Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - 2nd Date Update PODCAST: Weirdo With Six Drinks

Episode Date: September 12, 2018

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John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

1.4 billion dollars in NFL quarterback contracts. The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm A.J. Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First, introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast,

the quarterback series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

You are cordially invited to the hottest party in professional sports. I'm Tisha Allen, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf. Featuring interviews with top players on tour, tips to help improve your swing, and the craziest stories to come out of your friendly neighborhood country club. Welcome to the Party with Tisha Allen is an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Welcome to the Party, that's P-A-R-T-E-E,

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Need LASIK? Trust the experienced team at the LASIK Center at Evergreen Eye Center. No glasses, no contacts, no limits. What will you do? LASIK at Evergreen.com. Moving 92.5. Rook and Jubal's Second Date Update.

The guy on the phone for a second date update today in his email said that he uses Tinder all the time. He loves it. Okay. And he's had a lot of good and bad dates, but this is the first time he's emailed us because he thinks he might be ready to jump off Tinder because he found the one. Oh, really? But now she's not calling him back. His name is Keith. What's up, Keith? Hey, guys.

How's it going? Can I take a guess that you met this woman on said Tinder? I did meet her on Tinder. Okay, cool. And what's her name? Her name is Heather. Okay, so tell us a little bit about Heather. So I met Heather on Tinder, and I had a good feeling about it i swiped and she

it was a match and uh it's good because you wouldn't have been able to meet her if you didn't i'm sorry guys i'm just really nervous talking to you guys i'm a big fan of you just pretend like you're messaging with us on tinder a lot more confidence there well that's really funny i like your jokes well Well, thank you. I appreciate it. All right. You said you were kind of a Tinder expert. Was there something that made her different from all the other people that you see on Tinder? Well, she had a really good picture.

It was funny. It wasn't just of her. You know, it had her dog in it. It wasn't just a normal, you know, shot. It's the best picture she's ever taken. So I thought that was good. Okay. Dogs always make Tinder better, I swear.

So tell us about your date with Heather. What did you guys do? So we decided to meet up at a bar. And I got there first. And then she got there. She said that she had trouble recognizing me, which I get a lot. Because I don't really use my picture. It's some guy that she had trouble recognizing me, which I get a lot, uh, cause I don't really use my picture.

It's some guy that looks, you know, kind of like me. Why are you on Tinder not using your picture? What are you doing, man? Catfishing. Well, I mean, he looks just like me. So why not use yours? I tried using my picture and I never got anything. And as soon as I used the other picture,

I was getting matches all day long. Is that because he is maybe, I mean, granted, we all are working with what we got. Is this guy, though, the picture you're using, is he a lot more handsome than you? Is he like the good-looking version of you? I mean, I wouldn't say a lot. A better chin, maybe, but that's about it.

Okay. How could you ever get a follow-up date if someone shows up to the date and you're not who you say you are? Well, I just tell them it was from like a different time in my college days. Oh. All right. So, yeah, that was me before I got a job and gained a few pounds or whatever. All right. So is that what you told Heather? I just, you know, I mentioned that it was from another time and she kind of, you know, shrugged it off and we kept going.

I thought we were having a good time. Okay. What made you think you were having such a good time? We found common interests. We like talking about celebrities and Hollywood gossip and, you know, all this stuff that's happening. All right. So did you guys just gossip for a few hours and that was the whole date? I wish. Oh, okay. I mean, I'm not really sure what happened. It was somewhere around the middle of the date she started feeling uncomfortable

and just the conversation wasn't flowing the way it was in the beginning. Okay. And, you know, I'm just not sure. Did you ever recover from that or was it awkward after that? It kind of got a little more awkward. I thought get some more drinks, kind of loosen up a a little bit so i ordered a bunch of drinks for the table maybe too many i got three and she got three drinks for each of you yeah i thought you know we'd make it fun and try and get a little loosened up what did she say yeah did she pound the drinks

so she actually didn't drink any of the drinks. And I'm sitting there, I'm like, I ordered all these drinks for us, and I'm not going to be able to drink them. And, yeah, she kind of just said that her friend texted her. I'm not really sure. Yeah. Okay. I'll tell you, if I was in her situation,

I would feel like you were trying to get me hammered so that, like, I would sleep with you. Oh, well, I mean necessarily not necessarily whatever happens happens but it that's not you know it's not my intention all right so did she just leave and cut the date short yes she said oh i got a text from my friend she needs my help and i'm gonna get out of here but i never really saw her look at her phone or anything. Okay. She didn't even pick up her phone at all. Just, I got a text.

I know I can fill it in my pocket. It's from my friend. I have to go. Yeah. How many times have you tried to get a hold of her since that date? Like four or five, but it's only been a few days. Oh my gosh. I mean, she obviously doesn't want anything to do with you.

You think so? Yes. You think it's obvious? I mean, you catfished her, then you tried to get her drunk, and then she lied about having an emergency nobody has an emergency from a friend it just doesn't work that way but we talked a lot about celebrities what oh well there you go so to me the date went well well we'll play a song and then come back and call her get your second date update okay can i just say one more thing to you guys?

