Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - 2nd Date Update PODCAST: Target Date

Episode Date: May 8, 2019

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John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more.

Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You've got to check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. 1.4 billion dollars in NFL quarterback contracts the untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history I'm AJ Stevens vice president of client strategy at Athletes First introducing the Athletes First family podcast the quarterback series my co-host Brian Murphy Athletes First CEO

and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Moving 92.5. Rook and Jubal's second date update. The girl on the phone to do a second date update today spent her first date in my own personal hell. Uh-oh. Chuck E. Cheese? No. Worse than that for me.

Really? We spent an afternoon together at Target. I love Target. Are you kidding me? I know you do, but as a guy who's had many girlfriends who like to wake him up Sunday morning when he's hung over and go, let's go to Target and walk around for a while. It hurts me to my core to have to talk

about this. Her name is Lucia. She's on the phone right now, and apparently, yeah, for her first date, her and this guy went to Target. Lucia, how you doing? I'm good. How are you? Oh my God. Did you, like, go on your date and then come back with, like, the best curtains and that candle that you didn't know that you needed when you left Target? No, that's not what happened.

That's why it takes 17 hours to go there. Oh, they have such good stuff. Lucia, how does one go on a first date to Target anyway? Well, in my situation, the guy's name is Terrence. I met him at a work function, and asked me out and I said yes. So I waited a few days and hit him up and said, hey I'm going to Target do you want to come? And he said yes. That's impressive because you would have said, ah you know I'm super busy today, but maybe we could go to dinner or something sometime. Well I feel like you dinner, you know, pressure comes with dinner and it's like, then you gotta think what you're gonna talk about and do the whole thing.

Well, how was the date at Target? I thought the date went really, really well. We had a lot of fun. We looked at quilts and lots of... And then I suggested that we go to the movies, which was next door. Okay. Okay. Okay, so then you turned it into, like, a legit date. You didn't just go shopping for a half hour.

You guys did the movie, too. Well, that's what I do. I invite a guy to Target. If I like him enough, then, you know, we'll continue after Target, go see a movie. You said this is what I do. Does that mean you take all of your dates to Target? Yes. Really?

I mean, well. I've never heard of anybody taking a date to Target ever. Well, when you're dating someone, you're trying to find out what you have in common. And when you go to a restaurant, it takes about an hour. It takes much longer. So if you go to Target, you can figure that out in like 15 minutes. I guess, yeah, you can tell what kind of stuff they want to see, where you go to Target, you can figure that out in like 15 minutes. I guess, yeah, you can tell what kind of stuff they want to see,

where they want to shop, what kind of clothes they like. You can do all that. That's what I'm telling you. I think it's awesome. If someone doesn't like Target, then you know right away it's not going to work. I will say there's a lot of opportunity for good conversation starters, right? Exactly. You see things that spark your interest. Hey, do you have this in your house?

Hey, oh, funny story. I burnt something on using that iron, you know? I mean, some people meet at Starbucks to see if the conversation is good over coffee. You just like to do it over Mossimo or whatever they sell there. So did you guys end up going to the movie? No. He said that he had to go because he didn't have any time. Oh, so he wasn't feeling it then.

Well, I believed him, but then when I hit him up a few days later, he never responded. So he hasn't said anything to you since your Target experience? No. Uh-oh.

Did he seem bored or did he seem fully engaged and having fun? I know when we got to the DVD section, we had a bunch of laughs there. I bet. Talking about all the different kinds of movies you've seen. I thought it was a good date. Do you think he thought it was a date or he was just hanging out with his new friend at Target? Well, I mean, here's the thing. He asked me out,

so I feel like he knew it was a date. Yeah, but did he ask you out to go somewhere, and then you just texted him and were like, I'm about to go to Target in an hour. Do you want to join me? Yes. Okay, because if I were him, I'd be like, oh, she doesn't really want to date me.

