Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Sasheer Learns That Nicole Loves Nuts

Episode Date: January 24, 2024

Hola amigas! Sasheer and Nicole continue to tell us about their adventures in Africa. Sasheer recounts how in South Africa they met people who knew how to speak eleven different languages. Nicole said when she was in Paris people didn’t want her to speak French. Sasheer learned that she doesn’t enjoy sitting with random strangers but it happened all the time in South Africa. Nicole shares how a driver warned them not to trust anyone in South Africa, plus he wouldn’t stop talking. Sasheer learns that Nicole loves nuts… zoo nuts to be exact. Nicole saw a monkey shit in a pool. Sasheer could push herself to get in the pool even though they cleaned it. Nicole is craving Burger King and has pipe dreams of opening a franchise. Plus, they help answer a friendship question about a foreign exchange friendship gone bad and how to make work friends with the opposite sex. This was recorded on Jan. 13th, 2024  Here is the quiz we took:https://www.buzzfeed.com/hazelyxlee/mexican-food-introvert-extrovert-quiz Email or call Nicole & Sasheer with your friendship questions at:[e-mail] Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link https://siriusxm.com/friends and code FRIENDS.

I also want to learn French because I watched a French show on the Mucho, mucho bien, si. I also want to learn French because I watched a French show on the airplane. Yeah. And I learned cloche, which means bell. What is it? Bell. Cloche. Bell.

That's all I learned. Cloche means bell in French. I don't need you to say bell anymore. It's the French word that I had the issue with. Cloche. Bonjour. In what context were they saying bell? I think they were just like, oh, they rang the bell.

And I was like, oh, they rang the cloche. Like, for class? In what context? I don't remember. Why were they ringing a bell? I don't know. Why am I being hassled? I don't know. I just want to know why they're using a bell.

I don't know. And I also don't know why that's the only word i remember all right uh let's see bonjour uh comment allez-vous that means how are you okay uh One, two, three. Zero. Zero. Nice. Thank you. And then, okay, so as I was watching this show, I was like, you know how people are like, oh, before I moved to the States,

I learned how to speak English watching Friends or whatever. And I was like, but how? Were the subtitles on? Or did they like have to decipher what was happening? I also don't know how that happens. When we were in South Africa, we were talking to people who were like, I know 11 languages. And we'd be like, how did that happen? And they're like, oh, you know, because people from different countries go to your school. And you just try to like piece together things.

And you learn each other's language. And I'm like, I absolutely went to school with people who spoke different languages and i did not learn their language from talking to them me either i think it's because they kept it at home and they didn't bring it to school you keep that in your own house and i'm like come on come on, bring it home. Bring it from home. Bring it in. Bring it in. There was a video of that girl who went to Lion in France and was like upset because she was like, it's not friendly here. No one is like trying to help me. Whenever I speak French, people are mad at me and don't want me to continue speaking French. I've made no friends.

I think she was there for like a week or two. And she was like, I'm having a horrible time. Which people were like, oh, girl, like, don't go to France for that. If you're trying to make friends abroad, don't go to France. And she didn't even go to Paris. She went to Lyon. That's not even like a touristy place uh yeah when i was in paris for a day uh people they were pretty angry when i tried to speak french to them they're like stop it just speak english and i was like but bonjour

come on tally but they were like common t calm and tally. No, shut up. Oh, when we were in South Africa, we were in Johannesburg. Our driver, so she fell asleep. She left me alone with this man. But this man said to us, he said, don't trust anyone in South Africa because you're going to go to a restaurant with all of your luggage and you're going to meet people who also have luggage but their luggage is going to be empty and they're going to take you to get drinks you're going to have wine you're going to be laughing you're going to go i have to go to the bathroom and you're going to trust them with your luggage and the woman because he there's a man and a woman and the woman's going to go i have to go to the bathroom too and she's going to

go to the bathroom with me and then you would go i also have to go to the bathroom so all three women are gonna kiki in the bathroom teehee put on lipstick uh root stuff out of our pussies and show each other what we have up in there i don't know what kind of fun he thought we were gonna have and then he was like and then you're gonna get back to the table and she's gonna leave the bathroom first and he's gonna your luggage will be gone and so will him and so will her and then he's like and then what do you do and i was like go to the cops and he's like what are you gonna tell the cops and i was like that these people stole our luggage and he was like no they're gonna say you were having a fun time you were drinking wine tell them they it was such a like specific yeah long story or like scenario of what could happen to us in

