BEING HER with Margarita Nazarenko - 32: How I Balance My Business With Postpartum, Pregnancy, Motherhood & The Truth About My Marriage.

Episode Date: October 30, 2023

In this episode I answer all your recent personal questions about pregnancy, routine, lifestyle and my marriage. Let’s get personal! LINKS:20 feminine energy principles: https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/20femininesalesPolarity MasterClass (20 secrets to long lasting attraction & love) : https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/polarity-masterclassAmazon book list:https://www.amazon.com/shop/margaritanazarenkoBecome Magnetic (Free Ebook): https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/Email me: [e-mail] note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episodeProduced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. Hello, hello, hello, gorgeous human. I listen to podcasts. I watch YouTube videos. That's the type of person that I am. So I am not only a maker of them, but I'm also a consumer of them. And my favorite type is when the YouTuber or the creator of the said content does like an in-depth talk to me, you know, let's have a conversation,

varietal and that is what we're going to do today. I asked you on my Instagram to throw out a couple of personal questions. Some of them are going to be about me, my routines, all of those things. We're going to get deep and personal and meaningful. A lot of them are going to be on the topics that you are used to be talking about, like feminine energy and things like that, but it's going to be a little more intimate. And I've not looked at these questions as of yet. so we are going to delve into them together.

How do you balance being a mom and now running all your social media accounts? By social media accounts, this person means my Instagram, my YouTube, my podcast, all of the things that are going on at the moment. And the honest truth is, I think if, I saw this piece of content today about the fact that if you think you can balance motherhood and work and do it both at 100%, you're going to be sadly mistaken and disappointed, and I couldn't agree more. I think you cannot give 100% to both. Some of them will have to be less attended to, but I will say this. For anyone who's considering becoming a parent or who is a parent, I have not created more.

I have not been more productive and I have not been more on the pulse as I have been since having my son three years ago and now being pregnant. I don't know whether it's because having a child gives you meaning and I know that everyone who's not got a child just wants to smack me across the face right now or whatever it is. But the reality is that for some people and for me included and I think that's because I had my children in my 30s. So just at the start of my 30s with my son and now I'm going to have a daughter. I think I had the perspective of I need to do something amazing or maybe it just aligned at the same time, but I definitely feel this level of motivation coming from having had him.

I feel like I've got to be a role model in some ways. And I said when I didn't know the gender of my second child, that if it is a girl, I feel even more pressure to do so. And everyone was like, why? What's the difference? But I genuinely feel like showing up as a woman in this world, all I've got to do is love my son. And it's his father's role to kind of show him how to be a man. But now I've got to show this girl how to be a woman in this world. And half of the time, as much as I read about it, learn about it, talk to you guys about it, we're all stumbling through it, aren't we? And some things, I don't know what the right thing is to do, like social media and body image and all of these things that are just so difficult to address and so difficult to

combat. I don't always know because we haven't lived through this. We haven't lived through the accessibility that we have to everybody online measuring up against everybody. And I don't know how that's going to impact a young, a female mind. But yes, how do I manage it was the question and how do I balance it? I don't balance it. I just, number one, I feel. motivated by it. I feel motivated that I've got to show up as someone in this world. And I, my son goes to preschool three days a week. And in that time, I manage to create lists and to create goal setting and to create succinct flow in how I make these things happen. What I used to achieve in a, in a week prior to having children, I now achieve in a day or half a day.

For example, if I have a call with America, I have to schedule it at 6 a.m. My time before my son wakes up. Technically, time-wise, I could do it at 8 a.m. I could do it at 7 a.m. I could do it at 9 or 10. But when he's up, there is no Zoom call that you're going to be having, my friend. There is absolutely no Zoom call. So you have to make sacrifices in timing. You have to make sacrifices in what fits into your life.

