Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Nicole's Fruit Journey

Episode Date: October 22, 2025

Nicole and Sasheer are back from a quick trip to Vegas and ready to break down all of their funniest moments, from seeing Ashlee Simpson to their beloved Cirque Du Soleil. Nicole and Sasheer also recount their very different mornings - one involves the fire department (spoiler: everything's fine!) and the other involves stealing fruit. Tune in to find out what happened to who and why and how!Watch this full video on YouTube and follow below!Follow Nicole: Twitter, Instagram, TikTokFollow Sasheer: Instagram, TikTokLike the show? Rate Best Friends 5 stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts!Have a friendship question for Nicole and Sasheer to solve? Leave us a voicemail at [phone]‬ or write in at [e-mail] Friends is a production of Headgum Studios. Our producer is Allie Kahan. Our executive producer is Anya Kanevskaya. The show is edited, mixed, and engineered by Richelle Chen.This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Best Friends via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. I was looking ahead on my calendar, and I realized that the holidays aren't as far away as a thought. That's, that time always gets so busy. So I'm going to get ahead of the game and shopper looks that'll take me from now into the holiday season. Lucky for me, Macy's big fall sale is happening now with 40 to 60% off fall essentials. They'll take us from now to then. Anne Klein and DKMI have some adorable dress. dresses I've been eyeing. So it's the time to buy. Macy's also has tons of luxurious cashmere

in so many colors, which honestly, I think I might just start wearing now. I might also pick up a new Calvin Klein suit from a friend as a gift. There are so many holiday parties coming up and we'll want to show off. Macy's big fall sale is happening now through October 26th. Shop at Macy's.com or in store. Hi, Sashir. Hi, Nicole. I've been stealing. What have you been stealing?

I've been stealing Japanese persimmons from my neighbor. My goodness. Did you already know you like persimmons? I had no idea what this fruit was. But you just took it to sight on seeds. I reached my little hand up and I ripped it out of the tree. This is disgusting. I didn't wash it because I was like,

I got to know what this tastes like. I can't wait until I get home. And I bit into it and I was like, this is a fruit I've never had before. And you like it? Yes. So then I went back, took some more, took a picture, Google imaged it, and it's a Japanese persimmon. Wow.

So then I went back last night. In the dead of night. In the dead of night on my walk with Clyde and reached over, because I have to go over the fence a little bit to get them. And I have no shame. They were getting their car wash. So there was someone there who probably saw. me do this during the day. And then at night, I went back, reached over, grabbed four more.

Wow. And here's what I'm, I bought a pot on Amazon.com. I'm going to stick one of them in dirt. And I'm going to have Japanese persimmons. Oh, are you going to take the seeds from the persimmons that you picked? Nice. Okay. I'm really excited about this. I'm excited too. And then you're going to pick them from your neighbor. I don't. I can have them for myself. Yeah. Honestly, like, I have an orange bush and a fig tree in my yard and I don't pick them so you're probably doing that neighbor a favor they're probably like I'll get to it later like I'll hire somebody to get to it and they just won't and then the fruit will go bad and here I am picking them eating them had one this morning that's nice I'm having a nice time with this I'm so glad and then I was so

inspired I bought more seeds I'm gonna tell you what seeds I bought okay I've just been on fruit journey because I was eating these K grapes. They're gigantic fucking grapes and they're so good. Are you saying K, like the letter K? Yeah, they're from Korea. Like K-pop? K-grapes. Got it. Okay. Hold on. Let's find it. Where is my... Huh? Do you like order it online? I ordered it from neraseeds.com. I got ruby seedless grape fruit seeds for planting. Pink gullas. Flathara fruit seeds for planting. I don't know what that is, but I like the picture.

And then I got Japanese strawberry fruit seeds for planting. Red custard apple? What is that? I have no idea. I don't know, but I'll know in six to nine months. Then I got blue Java banana. It's an ice cream banana. Oh, my goodness.

I don't know. Wait, is that going to be a tree? I don't know. Do you want to see, like, what these seeds will turn into? No, I'm not going to do any research. I'm going to put them in the pots and I'm going to water them and we're going to see what fucking happens

then I got green purple watermelon fruit and then I got another strawberry and then I got purple strawberries look at the color of that whoa that actually seems unbelievable right? They're so purple wow

and did you check to see if this climate is good for those things? No no I didn't do a single sort of research and it started because I found this website called MiamiFruit.com and I wanted to get a gross Michelle banana because apparently that's the variety of banana that we were all eating before and it tastes like candy

and that's what the banana runts are based on. Have we talked about this? I think so, yes. Well, they don't ship to California. But then I found these seeds, man. These seeds shipped to California. And I'm gonna plant them seeds. Now I'm a half

All the strawberries Purple Watermelons I'm so excited I'm excited for you Oh my God Imagine me with a banana tree I can't But I soon will

Who is she Japanese persimmins Bananas that you can't buy Gelson's or Albertsons I'm gonna start a fucking fruit stand I can't wait Yeah So that's what I've been doing stealing That's cool. Nice. The fire department came to my house this morning because...

Are you okay? I'm okay. Yeah. I... So there was something in my house started making a crazy noise. It was like a loud hum and it was coming from a box that I don't know what it is. It was just like a box on the ceiling and I was like, don't know that. And then I texted my uncle because he does like construction house stuff. And I was like, do you have any idea what this noise is? And he was like, I think it's a carbon monoxide detector. And maybe there's a leak. And so you should call the fire department. Oh, no. So I did. And they came and, like, five men just walked to my house. And I was like, it's that. And then one guy just jumped on the counter, took it off.

And he was like, I think it's a speaker. And then they, like, feel it with it. And he's like, maybe it's the doorbell speaker. And they're like, oh, it's the doorbell speaker. And then they look so disappointed because they really wanted to do something. They were like ready for action. And one guy, like, they were in like a line. And it was like one guy was on the counter, one guy was like underneath, and then two more guys.

And the guy closest to me was like, and then where's the noise coming from? And what is that over there? Do you think it's going for this door? And I was like, I don't know. But they were like so ready to help. I loved it. I love that. They were ready to save you.

And I was like, so do I call an electrician? And they're like, I guess so. All right. Bye. And they just like filed out of the house. You didn't take a picture? I should have taken a picture. But I was, like, so concerned and it was like a lot happening.

