BEING HER with Margarita Nazarenko - 128: The Ultimate Guide to Feminine Energy

Episode Date: August 31, 2025

Ultimate guide to feminine energy See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to keep the human, human, human, human. Hello, my beautiful human. Welcome to the ultimate guide to feminine energy. We have done the ultimate guide to detachment and the ultimate guide to men. And if you've ever wanted to learn about feminine energy, what it can do for you to optimize your life and how it can just turn around your ultimate existence, then this is the video for you. This is some of the best highlights of what I've talked about when it comes to feminine energy.

Of course, there's more on my podcast or on the channel if you're watching there. so discover those but for now sit down have a cup of tea have a martini and enjoy this two-hour podcast. Hello, hello, hello today we're going to talk about secrets to success as a feminine energy woman and they are not things like receive gifts and accept things and, you know, all of that jargon that we are used to listening to. These are ten habits, one might say. These are ten non-negotiables, one might add.

And if you are watching this, you will see that I'm on. tangling my necklaces, which love to tangle. Why must you cause more drama than you are worth? Anyway, we leave them, we move on. Guys, my book is so close to launching. Please do pre-order. It's in the description boxes everywhere, everywhere, everywhere. I'm so excited. And a lot of the points I'm going to touch on this are some of them are in the book, some of them are not. But trust me, the stuff you will see in the book is new, delicious and incredible. I am 100% sure you will enjoy it. Let's move on to the 10 success principles of women who are successful.

Number one, early to bed and early to rise makes you healthy, wealthy and wise. Okay, let's set aside the fact that everyone's mom and their dog and their granny to tell them to get up early and go to bed early. If you want to be a woman who is in your success and in your element and, living with your circadian rhythm, there is no wonder that everyone on their podcast, and as I said, your grandma, talks about going to bed early and waking up early. Why you might say? Because if you adhere to the natural rhythms of your body, especially as a woman, what does that mean? That means your natural cycle. That means times in your life. That means the winters of your, of the year as well, and the foods and the foods that are in season. And if you want me to go into that, I can.

can, but I'm going to tell you something. It's really, really important to adhere to natural elements if you want to be a feminine woman who is in your element and is successful. Since I used to, listen to me, I used to go to bed at 1 a.m. and wake up at God knows what hour and wonder why I felt a bit off or sluggish, or this one or that one or the other one, let me tell you, if you go to bed as the sun sets, and I don't mean as the sunsets, you fall into bed, but as it gets dark, your body unwinds, you turn off all the blue light, you use the red light, and you wake up as the sun rises. And the most important part is you repeat it in the same way every day. That will create a rhythm in your body where your body is ready for the day. It's excited for the day. It's honed, primed, and it's good to go. It definitely

changed my success. Do you wonder why I wear a whoop and an aura ring? I'm showing them to you if you're watching this on YouTube, not because I'm a psycho, actually has become a psycho, but because I am so religious about my sleep and getting up on time and all of that good stuff. And let me tell you, I have a four-month-old. If you are a parent and you've gone through the four-month-sleep progression, are you okay? Because I'm not okay. I've done it twice. I've got two children, and I am not okay. But even with that, I am tracking my sleep and making sure that there is a rhythm and I might not always hit it, but I go to bed early and I get up early. And I don't know how, but I get more done now than I did before this habit and before having children.

How was it that I could not record one YouTube video a week before having children and not having any responsibilities? Tell me how. Pray tell me. I don't know how. And now I can record a podcast, a couple of YouTube videos, write a book and all that stuff. Why? Because I go to bed early and I get up early. Let me tell you, it changed something. Number two, habit of feminine women who creates success in their life is a positive mindset. The art of reframing is key. I'm going to tell you it as an anecdote because I can tell you all the art of reframing,

see things positivity when they're not yadda, until the cows come home. This is probably the busiest season of my life. I was talking to somebody, a therapist. This is not my therapist. This is somebody I know who is a therapist. And I was saying that I have had something come up, which I've always wanted to do,

but I'm not sure I can fit it into my life work-wise because I've got such a young child and I've got so much work going on and I've got so many things on my plate currently that I don't feel I can do it and I would not, it would not fit in because I would not, not because time-wise wouldn't fit in, but because I couldn't put my best foot forward essentially. And she said to me, what if you reframe it as the fact that this thing that you want to do, you're not sure in what capacity you can do it, but perhaps the fact that you're, that you have children and so much on your plate means that you could just dip your toe into it. Let's say it's weightlifting, this thing that I want to do.

Let's say it's weightlifting, just a comparison, because I don't want to talk about it until it happens or if it happens or if I decide to do it. So let's say I want to become professional weightlifter, right? And because I don't know if I can dedicate the time, I don't know if I even like weightlifting, she said to me, listen, maybe you, because you have the children and because you have so many projects in the book and all this, maybe they're actually a protective thing for you, that you wouldn't launch it to weightlifting and completely do something that you don't want to do, but you just get to dip your foot in. And the fact that you have children and so many other projects in

your life right now means that you can kind of try it, but not fully commit, and it's kind of protective. So I reframed in that moment seeing my children and my busyness and my motherhood and my podcast and my work and everything as something that I think of because of this, I can't that my weightlifting career, let's just say. And she said, listen, maybe it is a protective thing. And in that moment, my mind completely changed. I had this mindset about, and I talk about it in my book and several podcasts already, but when I was cheated on in the past, I reframed it to the fact that I would have never left that person had they not cheated because I'm a committed person. You know, I keep pushing, I keep trying. So had he not cheated, I would have never left. And I would have been

with someone who doesn't truly like me or love me, right? Tragic. Trag, absolute trudge. And having talked to her, I realized, wow, me being a mom right now of a young child and kids who need me isn't a hindrance, but they are protecting me from maybe going into something that I have never done before. You know, weightlifting is a big commitment, you know, do I really want to be a bodybuilder?

By the way, it's not bodybuilding, but you know what I mean? So women who are in their feminine and create success, learn to reframe and have a positive mindset. You need to take anything that happened to you and reframe it to see the positive in it because that is the true power of feminine energy. Number three, despite as a woman being able to multitask, you need to be able to prioritize. Do not diversify your focus more than you need to. Goals and a target that you're working towards in certain seasons of your life. I've talked to you about bullet journaling. I've talked to you about mindset. If you haven't seen that, go into my podcast or go on to YouTube and look it up.

There are success principles, eight success principles, I believe it's called. You need to understand what's important and don't try and spread yourself thin like butter on crusty toast. You need to be thick butter with caviar on top, babe. And if you've never had crusty white baguette with a thick butter slab and caviar that is black, I don't know. You need to try it. You just need to try it. even if the caviar's fake, just try that because a combination has got me obsessed.

There is the Eisenhower principle. Things are either important and urgent, those things you do right now, things that are important and not urgent, you write down to do for tomorrow, things that are urgent but not important, you delegate, and things that are not urgent and not important, you don't do. So you need to write down all the things you need to do and put them into one of those four Eisenhower categories. He was the president of America, wasn't he, I believe?

And that's the Eisenhower principle of important and urgent. You cannot diversify and do everything, everything, everything. This morning, I had a massive go at my husband because he was telling me to find all his stuff. I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate me sharing this. Actually, he doesn't care. He doesn't even listen. So I'm going to tell you, he loses everything and I have to find everything to the point where my son is like, I don't know when this is constantly.

And I'm like, well, find it, Leo. And he goes, no, you find it because you find it. everything. I am not Scooby-Doo. I am not solved the mystery over here, you know. And I said to the men and my family, I said, listen, I appreciate what you're doing, right? But I will lose my living mind because I cannot be spread thin like margarine on crusty toast. I am butter with caviar. Do not come for me because I don't ask for you. Okay, back away. Have priorities. We learn as women to be everything for everyone and so thinly spread and so highly strong and I have seen many productive, successful, amazing, beautiful women, but I've never seen relaxed women. And it's time for the season

of relaxed, happy women. Number four, find time for yourself on the back of number three. If you have time to yourself, not only are you putting yourself first in the whole premise of my book, the rules, which is the 13 rules to feminine energy, embetterment, every, you know, aspect of femininity and all of that stuff. The point I want to make here, though, is not just put yourself first so others will, like, you gravitate towards you. The point I want to make here is if you don't have time to yourself, you do not have time for silence, and that means put your phone down for 10 minutes.

Those moments when you're standing in line at the shop, I want to pull my phone out, babe, I'm human. I'm addicted to scroll, scroll, scroll, I get it. But if you don't have time for yourself, you don't know how to make choices. You don't know how to listen to your feminine wisdom. you don't know how to listen to your body. Do you know how your body speaks to you? Through pain.

Hip pain, back pain, leg pain, finger pain, eyebrow pain, whatever, right? It speaks to you through pain. The body holds the score, read that book back, okay? It's on my book list on Amazon. Margaret and Azarenko, Amazon, I've got my book list on there. Do not endlessly self-sacrifice your time and deprioritize yourself for the sake of everything else and not. listen to your body. You need to have moments of silence. You don't always need to be producing

content, producing something, producing food, producing, producing, producing, because you're not going to listen to your feminine wisdom. Your body hurts for a reason. Things hurt for a reason. Listen, acute with your ear, okay? Number five, discipline. Would you rather feel the pain of discipline or the pain of regret? I decided a while ago, I would rather feel the pain of discipline. I really did not enjoy the pain of regret on not actioning some things, you know, and I would rather feel the pain of discipline. You have your zones of responsibility. You have your zones of what you can do. You show up for yourself. The idea of having confidence for me is based and predicated, not on feeling grandiose, big and larger than life, but it is more so predicated on the fact that I will show up for

myself. When I don't show up for myself, when I don't put the food into my body that I want to put into my body when I don't feel myself, my mind, my body, myself in every way, I lose confidence. Why? Because I am not confident in myself showing up for me. If I'm confident in a friend, I'm confident that she will be there for me. Same with yourself. If you don't show up with yourself, you do not have confidence in yourself. That way, you will develop it if you have discipline. That is number five. Number six, willingness to admit fault. So me slash vulnerability, because I can admit fault, but for me, vulnerability was harder to admit. I remember being at drama school, and my drama school teacher, Clive said to me, Clive.

What was his surname? Owens? Clive, Duncan? Clive? Clive Duncan. Yeah, I think that was his name. Clive Duncan. And he said to me, you know, you don't show your vulnerability. You're always trying to hide your vulnerability. And I literally did not know what that meant. That was how far away it was from me. I was like, what do you want me to do cry? Like, I cry in scenes all the time. You know, when we're acting out. cry, I don't care. I guess it was about admitting vulnerability to myself that I'm not able to do everything, that I'm not good at everything, that I'm not always okay. And I still don't really know how to do that because I have learned to be okay, you know, in every life situation. I have learned

to analyze it and be okay and walk through it with my head high, which I guess is a superpower too. But vulnerability means, you know, I don't always feel like the best things since sliced bread. And sometimes, you know, I feel down or sometimes I feel this, that, or the other. that are overwhelmed. Right now is a season of overwhelm for me. I find it hard to turn off my brain, you know, with work and young kids and, you know, life in general. But it's the willingness to say you were wrong, say you're sorry or say you are vulnerable and especially a big question that I get from women is, if I've made mistakes, how do I forgive myself? Well, therein lies the willingness to admit fault and move forward accordingly.

seven the willingness to always grow and learn this piece sits firmly in the whole notion that if you don't work then people will find you boring if you're a stay-at-home mom and i am not a stay-at-home mom despite me having my child full-time i also work which i don't know why but it's my passion i guess that's why the point being this point sits firmly in the fact that when women go to work because they are afraid that they are somehow boring to society because they're a mother, despite doing literally the most important job a woman can do, and that's raised the next generation. I do believe that, or a man can do. What purpose, what higher purpose could you possibly serve than the betterment of humanity? And if that is the cure of a disease, that is also in that category of the betterment of society

and the greater good, right? So mothers fit into that category. And the sacrificial part of it, and fathers who do that, right? So the willingness to always grow and learn means that even if you are a stay-at-home parent or a mom, if you're watching this, I guess, always being doing classes, watching development videos, always bettering yourself. And if this is not your jam like self-development,

I love it. But is it skiing or ice skating, if that's what you've always done, always improving so that you never feel that you're out of the loop or out of society so that you never feel you're on the back burner in any kind of way. And if it means having a sourdough starter, whatever that means, I hear Americans say it all the time in the fridge and make your sourdough.

