Being there for your kids - Helping Your Child with Weight Management

Episode Date: August 16, 2019

Our children are constantly growing, getting bigger, developing their adult bodies. That growth will not stop until age 18-25 years. If your child is a bit pudgy, she will likely grow into her adult weight without extra effort. We all tend to grow out before we grow up. However, if her weight is a concern for her, or if it limits her fun activities or self-image, then you may want to help her address her concerns.  First, active listen her feelings. Help her fully understand how she feels about her current weight. Then, with permission, give her the stats on her current weight. If she does not have a medical condition, called obesity, then her being a little pudgy can be addressed with nutrition, weight management, and behavioral strategies. Let her take the lead on if/how she wants to address her concerns, but have her back in terms of cheerleading, food prep, and exercise. If you could stand to lose a pound or two as well, then join her in her adventure. Joint goals are always a shared experience that can lead to greater emotional bonding and teachable moments.

Hi, I'm Dr. John Robinson, and this is Teachable Moments. Let me ask you, is your child a little pudgy? Seven-year-old Julie doesn't run as fast as her best friend, Ava. She never wins a race, even though she tries really hard. Because she's a bit pudgy, she has always picked last during recess when they choose up for kickball. Mom mentioned the weight concerns when she last took Julie for her annual checkup. Julie's doctor seemed not to make a big deal out of the extra weight, indicating that the scale. show that she is still within the average range for her age. So, is there a problem here?

Well, yes. If Julie is self-conscious about her weight and sees herself as losing out on stuff because of it, then that makes it a problem. As the parent, your go-to response is to active listen Julie's feelings and concerns. It will be hard not to dismiss or diminish Julie's feelings because the physician did not have a concern, and she still is in the average really, really, try to avoid judging, criticizing, and giving solutions. These are the three cautions to active listening. Most parents see it as their right and that their children actually want to be criticized, judged, and be given solutions. This is what I call exercising your power at the expense of your relationship with your child. In our country, childhood obesity is a national epidemic.

Obesity is clinically defined as carrying a weight which is at least 20% over the average range for your age and bone structure. Okay, sweetheart, I can see how really upset you are about your weight. Now that you are calmer, do you want to look at ways we can work together to help you lose that pudginess? With Julie's permission, begin listing options on a paper. Healthy only snacks, family exercise time. Affirmation posted is like, I'm doing great, no more pudgy. Being me is okay. Help her make her plan and get her permission to help her stick to it. Weigh her after awakening and before breakfast every morning, and have her chart her weight daily. Praise and brag on her with every pound she loses, no matter how long it takes.

Now, with all this being said, keep in mind that Julie is still developing. Children tend to grow out before they grow up. Extra weight often precedes a growth spurt. So, help her be patient and not be so hard on herself. The human body is not fully formed for most people until they hit 18 to 25 years old. Is your child a little pudgy? Address her feelings before helping her tackle her weight concerns, and you will find yourself in a very teachable moment.

I'm Dr. Jonathan C. Robinson, licensed clinical psychologist and Christian author of Teachable Moments, Building Blocks of Christian Parenting, and this has been Teachable Moments. Teachable Moments, Building Blocks of Christian Parenting, is available online at AmazonBooks.com and in local and national bookstores. More on Dr. Robinson at TM. P-I-N-C-P-I-N-C dot com.