Almost Athletes with Dude Perfect - Dude Perfect: We Try Cereal With Weird Liquids, TASTE TEST

Episode Date: January 28, 2026

No milk? No problem! In response to a recent debate, the Dudes try a variety of cereals with anything but milk—taste testing combinations with ranch, apple juice, Tang, chocolate milk, and more to see what actually works (and what should never be tried again). But first, the Dudes break down the NFL’s coaching carousel, the Divisional Round, key coaching decisions, and give their Super Bowl and MVP predictions. The conversation jumps from quarterback value to NBA chatter, then into some of the wildest Almost Sports yet: extreme ironing and a mind-blowing 100-meter hot dog challenge. The episode wraps with the Dudes ranking fan-submitted Almost Athlete sports fails and a loaded voicemail segment covering everything from voice cracks to the origins of the Dude Perfect panda, followed by a classic two-minute warning to close it out. 00:00 Introduction 01:15 Cody Jones Introduction  05:00 Patriots vs Broncos Breakdown  06:05 Rams vs Seahawks Breakdown  17:00 Super Bowl Predictions  19:05 NBA / NCAA Basketball  24:20 Car Jiu Jitsu 25:30 Almost Sports: 100m Hot Dog Race  27:45 Almost Sports: Extreme Ironing  34:16 Cereal Milk Roulette  54:05 Cory Cotton Introduction  58:20 Dude Perfect Announcements  01:04:40 Almost Athlete #1 01:06:20 Almost Athlete #2 01:07:45 Almost Athlete #3 01:09:35 Almost Athlete #4 01:12:35 Almost Athlete #5 01:20:25 Voicemail #1: Voice Cracks?  01:22:35 Voicemail #2: What The Biggest Animal You Could 1v1? 01:27:45 Voicemail #3: Cory, Why Did You Choose Pink?  01:29:00 Two Minute Warning  What to do now: 1. Smash that LIKE button  2. Hit SUBSCRIBE so you never miss a DP podcast moment  3. Drop a comment with who YOU want to see on Almost Athletes next! Subscribe for more!    https://www.youtube.com/@almostathletes    • • • • Almost Athletes with Dude Perfect is (almost) a sports podcast. Tune in weekly to hear the dudes’ hottest sports takes, great debates, interviews with your favorite athletes and entertainers, and hilarious BTS from all things Dude Perfect.  New episodes drop every Wednesday.  Follow along on all platforms.   Listen to the pod on your morning commute or wherever it finds you: Apple: - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/almost-athletes-with-dude-perfect/id1834502483 Spotify: - https://open.spotify.com/show/55gaQm31JIbp6td7QtYsPU?si=6423db3118ac497f Follow Almost Athletes to keep up with the Dudes!: https://www.instagram.com/almostathletes https://www.tiktok.com/@almostathletes https://x.com/almostathletes_ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Okay, give me ranch and corn flakes. I'm not doing that. Give me ranch and corn flakes. There was a pretty solid chance I throw up on set, but... I'm going to throw up if you throw up. Dude, the people, we're doing it for the people. They need to know. But the listeners aren't even seeing this, man.

They're just listening. Oh, the listeners should go watch this one. Okay, this is one you should watch. This isn't even going to pour. It doesn't even have, like, consistent. Oh, God. Oh, no. That's good.

That's good. That's good. I won't partake in this one. dude just one little bite you just can't think cereal you got to think casserole that's just think just think oh it's like a oh yeah but not all ranch is made equal either it's like uh like um it's like uh oh god dude no bro i'm not touching it looks like gravy welcome to almost athletes with dude perfect a wave original follow the show on all socials at almost athletes like and subscribe on youtube or listen and subscribe

wherever you get your podcast. We're your host. I'm Spark. That's Gare. Cody Jones. Back in the batters box. How you doing, Coe?

Dual salute. Doing great. Hanging in there is a proper word to put it. We are fresh off. Icemogyn. Yeah. Ice apocalypse. Not as bad as like the Circa.

What year was that? 21. 21 was bad, but the one late college for me was the really bad one. It was like a week long. They're all going together at this point. Honestly, ice storms are turning into like birthdays. Agreed.

The more you get the less you get up about it. And our, our 2021 was now Nashville's 2026. That looks bad over there. Oh, really? I haven't seen any. It's bad. Nashville got it the worst? Yeah, like their trees are falling on all the power lines. Nobody has power.

I mean, you don't have power. You can't play country music. And that's what Nashville's known for. You can still play it. You can. No one hears it. If no one hears the country music played out in Nashville, does it actually played? That's good.

Some would say. Yeah, I ran to work today. from a little red in the face. Oh, what a goose. Yeah, I was wondering what that was. I didn't want to bring up any, like, skin issues. No, dude, I just was like, I'm not driving on these icy roads. You were rocked.

I ran. Why, you break a leg? Well, you know, sometimes it just takes effort to get here. It's hot, though, in here. Can we get some AC? Can we get some ice in here? Because it is freezing outside. It is.

The people don't understand, if you're not from the Metro, the DFW, the greater DFW area, just how bad ice does us. I mean, it shuts down. We don't have the machinery. Explain to the people what you mean. Well, I would say this. People like the thing that Texans can't drive on ice and snow, and it's less about that and more that we don't have the sand trucks and the plows.

To where you grab someone from New York and put them on our roads, they're sliding all over those tollway bridges. At what point do we do that? Because I've heard that my whole life like, we don't have the sand trucks. I don't know. The tollway has it. The tollway looked like there was nothing ever happened.

You could rip down the tollway. I went zero to 70 pretty quick. But you pay for it. But those service roads? When we were coming in, I saw Corey, man, got completely sideways. Hit a curb. ripped a curb,

act like nothing happened. That guy's incredible. The gift that keeps on giving. Yes. Any fun ice stories, though? Did y'all do that? See, the part part of it is this like that icy mixture? It's hard to sled in.

Dude, we couldn't even make a snowman with our ice. No. No, see? Because it's like sonic ice. Kids were bummed. Couldn't make ice cream with your, with the snow. Any of that. Flu hit my,

hit my clan. It's like your fifth wave of flu. Five of the six went down. I have yet to have it. That's leadership. That's community right there, leadership. Or I have it right now.

Leadership. Oh, no, I already had it. Okay. I had flu A, B, C, D, E. It's good. Actually, I'm thankful that I got it when I did, because I think I slept 20 hours from Friday to Saturday. My body needed a full reset, like your PlayStation.

Oh, you missed the whole ice storm. Oh, yeah. That's incredible. You've been on the sticks during the weekend? What we went up to? Definitely. I was sticking it up. What do you do for food?

Oh, I preloaded, but I went through my snack inventory so quick. Like, giving your top two snacks. Like I went to CVS, got some gummy worms, some chips. That kind of thing. You went to CVS for Ice Mageddon. Well, no, no, I was already loaded up, but I'm like, hey, let's go grab, you know, some final things. Some flaming hot.

It's really fun. Yes. No, seriously, Flaming Hot with the Dill Pickle, pretty good. I'm loaded up my snacks. I'm a ruffles athlete. So I don't look too fondly on those. We got some ruffle stuff happening. I went through my snack inventory, though, by Saturday.

So, uh-huh. Um, coming up, we're going to talk AFC, NFC championship games and give our Super Bowl predictions. We're going to judge some amazing almost athlete sports fails. that you all sent in. We're going to try some cereals with milk alternatives. We're going to check in on the NBA season. But first, let's talk some Super Bowl. I had to watch football snackless on Sunday. And boy, was it some fun games to watch. Yeah, man. Wild games.

Wild games started in Mile High, the 10-7 thriller. Were you all cool with that? I don't mind it. Once. It felt like 1960s football broke out. Once a year, if that's how it goes, I'm fine. If it's every game, I'm going to stop watching the NFL. And it's a beautiful when it's a winner-win. Yeah, it reminded me of the A&M Miami game. Just weather conditions made that game the way it should have been. I mean, the way it was. Right.

It could have been way high scoring. Oh, sure. You played that game three months earlier. Stid them looked apart there at first. Yeah, and I knew that. Sean Payton's such a good quarterback. He's great. Whisper that I knew he'd come up with some kind of game plan.

There was one play, though, that left me scratching my head. Because I said out loud, yes. Because it was like fourth and a healthy one. It was wanting some change. At that point in the game, you don't know that it's about to blow. Lizard, maybe you do. But I love the thought of taking your points there going up 10-Rip. Yeah, you got to take the field goal.

I wanted them to. Now, granted, there's no guarantee that snaphole kit goes through, but, man. I thought the coaches actually were the culprit for both the losses. Really? You're putting it on Brable. Well, he won. Well, sorry, you're putting on a shot on. It would be hard to put the loss on variable.

Because the decision, that was a bad decision. Yeah. And then the decision in the, uh, Seahawks came at the end of the, at the end of the first half, the play calling is like you gave them way, like, and then you go down and you let them score a TD, like that just can't happen. And then I thought, there's four and a half minutes on the clock at the end of the game. I think you take the points. Oh, you do. Field goal kickers these days can kick it from the 50, dude. You're saying down inside the five when they went forward on fourth and gold. I do. All you got to do is hold them to not get a field goal. Let your defense have three minutes to

work the clock. You have a minute to get in the field goal range to win the game. Everyone can argue and be like, well, that was to win the game. And I was like, yeah, but I felt, the two plays before that felt rushed. Stafford was just kind of like, they were getting to them. It's so hard to score down there, too. It's amazing how they just drive the ball inside the tin. You run out of room.

What a football game that was. I wanted to break. I felt like that was the best two teams in the NFC going at it, though. Agreed. I felt that way. Do you agree with this, that if the Rams beat the Seahawks, I think they smoke the Patriots. I just feel like the ceiling for the Rams.

Stafford, just their veterans, I think they go in there and they beat the brakes off the Patriots. Okay, with that said, do you think the Seahawks do the same? No. To me, this is the revenge. I don't. I don't. This is revenge. It is revenge for not handing it off to Marshawn House and Butler.

You don't know. That's going to happen. Very much like the Mavs. I felt like when they won it in 11, the fact they had to go through the heat was poetic in the same sense. I feel like the Hawks got to go through. Oh, I think the Hawks will win. I just think it's a closer game than the Rams playing the Patriots.

I don't know, Drake May. I saw the opening for it. I believe they opened his three and a half point favorites. It's jumped to five already. Yeah. Yeah. It's going to be a pat. Seahawks favored by five is what I'm seeing.

We double-checked that, Jared. You are? Who's favored in the Super Bowl? Do you see Seattle is favored four and a half? Seattle four and a half. Yeah, that's about what I thought it would be. Should we do a friendly wager? 5K.

Well, I mean, let's leave the, let's leave the, let's take out the monetary value for the peeps. But I might not be on the first. follow-up episode of Super Bowl. Well, you know. But my Venmo will be open. Oh, there's a perfect thing. Okay, how about this? The Patriot Twin, you can take this chair for a couple weeks. And I'm out.

