American Presidents: Totalus Rankium - 29.1 Warren Harding

Episode Date: August 8, 2020

At last we come to harding. Harding may not have stood tall in US history, but he does make a bit of a splash. In this episode we got stuck into what makes Harding an interesting, if not nice man.

Welcome to Totalus Rankium. This week, Warren Harding. Part 1. Hello, and welcome to American President Total's Rankium. I am Jamie. And I'm Rob, ranking all of the presidents from Washington to Trump, and this is episode 29.1. It's the first episode of Warren Harding. Yay! But before we start, I just need to pass on to future us who have recorded a message at the end of this episode. Thanks, past me. Yeah, I don't know if you, listener, know Harding's story, but things get a bit risqué, shall we say, saucy.

A bit oom-oom-iss-iss. Risqué, shall we say. Saucy. A bit oomis. Yeah, we like to be like a PG podcast. Yeah. PG-13 and a push. This has pushed it.

It has pushed it. No actual explicit language is used, but let's just say we are something deep in innuendo. Yeah. Yeah. Deep. To be fair, most of it is the president's own words. That is true. Yeah. Yeah. Deep. To be fair, most of it is the president's own words. That is true. Yeah.

But just to warn you, just in case, things get a bit blue at times. Yeah. I had to fan myself down at one point. Oh, my goodness. Anyway, with that, let's go back to a time where we were more innocent at the start of this episode. Let's head back to past us. Thanks, future me. Let's head back to past us. Thanks future me. Let's start. Let's do an intro, shall we? This is episode 29.1. Warren Harding. I gotta say, I love that the first few sentences of the book he posted on Twitter about Warren Harding has said, possibly one of the worst

presidents. Oh yes, yes, no, it the worst presidents. Oh, yes, yes. No, it does say that. Yeah, the biography I'm reading, the first sentence is. In fact, it's right here. I'll read it. Warren G. Harding is best known as America's worst president.

Full stop. It's a strong opening for a biography. That is. You're not building it up much there, are you? It's sort of downhill from here, sort of vibe to it. And also, I'd argue, who's he to judge? Yeah. Yeah. Surely that's

our job. Exactly. As totalus rancium hosts to judge whether he is the worst. But we'll see. Are you looking forward to this one? Yeah, I am. And I do know something about him as well. He's one of the ones on my radar. He dies. What? He dies? Yeah, at some point. When does he die? I know he

dies in office. I can't remember how. Oh, you know that? Yeah, I don't know if he gets assassinated or it's something else, but I do know that. He's one of the wrongs that rung a bell in my head. In which case, if I knew you knew, I would have changed my notes slightly. I purposely left out the fact that Coolidge is his vice president and i don't mention him at all because i knew that you knew he was a president and you put two and two together uh so yeah well i'll tell you what then to leave that part of the episode i'll pretend i don't know and we'll just remember i didn't say that magic of edit uh no it's fine it's fine that you know that he dies it's's a bit like a murder mystery where you know someone's died,

but you don't know who did it. It's cool. Yeah, you're going to be on the edge of your seat all through episode two, just waiting for something to happen. When's he going to die? Yeah, okay, fair enough. You know he dies. Right, if that's all you know about him, then believe me, you don't know the most interesting things about him.

And I'm also going to say Harding is, I'd say, one of the top three presidents I was thinking of looking forward to doing when we first started the podcast. Oh, yes. I've been waiting for this one, Jamie. Why? A lot of people put on the comments, they say, oh, do you love Harding? Why? He's not a name that stands out other than that he dies. You're going to find out, Jamie. Today? You're going to find out.

Oh, yes. Okay. Yes, you are. He doesn't marry his sister or something, does he? No, no, he doesn't. Let's start. Let's do an intro, shall we? Okay.

Let's start with a flashing light just a flashing light yeah okay start with a flashing light it's a flashing light because electric lights are still a bit useless and they flicker in it every now and again there's a man at his desk looking up at the electric light flickering away very annoyed because he's trying to write a letter he's thinking very very hard about writing this letter and um he's just sort of whispering to himself and scratching scratching his head he looks a bit confused uh sebastian no uh gerald oh gerald's not bad. No. Tom? Fred? He's just going through these names. He's looking very confused, and every time he says one, he shakes his head, slightly disappointed in himself. Bill? No. Harry? Jerry? Yes, Jerry. I've got it. And then a smile appears on his face. He looks down

and he starts to write. Warren Harding, part one. Okay. So I thought you're going into him choosing a child's name here. Is that what he's doing? No. Okay. Oh, by the way, for anyone listening who knows what I'm doing here, I apologise for being 12 years old, because, yeah, that's how immature I am. Trust me, Jamie, you're looking very confused. It will make sense, and then you'll get to join in. But we do need to go through the episode for it to make sense. Okay. need to go through the episode for it to make sense okay yeah let's let's do this then okay we are going to start with george tyron harding a good name tyron good middle not enough tyrons around anymore is there was it tyron or tyrone uh tyron spout t-y-r-o-n oh yeah i wouldn't say

that tyrone but maybe it was pronounced that way. It's pronounced with an American accent for a start. Tyrone. Yeah, there you go. That sounds a bit like Tyrone. And we do need to focus on this because no one called George George. They all called him Tyrone or Tyrone or Tyrone. Tyrone. Depending.

Yeah. And at the age of 20, Tyrone had signed up to fight for his country, joining the 96th Ohio Infantry. However, Tyrone's career as a soldier did not last long because he was sent home for medical reasons a few weeks after signing up. Oh, it was a bonus buzz. No, no, it seems real, this. Yeah, he was genuinely quite ill. He hadn't even left left the state the war hadn't really begun for

him however he spent his time recovering at home and some other activities with his wife because then he went back into the service and he did some war stuff we're not going to go into but he didn't get too much caught up in the fighting. And then his half caught up with him again, and again he was sent home for half reasons. But this was pretty good, because his young wife Phoebe was pregnant

with their first child. So he arrives home just in time. When he says their first child. Oh yeah, yeah, don't worry, don't worry. He went home, remember, for a bit. Oh, because he was injured. Because he was injured. I mean, not too injured for that, obviously.

Well, obviously not, no. An ill, not injured. Yeah. Yeah. Right, yeah. Yeah. You don't believe him, do you? No.

Sorry, sir, I need to go home. I've got an extreme case of horniness. Yeah, well, that's what happens. I need some relief. Like fowl, like son. Again, we'll get into that later. So yeah, Phoebe's pregnant, and she gives birth to their first child

in November 1865. Warren Gemmelliel Harding was born. We're going to get complaints about that name, aren't we? Oh yes, we certainly are. Gemmelliel? G-A-M-M-A-L-I-E-L. It's an old... I looked into it.

It's an old... No, no. It's an old biblical name. Oh. That's what it is. One you don't see very often anymore. No. First time I've heard of it.

There you go. So that's the G in Warren G. Harding for you. Yeah. Phoebe, the mother, had wanted to call him Winfield, but she was outvoted. Good. Possibly because that's an awful name. Yes. I apologise to all the Winfields who are listening.

Warren was the first of eight children that the family would have. So, nice big family. And when Warren was small, they moved to their own house on the harding family farm now the parents of the little boy soon realized that this little boy is quite bright uh surprisingly so he's glowing so at the age of four apparently he was so eloquent for his age that he entered into an oratory competition what yeah i couldn't find out whether this was like against grown men or whether it was just a oratory competition for four year olds in which case i'd quite like to see one of those but apparently he impressed he did very well if we can believe another story when he was five years old

he heard a bell tolling in the distance and apparently he looked up from doing something probably quite fancy and said, the bells are ringing for George Washington. Someday they will ring for me. He did not say that. He did, with that deep voice and everything. That's what he said. And then

he did a little bit of a wee and everyone clapped as it went into the potty and everything. My urination springs forth into the orange palace and everything urination springs forth into the orange palace of destiny for someday i shall too be president yeah and show wee wee in the white house yeah yeah exactly uh so there you go smart kid is what i'm trying to say uh apart from reading and talking he was also into music as well he spent a lot of time learning the cornet and singing apparently doing quite well.