johannesburg if we take our luggage to a restaurant to a restaurant what you're driving us to a hotel right now why do you think we're taking our luggage to a restaurant and it sounds like maybe this happened to him and he's like this is this is what happens to everybody here you gotta watch out gotta have a your head on the swivel make sure you're not just hanging out with strangers with your life with all of your life with all of your luggage and then they and then they take it and if do, you have to say they pulled a gun. It was so wild. It was pretty wild. It was truly so funny.

And you went to sleep immediately after that. And he did ask me, he was like, do you have any questions you want to ask? And I was like, yeah. Do y'all have a chicken in? Because when we were in Zimbabwe, there was a franchise called the Chicken Inn, the Pizza Inn, and the Cream Inn. And I wanted to go to Creamy Inn because they seem to have soft serve.

And he was like, I don't know. I only eat what they prepare me. But at home, I choose what I eat. And I was like, who's they? What's going on? This man talks so much. And I think I fell asleep because my body was like, we don't want to participate anymore. We have to self-destruct.

I had to get my best traveler reward. So I stayed awake and I talked to him and it was mind numbing. And at one point I wanted to scream because he wouldn't stop talking. It was just thing after thing after thing. wouldn't stop talking it was just the thing after thing after thing i will say one of my favorite things about not being in the states is all the different cars in different countries yeah like toyota has so many different models in south africa they have this really cute little buggy looking one it looked like a volkswagen beetle but it wasn't it was toyota um and all the cars are so much smaller and i I was like, wait,

the states should adopt that. We should get smaller cars. Who's carting things around at all times? No one. I'm usually alone in my car or I have Clyde in there. We don't need much space. I just need room for my basketball, my roller skates, my stripper

shoes, and me and my dog. Yeah. I don't know. i guess we're just like a you know a country of abundance we like space there was a moment where um we when we were stuck in kenya at the hotel there they were like sit at a table for breakfast and so I sat at a table and then this stranger sat at my table and was like can I sit here and it was a room full of empty tables and I wanted to be like why? I actually did that happened a different day or a different

I don't know how long we were there. We were there for two years. For a different meal this man sat at our table and I was like, did they seat you here? And he's like, yeah. And I was like, why are you sitting here? And he's like, uh, I just am.

And I was like, okay. And then, but I was like, you don't want to sit somewhere else? You were real caring about it. I was. You're like, can't sit here. But I was like, now we all have to, like, pretend. We're so tired. We haven't, like, slept in a bed in a while.

We just want to, like, not have, like, social graces. And now there's a stranger sitting here that's like, where are you from? And I'm like, I don't want to have this conversation. I want to eat my pancakes sloppily and go to bed but why sloppily this year because i'm too tired to do it squares sloppily i'm gonna grab my hand all right shove it in my face but then okay it happened again with that woman and i I was like, oh, maybe here they're just less concerned with having your own space. Where in America, I feel like everyone, you go to Starbucks, you're like, I want to sit at this four-person table by myself. Don't you dare join me. Don't you dare.

If anything, I'll ask you to get up and leave so I can have this table for me. Yeah. Yeah, that was a very curious thing about it. I'll ask you to get up and leave so I can have this table for me. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That was a very curious thing about it. Another curious thing about that hotel is they had butter sculptures. They had an alligator and some sort of big cat butter sculpture. But it had red eyes.

So I was like, is it a rat? It was pretty wild. It didn't make any sort of sense. Truly disconcerting. Really disconcerting. And I was like, is it for us to use? Because who's going to take a scoop out of this rat? Yeah, I'm not buttering my rolls with a rat.

