Betrayal Weekly - Tracie | Betrayal Weekly

Episode Date: September 11, 2025

A small-town pastor built a loyal group of followers, until an anonymous letter writer threatened to expose his secret life.   If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team, email us at bet...rayalpod@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram at @betrayalpod To access our newsletter and additional content and to connect with the Betrayal community, join our Substack at betrayal.substack.com.      See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is an I-Heart podcast, guaranteed human. Hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong, dance. And then there's your body having its own program. Listen to a slight change of plans on the I-HeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you
Starting point is 00:00:41 get your podcasts. Hi, listeners. I'm Jamal Jordan, the host of Roershack, Murder at City Hall podcast. In July 2003, Councilman James E. Davis, an ambitious rising star in Brooklyn politics, was murdered inside New York City Hall, shot to death in front of more than 200 people. The killer? His political opponent, a man named Neil Askew. The full story of this shocking public murder
Starting point is 00:01:13 and the relationship between these two men has not yet been told. Until now. I want to let you know that you can get access to all episodes of Rochak murder at City Hall 100% ad-free with an I-heart true crime place. subscription, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts.
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Starting point is 00:02:12 subscription, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Plus, you'll get access to all episodes of The Girlfriends Trust Me, Babe, one week ahead of everyone else. Available only to IHeart True Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait, head to Apple Podcasts, search for iHeart True Crime Plus and subscribe today. It's Financial Literacy Month, and the podcast, Eating While Broke, is bringing real conversations about money, growth, and building your future.
Starting point is 00:02:41 This month, hear from top streamer, Zoe Spencer and venture capitalist Lakeisha Landrum-Pierre, as they share their journeys from starting out to leveling up. There's an economic component to community striving. If there's not enough money and entrepreneurship happening in communities, they failed. Listen to eating while,
Starting point is 00:02:59 broke from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, Betrayal fans, I have exciting news to share. Season 3 of Betrayal is now a docu series on Hulu. It's the gripping story of Stacey Tyler and the doctor who betrayed them. See the voices you've come to know in Betrayal, under his eye, streaming now on Hulu. The person that sent these letters out was saying, I have proof. Unless you confess your sins and repent, then I'm going to release some tapes.
Starting point is 00:03:39 I'm Andrea Gunning, and this is Betrayal. A show about the people we trust the most and the deceptions that change everything. A few months ago, we got an email from a listener. We're going to call Tracy. She grew up in the South in the 80s. Her mom was a free spirit. She is a wonderful hippie-like woman. We would just have goats running around and would jump on the porch.
Starting point is 00:04:23 But Tracy wasn't like her mom. She was always more buttoned up. When I was growing up, my mom would lay on top of the roof to get some sun, and she would not have her clothes on. And when I was young, I would be just so horrified by that. And my mom would always say, Tracy, just loosen up. It's okay. But I'm always like, no.
Starting point is 00:04:44 When Tracy was 14, her mom met a new guy and decided to move with him to Africa. She hadn't fully worked out where Tracy would stay, but she had some ideas. She said, you can move to New York with your grandma or you can move to California with your aunt, or you can move to Africa with me, or you can move in with your dad. Whatever you decide. Now, I was 14 at the time. And my dad, I applaud this. he steps in and said, no, these are children.
Starting point is 00:05:14 They are not deciding which state and whom they live with. They are coming to live with me. So she moved in with her dad and his new wife. So very happy, wholesome childhood, except that my dad did drink too much. And occasionally that would cause a little problem. Things at home could feel out of control and at times that made her feel really lonely.
Starting point is 00:05:39 That was until her stepmom invited her into a new community. her church. The first time Tracy went for a Sunday service, it was just so warm and welcoming and something I'd never experienced before. It was a big Southern Baptist church, one that loomed large in their small town. And after a few Sundays there,
Starting point is 00:06:04 everyone knew her name. That was something that I had been searching for because my family is a very small unit and I didn't grow up with cousins. So it just felt like the place I wanted to be. I wasn't even related to these people, but they felt like family, just automatically. The church quickly became Tracy's second home.
Starting point is 00:06:27 She started volunteering and joined the youth group choir. Her dad didn't understand the appeal, but Tracy did. She saw it as a way to break a cycle. Just seeing my dad struggle with alcoholism, I definitely felt like if I, I stay in church, I'm going to end up serving the Lord with someone who doesn't struggle with alcoholism. It felt very safe. By the time she was 17, Tracy was taking notes during Sunday sermons.
Starting point is 00:06:58 I just was one of those teenagers that didn't get into trouble because everything that was preached, I practiced. And the person doing the preaching? He was funny. He was charismatic. He seemed to care about people. His name was Keith. Or at least, that's what we're going to call him in this episode. And when she was sitting in the pew on Sunday, Tracy looked up to him.
Starting point is 00:07:27 I just remember feeling the energy that came from his preaching and his dedication to serving the Lord. I really admired that. A lot of other people admired Keith, too. He'd built his church into a huge community. It wasn't like 30 people in our church. It wasn't this little church where everybody has beehive hair. We had a thousand people in our church. It was principals.
Starting point is 00:07:54 It was the mayor. It was the police chief. Very well-viewed citizens of our town. The church was popular, but it also had rules, strict ones. And Tracy was a rule follower. I am wearing skirts all the time. I don't even wear pants. I don't listen to rock music.
Starting point is 00:08:18 I don't listen to any secular music. That's how deeply entrenched I was. And the strictest rules were around dating. It was very much praised if you made it to the altar and had never kissed. You don't live together. You don't have premarital sex. You don't go to the movie theaters. Tracy's favorite part of the church was the youth group choir.
