Artist Friendly with Joel Madden - Ian Shelton of Militarie Gun

Episode Date: July 3, 2024

On this week's episode of Artist Friendly, Joel Madden is joined by Ian Shelton of Militarie Gun. Though Militarie Gun are only a year removed from their buzzy debut album, Life Under the Gun, they���ve essentially been touring nonstop — first on their own headliner and then opening dates for A Day to Remember this past June. It’s a mentality that defines the band — always moving, looking forward, and giving back to the community that raised them to achieve something far greater. “Touring is disruptive, but it also fits in the rhythm of my life — waking up, getting in the van, and driving in the next city is a thing that makes sense to my brain,” Shelton explained during their AP cover story interview. “I can pretty much do that on an infinite loop.” ------- Listen to their Artist Friendly conversation on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify.⁠⁠⁠ ------- Follow Artist Friendly! IG: @artist.friendly TikTok: @artist.friendly YouTube: youtube.com/@artist.friendly ------- Host: Joel Madden, @joelmadden Executive Producers: Joel Madden, Benji Madden, Jillian King Producers: Josh Madden, Joey Simmrin, Janice Leary Visual Producer/Editor: Ryan Schaefer Audio Producer/Composer: Nick Gray Music/Theme Composer: Nick Gray Cover Art/Design: Ryan Schaefer Additional Contributors: Anna Zanes, Neville Hardman Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, what's up everybody? I'm Joel Madden, and this is artist-friendly. On this episode, I'll be sitting down with singer-songwriter, producer, and frontman of the band Military Gun, Ian Shelton. Let's go. I think I was pretty compliant when I was a teenager. I was like a total nerd, like, but rebellious just basically in the way of dressing and and getting in trouble at school, but not like, I didn't need no prompt to get out of bed, nothing like that. Oh, right. You got out.

You know, that was it. I had to go. Yeah. No other options. How were you a nerd? I just always, so. You liked learning? Not like learning in the school sense.

Oh, okay. Liked learning in the whatever was interested me at the time. Like, I know, like, I go through periods, right? So I was like, for a while it's movies. And then you subcarrier, it's like, all right, I was obsessed with this. director, this, whatever. And then, like, music, it's like, yeah, I get into genres and artists and then deep dive and then, like, learn everything and then be like, now I'll never listen to that again. Right. I'm over it. Which is learning. Yeah. Yeah. So I like learning, but only when it's not

mastering, mastering, like, subjects you are interested in. Yeah. So even, like, you could say a band or a genre, and then you go all the way to the end of the rabbit hole, you find that, you find the band that the band that influenced the band. You go deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper. And then you get on the other side of it and you've like... You basically learn so much that it becomes it... You learn that what they're doing is a cheap trick. And they're like, I'm out.

I'm good. Yeah, de-mystifies. That's the only thing about music. It's unfortunate. That's unfortunate when you see behind the curtain. I have this conversation with my brother's wife, Cameron, is a big actress, right? So obviously been in movies for decades. And we talk about this.

She says, I can't watch a movie without hearing the writing, seeing the cameras behind. She's like, I just see too. I've done it for so long. And her brain, I think, acclimates towards how? Like, how did they do that? Yeah, yeah. And I think she's like, I can't watch a movie without thinking. Definitely.

I mean, the same thing. I've directed a lot of music videos. And now I think with like an AD brain. I think about the budget of the thing, which is the last thing you should be thinking about when you're watching something that's artistic. Yeah. But like, I'm like, all right, so this movie's actually five locations. We're going to go location A and then location B.

You'll see location C, but we're going to go back to location A. And it's like, I think about the budget breakdown like an AD while watching movies. And it's like the last thing that I should be doing. Like you're the maker. Yeah. So it's like someone eating food that's a chef is going to taste it differently than just little old me, I'm going to eat and go, oh, this is good.

Yeah, yeah. And maybe I'll taste some flavors, but I'll be like, just taste good, you know. But a chef would be like more critical. I think you're saying it goes beyond like the technical, which is like the vibe and the... The intangibles, the intangibles that create a whole picture. And I struggle with that because I can be too judgmental

and miss things because I'm like, no, that's not, that's fake. Yeah, that's not authentic. Yeah, yeah. Which authenticity, like, as you learn as you get older, can also be, like, an affectation. You can fake the authenticity. Like, some people, you'll learn, I found that, like,

they're just really good at mirroring you so that you don't know what their actual personality is, but they do it long enough that you get tricked. I had that happen recently where I was like, someone I thought was really genuine. I was like, oh, no, you're actually a sociopath. Like, you're a psycho.

You're a psycho. Yeah, this is like a very, very weird thing. It's a new thing for me to learn that authenticity could just be, the authenticity in quotes could be an affectation. Yeah, I didn't know we were going to go here today, but I love it. Maybe there's something we do when we think we need something from someone. Like maybe there's something in people where if they have an idea of you and they have a relationship with that idea of you,

you, especially think about this, you're in a band. So you're going to meet people that have a preconceived idea of who you are based on your art. That you made at a small portion of time, period of time that doesn't actually reflect your whole life or the whole sum of who you are. But it is what you've captured in that time, put out into the world, and then it becomes the bigger part of who you are to the rest of the world. So you can say like with my music, your perception of me might be what you know of my music or whatever, but that's actually the smallest pieces of me in little periods of time that don't reflect actually the whole life. Yeah, yeah.

