Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata - Sasheer Waited For The Sunrise

Episode Date: May 6, 2026

Nicole and Sasheer have two differences of opinion this episode: one about egg puns, and the other about the funniness of a really specific part of Big Daddy. But that’s okay! They also get into being called sir at the airport, Nicole’s recent sewing party, David Blaine’s magic tricks, and the struggle of buying the right hair clippers. QUIZ LINK: What % Unicorn Are You?Watch this full video on YouTube and follow below!Follow Nicole: Twitter, Instagram, TikTokFollow Sasheer: Instagram, TikTokLike the show? Rate Best Friends 5 stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts!Have a friendship question for Nicole and Sasheer to solve? Leave us a voicemail at [phone]‬ or write in at [e-mail] Friends is a production of Headgum Studios. Our producer is Allie Kahan. Our executive producer is Anya Kanevskaya. The show is edited, mixed, and engineered by Richelle Chen.This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Best Friends via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. Hello, Cushear. Hello, Nicole. Oh, what's that you got in your hand? Oh, it is a reusable insulated cup from the Langham Hotel in Chicago. Oh, is that a hotel that you enjoy? I love the Langham Hotel in Chicago. Boy, oh boy, do I love it.

Yeah. I'm trying to become a hotel influencer. What that means, I don't exactly know. I just want the Langham Hotel to know how much I love them. And how much I want them to let me stay there for free. Yeah. And how much I want upgrades. I feel like that is a hotel influencer.

You stay there for free and then you talk about it and like show it off. But you always have, you had a great time there. We were, girl. That's a bad idea. Trying to balance it out on the mic. That actually is a really cute cup. It's stunning. It's really cute.

It's a beautiful shade of pink, not too pinky. Yeah. But not too pale. Yeah. It's really classic. Classic. And the manager there gifted me that, which is really, really nice. It's the start of me becoming a Langham Chicago hotel influencer. She also gifted me the smell of the hotel.

That's right. I love it. I can't find it anywhere to buy online. I don't know if they sell it to be shipped to me. Oh, interesting. No, but they sell in the gift shop, no? They do. Maybe you just have to be there physically to get it.

Which I love. Yeah. How dare you try to pretend that you're at the Langham without actually being at the Langham? Don't be a poser. Don't be. That's a good word that should come back. Poser. Fucking poser.

No, this is for Langham exclusive guests. Yes. And that's what I am when I go to Chicago. A Langham Hotel exclusive guest. I really did enjoy it. We stay, me and Mateo stay at the Langham when you were shooting your special. Your company special. It was so good.

Thank you. And yeah, the lango's really cute. Isn't it beautiful? Yeah. Oh, my word. I just, I love it so much. I didn't get to go to the spa, but the spa seems to be explosive. Explosive.

As a swag thing, I want to say it was like swag from the MTV Awards or something. It was like years and years ago. One of the things was like two nights at the lame hotel. I think in L.A. In Pasadena. In Pasadena, yeah. But I had no reason to come here, so I wasn't able to use it. That's deeply unfortunate.

I know. Boy, oh, boy. I think I also have one and didn't use it. Because I didn't realize how incredible the Langham Hotel is. That's the destination. It really is. I just love it so much. Yeah.

I'll never forget. The first time I stayed there, I think I was doing Steve Harveston. The Steve Harvey Show. And the Steve Harvey show spares, or spared no expense. I went there twice. And the first time they put me up in the four seasons, like on the top floor in this, like, stunning sweet, it was so high up that when it winded, when the wind blew, oh my God. When it winded, when the, I love hotels so much.

I like can't gather my thoughts. Yeah, you're losing your world. I love hotels. When it was windy, I could feel it. Like the building was shaking. I was like, this is crazy. And then the second time I went, they let me stay at the Langham. I was in just the most opulent of sweets.

Yeah. It was so, and the bed was so comfortable. I love it there. I've never loved a hotel more. Everyone at the front desk was my best friend. You're having a great time. I don't think, I've been in a lot of hotels. But my memory for hotels is really bad.

Like, they all kind of blend in my... I can remember the really bad ones. And I have some really great ones, but I'm not, like, remembering them so much where it's like, I gotta go back. Oh. Yeah. I am brand loyal. The Gramercy Park Hotel before it closed, I was friends with the dormant. Oh, I remember this, yes.

I believe his name was Carlos. Oh, I might be getting that wrong. We're still friends on Instagram. Oh. But I love to... just like hanging out with him. I would go sit in Grand Marcy Park. Yeah. A gated park. You have to have a key. You have to have a key. If you're a hotel guest, you get the key, but there's only so many keys. So like the whole hotel can't go down.

It's still exclusive. Isn't it funny that there's an exclusive park? Yeah. But I loved being inside. People walk and pass looking in. Get out of here. Don't you wish you could be behind these gates? Get out of here. But the Grand Marcy Park, I would always stay in. He took me to see the suite that like Beyonce and Obama would stay in. Like, I mean, I make friends at hotels. You love a hotel. Yes. And then there's another hotel.

I think it's yours truly in D.C. Love. Love. They're my friends. Love them. I'm so glad. I can't believe you don't have any hotel friends. But can't you, that's not crazy.

No, what I'm saying is normal. I cannot believe you don't have hotel friends. But, like, me, I'm not, like, chopping it up with customer service. I know. I'm not rude. I just, like, I want to go to my room immediately. And I want, how can we limit this interaction, like, make this as fast as possible so I can move on with my life? Not me.

When I checked in at the langum, truly, another lady came over because we were having so much fun. The three of us were just like, ha, ha, ha, ha. And then this other man checking in, he was trying to be fun. And I wanted to be like, don't do that. I'm having fun. You're not fun. I can't remember the joke he said. It was really stupid.

Kick him out. Kick him out. Get to the Hilton. That's so funny. And the Langham, I believe, is not owned by a larger corporation. I think it's owned by Langham proper. I like that. Most are.

I feel like most hotels belong to a Hilton or a Marriott or something like that. And I wonder why that is. I don't know. They'll be like, here's our portfolio, the red roof in, the comfort suite. Like, and I'm just like, why? Are you tricking me by naming them different? Why aren't they just all called like Hilton 1, Hilton 2? I guess different price points, but maybe you wouldn't like go to a Hilton if you knew it was connected to a red roof in or something.

Hmm. I don't know. That's it. Allie, I don't know how you'd even Google this. Why do... Why are hotels under the umbrella of a big hotel have different names? Nope, that's a bad Google. But I think you get what I'm trying to say, right?

Why are hotels named differently in the hotel group? I think that was a very nice, succinct Google. Yeah, yeah. That was nice. Thanks. I'm terrible at Googling. Okay, they might be under the same parent umbrella, but use different names to target specific markets, price points, and customer experiences.

So, yeah, that's, like, why business luxury budget bookings. Mm-hmm. Those types. Oh, okay. So, sure, you were on it. I think so. Yeah, I think it's, like, in both directions. Like, if you are looking for a more reasonably priced hotel, you might be like, well, I can't afford a Hilton.

Let me look at the cheap option, not knowing they're under the same umbrella. Interesting. I actually don't know if these two are even under the same umbrella. I just keep using the same two. I like that you keep using the same too. They probably are. The Hilton sues you. They're like, that's not part of our collection.

Actually, didn't they do something cool recently? I feel like they're like, yeah, I feel like they like canceled a bunch of rooms that ICE was supposed to be in. I think that was one hotel and then I think the brand does a lot. the whole was like that, don't do that. I actually don't know the ins and outs of it. So I actually shouldn't be commenting on it. Well, then let's forget it. Set it and forget it.