Starting point is 00:08:42 It was a group of nearly 100 teenagers who would travel all around the South to perform. Our youth group would sing and then Keith would preach. We would go to churches all around, far and wide. I mean, we actually made tapes and, like, sold them. It wasn't a typical teenage experience. Instead of sneaking alcohol with her friends, she joined the church's campaign against it.
Starting point is 00:09:08 Our county was a dry county. And when there was a vote to bring alcohol in, Our church was one of the biggest adversaries to that and made it very loud, took out billboards, had preaching on the corners about the evils of alcohol. The message resonated with Tracy. It was personal. But it also felt like she was part of something bigger. For me, being from a small town, it felt like a movement of positivity. After high school, Tracy enrolled in a college about an hour away. She went for a teaching degree, but she was still active in Keith's church. She went on weekend trips to perform with her youth choir.
Starting point is 00:09:54 After one of those weekend trips, when I returned back to my college dorm, it was about 2 o'clock in the morning, and my answer machine is flashing. So I push it, and it's Keith's voice. And all he's doing is asking, did I get home safely? And could I please call him at his home to let him know I got home safely? Keith, the head pastor, was like a celebrity. Even though she dedicated so much time to his church, she'd never talk to him directly. To talk to Keith one-on-one, he needed an appointment.
Starting point is 00:10:31 And now he was calling her in the middle of the night? I really felt like that was super odd. That had never happened before. Actually, I didn't even know if he really even knew me. Of course, he saw me, but we never spoke. But this was the leader of her church. So she called him right back. I mean, this is now 2.30 in the morning and gave him a call.
Starting point is 00:10:53 And he said, I just really wanted to check on you and make sure you got there safely. And then the conversation switched to, hey, I was just wondering if you would ever consider going out on a date with me. Tracy felt a rush of emotion. When he asked me out, I just started crying. I felt like it was all that I could ever wish for. In Keith's church, asking someone on a date signaled a very serious intention, a holy intention, with marriage as the end goal. I felt immediately very complimented,
Starting point is 00:11:38 that someone who's serving the Lord in such a way would even consider asking me out. This was someone who not only shared her values, but preached them. He's always going to be serving people and caring for others. He's never going to hurt people. I could have a man that's never going to drink too much. He's never going to cheat on me.
Starting point is 00:12:01 It made her feel safe, but it was still so surprising. Tracy had never thought of Keith romantically. He was 35, and she had just turned 20. She didn't really know much about him. I didn't pay any attention to him other than being the pastor that was energetic, charismatic. It never even crossed my mind to think of him in that way. One thing she did know about him was that his wife had recently walked out of their marriage. He was open about this journey with his congregation. She left suddenly and moved in with a younger man and left the kids. Keith had three daughters that he was now parenting on his own. The youngest was only a year old.
Starting point is 00:12:48 It was hard on him emotionally. He really preached a lot about his wife leaving him and how he stays up at night with a baby crying and, you know, the girls cry for someone to be in their lives. A lot of women in the church felt sorry for him. He wanted a partner. So when he asked Tracy out on a date, she knew what it meant. Keith had chosen her. I thought, what better opportunity would I have for a man that could be good in my life? Like, this has got to be it. It's like being offered the best, what else could there be? That's what it felt like to me. They decided to meet for a picnic. On the date, she expected Keith to be strict and chased. No handholding, absolutely no kissing. She'd been following those rules for the last five years. But on the day of their date,
Starting point is 00:13:45 We met and went to a scenic area that was alone, and he actually pushed me down and kissed me. Keith could see that Tracy was taken aback. He tried to explain. Oh, my goodness, I'm so sorry I did this. I was just overcome because I just really care about you. It felt like an impulse that couldn't be controlled. I felt elated. I must be the person he really cares about in order for him to cross that line.
Starting point is 00:14:24 A line that I so carefully for the past four years never cross. After that, they spent hours sitting in Keith's car just chatting. Because he had been my pastor for four years, him talking and me listening was just a natural part of our relationship. And he just told me how much he cared for me. It just felt very safe and I felt very special. It was the beginning of a relationship. From there, we continued to date in a secretive way. for about a year and a half.
Starting point is 00:15:06 Tracy knew that if her parents found out about the relationship, they would have like burn the college down to keep me from being with Keith. My mom and my dad who did not go to church with his wife was very much against it.
Starting point is 00:15:23 In my mind, that would be the most horrible thing that I could tell them would be that I was dating a very conservative pastor. And for Keith, Part of the secrecy was because he wasn't ready to talk to his girls about it yet, even though he wanted to remain somewhat stable to them looking.
Starting point is 00:15:43 So that really played a huge part in me feeling sorry for him and trying to be what he needed to be. They were both willing to do whatever it took to be together, even if it meant being discreet. We'd often drive an hour or two hours to meet like at a rest stop or pick up some food. and eat at a scenic spot. And we did that for a long time. They fell hard for one another. We definitely expressed great love for each other very early on. And I was deeply, deeply, deeply committed to him.
Starting point is 00:16:21 Even though it was against church rules, their relationship progressed physically. We did not cross all the boundaries, but we certainly did cross a lot of them. He just told me that the reason that he couldn't control his impulses with me was because he already felt like I was his wife. She felt like she was breaking the rules, but Keith was the one who made the rules. He knows God, and if God is telling him that I'm the person, who am I to try to figure that out when I don't know?
