 13 comments and look where we've ended up as a nation so my rant is we've got to do something to the portal that one benefits the kid

while also benefiting the institution there's a world where we can meet in the middle have a middle ground where a kid doesn't attend five schools over four years money ruins everything dude meet in the middle that old Georgia pine Mm-hmm.

Jack, you got anything to add to the rant? Well, I mean, like, the kids are going to have CTE anyway. So, like, how much does it agree mean? All right, Jacks, well, man, we enjoyed having you. See you never again. But I enjoyed it, man. That was great. But I gave you, like, anything else you want to say?

No, good. I'm scared. Oh, boy. All right. Well, hey, our time is up here. I sure hope they do come back for next week. I'm not sure kids out there listening. There is not 13 continents.

We'll be back Wednesday. Brand new episode. Follow the show on all social media at Almost Athletes. Like and subscribe to us on YouTube. Listen. And give us five stars. Stock up on honey. And leave us a voicemail at.

At 972-805-88-66. I'm going to go work on it. Yeah. Almost athletes with Dude Perfect Dism. a wave original. Thanks for tuning in. Pound it, noggin. See ya! See ya!