You dirty dog. He's setting something up. Yeah. That feels like a family vacation. He's going to Disney World again. Exclusive golf course. We're going to Disney World with the Seahawks. That's right. Yeah, Super Bowl Sunday set, man. Should be fun. Are you still into the commercials? No. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I like.

to tune in? I feel like they have gotten progressively worse. Maybe I'm just getting older. No, they're worse. Are they? Yeah. Man, they used to have some fire Dorito commercials back in which is kind of weird because I feel like TV in general has gone more progressive. Like, I mean, shows now allow kind of anything on network TV, but like the commercials are censored. I think it has more to do with back in like the 90s and 2000s. You couldn't see anything other than on your TV. And now you have YouTube. So you're seeing funny content all day, every day. And so now it's watered down. So by time you see a commercial, it's just not going to be near as good as. the lady falling off a table. Fair. Scarlett takes a tumble. That's exactly like BP.

Do you remember puppy monkey baby? That one just popped in my head. That was a crazy commercial. What? Puppie monkey baby? It's sick, dude. Go look it up. Anyhow, Seattle. Sam Darnold, really? Sammy D. Man. To be fair, Sammy D had a really good year in Minnesota last year and they let them walk and they look foolish now. Okay. Another thing we can talk about because I think it just needs to happen. I think quarterbacks need to take less money to win games. Oh. For everyone watching Sam Darnel is, would you say he's a top eight quarterback? I'm, I'm dead. He's French top eight, sure. I mean, he's somewhere around there.

Other than, like, Patrick Mahomes, I can't name another one, maybe Stafford, you should not be getting over. You should not pay your quarterback over $50 million. He needs to be generationally good, you're saying, to eat up that much cap. It's also like, like Josh Allen, okay, he has kind of no talent around him. Careful. Well, he doesn't. I know, James Cook might be a watcher.

Yeah, fair. That's a good point, Cody. Okay, when I say he doesn't have a lot of talent, I'm taking like, there's five guys on that team, you know? Like, you need 10. There's 11 on each side of the ball. Do you think anybody ever says that about Ty? Like, your tie just doesn't have any talent. For sure. Dude, imagine if we were all. Imagine if we were all ties, dude. That's what Josh Allen's saying right now.

Yeah. But I'm saying, do you take a pay cut to go get you a Miles Garrett to go get you a something and win a Super Bowl? Yeah, because I don't need any more money. Sure. Yeah. Here's your top highest paid cues right here. Yots aren't cheap, dude. Jack Burrow, Allen, Love, Lawrence, Tua on that list is a tough look.

That's a bad one. J. Gough, Erdy, Herb, Lamar. So let's see. So yes, MEDs not even on that list. So who's playing in the Super Bowl on that list? Your point is being proven right now. Wow, dude. That's crazy.

No one. I feel like GM should look at this and be like, there are a bunch of Sam Darnels in the league. You don't mean that in a bad way. No, I'm saying like he's a good player. He signed a three-year deal. That's not a lot of money. Is the value of the quarterback actually going down in general?

That's what I'm saying this hurts the value of the quarterback. Because I mean, they, you know, duct tape and glued a game plan together for Stidham and lost by three. That was kind of nuts, right? We saw Nick Bowles win a Super Bowl in our lifetime. You're right. Maybe the value of the quarterbacks, maybe it's not as crazy as we thought. Careful. Sales jerseys gives hope.

It does. It does sell jerseys. The face is a franchise. Dakota Prescott. Speaking of kind of money, I saw this. Would y'all take a pay cut? Oh, to sign better talent so I can get out of this? Like me, J.B. Graham?

Sure. I don't get paid for being on here. Speaking of money, I think I saw this. I think I saw this from like front office sports or something. Do you know how much money Cooper Flags you're going to make by the time he's 30? More than me. And player contracts. And player contracts.

Because you're projecting what it will be like Supermax going up and stuff. And this is not with New Balance either. No, this is played in. player contract. Kids are going to have generational money. What, a billy? A billion. A billion dollars. By the time he's 30. I hope. He has 10 years. He might

have, he might make two billion dollars in the NBA. He's not worried about his light bill. Like me. Is that not insane? That's when the economics of that don't make sense to me. Because he can sign two supermaxes by the time he's 30. How does the NBA have enough? Is it just because there's not as many players? I don't. I don't

know. I thought it was somewhere around a billion dollars. And I was just like, that is the craziest thing I've ever. He's worse more than Mark Cuban. That's nuts. When he bought the Mavs. Yeah, like $400. Nearly $1 million. All right, I got a bone to pick.

Shador Sanders making the Pro Bowl. Yeah, I talked about this before he came on. 10 touchdowns or something. 10 picks. You're well on your way, dude. Yeah, the Pro Bowl is really getting water down. You're well on your way. I'm not kidding.

How close was Philip Rivers? Very close. None enough games played. Not enough, but close. How many Shador play? Seven? He's going to make one heck of a coaching, a coach one day. I like Shador too, but I'm with Jones.

This has gotten watered down. What do you mean? It's a pro-ball. I get it. I know, but it's still an honor to be in the pro bowl. Not anymore. Well, I know it's not to play it. Use it to like hold legacy arguments.

Like, hey, he was a six-time pro-bowler. When we're allowing a seven to ten touchdown to interception ratio. Ugly. And again, I like Shador. All the tweets about just how could the Browns fire Stephansky when he coached up a pro bowler. That's fair. That's our point.

What were some other NFL news? Steelers hire our former friend, Mike McCarthy. I mean, dude, if I'm a Steelers fan, that is just like such a blah-hired to me. Yeah, is that a pro Aaron Rogers hire since they were obviously back in Green Bay? Is that a way to get Aaron back in for one more year, you think? I didn't think they liked each other. I guess it's just another year to go nine and eight for the Steelers and keep the winning

streak alive. Wild. I think Mike McCarthy's like the present day Jeff Fisher. You remember him back in the day? He was so good. The worst all time.

Yeah, but he was great at 500. Never really that bad, but never great. Titans hire Robert Sala. Fike. Falcons. I like Falcons. Hiring is a good coach. He's going to land on his feet and run

with that thing. Because the Falcons, we've talked about it. They're not that far away. A couple pieces here, a couple pieces there. I'm worried about the Harbaugh. Yeah, me too. As a cowboy fan, the Giants did really well

with Harball. That one just feels like a fit. It really does. Is Mike Tomlin thinking A&M defensive coordinator? I mean, we just hired. We hired a D.C. We did a step back.

We did hire D.C.? Yeah. That would be a step back. So did the Cowboys. Christian Parker. Yeah, your boy didn't get it. Yeah, Zach Orr was hoping DeSoto, North Texas grad would have been a perfect fit.

Do you like Christian Parker? Yeah, I do. I mean, everything on paper, I do like them. Came from the Eagles. Yeah, coming from the Eagles is you're feeling Russian spy vibes. I am. He's going to come in here and run Tampa 2 and give up theverts. Smart.

You're an Eagles fan. I don't like it, dude. I want to see his season ticket holder stuff. I want to make sure he's not going to the link and watching the Eagles behind our back. I do like it on paper. Young, energetic, I think he's one of those guys really you're going to run through a wall for.

It reminds me of the Chris Richard hired. Dude, the Cowboys have gone through the coaching crowd. I'm saying, at what point do you get a call? I'm just saying. Breaking news. Just in. The bills are promoting their own offensive coordinator, Joe Brady to head coach.

That hurts, man. I'm not getting the gig. I'm not getting it. That's crazy because we had a follow-up interview Thursday. He deserves the head coach. He does. Over me? That's good.

That's crazy. He's a good O.C. And I think it's going to keep Josh Allen happy. That feels like the move right there. I bet they crossed past with 17 and made sure he a okayed that higher, as you should, the face of the franchise. He's 30. And he's like, he's running out of time to get that Super Bowl.

Yeah, he's kind of getting that Dan Marino, So, Jack going. Who, what other quarterbacks are in that same boat? Corse Prescott now in his 30s. He's looking for his first. First playoff one. No, he's got one. No, he's got a, yeah, it's just we can't get out of the first.

You can't get out of the divisional round. You're right, though. Now, it's starting to become, like, working against time. All the time's undefeated, too. Yeah, man, my back this weekend, after that long sleep session of 18 hours, I woke up my lower back. I could not stand up straight. I'm not kidding.

I was like, what? I do. You know, paramedics can't get here. It's icy. Paramedics could get there. Care fight. They could. I flip my bed. Too many notches. I finally flipped it because I sleep. I'm a one-sider. I'm a one-sider and I realized I was, I had an indention. Yeah. The sparky indention. So I flipped it and it eased the back pain a little bit, but I'm not used to sleep in 18. That's crazy. Isn't that wild? Before we get off the football, let's let's go ahead and take a winner, a score, and a Super Bowl MVP. Winner is Seattle Score is

3417 Okay Doubleing him up And I'm gonna go JSN Okay MVP

I'm gonna go Pats 24-21 I'm gonna say May MVP Okay Man You got him on that Brady's trajectory If he does that He's on that Tom timeline

I'm ready to follow it I had the Rams winning it all Really thought they'd get it done there In Seattle They should have Give me the Hawks It's their time

They get redemption for the goal line pick. Give me 27-17. And I'm with you. J-S-N, man. Adam on my team the last three years in fantasy. Rockwall native. You think Gidell's going to let Portnoy get into the game? He's banned from all NFL games.

Easy. Yeah. For what? He snuck into one. They kicked him out. And then he asked, could I please just come to one more? And Gidell hasn't made his decision yet.

I certainly he's got a better chance to me. I think he has a good heart. I think he let him come watching that too. goodness is big. I think he does let the pat. He comes and lets him watch the patch lose. I'm not banned from the NFL, but I feel like Portnoy's got a better chance

than I do at least. Grace amounts. I will say, Roger, can we tell the people, Jared? Oh, that we're going to California. We're going to California. Almost athletes on the road, baby.

On the road. That's going to be fun. Yep, going to the foundry in San Francisco and going to talk to a few people involved with the Super Bowl. Stay tuned. They tuned indeed. My let Sparky shoot up, maybe.

Be so good. flight first. First things first. Make the flight. Check into the flight. Second thing is, if we're just asking for Goodell to give us tickets, if he might be listening, maybe, Roger. Hey, it worked with the MLB in the World Series somehow. Get your boy up, dude. It's true. I'm willing and able. I am willing and able. Well, I can't wait. Super Bowl Sunday, boys, take the over on the anthem. It's over two minutes for sure. Who is it? I don't know. Take the over. And it's tails. I've learned. Boys with football nearing its end, which is sad. It's time to kind of put other sports under the microscope.

ahead. Basketball. It's been fun so far. I don't know how, like... How dialed you've been watching? You've been watching pretty good? I watch my Luca Lakers and my maths. So just simply NBA,

you haven't touched the college game? I will say last night, Arizona stayed perfect. Number one team of the nation, barely beat DeVonza and the YU. Took 24 shots, by the way, DeBanza. Made six. Going to work on the efficiency. NBA-wise, though,

the Thunder, man. Yeah, they look. They're generationally good. That feels like it could go a very long time. They're young. they've got money but you got the Spurs out on their heels

that one as a Mavs fan is tough for me because obviously I am prone to dislike both Oklahoma City and San Antonio but it would be a disservice as a fan not to get that in the playoffs a wimby versus that team I think you're gonna meet in the conference final

and call me crazy a little future prediction they can't beat the Spurs dude Spurs match up well with them they stroke I mean how many times what's the head to head this year I know the NBA Cup they beat them Are they four and over?

