Being there for your kids - Find The Blessing

Episode Date: August 11, 2024

Did you know? What you pay attention to grows. If you labor on what's wrong, you might mis what's right. In this podcast, I help you find the blessing amidst the struggles and difficulties of your life. Mentalligent psychotherapy (MPT) is a means of doing so. Check it out.

Robinson and this is teachable moments. Today I'm going to ask you to find the blessing in the middle of your hardships. Blessings come in all shapes and sizes and forms. While the reference has a spiritual connotation, generically a blessing is a positive spin on an event that benefits you in some way. My patients seek me out in part because they are dealing with extreme and confusing emotions, a life-altering trauma, or relational issues and are just out of sorts. I've even had some folks tell me they feel cursed. So my job is to help them find the blessing in their upside down life. Intelligent Psychotherapy, which I also call MPT,

is my vehicle as they travel the path of their healing journey. I tell folks that I'm not a why doctor. I'm not going to just help them feel better. I'm not going to just help them get over the difficult past. Rather than why did this happen to me, I'm a what doctor? What's going on here? Over what can I exercise control? What's the path forward? Universally, we have no control over events that have happened to us. However, we have every control over how we respond to them. I assure folks that I will act as their guide on their healing journey, helping them make positive, self-affirming, better choices, and creating their own good life.

So, Robert, I'm glad you made this first appointment with me. How can I help? He started his first session with me. From the jump, I want to be affirming. My subliminal message to him is simply, I can help. Well, Doc, I've been battling depression. It seems my whole life. Robert exhaled deeply, slumping his shoulders and casting his gaze downward. You certainly seem to be at rock bottom, I responded, with empathy, and then continued, tell me how your depression has impacted you today. Well, let's see. Robert paused to put his thoughts together. The alarm went off, and I slammed it and threw it across the room. Then I went back to sleep, ending up being late for work again. My boss tapped his wristwatch as he silently passed me in the hall.

I thought, oh crap, here we go again. Robert fell silent. Wow, I exclaimed, rough start for the day. I paused thoughtfully. I'm going to ask you something that may be farthest from your mind, so take a moment before you answer me. Robert took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, and he replied, Okay, let me have it.

For just a moment, and just for me, for now, tell me something, however small or remote that happened today that gave you a small sliver of hope that your life is not completely going to hell in a basket. He sighed again, sitting quietly before joking sarcastically. You don't ask for much, do you? I gave him time to think. You know, I didn't ask, nor expect Carol to pop in my office and offer me a cup of coffee later that morning. That was nice. I leaned forward in my chair before acknowledging, great. Good for you, Robert. Take that cup of coffee with heartfelt thank you, every time it's offered. I then concluded, you know, a wise man once told me that what you pay attention to grows. Pay attention to the bad and it grows. Pay attention to the good and it grows. Which do you

think is going to help you lift your weighty depression? In my new book, The Healing Journey, overcoming adversity on the path of the good life, I introduced mental intelligence psychotherapy to elegantly weave together mindfulness, positive psychology, and cognitive behavioral strategies to help patients changed their life course from a downward spiraling to an upward spiraling. Robert began his first session with me by telling me part of his downward spiraling life story. I asked him to stay in the moment when I told him to tell me something that happened today. And then I asked him to change his focus to something positive when I said, that gave you a sliver of hope.

And then I gave him a cognitive behavioral strategy when I asked him to find the good. MPT is an elegant means to help your patients find the problem. blessing on their path to the good life. Blessings, Dr. John. If my comments have stirred questions of your own, contact me through my website at www. Thereformykidst.com or email me at John Robinson 00 at bell-south.net.

I'm Dr. Jonathan C. Robinson, licensed clinical psychologist, and author of Teachable Moments Building Blocks of Christian Parenting, and my new book, The Healing, The Healing, Overcoming Adversity on the Path to the Good Life. Teachable Moments, Building Blocks of Christian Parenting is available online at AmazonBooks.com and in local and national bookstores. More on Dr. Robinson at TMC-P-I-N-C.com.