Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - 2nd Date Update PODCAST: Mr. Lawyer

Episode Date: February 27, 2019

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Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you by the IHOP Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal's Second Date Update.

Today's second date update is an extreme second date update. Ooh, exciting. I don't mean extreme like they did something extreme. I mean the fact that they've actually been out on like three dates, I guess. So it was not a first date that went bad. They've been out three times and now the dude is not calling her back. So that's extreme. Or a fourth date update is maybe what we should call it.

Whatever it is. Tash is on the phone, and Tash wants to talk to us about it. What's up, Tash? How are you? Hi, guys. I'm good. How are you? Good.

I wasn't even sure if we should do a second date update with you, because technically, they're usually like a first date that goes bad. But you've actually been out with the guy you want to call three times? Yeah. So I don't know if you would count that as a second update, but I was kind of hoping you'd make an exception. It's against the rules. Yeah, it is against the rules.

So, bye. You guys need to make the rules. We'll see you later, Tash. Yeah, I think we'll get in trouble with the FCC if we do it the wrong way. There's got to be lawyers out there listening who might sue us if we do a second date update that isn't based on an actual first date. I'm really sorry about that. Wait, are you guys being serious?

100% serious there, Tash. We're never serious. Definitely. No, not serious at all. We'll do your second date update, even though it's not really a second date. Tell us a little bit about the story, though. What's the guy's name? His name is Robert.

Okay. And where'd you meet him? It's actually a really hilarious story how we met. Probably not. Probably not if you started with that. But go ahead. So I was giving flu shots at this law firm. And I gave him a flu shot.

And he gave me his number. Oh, okay. Like I said. He liked the cute nurse. Not the most hilarious thing I've ever heard. But cool story. I just thought it was funny because he gave me his number, you know? Okay.

Hysterical. You gave him the flu and he gave you his number, you know? Okay. Hysterical. You gave him the flu, and he gave you his number. But that's exciting, though. You're a nurse, obviously, and you're going to be going out with a hot lawyer. I hope you're a nurse. I hope you're not just showing up to random offices getting flu shots. Are you a nurse? No, honestly, I'm not officially a nurse.

I'm a volunteer, but they give you this course that you can do legally, like whatever. Really? I didn't know that. I always like a volunteer, but they like give you this course that you can do legally, like whatever. Really? I didn't know that. I always thought I was getting my flu shot by somebody official. Maybe you are. Maybe you're not.

I don't know. Well, risk I guess I'm willing to take. Well, tell us about Robert. How have you guys gone out three times and now he's blowing you off? Well, so like a little bit about him is like he's a lawyer. So I was dating a lawyer. Go me. So we went out a couple of times at a bar and then once he took me to this really nice restaurant.

Okay. That was the last date you guys went on? It was the fancy one? No. We did a bar, nice restaurant, and then a bar. Okay. And were they all really good dates? Yeah.

And he was a gentleman, so he paid for everything. And also, if you're wondering, we did fool around. But I'm proud to say not on the first date. I made him wait. Okay. So the second date? Yeah. The second date and then it was all the way.

A girl never kisses and tells. So I think we got our answer there. Did you go back to his place? Yeah. Well, so, okay. He's smart and handsome and he's got a very nice condo. Like, really nice. Lawyer, so, yeah.

I feel like he just kind of got me, but lately he's just been MIA. Like, I can't get a hold of him, and I just don't understand. Maybe that's the problem. He got you, and that's all he wanted. Yeah. You understand what I'm saying? Do you get what I'm saying by that, Tash? I just want to make sure you're tracking with me there. Is this another

flu shot joke? No. I'm saying maybe he just wanted to hook up with you and then he did and that's why he's not calling you back. Oh, yeah. I mean, I've heard of guys who do that before, but he's definitely not one of those guys. Well, and the thing is, is he's a lawyer, so he's obviously really busy.

I'm sure he's like billing a hundred hours a week and he's making time to see you three different times so feels like he would like you more than that yeah but like he's successful and he's super hot and so like maybe he has his pick of lots of beautiful women and i'm just this chick who gave him a flu shot yeah a chick who gave him something else yeah there is one other thing though just because like i know that he's like i said he's a lawyer and he's hot and successful like i don't know if maybe he is dating other people as well and there was just this one time where i came to his door right and he made me wait like 45 seconds before

he let me actually come in so like he was was there, he said, hi, hold on. And he made me wait like 45 seconds. So I don't know if he was putting away pictures of other women or he was like finishing up a phone call. Did he actually like open the door and then close the door and tell you to hang on and then open it again? Correct. Yeah.

Okay. That's kind of weird. A little sketch. Maybe this place was dirty. Maybe he was just trying to clean it up. Yeah. Maybe he was cleaning up, but it just, it kind of seemed sketchier than that to me. Probably because he was watching porn and he had to turn it off.

