Being there for your kids - Life-Enhancing Physical Touch

Episode Date: September 8, 2019

     It's true. Babies in particular, but also children, teens, and grown-ups all cherish soft, gentle, loving physical touch. Touch is our nonverbal way of affirming the relationship we have with our children. I call it snuggle time. Especially in transition with babies up to pre-schoolers, such as around bedtime, snuggle time eases the transition and calms your child so they can gently fall asleep. Snuggle time is a universal bonding experience. Celebrate your child's victories and console him in his losses. It's what family does where others may not. Snuggle time is a teachable moment where your message to your child is a version of, You can do this. You got this. I've got your back. Yaay, snuggle time.

Hi, I'm Dr. John Robinson, and this is Teachable Moments. Let me be enthusiastic here for just a moment and say, Yay, snuggle time. Whether we admit it or not, we are all touchy-feely people. Whether it's a macho, subtle nod between men, holding hands at the table for grace before supper, or tucking your preschooler into bed at night, we all enjoy and benefit from snuggle time. From neurochemistry, we know that oxytocin is a brain chemical that is released with human touch. It's an agent of calming and coping. Whether just a moment or more, it helps us navigate life and promotes healthy relationships. At age 10, Johnny and his mom were waiting for the light to change in their small hometown.

When it turned green, his mom instinctively reached for Johnny's hand as they moved into the crosswalk. For the first time, Johnny pulled his hand away and protested, Mom, please, I'm 10 years old. Mom relented and they crossed silently. Was Mom being overprotective? Does she cross boundaries? Johnny felt embarrassed by her touch at that moment. However, when he later struck out during his Little League baseball game,

he was glad for her comforting hug and words of encouragement. Johnny and his mom were struggling with attachment issues. Attachment and the emotional bonding that comes from it starts immediately after birth of your child. When mom gazes into her newborn's eyes and lets us, him curl his little fist around her finger, she is stimulating the empathy and verbal centers of his brain and teaching him how to interact with others. As your child learns, grows, and develops, have lots of face-to-face time with him. Make time to snuggle. Be playful and gently touch his cheek, shoulder or hand. Allow yourself to share your own feelings, modeling for him the

emotional vulnerability that will serve him so well in his adult relationships later on. These are fantastic teachable moments that will last him a lifetime. Yay, snuggle time. I'm Dr. John Robinson, licensed clinical psychologist and Christian author of Teachable Moments Building Blocks of Christian Parenting. And this has been Teachable Moments. Teachable Moments, Building Blocks of Christian Parenting is available online at AmazonBooks.com and in local and national bookstores. More on Dr. Robinson at TMP-I-NC.com.