Artist Friendly with Joel Madden - Eyedress (Rerun)

Episode Date: August 12, 2026

On this week's rerun episode of Artist Friendly, Joel Madden is joined by Eyedress. Born in Manila, Eyedress came to the US at five years old, moving through Arizona and California — discovering punk and skate culture along the way — before his family returned to the Philippines when he was 15. After years of self-releasing lo-fi bedroom recordings and slowly building an online following, he broke through with 2020's Let's Skip to the Wedding, which spawned global hits "Jealous" and "Romantic Lover" and eventually led to a deal with RCA. Since then, he's collaborated with artists like Mac DeMarco, King Krule, and Harmony Korine, carving out a sound that's equal parts woozy, nostalgic, and entirely his own. Eyedress and Joel dig into his journey from a rough childhood to building a life and family on his own terms, the anxiety that still follows him even after years of success, and why he believes the biggest leap of faith he ever took was also the best decision he ever made. (0:03) – From Manila to the World Stage(1:17) – Social Media: Real Life vs Curation(2:41) – Meeting Elvia (3:29) – Making Music Without Asking Permission(5:41) – Childhood(6:23) – No Choice But to Grow Up(7:44) – A Fear That Kept Him in Line(12:57) – What You Don't See on Social Media(14:32) – Success Without Buying In(17:38) – Culture Shock(20:51) – The Wake-Up Call(21:43) – 10 Years of Work Before Anyone Noticed(22:13) – First Deal(25:54) – A Father Who Always Believed(30:09) – Battling Doubt, Fear, and Anxiety(31:00) – Imagination as Blessing and Curse(37:19) – Skateboarding to Quiet the Mind(41:00) – Family Over Everything(43:28) – Forgiveness(52:19) – How Skate Culture Shaped His Sound(54:34) – Music as an Escape Route(56:52) – From Nothing to Everything He Dreamed Of(58:37) – Leap of Faith Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, what's up everybody? It's Joel Madden and this is artist friendly from Alternative Press. On today's episode, I'm talking to Idris. What's up, Idris? What's up, man? I'm really happy you're here. We've never actually really gotten to like sit down for a long period of time and like talk. Here we are.

But you're in with like the brothers and. Josh and Ben. Yeah, we'll run into each other every now and then. Yeah. But I'm a huge fan of your music, obviously. Likewise. And I don't know where to start. If we start present or we go past, because I really, I don't know your whole story,

but I know enough of it to know, like, it's probably one of the more interesting stories in music. it's it is what it is man yeah it's um i don't know where should we start um i think so one of the things i love about you is your family you're like this amazing dad love him amazing partner you put your family first and it's almost like it's like this part of you that like you're one of the only artists that I feel like I see that shares their real life with people. Yeah. But it's natural. It happened naturally.

I mean, the timing of it was literally around the time like my music was getting discovered. And at the time I had, we had a son and, you know, I wasn't about to like hide it or anything. And I was so proud of it. So I was like, this is a good thing. And so it just became natural that I was just sharing what I always, you know, it's what I love. Yeah. So I don't know, man. That's how the family is just, you know, that's why they're in the picture.

They're in all the videos. And yeah. Yeah, you can feel it. You feel like the thing I see sometimes, even me, like, you know, like we don't ever plan. Like, you don't have this master plan. I feel like anyways for me, I didn't have a master plan of how I was going to have a family. it just happened. You fall in love with someone, and then all of a sudden, oh, you got the kid,

and then you're building a family. And it does save your life. Yeah, like, I mean, I wasn't like a perfect person before I met LVSA. So I think meeting her, like, at that time was just like perfect timing. Like, you know, I could have had all this, all these bad things happened to me. But she was like, oh, just stay home with me. And, you know, let's have a family. It's not like be out there.

Keeps you out of the streets. Yeah, you know, you don't get caught up in no drama. So I thought that was nice because when, you know, when I first moved here, I was like, oh, it's crazy out here. So I was just like, you know, I don't really know if that's what I want. Like my life was already crazy. So when I got here, I was like, I want quiet. Like, not the party LA life. But is it possible that like that like, that like.

part of like it's interesting right because like you're you're an incredible artist you make really great art a lot of people connect with it it also feels different from everything else it feels like again like i'm always looking for artists that feel like they don't they're not trapped in the in the box they're not trapped in the way that everyone else has to do everything they're not like they're not subscribed to anyone else they're just doing their thing you're just making making. If you were a painter, you would just be in your studio painting and not looking outwards at what everyone else is painting. That's how I feel about your music. I feel like you make your music, you don't ask for permission. You're not checking in with the mass of people

going, hey, what do you want to hear? Or you're not following any trends. Yeah. And you're doing it. And I'm trendy. But, you know, I'm like, I just make what I like. And I think I just pay homage to all those things that I'm obsessed with. And every day or week, you know, maybe not every week or every day. But, you know, every now and then I'll find some new stuff to get obsessed with. And then I just kind of soak it up. And I need to hear everything that I'm into at the time. And I need to watch everything.