That's wild. I once had the alarm go off in my house when I wasn't home, and then the police came, and since there was no breaking and entering, something was wrong with the alarm, they just left a note, if this happens again, we find you this much money. And I was like, that's not nice. No. It's not your fault. No, it was not my fault. So police bad, firefighters, good. Firefighter's very good.

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Oh, boy. What an exciting morning. It was a pretty exciting morning. What time did this happen? At like, maybe 9 a.m.? 10 a.m.?

Whoa. It's the morning. Whoa, that's wild. What a way to wake up. That's Folgers in your cup. Is that the theme song to Folgers? What a Way to Wake Up? I don't think it's what a way to wake up.

There's firefighters in your house. I don't think that's part of the song either. Folgers makes a great cup. What is it? The best part of waking up is Folgers. Your biders in your house. That's not a bad way to wake up. Running of them hot.

They were all attractive, yeah. Ugh. I wouldn't say, like, if I saw them, you know, outside of their uniforms, maybe I'd be like, all right. But, you know, because they got the... The uniforms sometimes fucking does it. Yes. I was at the sizzler, and there was a fire truck parked outside,

and then we went into the sizzler, and the firefighters were in there fucking loaded. up on the salad bar in the meats. I don't know if they had ice cream, but they looked so good in their little fire department shirts. I was like, oh, my God. And I was strudding past them. I'm a taken woman, but I was strutting.

Yeah. Because I was like, you know, best case scenario, one of them hits on me. And I go, sorry, sir, I'm taken, but I haven't been taken for a ride on a fire truck. And then we like, we go, woo, woo. around the sizzler, and then they, like, get on the ladder and I, like, dance a little. That is the best case scenario. That would be a great scenario if that happened. Oh, God, I want it so bad.

I mean, maybe it'll happen. Maybe. I believe. I'm still waiting to ride a garbage truck, which I also think is possible. Last time I saw one, I had Clyde with me and... Be a whole thing. Yeah. I need to get out there alone and get it done.

Go for my ride. Get what you want. Get what I want. out of life. We just went to Vegas and it was so fun. It was so fun. Oh my God. Just for one day.

For one day. One night only. One night only. One night. We were the real dream girls. We were. I think we went for less than 24 hours. I do think that's true.

The goal was to go see Ashley Simpson, which we did. Yes. So fun. And then the show started at 10 p.m. So I was like, well, we've got to do something beforehand. Can't just do one thing in Vegas. Late show. It's a late show.

And I said, you know your crowd. We're all the same age. Yeah. Got to get to bed. We're tired. What do we do? So it's like, we got to be out already doing something. And we saw Cirque de Soleil.

Yes. Which we love. Love Cirque de Soleil. Do you understand the storylines? Not really. No. Do we understand the through line? No.

But I do understand athleticism. Oh, man. Yeah, we saw Misterre. And it was like probably one of the more circusy circus shows I've seen it was great and they were doing

like strong people stuff there were two Ariana Grandes like standing on each other and like they didn't they looked strong

but I was like they're doing like stuff with their calves yes this bitch was lifting the other one up with just her feet I couldn't believe

and then one lady tucked her ponytail and I said who that's all you need to do she's like getting down the business getting down

it was wild and then there was a grown man who was pretending to be a baby And I was like, well, if this doesn't work out, I'm auditioning for mystery. There you go. Mysterie? Mistair.

Or mystery? Maybe mystery. I don't know. But I really, I had such a nice, lovely time watching it. And it really, again, emboldened me to, like, train to be a Cirque de Soleil performer. Also, it really, okay, watching the show, it really reminded me of the movie Showgirls, which you have seen but fell asleep during. This is true. Which is fine.

We were all hanging out, having a lovely time, drinking, whatever. But to me, it was so funny that when the movie came out at that time, people were like, this is outlandish, it's so over the top, this, that, and the other. And I was like, actually, it's not. If I was in a Cirque de Soleil show every night of the week, a show I simply didn't understand, I'd act a little crazy too. Wait, what happens to the show girls? Are they like, they're in, so Jesse Spano plays a girl who ends up in Vegas in a wild way.

She gets like Rob. She meets a lovely black lady who becomes her best friend slash savior. And she's a costumer on this like big, nasty titties out Vegas show. And she's a dancer and she's one of the best dancers because she's got it. And she was a stripper, but then she transitions and auditions for this Vegas show. There's a little light sexism. sexual aggression, not great. And then she gets in the show

and then the girls are like sabotaging each other and then she usurps, spoiler, the lead of the show to become the lead. But yeah, everyone acts at like this heightened state and this show is their everything. It's their end-all be-all. And I'm like, yeah, if I dedicate it my body to this art, it is my end-all be-all.

So that's my argument for show girls. Very realistic. Love show girls. And then after Ashley We went to a strip club The Speriment Rhino Oh, what a nice time It was very fun

But Ashley She was great Ashley was so great She was so good She looks great She sounded great Her voice was so good Yeah

And I love the way she dances Yeah It's just like arms out Feeling herself Yeah And then she was like Also so close Like everyone

We were so close to her I couldn't believe how close we were to the stage. I know. And like the little runway that she like walks on. And then she was going into the crowd. And I was like, she's not concerned? Someone could snatch her up.

I know, snatch her right up. But then I was like, wow, she's curated a trusting fan base. It's true. Where she can come into the crowd. And we'll all get real happy and excited. But nobody's touching. Yeah. Nobody's pulling.

Nobody's grabbing. I was worried about that one girl in the pink dress who kept waving at her. She'd be like, Ashley. Like Ashley's busy She was very funny She was in the smallest little pink dress I ever did see She was shit-faced

She was so drunk And Ashley was saying something like I don't know It was like emotional And she like said it to her And she just went hi I was like oh no You missed a moment of connection with this person

You're so excited to see Because you're so gone She was gone Oh, I The end was my favorite We sang pieces of me several times Acapella with the music She had three guitarist

Bases. Maybe one basses two guitarists They were fun They were very fun Oh my God It was just a lovely time Evan Ross was there Yes, her husband They were very sweet

Diana Ross was not there sadly But Mama Simpson was Mama Simpson was Her mother was And I said before the show She had the opportunity to do the funniest thing possible, which was just play Ashley's, or Jessica Simpson's music as the pre-show

music. And then start with Shadow. Mm-hmm. Let us, let us design a concert. Give us a show. Give us a show. We laughed really hard because we saw a cut out of the Cheeto mascot. What's his name again? Chester the Cheetah. And you pointed out and said,

Cheeto the Cheeto! I was just like, for the brand Cheetos, but Cheetah isn't somehow in the name, in his name. I thought his name was Chester A. Cheeto. And it makes sense that he's Chester a Cheetah, because he's a cheetah. Also, the view from our room was unhinged. It was just the sphere. Just the view of the sphere. It just looks so unworldly. Like, it doesn't look like it's of this earth. It looks sick. It just looks sick. It's so big. So big. I do want to see something in there, but I am just like, what is, what is this?

