BEING HER with Margarita Nazarenko - 50: Scared To Age as a HIGH VALUE FEMININE WOMAN? Listen to this.

Episode Date: March 4, 2024

PRE ORDER MY NEW BOOK : THE NEW RULEShttps://snipfeed.co/margaritanazarenkoThere are a lot of questions when it comes to aging and finding a place in society. What does aging mean when it comes to being high value? Can you still be in your feminine? Should he still be the provider? Lets talk about it.LINKS:20 feminine energy principles: https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/20femininesalesPolarity MasterClass (20 secrets to long lasting attraction & love) : https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/polarity-masterclassAmazon book list:https://www.amazon.com/shop/margaritanazarenkoBecome Magnetic (Free Ebook): https://www.margaritanazarenko.com/Email me: [e-mail] note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.Produced by Dear Media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Hi, friends. I'm Cameron Rogers, host of Frecklet Foodie and Friends podcast, which is now on Dear Media. Are you wondering what just happened to your life after having a baby or struggling with your mental health during postpartum? That was made just a few months ago. Are you working on healing your relationship with yourself, your body, and or food? Same. We are all on a journey to self-love and acceptance, and I'm right there with you. That's what Freckled Foodian friends is all about, remind you that no matter what, you are not alone. Make sure to tune in for Season 5, launching with Dear Media on November 9th, and subscribe to listen to new episodes every Wednesday morning.

Today I'm coming to you from my balcony. I am sitting in a white robe with blue evil eyes on it, and I am embracing Australian nature. Usually I try and podcast from a space that is inside the home, evading any kind of sounds. But you know what? We're original on this. podcast by original, I mean, we need to just embrace other aspects of living because we can't always do everything the same way. It's always been done, i.e., you know, nice podcast studio, nice sound. That's all great, but today we're embracing the sounds of nature because we're going to talk about high value women and aging. This topic, I'm going to be honest, isn't something I am going to sit here and just tell you, yep, I know exactly what I'm talking about. This is the way. Well, I do know exactly

what I'm talking about because this is my forte, but I'm not going to give you some kind of of medicinal approach to solving this issue for you. If you are scared to age as a woman, you are in the majority. If you are scared to age as a woman, it's not because you are stupid and have nothing else to offer. It is because it is the way society is. So don't worry about that. Oh, I take back my words. I was wrong. Everyone films in studio in a quiet place because people out in the streets are wild. They are wild. We did not hear the Australian nature. We heard a man with chainsaw or boat or something, okay? Men ruining the day.

The thing about being a high-value woman, as it's spoken about in social media and things like that, is the whole notion that you have value because, I suppose in society, maybe your youth is valued. There's the whole notion of the invisible woman syndrome that you develop in your 50s and 60s. I'm not necessarily saying that you have that or that you're going to have that. I am not putting that on you, but it is a syndrome that people, women, describe in society where once they were beautiful and men bent over backwards to do things for them. And generally, in society, they were respected and, you know, their opinions mattered. People looked at them. And now suddenly

they hit 50 and nobody can even see them. It's like they're invisible. People, their younger people don't see them because she's an old woman and she's irrelevant. Men don't see them because she's not, you know, young and fertile and, you know, men like women in their 20s or whatever the notion is. The whole concept is the fact that you become a little bit invisible and it's scary to age. I get it because a lot of our power is held in our youth. And before you hit the age of, I would say, 35, you do not realize how much of it is held in our youth. And I'm not saying at 35 year older, because a lot of women look, contrary to popular belief, better in their 30s than they do in their 20s, especially with the adage of modern, you know, cosmetics and surgery girl, people look better. I've seen hundreds of people look better,

but we all understand that. Once you hit your 40s, especially, you start to see there's a shift. The way to escape that fear is the psychological shift that I'm going to talk to you about. I want to, I don't want to number them right now. We'll number them at the end, but I've written them down. And the first psychological shift that you need to make if you are scared of aging and if you're a woman who's dating and if you're a woman who's even married because you don't want to lose your husband's attention and maybe you're afraid you will is number one. It's a privilege to age. Baby. The alternative to not aging is not aging is. And what is not aging means. It means dying. Let's not be around the bush. That's what it means. So if you are not aging, then you do not have the privilege to be here. You need to understand