And but yeah, you know, and then I'm a gem. and I so it gets old but it doesn't mean that you know like all my albums like I don't I don't know I don't listen to them anymore right you're waiting for your next one yeah I'm just like making your new shit I'm always looking at the next thing and that's what's exciting about living really it's just like what haven't I covered yeah and uh yeah it's like today and I'm just trying everything you know like trying to soak everything up like a sponge living in America is like a privilege for me so I'm you know I don't want to waste any time so you came to L.A. from Arizona from the Philippines oh so you were in the Philippines yeah before that I was in um I was back here I was in San

Klamini oh wow and then before that I was in Arizona so how did you end up back in the Philippines because I know you were born in the Philippines yeah well my dad yeah i was born in the philippines he got drafted by like 20th century fox and i was like five or six so that you know got us to move to arizona okay and then in arizona it was just rough what was that like what was it like being how old were you when you moved to arizona it was like five or six and what was that like i had to learn english within a year and i just had to get on my feet you know because it wasn't like, I didn't live in a safe neighborhood. So, you know, you'd walk down the wrong street and then you get chased by a bunch of kids

and they jump you. And then, yeah, I just, I had to grow up, like, kind of, I don't know, I just had to be aware of my surroundings. Pretty fast. There was a lot of, like, gangs around. And I was just, like, this Filipino kid, like, just like, I was happy to be out of the slums and be in America, you know. But I didn't realize America was also.

So this whole dangerous place and, but you know, I got used to it. And I was just like, I'm not trying to be gangster or anything. So I just like skated and got into music and every time I'd experience something bad, you know, I'd be an instant regret. But like, you know, those moments changed me and it made me like want to be into art and music. Like I was in a drawing when I was a kid. I used to tag.

I didn't want to, you know, like. join like their graffiti gangs that just wanted to like tag on right ice cream trucks and walls you know like I didn't want to do anything like super bad because my mom would just be like you can get deported and you know shit like that and I'd just be like all right like that's crazy to think about like that as a fear like to hang over your head as a kid who's like where most kids don't have to worry about that so they are getting in trouble because that's what kids do we like we go out and we find other kids and we end up getting in trouble and in some neighborhoods it's it's gangs or graffiti gang or sometimes it's just kids being stupid that are every kid has a their little

gang of some kind right in like every neighborhood whatever and so to come here as a young kid not speaking the language then you get thrown into probably the school system yeah i went to public school. So, yeah, everyone was just, you know, everyone was a character. You'd see how some kids are raised by Cholos and you see just some like, I went to school with, and when I lived in Orange County, there were like neo-Nazis in my school. And it was great. I feel like I've seen every type of click and I've just been like, I don't know, I just tried to be neutral. Like, I don't really have problems with nobody. It feels like you're, it's interesting because I, I see you move and I know you you you're cool with everybody like you have friends and you but it feels like

you and your family are moving through the world together it's like it looks like this little trio of like it's it's amazing by the way as a as someone who always wanted a family I always like find myself kind of like gravitating towards family so when I see families that are functioning that functional in their own way like we all the lie is is that every family should be like this, right? Yeah, it's like we're all, our own family. But we're these, like, living organisms that grow, and, like, every single family's different. And, like, you're, like, it's so cool to me.

You're like the, you're like this example of, like, when I also think of, like, like, and I mean, use words that, for lack of a better, but, like, when I think of success, I don't think of success as like this or that or that. I think of success as like happiness and functionality. I just saw like all, like I think a lot of the rock stars I looked up to were family men. And like I did like all those like crazy junky dudes too. But I was also like I came to a point in my life where I was like I don't think I'm cut out for. being up till 12 the next day because I was going hard all night.

Like, yeah. I was just like, I want to have nice things. Like, I want to work and really hard and not burn my whole brain away. Yeah. Because I went through that phase too, and I was like, yeah, I should just be like a family, man. It's like, this is what I want, you know. It's like I feel safe this way. So, yeah, it just happened, you know, fell naturally.

But it's funny because. If you go out in the world, right, you're not met with, like, I feel like anyways, like, people wouldn't look at maybe either of us and go like, that's a fucking, that's a good dad. That's a family man. You know what I mean? Like, look at that family man. They would maybe see us in like, the funniest thing happened to me the other day. I won't get into it, but something happened in my neighborhood.

and it was a guy with tattoos or something. And everyone, like, called and was like, we don't want to say anything, but there was a thing with a guy of tattoos. And I'm like, it wasn't me. I wasn't here. But the fact that we have to have that conversation with people. Because you have tats.

Because you look a certain way, you know what I mean? Or you give off a certain vibe. Or they have an idea that maybe you behave a certain way. and like, we've been crazy, right, when we were young. We had our moments. But no more than any college kid or any other person out in their first few years of, like, adulthood. I'm not trying to get locked up, you know. Exactly.

God, you know, God forbid I ever get into anything. But it's like I just, I think I'm just protective, you know. Yeah. I've seen a lot of stuff, been in a lot of violent situations where, I was, you know, I had to man up and be like some of these things you can walk away from and you're not a coward, you're just smart. You're protecting your family. Yeah, you're protecting your family, your name, you're walking away for protection to put them

first. You know, I just, yeah, I feel like I give off that vibe too. Like I have tattoos. Don't smile, but I'm happy and I have my family. I just, I don't want to be that like, I'm so happy guy either. No, it's real. Like, you're human. Like, I get bummed all the time, like, and not because, you know, life's bad.

It's just, you know, things happen and I'm human. It's like, we're not perfect. So, I don't know. Just try to, I think the family is, like, a really solid foundation that should still be recognized with, like, especially, you know, if a lot of kids look up to me, I don't want them to view this whole family thing as, like, It has to be perfect. It has to be like this Instagram.

Like everything looks perfect. It's like it looks perfect because we're just showing you like when we're happy. Exactly. That's what I want people to know. Family is happiness. And yes, there's, you know, episodes with family where it's not so happy, but it's like. You work through them. Yeah.

Like I've never seen my parents give up. Like they've been married all their lives and they've had tough times. They've argued. But they make up. So I think that's why like I don't want to share like when I'm going through something. It's like, let me resolve it first, you know. Yeah, it's no one. I was saying that the other day too.

