Oscars Outsider - Chekhov's Gun (RHONY S14E13 RHOSLC S04E05)

Episode Date: October 10, 2023

In this installment of the Bravo Outsider podcast we dive into the latest episodes of Real Housewives of New York and Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. We also discuss the trailers for Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Real Housewives of Miami. In our RHONY discussion we talk about Ubah Hassan's enigmatic presence the ongoing feud between Jessel Taank and Sai De Silva, the awful mini-golf bar that Erin Lichy found, Jenna Lyons wisdom and Brynn Whitfield stirring the pot. In our RHOSLC discussion we talk about Mary Crosby's antisocial behaviour, Whitney Rose's gamesmanship, Monica Garcia's beef with Lisa Barlow, Angie Katsanevas' sunglasses, and discuss why Meredith Marks is Chekovs Gun. Heather Gay is also briefly discussed Chapters: 00:00 - RHOBH and RHOM Trailers 02:05 - Intro 04:47 - RHONY Highlights 26:58 - RHONY Housewives Ratings 37:45 - RHOSLC Highlights 49:33 - RHOSLC Housewives Ratings 58:14 - Outro Find Dylan on substack at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://dylanferguson.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find "The Devil You Don't" on Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tBassBNwKc&list=PLCGSy4_xHhBsbX0VlG3JDJwaiqsBkiGDj⁠⁠⁠ https://www.bravooutsider.com

So we got two trailers that were released. We had a trailer for Real Housewives of Miami and a Real Housewives of Beverly Hills new season. Fuck yeah. What are your first thoughts on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills trailer? Okay, did Kyle just like pull a tatted up lesbian bad bitch? Is that what was led to believe? Yeah.

Because good for her. Wow, that's awesome. That's so cool. Morgan Wade is. She's like a country singer. She's a country singer too. Yeah. That's so cool.

I can't wait for that. There's promise here. I mean, there's a scene with cowboy hats too. I always love to see that. Yeah, a very expensive horse. So. Yeah.

Very horny for a while there. So that's fun too. Yeah, we get horny Erica Jane. So there's lots of promise. Yeah. Okay, let's have a look at the Real Housewives of Miami trailer.

Right out of gate. This one goes like way. harder than the Beverly Hills trailer for me. The framing is so good. Like just starting with the Catholic shit and then ending with like them shouting on like probably like the Mayan Riviera or like the awkward mariachi bed. Mariachi. Yeah.

Just the way it started and the way it ended was extremely well done. Yeah. And we got like hints at like at least five different storylines going on here as opposed to Beverly Hills where it was really mostly all that we got a. glimpse of was the drama surrounding Kyle. So I'm not going to count like Beverly Hills out. It's just I, I'm way more excited for Miami. And comparing these two trailers, there's, there's a clear winner.

Yeah. It's great to see bits of that, like, that, that Latina, like Catholic-tinged anger coming through. That's particular to the show using turns of phrases like, you know, you're a snake that ate its own tail and I'm immune to your poison. These are just phrases that go. hard. It rules. Yeah, absolutely amazing. Okay, let's, uh, let's get into the show here. Welcome to Bravo Outsider podcast. I'm your host Craig Midwinter. Joining me again is Dylan Ferguson.

Dylan. How's it going? Oh, going good. Going good. A little sleepy this morning, afternoon by this point, but I've got a bit of a red bowl cocktail ago I got. So that should change in the next 20 to 30 minutes. Oh yeah. And we just watched the real housewives of Miami season six trailer. That's like three monsters. Yeah, exactly. That's got to be pumping through your veins right now. Oh, yeah.

Once again, it's a tandem episode. Our guest was unable to attend last minute, but we'll have an outsider again next week. I promise. I'm looking forward to this next run of shows that we've got. Next week we've got Peter Oldring coming on, who is hilarious. One of the funniest people in Canada.

looking forward to having him on. Then the following week, we've got Wendy and Megan from Girls Gone Hallmark, which is a podcast that covers Hallmark movies, which is something near and dear to my heart. And we'll also be appearing on the Monster Smash podcast, where we'll be reading some monster smut, which is a genre of literature that I'd never heard of. Oh, I'm so excited for that.

And then, yeah, then on our Halloween, on Halloween we'll release an episode where we'll have Christine and Claire from the Monster Smash podcast. podcast appearing on our show. So it's going to be a really good run of shows. I'm looking forward to it. Yeah. And you'll want to watch it on YouTube for the Halloween episode because Craig is going to have the most outrageous costume. Just you wait and see. Okay, putting me on the spot here. Now I've got to think of something. We're going to talk about the Real Housewives of New York episode that just aired as well as Real Housewives.

the Salt Lake City. We weren't planning on talking about the Real Housewives of Orange County Reunion. I'm not sure if you watched this, Dylan. I watched it. I thought it was, I thought it was like, it was a pretty interesting

show. I love the set. They did it on one of the sets with like the LED backdrop, so they had like some motion and it looked like they were on a beach. I thought it was just like visually really interesting. and fun.

I thought that Gina did great. There was a great clip where she shuts down Shannon where she calls out Shannon for not being able to name her kids like Jesus kids. Yeah, I thought it was enjoyable. But let's get into the primary shows that we're going to talk about. Dylan, what were your thoughts on this week's Real Housewives of New York? New York. I say this every single week, but this one may be more than most.