No. Who knows? What did you say? Like, that's a 45-second activity to turn off. It makes sense to me. When was the last time you talked to him? It was about, like, six days ago. Okay, and how did that conversation go?

It was, like, I texted him and and he responded like a really brief answer, and then I texted again, and he never responded. Okay, so he just kind of like just left basically. Yeah. Okay, well, we'll try to figure it out. We'll play a song and then come back and call him and get your second date update, okay? Thank you guys so much for doing this. You're welcome.

Hang on. Don't thank us yet. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the Morning's Second Date Update. I'm excited about today's second date update because we haven't been sued for one of these yet. And hopefully today we can finally get sued for a second date update because we're about to call a lawyer.

And I think that's great. So Tash, thank you for making that happen for me. Hopefully we can get you another date though. Yeah. Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah, no problem. All right. Can't wait for the lawsuit. Can't me. Hopefully, we can get you another date, though. Yeah. Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah, no problem. All right. Can't wait for the lawsuit.

Can't wait to see if we can get you another date, too. If you're just tuning in, Tash is on the phone, and she wants to call a dude named Robert. Robert is a lawyer they actually met when she was giving flu shots at his office. They have actually gone out three times, and now he's just blown her off, and she can't figure out why. So, we're going to call him and see if we can figure out what's up. Anything you want to say before we call him? Good luck, me.

Good luck, me. A little pep talk for yourself. I mean, I know he's like hot and he's a lawyer, but did you feel a special connection with him? Definitely. No, I just really, really liked him and I definitely felt like he was really into me, which was great. Right. That's always important. And I already told you guys, he has this

really nice condo. Right. Which is definitely a reflection of who he is. Nice car, nice condo. Yeah. Alright, well, I'm going to dial his phone number right now, okay? Oh, I'm kind of nervous. Me too. Both of us are excited to talk to him for different reasons.

Alright, here we go. I'm praying for a lawsuit. Hello? I've got to speak to Robert, please. Yeah, this is Robert. Hey, what's up, Robert? How are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. Okay.

Okay. Do you know what that is? Sounds Vaguely familiar I figured you didn't know based on the very long Pause when I said my name It's Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning It's a radio show Yeah I've heard of you guys

Thank you I don't listen but I've heard of it I retract my thank you As long as you've heard of it I'm, well, I retract my thank you. I mean, as long as you've heard of it, I'm good. Yeah. What's this about? Oh, okay. Okay, I forgot.

I got sidetracked. We do this thing on our show called a second date update. That's where if you go out on a date with somebody and then end up not calling them back after, they can email us to get you on the phone and figure out what happened. Okay. Okay, and so we got an email about you from someone who you've actually been out on a few dates with. Really? Yeah.

Her name is Tash. Oh. Ray. Oh, okay. No, that's not good. No. Not good? Tash isn't good.

I think it's better that I don't see her anymore. So, yeah, I think that's a, yeah, I just, I can't. Is there a specific reason? I mean, she said she really liked you. You guys went out on, like, three dates. No, no, I think that's a – yeah, I can't. Is there a specific reason? I mean, she said she really liked you. You guys went out on, like, three dates. No, no, she's great. I mean, you talk to her, you just let her know that it's just a big misunderstanding, and I'm not quite sure how to fix it.

Okay. I mean, from what you're saying to me, big misunderstanding, can't see her anymore even though she's great. Are you cheating on somebody? Oh, no, no, no, saying to me, big misunderstanding. Can't see her anymore, even though she's great. Are you cheating on somebody? Oh, no, no, no. Nothing like that. No. Okay.

Well, it sounds like you feel bad about something. I kind of do because she's very pretty and funny. Okay. So you said to tell her that you're sorry that you can't see her again. If you guys could just tell her that I'm sorry, I can't see her again. But that's what I'm saying is if you like her enough to be like, you're really sorry about it and feeling bad, don't you think you should give her a little some closure

so she knows why you stopped talking to her? Okay. So on our first date, it seems to be going really great. And then she just says out of the blue that she's just really excited to go out with a lawyer. Okay. I think a lot of girls would be. You's just really excited to go out with a lawyer. Okay. I think a lot of girls would be.

You think she was only concerned with you being a lawyer, like she just liked you for your job? Well, the thing is, if she's really excited about me being a lawyer, that's the sticky part, because I'm not. Oh. Oh, what? What do you do at the law firm, then? Yeah. I work in maintenance. So I was just, you know,

staying in line with everybody else to get my shot. She just assumed that I was. And I didn't realize that she didn't know that I wasn't. I mean, I would have told her the truth, I swear. But if you could have just seen her the way she lit up when she's like, she seems so happy about the lawyer thing. You know, like, I, I, I, I thing you're like okay so you just went with it yeah i had to she didn't seem like she'd be happy about dating a maintenance guy like just the way she was talking and she was gushing about it and i i was just all

of a sudden like the tunnel vision hit you and you're're like, well, what do I do? What do I do? And so I just, yeah, I kind of went with it. Okay. But I didn't expect her to want to go out with me again. And I talked to one of my buddies at the firm, and he actually, he let me borrow his, I can't believe I'm telling you this. He let me borrow his condo and his car. What? Oh, yeah, because she mentioned that you had a really nice place and a really nice car. You took the lie that far that you're borrowing someone's house?