I was like, you know, of course when I show people something on Instagram, I'm going to show them the best picture I took of it. And if I show them my family, it's going to be us smiling. I'm not going to show them the moments where we're like bickering over something where we're like, you know, because we all do. They're good to acknowledge just so people don't think like, you guys are perfect. But it's like, yeah, it's like, I don't need to share this with nobody. It's like this is just between me and the fam.

But like what you're actually modeling in my opinion is how I feel is like you have, you have a real fan base, dude. You have people out there who look at you as, you know, for me, you're this modern artist who's making music on their own terms and having great success doing it, which is a rare thing. Most people have to buy into some kind of system usually to like have that success and you're doing it on your own terms. You say what you think, you say how you feel, you say when you think something's right, you say when you think something's wrong.

And you have people looking at you and your family and going, that's possible for me too. Because you probably have kids out there who, again, like I always say the people that reach for art it tends to be their way of getting out of something making it better making a better life healing something going through a traumatic childhood and coping right and like so they look to your art to help them do that and then they start to maybe imagine that they could do it and they become a graphic designer or they become a music a producer or they become an artist that's literally everything i am it's like you could do all of that like graphic design film, music.

And have a family. And have a family and still do what you want. It's so dope to me though because, and I'm just saying as a fan, when I see you on stage, when I see you in your videos, you have your own style, you have your own style, you have a way of like, your lens on things is really unique to you. And like, it's super, it's cool. It makes you go like, damn, that's fucking. can cool man how did how did he think to like it just feels like you're just being you but who you are

is cool right and i know you probably don't even feel that way you're just being you but at the end of the day the people that watch we are we watch music fans we watch and it informs us how to dress how to how to how to like like that's where we get stuff from is like we watch our favorite artists, you know. And it's cool to me that you're doing this. It feels naturally just following how you feel every step of the way, making the record you feel like making and saying what you feel like saying. And you have your family and you're just, it's honest. And it's kind of not, it's kind of refreshing when you live in a world full of Instagram, like where people are trying to present something that they think everyone wants to see.

And I understand that too. I'm not like hating on anyone for trying to succeed in the world any which way they do. But like we all do get kind of like tired of seeing like what we're supposed to see. And then we have someone like come along like you who's literally you came here from the Philippines. Then you had to go back, right? Yeah. Yeah, my dad just missed home and thought, like, we'd be okay, like, living out there. How was that?

How old were you when you went back? It was, like, 16 or 15 as, like, a culture shock. Wow. People out there would kind of laugh at me for having an American accent. So I was like, bro, like, what do I got to do to fit in? Like, I was born here. Right. You go home.

There's just always ways, like, for people to, like, divide you from the equation. So it was tough, man. That was like, not going to lie, that's the hardest part of my life. But getting out of there was always a goal. Because right before I left, I was playing in bands here. And I got a glimpse of it. You know, I went to this smell.

I watched a show out chain reaction. I was like, maybe one day, like, I could do this. But like, now that I'm in Manila, I have to figure out how to even get my music out. So luckily we had the internet and you know kids like Tyler were blowing up at the time and that was like what was inspiring me because I was like well I'm all the way over here like how do I get heard? So I just would make videos and upload them on YouTube send them to all the blogs I followed and some of them replied. So from that you know I would just kind of build

reputation with these people I don't really know and just you know share my music always and be nice to them and just be real and be like, how are you? Yeah. Yeah, just be a real person. I just don't want them to like just put me on. It's like I want to also be like, yo, like, you're going to do all this for me? You know, I'm here for you too. So I kind of just always, you know, that's how I've gotten so far.

I think I've always just been cool with everybody and just. You haven't forced anything. You've been like, yo, if you fuck with it, put it up. it's like I just yeah I mean I don't know just I don't want anything if someone wants to do something nice for me then it's like I'm eternally grateful and I'd return the favor anytime so it's you know like in the music industry I think that's that's what it's like when people show you love you just like respect that and treat them the same way like I don't know it's been it's been good man like living out here, there's a lot of musicians.

And, you know, a lot of them, you know, are very prominent artists. So it was good to move here and, like, people like yourself, like, would help someone like me is just still starting out, figuring this out. And we're just as lucky, though, because we get to be around really cool, special, special. You know, I always say special. because like there's people that stand out and when I hear your story it makes make total sense I'm like of course he has an interesting story because you're interesting it's it's interesting everything you do to me is interesting I'm like how do you think of that like where did that come from

I didn't even want life to be this way man it's tough it's just like you know like I think it was around high school I didn't even finish high school yeah so like felt like a super loser and then all my friends already went to college and had jobs and I was like what do I do like I don't have money to go to college I didn't even finish high school so I was like my best friend joyce was like you should just take music seriously since that's the only thing you get at he's being real with me you know he's like mean as fuck he'll be like you suck at everything but when he said that about the music I was like oh well okay like I'm just going to and not party with y'all every freaking weekend and stay home and record and that's where it started

really like getting focused because you know i'd see these guys like getting paid and i was just like how do i get how do i have anything in my life so i was like i have to create something right i have to create music like what did my favorite bands do they made songs they made viz something yeah so you build it they come so i was like how much do i got to build and how many years will this take took 10 years to go viral or whatever yeah i've been wow 10 years yeah i was in amazing i got my first deal when i was 22 yeah and um nothing even happened you know i just got signed i they brought me on tour with a bigger band and i would see how things went and i'd just be like well i'm not ready but that you started learning you went that was your college you know yeah started getting

your degree. Because I didn't go to college, so I was like grateful that I got to move to London and, you know, meet bigger artists and just hang out with them. And that's cool. I didn't know that that was even a thing. So you went to London? Yeah, because in Manila, the industry there is really based around showbiz. So it's like very like pretty boy, pretty girl, like they can dance. bro, I'm not going to dance. You know, like, I'm here to play guitar. Like, you know, like. And.