Starting point is 00:16:55 Like, I don't know what God says. Like, he runs a church. And I can see God answering prayers for him. every week at church. How could I know better? Keith had direct communication with God, and that came with a lot of power. He wasn't God,
Starting point is 00:17:15 but he was the closest thing in our church to God, meaning if he said it, it went. If he thought it, it happened. If he wanted it, it was going to be worked through by all the people in the church to make it happen. There was no questioning. his authority, there was no checks and balances in our church. We had deacons, but the deacons were to do good to the widows and they just followed Keith. If you did question him,
Starting point is 00:17:48 you were quickly moved out of the church by others. Two years into their relationship, Keith said he was ready to make their commitment public. That's when he sat down and talked to the deacons about it. Of course, the deacons approved. And after that, they started going out together in public. She would join him and his children for lunch after church on Sundays. When we went public, I was proud because it felt like I was no longer a secret. And it felt like he was taking a stand on our future together. One Saturday, Keith was determined to take Tracy to the beach for a date.
Starting point is 00:18:31 Shortly after we got to the beach, you know, I heard the plane. and I could see that it was dragging one of those signs behind it, saying, Tracy, will you marry me, love Keith. And then he just pulled out a ring and he said, will you marry me? It didn't actually feel like a question. It felt like the decision had already been made. I felt immediately honored that I could be his wife and we could do this movement together.
Starting point is 00:19:00 And at the same time, I felt like, oh no, is this exactly what I think it is? But it had gone too far, and he had already spoken to the deacons, and it was already public in the church. I just felt like, who am I to question this? If he feels like this is what has to happen, and I love him very much,
Starting point is 00:19:21 then this is what we're going to do. Before the proposal, Keith hadn't talked to Tracy's dad. So when Word got back to her father... My dad was very frustrated, And he felt that there was an imbalance of power and that Keith was taking advantage of his daughter. So my dad had tried to talk to him, but he would not. Since Keith wouldn't meet with him, Tracy's dad decided to go to Keith.
Starting point is 00:19:52 And there was one place he knew he'd be. My dad actually showed up at our church during one of the services. And he walked inside and he said, Keith, we need to talk. And I mean, there's hundreds of people. there. And Keith said, what are you doing? You're interrupting the service. Tracy's dad confronted Keith in the middle of his sermon, while hundreds of parishioners watched in confusion. It was a spectacle. Immediately the deacon surrounded my dad and rushed him out of the church. Later, my dad told me,
Starting point is 00:20:31 he said, Tracy, I want you to know that that was difficult for me, but it was the only way that I knew to try to get his attention and try to let people know how bad I think this is. He said, I actually had a gun in my car and I locked it in my car. So I could not run back and get it. Because if I had my way, I would have used it that day. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body having its own program. I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans.
Starting point is 00:21:33 We share stories and scientific insights to help us all better navigate these periods of turbulence and transformation. There is one finding that is consistent, and that is that our resilience rests on our relationships. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live
Starting point is 00:21:54 with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On a recent episode of the podcast, Money and Wealth with John Hobriant, I sit down with Tiffany the budgetista Aliche to talk about what it really takes to take control of your money. What would that look like in our families if everyone was able to pass on wealth to the people when they're no longer here?
Starting point is 00:22:25 We break down budgeting, financial discipline, and how to build real wealth, starting with the mindset shifts. Too many of us were never, ever taught. Financial education is not always about, like, I'm going to get rich. That's great. It's about creating an atmosphere for you to be able to take care of yourself and leave a strong financial legacy for your family. If you've ever felt you didn't get the memo on money,
Starting point is 00:22:52 this conversation is for you to hear more. Listen to Money and Wealth with John O'Brien from the Black Effect Network on the I'd Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, earners, what's up? Look, money is something we all deal with, but financial literacy is what helps turn income into real wealth.
Starting point is 00:23:12 On each episode of the podcast, Earn Your Leisure, we break down the conversations you need to understand money, investing, and entrepreneurship. From stocks and real estate to credit, business, and generational wealth, we translate complex financial topics into real conversations everyone can understand. Because the truth is, most people will never taught how money really works. But once you understand the system, you can start to build within it. That means ownership, smarter investing, and creating opportunities not just for yourself,
Starting point is 00:23:43 but for the next generation. If you want to learn how to build wealth, understand the markets, and think like an owner, earn your leisure is the podcast for you. Listen to Earn Your Leisure on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, everyone. I'm Cheryl Stray, author of Wild and Tiny Beautiful Things. I'm excited to share that I have a new podcast called Mind Over Mountain. In each episode, I interview athletes, adventurers, and adrenaline seekers to discuss the inner landscapes and life experiences that informed and inspired their extraordinary feats. I also bring a bit of advice into the mix.
Starting point is 00:24:22 So we too can better understand how to face our own seemingly insurmountable challenges. Do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to pull out what you already have inside. We're coming into this world fighting for our lives. All I'm going to do is pull out what you already got inside. We're there to support and celebrate each other. And that's not like your story versus my story. You're going to walk up and over that dang mountain.
Starting point is 00:24:44 You're not just going to put your mind over it. Yep, yep, exactly. And if I can't walk up and over it, I'm going to go through it. Listen to mind over mountain. every Thursday on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Tracy was determined to marry Keith. They set a date for right after she graduated college. And despite her dad's public outburst, he showed up for the wedding.
