Aware & Aggravated - 133. Love Bombing Lies, Addiction To Being Hurt, & Being Blocked By An Ex
Episode Date: June 17, 2024In this episode Leo talks about the topic of love bombing, addiction to being hurt by people and how to stop it, what to do when you feel no purpose for living, and so much more. 🎟️ TOUR TICKE...TS: https://events.seated.com/leo-skepi 😁 WWLD Submissions: https://forms.gle/sNtQjjwvXUisfdgh9 ✅ FOLLOW ME HERE: https://www.instagram.com/leoskepi https://www.tiktok.com/@leoskepi https://www.snapchat.com/add/leoskepi 👕 Clothing/Merch: https://leoskepicollection.com 📱 MY APP POSITIVE FOCUS Apple: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/positive-focus/id1559260311 Google: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.positivefocusapp&hl=en_US&gl=US&pli=1 🔒 MY PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT COMMUNITY https://m.facebook.com/groups/851294735925522/?ref=sharehttps://m.facebook.com/groups/851294735925522/?ref%3Dshare&exp=7ffb&mibextid=I6gGtw Business Inquiries: Leoskepiteam@unitedtalent.com
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Hi friends. So this episode came out a day late. You know how I always say recommit and
figure it out? Yeah, I got tested with that because I'm on tour right now and I brought
my podcast equipment with me to make sure I could record and not miss an episode because
I like to hit every Sunday and come to find out while I was traveling, the equipment was
damaged. So I had to rebuy some things and I'm very irritated about it, but I did what
I had to do. I have one day at home back in my apartment and I had to rebuy some things and I'm very irritated about it, but I did what I had to do
I have one day at home back in my apartment and I had to spend it buying equipment and recording an episode
So hi when I say I love you, I mean it I put my ass behind it
But this week we're gonna do what would Leo do because like I said, I'm on tour
I'm coming to Florida this week
So if you're watching this when it comes out my three shows in Florida
First is Orlando then we go to Miami and then we go to Tampa. And then I go to more places.
I'm almost done with the tour. There's nine shows left.
So if you want to get a ticket,
the link will be in the description where you can buy one.
I'm going through a lot of places.
You can look up where I'm going to be when I'm going to be there and I'll see
you if you get a ticket. But this week we're doing a, what would Leo do?
So let's just jump into it. I'm excited. These are my favorite episodes.
So the first person wrote in and said, love bombing.
No extra context, no extra nothing. What would Leo do? Love bombing. This is the perfect time
for someone to ask me about this because love bombing is a real hot topic on social media
recently. And I think a lot of people have it wrong. A lot of people think things are love bombing
when they're not. So this is going to hurt for anybody who's thinking that they're getting love
bombed.
People will treat you a certain way when they're getting to know you.
Some people pretend to be something they're not and then switch.
That's absolutely love bombing. We get that.
But a lot of people fail to take into consideration.
Some people while they're getting to know you act like they they like you and that is how they care for someone.
And then they don't just flip for no reason because they're trying to manipulate
you. Sometimes people figure out they don't really like you or they realize
they're not into you like that, or they lose interest.
And it doesn't mean that they love bombed you. It means they lost interest.
And that's what changed their behavior.
A lot of people go the manipulative route
and paint themselves in a certain light
to get you to like them and to get you attached to them.
That's actual love bombing when it's a manipulation tactic.
But I see a lot of people messing it up
and assuming everyone's just trying to manipulate them,
you have to entertain the idea
that maybe they just lost interest in you.
I know that's so bad to say, and I know it's hard to hear,
but just because someone treated you good
and then stopped treating you good,
they could be love bombing you,
or they could have lost interest.
You can assess that for your situation, how you want it.
I just wanted to give my two cents on this
because everybody's running around saying,
love bombing this, bombing that babe. You really think like you
on such a high horse that people couldn't just lose interest in you. Maybe not everyone's
just trying to manipulate you and get you attached to them. Oh my God. That kind of
seems rude, but like it's the truth. You wanted my take on it. So that's it. As that's the
situation. Some people are trying to manipulate you and some people just lost interest.