Do you know what that's from? Is it at Crockpot? The Showtime Rotisserie Grill. Yes, I do remember this now. You have should have made this commercial before. I have. And anytime I've shown you something and it's like taking me a while to like find it, I'm like, just wait for it, just wait for it.

It's never good enough. It's never as outstanding as I want it to be Do you know what I mean? Yeah, that's hard. And then sometimes I don't get like the response that like I think the things should get Like when I showed you from Big Daddy, hip hop, hip hop and octopus?

Yeah. Man, I stomp my feet in the street. I remember. I think it's so funny. I just rewatched Big Daddy. And guess what? I laughed so hard at that part. I think, you know, sometimes we have different ideas of things that are really funny to us, and that's okay.

It is okay. That's what makes us different. Yeah. It's okay to be different. It's okay to be different. I feel like they're not teaching kids that anymore. Really? I don't know. How do you know what they're teaching kids?

I don't know, because whenever I, like, pass a high school and, like, schools out, they all. all dressed the same. But I feel like that's always. Is it? I feel like every generation there's a look. Because no one wants to be... I mean, I think there will be kids who want to be different, but like the norm, whatever the norm is is safe.

Because then you're not a target for bullying or whatever. So yeah, they all look the same. But also, some don't. Some probably don't. No, you're truly right. Because I started thinking and I was like, oh, yeah, Abercrue. Everyone wore Abercrombie. Mm-hmm.

And, like, tight flares with big shoes. Yeah. Yeah, there's always a look. Mm-hmm. Was that your look in high school? Or not yours personally, like, the look of your high school. The look of my high school. Yeah, it was definitely, like, flared jeans and, like, tight polo shirts.

Mm-hmm. And sometimes the double polo. Do you remember those? Yes. And whoever started that? Why? Like it couldn't have been comfortable. No.

You're wearing two shirts. Yes. They put one on and they're like, This needs a second one. Oh, do you remember the t-shirt with a long shirt underneath the t-shirt? Yes. Like, it shouldn't work, but somehow it did. It did.

It looked cute. Yeah. Do I bring it back? I mean, why not? Things are coming back. Things are coming back. Mm-hmm. But also, I don't dress to trends.

That's true. You dress to yourself. I march to my own little drummer beat. Mm-hmm. that's nice. Mm-hmm. I'm a little drummer boy. She's a little drawer boy.

Bar-pah-pum-pum-pum. Yeah, I will see people will be like, I found this really big belt, and now I'm just going to put it over a dress, and I'm like, oh, wow, that's coming back? That's funny. I think it is coming back. I think I saw some low-rise jeans, too.

Oh, no. And I was like, they got really low. They got so low. In a way that's unattainable. Because, you know, you see pictures of, like, Christina Aguilera in her, like, dirty phase where she was wearing, like, the lowest jeans. Do you think she could sit down in the car to arrive to the function? Or do you think she was standing in a van? She was probably sitting down.

Oh, I don't know. But, like, for the music video, probably sat down. But, like, everything was out anyway. So it's like, if her ass falls out, it falls out. Just pull them back up when you stand. If my ass falls out, it falls out. Because she definitely had a thong on. I remember that.

Mm-hmm. But how is that? I guess I don't have a body where that would work. Like aesthetically or like feeling like comfortable? Feeling comfortable. Yeah. Statically, I mean, whatever, I'll wear whatever I want. But I just don't, I can't fathom that ever being comfortable.

I don't know if it was comfortable for them either. I don't know. Interesting. I never dressed like that. But it doesn't look comfortable. You never wore like low-rise jeans. I really didn't. I think I wore mid-rise jeans.

I haven't seen very many pictures of your youth. I'll find some. I would like to see it. Yeah. She was just a dorky girl. I don't think I was dorky, but I also don't. I think I was just like, hey, I exist. But you had fun clothes, right?

Yes. Yeah. I did have fun clothes. You're like wearing tutu's and stuff. Oh, that was in my early 20s. Oh, okay. In high school. I wore a lot of flares, big shoes, very tight shirts.

I've always been like, if it stretches, it fits. Yeah. And my mother used to say, just because it stretches doesn't mean it fits. And I was like, I think you got it twisted. Yeah, yeah. I think you fucked it up. I think the saying is the opposite. Yeah.

Yeah, I think I wore what I wear less sweatshirts and jeans. Mm. And then like, I feel like. I feel like I wore a lot of free t-shirts. Oh, my God, from, like, different organizations that I did. Okay. Actually, I had, when I was playing basketball, which was short-lived, but I would wear big t-shirts and basketball shorts.

And, oh, no, wait. So, actually, this was my first year after college. I went home and was wearing, like, basketball shorts and a t-shirt, and I had just viewed my head. And my little brother's friends came over, and they're like, I didn't know Braxton had a brother. And I was like, I'm a woman. I'm a woman.

I'm a grown woman. Yeah. What the hell? That's crazy. You're just dressed like Billy Elish. Yes, exactly. I was setting the trend. And then I immediately changed it.

I started wearing earrings, eyeliner. Changed it all. That's very funny that you're like, no! I was. I've been called Sir a lot on planes. I still get called, sir. Like if I wear a little hat and I have no makeup on and just like a little baggy outfit, like, what would you like to drink, sir?

And I'll be like, a vodka soda. And they're like, I'm like, hey, as long as the booze comes, I don't care. I'm surprised in these times people aren't trained to not say a gender term at all. It's not necessary. Like, what would you like? Or, hey friend, what would you like to eat today? Hey, friend. What are you trying to eat today?

Look, pal, we got a menu here Look, pal, we got a menu here I want that to be the standard at every restaurant Hey pal, we got a menu here And you're like, okay, I'm looking at it, thank you Hey buddy, you look at that menu yet? I'm sorry, we were catching up, but I'll get into it. Yeah, really aggressive.

Yes, yes. That's what I want. Yeah, I don't know. I think it's like older people just naturally. I feel like I've seen younger people do it too. I'm just like, morning, sir. Oh, sorry.

And I'm like, why did you even say, sir? Like, what, why? I think it's just like built into our language. Yeah. Because sometimes I'll do crowd work and I'll gender someone and then be like, actually, I don't know. You want to tell me?

Do you care? What's going on? What's going on? Hey, bud. What's going on? What's going on, buddy? Oh my God. year. So last night, I went to a sewing party. And by sewing party is just a couple people who needed

to rhinestone and sew some stuff together. And my friend Godoy is my sewing Sherpa, my sewing fairy godmother. And I brought three projects. We only got to one. Because I brought a pair of jeans that were too small, but I bought a second pair. And I wanted to combine them. And I thought it was going to be very easy and I walked Godoy how I was going to do it and he was like that's great but then when I started doing it I was like oh this is much harder than I anticipated in order for me to keep the stripes like straight I can't just add a panel on the side I have to add a panel on the inside as well and he was like yes daughter and I was like fuck yeah he like lets me figure out things on my own but then if something is too hard he'll show me how to do it and then I have to do the other

and try, try, try, try, try, try, try. And then if I, like, really can't get it, he'll then do it. And then walk me through how to do it. And I really like this way of learning. Yeah, that's smart. Because you did figure it out. I did. Yeah.

Yes. And he was very proud of me. He was like, I would eyeball it. But, like, and then I was like, I think the way we have to do it is I'll step into it when it's all open and then take some, like, paper to make the pattern for the panels. and he was like, yes. And I was like, is that how you would have done it? He was like, no, I would have eyeballed it. And I was like, yes, because you're a professional.

