Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Sasheer Might Try Bouldering (w/ Tawny Newsome)

Episode Date: October 29, 2025

We have a very special guest this week - one of Nicole and Sasheer's best friends, actor and musician Tawny Newsome (Space Force, Star Trek: Lower Decks)! The trio gets into strength-training, the multitude of activities you can do outside with your friends, the joy of adult coloring books, and Tawny's memorable night on the town that solidified a best friendship.Watch this full video on YouTube and follow below!Follow Nicole: Twitter, Instagram, TikTokFollow Sasheer: Instagram, TikTokLike the show? Rate Best Friends 5 stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts!Have a friendship question for Nicole and Sasheer to solve? Leave us a voicemail at [phone]‬ or write in at [e-mail] Friends is a production of Headgum Studios. Our producer is Allie Kahan. Our executive producer is Anya Kanevskaya. The show is edited, mixed, and engineered by Richelle Chen.This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Best Friends via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. The holidays are right around the corner. If you know me, you know I'm a bit of a planner. And I like to get ready ahead of time, which is especially true this year, since I have some big work trips in November and December that'll make everything extra hectic. So I'm going to take advantage of Macy's friends and family sale, which is going on right now through November 3rd. Perfect for me!

They have some gorgeous 100% percent. cashmere sweaters and tons of colors for under $100, which I'll be buying for myself. And a few people on my gift list, you really can't go wrong with cashmere. There are also a couple of dresses from Avec Lafie and Carl Lagerfeld Paris. I'll work perfectly with my work trips and holiday parties, done and done. And then I could also use some new boots to take my outfits up a notch. So I'm going to grab this super cute slouchy pair from Steve Madden. They're honestly worth building my whole Thanksgiving outfit around. Shop at Macy's.com or in store.

I say, we're ready. And then we're not going to tell you. I like a surprise. Is anything going to fall on me? Who knows? Wait, that's a funny thing to do to people. No, it's not. I have something fall on them?

Just like soft things. Oh, okay. Just, like, rig something soft to, like, fall down on somebody. Like a bunch of loboos. Mm-hmm. A bunch of lace. Okay, now they're ready. Okay.

Hi, Sashir. Hi, Nicole. We have someone here. We do. It's our good friend, Tony Newsome. Hi. She stars opposite Kevin Hart and Wesley Snames in the Netflix limited series, True Story.

True story. And was a series regular in the series regular in the Steve Carell and Greg Daniels Netflix series Space Force. She voices the lead character. Oh, can you say this for me? Ensign Beckett Mariner. Ensign, Beckett, Mariner on the Star Trek

Animated Series, Star Trek, Lower Decks for Paramount Plus. It's not that you say. Donnie! Yay! Beepa, boobab, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ha, ha, ha,ler. Okay. Oh, space. Space. Space.

That was space. That was Medea scatting in space. It starts a dare. I would watch Medea goes to space. How have they not done that yet? I don't know. I think they're trying to keep it grounded. No, no, it seems insane.

They wrote it, they filmed it, and they shelved it because they, like, released something they weren't supposed to do in it. It's happened. Yeah. I do want to see Medea's family vacation. I think that's the newest one. Does she play all of them, allah, the clumps?

No, I don't think so. Okay. Because Medea's just Medea and her brother. or Tyler Perry plays Medea and Medea's brother. Okay. Then sometimes we'll be Tyler Perry or a character in it. It's very confusing. Cool, cool, cool.

But yeah, I think they shot the Medea Family Vacation one in Atlantis in the Bahamas. Really? I think so. That's funny. Right? Who else is in the family? And why didn't we get those casting calls? I don't know.

I never get casting calls for Tyler Perry. I don't either. And I talk about him so much. Oh, maybe we found out why. Well, no, I love him. Oh, okay. It's usually pretty positive. Okay.

I love him. Do you find, though, that as a comedian, even when you talk about something positively, people are like, she's making fun of me. And sometimes I'm like, no, I'm earnest. I love this thing. Yes. I mean, Ben Schwartz thought I was mocking him or doing a bit about how much I love Sonic. No, I love Sonic. Yeah.

Sometimes your, when you love something, the intensity is so much that people are like, this has to be a joke. It has to be or else. My sense of self is like eroding. I need this to be a joke. I think I just, I'm very enthusiastic. Yes, I love that about you. Hey, thank you.

And I think there's like a assumption that comedians are usually trying to undercut something. Yes. Like we can't take anything serious. Because we usually are and we usually can't. So people are fair to think that about us. But then sometimes I'm like, no, I just want to be a sweet softie. Yeah. Are you enthusiastic about anything right now?

Ooh, so many things. Oh, I love to hyperfixate. Ooh. My therapist says as long as I'm hyperfixating on relatively healthy things, it's okay to have such a large imbalance because I will go so hard on a thing for like six months. And then I'll be like, never speak to me about that thing again. But right now it's actually lasting a while. Right now I'm very in the gym. I'm very into fitness.

I've been rock climbing. I've been doing, I've always been a hiker. but now I've really been like supplementing it with like straight up lifting weights. Women, we have to lift weights so our bones don't turn to butter. This is true. Our bones are going to turn to butter. We're going to turn to Paula Dean's favorite thing?

Yes, we will, but we'll be less delicious. We have to do it as we age. We have to lift the heaviest things. Oh no, I can't believe it. Yeah, I do it. Yeah. I've been out. I haven't been lifting because I hurt my, who's this?

What is this? That's the inside of your elbow? Yes, I hurt my elbow doing polio. hole. So I'm taking a sabbatical from lifting the heavy stuff. Okay. I have a 50 pound kettlebell that I squat with at my house. Hell yeah. Why? Wait, what happened? It's so hard. Why'd you get sad? It's so hard. My trainer Ben, who lives in the UK, he's always like, you have to go to, you have to go. Wait. He's not English. He's Scottish. You have to go to failure. That's Irish. That feels like Irish, yeah.

Nicole, you have to go to failure. And what are you saying? Failure? Yes. You have to go to failure? You have to lift to failure, otherwise you're not doing anything. Oh. Or you could lift within two reps of failure.

It depends on if your goal's hypertrophy or just preventing sarcopena. See, I'm in it. Who's sarcopena? That would be such a good drag name, actually. Yeah, it sounded like a person. I think it just means when you age and your bones start turning to butter and your muscles start turning into beef jerky. And what was the other word you said? Hypertrophy?

Who's that? She means when you lift so that your muscles get bigger. That's what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get a fatter ass. Hell yeah. You need progressive overload. See, I'm insufferable right now. But yeah, you're saying all the things that Ben says that I'm just like, what are you saying?

Give me Ben's number. I will. He's very nice. Yeah, yeah, just to hang. He would love it. I'm like, hey, yeah. No, I don't need a coach. I don't need your services.

I just kind of want to chop it up about the game. And are you going to like a regular gym? Thank you so much for asking. This was, it's like I engineered this. It's like I was like, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to go on there and I'm going to make them talk about lifting weights. No, so I bought a bunch of dumbbells for my house. And then I was like, oh, should I also join a gym?