And it doesn't mean they love bombed you. They just don't fucking like you.
So that's what Leo would do. It's assess it for what it is. All right.
The next person wrote in, I'm going to sum it up because it was really long.
They basically said they keep having their partner fuck up.
Like their partner keeps doing things wrong and they're tired and
they feel bad for pointing it out. And this is a topic I've considered doing an entire podcast
episode on, which is an addiction to being hurt by people and how your brain will find comfort
because it's a subconscious manipulation tactic to get people to act the way that you want.
When you constantly see people hurting you
and doing things wrong and letting you down,
it gets exhausting and it becomes uncomfortable
and it's just like pain everywhere you look.
But everyone's not disappointing you.
Everyone's not fucking up.
And your partner is probably sick of hearing it,
feeling like they can't do anything right.
But you have to see what you get by seeing how people do things wrong or do things bad
with situations like this with a partnership and in a relationship.
If you just keep seeing what's wrong, something that I used to deal with, and I had to break
this on myself is being addicted to being hurt by people because I liked how people
treated me
when they were making up to me and your brain will kind of see,
okay,
if people treat me good when they're making up to me,
your brain is going to constantly look for things they're doing.
They need to make up for.
So what you're going to be trained to see is how they're fucking up and how
they're doing things wrong. So you have something to hold over them.
It's like you get the upper hand and you get to put your foot on their neck
because they're trying to prove themselves to you.
But the issue is you will confuse liking this person for who they are with liking
how they treat you when they're making up for something.
So do you like how the person treats you when it's 50 50 when it's equal and they're just being genuine with you?
Or do you only like them when they're behaving in a way that they do when
they're making up for something and when they're trying to get back in good
graces with you,
that's something to clock yourself on and that's something you can get trapped
in mentally. And it was a bitch for me. It was a real pain in the ass,
but that's something to become aware of is are people doing things wrong all the
time?
Or do you benefit by seeing everything going wrong because it gives you something
to hold over their head and it puts them in a lower position and you like how
they treat you when they're trying to fight back up and get back to neutral.
That's just something to reflect on and look for. Because it, like I said,
turns painful when all you see is that people do things wrong and how they do things bad
and everybody's a disappointment. Most people aren't. But if you benefit from this dynamic,
you will be blind to seeing what they do right because you benefit by having them in a lower
position when they're making up for things. Does that make sense? Okay, cool. Glad we
all get it. Okay, the next person said, oh God, I'm not sure how it is in the male gay community,
but with women, there's a stereotypical role that a mask slash stud is expected to fill. Acting hard
and emotionless pretty much and not being expressive. Basically like a man. I tend to
suppress my actual personality to fit in that stereotype
so I could be more socially accepted as a mask.
Pointers on how to be myself without shame.
Men are just like you.
They're all needy, they're all bitchy,
and they're all whiny, especially straight men.
Straight men behind closed doors
do not fit the stereotype
that they all portray outside
in public.
Straight men are the biggest baby back bitches.
They're like to be coddled and babied and tucked in at night and they like to be like
a child.
And a lot of women, straight women in today's society feel like men are babies because that's
how they act.
Outside you see a certain stereotype. Behind
closed doors who people are actually dating is the little toddler in these men. So I don't
want you to feel like there's this pressure to be a certain way. What people like the
most is when you have duality and you have contrast. Like me, for example, I'm not the
typical gay by any means. I don't do any of the stereotypical shit I don't act the same way as most gay people do like gay men
I don't fit the stereotype and I don't try to force myself to you will lose yourself when you try and
Force yourself to be something that you're not
People are gonna like the fact that you're expressive and you're not the typical
Stud who's always trying to be a hard ass a lot of lesbians are uncomfortable to be around because you feel how hard they're trying
to put on a certain image.
My advice is never try to put on an image.
Be who you are, do what you wanna do,
express yourself and be fun.
That aspect of your personality
is what people are going to cherish
and appreciate the most.
People don't typically like the stereotypes
and a lot of people feel uncomfortable
and a lot of people can feel and sense when you're forcing
something or trying to control perception. So cut that shit out.