Great episode for Jenna. She was spitting wisdom this whole episode. I thought she was very, very wise. She was very, I thought, even keeled. And I thought that the way that she dealt with, like, Jessel and Sy by like kind of taking, supporting Jessel while also being totally like sympathetic to why that's kind of hurtful aside to make no sort of comparisons between jessel's uncle and sigh's mother and um and being like very understanding at both sides and just having some smart things to say i thought

it was a good uh a good episode for that for that jessel was for that jennah wisdom yeah totally i i also really love the scene that we got between uh jena and her her son um just giving us more of her personal story which was kind of the knock at her right over the gate this season was that she wasn't showing a lot of her personal life, but I feel like we're getting that fleshed out now and her talking about her relationship with her mother and how that contrast, the relationship that she has with her son. Yeah, I agree. This was a pretty good episode for Jenna. Yeah, and how she says like the people who give us the least are the ones that we most want, like their approval. That's like, that's wisdom. That's truth. She's spitting truth there.

Yeah. Yeah, you can put that in a fortune cookie. For sure. Maybe another side hustle for Jenna could be Fortune cookies I think that Swingers the crazy golf club which is the full name of the bar they go to is like seems exactly like the kind of place

that Aaron and Abe would invite people to seems incredibly lame to me yeah my first comment on in my notes for that scene was like what the fuck is this place like mini golf themed restaurant with this like really tacky floral decor

is really hard to put my finger on. Yeah, and they call it Swinger. So I assumed it was going to be Swingers themed. And maybe like the floral decor is supposed to be like, you know, swingers like late 60s, early 70s theme. But they definitely didn't like go in for like that like period aesthetic. It was just like kind of ugly. And we have mini putt.

And I'll give props to Jessel as being the one person who showed up fully committed to dressing like it's 1969. you know like she's the one who seemed to really like buy into the idea that we're going to a place called swingers erin says it's a swingers party i'm gonna like have a swingers thematic look you know i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna dress like the the swingers era and nobody else really seemed to try no this this place seemed like you know how sometimes you can tell when someone like has a joke but they've definitely started from the punchline and worked their way backwards it was like when they were planning this restaurant, they started with like the name and the idea to give lame people like

Aaron and Abe the ability to be like, hey, you want to come to the swingers and work their way backwards from that for a restaurant concept. Yeah. Yeah. And when you were leaning really heavily on like just like we have a kid's game that you can play, it's a bad sign like that's if you're using that as a crutch. There's this bar in Montreal that's called the ping pong bar. And I and I hated it so much because the bar that it replaced was like this really cool lesbian bar. And then they replaced it with a place called the pink bong bar. And it was just like the totally lame bar that resembles every other bar, except there's like little white plastic balls that will occasionally fly across your table

and maybe hit you on the head or line in your glass because people are playing ping pong in the middle of the bar. And then everybody's on all fours trying to find the ball. That's just a terrible idea anyways. Don't build your bar around the game unless it's bowling. Bowling works. Darts, okay. I mean, pool doesn't even count because it's just a staple. Yeah, well, where have you been to a darts themed restaurant? I guess there aren't darts themes restaurant. They're just pubs that have darts.

Yeah. They could get dangerous at a restaurant. That can be part of the fun. I've been to a place in Minneapolis that had like lawn bowling on the roof and botchie ball on the roof. And that was, that was good. But it wasn't like the main thing. Like the restaurant's identity wasn't that. Yeah. At least it didn't feel that way. It wasn't like the crazy golf club. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's just now occurring to me that maybe the only called it swingers because you swing a golf club and maybe it has nothing to do with like 60 swing it culture. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. That's totally what it was. That's what you think it is?

Okay. Yeah. Oh. So do you think that Jessel, like me, Jessel assumed that it was like a swingers party as in like we're going to like, you know, pretend it's 1969 and we're hooking up with each other's spouses. Yeah, for sure, because she was the only one. That's the, that's the, that's the whole idea behind the name is that you can like,

pull the rug out from under someone and be like, ha ha, we're playing a minigolf. What did you think? Oh, okay. Yeah, so Jessel fell for it. She fell for the, uh, the gag. Yeah, or she just leaned into it. Yeah, either way props to her. I liked her, her outfit.

I thought it was very like Scooby-Doo. Great job. Um, this was probably like the, the highlight of the episode for me was this whole, this whole scene. Even though like the fight within it was a lot of, you know, Jessel and Cy going over territory that they covered previously in the last lunch. But I thought adding the husbands to that mix added a little bit more interest to the dynamic. Because they got to rehash it with allies present now. It's not just like a one-on-one awkward conversation. now they've got, they're surrounded by potential allies and partners.