Starting point is 00:25:13 My dad walked me down the aisle, and that was one of the hardest things he's ever done, he said. But in support of his daughter, regardless of who she was marrying, he wanted to be a there for me. The wedding was on a Sunday night with hundreds of people in attendance, from parishioners to family and friends. Everything was always done over the top. And of course, our wedding would also be over the top. I mean, this was a big wedding, big, big wedding. I had like eight bridesmaids, he had like eight groomsmen. And my little brother was dressed just like Keith, a little white tucks and everything. While they were standing at the altar, Keith surprised her with a personal rendition of a Johnny Mathis song.
Starting point is 00:26:01 Keith got the guitar from behind and surprised me singing the 12th of Never. I'll love you till the 12th of never. And they actually cut a hole in the ceiling of the church and dropped all these balloons down on top of us when they announced that we were husband or wife. After the honeymoon, Tracy moved into the house Keith and his daughters already lived in. She got a job teaching at a Christian school run by Keith's church. and I just dove right in.
Starting point is 00:26:33 So our life, seven days a week, revolved around church, whether it was visitation or bus ministry or running to this church on a Friday night so that the youth choir could sing. Everything revolved around church, and that was our entire life. After the wedding, Keith's life didn't change that much, but Tracy's did,
Starting point is 00:26:53 because now she was the stepmother to Keith's three young daughters. I instantly loved the kids because I felt like they were just being tossed about, given the situation with their mom not living with them. So I was happy to take that on. And I actually thought I am okay with not having children of my own. I'm just going to raise his. Tracy also became the first lady of the church, which had some upsides. You are his wife. You drive the best cars, you live in the big house on the hill, you have inner workings of what his life is,
Starting point is 00:27:33 and you are privy to all of it, and you should be very, very grateful that you're in it. And for the first couple years, that's exactly how it went. I had a lovely time with his family. She even loved the little moments, the everyday tasks of parenting. I would get the kids up for school, and they would travel with me. I taught at the same school that they went to. Then after school, I would bring them home. They would play and do, and I would cook dinner or make something for dinner, and then we'd get ready for church.
Starting point is 00:28:06 So it's just a very busy time, but I felt like I was exactly where I needed to be. Plus, she was able to continue serving the community. It felt like she had a larger purpose. I really thrived in the position as a preacher's wife. I enjoyed teaching in a Christian school. I enjoyed working with people where I could go visit them and bring them groceries and help them figure out how to do their child care or whatever they needed. I was able to help people and live for other people. That was something that I really wanted.
Starting point is 00:28:44 Keith treated her like a prize. He gushed about their happy marriage in his Sunday sermons. I felt very much like he was as devoted to me as I was him. and he would make that very apparent. He would talk about me in his messages. He would use humor about our relationship. He would always brag on me being his wife. As time went on, Tracy started noticing some odd behavior from Keith.
Starting point is 00:29:13 We would pull up and get gas and somebody would pump our gas and they would say, hey, what's y'all been doing all day? And Keith would make up something that we weren't even doing. Like, it just, I started seeing that not telling the truth was something that came very easily to him. And that surprised me over and over. And behind the scenes, she was seeing how he ran the church. And at times, it was off-putting. At first, it was little things. The very movies that he would talk against from the pulpit, we would watch it home.
Starting point is 00:29:51 And he would say that he was studying it. she saw that Keith could be materialistic. So for Pastor Appreciation Day, he would be like, whatever you want. But behind the scenes, he was like, I want this color car made of this model with this kind of seat, and I want this kind of trim, and it needs to have XYZ on it. So I was constantly questioning in my heart, how does this work? Because as you know, I wasn't raised in a church environment. He's the only pastor I've ever had.
Starting point is 00:30:25 It just was contradictory to what I expected life to be with him sometimes. There were other times where his actions really gave her pause. When a church member would call and say their child was in a car wreck, could he go to the hospital to visit them and pray with them? He would say he was busy. And he would hang up the phone and he would say, Tracy, let's go jump in the pool. And I would say, Keith, that church member just asked if you could go see their son who just was in a terrible car wreck. And he would say, Tracy, I can't do everything everybody wants.
Starting point is 00:31:03 I can't be on 24-7. And here I am, 15 years younger than him, going, that doesn't make sense, but what do I know? Every time she had questions about Keith's behavior, this is what she came back to. He knows more about how to run the church. And all was good until about 1996. Four years into their marriage, Tracy and Keith's life was well established. They ran a few businesses through the church, like a summer camp in a bookstore. It was at that bookstore where Tracy began to notice another strange pattern in Keith's behavior.
Starting point is 00:31:47 There was a young lady that worked there who was in high school. And she was very friendly, very sweet, and I enjoyed her company. However, if I walked in and Keith was there, they would instantly move apart. Like they would be close together, like a foot apart from each other, and then they would step away. And I remember that catching my attention because that's exactly how he and I did it when we were secretly meeting. So I just started paying attention. She watched for a few weeks, and she saw Keith behaving strangely every time he was in the same space as the girl. Eventually, Tracy decided to address it with him.
Starting point is 00:32:33 I talked to Keith about it, and I said, Keith, if you feel an attraction to this girl, I want you to remember that she is a young girl and just move on, pray about it, and be done with it. I was conditioned to believe that men cannot help their impulses. And I just felt like I need to remind him to check himself. Tracy thought that conversation would be the end of it. But Keith didn't react well. He would instantly put me in my place and say, I don't know what you're talking about. You're crazy.
Starting point is 00:33:13 It was a very direct accusatory. flip the script to how dare you, to where you're apologizing to him at the end of it, like, oh, I'm so sorry. Like, how could I ever think that? And Keith made it clear. He didn't take orders from Tracy. I'm God's man.