What you have to offer as fully being you as a lesbian is what is going to get
you loved and appreciated.
When I was trying to be a certain way and not just be how I am,
it was a shit show. It was just weird. And everybody felt it.
And I felt it and I felt very disconnected.
As soon as you embrace the duality in you, you can be a masculine lesbian but not have
to be a straight man.
You don't have to take on those characteristics.
You can fully be yourself and you don't want to fit a stereotype because those people are
replaceable.
People who fit in and people who go by the societal norms of doing
things a certain way. Nothing special about them. They're a dime a dozen. Is that the right term?
Like there's a lot of them. Like is that the right term? A dime a dozen. Is that how you use that?
Like there's plenty to pick from. You want to be the needle in a haystack. You want to be the
little special one who doesn't follow what everybody else does. You don't want to be a follower.
You want to be yourself and make your own mold of who you are and how you are.
And you're allowed to express yourself and have your sexuality be what it is and
not have one dictate the other. Just because I'm gay,
doesn't mean I have to wear makeup and wear rainbow shit and be
flamboyant as hell. I'll siss it up with you here and there,
but I don't cater my entire personality and force it to be what other people are
typically in the gay community. One thing I don't engage in is hookup culture.
I don't like that shit. That's my personal thing,
but you're faced with a choice.
You can force yourself to not be yourself and go by what gets you accepted.
You're never going to feel good in life.
You're never going to find real connection.
You're never going to like yourself.
That's the thing.
Based how you are and who you are and what you express and don't express, based that
on how you feel about it and if you like yourself and not, are people going to like this about
me?
I'm trying to be what everybody wants me to be.
That's never going to get you nowhere.
Trying to be what you're not will never get you loved.
And if you do get loved for it,
you're never going to feel loved because it's not you.
It's like putting a wall in front of yourself and this shell gets love.
You don't get it. It doesn't penetrate through the shell. You don't feel it.
So my advice is don't feel trapped and limited by feeling like you have to be a
certain way.
You can be very tough and be a masculine person and still be expressive and be vulnerable and all that.
People know with me, I'm very expressive, I'm very emotional, I'm very vulnerable.
I'm also a fucking hard ass sometimes, I'm a little rude.
But I also take care of people and I love people.
I'm very gentle and I'm very loving and caring toward people.
But at the same time on the flip, I'll fuck your shit up in two seconds
and I have no qualms about it.
Things don't discount each other.
The fact that you're vulnerable
does not make you less masculine.
And the fact that you're gentle
does not make you less strong and less tough.
So throw that out of your head.
Cause I tried to do this whole thing.
I did this whole little dance for a while.
Just be you.
Cause that's what people are going to like.
They're not going to like this little fake facade and you don't want to ever put
on a facade too long because you start to feel trapped behind a wall of glass.
You feel like you can see out,
but no one can see in because it's stained from their side. You fucked it up.
You know what I mean? Like you put on an image too long and you feel just like
trapped inside of it. You feel like you're like riding around in your body.
Like what the hell?
No one can see in. No one can see what I actually feel or think or want.
No one can see me. You'll feel invisible.
You'll feel behind a sheet of glass that no one can see in.
So don't do that to yourself. Be you and take pride in the fact that you have
the balls to go against the grain and stand out. Standing out is a good thing.
It comes with a rejection,
but it comes with a way more intense level of appreciation
and your value will be recognized
as soon as you act in line with it.
Stop hiding it.
The way that you express things,
the way you communicate is valuable.
Like me, if I was just a hard ass
and I only wanted to be perceived as tough,
I wouldn't be sharing what I share,
but the way that I communicate is appreciated.
Does that make sense? Like don't hide it. Don't hide it at all.
Express yourself truly because the way that it is expressed through the vessel
you're in is going to hold a lot of weight. It's going to be different.
It's going to be perceived way better. And it's a special thing.
So don't cover that up.