Meanwhile, his parents were trying to better the family fortune. Both of them, in their spare time, studied medicine. Tyron had studied with a local doctor and then managed to get into a local medical school and graduated so he could call himself a medical doctor. So, after this, he split his time between farming and medicine until he was able to move the family to a town called Caldonia. At this point, he started a medical practice properly while Phoebe finished off her training and became a midwife. So a good medical family in the town, seen to everyone's needs.

Warren, meanwhile, carried on helping on the little farm that they had. Payment for medical help was not always in cash back then. Not everyone had cash lying around. Favours? Yeah, favours or sometimes just goods or services were exchanged. At one point Tyron was paid with an ownership

interest in a local newspaper the Caldonian Argus. So, seeing this as an opportunity for his 11 yearyear-old son, Warren was sent to the newspapers and turned into a printer's devil. What? A printer's devil.

I learnt something new this weekend. I learnt lots new this weekend. But a printer's devil is just a name for a printer's apprentice. They have a special name. I don't know why. Maybe because printer's apprentice is a hard phrase to say printer's print print printer's devil yeah devil devil be with you uh there were some theories but they're all very weak one of them being all the ink on them made them look demonic it's yeah it expensive, you don't want to waste it.

Just doing devil signs on your cheeks. Pens grabbing your forehead. Well, little Warren took to this apprenticeship like a fish to water. He was very good with words, as we've covered. He was quick and nimble, so everything that you needed to be able to set type to a deadline.

He took to it like an Atlantic harpic seal takes to viscous H2O. He said. Shut up, Warren! Yeah, the newspaper overnight just doubled in size. It was amazing. So yeah, that's what he's doing in his spare time. He's setting type and he's helping to run a newspaper. He's learning how a newspaper's put together.

But obviously he also attended school. He was a coaster. He was very much a coaster, as very many bright students are. His father later said, and I'll quote, he studied for his lessons, but I don't know when. I never caught him at it. And it used to worry me.

So I asked his teacher what Warren was doing to bring home such decent reports when he didn't do any work. Oh, he's just naturally smart, his teacher said. He's one of those pupils. Yeah, annoying. He doesn't need to do anything and they still just get through. Yeah.

Gotta love a coaster. Anyway, in 1879, Warren entered the Ohio Central College at the age of 14. Now, the family, as you've probably gathered, are hardly rolling in money, but they're not destitute either. But Warren felt he needed to get a bit of spare cash. So he spent his time painting barns and houses or helping build the railways that were being built everywhere at the time. So just doing odds and jobs to support his way through school. While studying, he enjoyed literature and philosophy most of all.

The other subjects he generally ignored completely until an exam came along and then he'd just cram for it. According to a roommate at the time, he would just rush his way through a book on the subject just before an exam. And then once it was finished, he'd jump up and shout now darn it i've got you and then slam the book against the wall and that's all he'd do for studying what a sod yeah i'm very much reminded of us at uni though oh yeah it's got to be in my 12 o'clock room it's like 11 56 and you're there printing it out three seconds to spare was my my record yeah i was pleased with that one yeah anyway uh his main source of joy during his time at college however was not studying but it was running the college newspaper that he ran with a friend called harris

now it was a college newspaper but harding and and Harris covered the whole town. Politics, jokes, local items, all sorts. And for a college newspaper, it did all right. Now, whilst he was at college, his family had moved to Marion, Ohio. It's close to where they were before, but it was almost a city rather than a rural town. Much bigger. More opportunities. Exactly. Tyrone and Phoebe were, by this point, bringing in enough money that they managed to get a, and I quote, fine house. Whatever that might mean in the centre of town. This one has walls.

Yeah, exactly. It's great. It's a door and everything. So, yeah, everything's going along quite well. And then at 17, Warren finished college and moved to Marion with his family. And what do you do when you finish college? You're normally supposed to get a job, maybe join a law firm, try and pass the bar. Well, yes, but before he does that, he's got to raise a little bit of money.

And just like we've seen before, he becomes a teacher for a while. He lasted a term before almost running out the door i'll quote next friday forever my career as a pedagogue will close hold the joy take it he didn't like you then no i think he he was asked to mark with two different colored pens and yeah and he said but how on earth does this actually help teaching and uh when no one could answer, he just left. Yeah. Because he's a stronger man than I am. Yeah, well, obviously, like you say,

there's one route that future presidents go to, and that is law. And sure enough, Warren starts to study for law. And it was as dull as it had been for almost everyone else we've covered. He hated it. But there was one thing he didn't hate. One thing he'd always loved doing ever since he was called a devil.

And that was the newspaper industry. And he heard of an opportunity. There were three newspapers in Marion. One of them was struggling. In fact, it was going under. Some irregularities had been found. And it was now technically owned by the sheriff's department. And it was being put up for auction. So Warren and a friend begged and borrowed the money until they could get $300. And with their $300, they purchased the Marion Star. There you go.

Warren and his friend now owned a failing newspaper. Hooray! Good investment. But they did... You said they were remarkably successful for a college newspaper. Oh, yeah. Warren knows what he's doing. This isn't a blind jumping in. He has, for the best part of a decade now,

been working for newspapers. So, yeah, he's still young, but he's got genuine experience in this area. So it wasn't necessarily a stupid thing to do. And not only that, it came with perks, Jamie. Perks. I like perks. Perks are good, aren't they? What are the perks?

Well, apparently, in this day and age, if you owned a newspaper, if you're a newspaper editor or a newspaper reporter, you got a free rail pass. So there you go. Overnight, Warren could now travel anywhere he wanted to the country for absolutely free, which is not to be sneezed at at all. Now, Warren was serious and young and keen. So his first act for the Marion Star was to jump on a train and head to Chicago because the GOP National Convention of 1884 was underway. Ah, the famous one. It's certainly one that we have covered,

if you remember, which obviously you do. Yeah, of course. President Arthur's in at this time. He's disliked, but he's not stepping down. Blaine from Maine and the half-breeds were running to be nominated instead. Now, the progressives of the party were disgusted by Blaine from Maine, and many of them vowed to leave the party to support the Democratic candidate Garfield. So that's where we are. A young Teddy Roosevelt was around at the time. He caused a bit of a scene, which we covered in his episode, when he decided to stick with the party despite his progressive views.

This led to his political exile, and that's when he went off west to become a cowboy. Now, Harding was very impressed with Roosevelt for sticking with the party. Someone was towing the party line, and Harding was impressed with this. And he was also very happy with the result of the convention, because Blaine was nominated. Harding liked Blaine. In fact, he wrote that he would, and I quote, put the whole weight of the star behind Blaine, which at the moment consists of him and his mate. But I'm sure Blaine would have been happy to find that out. However, when he got back home, he found that his newspaper had gone.

Oh. Always a shame when you misplace a newspaper. Factory? That's not quite a factory, is it? Printing press. Yeah, the newsroom. Yeah, no, it's all gone. Due to legal problems, irregularities from the previous owner, it was still unsure whether the newspaper could actually be sold or not. So it had been taken back by the sheriff's office. Is he just saying, can I get my $300 back then, please? Oh, I didn't

think to look into that. I'm assuming he got his $ hundred dollars back that would be a bit of a shame if he didn't would be yeah yeah so determined to make it uh as a newspaper editor this was what he wanted to do now uh harding decided to just go and get a job one of the other two papers in the in the town and he did he got a job with the democratic leaning mirror uh i mean this is great he's got a job working for a newspaper. He's being paid. But he did not like having to write with a democratic slant on things. He found it very frustrated because he was having to cover the election and he had to write things against Blaine and he didn't like doing it. So he spent his time trying to get enough support to repurchase the newspaper, the Star again. Yeah, the price was up. It was going to be harder to get.