No, ma'am also when we were checking into that hotel we had been at the air we had been in an airport for so fucking long the lady checking us in her name was nicole and i went oh i'm nicole too is in her name was nicole and i went oh i'm nicole too but she just stared at me and you were like she's tired she's tired oh i'm nicole too um also they tell you if you're not dating anyone here, go abroad. And I did it. I went abroad for 18 years and I didn't meet nobody. Well, that's not true. We went to the Zambia Zimbabwe immigration office and there was a man who said, because

you're very rich and American, you should take me home with you. You're right. OK. And when we were leaving Kenya, this man asked me when I was coming back and I I said, why are you trying to take me somewhere? And he said, yeah, I am. And then he shook my hand and I was like, oh, my God. Oh, OK. So border control when I'm leaving a country is where I'll find somebody where I simply can't go on a date with them. Yes.

Oh my God. And okay. One of our hotels had zoo nuts, um, nuts that you could buy at the zoo. You have to explain that. The Los Angeles zoo has these nuts, these almonds that are so good. They're just like sweet almonds.

And then the hotel candied almonds they're not like exclusive to the zoo they're zoo nuts i've only had them in the zoo and they have them in the seychelles so i was eating these nuts also everywhere we went i had nuts i love nuts and that's the things that you didn't know about me. I didn't know. It was very interesting. But everywhere we went, you were like, ooh, nuts. And then I'd turn around and you're just like sitting on the bed, kicking your feet in the air, eating nuts. And then one time you were so mean to me. You were like, are you going to dinner? Are you going to sit in the bed and eat your nuts?

I was like, oh, I can finish these nuts and go to dinner at any point. Well, because we were like getting ready for dinner. And like we had to like get dressed to like shower and stuff like that and you're just in pajamas kicking your feet eating nuts and i was like are you coming to dinner you're just gonna sit on the bed and eat nuts i was coming i was getting ready i was pre-gaming dinner with my nuts and okay so i ate all the zoo nuts and they hadn't refilled them the next day and i was like i guess no more zoo nuts for me and then you were at a massage and the like someone knocked on the door and this man goes i have your nuts and i was like oh um oh oh and he's like i came to refill your nuts and i was like oh thank you and it was like

real sexual and i was like does this is this man gonna me over zoo nuts and i wish he had i wish i wish he had i wish i got to grip my zoo nuts as he blew my back out he just pours them onto the bed and leaves me on top of all of bed oh i would have loved it would have been sticky but it would have been fun also we got a massage in zimbabwe and the lady who did my massage did not speak very much english and she whispered something at me and i said oh i'm sorry can you say that again and she said no we are finished i think she thought I was asking for a massage again. Yeah. But it made me laugh.

Can I get that again? No. No, we are finished. Yeah, I also had a bruise on my shin that I probably got in the devil's pool because fish were biting my legs and I probably jerked my leg into a rock or something. fish were biting my legs and I probably jerked my leg into a rock or something and so when we're getting the massage I was like hey just so you know I have a bruise on my shin but like everywhere around it is fair game and she's like got it and then she didn't have it and just massaged my full leg and I was like oh ow it actually hurts in this spot and I kept pointing and I was like this spot hurts and she's like got it and then she started massaging just that spot and i was like no i really just don't want you to touch it at all

because it hurts and she's like okay and i was like you know what just move to the other leg she just moved but i was like i don't i don't know how I could have explained that better. It hurts there, so don't touch it. Maybe she was like, oh, it hurts, so I'll massage the hurt out of it. I guess, but no. It's a bruise. We also went to a spa in Johannesburg. And to me, spas are serene and and relaxing but so she was like what time does the spa close and they were like six or seven she was like all right we gotta get to the spa

we like threw our shit down and then she's like i'm ready are you ready get your flops on and we like rushed down to the spa and she's like we gotta get in the hot tub because we only had an hour after we checked in. I was like, we only have an hour, we have to go! Because I was dying to get in some heat. I was like, we were on a bunch of planes. I was cold and frigid and felt gross.

And then we got in the steam room, which felt very good to me. Not so good to you. It was too hot. Yeah, but I like it really too hot. And then we went to the hot tub which was not as hot as we'd like a hot tub i would say it's a lukewarm tub and we were like oh can we turn this up and they were like no i was like okay got it thank you thank you so much also when we were in um that's where we did the game drives at the safari um i watched a monkey shit

in our pool and it was really upsetting because it looked me in the eyes and took a shit couldn't believe it and then i was like a statement it really was it was like you shouldn't be here and i was like all right but i am and then they my home they did clean the pool but like I still was pretty I was like I don't know if I'll get back into that again I don't know yeah I watched so much shit

and I just yeah and I knew they were after my nuts so like we were just enemies maybe that's why they shit in the pool we want your nuts And I knew they were after my nuts. So like we were just enemies. And that's why they shit in the pool. They're like, we want your nuts.