Well, yeah, you've been doing it longer. And I asked him to show me how to self, or how the machine self-threads the needle. Yeah. Fuck that shit. I'm using a tweezer. It's easier. Oh, it's actually hard. I thought it was hard.

What do you do? How do it? So you have to like loop it in and then a thing comes down and out and then you put it through there and then it flicks it through the hole or whatever. I didn't like it. Oh. I like my old school. Tweezers. Great.

Keep it simple. We have to take a break. Let's take a break. If you hit that mid-afternoon energy crash, you know the routine, another coffee or a bar or chips you probably didn't need. What if there was a better option? Brodo. This podcast is sponsored by Broto. Broto's bone broth is the simplest nutrition upgrade you can make to your daily routine.

Their broths are made from scratch. No concentrates, preservatives, or shortcuts. So you get the best broth money can buy. Broto was launched by James Beard Award-winning chef Marco Canora. 11 years ago, he started serving bone broth out of the window of his NYC apartment. Now, Broto ships nationwide so you don't have to be in New York City to enjoy Chef Marco's masterpiece. My favorite flavor from the sampler pack is the classic chicken broth. It tastes so good.

It's really great for when you're sick or when you're waking up in the morning or when you're going to bed. It's just like nice and warm and fuzzy. Each cup of Broto delivers about 10 grams of whole food protein along with collagen-building amino acid, electrolytes, and nutrients to support gut health, immunity, joint, skin, and general wellness. All under 50 calories with zero sugar or fat. but is broth actually good for you or is it all just hype? Unlike the latest Instagram health fad, bone broth has been around for centuries, so it has proven results.

A 2025 study actually found that the amino acids in broth heals leaky guts and strengthen the immune system. Fun fact, if you were curious, because I was, Broto means broth in Italian. Shop the best broth on the planet with Broto. Head to Broto.com slash best friends for 20% off your first subscription. order and use code best friends for an additional $10 off. Once again, that's brodo.com slash best friends.

For 20% off your first subscription order and an additional $10 off if you use my promo code, best friends. Before Poshmark, I would be like, I don't know where to find a good vintage watch. I would just be in stores going, these are all new. These are not vintage watches. I'd be in department stores going, where is your vintage watch section? And I'd be hunting all over and I would never find it.

After I found Poshmark, I said, wow, this is a marketplace full of vintage watches. And I can order them right to my home and I can look at a vintage watch on the internet. Say I open safari and I put in vintage watches and then I see one I like. I can read the name and I can plug it into Pops. And I could find it because Poshmark is the leading fashion resale marketplace shaped by real people in real style. Millions of new and pre-loved items from daily wardrobe staples to vintage and luxury fashion. Archive worthy pieces you thought you missed out on forever. Current essentials, one-of-a-kind vintage finds.

It's all there. I was looking for a vintage Timex watch because I'm on a budget. And I went on Poshmark and I found it. So when you're ready for a closet refresh, you can earn real money selling those pieces you're ready to part with, reaching more than 80 million users on the platform. You guys, I was looking for a TimeX watch because I'm on a budget. And how did I find it on Poshmark? I said in the search bar, TimeX Watch.

And I found it. I tracked it right on down. And honestly, I was so surprised that the price was so reasonable. Yes, I was looking for a vintage Forever Watch, and I found it on Poshmark in about 10 minutes. And that was so nice. New deals and styles are listed every day, so don't wait. Download the Poshmark app and use code Best Friends when you sign up to get $10 off your first purchase. Or shop now at Poshmark.com slash Best Friends and get $10 off your first purchase.

That's P-O-S-H-M-A-R-K dot com slash best friends. Oh my goodness, hunger strikes. I'm exhausted. I've done 18 podcasts. I don't know what to do. My God, I'm pulling my hair out. I have a hankering for something to slide down my throat that's nourishing to my body. And there's probably something healthy in my fridge or my pantry that I should be making, but ah, I just don't have it in me. For me, eating healthy isn't a willpower thing. It's a setup problem until I found Factor. Factor solves your setup problem with fully prepared meals designed by dietitians and crafted by chefs. And guess what? It is delivered right ding-dong to your door. With Factor, I'm hitting my nutrition goals this season without the planning, the grocery runs, or the cooking. My current favorite Factor meal is the Buffalo Ranch grilled chicken. Mm-mm, cluck-cluck. I love the flavors, and it makes me feel like I ate something not only good, but also good for me too.

Factor is meals built around your goals, whether that's weight loss, if that's something you're into, overall nutrition, more protein or GLP1 support for strength and workout recovery. Check out Factor's muscle pro collection. Fresh, never frozen, over 100 rotating weekly meals, including globally. inspired flavors like Mediterranean and Asian. There's always something new to look forward to. Ready in two minutes. Factor shops, preps, cooks, and delivers straight to your door so you have more time for everything you love this spring. Oh boy, I love Factor. Because when I hear ding-dong, I say, I hope it's not a person. I hope it's food. Head to Factor Meals.com. com slash best friends 50 off and use code best friends 50 off to get 50% off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27th, 2026.

See website for more details. Hello, Sashir. Hi, Nicole. It's May. It's May. It's mental health awareness month. Yes. And I think we should do.

a fun thing with Alma. Yes. Yes, a little segment where we check in with one another and see how we're doing for real. For real. Since Alma is so good about connecting people with therapists and clinicians, I think it's appropriate that we talk about mental health. Yes, and we talk a lot about mental health on the podcast anyway. You're in therapy.

I'm in therapy. We love therapy. Yes. And if you do want to get into therapy with Alma, you can switch. therapists, which I think is good because you need to find a good fit for yourself. Yeah, it's like dating. You're trying to find people who click with you and people you feel safe with. Yeah, let's check in. How are you actually doing this week? I, sometimes I wake up and I feel like a little overwhelmed because just like there's so many

options of what I could do in a day as far as like my schedule and doing things I think I should be doing or feeling like I have to do tasks for other people and then I didn't even get out of bed yet and I'm already feeling like anxious and I don't love that. Yeah I get that I sometimes

lay in bed and I'm like well if I get up then I have to start doing and then if I start doing I have to complete and then I have to finish and a nice thing I started doing was being a little nicer to myself and just

slowly getting up and slowly trying to figure out what the day will hold. Yeah. And then I hadn't been doing my little exercise videos. Yeah. Those help. Yeah. Moving my body does help. And I find that annoying.

I try to go outside pretty quickly after I wake up. That helps me a lot. Like putting my foot, my feet on the ground and like getting sunlight on my face. And then it's like, okay, day starting. Mm-hmm. I like that. Feet to the earth. Feet to the earth.

And also, I do therapy every week. Mm-hmm. Even if I don't want to. Yeah. That's good. I think so. Yeah. Yeah.

And a therapist did help me create something that we called later lists, where if I start thinking of a thing or a task I need to do, and so just like doing it at that moment, I can write it on the list. And then if I'm in a moment where I'm like, I know I should be doing something, but I don't know what. I can look at the list and be like, oh, yeah, I had this task that I need to do. Yeah. I do therapy even though I don't want to because it is nice to just check in with this person who cares about me, but like doesn't have any stakes in my life.

Yeah. And I just, I really like my therapist. We've been together for, we've been together. Our relationships going on, I think two years. I don't know. That's great. So she, like, knows me well. and also will challenge me in a way

where I'm like, sometimes she goes, what is easy? And then I have to go, oh, there's so many things in my life that are easy. I don't have to focus on the bad things. I like that. Yeah. I like that.