But I've also been going bouldering. So a couple of times I've used the gym at the bouldering place because you can like use the machines and stuff. and then you can do a little climb up a rock. But I've been bouncing around gyms to try and be like, do I also want a gym? Because at a certain point, you know, you just get too strong, hate to brag. So I can't have enough dumbbells at my house. They don't, I would just be, it would be littered in dumbbells.

So I need a gym at some point. Get kettlebells. I have a couple of those. Because I, what do I have? I have some little weights and then I have 15, 20, 25, 35, 50. Hell yeah. And then they're in a little basket. Aw.

I have seen a kettlebell that home goods sells kennelbells. Oh, sorry. The basket is good. You were like, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute. Stopped you dead ass in your tracks. And it's like Halloween colored and says like home is where the booze on it. Sparkles are falling all of it. I've seen a kettlebell where it's a big weight and then you like,

move like a little like dial and then a smaller weight can come out or smaller. It's like a Russian doll of kettlebells. Yeah. And they have a dumbbells like that too. But I'd already bought my dumbbells. So then I was like, I don't know if I need those. And I have a little, what's this one? You have a bench, like a bench press?

You have a bar. But a little one and it's pink. Why is it little? Because I didn't want the six foot one. So I got a four foot one. Oh, oh, short little. Not like, I don't know why I. picture, like, very thin.

And I'm like, oh, it's a pencil. This is a long pencil. Yeah, me and Clyde are doing it. We're like, oh, ooh, ooh. Dogs should lift weights, frankly. Honestly, he should also get a job. Yeah. And pay taxes.

He doesn't contribute to the household. Tax the rich. That includes dogs. Yes, it's wild. He lives rent-free in my house. I pick up his shit. Yes. I feed him.

And then he's like, play with me. Oh, my gosh. Speak on it. It really is a lot of people thinking about it. What is he bringing to the table? Bad breath But then I figured out that was my fault This is taking a turn

It was the treats I was giving him They were making the breath a little hot So now he eats probiotics They got to be like in a treat form or something Right? Yeah they're shaped like a bone Okay He's not just eating straight up probiotics No and I don't even know what a probiotic is

Helps your gut health Okay I knew you would know Yeah Wait what's a boulder gym Bouldering. So bouldering, look, I just started climbing. You guys, no stolen valor here. I'm not going to act like I'm some elite level climber. But bouldering is just where you can just, with your hands, climb up like 15 feet. And there's like a crash pad down below, as opposed to being in a harness with ropes. So you're not going up that high. Okay. And you feel safe without the harness and the, in the, belaying in the ropes. Yeah, because it's only like 12, 15 feet. And I'm like almost six feet. So it's not very far to fall. do the math no it's two tony it really hurt oh okay thank you that was nice so yeah i'm only one of me really up in the air and so if i'm like oh i can't hold on and like you let go you just fall another of me and that's not that far so it doesn't bother me have you ever done it would you ever do it no the

next thing i was going to say was you going to take me you want to go i think is this like the time you texted me, hey, I like being outside. I might want to go on a little hike now. And then when I asked you about it in person, you said, hey, I don't know what got into me that day. I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa. I was having such a nice day. And you go, I'll go on a hike for less than a half hour. I'm like, bitch, you texted me. I didn't ask. I didn't do this. I didn't open this door. Like, stop bothering me about this. I think she put a hand in my face. I said, ma'am. I really do think I did. I don't need you. I was like, okay. I said, you, you, you'll, you, like, You yelled at me in my phone.

What happened was I was having such a lovely day outside and I was like, wow, my friend Tani loves hiking. Maybe she'll take me on a hike. So then I text it and then you asked, then became too real. I asked one follow-up question. You hike for like nine hours and you're

out there and you have like a walk-in stick and that's scary. The sticks are really good for your knees. The trekking poles, they help your knees and your balance. They're good. Anyone who's not like 19 years old and or a mountain goat should be using trekking poles. Well, I'm certainly not a mountain goat.

How do I, where do I get a poll from? R.E.I. Who's that? Or Amazon. What's REI? How are we doing like the most insufferable who's on first? You can get them online. Just order a trekking pole. You can get the cheapest one.

You can carry one. You can carry two. It's good. It disperses your weight so that as you're moving, it's not just all on your two feet. become like a four-legged animal. And so it's good on your knees, your joints. How steep are these inclines? It depends. The earth is varied. It's varied.

Boy, oh, boy. I'm nervous. I'm going to go, though. Are you? You were mad when I brought it up. Yeah, I kind of got mad again. Yeah, I see it. I see it. I think it was to be outside.

Yes. Maybe we could go to a park all of us. That sounds nice. I like a park. Yeah. That's pretty flat. And I can be outside. Yeah.

But I do want to go bouldering. Why that now? I don't know. That seems okay. I think I, yeah, going up. I don't know. It sounds like pole. That's true.

You have a lot of strength from pole, so I bet you'd be great at it. But I might be bad at it. Don't know until they try. Yeah. It doesn't. Literally no one cares there. Oh.

Yeah. I like the vibe of a bouldering gym because it's, first of all, it feels very like, it feels like the weirdos. It's a bunch of queer people. A lot of people alone. Like a lot of women

And just with, like, a huge set of headphones just kind of, like, on their phone or, like, reading a book in between, like, while they rest. And then they just go scurry up a thing. And then they drop down. And then they sit there and read. I was like, I like this energy. Have you made any friends there? No, I would, I would not. I would not talk to a person.

No. No, I want to be. That's very funny. No, I want to go with my boyfriend or alone. I don't want to talk to anybody. Do you talk to people in a fitness environment? In poll classes, a little. Really?

Just a little. I never made, like, friend friends, but, like, I have acquaintances from pole. How do you start a conversation in an exercise scenario? Usually it is, so, like, at the end of a poll class, we'll do, like, a free dance or something. Or, like, when you're working on something as a class that, like, a couple people got it and most of us don't got it, you kind of just, like, encourage each other. And then, like, maybe that develops into, like, a little bit more of a conversation. But usually it sticks to, like, oh, you almost got your, I don't know the names of any of the things. Your thingy, your hip-holed or whatever.

And then you maybe talk a little bit more. But, yeah, it doesn't really devolve past poll. I just realized, I asked a question that made me maybe sound like a serial killer. That's like, how do you just be nice in public? And you describe something very basic. Like, encourage people. Talk about the thing you're doing. Well, a workout class does seem intimidating because you're like, we're all here for the class.

You could just go in, work out, go home. There's like, it's not actually a conducive environment for conversation. So you do kind of have to like make a move. Yeah. I also feel like there's a lot of conversation already happening in my brain between myself and my body dysmorphia that I have to like, that takes up most of my time. Like she and I are in a conversation. Oh. So it's, it takes a lot to then come outside of that.

and then be like, how are you today to another human? Wait, what is your body dysmorph? Is this too personal to ask what your body dysmorphia is telling you? Doesn't every woman over 35 have body dysmorphia? Mine's the opposite, though. I think I'm smaller than I am. In my whole life, I've always thought that. And then sometimes when I squeeze through things, I'm like,

that's so wild that I had to squeeze. Why didn't I breeze through this small opening? And then sometimes I'll pass a mirror and be like, oh, but bigger than I thought. Oh, my God. So, yeah, in my head, I'm like, I'm like, I'm sure small. I love that. I'm like Thumbelina in my head.

