Aware & Aggravated - 4. Reset How Social Media Makes You Feel- Protection From It's Dark Psychology

Episode Date: September 7, 2024

This episode will completely reset the way social media makes you feel. This is your look behind the curtain ;)    Social Media: https://www.instagram.com/leoskepi https://www.tiktok.com/@leoskepi https://www.snapchat.com/add/leoskepi   Merch: https://shopleoskepi.com/collections/   My App Positive Focus: (Apple) https://apps.apple.com/us/app/positive-focus/id1559260311 (Google) https://play.google.com/store/apps/detailsid=com.positivefocusapp&hl=en_US&gl=US&pli=1   FaceBook Support Community:  https://m.facebook.com/groups/851294735925522/?ref=sharehttps://m.facebook.com/groups/851294735925522/?ref%3Dshare&exp=7ffb&mibextid=I6gGtw   Business Inquiries: [e-mail] 

Alright, here we go with resetting how social media makes you feel. I got two pages of notes. This episode requires a little bit of a disclaimer and kind of a trigger warning. Not really a trigger warning. Y'all know I don't do that shit. I more so want to clarify my intentions with this episode because I'm gonna seem like I'm talking bad about a lot of people. You know what? If it sounds bad, you did bad, you know, to set the record straight. My intention behind this episode is to shed light on things that are causing a lot of people pain and making a lot of people unhappy because of the contrast that they see on social media. I'm someone who is quote unquote considered an influencer by certain people. I also moved to LA and was there for a year and I left cause fuck that.

Basically I have perspective from both ends of it. I know behind the scenes and I know what you guys see. I'm going to clear up a lot of things for you and make you feel a lot less insane and a lot less insecure. Everything in this episode is to help you feel better. That's it. Everything I'm saying is from your side of the table. Me and you are sitting side by side. And if I sound like I'm attacking something,

it's just cause it's hurting you and I'm not attacking it. I'm just revealing the truth about it. And the truth hurts. That bitch will bite you. Okay. I just counted. I have eight different categories or topics I'm going to talk about with certain things. Let's just jump into it. First one is your physical appearance. There are a lot of things on social media that will make you feel very insecure when you shouldn't about the way that you look. You see an irrational number of extremely hot and wealthy people.

And when you open your phone multiple times a day and all you see is people who are hotter than you or just people who are insanely physically attractive. Your brain starts to get a little bit rewired with your baseline of what you think average is. So if you're seeing nothing but 10 out of tens on social media multiple times a day, all day, every day, that's all you see. You're going to have a war perspective when you go around about life and you're going to have a bad jaded view toward yourself.

You're going to see yourself as below average. Your perception of what is attractive is extremely warped. If you have any kind of insecurity or worry about the way that you look, go out in public. You will see how bad social media has warped your mind with thinking that you are ugly. You're comparing yourself to nothing but 10 out of 10 people who are controlling every angle you see them from and are controlling every single thing. Much less talk about filters and video editing and face app. Hollywood too,

sometimes just Hollywood one cause Hollywood too is too much. If you know what I'm talking about, you know what I'm talking about. A lot of girls do kiss three, three is too much. You got to do kiss two. If every time you get on social media, you feel ugly, I want to make you aware and reassure you that you're not crazy. And I also want to reassure you that you're not ugly. You just have a warped sense of what is more common than it actually is. The people who you see on social media,

who you idolize and look up to and you think looks so great, they're not the standard or like the norm. These people are the exception. These people are the 1%. And you're seeing them nonstop. Your algorithm is feeding them to you. And it makes you think that that 1% is the 99% and it makes you feel so much more behind, so much more unattractive than you actually are. So just keep that in the back of your head and hear me saying it. You're not ugly. I promise. Well, I don't know. I can't see you if you're ugly ugly

But you're not as ugly as social media makes you feel is the point that I want to bring up here and explain why This 1% you see is not the standard. Okay, like I said, if you want to feel better about yourself go out in public Watch the type of people that you see in real life and make your comparison and your judgment on that. Next thing is the facade that you see online. You know how when you were a kid and you were watching a TV show and you understood it is not normal for someone to always be ready or perfect or dressed and ready to go, especially in like a fight scene or like some kind of like dramatic scene.

Everybody's hair is always perfect. How y'all in a wind tunnel? How y'all in a car accident and you fresh laid like your hair looks perfect? That's not the point. You saw on tv shows and movies it is unrealistic for someone to always look put together and on and like they're always just dressed and ready and like they wake up in the morning and they fully get dressed for the day. Like not just a normal little like hangout chill outfit, like a fully go out and do shit outfit. You understand in shows and movies that is not realistic. With social media, all you see is people waking up. We're going to get to the morning routine bullshit.

But if you see it enough times, you kind of forget that they have moments where they don't look like that. Like some people get online looking raggedy as hell. Some people are honest about it ish. But most people, the ones that make you insecure, are not showing you their like down moments or their downtime or like when they have a rot day and they just lay in the bed, don't do nothing. They're not showing you that and they're popping up on their phone always just ready to go. Perfect outfit, perfect makeup. Everything is always just done. You see no effort into the getting ready. And it kind of sets up that like weird assumption that that's a standard you have to hold yourself to, but it's not realistic.