Don't like dull out your life and like turn everything gray
because you feel like you have to be a certain thing. Be you. Do your thing. Okay. The next person said, how do you lead more with your heart rather than caring
so much about physical appearance, achievements, et cetera? I want to go back to leading with my
heart. My biggest piece of advice for situations like this kind of grounding yourself and what
really matters and having perspective is think back to the nights where you were alone in pain, crying on the floor like ugly crying and
you had nothing that would comfort you. You had no one. Think back to when you
questioned if you were going to make it through certain things and no matter how
dark it got, think back to it because when you were crying on the floor, what
mattered then? Did your physical appearance matter? Did being a different weight matter in that
moment? Would that have fixed the pain that you felt?
Would having more money have fixed that pain that you felt? No.
All these superficial things are nice in theory,
but if you really want perspective about what really matters, it's humans,
it's connection, it's love,
it's all the things
that we are and all the things that you can create and share that you cannot buy. It's
things you have to create and things you have to be. So that's my best advice for leading
with your heart is remember those moments and remember what would have comforted you
when you were at your lowest point questioning if you were gonna make it through things what mattered then and live your life based
off of that not
Appearance and money and weight and getting caught up in all that shit. You can care about it. You can definitely prioritize it
It's important to make sure you look how you want to look and you feel how you want to feel and everything's going good
You make a money. You're okay
That's all important too
but if you're in a place where you feel lost and you don't feel like you can
lead with your heart or you don't know how to think back to that and prioritize
those things that would have helped you way down deep in that pit of pain,
use that to lead your life for a little bit and then bring back in the
prioritization of the other things, the superficial things, because they're nice,
they're enjoyable. But everybody knows at prioritization of the other things, the superficial things, because they're nice, they're enjoyable.
But everybody knows at the end of the day, none of it matters.
Like if it comes down to defending someone I care about,
I don't care what I have on me, all the jewelry, I'll rip it off.
I'll get my face smashed. I don't care. The physical shit means nothing.
I'll throw all the money away to protect anyone I care about.
That's what matters. And you know that you have that,
but that's just the perspective that will help you tap into leading with your
heart and figuring out what to prioritize. So just think back to those moments.
What would have made you feel better when you was ugly crying on the floor and
make those things more important than buying stupid shit or freaking out about
the way you look. You're fine. All right. The next person said,
how to win a court case.
Um,
the thing I learned about representing myself in court a few times and winning
is if you are fighting a legal battle,
it does not matter the angle you fight from
with what is morally right and wrong and who's a better person and who's not a lot of people in court and in law shit,
try to paint the other person in a bad light to try and get under the emotions
of the judge.
What the judges are looking for is their screening for laws that have been
broken and damaged that has been caused by breaking the law.
If you can prove something was unlawful,
that is the goal.
That's how you win a court case is to show damages or show a law has been
violated that requires punishment. That's the thing you fight.
You don't fight the emotions. You don't fight who was better morally,
who cared more, who did more, who went,
it's about what was legally right and wrong.
There is no room for emotions in court.
You really will see how corrupt the system is and how
pathetic it is because there's no logic and reason. It's black and white.
So you need to paint it black or paint it white. Don't get it colored up gray.
Trying to bring emotions and feelings into it. Leave that shit out of it.
If you can prove a law was broken or something was done that was unlawful, you will win.
Fight that. Keep that in the back of your head. Don't get caught up in anything else. Prove
what needs to be proven. Feelings don't matter in court. Remember that.
All right. The next person, we're getting deep. They said, how do I deal with feeling like I have
no real purpose for life and I'm just
living for the people I love? That's okay. Sometimes.
I don't want you to stress out and freak out for feeling like you don't have any
reason to live, but for other people,
if that's what you need to keep going for a little bit, let it be that feeling.
Like you have to just be here for others is something that I've experienced.
Any reason that can keep you going, any purpose to stay here is a purpose.
Let it serve its purpose by being here and being useful.
You will experience new things.
You will change.
You will learn new shit.
You'll have new perspectives.
You will have new desires come up and you will feel a great sense of purpose eventually.
If you just need any sense of purpose, use what's there. Living for other people serves you right now.