But it was back on auction again in a few months' time. However, his friend was out this time. He didn't want anything to do with it. It was too risky. But Warren's father was doing well enough by this point that Harding was able to rebuy the newspaper in November of 1884. So there you go. He's now solely in charge and he was determined to make the paper work. For the next five to six years, the paper went from a circulation of less than 500 to a well-respected leading paper in Marion. As business picked up, Harding replaced the presses. He got a telegraph line in. He hired local regional estate reporters.

He built it from the ground up, essentially. One of the biggest business decisions was his plan to get the city's government printing jobs. Now, Harding was very proud that the star was non-partisan. It was unbiased in his mind. However, in order to get certain Republican politicians to use his printing press for governmental contracts, he needed to please said politicians. How can he please the politicians, the Republic ones, if his paper is non-bias? Gifts, flattery, box of chocolates. box of chocolates. Flattery, certainly, but in a very efficient way.

You're good. Take it or leave it. No, he set up a new newspaper, The Weekly Star. The Star remained unpartisan, but once a week, The Weekly Star would come out, all guns blazing,

fighting against the Democratic papers in the region. So the republican politicians nearby took note and started handing contracts Harding's way. Soon the contracts flooded in and he was making a decent amount of money on it. So as the paper grew, so did Harding's influence and standing in Marian society. For example, he was involved in many pushes to make the town better, including making the town an actual city. They had the population to apply to be a city at this point, and the Star was one of the papers leading the charge to get public support to turn it into a city, and it worked. He also advocated on behalf of people who wanted street lighting and paved flooring, generally modernising Marion. He also was going after the local robber barons.

Ooh, that's brave. Namely, one robber baron who happened to be the richest resident of the city, Amos Kling. Have you got an image of Amos Kling? I'm guessing big, big moustache, almost like the stereotypical fat cat kind of guy. Why not? Let's say that. We're going to get to know Kling a little bit. Harding did not like Kling. He did not like the way Kling did business, and he made it very clear in his paper. But that is not why Kling and Harding fell out so much.

The main reason for the animosity between the two men was because Harding married Kling's daughter. Oh, did he do that just to wind him up? Let's find out, because we're going to go on a little bit of a tangent and cover Florence Kling and her life up until now so we can understand the tensions that arose between Harding and Kling. So Florence was born in 1860, and she was born without a winkle.

What? Yeah, she was born without a winkle. She was a girl. Yeah, and this really annoyed Amos Kling. He was kind of counting on having, like, a child with a winkle. Kling, being that certain type of man who did not have any truck with being told something he doesn't want to hear, simply treated Florence like a boy. You wear trousers.

Not necessarily the clothing, more the actions and what she was doing. For as soon as she could walk, she was following her father around his business. Kling had made a fortune during the war and after the war in the construction trade, and now had fingers in many pies. And little Florence was being shown the ropes from an extremely early age. She was told how to act, how to do business. Generally, this will all be yours one day. You are my heir. Wow. However, by the time Florence was a teenager, she wanted desperately nothing more than to get away from this overbearing father who wanted her to be something she didn't want to be. I'm sure there were many teenage girls

back in those days who would have wished for opportunities similar to this. But all Florence wanted to do was go off and study music in New York, which was particularly popular at the time with young, wealthy females. That's what she wanted to do. She didn't want to run a construction empire. And her father was very, very overbearing. She's just standing there very sadly, holding a little tiny violin. Yeah, exactly. Arguments sprung up between father and daughter,

and in the end a compromise was come to. Florence would study piano, but in nearby Cincinnati. So Florence went off. Her time away from her father was fantastic. She enjoyed herself, but all things must come to an end. And before she could count the keys on the piano she graduated and returned home that's hyperbole if that is true i'm starting to question how she graduated amos figured that his daughter had got

the music stuff out of her system now and could get on with her job. There we go, we compromised, you went and did your stupid piano stuff. Time to learn the construction trade. But Florence was now an adult and really, really did not want to be told what to do. So a battle of wills erupted between them. Florence would storm out after rows and if she was not back before her father's curfew he would simply lock the doors and not let her back in so florence would then go and stay with a friend or perhaps a young man called pete de wolf oh that that's a that's a greasy sounding name i've heard one well peter wolf was the son of a very respected family in Marion. In fact, they lived opposite the clings.

We're talking high market here. You don't get more old money America sounding than De Wolfe, do you? They sound like they should have a bank now. Oh, they probably did. He was a year older than Florence. He was, as I say, the son of this very respected DeWolf family, but he was also known as the town drunk and an embarrassment to the very

well-respected DeWolfs. Many of Florence's friends speculated that Florence only started seeing DeWolf just to really annoy her father. And it worked. Because it really annoyed her father. But, if this isn't the reason, whatever the reason,

Florence was soon pregnant. So the two decide to run away together to Columbus in 1880. Shortly after, Florence gave birth to a boy that she called Marshall. Meanwhile, Amos, back in Marion, was beside himself with anger

and refused to have anything to do with them. Pete DeWolf soon also came to the same conclusion. Pete DeWolf had gained a reputation for being an unreliable drunk for a good reason. It's because he was an unreliable drunk. Yeah, well... Yeah. His and Florence's relationship had fallen apart

over a period of two years, and in December 1882, he simply abandoned them, leaving Florence and baby marshall with literally nothing to their names so florence was desperate she had nothing at all apart from the clothes on her back and her child so in in true fairy tale fashion on christmas eve she headed for the train station and begged for a free ride to Marion. This only worked when she used the family name. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm the daughter of Amos Clink, let me on the train. Oh, of course, madam. Yeah. First class. Goes to show, even when you've got literally nothing but your name, that's still a lot more than many people. Yeah. But still, she has only got the name at the moment.

So when she arrived on Christmas Day in her hometown, like the early, early hours of Christmas Day, she didn't know where to go. She knew what kind of welcome she'd get from her father, so she couldn't go home home. But it was too late slash early morning

to go to her friends. But she remembered that one of her friends was out of town and had an empty house, so she broke in and spent a cold night. Squat. Yes, squatting in a house with her little two-year-old. Anyway, Christmas morning dawned, and she went to another friend's place and asked for help. Her friend's father offered her a room to stay in. Meanwhile, word had spread, and friends of Florence approached Amos asking him to see reason. Come on, your daughter and your grandchild are destitute here. You can't just ignore them. Amos could just ignore them, and said so. However, Florence's mother

secretly sent Florence some money and some clothes. Oh. Anyway, time passed, and Florence started to earn some money to pay for the room that she was in by teaching piano lessons. Ah, I see. Yeah. See, her education's paying off. The DeWolf family provided some money for food, but not much. And generally, it was not the most enjoyable life

for the daughter of the richest family in the city but then amos contacted his daughter with an offer come and work for me no get rid of the child what a kind of kind of way oh dear okay you've gone from two extremes there uh somewhere in the middle i will never support you or your son, was the message. That's not an offer. No, it's more, don't worry. All right. There's a PTO in the bottom corner. P.S.

But if you give little Marshall to me and give up all rights to him, I'll raise him as a cling instead of a dwarf and he will be my heir. Ooh. Yeah, you're out, but your son can still have a life. Ooh, that's interesting. Also, just sums Amos up. He's not a nice man.

He's an absolute... Wow. Oh, yes. Yeah, we don't know how much Florence tormented over this decision. It can't have been an easy one. But in the end, she decides to give up her son to guarantee that he has a comfortable life. Meanwhile, she continued to scrape a living through piano teaching.

One of her pupils was a young woman named Charity. Charity Harding. Oh, yes. You see the stories converge. Yeah. Details are sketchy, but Florence and Warren Harding met at some point around this time and soon realised they got on very well.

So well, in fact, Florence formally divorced Pete DeWolf and the two started seeing each other openly. Amos found out and hit the roof. I mean, Pete DeWolf was a drunken and an embarrassment, but at least he was a DeWolf. Yeah. Who exactly is this young upstart newspaper editor? Who the hell is Harding?