I like this, I like that side of it. Well, it's tough because when you like walk past a mirror or something, you're like, huh. Right. That's not what I think I. It's strange. Yeah. I guess I just think like everyone over 35, unless they had like, I don't know, a therapist for a mother. We all lived through the 2000s where like Nicole Richie was the fact.

one on the simple life. Remember, like, the 2000s were crazy. Remember that picture of Jessica Simpson that went around? She was a size four. Oh, my God. Which is really wild. How do any of us live and like ourselves after going through that? That's pretty rough.

Yeah. You have my body dysmorphia. We need to trade. We need to just time share the dysmorphia so we have balanced. Is that possible? Probably. Okay. I don't know.

Technology's gotten pretty far. Go to a scientist person. They could, I don't know, lift a piece of our bra. Hey, it's okay. Hey. Hey. No, you're getting there. No, no, no.

Hey, Nicole. We saw the vision. Yeah, we were with you. You're among friends. Thanks, guys. You're welcome. Do you want to have a little more of that? Yeah.

Okay. That's good. It's real good. Why don't we all take a sip? Oscars even exist? Did K-pop Demon Hunters give us the song of the summer? Can pop culture predict a recession? Each week on the Sam Sanders show, Sam and his guests ask big questions and offer hot takes about the entertainment we're obsessed with. Join all the best people in the know, like people like us, comedians, journalists, celebrities, as they make sense of the zeitgeist

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wherever you get your podcast and on YouTube. But yeah, take me to your rock gym. I'll do that. Would you do that? I would do it. Hell yeah. So she said she'd come back to pull with me and I burst into tears and then the next week hurt my arm.

Yeah. I'm still waiting for an invite. I'm ready. Well, I think I have two more weeks and I think I'm okay. All right. Because I could do that again. Did you have to go to physical therapy? No, I don't do that.

As like a matter of principle? I don't really believe in it. It exists. Yeah, I know it exists. I just don't think it'd be helpful for me. I think I could just figure it out on my own. Okay. Look, guys, I've been hyper-fixating on gym shit for a year.

I am resisting the worst parts of my personality right now to not yell at you about that. That's not what friends do. Well, I'll tell you, I rehabilitated my ankle pretty well on my own. My trainer was like, you actually have like pretty good flexibility with it with what you've been doing. Oh, cool. Because every day I do a dumb little stretch with it. Did you make up the stretch or did someone show it to you? I looked online.

Okay, so you're using, you're doing your own research to like do physical therapy type things with your body. And my trainer is a physical. physical therapist so he does some we do some stretches together that he's like and then you do them you do them on your own and I go yes okay and then my poll teacher has given me some exercises

and then with my elbow I've just got online and looked up things that counts you're doing it I thought you were just like vibes just ride talking it babe just gonna wait see how I feel now I work on it and I try to make sure that I can do things

and then I was like I gave myself two weeks. I was like, if two weeks if it doesn't get better, and it's still like really, really hurts, then I'll go see a doctor or something. See, this is good. This is an informed approach. Hey, thank you. Yeah, you're welcome. I like it. I'm sorry, I gave you shit for it.

It's okay. It's okay. We talked about that, about how people think you don't know what you're talking about. Yes. But then you've like done research and you're like, I do actually know about this. Only sometimes. I would say 65% of the time I do actually know what I'm

talking about, and then 35% of the time, I don't know. That's not a bad ratio, honestly. Hey, thanks. Because I feel like there's people out there just going zero 100.

Oh, yeah. But act in the opposite. Mm-hmm. Yeah, all people who think they know what they're talking about and have done zero research. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And a lot of them have podcasts. I was going to say this. Oh, my gosh. It gets amplified. Yeah.

At least when I say things on the podcast, I'm And I'm like, this. I go, actually, I don't know. You got to look it up on your own. I don't know. Or we look it up. Oh, yes. We sometimes have Alley Lookup stuff.

Oh, what could we have Alley Lookup right now? Ooh, let's see. What's something we've all been wondering? What is something I've been wondering? That's funny. I'm usually filled with questions and queries. I guess we know everything we need to know. I guess you know everything.

Mild. Oh, nice. We've reached the end? We've reached the end? Maybe look up a fun group outdoor activities that aren't hiking. Ooh. Okay. I would like to see that.

Hey, team, I'm going to a, thank you. Also, I figured out how to Google search and get rid of AI. How? How? Yeah, you have to scroll. If you're on Google, you have to scroll all. the way down to the right and there's a web setting. Oh, yes, yes.

So now changed the game. Okay, so I'm looking at Teen Vogue, 65 things to do with friends outside that's not hiking. Create a mini nature zine. Create a zine. Make a magazine? We have to go into publishing? I just wanted to go outside. I just wanted to sit in a park dog. Oh, you want to go outside?

A VR competitor. Also, part of that feels like it has to be inside. I had to print things. Yeah, that's funny. What's number Visit a public sculpture garden. That's closer. That's nice. Closer.

Three is go geocatching. All right. Too much already. What's geocaching? That used to be a thing where you'd find like little treasures that people had left but using a GPS. Is that still the same thing? Yeah. Yeah.

You download an app and you find hidden treasure in your area and it's like a real life scavenger hunt. Whoa. We can't, what that, what? No, we can't go looking for treasure in Los Angeles. Stranger people's treasure? It will be syringes. We can't. We can't do that.

Teen Vogue, what are you doing? Go fruit picking. That sounds nice. Okay. Yeah. Explore a local cemetery respectfully. No. Respectfully.

I like that respectfully was there? Why? If I ever got a text that was like, do you want to go to the cemetery? I'd be like, nah, dude. No, thank you. I've also don't think I've ever paired the word explore with respectfully. I've never explored something disrespectfully. I actually have done a scavenger hunt in a cemetery.

Really? So you have explored disrespectful. That is pretty disrespectful. I hope they thought it was respectful. It was like, it was like Valentine's theme. So there was like little like things you had to find like a gravestone of like a couple or like this. person was born in this year and this person died in this year find the pair or whatever and like yeah you're just like walking around seeing seeing who was there I won't even go to the movies at that cemetery because I think it's disrespectful me either I don't like well I also just don't want to watch a movie alongside a bunch of dead people yeah there's something about it you're always alongside a bunch of dead people well this feels like I've gone to their place of worship yeah I went to their home I went to their house if they come in my house I'm like whatever

you know what we're chill it's fine right now we're watching dune too guys for me to go to their house and then be like we're watching fast and furious nine i'm just like it's so loud that's so funny we're watching fast and furious nine i don't know what they watch at that thing i've never gone to it i've never gone either they watch things like back to the future which feels too like happy for the dead yeah but then do you watch something that's like about dead people and things there i don't know i don't why do Why did it start? I don't know. Why did someone say, we're going to watch movies on, are people sitting on gravestones?

Is that like? No, no, no. Oh, God. No, it's just like an open patch of grass. How do we know there's not? The actual gravestones are pretty far from where the movie happens. How do we know there's not graves under that grass? Yeah.

I guess we don't. I don't like it. I don't like it either. It creeps me out. And when I get invited to it, I tell people why. I don't just say, oh, no, I'm busy. I go, I don't go to that. I don't think it's right.