So you went, okay, so you're in Manila. You're like, I'm going to focus. I'm going to start making music. Making songs that I knew, like, would do good, like, overseas. And I would just upload them online. Well, and to be fair, you came from overseas. Yeah. So you were probably more at that age, you were probably dug in here.

And then you're getting you're getting informed. You're playing in those bands. You're learning how to, how music works, how to make music. Then you have to go to Manila. And you're back in, you're back there after. That's stage one, basically. Was it 10 years? You weren't, since you moved.

You moved back 10 years later. And then I've been to Manila. It's a beautiful. I mean, it's a great place that people are really nice, but it's crazy there. Yeah, the poverty is still. It feels, it definitely is real. Yeah. Everyone's really nice.

And it's like the Philippines are a great place up to visit. And we got to go play shows and we had amazing shows there. I mean, just amazing. Like the music fans there. There's a real culture there for music. But it's a big ass city with a lot of people and it is real. It's a real city. And to think about like being a kid that's 15 that gets taken out of what he knows

for the last 10 or 11 years here. Yeah. Put there. And then I just had to start over. It was like, you know, I was already playing like backyard shows out here. And it just felt like it was going to go somewhere. And then bam, my dad's like, let's move back. And I was just like, all right, it might be cool.

Well, here we. Yeah. I mean, what can you do at that age when your dad says you got to move somewhere? Yeah, it wasn't about abandon them and be like, no. But I'll bet when you go back to the. Philippines to play when that day comes and I don't know if you have yet but like you will one day you're going to go back there and play a show I guarantee you like there's a very special relationship with the music with the music fans there that you'll you'll have because I think

it started man yeah I think they'll embrace you because of that it really did start there when I lived here dude like I thought I was just going to graduate high school and work at Starbucks yeah when I moved out there I was like I was like I was like maybe I'll get signed one day. I was just imagining all this wild shit. Like, why? All the stuff that happened. And my dad also, you know, would feed these ideas into my head.

I remember we'd go on these family trips and he'd be like, you know, son, maybe one day you can sign and tour the world. And I'd just be like, people do that? Like, you know, like, that's real. That's interesting, though, because, like, I always talk about manifesting and creative visualization and how we imagine our future, and that's the future. Like some version of that future is actually what we end up having. My dad definitely manifested it, man.

He would say the wildest shit. Like, you're going to be, like, you know, bigger than I could imagine. And I would just be like, mm-hmm. I mean, it's crazy, though, because something he saw, and, you know, like, we always kind of dismiss our parents when they're, like, complimenting us because like my kids do it when i'm like you're really good at that they are really good at what i'm saying but they are like dad whatever you always like you you think i'm good at everything and i'm like yeah not really actually i actually think you're good at that and we get

into these little arguments and but i can see actually what they're good at and i also it's like not bias either but also your dad did something at a high level right he was he worked for an entertainment company and he understood like I think he had an ability to understand like things at levels so when you get to a high level to a high level you start to understand like when someone's competent at something and when they're not and I think he probably identified in you like that there is this like I think this like they say like the the the X factor or the thing like there is something special about artists when you notice like, man, that kid's different. All these other ones that are trying, I don't see, but then that kid stands out and he hasn't

even sung yet. It's like the first time I saw you, when you notice the dude who walks in the room, like, who's that guy? He's fucking cool as shit. What's he doing? He's an artist. And you're like, of course he is. And then you hear their music and you're like, fucking, of course he is.

Like, that's how it feels when you see like someone who's meant to be. and like whether you're I mean your dad had to see it you could say it's just because he's my dad and he loves me and you're like no he probably didn't say that about like when he was saying that dude I could barely like do guitar solos exactly you know I was like but he saw it I suck that guitar it's just like but yeah I mean he would be like but you know these Nirvana songs are just like two chords and I'd just be like yep he was right same guy who all yeah I don't know it's weird does he ever say I was right I think he can say that all he wants now. Yeah. He's super proud. Like, ever since I signed a RCA, he even made his profile pick the old RCA logo. I was like, oh, my God, Dad.

That's great. But that's great. That's what Dad's supposed to do. It was cute. I was just like... It's like how I am with my kids. I'll be, like, putting their Little League picture or something up. They love it, man.

Yeah, to them, like... We're always going to be the dads. We're always going to be corny to our kids. It doesn't matter. I just never thought it happened. But that's because I was born in the slums. I didn't think, like, there was possibilities for... Doesn't feel very possible there.

Yeah, I mean, you know, when I was... Like I told you, when I was in high school, I thought I'd just, like, work at Starbucks and play in these underground fans. I don't know. Like, I didn't think anything, like, all the stuff I've done lately. Like, that's legendary. It is. Do you feel like,

I feel like you're just getting started? Exactly. Yeah, no. Like, that's what I say to a lot of people now. Like the world's just getting to know you. Like, congrats, you did it. I'm like, dude, I still have 10 more years of, like, you know, being fit and able to do this.

Like, I'm just starting. Like, I still want to make this, like, a living, you know. Yeah. And, yeah, I don't think, like, I've even reached, like, my peak. I just got to keep working, really. It's freaking hard. Yeah. Do you make music all the time?