The whole person. We get these really narrow ideas of people from social media, from art, from however they project out into the world. Yeah. And then we kind of attach that idea that we've, we've put a flavor on it. That's chocolate, that's vanilla, that's mint chocolate chip, that's Rocky Road, that's cookies and cream. And like, that's what our idea is. And it's actually not true. Well, because that's presentation. And presentation is different than authenticity or anything else. And like, I think about

it. I mean, I like, we post on the band socials, but like as far as what I post from my, I like having a private life. I like not, nobody knowing what I'm doing until I'm presenting it to them. Yeah. Because the presentation gets in the way of living an authentic life most of the time. And so you're like, I'll, when I've released a record, that's something that I'm ready, that's a presentation that is meant for the public where everything else is like not that, you know? And then when you get to meet someone authentically where they don't have a perception of you, that's a different experience. Yeah.

Then when you get to meet someone where you might have a perception of each other. Yeah. Well, I was even just referring to, I had a good friend that I just was like, I feel like all of a sudden the curtain got pulled up and I was like, oh shit, like this is crazy. So it's less so on the like day-to-day meeting people because of the band perception thing. How long were you, we're friends with them? I mean, like probably like five, six years. Yeah, it's long enough.

Yeah, and then you're like, and then enough, you know, the dominoes start falling. You're like, whoa, you've been like lying this whole time, you know? That's always weird, isn't it? It is. Well, I don't understand. I have like a very weird binary brain. And so like lie, like lying. I definitely have done it before.

I've done it, you know, as same as anyone else. But it's like the idea of like, oh, I'm going to tell a lie is like a crazy concept. Like to like know that you're lying. Because I think there's times and it's a lot of what I sing about on our record, which is like this I didn't understand what I actually was feeling and feelings change and like you change as a person which then makes a liar out of you over time. But like to instantly go into a situation and know that you're lying is not something that I opt to do, I don't think.

You know, like... To start with a lie. Yeah, to know that you're lying is crazy. Right. And then you're like, the type of person that can do that is a very dangerous person. It's scary to me. I don't know. The idea that you're willing is crazy.

Yeah, I never thought about that. I wondered on your record, especially the last one, I was wondering this. Are you singing about plutonic relationships or are you singing about romantic relationships? Are you singing about the relationship? There's a couple different relationships we have, right? Yeah. There's the relationship we have with ourself. So sometimes I can be singing to me.

Yeah, definitely. There's the relationship we have with the world or society. I could be singing at that. There's a plutonic relationship we have with like people we interact with friends. Or like are more intrapersonal relationships, family. And then there's the romantic relationship, which is a different relationship. Yeah, yeah. On your record, are you, is there one relationship?

shit is there who are you singing to because i i can't quite make sense of it yeah like i mean it's good a good way it's kind of all the above i mean it's like so much about friendship it's so much about love it's so much like about the crossroads of all those things and definitely romantic in some ways i mean it's more of a breakup record in the like latter half in the talking about like not fully understanding your own feelings and because of that you you end up hurting other people and But even then, in a platonic way, you could do that as well. Like, like, the way you carry yourself through the world and the way that you, like, don't expend your time for people because you're too busy in your own head.

And, yeah, for me, it was like, I mean, I think a large amount of the jumping point was romantic, but then just letting it bleed into everything else. Like, the last song on the record is called Life Run of the Gun. And it's so much, it's so much about just your feelings changing, you know, and like acknowledging how like for myself being like manic and crazy and like choosing to burn my life down at times and then like starting something new and then being like wait shit this isn't what I wanted either and then um and then being like can I move forward into the next situation of my life without having that be like overburdening on the next thing like moving actually moving on and

not letting like pass things like fuck up the next thing yeah yeah yeah that's that's a real thing Did you have a bad breakup? Not a bad breakup. Just one that I felt uncomfortable with my own actions. And so much, again, like, is about making mistakes. And, like, I grew up around really flawed people. I grew up going to AA with my mom. And so I just grew up around flawed people.

And because of that, like, the culture surrounding mistakes has obviously changed largely in the world. And I wanted to kind of sing about it from a first-person perspective because I think we've kind of lost that. it's like a lot of just pointing the finger at other people. And I feel like specifically men so few people like seem to have any moment of self-reflection about their own way that they act in relationships. And whether that be romantic, platonic, anything, but you're just like trying to reassess

the way that you see yourself in the world and acknowledge that mistakes are like inherent and hurting people is kind of inherent as far as the human experience goes. And I don't know, just trying to like change. the culture in whatever way I can surround in the concept of mistakes and hurting other people. Not that it's like a thing that like needs to be instantly forgiven,

but it's just like, you know, not enough people talk about regret in a way that's like transparent. We are kind of at a time where everybody's laundry is out on the street. Yeah. Right? Like that's just where we're at.

And if it's not, it will be. Yeah. Like we live in a time where everyone shares everything and it can be chaotic, it can be dangerous, it can be, it's a double-edged sword. Yeah. So on the good is less people can get away with things, which is a good thing.

