Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - 2nd Date Update PODCAST: To Grandmother's House We Go

Episode Date: March 6, 2019

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Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble. More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada, to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025.

I'll be joined by David Roth of Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. With guest appearances from Behind the Bastards Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your in from time to time for second date updates with people that know that they've made a mistake and they just want our help in fixing the situation because apparently they can't do it themselves. And one of those people is Sean, who's on the phone for a second date update today. And Sean, I guess, knows that he screwed up his first date and now he wants to be fixed. So Sean, how can I fix you right now?

You can fix me by helping me not be so stupid. Yeah, that's tough. It's a big ask. I'm kind of stupid as well so I don't know if I can do that, Sean. So instead, why don't you tell us a little bit about the girl you want to call today for a second date update and we'll see if there's another way to fix you.

What's her name? Her name is Teresa. Teresa, all right. And where did you meet Teresa? We met just, like, randomly at a bar. We were out with our, like, own friends, and we were sitting near each other. We started talking, really hit it off. I got her number.

I asked her out. She seemed genuinely excited to go on a date with this person she just met. So she, I mean, you had a lot of hope for your guys' first date. Or maybe high expectations. As high as you can. Right. When you're going on a first date. But like, I was pretty excited. Right. And you say

that you know you screwed everything up. Yeah. I want to hear about that in a second. But how was the date overall? It was okay. So I picked her up and she said she was about that in a second but how was the date overall it was okay so uh i picked her up and uh she said she was really in the mood for chinese food and there was a restaurant near her place and i said yeah that's awesome we were both really hungry so we order a bunch of food and i swear it was like not even five minutes and they started bringing out the food so we barely even had a chance to like have a real conversation because you know out the food. So we barely even had a chance to, like, have a real conversation.

Because, you know, once the food comes, like, half of your conversation is about the food. And before we knew it, we were done with dinner. So it was just quick. Yeah, and I just expected it to go longer than that. And so I didn't really have, like, a backup plan. Yeah. So, you know, I asked her if she needed to go home right away, if she wanted to keep hanging out. And I said, this might sound weird, but my grandparents live real nearby.

They've been bugging me to come visit them. What? It was still early. I said, would it be weird if you came with me to, like, hang out with my grandparents? And she was actually, like, so cool with it. She said she loves hanging out with old people. But this is the part where it gets, like, not good and where I screwed up. Okay. Yeah.

So we're walking up to my grandparents' front door and like, I'm about to ring the doorbell and I'm like, Hey, just like heads up. They might think that you're my serious girlfriend. So just like, don't be mad. Just like help me out.

And then before I could even explain my grandma opened the door. So did you tell them that she was your girlfriend or you told them that you had a girlfriend and then you shut up? Oh, yeah. No, it's like a month before this. They had just been on my case about being single and, you know, they want grandkids. And I said, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm dating somebody.

She's really awesome. Oh, okay. Wait, hold up, Sean. Was this whole thing planned just so that you could prove? No, no, no, no. Honestly, it really wasn't. As it was happening, I was like, oh, this will kill two birds will like kill two birds one stone you know okay yeah that's a bad idea so you asked her basically to pretend to be your girlfriend for your grandparents yeah i mean

hindsight but you know i thought if i could explain to her she'd totally get it because she seemed cool yeah but you didn't even give her a chance to say no i don't want to participate because you were literally on the doorstep waiting for the door to open when you dropped that bombshell on her. No, that's totally true. So I forgot that I told them that I had the girlfriend until we were like, they're ringing the doorbell. And so I just kind of blurted it out because I didn't want her to be surprised by these two old people. So that's where your stupid comes in, I feel like. Yeah, exactly.

So after all that, how was the end of the date? That sucks. That's where your stupid comes in, I feel like. Yeah, exactly. Quick, get my girlfriend! After all that, how was the end of the date? Honestly, I thought it was going really well. What did she do when your grandparents assumed that it was her girlfriend? How did she act? She totally went with it. I thought she was totally on my side. My grandparents, of course, they're talking me me up, you know, because other grandparents do. For like over an hour, we just had like a really nice time.