And you just have to work with it from there. Is this pregnancy harder than your first? For those you don't know again, I'm pregnant again. I'm about eight months pregnant. Hence why, if you can hear me laboring to breathe, this is the thing they don't tell you ladies. It's like Christmas dinner. You've just had Christmas dinner. You've just had the dessert for Christmas dinner. You had the dessert after the dessert, a little bit of candy or whatever, and you can't breathe. That is the biggest feeling that I would describe like pregnancy to you like in the third trimester. you literally feel like, I remember going to lunch with a friend of mine,

she's like, wow, you're really not eating much. Like, you should, you know, you should eat more because, you know, you're eating for two. I'm like, girl, I am trying to eat for two, but nothing fits. Like, my stomach is here. I had a scan of my liver and all this stuff during my pregnancy because I was getting some stabbing pain. And they were scanning my chest. They were scanning my chest to see where my liver is. That's how much the baby's moved up.

But is my pregnancy harder than my first? This pregnancy has, ironically, and I don't know why, maybe my daughter is a kind of person than my son because he is a crazy boy because genuinely hormonally between a girl and a girl there isn't much difference and with a boy, I guess, hormone shifts were different or I don't know whether it's because I don't know. It's just my body now knows what it's doing. But I did have hyperamysis, which I have videos on my YouTube channel about. And if you want to look for that, just search my name and write HG, which is a,

severe form of sickness, which you just throw everything up, you can't even drink water. I had that, but it was better managed this time because I guess my healthcare providers knew that I'm prone to that fun, fun, fun thing. Are you going to take a break from work once you give birth? First of all, for all curious minds, I am going to have a C-section. Why? Because I want some element of control. No, because I had a C-section with my first son, Leo. And, And with this one, they recommend a C-section again. I don't want to do all-natural birth. I don't want any of that.

I just want for something to be... I had the most peaceful, positive C-section experience. It was almost Zen and spiritual-like. I think because my first pregnancy was so turbulent, I was so extremely sick. I was on IVs every three days because I couldn't drink or eat. That at the end, I was like, relent, relent me. like do this for me. I don't want to do this. Someone take the wheel. Jesus or the surgeon,

take the wheel and I want you to do this for me because just I can't. So will I take time off? The idea of the fact that it is a C-section is the premise that I'll have to stay in hospital for five days. Will you see me take that time off is a different story and probably not. I'm trying my hardest and damnedest to batch content. This video is probably going to be coming out, and this podcast is going to be coming out. Maybe end of November, I could have had the baby by then. We don't know.

We don't know. Maybe I didn't. But I'm hoping you won't see any difference in content, but I am hoping I will be able to take two to three weeks off. Keeping in mind, when I had my first child, it was the biggest shock that I've ever experienced in my life. It was the biggest shock I've ever experienced in my life. He was a colic baby.

He cried 24-7. We couldn't go to a cafe. We couldn't go out. It was COVID. I am excited to try a different experience with having a child. I'm genuinely excited about it. I did not have a very normal. There is no normal.

There is no such thing as normal in children or anything. but I'm hoping she'll be a reasonable woman. I'm hoping that she will, you know, sleep in a cafe. I'm always hopeful. I'm a hopeful human being. I always look forward to the, you know, the bright side of things and I want to do a non-COVID post-birth. Like I couldn't see anyone for six months. We were in lockdown. So it was very much trial by fire. Being her is sponsored by Better Help. I don't know if you you guys have tried therapy before. But I will tell you one thing that sometimes trying to achieve a goal in your life can be like swimming upstream. And when you remove the block that you have, you get to it so much faster. Also in terms of pushing through things that I've

stopped you in the past, therapy works wonders. I went from not being able to achieve some things, some big goals in my life, some things I wanted to implement to being able to achieve them all. And therapy is a really great place to do that. And that's where better help comes in. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give them a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible and suitable to your schedule. You just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist. And you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. And I like the fact that you don't have to explain yourself. You just swap. I'm about have a baby. I'm a mom of a toddler. I don't have time to drive and meet someone. But BetterHelp makes

that easier. So if you want to make your brain your friend with BetterHelp, visit BetterHelp.com slash being her today and get 10% of your first month. That's BetterHelphelp.com slash being her. Visit betterhelp.com slash being her today and get 10% of your first month. That's better help help.com slash being her. Will you raise your daughter and son differently? Now, look, it's a very interesting question because raising a daughter and a son differently, even if you don't want to raise them differently, you will have unsuspecting biases and ideas that you have in your head, even if you are the most woke parent and you just want to then