Yes. Then on the other side, there's also the idea that people can accuse other people, and it's like the culture we live in now is, if anything picks up steam with a bunch of people assessing and deciding that this is the truth, then it is just, it is what it is, regardless of it, a week or two later, or, or, or a fact. a month later or a year later, the facts come to light and it was all a lie. Everyone's already moved on and that's been stamped on that person. And they got a red letter and then that's just the court of public opinion and all this. I think we're entering a time of mindfulness. I know I

love my kids, but I also found the first five years of parenting, I thought I was the first parent on the planet. Right? So I was like, we're doing this. It's this new concept, this method or this thing. Which is normal. Like, it's normal for people who are especially overachievers in some way or they want to achieve something to overdo it. I'm very open to the idea that I probably overdid it the first few years of parenting because I was really trying hard because I had no model. Well, you try to, I think about it. I don't have kids. I don't think, I don't plan on having kids.

But I'd think about it in the way like, oh, I would love to like break the cycles, you know? And then you're like, well, it would be pure vanity to have a kid just for that reason. But it's like... My perfect little experiment. I could see myself going overboard in that way. I go overboard about everything. So like I got one way. When we're apples from the attic tree, we fall off that tree, we have all the tendencies

that I may not be an alcoholic, but I certainly have the tendencies. I certainly have an addictive person out. And I have an addictive personality. I can get addicted to anything. Yeah, me too. So we're likely very similar. That's probably why our music resonated with you. Yeah.

Not just your experience with not having a dad. I think that's the starting point, right? When you find someone who shared a similar experience and they speak of it in simple terms that you can understand and relate to. There's a kindredness there that like, I think good sharp. Charlotte had a very, it has a very simple, honest approach to like how we say things. Yeah, yeah. And I think that was a function of us not having a lot of time to develop.

We literally just came out. That's, that's, to me, I talk about it a lot with trying, like, I think that it's like the cool guy thing to really, like, censor yourself to like, you just put dirt and dirt and dirt over the true meaning of something so that you don't ever have to be held accountable to what that expression is. And when things are stated plainly, there's nowhere to hide. There's nowhere to hide. And I prefer that way. Like, I wish that people talked about lyrics more because then I'd be like, oh, shit. You know, like, I want to be on my heels and be like, well, I said that and I was hoping nobody would ever ask about it because I can't think of a way to hide

it or whatever, you know, and like, yeah, I don't know. I respect the, I just think that like in my early stages of being into music and then getting into like punk and hardcore like in the like more obscure sense the more pretentious sense um cool guyness really got in the way of of expression. I think about a lot of the records that I first came up with in their way that they were speaking is so much more like what I still connect to rather than a lot of those like really gnarly punk records because they're covering up what they're trying to say by being whether I mean a lot of this shit is just like traditional. Like, you know, like the stabbed in the back song and all that shit, you know, like,

which never has really done too much for me. But it's like, oh, the records I originally liked had so much more emotional depth. And then I went away from that for like pretentiousness to some degree. Yeah. How old are you? 32. Okay. So I'm a lot older than you.

But at your age, you're still so young, but you're old enough. The next 10 years is prime. Yeah. to make like really good decisions and do good shit, I think. I hope. Yeah. I think so. And you seem super clear and focused and like aware of everything.

It's cool. I mean, but then at the same time, you know, you get two wrapped up in one thing and other things start falling apart. So it's like, you know, I don't claim to be on top of it because I could be better about a lot of things. Yeah, so could we all. Okay. Anyway, I got, I wasn't going to bring up family stuff for you and you can cut this.

No, yeah, no, yeah. Do you guys watch the holiday? Because we watch the holiday every year. Yeah, yeah. You do watch it? Yeah. Every year? Yeah.

Yes. Okay, cool. Yeah. Because I was like, I was like, think about it. I was like, we watch this damn movie every year, but I was like, if that's your family member, would you want to watch the movie with your family member in it? Like, would that be weird or not? Uh.

So many classics, but then they're in your family and you're like, I talk to them every day, like, and then they're acting. Yeah. There's so many classics, but I guess, you know, I've, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I've been with my wife now for just about 18 years. There's so many people around us that make art at a high level. Yeah, yeah. And it's pretty easy to separate it out and enjoy.

For me still, it's easy to enjoy a movie. I have a lot of friends who are like actors and actresses and stuff that are like big time. I can still watch the art and enjoy it. I'm really, really good friends with Zoe Soldano. Okay. and her husband. And she's just like the number one sci-fi woman in the world. Yeah.

Avatar, Avengers, Star Trek. Like, when you think of like big sci-fi franchises, she's like the go-to for a character. And she's phenomenal. It's easy for me to like watch her movies. She also looks different enough, luckily. She does like, yeah. Cam is different because Cameron is very Cameron.

So the character you love that you see in something about Mary or in the holiday or in any of the movie she's in, that is really kind of her. Okay. So there's something really charming about that. But then there's a side of her that you don't see in the films sometimes. I think that she's kind of like super gangster. Okay. Like I said this somewhere else, but like she would be my first call.

If someone was going on. If I was in trouble. Yeah, nice. Like she's like a go. She will figure. shit out. She drives like a fucking NASCAR driver. She knows how to do. So all the movies she's done that are action. She learned all that stuff. So she really does know like how to fight martial arts, how to use a gun. All the trainings she's done for movies. She works with real people that do these

things. And so she's like a very like capable, competent person. Yeah. And when you think about like, me and my wife talk about this. Like if you thought about, and my brother is super competent as well. Like he's kind of like, he's a, he's a pretty tough guy. Um, and, and nothing kind of shakes him. So if there's ever a problem, he's the one that of all of us that's like, here's what we're going to do. She's kind of the same. So they, they're like a good match.