I didn't know what to do. I was just, I mean, I liked her, you understand, I liked her a lot. And I just, I didn't think she'd like me back. If I wasn't, all of a sudden, at this point, I'm stuck. So I just tried really hard to look and sound like a lawyer, and that's what I did. Aw. I mean, I feel i did oh i mean i feel horrible now i mean i just i can't keep this lie going it's just it's just too much yeah i know how that feels to keep a lie going and you feel bad about it because i've been keeping a lie going

for a few minutes now and i feel bad about it because guess what she's on the other line listening and wants to talk to you wait what do you mean? I mean she's on the other phone line and wants to talk to you. Tash, are you there? What's going on, Robert? Are you really not a lawyer? What? That's the first thing. Just come clean.

God, no, Tash. I'm a lawyer. At best, I clean lawyers' toilets. Oh, my God. Wait, is it also not your condo? It was really nice. No, it's not my condo. You know that one time you came over and I made you wait a few minutes?

I was actually taking down my buddy's pictures of him and his fiancée. Thank God you lied to me. Yeah, I'm really not proud of any of this. I mean, look, just to clarify, I never told you I was a lawyer. You kind of came to your own conclusion on that. Admittedly, though, I never stopped it. So it's still a huge lie. I just, I don't understand why you did this.

It's like I said before, I mean, I like you a lot. You're probably one of the most amazing people I've ever met. And I'm a janitor and you're like a nurse. I mean, you got like a really great job. Just, you're awesome. Robert, I'm actually just a volunteer. I'm not really a nurse. That's right.

Oh my God, what did you guys talk about the three times you went out? Neither of you know anything about each other. Actually, she did ask me a lot of lawyer things. I mean, last time that we hung out, you were actually trying to get free legal advice, and you get to ask about your parents' will. I'm like, I'm going to have to do some more studying because my brain was raised. I couldn't Google fast enough. You're literally lying.

You're acting like you're texting, but you're Googling legal terms. Pretty much. Yeah. I'm just so blown away by this. I can't believe this is happening to me. Now, are you more upset that he lied to you or that he didn't trust you enough that you would be okay with what he really did? Um, everything you said.

Okay. All right. So, all right. Well, would you like him if you knew that he was a janitor? Would you have gone on a date with him? I don't know. I just, I... Sounds like a no to me.

Is that what you want to be your whole life? Absolutely not. I mean, doing this to pay the bills. I enjoy watching lawyer TV shows, and I was thinking maybe I might go to school to probably try to actually become one. Hey! But, you know, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta work. probably try to actually become one. But, you know, I got to work. I actually really like those shows, too.

So you're kind of like pre-law then? Pre-pre-pre-law. Yeah. I mean, I guess you could call it that. I mean, I'm really, really interested in going to school for it one day. There you go. Okay. That changes things. Okay. Oh, wow. All right. So, it one day. There you go. Okay. That changes things.

Okay. Wow. All right. So, Robert, let me ask you this. Would you like to go on a, I guess it would be a fourth date, but I'll say second date just because that's what I say. And I can't get out of my flow or I'll get all messed up. Robert, would you like to go on a second date with Tash?

We'll pay for it. You can find out what she actually does for a living too. I would. I mean, like I said, I think she's great. Awesome! Tash, you said yes, you could have a date

with somebody who's pre-law now, just not a lawyer. You want to go? I mean, yeah, I'd like to go out with a lawyer in training. Yeah, you know what they say.

Date a law student, marry a lawyer. Yeah, exactly. I guess, hold on, real quick, Robert, I do have one question, because, like, when are you going to take the bar? Is that coming up? I heard you. Yeah, exactly. I guess, hold on real quick. Robert, I do have one question. Because, like, when are you going to take the bar? Is that coming up?

I heard you have to, like, take that test. He's probably got to do some Googling. We'll let him Google that and find out. But in the meantime, congratulations, Tash. You got a second date. And, Robert, congratulations. You got a date as well. Yay!

You're the best! Yay! Thanks, guys. This is unexpected. This is totally awesome. Yeah. Congratulations. You got a date and you're the best. Yay. Thanks, guys. This is unexpected. It's totally awesome. Yeah. Congratulations. You got a date and you're officially pre-law.

Broken Jubal in the morning. Ugh. We're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini because you know

you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of

your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline Podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest

appearances from Behind the Bastards Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts from.