Yeah. And so much of this like Real Housewives of New York season is kind of trying to figure out what works for this new iteration of the franchise. And this felt a little bit to me like, oh, I wonder if the men have some chemistry and we can get like something going like we have on Real Housewives of New Jersey where they can like bust their balls and, you know, that's, that's fun. And I feel like Sy's husband tried to do that, but he just, comes across as like such a phony asshole that like you think so didn't land for me yeah i think so i'm i'm kind of starting to like dave honestly that's his name right oh yeah yeah i think it's kind of started like i think the the point where he looked uh worse i think in this episode was when he asked

uba like so why are you single like he tried to he he set it up in a way that tried to be like really complimentary and gentle but it's still like a question that i think you don't ask a woman like just why are you single anyways um or anything but one really. Yeah. Yeah. Or I mean, yeah, you could phrase it in a way like, so are you somebody who would rather not be in a relationship or I don't know, but just saying the words, why are you single? It's like it risks offending anybody. Yeah. There's always that risk there. It's, um, but I think that Dave does come off as somebody who is like actually very, very supportive of his wife. And, and like the fact that he got like size mother's paintings made and it's like a little professional book as a gift. that's really thoughtful. That's a really sweet thoughtful thing. Oh, that was him that did that? I didn't realize that. Yeah, that is thoughtful. I thought that was touching. And he was like, you know, when he's like describing saying that like why he loves science, because she's the most honest person he's ever met. It felt like more like, it felt kind of

passionate and heartfelt. He feels like somebody who is like a strong ally and like really like fights for his wife. So I think that's why I like him. I think that when he first started showing off in the show, he really rubbed me the wrong way he seemed like a dushy guy but i i think that just seeing like how like supportive and and apparently loving he is of size i mean it's a small sample size so we know will he just more to judge but based on this past episode i thought we saw a lot of indications that he is like a very a very strong partner who's like very supportive and stuff yeah so that's why i'm warming up to him because of that i mean a lot of what we've seen from him lately has been in comparison to Abe who actually comes across

as a way bigger asshole in my opinion like some of the comments that he said at the first double date dinner that they had where he's like oh yeah I'd be fucking someone else like that's how you're going to present yourself on TV like you're not you're not funny yeah and then again like

at this one Abe made some comment about how he like just loves receiving oral from Aaron like you're going to put that out there in front of your your friends and the cameras and like, I don't know. He comes across as a dick.

Oh, absolutely. I 100% agree. Yeah. Just like, I'm always asking for blow jobs. Every morning. I'm just like, you know, why don't we put on the 1973 Grateful Dead Live album? You can just give me an old BJ.

And sometimes if I clean the dishes, she says, yes. Very like lame energy coming from both of those too. Yeah, totally. Uba's response to Dave's question about why she was single was really good. I loved her, like, maybe into it. Like, let's all close our eyes and ask God in our own language. Yes, it's close our eyes. Speak to God in your own language.

I love it. Because it could either be sincere or just mocking him for, like, asking the question. Either way, it's hilarious. I think it's both at the same time. Yeah. Yeah. But, yeah, like, again, the husband chemistry. here is just not

doing it for me. As soon as they get away to the golf course, the mini golf course, they're like two feet away. You can see them in the background of the shots between Jessel and Sye arguing. And they're like, oh, let's toast to being away from our wives. Like,

what year is this? It's almost like sometimes you see on these housewife shows when you've got a partner on there. They are putting on way more of a front than their wives on this because they're like, oh, what if someone I know sees me? I got to make

sure they don't think I'm gay for being on this show. Right, right. Like, that's kind of the energy that I get from some of the people that show up on these shows. And yeah, that was totally what I get like, oh, let's pretend to be you know, the masculine guys that like, oh, the wife's such a drag.

Yeah. Hey, a blue ball. That's for you, Pavit. Yeah. Yeah, there's something about the the Jersey husbands that like it works because I feel like they more often will kind of let their guard down maybe I think like the the key to that dynamic is Frank because he is so like he totally challenges what you think when you look at those guys and he's able to like be very like emotionally vulnerable and like in touch with his feelings and is in like a kind of non-traditional situation with Dolores.

And so there's something that kind of like challenges your view of these guys. But they also like have kind of that fun part of the ball busting that you get when you're in a like a good group of guys. And it makes it a lot more interesting to watch than, you know, these guys that are making the same like stupid street jokes about like my wife such a drag. Yeah. Because if the cameras weren't on, they'd probably be like, hey, Pavit, you got, you got, you got a, you got. a number for the people you go see in Vietnam because maybe I'll go. Yeah. So this was another thing. So do you think, what do you think is worse? Like pretending to flirt with Abe at a function like the Val renewal function or implying that Pavit is like a sex tourist and going to exploit people? What's worse?

I mean, like I've said before, I think pretending to flirt with AIDS. or flirting with Abe, because again, I think that it's like a false distinction between pretending to flirt and flirting. It's a mushy distinction anyways. I think it's funny and cool, and I don't think that Aaron should have been that upset about it.

As far as implying that Pavitt's doing sex tourism, I'm still not convinced he isn't, to be honest. I think he finally was able to give a reason that's a little bit better than just I want a ban me or I want points, which is just that I just want some fucking time to myself. Which he didn't like say it that way, but that's kind of like what the answer they got out of him.