Starting point is 00:33:36 It's none of your business. God will keep me in check. That was his answer. Talking directly with the girl at the bookstore wasn't an option, because Tracy didn't have any proof. She only had a gut feeling. I never said anything to her, of course. You know, it was, I would never.
Starting point is 00:33:56 I would never say anything because I wasn't sure, right? I was just seeing it. Maybe I wasn't seeing it. So that's how the next two years went. During that time, Tracy's gut feeling grew into a certainty. Something was going on. I knew he had an traction for that young lady. I could feel it.
Starting point is 00:34:16 I could even feel when he dressed differently because he was going to be around her. So I would bring those fears or those thoughts to him as rationally as I could and say, Keith, I know you're going to see this young lady today. And he'd say, how do you know that? And I'd say because you're doing this, this, you're wearing this cologne or you put on these clothes. I could tell the difference because I knew him. And I just watched him. So for four years before I even dated him, I observed him every week, many times a week.
Starting point is 00:34:55 And I knew his patterns. And then, most disturbing of all, when we would have intimacy, there was oftentimes that he would call me her name. And she's 16 and 17. And he's 44. The first time that happened, Tracy was horrified and embarrassed. She felt sick to her stomach. When I realized that he actually had a true attraction for someone that was so young, it was devastating to me.
Starting point is 00:35:32 It was such a contradiction between what was being preached and what I saw happening. I actually consider just walking away, walking into the woods and just disappearing because I had no power. I had no credit card. I thought everyone would hate me and blame me. Yet I was just completely powerless. And so the only way to get away would be to just walk away and just disappear. Leaving would mean abandoning everything she built, the kids she'd helped raise, the congregation she loved, the only way she'd be able to walk away, as if she had concrete proof of Keith's actions. It had been very clear that things had gotten out of control, but up until that point, no proof had been put in front of me.
Starting point is 00:36:32 She knew it would take a lot more than her word to prove. bring down God's right-hand man. Tracy felt so trapped that she considered taking her own life. I felt so alone, so ostracized, and I was so doubting my own understanding of exactly what I was seeing and unable to find help.
Starting point is 00:36:56 To give herself a purpose, she became laser-focused on things she could control, like raising the kids and supporting the congregation. I just started throwing myself into what the good was and trying to just ignore the other stuff. And I felt literally crazy. And yet I needed to hold the church together. I needed to not fall apart. I needed to be acting like I was completely behind Keith and saw nothing wrong.
Starting point is 00:37:27 And that worked until Nathan came into the picture. One of the deacons came up to me and told me that he had been receiving letters from someone who called himself Nathan. It was a pseudonym, one that anyone in the church would recognize. It came from a Bible story about a prophet named Nathan who was sent by God to confront King David. King David had committed adultery and he was using his power to hide it. So God sent Nathan to confront the king. Whoever wrote this letter was sending a clear message that even the most powerful leaders are not above God's law. The person that sent these letters out was saying to Keith, what would you do if someone's committing adultery in your church?
Starting point is 00:38:19 And then it said, you are that person. And I know you are. I have proof. In the Bible story, King David immediately acknowledged his own actions and repented for his sins. I feel like Nathan used that parable specifically to give Keith the chance to correct and not make it public. This letter writer also had some leverage. Then it said, unless you confess your sins and repent, I'm going to release some tapes. Letters have been sent to the church deacons and to Keith himself.
Starting point is 00:38:59 But after Keith read the letter, he threw it away. Well, Keith did not take that seriously. He didn't believe that this person that called themselves Nathan really had anything. Tracy saw her whole life on the brink of collapse. No, I'm thinking, it's coming down. This is the hammer's falling, is what I'm thinking. And she believed Nathan, whoever he was. Nathan meant what he said when he said,
Starting point is 00:39:28 I will make it public if you don't, correct yourself. And so when Keith blew off Nathan's demands, our phone had been tapped and the tapes were released. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. And then there's your body having its own program. I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. We share stories and scientific insights to help us all better navigate these periods of turbulence and transformation. There is one finding that is consistent, and that is that our resilience rests on our relationships. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change.
Starting point is 00:40:39 We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. On a recent episode of the podcast, Money and Wealth with John Ho'Brien, I sit down with Tiffany the budgetista Aliche to talk about what it really takes to take control of your money. What would that look like in our families if everyone was able to pass on wealth to the people when they're no longer here?
Starting point is 00:41:12 We break down budgeting, financial discipline, and how to build real wealth, starting with the mindset shifts. Too many of us were never, ever taught. Financial education is not always about like, I'm going to get rich. That's great. It's about creating an atmosphere for you to be able to take care of yourself and leave a strong financial legacy for your family. If you've ever felt you didn't get the memo on money,
Starting point is 00:41:39 this conversation is for you to hear more. Listen to Money and Wealth with John O'Brien from the Black Effect Network on the I'd Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever. you get your podcast. Hi, everyone. I'm Cheryl Strayed, author of Wild and Tiny Beautiful Things. I'm excited to share
Starting point is 00:41:59 that I have a new podcast called Mind Over Mountain. In each episode, I interview athletes, adventurers, and adrenaline seekers to discuss the inner landscapes and life experiences that informed and inspired their extraordinary feats.