Dr. Sons. Yeah. Hang on, I do recognise that name. That's the man who's been criticising me in the newspapers at every opportunity. Yes, he's... Is Florence doing this just to anger me yeah uh well we don't know if that was part of the reason uh it does seem that well it does seem that florence and warren did really get on but it must be said part of the

attraction for both of them does seem to be how much it would annoy Amos. Yeah, this would be hilarious. Yeah, they both shared a real dislike to Amos. And them being together, it just added a little cherry on the top to their relationship. Now, Amos wasn't only angry that his daughter was with a lonely newspaper editor. There was another reason why he was angry. Because there were rumours going around that outraged Amos. Good old-fashioned racist rumours. Because the rumour about town,

and it had been going around for quite a while, was that Harding was a word that I'm not going to use, but it was one that was used quite often then. African-American heritage, shall we say. Yeah. The rumors seem to have started a generation or two before when the Hardings moved to Ohio. They'd lived in a predominantly black area and they had got on well with their neighbors. They weren't racist, it would appear. And then, in the Civil War, the Hardings had been very openly pro-

abolitionist. Anti-slavery and quite possibly not racist. They must be black themselves, essentially, was the conclusion. This was actually a very common attack post Civil War, apparently. Racists would just claim that any white person

advocating for abolition must have black grandparents or something like that. Oh for goodness sake. Yeah. So this was the rumour with Harding. His great-grandmother was black according to Amos and Amos let it be known that he knew this to be true and it was outrageous. Incidentally, studies have looked into this. It appears it's almost certainly untrue, but then that's beside the point. Yeah, well, yeah. It was a racist brush to smear Harding with.

I doubt Amos really cared whether it was true or not. It was something he could use to attack. Yeah, that's not cool. Yeah. That's what he said. You know what, Jamie? It's not cool. It's almost what Harding said when he found out, I'll quote him,

he said he would beat the tar out of that little man, threatening Amos. Amos let it be known that he was ready for a fight. Ooh. Yeah, things are getting nasty. Heated. Florence attempted to cool things with Harding, telling him that she didn't care about these rumours, it really doesn't matter,

but Amos just didn't cease. He just kept going on about it. Typical bully. Yeah. He put his whole social weight into attempting to exile Harding from Marian society. Wow. However, the star was doing quite well by this point,

and Harding had become reasonably popular within the city. And Amos, you might have picked up on this, was a bit of a git, and many in the city were more than happy to see this rich old arse sort of stew in his own hatred and do nothing to help him. Fair enough. Amos, undeterred however, decided a different line of attack. If he can't get Harding himself, he'd go after Harding's family. Ooh.

In particular, Harding's father, Dr. Harding, Tyron. You just imagine Tyron's defence, just something along the lines of, remember, Amos, I am your doctor. I know things about you. No, that wasn't the line of defense, but that would have been good. I would have enjoyed it. Well, what Amos was doing was buying up all of the Harding family debts. So they have to pay Kling instead.

Yeah, nasty. And then he told Dr. Harding, you need to pay all those debts in full immediately or you will lose the properties. Oh, what a git. Oh, he really is a git. You weren't lying. No, I really wasn't. Tyrone Harding decided not to fight this.

He just gave up the properties. I can't fight this more than it's worth. So he just gave up on the properties. That's really annoying though for Amos. Ah, damn it. Probably, yeah. I mean, you can imagine how angry Warren is by this point. So he fought back with a move that he knew would anger Kling the most.

Marrying his daughter. Oh, yes. He proposed to Florence. In 1891, they wed. Florence's mother apparently snuck into the service at the back and then left before it ended, hoping to just see a little bit of her daughter getting wed, because obviously Amos had said no one could have anything to do with it.

So there you go, they're married. Now, as is often with relationships in the past or even the present, it's very hard to get a handle on what the relationship was like between the newlyweds. However, several historians have speculated that their mutual hatred for Amos was what bonded them more than anything else. I mean, there don't seem to be any huge spectacular falling outs or arguments, but you do get the impression,

well, I'll just carry on the story and then you'll figure it out for yourself. For instance, one thing, soon after getting married, Harding went on a trip around the country on his own. Yeah, using his free rail pass, he just went and toured the country for a bit. Now, some have pointed to the fact that Florence essentially became Warren's business partner in the newspaper. And they indicate that their relationship was more a professional one than a romantic one. But it's impossible to know, really. So, around this time, Harding started to show some health problems. Details are sketchy, but he visited Dr. Kellogg's sanitarium at least five times over a few years in this time.

So that's either emotional or some sort of mental problems. Yeah, general health spa, essentially. The sanatorium was all based around keeping the body healthy, using exercise and mainly the correct food intake. In other words, the plainer the better. Cornflakes, for example. I don't know if you've heard of Kellogg's cornflakes before. Weren't they...

Is it actually the Kellogg? Yeah, yeah, no, this is that Kellogg we're talking about here, yeah. Because wasn't he a Quaker or a Mormon? He's very religious. Yes, he was. He was a Seventh? He's very religious. Yes, he was. He was a Seventh Day. Yes, that's what he was. And cornflakes were, it might be a myth or rumour,

but they're invented to stop certain things from happening. Well, we've come across this before with the cucumbers, haven't we? Yes. Cornflakes were anti-cucumbers. They were good and dry food. Yes. Yeah. So you don't give in to the temptation.

You just furiously munch down on some dry cornflakes instead. Put your mattress with them. Yeah. Now, although cornflakes may be what made Kellogg a household name over the years, apparently he also invented the method

that was used to create peanut butter. Blending peanuts? Yeah, well, nuts, apparently, according to Kellogg, were very, very good. Nuts were going to solve all world's problems. So, yeah, peanut butter, Kellogg's cornflakes. Obviously, Kellogg's cornflakes. Yeah, these things come from Kellogg's. Now you can imagine just eating peanut butter with cornflakes in them

and how dry that would be. Had he invented Cocoa Pops while this was on? I don't think so, no. What about Frosted Flakes? They came later. Shreddies? That was probably all in the 60s for a while. He was also, Kellogg, a firm believer in having two half pints of yoghurt.

Or a pint of yoghurt. No. Two half pints of yoghurt. Or a pint of yoghurt. No. Two half pints of yoghurt because that's the only way to have them in both ends. Oh. Yeah. Oh. Half a pint up top, half a pint

down below. Sort you right out. You need something after you've munched your way through those dry cornflakes. Anyway, Harding went there, as I say, at least five occasions to recover from overstrain and fatigue. So, health problems, but it's not very clear what. Now, by this time, Harding was so popular in Marion that it became inevitable that he was going to get involved in politics at some point. His first attempt was to run for the county auditor position, a job that was a very safe Democrat seat. However, Harding didn't like the idea of it going uncontested.

So knowing that he'd lose, he put his name forward. He lost. By this time, McKinley was running for president. So Harding started to make a name for himself outside the city of Marion by campaigning on McKinley's behalf. In fact, he did so well, he was then asked to deliver further speeches up and down the whole state in support of McKinley, which he did well enough that by the end of the election

he'd received word if he ran for the ohio state the party would back him as a thank you for the hard work on the election that's good well he's a good orator as well isn't it yeah exactly now the seat he was going for was hotly contested this wasn't a shoe-in yeah but he had a decent chance to win this wasn't like before. He had the backing as well. Yeah, exactly. And it turned out he exceeded expectations. He gained four times the amount of votes

that the last Republican had. So he won the seat. He headed to Columbus to take his place on the Ohio General Assembly. He did well enough there. He used his experience as a newspaper editor. He knew how to talk a newspaper editor he knew how to talk to people he knew how to make connections and he was doing so well that when mckinley was shot and killed he was selected to eulogize the president to the state senate so yeah and then in

1901 he was made the floor leader and then renominated despite the fact there was a one-term rule they just kind of broke it for him because they thought he was doing a good job. You'll do. So yeah, just generally climbing up the old Greasy Honourum, as it were. And the climb continued. He started to make signs that perhaps he wanted to be governor one day.