That it seems like a somewhat more realistic reason than the other like bullshit reasons that were given. Is it a strong enough explanation to dethrone he's doing sex tourism as the most likely explanation? I'm not sure. But it's a stronger challenge. then I wanted to eat a bad me. So at first

when he was kind of going over his explanation at this dinner I was like oh this the story just keeps on evolving and changing and it's making me believe it a lot less than I did you know last week week by week it's kind of eroding my confidence in him

but then at the end of this scene where he's trying to navigate this question about like why do you love your wife and he's like just really struggling to like yeah say something that works and then again we get a scene later where he the scene where he calls side bipolar it's like he just is not good at these social situations and it's so awkward it it made me believe his explanation more like okay there is like something there that he just wants to like not want to um not want to say, but it's not nefarious. He just like is trying to find a way to

navigate this and is not able to. Yeah. He definitely really stumbled to this episode. Like, yeah, it was really a bad look when he is like, has to follow up Dave and Abe and come up with a reason for why he loves his wife so much. It is like, yeah,

she doesn't ask too many questions. Yeah. All the phrases he comes up with are just some version of like, she's not too much in the way. Which is really just such a bad look. And especially because Jess laughter is like, oh, that's so sweet.

Like tries to sell it. It's like, no, Jessel, we heard the actual words he said. Sorry. It did not come off as that sweet. But I am willing to believe, yeah, that he's just like maybe a little exhausted with his life and just sees this as one way that he could just like spend some time away from his wife and kids and have an excuse to like not answer the phone and like not be there. Maybe he's just like that fucking fed up and doesn't and can't think of another way to do it.

Another way to get out except for being like, um, cheap plane tickets. I got to get these for the points. I'm going to sit in an airplane for three days. It's like that's the best you could come up with as a way to just get the fuck out of the house. I don't know. That's the best explanation. And when that's the best explanation, it's not a great look for. him. And yeah, and it was also, like you said, it was like a bad look when he goes into attack

and he should be attacking Cy, right? Like that's his job. He absolutely, a side's been, been going hard against Jessel. It is his job to defend Jessel and to attack Sai. He absolutely should be attacking Sye there. That's his job as a husband. He should not be doing it with like DSM5 language. He should, he should have, he should have just said two-faced, you know, you should have trotted out the word bipolar. It's like, you can see him just like, you know, he's like, all right, here's, I'm going to say my bit. And then he says it they're like, oh, you should retract that. And he's like, yeah, go ahead.

Let it. This is what happens when I try. But this episode definitely like solidified Jessel and Pavitt's place on this show for me because I need to see more of this really uncomfortable dynamic that they've got. And, you know, I think that Jessel handles conflict in a. compelling way. Like it's compelling to watch her kind of pick and choose what she wants to really respond to and dig in. And also she's got that lack of self-awareness that I think is key for being a, like one way that you can be a really good housewife is to lack some self-awareness. Like we see that

with like Luanda Lassups is like that. And well, there's too many housewives. lack self-awareness to name them all. But I think that she possesses that. So yeah, she's a lock for next season for me. She does have an awkwardness, which is kind of entertaining. And like when she's trying to describe, like, why she's so shocked by what size is doing, and she keeps saying like, it's like she just like turned a leaf and it's like just changed from one minute to the next after we got back from Anguila.

And everybody keeps saying, yeah, but she was angry at you and Inguila too. And she's like, well, I don't know, maybe. I settled on the idea that it just came out of nowhere when we returned to New York. So that's what I'm sticking with. Yeah. Another thing that I thought was notable here was when AVE was talking about why he loves Aaron, he was talking about how like he wants to be with someone who isn't boring. Like ultimately it's like, I wanted someone who isn't boring.

And it's like you got the most boring person in the room sitting next to you. I mean, I think compared to Abe, yeah, sure, Aaron is a fascinating personality, but compared to the average human being, let alone the average person sitting in that room, yeah, she's boring as shit. They're just a boring couple. That's part of, that's part of their charm, really. Yeah. Just a couple of boring dorks. It's starting to, like, resonate with me why, like, he's such a target for Bryn to, like, bust his balls by Florida. with him. It's because he's like he's so flat and and boring and you know sometimes you just kind of

make a target out of yourself. If you like have no personality or you're not knowing how to respond to a situation, it's fun to like like poke at someone like that. So it, uh, yeah, it's starting to the picture is starting to fill out. For sure. Sometimes like the funniest like kid to tease is the one who doesn't react very much. It's like when you like make funny faces at your dog just they kind of stare at you. Like, it's like, the one who isn't going to know how to react is, is going to be the funniest target for, like, for joshing with or flirting with. Yeah.

I guess next week we'll probably not get very much of Janice and she's going to Scotland or something, which is a little disappointing that she's not going to be present. But, uh, Uba, we got to see a fair amount this episode. and she's hawking her hot sauce, which is a housewife business that I very much appreciate. Yeah. I love how they like, I love how we get to see behind the scenes of that kind of branding fiction

where you have like a branding partnership, but you have to pretend like it's a collaboration. And like we have to pretend like this special burger they make is like a collaboration between Uber and the restaurant. And then we got the seat of them being like, let's get in the kitchen and see if we can cook up something together, bounce of ideas off each other. they go in the kitchen and it's like he's got his whole sandwich already made like it's already