Yeah, what is it? What is this big ball? Yeah. It's so strange that someone was like, what if there was a ball that people went inside? And there's screens on the outside and the inside. Yes. Yeah. Isn't that wild?

It's wild. Mm-hmm. Well, we want to see Backstreet Boys there, but we don't know when they're performing. Oh, yeah, because they're kept being ads like different places where we were in Vegas. And then we were like, oh, the Backstreet Boys. And we look at it to see them. the date and then it would change. You're like, oh, no, I guess we'll never know. I still haven't looked it up. No, you did look it up on the way. Oh, I did. They're there.

January? I think December through February. Great. So I guess they sold out that first run. Yeah. So we're back, back, back again. Back streets. Back all right. I'm excited. Yeah. We also watched a Japanese cartoon. Mm-hmm. And a Pan man. That sounds right. I really liked it Yeah, me too Oh my God It's interesting what you can learn From a children's cartoon

I couldn't believe it Those children were singing A song about like Who Who am I What is my purpose Am I contributing What do I contribute for the society

It was so funny I was like whoa And then there was a character dolly Who was like I made a wish That when I became a real doll I would do everything I wanted to do And then there was a montage of her doing everything she wanted to do.

And everyone was so annoyed with her. And I was like, I'm Dolly. I'm, I'm, I'm Dolly. I'm constantly just like, nah, ma, gha. And people are like, oh, my God. When will this end? No, I don't think it, I don't think it's constantly like, oh, my God, when will this end? But, yeah, I think there was a, I guess the lesson of the cartoon was like, Dolly need to think by other people sometimes.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I took that lesson in my heart because I got to start thinking about other people sometimes. That's nice. Yeah. Yeah. A real existential crisis watching this cartoon. It also was 40 minutes, I think.

Yeah, but it felt forever. It felt like a two-hour epic story. So many things happened in it. So many. And then it was kind of tough because I don't know if it was the first episode, but they didn't really explain things. I thought a pan and a man was a cookie. but he's curry bread And then there's

And he's a superhero And then there's actual curry That's also a superhero And then there's just toast That's a superhero And then there's a man who's baking them all Named like Uncle Jack Or something

Yeah And the reason why we watched it is This year you were like Huh That's the man who's on all the apple juice in Japan And I was like Well we got to figure out Why he's on the apple juice

And we haven't figured it out I think because they're just popular Yeah Yeah, but he's curry. Yeah, that part I don't understand. Right? But yeah, I did have an apple juice box while I was in Japan. And I was like, who are these fun people?

And I saw them everywhere. They're like on billboards. They're on like signs and stuff. And I was like, who are these people? Well, according to Wikipedia, they have usurped Hello Kitty as the most popular cartoon in Japan. Wild. Mm-hmm.

I believe it. I believe it, too. They really were. I did see this curry man way more than Hello Kitty. I can't wait to go to Japan and see it Yeah You're gonna like it I can't wait to go

I know him I know the whole story I know the gang I know these people Yeah Mm-hmm Yeah I think I'm gonna watch

More episodes Yeah I might too What else did we watch Was that it You were taking a nap And I watched Shira The cartoon

Oh yes yes And you thought one of the voices Was mine Yes I woke up out of my slumber And I was like You don't think That sounds like you And you were like

Who? I was like, wait, her. I had like rewound it a bunch and I was like, I guess it could sound like me and you're like, mm-hmm. You're like rolled back over and went to sleep. I think that was you. I heard it out of my dreams. Yeah. I can see it. Thank you. And then you gambled. I did not. I stood beside you and watched you lose money. And then I stepped away from you and you won money. You kept going, oh, that's it. All your money is gone.

that was fast and I was like mm-hmm yep that's fast sit at another machine you'd be like is it all is it all done again you lost your money again and I was like yeah and then you bought merch at the show and I only I only ever really win money when I'm on my own and you went up to the room to put your shirt away and I was like I'm gonna go I'm gonna go play I'm gonna see I want to try to win back my $200 and I went back a little bit more than $200 and I was like Oh, was it me? Also, when I explained, because I got a hand pay, which means they take, you can opt to have taxes taken out, which I did, because I was like, there's no way I'm filing this. Yeah.

And then you put your hand out so the cameras see, so you can't dispute it later. And then they count out your money in your hand. And then sometimes people watch, and it's fun. That's fun. And I told you what happened. You went, huh, that was fast. I was like, good Lord, since here. Why don't you have another?

take on gambling you just kept saying wow that was fast I guess I don't know it was really funny I don't know my perception of like how long gambling takes but it all did feel very fast it's like well in that amount of time you got that much money that's crazy cool oh you lost that much money and that much time wow it's fast and then a drunk man kind of swayed past us as I was playing and he went you You better nail that machine. And they laughed at himself. And then left. And I was like, I don't know if he recognized me or was just having a nice time.

I really have no idea. And I'll never know. What happens in Vegas? Didn't stay in Vegas because I told everybody. You took it back to L.A. Told everybody. And then before we went to bed, you were like, looks like you want to play another slot. And I was like, yeah, the lights really, the dopamine gets you.

And I put in $20. And then I was like, ooh, free games. And then I think it was like $125 or something. And again, you went, wait, what? You won how much? And I was like, I won $100. And you went, that happened so fast. And I was like, we got to get her to bed.

We got to get her out of here. My God. I also, I don't know if it was that one or a different one, but you were like at one machine and like, I guess we lost money pretty quickly. And then you moved to the next one over. and instead of standing next to you, I stood behind you, and then you won $300.