to be exactly the same. You don't even want them to know that they have gender. You will have biases that you don't know. They will come out in ways that you didn't even know they come out in. Like, for example, for some reason, when you were growing up, say you're female, your brother was mean to you or something like that. Something will come out. It's not that you've got to tell them like, boys don't cry or things like that. It's not going to be so obvious, but there will be biases. So I am mature enough to say that, yes, I will raise my daughter and my son differently, but I'm not going to be. I'm not going to be sitting here and saying, my daughter's going to fly in business class while my son flies an economy because men thrive and struggle, even though I do believe that. And I don't believe that

all men thrive and struggle. We should all throw them into struggle and then they will climb out of it heroic like the movie 300. No, I'm not saying that. And I also have beliefs that a man is not a child and a man is not a boy. So I'm raising my son with a lot of empathy, a lot of emotion. I'm there for him. I am constantly observing his emotional state. I don't treat him differently than I would treat a girl, but there will come a time later in life that I know this world, and I believe masculine and feminine don't thrive in the same way.

I believe that he will thrive in different scenarios. And I also believe that the biggest role in a boy's life is his father. So it's very much up to his father to raise him how he will, and for me to love him. and it's very much up to me to raise my daughter how I will and for her father to love him because that is the biggest thing. If a girl is loved by her father and she is told that she is special in all these ways and she, you know, just genuinely loved by him, she's got the best chance in life with self-esteem with how she sees men. I know learning it the hard way that I didn't

have that and it took 30 years to build my self-esteem. So, and I still struggle. so the opposite gender parent just has to love the child. I think this will be the last one about the children, but maybe not. I don't know. Maybe this is what everyone wants to know about, but how did I deal with postpartum? I did not get postpartum depression. I don't know how because I was in COVID and it was hard and my baby had a colic, which means they just scream all the time.

But how did I deal with it? I didn't deal with it. I just robustly, mercilessly slung myself through it. I couldn't get nannies at the time because Australia was in lockdown. I couldn't get any kind of doulas or anything because we couldn't get that. And I didn't have my mom or my parents around. So it was just like trial by fire. I just got through it and I'm not sure how.

I don't have very strong memories of it. but I am both nervous and apprehensive of how it will happen this time and if I can implement better strategies. I will obviously try and hire someone. I don't know how to hire a nanny. It seems that it's harder to hire nanny than it is to find a husband in these streets. Like it is so difficult to find someone you trust. And if you don't have children, it's like if you imagine somebody had to hold one of your vital organs for you all day while you go about doing something else. Like, hi, here's my liver. You hold it. Here's my heart. Here's my whatever. Lungs. And I'm just going to go about my business. And this random person has to look after your literal life source. That is what it feels like to

hire a nanny. And finding one is difficult. But if I want to maintain working and doing everything and sleeping, because with the type of child I had the first time, I'm preempting that my second will be the same because you just have to, you know, prepare or you'll prepare to fail. You know, fail to prepare or you prepare to fail. So assuming that she won't sleep and she'll just scream, I'll need a nanny to take her for an hour while I record this podcast for you, honey. And things like that. Do I have siblings? No, I do not have any siblings.

My mom had me and thought I did a perfect job and that is enough. No, I'm joking. My mom and my dad split up when I was five years old and my mom got into a new relationship when she was in her late 40s. or mid-40s, so she never met a partner with whom she wanted to have children, and let's just be realistic, she didn't really want more than one. Do you follow any kind of diet and what is your self-care routine? The diet that I followed before this was the paleo-stash-keto diet. I found that it suits me so well to be on a high-protein, higher-fat diet because it's satiating, and it made me feel good.

Whereas a lot of people, I think it's so individual. A lot of my friends who have amazing bodies and amazing physiques thrive on a vegan diet, vegetarian, whatever it might be, high carb. Me, my body loves to burn fat or protein for fuel, and I felt my best. When I eat too many things, and I really fall into this pattern quite easily where I start to eat like a pastry or this or that. And I know the recommended thing is like, eat what you want. Don't develop any kind of, you know, habits about this and that.