Starting point is 00:42:14 I also bring a bit of advice into the mix so we too can better understand how to face our own seemingly insurmounting. challenges. Do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to pull out what you already have inside. We're coming into this world fighting for our lives. All I'm going to do is pull out what you already got inside. We're there to support and celebrate each other. And that's not like your story versus my story. You're going to walk up and over that dang mountain. You're not just going to
Starting point is 00:42:39 put your mind over it. Yep. Yep. Exactly. And if I can't walk up and over it, I'm going to go through it. Listen to Mind Over Mountain every Thursday on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your Hey, earners, what's up? Look, money is something we all deal with, but financial literacy is what helps turn income into real wealth. On each episode of the podcast, Earn Your Leisure, we break down the conversations you need to understand money, investing, and entrepreneurship.
Starting point is 00:43:07 From stocks and real estate to credit, business, and generational wealth, we translate complex financial topics into real conversations everyone can understand. Because the truth is, most people will never taught how money really works. But once you understand the system, you can start to build within it. That means ownership, smarter investing, and creating opportunities not just for yourself, but for the next generation. If you want to learn how to build wealth, understand the markets, and think like an owner. Earn Your Leisure is the podcast for you. Listen to Earn Your Leisure on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.
Starting point is 00:43:48 Tracy and Keith's life was hanging in the balance when someone in their church mailed out anonymous letters. The letter writer called himself Nathan. He said he had evidence of Keith committing adultery. The letter first came to Keith, and then the letters were sent to the deacons to try to put their King David in line. And nothing seemed to have been done. And so then the tapes were released. Whoever Nathan was, he had tapped Keith and Tracy's home phone. He'd been recording the line and making tapes of Keith's private conversations.
Starting point is 00:44:23 The day the tapes were sent out, Keith was nowhere to be found. It happened all so quickly. At this point, Keith is now somewhere in the woods praying. Like, he's gone to a quiet place to go pray. But Tracy was in the eye of the storm. She found out about the tapes when a member of their congregation, a friend of hers, came speeding into the church parking lot. He's like Tracy,
Starting point is 00:44:54 talk to you. His wife, Michelle, was also a friend of theirs and a member of the congregation. Michelle was actually around my age. She would hang around. We all hung around each other. We'd play volleyball after church on Wednesday nights. And, you know, it was just all fun and games. Tracy had noticed something funny about her husband, Keith, and Michelle. He and this woman would back away from each other. And then I started noticing that they would wear the same colors. like on Sunday mornings. Now, Michelle's husband was in front of her with a cassette tape in his hand.
Starting point is 00:45:33 He had received a tape at his office. It was from Nathan. He opened it up. He was like, what is this? There was no markings on it whatsoever. Nothing, it said nothing. And he just popped it into the recorder. He's horrified because he's literally hearing his wife
Starting point is 00:45:52 on these tapes. and Keith in very intimate situations. And so he turned it off real quick, and that is when he came to find me. And he told me what was on the tape. The tapes exposed that Keith and Michelle had a secret routine, one that they kept from their spouses for months. It would happen as soon as I would leave to go to work in the morning. I would take the girls to school, and I would go to my class to teach.
Starting point is 00:46:18 And Keith and Michelle would get on the phone, and that's when they would do this. is when the kids were in school and the spouses were at work. The tapes were recordings of Keith and Michelle having phone sex. On this tape was many, many weeks of spliced discussions between Keith and Michelle. Michelle's husband was horrified at what he'd heard.
Starting point is 00:46:43 He's crying. He's embarrassed. It's very clear that he's as shocked about it as I am. He wanted to listen to the tapes together. with Tracy. I just refused. I said, I'm not interested in listening to it. I don't need to hear it,
Starting point is 00:46:59 but I do want to talk to you about what was going to happen from there. Before they confronted their spouses, Bachel's husband wanted to investigate for himself. He needed to know how far this affair went, and it didn't take long for him to find an answer. He personally had seen the ledgers of, Keith's signature signing in to hotels. This proved Keith's affair went far beyond phone conversations.
Starting point is 00:47:31 It was life-altering for Tracy and also for Michelle's husband. But it had huge implications for the church. I just could not bear it. I mean, we had the most beloved congregation of people that I knew this was going to absolutely devastate. It was time to face the music. But as word began spreading through the community, Keith was missing. It became a very real fact to everyone that Keith was cheating on me and it was someone that was someone that was within the church. It was just full like a firestorm across our town.
Starting point is 00:48:17 Everyone was shocked to find out that Keith was living. living a double life. Everyone except Tracy's dad. He's still lived in town. For years, he'd been waiting for the other shoe to drop. My dad owns the pool hall across the street from the church, so he literally has a front row seat to the chaos that is ensuing. Tracy's dad decided to make the most of Keith's public humiliation. My dad bought 500 bumper stickers that he had printed up that said in bright, bold letters, I am Nathan and proud of it. And he handed him out to the patrons of his business and his friends.
Starting point is 00:49:01 Tracy's dad wasn't Nathan. He was just thrilled someone was exposing Keith. But for Tracy, the public humiliation was more complicated because the night she found out about the tapes, I get a call from the young lady. It was the girl who used to work in the bookstore. She was now in her early 20s, but she was calling Tracy
Starting point is 00:49:26 because she just heard the news about Keith and Michelle's affair. She is as hurt as I am because she thought she was the only one. And now she realizes that he has done this with another woman. This phone call validated Tracy's suspicions from years before. Even though Keith had vehemently denied it, the truth was coming out. He had been romantically involved with this girl, back when she was a teenager. She read to me the poetry that Keith had written to her, and she validated everything.