No, I think Oklahoma City got one of them, if I'm not mistaken. It's like, it's... Thunder right there, then Spurs, Spurs, Spurs, Spurs. Spurs, Spurs. So, yeah, there's something in the water there. I think when you go seven-game series, I think Spurs can take them. Props in the Eastern Conference, I think if you asked a normal fan who casually watches, who's the one seed in the East. Oh, you've never guessed Pistons.

Never guessed. Never guessed. The Detroit Pistons. That's really cool for basketball, man. I think so. Early 2000s, we remember the... In Wallace. The reincarnation of the Bad Wants. Pistons. That was super fun. Well, now Kate Cunningham, another DFW guy,

leading the charge there in Detroit. 33 and 11. Quite impressive? Yeah, I think that the Celtics get out of the East. So it's one of those things you feel like that the Cavs of last year, where you got the pretty record. I think Tatum's going to come back for the playoffs. Oh, I still think it runs through Boston,

just given the track record they've had and success they've had. But really cool story developing over there in the Eastern Conference. Love it. With Detroit. How long ago was it when Pistons won like two games? like it was oh very recently and I let the people in Detroit know about it Grand Rapids on tour they booed me

yeah I remember Cody's got a battle win before the pieces he toured on my birthday man tough tough Jay he'll be back he'll be back for playoffs no else about to be back Kyrie Irving

oh it'd be a nice pleasant surprise do you need him do you move AD I just got before what pennies on the dollars at this point he's banged up so much that it'd be just we're two games away from the play the 10th the playing. I think the Mavericks get in with good health. It's hard to imagine. Cooper keeps getting better with every outing. You don't want to match up. You don't want to match up in

that Mavs team. I don't want to play ever Luca in the playoffs. I know that. It was emotional just watching player intros again, dude. It's been what a couple years now and it never gets easier. They introed them and the whole doubt. I mean everybody I stick with it. He will be he will be a mav dude. Like one. I think there's a chance. Dude, he treated his fans to the box. I'm with him. He's coming back. He's coming back. He's coming back. He stopped by his own house. Not even a question in my mind. I have like written that off. No, no, he'll be back. Him and Cooper are going to win a ship together. Like his last year when he's 40? I think with Nico out now, there is a pathway. There's a pathway. There's a lot of people who say in, you know, 2012, the thought of LeBron going back to Cleveland had been like, there's no chance, you know? And if that marriage can be re-cated-

that one Cinderella story and now projecting it on my guy. Oh yeah, for your sanity and say, imagine that he's never coming back. I think the contracts are going to line up nice. I think him and Coup. Kyrie is off the books. He has what three more years left at Lakers? He just signed a three-year deal? Yep. So this one and two more? Yep. Once that contract's up, you're saying? Yeah, he's coming back. Maybe this money matches. Don't you dare. Back to the Pistons. Boy, 14 wins. I'll get season tickets. 14 wins in 20, 23, 24 for the Detroit Pistons. We're not even to the All-Star break. They got 33 and the one seed in the east. Really cool story developing.

keep your eye on the NBA. It's about that time. That is the nice part about the NFL schedules. Once that Super Bowl ends, you're kind of at the all-star break for basketball. Yeah. Dial it. Hockey, hockey, close, and pitchers and catchers, baby. Yes, baby. Reporting. That's insane. Yes, baby. Oh, baseball. America's pastime. Divide the record. Telling you, dude, season.

Dive into the world baseball classic this year. Really? Me later. It's so fun. It is. It started in 06. It's a fairly new competition, but it's going to be really cool. I'll take a look. Speaking of baseball, too, we have a, uh, really cool baseball player that's going to stop by almost athletes. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. It happens to play shortstop, 30, 30 seasons. Oh. It's a silver slugger or a platinum glove winner. It's not me, if you're wondering. You're on the sticks a lot. I am. I've done those things, but only on the sticks.

Oh, man. On the show. Is it time to talk about it? Talk about what? Let's do it. Jackson. Ty. Car.

The bullying that took place. Jitsu. Yeah, Ty's got to be careful now that we're a little more corporate because there's an HR. department and when I watch this it screamed HR HR you know what I mean agreed he's got to be careful and then of course shout out to J.B our producer who got the coverage on the car you never know you need the coverage till you need it definitely take the insurance would be my advice full coverage yeah nothing out of pocket you know what if you crack a window they just smile and

take the keys yeah and if you got a small TV best buy we'll just give you one but have come to see tie's face right when it's just laughing he's playing with this food this is a guy who opens his goldfish plays with him a little bit before devouring them. That is... Did Jackson ever stand a chance? No, no, no, no, no. Jackson's still complaining about the broken leg. He thought he snapped his shin in half.

We gotta understand if you're gonna hop in a four-door with Ty and play card jujitsu, you're liable to lose a fever. Oh, he got a bad too. Yeah, he's gotten that on me before when we've wrestled. Round two. He tries to go hex it, bro. That is just... Is that legal?

That looks so illegal. That's an HR nightmare. That is an HR. If you just sent that clip to HR, it's not a good look. And in Ty, this is where it happens. It wasn't even that. Oh, the-oh, was the kick from the inside. Yeah, the inside.

I don't know how he didn't snap his femur. Thank goodness he didn't. Yeah, poor Jackson was a fish swimming up water. Oh, got him in the choke and then he taps. He usually wouldn't tap so fast. I wanted my face blurred on this. To be honest, because it's false tough. That was last week's almost sports.

this week 100 meter hot dog race excuse me there's a trend on Instagram and TikTok where people see how fast they could eat a hot dog and then run

100 meters this feels like torture wait so you're devouring a dog while running the hondo no no I think you gotta eat it a preloaded dog dude watching Joey chestnut I've seen that guy on Instagram

that like can like slurp a whole dog down my algorithm's different so part of your time is how long it takes you to eat the hot dog. So if you can eat the hot dog faster, you don't have to run as fast and vice versa. Interesting. So you think like Usain Bolt would be better than a Joey chestnut? I don't know with this. No, no. Joey beats Usain Bolt. Joey beats you St. Joey's putting his dog down in one second. Yeah. Yeah, but his run is a eight minute 40 time. Sure. That's Tennessee State,

cross-country by the way. Shout out Tennessee State. I want a hot dog now. I'm going to 7-11. That hot dog does look delicious. The fact that you're watching a hundred-meter dog dashing it makes you want to eat a hot dog is concerning. See, I don't like the dip. I don't dip my dog in water. Oh, wait, well, we never talked about it. How's the cholesterol doing? Good.

Been grinding. Eating spinach, carrots, salads. You have been sucking on your spinach pouches. You've been healthy. I've been proud of you. What's not healthy is this 100 meter dog race. 27 seconds feels attainable. If Ty was in here, he would say, dude, I could do this in 9.

He probably could. That means you saying, good. world record by point seven. With a dog. With a dog. This one is two things. I think I could do it in 45 seconds. Yeah.

I would hope you could. I think you could get one hot. It's eating a dog in 30 and then run it a fairly fast. 15 second? I mean, dude, I'm almost 40. Yeah, that'd actually be impressive. 45, it'd be tough for me. I'll try.

I'll give it a go though. I'll give it a go for you guys. Can you eat it while you're running? No, you have to finish it and then go. Which dude's the best at this? Try Cody. I can eat the fast. That's just saying.

You can devour a dog. He makes up seconds eating, but that doesn't matter. I think you entire a photo finish. You get about 10 meter head start, but he, yeah, that's good. That's good if you want to. Let me know. I'll watch.

I'll commentate. Make it short. That's good. Not as good as car jiu-jitsu, the 100-meter dog race. What about extreme ironing? I feel like I would be a... Not my game. Don't know how to iron.

Extreme ironing? A fan voicemail clued us in on the Somal sport. It's called Extreme Ironing. Basically, people bring in an ironing board to extreme locations. top tops and they just iron that's no this is not even an almost sport that's that's crazy

I'm trying too hard just iron in the laundry room where you're supposed to iron yeah I'd rather just wear it wrinkly than iron really yeah I still care I'm a big close steamer ironer if it's wrinkled I just don't wear it

goes in the like giveaway pile I'm gonna be honest with y'all I've never ironed anything yeah me either I don't have but I don't like Is that dangerous to say no okay throw it in the dryer Yeah, that's what I do. I do like a little de wrinkle.

The twins will have some lady come and then take it to get dry cleaned. Yeah. Let's hear the voicemail. Please. Is extreme ironing a sport or an almost athlete moment? I think it's an almost athlete. But you guys took me.

I think there's a third category and it's not even an almost athlete. Yeah, I agree with Cody here. Can I address the voicemails real quick? Go ahead, go ahead. I'm not sure if we're listening to a bunch of voicemails where they're calling in the back of history class.

Oh, I bet they are. That's history. Is there whispering? Yeah. I feel like I was home room. That was home room right after lunch. Be a, you know, forward with your voice. Project.

Project. I have confidence. No, I think you're spot on. I think it's history class. I think you might be part of one act play and they were running through the run through. I don't sleep on one act play kids. There's something there. That's me.

I haven't said the word one act play in 25 years. That's amazing. It's the best. That's awesome. That's an almost sport. Can I get an extreme ironing bid? You're telling me they putting an ironing board on the top of a glacier here? It's a mountain.

This is doing too much. That's... This is doing too much. Yeah, no. I'm not, yeah, they're not even ironing. Oh, they're just bringing an ironing board out. This is... This is fake news.

This is... We got had... Yeah, this is... This has actually been a thing going on for about 10 years, apparently. This is clip farming. And now my algorithm is just going to be people taking an ironing board to weird location... Skydiving with an ironing board is... It's crazy.

See, this is just It's just a new version of planking. Yes. It's not, yeah. It's not sport. I'm out. Yeah,

I'm with you. This is more of a look at me type thing. Yeah. Speaking of extreme though. Yeah, yeah, I was going right where you're going. Speaking of extreme.

Alex. Yeah, dude. Climbing the skyscraper. Oh, yeah. Insane. Like how sweaty I was watching that. Bro, I was. You're feeling for him?

Now, Corey, Corey, okay. Corey said on our text thread with the, with the with the company he was like I mean isn't this easy for a guy like Alex which

you would say yes I mean the dude is free free solo half dome which is like slicker than that brick wall yeah yeah and it's you know twice as high twice yeah but again

he was down playing it you're saying yeah yeah you get out there and free solo 101 Taipei or whatever was it easy for McGuire to hit 72 bombs in 98? Well, maybe for him. So I said, was it easy for Rory to make the three-footer to win the U.S. No, he missed it.

1,667 feet. 101 floors. They did this in Taiwan capital of Taipei. It does casually waving the people. Did you watch the whole thing? Oh, I watched the whole thing. I couldn't, dude. I couldn't summit. To be honest.