Not saying there aren't people like that, but the amount of people that social media leads you to believe live like that is absurd. So I wanted to point that out. Next thing is the clothing and the style of social media. You see everybody. Everything fits everybody perfectly. What you don't know and what they don't tell you is they get everything altered. Even girls that wear Fashion Nova shit, they get it altered. And the real gag is, let me hide my notes so in case I skip some that I would get canceled for,

I don't get like caught in the signs. I've witnessed this too many times with my own eyes. It's sad at this point what you actually don't see on the other side of social media. I've seen influencers like there's these pages called influencers in the wild and it's so funny because people will be at the beach or be on a hike and they have a full fucking lighting set up and you think oh they just took a good photo you wonder why your photos never look good when you just take them on the fly baby they ain't taking them on the fly they're looking like they take them on the fly but they're not other thing is clothing people will literally use chip clips to clip their clothes behind them where you don't see it so it looks like it fits better than it does that's one thing is

the photos nothing fits everybody that perfect all the time. And a lot of people get a lot of things custom tailored to them. So it looks better. Girls literally take their Fashion Nova shit and get it altered. So it looks good for their ad that they're doing. Do not get in your head every time you go out and you try and shop and buy clothes or find something and it don't fit you right, or it don't look good. It's not you.

I personally know that frustration of seeing everything look good on everybody else and being like, what the fuck? Nothing's made for me. I'm an exception because I'm six foot seven and I'm also a size 16 shoe. So it is kind of a pain in the ass with everything. But as far as like the fit goes, things don't fit people that perfectly. Even my friends with the most perfect bodies, real and plastic surgery filled, they can't even find shit that fits them all the time. That's perfect. So just keep it in the back of your head.

Don't get disheartened or overwhelmed or pissed off that it just seems like it's easy to find things that fit and then you have a problem doing it and you think something's wrong with you Don't let that thought cross your mind. There's so many things that are absolute bullshit. Let's keep going Oh my god, the effortless photo thing and the photo dump thing people who always think like Effortless photos, babe. You got to remember that they're fucking calculating it. They're telling someone they're with, Hey, will you take a photo of me? They're not just getting photos taken on the sly all the time and looking cute.

And the other thing is like when you know you want to take photos and you go actually have fun and live your night or live your day, you forget to take your phone out and take photos. You have to be aware and choose and put intentional effort behind, A make sure we take these photos. Will you pose with me like this? Can we do this? Can we do that? It's all calculated. It's all fucking calculated. And the key thing I just said was the times that you are enjoying your day or

enjoying your night is when you forget to take photos. The people who are showing up to events with the best photos had the worst fucking time because their entire experience there was trying to get photos, pausing over here, doing this, doing that. I've literally watched it. I've been to enough of these stupid ass parties and seeing these people live action. They're not hanging out. They're not having fun. They're in corners and in random fucking spots trying to get photos from the party to make it look like they had a good time. It's a bunch of horse shit.

If the photo is perfect and people just have tons of photos to post from everything they're doing, they're going to things to take photos at these things. They're not going to go. They went, but they didn't go. And that does make sense before someone trying to tell them that it makes it. It does. They went, but they didn't go. My whole thing there was don't beat yourself up for not always having great photos and pictures of yourself. Like if you're enjoying life and you're having fun and you're not training

yourself to stop every moment that you're in, that looks pretty, to take a photo. Don't beat yourself up that you don't have any photos or you don't have any good ones where like other people get them. They're not taking photos just off of their iPhone. I'm kind of tempted to talk about the equipment people use to make it look like it's from an iPhone. There's a certain camera you can buy, there's two. I have them, I don't fucking use them,

because I don't care. But I know all the tricks and all the things people use. There are so many cameras, they're like eight, 900 bucks that you take the photos, they come with the flash and they look better than your iPhone, but they look like you took them on an iPhone. Like you wonder how people get them so detailed and perfect. They're not using their phone, babe.

So don't freak out when you don't look right on your phone. They don't look right on their phone either. Next topic we're going into is not being able to find products because you can't trust nothing out of anybody's mouth. Everybody's sponsored, everybody's lying. And I know I do ads on my podcast and I do brand deals. I only do the brand deals I truly believe in and truly like. If you don't want to take my word, don't take it because I'm at a point on social media

as soon as I see someone is being paid to talk about something, I'm scrolling, I'm not listening because I've had too many experiences where you buy shit and it don't work or it doesn't give you the desired outcome. But I want to point out the whole like hopelessness of finding shit because let's say you want to look up skincare and you're like, what skincare actually works? These people who have this perfect skin, what are they actually using? You go on their page and they're talking about all this, that and a third from fucking CVS, babe. They're not using shit from CVS.