And cooking is your thing, then that's your thing. But you're always having some way to grow and develop yourself. Number eight, you're a self-starter. You're a self-motivator. Nobody else needs to kick you up the ass. This is something that all divine feminine women have in common. They have an inner internal energy that they know how to switch on. this I would have to really sit down and deduce how to teach you if you want me to let me know

because it will really take me some time to really understand how to teach it. I know how to feel it, but I don't really know how to teach it yet. But the ability to see your future, manifest your future, and reward yourself and motivate yourself because you are the powerhouse of your relationships and your husband and your children. You are the one who elevates and creates, okay? So you need to be a self-starter. if people have to drag you through life, you are not in your divine feminine energy. Number nine, self-determination.

This is a tricky one. I was listening to somebody saying in a podcast that the idea of manifestation is a poisonous and a bad idea because if you believe in manifestation and everything is your fault and everything is determined by you, then it's really bad for people who have suffered from something they do not cause illnesses, etc. and, you know, and I fully agree. But I think the peace that is, I cannot deny that there's so many things that I feel I've manifested in my life, from bad to good.

It's just this undeniable force and energy of like attracting like. Now, I don't know what that means globally and I don't know what that means for every person, but I can't deny that I think there is some energy that exists in that level, right? However, the self-determination factor is of everything being your responsibility and your fault is useful as a mindset because despite it being your fault and despite it being your responsibility and despite it being up to you to solve, it is a place of power that has gotten me through a lot of things in my life from my childhood to now where I feel that if I can get through something or I have in some way caused it, I feel like I can get better. It allows me to get through life in a smoother way. I found that a lot of successful feminine energy women, instead of being a victim, say they take it on the chin and they say, this is me and I'm going to get through this,

and they have a life that is incredible. And maybe even people who have had terrible circumstances, you know, have gotten through things. And they have found that people in dire straits that make it through are the ones who have undeniable life force and that way of saying that it's on me and I can do it and take without what you will, but I prefer to think that I cause my life and I manifest it because I guess it gives me comfort and power and you should try it. Number 10, they have an I can do it mindset. Often I bump into people who say to me like, you know, be vulnerable, show that you can't do it,

you can't always do everything by yourself and I can't. I love help. Help me. Pay for me. Do my things. Do it for me. Let's hire all the people and all the help. Great, fantastic. But if I need to, I can do it. I can do it. Like, do you think that before I wrote a book, I felt like I could write a book? No. Do you think I felt like I could show up on camera? No. Do you think I felt like I could make it through things I've never shared, obviously, on platforms? But I did. And I think that the thing that these women who are very much in their power have in common is the I can do it attitude. They just can do it. There is no, I can't do it.

I just can't because I'm here and I have to. I hope that helped you. I hope you adopt some of these beliefs. We are going back to old school. We are going back to old school. I haven't been so excited for an episode. If you're watching, you will see I'm in the car because I'm about to just talk to you. My mic is not working.

I've got wires upon wires. my Apple computer is dead because I haven't charged it. You might hear all kinds of noise in the background. You might hear the car. You might hear this. You might hear that. But isn't that fitting for this episode's title? Isn't that fitting? How to stay in your feminine, a feminine, femony, Femone? How to stay in your feminine energy when life gives you lemons. Just so many lemons. Listen, you can hear the cold in my voice, yeah? I never get sick. I'm hardly ever unwelcome. well and I would turn the car off so you don't hear the buzzing but it is 30 to 30 Celsius centigrade outside okay in hot hot Australian summer so that's not going to happen but you're here for my message not for

my sound not for my location and not even for my face that is why makeup is not on it but we are here and we're actually going to talk because look I try and meet expectations when I know the true core audience and who you really are is exactly who I am. We have a vibe and we have a flow and that is you need to hear this message right now because I need to hear it. January has lasted for 57 days. It is now, you know, the third of February, but we had 57th of January. It was the longest month ever whole world. I don't know how that happened. But it's almost like I need some chapstick. I need, you know, some glycolyc acid on my face. I need to reset everything. And I got this most beautiful, beautiful Smithson journal, this beautiful, red, snakey journal in order to be like, yes, the new year is the snake.

And that is truly the new year for me, you know, the new year, the lunar new year Chinese snake. I'm doing it again at the start of February, okay? I'm looking at my notes, as always, because I've written down 10 points about all those questions that you have asked, what if I'm going through a divorce? What if I'm at a time in my life where I'm not feeling my best? What if I'm, you know, mid-weight loss journey or weight gain journey, whatever it is your flow? What if I'm in a health crisis? What if this? What if that?

And you're there jabba, jabba, jabber. Jabba, your feminine energy. Make him treat you like this. Make him treat you like that. And I'm here trying to survive, Margarita. I'm trying to survive. But guess what, ladies, and germs? I'm trying to survive.

I don't know what January's been. I feel 2025 energy is on fire. We are going to get stuff done. We are going to crush it. But we're going to crush it. it chaotically, okay? Because everything is happening. I've launched Become Her three. It's the last time it's going to launch. I'm building a community. I'll tell you about that another time. This is not the time for it, but, you know, I will put it in the description

box if you want to join. It's a community where I'm going to do Q&As and actual conversations. I'm ready. I'm ready for it. My baby's one year old. I'm ready. And I'm ready to have this rambling chat with you. I want to bring you the things that you love, but I also, I want to do this for me. I heard you. I know a lot of you don't like on YouTube, the guest interviews. A lot of you do on audio. So I'm going to figure it out. Let me figure it out. Okay. Samantha, please. But in the meantime, I want you to know that everybody goes through abs and flows when it comes to chaotic lives, yeah. I've never had such a chaotic period in my life. I'm building a house. My management wants me to go to Chimerica, to Chimedica, to Chimedica, to Chiammedica, to

do interviews and, you know, promote what I'm doing and all this stuff. And I'm like, listen, it's a lot. I'm launching. I'm building the book. Everything is going on. And I've got two children. And I know how you feel. And I know how you feel not only because this season's so busy for me. I know how you feel because I've been in times where my life was a cluster fluff in ways that weren't positive. I said to my friend, you know, she goes, I don't know how you do it. And I said, do what? I do this. through gratitude because I am acutely aware of how damn lucky I am. Every hardship I have at the moment is a lucky one. Oh no, she gets to put her healthy children to bed. It's so difficult to solo parent because her husband is outbuilding their house and working. All those things are positive.

They're not easy necessarily, but they're positive, yeah? People actually go, and my car started, thank you. People actually going through hardships, okay? Through which I have also gone through. If you've read my book, you know them. You don't know all of them, you know, some of them. Some of them I would never probably speak on because irrelevant and it involves people that probably, you know, it's in the past. But I want you to know that point number one about being in your feminine energy and in your softness in which I am not talking at the moment. I am talking in a very animated, energetic way because I've just been in my masculine because I've got a cold, I've got this, I've got that. I'm pushing at every cylinder, but I am going to tell this information to you as much as I am to

myself. But this one, you've got to understand. Number one, acknowledge that life won't always be soft and that is okay. I know some of you write down the points down in my comments, so a person that does that, go ahead. Go ahead. Number one, acknowledge that life won't always be soft and that is okay. The misconception about feminine energy is that it's always got to be soft. It's got to be I'm going to turn off the car to really home in the point. It's always going to be soft. It's always got to be flowing. It's always got to be whimsical. We're always going to be baking sour dough. We're always got to be flying with the fairies. Piss off. That's not the reality. Feminine energy is not perfect. You understand that the concept of feminine energy, feminine and masculine means being

of this world. Masculine and feminine energies are of this world. Feminine energy involves hardships like being a mum or, you know, birthing your children or loss or it's all a part of it. It's not airy, fairy, Instagram, curated feed. That's not what feminine energy is, okay? It's about how you navigate through imperfection. It is about how you carry through your life. Yes, I understand and you're going through a divorce. Yes, I understand it was not fair that he isn't text you back and he's left you. I understand, but how you move through it with grace

is feminine energy. Have you ever watched that movie, Shokala, with Johnny Depp? That woman, how she moves from town to town with her kid. She's full of feminine energy. There is something about her that is magnetic and dynamic and beautiful, and I need to turn my car on again because it's 30 degrees outside, and we cannot live like this.

But there is something that is just, main character energy about how she lives her life. It is insanely beautiful, inspiring, gorgeous, stunning, all those things. It is not about having the perfect life. There is something almost like exciting about having to build from nothingness. Sometimes when the Phoenix crashes, you know that the next part is it rising and that is the essence of feminine energy. You don't have to be in a high vibe, yes, queen, yes, girl, go off mode constantly. No. It's about authenticity, softness, patience. I put my daughter down, she was up three hours at night.

I get hardly any sleep at the moment. I don't know what those raccoons are on. Like they're trying to murder me through sleeplessness, right? But the point is that when I'm putting my son to bed, it's about stopping. And in that moment, I know he wants me to sing to him for an hour and I've got black nose and I can't breathe and I'm about suffocate through the fact that I can't breathe

but I'm singing, twinkle, twinkle, little star. Understanding that I'm wanted by somebody. I'm needed and I'm loved and these are my children and they are amazing. And that is the essence truly of a feminine energy and stopping in the moment, okay, knowing that it's, sometimes it's a mess. Sometimes it's a mess. But that's okay. Number two.

Releasing the guilt of not feeling the best. So many women feel like they're failing if their hair isn't done, their thing isn't there she's not slay queen you understand that advertising is trying to sell you an image you understand that advertising is trying to sell you an image of how your hair should be shiny your butt should be high your this should be that your dealt should be please stop we're human you get this one lovely beautiful life that that is just to be cherished and worshipped truly once once it happens once that you're born the chances of you being born as you are just so give me the chills, like goosebumps when I think about it.

You have to have reverence for your existence. You know, trying to find balance and all this BS that you're fed and, you know, do this, do that, Pilates, stop. Feminine energy isn't about beauty and ease. It's about allowing yourself to rest, heal, and being able to be in the stillness of life and bringing peace to yourself. Because masculine is about being driven and full. word, feminine is about the opposite of that. And that is what I'm trying to remind myself,

because this is truly the most exciting time of my life. I am so needed by my business, by you, by my children, by my partner, partner, yucky word, strange word. Husband, the reason I say partner is yucky word, because, like, you have a business partner, you have a life partner, like, partner is just like a bleh word, like, lesbian, more descriptive. number three prioritizing micro moments of softness you have to when everything feels so chaotic and so diabolical prioritize micro moments when life is chaotic you don't need a full skincare routine every day every day you need small moments of softness for example drink your tea slowly light a candle choose one small action to nourish yourself daily and what i mean by that i

my son like talks a hundred times a minute, a second, almost. I used to just rush through the day, always trying to attend to my emails, this and that in the morning, I now make that effort, I know shocker, to just make a cup of coffee and be like, Mommy will be there in a second, baby, and enjoy it. Anchor those small moments, those small rituals, do those acts of softness that will, I call them anchor, they will anchor you into who you are in your feminine energy, okay?

Next, fight or flight mode. You need to shift out of fight or flight. And a lot of us are living there. A lot of us are living there because a lot of us were told that we are equal to men, yet we do a lot more than men, right? We're equal because now we can work where they work, we can do what they do, but somehow we've ended up with doing a lot more than they do. How? I don't know.

And if you're a man in the comments and you're about to tell me, me, no, we do more. I understand. You do more. You're working in the minds. I understand. I understand. I really empathize with you, Jacob. But what I'm talking about is on the domestic everyday level for the women that are listening to this. The mental load. The amount we've taken on and understanding that in these chaotic moments that you can, you know, you can, what is that word? Delegate, delegate, but we'll talk about that later. we'll talk about first is shifting out of fight or flight like it's intense right stress of everyday life of what we put ourselves under because we got told that we can do it all by ourselves with no help creates masculine survival mode overthinking pushing through because we live where we live where ladies and jams in a masculine world built for men so we are living the male way so if we are

succeeding in this world it is masculine my business despite it being about feminine energy runs in a masculine way. So to reset into softness, gentle movement, deep breath, slow down speech, and let yourself receive in small ways. If someone's offering your help to help them, sorry, if someone's offering to help you, take it. Even on two days a week, I have somebody help me with my children so that I can make content, not children, one of my children, so I can make content and be with my other child, right? Even then, I try and help the nanny be there despite paying for her services. Like, we cannot delegate.