She actually seemed to really enjoy hanging out with my grandparents. And like I said, she didn't blow my cover, so I assumed that I was golden. So that's why you thought it was going well. Yeah. Okay. All right. So how did it end with her? So bad.

Oh, really? Oh, so bad. Yeah. So bad. What, really? Oh, so bad. Yeah, so bad. What happened that was so bad? The door closed behind us, and I went to hold her hand, and she said, Don't touch me. Don't talk to me. Just take me home.

Whoa. Okay, so you really read that situation wrong, that she was enjoying herself at your grandparents'. Yeah, she was definitely acting the part, so I thought that she was actually having a good time and into it, yeah she was definitely acting the part so i uh thought that she was like actually having a good time and into it but she was not she was just being nice in the moment and then yeah afterwards it was obvious that she was pissed have you talked to her since then no i tried to talk to her on the ride back to her place i you know i tried to explain to her

like why i did what i did. She refused to talk to me, got out of the car, slammed the door. And I mean, that was like a month ago and she won't return my calls. I've been texting her, apologizing, like everything that I can do to get her to just talk to me again. Like I said, it's like, I realized I was stupid, but I was not trying to be like deceitful. Okay. So you basically, you need our help to give you an opportunity to, to really explain yourself and apologize. Absolutely. Okay.

All right. We'll do that. We'll play a song and then come back and call her and get your second date update. Okay. Okay. All right. Hang on. Moving 92.5.

Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Second date update. Right in the middle of today's second date update. And if you're just joining us, I think we might have found somebody who's a worse grandson than I am. My grandpa died a few weeks ago, and I didn't even know. So that shows how bad of a grandson

I am, but Sean is giving me a run for my money. If you're just joining us, Sean went out with a girl named Teresa, and he said they had a great time and everything else, but dinner went really fast, so he decided to stop by his grandparents' house because it was in the neighborhood. And then, while he was at the door, he remembered that he had told his grandparents a lie and said that he had a serious girlfriend and then asked Teresa to play the role of his girlfriend. Which she did, but as soon as the date was over, she was obviously very upset about that and hasn't talked to him since. You know, Sean, you say that you just remembered about that big lie you told your grandparents

while you were standing on the doorstep, but I even have a hard time believing you. It does feel like it was a whole setup, the entire date, just so that you could fulfill this thing with your grandparents. No, I mean, I agree. It totally seems like that, but I'm not trying to make it sound like I'm a pathological liar. But, like, sometimes you have to tell your parents or your grandparents things. And it's hard to keep track because you don't want them to worry about you, you know? Yeah, or just tell them the truth.

Or just tell them the truth. And if they don't like who you are, be like, screw you. I'm not talking to you. That's kind of what I did. So anyway. I can't do that to my grandparents. Okay. So you'll lie and pretend that you're somebody else.

Got it. Well, it's not working out in your favor, but I'm going to dial her phone number right now and see if we can help you out, okay? Thank you, guys. I really appreciate it. All right, here we go. Hello?

Hi, can I speak to Teresa, please? It's Teresa. Teresa, how are you? This is Jubal from Brooke and Jubal in the Morning. Who? Jubal from Brooke and Jubal in the Morning. It's a radio show. I'm guessing by the who you haven't listened to it.

No, I'm not familiar with it. I'm sorry, why are you calling me? I'm calling you because we do a segment on our show. It's called The Second Date Update. And what that is is where if you go out on a date with somebody and then end up not calling them back after, they can email us to get you on the phone and ask what happened. So you went out on a date with a dude named Sean recently who listens to our show. Oh, God.

He emailed you? Yes, Sean emailed and told us all about your date, even the fact that he asked you to pretend to be his girlfriend for his grandparents. Oh, he told you that? Yes, he did. He admitted it, and he admits that that was a big failure, and he knows that that's why you're not talking to him. And he was hoping that he could maybe explain himself a little bit more. I don't know that I want to talk to him. I mean, he's a pretty dishonest guy, obviously, if you know the story, so I don't really know

what there is to talk about. It was an accident, though. Well, it wasn't an accident. An accident? Yeah. What did he say? I mean, he said that you went along with the story and pretended

to be his girlfriend while you were at the grandparents, and then as soon as you left, you, like, went just cold on him. Yeah, that's pretty accurate. I mean, I don't know what else someone would expect if they're going to do something like that. I mean, why did you go along with it? If you I was under the impression when we left the restaurant that we were just going to like pop in and say hi to them like really quick.

