Being there for your kids - Holiday Gatherings

Episode Date: October 23, 2021

The holidays are upon us and all of us want to get back to a normal gathering, putting the pandemic behind us, right? Uh, no! With vaccinations in full swing, gatherings are more do-able, but with good planning. In my first letter, I share with the writer several ways to plan for low risk family gatherings. In my second letter, Debbie Downer laments celebrating the holidays this year for "just the two of us," because of distance and limitations. I encourage creativity in making a special occasion for the two of them. Also, I share two rules for addressing depression that will also give the holidays a boost for DD.

Hi, I'm Dr. John Robinson, and this is Teachable Moments. I have a few more letters for you today. Here's the first one. Dear Dr. Robinson, now that the country is slowly returning to normal after two years of pandemic, we're wanting to celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas in a big way. You know, make up for lost time. We have a large family with grown kids, grandkids, friends, and neighbors. We've all been cooped up for far too long. One can only Zoom, but so much. How can we all get together and still be safe. Signed, done with the distance. Dear Dunn, you are certainly not alone in wanting to carefully make your way back from the pandemic. You want what's best for all involved. Good for you. Several key points come to mind. First, make a guest list. It may be a y'all come kind of family affair. However, to err on the side of caution, you want everybody to know the rules and circumstances up front.

put all of that in your invitation to the holiday gatherings. Second, encourage vaccinations for all who are eligible to get them. If some are ready for their booster dose, encourage that as well. If you expect some guests to not be vaccinated for reasons of health, religion, or politics, then the extra caution would be for all party goers to be masked up for the gathering. Third, for meal time, instead of large tables that may accommodate 10 to 12 people, consider smaller gatherings of 4 to 6 with social distance between the tables. Instead of family-style serving from platters on a table for each plate, consider restaurant-style where the plates are filled in the kitchen and brought to the table. Finally, allow for some of your family members to be offended by these restrictions.

They can choose to opt out and you'll miss them. I appreciate that all of this sounds like a lot. You did ask me how to put together a family gathering carefully. With these considerations, you will have wonderful celebratory gatherings for Thanksgiving and Christmas that will likely not turn into super spreaders. Blessings, Dr. John. Here's another letter. Dear Dr. Robinson, our family has grown and moved far away.

We don't have the inclination nor income to travel there for the holidays. This will be the first holiday season where we have stayed. home, just the two of us. As such, I'm not up for all the fuss and glitter of a holiday season. How can I get into it when I don't see anything to get into? Signed, Debbie Downer. Dear D.D., it seems that the only thing constant in all of our lives is change. While we all get used to the familiar, that makes it hard to accept change when it comes our way. I hear you. Several things come to mind. Instead of looking at your circumstances as just us, too, consider it an opportunity to create something new and special for the two of you.

Decorate your house in creative ways. Create a special meal just for the two of you, or mic drop, go out for your holiday meal. Stay active in ways that you can now that the kids and grandkids are not there. Maybe consider helping out with the church program, a soup kitchen, a homeless shelter. Certainly call your family, zoom them, and share the holidays long distance, but find other activities to focus on as well. You may be fighting off the holiday blues. Two cures for depression are these. Number one, it's hard to be depressed when you're active.

Therefore, fill your time. Number two, when you don't feel like doing something that you know in your heart will be good for you, act as if you feel like doing it, and then get it done. This as-if principle works wonders. Here's to new beginnings and wonderful ways to share the holidays with each other. Blessings, Dr. John. If these letters stir questions of your own, contact me. me through my website at www. Thereformykidst.com or email me at John Robinson 0.0.0.com.

I'm Dr. Jonathan C. Robinson, licensed clinical psychologist and Christian author of Teachable Moments Building Blocks of Christian Parenting. And this has been Teachable Moments. Teachable Moments Building Blocks of Christian Parenting is available online at Amazonbooks.com and in local and national bookstores. More on Dr. Robinson at TMC. p-in-c.com