Just, we can't, as women, we're just always on. And that's such a masculine thing to do. Understand that motherhood and everything that we're doing and every way that we're juggling is in a masculine mode. So if anyone ever offers you help, say yes. Number five. Staying feminine when you are low and low. money time or energy. This sounds tricky, but truly you don't need luxury spa days to be

feminine. Like I said, feminine is an energy, it's an experience, a mortal, energetic experience, and you can still embody it if you choose. But if you want to do the glow-up habits, there are feminine energy glow-up habits that means just looking after yourself that don't cost anything. Hydration. Marguerite, I'm talking to you. Good posture for the prawn in the back, prorning over her laptop. You know, you are a prowling predator like cat. You are not a succubus prawn on the bottom of the floorbed of the ocean, okay? Mindful breathing, choosing softness over reactivity. If you imagine some kind of tribal woman, whichever tribe you're imagining, be it Africa, be it Scandinavia, be it Celtic,

whatever tribal woman you connect with, she's sitting there, she's not clouching over like a prawn, nor does she have lots of time, money or resources because we could die at any point in tribal living back in the day, okay? You die from a toothache. But if you imagine her, there's some prowess to her body. If you don't have time, money, or energy, practice the way you walk and in your posture embodying that feminine warrior woman because sometimes the feminine means being a warrior and if you're in a divorce or if you're going through a shit time then it's time for that warrior queen to come out if you've got my journal that's one of the archetypes is that warrior that hunter it's not oh my god braid my hair no no no no it's not just softness being a woman forget

feminine energy being a woman means sometimes being very assertive. Today I had to get my son who's standing behind a gate in a certain club that he went to and there was nowhere to pick him up and he's standing outside the gate and I had to chuck my car quickly in a safe area but you're not allowed to stand there for a long time. Put my car there. He's about to cut out the gate. And then Karen comes, excuse me, you're not allowed to park there. I go, yeah, I'm just getting him literally one second. I'm so sorry I'm going to. No, I'm reporting you. to who? Report yourself to God, woman. Report yourself for not having a life and being here in my business. Anyway, I get him and put him in my car. The point being is that you need to stay valid to

yourself, okay, to who you are. A woman is also a mother and you know if you mess with a mother bear, you will not have a face for a very long time. I'm getting my child. He's standing behind the gate, Karen. I don't care what you're doing. I don't care what you're saying. I don't care who you are. Where I'm parking is questionable and it's not up to you to decide. It's not dangerous. Maybe I can park here. Have you read all the road rules? Piss off. Anyway. So it's not always about flowers in the hair. Number six, the power of leaning into intuition over control. This one's a deep one. Control and trying to control people around you really puts you into masculine energy to pushing and driving and makes you a very ugly woman. I said it. It makes you

an ugly woman. It makes you very unattractive when you try and control him. Men in your life, it makes you exhausted when you try and control everyone. And I know they're going to do everything wrong, but you need to let people be wrong and live their own lives. You are not the God of everything. When life feels out of control, leaning into feminine energy and surrendering and not forcing is the key. The whole concept of feminine energy is about surrender. And the whole reason I learned about it and leaned into it is because I come from a very anxious attachment style. I came from a very anxious attachment style and it only healed me when I decided to act secure

before I became it and not only that but I learned about feminine energy and I just said, let people do what they want to do. I'd rather find out who you are quicker rather than later, sooner rather than later. I don't want to manufacture a world around me that isn't real, that doesn't exist because I want to control you to the point where I don't get hurt because I tell you, exactly what to do and you go around like a dog on a leash doing what I want you to do because God forbid you're going to hurt me. No, you be you and I will be the judge of whether I want you to be in my life or not. Surrendering to life and surrendering to the reality of people

is the key to feminine energy. Burned out, not burnt out. Hardship, not, no hardship. That's the power of feminine energy. It's not about being a fairy in a garden, okay? Ask yourself, if I trusted life more instead of trying to control everything, what would my life look like. Your mantra after this video is I trust myself to make the right decision. I trust myself. I trust myself. It's a really hard curve to learn. Number seven, the art of receiving even in hard times. Sometimes when life is hard, we get, and I guess it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Sometimes I see the people who need the most help are the most resistant to receiving it. Like I said with my nanny or people who help me, I will stride through and do everything my things.

myself. Many women struggle with receiving. They don't want to receive help, kindness, offers of gestures, compliments even. If you are in that state, learn to see yourself as a creature that is wonderful and that deserves help. And if anything, seeing your inner child is really important. I go into it in my book, the new rules. When you see yourself through the lens of somebody that is your inner child and you do the exercise of returning to yourself when you were a child and becoming the adult who could help you, it's a really endearing process. You might not like yourself as an adult, but that inner you who's a child really deserves everything and more. Let someone hold the door for you. Accept help with no guilt and don't apologize constantly,

because that's killing your feminine energy. Number eight, using beauty and rituals to reconnect to yourself. Rituals and routines and beauty routines aren't just used by women throughout history and time in order to beautify themselves. It is also in order to worship at the altar of feminine energy, which is you. Goddesses have rituals, they have routines, and the way to anchor yourself, anchor yourself into feminine energy is through these rituals. Things like brow wax, tinted lip balm, even, or soft fabric, cozy textures, even if you're in a way in a part of life where you don't enjoy your body and I'll go into it more how my mindset shift has allowed me to be in a body that I am comfortable with and for a long time I wasn't and weight loss and muscle building and all that

stuff but we'll go into it you still need to push through and to put soft fabrics on yourself put in jewelry you like even if you are not in the place where you look like you want to look okay understand this is number nine that rest is productive I'm talking to myself right now understand that rest is productive. No, it's not. Understand that rest is productive. Masculine conditioning says that you are lazy if you don't produce, produce, produce. You are not lazy if you don't produce. Feminine creates, it doesn't produce, okay? And if creativity doesn't flow today, then it's not flowing today, then we're not creating anything. Truly, I mean that from the bottom of my heart. The masculine paradigm, they don't have hormonal shifts like us.

They don't follow the lunar cycle. They have the same hormones every day, unless something else is going on with them, but that's not the usual. The work and world, the 9 to 5 is built for men because every day they can perform 9 to 5 and then they take a two-day break. We can't function like that.

No, we can't. No, we can't, Samantha. You are not lazy if you rest. You're in tune with your body if you rest. Feminine energy says, my body and my mind thrive when I honor my cycle and when I follow my cycle. Dr. Mindy Peltz talks a lot. about this. Resting when needed actually allows you to glow up. I feel fully burnt out right now,

me personally. I don't feel burnt out in life. I feel like I'm about to get on track. For me, it was the Christmas period and having my son home who is a high energy dog. You know how there's dogs that are different, like bulldogs and terriers. My son's like a high energy, high emotion terrier. So, yeah, my mom. My mum was also here visiting, like, I'm so fulfilled when it comes to love, but also burnt out. But if I rest, I'll be fine, and I know that acutely, accurately. Number 10, self-compassion as the ultimate energy hack. So self-compassion is the ultimate energy hack.

You don't have to be perfect, feminine, radiant, sexy, amazing. The more you soften towards yourself, the more you understand and revere your humanity, your beauty. Let me just talk to you for a minute. I'm just going to even close my notes because I've had enough of you people who are mothers who talk about, oh, I'm just a mom, I'm just to stay at home, mum, I'm just to, how dare you, first of all, say that. You've literally created human life. Thank you, Carr for turning off while I say this. You've literally created human life with what is your body and you have the audacity to say things like, oh, I don't contribute 50%, oh, I don't this, I don't that. It is the most,

biggest travesty in the entire world, that perhaps the most important thing, and that is giving someone life, if men could give people life, they would walk around like God. They would walk around like God. The closest thing to God is a woman, because God and you can make life. Yeah. You need to respect it, you need to revere it, this one life you have. Stop trying to produce things, which is something taught to us by the Industrial Revolution, that every person's only useful if they produce something, production, production. It's a factory mindset. And it's good, it's good to get women working because it's good to make women work because then it's bigger workforce and I love that. I love that. I love to work. I think about my podcast and everything I'm doing a lot, but that's a passion.

It's a creativity that I have. But please do not feel that you are less than or you're not doing enough by not being productive every day. Rest, rituals, and self-respect, reverence. And if you're going through a hard time where you've been made to feel like you're not the best version of yourself, like a divorce, or you, also the women who say, I've got kids, who's going to love me? Babe, he would love you? Even with your husband, if your husband was still there. There is no problem with finding a man if you have babies. Do not let those male podcasts tell you this nonsense. You have value. You are high value. You are life force itself. And you've made life already. So please. Do not look down on yourself. You have children when it comes to dating and how you have going to date again? Ridiculous. And I'm older. How am I going to date again? Ridiculous. There's always men are older than you, yeah? I joke, but you know what I mean? Anyway, thank you for watching.

If you're listening, if the audio isn't great, tough titties, we just have to move, you know? We have to be where we are. We have to do what we do. And right now, I think what I'm going to do is have two days of journaling. I haven't been able to write in my Red Snake journal and just breathe. You know? And children are great teachers. My son at the moment is always like, mum, watch this, watch this, watch this, because I think he sees how my mind is tuned out and it's got a hundred things going on at the moment. And sometimes you just got a mum watch this, you know what I mean?

Today we're going to talk about what a feminine energy woman never does because she knows that this stuff is just not the vibes. She doesn't do this stuff. I'm so excited to talk to you today. We're on episode 56. I sound like a harried shrew. Like this is one of the things that a feminine energy woman never does because she knows that these things deplete her energy. They take her energy and I am doing it. But at the same time, I am in a mode right now where everything is at 100 miles. If you are watching this on YouTube, my house looks like a mess. If you could see it, actually if you could see behind the camera, you would see that it's an absolute disaster.

And I had to choose today between blow drying my hair, but we liking the natural vibes. The hair is, you know, herring. It's just the natural texture of the hair. We have to choose all these different things. I've just managed to put my handheld child, my handheld baby, who's always handheld. I don't know what it is. I mean, she loves me. That's cool.

We love that for her. We love that for me. Honestly, she's a blessing this kid. And we're recording this podcast. I am feeling both incredibly grateful and incredibly flustered. You know, the juxtaposition between the two is incredible and there is so much I want to say and there's so much I want to divulge and I'm on one hand grateful. On one hand, I've got so much I want to share with you and tell you.

And mainly the fact that, let's take a sip of this tea. Or maybe it's wine. No, it's tea. You can see the tea bag. Mainly the thing that I really want to say is how appreciative I am. for everyone who's pre-ordered my audiobook. There's been some hiccups in the works in terms of getting help looking after the kids, recording this audio book.

It's going to be on Audible. It's going to be on Audible. Guys, the amount of times I sat down and looked at Audible and thought, wow, imagine having a book on there one day. By the way, for everyone who thinks I'm doing all that, chatting a lot, I'll put down in the description box below when the Feminine Energy Rules start. and for those of you in the podcast, I'll try and do that in the description box as well. But I feel like we're friends and I want to catch you up. This month, I'm going to have a lot of content on my YouTube channel.

So if you're just watching, if you're just listening to this on the podcast, I'd encourage you to hop on over with your little bunny butt onto my YouTube channel because I'm having bonus content every week. So let's talk about what a feminine energy woman never does, because we talk a lot about what she does. but I think it's a good thing to talk about what she never does. I have them written on my phone here, so let's go. She understands that what you reflect, you attract.

It's easy to want to react to situations as opposed to act, but because a feminine energy woman who is truly in her power, in her essence, in her scrummy, yummy manifesting energy, she understands that if she surrounds, well, it's a twofold thing. If she surrounds herself with people who do not create a positive, reaction in her, then she will be depleted of her feminine energy, but she also understands that it's up to her to raise her vibration and react to things. You need to understand that you control your reality by controlling your reactions. This took me so long to understand. It took me so long to truly get that,

because I used to think when I was younger, yeah, but how can I react neutrally to things that are really insulting or really mean or say my partner treats me badly or my friend doesn't reply to me or somebody is really antagonizing and I will just tell you an example on the weekend that I've had. I had to do my final book approvals. I had to record content for three different companies. The person who was supposed to help me look after my kids while I recorded the audio book canceled. It was all just going crazy and I had emails building up, building up, building up, building up on my email inbox, whatever it's called, and I had my two kids in the weekend. There is nothing I love more than my two children on the weekend. And my husband was working on our new house. We're renovating

a house. I want my house ready. So he's there and that's fine. That's a choice we make. My son's a spirited chihuahua. Yes, he is. And he was doing all kinds of his spirited raccoon behavior, you know, because he's a toddler. And we went to a play center and all these emails were coming through and phone calls were coming through, mind you, it's a Saturday. And I'm trying to call people to find out when they're available to help me for the next week so I can change the dates. And it was all just a hot mess express. And I realized my flustered reaction and my lack of groundedness and being in the moment,

because what can I really do? What can I do to facilitate anything changing in that moment? I can't. I just have to be in the moment. And what did I always want is people around me who love me and who I love in return. and these children in this moment love me and want me more than anything else. My daughter and my son, to them, I am the world. To them, I am the coolest person, and that's not going to last and it's not going to be forever.