Look at us. Look at us. Taking care of ourselves and our brains. Taking care of ourselves and our brains. And you can get started now at hello-alma.com slash best friends. That's helloalma.com slash B-E-S-T-F-F-E-S-T-F. F-R-I-N-D-S.

And we're back. And then, okay, here's another thing I learned. Yes. Meatball was also there. So God-Joy Meatball were like, hey, where's that stick that you put at the top of the machine for the thread? And I was like, I don't know what you're talking about. And they're like, all these things that came with your machine, where are they? And I was like, I don't think I have them.

I think I opened the box and I was like, machine. And then I was like, I don't know what any of that is. And threw it away. No, I hope not. I think that's what I did. Did you check the compartment on the bottom? I did. There's nothing in there.

I did bad. So maybe. Mm-hmm. And both of them were like, well, how are you sewing if you don't have the thing that the spool sits in? And I was like, oh, I use the small thing. And they were like, the bobbin? And I was like, yes. And they're like, do you run out of, like, thread all the time?

I was like, yes. It's really upsetting. And I go through them so quickly. And they were like, so you're just buying bobbins? And I said, yes. So I guess I'm making it much harder for myself because you could buy a big spool of thread and make your own bobbins. Oh, yeah. That's really funny.

Are you going to, is the stick that you can put a thread on, are you able to buy just a stick? Yes. I ordered all the stuff that comes in the little bag. I ordered all that. So then I'll have it. And I didn't know you could change the foot. So there's the needle. And then under the needles, the foot that clamps onto the fabric to kind of hold it so you know your seam allowances and whatnot.

I didn't know you could change it. To what? Different feet. Bigger feet? Bigger feet? Smaller feet? Sharper feet? I don't know.

I don't know. Stinky feet. Ooh, pretty feet. Ooh, feet that go on. Policed feet. It's wild how I just jumped into this and didn't read a book. The only video I've ever watched is how to thread my bobbin, and I learned I was doing that wrong. They were like, it's getting there, but you did do it wrong, and I was like, got it.

That's the matter of you're doing it. Like, you are sewing. I am. Despite maybe missing a lot of pieces. Yeah, I'm sewing in spite of not because I've made it easy for myself. I can't wait for you to have all the tools. You need... Here we fly in.

I know. And Godoy was like, you actually, like, you learn fast and then you do it well. Yeah. And I was really proud about that. Yeah. Oh, and we also made a pattern for a jumpsuit. Oh, great.

And I just... I'm excited. Yeah. I'm going to make things. Just going to make things. Missing the threadholder reminded me of my hair clippers. Because I had this...

guard that was like, I think it's a fade guard. I don't, you know, I've watched, and I've actually watched a bunch of YouTube videos on cutting hair. Uh-huh. Because I cut my own hair. And there's like so much. There's so many different types of guard, so many levels. And I was like, I just want one level. I don't want to do much.

So it's a fade guard, but that's the length I like my hair to go all over. And some of the little, like, teeth on the comb fully broke off. So it was like a gap tooth thing. And that wasn't working. I was like maybe I'll just shave around it. It wasn't working. That's really funny. And so, but I couldn't find, I couldn't buy just that.

Oh. Like just one fade guard. And then I was looking for, it was a mess. And then also now my clippers just broke. So I was like, all right, I need to find new clippers. And I don't want to buy, like, just buy things from Amazon anymore. And I was like, where do I go to get clippers? That's what Amazon.

wants. That's what they want. They want us to go, where do we ever get a thing from? I know. But I went to Sally's Beauty Supply. Yes. And they had so many clippers.

They didn't have any that were the ones I had before. But then they had these other ones. And they had a bunch of other, like, features to it. Like, one was like turbo. And I was like, what does that mean? Is that faster? I guess. It just makes that noise.

It goes the same. Yeah. Like those E... motorcycles, those electric motorcycles that like don't have to make a sound, but they do. That's very funny. So I did find some clippers, but they have, they have a, like, a hat. They have, like, the guard has like a little hood. And it kind of catches the hair, but I don't want to catch the hair.

I want to be free. Oh. I don't know how to fix that. So your clippers are uncircumcised. That is what it seems like. Things are getting caught in there. I have to open it up and clean it out. And that's why men get circumcised.

It takes too much for them to open it up and clean it out. That's so funny. I wonder if you would have had to buy new clippers if you had like an old school pair of clippers. Because I think you were with me in Palm Springs or maybe it was Joshua Tree. I found a pink sewing machine. And I took a picture and I sent it to all my sewing friends. I was like, does anybody want this? I don't think I'd be able to like work this.

and it should go to a home where it'll be used. And then Meatball was like, I want it. And he took it to get service. And he was like, yeah, this will never break. All the parts inside are, like, nothing's been replaced and it's all metal. Everything now is made with, like, plastic parts. So things just fucking break. Oh, yeah.

My old clippers were full of plastic. And I was like, I don't know where anything goes. I took it apart. I was like really trying to figure this out. I was like, I'm going to put this here. And I was like, I have no idea how this is going to work. I love that you took it apart. Because I thought, I was like,

It might be like an adjustment thing, like something maybe went loose. And I think that is true, but I really could figure it out. And yeah, full of plastic parts. It's wild, but things are made literally to break now. Yeah. There's this lady. I saw her on the internet. Ever heard of it?

I've heard of it. Mm-hmm. She services ovens. Okay. And resells, like, old-timey ovens. And she's like, all these ovens need is to be serviced because they're all made with, like, good quality parts. Same with like old refrigerators They'll last for like fucking forever

Yeah Ugh everything now Plastic Pooh poo puh yuck Boo We need a company that's like Hey you want You want old shit

The way it used to be made We'll sell it too for a lot of money But you'll never buy another one Yeah I would pay a lot of money for something that's going to last Right? Yeah I wish You know what I also want

Incandescent light bulbs Everything's LED We need those old light bulbs because that is actually probably it's like good for our eyes and our hormones and the LED actually like messes up our brain. Oh, is this like a it's like a soft yellowy?

Yeah. And not white. Mm-hmm. You're right. Yeah. They only sell LEDs? Yes. It's like you cannot actually find incandescent light bulbs like new ones.

How you just discontinue a light bulb? I don't know. I don't know. Thomas wouldn't like that. Thomas wouldn't like that. He's like, let them all have light. People want us to all have a choice. Yes.

A choice in our light. I want to say it's like illegal to like sell incandescent light bulbs. Maybe that's crazy. Whoa. Should we start a light bulb prohibition? Give us back the light. Take back the light. Ali, can you look it up?

Yeah. So incandescent light bulbs were banned primarily due to their extreme energy and efficiency. They convert only about 5% of energy into light and the rest is heat. And then there was a 2023

regulation that mandated a minimum of 45 lumens per watt, which is like favoring long lasting cost effective LED alternatives to reduce carbon emissions and utility bills. Ah. I mean, that's true.

They definitely don't last as long. They heat you up. And they don't last. And you're like, bring them back. That's what I want. I want to be hot and replacing light bulbs all day. That's so funny since here. Bring them back.

I really want them. And Ali's like, actually, they kill. Yeah. All right. I wonder if there is, I think you could get like a different glow of an LED. I think so. But I think the issue is like, because I saw a. video where they, like, recorded a light that looked like just a stationary light.

Mm-hmm. That was LED. And they slowed it down. And it was, like, flickering like this. So it's like, we're actually looking at that all the time. Because that's just what they do. Oh. And we shouldn't be.