Yeah, I think maybe it's the next-to-me thing. That's not great. Maybe I can't have anyone in my peripherals. Maybe. In the zone. And it's like, in the zone for what? It's just luck. Yeah.

But I just see a thing that said that like luck kind of has a science to it Because, like, if you, it kind of, I guess kind of essentially manifesting, like, if you believe this is a possibility, like you actually believe this thing could happen, the chances are better for it to happen. So it's like luck, but also you believing that it can happen enhances the possibility. I believe it because I was like, I have to play Wheel of Fortune. Yeah. I have to. And then we found, I think it was like a high roller.

Oh, no, it was one where you have to play with other people. and I was like, oh, I don't know how to, I don't know how to do that at all. And then when you went up to the room, I was like, where's Wheel of Fortune? And I don't know why I was like, Wheel of Fortune is going to give me money. Yeah. And then I did. And then I have gambling rules. I can only gamble in the hotel I'm staying at because I can only gamble at home.

Which doesn't make any sense. But it works. It works. I have only one in casinos where I'm staying. at it or that was a destination that we went to I don't because we were gambling oh because we were gambling on the other side of the hotel oh yes because we were at the Venetian yeah but staying in the Palazzo Palazio or I got it Palazzo and I lost money in the Venetian but I won in the Palazzo wild wild wild stuff yeah my own little rules work I mean yeah you're my rules

only gamble on silly branded machines uh-huh um it's got to have free games and it has to advertise free games and then have a wish and a pure heart clear eyes clear eyes open heart open road nice skin and the lady next me at wheel of fortune she she was really nice she was like oh I think you got a free spin and I was like I did and she was like and on five cents I think you're gonna hit it and I was like okay and then I like spun it she went oh I think you're gonna win some money. And then it started like digging. She's like, you did. And then hers dug. And I was like, you won money too. She was like, yeah, I won, I won, um, I won a hundred. And I was like, oh, congrats. She's like, I put in three. And I was like, that's, you know, you're only down

two. Yeah. Community. Community. Fellowship. That is nice. Someone DM'd me and they were like, what's going on with fellowship? Why are you saying this so much? Yeah, what is going on with Fellowship, there needs me more. That's, Sashir, that's truly what I'm saying. Fellowship, if you're asking, you need to be doing more of it. It's true. Go find a community. And fellowship with them.

Go fucking find a community. Oh, shit. I was going to say something new and I fucking can't remember. Oh. Was it about Vegas? Oh, I have a bone to pick with the Venetian. I simply didn't understand the light switches. Yeah, that was really.

hard. It was like it had one of those all lights, all of the lights master switches by the door. So then you could no longer use any of those switches in the place. I didn't find out to the morning we were leaving that you could turn

on all lights and then turn them all off individually, which is also kind of annoying. It's so annoying. I said, how dare you make me feel stupid in a room I'm paying for? We both. I didn't know you were doing this because I was asleep when you were going to bathroom and then And you were saying when I was going to the bathroom, but we were both taking our phones, putting the flashlight on to the bathroom to get light.

I was taking rude poos with my phone flashlight. And I was like, oh, man, it doesn't get any worse than this. This is bad. I was so mad about it. I took two rude poos with a flashlight. Oh, my God. Oh, what I was going to say is we haven't talked about Spago. I'm a Wolfgang puckhead.

I am a big fucking fan of Wolfgang Puck My God And Wolfgang Puck is in Gelson's And I was like, wow To be with the masses You have to be of excellence That's what they say Because you have to be so good at what you do

For then to have it diffused For people who maybe can't afford Spago That's true But I went to fancy dinner at Spago Yeah So sheer I have been searching for succulent, juicy chicken.

Oh, my goodness. Because, I don't know. Sometimes at a restaurant, your chicken be dry. This is true. And I recently got a rotisserie from Costco. No shade to Costco. I love Costco. $1.50 for a hot dog.

Thank you in this economy. That's a treat. But I did not like the rotisserie chicken. I find it to be a little dry. But this chicken at spa goes to sheer. I would write home about it. Wow. Do you know that phrase?

I do know the phrase. I would. That is something to write home about it. I would write multiple letters home. What would you say? Mama, I wish you were alive. So you could have this chicken. Papa, so sad, you're gone.

So quick. I wish you were alive too to have this chicken. Sister, you're still with us. Want to come visit us? We can have this chicken. That's what I went right. Okay, nice. And the mashed potatoes were so good.

You love mashed potatoes. I love mashed potatoes. That's great. And then that nice man who spends time with me got quail. It was nice. Quail meat? Quail meat. Whoa.

And it's like little chicken. It is. And the way they laid it on the plate was as if it passed away on the plate because they left his little bird legs there, which I thought was a little egregious. Yeah, because then you'd have to cut the legs off? Uh-huh. Hmm. I thought that was a little wild, Wolfgang.

It feels a bit wild, yes. But there was a bunch of stuff off menu that we got. little pizza with salmon on it. Ooh, Wolfgang, fucking showed out. You would love it. I would love it. You would really like it. It's good. Okay. Also off-menu, bread. Bread.

Off-menu bread? Mm-hmm. It was some of the best bread I've ever fucking had. Why was it so good? It had a handle on the end. I don't know how to explain it. So I guess when they bake the bread, they twist the ends. So the end piece has like a little thing. You put your tomatoes in it. It was good. And the butter.

The butter wolf gang, you did it again The butter was so good It sounds good And then I tasted that quail that was good And then a friend we were with What do he get? He got some sort of fish, maybe the Branzino Tasty as fuck

Wow And then there was a souffle So good And then there was cheesecake, so good And then there was something else that I said I think it's good But I didn't eat too much of it Because I was busy with my souffle

And then we went to cut by Wolfgang Puck. Yes, in Vegas. And you got your molten lava cake. You're always looking for one. I love a molten chocolate lava cake. As I think we've talked about it on this podcast, it was all the rage. It was all the rage and the late aughts. And then suddenly off the menu for whatever fucking reason, because it's still delicious.

Yeah, very. And it was good. They tried to serve it with Earl Grey tea ice cream. I said no. No. No offense, Wolfgang. I don't know more than you, but it should be vanilla. Yeah.

I'm not a chef. But it should be vanilla. Oh, actually, that's not a Wolfgang choice. That was the choice of their pastry chef. Oh, there you go. So Wolfgang. You're still good. No misses.