As much as I love you guys, you can live without a video from me, or as much as I love my book, and I was looking at it yesterday, complete, finalized, and everything, and I was reading through it just to make sure the chapters are what I wanted them to be titled because it's the new rules and the rules are in there and I want them to be strong and transmit what I want to say. But I chose not to react, Flustered. I chose to completely put my phone down. I chose to completely fold in whatever I was doing and be present with my kids in that moment. A feminine energy woman, we confuse feminine energy about she put a skirt on, she did her hair right, she did all this.

I chose to be in my playful energy and be with my children and be a kid in that day. We stayed in that play center all day. they were happy. They, you know, we played, what are those called, arcade games, my son climbed, my cup was full. And if things went to the, not to the wayside, but if things went unperfected and unrefined, that's okay. And it's the same with people who might hurt your feelings. It's the same with people who might not return your phone calls. Be present in the moment and understand that your reaction and your queenly energy is, you are

the powerhouse of your whole dynamic and everybody who is in your life. You are the epicenter of how things go in your life, the men in your life, the children in your life. You are the emotional center of everything. The equivalent of the house is the kitchen and how you react to things and how you cultivate that emotionality is everything. Create your internal world. Fill yourself with gratitude and this goes back to what I just spoke about with my kids. A feminine energy woman never fixates on criticizing, complaining, and holding a grudge. Now, let's break those down. A feminine energy woman outside of these things that you might hear on TikTok or everywhere else about dark, feminine, light feminine, Labrador energy, Black Cat energy. Have you noticed about that whole Labrador and Black Cat

example? The Black Cat being independent, emotionally safe within herself, holds herself up in a poised way, and the Labrador being the energy that you don't want to be, and that is chasing a man, doing everything for him, please please notice me, that kind of energy. What you need to also understand, it's not just about those things. And those things are very good to explain, kind of what feminine energy is, and especially dark feminine energy. But the grounded feminine energy is if you take yourself as a being in an entity, you cannot be inspiring and draw good things to you and have the reactions you want if you're

constantly criticizing. Criticizing means you're not focusing on yourself. It means the spotlight of who you are is not on. you means that you're not cultivating something in yourself, but you are reacting to other things. That is criticizing. Complaining is the next one. Again, it's something out of yourself. It's something about other people. You're trying to change the state of other people in order to change yourself. You are trying to, through the manipulation of other people, make yourself feel better when truly it should be you who radiates that energy. And next is holding a grudge. Holding a grudge,

and that kind of like pouty little girl behavior, as I've grown up, I've realized is truly the opposite of feminine energy. When a woman in her feminine is upset about something, she's upset in a grounded and secure way. She says, I'm upset. I don't like that. In the past, when someone would treat me in a way that I didn't like or I'd see that they're off with me, let's say a friend, I would also start to pout at them or there's a lot of things online about, you know, give them the same energy. he gives you. But do you have time for that? If he's breadcrumbing you and then he appears, then he disappears, he's there, he's gone, he's everywhere and you start to emulate the same energy back and hold a grudge and be absurd and you're pouting, how much of your life are you wasting? Because at the

end of the day that that man is probably not going to be the man who's for you, with you, or who goes through life with you. That's not going to be the man for you. So tell me, when you're spending your time playing these games and complaining to your friends about him and pouting and all, you know, showing your character and like, he's upset me and now he's going to pay. The only person you're hurting is yourself because he likes these games. It's like trying to throw mud at a pig. He's going to like it and you're going to get dirty. Okay. Feminine energy, a woman, she never talks about criticizing and holding grudges and all that stuff to people. She talks about ideas, dreams, and not gossip. And I know you've probably seen these on like posters of like, you know,

great people talk about ideas and petty people talk about other people. But truly, you will change your vibration and you will change how much is attracted to you and you will change how you reverberate energetically in this world by changing that one thing. Start to talk about ideas and dreams. Start to think and write about ideas and dreams. Start to concentrate on those things, if you are concentrating on your man's behavior and criticizing him constantly as opposed to knowing perhaps it's not for you, if it's that detrimental, then you are truly wasting your energy and you're really digging it in mud when you should be in the clouds, you know, as a woman. The next thing that a feminine energy woman understands about energy is

when you want something really bad and you get frustrated and then you get mad about not getting that thing, that is a sure-fired. a sign that you are not ready for that thing that you're requesting. For example, if you want money, or if you want a certain career, or if you want to elevate yourself in a certain way, and it's not happening, you really need to sit down with yourself and write a stream of consciousness of all the things you want or that specific thing you want. Let's say you want to make a certain amount of money. Let's say it's 200,000 in a year, Australian or, I don't know, 150,000 American, whatever it is from your business.

And it's just not working. And I've been in that situation where I've had money blocks, crazy money blocks. And if you haven't listened to my previous podcast, I think it's two podcasts ago or two YouTube videos ago about attracting money and abundance. It's called Rich Bitch, Attract Money and Abundance. Those pivotal keys about attracting money are really, really something. And go and listen to that after this video. But what I'm going to share with you is what is meant for you will find you.

what is meant for you will find you. And let's say you want that career, but it's not happening. You need to stream and sit down what it is you want. And then you need to, on another piece of paper, write down what it is you think that that will gain you, but also what that will take away from you. And I'm not exactly 100% sure what my exact money blocks were, but I will tell you one thing that one of them was, and that is I was afraid that if I was, I make money, I will become independent or hyper-independent and not reliant on my partners, and therefore I will take less ship from them, and therefore I will walk if I have financial means, not that I relied on them completely, but let's say I'm renting a house with my partner,

let's say with my ex-partner, we were renting a place. What stopped me often with behaviors that I didn't like from leaving is even though I was working and he was working equally at the time, So it's not even the rhetoric of like, oh, he supports you so you'll be stuck. No, often people are stuck because they both pay for the same house that they're living in, you know. And it was just stopping me to go, well, you know, we need each other so it's easier to stay with him. And it would, there would be a feeling of safety and security and ask yourself, is there something you're gaining by blocking yourself? Is there something you're gaining by not losing the extra weight that you gained and that you don't feel comfortable in? Is there something you're gaining?

by not having the muscle tone that you want and not going to the gym. Is there something you're gaining by not having the business that makes money? It could be something as simple as it will take you away from your friends and you won't be as available because baby, you won't be available. My two best friends have been texting me off the hook asking me when I can meet up with them. I can't meet up with them. Ever since my business has taken off, I can't meet up with them. Do you know that doesn't feel great?

And one day it will turn around and I will want to see them again and it will be fantastic. But right now I can't. is that something that is blocking you? For me, not a lack of money, but making average low income in my 20s made me feel safe to the fact that I was attached to my partners, that I needed them, or that perhaps, you know, with later boyfriends, I felt like, oh, they make more money than me and I respect them for making more money. But then what if I make money or even more money than them, where will my respect for them come from? And that was something that I grappled with and only overcame after I had children. Why? Because after I had children, the idea of making money actually

inspired me and gave me more tenacity because I wanted to do something for my kids. I wanted, I wanted more to give my kids a fun Christmas or things that they want or know that I can send them to a school I want. And if I need to look after them by myself, less something happened. I don't, Not that it would, knock on wood, but, you know, I wanted that security for my children more than I wanted to feel codependent on someone, see, because when I wasn't making my money, I felt like I had to put up with shit and be codependent on people. But my want to provide for my children was higher than my want for the other thing. You need to sit down and ask yourself, what is it that you're blocking yourself from and why? What is it gaining you? What's it benefiting to you to do that?

why are you doing that? Because in that you will find the truth because what is meant for you will find you. And unless you find the key to that and find the true motivation, when you find the true motivation, it is like you're on a boat and you've pulled up the anchor and the sail is in the right direction and you are just full steam ahead. It cannot go wrong. The universe opens up doors for you. But until you do that, it will feel like you're paddling on a boat, the anchors down, the wind is blowing the other way and you can't move the dang boat. Because Because resistance is real and the resistance is often coming from inside yourself. Feminine energy women understand that if you focus your energy on your minuses as opposed to on what you have as benefits and pluses, you will create more minuses. It's almost like what you lean into grows. Like if you imagine it energetically, if I think about my negative aspects, it will almost magnify and amplify. If I think about my positive aspects, it will magnify and amplify.

We're raised in culture, let's say at school where if you're getting minuses and D's and math and you're getting A's in English, they will give you a math tutor. Whilst I'm imploring you to maybe, maybe get yourself an English tutor and become the best writer you can as opposed to an average mathematician and an average writer. True feminine women know that the wolf you feed grows, yeah? And the wolf you don't feed, starves. It's not to say that you should be an awful person and not work on your mind. minuses and on your character. But what I mean is if you have deficits that you feel you have in

your looks or you have deficits that you feel you have in how you present to the world, whatever it is, as long as it's not hurting anyone, don't focus on those things. I saw this woman who had gained weight to become 120 kilos. Now, I'm no doctor or weight expert, but she said these words. she said, I was 60 kilos having gained three kilos from being 58 kilos. I don't know what it is in pounds. You can translate it. Guys, I'm not that clever. Yeah, I told you I got diesel math.

And she goes, well, this is where losing weight got me to. I just wanted to lose two kilos, which is like, I don't know, four pounds or something, from 60 to 58 one summer. And this is where losing weight got me to. And it struck me as so true because she was leaning into her negative aspect. she was 58 kilos, gained 2 kilos, was concentrating on it so much that she's now 120 and obese and unhealthy and I believe she, her doctor told her to lose weight and she's like, look, where that's got me, she wasn't focusing on the positives, like maybe she cooks really well,

maybe she makes amazing food, maybe she can, maybe she's incredible at things, but all she was focusing on is the weight that she's gained and the negative aspect and therefore it gets you into a cycle of negativity about yourself. You see what I'm saying? And feminine energy women know that what they lean into and what they focus on amplifies. Feed the wolf you want to grow. If you're not feeding the positive wolf, you're going to feed the negative wolf, and the negative wolf will get massive.

A key fact that you really need to remember is that charismatic woman and a charismatic person is somebody who is okay with their negative aspects. You know, you sometimes see that woman come into your vicinity or somewhere and you're like, wow, she is incredible. I wish I was like her. There's something she's emulating and there's a part of you that knows intrinsically. It's not because she looks like Madison Beer or whatever her name is. She's not this incredible, you know, symmetrical Kylie Janna-faced woman. There is just something about her and I think the key to that.

And as you go through life, this is really useful because you're not always going to have your looks. your youth and all these things. What is really charismatic and incredibly beautiful is someone who's comfortable with their negative aspects but does not lean into them. I want you to use this by writing out your superpowers as a list of affirmations. Often we use a list of affirmations in the form of what you are going to be or what you are going to achieve or what you want to be, even in manifestation. You write it out as, I am beautiful, I am flexible, I am athletic, whatever it is. Why don't we just start with your superpower list? Why don't we start with a superpower list of things you already possess so that you can lean into them so that you can walk through this life with

some kind of confidence? Because once you feel that taste of confidence, you are going to want to do other things that also amplify you and make you feel confident. You're going to want to lean into that also. And until you feel that, it's going to be difficult for you to know what else you are capable of. write that list of the things that you can already see as aspects of yourself that are incredible and call it your superpower list and use that as a list of affirmations. Suffering and conflict as opposed to focusing on gratitude and the bigger mission for a feminine energy woman is something that she would never do. When you have a lack of purpose and mission, it could be raising your children in a really good way,

it could be writing a book, I'm just using that example because I wrote one, or it could be keeping your home in a really beautiful aesthetic way. It could be supporting your husband. It could be running a company. It could be starting a philanthropy, whatever it is. If you don't have that bigger goal, you start to scroll online. You start to negatively spiral about things. You obsess about things.