Benching cam. Okay. They will literally on horseback. They, they could come on horseback. Yeah. They could ride horses. I'm terrified of horses. Yeah.

They could get on a horse with guns and like ride in somewhere and like, and handle. So it's a super, like, I don't give it enough credit. It's a super calming force in our family. Yeah. Because there is something about those two, and especially Cameron, that's just very handled. Like, they can handle it.

But, no, it's not weird. It's, if anything, it's just, it's endearing. It makes you, like, you see the person that they're playing. And I believe this about a lot of great actors. There's qualities. about them as a person that they bring into the role or the on screen. And we all love them. And it's not just the character we love. Yeah. It's something about that person. Yeah, the magnetism. The magnetism, the charisma and the specialness. Yeah.

That is hard to quantify. It's hard to nail down why we love someone. Yeah, yeah. At our best, as people, we all have the potential for special. But somewhere in the growth, you got to... I'm gonna... And, like my music, my hair, can be able to be able to continue my rhythm. For so, Potion Nine, of Sebastian Professional, has all what my hair needs.

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come around to recently is I see the specialness in so many people and I really kind of

I feel like at one point was overboard and like anyone can do this, anyone can do this

and then you learn not anyone can not anyone can it's really a choice that they make to have to work hard

enough to do it and so like think about with trying to help other artists, you know, gain audiences and stuff. And it's like, well, if you won't do the work, then you can't do it. And I can't live your career for you. So it's on you to do it. You cannot help someone that will not help themselves. Yeah. We all have to take responsibility for our own life. Like you're saying with, with mistakes. Yeah. This is the thing I like about AA. And I would say I mostly like most things about AA. Yeah, yeah. But coming up, in that world. My dad left when I was young. You know that from the songs. And then coming back to

knowing him later in life who he had not resolved. Oh, so I don't know about that for. I'd love to hear more about that. So we reconnected when I had kids, a couple years after I had kids. I found him, reached out. It was great. We reconciled and we made amends in all the ways we could. But he never worked out his addiction. And I think from birth to death, our job is to make sense of it and evolve forward and become the better version, the higher potential. And we all are given the potential to do it. But then we all have to choose it, right?

Yeah. And that's where the responsibility comes of self, taking action towards it every day and trying to figure it out, which I think is the simple process. Yeah. It's complicated when you get into it, but it's simple. Go forward every day. Aim up. Try to go up.

And if we put forth effort, we get results. Yeah. Well, and the other thing is like you're talking about like accepting it as, accepting the bad is just like the reality and that's it. But like I'm at my, even early on, I was like, oh, all this like fucked up shit that's happened is like what is making me smart. It's what's making me better. It's what's making, you know, like, I, like, am grateful for it to whatever degree to be, like,

I got perspective due to this. I got, you know, like, my emotional intelligence is due to this. Like, whatever, like, all these things are due to, like, the bad things. And overcoming that is why I'm here. But somewhere in your, like, formative years, you had something where you got the inkling that trying was worth it. And then you tried and something came of it that told you. Clicked.

Yeah. That was worth it. There's something. And then you kept, it's like the road unfolds as we walk. Yeah. And some people somewhere get paralyzed around certain issues and everyone's is different. Some people, it's relationships. Like I said, some people, it's health.

Some people it's work. Some people it's money. But yeah, so when I reconnected with my dad, we had a really nice friendship. It's good. And there were two reasons for that, I think. he was older and he had lived and had come to realize and accept certain things. And I was older and I had lived and I saw him more as me. And I have a very, I don't know what the word is for it, but I have a very kind of,

maybe it's realistic, but I really don't think there's such a thing as perfect. I just think, I don't think there's a perfect marriage or perfect parents. So I came to understand like the natural, the natural side of just like what it means to actually just be a biological parent. And that none of us exist without our biological parents, regardless of their imperfections. There's a grace kind of we have to have with, doesn't mean it's okay.

They're mistakes. Those are theirs. Yeah. And they did affect us, hurt us, shape us. So I'm not necessarily throwing those away. Those actually have meaning. But I'm accepting that that person is also, missing out.

Yeah. On what it means to have a relationship with an incredible person that is your child and the endless treasure that can come from having a relationship like that, from my experiences, endless joy and experience and fun and all the different things. It definitely gives you depth. Something I find is interesting, two different things, which is, one, passing through ages that your parents were. Yeah, yeah.

And acknowledging where they were and where you are. I'm sure that you had that like, totally. Because at some point you have to go, what year, how old is my dad when he left? Yeah. You know,

and like I think about my parents. I'm like, how old are my parents when they, when my mom got pregnant? Like, 24? You know, like that's way younger than I am now at this point.

Like, I couldn't think of as a 24 year old going, like having a kid, fucking scary concept. Yeah. The other thing that I think about a lot is with, specifically with my mother, who I have like the best relationship with,

but, you know, she was a constantly relapsing alcoholic and had a lot of issues. And but at the same time, so like a lot of what is the most scarring to me, basically she wasn't there for. You know what I'm saying? Like she was blacked out. She was, you know, like in a binge where it's just like you don't have that awareness. And so it's like could could me like me recounting all the things that hurt me to a person that doesn't remember that they happened? Like it's like, it's like, it's, forgiveness to you about, you know, making someone else feel bad or forgiving it so you can move on from it and forget it. And so as I've gotten older and, you know, quite a while ago now at this

my mom's been sober for quite a while. But like, you know, like I once tried to tell her a story of like something that happened and she was like, I don't remember it. You know, and that was like a heavy realization. Like, oh, the things that you'll never remember, the things I'll never forget. And and that just made me go like, okay, so this is about me and me forgiving things for my own sanity. Yeah. You know, and like I try to talk about it with the band. And I talk about it on stage of like the concept of mistakes.

