Being there for your kids - Are You Grateful? Do You Affirm?

Episode Date: April 10, 2019

As parents, we correct, teach, encourage our children to do things right and the right way. That comes with the job of good parenting. However, can you be grateful and affirm as well? Your child will be uniquely himself. He may do or say things differently than you. That's okay. It gives him a chance to explore his creativity and explore who he is. Would you really want a mini-me? As you interact with your child, take time to express your gratitude and affirmation of who he is becoming. It's a teachable moment and he will glow from your words.

Hi, I'm Dr. John Robinson, and this is Teachable Moments. A lot of parents seem to be stuck on correction and consequences. My question to you today, are you grateful? Do you affirm? As parents, we do a lot of directing, instructing, and correcting with our children. It comes with the territory. But my question for you today is, are you also grateful for your child? And do you affirm him? All of these qualities can lead to teachable moments. Twelve-year-old Buck lived up to his nickname. Being Henry Jr. just did it. didn't cut it. So his folks went with Buck. Boy, did his nickname ring true. He seemed to try to buck all the rules. Buck, I showed you how I wanted the icing on the cookies. Why are you doing it differently? asked his mama while they were preparing cookies for the party. I don't know, pondered Buck. I just wanted to try it this way. Now Mama has no choice. She can assert her

rightful parental authority by telling Buck to start over and ice the cookies the way she had told him. Even saying it nicely would lead her to direct instruct and correct her son. Or, she could think, it's only cookies. How they look is not important. This thinking might lead her to be grateful for Buck's help on the project and to affirm his creativity in adding his own touch. The mindful parent is aware of both her own needs and feelings as well as those of her child in the moment. When you look for the bigger picture, you may capture a teachable moment. Mama saw Buck's tentative look, like he expected to be scolded for doing something wrong. You know, she decided to handle the situation. There are lots of ways to decorate cookies. No.

right way. She reached over to hug her son even as he jokingly tried to pull away. I like your creativity. It's your personal touch on the cookies. Good for you. Buck lit up and beamed as he went back to icing the cookies. Are you grateful for your child's efforts, even if they are different than expected? Are you affirming his individuality and creativity? Are you creating teachable moments that he will remember forever? I'm Dr. Jonathan C. Robinson, licensed clinical psychologist and Christian author, and this has been Teachable Moments, Building Blocks of Christian Parenting, is available online at AmazonBooks.com and in local and national bookstores. More on Dr. Robinson at TMC-P-I-N-C.com.