Use that. Let that save you. It will guide you out of its embrace.
Once you are ready for it,
sometimes you just have to find any reason to keep going.
And that's a perfectly fine one of living for other people. Like I've said,
I've experienced it myself.
I've experienced it before I got like fame and all this shit.
And I experienced it again, after I started to blow up
and like how people start to care about me.
I had to live for you guys at certain points
you didn't even know.
And that can be okay.
That used to stress me out a lot too.
Like, oh my God, I need a purpose.
I need this, I need that, like freaking out.
What you need to keep in your head
is all you need is to keep going.
So what you need to feel like you're doing it for will change.
It will have, it will flow. It's going to grow.
It's going to alter itself by itself.
So don't stress too much about finding the right purpose.
Any purpose to keep going will lead you to the greater purpose.
So remember me saying,
do not stop and don't freak out that you feel like you just have to live for other people right now.
If that's enough reason for you to stay, stay.
You're not meant to go yet.
You need to stick around longer and be happy you have at least that because there are points
that might come where you're begging for any reason and just ride the wave.
There's always a reason to stay and don't critique it.
Don't get mad about it. Sometimes you just got to live for other people for a little bit,
but you will come back to you and you will find that purpose and you'll find
that little motivation again. It's coming. So don't stress. Just ride the wave.
Quick pause to talk about the sponsors of today's podcast.
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Now back to the podcast. All right. Next person said, dear Leo,
the guy I was in a relationship with left me because of my traumas.
I was in a relationship with a narcissist who abused me.
He knew my ex betrayed me in some ways,
but when I told him the whole story about the abuse, even though I healed,
he said it was too much for him. I was devastated.
And I've been struggling since three months now to accept it
because I am a victim in my former relationship and now he punished me for my wounds. And before that, everything seemed perfect.
And he used to say very often that he is there for me and will always protect me.
What would Leo do
for someone to say you're too much for them, it's okay.
What they're admitting is they're not strong enough to be with you and that's fine.
Or you don't line up with what they want out of his life or out of a partner.
Also you have to look at what you're reflecting to them and what is being challenged in their
perception of reality.
When I say challenge in their perception of reality, an example for me is a lot
of people say that when I talk about my past, I'm lying and it's a typical thing.
And I give people the grace of their ignorance when they say I'm lying about
things, because if you actually pay attention to the things that I talk about
from my past and things that I've been through to entertain the possibility
that what I've been through is true for most people,
it will wipe out any sense of safety they have in this world.
So to understand what I'm saying about what I've experienced
causes such a rupture. People have two options.
They can choose to shut their eyes and not see it and say, you're lying,
or they can face their entire reality being shattered.
Like when I talk about the justice system not being for you
and people are not gonna really help you
and you only have yourself to rely on most of the time.
Shit is not set up for you to succeed.
Shit is not set up for right or wrong, especially court.
There's so much corrupt.
Just, I don't want to speak too much on it, but the court system is corrupt. Politics are
corrupt as hell. Everything is corrupt. Nothing is actually looking out for the best interest of you.
And to entertain that thought makes you very unstable and very shaky with going forward if
you didn't know that before. So my example is that because people have to say
that I'm lying or they have to face the fact
that the world they live in is not as safe as they thought
and they don't know how to deal with that level of unsafety.
They don't know how to protect themselves.
It's a very terrifying feeling.
And when I didn't feel equipped and strong enough
to take care of myself in all ways,
this scared the shit out of me.
I didn't have a choice though.
I was experiencing it. There was no,
is it true? Is it not?
But when you explain things that you've been through,
he might be intimidated by how strong you are because you fucking made it.
But also it might make him scared of that person and he might feel less of a
man because of it.
And he might feel unable to protect you from things that he now realize exist.
So there's a lot of layers to it.
But my main concern is I don't want you getting insecure
because someone says you're too much for them or they can't handle things
about your past that you've been through or things that have happened to you.
It does change your brain.
And to deal with someone and try to date
someone who has experienced certain things like we have,
it's going to be a challenge. The way our brain works is very different.