And like first and foremost, like you have to do the work to get through a mistake. Second is like you forgive someone else for your own sanity, not for like really anything to do with them. Someone could still be on the same path, doing the same bad things. But if you forgive them for those past things, you'll feel better. in your own life and and be able to conduct yourself the way that you hope to without carrying the weight of like something that's going to explode eventually or crop up in another relationship. Or you'll repeat. Yeah, exactly, exactly. I think we tend to either repeat or heal. So we either become our parents and repeat the patterns. And there's probably some patterns we repeat. Oh, yeah,

definitely. Hopefully we're keeping, hopefully we're getting rid of most of the, of the dysfunction, right? but it's definitely not the case we definitely have things we're going to have to work out in real time because like my relationship with my wife has been very telling it's been the source of things to work on yeah and thank god she's cool as shit yeah yeah because she's got such a good sense of humor about life and she went through all her own stuff being adopted and going through the life she had she's set up to understand the life yeah yeah So it doesn't have to be perfect for her. Thank God.

It's been the source of things to like, it's revealed me, like who I really am. Yeah. And then that's the source of the shit I've been able to work on. Were you ever straight-edge? Yeah, yeah, straight-edge for a long time. Not straight-edge anymore. Okay, me either. I didn't drink until I was 30.

That's probably a good thing. Yeah. Now you probably just drink some fine wine or something. I mean, I definitely drink more than I should, but, you know, this is the fucking the tour lifestyle, you know? It's like, I remember on these past couple tours, I don't, this is either sad or not, I don't know, but you're like, I'm not going to drink today. And then you're like, then, then load in is done.

You finish soundtrack and you're like, a lot of hours. Yeah. Lot of hours. How do I eat this up? And then you're like, I'm just going to start talking. Fuck it. I drink at least one drink before I, I have to to get on stage. Yeah.

The only way to get those nerves. For me, my nerves start to peak. about two hours before. Yeah. And then I'm like, I need a drink. And I'm just, that's just the fact.

That's just how it is. I'm sure people out there could say, you should work on that. If someone says need, you're like, you're like, ah, but no,

I mean, I was there yesterday. We, we did this thing at Brain Dead and we, like, made this documentary and we did an acoustic performance beforehand.

I love Brain Dead. And I do too. And, and then a Q&A after it's, and it was just like, I was terrified. I hate doing the, I don't hate it.

I like doing the acoustic stuff, but it's like, nerve-wracking. It's a little different, you know? A small crowd. Yeah, it's such you're naked. Yeah. And so I like literally just like walked down to Genghis Cohen and I took a shot and

then came back because I was like, there's no booze at the venue. So I was like, all right. Yeah. Get loose. You know, it is. Sometimes it is what it is. Do you ever step back and think how fucking amazing it is that you're the singer for military gun and not some like hillbilly convict, drug,

addict, drunk, because I'm looking at you and we come from similar places, right? Yeah, yeah. So if I take my hat off and I put on a different outfit, you could go like, oh, that guy's a redneck from Southern Maryland who got into all kinds of trouble. And this didn't work out and that didn't work out. And I could be a, I could be drunk somewhere not doing what I'm doing now, which I think is being a productive member of a community. Right.

Yeah. And certainly I know lots of people that did. didn't do what I'm doing. And so I have a real felt sense of what that other potential could be. And I do go, man, thank God for whatever reason I got on the path I got on and I kept going. Yeah. And all these years later, I'm sitting here in this chair talking to you. Another guy who's on another positive path, a productive, positive path towards more and more.

Yeah. Of everything. Of life, of love, of productivity, of creating things. of positive things. It's generative versus degenerating and not positive. And I look at you and I go, man, we're, they're sliding doors. Yeah.

You could be some guy somewhere causing trouble. Well, we, well, I have it as more of a direct mirror in my life with my brother going through what he went through. Right. And a huge part of like what I wonder always is like, why did I do this and why did he do that?

Yeah. And that's personal choice, is really the thing. Again, like, I was a nerd in the fact that I was like so steadfast in my like pursuit of music and like to the point where like I literally didn't care that I didn't have friends in high school, you know, where his perspective was different and he ended up down a different path. But now, luckily through all of that, like we get to do music together and he lives here and he's like living a better life and aspiring to his own heights with music. And I mean, me at the same time like it's so much of what military gun we had the song let me be normal which like

is just saying like I at the end of the day like I want to be normal but I never will be I'll always be like white trash I'll always be that they'll always be the little poke in your side as the reminder because like no matter what the people's temperaments I deal with in my family are not that of well-balanced people you know what I'm saying like not and not and that's not a dis it's just like we're all kind of fucking crazy and we've all been through crazy shit and so there always will be no matter how much money success clout whatever the fuck it is i'll always be that but that's also the reason why i'm here you know like uh it's it's the same thing as you know Kanye west said uh bipolar isn't my uh disability it's my superpower and it's like kind of the same thing or it's like

all this shit is my superpower like going through that and living through it and like having to reassess and change and constantly, you know, like that's the superpower. And so it can be. I think as long as we're continuing to constantly take action towards the good. Yeah. And to acclimate our thoughts towards the good. Because there's always going to be a little voice that questions the good. Yeah. It's poking the reality. It's poking the, is this real? Can we count on this? There's a little. little voice in your head that's trying to protect you from disappointment because disappointment for us, our worst fear was becoming that. That was our worst fear. Our worst fear was actually our reality.