I couldn't. When he was getting to the part where he had to climb out, I was like that. It's child's play for him, though. It really is. It is child's play. you are correct like that he has like a ladder for him it is like a ladder it's like laughing waving to the kids inside yeah there's people inside he was like turning around like he's crazy though he's making a mockery of it because he's so good his wife was laughing down below getting interviewed i'm

like dude there's no fear here there's just a market for that though you remember when we're younger like evil can evil was it doesn't believe it was bad but his was like 50 50's probably gonna get hurt this is like one out of a hundred something bad happens you oh you felt like this was a low because you know, like they knew. Yeah, it's not gonna happen. This was a P-A-T, snap hold kick. Alex, that was crazy.

Six figures for that. How much for you to do something like that? There's no money, is there? No, I don't know. I can't even do a pull-up. I could barely climb a tree when I was younger, so yeah. Oh, dude, when they were showing his, his, uh, strength, no, strength training when he was doing finger pull-ups.

Yeah. Like that? Dude's in, dudes. But I don't even care how strong you are physically. The mental block that is, like looking down 90-3. stories is just like I can do that with my eyes closed and get a little. The dude's a supernatural human. Stud.

Stud. Empire State Building. Next. Not on my list. No, I think he does something crazy. I think he goes and like, yeah, whatever the craziest free solo thing, he's going to do it live. And Elon Musk rocket ship as it's taken off.

He's as he's as crazy as that to do that, though. And it hang on for dear life just until he gets back down the earth. Dude, we had some fun. We got a voicemail question asking about cereal, which led us to the debate about what weird milk alternatives you would use in a pinch. We sat down with Ty and tried some ourselves. Take a look. We're gearing up for a major storm here in Texas while we're filming this. Have you got all your supplies in case we lose electricity? Well, gee, I spent an hour in the supermarket parking lot, couldn't find a spot. I'll probably try again after work. Why wait? You can just DoorDash right now and have everything you need delivered to your house. Let someone else pick it up and save yourself some valuable time.

As a parent, I would never have a minute for myself if it wasn't for DoorDash. That's a great idea, Gary. DoorDash has helped me out in a pinch when I'm too busy to make a home-cooked meal. What are you too busy doing exactly? You know, gaming. Ah, the games. Well, while I was at work and Kristen was busy homeschooling the kids, DoorDash got us everything we needed to prepare for this storm.

Flashlights, batteries, bottle water, and even earplug, so I can work from home and block out the noise. Well, this storm will bring some chaos. And so will my kids. So I'm going to use DoorDash to help me get ahead of it. Any other ideas to help me get through this snowstorm? I could send my kids to Uncle Sparky still, it's over? Not happening.

Well, when life gets crazy, DoorDash helps bring a little order to it. We had a voicemail come in and basically say like, hey, have you ever had to use something besides milk? In an emergency situation. You got no milk in the house for your morning cereal? No, I can't say that I have. And I said I used chocolate milk as a kid because it was like, if you don't have milk, just go to chocolate milk. That I could see.

But what's a level past that? Anything. We talked about water. You know, so like, sweet tea. Basically, we're going to have ourselves a little taste test. And this is just stuff in the fridge. We're not at it.

This is just like your sodas, your teas, your juices. I don't see a lot of those being a good fit. However, I'm willing and able. But, man, I don't know. I've never had an apple juice and fruity pebbles. it could be amazing. Apple juice and apple jacks. Oh,

Unreal. That's a power move. I never thought about that. It's these kind of things that we might be. We might be on to something. We might be on to something. So we thought, why not just try it live? I'm down.

On the pod. Yeah, boys, desperate times call for desperate measures. When the milk is expired or non-existent in your fridge, you need a bullpen, call on the bullpen. What are you going to? Because you're not willing to give up the cereal. Correct. You're still going cereal.

You're already doing. Oh, it's in the bowl. We've all done that. We've all done that. We've all done that. We don't go dry, but some would say maybe Pepsi and your Captain Crunch is better than dry Captain Crunch. Yeah, which we don't know. We don't know.

We have to taste it. Without further ado, let's get into it. So we've got some milk alternatives. We've got OJ, sweet tea, apple juice, coffee. These are just maybe something that would be laying around the house if you don't have your milk or it's expired. Yeah, sure. Your coffee, your cola, chocolate milk, Tang. I do love Tang.

I used to call it Tud. Valued. Kool-Aid. Sports drink. Apple, cider, vinegar. We're not going to say the last one either. Ranch dressing? That's where we draw the line.

We got wild on the last two. Here's a deal. What kind of cereals do we have? Yeah, that's actually the more important question. All right, Aaron, what cereals do we have over here? All right. Are you gentlemen ready? We have corn flakes.

We have classic honeynut Cheerios. It's a classic. Fruity Pebbles. We have some cocoa puffs. Yeah. Cinnamon Toast Crunch. The best, the goat. Fruit loops.

Yeah. And last but not least, we have Kempkunch. Okay. Okay. I say we start with either fruit loops or fruity pebbles and OJ. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you.

What do you think? Yeah. I like that. I think you either... We've got to pair our fruits right here. So it's either OJ or apple juice with the fruity pebbles. Okay. Like OJ and something bland like corn flakes.

Sure. You know what I'm saying? So maybe we go apple juice with our fruity pebbles and stay in the fruit category. I like it. I like it. Let's go apple juice. And, Fruity Pebbles. So first is Fruity Pebbles. We're gonna OJRFPs. Okay. Okay.

We're gonna AJ. We're gonna AJ our FPs. Too many acronyms. We love acronyms here in case you didn't know. Now are you gentlemen having a communal bowl or do you all want your own? We're commutable. Thank you ma'am. Okay. Here's what it looks like. I mean looks it looks like a standard issue bowl of fruity peels. This is OJ or or apple juice? That's AJ. That's orange juice. We orange juiced. We owe it. We're J our FPs. OJ your FPs real quick. I'm going big bite.

Oh, you pulled this. Oh, sorry, I didn't know you were going to shake it. Guys, guys. That is unbelievable. Wow. You guys want to orange juice, your fruity pebbles from now on. Wow. You don't want to go milk.

So good that I'm going in for another bite. That's incredible. I think it's what Benjamin Franklin felt when he discovered electricity. Wow. Boys. OJ. Your FPs. You heard it here first.

That enhances the fruity bubbles. It really does. Shockingly, yeah, it fits. It absolutely fits together. Wow. There's a little citrus kick to it, but it grows well with the fruity. Keep this here.

Keep this here. Let's go. Apple juice and fruit loops. Yeah. Yeah. Stay in the fruit category. That's a good pairing combo. It's really good pairing.

I think you're going to get that. You know how that fruit loops has the green, it has the apple? Yeah. But I think after this, this is where it's going to get tough. What is the ratio of liquid? to cereal. It doesn't matter. That's really good.

That is appropriate. You went a little heavy on the OJ with the EPs. I would agree. I really like to push my cereal down into the liquid. Okay. That was. Oh, this is a big bowl. That was truly remarkable.

All right. We got. We got the loops. We got loops. With some AJ. With A. You got to get the green in there. It's like a reverse.

If you see it coming, it doesn't work that well, but. No, call me crazy. I like this too. You know what? Call me crazy. I need a second. I need a second bite.

That was actually... That is. I mean, you just... That's really good. If you're going to fruit cereal, pair it with a fruit juice. Yeah. It makes too much sense.

Why'd we ever put milk in these? Shocking levels of consistency. I feel like I was robbed as a child. That's a win. That's a win. That's a win category. I don't know. I think every time I go to like a buffet at a hotel now,

I'm just like, I'm getting fruit loops and apple juice. Wow. Okay, so if your milk is gone, OJ is a win, apple juice is a win. If you have a fruit-based cereal. Or that's what we don't know, a plain cereal, too. I feel like they work really well with those. Do you want to try corn flakes in OJ?

Or tang? Tang. Corn flakes and tang. Corn flakes and tang. Might as well try it. Might as well. I mean, it can't be like horrible. Corn flakes are already horrible.

We know what we're pairing our chocolate milk with. When we get into the coffee, sweet tea, cola, that's going to be tough. That's where it's going to get. That's the dog days of the season. But right now, we've got wins. Dozer. Yeah, my fears we're about to be going downhill. I think we're actually really going to like this because Tang is a very punchy flavor.

With sea flakes, though? And you need it with something as plain and bland as sea flakes. It's going to bring the corn flavor down. I think you're really going to like that. Bring the citrus flavor up. I think you're really going to like that. No, you don't like it? No, for the first one.

Mm-mm. Mm-mm. No, it's regret. That one didn't work. No. That one didn't work. Why did that not work? That's atrocious.

Did we get the Blake all right? Why did that not work? Something about corn and tang. Look, that's a lot. That's an L. Don't do that one. That's an L. I really thought that was going to work.

I don't know what was going to work. I know. You know what could work there is chocolate milk. But you know what? It's fine. We're experimenting right now, and that does not work. That was our first L on the board.

Tang and corn flakes. Something about those two flavor combos does not work like the OJ and the apple juice and the fruity cereals. What should we pair with Captain Crunch? Captain Crunch. See, that's where I think your CTC could go with chocolate and milk can be just fine.

But you're trying to hold on a chocolate. You're trying to hold on in the chocolate. I think we need to try something kind of exotic here. Like coffee? Or we need to go Cola with our Captain Crunch. Captain Crunch already kind of hurts your mouth. So add the burn of some cola.

Give me cola and Captain Crunch. Yeah. For a thousand. Is that how you play Jeopardy? I don't know how to play Jeopardy. I'm not sure. Yeah, they always say big enough. Oh, we...

Hey, it happens. It happens. It happens. I was going to take those... I got too excited about the Coke and cereal right now. Those F-loops would have fit well in my pan. I'm having deja vu back to last night when Colton James tried to pour cinnamon toast crunch and he didn't realize it was turned the opposite. it way.

Oh, no. pours it out the bottom. He's past that age, too. He's not. This is going to be good. He's not. He's obviously not. Let's all take this bike together.

Put in the middle. Let's all get the reaction together. Let's get us. It looks weird. Yeah. Visually, it's not doing it for me. All right. Three, two.

Call me crazy. I love it. I could get on board. Let me taste this cola. I don't like this cola. Call me crazy. I couldn't be further out. No.

No, no, no, no, no. I mean, it's okay. It's better than the corner. flakes and days. I will say that. If I'm in dire need, I'm going here. I think we've been led to believe that liquid plays a bigger role than it does in the cereal. I like the burn of the cola. Yeah, and then it finishes off with a nice crunch. I like that. Yeah, if we end up in a doubt. This is like mid as the Jen Ziers would say. This is mid. It's not a W and it's not an L. It's a mid. It's got to be Dlaska, an ice apocalypse here in DFW for me to stoop that low. But I would. There is a world where I absolutely would. We'll see the things. thing that we don't have that would be in my house would be sparkling water. No. And now you're, see, that's where you're just like, that is digging deep. No, we're not doing that.

You're making ranch dressing sound good. Let's go back to what we think is going to be a win. So that's cocoa and chocolate milk? It's cocoa puffs and chocolate milk. This has to be. This one's been done before. This has to be good. But I'm just shocked it stopped here. I think chocolate milk would be good in almost.