They're not using shit from Target. They're using medical grade. Is clinical, zo skin, IS clinical, whatever they call it. They're using medical grade. They're not using the things that they're promoting and pretending that they're using. So I understand that whole like mental fuck it of like, you feel like you cannot trust anything or anyone. You can't get a recommendation. You can't use social media or a tick tock or Instagram or anything to find products anymore. Like, okay,

what are good sheets to buy for a bed and all these Joe Schmo, every single one of them got a promo code promo code. I'm like, okay, what are good sheets to buy for a bed? And all these Joe Schmo, every single one of them got a promo code, promo code. I'm like, what are you actually using? Because I've seen people way too many times promote products and not actually use them. My favorite thing to do was to go into influencers apartments or celebrities houses. When I was in LA, like I was friends with them. My favorite thing was to go look at the shit that they actually use that's how I found the good

skincare I will give credit where it's due because some of them do use the products that they talk about but they don't only use the products they talk about and are paid to talk about they'll hold certain things back and be like yeah I use this moisturizer it's great but they don't tell you the cleansers they use the facials they get the laser treatments that they get on their face and all the serums and all the extra shit they don't tell you the cleansers they use, the facials they get, the laser treatments that they get on their face and all the serums and all the extra shit. They don't tell you everything. They'll be like, okay, I'm paid to promote this product, so I'm going to promote this one. And typically in brand contracts,

you cannot shout out or talk about any other brand in a paid partnership type video. So they'll talk about one thing they use and they'll pretend like it's the thing that changed everything and made their skin so perfect. It's not. They got 24 products that they use and 72 products they pretend to use. So keep that in mind. Whenever you buy things and they don't work for you, a lot of people aren't really using the shit that they talk about and they

promote. And also it might not be all that they're using to get the desired outcome. And that's another thing that pisses me off. People are so worried about making a sale and making money versus making sure people have the experience that they want and get the result that you're promising them when you're telling them to buy shit. The other thing I learned to do is just start asking people in public because you can't trust anything you see on social media at all.

Any recommendation you see, throw it out the window, babe. Ask the people in real life who look the way you want to look or have something that you have what they use, because a lot of these influencers, they got shit skin. They got skin that looks flawless online. You eat them in person. It's like, damn, how you do that? Actually tell me the makeup you use to cover it. Cause how the fuck you doing that witchcraft over here? Give me those products actually.

You don't know skincare, but you know cover up. Teach me that. I'm being a little rude at this point, but when I say ask people in public, if you see someone out in public with great skin, genuinely great skin in real life, ask them what they use. I guarantee you there will not be one product that they say that they use that you see on social media. I'm going to start a series on my TikTok of all the things I actually use, not paid, not sponsored, not nothing. All the things I've found.

I'm going to start talking about it and promoting them just so you can get valid information because that's what I want so bad is to need something or want something and know that I can trust someone's recommendation. I'm so sick of this shit and I've seen both sides of it. Like the way people lie, I cannot even begin to explain the things I've seen. If you only take one thing away from this video, remember this. Everything you see on social media should be taken in as entertainment. Don't take a f**k thing serious that you see. Even some of the tragic stories or events happening.

I don't want to say don't trust them. Do your research and fact check. A lot of things people claim are going on aren't a lot of things people say oh donate to this donate to that it helps that money's not actually going where you think it's going. Do your research I'm not saying too much because the triangle people gonna come get me. One more thing I keep seeing. Okay, this thing that I keep seeing on social media, don't let people lie to you to your face. So obviously, call these people out.

Start just calling them out on their crap. When you see somebody lying, call it out. Because I keep seeing influencers and people with fucking veneers, perfect porcelain teeth, promoting with white ending strips. And you know that little mouthpiece that all these dumbasses keep shoving in their mouth with a little light on it and like, oh I sit here with this binky in for an hour every night and my teeth are white. No, you have veneers, you lying shit. That's something I keep seeing over and over

and I'm like, please don't fall for it. Like I'm looking at you, please do not fall for it. These people are so full of shit and they will lie straight to your face. Oh my, like it's actually funny. Like it's funny when you see them trying to do it and it's so transparent, like just giggle at it and laugh. But no, don't trust when you see them trying to do it and it's so transparent like just giggle at it and laugh But no don't trust nothing you see social media is entertainment. Okay

next topic we got is Assuming that people have an easy life or that things should be easier than they are for you This is something that used to wreck me a lot mentally is you never see people have minor inconveniences wreck me a lot mentally is you never see people have minor inconveniences. Everybody gets online and cries and bitches and wines when they feel like they've been mistreated or they have like some experience or whatever, but like just basic minor inconveniences that happen day to day. Like you drop something and you break it. Or like today, I ordered a washer and dryer for my house and the washer came

damaged. So I only have the dryer. So the guys had to take the washer back. I don't know when I'm supposed to get it. I'm over here just sitting here with a dryer. Am I posting about it? No, I'm talking about it now. But the basic like log, people are not logging every inconvenience that happens. Like any of the ironic shit that happens that everyone experiences, social media makes it seem like no one experiences it, but you, you will be stuck in a mindset thinking that you're the only one having things

go wrong or the only one dealing with certain headaches and certain bullshit and just certain inconveniences. And it makes you feel frustrated because your brain starts to associate living like them will relieve me of a lot of the feelings that I feel and things that happen. If I just looked like this or lived like this or I was able to be financially free and not have to work. If I had this life that I'm seeing where there is no inconveniences,