Not my nuts. God. And I've been eating nuts since I got back. I always have a can of peanuts and I've just been munching on them. It's been nice. I just I don't know how I didn't know this about you. I nuts but you're a nut head i'm a nut head i'm a nutty bitch well on the you i don't know how you didn't know on the flight there they kept giving us nuts and you kept saying you didn't want them and i was like take the nuts and give them to your nut friend them and i was like take the nuts and give them to your nut friend yeah but like before this trip i don't recall you like pounding nuts this much

what do nuts have in them potassium i don't know maybe i'm potassium deficient and that's why i need the nuts maybe huh i don't want to be deficient. Well, I don't know. I don't know how you can be. You had so many. I really did. And I really made a mistake when we were in Seychelles. Somebody told us they were like, oh, our new friends who are moving to Cincinnati.

They were like you. Oh, OK. So nuts, protein. So I'm deficient in protein healthy fats fiber vitamins and minerals i don't think because you like nuts and eat them often that's enough proof to say that you are deficient in all of these things i'm deficient in protein and i don't have healthy fat bad fat only and i need more nuts i don't i don't i still don't think there's enough evidence oh man i can't believe this is how i'm finding out i don't have protein and healthy fats yeah there's like actually more official tests you can take to figure out what your defic deficient in. The results are in. Oh, no.

This is terrible. But anyway, our new friends from Cincinnati, they didn't judge me for being deficient in protein, but they were like, you should eat fish because that's like, it's local, it's fresh, it's so good. So I ordered fish and the chef served me a fish full of bones with a head still on and an eyeball looking at me. And the juice, it was a juicy eyeball too and it was oh it was good fish but like the bones made it too hard and i

don't know about you but i i'm a i eat food that i don't have to work for that's not true you like shelling um shrimp and stuff yeah but i don't like when the head is on okay um yeah i mean it's pretty easy to just peel them but i'd rather not you know i don't i'd love to pick up food and put it in my mouth without having to work is that too much to ask is it it? I mean, I will work for peanuts because peanuts are a magical thing to eat because like you shell them and you have them in a bowl. And when you root around, when you think you're done, there's always more peanuts at the bottom. Yeah, one time you were eating peanuts and I think you said something like, this is why I like eating peanuts.

There's always a surprise. and then like, this is why I like eating peanuts. There's always a surprise. Which you're referring to like one peanut that you missed at the bottom of the bowl. Yeah, they're great. And it's an activity, you know? It's like, oh boy, I had such a nice time um but i'm not enjoying doing my dang laundry i haven't even started i i started uh and it's not great i'll tell you that it's really not

great i don't think you're gonna have a good time doing it i think you're gonna be like oh god i hate it oh god yeah i think it's just i don't think you're gonna scream about it but i think you're just gonna be like oh grumble grumble yeah probably and yeah yeah boy oh boy i'm trying to think if I should order Burger King again tonight. Because it wasn't optimal tasting last night. And I'm hoping it tastes better tonight. I think you should wait maybe like 48 hours. Okay.

Because maybe your taste buds will adjust a little bit. Okay. That makes sense. Cause I've been craving Burger King. Yeah. I feel like that's another thing you didn't know about me. How much I love Burger King. This is true.

You mentioned it a few times and I was like, oh wait, you sincerely like Burger King? And you're like oh wait you sincerely like burger king and you're like yes i crave whoppers but we've i don't think we've gotten burping together i mean yeah burping's not a thing you share with your friends like what what How would you feel, Sashir, if I called you up one day and I was like, hey, do you want to go out to eat my treat? And you said yes. And I picked you up and took you to Burger King. You would be so mad at me. This is true.