Word came down from the top, no. Oh, please. Now, as we've covered, the Republican Party is undergoing a bit of a civil war with the progressive factions and the conservative factions. And Harding was seen as not progressive enough at this time. And they needed a progressive governor in Ohio. So instead, he went for lieutenant governor instead instead and he got it. But he wasn't happy about being blocked for the top job. So a year later he decided to pack in politics,

go back to being a newspaper editor. Which, by the way, the star's still ticking along in the background this whole time. There was also concern that Florence was not very well. That was another reason why he stopped politics. Her kidneys had stopped working and they were floating apparently. Above her head? Which, I mean, no one wants floating kidneys. Oh, yes. Sounds ethereal.

Yeah. Apparently they just weren't secure in her as much as they should be. Okay. That's a good point. Are they attached to anything? I thought they just sort of did... Well, apparently could like move a bit too much and block off tubes and toxins could build up sorry not good um so her kidneys were wired back in place well i'm sorry what wired in inverted commas not physical wires yeah Stainful. Yeah, sort of placed, super glued, stitched, hot glued. Who knows?

Yeah, it was tough going for her. She spent months in recovery, just confined to her bed. This was not pleasant. So Harding spent most of his time in the office running his paper, although he did make time to see some friends because Jim Phillips and his wife Carrie had been going through some hard times. Jim and Carrie had recently lost their two-year-old son, and their relationship was struggling.

So Harding suggested to his friend Jim, why don't you go and eat some cornflakes for a while in the sanatorium? Give me the world of good. Have some yoghurt. Yes, have these two half-pints glasses. Take them with you. in the sanatorium. Did me the world of good. Have some yoghurt. Yes. Have these two half-pints glasses. Take them with you. So Jim went off to the sanatorium and obviously Florence was bedridden.

Oh, no. And someone needed to console Carrie. Just to show her it's a crown, right? Of course, of course. Yeah, they were totally doing it. Yeah. Yeah. This is not speculation no okay

because there were letters jamie the letters oh there were letters and this this is the reason everyone's been looking forward to this episode uh and this is the reason for the opening all right give me a second let me take a swig you do that, let me give you a bit of background. These letters were found in a closet in the late 50s, early 60s. Oh, so quite late then. Oh yeah, a judge read them and sealed them until 2014. Oh, so there's only recently been sort of... Post the biography that I read.

In fact, I'll quote from the biography I read to get most of the information for this episode from. The letters remain sealed until 2014. Much of their content is known. However, little of that content is relevant to anything other than a love affair that ended unhappily for both lovers. Oh.

Dismisses them. There's nothing really in the letters. We know most of it. Go on. Then the letters were released. We're not pushing over them like that, because we are post-2014, and we know the details. There were 106 letters to carry that survived.

They range from romantic to explicit, albeit in a very weak code. Just going to warn our listeners now, things do get a bit saucy, shall we say. You've got to use your sexiest voice then, Rob. Well, let's go over some of the most fun things that President Harding said to his mistress. But before we start, let's see if you can spot the code word that he used for his, um, you know. Oh, no.

Oh, yeah. And I quote, Jerry. You spotted it, yeah. I'll continue. You recall, Jerry, whose cards I once sent you to Europe. You recall Jerry, whose cards I once sent you to Europe? Jerry came in whilst I was pondering your notes in glad reflection, and we talked about it. He was strongly interested and elated and clung to discussion.

He told me to say that you are the best and darlingest in the world and if he could have but one wish it would be to be held in your darling embrace and be thrilled by your pink lips. Oh. Oh. I think we need a rating for this episode.

Oh my goodness. That's fifth. There's more. Oh brilliant. I'll do a couple more Jerrys. Yeah. Jerry sends his Christmas greetings. He would come too. If I might, would he be welcomed?

He said in one letter. In another one. Jerry came and will not go. He says he loves you. You must not be annoyed. He is utterly devoted that he only exists to give you all. I fear you would find a fierce enthusiast today. The last Jerry one, it's shorter.

I wish I could take you to Mount Jerry. Wonderful spot. That's quite clever, actually. I like that. So there you go. I've introduced you to Jerry. I don't quite know what to say, to be honest. I have been resisting the urge to gently make fun of Jerry

from the Presidency's podcast all week, only because it would give the game away to you. Well, the cuffs are off now. Oh, yes, they are. Sorry in advance, Gerry. Is it Gerry with a G or Gerry with a J? With a J. Ah. Yeah.

But it wasn't just Gerry that Harding wrote about. Oh. Guess who Mrs. Poulterson is. Or rather, what? When I saw Mrs. Poulterson is? Or rather, what? When I saw Mrs. Poulterson a month ago, she persuaded me that you still loved. I had a really happy day with her. Yeah, sometimes the code was obviously a bit confusing, however,

and needed some clarification. Right. Wouldn't you like to get sopping wet out on Superior? Dash. Not the lake. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Oh my god. Oh.

Oh. I did warn you. I did warn you. Yeah. Oh, this is filth. Oh yeah, it really is. And we're going there. And then finally, finally, my favourite, perhaps, of all of them. There's no innuendo here.

It's just a sign that sometimes these letters back and forth got a little bit confusing and they needed clarification. These letters back and forth got a little bit confusing and they needed clarification. If I have interpreted correctly, you do not wish me to bring the missus to Ohio? Obviously him clarifying that next time he goes to see Carrie, he's not supposed to bring Florence. Just to make sure. That'd make things a lot easier.

Yeah, unfortunately we don't have Carrie's letters, so we don't know what nickname she had for anything. I'm just really hoping her letters are very, almost quite... Would you stop sending me these letters? I don't know who you are. Are we calling the police? Quite possibly. Yeah, there we go.

You've met Jerry now. Meanwhile, back home, Amos had started to reconcile with his daughter. Her brush with death recently had obviously brought them closer together. And also, Amos was in a good mood. He was in his 70s by this point and just married a woman 38 years his junior. So he was in a good mood. So he decides to make up with the Hardings. He very racedly said, for example, about Harding,

he's a bleep, but he's a smart bleep. Again, not saying that word. Yeah, Amos is an awful human being. But he's now kind of on board with the family. He even paid for a recovered Florence and Warren to go on Europe for a six-week holiday. Now, I tried to find out whether this was one that Jim and Carrie went on with them. I'm not sure if this one was, but they did go to Europe on holidays together as a foursome.

Did Jerry go along? Jerry periodically popped in. Just say hello. Hi. Anyway, after a while, Harding was getting dragged back into politics. However, the Republican Party wanted him to run for governor. Harding was at this time seen as a good compromise between the warring progressives and conservative factions. So he's more of a moderate. Yeah. However, due to the war in the party, the Democrats were looking stronger, and Harding failed to be elected. So that didn't work. Harding became

more and more disillusioned with the party due to this faction war. He believed the progressive faction were to blame. They were just a cultish following of Roosevelt, and Roosevelt was just using it because he lusted for power. During the National Convention shortly afterwards, Harding was a folly behind Taft. It was the only

way to keep the Republicans on the straight and narrow. They needed to get away from Roosevelt's megalomania. Harding himself delivered a speech in the convention to nominate Taft. As you can see, his standing in the Republican Party has gone up. But as we've seen, despite the fact Taft winning the nomination, this led to a split in the Republican Party when Roosevelt just left and set up the Progressive Party. And then Taft lost the election

badly. So Harding retreated to his newspaper once more to sparing the Republicans. It was about this time that his and Carrie's affair was discovered by Florence. Who is this Jerry you're talking about all the time? I wouldn't surprise me. The only Jerry I know is, oh my goodness!

Yeah, we have few details exactly how this came about, but there are rumours that Carrie wanted Harding to leave Florence and run away with her, but he refused. Another story I came across was they were simply caught. But either way, it was decided that Carrie and her husband were going to go and live in Germany for a while, and Florence and Warren would work on their marriage for a bit. Yeah, fair enough.