I would not have inconveniences. But when you have shit in your life where you can't control it or change it, it'll make you start to resent what you can't change even more because you see it as the cause of your unhappiness. You're like, Oh, if I didn't have this thing, then I could be happy like them. The only reason things go wrong for me is because I'm not XYZ that I see just to let you know, pretty or not rich or not, everybody deals with minor inconveniences. No one's posting about them.

So don't think something is wrong with you and don't let people's perfect little images, the facades that you see online make you turn on yourself and make you start to get mad at yourself and start to resent the things in your life that you're unhappy with and thinking that's the reason that you can't be happy. Another thing is addictions. Everybody online hides shit that they do. I'm not saying every single person is full fledged addicted to things,

but most people smoke or vape or get high or you get what I mean? I shit you not. There are influencers who are the most wholesome, put together, goody two shoes, perfect image type people who have smoked a cigarette with me or have sent me videos. If I haven't met them in person, I've had so many influencers and just people in general, message me photos of them smoking, be like, I love, I'm thinking of you. Like I'm a smoker too. I just hide it and they bond with me because I'm open about it. But all these people come to me about their addictions that they hide.

A lot of people are alcoholics and they fully know it, but they hide it. So many people with eating disorders hide them. You wonder why so many of these models are so skinny. They don't fucking eat. They vape all day. Social media is for entertainment. Remember don't make assumptions because things are just left out. People withhold certain things on purpose, but it doesn't mean it's not there. There are so many people who smoke, there are so many people who drink,

there are so many people who do drugs that you wouldn't even think and they hide it. And I'm talking people who smoke, there are so many people who do drugs that you wouldn't even think and they hide it. And I'm talking people who smoke like two packs a day and you'd never know they'd smoke a cigarette online. You'd have no idea. So do not feel alone in your addictions or whatever things that you do. Just don't turn on yourself and convince yourself that other people aren't dealing with it. They are. A lot of people are hiding it and you're not alone in it.

You're not alone in any of the feelings that you feel and you're not alone in any of the substances or things that you use or do. And also do not turn it on yourself where if I wasn't drinking or if I didn't smoke or if I didn't XYZ, I could be happy like that. Don't turn on yourself and use the things you see about yourself that you don't see about other people as the reason why you should attack yourself and be down on yourself and be upset and be pissed off and use that as the reason why you can't be happy and like use it as like the cause of why you're unhappy. It's not true. You're not alone in it. Just remember me saying that the things you struggle with, you're never alone in it. The next thing I'm hitting is travel. People online make it seem like traveling is so easy. It's a breeze.

They be, oh, come on my flight with me, and everything goes smooth, and it's perfect, and it's easy. Or they just pop up in a new destination, traveling all the time, make it seem like it's no big deal. It's just easy. They're never stressed out. They're just happy as could be. Their breakdown is five seconds before

they recorded the happy clip, just to let you know. Traveling is always stressful for everyone. It's not easy, it's not breezy, it's not beautiful, it's not cover-gura, it's not a simple thing, and it's not a cheap thing, like for anybody. But the thing I wanna point out with travel is you never know what people are going through to get to where they're at.

When I went to Bora Bora, I saw nothing but people taking a flight and being in paradise. Let me just give you a little truth about what going to certain places is like and you don't see the like hoops you got to jump through. So when I went to Bora Bora, we had to take a flight that was like nine hours to Tahiti. And in Tahiti, you got to stay the night. There's no just straight shot. You have to get on a separate flight to Bora Bora. So you have to go stay at a resort because the life and like civilization around the airport is not safe and it's not like good by any means.

Like it's actually very good by any means. Like it's actually very, very sad. So you get in a cab, a shitty, scary ass cab, they don't have Ubers. They don't have nothing. Well, this was back like five, six years ago when I went, but I don't know what it's like now, but it was not good. It was not a safe like type thing. You get to the resort, everything's beautiful. Everything's perfect. You're like, what the fuck? You're in a whole different world versus what you just drove out of. You stay at the resort. Next day,

you got to wake up and go get on a little propeller plane. It looked like you got to get out and spin it and push the motherfucker off the ground, flying spirit type thing. You got to go get on a propeller plane. No first-class seats. They were metal benches. You just sit on, but they were sweet because they brought everybody around like a little cup of mango juice and it's in a little plastic cup yeah nothing elegant nothing flashy nothing like fancy like everybody pretends you take this little plane and you land in the little Bora Bora Airport baby the gag you're gonna have if you ever go first you got to find your bags and get

your bags that you checked next you got to find your bags and get your bags that you checked. Next, you got to go find the hotel or the resort that you're staying at. There's a lot of different ones on the island and around the island. So you go to the little exit where your resort is at and then you have to get on a boat. And I'm not talking about a yacht. I'm talking about a boat, like a little boat, kind of scary little boat, because you got to get on the boat with all your luggage, with a few strangers, and you got to go 40 minutes to your resort. And the boat ride is not easy. It's not chill.