And he dropped this bombshell on me about this lie that he's told him. And like the minute we're at the door, it's a super awkward situation. What am I supposed to do? Yeah. Like, are you going to blow him up right there in front of his grandparents? And now it's even more awkward than just suffering through it? By nature, I'm a really honest person. So, I mean, it was one of the worst things about it to me was just the ease with which he lied to these people who love him. And not only that he could do it, that he wanted someone he just met to participate

in that lie with no account for my feelings. Yeah. Yeah, that's a pretty heavy observation that you just made right there. So, I mean, I just didn't have a good sense about him as a person at all. Like, as soon as that happened, I was like, that's terrible. He admits that he screwed up, and he knows that that's why you don't want to talk to him again, but he was hoping that, you know, we could get you on the phone and maybe explain things a little better. I don't know that that's necessary.

I mean, it was a really frustrating date, and it was really disappointing, but I got to tell you, actually, in the end, it was one of the best things that's happened to me in a long time. I'm actually not sorry that it happened because a really good thing has come out of it. You decided to just stop dating in general because everybody lies yeah so you've given up dating i know actually what happened is like after it went down i felt guilty about it for days and i knew when i was sitting there with these two just lovely people that he's introducing me to that i'm not being myself i'm looking them in the eye and lying to them and making something up. And it weighed on me.

It weighed on my conscience. So I went back to his grandparents' house a few days later, and I told them. What? Of course. Aw. You told them that you were pretending to be his girlfriend? I did. It came totally clean.

And I was like, listen, if you're upset with me, I completely understand. But it bothered me to know that these two people with such generous hearts who, like, welcomed me in, that I was basically— How do you know that they have such generous hearts and everything else? I mean, their grandson is a liar. And, you know, tends to run in the family. So maybe they're just as big of a liar, you know? Age doesn't have anything to do with the truth.

No, no, no, no. You know what? I don't know why that particular apple fell so far from the tree. I have to tell you, they were so kind and understanding. They let me hang out. We chatted for hours. They've got this beautiful love story. They met in Europe when they were like 15 and escaped the war.

I mean, these are people who have like, they get what's important in life. They get love and trust. You know more about his grandparents than he knows about his grandparents. I actually, you know, I don't have grandparents of my own. So I've kind of adopted them. You know, I mean, that's something I've always wanted in my life. And so I've been visiting him, like, every three

or four days. No way! You're hanging out with his grandparents? That's so cute! That's weird, though. You guys, if you met them, you would completely understand why. And I told them I wasn't with him, and they were guys, if you met them, you would completely understand why. And I told them I wasn't with him, and they were like, don't worry. He doesn't visit us that much anyway. This is even better.

You know who would be very interested to hear that, Teresa? Who? Well, Sean, of course. Yeah. Don't you think? Good luck. I mean, I'm not talking to him, so it doesn't matter. You kind of just told him, though, because he is actually on the other line listening and wants to talk to you. I bet he wants his grandkids back.

What? Sean, you still there? Yes, I'm here. Are you kidding me? No, I'm not kidding you. They've told me, like, how little they've seen and heard from you, and you lie to them. You're a crappy grandson. I don't know what else to tell you.

Teresa, that's not true, not including Christmas. I've seen them at least like two or three times this year. Wow. That doesn't include Christmas. I've seen them four times this week, you tool. Oh, dang. I'm more of a granddaughter to them than you are a grandson. Like, I mean, you lied to them. They said to me, they're like, yeah, we don't trust him.

He's lied to us about things before, like your grades and stuff when you were in college, and then they found out later about things they're on to you. You need to stop talking. I need to get a word in here, please. So you can tell me more lies? You want me to be quiet so you can lie? Oh, my God. Like, shut up for a second.