Our awareness level,
our survival instincts are ingrained in our day to day life.
The way that we can evaluate situations and see shit that's not there,
the way we can weed through people's words and dissect lies and spot things immediately
is very scary to people.
It's gonna be very intimidating.
And the things that you feel
and the things that you've experienced
might cause a lot of feelings to come up
in the other person and they don't know
how to deal with them.
So you have to understand you're a mirror,
but you're also a person and I get that.
And it does not feel good for someone to say you're too much for them or for
something you've been through to put someone off.
But it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. You didn't choose this shit.
Things happen. And if someone is not strong enough for you, that's okay.
Let them go.
They need to go find someone who they feel like they're good enough for,
or sorry,
strong enough for and capable of being with.
But I do want to also point out, you know, I'm always going to fight for you,
but I will check you if I have to. Do you weaponize the shit you've been through?
Do you use it as an excuse? Well, this happened to me.
Like do you use it as justification to be weird or do fucked up shit? And you're just like, Oh, this happened to me.
So it's fine. Do you use things you've been through as justification?
That might be something that's off putting, but I don't think it's that.
It might just be the things that you've been through were too much.
And he realized he wasn't strong enough to be with you.
It does not mean anything is wrong with you. And you are unlovable.
You are not unlovable by any fucking means.
Nothing that has happened to you defines you.
It is not who you are at the core.
Your essence is very different and your essence is a light that will always
shine through. Do not question yourself for one second about this.
Be sad, be upset,
but do not attack yourself for someone not being strong enough to handle you and
handle the reality you make them face. That's not your fucking issue.
Like I said before,
give people the grace of their ignorance and give people the grace of their
weakness, not in a derogatory, like a mean way,
but understand there's nothing wrong with you and there's nothing bad about you
and what you've been through. Some people just can't handle it.
It's like if you give me a typical like golden retriever boy,
and you try and make us date, it's not going to go well.
It's not going to go right because we have very different survival adaptations
and behavioral strategies and emotional intelligence levels and just experience
and awareness of things, also different values and priorities.
But you wouldn't look at me and say, Oh, something's wrong with you.
It's fucked up. These things make you bad or make you like not good enough.
Like you should like knock yourself down a peg because you've been through
things. No,
you'd look at me and see all the things about me that are special and you,
you see me and I'm saying this because I want you to recognize that I recognize
the same thing in you. The things that you see in me, I see right back in you.
Any value you see in me is in you.
So you don't look at me like I'm bad and awful because of shit that I've been
through and things that I've experienced.
You just know that a certain type of person is needed to be a match to it and to
be able to handle me and be able to love me.
It's not that we're hard to love.
It's just a different depth of love
that we require because we can access it.
So don't question yourself once.
Do not question yourself one time about it.
Let them go.
Let them go.
Go find someone who likes all of you and can handle it
and isn't scared by you.
People who are scared and people who are chicken shits are not safe people to be
around because when people get scared,
they lose a lot of their character and they lose their mind. Basically.
Like if you ever want to see the truth of someone,
see how they treat people when they're angry and see how they treat people when
they're scared. A lot of people go into full self-centered, only consider myself mode when they're scared.
They don't think of consequences.
They lose the ability to think and be a critical thinker in times of stress and pressure.
That's one thing nursing taught me a lot about is critical thinking, being able to handle
the heat and handle the stress and still be task oriented, be scared shitless, Have someone dying in front of me and still have to think things through and make decisions.
There's no time to lay down and cry.
It takes a level of strength and emotional resilience and emotional discipline to be able to do that.
You have that.
I'm just pointing out things that you got because I don't want you to let this make you question yourself at all.
But people who are scared and people who are weak
have no business being in your life
if you've been through some shit.
If you're a strong person, you can't be around weak people.
You can't, it'll ruin you, it'll destroy you.
And everything will fall on you.
And also, be careful with people who are weak
because the level you're willing to fight for them,
they're not willing to fight for you like that because I'm the type person,
like I said, with the golden retriever boy analogy, if you take a normal kid, like a little white kid who's blonde hair, blue eyes, grew up in the suburbs, grew up with money,
parents love them, parents are still together, siblings and like a golden retriever and like
everything was perfect and you pair them up with someone like me and get us to care about each other.