You're getting soaked and fucking wet, bumping and blowing around. A lot of them didn't have like overhead things. So you're just sitting in direct sunlight for 40 minutes. You get to your resort, you get to your little like place you stand and then you got to get off. You walk up to the thing and then you got to get on a golf cart, which takes you to your bungalow or your room or wherever you're staying. It's a lot more than just, oh, get on a flight and go pop over there. There's security, there's customs,

out the ass, there's checkpoints and go pop over there. There's security, there's customs, out the ass, there's checkpoints everywhere for security with everything. It's not cute, it's not lavish, it's not luxurious. That's how it goes for every single person who goes to that island. Now if you're the Kardashians, I don't know, they probably got a direct plane that will fly them right to their bungalow.

One could dream. But nobody's posting that shit. Nobody's posting the little nappy propeller flame they got to get on to get to the island. They're just posting their little like first class seat on the way to Tahiti. They're not posting the reality. They're posting the nice things they're doing. They're resort. They're not posting a little boat. They just sat in for an hour. You know what I mean?

So that's just one thing that's going to like shock you if you start traveling a lot. Once you start traveling, you're going to realize social media is a bunch of horse shit. Another thing with social media is you never understand the smell of certain places. I've traveled a lot of places and I get it and I can vouch for it. Things look a lot better on social media than they are. When you're there there a lot of places smell fucking weird. A lot of places are very unsafe. A lot of places are not clean. They're very like run-down for a tourist attraction like the Eiffel Tower. A shit show, babe. But my point is don't look at other

people's experiences and have it set false expectations for how yours should go. When you go travel and you see real life. Don't get bummed out It's the experience don't let a false expectation Ruin your experience or make you think something's gone wrong or something's bad or whatever like that People ain't posting the truth of it go into every experience where you travel and just go into it for What you're gonna get out of it and your experience you're gonna have don't trust the shit you see on social media Okay, I've said it before and I'm going to keep saying it. I guess this whole episode. Next thing is friendships.

Social media makes it seem like it's easy peasy to make friends. I need to let you in on a little secret and I want you to read between the lines. When I say this, I'm not name dropping nobody, but people who you think are best friends aren't. People who you think are very close friends aren't. I don't care how close they seem. A lot of these people are not actually friends. It is something they're doing for business or for social media.

A lot of people, you get it. I'm not going to keep going into it. You read between the lines. You get what I'm saying. You're never going to know who I'm talking about. But the people you see, you think are friends, they not. The other thing is people will post like a video with somebody and look like they're best friends in it.

They just fucking met. Influencers have a real, real like keen ability to make it seem like they know everyone and make it seem like they are close to everyone. These people don't have this many friends. Social media also makes it seem like it's very easy to make friends, but I'm going to give you a little like heads up when you're an influencer or you're big online or you have any kind of like following. It's easy to meet people and connect because you go to a city. If I post on my private story, Oh, I'm here. Everybody who follows me,

who also lives there is like, let's hang out. Let's do this. Let's do that. It's very easy to connect and meet people. And it's easy from the outside to look at influencers and be like, Oh, you have all these friends, you know, all these people, all this shit. No, they're mooching off each other, trying to get followers and hang out and put on an image. They're just jerking off each other, trying to get followers and hang out and put on an image. They're just jerking off each other's numbers. Basically. They're trying to get associated with each other to be taken more serious and

like meet people and netwip my ass. The point is these people ain't actually got this many friends. I do not recommend being friends with any influencer ever. And if you're also an influencer, look at other influencers who want to be friends with you as colleagues They're not your fucking friend. They don't care about you. They will steal from you. They will lie to you They will lie about you. They will do anything for clout to cardi B Said it best these hoes do anything for clout and they fucking will they will flip on you. They will turn on you

They will literally to your face behind closed doors have a conversation with you They will literally to your face behind closed doors have a conversation with you Agreeing with everything you're saying and then go online and pretend the opposite because they're like Oh, you just gotta say what the people want you to hear It's the fakest bunch of bullshit You'll ever fucking see these people don't actually have this many friends and you see famous people together you see influencers together They ain't actually friends. I feel like I'm gonna to get in a little trouble for talking about all this. Who the fuck is going to get me in trouble? I don't care. I don't like none of you anyway.

And I've said it to all your fucking faces. If you're watching me, you know, I don't like you. Quick little pause to talk about the sponsor of today's podcast and it's Osea. The cool thing about Osea is all of their products are seaweed infused. Their new Undaria algaegae Body Wash will turn your shower routine into a tropical little paradise with its all-natural uplifting citrusy scent. And the Undaria Algae Body Wash infuses your shower with the healing power of the sea, formulated with nourishing, nutrient-rich Undaria seaweed, glycerin, and an oil blend.