You get really into this obsessive mentality. Why? Let me give you a food example. When you don't have the classic, let's say three or whatever it is you want to do, wholesome, incredible, nutritious meals a day, what do you do? Because you're depleted in energy, you start to snack on junk food. It's the same with your mentality. A feminine energy woman who's really in her queen energy, she knows that if she's not replenishing her body with incredible vegetables, proteins, fruits, whatever it is that she's chosen to eat as something that makes her feel

good, I can't tell you what makes you feel good. You need to do that. She starts to snack on junk. and if you see yourself fixating what some random person thinks about you online or focusing on things that are really none of your business and by that I mean what cousin Judy thinks about you you can't control what Judy thinks why you even thinking about Judy so if you are starting to live the junk food lifestyle you need to understand that you need to start replenishing yourself with good food when you're starting to eat those chips and shit from your pantry you need to understand that your body is lacking vital nutrients in which you're looking for. I think it's a really good metaphor, and I'm not talking about nutrition now.

I hope you understand. I'm talking about things that you need to focus on. A feminine energy woman who is in her higher calling knows that she's not going to be focusing on other people's conflicts and all this stuff and creating suffering for herself, which absolutely doesn't exist, focusing on what somebody thinks of her, for example. when you allow that junk food lifestyle to be a part of your life, you're filling in a void. If you are fixating on people's thoughts about you, you need to understand that there is a void that you now need to fill. You need to learn. You need to research. You need to look outside of

yourself and find out what is it that you can fill your life with that has a bigger meaning. Write down what you want to do. What is it that you want in your life? Also, write down a list of your habits, your junk food habits, and write down the list of things you want to achieve. And that is the surefire, crystal clear way of understanding if you are on mission and almost like hashtag on brand in your life. Because if you've got all these junk food habits speaking spiritually, right, and lifewise, if you're just doing all these things, negative, negative, conflict, conflict, bickering trolls, whatever. If you're trolling yourself, I don't know anyone who does, but I suppose it's a secret hobby, isn't it? If you're doing that, you need to write down the list of these things that you're doing,

bad habits, food, whatever, waking up randomly, not on time, you know what I mean, and write down the list of goals that you've set for yourself. I know you have those goals. I know you have those goals to make a certain amount of money or to have a family or to have children and ask yourself, does this list over here lead to these goals over here? I'm going to tell you that if it aligns, carry on doing those habits. If it does not cut them out. Next. Very important. Let's take a sip of tea to celebrate. Getting through those points. Women who are in their high purpose, high-calling, feminine energy,

really in their ground in this queen energy, do not let weak men into their lives. And everyone's going to rebuke me now and be like, weak men, what do you mean weak men, men? They mean, it means that you don't take on projects because I've never heard a truer saying then men hope the woman they meet never changes and a woman hope that the man she meets changes everything about himself. So women spend all the time trying to make this average random man

who she's taken on like some kind of charity change into something she wants. I don't know why she chose him in the first place or she does is try and change him. Depletes his whole sense of self and he now doesn't want to change, doesn't know who he is. He's lying there like a slub on the couch, confused, not taking any action. But this woman has chosen him as a project. Women in their don't choose men as projects. They choose men who already match them. Men who are with a purpose, who know what they're doing. If you've chosen a man and you're trying to change him, you're not in your feminine energy. They don't waste their time trying to change a man. They choose a man the way they want him to be. And I don't mean like you want to be married to a millionaire.

Some women do, let's say it's that. I don't mean that you at 20 years old need to marry a 24 year old millionaire. I'm sure you can, but that's not what it means. I'm not saying you, You can't be with a man on his journey. And it's great to be with a man on his journey. It's fantastic. What I mean is don't choose a man who you want to change, but more so don't choose a weak man that you've got to carry. If you feel you've got to carry your man,

you've got the equilibrium wrong. And last but not least, and I think this one is really important, is a feminine energy woman knows that there is a higher power, that she can manifest, she believes in the sense of magic in the world, that she knows that energy will flow through her. And if there's a fluidity to her energy,

that things will manifest easily, she believes in her feminine power, the essence of belief that even if you don't believe in God, let's say you are, I can't even remember what the word is. Why is my language gone? But basically, if you don't have any beliefs, and you just believe that you're born and die, you need to start believing in some kind of higher

energetic power because it allows you, whether it is right or wrong, to bring things forward towards you. Perhaps I'm trying to communicate to you the fact that if you believe, there is a science to believe, if you believe, things will, doors will open for you. I promise you. And if you get those anchors out of the way. If you make that a reality in your head that mountains will part for you, all of human beings, storylines and everything. I watched Moana for the first time in my life. Why I'm so late to the game, I don't know why. But you know the way the sea parts for her to find the heart of magic, whatever it's called. Basically, if you believe in magic, the world will move its curtains open for you to enter the sea.

stage of life. And you've got to believe that you can manifest and hold that energy. For everybody who pre-ordered my book, I love you the most. For everyone who watches this content, I love you the second most. Thank you so much for being here, for listening, for being a part of the journey. And I'm so excited to hear what you think about this episode, to hear what you think about the podcast. It's one of those days. It's one of those moments, mornings, whatever it is, where I just want to sit down with you and I've written down some ideas that I want you to understand. I want you to understand on your journey to becoming her high value, the person you want to be. Whatever, whatever lingo you want to use, I want to talk to you about it.

If you're watching this, you'll see my microphone doesn't have a stand. You will see that I'm Hot Mess Express. But you know what? It is what it is. And if you want to get to the points quicker, if you're watching this, you can go down and find the points below in the time stamps. And if not, and if you're here for a chat and for a vibe, then here I am. And I know I like to listen to people just chat and vibes. So I'm going to tell you these pointers. But first I'm going to tell you that my daughter is six months old and she's waking up every

hour at night. Okay, it's disrespectful. It's rude. It is all of the above. So here I am living on the precipice of, you know, it's like Mount Everest, climbing Mount Everest. It's one of those times in life where you will be on this trajectory and journey one time and you are just living life on the edge, you know, you understand that life right now feels delirious, but also it's the time you will feel most needed and most vital in your life, okay? So here I am. This is me. Me, the real me. These concepts will help you become high value or these concepts will help you become her, but also will help you become her is my eight week. I am so excited. My eight week course called Become Her. Harness your feminine energy. It is coming out on the 22nd

of July. You've got to register before then. If you're not registered and you did not get in, you don't get to do the eight weeks. In the description box or wherever you can find it, go on to my website, margueriteanazarenko.com, yours truly. Number one, don't criticize, don't sulk, don't hold a grudge. These, principles. It's almost like, you know, there's principles to Christianity, there's principles to Buddhism. This is the principles to become her, okay? These principles are vital that you don't criticize, don't sulk, and you don't hold a grudge. These things are true essential elements to femininity. They are truly essential to femininity because these things sometimes get confused

with being a good girl. Like, the guy's going to like you more if you don't complain, if you don't sulk, if you don't hold a grudge, all these things, right? They get confused with like being a good girl, but they're not. They are energetically vital and pivotal for you to be a woman that attracts energetically all the good things in your life. You need to try this in your life and see how things change. Never complain, never explain. Don't criticize. Don't be like, why are you wearing that? Why are you a slub? Why are you like this? Why you like that? Then sulking, oh, you never do this for me. You never do that for me. and then you're like, I'm holding a grudge against you. I'm so angry.

Try and not do those things. Try and come from a place where if somebody does not deserve your energy, they're just not deserving of it. They're just not a part of your life, you know? They just, you pull away from them. You pull away from them being in your life by virtue of them not doing the things. By all means, communicate. Communicate to people.

Look, I don't like when you did that, Frank. I don't like it when you do that. That upsets me. I don't enjoy it. but don't berate whole grudges sulk. It won't make you more appealing. Well, actually, it will make you more appealing and everyone will chase you. That's the truth.

But it's not through the purpose of becoming more appealing to random men. The purpose of this here situation is for it to shift your energy. And that feminine energy means that you don't try and control people. You let people be who they want to be and you be who you want to be. You will develop queen-like energy. I want you to envision a character. a movie? Who is always grumbling and criticizing, oh, John, I don't like it when you do that? Who is that character? Is that character the queen? Is that character Calisi? Is that character any of the queens

you see on dramas? Because dramas, they represent life, right? People try and denote those kind of characters and dramas represent life. Queens aren't surly, sulky, grudge holding and all of the above. Queens are reserved almost. You've got to cultivate that princess queen. energy. They're either playful like a princess or they are careful with their energy and who they give it to. Do you know who you're acting like when you're acting all like naggy criticizing and grudge holding? And forget how the guy sees you in this situation. I'm just meaning it in a real, real way. You're acting like the cook, the cook in the kitchen. You know that that haggard woman in the medieval drama who's a old John, I never, blah, blah, blah, you know, that

Victorian drama. That's how you're acting. And if that's the energy you want to present into this world, if that's what you think your, you know, reality, your energy, your authenticity is, then you be the haggard woman, yeah. A high value man wants a high value woman. So when you are acting all sulky, critiquy, grudgy, annoyed at John because he's not doing what you want to do, maybe you and John actually match. Maybe you are him lying on the couch with his beer belly, never doing anything and you going around grumbling. Because that's kind of like a match made in heaven, you know, It's always like Homer Simpson, you know, that kind of guy and the woman who's nagging him. Why not imagine that kind of guy who's never getting it right, never doing the right thing, never asking you out, never do it with a queen, with a freaking swan like queen.

It would never happen. Those two just wouldn't happen. And I think that's a lot of times what we are scared of. We are scared to be in our true feminine, our true essence of being her, our true God-given energy and who we are because we are scared. that the low value, they're giving us low value. No human beings low value, but they're giving us low value. Men won't be able to be with us. And we're scared that we can't be the metaphoric pooper-scooper of the cat poo that is these men. And if you become that high-status woman, you will naturally repel the men that you don't want to be with. And you will have to up-level.

You will have to up-level. I remember doing a practice in one of my courses with a personal client where she had to write down the type of man that she wants. And I made her do this exercise where she wrote down the type of man that she wants to be with. And when I came to turning around the process and I said, now write down the type of woman he would want to be with in return. It matched not at all to who she was representing. So this exercise of not criticizing sulking and grudge holding is an exercise in the self-bederment. Number two, your essence of self is the only thing that matters.

It's almost like character building and character exploration, okay? it's almost like self-concept is the thing that matters. It's how you react to a situation, not the situation that matters. Anything can be seen in this like way where you are building as the character that you are because you attract how you feel. Whenever I've been put out of how I naturally want to feel in my life, I remember that it's about the character development and the journey. If you are that woman who you want to become this queen, high value woman, you have to understand that it's a self-concept that matters. What would you do in this given situation and how are you going to self-develop and grow? Write down how you want to feel, how you want to act,

how you want to appear, how you want to behave in this world, the avatar of the woman you want to be. This needs to be your power script. Like, you just look at this script and you know that that is go time. You envision your reality and you match it to that self. Like you are that character. You know when the movie starts and the main characters on the screen, you are that character, write that reality in your book. This is my book. Here it is. It's that ocean color.

You know, I pick the color. I envision my reality. I match my external to that reality. You need to create a script, a character that you identify with and that you go through life with. No matter what the circumstance. Number three, everything will be all right in the end. If it's not all right, then it's not the end. You need to see yourself and your life.

Stop folding book and disrespect. expecting everybody. You need to see your life as an unfolding journey. If you are in dire straits, if you are in a predicament, in a cuffle that you did not envision, you need to envision yourself like said main character who's going to make it out of it. Learn to see your life as an unfolding journey, not the end all and be all. He cheated, cool. I haven't cheated on. He's done this. Cool. That's happened to me. You know what I mean? I am not my immigrant story. I am not the guy who cheated on me. I am not my anxious attachment. I am who I am. now, and the film would be boring, frankly, if I was just born in whatever and just cruise through

life. That's a boring movie. That is not a movie you want to watch. Like a film that is unfolding, your main character story arc is so important and how you see yourself. Number four, Quatro, you have value by the virtue of being female. Stop chase, my God, please, stop chasing men, please. You see the dusty, crusty, gray brown bird of every species, judging judgmentally, and shaking her head at the amazing peacock of the man that is performing in front of her. Why? I'll tell you why right now and you will understand me, okay? You are going against the law of nature by trying to chase men and entertain them. I will tell you why right now.

You take energy and time to create an egg every month and you have to choose a suitor. One egg every month that your whole body energy goes into to create this egg, okay? By virtue of you being female, you have that value. men have millions of sperm that they can just spread and spread and spread and spread. Okay, so you have to choose with your mind. You have to choose with your heart. You have to really put power and intentions behind everything you do because of that virtue. No matter.