I don't think it's right. I think that's very funny to give an answer. Like, not I'm busy, not, no, thank you. You shouldn't go either. Hey, I'm judging you. I don't do this. I'm not judging you, but I'm just saying what I'm comfortable with my spirit doing. I always give an answer.

I don't like to do a just like, oh, so sorry, I can't make it. I feel like I tend to give a too honest answer because I want people to know where I stand on things. Yes, and they won't ask again. I got it. That's true. And if I like so, I want to be like, oh, I would like to do that. I just have to, you know, go to the dentist this week or whatever. But I just have to go to the dentist this week.

Like, I can't do it because I have to go to the dentist. As opposed to I'm not going because I don't believe in it. I think it's important to have a distinction. I think so. I don't know. Do you guys gloss over when you, or do you tell too much of the truth? I would like more information from you sometimes. Because sometimes you'll be like, I'm not available.

I'm like, I'm not the press. Like, let me, what are you doing? I'm not the press. She's not available for comment. She will not be arriving. What are you doing? Just say what you're doing. Sorry, I can't go.

I'm going to dinner. I can't be there. I'm out of town. I'm not available. All right. I'd also like to know when Sashir checks your avails. I didn't realize I was doing that. I thought I was saying what I was doing.

Sometimes, but sometimes, like, no, I'm not available. Or I have a heart out. What are you doing? Tell me. I'm your friend. Oh, good Lord. I'm so sorry. I simply didn't realize I was doing that. Yeah. Sometimes you'll say like, I have to be in Pittsburgh. And it takes everything in me to not be like, what's in Pittsburgh? What are you doing? What are you doing in there? Usually it's a show. What are you doing over there?

You know, just doing the he-he-hawas. I would like, I think, are you like me where I want too much information? I want details. I want what you're wearing. I want what you're nervous about. I want the What you're nervous about? Yeah. Like, oh, I'm going to Pittsburgh. Not sure what kind of cuisine they got there. I don't know. I just don't know what I'm going to be eating when I land. I want too much.

I want too much info from my friend. I chronically tell people not enough information all the time. I'm not. There's something in me where I just, I don't know how to. Yeah. Yeah. I got the too much information for I'd be telling people too much. I'm like, I won't go to the cemetery because I think that it's,

I think it's against God or something. And then, so I feel like we need to also time to share that. Switch that quality. Maybe you think that, like you have it in your head and you think it's already come out. Maybe. Yeah, maybe. I think when I say a thing, I'm like, oh, you can fill in the blanks. That's enough info.

That's enough info. Yeah, you got it. Yeah. But I guess it would be helpful to just let people know things. Mm-hmm. I don't know. Do you share location? Yes.

Mm-hmm. I share that with one of our other friends, my friend, Steph, who I've known since we were 12. And she's one of the only people I share a location with. And I think it also helps her because she'll just be like, I see that you're in Morocco. I have a quick question. When did you decide to go to Morocco? It's a baseline as opposed to her always having to start with like, where are you now? What's going on?

That's helpful. Yeah, I think it cuts down on questions. My mom also has my location, and she can feel when I'm traveling. Like, she can just like sense, like, are you on a plane right now? Or like, are you going somewhere? Where are you going? And I'm like, I am, actually. Whoa.

And this is before I shared my location. And then she was like, can you just give me your location? And then I did. And she's like, oh, I see you're on your way to Mexico. Have fun. Like, great. Moms love to feel like they're in the CIA a little bit. they love to just already know a thing

but yeah it cuts down like where are you what are you doing yeah who are you with why are you going there work or pleasure mm-hmm worker pleasure is always so strange I don't like you know when you like leave the country and they're like are you here on business or pleasure and I'm like yeah pleasure

pleasure just seems insane pleasure I questions like that that seem archaic and insane because I'm sure they served some purpose back of the day when it was like we just need to know if we need to install a fax machine in your room. I feel like now, like, no one needs to know that info at a Hyatt. Like, my phone does everything. You don't need to know what I'm here for. I'm here to see the circus or I'm here to build a museum. It's none of your business. I like that those are the

two options. Build a circus or go to the museum. Or wait, what did you say? Build a museum or go to the circus. Classic pleasure. Classic pleasure. What do you guys do for fun? I definitely see circuses for pleasure. Have you ever seen the universe? Have you ever seen the Soul Circus? No. Wait, is this black people? Is this black Shen Yun? Doesn't start on time.

Well, we didn't we didn't even need to ask that. But it was fun, and it was long. Is it aerial like silks and is it like black Shen Yun? I saw it when I was a kid. Okay.

I saw it when I was a kid. The only thing I remember was the ring leader, ringmaster. He had a lot of energy. You got to. And I just remember being like, whoa.

Does he sleep? through the night? I always think about that. Like people who have like like Kevin Hart. I'm like, does he like reboot at night? Like does he shut off? Or does he have to like sit and like decompress for hours before he can go to bed? He is so much energy.

No, I mean, I did a show with him a few years ago and he sleeps like four hours a night and he like records this podcast on the lunch break while we're filming. And in the morning he's working out in the evening. he's doing other business shit. Like, he just never stops. That's always business for him. Always business. He's never at the circus.

Never at that circus. Tani, I have a question about friendship. Do you remember your absolute first best friend? Oh, maybe. Gosh, maybe my first best friend was named Griselle in elementary school. I don't remember her last name. I think it was in first grade or maybe kindergarten And I just remember

She was like so pretty She was in like a pink dress And I just remember we would giggle all the time And like run around at recess And I remember she had very nice like gold jewelry on And I remember as a child I was like Wow we're allowed to wear like pretty jewelry Like grownups

It's almost like she felt like a grownup Her mom had her outfits laid Oh that's fun That is impressive I feel like I wouldn't trust a child to take care of jewelry. It probably wasn't real jewelry. You know, in my mind, I probably, it was probably just like something sparkly,

and I thought it was very, very fancy. Jewels. I thought it was Van Clef. Clef. Who that? Do you know? You know? I don't.

Van Cleef? Clef? Heathcliff? It's a clover. It's like necklaces with weird clovers. And for some reason, it's so expensive. Is it pure gold? I don't know, but it doesn't seem like there's any diamonds or anything in there.

Is it just for Irish Americans to wear? I think everyone can wear it. Are you sure they're allowed? I think it's for everybody. Interesting. Yeah, I think as long as you got the cash, you could do it. Lisa, do you remember your absolute first best friend? I don't think we've ever talked about that.

I don't think we've talked about that either. Yeah, I do. Lauren White, and we met in first grade at a Christian school. And we were called the chatter boxes because we would chat so much. And I was a military brat, so we moved after second grade, and we tried to be pen pals and, like, stay in touch, which we did a pretty good job of for years and just, like, you know, hand-wrote letters to each other. I don't even know of what. Like, I have no idea what updates an elementary school kid would have. You learned another letter?