Well, not the fruities, but I think it would be good in that. My question, what about chocolate and chocolate cocoa puffs and coffee? Little mocha You could do that too But I want to So then do, whoa So do we save chocolate milk For cinnamon toast crunch?

Sure Yes Yes So we go coffee and chocolate Okay Is this cold root coffee? Where did we get this coffee? Or cinnamon and coffee

I don't know I need somebody's got to make a call Let's go cinnamon Let's go cocoa and coffee Chocolate and coffee Okay cocoa and coffee And just clarification It is ice coffee

It's not hot coffee That's fine That's thank goodness I don't think we want to be putting hot coffee in our cereal. I would do it though. Especially hot liquid in a plastic bowl.

I'm not sure that would be. Yes. This is the Coco Gough. Is that her name right? Yeah. Yeah, it is. The Coco cough. Okay.

This one's gonna play. Yeah. You can tell. It's a good recruiting class. Like, hey, dude. This is gonna play. All right, hold your comments to yourself, Spart. This is gonna play.

Okay. Heavy coffee at the beginning. Yes. I was waiting for the kick. I'm a black coffee guy. I love that. I love that. I absolutely love that.

Hold on, let me give him some ASMR. What is that? Oh, not that kind of ASMR. I thought you were just doing a crunchy crunch. No, not that. Guys, I like that a lot. That's a win. That's a win for me.

That's a win. That's a win. That's a win. That's good. It's so good I'm going to have another bite. You do have to like the black coffee taste. Yeah, for sure. It's a strong coffee. But for the coffee people out there.

Yeah. And once you bite into the cocoa and then it mixes with the coffee, then it becomes really, really good. But if you don't like black coffee, that first bite is going to hit you a little. But if people don't like black coffee, they probably have... They probably don't have it at their house.

Or they probably have some sort of creamer. Just a creamer. Touch a creamer to it, and you're going to be good to go. So now let's go. I think we need to do something else radical before we go to our cinnamon toast with chocolate milk. Super Bowl. Or do we try...

We got honey nut Cheerio? Oh, did you eat Honeynut Cheerio? Or should we go sweet tea, honeynut Cheerio? Ooh. What do you think? I think we go. Sweet tea would be better than Gatorade in my opinion. Okay, let's go sweet tea and honey nutty

and honey nutterios. You're going to add that honey, that sweet for a four. I think this might play as well. This could be a dub. This has got dub potential. We are absolutely connoisseurs right now. Man. There's masters of wine and then there's masters of cereal.

And we might be the only three. The nostalgia is hitting very hard right now. We're not small yets, but we are. are cereal A's. Serioles. I hope that's not a word that means something crazy. Yeah.

Because I'm not that if it is. Yeah. We're just not that smart. Sweet tea and honeynut Cheerios. Hold your thoughts. Hold your thoughts, Spark. His face says it all. Bro.

That is unbelievable. That's incredible. That's incredible. Slaps is strong. No. It's just sweet. That one I only have above the tang. No. That's a dub.

That's a dub all day, dude. That's a dub and a half. I won't dub that. What do you not like about that? Get another bite. You didn't get a good bite. Maybe not a sweet tea bite, that guy? Maybe I didn't have my H-nuts doused.

Douse your H-nuts and tell me that's not good. It's just like a sweet, like, sugary. It's a win, man. I want it to be good. It's just not. I can't. You're crazy. Spark gets outvoted.

This is a dub in me and Gare's book. Sweet tea and Honey, That's a 500 season. That's the six and six season right there. Nobody's complaint. I almost, I would like actually to try a little just test. I think I could give this to my kids

and they would not even know that there wasn't milk in there. Does that say more about, and they couldn't see it. I agree. If you blind tasted this, people would be like, that's unbelievable. You're like, man, that's some good honeynut churios. All right, we saved the best for last.

Chocolate milk and cinnamon toast crunch. And cinnamon toast crunch. Oh, this is Shoahoe-O-Ton. Yeah, this is you'd pay max money. Deferred payments, whatever you got to do. We all agree, though. CTC is the greatest of all time. I actually, I like honey owes the best. O's cereal. And then CTC. Oh, goodness. Oh, boy, look at that. Yeah, that's, yeah. If that's not a win, I don't know what is. Chocolate milk and cinnamon toast crunch. Yeah. Mmm. Yeah. Holster the. Plastic spoon away. Wow.

That's the pop I'm looking for. Yeah, that's... That's the best one yet. Thank you, chef. Yes, chef. Thank you, chef. Unbelievable. Thank you, chef.

That's something I get behind. It is a lot of sweetness. I will say. That's my only... It's a milkshake. It's a milkshake. It is a kid's milkshake. If you gave that to your kids,

they would be like... They're on a sugar rush until next Tuesday. Oh, I think we need to try something just silly. I would rather not. We need to go silly here. Okay, like ranch dressing? You're going ranch dressing? I don't want a hard dressing because that's my favorite condiment.

I can't. Let's go apple cider vinegar. That's better. Let's go apple cider vinegar. Do we have any cereals we haven't used yet? No, we've used them all. No, you've used all of them. Okay, I think you've got to have some sort of taste.

I think you got to go like Captain Crunch. Really? I was going to say honeynut Cheerios. With apple cider? Yeah. All right, let's try it. Let's try it. It's like a honey vinaigrette.

I am going straight back to that chocolate milk, though, because that was... So we only really had one bad one in that, which is crazy. Taming flakes. We had a bad mid, and then the rest for, like, kind of wins. Yeah.

Okay. We have been lied to as kids. Milk? Golly. I kind of smells like dirty socks. That's not dirty socks. Dude. Hey, if you're a little sluggish,

in the morning and you need to wake up. And you need to wake up. Just make sure to have the trash can close. No, this is gonna be fine. This is gonna be fine. You eat apple, you eat apple cider vinegar to like flush your system or something, right? It's good for your immunity.

It's a pair of nice and socks. It smells like a volcano experiment when you're in third grade. Oh, I gotta go back. All right. Oh, it's such a strong vinegar taste. Do you just wanna drink some chocolate milk? Well, that one's an L.

Don't. I would say, I would say actually don't try that one at home. No. If you only have... If you only have apple cider vinegar... Choose a different breakfast. What are you doing?

Cereal, I highly recommend you fast through breakfast. Oh, just... Yeah, make it to lunch. Why is it taste still in my mouth? I don't know. You got to chase it. That's so weird, though, because I love salt and vinegar chips. But you pour it in a bowl and eat it as a liquid.

Yeah, that's tough. I hated that. I hated everything about that. I'm a lover of vinegar, too. Oh. That's not that, man. All right, well, I think that's a wrap on that segment. We need to try ranch dressing.

No, no, no, no, no. I think we do. I really do. You can? I will support you. I will definitely support you. I'm just going to go ahead and throw it to the next segment. Me and ranch have gotten along for way too long, man.

What cereal would pair best with ranch? Corn flakes. Corn flakes, for sure. Yeah. Really? Some kind of keto. The tang and flakes scared me, dude. You can't do that.

I'm not allowing you to do that. You can't do that. You can make casseroles with corn flakes. Okay, give me ranching corn flakes. I'm not doing that. Give me ranch and corn flakes. There was a pretty solid chance I throw up on set, but... I'm going to throw up if you throw up.

Dude, the people, we're doing it for the people. They need to know. But the listeners aren't even seeing this, man. They're just listening. Oh, the listeners should go watch this one. Okay, this is one you should watch. This isn't even going to pour. It doesn't even have, like, consistent.

Oh, God. Oh. No. That's good. That's good. That's good. I won't partake in this. Have to, dude. Just one little bite. You can't think cereal. You gotta think casserole.

Just think, oh, it's like a... I hate... Yeah, but not all ranch is made equal either. It's like a... Like a... Oh, God. No, bro. I'm not touching you. It looks like gravy. Yeah, it does. No, you can't eat that. Think of it as yogurt.

All right, well, as Ty... I think I'm there mentally, but I'm just making sure. I'm disgusted. I think somebody needs to do this with me. Yeah. I'll do it with you, Ty. I could, dude, I can't get on. Well, I will do it if you... If I don't die.

If I see your facial reaction, I'm just like... Okay, it's just a casserole. This is, hey, Aunt Susan made a casserole, and we're having mashed potatoes, and it's like a cold potato salad that's weird. Why do you have such a big bite? Oh. I'm not making eye contact.

I refuse to. I'll let you guys hear it. Oh. It's not as bad as the vinegar, can tell. This is a mental game though. You gotta be you gotta be locked in up here. You cannot think cereal. If you think cereal you're gonna puke. You gotta think casserole. I just spit some out. Yeah you did. See my favorite bowls of cereal though are ones where I'm not having to mentally. It's if you think cat I need you we're not don't even look at the cereals. Casserol.

I just I can't take that big of a bite. Yes you can I can't. It's a casserole. No. It's a casserole. No it's not. It's a cassero. Trying to get as much flake as possible. He's trying to flake it all it is is a casserole Remindery we have about eight hours on set after this It's a casserole Casserol It's a casserole Hold it in there, Gare

I'm eating a carrot Yeah, it's a carrot It's a carrot It's a carrot It's a carrot crunchy I don't know That one's pretty bad It's better than the vinegar

I will say I think you need a bite spark No, I'm okay Just a one flake But Sparks I feel like it's a day I'm not going back to it I really do

Yeah hey sparks don't do it Boy, safe to say, I think it's time for a little palate cleanser. I agree. Welcome, Corey Cotton to the set. How you doing, buddy? I'm doing great, brother. Thanks for having me. Same with your chest.

That was soft. I was like, I'm doing great, man. I love it here. There you go. Okay. That's better. What you've been up to, man? Oh, dude, it's just been kicking it.

We, uh, the update is the last time I was on, I said that I'm about to go to San Diego to see nose doctor to see if I can taste together. Right. And smell. That's tomorrow. Wow, dude. I'll be thinking about you. Real talk.

You've been struggling with that for, long time now. Just six years. Six years is an insane amount of time to not taste smell. Everything tastes like paper. So have you found like the origins of what caused it or is that what we're doing? That's why we're going tomorrow. Okay. We've gone through Western medicine. We've gone through holistic medicine. You've tried at all. It's like the Patagonia bats or whatever that started COVID that did it. Dude, if I got bit by a bat. Yeah. Wouldn't that be horrible to get bit by a bat and not turn into Batman? You just lose your taste and smell. Yeah. That's not. It's not in the comic books, dude. That's unfortunate, man.

Like getting bit by a spider, you don't have web shooting out of you. It's like, what are we even doing? Yeah. Just a classic. You got the bad into that. Yeah. So we'll see. TBD.

Great. About four kids. My life is crazy. Yeah, four, man. How many kids do you want to have one day? Two. I know we're currently working on just getting... Generally, you find the woman before you found the kid.

That's usually the order of operations there. But in a dream world, a girl boy combo. We're in dire times right now, sparks. Well, dire times is strong. You know, I'm not 35. until March. Oh, dude. And my 35 is like 24, you know?

You know, speaking of birthdays, you know, my wife looked at me the other day and she was like, so you're going to be 40 in like a year in, you know, four months. She's like, I got to start planning your 40th because you're going to want something extravagant. Dang straight. Whether you say you want something extravagant or not. Oh, she knows. 40's a big number.