That's the crazy part about it. Our reality was so bad. I don't care what anyone says. Oh, yeah. It was so bad and it was so real that we started running away from it without even a plan. And then as the thing started to formulate and we found the opportunities, we attached our ideas of success around these opportunities. This is the big complication I have with Good Charlotte. It's not that I fucking love this band. This band made me. We started in high school.

These guys saved me. We're like a family. We've been together for 28 years. I'll never be in another band like this. But my complication around it is that I attached all my self-worth, all my idea of good around the success of that. one thing. And that's not reality. Reality is a successful life is a diverse life. It's a good relationship. It's good experiences in your everyday life. It's success around a business like

your band or your company or whatever you're doing. It's all these different things. It's a very rich. Yeah. And so I had to learn the success of the band is good, but it can't be the only thing. Yeah. I think I'm struggling with that currently because it's like the, you know, know, like the work is nonstop. Yeah, yeah. You know, and it's self-appointed. Yeah, yeah. And so you're like...

But you're also in that part of the arc. Yeah, and it's hard, but you at the same time, it's like, yeah, I should be a better boyfriend. I should be a better brother. I should be a better, you know, like, there's so many things I could be better at because I'm letting other things be under... I'm not watering all my plants the same, you know? And so you're like in real time knowing that there's a problem, but like also not

knowing the, like, way out of the dynamic. that I'm currently in, but I see that as a thing where it's like, I need to be better. And nothing's perfect, though. You've got to make hay while the sun shines and you got to do it while you can. But I really think that we naturally, like, kind of will grasp a concept and then we start acclimating towards it without thinking about it. So I think that, like, the subconscious and the subconscious part of us is actually the

bigger part of us. So the conscious part of us, I was listening to a really interesting thing the other day where this doctor was saying that, like, literally about 4% of us is the conscious part. And the 95% or 6% of it's almost like 5% of us is conscious. The other 95% is all unconscious. So if we can just grasp a fleeting thought and grab it and actually hold it for a long enough to understand and then let it go,

we'll actually start to acclimate unconsciously towards it. Yeah, subconscious. But I do think that like at the very beginning, it was our guidance system out. Just run far away from me. So we start running. But now when you get far enough where that's not your reality anymore,

so I can no longer say that I don't know what it's like to not have enough to eat or to not, you know, to need a dad to talk to or none of that really matters in my reality now. I now have to readjust

my fear about that reality because it's not really a realistic fear. Yeah, yeah. I'm too far away from it. So this thing I wanted to, I wanted to tell you because we were talking about it, but I tried this thing. So I was on,

I was fucking around with chat GPT. And there's a prompt you can give it to say, okay, talk to me as if you're any given psychologist, Freud or like motivational person, Tony Robbins, right? So talk to me as if you're Tony Robbins and give me advice about, if I ask questions.

and then I entered questions like, I'm worried about this. Every single response, and I learned kind of like the methodology of these people, right? Is getting you, like the Tony Robbins one I used, every single response was basically, I understand that,

what could you do to take action towards your goal? Or what could you do to make sure that doesn't happen? What could you do? And every single response was basically, take action towards what you want. So there was never a response that was like, don't worry, that won't happen. Yeah, yeah.

It was more every single response to any fear or worry or problem that I presented, the response was take action towards what you want. And I took that away as like a basic principle of like all these people, these guru type people that are helping people get the lives they want. I think that's a big selling point in the world today is everyone's looking for a person they think they can follow.

Oh, yeah. Because they're afraid that they're not enough and they need someone to advise them. So they find these people. Now, I have no problem with the Tony Robbins of the world. I love them all. They've commercialized something really good. But what I learned is essentially what they're telling people to do is believe in themselves and take action towards what they want. Yeah, yeah.

Every single time. It's kind of the same thing with therapy where it's like they basically ask you like, well, they're just holding a mirror up and then asking you a question for you to answer for yourself. You know, and it's like it's the same thing. It's like, well, if you're afraid of this, what can you do to? Yeah. And it's like, and the prompts were like, could you name three things you could do towards that goal? And then you'd name three things.

And then the prompt would be and then the response to that would be, those are great ideas. Which one could you do first? Yeah. Then you name it. And then they're going, okay, that's a great idea. what will be the first thing you do to do that. And it's like all about getting you toward to action. Yeah, yeah.

And thought around forward, not looking back, being worried. I thought that was interesting. Yeah. This is kind of like therapy. Yeah, yeah. This is my therapy. It's a good conversation. Yeah.

What's next for a military gun? Well, we just did this documentary thing where we went to Atlanta and collaborated with Manchester Orchestra. That's super cool. I love them. Yeah, dude. And he performed a, with us last night.

They seem cool. Dude, they're so awesome, so generous. I mean, like, our label hooked us up together and then... What label are you on? Loma Vista. Oh, yeah, cool. And then, yeah, they just, like, we're like, I think you and Andy will get along really great.