Because first of all, I can't believe you're seeing my grandparents behind my back. That is messed up. Like, what? Sean, have you not talked to your grandparents since you guys went on that date? No, I haven't, but I don't think that that matters. I will talk to them now. Oh, my God. It's been a month.

You don't tell me when I talk to my grandparents or I visit them. I am a grown man. I'll do it when I want to do it. You guys are crazy. Your grandparents want you to grow up and settle down. Like they said to me, they hope, I mean, you're not going to settle down with me. They think I'm too good for you, okay? So that's not going to happen.

But they want you to meet someone nice. But they're like, you know, he does need to meet someone at his maturity level. My maturity level. Okay, I'll get right on that. Sean, I mean, it sounds like they had already found out that you lied to them in the past. It doesn't sound like that was really news to them. I feel like you thought you were getting away with stuff that you weren't. Are you guys on her side now, too?

Everyone tells their grandparents little white lies. It makes them happy. I don't want them to worry about me. You're not making them happy. You're disappointing them all the time. That is not true. You know what? I forbid you from seeing them. I forbid it. You're not allowed all the time. That is not true. You know what? I forbid you from seeing them.

I forbid it. You can't forbid me to see them. They're my friends, and you can't tell me who to be friends with, and you can't tell them who to be friends with, okay? That is up to Mort and Nancy, who they want to hang out with. Mort and Nancy. Oh, sweet, Mort and Nancy. Don't you dare call Nana and Pop-Pop by their first names.

You are not their friend. You know what? You better watch that will, okay? Because let's see who's going to inherit it. Man, Sean, it sounds like you made a big mistake trying to get Teresa to play this game. She's taking over your family, actually.

Have you, like, brainwashed them? Are you, like, just taking advantage of two poor little old people who escaped the war? I mean, I swear. Like, it sounds to me like you're just taking advantage of two old people for your own personal fulfillment. Oh. Yeah, well, you know, it's pretty emotionally fulfilling to them.

They like being visited, okay? They like, like, when people come and treat them like they're family and that they matter and they're not just like people who should be put out to pasture because they're old and you're not interested. Wow. Sean, I don't know if you want to pasture because they're old and you're not interested. Wow. Sean, I don't know if you want to argue with her anymore. Yeah, she's winning. Teresa, would you like to go out with Sean again on a second date?

We'll pay for it. I mean, I don't even know if Sean wants to go out at this point, but I don't know of a way to wrap it up. Teresa, would you like to go out with Sean? I would love it if you would pay Sean to take his grandparents out for a nice dinner somewhere. That's a really nice thought. I would love that. Because that pay Sean to take his grandparents out for a nice dinner somewhere. That's a really nice thought. I would love that.

Because that would mean a lot to them. Hey, Sean. Oh, Sean. What? What do you want? I like Teresa's idea, but instead I'm going to pay for Teresa to go out with your grandparents because I think she's more important to them at this point. Sean.

Are you kidding me? No, I'm not. Congratulations, Teresa. I would be delighted and Morton Nancy would be delighted. Stop using their first name. Brooke and Jubal in the morning. Ugh, we're so done with New Year, New You. This year, it's more you on Bumble.

More of you shamelessly sending playlists, especially that one filled with show tunes. More of you finding Gemini's because you know you always like them. More of you dating with intention because you know what you want. And you know what? We love that for you. Someone else will, too. Be more you this year and find them on Bumble. Joel, the holidays are a blast,

but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast.

Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast.

And this January, we're going to go on the road to beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada to cover the Consumer Electronics Show, tech's biggest conference. Better Offline CES coverage won't be the usual rundown of the hottest gadgets or biggest trends, but an unvarnished look at what the tech industry plans to sell or do to you in 2025. I'll be joined by David Roth at Defector and the writer Edward Ongueso Jr. with guest appearances from Behind the Bastards Robert Evans, It Could Happen Here's Gare Davis, and a few surprise guests throughout the show. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

else you get your podcasts from.