Yeah. Yeah. It's, like, battling with myself every day, doubt, fear, anxiety. Of course. Even, like, before I play shows, I'll be like, no, it's going to show. Yeah. Then, like, when everyone's there, I'm like, what the fuck? going on. It's like, I'm just freaking out all the time. Like, I can never have peace. Even if I go on

vacation, man, like, I'll just... Your brain always goes. I'm always thinking the worst. Yeah, but like, what if, is it, I mean, the way I, what I hear when you say that. I'm positive, right? But I'm like, inside of me is like, there's like a voice that's always like... But what I think that is, just from being, like, older than you, right? And I'm just sharing you know, take it for what it is. I actually think creatives, because I've dealt with that for a long time. And I think that we are driven by imagination. We had to imagine our life, right?

You imagined all this somewhere. You imagined it. And then you're living it now. And now you're imagining what's ahead of you. The further we get down the road, it starts to get a little hard to imagine what's beyond this because I think it takes us a minute to take in where we're at to actually own it and to go like, no, this is my real life. My real life is not there where I was in the slums. My real life is now here. I can go and get $100 out of the ATM and take my family to dinner and drive my car

where I couldn't do that there. None of this existed and now it exists. And I think it takes a minute to like take that in and actually physically be in the present because we we're catching up you know and then we while we're doing that we're trying to imagine the future and the next thing so we can keep climbing the mountain because we at the end of the day you didn't do this because you were like eh whatever you saw something you said i bet i could climb that and then you started climbing right yeah and it's like the the the good part of us right like the child part of us that likes to have fun and play and be cool with everyone is actually the best part of us. That's like the true part of us.

The part of us, I think that we have to defend ourselves against the world because it's a tough place is actually the less true part of us because those moments where we have to defend ourselves are actually like kind of few and far between in reality. Yeah. But they damage us so much that they cause us to kind of like always be on the guard. And then if we're always on guard, we actually are taking that. fun part of us and shoving it here to protect it. And I think it's like that constant struggle between the past, the present,

what we have, what we didn't have, always jumbled up and then what we want for the future because we're never going to stop dreaming. Anyone that tells you to be satisfied is wrong. It's the only way you're going to make art is by dreaming and going forward, I think. And so we always have to want more. We always have to want to achieve more.

It's the only way we're going to create. anything worthwhile. And it's just who we are. It's our lot in life, right, as artists. And I think that like it's all from imagination. And that's the struggle is even when you go on vacation, even when you're just chilling, playing with your son, even when you're at dinner with your wife. And thank God they don't have to like go through this as well. Like my wife, thank God, seriously. My wife has to deal with me. That's what that's, because she's calm. That's why I'm like, I'll praise to them because I'm like a bomb. But they understand that we're these like, what I would say, dynamic, right?

Imaginative. Yeah, my imagination is too much. I think that's why even the like. That's why it can go wild. Those things sidetrack, like can sidetrack you from just focusing on what's in front of you. So yeah, that's all I struggle with, you know, like. But you know what? I think that we all do.

Like, I think that, like, what you're going through is, like, interesting to hear that because I'm sitting here going, like, ah, you know, I'm not alone. Well, yeah, man, it's like I don't want to be the guy who makes the cry for help because it's like I just want to also prove to myself that I can get through this and I see everyone around me still here. So I'm like, let's just keep pushing because everyone's standing strong. And I feel like... And you're leading your family.

Like that's what you're doing. You're going forward. But also the all the stuff that comes with having... Also, like what you would say is ADD, I always think like we're actually just hyper-focused. Oh, yeah. And when we're hyper-focused on the wrong thing, it's not good. But when we're hyper-focused on the wrong thing, it's not good. right thing it's it's it's a stroke of genius it's a it's a piece of art right and so we look at like

these moments and go like why am i so anxious what i learned how to do as i got older was was actually stop and recognize when i was feeling anxious and go i wonder why i'm feeling anxious take a minute with it it took me like many years to like learn how to to to like get that that kind of wild animal in my control because my imagination a lot of times felt like a wild animal it felt like it was running all over the place and sometimes it was in a good place where I would create things all the good things I've ever created in my life whether it's music I think or a company or a friendship or anything good in my life came from my imagination the good part and all the problems I've ever had I think came from my imagination on the bad side yeah

So it's like which side am I going to focus my energy on? Trying not to manifest any more bad things. But no, yeah, I don't think I have for like a long time. But that's just the battle. You know, I just like constantly try to stay away from anything I feel could disrupt my peace. Yeah, negative disruptive things. Or even things that happen in, you know, my, in Elvia's life. Like, if she is going through things, I try to be the wise one to be like, you're going to get through this.

This is just for now, you know, like, I don't know. Yeah, like family is the number one thing in my life. And then, yeah, I just try to skate when I need to like, because that's what I need to stop thinking that like that. Right, just go skate. I just go skate. or anything like physical where you don't like have to think for a second. Yeah, you get, you play video games even. You get in your body and you're just thinking about skating or you're thinking about whatever the physical, whatever you're playing basketball.

Just living in L.A. I think you just got to step out the house. Right. Go for a walk. Everyone needs that because like if you're working all the time, it's like you get in your head too much. Yeah. You just kind of need a break and too much of anything's bad. Do you think your parents had a big influence on your love of family? Yeah, because I always wanted a love like that where they never gave up, no matter how annoying they were to each other.