Or if I was like, Sashir, let's go to Burger King. You would go, no. There's no world where I'm sharing my love of whoppers with you as unfortunate as that is this is a very good point i would be confused i'd be like why is this even a suggestion but i will say this their soft serve machine always works yeah always not like some other places i know that begin with the m and end with the s i think there's wait mcdonald's yes yeah yeah i did get it yes okay but i was trying to remember if mcdonald's was suing the soft serve machine company or the machine company. I think the machine company is suing McDonald's because they're like, oh, our machines never work.

And then the company was like, our machines work perfectly. I don't know what y'all are doing, but you are giving our brand a bad name because you keep saying our machines don't work that's pretty intense the neglect on mcdonald's part is affecting another company you know what we talked about a little bit franchises franchising is interesting yes i could open my very own burger king if I wanted to. And it would be my Burger King. But then I have to give Burger King a percentage of the money I earn, even though it's my Burger King? Yeah, because it's still their name, their logo, their everything, really.

Yeah, you run it, but it's their company still but then is franchising worth it i really don't know um i think some i think if you open up your own location yeah i think you make money i don't know but i have no idea how it breaks down location yeah i think you make money i don't know but i have no idea how it breaks down i wonder how much money you make a year franchising judith do you mind looking up how much money you make a year franchising a burger king are you trying to do it i don't know i'm thinking okay uh i mean wouldn't it be really cool if I opened a Burger King? I don't know if it'd be really cool. You could come through and get a Whopper whenever you want.

Yeah, but I can also do that at any other Burger King too. You're right. Oh, the franchise fee is $50,000 and requires a total investment of $300,000 and 2 million doulas. And then what? And then I have to pay them 4.5% in royalties. Can you click on how much is a Burger King franchise owner making a year? Oh, I can make a million dollars annually? So I make eight. Whoa. Okay. And at top performing locations, you can make more than two million. Okay. I

might open a Burger King. Great. Maybe I'll be the queen of Burger King. The Burger Queen. The Burger Queen of Burger King. And then I'll have to find my Burger King to rule my burgers with. To rule the kingdom. Yeah, these are all pipe dreams. I don't think that's something i'll actually

do though i also don't i mean maybe there's no i don't think i was gonna say i don't think you can customize your location oh i think it has to look like the rest of the other burger kings and i don't think you'd be happy with that I don't think you'd be happy with that. I don't think I'd be happy with that either. Because if I were to franchise a McDonald's, I would want it to be a Grimace McDonald's. Where everything is purple. And we have purple buns.

We're the Grimace McDonald's. Maybe I'll write a letter and ask. You should. I mean, I feel like that's a good pop-up idea. Right? Mm-hmm. I told you, I'm filled with great ideas. Filled.

Filled to the brim. Overflowing, my cup-eth runneth over. Sashir. Nicole. What was the most exciting thing you did when you got home? Like today? When you got home from Africa. I mean, a hot shower felt really good.

I texted you after. I was like, I just took a shower. Highly recommend. You were like, I have taken a shower before i did that immediately well i mean i had to i was wearing the same clothes for two days i was wearing the same underwear for two days that's stinky that's gross yeah but it was

extenuating circumstances because our travel got all messed up at the end yeah um i'll tell you what i loved i fell asleep in the weirdest way on my couch and when i woke up i was like that wasn't comfortable but i'm home wow that's nice do you want to take a quiz or something yes do that let's do it um oh eat nothing but mexican food for 24 hours and i'll guess if you're more introverted or extroverted. Great. Let's do that. That sounds fun. You want to know what I came home to?

Lots of packages. But if one of those packages had guess what kind of books in there? You get three guesses. Self-help. No. Erotic. No. Cooking.

No. These were all great guesses.itters club books okay let's get into the quiz okay eat nothing but mexican food for 24 hours and i'll guess if you're more introverted or extroverted okay pick one tacos quesadilla or as a lady said to us in africa quesadilla uh menudo oh machata machaca oh machaca i don't know i don't know what a machaca is i don't either looks like a loose taco. It does. I'm going to say quesadilla. I'm going to say taco.

Ooh. I do love a taco. Pick one. Burritos? Chile, chile. T tostadas elote i love elote you do love corn speaking of corn i had corn soup in africa and i now like soup yeah it changed everything i wonder it's because of klm uh the the dutch airways um they served me this soup that was so good and then i had two more good soups i i'm a soup head i'm choosing burrito i am proud of you for trying new things.