No letter. We made it to M. Each grade, you get to another letter? I'm just impressed Your friendship had like a little branding Like a little name The Chatterboxes But they said it as like

A bad thing Like you guys were in the chatterboxes We were like Yeah we are Even better Oh you guys had a hook You had a vibe Bad girl

Yeah Walking across the playground Everyone's like Look at them The chatter boxes Cauty little chatter boxes And you're just like No one can stop us

No one can do each other Is chatting Do you ever be yours Yes There was Daniel Prospero She had an above ground pool And she really liked horses And then there was Stephanie Hoffman who had an in-ground pool

Whoa You're like where are people who have pools Who has a pool Yeah I feel like those are my very very very first ones And then Stephanie went somewhere Does she move? No she went to a different school And then I think that like kind of killed our friendship

Oh. That'll do it. No more access to the pool. Yeah. I had to go to the above-grown pool. Oh, my gosh. Oh, boy. But also, I had other things in common with them. I just remember that distinctly because I didn't have a pool growing up.

Because my mother was punishing me. That's why you didn't have a pool? She was, yes. You could get a pool, but you're not going to get one. She's like, actually, when we bought this house, there was one there. I filled it in with cement. Well, she said to me once, she said, do you want a pool? And I said, more than anything.

And then she was like, maybe we'll think about getting a pool. And I was so excited for like a couple of days. And then she goes, we're not getting a pool. And I said, why? And she said, the rules would be you can't swim alone. But I know you, you'd bring your stuffed animals outside and go, I'm not alone. And I said, you got me there because she was absolutely right. I mean, for her, first of all, that's, she knew her daughter well.

She told me there was nothing I could do that was originally. Oh my god That she would She would always know What I was up to her I was Wow How you say a little difficult

I would like do things And I think what I would do things She'd be like I'm not surprised So I would stop trying to do it Oh she was like this isn't novel This is an original I've seen this before Everything I have eyes everywhere

My dad was the same way is very like, I see everything. I know your every move. I've thought thoughts before you even knew they could be thoughts. Yep. So don't try it. Yep. That was my mother.

And I'd be like, I'm still going to try it. I'm going to do it. Yeah. Did you ever outsmarter even once? No. Damn. No, not at all. You don't want to be a predictable gift giver.

People are tired of candles. and bath bombs, you should get somebody a gift that really helps them relive the good times and remind them of you. That's why you should get aura frames. Orra frames are such a good gift because it's a frame that you get to choose what pictures go into it. Use an app on your phone and you can have it rotate as much as you want and it's nice to have like a little surprise memory pop up in your day. I have so many photos of Nicole on my phone. One in particular that makes me laugh is one time we went to a restaurant and there were some particularly big spoons there and she got emotional looking at them so I have a picture of her holding these big spoons with

tears in her eyes and I know if that picture pops up onto this frame in my home and I see it I'm going to have a good laugh and that laugh is going to make me have a good day so I feel like aura frames is a nice laughter booster throughout your day if you want upload unlimited photos and videos, just download the ORA app and stay connected to Wi-Fi, no hidden fees. Share photos and videos effortlessly straight from your phone all year round. Named number one by wirecutter, you can save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com. For a limited time, listeners can get $20 off their best-selling Carver mat frame with code best friends. That's A-U-R-A-Frames.com promo code best friends support the show by mentioning us at checkout terms and conditions apply tony

me do you have a favorite memory of an experience that solidified your friendship with someone whoa there was a lot of nouns memory yeah me you you got a favorite memory of an experience that solidified your friendship with someone someone Yeah. I sure do. Let me think on it. I didn't read the end of it. Into a best friendship.

Oh, shit. Okay, well, wait. Hey, that narrows it down. That narrows it down. Let's see. Solified it into a best friendship. I mean, okay, so my one of my best friends, Bethany Thomas, who you guys have met, we have been close for like 15, 16 years or something like that.

We met in Chicago, and we met doing a play. And she was like this very well-known. She still is this incredible theater artist. She makes a living doing theater, which I'm like... Which is really fucking hard. Yes. So hats off to her. She's got the biggest voice in the country.

She's incredible. And so we met because we were cast to play opposite each other in this play called The Life by Cy Coleman, which was a 70s musical about sex workers who were just trying to make it off the streets. And so we were set to play best friends. And she also was like the epitome of very, like indie Chicago cool she was in a couple of bands she like did she just did all kinds of weird cool artsy shit and everyone knew Bethany and I was kind of newly out of college and like

not many people knew me yet and so I went up to her at a house party and it was like everything you picture of like early aughts house party it's just like solo cups and MGMT blasting in the background and like and everybody's vibing and I go up to her and I'm like hey I'm tony knew some were cast together in a play and she was like oh okay cool yeah um so like you're an actor what else do you do and i go oh well like you i'm also in a band and like a movie she just goes who doesn't have a band these days and turned away and i was like you're you're so cool i'm nothing we became very good friends and anytime i've told her that story she's like i said that And everyone else around her is like, that sounds like you.

Yes. It definitely does. Did it take warming up or like was your next interaction much better than that one? I feel like, so the thing about Bethany is that isn't even like a bad interaction. Like she says shit like that and means no harm or like disrespect. She's just like, fuck, everybody's in a fucking band. It's 2010. Everybody thinks they're blonde redhead right now.

Anyway, do you want to go to the bar with me? Yeah. So it was already very familiar and. warm. And I feel like once we started rehearsals, she was also very, I love Bethany, because the second you proved to her, you're not an idiot or you're talented, if she has to work with you, she's like, okay, I like you. So, you know, we got into rehearsals and we started singing and she was like, great, you're not terrible. That's a fun way to walk through life. Everyone's terrible until they're not. Everyone's guilty until proven innocent. Let me not. I mean, she will

hear this. And let me not label her exactly like that. But she just has a very strong sense of like self and her talent enters a room almost before she does because everybody in that community knows her and like loves her. And so I feel like there's a very like, okay, come to my level as people fucking should. Yeah, definitely. So she is wonderful. And I will say the very first time I met her, I was like, wait, have I met her before? But I hadn't. She is very familiar and she like makes you feel at home with her. Yeah. Because she is very self-assured. And that's always a fun person to meet. Especially when she meets, like, because you like her, like your fellow pros, but in completely different fields.

And so I think she's also very good at like, she's non-competitive, but like, you know, she just like, she likes a fellow pro. I feel like too often as women, sometimes we're like, I don't know, just forced to kind of pretend that other people have worked as hard as us and have as much talent as we do. And we just kind of have to be like, yeah, no, we're peers. Uh-huh. Sure. So it's nice when you don't have to do that. Wait, you sing. I know this.

Yeah. But you also play the drums. You know that from doing drugs at my house. Yeah. But did the singing come first or the drumming come first? It's the singing came first. Because I started it when I was like a kid trying to do like music theatery shit. And then I quickly realized I was not like a Bethany.