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like actual like, damn, you smell good kind of way. If this sounds interesting to you, you can upgrade your shower with vegan face and body care from Osea. Get 10% off your first order site-wide with code AWARE at oseamalibu.com. Now, back to the podcast. Next topic I want to go into with social media is making you spend money. If you feel like you constantly have to spend money or you're noticing social media is making you spend money. If you feel like you constantly have to spend money or you're noticing social media is making you spend an incessant amount of money, you need to understand

a little bit about the psychology of marketing. Social media has gotten very good, very, very good at making people believe that they need something. So the way that they do it, and like a big tactic that goes on with social media is people will explain what it's like to live with the result that you want. They will explain how a certain product has given them this result and they have it.

And then you see what that product will give you if you have it. And the reason you feel like you need it is because you've just experienced like in your brain, you already thought forward and imagined what your life would be like with this product or with this thing or with this result. Now, you are back in your reality of not having it. So you experience what it's gonna be like to have it, then you don't have it.

And then you're like, wait, now I have to get it. Why is it two day shipping? I need it now. I think I fully get it, but just understand, like I said before, the things people are promoting gave them certain results are either one, not it, or two, not all that did it. But so many products going around and always being pushed in your face makes you start to think that your life is not actually as good as it is because there are

certain things you can't afford to get and you're doing nothing but envisioning this result. And then you're back in your reality of not having it. And it will make you feel like you're a lot more unhappy than you actually are. And it will make you feel like you have a lot less than you actually do, but your reality right now is okay. It's perfectly fine. You don't need all of these products. Like their marketing has convinced you to feel that you do. It's not true. And just pay attention to that every time you start thinking that you need

something or you start anticipating a certain result because some Joe Schmo promised it to you. Right. Another thing I want to point out with spending money and feeling like you always need to be buying shit and doing shit and keeping up, like feeling like you can't keep up for you to go get like a bag that you love. You get excited about it. You love it. It's making your day.

And then you get online and you see on social media somebody with 10 of them, all different colors. You're going to be like, what the fuck? You're going to see the comparison and be like, like me having mine is not special anymore because that's what special is. And you strive and you're like, okay, so I need more colors. I need more versions of it. I need more. I need more. You don't need more. Stop looking at the contrast and giving a shit.

If you find something that you love, you're allowed to love it. And so many people showing you how many more they have, it doesn't make yours less. People with Birkins, if you want a Birkin and you get a Birkin, most people would be happy as shit to have one. Now, if you don't got at least 10, you ain't nobody on social media because so many people are bragging about all these bags and all the shit that they have. Just remember me saying, you don't need more and your thing that is making you happy is not less because you don't have as many as somebody else.

Enjoy the moment and stop looking at it. Your phone's listening to you. You ever notice you're just talking about something in conversation and all of a sudden you start getting ads for it or you go buy a certain bag and then all of a sudden you get ads for more of them? You're like, what the fuck? Stay off your phone after you find something that makes you happy because you're going to be faced with that like, Oh, it's not enough.

You need more and it's going to like ruin the moment. Just be happy off your damn phone. I was going to save this topic for last, but since I just talked about shopping, let me tell you the truth. The amount of hauls and unboxings and things that you see people buy is not normal. Like I said before, with the hot people, you are seeing the hottest of the hot. boxings and things that you see people buy is not normal. Like I said before, with the hot people, you are seeing the hottest of the hot. You are seeing the 1% of hot people,

and it makes you think that that level of looking a certain way is normal. Everybody just looks like that when you open your phone, so it warps your brain. Thinking that people spend money like you see on social media ruins your, any type of self-esteem for any money that you make because I go and buy something for a thousand dollars or ten grand and I'm like woo that was huge it was a treat it was great whatever and then I see some dumb ass

go spend a hundred grand on something or like more of what I just bought and I'm like damn and then you see them doing it every day. Every day they're buying something new and they're spending hundreds of thousands of dollars a month and you're like okay like huh it's not normal though. That's what I want to point out is the amount of money you see people spending is not normal. That is 1% type shit but the other thing I want to point out is a few things people do to look like they are buying more than they're actually buying. So, a lot of people are in credit card debt.

This is not the juiciest one, we're gonna get to them, but I want to point out the credit card debt thing. A lot of people are in credit card debt. I saw this influencer the other day on live, and they were like, oh yeah, I'm $400,000 in debt. Huh? Like, how do you get in that much debt? I don't know.