Don't get too overwhelmed with it. But for me, I like rules. I like rules because I thrive in them and I like structure because I thrive in that. Otherwise, I just get too messy. And I don't know what's going on. So for me, a structure like, I'm going to eat protein. I'm going to eat vegetables. I also include some berries and fruit. And I love dairy. I love protein meats, yogurt, fish, things like that. I really thrive on that. And essentially, if I was to summarize,

my beliefs in eating is you should eat natural food and non-processed food. That's basically it. Things around that, like I can handle dairy, you may not be able to. And the ins and outs of that is very personal. But for me, that is the diet. Since being pregnant, it really, really throws me and I hope my thyroid doesn't have a connection like I did last time with my son, but I got hyperthyroid, which is the fast one. So people who talked to me, they didn't see me because it was locked down, but people who talked to me after I had my son, thought I was on some kind of adderol or something, or what's a drug that makes you really hyper? They thought I develop some kind of ADHD because my thyroid was so hyper, I was like twitchy, crazy,

just insane. So yes, I hope it doesn't do that, but I'm hoping to go back to a keto diet after my daughter's here. The reason that pregnancy really throws me, though, is because in my first three to four months, I can't eat or drink anything. And when you can't eat or drink anything, you don't care about salads, you don't care about protein. You don't care about anything. I could, I just ate crackers, bits of donut, some kind of random crumb. I threw it up anyway. Basically, sorry to be graphic, everyone

who's listening, but I ate things that were easy to throw up because everything would come up anyway. Isn't that fun? Would love to know your morning and nighttime routine as well as spiritual practice, if any. I would say the closest thing I have to a spiritual practice. I would say the closest thing I have to a spiritual practice and all honesty is gratitude. I think that's the thing that's got me furthest in life. I think a shift happened in my success, in my career, in my life, in my marriage, in my relationship, in clarity in all ways, came when I started to deeply understand and feel gratitude in my life. I felt very, very grateful for things, specific things, not random things, not like, I'm just grateful to be alive and I'm grateful I have a home. I wrote down three things I'm grateful

for every night before I went to bed for six months. And that is when my life, I don't know, I got clarity. It was like I knew what I wanted to do. I knew where I wanted to go. I knew the type of person I wanted to appear as in the world. I knew what kind of content I wanted to create. All of it. It was almost like a manifestation practice. But spiritually wise, gosh, I never even know if I've ever addressed this, but God and spirituality-wise, I am connected to something. I'm not going to go into any denomination because I wasn't really raised like that, so I didn't really believe in it. But I went to a school, a church school, church of England school. And obviously, I am Orthodox being Eastern European. I'm Russian Orthodox.

But I never went to church with my mom or had a practice doing that. But I do have a of spirituality. As far as morning and nighttime routines, look, girl, I've got to be honest, I had, I love listening to people's nighttime routine and morning routine, but every day with me is a little bit different. And I love when people come on and they say, my morning routine is no phone till 10 a.m. And I meditate and then I, you know, do my yoga and then I do some kind of downward dog and then, you know, I go into my ice bath and then I do some kind of foam rolling and that's all fantastic. But like I said, to me, at 6 a.m. is when I can take my calls with America because I'm in Australia. To me, 6 a.m. is when I can talk to my mom because she lives in London.

To me, that's when I can reply to all my friends who are abroad. And to me, that is my time before my son wakes up. If he wakes up at 8, I have two hours. to do a lot of business and to do a lot of work. And I know that's not sustainable. And I know that might cause burnout. And I know I should be sitting in the Lotus meditating. And I know I should be writing gratitude journals, but that's just not the reality of my life. And backing up onto that question when you asked about routines and like how I space out my workday and all these accounts, I am.

I wake up at 6 a.m. and I am either on a Zoom call or I am emailing my editor about the latest video that I want her to edit or the website being down or one of my masterclasses having a sale or doing that. Then I talk to my mom for maybe half an hour and then when my son wakes up, I try and be present for him because if I've been meditating and maybe, look, maybe I will change. Maybe I won't look at my phone until 11 o'clock and then only do all those things. But I find that when I have done what I need to for me and in this portion of my life, like my 30s are about building something. My 30s are about building literally my children with my body in my body.