40 is a big number. 40 is a big number. Actually, it's a large number. You're getting up there, dude. You look great, though. I don't know, man. I'm a broken human, dude. My calf, like, hurts every time I run, which is not normal.

It's just, dude, it's bad. I wake up and I feel like I deadlifted, like, 800 pounds, you know, like lower back. No, no, didn't even deadlifted. It was just like, it was, I think it was just the mattress did a number on me. It's bad, dude. So were you to the point where, like, dismissive of birthdays, like, you don't want to be celebrated to make a point of how, we're getting. Oh, no, I don't, I don't mind that. Like birthdays or birthdays, dude. Sure. Yeah, you only get one a year. You might as well take advantage of it. You know what? That brings me to my next

quote that, look, if you're getting to the game of golf, yeah, this is somebody, I forget who said this. I think it might have been Ben Crenshaw, but you get 18 balls of a golf round, 18 shots to tee that ball up. Use them, okay? Stop trying to prove to me on a par three that you can smoke a seven iron off the flush grass. Interesting. And that's why I bring three sleeves to the golf course. So I use every single golf ball, you know? No golf ball left behind. I figured you weren't going here, but the golf quote that I like is from Colin Cowherd.

And he says, any company that cares about its trajectory should not hire people that like golf. That's true, too. There's a ceiling to how much they're willing to work for you. Because at the end of the day, and you look at there. Wait, doesn't our CEO like golf? He does too much. Yeah, a lot of people in our company like it too much. If you're listening, we're about to have a nice little.

Andrew, Will. We have a whole list of people that there's a ceiling to how hard they'll work. Don't take this personally. Colin Kyle heard said this. Because they're not going to get rid of golf in their life. You're not going to get rid of golf in your life. Once you're in. All I can do is just come here, do the minimum amount of work

to just think about rolling some putts on the green. Is that where your podium mantra came from is golf? At some point it might be. I know what I can get first. The mindset actually comes from Be Ratt or Be Happy. It's like you don't want to put too high of expectations that are, you know, unattainable. I don't know which father figure in my life told me that one.

Don't reach for your dreams, Garrett. Just stay right here. That's the same time, though. You do strive not to get last. Yeah, I mean, I guess you can, you know, To be right or be mine, you know, could be the Aggies. I don't know what it is. Yeah, you approach your sports life that way with caution.

I think it's worth for you. Smart man. It's worked for you. Boys, we've got some dude perfect announcements. Tour tickets. They're going fast, man. Our biggest, largest tour yet. And we're doing the squad games.

this year. We are. And the special thing about that is we got some large content creators. I just thought of it, dude. If Corey fixes his taste, we can do a food, a food, a food, like a food tasting for one of the comps. Oh, I would love that. Wow, he, but he doesn't even, he forgot what everything tastes like. He might have exquisite. He might have a like pepperoni pizza. Like, it's kind of one of those things where they tell you if you have like a brain injury, you could wake up with like a new skill. Dude, I could be a Somali. Dude. But of everything immediately when I come back. That's what I'm, that's what I'm hoping for. Maybe you haven't even entered your prime yet, man.

That's special. Yeah, tour ticket's going to be fun. Me and Corey will probably be on the injured reserve because we're old. Yeah. I'm on the up, dude. I'm not. I'm on the down, dude.

I'll bring you with me. We're going to grind me, though. The group's been grinding in prep for squad games. I have two. I've been grinding and then I get injured because I maybe lifted a 10-pound weight. I don't know. In your dreams.

In the 800-pound squadding in your dreams. We'll be, hey, we're going to get right. All right. Seriously, though, jump on those 10. tickets, 22 shows, brand new squad games, top style. We're really excited about that. It's not a charity tour either from a winning and losing standpoint. There will be a winner and there will be a loser.

Sure. Yeah, because Ty would not have anything else. In previous tours, there's five of us and four people lose. And it's kind of like, all right, the focus is on the one person that won. Yeah. This is going to be like, it's like a football game. Yeah, sure. There is a winning team and a losing team.

Right. There's going to be little kids that go home utterly disappointed because, Dude, perfect loss, which we will. We're not going to go 24-0, dude. We're still undefeated right now. Unless we hire Signetti, I don't think we're going undefeated. I love that guy.

I do too, man. Man. We'd never lose. Did you guys see his daughter's post? No. I guess like in 2019 or 2022. Whenever he was at JMU, I think he had a good year. And she was like literally like tweeted out a screenshot of like,

are you happy? And he literally said, no. And so this time, people were begging her to, like, ask her dad. Like, are you happy? People are wondering. And he emphatic yes. A couple exclamation points. I actually thought he was going to say no.

I thought he's going to double down. That would have been amazing. Absolutely not. We got recruits to lock in by next fall. Well, they better be locked in for North Texas, week one next year. I'm going to go to that for sure. That's going to be really cool. In the college roommates, yeah, we got them week one, bending national change.

At their house. Yep. So I'm excited to see like the, I'm sure they'll hang the banner. Oh, yeah. And I've always heard the Indiana fan base is really nice. Had a bad run in at LSU. I'll tell you what, they are, they gave it to us. Dude, look, I've already had my time of calling out a fan base.

I'm done with those days. Smart man. Smart man's growth right there, here, here. I would never do that again unless it's about the longhorns. That is complete growth. I can stoop there again. You've called out fan bases, Sparky's called out holidays. Yeah. In the comment section, at least, it didn't go well for either of you.

No, it didn't. Dude, it didn't, man. It didn't. But it, you know, that's what it's for, though. Yeah. Honesty. It's for just. This is a safe place.

It's a safe place. I love it. It's just a comfy house with buds. We're truthful. We love each other. We also love mini games, which is coming out. Be on the lookout for mini games. That's launching February 6th on the app and 7th on the tube.

I think it's the best mini games we've ever done. That's what Tim said. And editor Tim generally shoot you straight, you know? Let's just say we might be floating human beings. Like legit floating them. Yeah. What I have heard, if you're a fan, is that you will feel the most connected. to this mini-games of anyone before

because the point of this specific mini-games battle is that the dudes are guessing live about whatever the situation is. For example, we floated with extremely large balloons a human. Okay, that's all I'll say

for now. How many balloons does it takes the float a human? We saw the balloons and had to guess how many. And why it's going to be fun for you at home is you can't compete along with us if it's a running battle. But you can look at the screen and go, oh, it's going to before. It's going to be nine. You can argue with your siblings about it. And then you're going to find out. And that's what Tim said is you're, he's watching the edit and he's like, man,

it makes you as a viewer want to play along. And I am going to go ahead and predict this is not the last how many, many, many games video we do. I loved it. It was a great time to guess. How many, many games will do perfect do in the future. That's inception levels of dude perfect right there. Yeah. Well, boys, let's cut to the chase. It's time for my favorite segment, almost athlete fan fails. We've had some submissions. We've got some white boards. We're going to grade them, baby.

We're going to grade them. I'm so glad. I'm here for this. I want to let the people know that we're not laughing at you. We're laughing with you. We've all had almost athlete moments. Yeah. I have been laughed at in these situations a lot.

So if we do happen to laugh at you, it's okay. I'm trying to think of like one really good one for me. Like, I wish I had video of, I surely, I mean, I wish I had video of the Michael one I did when I broke my ankle. Yeah. What? Isn't that not, isn't that the nice thing, though? that's what I was saying about these almost athlete fails.

You can't get away with almost athlete fails like he once could. There's a camera in every corner. There's a cell phone in every hand. No, but that also means I haven't gone to a wedding in a while because I'm kind of over that season. But that means the new way to do the rehearsal dinners are going to be days long because of all the footage they have on you. There was like three pictures that my mom could pull from like, look at you as a kid. That's a good point. Now it's like, let me show you the year and the life of said person.

Yeah. All your worst moments. We're just going to play those back to back in the 4K. Whether you've tried a trick shot and failed or just had an awkward sports moment that was captured on camera. Go to almostathletes.com and if we like it, we'll feature it. Almostathletes.com. Send in the fails, the funny stuff, falling off the bikes and, you know, those are always good.

If you're going to have gotten hurt, you might as well get it on the pod. You know, we obviously are praying for a full recovery. Full recovery. Accidents happen, though. Injuries happen. Yeah. How you respond. Now I'm going to walk out of here and have like a horrific injury.

Like break my shin and half or something. Step on a sunflower seed like L.C. Torree. Let's start it off. Ask you, Paul. Colby Adams. Kobe Adams sounds like a hooper. Uh, does. Oh.

Friendly fire. Run that back. I wasn't expecting that. And she's like, boom. Neither was she, dude. Neither was she. Boom. Oh, WWE.

Uh, I don't. First of all, there's a lot to go here. Number one, this is a full court press. It is. The offensive team has the ball all the way down at their end. No threat to shoot whatsoever. Hold on. We're about to see an MJ junk from the free throw line, I think.

From the free throw line. Did she take off from the free throw line? Okay, just barely in front of it. And why is she going to block a shot? Dude, this is electric. Who's almost fail is that? You know, that's a conglomerate. It's like when you get a sack in the NFL and they share.

The fail is the jumper because, like, dude, like. 100% the jumper. The person just got beat on the, she was just. just fighting for the ball. Absolutely. She went from fighting for the ball and fighting for a life. Guys, look at the slight fake that the ball handler had. Hold on. Watch this.

She goes a slight fake and just step through. She didn't get hit at all. Yeah. Dude, she took nothing. Needless to say, they need to score on that five on three. Yeah, I got two. You got a good look. They kept going. Yeah. This is really good.

That's a great one. That's one of the better ones we've seen. Are we going out of ten? Out of ten. Ten being the greatest. You better. ever seen. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That one's good to me. That's a nine for me. What did you go? I went eight. I went Ocho. Great. That's great. I went full nine.

That's 26. 26. That's for exceptional. Kobe Adams. That's one of the best ones we've seen. I appreciate you, Colby Adams, for sending that in. I would like to know who Colby is in that situation. Yeah. I'm all right. Next up. Jennifer Williams, this is involving a scooter for the people listening. We're watching security camera footage. It looks like. I had the best almost athlete moments happen in driveways. They do.

This could be bad. Oh, no. Oh, no. No adjustment whatsoever. So two kids going up the driveway. Oh, and then the dad comes running out of... That's a pro dad. That's a pro dad is building them a sport court.

Look at that. Oh, that is sick. What is that? Like a little rink back there they're building? Well, if it was a skating rink, he just canceled. Look at the mom. Like, even the dog. Or is that a squirrel?

Even the pet came to check on the young man. Two kids, one on a bike, one on a scooter. And the scooter got away from the kid and he goes barrels into the wall. I mean, that is a tough. Dude, he also tried to go away, but then he just goes straight up hands to the wall. Boom. I just, dude. Yeah, this reminds me of a truck stick worthy.

Third grade North Trail. I froze up. Brozone was going down a hill bike and just totally forgot how to ride it, clipped a windshield, clipped a rearview mirror with the handles. Well, made him turn. I wonder. I like this one. I feel for the kid.