I hate it when women are like, oh, but I'm not anything special or I'm not so special. I'm sorry, if the Grey Pigeon is special, you are special by the virtue of being female. Okay? My daughter is calling me. We're going to have to say adieu. no matter if you're a gray pigeon and look level up be a beautiful pink flamingo but even if you are a gray pigeon you are special by the virtue of having that egg that you have to create a life for and that you have to carry for perhaps nine months and maybe you're not getting pregnant but that's beside

the point it's just the biology and nature become her over and out good afternoon good morning and good night i am here in the car and today is going to be a little bit of a whispering podcast because my son is asleep in the back. Today he had an Easter show and he's fallen asleep. And the reason I'm risking him waking up is not because I'm a deviant person, but it is because, and an evil person, but it's because, as you know, if you're a mum, if they sleep all day, they won't sleep all night and he'd not sleep all night. Anyway, we move. Today is 20 practical things to create respect, desire, prioritization from that man in your life and all those good things. Okay, so 20 feminine habits that make him value you deeply.

Okay, so let us begin. And this is going to be a quick fire one. So buckle in, buckle in. Number one, remain calm when he pushes for an emotional reaction. What you don't understand is a lot of femininity is to do with emotionality, flow, and feminine energy. A lot of men do things, whether those things be bad or good or whatever, is to get an emotional reaction.

That's why I say have an amazingly emotional reaction when he does amazing things, and a very non-reaction when he does things that you don't like. Why? Because you're going to get more of the things that cause an emotional reaction. You want jewelry or react emotionally when he gives you some. You don't want him to always go out and, you know, prioritize the boys. Don't react emotionally because sometimes men feel important to you and what ladies, when what? When they feel that you reacted emotionally. That is what matters. Men often subconsciously test boundaries and push buttons to gouge an emotional reaction from you. how they feel important to you. Calmness and self, value and emotional independence is rooted in what makes you valuable to him because he knows you are valuable to yourself. Okay. Number two,

say no to last minute plans. This is another practical thing. All last minute plans say no husband, no husband, boyfriend, whatever. Why it works? Scarcity increases value in you, in a handbag, in a car. Anytime people want to make something valuable, they have to have scarcity. If there's Lots of it on the shelf. People don't want it. Whether it be an apple, whatever it might be, scarcity increases value. This teaches him that you have a full life and he needs to slot into your life when he can. Waiting around for you and when you are good already creates a scarcity effect. If you're always there and ready to go, my love, no matter how much he loves you, you are going to become boring. Number three, respond and don't react. By the way, I'm looking down here because I've got them all noted on my phone. I didn't come unprepared.

But number three, respond, don't react. This, you need to get it through a beautiful brain. Responding and reacting. Reacting is just willy-nilly. It's all over the place. You're just reactive, you're reactionary. Whilst responding is thought through and careful, okay? Emotional regulation is sexy.

Feminine energy can be warm without being chaotic. This helps a man trust you in deeper intimacy. When you are not chaotic and always reactionary to everything, does. This is when a man properly bonds to you. It's backed by science that he can bond with that suppressin when he can see that you are, and I hate this, teammate, a teammate. Like, you are not just going to lose your shit at him at every turn. Okay? So you respond, as in like, you don't turn a blind eye to what he does, but you don't react and fly and throughout the baby with the bathwater. Number four, this is golden. Golden. Mirror his effort, not his words.

People can say anything, okay? And because you're listening with your female ears, you're not understanding that that doesn't mean anything in the world of man, okay? Match his effort helps create a connection and avoids anxious overfunctioning on your half. You as a woman, us all as women, we over function with anxiety. We do a lot for him because he said he loves us. We do a lot for him because he said he's the one or whatever. No, no, no, no.

Match what he does with your actions. He's there for you, you're there for him. He prioritizes you, you prioritize him, not what he says. Number five, keep your life full and nourishing without him. Autonomy increases attraction from him when he can see you as another entity that is incredible in itself and its entirety. He is more likely to want to be a part of that. Self-expansion theory shows people are attracted to those who have their own growth and stimulation of their own desires and life. You cannot be wanting to enter the world of someone who has a known life. You know that from your own self. Six, don't sleep with him until there's emotional

safety. Men will try their best until they get what they want. They will only meet the standard of what it is that is required until they get what they want and that is the standard that they'll stay in. What do most men want? Yes, ladies, to sleep with you. And I don't mean that in a bad way. That is just the objective. Okay, let's be realistic. You're attractive. He wants to sleep with you. Then he builds emotional bonds with you, perhaps. So he will do whatever is required for him to get to that goal. and once he gets there, that is the plateau that he will meet. Why would he go above and beyond that if he's already met his intention? Okay.

Delaying gratification increases value and men bond through investment. So make him work for it. The more you invests, the better it is for you. I know it sounds harsh, but it's better. Invest time, effort, energy, whatever it is you want. Seven, praise him when he shows up as a man. Positive reinforcement is more powerful than criticism. What was that?

Positive reinforcement. Kara is more powerful than the stick. Men crave respect. and appreciation. Men crave respect and appreciation. The more you can give that to him, he cannot get that in the outside world. It's very rare and far between in the outside world right now, okay? If you can give that to him, you can be the master of his heart. How cheesy is that? Number eight, keep a little mystery, why it works. Dopamine loves anticipation. If he knows everything at once, there's no intrigue left. Feminine energy is alluring and not oversharing. Stop talking about

your toilet habits. Stop talking about what happened to you and why it happened and how you. feel and when you were looking at the moon, you thought it was a bit angular, but also it was kind of hanging at an angle and it was kind of like under the cloud and you thought about your mom when you, stop it. Have a little mystery. Things you don't say are way more intriguing. Number nine, don't chase, let him come to you, why it works. Polarity is a principle. You cannot be going towards him and him be going towards you. You would crash. There needs to be a minus pull and a forward pull. The masculine wants to be the plus, the pursuer, the sun, the chaser and the feminine wants to be the chaste. How do you do that? You need to back up. Keep it backing up, okay? Number 10,

detach from outcomes and focus on how you feel around him. Stop thinking about, is he going to be my husband? Is he going to be this one? Is he going to be that one? And plotting and planning and plotting and planning because that's what we do as women. Instead, keep yourself grounded in the now. Does he make you feel happy in the moment? If yes, pursue that. If not, move on. And men are very, very good at seeing if a woman is like plotting all these things about him. And they honestly kind of detach her women like that because they see it's not actually about him. 11. Hold boundaries with kindness. Clear boundaries signal self-respect. Research shows people admire and trust those who enforce their values calmly. If you are screaming at people, if you're going ballistic, if you have to hit him with a

baseball bat over the head with your boundaries, those are not boundaries. Those are forced and not something that can be sustainable. The calmer, the kinder you are, the more appealing you will be. 12. If he goes cold, don't try to re-ignite the flame. Go colder. He turns down the temperature, you turn it lower. Okay, he turns up the temperature. You meet him where the temperature is. It disrupts the dynamic if you keep trying to turn up the heat when heat keeps turning it down. Chasing after emotional unavailability reinforces that unavailability. What, Margarita? chasing after he's emotionally unavailable reinforces and says, yes, well done, do that again, to emotional unavailability. Pulling back mirrors his behavior and forces him to reassess. He pulls

back, you pull back. What does he get for pulling back? You pulling back. No rewards here, sir. No, not today. 13. Don't over-explain yourself excessively. Over-explaining stems from anxiety and desire to be understood. A confident woman doesn't need to be gotten by everyone. She doesn't need to be loved by everyone. She doesn't need to be liked by everyone. She doesn't need to be everyone's best friend. That is not what she needs. No sir, no, ma'am. Don't over-explain excessively. That adds to your mystery. 14. Value yourself first. Even in micro moments, this was hard for me to do, baby. This was hard for me to do because I don't like to do it. It makes me feel uncomfortable. Micro self-abandonments add up. Showing a man, you value yourself. Even the tone and posture sets a precedent of how you're going

act always going to the meal he wants always doing the thing he wants to do always staying up an hour later always putting in burst in micro micro moments adds up you were going to get your nails done he said he can meet you now you met him micro moment he can see it he can smell it it's not good for you or for him 15 speak in desires not in demands saying i love when you triggers for him to do it again feminine requests appeals to his protector and provider instinct as opposed to a demand you never, no, no, no, no, no, like a mum. Don't be his mum. 16. Say, I'll think about it when I'm sure, not yes to be liked.

I think about it. I know someone who always says this, and it used to drive me insane, because it's such a high value status thing to say, and I'm like, excuse me, who do you think you are? But when someone offers something, don't always jump to a yes, say, yeah, I think about it. I'll consider it. That means you consider your time is really, really valuable. and you might see if you can slot them in. 17.

Be warm and not eager. Warm is feminine. Eagerness is a little anxious attachment. Soutile over-enthusiasm. A subtle warmth is way better than, oh my God, I'm so excited. You're not a doggy. You're not a doggy. You're a catty.

You're a soft, amazing catty. Feline energy, okay? 18. Give him space for him to miss you. If you're always in his George Foreman, he cannot miss you. Absence increases. emotional presence. What? Absence increases for men. Emotional presence opposite than it is for us. Men process emotions slower and often feel the impact after you pull back. In that moment,

when you're having that conversation with him, he's not feeling emotion. He'll feel emotion after you exit your fine self out of there. 19. Staying in feminine even when triggered. Feminine isn't weakness. It's power under control. Maintaining grace, even when and stress arise. Yes, you can cry. Yes, you can do whatever you want, express your emotion. But again, you are not reactive. Okay? 20. Walk away if you're being, if you're not being treated, walk away, walk away. If he's being abusive, walk away. If you don't like it, walk away, walk away. Nothing signals value more than removing yourself, aka you, the prize, from the situation, if you do not like it. Those are 20 golden rules of practical principle, practical principle.

apples, mouthful, of how you're going to be in your feminine energy and be the most high-value thing to yourself, most importantly, because I see when you say, well, we talk about men, don't we want to decenter them? This is exactly what this is for. We're decentering those men. I'm going to get my son. I'm going to take him upstairs. I'm going to give him dinner. I'll see you on the next one. Love you, lots like Jett's. Bye. Hello, my wonderful, gorgeous, sexy human being. Welcome back to the Being Her podcast. I hope you've been well. I have been well. I'm sitting in a different. position. As you can see, we have flowers behind us. We are enhancing our feminine energy in small,

tiny ways. And I want to bring your on the podcast today to talk about how you can do that too, because it's about small incremental changes that you can make happen throughout the day that are going to amplify and boost that feminine energy that you have. I have them written on my glorious little sparkly black phone here, and we're going to go through them. There are 13. of them. There are 13 steps. I like that number. 13. It's a little bit mysterious how you should be if you want to be a black, cat, feminine energy woman. Number one, morning rituals. One or two things you start your morning with. I am not one for these big, elaborate morning routines because I have, and I'm a month old and a four-year-old and a busy life and a podcast and a business and a husband and a under and under, okay. And I can't do ice baths. I am not like one of those.

podcast bros and the gym bros that have time to do the ice baths and the nasal folds and the whatever else they do because I'm living in the life, you know, I'm a woman, we're in flow, we have periods, we have no periods, we have this, we have that, we have filicular phases, you know. But if you can anchor something in your morning routine and in your ritual, that will help you understand that you are your own priority, that might be, for me, for example, that is water with electrolytes or that might be something like looking out at the sunrise because my daughter wakes up at the crack of dawn. It might be morning rituals that make you understand that you are living your life in your experience as the beautiful feminine energy woman that you are. It might be

journaling. Journaling is a big one for me. I do my journaling at night. So it's not a morning routine for me, but if you don't have children and a household to get ready, I highly highly, encourage journaling or meditation because journaling for me is the thing that changed my life. It pivoted my life 360 completely. I used to be a bit of a walking mess. Like everything was all over the place and I structured what I wanted to get done and who I am through gratitude journaling. But I'll talk more about journaling and other podcasts. Okay. It's prioritizing self-care routines and it sets the tone for the day that yes, I am my priority. I bought these beautiful mugs the other day that are stunning, I enjoy using them that anchors you in your feminine energy of self-prioritization.