how much of a privilege it is. We did not always have modern medicine. We did not always have the amazing capacity to be able to diagnose, to go to the doctor, to keep living, to have a healthy diet, to have food accessible to us. Our ancestors fought mammoths and died so that we could be here and we could be aging. We are not like the bronco buck out in the wild being eaten by a lion. So we are privileged to age and there is only a few mammals who do that that age and those are the ones who help care for their grandchildren okay so there's a purpose for us that is first of all that is the first of all mindset that you need to make and this podcast isn't just for people who are aging this is podcast for women in their teens 20s and 30s because it's something that you need to think about

and embrace the second thing is the joy of aging the joy of aging gracefully or disgracefully disgracefully is how I plan to age I don't care what you say I am going a facelift by the time I need a facelift. Let me tell you the facelifts are going to be, the little robots are going to walk into my face and lift it manually and hold it there while I live and probably move it around to move my expressions. But anyway, as you age, a lot of you I know who listen to this have an anxious attachment style. Your anxious attachment style heals and it is like a travesty. I guess though it is natural that you replace youth for wisdom and that is a fair trade because what was once young and appealing and you know, you had the longitude of life and a long time to understand who you are.

What was once long is now shorter. Your life is shorter, your 40, 50, 60s, but as you age, you give less fucks. You don't care as much. You gain a confidence and a peace that you didn't have and your anxious attachment heals. A lot of times when women say, how do I heal it? How do I heal it? How do I make sure that, you know, he's into me? How do I? Trust me, there is not many 50-year-old women writing to me asking me, how do I make sure that he's into me? How do I make sure that he's into me? How do I make sure that he texts me back. How do I make sure that, you know, I appeal to him? It's always the 21-year-old hot chick. Why? I don't know. We just don't have that confidence. We don't know the gravitas and the power that we have. If you gave a woman in her 20s, the wisdom of a woman in her 50s,

let me tell you, she would rule the world. She would rule the world because girls, you have no idea what power you have in your 20s, but you just, I guess, with great power comes great responsibility and you just don't understand how much it means to have that power. Number next is you value the looks that you do have, which you didn't in the past. This one's powerful. I know you've been there. I've been there. We've all been there. You look at a photo of yourself five years ago when you thought you were the biggest, ugliest, most disgusting slob of an animal and you look back at it and you're like, seriously, seriously, Rebecca, seriously, Jennifer, seriously Amanda, Samantha, seriously. Seriously. Olga, you thought you were ugly there.

You will never be as young and as beautiful as you are now, but that's a point that's going to come up later. You start to value the looks that you do have. As you age, you sit into the reality of what you actually look like. So let's say you've got a nicely proportioned face. In your 20s and your teens, it's very rare to find a girl who would be like, yeah, you know, I've got really nice proportioned features and I'm going to accentuate that. But let me tell you, when you're in your 40s, women embrace what they have

in this most confident, comfortable way. And I'll tell you something about being sexy, which comes later in life. Being sexy is the idea that you have such self-confidence that somebody doesn't know how to get that self-confidence, but they want to think of a man when you see a sexy man. It's because you want to touch him and you're attracted to him because he's got such an ease of confidence.

You never see a sexy man who's like stuttering and falling over himself. No, a sexy man is someone who possesses confidence. And what you want to do as a human being is be close to him, and almost to, through osmosis, get that confidence from him. That is what sexiness means and you can easily possess that as you get older. You start to value yourself, accentuate yourself. You've got long legs, suddenly you start to notice that. If you could take some of that into your youth, if you are young now, start to accentuate

your features because genuinely, when you look back on your photos, when you thought you were ugly, you are not ugly. As you age, number four, you gain an energy that is different. It's not cute. It's not princess. It's a queen energy. A queen energy is this energy of being able to appreciate other women. I've said this before in my TikToks, but if you are with a man and other women are flirting with him, the worst thing you can do

is start to compete with those women because you have now gone to fan status. You are now in the status of all the other women who are fanning over him. If you are already with him, or even if you're just dating, or even if you've been on one date, if you project that queen energy, queens don't compete. Think of the real queen, a real queen that you might think of, whoever that is in your head, going to run around competing. They're not a fan. They don't go watch rock bands and, oh my God, oh my God, Mick Jagger looked at me. No, they already possess their status and their station. And even if you don't feel like the most confident piece of ass, hottest peach, whatever it is, hottest pie in the oven, if you project that queen-like energy of, yeah, I'm already in my status, all these people are fans,

but of course you like me, that man is going to believe that that is in fact the case. And the older you get the more established in your queen energy you become, you are more comfortable in that energy, you sit in that energy, you're not running around like a headless chicken, and that makes you so irresistible. Next is you are able to be more selective without the panic of procreation. Now, listen, this one is not easy to explain, but even if you do not want children, if you believe you don't want that, there is a high pressure in our 20s for women to find a partner to perhaps have those children with and the majority of us do want to have children. By majority, I mean more than 50%. Yeah? So even if you don't want to, it's like a biological need to find a partner and maybe settle