And they're about building my businesses. My 20s were about fun and self-discovery and a lot of trial and tribulation and a lot of angst. And just fabulousness. Like I went on a lot of holidays with my, I met my husband when I was 24 and, you know, we fought a lot and traveled a lot. Like that was it. But our 30s is not our 30s because he's in his 40s, but my 30s is about building and just really head down and doing that.

So I feel more present for my son after I've done two hours of talking to my mom, which is important to me. She is one of my closest friends, if not the closest person to me. I feel more present and grounded if I have. have answered all my emails, if I have progressed, it's like I talked to you in a previous podcast, I believe, or one of my YouTube videos where I said to you, what moves the needle? Like, literally, what is the one thing in your goals that moves the needle? You need to be doing something that moves the needle every day. It might be small. Like, if your goal is to grow your hair and that small

goal is not washing it every day, then that is you moving the needle. That is you moving the needle every day. Okay, I didn't wash my hair today. And for me right now, I'm growing this podcast, I'm growing my community, I'm growing my child. And so if I feel I've gone onto my emails, I've put out some fires, I've planned a few things. I am more ready and more present with my son. Same in the evening. He goes to bed at 8 o'clock and I do a lot of those things too. When he used to nap, I used to, you know, address work as well. But as far as routines, The few magic things that I will tell you is when you first wake up to drink warm slash hot lemon water or apple cider vinegar that will flush your system that gets rid of toxins that will make you beautiful that will enhance your life. Do it.

If you don't do it, you don't know. So do it. That's the first thing. I then always have a black coffee and I'm normally on my emails in bed having this lemon water. I didn't have lemons this morning. So it was just hot water and I was like, my lemons are gone. and then I have a black coffee. It's always black.

Even now when I'm pregnant and I'm having decaf, it's just black coffee, no sugar. I hate additives. I hate additives and things in general. If I'm drinking, I'm drinking. I'm not talking about in pregnancy, but I'm just talking about additives. Like, if I'm drinking, it's vodka on the rocks.

It's tequila on the rocks. At best, it's a martini. Or it's a wine. It's a one thing. Like, why are we making it a cocktail? Why are we making it complicated? It's not, it's not so deep. If it's coffee, it's got to be black.

It's got to be no sugar. If it's tea, it's got to be black tea. It was made and fermented to be the way it's meant to be. Stop ruining it. So I will have my black coffee. For breakfast, if I'm not being silly and eating some kind of croissant or some kind of snail, which is like a curly version of a croissant, I got into that habit when I was sick and it was the only thing I could stomach. I ideally would have full fat dairy yogurt with some kind of blueberries or strawberries

and eggs. That is the routine. Skin care every day. I've started to use very basic skincare, just like seravi or QV. Because I don't want to overcomplicate pregnancy skincare at the moment. Let me tell you, though, baby. Let me tell you one thing. Once this daughter is out, let me tell you I'm going to do lasers. I am going to do active ingredients. I'm going to do it all because I'm sick of walking around non-botoxed and crusty. And if you're non-botoxed, I'm not calling you crusty, but I'm feeling crusty. Like, let me tell you my app the other day, not the other day, two months ago because I'm now eight months pregnant. But at the time, my app said to me, wow, you've spent half. a year pregnant at six months. And I was like, half a year. Half a year, the audacity of how long it takes to make a child is just audacious. Just audacious. Tell me how you manage a routine of

taking care of the house and going to the gym. Baby girl, I have not gone to the gym. I have not seen gym. Jim and I have not been friends since I got pregnant because I was so sick that I didn't want to throw up on the people, you know, at Pilates in the gym. With the household, that is the thing that I let go most of. By the way, when I say household, I don't mean cooking or looking after my loved ones because that is very high priority for me. But let's say right now behind me is San Pellegrino box that I could unpack and put really nicely in the fridge like the Kardashians, but instead I'm doing this video and podcast.

I am replying to emails and I'm going to do some business and some work. And if I had to see a friend, I'd prioritize the friend. I believe I amplify myself more with connection and communication than with that box standing there. That's not to say that that is everybody. Some people need that box cleared away. But I would rather make money and hire people to do the things that I don't want to do. One of those is cleaning the house.