Number two, daily affirmations. It is important to speak light into yourself and repeat it every day. You are literally what you communicate to the world. You, how you believe yourself to be, how hot you believe yourself to be, how interesting you believe yourself to be. Not delulu, not delusional, but literally what you communicate into the world is what you get back from the world. you need to communicate to yourself through affirmations that you are the main character. I am the main character. You are the main character. Affirmations, daily affirmations and setting your intention for the day amplifies your feminine energy as opposed to walking through the day willy-nilly and hoping that shit sticks. You need to set affirmations of the type of woman you want to be because when Frank comes texting and you know that he's ghosted you a hundred times before,

your affirmations is I am my own priority, I have black hair energy, nobody can derail me out of my feelings and Frank texts you. You set that affirmation. You're Angelina Jolie. You are not Becky who's going to be texting him back, so you are not going to be replying to him because your intentions are set and therefore your day flows in a more feminine energy way. Three, dress in a way that makes you feel confident. It does not mean heels, it does not mean a dress, It does not mean all the ways in which you think you have to appear in this world as a woman, as a feminine woman. It is not 1950s cliche. You don't have to wear an apron that collects eggs.

Okay? If you know the reference, let me know. But what makes you feel powerful? Is it a power suit? Is it a really clean, aesthetic set of active wear? For me right now, I feel the most clean, crispy and sexy in a really clean set of new. active wear. I am not active in terms of the fact that I'm not going to the gym, but I'm running around after toddlers or slash a really powerful suit. That's why I mentioned the two. I don't really

want to wear a body con right now. Not because I'm like, oh no, my body. No, it just feels a little bit too youthful for me almost. I'm like in a different trajectory. What makes you feel confident and powerful? It might be a bathrobe with a bun. It doesn't matter. Whatever makes you feel super cozy, comfy, whatever it is, sexy, whatever look you're going for that empowers you, have that idea in your head and wear that. If you don't know what to wear and you don't know how to present yourself, go to Pinterest, type some things in that inspire you that you really like the look of. And Pinterest is an amazing machine. It will suggest other things that you should wear. It will suggest other things that you should look at, like Parisian style,

Mine is apparently Parisian style. I typed in blazer and cute dress or something. Apparently, I've got Parisian style. Four. Practice receiving. The essence of feminine energy is receiving. Compliments, ideas, the world, flow. If you're in masculine energy, you're the one working overtime to make things happen for people.

I want you to be in a receiving energy. That means not pushing people who are not willing to do the right thing. by you into doing the right thing by you. That means when somebody gives you a compliment saying thank you. That means when somebody doesn't want to spend time with you, receive that. Receive that humbly. Say yes, okay, they don't want to spend time with me. They don't want to spend time with me. When a friend is rude to you, receive that too. Understand it. Log it in your mind. When he doesn't prioritize and doesn't make time for you, receive that. You've received that. You've acknowledged that. Therefore, you don't want to see them anymore. You see how it works. Receiving energy is a really incredible

practice to help take into yourself awareness. You're aware of the world. You're not pushing the world into something that it doesn't want to be. You're not trying to shape the world into something that it is not. Set boundaries is number five. Set boundaries with grace in a firm way. You don't have to berate people with your boundaries. You don't have to beat people over the head with your boundaries. You just have to have them. You need to know your values and your boundaries. If you want to know more about it, go on my website, look at harness your feminine energy or polarity principles if you're in a relationship and that will teach you everything you need to know about how to do that. If you're listening, it's also in the description of the podcast.

It's really, really important to set boundaries. The essence of feminine energy isn't pushing and striving to achieve something, but it is saying no to things. So if something is not for you, you have to say no, that is not for me. Jog on. Thank you very much, Richard. I don't want that. And not feel bad about it, not feel apologetic about that, not feel guilt about that. We have succumb to guilt as a species of women because we've been told we're wrong again and again and again and we are not wrong. It's okay to say no. It's okay to have values and boundaries. No more cease. Slow down and be present. Feminine energy thrives when you are unhurried and practicing mindful daily practice of living. You need to not be rushing through life, but to be taking life in like

the lioness that you are, like the black cat that you are. You can only see who someone truly is when you're watching them. When you go on a first date, don't be didda, did, did, do, de, doda, Crassie the clown, entertaining him. No, you're watching him. You're seeing who he is. You have a pause to you like you have an element of mystery to you. Let him come to you. Learn about him. Because if you don't know about him, then you don't know who the person is that you are seeing, who the person is that you are interviewing. You don't know. Seven, create a space you love. A nurturing, beautiful environment allows feminine energy to flow, hence the environment for this video today, okay? Flowers, candles, things like that. This is the hardest thing for me. I am cluttered mess. I don't know how

I was born as a Virgo. I don't know what happened. Okay, I think the rest of my astrology chart is in Leo, but everything is a cluster fluff, okay? But apparently, a Virgo can create the space. I love to create beautiful moments. That's the thing for me. I love to find myself in beautiful moments in a restaurant, having a coffee, taking that moment in, you have to create a space you love. If you can't create it in your home because you live with other people or children or, you know, with your parents, create it in your bedroom. Don't believe that you can just fluster fluff through life, okay? Eight, move your body in a way that feels good. Do not think that lifting weights is not a feminine energy pursuit. It could be if it makes you feel powerful and aligned. Do you know what throws me off

my feminine energy? Rapid movement and ridiculous, like weird things that like jerk my head around. Like, I don't know. Some kind of exercises that are like, yes, girls, jump around. Do you know those exercise classes? Like I don't even know, like really excessively energetic classes. It make me feel like a buffoon, like a fool. I cannot handle it. Okay. Yoga and Pilates and weightlifting. Something focused and, you know, intentional makes me feel like a freaking goddess. What is it for you? Move your body, dancing for some people. It will boost your self-worth and it will align you with your body connection. Nine. Embrace your emotions. We suppress our emotions all the time. I used to suppress my emotions all the time and I preach on and on about like don't write him siliquis on his phone

how he's hurt you and why he shouldn't hurt you again. That is a waste of time to somebody who's not willing to hear you. If you wanted to hear you, he'd come to your face and say, honey, what's wrong? And you could talk, okay? If he's not reading your messages, trust me, he's just skimming it. He doesn't want to know, yeah? That is self-respect to not waste your time. But don't act like everything's okay when it's not okay. Let people know.

Actually, you've hurt my feelings. I don't want to hang out with you today. Richard, okay? You've hurt my feelings. Oh, when's that going to pass, Rebecca? I don't know, Richard. It's up to you to decide when that's going to pass because you hurt my feelings. I don't hurt my own feelings, okay?

Your feelings are letting you know. They're a protective mechanism. Us as women, we are the species that is less strong than the man, okay? We have our emotions and our sixth sense. To do-d-d-d-d-rador. Is he dangerous? Is he safe? All those things, okay?

10. Say thank you to your prior self every night before you go to bed, okay? Before bed, reflect on something you did that made yourself proud in your life all that day and say to yourself, thank you for getting yourself to where you are today. Your inner child needs to hear it and it will cultivate your feminine energy. You need to hear. in yourself that you have your own back. That is what builds confidence. Say thank you and build a gratitude journal and practice. Write down every night three things that you are grateful for in your life.

11. Surround yourself with positive influences. Delete all the girls who are 16 years old, who have perfect bodies and you are here at 34 looking at them after three kids wondering why you don't look like that. It's not helpful. Follow a 36 year old mom who's also got three kids and an amazing body. Now that's resourceful and helpful. Okay. Follow positive influences. Don't follow people who make you feel sad and bad. And in real life, cut those people out as well. There is no room in life. Life is so short for people who are going to drain you. 12. Practice soft power. Feminine energy isn't about being loud or aggressive. It's about owning your power in a soft, powerful way. We feel really shitty being in the silence of our own power. If you do,

you know you need to work on it. When you say no to somebody, when you set a bounce. and you feel like you need to explain it and never complain, never explain is my favorite slogan. If you said it once, you don't need to over-explain yourself and apologize. I struggle with it too. I get it. I have anxious attachment, which I've healed. But it's always something in the back of your mind that will trigger and be like, oh, everyone's going to leave me quick. It's a disaster.

Quick explain why you're worth love. Don't. Okay. Soft power. You've said it calmly. That's it. You don't need to yell at people. You don't need to follow them around berating them.

It is what it is. 13. Most important, invest in yourself. Books, classes, skincare. Every single thing you do that invests in yourself builds your feminine energy. Because if you are giving it to your husband, your children and everything else, you are missing the big picture. You are there to radiate your feminine energy to them and inspire them and the world by your utter sheer magnificence. because when you replenish yourself, you've got enough to give to them.

I'm telling this to myself as much as I am to you. I have small children and not the village that I would wish on you, for example, right? So for me, sometimes I have to create that village and I have to replenish myself that instead of working all the time and being the workhorse that I talk about in my courses that I encourage you to look at if you're interested in this. If you're the workhorse or the cow, which is the woman who gives a lot to her children or the workhorse who works and thinks by doing enough, she will, you know, be valued, you won't. You need to be the deer, the wild one, the one who is hard to catch because she is in the moment,

in her element, doing her own thing. Okay? I encourage you to do that. Those are the 13 small principles and daily changes you can have to manifest more feminine energy. Check out my book, The New Rules. You'll love it. And I'll speak to you on the next one.

Sick but thriving is an understatement. It's a really interesting video to come to you and tell you about goddess energy, which I have here in my trusted book, because I am not feeling goddessy vibes at all in terms of the fact that, you know, oh, look at this goddess energy. In terms of the fact that I never get sick, I never get sick. It just doesn't happen. It's a violation.

It cannot occur. But the reason I am, thus Leah inclined today, first of all problems, but I had somebody help me clean the house between my businesses and my life. and they use bleach. And I'm here to tell you that when you use toxic chemicals in your house, it kind of lowers your immunity, okay? So I usually don't get sick because my body can,

obviously it's a viral infection and my kids are young, so they pick everything up. Thank you, babies. But yeah, if you want to not get sick as often, eliminate toxic chemicals from your house, thank me later. Okay, let's focus on goddess energy. I think the most interesting thing about this topic, goddess energy and the whole idea of it is being this gorgeous woman, this gorgeous goddess who

just emulates just gorgeousness because we all know that the woman who possesses the most intrigue and the most glamour and the most fascination isn't always the most aesthetically good looking woman. So this video is for those of you who watch my content and they say to me, okay, that's all fair enough. But I wasn't born. a 10 out of 10. Are men still going to be inclined towards me in that way? And the answer is yes, if you possess that kind of goddess energy. Goddess energy is focusing on how you feel. How you feel, it's almost like the essence of sensuality. Not sexuality, sensuality. The senses, the goddess, she wafts through life, wafts like an aromatic smell through life and embraces the best that

life has to offer and people want to be around her by the sheer want to emulate her energy, okay? It is how you feel. You know those days when you wake up and you just walk out on your balcony. I don't know if you have a balcony, but I'm looking at mine, okay? And you're just like, I might be sick like I am right now. I might not be doing my best, but today I will do my best. Like today I'm on the trend. Today I am goddess vibes, okay?

there are women, like I said, who are gorgeous, gorgeous. Gorgeous is such an interesting word because they're just gorgeous. They're just scrumptious without being necessarily the best looking aesthetically. You need to understand that the biggest reason people are attracted to you and attraction in general and that goddess energy is about the value you have for yourself as opposed to anything else. A thing about goddess in a temple and she's in a temple and people come to worship her. Goddesses are different, okay? There are goddesses who are like an Egyptian goddess.

There is like the Nordic goddess. There is different types and each of them hold value. But the thing about them is that they're fully in their presence and in their spirit and what they're representing. Okay. It's about having value to yourself. You'll be amazed, okay? Humanity and just attraction in general is not about sales. Okay, that sounds weird.

It's not about sales, but it's about selling yourself. It's about playing a character. You should constantly be playing a character until it becomes real. Maybe that's controversial. Maybe that is the opposite to authenticity that we're all taught to have. But if you are stuck and not feeling your best, this will get you unstuck. The next biggest thing is no neurotic energy and relaxed energy only. I know this is really hard to emulate, but I saw a quote or a reel.

I can't remember where it says, I've seen successful women. I've seen energetic women. I have seen athletic women. I have seen stressed women. I have seen all kinds of women. I have seen maternal women, but I've never seen a relaxed woman. In our day and age, we've fallen into this trajectory of no relaxation. No chill.

A woman who's relaxed in her body. A woman who's relaxed in her moment. I often catch myself with this. My mind is so active that I'm like, even in my marriage, I'm like, what are we doing? What are we going? What do, do, do, do, do it. I'm all. always trying to play Tetris with my day, okay? Because I've got so much to do because I did this to

myself, okay? But a relaxed woman is goddess energy. If you can emulate relaxation and just presence in your body, that is what we're aiming for. That is goddess energy, okay? Just being relaxed in your presence. Like, no matter what's happening, no matter how you're looking, like, you are more of a goddess. If you're relaxed in your bathrobe with your hair in a bun, then if you're a neurotic woman who's got her eyelashes, hair done and everything else. You know what I mean? The neurotic energy is the most off-putting energy. Find ways in your life to streamline yourself so that you are relaxed.