been all prepared in advance and he just assembles it like just puts a couple things together it's like oh how about this wow it's so good like awesome co-lab guys a real meeting of the minds there um pretzel bread is really good though but it's uh another like side of uba's adorable lack of connection that she's like they have this thing called pretzel bread Yeah. It was like she had to collaborate with like the site that invented pretzel bread in her mind. Do you have any other highlights from this episode of New York? I kind of did a double take when like Jenna's glasses shopping with her son and the saleswood's like,

it's Japanese acetate. And she's like, oh, why is that good? And he's like, it's organic. I was like, that makes sense. sense? It just kind of felt like just throwing out buzzwords. I actually did look up Japanese acetate after because I was like,

is there any ways this makes sense? And I guess Japanese acetate is a kind of plastic that's not petroleum based. So maybe he meant organic in the sense that it's not petroleum based. Still felt kind of like it was just like, I'll just say a buzzword. Like, yeah, the lenses are vegan. Let's just go over to the tail.

See the price tag that's carbon neutral. Before we move on to Salt Lake City, I'm going to spring this on you. I want to try this out, see if it sticks. Let's give each of the hostwives a score out of 10 for this episode. So let's start with Jenna. Just for this episode. Just for this episode, yeah. Yeah, 12.

12 out of 10, okay. You know I love my Queen Jenna. Yeah, okay. And the head of the fan clip. I gave her a seven. Oh, yeah. But yeah, I mean, there's root. I thought she was, she was good.

She wasn't like the one of the standouts for me this, this episode. But she was good. There's room to improve from that. Next up, we got Bryn. So, good line well read about the bit like, you should be poking holes in people's story. It's the only places you should be poking holes is in rich guys condoms. It's a good, it's a good joke. She delivered it well.

So just based on that, because I'm struggling to think of anything else she did this episode, it's nine. A nine? Yeah, sure. Yeah, I gave her an eight. There was that line that stood out to me that I really enjoyed. Plus when she was kind of relaying information back to Jessel at the end there. And then in the confessional, she got, am I stirring the pot?

Yes, but that's what you need to do. And I thought, like, yeah, you know the job. You're doing the job. I appreciate that. Again, not like, not super key in a lot of scenes here, but it was enough to earn an eight for me. Plus, we're getting more of that. We're getting more of that confessional look where she's dressed like Jackie Kennedy for some reason.

So sure, that gives me high barks too, I guess. Yeah. We've seen, like, I feel like we've seen comparatively few confessional looks from Bryn versus the other women. So, yeah, not sure what's up with that. Cy. I like Cy's anger. I like that she brings anger to the show.

Yeah. Whereas most of the people don't. I do, I do like her, her attacking Jessel. I do like that. I, I like her with her aunt too. That was her aunt, right? In the house, yeah. They've got good rapport.

They seem to get along really well. I think Sai is a pretty good argument for that. There is something to the idea that like the kind of like loudmouth, always slightly angry New Yorkers are actually like living in a very healthy way. there there there there there there is something like uh like dave would say that is like like very honest and i appreciate that and i i yeah there's like a high energy that's like verging on to like a negative angry kind of energy coming from side which i like i think that's cool so i thought uh i i like the way that she attacked jessel honestly i i don't think she she went pretty hard

but i don't think it was like totally out of line um i think she she kind of has she's right, I think, to be a little upset that Jessa would bring up this thing about her uncle's alcoholism and compare it. It is kind of apples to oranges, as she says. Not the expression I would have chosen there. Mostly because it's an expression I just don't use. I don't like the expression apples to oranges. It doesn't make sense to me. Because if you're saying like these two things cannot be compared, well, you know it, it's very easy to compare apples and oranges.

They're both fruit. They're both like the two of the most popular. fruits that are often eaten in the same settings, you know, lunchtime snack, juices, eminently comparable. People do compare them all the time. Oranges are much better. The expression should be like, it's like comparing refrigerators to Macronesian island states or something.

I don't know. It should be two very different things. Anyway, but to bring back to the point, I think Cy's anger is like pretty justified and not totally out of lied and kind of entertaining and refreshing and seems kind of honest. So I give her a high box too. I'll give her eight. Okay. That's,

I gave her a six similar to what you were feeling in terms of justification, but I just seem to be grading lower than, than you are on a whole. So these numbers will normalize as we work this out, I think. You know, if we continue doing this thing, which is a fun exercise. I think we'll kind of land on some stability in these scores.

But next up, we've got Aaron. Yeah. I mean, you know Aaron's the one I like the least. I think I haven't really hidden that fact. Yeah. What did she even do this episode? I mean, yeah, admitted she gave a blowjob in the morning. Other than that, I mean, she hosted the party, I guess.