I'm the type person when I care about somebody,
if a hundred people are coming at you, wanting to fight you,
a lot of people who are scared will run.
I'm the type person to see someone I care about.
I will come up next to you and face these hundred
people with you and fight until we die. That's how I am.
That's what I require is that level of strength, loyalty,
commitment and relentlessness.
And you have to get to it with a lot of shit. So you have this gift.
But my whole point with illustrating this is I require a type of person like
that. This dude is not like that.
This dude is the type to see you in trouble and run to secure his own ass.
I'm the type who will die next to you. If I love you,
I will do whatever I have to do. You're not going out alone.
If it's a hundred on one, if I care about you, it's a hundred on two.
And I don't care what happens. We'll fight till we die together,
but you're not dying alone.
That's something I require is people who think like that and act like that.
I don't like people who get scared and run.
That's where I'm saying strong people cannot be around weak people because I'll
be fucked if I'm in a situation. It's happened to me before.
I've been jumped and I've been the one standing there fighting and people who
were friends with me ran because they were scared. I don't like that.
That puts you in a very bad position when you're a strong person. friends with me ran because they were scared. I don't like that.
That puts you in a very bad position when you're a strong person.
You don't want to be let down like that. It's a heartbreak I never want you to experience. If someone is weak,
get them away from you. If you are strong,
do not be around people who are not also strong.
They have no business being around you and it will cause nothing but heartbreak.
So for my personal experience, watch your ass, but I hope this illustrated a lot to you and made you feel better and helps you
not question yourself. You're not wrong. Do not question your value over this for one
second. Do not question if you're lovable or not for one second about this dude. This
shit pisses me off, but you're more than okay. And the day you meet the motherfucker that can handle you and
the day you meet someone who can see everything and isn't scared and they stand there like, yeah,
okay. But I care about you. I like you still. I love you. I'm here for you. I've actually got you.
How he said, I'll always protect you and be there for you. Yeah, that was bullshit. Because as soon
as he got scared, he went back on the word. But the day you meet the person who looks at the entirety of you and isn't scared and
doesn't run, you will say to yourself, God damn, was it worth it?
Every weak person who made their way out, thank God they did because this was worth
it.
This is what I was being led to.
That's what's happened with me.
So it's going to be worth it.
Let the people that are weak weed
themselves out. They will go. They will scatter like cockroaches. Let them and do not question
yourself because they go. Okay. Uh, okay. Wait, next person. My ex has me blocked on Insta.
Is it weird for him to be bothered even if he has been dating someone for a year and a half?
He blocked me recently, not after we broke up, which is why it's weird.
What's more weird is a year and a half later, you're stalking him enough to know that he
blocked you.
That's what's weird to me.
He's in a new relationship and you caught that he blocked you immediately. Babe, really didn't for a fucking second. Honestly,
I don't think he's bothered and all of a sudden blocked you because he's
bothered about you. His new girl probably was like, get this bitch out of here.
Why do you still follow your ex? I'm like that.
If I start talking to somebody or I'm starting to date somebody,
why the fuck you following anybody you've fiddled and fondled with block them?
You don't got to block them, but I'm following them.
Like I'm pretty sure his new girl made him block you.
I don't think he's over here just so bothered about you. He had to block you.
But my main concern is why you still looking him up that much that you realized
he blocked you immediately, babe, don't you dad, let him go. He has to die to you so you can move on. Stop looking them up that much that you realized he blocked you immediately. Babe, don't do that. Let him go.
He has to die to you so you can move on. Stop looking them up.
It just hurts you more and more and it gives you a false sense of attachment.
When you lose someone and your brain can't handle it,
it's a way of falsely feeling still connected to them because you still feel a
sense of knowing what they're up to and seeing them and you still feel the weird
sense of connection. So cut that, stop looking them up
and let them go. It's going to suck. It's going to be hard,
but I have plenty of podcast episodes to get you through it about breakups.