I don't know why he turned so quickly, though. But, um, he froze. For me. Six for core. Liked it. Seve. Seve. 13.

21. Thank you, Jennifer. Oh, no. Pole Vault. I do love the family effort on that last one to help get up. That's not good. Pole vaulting is a... I hope I've been a few of a pole vault for a long time.

My eraser. You're... What do they say when you ride a motorcycle? It's not if you fall off a cycle. when pole vaulting has got to be the same thing. It's not if you have a massive fail, it's when. So, Luke, Feldman, pole vault. I'm already sore, just thinking about what's going to happen.

Oh, oh, he's coming in. Pull vault. He's up. He. Oh! Oh! Oh, what did he? Oh.

Did he hit his head in the place where you put the pole? Wait, what is he hitting? Oh, he gets partial mat, which helps. Why is he bounced so hard off that mat? Look at the reverb. Is there a gap in the mat? Yeah, there's a gap in the mat. But he's not hitting the floor, though.

He's hitting the mat, but straight face. Straight face. This is one of those ones you have to pop up. This is why you don't love pole vault. Oh! That's a broken nose. It's something. Did he get back on the horse after that?

Yeah, I think so. I think he's a wild human. I do not think he did. You know the wrist going in. That is a great. That's another really good one. He also was not even remotely. He also was not even remotely close

He was getting over that bar. No, not even remotely close. The force over those. Yeah, that's another eight for me. That was really good. I got to know, Luke. What did? Avoided serious injury.

What is it? It's six for me. Eight. Double Ocho and a six. 22. I got to know if he broke a nose. I need you to call in. Sorry about that.

Luke laughing with you. Yeah, I'd rather it be our Luke who did something like that. And we got Madeline. Oh, this is like... Francescone. Francescon? Francesconi. Yeah, you never know.

Powerlifting, this can't go good. Please don't tell me she cleans this and then falls down. I can't handle that. Yeah. It's like the arm wrestling ends with the arm snaps. I don't want to see anything snap here. Don't do it. Don't do it.

She's going to clean it. I don't want to see it. Oh, she's going to clean it. I hate this. She cleaned it. She cleaned it. Okay. Oh, no.

She's up. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. She's going to press it. She's going to press it. No dislocations. No dislocations. Oh, gosh. Oh, oh. Oh, she got out of the way. Okay. Okay. I thought MCL, ACL, and PCL were all non-existent, but I think she's okay. I think she survived. Again, she got off balance on the, the clean press. She goes knee, which could have been very bad, but then at the last moment, athlete. Athlete, yeah, she got out of there. out of the way the ankle is completely turned. That's a high ankle spring. Did she catch some shin splints from the bar?

Did the bar hitter? I don't think so fairly. If that catches a knee. That knee's done. This is a good time just to say like, you know, power lifting is a, is it a sport? Oh, most definitely. Definitely.

It is. Definitely. Yeah. Why? Because it's hard. Because, yeah, I think it takes quite the athletic discipline and skill. Just to lift strength, strength-wise. Sure.

You want to be on record saying it's not? Yeah, you know, I don't know, dude. You know, no, me and the USA Weightlifting League get along great. Of all the people in the world to have mad at you, the world's strongest people, not my top choice. Super good sport. Yeah. Yeah, put some respect on them, Gary. If you want to take that argument to NASCAR, by all means.

But that's a fine for me. Because she gracefully avoided disaster. I think if there was more disaster, that number goes way up. I think she's, she's happy that our numbers are a little lower. I agree. 16. I've seen the passouts where they just turn. That's where I thought we were headed.

That's where I thought we were going to a passout. The reason why I asked about weightlifting being a sport is because, man, when I'm, when I'm over here lifting, you know, 20s on the bar, I don't feel very athletic. Sure. She's out cleaning all of us, by the way, too. Oh, she's cleaning me. Did you see that? I don't know what 83 kilograms is, but that's more than I can do.

Oh, I can't. Can someone bring in a shovel so that Garrett can continue to do? try and dig himself out of. Oh, no, I don't need to dig myself out of the hole. I mean, I think, look, breakdancing's in Olympic sport. You can say powerlifting is too. I just, I don't know, maybe it's just not my cup of tea. Did you all have a whole segment on the break dancing situation from this past Olympics? We haven't talked about it yet, but we did talk about it. Can she come on the pod? I would love to have her on the pod and have a dance off. I guess one of the greatest things has ever happened on TV. Well, I don't know about that, dude, because you might win. That's why.

It would be, you know, advantageous for me. I can't. We gotta move on. 183 pounds is quite the clean. Yeah, I'm not cleaning that. All right. Tyler Baker, basketball. If I don't see a poster dunk here. Being in that, it's an almost athlete moment. Oh!

That's the greatest thing because, okay, let me explain what happened. The guy got a call foul and out of frustration, he spiked the ball. He spiked the ball. It spiked on his foot, hit the ref. Here's the deal. He spiked the ball right in front of the ref. I have been ejected from game you have from spiking the ball

it was already a crazy move and dude did he get a tea please tell me you got a tech Nicole that feels very tech right there you can tell he's eyeball and here's the foul call good foul call then he eats one to the chops

with the whistle in you're liable to lose a chickling he's getting a tech oh I'm so quick just ripping a tea right there I gotta know dude did he did he get a tech you gotta you gotta email me you got to comment All right, hey, we're going to say this. For future submissions,

it's great if you keep the clip short. We need a less than one paragraph answer of what happened after. Yeah, that's great. Let me explain my situation because I alluded to it. Between 10th and 11th grade, I go playing the Summer League

because it's just like get to know my new teammates. A brand new coach for Prosper High School that year. Yeah, Coach Edwards. It's coming to the game. First game back. I've known all these guys. I grew up with them. went to middle school with him.

And so it was first game back with these guys. And I'm playing pretty good. I like to say that I'm a defensive-minded type player. Like I like to hustle. Sure. And that the ball stolen, tried to hustle back, take a charge. I could have sworn my feet were set, dude. Surely.

I mean, they were more set than, you know, gets up, calls a foul on me. I get up and I slam the ball against the wall. As one does. Auto. That's auto tech. Oh, it was. It was auto tech. What?

Technical. Well, everyone knows this about me. Until about two weeks ago, I was very, uh, rage got the better of me. Until two weeks ago. You were susceptible to the rage bag. Yeah, it's a brand new. It's a resolution. That could wear off too, but.

Yeah, I forgot this. And, uh, so I was walking off and there's two refs in a game. One by one under the basket, one at, uh, mid court. I go and I tell that ref politely in the nicest way that he needs to find a new partner because that dude's the worst ref I've ever seen. Wow. Auto,

Boom, tech ejected from the game. In a matter of five seconds, my coach is there, my brand new coach, he meets me in the bathroom. It was not pretty, dude. Yeah, that's a tough first encounter with the new head man. Dude, I ran, I had to run so many,

so many sprints. And I had to make, and the thing is, too, coaches listening. It's not about penalizing the one guy that makes the mistake. Yeah. It's about penalizing your team.

And boy, did I penalize my team. I bet. They didn't a lot. Yeah. Made some enemies that day. Did they make you not run and watch them run? Yeah, that's been happy. That's happened too.

It's like, oh, you messed up. Cool. Teammates, go sprint until you puke. Tough. Freshman year college, I have a quick rough story when I was in Stripes, man. It was my gig, my freshman year college.

I was actually kind of quickly rising the ranks to the point that the refs association was like about to give me a varsity girls game. So I'm on the rise. Meteoric rise. I'm making beautiful calls. One night in Valley View changed my life. I had middle school girls game and I do not regret the call. I can still see it in my head. Eighth grade girls game. Girl blocks a shot and like pushes her down through the ball to

the floor. Immediately I'm like boom boom boom, boom. We're going to jump it. We're going to jump it up. Jump it up. Yep. Of course you have a, I hear a dad's voice in there. Stripes, you're going to get somebody hurt out there. I'm like, oh, this is bad. Proceed the game finishes. Walk out to my 04 must Dang blue. She was good. Totaled her a couple years later. Walk out. He follows me to the car.

Oh, no. Yeah. Don't do that, by the way, if you're a parent at home. But anyhow, my Mustang took about a mile on the service ride. I said, I'll never do this again. Never did it.

That was the last time I officiated. What he said he said? You missed it. You blew it. You're going to get somebody hurt out there. And I wanted to pop around and say, hey, dude, she's not Cheryl Swoop. She's on the B team.

But I didn't. But I didn't. I held back. I was the bigger man that day. But I all. also gave up my whistle. That's what did it? That's what did it.

No way. That's all it took. Were you closer to continuing in basketball ref world or an umpire world? Umpire world. That was real life for a while. Oh yeah, that was real life to that. But middle school girls, we're not officiating those anymore.

That was the last. That was really good. Funny. I'm going to give it a seven. Yeah. I love surprises and that surprised me. 18. The eight spot for me.

23. I got to give it to Colby Adams coming in a hospital. Not right off the bat. That was just funny. I mean, jumping through the girl and knocking her completely off-killed. Yeah, they'll talk about that story for years, you know?

And I wonder, did the ref get it right in that game? Can we establish one of my favorite things, SportsCenter, maybe they still do it, is they have the like raining not top 10 clip that is like always on a pedestal until it gets bumped off? We might should explore that. Yeah, we should explore that.

I like that idea. If you have a winner, just run it back. Sure. They're on the podium until somebody takes it from. The last one? Was it the Mormon bike? Mormon bike was great. Did it win? I think so.

Yeah. At a minimum, we need to do a best of coming up and establish our pedestal. Sure. We can move forward with that. I agree with Corey on this. That's great. Well, that's always a fun segment. Another fun segment, voicemails.

Yes. All right, this segment is brought to you by DoorDash. When Life gets crazy, DoorDash helps bring a little order to it. Just ask this guy next to me. I love Dorcas. I almost feel like. He should have been the one. Actually, go ahead, Corey.

Yeah, go ahead. Read it. Guys, this segment is brought to you by DoorDash. When life gets crazy, as it does, DoorDash brings a little order to it. Ooh, well done from a guy who's on the Mount Rushmore for Dordash. For his sandbox before. Eight 50 pound bags of sand.

I saw a guy show up, pull him right out of the back of his camry, sand corn right into the back of it. Tough luck. Hey, thanks, dude. Thanks. See, that is the common misconception about DoorDash. It's, you know, they think it's just a food thing. No, no, no.

I ordered a ladder He door dashed A ladder We need to have a segment What Corey hasn't dashed We really do It's a short list It's a short list

I bet you've searched If they could watch the kids He's gonna door dash a washer and dryer I know it Some guy's gonna get there with his Hyundai sonata and be like I can't fit this in my I like that idea

For how many times you've dashed You have had fails I remember being up at HQ2 And all of a sudden there was like Thai food up there Corey C immediately calm I was like

Hey brother I don't think you meant to send this in this here I'll be there in a second That happened at least three times 100% It's not perfect But since we love being a show

You can watch you as a family We would love to settle your family arguments Answer your parenting questions Or hear your family's hot takes Sparky Yeah I know you have some family arguments

that we can settle So Mama Spark Send them in VoiceMell 972 805 866 Actually now I'm thinking about How have we not

had your mom on the set live. Yeah, I was waiting for y'all to say that. And, yeah, well, she's, she's, I get a lot of my personality from her. Three. Mother's day's coming up. Oh, we got to do that. My mom would probably jump on it. Hey, here's the deal, Sparks.