And then we did, you know? And it's been amazing how generous they've been and how much they've done. We're going on tour together. But yeah, we're doing that. And then, you know, we've Coachella these next two weekends, which is going to be interesting. And then we're just, like, on tour the rest of the year.

You're trying to write the next record, but we're always on the road, always busy. So just trying to... Have you written anything yet? Oh, tons. Cool. I have like 20 songs, but... Sick.

I mean, that's enough for a record. Yeah, we don't got it yet, though. Yeah, okay. Don't got it yet. You know, trying to get up to maybe like 30 songs, edit it down and then figure out like a like a sequence. I like an album to be like a full thing. And I think of like a track nine, which is like the dip before the ending climax.

Yeah. Yeah. And so it's like, you know, I'll get far enough and then I'll start building a sequence. and then where needs a type of song. And so I'm excited to get, I'm far from that currently, but I'm excited to get to that point of being like, let me build a structure. Right now it's just, you know,

I'm just getting all the pieces together and then I'll build a structure later. That's cool. One of my best friends is this guy, Matt Coma, who was actually just on the show. I've met Matt. Matt's a great producer. Our guitar players worked on a bunch of Winnetka stuff.

I worked on a Winnetka video at one point. You worked on a video. Yeah, yeah. That's what he said. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So he wouldn't remember when I did it because I was just running the PA for playback on the one where they're in the...

No, no. He told me. Okay. He told me that he worked with you guys. Yeah. Well, so he, but he more recently hung out and worked with our guitar player. He said he worked with both of you. So he remembered.

Nice. Okay. Low key, really good producer. I was on, I honestly was listening to the episode with him on the way in. And I was like, I was like, I don't know. I feel like maybe doing a session with him would be cool. To be honest, he's the kind of guy too that like he's, he's very understated in like his own capability.

Yeah. Because he's not an ego guy. Yeah. So he doesn't come into this like, I'm a genius and he kind of is, but knows music and live music and instruments and like, I would say doing a session with him even just to see. I want to do songwriting sessions with people just to be like to see someone to take raw

materials and elevate them or they go left one and go to right. and if that's a good thing. Like, I want to do that type of stuff. You know who else is like, doesn't work a lot because he, he started a company and he runs this publishing company, but he's still an amazing rock producer is Josh Abraham. Okay. You just check out his, go check out his records he did back in the day.

Yeah, yeah. Because he did some big rock records back in the day. And he doesn't fuck with the band. Mm-hmm. The band stays the band. He just hears, he hears choruses really well. He hears guitar tones really well. I mean, I don't even know how many records he's producing. He still produces here and there,

but he's an OG OG rock guy. Yeah. And it would be interesting to see you guys with a rock producer like that. Yeah, definitely. I feel like this, as long as you stay you and you trust yourself to be you, yeah, all you want is a partner who's going to make the best sounding record. Definitely. You know what I mean? Like you want the drums to sound the best they can. You want the guitars to sound great. And you want someone that cares about the whole song and the whole record. And I feel like you'll meet with someone and you'll get an inkling. Yeah. And you'll be like, did I feel that?

I feel like, I feel like there's something here. You got to make sure that you leave room for you to have the feelings that you're going to have the same way that that same guidance system got you here. Yeah. Well, I always embrace the moments where I know that I can't be myself. Yeah. Like I know, like, dude, Isaac Brock called me on the phone. And I was like, I was like, I can't, I didn't know.

Like, I was on my heels the whole time. I was like, I am not myself in this phone conversation. That is not me that he spoke to. Yeah, yeah. He spoke to like a timid, weak person. Yeah. Like, couldn't be himself because Isaac Brock is so himself, you know, and you're like, so, you know. That's a good thing to know, though.

Yeah, yeah. Well, I just know when I'm, you know, if I'm in the defense position. I've never thought about that. Like, it's the same thing we're talking about lying. Like, defensive, you know. like those like mistruths might slip through in that defensive moment to be like because I'm censoring myself because I'm like I just said something like we're talking about these songs and I was like oh I don't think you really care for this song much and then he's going into talking

about how I shouldn't doubt myself and I'm like but that's not what I'm saying I'm saying I love my song saying you wouldn't like it like it's two different things but he that that miscommunication led to like him over explaining things and then I'm like then I'm censoring my what I'm going to say next. I never thought about that. That's really good. It's almost like we send out our representative and they're either overselling or underselling. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Like they're either lying or they're not telling the truth. Yeah. You know, like instead of us showing up and being ourselves. It's hard to always show up, you know, like, especially when there's other big personalities. That's like where you're like, you start quelling yourself to make room for the other people, which you should do at times, but it's like you have to do it in a

truthful and sincere way, and it's hard to know what the difference. Yeah. That's why I like doing this show. It's forced me to more and more and more be more me every time. Yeah. Because I get really, I have a, I have a tendency to want people to like me. It's just my natural tendency. Singer of a band, it adds up.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And so it's not that it's dishonest, but I, like you said, I won't share completely sometimes and here I kind of have to. Yeah, to carry the thing. Yeah. And if you're sharing, I have to share. I have to meet you where you, wherever you are in this conversation. It's interesting. With you, I did not expect this. I didn't know what I expected. I was open. But you came in and you were open. And so I have to meet you there. Yeah, yeah. And some people aren't. Some people are not ready to be there or they're coming in looking at it like it's an interview. So,