Thomas type and didn't have a great musical theater voice. So I joined a bunch of bands, did a bunch of rock music. And then being in those bands, I was like, I want to learn to play all this stuff a little bit. So I kind of like, learn to play guitar. I suck. Learn to play bass. I suck a little less. Learn to play drums. I was like, I'm mediocre. So that's the one that kind of stuck. And I will say, it's okay to be mediocre at stuff. It's fun. I like being mediocre at several things. Like, I'm not a great sewer, but I know I can take out my sewing machine and make

like a couple of things. Okay-ish. You know? You made actual clothing items. I would say that's pretty good. Hey, thank you. The inside's a mess. I mean, no one has to see that. You are right. Yeah. You also, you described to me

how to make a clothing item that I found really impressive. Because I was like, oh, you could make that. And you were like, yeah, you just boop, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo, bo. Yeah. But I will, it is mediocre. at its finest. It's hobbies. We're just, I, why do we live in this grind set in a fucking culture wherever, I'm not yelling at you, I'm yelling at the world, where everybody has to be like top of their fucking game

and it has to be content and we have to be like the best on TikTok doing the thing. Like back in the day, people just used to do needlepoint. I know. Motherfuckers was just putting flowers on a pillow for fun. Just for stress relief. The number of things I do to just keep my phone out of my hand, I'm like, We increase those, be bad at them. Who cares? I color every day. Oh, nice.

I do. Wait a minute. I might want to get into that. I love it. We can do that outside. Ah! We get color outside? Oh, my God.

I bought a coloring book on Amazon because I like the patterns that are really, really teeny because it's, like, more satisfying to fill in really teeny ones. And I like a gliding gel pen because it glides really nicely. And I bought one on Amazon. I think it's literally called Women's Ames. Anxiety coloring book. You know what? I said rude.

I love that. Because they were like, someone will be writing that in the search and I'm going to send them right to me. Anxiety coloring book specifically gendered. Four women. I love it. I wonder what the men's looks like. Trucks. Yeah.

Transformers. Deodorant. Boy, think. Deodorant. Hammers and nails. Spotty spray. Yeah. Wait.

Now I want a boy anxiety color. Me too. I want drugs. Big, big drag. Paul Thomas Anderson. It's just all Gettie images of PTA. That's really funny. PTA.

PTA. Paul Thomas Anderson. We just had this conversation over text. And I also had that conversation last night. I don't know why I cannot. It's because it stands for Parent Teacher Association. And I don't understand why all of my friends are saying it because none of them have children. It also stands for physical therapy.

I do want to see that movie, though. The PTA? Man, everyone's got to stop. Everyone's got to stop. Just say the man's name. Well, we could also say the name of the movie. You called it. Leo is in a war all the time.

That's really funny. It's like every day's a fight, everybody. What's the name of it? Was it one battle after the other? I mean, I'm not far off. Lee was in a fight every day. I also want to see him. That's a much easier movie for me to say.

Him, yeah. That is a lot easier. Have you seen it? No. Is it scary? That's what I'm concerned about. It looks really bloody. I don't do scaries.

Same. Oh, you don't do scary? But you did sinners. Several times. I'll do black people. him is black people okay then i'll see it him is jordan peel produced see i needed more context and then marlin wane's in okay and then other people okay got it i rescind my statement of not seeing it okay i want to now we'll figure it out great do you have a core memory that comes to mine when you talk

about friendship i don't know why your questions scare me they're like it's the way i say it yeah there's no segue I just look down and then say something. It's just that your energy shifts so hard that it's something I feel like I've applied for a loan and I'm not getting that. Like fuck, I guess I got a... Also the clipboard doesn't help. It's like so.

Yeah. I feel like you're reading me. I see you have friends. I allegedly, yes. You have friends. Two of them. Two of them are right here, I thought. Interesting.

Interesting that you think. A core memory that what? That makes me think of friendship? Do you have a core memory? memory that comes to mind when talking about friendship and what that means to you um your energy shifted i know because i think it's it feels weighty it feels like if i say the wrong thing i'll disappoint someone no there's no what's that about i don't know a core memory that makes me think about friendship i mean i love because i don't have siblings i feel like my whole life i've been like

trying to gather people with sibling energy to me because i love friends but i specifically really value those types of friends where it's like, we could be like in a weird little family and we don't even have to talk all the time, but I can call you crying if I need to. And so I think I have that with weird people through doing stuff with Star Trek because Star Trek is such a intense family community. It's not just like you're in a cast of a show. It's like you end up in so many weird scenarios and like conventions and stuff and just out late with wild ass people that it It feels like you build, yeah, you build these like familial bonds really quickly. So I probably have that with my castmate, Jack Quaid, who's a very like, he's like my brother.

It truly feels like, oh, I finally found like a little sibling. And the core memory I would name is us going to a club in Chicago during one of our first conventions. because I was like, I'm kind of from here and you haven't ever visited here and I need to take you around and like show you Chicago and so I took him to like four different bars and clubs

and it was all my like favorite haunts and I just remember this was like I think maybe the first season of the boys was out he was not the large star that he is now but he's still a very handsome affable man

and women in Chicago drunk women in Chicago were throwing themselves at him so thirstily and he was like not engaging did not know how to handle the attention. And I just remember becoming, like, his bodyguard

and having to, like, defend him from, like, wasted 50-year-old white women from disclaims. And I was just, like, wrenching him out of bars. And finally, I was like, Jack, you have to understand. You're, like, a Chicago 15 to just get used to it. And he was like, I don't want to get used to it. Can we go somewhere more chill? No.

So it's weird my core memories about my friend getting harassed all night. Sorry about that. But it did really bond us because I really. realize that, like, that protective energy I felt, I was like, oh, this, I feel this because he feels like a little brother. Yeah. That's sweet. That is sweet.

I think it's kind of a sweet story about harassment, right? About protection. Yeah. You're right. So Sheer protects me. We were once in a bar and this man was in my personal space. And I, for whatever reason, didn't know how to be like, get away from me. Yeah.

So I just kept, like, shrinking and shrinking and then I was like, help. And so she was like, hey, get away from me. You want a knuckle sandwich? Oh, you turned into an old-timey, like, little playground ball. I did you do a Y-I-I-A-A-A-Y-A-I-A? Yeah. I just turned my little paperboy hat. Did you wind up like this before you punched?

He's like, this is too weird. I'm just going to leave. Yeah, he was like in your neck. Like his whole head was right here. And I was like, what are you doing? Yes. And I was like, nah. Oh, God. I do. Wait, but Nicole, are you not good at telling a weirdo to fuck off in a bar? You seem like you would be.

I am. Sometimes. Just not in that moment. In that moment, I don't know why. I was like, I can't. Yeah. My fight, what is it? Fight, flight. Freeze. Yeah. It varies. Yeah. Greatly. My, like, fight instinct is very, the threshold's low.

Yeah. Like, very small things can happen. And I'm like, oh, Kelly. you and then like someone will wrap their whole body around me that I don't know and I'll be like well can't move well I clearly deserve this in some way they must really need this they need a hug they need a hug with their calves I don't walk my car door and someone opened my door and took some stuff and then I wanted my tote bag back and I was like maybe they'll come back so I wrote a note and I was like hey can I my tote bag back here's $20 I don't

know what that response is that that's not fight flight or freeze what is that what is that response there's also a fawn but i don't know if that's under that umbrella no it's just i'm an anomaly i'm proving my mother wrong every day you are unpredictable yeah your mom didn't see that coming i win did they bring it back what my mom bag oh also it it's be a magic it Imagine me calling your mom it. And they. Wait, they. I don't know.

Did they find a way to bring it back? I don't know. I was like, no, she still did. Okay, well, science is progressing every day. I thought maybe her life. I don't know. I don't know why I thought that. No, they never brought my tote bag back.

