Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - 2nd Date Update PODCAST: BREAK and Entering

Episode Date: August 22, 2018

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Crime was committed, blood was spilled, and the cops were almost called. Wow. But through it all, a seed of romance was planted. Could it be the start of an incredible love story? Or the start of an incredible murder investigation? I guess you'll find out in your Second Date Update right now.

Moving 92.5 Brook and Jubal's Second Date Update There are two letters that are guaranteed to make every date more exciting. I'm not talking about S&M. Those letters work as well, but I'm talking about a little B&E, a little breaking and entering. A what?

That's right. What? That is the way to spice up any date. And that's what happened to Maria on her first date, and that's why she thinks she might not be getting a call back today because she broke into a house on her first date.

What's up, Maria? Hello. How are you? Are you a criminal right now? No, it's not what you think. It was my own house. Oh, that's what criminals always say. Yep, you just stopped at a house. You're like, oh, I promise that's my stuff.

I got to get my TV out of there real quick. But your email said that you think you might not be getting a call back because you had to break into your own house? Yeah, I mean, it was a whole thing. Do you want to know what happened? Yeah, first off, tell me about the guy. How'd you meet him? Well, I met him on Bumble.

Oh, yeah. I've heard good things about Bumble. I'd you meet him? Well, I met him on Bumble. Oh, yeah. I've heard good things about Bumble. I have a couple of girlfriends using it. Yeah, it's nice because the girls have to start the conversation first. Mm-hmm. Oh. And you only have 24 hours to do it, so it's kind of like all or nothing, you know? It's like Tinder, but you don't have a bunch of pervy dudes hitting you up nonstop, right?

Exactly. Yeah, you kind of eliminate the pervy dude situation. And he seemed pretty cool and we ended up actually talking on the phone which people don't do anymore. Right. And he seemed really smart and he had a really cute laugh

and so he asked me if I'd like to go out to dinner and I said... And you were like, hell no, let's break into a house. That sounds way like, hell no, let's break into a house. That sounds way more fun. Yeah, I actually offered that, but he was like, nah, I'd rather not. So you guys agreed to go out to dinner. How'd that go?

Well, he came to my house to pick me up, and I got out to the car, and I realized that I didn't have my keys. Oh, no. That's a worse feeling. So this is where the breaking and entering comes in. Is your house easy to break into? Oh, no. No, of course not. I walked up hoping that the door would be open still,

but I'd locked the handle. And we tried all the windows, tried all the doors, and we ended up having to break one of the windows to get in what how long did this take you uh it was a little over an hour that's a great start to your date why did you have to do it right then why didn't you say like hey i'll call a locksmith let's go out have our dinner and then when we get back maybe I'll call a locksmith. Let's go out, have our dinner, and then when we get back, maybe we can schedule a locksmith to meet us. Well, yeah, when you say

it that way, it sounds really smart, but for some reason, that's just not what we did. It's just one of those moments where you're like, screw it, we gotta get in there right now. Break a window. Right, yeah. Did you break the window or did he break the window? He broke the window. Like a gentleman does. Right. He found a rock and chucked it at the window or did he break the window? He broke the window. Like a gentleman does.

Right. He found a rock and chucked it at the window and broke it. Oh, my gosh. So did you end up getting into the house after the broken window? Please tell me you did. Yes. Thankfully, my cat was okay. She wasn't anywhere near the window.

And then, like, I mean, it was really dangerous, but he climbed in the window then. Oh, man. Yeah. Really sweet and nice of him to do. Here's the best part, though, guys. He got in, and he unlocked the door, and I got in. And then I spent, like, 15 minutes searching the house, only to realize that my keys were in my purse the whole time. Are you serious? That sucks.

You didn't dump your purse out before you spent over an hour trying to break into your own house. I mean, I swear I looked in there like two or three times and they were not there. What was his reaction to that? I mean, I just kind of tried to play it off. Like, it was funny, right? That's funny. I would have had a laugh at it. I mean, I could see it being a funny situation, especially on a first date.

Right. I mean, that's one of those things that you're like, you know, when we're married, we're going to look back at this and be like, oh, gosh, remember when Maria left her keys in the house? You didn't say that to him, did you? No, I didn't. Okay. I just said, oh, gosh, sorry.

Yeah, it'll be cool when we're married. Because I was going to say, if you drop the married thing on him, that might be the reason he's not getting back to you. No, I swear I didn't use the word marriage. Okay. So were you able to salvage the day at all? Well, at that point, we'd spent pretty much our entire date trying to break into my house. And he'd cut himself a little bit on the window. Of course.

Not bad. Like, he didn't need stitches or anything. Oh, my gosh. But we just kind of decided to call it, and we said that we would meet up sometime next week for a real date. So he was bleeding after spending an hour outside your home. Kind of a waste of your appetite, I think. Did you guys ever meet up?