You know, they'd always be loyal and just make up. And, you know, it could be a little toxic, but I think. It's a healthy thing where, especially if you have a family, like, I'm not against people splitting up. Yeah, sometimes it happens. But, yeah, you know, as much as possible, I respect when people just keep it together. And I think that's a beautiful thing. It's like, we could all just wild out and just not care about each other. but I think it's really deep when you just put all that aside and value, like, family,

and I don't know. Those are just the kind of... That's what I always wanted. Those are the ethics that I always thought were, like, you know, golden. So I just... Where do your parents live? They're in Manila. Oh, cool.

Yeah, I'm trying to get them out here, which takes a while. Yeah. Yeah. But they, yeah, they're good. Like, I think they're healthy now. Yeah. Hopefully. I always kind of wanted that, too.

I just thought, I mean, my parents split up when I was young. But it was one of my goals always was like when I get, when I settle down, I want to just just be with one person and try to build a family that we're the moment, where me and my wife are always together. I want to be a grandpa. Exactly. With the grandma. Yeah. And then like I, and then you go through it. I've been, I've been married for 12, 12 years and been with Nicole for 16 years.

And like you realize, like, why people split up. You get it. Like, it's a, it's a real life you're building. And there's moments where, like. No one's perfect. And like people have their moments. Like, people have their moments. moments where it's a season of life or it's a moment of life and you you have to like it becomes

deeper than just like the the idea that we're a couple it's deeper than that like you become i think like real family you become best friends you become dependent on each other in a way that's it's deeper than i think um than just a love relationship it's a it's high it's it's way deeper than that for me it feels like it feels like family it feels like it feels like This is the person I want to have my back. Sometimes people award it like codependency and I'm like, what do you get these ideas? It sounds really negative. Yeah, I'm like, yo, like some people just want a solid person in their corner for life.

And all the time. And some people want to be players all their life. And, you know, there's no right or wrong. But I just ended up being the guy who wanted to just be, you know, married and have family. Like, that's chill to me. Look at all, look at John Lennon and Yoko Ono. I mean, they're still in love and he's not even here. Yeah.

Like, I could feel their love. I don't know. Yeah. It's in all his music, everything left behind family. I mean, if I go, like, I hope I leave that behind, like, all that love between us. And, you know, it's better than my old music is just about, like, doing drugs. It's not that cool, you know. It's like, especially when you, you know, people burn themselves out and need to go to rehab.

It's like, that stuff's sad. That's what made me want to change because. You saw a lot of that happening. Yeah, it's sad, man. It's like you'd never expected to happen to anyone, but it'll happen, you know. Some people just love getting messed up all the time. Yeah, I think that they're, like, medicating some pain that they can't. Yeah.

Yeah, usually a lot of my friends that are like that have like crazy family issues. That's why I think the family thing is important. It's like that's solid families. It starts at home. Yeah. Yeah. And the proof of, and the proof like is always your kid, right? When you see.

If he's acting up, it's probably my fault. So I'm just like, I got to get it together. I feel that way. I feel like if I, if the calm home creates the calm kid, right the peaceful home creates the peaceful vibe with the kids the the the home that where you feel like everyone's cheering each other on and supporting each other you see that and then you may meet someone and you and you think like you you your first judgment is like oh this person's is really negative and they're really this or they're really that but then you if you go and look behind

like you go and look at the home they grew up in maybe they were getting criticism all the time. Maybe they were just getting, not getting support. And then we don't actually live in a world where it's like cool to sit there and talk about like, hey, so when I was growing up, my family was really not supportive. They were critical of me all the time. It made me feel really bad about myself. I could go on about that too with my life. But I've learned to like forgive my parents. Yeah. Because now that I'm a parent, I'm like, okay, can't give you guys shit because I'm, because we're all just trying to do that now. too.

Yeah. So yeah, literally every, every choice you make reflects on your kids. And yeah, I don't blame my parents being the way they were. Like, they were probably just trying their best, you know. Especially at the time with the tools they have, with the information. It's not like we had, my parents didn't have the internet to go on and go Google like, what's the best way to teach your kid how to, whatever. Like, I literally will Google shit.

I'll literally Google everything. I'll be like, best way to build confidence in a teen, you know, and then I'll read like 50 things. And I'll actually find one that I like, go, you know what? That guy looks like that doctor or so-and-so actually feels like he knows what he's talking about. And then I'll go down a rabbit hole. I'll research the doctor and say, like, who is he? And then you'll find out it's some real therapist who's done tons of research and you agreed with his point of view. and then you take a little piece of that back and you apply it,

even if it's just a little piece, it actually affects in a positive way, whatever it is you're trying to do as a parent. Our parents didn't have shit. Yeah. They were not like, let me just check that out before I make a decision here. I'm going to Google it. There were only telephones.

Is it? And mail. You call your aunt or your uncle or whoever and be like. Remember meeting up with your friends? And just hoping they show up in an hour. Yeah. Like, yeah, I'm going to be at the 7-Eleven. You better be there, man.

And they're like 30 minutes late and you'd think they died. You're sitting on the curb waiting. You're just like, man, are we going to skate or was? This person probably got ran over. Yeah, it's crazy. My parents would always tell me that too, like, I didn't have nothing for Christmas. Yep.

I'd be like, okay. Doesn't change my Christmas. As I got older, like, I remember we hit tough times when I was a teenager and I'd have those Christmases where I didn't get nothing. I was just grateful for other things, which was like the family, you know, they were there for me. They'd make us food and we'd spend time, watch a movie. It was better than getting a present.

Yeah. Sometimes you just get a present and then you don't even hang out. It's just like... Yeah, it's true. You know, I had every experience. Like, I've had... It wasn't, like, rich, but, you know, I've been middle class, and then we lost money and whatever, you know.