I don't like that. Mm-mm. I once was shooting this thing and where they had the actors holding. My light was just doing that all day long. Yeah. And by the time I left. I was like, hmm, I'm nauseous. I like don't feel good.

Oh, no. It was not good. And then at one point I did turn the lights off, but then I was like, well, now I'm just, I'm in the dark. And if someone comes to get me, they're going to be like, are you okay? Are you feeling good? Like, hello? Do you need something? What's happening in here?

Yeah. I mean, sometimes it's nice as in the dark. Get a little recharge. Sometimes it is nice to sit in the dark. Sometimes I'll be in a room. just at home, doing things, working on maybe the computer or something, and then the sun will set. And then I look around, I'm like, it's actually pitch black in here. Yeah. And then I'm like, do I get up?

Sit in the dark. There's times I've opted to just sit in the dark. Also, I'm like gripping on this chair and I don't know why. It's not dark now. It's okay. It's okay. Darkness is coming. Darkness is a promise. It's actually really good for your sleep and your eyes, because I'm constantly looking for things that are good for my eyes, to watch the sunrise and watch the sunset. I could do one. You can definitely do the sunset.

Uh-huh. Watching the sunrise? I'm never awake for that. I actually was awake the other day for it. Like I, my body just woke up like seven something. And it was like a little bit of light and I was like, let me go check out the sun. Uh-huh.

And so I went outside And it took forever I was like I don't have time to say here Wait for this I'm dying I was like Okay That's so funny

All right On with it Come on! Get into the fucking sky! I feel like sunset They have been pretty fast Yeah Sunrise took forever

I feel like I've been on Like a sunset cruise around Like a lake or whatever And you're like Oh this sun's Oh, it's gone. Yeah. You're like, all right.

Well, I guess I'll have some champagne. I don't know. It's dark. That's really funny that it takes a really long time for the sun to rise. Hello. I'm trying to see you. Did you wait for the sun to rise? I did it.

I went back inside. I was like, I can't wait forever. Yeah, I'm not. I can't be awake for that. Anytime I'm at a hotel. Oh, like the Langham Hotel. And they tell me what time breakfast is. I always say, oh, I won't be awake for that.

And they always just go, oh. Okay. It feels like they don't want you to have breakfast. No. They make it out of crate. There's like 6 a.m. to 8.30 a.m. That's when you can have breakfast. Yes.

What? Yes, it's wild. Same with McDonald's. I think they stop serving breakfast at 10 a.m. Rude. So rude. I should be able to get eggs until noon. Yes.

I agree. It's still morning. Until the a.m. stops? Yes. Keeps serving breakfast. I agree. And I don't get it. Mm-mm.

That's like if you're in the Delta Lounge, they flip it before noon. And I'm like, I want a fucking bagel. It's 11.30. Give me a bagel. Don't give me fajitas. It's 10 a.m. I don't want a fajita in the morning. No.

I wonder who did that. Who did that? How do we stop it? How do we stop it? Yeah. Who decided that like breakfasts? Breakfast doesn't go until at least noon. Also, like, in my mind, it's easier to make breakfast.

So why would you want to, like, make easy dishes as long as you can before you so have to start making, like, lunchtime meals? Maybe it's, like, conserving eggs? I feel like there's so many eggs. I feel like we're overwhelmed with eggs. America is egg wealthy. There's so many. There's so many fucking eggs. There's so many fucking eggs here.

Everywhere. I mean, I guess you're right. I don't know. Actually, no. There was an egg shortage. There was an egg shortage. Yes, and eggs were really expensive. Yeah.

So maybe. Never mind. I take it back. We can serve these eggs. I've been buying blue eggs. Ooh. From the farmer's bucket? No.

Okay. Gellisons. Great. They're blue in shell. And then in the middle, golden. Ooh. It's lovely. That is lovely.

I'm never up early enough to go to a farmer's market And then when they like go a little later I'm like, huh, now it's too hot That's true I can't be outside of this heat That's true It's not as fun when you're like sweating No

But I wish I wish one day to wake up to go to a farmer's market I believe me I wonder if I could get un-pasteurized eggs At a farmer's market Probably I'm sure I think unpasterized eggs taste better

You know I actually don't know If I know the difference Oh Yeah. I don't know if I've clocked it. Next time you're in Mexico, eat an egg. Yeah, okay. And then take that memory with you. So eat an, okay.

When you're in Mexico, eat an egg right before you get on a plane back here. And as soon as you land, eat an egg. That's an experiment. Okay. That is an experiment. All right. I'll try that. An egg experiment?

I guess what I have for you is unconditional love. No conditions. I am not a pun girl But you're surrounded by pun people I know I know Everyone in my life loves a fucking pun They're fun

I think it's because I'm not quick in that But sometimes you are Arena Sometimes you pull out a pun Every now and again I will pull out a pun And I'll be like stop the presses Stop the conversation Do we hear what I said?

Listen to this guys Get a load of this! Sometimes I am so proud of what I've said in a conversation And it will like No one will clock it or acknowledge it And I'll be like, excuse me, I said something really funny a minute ago And I don't know if you heard it, would you like me to repeat it? I've definitely done that.

Like did you guys catch that? What I said, it was really funny. It was really witty. Yeah, because we should all be going, That was so funny. When somebody says something funny. Don't know a waste of funny line. Yes. People got to hear this.

Yes. You don't want it to float away like a fart in the wind. That's a quote from something. Or maybe that's a co-wocelism. That's not how you say that word. Close. Colloquialism. Colloquialism. Lord.

Is it? It's from Shawshake. I knew it. I knew it was from Shawshake Redemption, but I didn't want to just say it. You should have just said it. Follow your heart. Listen to your instincts. I think Red says it. I think he does too. Wow.

I love Shawshank Redemption. Flit away like a fart in the wind. So poetic. Have you watched Shawshank Redemption? I have. It is a bummer. But isn't it nice at the end? Yes.

But the whole movie is about it. Yeah. The journey to the, because I feel like I've watched it so many times and then I recently rewatch it and I was like, whoa. This movie I love is really sad for one character. Well, two characters. Red keeps getting denied parole. Yeah.

And then Andy Dufrein has a rough time in prison. But they do both get to go to Zwatinejo. Mm-hmm. Zewatinejo. Yeah. I want to go to Zawattanejo. Where is that again? It's in Mexico.

Oh, okay. I wanted to say close to the border of Texas in Mexico, but I don't, I think that's just where Andy crossed, and I don't know where Zeyo actually is. Yeah. That's fine. It's in the state of... I'm bad at this. Guerrero on the Pacific coast of Mexico.

Oh, okay. Pacific Coast. Where on the Pacific Coast? Straight shot. We just got to go down. We just got to go down. Nice. I'm going down.

I'm going down. Dant-d-d-d-d-d-d- because you went around. Baby. To Zwa Zwa-Teneha. Perfect. You see our on the marquee. It says my best friends. No.

It was like, Nicole and Sashir forever, forever. Oh, that's cute. Listen to best friends. I like that. Yeah, that's cute. I don't know how I don't, I guess I don't clock it because I'm, I hardly ever drive past the studio. I never, oh, Lolaola clocked it because she was in the passenger seat and she was like, oh, that's cute.