So I have somebody come every fortnight, clean the house. house doing a deep clean of things that I am just tragic at and don't want to be better at because I would rather work more and make more money. And I love those TikTok videos where girls are like amazing at cleaning. They just clean. They are like this like they spray the thing. They do the thing. I don't know what they do. But they are just so incredible. And I love it. And I love that for you. I'm like that with cooking. I love cooking. Some people don't like cooking. I'm like, Don't learn to cook. Outsource.

Outsource everything that does not serve you. But when I'm not pregnant, I did Pilates three times a week. And after I am not pregnant, I am really wanting to start weight training. I really, really want to give that a go because it really changes your constitution. This dog in the background is just living its best life. Are you still in love with yourself? I don't know if that question was a facetious one, if it was a spicy question, or if it was a genuine, like, are you in love with yourself question?

But I will answer it honestly. And that is, I have tried to cultivate love for myself, my whole life, and it is not easy. And am I still is the wrong phrasing because, I guess the better for, phrasing would be, have I found love for myself? And I'm working on it every day, baby girl. Like, it is the thing, isn't it? I think love for yourself comes from actions that serve you. For example, doing the things you love for yourself like you would for a person you love. So I'm trying to show myself love every day. How did your relationship with you and your husband grow and develop, and how does he feel about you giving all the secrets away and blessing your other women with the secrets?

Number one, my husband has never watched a piece of my content. My husband is the most interesting person in terms of like he does not want to know other people's business. And I know this isn't other people's business. This is literally his wife. But when I'm like, don't you want to see what I'm talking about? He's like, I've seen you talk around me often enough that I don't need to listen to your podcast. How does he feel about it? happy for me because he thinks I have a lot to say and that I'm intelligent, I guess,

is what he says is his favorite quality of mine. I don't believe him. But, you know, he says it to be nice. And how has our relationship changed? We were butting heads and fighting the whole beginning of our marriage. I don't know what it is that inspired us to get together, but it was like this mutual attraction and knowledge that we have the same values. And now it's kind of ironed out because I am teaching people on my masterclasses, especially the polarity one, things that I learned. The reason I know these things is because I almost killed myself doing the opposite. I chased guys that I was not right for. I did all the wrong things. I had all the desperate energy. I had all the masculinity. And even with my husband who was so into me, I almost pushed them away.

So if you go onto my website, you will see the Polarity Masterclass. If you read about it, that's all the things that I learned and that's how I shifted my life. So it's not just out of nowhere that I come up with it. It was a learning process of reading, doing my diploma in life coaching and doing all these things that really shifted it. How has Leo been handling the fact that he is going to be a big brother? Look, I think for a child, especially his age, he doesn't really. understand the reality. I mean, I didn't understand when I was 31 and I had Leo what the reality of a baby is. So let's ask him when it actually arrives because right now I think he thinks it's a

gimmick. It's a joke. We're all having a laugh. But wait until he understands the reality of it. I think he is going to have a very different understanding of what all of that means. What is your husband's occupation? My husband's occupation is orthopedic surgeon. Tips on starting a podcast or Instagram, where to start. I will tell you one thing of how I started, and I hope that gives you a tip. I was working in the industry and doing Instagram and things for many, many years, and I did grow a following, but it was like pulling teeth. It was difficult.

And then TikTok came out in 2020. I got into it in like 2022, very late, but I finished my diploma in life coaching. and I thought, nobody knows me on TikTok as, you know, the girl who's talking about life development and feminine energy, let me just go on there and put out a video every day. I went on there, put a video out every day, and within a year, I got to 800,000 followers. Now, it's not about follow account. It's more about engagement and all that stuff. And this is not a vanity metric. I'm not trying to show off.