No. Really? That was the last you saw of him? Yeah. So I texted him a couple times, and one time he didn't respond, and then another time he was like, yeah, you know, we'll catch up sometime. I'm just really bogged down with everything at work right now. Do you really think

that he wouldn't be calling you back just because you guys had a break into your house and you forgot your keys? I don't know. I mean, it seemed like we had fun with it, you know, and we made light of the situation and I totally assumed that he would hang out with me again. And so I'm just

having a hard time understanding if that's really what it was or if there's something else. All right. Well, we'll play a song. Come back. Call them and get your second date update, OK? Thank you.

You're welcome. Hang on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning's second date update. If you're just tuning in for today's second date update, Maria is on the phone with us. She had a very interesting first date with a guy named Aaron. They spent the whole date breaking into her house. She thought that she forgot her keys when he came to pick her up.

She searched everywhere. Ultimately, it ended with him breaking a window, crawling inside, cutting himself, and then opening up the door. Only for her to find out that the keys were actually in her purse the whole time. That's the only reason you can think of, Maria. Nothing else on your date. up the door, only for her to find out that the keys were actually in her purse the whole time. Oopsies. That's the only reason you can think of, Maria. Nothing else on your date. No other reason why he wouldn't be calling you back. There was nothing else that happened that I have been able to think of.

When he left, he said, I want to reschedule this. Yeah, I mean, I said, let's hang out again. And he said, okay, great. Oh. Yeah, so it seems like you want to see you again well he did cut his hand on your window maybe he got an infection and is no longer with us could have happened god i hope not well we'll find out right now i'm gonna dial his phone number okay okay all right here we go hello hi i'm looking for Aaron. Yeah, that's me. Who's this?

Hey, what's up, Aaron? How are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. From who? Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. It's a radio show. Okay, yeah, yeah. So you've heard of the show? Yeah, I've heard of it.

Okay. Have you ever heard of the show? Yeah, I've heard of it. Okay. Have you ever heard of the segment we do called the Second Date Update? No, sorry. Oh, that's okay. You're going to get very familiar with it because you're a part of a Second Date Update now. What? It's a segment we do on our show where if you go out on a date with somebody and then end up not calling them back afterwards,

they email us to see if we can get you on the phone and ask what went wrong. So a girl named Maria emailed us about you. Oh, okay. That's the excited voice, right? Yeah. She told us a little bit about your date. It didn't sound like much of a date, just breaking into her house, basically, when you came to pick her up.

Oh, my God. Yeah, that did happen. But she also said that you're to pick her up. Oh, my God. Yeah, that did happen. But she also said that you're not calling her back, and at the end of that experience, you guys had sort of made plans to go out again. Yeah. Yeah, it just doesn't seem like it's really a great fit. You know, like, it seems like, I don't know,

I don't want to be mean, but it just seems like it would be kind of hard to actually date her. Why is that? I don't know. It just feels like we're on different levels, if that makes any sense. Is it because you had to break into her house because she forgot her keys that were actually in her purse? No, no, it's not that at all. That was actually pretty great. I don't get to break a lot of windows. That was really fun.

You did think that that part was the only part, really, of your whole date. You had a good time with her. Yeah, if every girl wanted me to break into her house, I would totally be fine with that. That's a fun adventure. Seems like an exciting time. I thought the blood would definitely be like,

well, I cut myself and I'm leaving. I assume it was super minor and she had bandages. It's not a big deal. Okay. So then what's the reason that you're not calling her back? Why don't you feel like you're on the same level or whatever you said? Well, so while we were around like one of the sides of her house trying to find a window to get into, we were talking.

We were trying to salvage a date out of this. Right. And this is the first time we've talked in person, And we were talking. We were trying to have, like, salvage a date out of this. Right. And this is the first time we've talked in person. So we were chatting. You're having, like, first date get to know me conversation over trying to jimmy a window open to get into a house. Yeah, we're just making, like, small talk or whatever. So we're talking about TV shows that we're watching.

And we both love Game of Thrones. Okay. Which is my favorite show. I'm not going to spoil anything. But we were talking about it, and she said something that seemed kind of weird early on. She just said, it's weird that a thousand years ago people had to worry about getting eaten by dragons. But she was joking, right? I mean, that was being silly. That's what I thought. So was joking right i mean that was being that's what i

thought so i laughed i thought that was funny and she heard me laughing and she was like what dragons are bad just like that just like that so she thought dragons were real at this point i don't know what she's thinking i like is this some sort of, is she messing with me? Is this some test? Will you break a window? Do you think that I think dragons are real? It's all some elaborate first date test. So I don't know. So I'm sort of feeling it out, and I laugh, and I think we're having an okay time.

And she keeps talking about what this time period would have been like to live in, not this universe, this time period. She actually said Game of Thrones is my favorite period piece. So maybe she just used the wrong wording. There's no way she actually thinks it's a reenactment from real life. As far as I can tell, she doesn doesn't think like there were cameras there, obviously, but she thinks it's like based on a true story like that.