She just sort of wants to be friends or something. But then he'd still say yes to the movie at the end, right? I don't know. Not necessarily, because I might think, hey, this is my buddy, and now she wants to go go see a movie and we're going to sit there and share popcorn. Maybe not even share popcorn. So you think that he thinks that I just want to be friends? That's what I'm saying a possibility is.

That could be one of the reasons why he's not calling you back. Well, I made it clear on my text messages that I'd like to go out with him again, so I don't really know how that would be the case. Okay, and he says nothing back to you at all? Nothing. How many times have you tried to get a hold of him? text messages that I'd like to go out with him again, so I don't really know how that would be the case. Okay, and he says nothing back to you at all? Nothing. How many times have you tried to get a hold of him? I mean, I don't want to, you know, stalk him and scare him off, but, I mean, a few times.

Okay. Well, we'll play a song, come back, call him, and get your second date update, all right? Okay. Thank you. Hang on. Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jub you. Hang on. 11-92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update.

We are actually learning something from today's second date update, and that's that dating has changed. No longer is it dinner. You should take your first date to a department store. Okay. That's right. You just walk around a place like Target and you take them over to the home furnishing sections and go, ooh, look, some Martha Stewart collection towels. What do you think about those? And then you see if they have similar interests.

That's what Lucia did on her first date, and apparently that's what she's been doing for a lot of her first dates. When a guy wants to go out with her, she'll hit him up and be like, hey, I'm going to Target. You want to come with me? And if they seem like they have a lot in common and they like the same things at Target, then she'll be like, let's go to the movies

or something after and continue the date. If not, then she just splits and goes like, yeah, that guy's a jerk. And her most recent Target date is a guy named Terrence that she met at a work function. They went and hung out at Target. She really liked him. She invited him to the movies after. He said, oh, I gotta go. And he hasn't talked to her ever since. All right, Lucia, are you ready to call him and see why he's not getting back to you?

I'm ready. Lucia, can I ask you, what's your success rate with the Target test? Well, that's how I met my last boyfriend. Okay. Apparently it works for you. All right, well, I'm about to dial Terrence's phone number see if we get him on the phone and find out why he's not calling you back okay okay hello I gotta speak to Terrence please please? This is Terrence. Hey, Terrence, how are you?

This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning. Sorry, from what? Brook and Jubal in the Morning. It's a radio show. Okay. Okay, how you doing? I don't understand. Why are you calling me?

I'm calling you because you recently went out on a date with one of our listeners, and they're wondering why you're not calling them back so you're doing a show about it yeah it's a segment we do on our show called the second date update you recently went on a date with a girl named lucia okay well lucia emailed us and told us about your little target experience and she says that she's asked you out a few times after that, and you just aren't responding to her. So she's wondering if you didn't want to see her again and if she did something wrong on your date.

Well, I mean, if you call a date like walking around Target and, like, shopping, you know, just, like, getting stuff. By the way, I want to point out, I told her how weird it sounds to take somebody on a date to Target. Yeah, but if you don't like a person, why are you going to agree to go hang out with them at Target? Like, you liked her at the beginning of this. Well, I mean, yeah, and she's, like, cool, and she's really cute, you know, which is, like, I mean, I'm, like, a really simple dude.

You know, I'm down to hang out at Target. I just didn't really know what the deal was, you know? We're, like, walking around. She's shopping. She's got a towel set and toothpaste and toilet paper. She's shopping. I got some Twizzlers because I love Twizzlers. And they have them there, which is great. They have everything. We're in the checkout line, right?

And I'm, like, behind her, and she's running all her stuff, and it comes out to, like, $96. The checkout person, like, tells her the total, and she turns and looks at me, and she says, are you going to get this? What? She had you buy her stuff at Target? I didn't know what to do.

What did you do? I paid for it. You paid for her stuff at Target? I mean, I was like, what? I didn't know if we were on a date. I thought maybe she was going to give me cash. You know, like she didn't have any. Or like, I'll write you a check or I'll pay you.