It's not really an interview, and it's not really, at the end of the day, we are promoting things, but this isn't really like a front-facing promotional tool. This is a place for people to get to listen in on conversations that we might have backstage or if we met at a party or at a dinner, we might have this conversation or some version of it, right? You really have to be comfortable with yourself to sit in this chair and talk. and like i understand when people aren't aren't there but this show has forced me to get more and more comfortable in my own skin yeah and just be okay with that like with the truth of me i was talking

about it last night because we you know we just did this whole fucking documentary thing yeah screening and people are watching me on a movie screen it's weird and um i get really hung out i i smoke weed at the end of every day yeah yeah which is me crumbling internally like it's like the anxiety of that is part of the process. Oh, yeah. Well, I have to literally tell myself, I'm like, people like you because you're weird. It's like, if you were normal, you would not be remarkable to the, but then I get so in my head about like everything I've said and done today because I'm like, you overshared so much.

You know, like, at the end of the day, I'm like, fuck, why did I say all those things? And, uh, but at the end of the day, you go, that's what endears people to you. It's like, because at the end of the day, I can't make this. It's not an affectation. I can't stop. Like, it's, it's like, I have to fucking unburden myself at every point. And then at the end of the day, I just have to sit in the shame of all the things I've said. You know what?

Someone said about, and it was an AA guy. He said, guilt is I did something wrong. Shame is I am something wrong. Oh, interesting. And so shame is the one to look at when we feel ashamed because I have the same experience. Well, shame is a huge part of the addiction process too. Like shame, like you wake up. up ashamed and then you start drinking again to get rid of the shame.

You know, like, it's true. But I think actually it's not that you're weird. Yeah. It's that you're just like me. That's why I like you. Yeah. Right? That's why your music is good.

Now the music makes sense to me because I like the music. Yeah, yeah. And now I have contacts to the person behind the song and I'm going, oh, no, I fucking knew I like the music because you say things in a way I can relate to. Yeah. But then you're, then you share that. and I go, now the people that you, the people like you, because that's how we all are at the end of the day. Yes. All of us. That's what I arrived at last night with my girlfriend talking to her.

Just like, we all feel these things, but not everyone's comfortable communicating them. And so as artists, we're the character they're playing to some degree that they can actually say what they think, the avatar, that people get to say and think what they feel because we kind of push the post out, you know, I'm saying? Like, we carry it that much further that they can like start that first step because we make them think this is normal to some degree to state and have these conversations. And the ones that are actually listening to it that care are relating to it. Everybody else doesn't fucking care. Yeah. No one cares. Yeah. Don't overthink it. Yeah. And I have to remind myself of that when I do something like, you did a documentary. It's very personal. You're opening up. You're letting

people see who you are and then everybody's watching it hmm oh oh like you know like that's what you feel right you're like but then you kind of got to go like no i'm gonna be me in any given moment yeah and i might say something wrong i might get it right i might over sell how great i am as a husband or a dad I don't know. In the moment, I'm going to say what I feel. Put it behind you and keep moving and let people judge because you had the courage or the guts to just be yourself, whatever that means. Yeah, yeah. And now everybody gets to stand around and look at it and talk about it.

There's the disconnect between what we are to people, which is a product and then who you are. And so you leave the product behind. Like this at the end of the day is a consumable, right? Yeah. We walk away from this and we left a consumable product. And it was what it was. And that was that. That is it.

But that's not who we are. We go and live a full life outside of it. Moment to moment, day to day on any given moment, I'm going to be me with context. To that moment. As it pertains to that moment. Yeah. And so like where we started, if we had context, we could judge the moment. The more mindful conversation is all of us analyzing that moment together.

more therapeutically, like, yeah, I guess I could have done that better. Yeah. I guess I could have said that. But at the moment, I didn't have the quick wits. No. Well, and it's like your decisions are not made by a panel. Yeah. You know, like, a panel is a great thing for review,

but that's different than the way that moment-to-moment decisions are made. So bringing it to the art to this next record, which I'm excited about it. Because I think military gun is one of the great emerging rock bands. it's a great time for rock music. I've been saying, like, there's these emerging bands. And in the next 10 years is going to be really exciting, great records. But we have to remember how you got here. And so find the balance of all the gut decisions,

but keep the aspiration of wanting to push, push, and be better. Keep that. That's a good aspiration. Be careful of the panel of experts. It's not that they're wrong, and it's not that they don't have something to, of value to offer, but you have to find the balance of your inner guidance system that got you here, and then the useful information you get from the experts. I think you're poised to make

the best record. I mean, the guide that I have, which I think will ultimately negate panel of experts, is that if I cannot, if I don't obsessively listen to it, it's not coming out. That's right. Yeah. If there's one, if there's a song that I'm not obsessively listening to, it's out. I'll make a, I'll bleed the record at the end of the day because if I don't like the songs. And that happened with the last one. There's a lot of songs that didn't make the cut because I didn't listen to them.

I think you're in the sweet spot. I think that you're going to figure it out. Thanks for coming on. Thank you for having me. This is awesome. Amazing. I hope you enjoyed today's episode of artist friendly. If you really liked it,

you can follow, like, subscribe to the show anywhere you listen to podcasts, Spotify, Apple, Amazon. We appreciate your support. And we'll see you next time.