This bitch. No, I'm kidding. She was great. She was great. She was great. I really hope Wolfgang, like, hears me. talk his praises and, like, wants to hang out with me. I hope so.

I really would like Wolfgang to cook for me, which is crazy. Is that crazy? I bet that's a lot of people's fantasy. Definitely. But, I don't know, maybe Wolfgang will have a cooking show or something where he invites celebrities to eat his food. All right. Food Network, I almost just said food.com.

It's on you now. But, no, there's still a food network, right? I think so. Food Network, get on it. Get on it. Get on it. Get on it. been there.

Oh, wow. Well, I hope so. And now I'm like, should I make a list of celebrity chefs and go to all their restaurants? There's a reason why they're celebrities. Who else are celebrity chefs that have restaurants? I don't know.

Ellie, do you mind Googling? I don't know how many celebrity chefs. Well, Guy Fieri. That's true? He's got like... And you've been there? I have been to the Burbank Airport burger spot, but there's a I didn't realize there was a full restaurant

on the other side of the airport. Oh. And that's your mistake. That is my mistake. But I also think there's one at Times Square. But I'm never going to Times Square. That's true. Maybe before a show.

Oh. But if I'm going to eat in Times Square before a show, I'm going to go to Virgil's. Have you had Virgil's? I don't think so. Some of the best ribs you'll ever fucking have. Right in Times Square, can you believe? I can't.

They're so meaty and good. Oh. Sounds good. Okay, in L.A., right? Yes. Okay, a lot of these answers are top chef contestants. Oh, interesting. Have you either of you watched ever?

Nope. No. Okay. Let's see. Bobby Flee? That's a sloody chef? I know Bobby Flai. He's got a, does he have a restaurant?

Let's get Flayed. He should. Oh, you know what? Bobby Flaid does not currently have a restaurant in Los Angeles. Oh. I'm deleting Bobby Flae. Don't leave Bobby Flay. And it doesn't have to be Los Angeles.

We could travel. Yeah. We'll travel for food. We could do a road trip. Well, you know, Robert De Niro owns Nobu. I didn't know that. Robert De Niro? Yeah, that's what we did.

Of Scorsesee fame? Yeah. The taxi driver? The taxi driver himself? Little do we know. His side hustle after doing Scorsese films was rolling sushi. Um, Osteria Moza Owned by Nancy Silverton

You know Nancy? I don't know Nancy I've only been there Oh Nancy Yep, Nancy I guess I know more celebrity chefs than I thought That's so funny Okay And then Brooke Williamson

Is a celebrity chef Bobby Flaid's current girlfriend Has a four and one Eatery Four and one There's only three meals Breakfast, lunch, and dinner What's the four? dessert it's a yeah unique four concept casual dining spot four different dining experiences i don't know

what that means whoa choose your own adventure food that's fun imagine you get your plate and they're like pick it up you got to go to a different table for your next experience have you done that or seen the restaurant that where you eat in the dark uh i've heard of it it scares me why because You're in the dark, and what if they give me something I don't want to eat? Okay. Do I get to look at a menu in the light? Hmm. Oh, that's interesting.

Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if you, do you order ahead of time or? I don't know. They just serve you the same stuff. Right? Because if the server is like, we have chicken, we have fish, we have steak. And I'm like, okay, what is what's in it? Like, what's it marinated?

Like, are there going to be pickles? Mustard? Relish? Yeah, I guess I would. Yeah, interesting. Yeah, is the darkness really like to surprise you? Or is it just for your taste buds to take over and nothing else? I don't know.

I also can see myself missing my mouth in the dark. Spilling all over my... I spill all over myself when I can see. Interesting. Yeah, I guess... I'm looking at up and it's saying that it's like a prefix menu every night. So they don't look at it. Interesting.

I don't think I'd be interesting. to that? I think I would want to try it just to see. Is there one in LA, Allie? There is. Let's see. It's down, it looks like it's downtown. Okay. And it's called fever. Fever. Dining in the dark. Dining in the dark experience.com. And yeah, it's a nine course prefix menu. Right now they're doing a Peruvian culinary journey. And it's dark, but then you're also blindfolded. Wow, this is you're really not going to see anything. Wow.

It says, Gaspel enter a darkened room and place a blindfold over their eyes before indulging in a nine-course Peruvian tasting experience. It's a true foodie experience that promises to enhance your senses by eliminating one of them, your eyesight. I'm into it. You'll have to be. I'll do it.

I think I'll have a nice time. I think so. It's at least experience. Will someone lead me around or they're railings? Your table will be presented to you on arrival with the help of our staff. Their staff, you'll be taken to the seats. And seating plans are done five days prior to the event after they collect order forms. So I guess, okay, so I guess you might put in your options ahead of time.

Ah, okay. How much is it? Let's see. $10,000. No way. Lowest is 80. Mm-hmm. I bet.

That's affordable. Yeah, two menus that include meat are $64 each with a $16 booking fee. Okay. For an experience. Let's do it. Let's do it. Okay, pull out your calendar. Well, I'm just kidding.

I wouldn't make you schedule on camera. You know, they would love that. I believe we did do that one time. Probably. Like, what day are you available? When can we do this? Well, yeah, I would do that. I'm down to eat in different ways.

Why not? Yeah. I love food. Speaking of eyesight, I had a hard time in Vegas. Yes. Because my, I did have a doctor say that my corneas are weak. Honestly, there is a better way to phrase that. Nothing about you's weak.

Thank you so much. You are a strong, independent woman. Thank you. Pulled yourself up by your bootstraps. Yeah. You've been independent since you left home. Exactly. Thank you so much.

You're welcome. But they are having some trouble. I can see. But like my, when the light hits my eyes, it's very sensitive. Like a big pizza pie? Yes. That's some all right. Real quick.

Let's take a break. And then we're going to get into your eyes. Oh boy, I've had a bunch of headaches trying to make progress with my finances. I mean, sometimes overdraft fees really get you good. Miss payments, ugh, that sucks. And sometimes I'll be wishing that I saved more. Chime understands that every dollar counts. That's why when you set up direct deposit through Chime, you get access to fee-free,

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day. Maybe your someday starts now, because here's what Chamberlain wants you to know. You've got this and we've got you. Learn more at chamberlain.edu, Chamberlain University, belong to something greater. Certified to operate by Shev. All right, open wine. No, don't get in my eyes. I have got, I've been having issues. So I don't have weak corneas. I have a stigmatism.