Next, tell yourself you're gorgeous when you have people prove it to you. Remember those moments. It's really easy to fall into the trap of being like, I don't believe that I'm anything special, that I don't believe that I'm anything valuable. But there are moments in your life where people have shown you that you are, whether it's that man who's complimented you randomly in a coffee shop, whether it's your mother who's told you you've got wonderful little feet. I don't know why that's a wonderful thing,

but there are anchors and points of times where somebody has made you feel gorgeous. I want you to remember all those times and document them and journal them. We're very good at remembering times when someone made us feel less than. Even in social media commentary, like comments on social media, there might be a hundred amazing comments and then one that is negative and that is the one that you will remember. It's just human nature because we're scared to be ill-spoken of in the village, the village being our community. And now the community is so big.

But back in the day, we had 50, 150, maybe 250 people in our village. And if Samuel over there had something bad to say about you, it means that it could spread around everyone. And it really is a big deal, you know, because then you could be ill-spoken of in the village and thrown out and cast away on an iceberg into the ocean. That doesn't happen now because our brain is not accustomed to the amount of people that we're exposed. too, girl, okay? We don't know that there's like, for me, there's thousands and thousands of people. One of them said something ill about me, and it's not like Samuel in the village. It actually won't do anything to me, but we focus on it. To break that pattern, you need to write down every time someone said something positive about you, something to reference about the fact that you are

actually a gorgeous, juicy creature and you need to look at yourself in the mirror in the morning and be like, you juicy, divine, gorgeous creature. Like, I used to not love my features, they're very Eastern European or Nordic or Scandinavian, whatever. Like I'm born somewhere between Russia and Finland, right? And I used to just find them like either like round or a bit angular or a bit like, like I didn't like them when I was younger. So I started to get fascinated about the culture and my genetic features and the people who came before me and what that means and how I can best cultivate that.

And now I look at myself in the mirror. Not every day. I don't have time for that. I've got young babies. But when I do have time, I'm like, look at you. with your authentic, amazing features that aren't like everybody else. When I walk around Australia with the Western people, I might look Western to you, but I'd look different to them, you know what I mean?

And I'm like, look at me with my massive head. I know that sounds really weird, but you know what I mean? My features are a little bit different, and I've grown to love them because I am that way, and there is nobody like me here. Okay? Next, if you're 40 plus, I found this very useful. If you're a 40 plus goddess, I will tell you this.

I'm in my 30s, yeah? when you are young, beauty is given to you by nature, okay? Boy, girl, doesn't matter. You know, you see that teenager who treats themselves like crap, and it just doesn't reflect on their looks, yeah? Some of us aren't that so lucky. Like when I was a teenager, it did reflect on my looks, but mostly youth can carry the damage that you do to yourself.

40 plus, a woman's beauty and gorgeousness is not indicated by her natural features, but more so by how she chose to treat herself, aka it is indicative of her wisdom, okay? Because if you chose to treat yourself well and you chose to treat yourself in this wise way of how you carry yourself and how you treat your body, it's going to emulate on your skin if you protected it from the sun, if you ate the right foods, if you did this down the other,

and of course some of us has better features than the other and vice versa, but there is a purchaser to every single cup of tea. I know that sounds really weird, but essentially, someone who likes me is not going to like someone else. You know what I mean? And vice versa. Lastly, if you want to embrace yourself, these are all thoughts, okay? Next, we're going to go on to real practical things and my journey. Lastly, if you're feeling shit about yourself, remember, you will never be as young and full of life as you are now. Maybe you've really, really had a hard time with your health, and maybe you will feel better and do better in the future.

But the reality is you are only as young as you will be now, okay? If you're looking in the mirror and you're like, oh my God, I'm feeling old. Or, you know, I might not have another chance. Or, you know, I've got two kids and I'm divorced or whatever it is, right? Understand that this is the youngest and sexiest you will be that if you are 80 years old, you would give anything to have to be 35 again, to be 45 again, to be 55 again. To an 80 year old, 55 is, 55 is damn young, okay? Okay?

Okay, Amanda, it's very young. Next. these are one two three four five six six things six to seven depends on how you know much i want to talk seven principles of goddess energy number one sleep okay it's more about sleep environment i'm not going to say sleep is important because when you sleep it's really important i'm going to i'm going to put a twist on it what's your sleep environment like i bought these blinds and they are this like beautiful the color's called donkey i don't know why it's called donkey i was like guys you need to change up your life, but they're like a sparkly, of grey kind of camilley colour,

and they are gorgeous, okay? Pictures behind me, I'm going to get a board behind me. The reason it all looks discombobulated is because we bought another house and we were moving. Now we're going to stay here for a while and rebuild. I don't know what's happening, okay? Don't ask me. It's not my field. I choose not to partake in it.

Let my husband take care of that. I don't care. But the sleep environment you have is very, very important. I had a friend of mine who was the most glamorous glamorous, glamour. you will ever meet. But when I went in her bedroom, she has the bed sheets of when she had, when she was like 20 years old and she was just at uni, okay?

And I was like, how can you have goddess vibes or have, like, replenish yourself energetically in that environment? Your bedroom, your boudoir needs to have a feel to it of a replenishment, of relaxation, of, you know, juiciness, of yumminess. The sheets need to be crispy. The sleep hygiene needs to be on,

cold room, warm sheets, okay, face mask. We can't be joking around with this if we are going to try and emulate goddess energy because that is where you sleep. If you want more on this, join my eight week, become her course. We're starting 22nd of July. If you miss it, I'm sorry. If you haven't, get on it like a carb on it because we are going through eight steps of like becoming her and really delving into it, okay?

It's serious time. It works out of about $45 a week. So it's good. remove your crusty student life from your bedroom and start to respect yourself as a goddess like build your temple number two food i have been struggling with this so much recently and i don't mean it as in like i'm struggling i don't know what to do like i know what to do what suits me and is my ethnic profile for you it would be different like my husband is different my husband is chinese and australian i am really nordic so far as is different my ancestors lived off uh seal fat they didn't actually, but let's just imagine, right?

As opposed to for him, he does really well with carbs and fruit and things like that were different. And meat, he says meat as well, but whatever. When I eat a high carb diet, my body just does, it's not as juicy and bouncy like a firm ball. Okay? We're all different, though. You need to look at your genetics. You need to look at your blood type. You need to look at everything.

You need to take your food seriously because how can you be a goddess unless you know what fuels you, For me, it's low sugar, high protein, almost keto. I get this, like, boost of energy. You know why this has happened? I eat too much bread. There was toxic chemicals in my en suite, which is like opens straight out to my bathroom, and my daughter sleeps in the same room.

Oh my God, I lost my living mind when I found out that they used bleach everywhere. It smelled like a swimming pool, okay? So anyway, we move. Sorry, sorry. Very fortunate to have people help me, but I also work my ass off to make it happen. See him. Anyway, you know, funny fact.

If you've read my book, you'll know this. My mom was a struggling parent, single parent of me. Immigrant moved to a new country, but she still had someone to help her clean because she worked three jobs and she had no time to do that. So I think that's like just something in my family. I always have, like to have somebody help me because I am so bad at it. Choose your routine, choose your food, drink water, do the right thing and really delve into it. It's not games. It's not fun and games, guys.

be serious, okay? I'm boiling eggs upstairs. I'm going to eat those eggs because protein, okay? Muscle mass. After a certain age, you choose if you're going to be fat, not as in if you're going to be fat, not that you're a fat person. If your body constitution is going to be made up of fat or muscle. Because when you're a teenager, it just somehow is the best equilibrium of both.

When you pass 40, it chooses fat or. muscle. So if you want to look sculpted, if you want to have a waistline, if you want to have all those things, I highly recommend Pilates, yoga for the body balance yoga. Chef's kiss. I cannot wait to get back to yoga. Please, someone release me. Release me. I want to get to yoga. And next, weightlifting. Lift those weights because then you won't have a posture like me. Look at me. Look at me. Look at me sitting like a prawn. I look like a prawn. Poster is number six. on the list and we'll go back but do you see that look at this how i'm sitting hello guys yeah this how you be a goddess listen shoulders back okay there should be a line a string coming up from the

top of your head that's how you have good posture not by putting it back and all like arching back like an idiot no you you you take it and it almost like lifts you up and out of your pelvis i just felt a stretch in my pelvis okay i complain ever since having my daughter that my pelvic bones hurt okay that's because I scrunch down like a prawn. You see? It's important to have muscular kind of possession of your body and you have powerful movement and you are cat-like and you are a panther, okay? Black cat energy versus Labrador energy.

How are you going to be a black cat if you're scrunched up like a prawn? Okay. Next. Skin. Face massage. Okay. Botox if you want it, but that's up to you. but most importantly, face massage, put some ice on your skin, okay?

Mom used to do that all the time. She used to put ice on her skin, it tightens your skin, okay? If you don't have money, every single fruit that has, like, active enzymes, papaya mango on your face, okay, that takes away the dead skin cells. Thank me later. Take time on your face. Decide on what makeup you want to wear. Look at your again. What do you look like?

Are you a J-Lo? Are you, like me? Like, what is the look? The next point, by the way, is hair. I used to have hair extensions all the time. One point I woke up and I said, you know what? And I actually tried to manifest it. And I think I did.

I said, I have long luscious hair because I looked at all the Russian girls who have all this long luscious hair. And I was like, how? I could not grow it past here. Okay. I stopped washing it every day. I washed it once a week. People tell me, oh, that's not. It doesn't work.

It doesn't work. I don't know what works. Okay, Patricia. But my hair has now grown, yeah? And I wash it once a week. I get it blow dried. I don't torture it with devices. And I manifest the fact that I've got long, luscious blonde hair.

And you know where it's going to be. going to be up to soon. My ass. And that's where I'm going to keep it. Okay. I went to a hairdress and they're like, um, maybe a lob, a mum lob. No. You mum lob yourself out of here, okay? Because I'm a goddess with long hair. And that's what I've decided. You need to decide what kind of hair you want to have. My tip is just high protein. Don't touch it so much. And let it be. You know what I mean? And by the way, if you don't know this, know this right now.

Men really love natural hair and natural hairstyles. All men. That's what they like. And I know this isn't about the men, but in case you wondering, that funky hairstyle you want to have, is cool. Like, I love it as a woman too. But, like, long hair is just, it's just goddess, okay? Next, skin, massage, cool, posture. Last, find your style, baby. And that means, for me, it was finding my lack of style. My mom is very stylish.

Sometimes my mom looks so stylish that I'm like, can we just take a few pieces off? Because she's got the hat, the shoes, the thing, the thing, boom, boom, mum, boom, bum, this necklace, that necklace, that necklace. Chanel said, you know, before you leave the house, take one thing off because it's too much. Chanel didn't say that to my mum, she just said it in general, okay? For me, finding my style is long, luscious hair, great skin. Don't judge me now, I'm sick, yeah, that would be mean, but great skin, really good makeup. I love a rosy cheek.

I love like a lip balm. I love a fluffy eyebrow. I love a tan. Oh my God. When I do a spray tan, game over for everyone, okay? I love fake eyelashes too like natural looking ones and nails guys oh my god I went and got my nails done and they filed through the nail bed it was a disaster again just paying for things and then it doesn't work out anyway doesn't matter having nice nails that when you talk people see that it's

very amazing there is also something really amazing about just natural nails if you've got natural nails don't put shit on them just be in your natural element like I love a nature goddess you know if that's you. Or I love like a long red nail. If you are like a vamp, if that's your archetype. But deciding a style, are you a vamp? Are you a nature girl? Are you this? Are you that? You don't have to commit. Just commit to it for like six months. Like try something. Because I'm not a hippie girl, okay? I'm not like that kind of girl. But I right now am investing in just my hair, skin nails, because I've got young kids. And I'm wearing the Diana outfit. The diana outfit being a sweater, the shorts and, you know, some kind of jeanne.

or something and I want quality inside something simple. That is my look right now. My lack of style is my style, okay? And my bracelets and jewelry. That's where I'm spending my money. Okay, that is your goddess tips. Love you lots like jelly tots and I'll see you on the next one.