But the point I'm trying to illustrate is that before it was like pulling teeth and then suddenly, it was easy. How and what was the difference? It was in the fact that my content was needed and necessary and timely. I am not saying that to stroke my own ego or to pat myself on the back. I'm just saying that as a one can see from the evidence that people wanted to hear what I was talking about. When I was talking about lifestyle and fashion and beauty, there were lots of people who were talking about that kind of content and I'm not the best. In fact, I really like, like to wear a bump suit at the moment, which if you don't know about is the best for pregnancy, I like to wear a shirt over and that's it. If I start to wear, make fashion content, I wouldn't

be being myself. Myself is a pretty simple person with a lot of like when it comes to dressing, but with a lot of ideas in my head. I've always got something to talk about. I've always got something to express. I've always got an idea at the tip of my tongue. I'm always into self-improvement. I want to help people do that. And I have very, very strong ideas about polarity, masculinity, femininity, and I really believe in marriage and making that thrive. So my tip to you is if you have something to give, start a podcast, start an Instagram, start a TikTok, start a YouTube channel. People will come to you because you have that thing to give in abundance and it will change their lives and once it does, they will subscribe. That is my tip. How do you and your husband maintain intimacy

with kids? I think you have to find a youthful joy and a genuine indulgence and love for parenting and being in this young child stage. It's not the flying to Paris. It's not the flying to Vegas. It's not the, you know, it can be. You can do it however you want it. But both me and my husband are so into enjoying these little creatures. We've only got one, but we'll have two soon, knock on wood, to enjoy. Like, this is such a fleeting time. There are toys everywhere around me right now because the choice was clean them up or make this content.

And I'd rather talk to you. I'm a communicator. and it's about people, it's about growth, and it's about connection. So for me, that's what it's about. And I'm lucky that my husband was made to be a dad. He thrives in it. If I made to be a dad, I don't mean he changes every diaper. I don't mean he's there at my back and call.

No, I don't mean that. It's mainly my job. But he just sees the value in providing for a family and being the father figure in the family. So if you have a playfulness about it and at the same time a legacy to it, I believe that there isn't any thing bad about it. It's quite exciting to grow something together. Is there a reason you're so smart about things?

Is it because you've had a rough past? I would rephrase it as tough instead of rough because rough indicates to me almost like a gritty, tumultuous past. I've not been married before. I've not had, you know, a rough, you know, upbringing. But I've had a tough life in terms of being an immigrant when I was very young and not speaking the language when I came to England.

As in not having a father in my life of family except for my mum. As in watching her struggle to provide for me. As in all those things which create for a tough upbringing, but I wouldn't say a rough one. like it's been a little bit tough. And I've had to learn a lot of things that I suppose one might learn, but in a very different way, which is why I have the tips and the knowledge because I've had to learn it.

If I didn't have to learn it, I wouldn't know how to teach it. Last question is, what have you done for work over the years? My first job was in a restaurant called Sticky Fingers, which is at Rolling Stones Restaurant. If you know the reference to the album, you know, It was like a burger joint and ribs or whatever when I was 16, 17 years old. Then I went to drama school and in order to have money while at drama school, I worked in

nightclubs on the door, serving bottles, things like that. So I'd go to school in the day and then I'd work in the nightclubs at night. After I left drama school, I did theatre, I did plays. I did television, things like the bill and doctors, and later on I did home and away when I came to Australia, just bit parts and things like that. I then never wanted or designed to be a model because I never saw myself that way, but I fell into modeling because acting work wasn't always around. So I did commercial modeling. I did Miss Universe. I got opportunities from that.

I worked in Playboy as a Playboy Bunny for the longest time. And then once I came to Australia, I started working in modeling full time until I got a job presenting for real estate show, which was like homes. You know, when you see luxurious homes and there's a presenter on there taking you around the home. Some were for sales. Some were just for viewings. so I became a real estate presenter. I would write the scripts. I would tour these homes and I would make videos, not myself, a whole production. It was like a whole team in production. And that's what I did. And then I did a diploma in coaching and that's what I'm doing right now. So those were my jobs,

a lot of hustling. But like Steve Jobs said, there's a lot of dots that come together in order to make who you are now. but profession-wise, I've got a bachelor's in arts. So yeah, thank you so much for watching. I lasted long enough to talk for 40 minutes. I hope it wasn't too laborsome to listen to me. Thank you so much for everybody who subscribes, who likes, who gives a five-star review, who is there, because if you don't show up, it's hard for me to show up,

and you make it very easy. So thank you. I see you. I'll see you on the next one. Bye.