Yeah. Meanwhile, he was determined to get back into politics, he decided. He's yo-yoing in and out of politics, but... Well, he's got nothing to do now, literally. Well, exactly. So he called in a favour. He asked for a governmental position just to get his feet wet once more. Maybe the ambassador to Japan.

He'd heard that was open. And Taft really liked him. He'd been the man to stand up and give the speech to nominate him. Taft, by the way, is still in power at this point. He's just been elected out. Taft, however, had to inform his supporter that Japan was taken. Sorry. Maybe something else will come up before the end of my term, he said.

It didn't. No. However, in 1914, a senator named Burton announced he was stepping down. Some of Harding's friends told him that this was his chance. Now, Harding was unsure. He didn't really want to go into the Senate. He was looking for more of an administrative role. Or maybe it was less to do with the idea of running in the Senate, more the idea of literally running for the Senate, because Ohio had just accepted primaries for the election of senators. And due to the mess of the Republican Party, this essentially meant that the progressive and the conservative Republicans would be up against each other, vying for votes, something that Harding did not like the idea of. He was all for party unity.

But in the end, he was persuaded, partly by his friend Doherty, partly by Florence, something that Harding did not like the idea of. He was all for party unity. But in the end, he was persuaded, partly by his friend Doherty, partly by Florence, partly by the retiring Senator Burton. A lot of people were telling him he should go for this. So in the end, he did, and he did very well. He campaigned with the message that the Democrats were the enemy, the Republicans should pull together and stop fighting ourselves.

Gets a good message, I'd say. Well, yeah, it worked. It was strong enough that he won the seat. Warren entered the Senate. And as we've seen with many that we've covered, as soon as you enter the Senate, you stop doing anything interesting at all. Yeah, yeah.

There is nothing much to report on during his time as a senator. He was a lowly senator. He made little waves. He was on some committees. He got on with the job. As usual with Harding, it's his personal life that's far more interesting, because it's around this time that he met the 20-year-old Nan Britton. Ah, Nan. Now, to be fair, he'd actually met Nan Britton before, but probably didn't pay her much attention, or at least hopefully, because she was the daughter of a friend and also the pupil of his sister, who was a schoolteacher.

Oh! According to Nan Britton, she had been infatuated with Harding as a girl, so much so that her father had told Harding, presumably finding it amusing. He's over-ra either raised, oh really? Really. Your daughter's infatuated with me. I'm confused if she's turned to a new friend. If she likes me, she'll love Jerry.

Yeah, apparently soon afterwards, Harding arranged a meeting. By 1917, they were having a full-blown affair. By the way, Carrie had found living in Germany was a bit unstable at this time. I suppose it would be, yeah. Yeah, so she'd come back. So there's a very good chance that they'd started up their affair once more. They certainly met a few times. But back to Nan Britton, because within a couple of years of the affair with Nan

Britton, she gave birth to a daughter called Elizabeth. Oh. Oh yes. We don't have all the details, but Nan claimed that Harding never saw his daughter, but promised to support her and the child, and then they continued the affair. Yep. Incidentally, by the way, after Harding's death, which you now know about, is during his presidency, Nan Britton wrote a book about the affair shortly afterwards. Right. Made it all public. This affair continues throughout their presidency. There's bits in it about them doing it in the stock cupboard in the White House. Wow. Yeah. The book, as I say, goes into details and obviously was popular in certain areas, but many accused her of being perverted and deranged. Yeah,

of course. Historians almost all agreed that Nan's story was full of holes, very unlikely to be true. Now, this wasn't just at the time. This is for the last hundred years. Right. Her story is clearly just made up. The affair with Carrie, yes, but there's just so many inconsistencies. It's sensationalist. This was an opportunist trying to make money.

In fact, Nan Britton ended up retreating from interviews because she was just treated so appallingly. She refused to talk about it after a while. She died, get ready for this, in 1991. Whoa! Yeah, she was 94 when she died. That is insane. Yeah.

And then, in 2015, only five years ago, a DNA test was finally conducted from someone who was willing in the Harding family and the grandchild of Nan Britton. Turns out she was telling the truth. Oh. Oh, yes. Yeah.

So even the biography that I read for this, which was published six years ago, one year before the DNA test, spends two pages saying, no, this seems very unlikely. But then to be fair to it just say in a footnote however

there is living relatives if we get a DNA test we can sort this out no problem and yeah they did so yeah there you go awkward that happened yeah anyway going back to Harding's time though Harding has

his two mistresses quite possibly at the same time a love child he refuses to acknowledge, and his wife and a cushy job in the Senate. I'm liking him less and less. So when he talks about being a bad president, is this more of a moral badness rather than a... No. Oh, OK. There's more. Oh, okay. There's more. Oh, there's more. Yeah, he ticks all the boxes.

He really does. Splendid. Although what I will say, unlike Cleveland, he didn't try and put Nan Britton in an insane asylum. That is true. That's always a positive. And apparently he was paying for the child

he didn't want anything to do with the child but was giving money to nan so i i mean don't get me wrong awful yeah but we've seen worse yeah unfortunately yeah um anyway like i say he's living what he probably considers the good life. But it wasn't enough for him, because he had decided that he was going to go for the top job. Really? Yes. I mean, he's a promising politician from Ohio, and I don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of presidents have come from Ohio of late.

Ohio was what Virginia had been at the start of the country. There were various factors why Ohio had produced so many presidents. The main one being that... Taft. Sorry. Yeah, Taft was from Ohio. Yeah, yeah. McKinley was from Ohio. Roosevelt was from New York.

Wilson was from Virginia. Yeah, that's interesting. I'll let you know, shall I? Because if we look at the American birth map that I created at the start of the series, which I'll put up on Twitter and Facebook so people can look at it and be remembered of it, it's got all their births. So I'll just pull that up.

Seven presidents have come from Ohio. Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Harrison, McKinley, Taft and Harding is the last one. They got no more after that. That's almost a third of the presidents so far. A quarter. Yeah, yeah. Only Virginia has produced more presidents. Yeah, and obviously, as Ohio has produced so many presidents,

people have come to expect presidents to come from Ohio. So if a politician is doing well in Ohio, people start paying attention to them, thinking, is this the next president? They also have ties to past presidents that can maybe open a few doors because they all grew up in the same region. So it's sort of self-fulfilling Ohio breeding presidents. So, yeah, because he's doing well and he's from Ohio, there is a decent job. He could get it.

So he starts thinking about it. Now, in order to get the top job, he'd have to go after President Wilson, who had just come back from the peace talks. Oh yeah, a world war's happened, by the way. Oh yes, yes. A short version of that. Wilson was pushing for the US to enter the League of Nations,

as we covered last time. Harding would push against this. That's how he'd make his name. He delivered 10,000-word speech against joining the League of Nations in the Senate. That's like doing a podcast episode, isn't it? Yeah, not far off. 12,000 words is usually the two episodes together. Anyway, the speech went down very well.

His message that the Republic was a fragile thing not to be messed with by giving up powers rang true to many. In fact, I'll quote him, No Republic has permanently survived. They have flashed, illuminated, and advanced the world, and then faded and crumbled. He then went on to essentially say

it's the duty of every American to fight for the independence of their republic. Right. We can't be merging our powers by joining a league. It would be the death of us. Now, as we've seen, Wilson having a stroke pretty much put an end to the campaign for the United States to join the league. And Harding, being one of the most prominent Republicans opposing the president,

was seen as being on the winning team. This did him good. And shortly afterwards he publicly announced he was running for president. So Harding and those around him had a plan. Harding was not the most popular Republican running, far from it. At least nine other men were in the running, and by far the two most popular were General Wood and Frank Loden. Now, we've come across General Wood before in Roosevelt's episode. If you remember, Roosevelt refused to take command of the Rough Riders to begin with. So the command was given to a friend instead, and he was second in command.