I've never carried a balance on a credit card. I don't like debt. But it has become like such a normal thing for people to be in exorbitant amounts of debt. And I'm not saying people who have to live day to day. The price of everything getting so damn high and people's inability to live normally because of like normal jobs not paying enough

or really good jobs not being enough to sustain basic life and like rent and everything going up. Debt for that I understand but the people who you see living so lavishly and luxuriously, a lot of them are in debt to have that image and look that way. Why someone would ever admit, I'm $400,000 in debt because I bought too much designer shit. Why you would ever say that out of your mouth online and public to anyone? Beyond me. I would never. I would lie and I would hide it. What the fuck? But just know if you're over here wondering how the hell they buying so much stuff, here's my next point. A lot of brands and a lot of stores and companies will do like a paid deal with an influencer and they will give them credit for things to buy from their store.

And they will say, okay, for your video, these brands are excluded. Like Louis Vuitton, Prada, Tom Ford, they'll say certain brands are excluded. You cannot get these brands and talk about them in the video. We want you to talk about other brands. So the influencer will use the credit that they have for the brands that the brand will allow them to talk about. And then they will do an unboxing with all this new shit from the little credit that they got for making that video.

And then they will return it and buy the shit they actually wanted with the credit. So now you see two halls. You don't understand. The first one was just to make it look like you're getting a bunch of shit and to promote it and do the brand deal. But then they return everything, get the credit back,

and use it on the brands that they actually want it from and get the things they actually want. But all you see is two $20,000 hauls. You don't understand it was free and one entire haul was returned. That's one thing that gagged the hell out of me when I realized that another thing is people will buy things and return them.

Another thing is people use subscriptions for designer bags and watches. There are subscription services where you can pay like a hundred, 200 bucks a month and you can rent a designer bag for the month and you can pick the one that you want. You can rent a fucking Birkin, you can rent a Chanel bag, you can rent a Louis Vuitton bag for 200 bucks a month. And people will use these bags for a month. So it looks like, oh, you bought, you've been using it. You didn't just return it after the haul. You've been using it for a month so it looks like oh you bought it you've been using it you didn't just return it after the haul you've been using it for a couple of weeks and then they send it back and get their next bag so it looks like they're

constantly just getting new bags wearing new bags but they're always fucking sending them back that's another thing I didn't realize existed same thing with watches people can do that with watches also you see these little finance bros and these people selling course days and they're always showing up with a new watch yeah go back and track and see how long they've had it and if they only little finance bros and these people selling course days and they're always showing up with a new watch. Yeah. Go back and track and see how long they've had it. And if they only wore it for a certain period of time, yeah, that was on a loan. There absolutely are people who spend money like that and have that lifestyle.

But the amount that you see it is not real. Most of the people who can afford to live that way are not fucking posting about it. I've met some of them. They despise social media. They despise talking about wealth. They just have closets full of shit. They don't even touch or use. They have all the new collections from every designer sent to their house. It's the private shopping thing. They bring it all to the house. They pick what they want to keep and they send all the rest of the way.

They literally shop in their living room. People are too famous to do it, but the people who are actually able to spend money like that are not these people you see on social media. Most of them, there are a select few who actually spend the way that you might see. Most of them don't do not think it is normal for people to be able to go buy all this jewelry nonstop all the time. Bags, shoes, clothes, cars, houses. People are not buying this shit as much as it seems. I just don't want you to get down on yourself because this is something that's brought me down on myself over time. Like multiple times it's happened.

I always have to remind myself, but a few years ago it really fucked me up mentally. It was like feeling so behind and seeing so many people doing all these things and desensitizing myself to making $10,000 a month, seeing people make a hundred thousand, a million dollars a month over and over and over again, it makes you feel like your 10,000 is nothing. It's insane. It's fucking great. So don't let other people's false realities take away from and make you feel like your reality is diminished and that it's not important or that it's not

good. Most of it is fake. All right, we got two topics left. The next one I'm going into is fitness advice. Oh my God, this one, babe, they're all on steroids. People who you think aren't on steroids are. If you have to question it they are and even people that you think no way they're on steroids, yeah they are. Yeah even people who look very normal are on steroids. Anozympoic, a lot of people are using so many things they're lying to you about not telling you and people who lie about things that they're doing to their body and not being truthful about it and then convincing you that their course or

their program or their meal plan or their one-on-one coaching for diet and exercise is gonna make you look like them that's fucking scamming in my opinion unless their course tells you their cycle the things that they're injecting into themselves the work they've had done and the things they recommend to do to actually look how they want to look. Unless their course is nothing but the raw truth and shit that is illegal to tell you, it's not the truth. I've seen some of the biggest fitness influencers wake up and eat five fucking cookies for breakfast and they eat like shit all day and then they eat a little good at night.