Oh. So when I, so sometimes at night the lights really spread out in a way that I'm like, is this safe? So I have contacts that have, I don't know, they're foreign astigmatism. I don't know. They're like bulbous. I don't know. I don't know the science. I'm not.

an obstetrician? No, optometrist. That's what it is. And the older I've gotten, the more I find myself leaning back and squinting my eyes to see shit, I'm like, this is not the life I want. I know. Yeah. If I, I mean, there's been a few concerts that I go to recently where everyone has strobing lights and I'm like, I feel old because I'm like, don't they know? Don't they know this hurts? And I'll be like covering my face or, like, closing my eyes completely. But I have seen more people wearing sunglasses at concerts or, or dance clubs or whatever. And think, well, you had some sunglasses when we went to see Ashley Simpson because there was a stroby part.

And I was like, trying to vibe with my eyes closed. And you were like, here. I was like, thank God. We had talked about it for a while. And it just never occurred to me that I always have sunglasses in my travel purse. I'm so glad. And then I finally was like, oh, my God. And then it really, seeing you in my sunglasses almost disturbed me a little.

Oh, oh. I was like, I have a big head because my sunglasses, you looked like an alien. They were so big on you. That's why I kept, like, taking pictures of you. I was like, you look like a fucking freak. Wait, can you show me? I don't think you showed me what the pictures look like. I mean, it definitely felt big on my face.

It took up, like, half of my head. I was like. They're not that big on me. And it rocked me in a way that I was like, I have the biggest head in America? Well, I think, I don't know. They still look big on you, but they also like, they're huge on you. They look insane. Wait, that actually is crazy.

Yes. It's like from like almost the top of my forehead to my nose. And they don't look like that on me. That's really funny. it's really wild and then please hold okay it just looks i'm just a dancing bug yes you do look like a bug interesting yeah i have a big fucking head sorry about it it's okay finding hats that fit is is hard yeah um i have a big furry bucket hat that when i wear it i have to keep like pulling it down because it just like rises

because my head is, it doesn't hug my head because it's like, it's a little too small but I love that bucket hat. Hmm. Maybe a Taylor can like loosen up it in the back or something.

Luce it up my buttons, baby. As you can't say what you get in me and I'd say nothing I'll tell you listen up my buttons there. Uh-huh. I think that's the reason why I'm not a hat girl. Oh, also.

My head gets, so hot in a hat. Oh, I like a hat. Well, maybe now because I don't have any hair, so it keeps my head warm. I need the warmth. God, warmth reminds me of when I put in my calendar, sit in Sashir's seat for heat. Have we talked about that? No, we haven't. I, I constantly put things in my calendar, and I don't give myself clues or hints. And then things will happen, and I'm like, I don't know And then sometimes somebody will text me Like a couple days before the day of

And I'm like, that's what that is But nobody texted me about Sit in Sashir's seat for heat I can't even remember what it was I simply don't know And it was for some time in September Which is interesting because it's like Okay, summer ended

So I guess I have to get warm In Sashir's seat But I don't know It's like Memento But on your phone It is like Just a little clues What is this mean?

What is it? I got to figure it out And then I find out My wife's dead Right, that was the movie Was his wife dead? And he was tattooing himself To remember

To give her insulin? He was trying to figure out Like I think who the killer was But then it was like Not what it I can't remember Maybe he was the killer

Maybe that was it I don't remember I don't remember Who did We don't remember Was it? Was it? I think so

Chrissy Noles I think it was like one of his first things. Really? Wild. Slam. Slam! Right in the kisser. Slam!

He said, I make movies. He really does. I simply don't help myself out in any sort of way. And then sometimes that nice man in my life will look at my calendar and he's like, what is this? And I'm like, wouldn't you like to know? Your guess is as good as mine. What did I like to know? And he was like, why don't you just put more context clues?

Too easy. So I have started doing that. Nice. I had a Task Rabbit come over yesterday to move a heavy chair for me And he had to come back today with his brother to move a different heavy chair And I wrote in my calendar Chairman returns with brother to move chair again It's like a whole story

Once upon a time the chairman returned This time with his brother Well I'm testing out putting more information in my calendar But the word's so small when you types it out like that. Mm-hmm. It's really funny. Yeah. But, you know, I know exactly what's happening today.

Chairmen returns with Brother to Move Heavy Chair. Mm-hmm. I like that. Thank you. I'm really trying to help myself out. Yeah. Because sometimes it's stressful. Yeah.

When something's approaching and I don't know what it is. Mm-hmm. Mm-mm. Shaking my dang head. Shaking my dang head. And I don't, I've learned I don't ask for details. That is also true. And I don't give details.

We had to book a makeup artist for something, and you were like, do you want me to text or do you want to text? And I was like, hey, I'd love to see how you handle this. And you put so much information that I was like, in no world would I have let that person know any of this? I think, because I texted the makeup artist we know, Jen, and I was like, Jen, can you do our makeup? We just, we got to look like this. And she was like, got it. But I can't do it. And I was like, oh, okay.

But that's probably how I would have texted that person. and we didn't know. All familiar. Hey, man. Well, you texted our friend group something about, like, are you guys, oh, like, I can't remember what it was. Oh, you said the time. You're like, 7.30's still good, right?

And I was like, for our hangout on Monday. And I just added the rest of the details. It's tough. I guess I just think people are in my head. Yeah. Get out of my head, out of my head. Right? Isn't that that Ashley Simpson song?

Out of my, out of my head. Get out of my head. I'm going to run a musical mood today. You are. It's because I've been taking them singing lessons. It's true. It's just got a song in your heart. I have a song of my heart and a clear mind.

Can I tell you something? Please. I've been buying so many things on Sephora.com. Okay. So much skin care. Yeah. I've been having a good time. Nice.

So there's, it's called Glow recipe. I think I've talked about them before on this podcast. Everything is like fruit, fruit inspired. Okay. It's good stuff. Nice. Your skin looks great. Thank you.

But also, I have earned a lot of insider points. Oh. So you can pick free gifts. And I've been using, it's a Korean skincare brand that begins with an S. The bottles are cream and orangey. And it's pretty good. Nice. It's pretty good.