No. She got into like how it's weird that wizards and witches just like aren't around as much anymore. Like at any time, did you explain to her that game of Thrones is made up and it's not a documentary? Look, man, if she thinks that's true, then I don't want to break her heart. I don't want to crush her and tell her about the terrible world. And if she's messing with me, I don't want to admit that I'm fooled.

There's no win situation. Yeah, I guess you're screwed. Hey, Aaron, I do want to let you know, though, that you might have crushed her. What do you mean? I mean that she's actually on the other line listening to this conversation. And she might have just found out that Game of Thrones is not real. Maria, are you still there? I'm not stupid.

I know that Game of Thrones isn't real. It's not a documentary, but it's based on true events. I mean, I hope you're messing with me. I hope that this is just a really good joke. No. It's like the Renaissance, you know? It's like that show

Vikings, you know? Like, what are you trying to say, that Vikings aren't real? Vikings are real uh they they existed dragons did not exist well they don't exist anymore because humans killed them what are you talking about maria okay are you guys screwing with me are you all you all on this prank thing? No, we're not at all. I promise you, Maria wanted to call you to find out what went wrong on the date. I should have known with the window you guys were sitting. Somebody was setting me up.

This whole thing. This is not a setup. I promise you. Maria, do you really think that dragons existed? They did. I read history books about them. Sci-fi and history books are not the same thing. That's what I'm saying.

I'm not dumb, guys. I know that the Game of Thrones story is dramatized, but dragons actually existed in the Renaissance. You can read about it, and witchcraft and wizardry was a thing. Well, that part's true. Sort of. I don't know which books you're reading, Maria, but I want to read them. It's in tons of books, and you can start by reading the Bible because it's got all of that.

Wow. All right. I know that they exist, and I have proof. You don't even have to read the books. Like, I'll send you the Wikipedia links that I found. And you can read it yourself. So you're serious? You really believe this?

100% I believe with all my heart that dragons used to exist. And I'm afraid that they'll come back. Oh, my God, you guys. Science is not a belief system. It's the Bible. Read it. Are there dragons in the Bible? Well, Maria, what do you think about that being the reason that Aaron's not calling you back?

Because he disagrees with you on the whole dragons being real things. I don't like the tone of this whole thing because it feels like everyone's making fun of me. But Aaron is the ignorant one. I'm not making fun of you, Maria. I just, I haven't read what you've read and I'm not as educated as you on the subject so I can't claim to know anything about dragons. Well, you should do that because it's an interesting subject.

I will. At this point, I would like to ask Aaron though real quick. Aaron, would you like to go on a second date with Maria? We will pay for it. I mean, at this point, I don't know if she wants to go on a second date with Maria? We will pay for it. I mean, at this point, I don't know if she wants to go on a second date with me, but I'm kind of curious where this goes. Are you being serious?

You want to go out with her again? She's fun! Dude! You know what? I'm up for it. You only get one chance in life to have this kind of fun, right? Maria, would you like to go out with Aaron again? Yeah! You guys can hash out the whole Game of Thrones thing in person.

If Aaron is open to hearing me out and reading my books, then yes, I would consider going out with him again. Aaron, can you promise to go into this next date with Maria with an open mind about dragons? Absolutely. Wonderful. Congratulations, Maria. You got mind about dragons. Absolutely. Wonderful. Congratulations, Maria. You got your second date.

I love you guys. Thank you so much. No, Maria, thank you. Thank you for today's phone call. That was awesome. Broken Jubal in the morning. A lot of people are texting in at 78592 saying that dragons do exist and we're all wrong. What is going on? My mind is

starting to hurt. I don't know if I should be more scared that dragons might actually exist because they're scary or I should be scared that people actually believe dragons exist. We're talking about today's second date update. If you missed it, Maria wanted to call Aaron. They spent their entire first date breaking into Maria's house because she

thought that she forgot her keys. Aaron ended up getting his hand all cut up by smashing a window only to find out that Maria's keys were in her purse the whole time. And when we got him on the phone, he said that while they were trying to get into her house, they were talking about Game of Thrones, and she legit believes that Game of Thrones is real and dragons were real.

She said she even has proof of this and that we're all closed-minded and ignorant for not believing that dragons actually used to fly around the world and burn people with their fire breath. Yeah. Wow. It's pretty crazy. Yeah, it is.

Also, you guys know Stranger Things is real, too. Hey, you know what? I got a couple potions that I could sell her that will protect her from those fire-breathing dragons. She will buy them. If she needs them, she should call me. Surprisingly, Aaron actually wanted to go out with her again,

though, despite her crazy history lessons. Well, maybe he can actually educate her. I think that this could be a good thing

for everyone. He knows that she's super crazy, and crazy people are always good in bed, so that's what he's excited about. Remember,

if you want to do a second date update, all you have to do is email the show, and we will call the person who didn't call you back. Moving 92.5. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

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