I was like, oh, that is cute. Ooh, let's take a break. As best friends, we've taken a lot of really fun trips together over the years. A few years ago, we went on a trip to live. Lake Arrowhead where we booked a stay on Airbnb with a group of friends to celebrate one of their birthdays. It was important to us that we had a private space that felt like our own while also feeling like we were on vacation. We ended up staying in this really, really cute A-frame house with amenities like a hot tub in the backyard, a pool table for game nights, and even a grill for

barbecuing. I still think about that trip all the time and how hard we laughed. And part of what it made it so special was Airbnb. Airbnb gives you more space, more privacy, better locations and beautiful homes to make vacation memories in. We'd rather meet up in a living room than a hotel lobby. And booking stays through Airbnb makes that possible. Support for this podcast is brought to you by Chamberlain University. I have to tell you, anytime I go to the hospital or a clinic, my anxiety is absolutely through the roof.

It's just an overwhelming, scary place to be. But I feel like we've all experienced meeting an exceptional nurse who walks into the room and changes your day completely. They are so experienced and they know exactly what to say to take the panic out of the room and make a terrifying day feel completely manageable.

And if you're looking for a new career path or you just want to do a job that truly matters, you cannot help but think, wow, that is exactly the kind of nurse I want to be. Chamberlain University is where you start. Discover your calling at chamberlain.edu. Chamberlain University belong to something greater, certified to operate by Shev. Starting something new isn't just hard. It's terrifying. So much work goes into this thing that you're not entirely sure will work out.

and it can be hard to make that leap of faith. Trust me, I know. When I started doing this podcast, I wasn't even sure what I was doing. Like, isn't anyone going to listen? Are we going to make fools of ourselves? And now I know I was right in believing in myself and launching a podcast, despite all the fears and hesitations. It also helps when you have a partner like Shopify on your side to help. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S.,

from household names like Magic Spoon. Mattel to brands just getting started. Get started with your own design studio. With hundreds of ready-to-use templates, Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand style. Accelerate your efficiency, whether you're uploading new products or trying to improve existing ones. Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines,

and even enhance your product photography. Get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you. Easily create email and social media campaigns. wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. Best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert with world-class expertise in everything from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and beyond.

If people haven't heard about my brand, Shopify helps you find your customers with easy-to-run email and social media campaigns. And what if I get stuck? Shopify is always around to share advice with their award-winning 24-7 customer support. Tackle all those important tasks. in one place from inventory to payments to analytics and more. No need to save multiple websites

or try to figure out what platform is hosting the tool that you need. Everything is all in one place, making your life easier and your business operations smoother. And did I mention that iconic purple shop pay button that's used by millions of businesses around the world? It's why Shopify has the best converting checkout on the planet. It also helps boost conversions, meaning less carts going, abandoned, and more sales for you. It's time to turn those what-ifs into... With Shopify today, sign up for your $1 per month trial today. Shopify.com slash best friends.

Go to shopify.com slash best friends. That's Shopify.com slash best friends. And we're back. Should we do a quiz or something? Let's do a quiz. I bit my lip last night and it's like kind of hurting. Does it feel like sore, like open? I don't think it's open.

It's a little sore. I hate when you bite your lip and then you keep biting that same spot because it's larger than usual. So your teeth keep running into it. Ugh. It's annoying. Terrible.

Terrible. Also biting your lip is like kind of humiliating. It's like these are my own teeth. Yeah. My own mouth, my own lips. And I just got, like, too excited to eat pizza. That's what happened last night. I was like, oh, my God.

And I was like, I got to finish the pizza. Or I've also, like, scratched the roof of my mouth a bunch with, like, chips. And it's like, sometimes it's just shoving them into my mouth so hard. It's like, girl, just chew your food. Just chew. Sometimes it, ooh, what percent unicorn are you? Ooh. Okay.

What is your favorite color? Pink. Purple. Blue. Red. Orange. Green. Black.

Brown. Yellow. Wow. That got hard. That got so hard. What is my favorite color? Out of these? I think I would say orange.

Oh. Yeah. Wait, what's your favorite color in general? Maybe gold. Gold, okay. Yeah. Mine's purple. Surprise.

Surprise. I'm wearing it now. The nails are purple. Some of the rings are purple. This ring is purple I guess that's a shade of purple too Mm-hmm What do you think of glitter?

I think it's great It's okay Not my strong suit Murderous Sure It was It has pros and cons It has its pros and cons

I think it's great When it comes to glitter I want to say It has its pros and cons because I can think of a really strong con, which is that it gets everywhere. It really does. It takes so long to get it out of everything.

I once put a ton of glitter in a Father's Day card for my dad. No. And he opened it in his office. And the noise he made was not the noise I thought he was going to make. And boy, oh boy, was he angry. Oh, no. And years later, we were still vacuuming purple glitter out of the carpet. Yeah, it takes forever.

whoopsies. There was a trend for a while where people were glitter bombing people like their ex or like someone who cheated on them or someone who deserved something they would glitter bomb their room and it's like good luck cleaning that up.

Oof, that's wild. I read somewhere that like ladies would put glittered lotion on themselves if they went on a date in case something not nice happened. They'd leave glitter around sucks that we have to booby trap ourselves. Yeah.

But smart. Smart. Yeah. But also. Devastating. Pick an animal. Dog. Cat.

Bunny. Sloth. Tiger. Owl. Lion. Swan. Horse. Ha.

Ooh. I'm going to say tiger. Mm-hmm. I have a tiger. Okay. You're both going tiger? No. No.

Okay. I'm going to say horse. I want to be a horse girl and I'm not. I keep buying stuff with horses on it and going, I don't need this. I got to give this away. We should go to a horse race. I would love to go to a horse race. We can.

There's like equestrian centers. Oh. Yeah. I want to go to the Kentucky Derby and wear a big, nasty hat. That's fun. What a dang treat that would be? That would be a big nasty hat. A big nasty hat.

I can wear that purple hat that I got from the, that it stays sale. That's true. That's a perfect derby hat. I love that hat, but I really have nowhere to. wear it. Yeah. And I could just wear it, but sometimes I really just don't want, I'm not in the mood for someone to look at me. Yeah. And when I'm in the mood for someone to look at me, I don't want to wear the hat. Yeah. It's a specific, like, there has to be something going on for the hat to come out. Yes. Like a masquerade ball. Oh, my goodness. I got to look at my calendar and see

if I've got one coming up. Me and the Phantom of the Opera have a date. Go to the masquerade ball. I love that he said It's for something specific Like a masquerade ball You know That yearly thing that happens When a masquerade ball comes up Yes I gotta see if it's coming

What season do you like the most Spring summer? Winter Fall Between spring and summer Between fall and winter It's pretty funny Because I'm like

Are those really seasons? I don't think so It's like two weeks. I like the two days between spring and summer. Yeah. You know what's interesting. Theoretically, I love summer. Yeah.

But then I get so sick of summer because it's so fucking hot. It's so hot. And then theoretically, love winter because I love a sweater. But then it gets so cold. Yeah. Hmm. I'm going to say, I'm going to do it. I'm going to pull the trigger and say an insane one.

I'm going to say between spring and summer. That is insane. Nicole. Oh. You can't. I'm wild. I'm going to say spring. Official.

Okay. Pick a movie genre. Comedy. Action. Sci-fi. Fantasy. Romance. Mystery.

I don't watch enough mystery movies. I guess I don't either. I think I'd like to get into that. Okay. Is like knives out a mystery? Yes. And that's what I was thinking. I was like, I think I would love to watch more movies like Knives Out. Sometimes I get frustrated with mystery movies because I'm like, what is it? Tell me, what's happening? Who did it?