Are you, like, finding these brands? Are you researching them or are you just like stumbling upon them? You know the answer to that. That's true. I am stumbolina. Okay? I am stumbling on things. So I think I'm going to oscillate between this Korean brand that I found, glow recipe, and Crave, which I think is another Korean skincare brand.

Because if I stay with something too long, my skin starts to look dull. Oh, interesting. It's as if I'm like one of those, what are they called in the X-Men, that man, the scientists created them, the sentinels. I'm a sentinol, and my skin is adapting to the things I'm putting on it. Then it's fighting back. Wow. Okay. Was that a good analogy?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's good. It's so specific. Yeah, I bet no one's ever made that comparison. I probably not. Probably not. I'm pumped for the X-Men movie. When's it coming?

Oh, man. Yeah, same. Right? I'm so, like, I think they're writing it. I think so. I hope so. Yeah. Who do we talk to?

Kevin Figgi. Mr. Figgi. Oh, when's it coming? Yeah. I don't know. But they are like, it seems like they're, you know, introducing them or like getting them in there. Are they? Beast was at the end of

The Marbles. The Marbles. What was it called? The Marbles. The Marbles? With Captain Marvel, Miss Marvel, and Tiana Paris. Oh, yes. I watched that on a plane.

Yeah. Oh, I didn't get to the scene at the end. Oh, yeah. In the after credits, Beast shows up. Ah. Oh, that's nice. And is it Kelsey Grammer? I can't remember.

Nicholas Holt. It might have been Nicholas Holt. I can't remember. Okay. You know how many times I've seen Craven, right? I don't know the number, but I know you watched it a lot. I was asked yesterday, because I was watching it yesterday, I was asked how many times I watched it this month, and I was like,

oh, four times. And I have never looked to see if there's an end credit scene in it. Is there? No. Oh, okay. Sony rolled it out and said, we're not doing this any. That's the end of that. Which I say to Sony, what are you doing?

I don't understand why they don't lead into how campy these movies are. I'm having a great time. When we saw it in theaters, we had a great time. Your mom didn't. She was like, it was a movie. And I was like, but you didn't love it? You don't want to go back in the theater and see it again? She did not.

No, she had enough. Oh, boy. But that's, I just, I have hope and glimmer, and I see things other people don't. This is true. You do. Hey, thanks You find joy where there's none I really do

I can have a good time Truly anywhere Sad news Nicole Kidman and that man broke up Keith Urban Was that his name? I thought it was Toby

Toby Keith That is that a person That is a country singer It's a different one though Well at least I got Keith right Yes I'm sad Yeah

Yeah it did seem like That was like You know That was gonna make it to the end Mm-hmm. But, no. And they're both Australian? I think that's...

Is that right? No. Keith is American. I don't know why I thought he was also Australian. I guess I don't know if I've ever heard him talk. No, I've just seen his flat-ironed hair and said, I love that he's still new and that. I love a person dedicated to a look.

Chris Angel? Dedicated. Love it. Love it. Yeah. And that's the only other person I can think of. Mm-hmm. Oh, I'm wrong.

He was born in New Zealand. He's New Zealand? He does have a new New Zealand. I thought he didn't. Oh my gosh. Okay, I'm corrected. Okay. Wow.

And then he came over here and became a country singer? That's interesting. That's interesting. I feel like country's very like... American. Yeah. But that's cool. Good for him.

Yeah, good for him. He was accepted to the country commune. And there's black Americans that do country and they're not even accepted. That is wild They were like Anything but black people And that's Ain't that a shame

Ain't that a shame Ain't that a shame I wonder what his country songs are I've never heard a Keith Urban song I don't know if I have either I'm not a big country head Yeah

But I do like soulful country Yeah We liked Yola's country Yeah walk the fire It's great Or walk through the fire? Yeah, walk through the fire. So good.

Top to bottom. Mm-hmm. What an incredible. What an incredible vocalist. Incredible. What an incredible, incredible, incredible vocalist. Mm-hmm. What's a Keith Urban song?

What's his hit? Love, Pain, and the whole crazy thing was one of his hit albums. And I think, okay, it's saying that somebody like you, which came out in 2002, is one of his country essentials. That was a Dell song. Stupid boy. Stupid boy. Who's that? Gwen Stefani?

That's pink. Oh, that's pink. Sounds like he's doing covers. Yeah. Are they his songs? Wasted time, days go by, somewhere in my car. Somewhere in my car.

Where did I put my keys? I know there's somewhere in my car. Hey, I can be a fucking country singer. Well, that's fun. I've never heard of any of them. Should we answer queries? Yeah. Okay. This one is from Natalie. And it, she says, Hi, best friends. You all used to take listener questions about whether something they do is weird or not. And I really need to know about this one. I was brushing my teeth last night and realized that about 75% of the time I do it regular, i.e. move the toothbrush around in my chomper's. but around 25% of the time

I keep the toothbrush in place and move my mouth around it and I don't mean that I do it regular three times and then maybe weird one time I mean that every time I brush my teeth I do a combo of moving the toothbrush and then moving my whole head. I'm pretty sure this is weird so I'm mostly asking

if anyone else does this, Bueller. Thank you so much and I'm so glad my best friends are back. I don't think it's weird because I think any way you brush your teeth, you're getting it done. That's nice. That being said, people have said it's weird that I do this with the spinning head. Because you're like, you don't have to do that. I do think you're supposed to move it a little bit.

I think you're supposed to just move it because the brush is doing the work. Oh, what do I do? I guess I'll have to go home and really pay attention to myself. I guess, yeah, maybe I'm just holding it. I don't know. But I also feel like I'm moving it too, but maybe I'm not. And then, but this person is asking about moving their head with the brush still. And I don't think I've done that before.

I have, you know, spice it up, have a nice time. Have a new option, you know, make myself giggle a little bit. Yeah. But I will, I think it hurts, I think it would get to, it would be just a little too much on me. But I don't think that's weird. I think it's a fun quirk. Yeah. Yeah, I agree with you.

Whatever gets the goal, as long as the teeth are clean, you're doing it right. Yeah, it's like someone asking a question that's like, I do this, like, dance every time I soap up my whole body. I'm like, do the dance. Soap up the body. Yeah. Do it. Get the thing done. One time I was out of Friends place and I was brushing my teeth and I brushed my tongue.