All right. Next person said,
am I normal for not loving going out and drinking all the time?
Like I'm in my early twenties and a lot of people I know just want to go out and drink and I'd much rather just hang out and go to the beach or
watch a sunset or exercise or something. Um, you said, am I normal for not loving it? Who
the fuck determines what's normal and what's not normal? There's things that are more societally
acceptable and there's things that people do more of versus others. But for you to not like going out and drinking is very much normal.
I don't like it.
I used to love it when I hated my life and I was escaping things.
Yeah, I was partying. I was having a blast.
I like to go out occasionally here and there,
but people who go out every weekend, it's fine not to like that.
You're allowed to like whatever you like. If you don't like that,
you don't like that. It doesn't mean anything's wrong. It doesn't mean other people who do like it
are bad or wrong though. So don't be the person who doesn't like it and shames everybody else
because then you're an asshole. But if you just don't like doing these things and you
never spend your times in more meaningful ways, do it. Some people like their release
and the carefree and just go party, go forget the week, forget what's going on. Just go
have fun and socialize. A lot of people that's their social interaction and their carefree time. But it is a superficial sort of
interaction because you don't really have any deep conversations when you're out drinking or if you're
drunk, you don't remember them. So if you like to have interactions that you remember, that's normal.
That's fine. It's just a preference thing. But for you wanting more fulfilling activities and fulfilling connections, that's a level
of connection that you want.
And that's fine.
People who don't want that, they're fine also.
Everybody's allowed to do what they want.
Who gives a shit?
But don't question yourself and don't ask, am I normal?
None of us are normal.
Everybody's kind of weird.
Like I said, society,
it's things that are more accepted and people do more of versus not. So it's not really like
who's normal, who's not. I think more so you just want permission to not like those things.
You're allowed to not like drinking and you're allowed to not like going out. You're totally
fine. I'm 101 days sober as of right now. So I got tired of the whole phase too.
No point in it for my life right now.
I'm working on changes shit.
I'm moving soon after tour.
Literally right after tour, I'm moving.
The day my tour ends is July 1st.
July 7th is when my lease is up here.
I'm not renewing nothing in LA.
I'm getting the hell out of here.
But yeah, that's just a random little update with me. But I don't like a lot of things people like. It's
like a stereotype thing we talked about before. You don't have to like what other people like.
And it doesn't make you bad or wrong for not liking it. You like what you like. And there's
other people who also like what you like. So keep doing the things that you like to
do because that's how you meet the people who also like that. So I know it's going to
feel isolating a little bit. And you're like, nobody in their twenties understands. A lot of people don't.
And that's one thing that happens when you grow up too fast.
You don't enjoy the same things other people enjoy.
Like when you have more responsibilities and you've got more things to deal with,
more pressure, more shit going on, or you've been through certain things,
you're not able to just be so carefree and just
go about doing what other people do that are your age. You're going to feel very isolated. You're going to feel like no one understands. You're going to be like, I wish I could be carefree
and do those things. But that's a whole different topic. I feel like that's good for this episode.
So thank you for watching. If you like this episode, leave his video a thumbs up. And if
you're listening to the audio version on Apple Podcasts and Spotify,
let me five stars rating, you know, the drill.
And if you listen this far into the episode, comment a smiley face emoji, whichever smiley face you like the most.
I just like to go to the comments and see who actually listens all the way through.
Hey, you're a real one if you got this far.
But like I said, I do have nine more shows left on my tour.
So if you want to get a ticket, the link will be in the description.
I'll also leave all of my social media. Everything else you need from me will be there.
New merch is coming soon. Very, very soon.
And it might be out.
Before the next episode.
So keep up with my socials if you want to get a jump and a head start on it.
Since this is the end of the episode and the real ones are here,
the collection coming out is called Fuck Forgiveness. So get excited for that. All
the clothes are so sick. But that is all I've got for this episode. I'm going to shut up before I
get myself in trouble and reveal too much. Everybody be safe, take care of yourself,
and I'll talk to you guys next Sunday.