down, maybe not. You're trying to assess that. Maybe get married as you age and you've already done the marriage and you've already done the thing and maybe you've decided you don't want to do the thing. You don't need to run around trying to find a man who's a provider because you now have a job, have a certain status, have a certain lifestyle that you want. You don't need to have that desperate energy of trying to find a man who is going to be all those things for you. It's really hard. And I think as the world becomes more less of a man's world and more of a woman's world, not that it matters which one is which. I'm just saying the way the world is it's a man's world. The nine to five, you know, we don't adhere to women's cycles. We deal to a man's cycle, clock in, clock out. It really

works for their hormones to have a two-day weekend. It doesn't work for hours. We can work seven days straight when we're on our ovulation and then we need maybe a week off when we are on our period, but that's another podcast entirely. The point being is that you don't need to cram everything in your 20s. When you are older and you're dating, you can be more selective. You don't need to go for Tom Dick or Harry because he turned up on your doorstep and you need to finish your uni degree, start working, have your children get married, da-da-da-da-da. You don't need all that. The pressure's gone a little bit. You're dating to enjoy the person. Next is, you know, we talk about feminine energy a lot. Right. So as you get older,

you can choose, especially once you go through menopause, you can choose whether you want to remain in your feminine energy or not. Now, I will say this, men will always fall for feminine energy, even older men, even as you are older. If you remain playful and happy and all those things that men enjoy about feminine energy, watch my other videos if you choose to want to explore that. You can do that. Or you can choose to be more in the masculine role and that might work. As women age and they go through menopause and they lose their estrogen, they become more masculine. and not in a bad way, but in a way that they can deploy both energies much more easily. If you've always felt that you want to be more the leader in a relationship,

you can now find a man whose testosterone is also dropped, and you can date him and you can be more in the leader role without that resentment that you would have had in your youth, because in your youth you would have been working, you would have been looking after the children, you would have been having the children, you would have been doing it all, but as you age, you can have more of an equal relationship with a man if that's what you've always desired. Or, if you wish not to, you can remain in your feminine and find a masculine man. We have more opportunities as you age as a high value.

woman to go for, yeah, I'll go for 50-50, yeah, I'll go for being the feminine. Yep, actually, I want to be the masculine. You can become more playful with your sexuality and your relationships. Whilst in your youth, while you're having children, I really adhere to the fact that just stay in your feminine, because you cannot take on the male and the feminine roles as you go through life. Next is, if you are an average-looking person, which the majority of us are, with time, you can learn your face and you can become better looking. via surgery, creams, getting to know yourself, getting to know your color palette, getting to know what you want to wear, buying the clothes you want to wear. If you notice young women who don't have

money, don't have anything that is going to university, they're just beautiful by the fact that they are young. They have this like youth to them, even like movies that are coming of age movies that when I used to watch them as a kid, these people look like teenagers. I watch them now. They look like children. You know what I mean? They now look like kids. People are beautiful in their youth just by being human. It's like my son is beautiful. He's three years old. He can look ragged. He have chocolate all over his face. It's beautiful. But as you age, it's a more curated beauty. You can choose what you want to look like. You can curate your style. You know your sophomore. You've got money to throw out the problem. If you want to call it a problem, I wouldn't call it a

problem. But you've got money to throw at the situation. And if you really, really want to, you can have surgery. If there's something that's really super bothering you or you don't like, you can have surgery. You can have your eyebrows tattooed, whatever it is. Look, I haven't looked into it yet. I have not reached that stage, but you can do that as you age and curate your beauty more. It becomes more curated, more manufactured and more interesting. It's not just about being young and fluffy and fruity. It's more interesting. Next is, and I touched on this earlier, is if you still want a provider man, you just need to understand one thing and this will get you through. To be feminine, you need to add joy, happiness and playfulness to a man's life. And for a man to be masculine, he needs to provide for you and create stability. That is the feminine masculine transaction in the relationship. If you are dating and you are older and you want to provide a man and you're writing to me as you often do, how do I find a provider? I'm past the age of reproduction. Da da da da da da da. Just act like a playful kitty bunny. Bunny kitty bunny. And you will attract that kind of man. Everyone has something that they're attracted to. And if you're easy going, happy, go lucky, in awe of him, all that jazz, you don't have to

be like I said earlier. We can be in our masculine energy. We can be anything we want now, ladies, right? But if you enjoy that masculine feminine exchange, be in your playful energy and you can still have that. There are plenty of men who will want that type of energy exchange and it's up to you to curate it. Just don't be an angry rat in the corner that we talk about, the haggard raccoon. If you're going to be the haggard raccoon, you're not going to attract a man of masculine energy. That's it. I'm sorry, it's just not going to happen. Next. Now, we might not want to hear this, but it is true. If you spent time, in your youth cultivating your knowledge, charisma, personality, you know have a chance to lead with it.