They get their protein in and they look fine. A lot of these people don't eat the way that they say that they do because their drugs that they're taking counter it. If someone does not look normal, do not expect normal ways to achieve it. So if someone has spectacular muscles or looks or physique or skin or whatever, and they give you basic bullshit advice, it's clear the discrepancy. If they look normal and they give you normal advice, that's fine. It adds up when they have above average, like tremendous results, and they tell you basic normal bullshit

is how they got there, they're lying to you. Don't buy their course, don't buy their nothing. Also the supplements they try to sell you, they're all sponsored by the damn brands, they suck. Most supplement companies suck. Everything tastes like shit. That's one thing I'll tell you the truth about. Protein powders, they all taste a little bit like chalk. You just gotta choke it down. Okay? So

these people saying, oh, doesn't even taste like protein. Yeah, the fuck it does. Yeah, it does. Especially the vegan ones, the plant-based ones. Oh, you lying. Tastes like you licked a chalk board, baby. Uh-uh. All right. The last topic I want to hit for this episode is people's routines and the freedom they seem to have and the lifestyle that they portray that they live. People that have responsibilities in life and things that they have to do and certain obligations that comes with distractions and your attention and your focus not being able to only be on waking up and meditating and having a lemon water and writing a gratitude

journal. These are all good things to do if you can do them. But if you try to do them and you seem like it's very inconvenient, it's because it fucking is. The people that you see with these long, extensive morning routines don't have distractions. They don't have responsibilities that are pressing. A lot of people have the freedom to just sit back and do whatever the hell they want. If you work a nine to five, you are not going to have the same level of ease to do a 12 step,

two hour morning routine as some Joe Schmo who got rich from selling courses and don't do a thing with his day and has no responsibilities just to pretend to look busy so we can keep selling to people. If their biggest concern is looking like they're busy, they're not f**k busy. So of course they can do all this. The other thing is like these routine videos and the cooking videos and the restock videos, these people are not actually restocking their s**t every week like you see on TikTok. To have something look aesthetic takes a lot of effort. These people's videos are not real. Every

single time you see a morning routine and you see them waking up in bed, babe, they woke up, put some makeup on, maybe wash their face, did a little deep puffing something, put some ice on their eyes. So they don't look ugly when they wake up. They set up their camera, get back into bed and take the clip. Like you're just getting out to bed. No, it's a bunch of horse shit until you see someone genuinely wake up in the morning, click their phone looking fucked up, like eye boogers in their eyes,

like slimy spit because you've been sleeping all night. Until you see the truth of it, of like someone actually waking up like hell, walking into the bathroom, wanting to fucking hang themselves, brushing their teeth, drinking some water, dragging themselves downstairs to get coffee. Yeah, that's a real morning routine.

That's a little bit more realistic. But the people who have the time to go set up everything all aesthetic and to set up all the lighting and set up everything for every shot to look cute and get the aesthetic with the sound effect of pouring their water, pouring their coffee. Babe, if their house looks unlived in, it's for the camera. If their aesthetic is museum and like no living body lives in their house,

the pillows are always perfect and ironed and flushed and the sheets have no wrinkles. They are flat pressed and steamed. Yeah, no, it's not happening. That's not how they actually live. So look at their content for entertainment. It's nice to see how you pretend to be because I know you don't act like that. I know you ain't really living like that.

The other thing is the fake peace that people show on social media. Like when they just seem like they wake up so peaceful and they just have a peaceful day and they're just going about life and it's just birds chirping and butterflies and rose bunch of horse shit. People are not peaceful like that and I can assure you it is not 24 hours a day. They're not showing you what they're actually dealing with how they're actually feeling. They're trying to look cute for the camera. They're trying to sell you a lifestyle to sell you their products to

make them more money. They don't actually live like that. A lot of these people are stressed to the gills. A lot of these people are dealing with a lot of things. Like I said, they hide the inconveniences they deal with. So they hide their frustration. They hide the headache. They hide the disappointment. They hide the sadness. They hide everything. And it makes you assume they just live in that state of peace all of the time. Nobody's mind is that perfect where there's no thought behind it and everything is just peachy keen, no bodies. Everybody deals with things. And everyone has multiple emotions all day long.

People have things happen all the time, all day long. It's not picture perfect ever. So don't make yourself like get down on yourself and be like, oh, I need to have a morning routine like this because they have this piece that I want. They seem happy. So I'm going to try and do what they're doing to be happy like that. They're not showing you the reality of it, babe. People who are truly happy feel all of their emotions. They don't only feel one. And if you're seeing someone only feel one emotion, you're not seeing the rest of it. You're not seeing the truth of it. They're full of shit.

That was my last point I wanted to hit for all this, but I hope you understand that you are normal. You are okay. And you are doing better than you think you are. And I hope the way that social media makes you feel has been reset by some of the things that I've said. If you like this video and you're watching this on YouTube, leave it a thumbs up and hit subscribe if you're new. Cause I put out videos every single Sunday. Also leave me a comment.

I love feedback. I love getting the comments, reading everything. Even if I don't reply to everything, I'd be reading it. I'd be nosy. I love to keep up with y'all. But if you're listening to this podcast on the audio version on Apple podcasts and Spotify, make sure to leave this podcast at five star rating. It helps a bunch. Thank you. For everyone confused why I'm wearing a hoodie.

This is part of my new merch coming out very soon. Just wait. I just had a TG a little bit. It's so fucking good. I will leave everything you need for me in the description, all my social media, my app, everything you need. But with that being said, everybody be safe, take care of yourself, and I'll talk to you guys next Sunday.