Well, that was Wood. Many saw Wood, obviously, as the natural successor to Roosevelt. Roosevelt's died recently by the way yeah so let's get wood how was it like attack by mountain lion or something I think I think stampede I think someone shot him with an elephant gun and then a mountain lion savaged him and then he fell off Niagara Falls and then after he'd recovered I don't know the moon landed on him yeah yeah a bit of a headache then we'll go into it in his promised third episode at the end of the series uh but yeah he's dead he died recently so the

republicans were looking for a successor to Roosevelt, especially the progressives, and they saw Wood as that natural successor. He was a rough rider also. Lowden, the other forerunner, was in the pockets of big business. In fact, he was big business himself. He was married to the heir of the Pullman fortune. Remember, we've covered Pullman before. Yeah, he had strikes. He made the Pullman

carriages. Yeah, big robber baron. Anyway, obviously, you've got Loden and the big business, and you've got Wood and the progressives. One of them's surely going to win. But the plan for Harding was simple. Run as a dark horse candidate. Let Wooden Loden fight this out, and then just sweep in at the end. We've seen it before. However, slight problem, primaries were now a thing in 16 states. It's not the most important section of the nomination, but they were before the convention, so they were kind of seen as a way of shoring up support before the actual voting in the convention. Yeah. Ohio was going first.

Now, Harding ran a campaign based on Americanism. Americanism was a nice vague word, but it sounded good, didn't it? What was Americanism? I hear you ask. Yeah. It's like saying, be more British. More awkward and drink tea. Well, when one Republican was asked, what is Americanism?

He replied, damned if I know, but you'll find it a damn good issue to get votes in the election. So blind patriotism, essentially. Oh, yes, you will recognise this approach. We've seen it before on the podcast, and we've seen it in real life really quite recently. If you've got little to actually say, just keep saying words like America and patriot and freedom.

Yeah. In fact, I'll quote part of one of Harding's speeches at the time here. We must make sure our own house is in order before we attempt the miracle of old world stabilisation. To safeguard America first. To stabilise America first. To safeguard America first. To stabilize America first. To prosper America first. To think of America first. To exalt America first. To live for and revere America first. If you say the word America that many times in a speech, you're going to get a lot of cheers.

You are, yeah, yeah, you are. Yeah. And not many people will stop and actually think this doesn't actually mean anything what was he saying is that american yay as opposed to all those times where we've been what making laws in europe first what yeah um anyway he was bitterly disappointed therefore after all these uh rousing speeches, when he won Ohio, but only by the skin of his teeth. Now, he was from Ohio. He should comfortably win there.

Could he really do this? He started to have doubts. He then lost Indiana and was utterly crushed in Montana. Really? Yeah. Now, he wasn't running in any state that Loudoun or Wood was because he didn't want to anger any of their supporters. Yeah. His whole plan

rested on the fact that Loudoun or Wood supporters would eventually support him. Yeah. So he was staying away from those primaries. So in theory, he should be able to win the primaries he was in fairly easily. He wasn't going against the two big names. Yeah, but he couldn't win them. He phoned his campaign manager, the aforementioned Doherty,

and told him that he was going to give in. He was going to run for the Senate again. Florence heard this and angrily took the phone from her husband and told Doherty that this was simply not true. Harding would be in the race still. You'll see, you'll see. Probably thinking, I'm not putting up with being married

to a womanising git and then not becoming first lady. Yeah. Anyway, he needed not to have despaired too much. I mean, the plan was always to be the dark horse. They didn't need to win any of these primaries. From the start, Harding and Doherty had been contacting people and getting them to promise that he was their second choice.

All he needed to do was not annoy anyone too much and look like a good compromise and then wait for the deadlock between Wood and Loden and he'd get it. So come the convention, Harding had to decide whether he was going to attend personally. Now, ever since Roosevelt, there had been a shift in the Republican conventions. It was now seen as acceptable that the nominee, hopeful, actually showed up and looked like he wanted the position. Fair enough. Slowly, someone in the back of the convention hall sadly did a reverse high five. The Roman ethos was dead. Oh, it's gone.

It's going, yeah. Because Harding decided to go, everyone else was going, all the forerunners were going, so he was going to go as well. Harding's plan to be a dark horse, by the way, wasn't a secret at all. It was fairly obvious what he was doing. Doherty himself predicted what would happen right at the start of the convention, and I'll quote, himself predicted what would happen right at the start of the convention, and I'll quote, I don't expect Senator Harding to be nominated on the first, second, or third ballots, but I think we can afford to take chances that about 11 minutes after two Friday morning of the convention,

when 15 or 12 weary men are sitting around a table, someone will say, who will we nominate? And at that decisive time, the friends of Harding will suggest him, and we can well afford to abide by the result. Now, this off-the-cuff remark from the campaign manager led to people later talking about sinister deals and smoky rooms. How did he know that was going to happen? It's because that's what always happens. Well, yeah, the shocking thing, of course, is not that this is what happened,

but the fact that there were some people who didn't realise that this was the norm. This is what happened in every convention. But people have become so used to it in the convention, people have stopped hiding it now. It's just, yeah, this is how it's done. We have chats in smoky rooms and we decide who we're going to flip our votes to. Doherty's prediction was almost spot on. After eight rounds of voting on Saturday, not Friday, everyone realised that the

deadlock between Wood and Lowden was insurmountable. So after some chats in some smoky rooms, Lowden's supporters flipped. They offered their support to Harding simply to stop Wood from getting the vote. Harding was the nominee. He went immediately into campaign mode. He was up against... Can you remember who he was up against? Wilson. No, Wilson's...

Wilson wanted to run again, but he'd had a stroke and he was politely and firmly told no. No, I can't remember. Cox. Oh, yeah. Oh, dear. A relatively unknown governor. Harding decided that he would emulate the McKinley election. Remember, he'd helped McKinley's election back in the day,

and he really respected McKinley's election. Now, if you've forgotten, McKinley ran what was known as a front porch campaign. Rather than extensive touring, Harding was going to sit on his recently renovated front porch and let people come to him. The lazy man's approach to campaigning. He spent the summer writing speeches and delivering them on his front porch, writing them himself. Incidentally, he is the last president recorded to write his own speeches. That's interesting. Various groups turned up to talk to him, groups from many walks of life, sports clubs, women's movements, governors. Even some people

came from the West Coast, California, a place called Hollywood that had recently joined with Los Angeles. Hollywood. Yeah. We are three years away, by the way, from the famous Hollywoodland sign going up. Oh, really? Oh, cool. Yeah. I don't know if you know the origins of that sign.

Hollywoodland was an advert for a housing development in the area called Hollywoodland. And it went up. It was not meant to be permanent it was just an advert for the housing development it became very run down it was oh this is off the top of my head it's not in my notes but if I remember correctly in the 40s they took the land part down renovated it so it just said hollywood to stand for the area rather than the just the housing development but yeah if you you look up pictures for hollywood land sign you can see how it looked originally and then look up the hollywood sign in the 70s and look how dilapidated it had become by

that point one of the o's had disappeared and one of the other O's looked like a U and it was all falling apart. I went through a strange rabbit hole here. But yeah, Hollywood's a thing is what I'm trying to say. Only just starting. But yeah, they turned up. Anyway, Harding carried on giving his speeches. Although some criticise Harding's lack of substance. One reporter described a speech,

It reminds me of a string of wet sponges. Nice. Which is fantastic. Yeah. However, Harding was helped by a very positive press. Having worked in the newspaper industry for most of his life, he was able to please the reporters who came to see him. They were more than happy to endorse this man who, for example, refused to catch a train that was waiting for him

because he insisted that these hard-working reporters could get a quote. Oh yeah, he even built the reporters a bungalow in his garden so they could go somewhere to rest whilst they were covering him. So as you can imagine the reporters were quite happy with him and happy to give him good press. There were a couple of issues, though. The first was an attack on Harding personally. That's right, it's the same old racist attack that Amos had used.