Sure. I got to say, it's an honor and a privilege to be on the air and doing this with you guys. I listen to you all the time. I'm a huge fan, and I love it. I love it. All right. Now I hope you get a date. We'll do it right after this. Hang on.

Moving 92.5. Brooke and Jubal in the Mornings. Second date update. You know, I really don't understand why Keith isn't getting a call back from his date. Let's recap real quick. Really? He met her on Tinder. He actually catfished her by having a picture of some other dude as his profile. Then they met up and they hung out and there was a lull in the conversation.

So he ordered six drinks for the table all at the same time. Three for her, three for him in an attempt to get her hammered. So it would lube up the conversation a little bit. And then she said she had to leave because she got a text message from her friend. There was an emergency, although she never looked at her phone. So I don't get it. Sounds like a pretty successful date to me. Keith, are you ready to call Heather?

Yeah, yeah. I really like her. So I hope it's not the profile picture because i'm a good guy i mean it doesn't it shouldn't matter what i look like it sounds like it's all those things combined but one thing that i didn't ask you that i'm really curious about what did you do with the six drinks that you had ordered and nobody drank did you finish them yourself i did okay she left i didn't know what else to do. Somebody had a good night. It just wasn't her. I didn't

drink them all at once, but I did drink them all. I sat there for a while and talked to the people around me and the tables around me. Yeah, so there's one guy with just six drinks at his table, at least talking to people. All right. Well, I'm going to call her right now.

Here we go. Hey, Jubal. When she answers, can you tell her I'm a good guy? I'm really funny, just like you? Sure. Just like you. I'll tell her. He's pretty much like you.

Yeah, pretty much. I mean, you might as well start using Jubal's picture for your profile. Go for it, dude. I don't care. All right. Here we go. Hello? here we go hello hi can I speak to Heather please this is Heather who can I who's calling hey Heather how are you? I'm great. What is this about? Well. Did I win something? No, you didn't. Well, that sucks. We actually do a segment on our show. It's called the Second

Date Update. It's where if you go out on a date with somebody and then end up blowing them off, they can email us to get you on the phone and ask what happened. So somebody emailed us about you. Okay. Who emailed about me? It's a guy you met off of Tinder. His name is Keith. Oh. We had a feeling you'd have that reaction. So Keith told us actually a little bit about your date, and he's wondering why he's not getting a call back. Is he really

asking that question? I mean, was he not on the same date that I was on? Yeah. He seemed to think that you guys had a great time and really connected over talking about celebrities. He's clearly delusional or has memory loss. Really? I mean, he told us about the date and it sounded fabulous. I mean, fabulous or from his point of view, but creepiest from my point of view. I don't really, it wasn't the six drinks that he ordered. I mean, if somebody ordered six drinks trying to get me drunk, I would, I would say thanks, but then I would also think they were creepy. No, I mean, the drink part, I mean, was weird, but, like, that wasn't even the worst part of the date.

Yeah. I know you guys, like, said, like, we talked about celebrities, and we did, but I cannot imagine he told you the full story of that conversation, because you guys are still like i feel like you're still on keith's side all he told us is that you guys bonded over the fact that you're both really into celebrity gossip that was the extent of that it sounded innocent from the way he described it it's not innocent uh so yeah we're like into celebrity i mean i'm into celebrity

gossip like i like i mean i read all those magazines, and I love the E! News Network. But when we were speaking about it, he proceeded to pull out his cell phone and started showing me nude pictures of celebrities that he had downloaded. Like male and female. Oh, what? Nudes? Like male and female. Yeah.

Just any nude celebrity. Yeah. I mean, he's like, yeah, I just search for them. And. Yeah. Just any nude celebrity. Yeah. I mean, he's like, yeah, I just search for them. And then when I find them, I download them. He's like, I have this very extensive. I mean, he had like just a folder in his photos of just all naked celebs. Like there had to be at least 100 photos in there. Why would he show you that?

Is it like his like spank bank type thing? Or like what's happening here? I don't know. I did not ask because I was just so weirded out. I didn't want to know the extent of what he does with these photos. I mean, if he's showing them to me, God knows what he's doing with them when he's by himself. Right. And then if that's what he publicly shares, what does he have in private?

Yeah. Yeah. Like, if he's very open about that, like what don't I know? You didn't like any of them? I wasn't really looking at them. Like he just, he popped one up and I was like so flabbergasted that he's showing me a new celebrity photo. And then he like, he's like, what? I have so many.