Sometimes watching a normal movie's a mystery to me. I will have eyes on it watching the whole time and be like, hey, who is that? And then sometimes I'll be like, don't ask who is it because both of us are watching it. And, like, I'll figure it out later. Someone will tell me who this person is later. My girlfriend and I were watching James Bond, one of the James Bond movies. And someone had just described exactly what was going to happen in the mission. And then the scene changed. And I was like, so what are they supposed to do?

And she was like, they just said it. Literally just laid it out. And I was like, oh, it's really hard to follow. Sometimes it is hard to follow. And you're like, wait, how did they end up here? Yeah. I watched one movie that took place on a train. It was a Denzel Washington and I think Chris Pine two-hander.

One location, this train. And you wouldn't believe the amount of questions I had. The whole thing was like, this train's going too fast. Stop it. And I was like, wait, how did it get fast again? And why are they on a train? And I was like, and why is Chris Pine his friend? It's really funny.

So many questions. Like to the point where I was like, I gotta stop asking them. I just, it's a train. They got to stop it. Like, I think that's all I need to know. A movie genre. I'm gonna, ooh, what's you gonna say? I'm gonna say action.

That's exactly what I'm gonna say. I love an action movie. Same. Mm-hmm. What do you think others like about you? Smart. Fun. Friendly.

Reliable. Funny. Funny. Comforting. Hmm. Hmm. I think I'm fun. Definitely.

I'm, like, pretty down to clown. Yeah. Yeah. You a fun girl. Mm-hmm. I would say comforting. Yeah. Yeah.

I think I've gotten lately. Oh. I've gotten some comments about my calm demeanor. Wow. She's in her comfy era. My comfy era, yes. Okay. What is your favorite ice cream flover?

Vanilla. Strawberry. Chocolate. Cookie dough. Butter pecan. Neapolitan You have some opinions about that I do not like Neapolitan

Who's ordering Neapolitan? That's not the one that's like different Like chocolate strawberry Yes and vanilla It's the three hits in one Together Yeah that's strange But you're never gonna get like a scoop of all three

They're so far apart That is also true Mush is up So it's chocolate and vanilla And like what? It's mud by the end What is that? Okay, listen, do I ignore it?

I need to know who created Neapolitan and why. Oh. Is it someone named Neopolitan? Maybe it was Napoleon? Nope, that's what I was going to say, and I was like, that's not. Those are not the same words, Neapolitan and Napoleon. No, it's not. But I really do need to know why it was created.

Yeah. I'm so sorry, I got so upset. Hmm. And, like, why? where they like, because it's like, just get three scoops of the ice cream. Okay, it's from a, it's from 19th century Naples. Oh. And it was brought to the U.S. by immigrants.

And it was created to showcase multi-flavored ice cream. And the early versions mimicked the Italian flag with green pistachio, white vanilla, and red cherry. Oh. Okay. That makes more fucking sense. So much sense. And chocolate, vanilla, strawberry. Also, like, yeah.

Who took over that? I don't know. So those, the flavors changed in the late 19th, early 20th century because those are American favorite flavors. Oh. They said, fuck Italians. We ruin everything. I thought it was going to be like a World War II thing where it was like, we have to ration the ice cream, but the kids deserve a treat. Combine them all.

Get the scraps. Give the children scraps. But my favorite flabber of ice cream is vanilla. And I don't care what anybody says. People are like vanilla, people are boring. No or not. Vanilla's a flavor and it's good. It is a flavor.

Yes. I'm 100% unicorn. You are definitely a unicorn in disguise. You see the entire world is a place filled with hope and positivity. You have a fierce imagination and you are very, imaginative and creative person. Good luck unicorn! Good luck unicorn! I like the picture they picked of that unicorn. It's like kind of smiling. He looks kind of tired too. Well, he's doing too much magic with that horn. The whole rainbow came

out of his horn. Okay. And mine, my favorite flavor, I'm going to say cookie dough because I mostly like the cookie part. That's fine. I'm only 10% unicorn. Only 10%. That's wild. That's such a small I can't believe you're only 10% unicorn. What answer? Some of our answers are the same. Wow. You are more of a realist and you prefer the more logical side of things. That is true.

Yeah? That actually is really true. Wow. Okay. But just 10%? Not even like 20. That is wild. 10?

10% unicorn. But the description is apt. It is. It's very accurate. Yeah. Wow. That was a treat. I'm a hundred.

I'm a unicorn. You're 100%. Oh, my God. Wow. Now, what do I do with that information? You go be magical somewhere. Imagine I just start floating. I would love to levitate.

Very cool. Just hover. Mm-hmm. Should we answer some questions? Yes. Let's get into it. Remember when David Blaine would hover all over the place? I had a friend.

Yes, I do remember. I had a friend who said they saw David Blaine, and his first trick was just throwing himself into empty boxes. broke his arm. And I was like, yeah, he really wasn't doing like magic. He was like, what if I die in front of an audience? He's like the jackass of magic. Yeah.

Let me fit in the tiny box and put me in water. Yeah, like some of his tricks were like, watch me sleep up high. It's really funny. It's funny. I haven't thought about him in so long. I think he's still doing stuff. I don't know what he's doing that. Yeah, I wonder how he is.

I hope well. I hope well, too. David Blaine, if you're listening, reach out to us. Let's know how you're doing. We're thinking about you. We're thinking about you. Imagine someone showed that to him and he was like,

why are these women concerned about me? He's like, I'm totally fine. I'm absolutely fine. I have a show where I'm going to hurl myself off the Empire State Building tomorrow. I'm going to break every bone in my body. And do it again next night. Yeah, they're going to have dragged my bones up there. Hirl me off again.

All right. Let's answer a question. Okay. Hi, Nicole and Sashir. I am currently in a situation ship. I'll call her Brenda, and we have a friend group of three other girls we hang with. Brenda and I have a good time together, but she has some problematic behaviors that affect our relationship and have affected the entire friend group. She's overly emotional, highly sensitive, and highly defensive. I'm working through some of these issues with her in our personal relationship, but the friend group has gotten fed up. Because of Brenda, our group hangouts were becoming so stressful that they weren't enjoyable anymore.

She tried to organize an out-of-state trip for all of us, and her behaviors ended up being so off-putting that the others in the group decided to cancel the trip completely. None of the other girls felt like they could talk to Brenda and tell her how they felt because she's so emotional and erratic. So about a month ago, when things came to a head, I decided it was time to say something. I got permission from the group, then had a conversation with Brenda. to tell her the concerns the group had as a whole. Needless to say, this did not go well.

She refuted all of my claims, denied any responsibility, and turned the blame back on me slash us. On top of that, she's now outstead herself from the group completely and is very clearly stated she will no longer be a part of it. She and I still see each other, even though it's sometimes strained. I'm still hanging out with the group. Brenda is not. My question is, should I feel guilty about blowing this whole thing up?

The group was talking about these behaviors consistently behind her back, and I'm just the one who decided to be up front with her about it. Should any part of me feel guilty about her not being a part of the group anymore, even though it's fully her choice? I can't explain how much I love you guys. You were literally the sunshine that lights up my whole day. Thank you for reading Tiffany in Texas. Oh. Did I miss the part? Did they specify what the behavior was?