Starting point is 00:50:07 She said, yes, we did this, we did that, he wrote me this. And she was telling me because she was so hurt that he had done this with Michelle, which is so ironic that I am the wife. They all did it do. Tracy could finally put together a timeline. After this girl graduated high school and went off to college, Keith picked up with Michelle. He spun a complicated web of betrayals, one that damaged and devastated many people. And he left Tracy to pick up the pieces.
Starting point is 00:50:41 She was coming to me from a place of deep hurt saying that she should have told me, you know, two years prior. I really couldn't console her at that point. I was so shocked that I don't remember what I said to her, but I did end up throwing the phone across the room. Since then, I have reached out to her to tell her that she was a young lady that was also manipulated and I tried to help her realize that I have no hurt toward her at all. After the tapes were set out, the girl told her parents about how Keith pursued her, and they went to the police. The young ladies' parents learned of the affair between her and Keith, and they brought a lawsuit against him. But it turned out that the age of consent in that state, she had just reached that age, so the lawsuit could not go any further. When Keith came back from his time praying in the woods, he resumed his position as head of the church.
Starting point is 00:51:41 The church still let Keith preach every Sunday. And the reason they did that was because a manipulator, when they're caught, they don't just come clean. They blame everyone else, and they say that it's been twisted and turned, and they continue to manipulate. And that's exactly what happened. These people did not want to believe that Keith was doing this, even though they were faced with it. Many people in town had the motivation to do what Nathan did, especially the teenage girl and her parents. But they weren't behind the Nathan letters.
Starting point is 00:52:18 So it left a question hanging over the whole congregation. Who was Nathan? At the time, I had no idea. There was a lot of speculation of who it could be and a lot of blaming. Like, this person's probably doing it. In fact, Keith was trying to bring a lawsuit. against whoever Nathan was for tapping his phone lines
Starting point is 00:52:41 because it would be illegal to do that. Instead of sitting through Keith's first sermon back at the pulpit, Tracy got a one-way ticket to California. I felt so much shock and hurt that I didn't stick around for the fallout of it. I flew in San Diego, and I was on the other side of the country with my head in the sand, just trying to breathe.
Starting point is 00:53:08 Back at church, Keith had started preaching a lesson in forgiveness about how Tracy needed to forgive him. During that time, Keith actually announced my phone number from the pulpit and told everyone to give me a call and just beg me to come back. It was the most bizarre and ridiculous thing ever. Hundreds of phone calls, just over and over, just people saying, we love you, Tracy, we're praying for you. Other people would say, how dare you do this to God's man? How can you betray him? You need to get back over there and fight the good fight, just on and on. And finally, the pressure was so much that I decided for his kids' sake and for those people that were hurting, that I could give him another chance.
Starting point is 00:54:00 So after about four months, I ended up going back to Keith. not because I felt like it was necessarily the best thing for me, but I felt like it was the best thing for the church and the people. And I was their preacher's wife, and I felt like I needed to heal all the hurt that had happened through this. Keith also promised Tracy something she really wanted if she came back. If you remember, I had agreed that I would raise his children and not have any of my own. but as I grew through the decade, I started wanting children.
Starting point is 00:54:40 But I just kept pushing it back saying, you know, it's okay, I'll just raise, you know, I'll raise his, I love them. Well, when I left him, that was one of his buying points, is we can have a child of our own if you come back. So she went back. But this time, Tracy drew a firm boundary. I told Keith, I am back. However, if you ever do this to me again, you will have zero access to me and I will not look back. And so she went on, optimistic that Keith would change. But six months later, some people came up to me and said, Keith is having another affair. I said, put proof in my hands and I will leave him.
Starting point is 00:55:31 And that will be it. and I ended up getting proof put in my hands that he was doing marriage counseling with a woman and her husband. He ended up having an affair with her. And that night, I drove out of town. And on Valentine's Day, 2000, I joined the military. I walked into a recruitment office and I said, can I take the ASFAB right now?
Starting point is 00:55:57 That's the entrance exam for the military. They were like, who are you? And yes, yes, come. Come sit down and I took it and because I'd been a school teacher for middle school math at that point, I aced it. She was sent to basic training. Straight from being a school teacher and a preacher's wife to putting my head in the duffel bag and low crawling to go get my food. I joined the military because that was the only way to break away. It was the only way that I knew how to get away from Keith and to do it in a way where I was financially independent.
Starting point is 00:56:32 because being a good preacher's wife, I didn't save a rainy day fund because that means you're halfway out. After basic training, Tracy was offered a position as an officer, but she wanted something more short-term. Because I was 31, I said, you know what? I don't want to do any of that. I just want a short-term enlistment period because I know that I want to have a family one day. So I just joined for three years. And I spent my whole time in Kaiser Slaughter in Germany at Lomstall Regional Medical Center. It's actually an air ambulance, 236 air ambulance. And I had a ball and totally restarted my life.
Starting point is 00:57:20 Met a wonderful man there and we have a son together. Today, Tracy works as a boat captain in a small southern town where she lives with her son. It's been 25 years since the Nathan tapes were sent out. and Keith's betrayals were exposed. But what remains a mystery is Nathan's true identity. No one has ever stepped up and said that they are Nathan. Now I feel like I have a very good idea. And other people have, we've talked about it and we feel like it could be this person.