She picked the worst fucking bar in all of New York City. to host a party. One. Yeah. You get, okay. So I gave her a five. And the only thing that like gave her a passing grade for me was one for offering up her mouth the ape. And two, I thought that she had a line, I think it was in a confessional or maybe it was in that that scene at Swingers where she was like, everyone's got a drunk uncle or cousin. And that really actually like it was, it was funny the way she delivered it.

which is something that we don't often see from her. But also, I feel like that kind of put into perspective-sized feelings about this. Like, you know, I think when I was viewing things, I was viewing them more from Jessel's perspective and being like, okay, she's trying to find a way to connect and people are just mean-girling her. But this is like, yeah, I guess that is like kind of different because, like, you know, a lived experience where you're the person that is raising you is, struggling with this would be hitting so much more close to home than, you know,

drunk uncle from the S&L bit that you see at Thanksgiving. Right. I do think in Jessel's defense, I do think I remember her saying that she lived with her uncle for years too. Right. So I think that if he wasn't necessarily the person who raised her, she did spend, I think, a lot of her childhood or maybe early adulthood or some combination of the two. I think it was like when she was, went to school in New York, when she moved to New York to go to

Okay. Like as an adult or as like a as an adult. high school. Okay, yeah. So that's actually not the same thing as a parent. But I mean, it is somebody she had, she was living with. So in her defense, it's not like the same thing as like, oh, Uncle George shows up at a function twice a year and and passes out. Like, though I think Jenna, again, put it better when instead of like impugning the fact that it's just an uncle when she said like upsy, yeah, but that's her mother, you know, like just putting it. that Forsyad was her mother. Like, like, that's, uh, um, that's a different situation when it, when it, when it's your mother. Um, yeah. Uh, how about Uber?

Uh, I mean, again, that praying moment was just a classic bit. Yeah. Another, absolutely classic bit from her. Uh, looks like we're going to get some more, uh, maybe secrets coming out, secrets. I don't know what the secrets. She's got to do it in Connecticut, maybe. Um, I mean, yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, just based on,

her response to Dave's question, that's a knockout right there. I'll say nine. Nine. Okay, I gave her a seven. But yeah, I think high marks for just being there and being Uber. That's like, that's all she needs to do. That's all she needs to do. And she did it. She did it well. So yeah, she just has to be in the room, say something very weird every once in a while. Yeah, just bring her her energy. yeah totally okay and finally jessel um so like she made for a good source of entertainment i think as you're alluding to because she's kind of not handling her shit very well but i have to dock her marks for not handling her shit well uh i think she's reacting uh poorly um just like not she's struggling to come up with like a counter narrative like to use against side that's like coherent and and cutting like, you know, she should be having a, just a strong story about like how like,

Sai has no right to, to talk about my husband that way. You know, she just needs like a strong, like, through light of like why Sai is doing something very inappropriate so that she can rally her friends around her and be like, we have to talk about how size is like out of control and inappropriate and stuff. She's just not reacting strongly, not reacting well. Again, marks for the outfit. It ruled. but not necessarily for the performance.

I'll give her a three. Okay, wow. I gave her an eight. Yeah, I liked. The fact that she was like involved in all this drama is automatically going to like give you a mark at least a four. If you're totally getting owned, I still think that you need to get at least a four. And I don't think that she's like, she doesn't feel like she's being owned in this. even though she's not handling things well,

and she's kind of coming across as playing things weak, which is something that I criticize Real Housewise, Orange County, the newcomer Jen. It still is like engaging to watch her navigate this in kind of this disorganized, like, way. It's compelling to see, you know, how she's going to like ping pong through this situation.

And one of the things is like a lot of, the attacks that Sai has been trying to make against her just like they might hit but they're not like sticking and she's just kind of like okay well whatever I I don't really have the the self-awareness to like internalize that and like process it and like really

really be hurt by that I don't know that's so yeah I just think that it's it's been fun to watch or navigate these situations. So I gave her her innate here. All right. Strong divergence of opinions there. Yeah. I see what she made.

Okay. Let's move on to Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. What were your highlights here? Yeah, this was another pretty sweet one. That like skin scan technology off the batch when they're like going to the skin care place and they have like this like Mission Impossible setup. That shit's so fake. I love it though.

Yeah. It's just so funny to me. Also how Lisa is just like talking all lightheartedly about like how she was like banned for life from her like previous like spray tan place or whatever like in front of the employees at the place where she's going to for the first time. And you can just imagine those employees just be like, oh fuck. Like who did we just take on as a client? Just like, yeah, they banned me for life from the other place.

That's why I'm here. Lisa's so funny What else? I always got to dig back into the memories when we do Salt Lake City It's so long ago Mary's just one of the most antisocial people I've ever seen on TV

It's hilarious Every fucking thing she says to somebody It's like wow, you eat a lot Yeah. Like, what were you thinking with that necklace? Just like, that's all she ever says is just like, and everybody's just like, okay, thanks, Mary. Great to have you with us. I love the power of Mary, though.

Like the fact that she, you know, criticizes Heather for this necklace and like Heather feels the need to like justify it and try to like sell this decision to Mary. Like she feels like, it's like, oh, I've got to like really sell this. and Mary's just like, no, you really missed with that one. Yeah, like nothing you're going to say, Heather is going to make it. There you go. Like, yeah, you're right. You know, it's not too bad. No, like, don't bother trying.

Like with Monica, too, Monica, like, wants to be Mary's friend. Like she says that in this episode, it's like, this is not going to happen, Monica. You don't have to. When she's like, wow, you just eat a lot, don't you? You don't have to be like, yeah, I guess. I guess I'm hungry. No, she's just going to respond with, do you like pay attention to what you're eating? Yeah.