You try a lot of new things. You're like, I don't know what this is. And then you would bite into it and you'd be like, ooh, I like that. Or, no, I don't like that. But I feel like, you know, pre-Africa Nicole would be like, I'm not going to try that at all. I already know I don't like it. Well, I was like, I'm going back to where my people are from. I better taste some of their stuff.

And we had, it's like, it's soup. Corn soup. My people ate corn soup. It was passed down through generations. It was taken on the boats. When we were dropped off, we survived on corn soup. We also had malva pudding, which is one of the most delicious things

I've ever fucking had. That's so good. Oh. Pick one. Enchiladas. Tamales. Huevos rancheros. Conchas.

I don't know what a concha is. It's like a pastry oh okay sweet bread oh oh it looks like a seashell oh nice okay well i love a tamale I like huevos rancheros. Ooh, she said, give me eggs. Give me eggs. Pick one. Chip and guacamole. Verdea.

Pico de gallo. Ceviche. I'm picking chips and guacamole. I fucking love guacamole. I also will do chips and guacamole. I fucking love guacamole. I also will do chips and guacamole. The first time I had guacamole, because I thought I hated avocado, because my dad ate it all the time, and I was like, I'm not like that man.

Tess made me guacamole, and I was like, you can make it yourself, and she was like, you can make anything yourself, and that really opened my eyes. Pick one more. Horchata uh how do i say that jaritos jaritos jaritos uh topo chico mexican hot chocolate I do like horchata I'm gonna go with horchata nice

it's good and it's milky and spicy who's that? that is Sashiris oh I'm an introvert duh you tend to stick to yourself but you still love to socialize and hang out with your friends your nights out just look a bit different than most you love a good night at the movie theater or taking a painting class i've never done that before you haven't taken a painting class. No, but I guess I would. I'm an extrovert.

You're someone who can't stand the thought of being left alone or sitting in one place for too long. You're always on the go. On to the next fun, bright idea, or whatever adventure you have in mind. I think this is dead on. Yes. And then your picture is spongebob with cross eyes and mine was daria

who i do associate with i've never seen daria that was my one of my favorite shows when i was younger wow a lot of people like daria from what i understand yes i grew up without cable so like i i don't really i don't know daria i don't know beavis and butthead i don't know dog cat cat dog oh okay i do know doug funny i got to i got to see him you got to see him yeah i saw him the most i feel like when i get cable look people's homes yeah i like that um but i'm big on arthur because that was a pbs show and uh we got PBS. Nice. I said, hey, hey, it's a wonderful kind of day where you learn to work and play

and get along with each other. I can't remember anything in my life, but I'll never forget the Arthur theme song. Wasn't that like by Ziggy Marley or something? Or like, I believe so. The Marley Man. I think it was a Marley Man. I think it was a Marley or something? I believe so. The Marley Man. I think it was a Marley Man. I think it was a Marley Son.

Bob Marley Son's name is Ziggy? Ziggy Marley! Yeah, there it is. Ziggy's a great name. Mm-hmm. I think if I had a kid, I'd name them Ziggy ziggy nope i'd name them deuteronomy yes we already know what you what you would do should we answer a world question yeah just a world question

oh this is a world question. Foreign exchange friendship gone bad. Hi, Nicole and Sashir et al. What does that mean? And like et al, like and everyone else. Oh, it's et al? Mm-hmm. Oh. Let me get straight into it.

Let me get straight into it. I have a friendship question that's been on my mind more than I care to admit. So last year, I went on exchange to the U.S. for a semester. I am from Europe. I wonder where. Europe is pretty big. In the first couple weeks, I became friends with two other European girls. Let's call them Annie and Dew. Annie and Dew were roommates do for roommates or dough.

Oh, I don't know. I mean, it is do it's just D.O. It is a very I thought I was dumb. It's a very funny name to pick. OK, Annie and do or do were roommates and did everything together. I genuinely liked hanging out with both of them. However, Annie and I got along a little better. That is a little bit of an understatement.