Okay, so when she turned to you and said, are you going to pay for this? What was your first reaction to her? Because I would have laughed and been like, no. I just, like, we're in line, you know, there are people behind us. So I kind of just panicked and I gave the checkout lady my card. And she didn't offer to reimburse you at any point? Like, I forgot my credit card, I'll pay you back later type of situation? I don't even know if she said thank you.

Really? That is the most insane thing I've ever heard. Is it like paying for dinner, though? No. You feel like she used you to buy her groceries or something? I don't feel like she used me. She totally used me. Honestly, like, if that's how she is,

it was a pretty cheap lesson. You know what I mean? I'm glad that I learned it at the start. She says she really likes you. That's the thing. Would you like me if I bought you your groceries? Yeah, I guess you're right. I would.

I would really appreciate that. Maybe you and I should hang out sometimes since you like doing that for people, Terrence. So I also need to let you know that Lucia is actually on the other line listening to this conversation, too. No way. Yep. Yes, I am.

Hey. I'm so confused what's going on right now. I don't understand anything. What? What are you confused about? You made me buy your groceries. Well, I thought we were on a date and you were a gentleman. And everybody knows on a first date, the gentleman pays.

No. Are you kidding? Lucia. They pay. Lucia, they don't normally pay for your groceries at Target. Yes, they do. That's how I found my last boyfriend. And other guys don't seem to have a problem.

It just sounds like you're using men to just pay for your lifestyle. No, it was a first date. He should have paid, you know? He would have paid the same amount for dinner. We just got towels and stuff. But that's the thing, on a date, like, you both do something together,

like you have dinner, and you both have dinner. And we did. And this is different because I'm just buying your s**t. No. Didn't we spend time together? Like, that was part of the date. We had fun together. We spent time.

That's what you do. And I shared stories with you. See, sharing. I shared. And the guy pays on the first date. Are you joking with this right now? Look, I have taken plenty of guys to Target, and they don't seem to have an issue. Well, they don't have an issue because you probably never hear from them again.

No, they're just different. You're cheap, and they're not. Are you guys hearing this? I mean, this is what I'm up against. Am I crazy here or what? No. No, I don't think... She's a nut job. I'm... This is what happens. This is what

has worked for me in the past and I thought, I genuinely thought he was a nice guy. Clearly, I was wrong. Yeah, not only that, but you're the one that asked him out, so even if you guys were going to dinner, you should have been the one paying. I mean, that's kind of the general rule, right? Well, no, technically, he asked me out on the first date.

Okay. Right? And then you made him up. I just happened to be going to Target. And you made that date Target, and you thought he should have been a gentleman and paid for your first date at Target. So I'm completely innocent in all this. I mean, it was a first date. He should have paid, right?

Yep, Lucia, you were exactly right. And I'm sorry that he's overreacting about that. Thank you. You're welcome. And I'm sorry. Stop it. She's going to take you seriously. She should take me seriously.

Lucia. You are overreacting. Yes, he is, right, Lucia? But would you like to go out with him again, though? We'll pay for a second date wherever you want to go, Walmart even. Before, I would have said yes, but not now. Really? No, I'm not interested in going out with someone who doesn't know proper etiquette for a first date.

And I think you're completely justified, Lucia. Thank you. You're welcome. Well, I don't want to go out with him, but you guys, I mean, for participating, I wouldn't mind the gift cards. Gift cards? You want the dinner even though you're not getting a second date? Well, this has been very stressful. It has been. Lucia.

No, Lucia, you're right. This has been stressful for you. Don't do it, dude. And he was kind of a jerk about the whole thing. I'm sorry, Terrence, but you were. He was. So, you know what? I'm going to put you on hold and then I'm going to get you a bunch of gift cards, okay? Yeah. You're welcome. Hang on the phone, okay?

Okay. Love you guys. You too. Dude, you are not making things better. That girl is nuts. I just want to do more second date updates with her. I know we're going to get more. Broken Jubal in the morning. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show,

and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into john's unique take on the biggest topics in politics entertainment sports and more joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors and with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove.

Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You've got to check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

$1.4 billion in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm AJ Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First. Introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.