I hope there's a vegetable. there. Yeah, I could use Mary in all of these shows, every episode of every housewife show, could use Mary just like just being there and refusing to be anybody's friend or say anything remotely polite or nice to anybody. It's great. What other highlights did you have? What other highlights did I have?

Angie's still just being hilarious with the way that. And like her, she has the one one character note that she's Greek still doing that thing. We're just like trying to open a champagne bottle. And she's like, I don't know how to do this. I only drink Uzo. They're like, good a dance or something. And she's like, I only do Greek dances. Like, okay, yeah, we know what country your, your nationality is.

Thank you. Ski shots is really stupid. That's a terrible way to do shots. Always new shots are terrible. it's terrible way. Man, what else happened this episode? So one of my highlights was the scene that we got between Whitney and Monica, where they have lunch.

And I just really like the dynamic that we saw between Whitney and Monica. It was like, on one hand, it was like Whitney sort of trying to play a little bit of, like, hostwife mentorship. But towards the end of this episode, it seems. clear to me that she is building, she's trying to build a faction and she's got like the people that she's trying to build a faction with include Lisa and Monica and it's not going to work for her if they are like at odds with each other. So this is like a little bit of gamesmanship and through doing our podcast, I've kind of like come to realize some traits that like I really love

seeing in a hostwife and um one of the main ones is someone who isn't like perceived as a strategic housewife but i feel strongly is like Whitney or gina i feel like they're very strong at the the kind of game of it all and so i thought we got to see gameplay from Whitney at this lunch that i i really enjoyed um so that that would have been like one of the the standouts for me yeah i mean I think there's a lot of gamesmanship from Whitney, to a point where it feels very, like, businesslike, I feel like, with her lunch with Monica when she's, like, using expressions. Like, I'm just wondering if I want to invest time in the sort of friendship where, like, just using, like, very, like, business-oriented language regarding her developing relationship with Monica, which I always just kind of curdle when somebody's like, hey, I'm your friend. And I'm going to speak to you. Like, we're, like, maximizing our time for efficiency.

It is impressive that Whitney kind of gets Monica to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, about, uh, about the, about, uh, about Meredith's, uh, rumors, uh, concerning Angie's husband that she, like, oh, yeah, that she, that she actually, that she, that she actually, that's, like, like clear. Like Monica's like, oh, you,

you haven't heard, really? Like, I feel like everybody has heard. Everyone knows what it is. And Whitney's like clearly trying to get her to say it on camera. I was like, no,

I haven't heard. All I know is that there's are rumors. I just feel like if somebody do, they, I wish they would say something. Like she got it to a point where she had enough like, um, just,

enough deniability in the situation where she can be like well as soon as i heard i came and i i told you about this and like like she had like clean hands in the situation so she got on camera like learning about the information and immediately like turning it loose which like yes you're going to get you're going to get blood on your hands for releasing this information no matter what but like the fact that she is able to do it in a single like bound. She doesn't have that stigma about like holding on to the information and using it strategically. Even if that's actually what happened, she's got this like she's got out there that

she learned about it. She dealt with it right away. It adds to her like to her story of being, you know, kind of a truthful and good friend and like doing what's best, even if it is, you know, it's both. bullshit and it's something that she's architecting. Yeah, yeah. Definitely cannot wait to see what happens after now that we get another presumably supercharged Angie Meredith confrontation because the last one was so good.

So I can't wait to see that again. Plus, I think Angie's going to like start like shooting laser beams out of her visor at Meredith. So that's going to be cool. I love Angie's sunglasses. And as a Star Trek fan, I was very happy to see the Jordy LaForge look that week on. That was excellent. What's a more Greek, Jordy La Follopolis? I don't know.

Yeah. Any other highlights from Salt Lake City? Nothing that's really springing to mind. I'm mostly just like really excited for the next one. Yeah, this really set things up for next week. There were a few. other moments that I had written down. I loved, you kind of mentioned

the Mary's comments about Monica eating, but we got a really great montage of that from the editors. I love that. There was a really weird edit of, I think Lisa yelling, yo, give us a beat to the DJ, which was

really funny to cue up the dance party. And then we got a fight about Snoop Dogg. So great little cameo from Snoop Dog in this fight. Yeah, and then again, lots of fun sort of dialogue that takes place next to, you know, people in customer service positions or like, because we got both that scene that you'd

mentioned where they're at the spa, but also when they're fighting right in front of the, like, the crepe, the crepe station and talking about who works hard. And Monica being like, these guys work hard too. And then the reveal, like the zoom out to reveal that they're like right in front of the table where all the crepes are being made. It was really funny. Yeah. I mean, she's right too. Like, Monica's got a point.

Like, yeah. Do you really think you work harder than like the people making the craps? I'm not sure. I also do like Lisa's line where she's like, I work hard and there's a byproduct of working hard. And it's called money. Why is it a byproduct? What's the main product then? Like you just accidentally make money on the side?

will you're like I guess I don't know the sense of accomplishment I suppose is the made product I don't know yeah satisfaction and a job well done for sure of all the important things that you're bringing to the world there was also the moment where they were like informing Angie they're breaking the news to Angie and they were they they have a little bit of a bicker over is it nip it in the butt or is it nip it in the bud and it's definitely bud it's definitely bud it's a very very common mistake though yeah um yeah it's like um it's similar to uh to to champing at the bit which is often said it's chomping at the bit when it's actually champing oh that one i didn't know yeah it's a horse specific expression champing oh yeah or um another another common one is saying tender hooks when it's actually tenter hooks

with another tea. Oh, I don't think I've even heard that expression. Like when you leave somebody on tenter hooks, like when you leave them in a vulnerable situation. Oh, okay. People always say tender hooks. But I do always enjoy like a little like, animological aside in the middle of like a high tension argument.