Yeah. I just try to keep it real and, like, it's not about that stuff anyway. Like... Where's your favorite place to live in the world? Here. L.A.? Yeah. Yeah.

It's nice, huh? It's... Can't complain. I don't know, man. I can't like, I have nothing bad to say about LA. My whole life, you know, got better when I moved here. But yeah, America's nice. I went to Miami recently. That's cool. That's a nice vibe. Maybe one day I'll, like, be able to live there. Yeah. I mean, you will. Yeah, like, L.A. is nice. Miami's nice. I love New York.

New York's cool. I mean, I like everywhere I go almost. But yeah, America is the place, like, in my head. I've lived in London, you know, before. So I don't know. There's just nothing like America. It is pretty, it is, it's weird how it, like, feels that way, right? Like, you always get back here and you're like, especially when I get to L.A.,

I can get tired of L.A., but then I'll go, I love New York. I'll go to New York for, like, a couple weeks and come back here. And I'm, when you land, you're happy. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I wouldn't say it's laid back either. LA's got like a sneaky hustle to it because it feels laid back, but everybody is working and everybody's doing stuff. It's just different.

It's aggressive too. It's aggressive, yeah. Like the driving and. And it's, it's, it's a very like, it's a crazy city. There's all these different pockets in different places and like. Don't want to end up in the wrong place. You don't want to end up in the wrong neighborhood in L.A. You have to really like, it is like a city like that where it's a little deceiving when you see it on TV or whatever.

And then you, you're just driving through Hollywood and you make a right turn and you're on the wrong neighborhood or you go through. Everyone's here. That's the thing. It's like all the dangerous people are here. All the good people are here. Everyone's here. The devils, the angels. They're all in the same city.

I think every city is like that. like that though yeah every city has its stuff and it's things and i just like the beach and being able to go to the snow in an hour that's like yeah that's something you don't experience anywhere you snowboard no i just i haven't yet cool i don't either i'm just i hope this year will be the first year i go i never could get it i just i didn't grow up skiing or snowboarding it was like kind of if and i'm not categorizing it now it's different but when i was i was was a kid it was like a rich sport that's a rich thing no you know you know like imagine buying a snowboard like who has an extra who has a couple of extra thousand dollars to buy a snowboard the jacket

the pants the helmet the gloves get a spot in the woods like in the ski pass and then go there when get off work and go there for how many days okay wait we're flying like it always seemed like To me, when I was growing up, that was like, oh, that's what rich people do. They go skiing and snowboarding and, like, that's cool. And then so when I got older and I actually had the means to go snowboard, I never, for whatever reason, it didn't live in my soul to learn. I tried once or twice. I fell down a bunch of times.

And I was like, I'm terrible at this. It doesn't live in me. It's not in my, it's not a part of my history. You like sledding? I love sledding. I'll do the tubing and the sledding. That thing is fun. That's what I do.

So now, if, like, every couple years we'll go up, like, to the mountains somewhere. And my kids are actually, like, we don't ski every year, but, like, we've been a few times, enough times from when they were little to now. My son can snowboard. He can kind of shred. And my daughter skis, my wife skis. Have you gone skiing? Me? Yeah.

I tried. I terror. I like, it was, it was a mess. It looks scary. And they all make fun of me the whole time because I'm falling down the whole time. It's pretty scary. And then the lift is really scary because you're just like sitting here.

Anyway, so now when I go, I've resigned myself to like, look, you guys go ski for a day or two. And then one day, one of the days we're going sledding. We're going to go to the, there's like these mountains where you can just tube or sled or whatever. And then that's what we do for me. And the rest, I'm just hanging and just like. taking pictures before they go out and then I'll just chill.

Doing the dad thing. Yeah. It's like the beach. Yeah. Because I didn't grow up near a beach either. Yeah, I hate going to the ocean, honestly. I can't go in the ocean. I'm too scared.

So I don't surf. I don't do any of that. I'm not an extreme guy. I just like jumping off stuff when I skate. But yeah, the ocean, no thanks. I had to swim in the 100 islands one time. in the Philippines and my friends were like yeah let's go swim to this island so we hopped off the boat and we swam to this like wooden thing that was floating in the middle of the ocean and on the

way to this like wooden platform I just froze up and I looked down there's jellyfish and I'm like oh my god I have to get out of here dude like yeah yeah you can't do that's too deep I'll go fishing that's as far as I'll go I like to fish I like to fish but I won't go in the ocean i won't swim in the ocean i won't do any of that all funny i make like surf surf rock songs and i think it's skating not surfing because i see you like when i hear your music i do related to skating it's not all skating but yeah it's like fully i got into music like the niche stuff that i found were in skate videos like all the cool weird stuff you thought That was cool.

Like black flag songs. Like you would never, well, I mean, that was the first place I discovered it. So, yeah, and then you guys were on TV when I was growing up. So I was like, I want to do this, but I don't know how. And then you did it. Yeah. That's how we were. We were the same way.

We were just like. Who were your idols when you're like? You know, I was, it was the 90s. And what we had access to was a radio. and magazines. And we didn't have... And I'd watch MTV when I went to, like, a friend's house. We didn't have cable, but at the time,

whenever I was at a friend's house, I would, like, turn on MTV and just, like, watch it for an hour. It would be the one, like, artists you'd get... I would... I used to video, I used to record the TV on VHS. Yeah. When I'd see, like, Puff Daddy.