Annie and I really connected fast. People started to comment on it and news and spread rumors that we were dating. We weren't. She identifies as straight. I do not. Even my best friend from home commented on our chemistry when he first met Annie. This really pissed off Dew and during a party she started an argument with Annie about it. Needless to say this really

upset Annie and she didn't want to lose her friend but mainly didn't want drama in her room. This fight impacted the rest of my exchange as my friend and the person and I felt safe with all of a sudden started acting really cold and distant when we were in group settings. When Annie and I were alone, it was fine, but we didn't get the chance to see each other as much because she often had to do something with Doe. The only other time she would act towards me like she did in the beginning was when we'd have a few drinks, which would often piss off her roommate again because she would be giving me too much attention. This all fucked me up pretty bad, especially when Annie told me about the things Doe had said behind my back.

Now we've been back in Europe for a little bit and Annie and I have been keeping in touch. We used to text every day and have gone on a couple of trips together. I know she also keeps in touch with Doe. Annie always told me that she did not forgive Doe for the way she treated me. When I would expose my insecurities, she would always reassure me that I wasn't Doe and that things are different with me. One of the insecurities that I have is that I don't want to over text her. I do or I know that Doe does that. Doe does do that. I have always felt a little bad for Doe because I felt like Annie was leading her on a bit. Annie would tell me she didn't want too much contact with Doe, yet she wouldn't tell Doe that. Now I have started to feel Annie pull away

from me a little bit while she's in full contact with Doe. They're texting every day, calling, and going on trips together. Now my question is, what should I do? I respect her boundaries too much to text Annie as much as Doe does, but I don't want to lose my friend. I'm also a little upset at Annie for being this close to someone who hurt me and her as much as Doe did, but I also don't want to come between her and her friend. I've tried bringing this up with her multiple times, but every time she'll just tell me what she thinks I want to hear and maybe stop mentioning Doe for a little while. Only for me to hear a month later she has planned two new trips with Doe.

Thanks for reading my long email. I love the podcast a lot. It gave me so much needed giggles and familiarity on my long walks on campus during my exchange. Mmm. Okay. I personally think doe is none of your business this person is out of your life and i think annie i do think annie will either not respond or tell you that you're reaching out

too much uh i think you should text annie as much as you want because that's your friend. And I think you got to get dough out of your brain because that person isn't in your life anymore. And their relationship really isn't your business. And I know your feelings are hurt, but Annie has said to you that you do mean something to her and she wishes to continue your friendship. And it's not nice that she wasn't nice to you in mixed settings, but also it sounds like you guys are young

and it sounds like that was maybe a mistake because of age and not realizing that you don't have to do things like that. I think that's really good. Yeah. I have friends who are friends with people that I don't care for or we're just not friends. Or something actually happened. But that is their business.

That's their relationship. And them remaining friends with someone who you don't get along with doesn't mean they don't have your back it's just they're viewing their relationships separately so i don't think you have to bring it up with her with annie at all um and definitely don't need to keep talking talking it with Annie because it probably makes Annie uncomfortable. Yeah, just enjoy the relationship that you do have. And I also agree with Nicole that you don't have to worry about over texting because if this person enjoys talking to you,

they will be happy to get your text. Yeah. Yeah. Get do or do out of your brain because that means do or do one if they're just on your brain like that. Don't let them rent space in your in your mind room without paying rent. That's what they say. Solved. Solved.

Hi, Nicole and Sashir. I have been listening to your podcast for a really long time, and I love you guys. It's a great podcast. I moved to a different state about a year and a half ago, and since moving, it's been next to impossible to make new new friends being an adult is weird with making friends um my husband works from home too so he doesn't really have the opportunity to make any so I've been out and about in the world trying to find people to hang out with us um I've made one friend which is cool um but I have two co-workers they're male human male co-workers um they are super cool though and I feel like I vibe

with them more than anyone else at work um they're like my favorite people to hang out with they're really funny um I think they think I'm really funny I've gotten one to hang out with me before um for a tailgate and then like some beers after and hang out with my husband too. Amazing vibes. But the D2, I like a lot. I want them to be my friend outside of work. I don't know how to ask that, though. Like, some people don't like to be friends with their coworkers outside of work. Also, they have friends here, so they might not be on the market for any. And I also don't want to it's like weird for

me to ask I guess like someone with opposite sides like be my friend please but I don't want to be taken any further away which I don't think it will I'm not like shooting my own horn I don't know I'm making this conversation weird now but basically I want to know how to try to make these cars be my friend outside of work um because I think they like me too. I get that vibe that they do. I think we're good. But anyway, thanks for any advice. And I love listening to your podcast. And I love you.