Yeah. Many in the Democratic Party attempted to spread the word that the presidential nominee was actually secretly a black man, just very well disguised. However, these were unofficial tactics. Cox and Harding's campaigns officially refused to acknowledge the rumours. They wanted nothing to do with it, although there was some rumour that Cox was secretly encouraging it. More than likely. The ignore tactic worked. And with the Cox campaign not willing to openly, overtly be racist at least, the story just died a death.

The other problem, however, was Jerry. Oh. Landry or Harding's penis. Which one are we talking about now? So sorry, Jerry. No, no, the penis, which one are we talking about now? So sorry, Jerry. No, no, the penis, Jerry. Or rather, I should say,

Carrie Phillips. The fact that she still had all of the letters. Oh, right. Harding realised that it might be a problem that Carrie had hundreds of letters from him talking about Jerry. Yeah.

So, in a meeting that I really really really wish I was a fly on the wall for, he went to see certain people high up in the Republican Party. They obviously had a meeting. Right, any skeletons in the cupboard we need to be aware of before we start this

campaign, Harding? Well, maybe one. And it's a biggie. It's all very shady. We don't get all the details, but it would appear someone in the Republican Party approached Carrie and her husband and asked what it would take for them to just make sure this all goes away. The reply came, how about a tour of Asia and the Pacific Islands and then an annual payment for the rest of our lives?

Of course. Was the reply, yes. Let's hope we get a nice, strong, sturdy boat for you for your cruise. Well, I mean, the cruise straight away. Let's get you out of the country. And the annual payments to keep you sweet whilst Harding's president. So that's how we're starting this with bribe money. Oh, yes.

Anyway, the campaign continued and the advancements in technology made it easier for the Harding campaign to get their message across the land. Photographs and voice recordings were used extensively, billboards, newspaper adverts, even telephone calls, and motion pictures. Yeah. These weren't talkies, though, in this time, were they?

They would have been... No, but a waving Harding, perhaps. Yeah. With his arm around his mate, Jerry. Ooh. Oh, they had to pay to get rid of that one as well. Yeah. So, on November the 2nd,

1920, and if you were writing extensive notes, you'll remember that this is his birthday, incidentally, his 55th birthday. It was election day. Florence became the first wife to vote for her husband to become president. Because obviously women can help out. Of course. Now, if Harding had any worries, he need not have had the worries. He, sorry, I'm looking at my notes and honestly,

when I wrote this sentence, I thought nothing of it. He utterly destroyed Carks. He utterly destroyed Cox. 60% of the popular vote to 34%. That is 404 electoral college votes to 127. Wow, that is a... Yeah, if you look at the map, it is only, like, the South, as in the Civil War South, that voted for Cox. Literally the rest of the country, which is pretty much filled in by this point,

states-wise, all went for Harding. So there you go. Vague promises of being patriotically American had won the day, and America were going to find out whether this man with just vague notions of being American would be a good president. Let's see, shall we?

So there you go. That's part one. Oh, that was, yeah, that was actually quite interesting. He's an interesting guy. Not a nice guy. No, he's not a nice guy. He's unpleasant in a different way to Wilson. Yes.

But Wilson was incredibly dull. At least Harding's not dull. Yeah. I wouldn't necessarily want to be his friend, but he makes for a far more interesting president to research. That's for damn sure. Yes. So, predictions for his presidency,

apart from the fact you know he dies? Obviously not very good, I'm guessing. Do you know how long he lasts? No. I won't get your hopes up. It's not amusingly short. I was going to say, I've got a little special surprise for you at the end of the episode, Rob.

Oh, OK. This is coming from nowhere. What's this? I've got a game to play. A game to play? With you, yeah. You're going to play a game with me. I'm suddenly very scared.

Oh, you don't have to be that scared. Right. What I've got are some famous quotations from presidents we either covered or they're quite well known you've got to guess the president oh don't do this i'm not going to be able to do this i think somebody some you're able to get some you're able to get there's you've got a total of six to get right got him got him this is number one yeah yeah change will not come if we wait for some other person or if we wait for some other time.

Who said that? I'll give you a clue. It's more of a modern president. Not one we've covered. No. Oh, right. If it's not one we've covered, that could well be Obama. You are correct.

One point to you. Oh, yes. One point to me. This one. I don't know if this one's accurate, but apparently it's for this president. Where are you getting this from? Is it the back of a crisp packet or something? 99% of failures come from people who make excuses.

This is a president we have covered. An ambitious president, I'll give you that. The one we've covered who was ambitious. Someone who had no truck with failure. That could be many of them. That could be Lincoln. It was our first president. It was Mr George Washington.

Oh, you see, I was thinking either Washington or Lincoln, but I went for Lincoln just being really annoyed by all the generals refusing to fight the war. Yeah, that's fair uh right this one this is another president we have covered any man worth his salt will stick up for what he believes right but it takes a slightly better man to acknowledge instantly and without reservation that he is in error well i i'm assuming the cocking of the gun is is in the quote because that's what he was doing at the time.

But I feel it gives the game away. I'm guessing that's Jackson. Yeah, it's Andrew Jackson. Sorry, I asked. Yeah. Right, here we go. This is an easy point. Ask not what your country can do for you,

but what you can do for your country. Easy one. Trump? Was that Trump? He said something like that recently. No, that would be JFK. That's JFK. Right, next one.

It is hard to fail, but it is worse than ever to have tried to succeed. Covered or not. Yeah, we've covered this one. That's very generic. That could literally be anyone. I'm going to go for, though, because these have all been famous presidents you're quoting so far, so it's not going to be like a haze,

because also the word splendid's not in there So it's not going to be like a haze. No. Because also the word splendid's not in there. It's not going to be Hulk, although that would suit Hulk really well. Because it's the kind of smug thing he'd say after taking off his list. I'm going to say Roosevelt. Which one? We've only covered one. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, no, you got that.

You got that right. Well done. Yes. All right, last's true. Yeah, no, you got that right. Well done. Yes. Right, last one. I never understood wind. You know. I know windmills very much. They're noisy.

They kill birds. You want to see a bird graveyard? Go under a windmill someday. You'll see more birds than you've ever seen in your life. Which president, which leader of the free world do you think said that? I believe that was the wise words of the other Roosevelt. Franklin? Franklin Roosevelt? Yes, yes, it was.

Excellent. I'm really glad I got that. Well, thank you for that game. That's all right. But you got a five out of six. That's pretty impressive. You did quite well. That's not bad.

Not bad. Okay. That was fun. Good. I didn't do as bad as I feared I would. Right. Okay. Well, on that note, I will say next time we get to see what Harding was up to in the White House.

Apart from what we already know he was up to in the White House. Yes. Thank you very much for listening. Download us all in all the places. Please leave a review. Leave a review somewhere. Telling us how much you enjoyed the adventures of Jerry. And until next time.

Goodbye. Goodbye. Oh, Warren, how are you doing? Wonderful, old fellow. Just writing a note to the old mistress, you know. Oh, to Carrie. Oh, how is she? She's fine. Shall I send you regards, Jerry? Oh, that'd be fantastic. I haven't seen her in a long time. At least a month, I think. Yes, what would you like me to say to her?

I'd just say I'd love to meet up with her again really soon. Yes, okay, I'll write that down. Jerry is very excited. Shall I put excited? I think excited, yes. Excited to see you again, Carrie. I mean, look at me. It's like being back in the army.

I'm just standing to attention. He is standing to attention. Oh, oh, please, please. I'd love to meet her again. I would weep for joy if I got to see her again. He is weeping for joy. Anything else? I'm struggling almost to contain myself.

He is struggling to contain himself. Almost ready to explode. Explode. In fact, scratch all that. Tell it to come round to my house so I can show it my new billiard table. Playing with balls. Dying for you to handle them. Excellent. I think I've covered everything you wanted to say, Jerry. Oh, splendid.

Anything else at the end? Well, actually, if we could arrange a quick... Cherry's going on a cruise.