I like... I liked... You guys. I liked all that. liked um i loved i loved i love teupac i love biggie i love j z i love gz i love the beastie boys so you saw that growing up yeah and i loved um and then i loved rancid and i loved um i loved i loved green day i loved the like all the punk stuff coming out of the bay uh i would just kind of eat it i would just kind of look in magazines and anything that was coming out of California, social distortion, anything that was not, you know, for

me it was like the dream was to get out of where I was from. So I always had this dream of going to California because I'd never been, I didn't even been on a plane until I was 19. So I was kind of like just the next, the first chance I get to go, I'm going and I'm never coming back. And that's kind of how I felt about. I think it was just a rough childhood. the I wanted to escape from became a fantasy of like leaving.

And music was the vehicle, right? Yeah, there's a spaceship. Exactly. But then, you know, like I think the important part of the journey was like learning that I actually, I think the most important part was learning my own value. I didn't place a high value on myself when I was young. I just wanted to get out of where I was from because I think I hated my life. And then I got into music and I never took myself that seriously.

I kind of just making music and it was like it felt like I was the luckiest guy in the world that didn't feel like I was like no one cared what I was saying. I was just, that's how I felt, right? You guys were saying stuff. But we were kind of saying stuff without even knowing we were saying stuff. We were definitely just being subconsciously making music. We didn't really think too much about what we were saying. We were just saying it.

Yeah. And then you listen back and they're like, oh, damn, you had some stuff to say. You were a little, you were working some stuff out in those songs. And now, like, I've had a lot of time to think about it. Probably too much time to think about it. I'm probably more cerebral than I should be. But, like, that's just where I'm at.

And that's how I like to be. But I like to, I love to listen to music and dissect what someone's feeling. And, like, maybe, even if they're not aware of, like, maybe. Because sometimes as artists, we just kind of like stream of consciousness, let out whatever comes out and it feels good to sing. And then you listen back and you're like, oh, damn, like, that's, I'm saying something there. You guys had songs about, like, classism. I don't know.

I think it was. But at the time, it was as simple as we. It was like pop punk at the time was like the thing, you know. And I don't know. But for us at the time, I think the classism thing was literally just we didn't have money. Yeah. And we literally said, we wrote a song about if you don't want it. it will take it.

And then everyone turned it into like kind of like eat the rich type thing, which I, which is cool. But it wasn't that cool. Like we, it wasn't that complicated when we wrote the song. We were just like, hey, if you don't want to be rich and famous, give it to me because I do, because I got nothing. Exactly. And it wasn't saying that rich and famous is bad.

It was saying, no, there's a lot of bands. I think even I grew up with that I were like. fuck fame and I've always been like hey that doesn't look too bad to me like fame looks kind of sick you're like doesn't that just mean that everybody fucks with your shit or like that you're doing well in my mind when I was young that's what it meant it still does man it's like I like don't want to be poor so it's like I just I look at success and I'm like man can a guy like me who had nothing like live that life like that's well you know the answer is yes and then you know you just can't forget that this thing is about just loving what you do and having fun yeah and finding the balance of like

what i feel like we probably agree on at all costs i'm going to take care of my family and i'm never going to go back i'm never going to go backwards i'm never going to go yeah i never look back Like, ever since I came here, that's funny. You asked, like, where my parents are, and if I'd ever go back there, I don't. I really have no plans of going back. I think, like, you know, doing it here is the only place you can really do it. But I want people to know that, like, you can be from there and you can come here and you can change your whole life. Like, you don't have to be.

You got out of your town It doesn't matter what town You come from Just like as long as you make that move That big leap That big leap is the Probably the hardest thing too Because like you have people around you

That would be like maybe it's actually not such a good idea But if you feel it deep down It is It's the best idea probably And hopefully you know people are just fearless i think that what you're saying is you just summed up how i feel you really did and i think that like but i listen i think that you'll probably end up going back to manila one day on your own terms because you have to because your music has to be you have to

go play there because you're i would love to you know like you're you're fit you're what you're building with your music around the world is like I mean look at your Spotify followers dude look at the look at how much of an like you have this music that is unique to itself and it's it's reaching masses of people it's not just a little group of people it's it's building this large group around the world of people who believe in you who you fuck with you, love your art. And it's inevitable that you're going to have to go all these different places in the world and play for the people that love your music.

But I think it's cool to go to be, every time, I mean, you've been back to London and you went back on your own terms. When you go to Japan, when you go to Manila, when you go to wherever your music takes you in the world, it's going to be. on your terms, which is also to me, like, the best part of the story. Like, I guess I always wonder, like, I always kind of think of like life if we were watching a movie, how would we want the movie to like, if you, like, when I think about your story, when you tell me the things that you've, like, the journey you've been on, I go,

well, how else would I want the movie to be? It sounds like, it's hard to go through, but as a fan, you watch something and go, I wouldn't want this movie to be playing any other way. Like that beginning of the movie was fucking great. But now we're here and it's great. You know, so like I always imagine like, well, what's the next part of the movie? I think you're in like a really great place. I'm excited for the new music.

Thanks, man. I'm excited to watch the family grow. They're growing. Yeah. Yeah, he's growing so fast. Crazy. Elvia is just becoming more of a mom. And it's lovely to see, man.

Like, it's all we wanted. Yeah, we're lucky. We were just talking about this, like, when we would be in bed and be like, oh, like, wouldn't it be nice if we had a family? Here we are. And here we are, like, it would be nice to get some sleep. I'm just kidding. Yeah, exactly. That doesn't happen for years.

No, yeah. I'm still waiting. I got a couple more years. Yeah, you're in the trenches right now. Yeah, it's all good, though. It's what I signed up for. Thanks for coming and talking. Thank you.