But there's still $20 in my car in case someone else opens the door and needs it. Well, now they're just going to take that. And then you're going to write a note that says, please bring my $20 back. There's a tote bag. They can have the $20. I want them to leave my basketball. and my stripper shoes alone because they took my stripper shoes, my pleasers.

Oh. And those can be hard to fit. I will say, they were broken. The heel was coming off. So they didn't get very good things. Yeah. Maybe they were on a scavenger hut. And they were like, broken pleasers.

Oh, it's on the map. Whoa. Yes. I went to a punk show last night, and my boyfriend Brandon, like, we were in the pit. Guys, I was in a mosh pit for the first time in like 15 years. It was very fun.

Isn't that, like, people punching? Nobody punched. This was an age-appropriate pit. Nice. I don't think I'd go to a pit for a show where everyone's, like, 19. You can't go get in a mosh pit where most of the attendees

at the concert are still on their parents' insurance. You need to go where everybody cares about their knees and their joints. The bones are butter now. Yeah, I go where people are... Not a mosh pit. It's just a churn. Yeah. People are concerned about bone density in this pit.

We saw the band Pup, and it was like... Everybody was like 30, 35 plus. So I was like, great. But he turned to me and he was like, somebody stole my wallet and, like, my earbuds. And I was like, no, this was such good vibes. That sucked. But then he found his earbuds on the floor, smashed a shit. And then he found his wallet.

It lost him found. Oh, my God. Oh, that's nice. So he had just left his bag open. Oh. Which is annoying. But it was like, I was like, oh, I like the vibes of this place. He lost your wallet in a mosh pit and somebody turned it in.

Thank goodness. That is nice. Community. That is, yes, community. Fellowship. I once lost my wallet and then I was like, oh, I think I left it in my car. And then I was like, oh, no, my car is open. So then I had to go back to my car. Wasn't in my car. But then I just looked further in my purse. It was just in a pocket that I didn't look in. The number of times I'm like, I've been robbed and the perpetrator was OtherPers. Yeah, that happens a lot. She got to go to jail. Yeah. Other purse has stolen a lot of things. The other person has stolen so much. I saw Mosh Pit at my Chemical Romance and it was like mostly women and it was like, I was like, I was like, that's so cool. Like I, you know, I don't know how many other opportunities there are for like women to feel like comfortable and safe in a in a pit situation. And then they were like doing like little like dances together and like lowering themselves to the ground and then like raising up at the same time. And I was like, they're having so much fun.

That's nice. I love that. I did feel a need being of protective energy. I, as a woman of size and like now, because I've been in the gym, I feel very strong. A woman of size is really funny because it reminds me of Southwest's passenger of size policy. Oh, is that what they call it? No. Yes, passenger of size.

I don't like passenger of size. A woman of size. Well, gosh, Southwest, you got to get different terms. Well, they have abolished it and they're now making the fatties pay for two seats. Can you believe? they used to be heroes and now they switched to the villain oh that's good that's better

it was really good it was quick I just rhymes I was trying in the pit I was trying to protect the girlies there were lots of little girlies in there just going crazy but then like it would start to close in there all these big dudes so I was like

trying to use my body they didn't ask for this help but I felt like I want to try and like help these ladies not fall down a tiny lady dancing and you look up in a woman of size of protecting you. With a force field around you. And I just shout, I've been

working out. Don't worry, this is replacing my leg day. My bones are so strong. They'll never be butter. Just the most insufferable person. I think as we all march towards menopause, I'm just going to find ways to be more and more insufferable

as long as it promotes health. I love that. I will say, live music. Like, when I go, I usually dance for the whole time. I'm so sore the next day. It really is a workout. So this same week, I also went to LCD sound system. Oh.

And we danced so hard. I got like 25,000 steps that day. Wow. I was like, this was the best. Yeah. It was such a fun show. I remember I got like, because they say you're supposed to get 10,000 steps. And one of my highest days, it was like 15,000 steps.

steps but I'd been at the airport and the auto show and I've talked about this before so that's what I got to do every goddamn day you got to get to go to the airport go to the auto show yeah unfortunately that's crazy unfortunately current guidelines suggest everyday airport to take a flight for help but I was like I walked so much that day I was like how do you do that in real life yeah well do you know about the movement snacks excuse me what the fuck are you talking about once again everyone I'm sorry I'm not sorry The movement snack. This part of my personality sucks so bad.

I learned so much. I want everyone listening who's like ready to throw their phone into the scene. I want you to know you're right, but I'm not going to change. So the movement snacks, so they've done a bunch of studies where in addition to, so not like to replace the 10,000 steps, but they're saying like another way to get similar benefits from movement is to break up your day with like little short bursts of movement. They can be as little as like two minutes long. So you can just like stand up and do 10 squats or you can. do like a few lunges or you can like do little like chair pushups and if you do that like six to ten times during the day it can give you as many of the health benefits again do your

research i'm not a scientist but it can give you a lot of benefits like walking can i was really hoping that movement snacks is going to be you place different snacks around the house and you go get them you said i would like something to negate working out no it's working you're moving to get it what kind of snacks i guess if you're choosing I guess you could hide apples somewhere Would you accept like a carrot dangled in front of you Like a horse Like a cartoon horse walking on treadmill?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I got to get it. I feel like I'm closer, but I'm not. Maybe I'll hide my persimmons around the house. Well, that's a dangerous game because if you forget Yeah, you're right. My neighbor has Japanese persimmons that I've been stealing.

Oh, leaning over the fence. Why didn't you ask her for some? Hey, you know what? Look, everybody's different. Some people watch movies in the cemetery. Some people steal persimits. I'm not here to judge. The thought never occurred to me.

What am I supposed to knock on their door and be like, can I have your persimmons? Yes. Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. Why have you just been taking them like fucking Oliver Twist? Because the thought of knocking on their door being like, can I have your fruit is great? That's wild. That's truly so wild.

Wait, but no, isn't it normal to be like, hey, you have a fruit tree? Do you have something to exchange? No. I have nothing. My harvests are one tomato at a time. A cherry tomato. So you want me to go over there with three little cherry tomatoes and say, can I have your big fruit? You can offer tickets to a show?

What if they don't like me? Look, I haven't thought this through, all right? I would love to live in a world where you could knock on a neighbor's door and ask, hey, can I? Because most of the time, I think what I'm thinking is most people have a fruit tree. They have more fruit than they can handle. So they're usually trying to give that shit away. Yeah. I wish someone would ask for my olives.

No one ever wants my olives. Really? Yeah. So let's roll play this. Okay. You're a woman, you've got fruit or olives, and you want them, and you don't know each other. Ding dong. Oh, hello.

Hi, I'm Stacy. I'm Natalie. Hello, Natalie. Can I get your fruit? Oh, I live next door. Oh. And I saw that you have olives. I do have olives.

Can I have them? You absolutely can have my olives I have way too many I don't know what to do with them Please take them So how does this go Will you go make a bag or something Or do I go in your backyard

I guess I personally don't want to deal with it So you're welcome to go pick them if you want And can I come in anytime I want to your backyard I would like to know when you're coming in See I feel insane When you took it to a place I did come anytime First you want me to do work

Are you going to bag them then you wanted to trespass on my property when I'm not here. Yeah, she's not the store, first of all. But it started really good. It did start really good. Well, should I, well, I don't know. Do I wait here and you go bag them?