He was like, he showed me the folder. He was like scrolling through. I'm like what is happening right now like am i being punked like is somebody filming this like this can't be happening like this this is not something you talk about on a first date what did you say i'm not prude but at the same time like i just don't think this is very appropriate to be showing nudes like we're out in public and you know it was you know it's close quarters too so i'm sure somebody at a table around us like also saw that he had new photos on his phone you know like he's showing me i'm like i'm telling you i don't want to do this and i'm trying not to be rude almost

trying to like change the conversation i gotta say something heather heather uh hey heather uh that's keith he's actually on the other line listening And wants to talk to you And apparently can't wait What is going on Like he's listening He's on the phone Yeah yeah Heather

I just wanted to talk to you And you wouldn't call me back Because I mean were you not on the same date like i was so uncomfortable like yeah but i didn't hug goodbye why were you uncomfortable we were having a good time what did you not hear anything she said you're like a sicko dude like why are you carrying around folders with naked celebrities on them what else am I supposed to do with those photos? What?

I don't know. I mean, you could not search for them on the internet and download them. That's one thing you could do or not do. I mean, you guys have talked to celebrities all the time. You never wondered what one of them looked like naked. I bet you I can find a picture of them. No. They are not celebrity.

That's a different conversation for a different time, Keith. We're talking about Heather right now and her being creeped out by you. Okay, Heather, you pick a celebrity and I bet you'll find a

No, not that. Why would I pick a celebrity? Are you listening to yourself? Can you hear yourself speaking? Yeah.

This is not normal. This is not a normal conversation you have with someone you're on a first date with. Well, I mean, after you left, I talked to the tables around us, and they liked the celebrity pictures. Wait, this is a normal thing that you're sharing with people? This is just out in the open for you in your life?

Yeah, everybody wants to see celebrities naked. I mean, a lot of people do. Their photos always blow up whenever they're leaked online, but it's just kind of weird to be out at a bar showing random strangers that you have a bunch of niggas left. It's such an invasion of privacy to those people who have their phones hacked. Like, that's awful. I have a couple pictures of myself

on there nude, and I don't care. Oh my gosh. Like, that's just the times we're in. That makes it better. Yeah, Heather, were you ever wondering what Keith looked like nude? No. No, I, were you ever wondering what Keith looked like nude? No, no. I don't know.

I saw your face when I was walking to you. You mean the face? I felt like you were done dressing me with your eyes. Oh, man. No, that didn't even cross my mind, you weirdo, creepy man. Then why are you looking at me like that? Like what? Like I was creeped out by the fact that this man approaching me looked nothing like his photo on his Tinder profile?

What do you mean? That was me. Oh! Okay, are you sure? Because that photo looked more like Ryan Reynolds, and you look more like Schmeagle from The Hobbit. Oh. Nah.

Nah. I get that I look like Ryan Reynolds all the time. Really? Shut up. Are you really using a Ryan Reynolds picture as your profile? No, it's not Ryan Reynolds. It looks just like me. But is it really Ryan Reynolds, Keith?

Like, you guys are funny. We should all hang out. No. We'll get a bunch of drinks and look at pictures of some naked celebrities. Don't do it, guys. Well, first, Heather. I have all of them. Oh, great.

First, Heather, I need to ask you, though. Will you go on a second date with Keith? We will pay for it. Oh, my gosh. For all the money in the world, I would not go on another date with Keith. Dude, Heather, I just want to apologize. If we had known what was going on, we wouldn't have even gotten you on the phone.

For real, Heather? You're going to say no after I buy you all those drinks? Yes, I am saying no. I did not ask for the drinks. You ordered them, so no. That's just being ungrateful. No, she owes you nothing, Keith. She owes you absolutely nothing.

Why don't you be grateful, Heather, and give Keith another shot? What are you guys saying? Stop it. Brooke, come on. What are you doing? I thought you were on my side. No. No, I haven't been on your side from actually the very beginning when we found out about

the profile picture. You're creepy, dude. Whatever, guys. I got a great personality. I think we should all hang out and, you know, not worry about any of this stuff. Yeah, well, you know what? Then you probably don't feel too bad about not getting another date with Heather. That's cool. I thought Heather was fun, but it seems like she's not too fun.

So it's fine. Well, Keith will find you somebody who wants to sit around and look at naked celebrities with you. Text in to 78592. Is there anybody out there at all interested in Keith? Yeah, come on, guys. Text in. And if you want to send me some nudes, that's cool. You guys are celebrities. I'll put you in my folder.

Done. Done and done, Keith. There's no way. Broken Jubal in the morning. Move at 92.5. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. $1.4 billion in NFL quarterback contracts.

The untold stories behind the biggest deals in football history. I'm AJ Stevens, Vice President of Client Strategy at Athletes First, introducing the Athletes First Family Podcast, the Quarterback Series. My co-host Brian Murphy, Athletes First CEO, and I are sitting down with the agents who have negotiated contracts for Justin Herbert, Deshaun Watson, Dak Prescott, Tua Tugnavailoa, and Jordan Love. Listen to Athletes First Family Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You are cordially invited to the hottest party in professional sports.

I'm Tisha Allen, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf. Featuring interviews with top players on tour, tips to help improve your swing, and the craziest stories to come out of your friendly neighborhood country club. Welcome to the Party with Tisha Allen is an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Welcome to the Party, that's P-A-R-T-E-E, on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.