Starting point is 00:57:52 So I feel 99% sure that I know who it was. At the end of the day, Tracy's never needed to know. It doesn't matter to her who's. Nathan really was. She's just grateful to him for breaking the silence. It wasn't just me. It's all of these people that went through this and have never been told the truth. And I did not stand up and tell the truth for several reasons because I didn't want to hurt them. I didn't want to expose things. And I've been, I would say, brainwashed manipulated into thinking that I am partaking in part of the guilt and the shame if I do speak.
Starting point is 00:58:31 Now it's been 24 years and I can speak. After Tracy left for the final time, Keith kept right on preaching. She got word about how he addressed it with the congregation. He did not address anything. He did not say what had happened. He did not explain anything. He didn't say why I left. All he said was, don't believe everything you're going to hear.
Starting point is 00:58:58 I've heard from other people that he said directly that Oh, Tracy left because she wanted a baby and we couldn't have one. Keith is still preaching to this day. He's built a new building. He has a new congregation. He's remarried. They know nothing about me or all that has happened. The lawsuit, the three women finding his name on a hotel roster,
Starting point is 00:59:26 the tapes that were sent out of him having phone sex. They know nothing about that. stuff. And Tracy hasn't been back to church since. For me, going into a church and sitting, I can see what could be happening in the background. And that's really distracting to me. I wish I had that innocence again of just walking in. But I don't have that anymore. We end all of our weekly episodes with the same question. Why do you want to share your story? I've actually thought about it for a very long time how to ever tell the truth and the story that I have because I felt like it needed to be told. I always felt manipulated and guilted to stay quiet. Even now, there's
Starting point is 01:00:15 a lot of pressure to do that. But I understand that the pathway to peace and understanding is by claiming your experiences and dealing with them. It turned my life upside down, but you move forward and I've definitely learned that I'm stronger than I thought I could be and I believe the truth sets us free. So that's why I decided to tell this. On the next episode of Betrayal Weekly. If this could be true about my brother and I could have no idea, how on earth would I ever know who the monsters were? Before we end the episode, I have some exciting news. Betrayal will be doing our first ever live show as part of the Virgin Voyages true crime crews. We'll be answering listener questions and discussing them live on stage with Stacey and Tyler from Betrayal Season 3, as well as Caroline from season 4.
Starting point is 01:01:24 So if you have a question for us, please email us at Betrayalpod at gmail.com with the subject line listener question. And if you want to join us on the Caribbean cruise, there are still spots available. search virgin voyages.com slash true crime. If you would like to reach out to the betrayal team or want to tell us your betrayal story, email us at Betrayalpod at gmail.com. That's Betrayal P-O-D at Gmail.com.
Starting point is 01:01:53 Or follow us on Instagram at Betrayal Pod. You can also connect with me on Instagram at It's Andre Gunning. To access our newsletter, view additional content, and connect with the betrayal community, join our substack at Betrayal. We're grateful for your support.
Starting point is 01:02:11 One way to show support is by subscribing to our show on Apple Podcasts. And don't forget to rate and review betrayal. Five-star reviews go a long way. A big thank you to all of our listeners. Betrayal is a production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment Group and partnership with IHeart Podcasts. The show is executive produced by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Fasin. Hosted and produced by me, Andrea Gunning.
Starting point is 01:02:36 Written and produced by Monique Labroupes. board. Also produced by Ben Federman. Associate producers are Caitlin Golden, Olivia Hewitt, and Kristen Malkyrie. Casting support from Curry, Richmond. Our I-Hart team is Ali Perry and Jessica Kreincheck. Audio editing and mixing by Matt Dalvecchio. Additional audio editing by Tanner Robbins. Betrayals theme composed by Oliver Baines. Music library provided by Mib Music. And for more podcasts from IHeart, visit the IHart Radio. video app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 01:03:12 Hey, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist and hosts of the podcast, a slight change of plans, a show about who we are and who we become when life makes other plans. I wish that I hadn't resisted for so long the need to change. We have to be willing to live with a kind of uncertainty that none of us likes. You can have opinions. You can have like a strong stance. and then there's your body having its own program. Listen to a slight change of plans on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, listeners.
Starting point is 01:03:57 I'm Jamal Jordan, the host of Roershack, Murder at City Hall podcast. In July 2003, Councilman James E. Davis, an ambitious rising star in Brooklyn politics, was murdered inside New York City Hall, shot to death in front of more than 200 people. The killer? His political opponent, a man named Neil Askew. The full story of this shocking public murder and the relationship between these two men
Starting point is 01:04:28 has not yet been told until now. I want to let you know that you can get access to all episodes of Rochak murder at City Hall 100% ad-free with an I-heart true crime subscription, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Plus, you'll get access to all episodes of Rochak Murder at City Hall one week ahead of everyone else, available only to Iheart True Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait.
Starting point is 01:04:55 Head to Apple Podcasts, search for IHeart True Crime Plus, and subscribe today. Hi, listeners, I'm Anna Sinfield, host of The Girlfriends, Trust Me, Babe. I'm excited to share the Girlfriends Trust Me Babe story with you, and I want to let you know that you can get access to all episodes of season one, two, three and four of The Girlfriends and every single episode of The Girlfriends Trust Me, Babe, 100% ad-free with an I-Heart True Crime Plus subscription, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Plus, you'll get access to all episodes of The Girlfriends Trust Me, Babe, one week ahead of everyone else. Available only to I-Heart True Crime Plus subscribers. So don't wait. Head to Apple Podcasts, search
Starting point is 01:05:41 for I Heart True Crime Plus and subscribe today. Saturday, May 2nd, Country's biggest stars will be in Austin, Texas at our 26 IHeart Country Festival presented by Capital One.
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