Or like, are you going to let me in? I don't, it seems. You are leaning over the fence, so it seems like it's in the front of the house, right? It's on the side of the house. Okay. I guess you just have to go in the gate? I don't know.

Okay. And I don't know how to get to their front door. I don't know if their gate opens. You can't even get to the front door from the street? You can. There's a gate, but I don't know if it's like locked. Just keep stealing them. Maybe there's a doorbell by the gate. Oh, maybe. I didn't even think of that.

You said keep stealing. I heard that. Just keep stealing them. I realize this has caused too much. It got complicated. Yeah. I thought this was going to be easy and normal. It wasn't. No.

Just steal them. And if she calls you out on it, just be like, what do you want me to do? Burst in your house? What do you want me do? Burst in your house. rob your house and then make you do work burst in your house i don't know where the doorbell is i don't know i'm not to get in here just get combative yeah i'll hit her yeah throw the persimmons at her but have you had a japanese persimmon i have oh they're nice they're really good they're so sweet um

my friend andrew says that they are the perfect dessert but he says that when people are like what should we have for dessert is there cake is there and he goes you know it's a perfect dessert just one ripe persimmon i'm sure they love that everybody hates it everybody hates it. I also don't know if mine are ripe. Oh, right, because you're just snatching them. Yes. Are they hard? It's persimmons season right now, so chances that they're ripe are. Are they hard? They shouldn't be too hard, no. I think also if they come off the tree easily, that means they're ready. Yeah. I'd be pulling. I should show you the picture because a lot of them still have tons of leaves.

Is it branch in your hand? Yeah. Are they good when you bite into them? They're very sweet, and I really like that. It's probably good. You're fine. But they are, it's like a, it's like a, like a, maybe a harder apple. One thing I know about fruit, and it's not much, fruit tells you when it's not ready for you. Fruit's going to let your mouth know. Fruit's going to let you know. I don't even know why.

You are right. I don't know why I said it like that. I like that. I like going to let you know. Because you'll bid into a fruit and the fruit's like, not right yet. Or it will be like, you waited too long. And that happened with a watermelon. and I grew three or four years ago. Yeah.

I was, I was, I thought size mattered and it doesn't with watermelons. You got to thwap it. Well, I watched a video and that's not even it. When a watermelon is growing on the vine, there's like little, it looks like a pig's tail. Oh, the little curly cue, yeah. Yeah. The curly cues next to, on either side of it, when they're brown, it's ready. Okay.

And I followed that with mine, and I didn't wait for it to get huge, and it was misshaping. I posted it. People were like, that's a squash. And I was like, wait till they see it cut open. And I opened it and it was this like lovely shade of like reddish pink. And then it was so fucking sweet. And yeah, you got to wait for the little pigs. Okay. And get brown. And little piggyies to get brown. You got to wait for them little piggy's to get brown. That's when you know your watermelon's ready. You know what they say. Watermelons ready when the pigies get brown. I think, okay, I think I saw your watermelons. Melon on your stories or on your Instagram maybe.

Do you guys have this thing where when your friends have a podcast, we have to talk more about the social, parisocial relationship where you know your friends in real life. But if you listen to them too much, then you know things they didn't tell you. Yeah. So like, I can't listen to this show. I can't ever because then I'll, because when we go to lunch or something, we want to be like, hey, how's your week been, blah, blah, blah. I don't want to be like, I saw you got a pizza stone.

Like, I don't want to just launch in with info that was. I saw you got a pizza stone. But even if you did, we just give you more information about it. I guess, but it feels strange now. I do get that. Do you run into this with other people have shows? I don't listen to other people. I don't listen to podcasts at all, so I don't have that issue.

But I did have that issue with my sister where we would be, I would like go see her. We'd be in the car and we'd be talking. And she would say something that I definitely. didn't tell her and I'd be like wait what and I took a couple of visits before I was like oh are you like listening to my podcast and she was like yes and I was like ah don't yeah that's what I say to people I'm like gross don't do that yeah I also have the issue with family and I have to be like you do have to check in on me like you also have to ask me questions I was like call me yeah because she she was like I like hearing your voice and I was like yes but you have the

you have the main line yeah yeah you can get a live podcast direct to your that you could respond to. And then you can even ask personal questions. It's an interactive podcast. Catered to you. When I send people voice notes that get a little too long, I do call them personal pan podcasts. I like them.

I love a voice note. That's fun. Because you can listen to it while you're doing stuff and you're like, oh, that's my friend telling me gossip. Well, I think we're nearing the end. Okay. Do you want to tell people where to find you? Oh. I'm going to see.

I'll be roaming the streets, I'm sure, this fall. This fall, coming to the streets, tawny newsome. She's been in these streets. Y'all get there. Time for you to meet me there. You can't, I've just been writing a lot. I've been working so much for Star Trek. What do I have to tell you all?

Starfleet Academy, the show I was writing for, comes out in the beginning of 2026. Nice. That's fun. Do you have any conventions coming up? Oh, my gosh. I have these Star Trek crews coming up. Oh, yes. Yes.

It's a cruise full of freaks And I love it so much I love it so much In February Okay Buy tickets to that Oh and I started doing God I'm just like

All Trek I started taking My friend Andrew Who I've done podcasts With for years I started taking him Through like sampler platter Of Star Trek episodes

So we're just kind of cherry picking From different series So right now we're going through all the pilots And that you can subscribe to On Suboptimal Pods That's my little subscription site So, yeah. Hell yeah, dude.

Hell yeah. Well, Tani, thank you for taking the time out. Thank you. Come on over. Come on over, baby. I appreciate it. And I appreciate that you both dressed alike but didn't share it with me so that I could match you. It's very funny.

I don't feel ganged up on or left out at all. When I walked in, you were like, oh, you guys dressed up the same. And then I responded, well, she dressed like me. And then everyone was like, wow. I said, hey, you didn't have to start with that energy. We were having a nice time And I was like, oh, okay Wow

Because I'm always in a striped shirt I should have just been nice It's okay, it's nice now Here, I'll say this You did get the memo Look at them socks Boom bitch Oh yeah, striped socks

There we go Boom Okay goodbye That was a hitgum What's going on It's Lamorne Morris And Hannah Simone And we host The Mess Around, a New Girl rewatch podcast now on HeadGum.

Now, here's the thing. Every single week, we chat about an episode of New Girl, and we really get into it. Like, we get up in there. We get up in there. You know, we reminisce about our time's on set. We share behind the scenes tea. We react to rewatching episodes that we haven't seen in years. We talk about how Jake Johnson is dog.

That's not true. We talk about so many memories we have of working with the biggest stars on the plan. it. I'm talking Prince, Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodriguez. We're just two BFFs having a good old time, okay? Sometimes we even talk to other co-stars like Zoe Day Chanel, Jake Johnson,

Max Greenfield, and Damon Wayne's Jr. And your dad. We talk to your dad on this show as well. Make sure you subscribe to the mess around wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes drop every single Tuesday.