Like, I guess I didn't think it was aggressively, but I just like brushed it. And they were like, wow, I've never seen that side of you before. Was this me? No. But I was like, how did other people brush their tongue? I go, mm-hmm. Yeah, that's what I do. And then I have a tongue scraper.

Same. Maybe, I don't know. I don't know. I didn't ask, like, can you show me how you brush your tongue? How do you brush your tongue? I would have asked. I would have been like, I gotta see this. I guess it'd be the difference.

Yeah, I don't know. Like, are you gentle or something? Yeah, they're just like lightly brushing the brush. No, yeah, you got to get in. there you never really stick your tongue out do you want me to like that or like i don't know what i was expecting but i feel like i'm always like that's true your tongue's always locked up i guess i do keep it in there yeah yeah It feels weird actually

It feels actually like Unnatural for me to do that Your tongue is locked up I keep it in there You're not I feel I feel like maybe you're like Like proud to show how small your tongue is

So it's always out It really is always out But it is just so small that Sometimes it just Sticks out Sometimes To be honest Sometimes I'll stick out my tongue

Just to like clear my mouth a little bit Because my tongue is so small that sometimes it impedes me speaking. Oh, interesting. Yeah, I don't... It's like a lizard when you do that. It's like when you shake an etch-a-sketch-sketch. Clears me up.

That's really funny. They're actually... I don't know. I can't remember if I talked about it on the show or with you. But there's like an eye and tongue exercise is supposed to like help your brain or like kind of like a brain puzzle. So it's like kind of like...

Kind of like the same thing is like rubbing your tummy and patting your head. It's like, I'm like that you're already following me. So this one is like move your eyes up and your tongue down. And then your eyes to the right and your tongue to the left. And then your eyes like that. So it's like, but this is also your tongue out of your mouth. So it'll be like, ah. Humilating for me.

I did that more. Ah, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. I feel crazy. Right? But it's supposed to like, I don't know, it works your tongue muscles and your eye muscles and your brain muscles. And I'm never working out the brain muscles. That's not true. Hey, thanks.

Should we do one more? One more. One more. Okay, this is from, this is called Making New Friends from Nell. My name is Nell. I'm 21 and I'm from a tiny, tiny town in rural, rural Ireland. I love the podcast and all you guys so much. The pod feels like I'm listening to my friends catch up and just chat shit, which is great.

I emailed in to see if you guys have any tips or ideas for making new friends who are also people of color. I myself a mixed race Irish and Caribbean and grew up in a large family, but because of being in a tiny town in Ireland, we were the only brown family growing up and to this day we still kind of get stared down walking around town. I don't have any friends of color and I just feel like I'm missing out, you know? I talked to my white friends about this and things like my hair or food or just cultural stuff and they don't seem to get it if that makes sense. I lived in a big city for college for a few years, and cities just aren't for me, but I don't know if I'll have to make that change just to meet more people like me. Sorry if this was a bit long. I love you guys. And every week, it's an absolute highlight.

And I can't wait to hear if you guys have any tips for finding and making more friends like myself. Lots of love now. I like that we have listeners in Ireland. Me too. Arta-Tartit-Tee. It's Irish life for me. Oh. Is that a pirate's life for me?

I it was a song in my heart nice but I think you're right interesting I mean my first question is just because I have not I don't know this rural town but I'm like are there even other people of color in this area which you know like it's unfortunate to have to move to a place

to meet people but also like if that That's the goal. Mm-hmm. It is okay to move to a place to find people like you. Yes. Here's my first thought. If you're trying to find local people in person, have a, like, if it's like taking care of your natural hair, maybe you post signs around town being like natural hair care meet up and see who comes. And maybe people of color will come if they're there because they're like, oh, natural hair, I would like to meet another, you know, brown person here and I are in Ireland.

And then, if you don't want to do that, if that's too vulnerable, I think Facebook might be a good option to, like, join a group that's an interest that our friend has, that might be black girls specific. Like, my aunt is in a group called Black Girls Run, and it's a bunch of black women who run. So it's like find an interest and then put, like, brown girls or black girls, and hopefully you'll find black girls. and hopefully you'll find black women or black people who have the same interests as you. I think that's smart, yeah, because maybe there are other people in your area or like at least near enough that have the same question of like, yeah, I also want to find more people of color. And so, yeah, hopefully there's either a group already created or you can create a group that's like, Sisters of Ireland. I like to talk to you That's sister's island up for me

Yeah I think I think it's just going to be putting yourself out there Which kind of sucks Yeah But won't it be nice if you do find Maybe like one or two people that like share your experience And maybe you find that they're like local to you And you can have like a little meetup once a month or something

Yeah And maybe ask your family Because if your family's also there Maybe they know other people in the area that are Caribbean or black and yeah maybe your mom's hiding blacks from you yeah she hasn't told you about some yet I didn't know you wanted to want to hang out with more black people so well if you have a question or a query we have an email address it's Nicole and sashire at gmail.com you also have a phone number that one I don't have memorized

Okay, the number is 323-23-2-8-6-554. Perfect. Hell, hell, yeah. I forgot you were miced, and I was like, how are you going to remember that? Yes, Allie's miced, and it's fine. I was like, for a hot second,

I was like, will she do it? And then when it didn't happen, I was like, oh, it's because Allie's miced. No need. She took care of it. Sometimes you just have to sit for a second. Goodbye. Goodbye.

That was a Hidgum podcast. What's up, everybody? I'm Kyle Mooney. And what's up, everybody? I'm Beck Ben. And, man, ooh, we got something to tell you. Oh, yeah, we definitely do. Yes, it's a brand new podcast on HeadGum.

That's right. And it's called What's Our Podcast? Yep. And that's because we don't have. a single idea what our podcast she'd be about. Yeah, we don't. So we actually have guests come on and they tell us what they think our podcast should be about and then we try it. Yep.

Guests like Mark Maren, Jack Black, Brittany Broski, Caper Lan, Bobby Moynihan, Mike Stalter and Tim Balls, Landon Axler, Joey, Joni McGreeze, and Dender. And Dender. New episodes release every Wednesday. So subscribe to what's our podcast. On YouTube or any of your favorite podcast platforms. Yeah.

I'm going to go do it right now.