No, unfortunately. Okay. Just behaviors that the group didn't like. And I guess Brenda's very emotional. So it's hard to talk to Brenda about things. I don't think they should feel guilty at all. You said, what's up? Brenda said,

Ah! Brenda stopped hanging? That's Brenda. That's Brenda for you That's Brenda Yeah Like you were honest And that's a good thing

And if Brenda Didn't like what she heard That's for Brenda to figure out And Yeah And Brenda chose to leave the group And that's kind of all you can do Yeah I don't know

Because what The other other option was to not say anything at all And like let her Recave Fester, yeah. That is wild that Brenda. It was Brenda who planned a trip out of state and then was acting up and everyone was like,

oh, we can't go anywhere with you. Yeah. Oh. Mm. I wonder. Okay. Mm. Maybe I'm, like, reading into this too much.

Mm-hmm. But maybe the person who talked to Brenda about their behavior through the friend group under the bus, because if the person who wrote in, is confronting Brenda but Brenda's still chilling with her. Why? Is that why there's guilt?

Ooh. Oh, a sleuth. Come on, Tyler Perry. She created drama. Yeah, I wonder if it was a thing where it's like, you didn't hear it for me. Or like... Yes.

I don't think this, but the other girls think maybe you are crazy. Yeah, I wonder. I need to know how it was presented to Brenda. And what Brenda was doing. Yeah, I know. I want to know what Brenda was doing. But yeah, like that I maybe would feel guilty about if it was like you maybe didn't say that you alive with these views.

Uh-huh. Because that is easier to be like, I think you're good. Good. But everyone else is. Yeah. But we don't know. We don't know. And that was just a hypothetical.

I'm not blaming our listener. because I love that you listen. Don't think I'm, you know, I'm not being rude to you. I'm just saying, what if? What if? What if that didn't happen? And the listener just, like, was straight up, like, here's the information, here's the lowdown, here's what we think.

Which also maybe Brenda still hangs with this listener because they're like, well, you're the only one who's honest to me. Mm-hmm. Which is valid. Yeah. Yeah, I don't think you should feel guilty. Sometimes it happens. And also maybe Brenda might come back to the group.

But also it sounds like it wasn't working well anyway. So it's probably for the best that maybe Brenda doesn't have that energy in this circle. And then Brenda could go out and find other people to terrorize. Or maybe she won't be a terrorist with a new friend group. Truly. Sometimes people like have a different energy with different people. Maybe Brenda was like feeling erratic for other reasons. Like maybe she was feeling the reaction of other people to her personality.

Oh yeah. And it was like heightening something. So maybe with other people she can be calm. Who knows? What's going on with Brenda? What's going on with Brenda? There's something about Brenda. Like that movie, there's something about Kevin.

Never seen it. I thought you were talking about, there's something about Mary. We need to talk about Kevin. Something about Kevin. We need to talk about Mary. Those are the ones I've seen. It's really funny. I really fucked that up.

Something about Kevin. That's really funny. Solved. Stopped. Okay. Hi, Nicole. Hi, hi, Sashir. Me and my best friend have known each other since freshman year high school, and we're now in our early 30s.

I love this woman to the ends of the earth, and we often tell each other we are basically soulmates in the form of friends. But there's something that she does that has really been bothering me lately. She's a chronic plan counselor. It doesn't happen every time, but it does happen often. Usually we make plans at least a week ahead of time, but when it comes to the actual day, she would cancel. Sometimes it's for valid reasons, like money problems. other times I feel like it's something she can work through, like she started her period. But she will also cancel simply because she doesn't feel like it anymore.

It seems like at almost any inconvenience, whether big or small, she would cancel. Just in the last week, she has canceled and rescheduled three times. And don't get me wrong, I'm very understanding and won't ever hold it against her. I get that shit happens, but lately when she has been canceling on me, I've been feeling sad and frustrated. mind you, I've never canceled on her. But I can't help but feel some type of way because I wouldn't cancel on plans I've made with someone. Even if I didn't want to go anymore, but I already made the plan, I would still show up. And more often than not, I will say I'm glad I went. I haven't brought it up because I don't want to come off as insensitive or not understanding of whatever her

situation is, so I've been keeping it to myself. But being canceled on so often doesn't feel good, especially the day of. Why do you think, or what do you think I should do or how can I deal with this? Am I wrong for feeling like this? Should I just let it go? I also will say, although she cancels often, often when we do get to hang, everything is all good and the negative thoughts and feelings go away as if none of that ever happened. So our friendship hasn't been affected. Anyway, I love listening to the podcast every week and it's one of my comfort podcasts. You two ladies are such a light in this world. Love you both. On one hand, I'm like, yes, diva, cancel. Yes, you have your period? Stay home.

But on the flip side, I'm like, you can't do that. You have to show it for your community in order to have a community. Yeah, it's not like never cancel. Like, pick the stuff. Because also, like, one of the excuses was money. You know, you knew last week you didn't have enough money. Girl? You called her poor.

You said you knew you were poor last week. You're poor today. Nothing's happened. You didn't scratch hard enough. You didn't win the lottery. I can't believe you called her friend poor like that. I was a trying to go to my poor. But like, you know, you're absolutely right.

Is that like day of being like, uh-oh, I don't know, I'm not enough money for tonight. Like you knew you had to have known you were in a place to do that. The day of their hang, she's like, well, Spargo, am I poor? They're like, yeah, bitch. Is there any money? I don't know. Can't go. I got to cancel.

Yeah. No, I know exactly what you mean. Yeah. Yeah. If you're making a plan for next Thursday to do something that you have money and you know you don't have money, don't make a plan that you got to spend money on. Yeah. And there's plenty of plans that don't require money. You can go to the park for free.

Yes. You can. Maybe a beach. Yeah. Beaches are free. Beaches are free. Come over to your house and watch a movie. That's free.

That's free. Unless you got to stream it somewhere. Oh, Lord. Rent it. Oh, Lord. Oh, Lord. But I do think that our listener who wrote in needs to talk to their friends and say, hey, I love hanging with you. Hanging with you is really, really fun.

But like, it is really tough to make plans and then you cancel. It doesn't make me feel good. Yeah. It makes me feel like I'm low on the priority list. And I don't want to feel low on the priority list. And hanging out is really important. Yeah. I agree with everything you just said.

Yes. And then call her a broke-ass bitch Say I don't want no scrub The scrubs is your friend who makes a plan And can't afford it she's a buster Call her poor Right at the end

Call her poor And I'm gonna find some rich friends Yeah No definitely you need to have a conversation And it doesn't have to be like a confrontation Like you said the hangs are good But maybe you can highlight that Be like when we do hang it is so nice

And so when we don't It is a bummer to me And I'd rather you say you're not available Than actually make plans with me And say no Because that's a bigger disappointment Than like me expecting to hang out with you And then we don't

Rather than you saying you're not available And I can just make a new plan Yes, because she could be overextending herself We don't know Mm-hmm Yeah Solved Well if you have a question or query

You can email us at our email Nicole and Sashir at gmail.com. We also have a phone number, and if you work at the Langham Hotel, Chicago, and you want to let me be a hotel influencer, let me know. At 323-238-6554.

Let me know with that number. Well, well, stay strong, Langham. Goodbye! Best Friends is a production of Headgun Studios. Our producer is Ali Khan. Our executive producers,

Anya Kanof-Skaya. The show is a edited, mixed, and engineered by Rochelle Chet. Hi, I am Mandy Moore. Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast, That Was Us, now on Headgum. Each episode, we're going to go into a deep dive from our show, This Is Us.

That's right. We're going to go episode by episode. We're also going to pepper in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors. Are we going to cry? Yes, a little bit. Are we going to laugh? A lot. A whole lot.

That's what I'm hoping, man. Listen to That Was Us on your favorite podcast app or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify. New episodes every Tuesday.