That was really good. That was really good work by, I think that was Monica who just like saying. Yeah, I think so, right? Like, yeah. Yeah, I also had an. note about what we're seeing a little bit more of Angie's house and

it is so sterile like it looks like a lab in a science fiction movie like a cheap science fiction movie on like sci-fi network everything is all white with the one exception being this like massive

shelf full of blue ribbons in her daughter electa's room with a bunch of like horse statues it's a sci-fi lab where they manufactured Greek beards. Yeah, any other highlights from Salt Lake City? That's about it for this week, I think.

Okay, let's go and give these girls' ratings as well. Let's start with Lisa. Classic, yeah. She's funny. She's iconic. Very unself-aware and very just, it just has. great line. So I give her, let's go with a

eight. Okay, that's in line with me. Meredith. I feel like we didn't, do we get a lot of Meredith of this episode? I feel like we didn't get too much. We didn't get a ton. So, she's just kind of meandering about the party, and that's

about all that we saw. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure she'll give us lots of great shit next episode, but for what we see here, since I don't really even remember much of her, let's just say, straight down the middle. Okay, I gave her a seven, which I think is maybe a bit high in retrospect, but I awarded above a five, and I'm going to justify this mark a little bit.

But as soon as we knew that these rumors were things, she was like a source of tension, even if it was indirectly. Like, she was the gun that was waiting to go off in this episode that we're going to see next. So I might adjust this to be a six because you're right. We didn't really see that much. But yeah, I'm okay with that. I'm excited that she's in the room. It was like gave me a buzz.

Yeah, she's Chekhov's gun in this episode. Exactly, exactly. Whitney. She did a lot. A lot of conniving, a lot of scheming. Interested with her stuff with her daughters too. actually that was kind of not too not too bad she seems to be a lot

she seems to almost want her daughter's bullying to be worse than it is like she seems to be more worried about it than they are in a way that she wants Oh that was Heather right? Heather oh yeah yeah oh yeah sorry sir I'm getting my getting my shit mixed up yeah you're right what was um there was

Wendy was making some reference to her past though yeah so she was talking about some trauma that she's got in the past that hasn't been clear what exactly. Okay, I was going to ask you about that. Because, yeah, she seemed to almost be insinuating that she was, like, abused as a child or something. I was wondering, is that something that she's talked about in previous episodes or not? She has talked about that on previous seasons, but it's always been just kind of insinuated that there was abuse when she was a child. Okay.

Yeah. I do appreciate her working hard. I feel she leaves me a little cold a little bit because like I said I find it a little too like nakedly business like in some in some senses like just not genuinely emotional. It just like just like very like calculating like a like very strategic. I'll give it a six because there's definitely a lot that she's doing and I appreciate that she's she's bringing a lot to the episode. Okay.

Yeah. I gave her a nine because I I really don't care. that it's so nakedly naked gamesmanship. I think that the show has enough texture that it doesn't feel like I'm watching a game. It still feels like someone kind of being strategic and how they're managing a truly social situation as opposed to trying to navigate a game, which is one of the things that makes Housewives more fun than watching an actual game like Big Brother. It's like there isn't an end game it is all just you know it's all just positioning it's all the just like the meat of it so um yeah i i gave her a nine here because we got to see a lot of it we got to see her like really

managing a new housewife which was something that was fun to see this last season on new jersey as well where we got you know we got rachel and daniel and specifically daniel being kind of like manipulated by Teresa and Jen. That was very, very compelling to watch and I was getting a bit of that in the dynamic between Whitney and Monica. So, yeah, this was a good episode for Whitney in my books.

How about Monica? Yeah, I've been waltly a little bit about Monica. You know, I liked her a lot at the start. I think she's been making some dubious decisions in terms of alliances. But I did like her in this episode. I do like her still kind of standing.

up to Lisa, you know, mixing it up with Whitney in terms of the information about Angie. She's getting their hands dirty. Yeah, it's pretty good. Let's say, you know, a seven. There's still a lot of goodwill that I have towards Monica as a character and bringing something different to the show than what other characters have. Yeah, I gave her an eight. Yeah.

Similarly, I think like there's room for an improvement. there, but still she's very likable. And, you know, even if she was having her strings pulled a little bit to be active here, I thought that it was still fun to see. And we got, like, a good little scrap with her and Lisa at the, in front of the crepe table. I think that, like, you know, Monica and Lisa's story this episode are so, like, um,

inextricably tied to each other that, you know, I gave Lisa an eight. I'm going to give Monica an eight. I feel like they both deserve that. Yeah, it's fair. Heather.

Uh, yeah, so we did have Heather's conversation with her kids, which was kind of interesting. Um, and.