I think you could be vulnerable and honest. Like, just be like, hey, I'm new here. I like you guys. can we hang after work or like what are you guys doing this weekend can i come like or like what are you what are you doing can i do the thing as well um and as far as the opposite sex thing, I think if it's, like, if you ask maybe both the guys, like, if it's a group thing, it'll be clear. Like, it's not, you're not trying to, like, hang one-on-one and, like, there's no, like, salacious business. I wish it was more, I think it kind of, it is sometimes normal for people to hang out with opposite sex friends. it is sometimes normal for people to hang out with opposite sex friends but like for some reason there's still like an underlying like oh wait is this a thing is this gonna be like i've definitely

asked men to hang out and then they'll be like oh well i have a girlfriend and i'm like oh cool that's not why i was asking you to hang out and now it's weird. But yeah, I think if it's like a group setting, they will, I think, understand that this is the, that you want to be their friend. And also it sounds like they've hung out with your husband before,

so they should understand that anyway. But yeah, I think you can just be like, I want to like hang out with you after work or outside of work because I'm new and in the market for friends. Yeah, I agree. I think there's nothing wrong with being like, I'm new and I want a friend. So let me hang out with you guys. And since you've already hung out, like they like you.

Yeah. So, yeah, just like jump in with open toes and have a nice open toes open toes full heart and hang out with them and have a nice time yeah yeah i'm yeah i guess people do do that uh I've never had someone be like, oh, I have a girlfriend. I don't think I'm a threat. So I don't think people feel the need to do that. They're just like, oh, okay, let's hang out. But are you hanging out with many straight men?

I mean, all the improv boys I've ever hung out with are straight men i think that's different though because it's like uh we're all like just comedians who are like i don't know at a show at a bar at you know we're like we're all hanging all the time but i think if it's like i don't know your co-worker, like, mm-hmm. I was going to say the same thing as Nicole. Like, my two male straight, not, I mean, one is bi, one is straight, but met them in improv, and we, like, I was truly, like, I'm going to take this class and, like, go out my merry way,

like, not be friends with anyone because I'm close-minded clearly um and i instantly connected with these guys and it became like after improv we would like either go to a show and then we'd be on the sidewalk like talking for like another hour and just like something happened and it it took me being like hey like do you guys want to go out and get like dinner sometime and they were like yeah let's do this it'll be so fun but i have had jobs in the past where i have had male straight friends before and i've been like hey i was like thinking about going bowling or like going to like the billiards place and like grabbing a beer like playing pool like would anyone like want to come and i think when you open up the conversation it's actually far easier than people realize and it's it's just that easy like just be like hey i was thinking of doing this this weekend would any of you guys want to join and yeah nine out of ten

times i say yes so yeah yeah so straight from the horse's mouth. Someone who's done it. Are you calling Jordan a horse? What's more elegant than a horse? You tell me what's more elegant than a horse. One thing. You're having trouble. Name one thing more elegant than a horse. A butterfly. I am calling Jordan majestic.

But is a butterfly powerful? No, ma'am. I didn't know power had to be part of it. Isn't that a phrase? A horse's mouth? Yes, it is. It was just very strange

for you to say it directly after Jordan was speaking. I think you're right, Jordan. I'm really sorry I called you a horse. I think you're right. Jordan, I'm really sorry I called you a horse. I think you're like a really nice friend in person who's really outgoing and did a really good job of

getting more friends and stuff. Thanks, Nicole. Listen, I'll take it. Horses, you're right horses are majestic and that's fine i'll be compared to can i ride you just kidding well if you have any questions or queries from the horse's mouth, you can email Nicole and Sashir at gmail.com or call or text or leave a voice memo at 424-645-7003.

We also have merch at podswag.com slash best friends. We have transcripts for our new episodes. You can check them out on our show page at earwolf.com. Lastly, don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe. That's the easiest way to support this show.

Yes. Well, I have to ride off into the sunset. See you guys. Giddy up. Yee-haw.