You know, women complain a lot, oh, he just wants me for my bum, boobs, whatever. Now, ladies, you have a chance to lead with something else. Now, I'm not saying he won't want you for your bum and boobs when you're 45. Listen, one of my hottest friends with the best body is 45. You know who you are, if you're listening to this. Her body is like 10 years old than mine, but way, way more impressive. She's literally like a goddess.

She eats right, she exercises, she is just incredible. But you can also lead with your charisma. You would have cultivated things that you can now lead with, that you've always wanted to lead with, and you can be more in that power and stronger with that. Next, I think it's really important to find a place where you are needed in society. I think part of the Invisible Woman's Syndrome is that men find a place of power in society because as a man ages and he is successful and he's powerful, he is respected. I think ladies, if you're watching this, what we need to do is take our power,

back in terms of matriarchy. Not that we need to rule the world, it's either patriarchy or matriarchy, but I mean, if you do have a family or you do, or you do have a business, or you do have something that you're minding over, ruling over and queening over, you need to really deploy great energy over that. You need to know that you have ownership over that. You need to be in your queen energy and look forward to it. If we all age as women, and we know we have this next exciting 40 years coming up from 50 to, you know, 80, 90, then it becomes an exciting period. Know that if you chose the family life, you are required and desired as a grandmother and you should cultivate that. No, if you chose a business, you're required and desired as a businesswoman because we're

living longer. You need to find your place in society and we need to all stop being so scared and so adhering to society's rules of the fact that we're disposable after a certain age. Lastly, I learned a lesson from my mom who came to see me as I had my daughter. I had my three-year-old son and my two-month-old daughter. My mom came for two weeks and left exhausted and she said the one thing she learned from being here is to cherish her free time. As you age, you get more of it and you get more time to cultivate who you want to be because there is this rush from about the age of 20 to 45 of university, jobs, kids, blah, blah, parents, all of this stuff. It's such a rush. It's such a blur. If you're watching this,

you can see I've got a towel on my head. You understand that this is a blur. You need to fit in what you can fit in, where you can fit in. And my mum said, man, your lifestyle, I forgot what it's like to have children. No wonder she only had one is not for me. Thank you for having these babies for me. I'll see you when they're 10. She didn't really say that, but she didn't in her eyes, you know. And listen, as you get older, you get time to be bougie. You get time to, you know, drink your champagne. You get time to look after yourself. You get time for that boozy life. And lastly, I'll finish on this, a question that's often asked. Should you still pay on a date? Should you not pay on a date? how should you date if you're a woman who is older and not looking to have children but looking to date?

What I will tell you is this. You choose how you want to do it. If you want a man who's in his masculine, you set the precedent of you being in your feminine. And if he asks you out, the person who asks is the person who pays. That's a simple rule. And I would advise women who want to be in their feminine, don't ever ask a man out. Very simple. Very simple. Then there is no discussion on who should pay. Because he asked you out. You know, the person who asks another person out, even in a business setting, one who pays because you don't know my financial situation. Let's just say me and you're going on a meeting. Let's say you really like my channel or my podcast and you invite me somewhere. You presume my situation, but you don't know it. So you invite me to the place that you can afford. If it's Starbucks,

then it's Starbucks, baby. But you would never invite me to an expensive restaurant and expect me to split the bill because you don't know who I am. You don't know me from a bar or soap, do you? So you might think you know me. So the person who invites is the person who pays. And if you want to be in your feminine energy, then you cultivate. You are the woman. You are the center of the relational stratosphere. So if you're older and you want a feminine masculine relationship with the provider, cultivate it that way. If you want a 50-50, cultivate it that way. If you want to be more masculine, cultivated that way. That is what I'm going to say. Thank you so much for listening, lending me your ear. Thank you for subscribing. If you subscribe, listen, and I see you in real life.

It's on me and you are best friends, okay? Right. Love you, lots like jelly dots. I'll speak to you soon. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.