I'll take a seat. I'll take a step off the seats. We got Sister one, two, three, Sparks. Yes. Mom, what a segment. That would be. Comment below if you want. Mama Spark and the sisters on the show.

Sparks fly. Yeah. I like it. Let's check out some voicemails. Let's do it. Hey, guys. My name is Caleb from Saskatchewan, Canada. Love the POD.

My sister and I listen every week. I'm 13 years old, and I've been having voice cracks lately, and they're not going away. I have four sisters, and they're making fun of me all the time, and it's getting harder to sing at church. Anyway, I'm wondering if any of you have gone through this and have any tips for me. I'd greatly appreciate it. The courage, first of all. The courage. Hey, you're not alone there.

Is it Caleb? Caleb, was it Caleb? Caleb, appreciate the call in first and foremost. But you're not alone. Kobe is known for the voice. He still does it. I know, and he's 30. He's 30.

So you have time, Caleb. That's just a waiting game, isn't it? Yeah, puberty happens at all different stages of life. Dude, I didn't hit it until I was like 29. For sure. He's 13. He's already ahead of me. I think our advice would simply be realized,

number one, that it's a short period of time that it happens a lot, a lot. and just embrace it because it is funny. It is funny. And just play into it. Playing it church, baby. See loud. And here's the deal with sisters.

It's a tough game to play because if you make fun of them now, don't think he's going to have ammunition later. I'd maybe, you know, just let it slide. Yeah, I would let it slide a couple times because you don't want to get hit back when you're not expecting it. Sure. It's not fun. Right.

It's not fun. I remember the first time I could finally take my sister Julie in wrestling. she was a senior in high school I was a sophomore I finally got her but that was a huge day that was a huge day for me because I'm always said Julie he's gonna he's gonna get you

one day sisters it's coming it's coming for the sisters you wrestled your sister in high school long story I was trying to nap she was like jumping on me and I lost it save for the boss I snapped don't you worry about it

we might even have a wrestling match live on set it's gonna be such a good episode I was gonna talk about the lucky charms me eating every marshmallow out of the box was a bad one. Sister Brooke was going from the top rope, people's elbow. I love it.

Thank you for the voice. Yeah, thank you, Kaylee. Embrace it, dude. Embrace it. It won't last forever. And if it does, hey, you're just like Kobe Cotton. It happens soon. It happens.

No shame. What up, dude, it's Brandon again. I actually thought about a different question. I think this is a better question. I want to know what is the biggest animal you can take down with your bare hands. Like, it's a 1B1. We can say fight for the death, sure.

But what's the biggest animal you think you can take in a one-three-one match? I'll love to know. Thank you. It's a good question. One v.1 with I would be interested to hear Tye's answer because he... Tye's going to say... Grizzly bear. He's going like...

Rino. Two rhinos. Two rhinos I could take as long as I didn't have anything in my hands. I know I can take a dog down. I do it to my dog all the time. It's a little bit bigger than a dog. Like a donkey? A pig?

Donkey. I don't think I could take a donkey. Donkeys are, they're planted more than you think they are. I don't know, man. Yeah, be careful. Be careful because it's going to end up being a car jiu-jitsu moment. And then all of a sudden, Jared's going to be like, hey, dude, we got a donkey in. You said you could do it.

Watch out. Yeah. Tread lightly. True story. I think probably pig? First of all, I have no desire to get in a 1 v1 with an animal. He's the funniest video ever. That guy who squares up.

The guy who squares up. Oh, my gosh. Is that real or fake? Did anyone ever solve it? I was on the, I think it's real. I was real. I'm hoping it's real. Well, also just how like that, remember that also the kangaroo that like went to the person's window and like it was like a horrible movie?

Yeah, all the thing was just looked like Brian Urlacker of kangaroos. Ripped. Yeah, I think this answer for me is pretty, like a lamb. I think you can really like a pig. Yeah. Yeah. Other than that, I can see, you know, I'm not trying to go with a big cat or something. Oh, bear would absolutely demolish me, mountain lion demolish me.

No interest in that. I could probably take a bobcat. I would think. Coyote I could probably take. Sure. And the tough part about animals is like when you can see it or tap, they don't know what you're saying.

You know, you can't just tap out. If it's like a predator, it's unfortunately it's fight to the death. That's, it's, it's Coliseum style rules. Sounds like a D.P. If it's a predator, dude, like they ain't stopping. So it's, uh.

Yeah, I was going to say more like sign me up for a fainting goat, one of the ones where you just fuck up. How do you just follow over. You don't even have to like, honestly get a little. A little back. Behind the scenes,

remember that was going to be our mascot instead of panda. Instead of panda. We wanted to get a real life feigning goat and put it in the backyard and college station. Tough to get a hold of. Yeah. But core, tell the reason why it's a little behind the scenes

on why we even chose panda. Well, first of all, we couldn't find a fainting goat. That was one of those like sounded fun in the moment. And then we like did like five minutes of work on it and couldn't find one. Yeah.

And so then we get on the worldwide web, Amazon. And we start looking around for costumes. and the first one. No, second. What? Ant eater? Yeah, that's right. Oh, I blocked that out of my mind

because that was such a bad idea. The dude perfect, ant eater. Yeah, we were going to go ant eater, but the costume was just... It was more expensive. It was like 400 bucks, and then scrolls along Panda. Panda.

80 bucks. Cheaper, and we thought everyone loves a panda. Who doesn't like pandas? Fair? And then that's how we got it. You were bowling on a budget? Yeah. And speaking of that,

I could take down a panda. panda. I think so. Yeah, absolutely not. Yeah, I could, that would be a fun little wrestling match. Me and a panda. I feel like the pandas could kind of almost sense that we're on their team, you know, at this point. Oh, I just kidding. Dude, I can take down a baby panda. 280 pounds? I don't know, dude. That would be. I bet they're so strong. Oh, yeah, 280 pound. I'm dying. For sure. No question. I thought they were a lot smaller than that. Dude, they're huge. What are you thinking of? That thing would kill me. They're like the really athletic offense alignment where it's like

those things climb trees and hang like those things are physical specimens you haven't seen Kung Fu Panda recently I just rewatched it highest bite force relative to body size among bears look I say a lot of uh they look innocent questionable things that was one of them

I'm sorry I can't take it back yeah take it back in one episode Gary's taken on look at that thing oh yo you're toast dude we need to kind of play into the panda being kind of more ferocious yeah What do we do in here? The vangs on that thing?

He also looked like you got braces at a young age incredibly straight teeth on that panda bear. Really nice. They look lovable, but they will take it to you. We're on our voicemail block. One of our most common voicemails that calls in is who is panda. Anybody want to take that?

At the end of the day, we said a long time ago that we'll never reveal that. We might like on our... Really? I was about to just say it. No, we can't reveal that. We can't reveal that. Panda's panda. and actually to be completely honest with you,

like to the pod, I actually don't know who Panda is. He's just Panda. That's what I know. Like, I'm being completely... I do. I'm being completely honest with you. I don't know.

Me too. I wish I had his workflow. Maybe that guy pops in, like, on a Tuesday and then, like, the following Friday. Elite. He's got it pretty... Next question. Elite schedule.

There was a long period of time where people thought it was you. Yeah. Me? Me? Yeah. But it ain't. my question today is for Corey.

Oh. I wanted to know, is there a specific reason why he chose the color pink? Is there a deeper meaning? Or do you think the pink area just sounds cool? I'm OJ from Detroit, Michigan. Detroit? OJ, my guy.

Great question. I've been getting that a lot from people on the street. You know, it was more about my dislike for yellow than my love for pink, though I do love pink. I just felt like, and y'all would all agree with this, except for Garrett, we all just kind of ended up with a color. Yeah.

There wasn't like a ton of thought that went into it. And I always felt like yellow was... You got shafted on the color, dude. It was pretty lame. You got, you got... I thought it was bottom of the barrel. And at some point, I just looked around and I said, no one's forcing me to stay yellow. Next up is the red guy.

I can do whatever I want. Yeah. Red is terrible color. Cody is absolutely itching to change colors. He's been begging. He doesn't work well with his skin tone, in my opinion, but that's just me. But pink is having a massive comeback for both guys and girls. And I looked at square in the eye and I said, it's my pink season.

I feel like it was very much like a sports team rebranding. It's a new era. It's a new... I'm here for it. I'm still waiting on my first pink battle win, but it'll come. You'll have to wait. Might wait a while. You don't have to wait a while.

Easy, Jared. That's our two-minute warning boys where I get to rant. I've actually had one. I was watching a college basketball game the other night. And it was VCU St. Joseph. Great game, by the way. Your time is wild.

And A-10. If you're not into Atlantic 10 basketball, you should be. Good brand of basketball. But anyhow, it is more than past time to go to the sixth foul rule in the college game. There was foul trouble in that game. The two best players on, like, each team were sitting on four. You only get five in the college game before you get tossed. And I would really like to see them boosts.

Nobody goes to a basketball game saying, I hope the guys foul out tonight. You know, you hope you win. But I just feel like it's time to go to six. And then on top of that, a technical foul also is a personal foul in the college game. So if a kid gets a foul and he doesn't like the call in tech, boom, there's two right there. Garrett would know. Oh, I've gotten fouled out of a lot of games. Yeah, I've also been teched up quite a bit.

Inversely, though, one rule I'd love to see the NBA incorporate from the college game is the one-in-one. I'm fascinated by the one-in-one when you get to the seventh team foul before you get to 10, the double bonus. And I love the pressure that is, if you don't hit the front end, you don't get a second one. Sure. And it kind of I don't know, the NBA bothers me that you can have a hand check and it be the fifth foul 50 feet away from the bucket and it's a two shot penalty. I actually think all in general, the every free throw

should be one in one. One in one, unless it's shooting. Even on a shot. Oh, really? Teach you to shoot some better free throw. Oh, yeah. Because at the end of day, it's a dying art by the way. Kids are missing free throws in an alarming rate. The foul, you might have made it, but you might not of. It's a 50-50 chance that ball goes in. If you get fouled on it, it should be a 50-50 chance if you make 28% chance for me. Just based on the first. Based off analytics. I got a high.

But are you all cool with that, rant? I actually like it. I actually like it. There's a lot of, I think sports need to modernize itself. It's just like the baseball season, pitching clock. Like we got it. You got to update some rules. Yeah. Don't be for any change. Keeping it updated. I would, I would like to see, I would like to see four technicals. I'm just kidding. Three at least. Well, thank you for joining us, Corey. Always a pleasure to have Twin 2 up in the house. By the way, did that kid know he must saw the rundown? How did he know you're going to be a part of this episode?

That's insane. Incredible. Wow. Looks like our time is up. We'll be back next Wednesday with an all new app. Follow the show on all socials at Almost Athletes. Like and subscribe on YouTube or listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcast. Rate us five stars.

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