Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update - Second Date Update: Blackout Drunk Shuttlecock

Episode Date: October 27, 2021

One of our listeners was at a Halloween house party when he met his date, but she ghosted him the next day! He needs help finding out why she’s not calling him back...Because he doesn't remember most of the night...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Second Date Update You ever hooked up at a Halloween party before? Where you got a sexy nurse on top of a fireman You ever hooked up at a Halloween party before? Where you got a sexy nurse on top of a fireman, on top of the clown from it, on top of four David Hasselhoffs? Whoa, why is there four of them? Yeah, for real. That's a big hookup. I've seen it. I've done it.

Hashtag best Halloween ever. Oh, were you a Hasselhoffer? It's unknown. I thought he was a sexy nurse. By the end, I wasn't even sure what I was. All the makeup and everything. That's a good point. But one of our listeners also had a Halloween party hookup, and now he's calling for our help.

His name's Andrew. Andrew, welcome to the show, man. Hey, guys. Happy to be here. Okay, Andrew. Happy to be here. Well, did you have a good—it sounds like you had a great Halloween party. So, you know, it's a bit complicated.

There were good things, there were bad things. Oh, okay. So I met this really hot girl. Her name was Lexi at a Halloween party. Oh, no. Triggering. It's triggering for Jose. Every hot girl's name is Lexi and that's my ex-girlfriend's name.

It's just a hot name, you know? Yeah. It's a hot name. What was the scariest thing about the house party honestly it was the parking situation wait what i will say that can be a pain when you're at a house party you guys it's been 10 minutes i can't find a spot let's get out of here man residential streets it was like almost impossible to find a spot it took me literally forever but you know being the genius i, I was dressed as a shuttlecock.

You know, like the thing from Badminton? From Badminton? It's like a white, it's feathery. Call the birdie. It's like got a ball at one end and then feathers on the other end. Okay, wow. It was a huge white hula hoop on the bottom. And I wore like a red cap on my head.

That was one of the worst decisions of my life, just driving with that. You were driving with it on? You put it on once you get there, dog. But even then, maneuvering through doorways, like, the whole thing sounds awesome for a picture, and then beyond that, the functionality, very low. I can tell by your costume choice that

you weren't planning on trying to hook up with somebody no i did not think that was in the cards you know like i parked far away and just even walking there that wasn't easy but you know so i got there and you know like it's a dark house like there are lights and stuff but i but i can't really see and i'm tripping and you know there's some people on the street that I know who are also going there. At one point, I fell over and they tried to roll me. That actually sounds kind of funny. Man, that is a sexy entrance, sir.

Now that we know what you were dressed as in the parking situation, tell us a little bit about Lexi. How did you two end up meeting? I get there and there are people dancing around and stuff. And then it's almost like a friggin movie. Like through the thick of the fog, I see this beautiful girl. She's dressed as a shotgun wedding, which I thought was hilarious.

It was like a tight white dress. And she had a balloon underneath to make it look like she was preggers. Yeah. She was holding a Nerf gun. Oh, wow. Brooke is loving this idea. So how did you approach this uh fake pregnant woman so okay i was trying to think of like what my move would be and i saw there were like a bunch of candy wrappers just on the floor naturally so i tried to do it as like

this joke i'd smoothly walked over to her and i was like hey so you want some candy and i held out a bunch of empty wrappers did Did you do it with that weird voice? How did you get action between the costume and that? Honestly. I mean, you went through with that idea? Yeah, and also I definitely used the voice. The voice is the secret. That's how you get it. Yeah, because that shows you're not taking yourself seriously.

What was Lexi's response? We both started laughing and stuff, and then she was like, oh, so if you can find me a reese's peanut butter cup like i'll give you a reward so i was like bet you know this is my mission now yeah there's probably a candy bowl yeah but you know every candy bowl those are always eaten first i i was walking around just trying to find any reese's cups i could i i walk over to like some of the harley quins at the. There were like four of them. And so I asked them and no luck.

No luck. But then eventually some dude dressed as a zombie just handed me like a whole bunch. He had like pockets full of them. He was the Reese's zombie. So he helped me out there. That's kind of smart. I like that. Reese's zombie.

Okay. Okay. So what was your reward when you got her Reese's cup? So, okay. It should also be mentioned just for the sake of story i i was drinking a lot yeah oh here we go i mean it's a party so i go back and i give her the cups and she's really really stoked and she tells me her name it's lexi and you know we started to hang out we had a good time all. All right. The Reese's Peanut Butter Cups unlocked the door.

I would say yes, too. Better than flowers. Pay attention, gentlemen. So what happened? So we had kind of like a best case, worst case scenario happening here.

We started making out and, you know, we both wanted, you know, a little bit more to happen, but I'll be honest, we had some costume difficulties and it didn't go too perfectly.

Too many wires. It's amazing you could even reach her lips with the hula hoop contraption around you. We were also both just a tad bit hammered, and I can't remember too many of the details. Okay. So did the hookup end up happening, or no?

No, not really. Nothing beyond making out, but Iup end up happening or no no not really nothing beyond making out but you know i did end up getting her number from a friend of mine who also knew her but i've got nothing no response absolute ghost is that like the last thing you remember is that what you're saying bro like how did the night end for you so i definitely remember falling down a couple times oh no oh boy and uh I woke up in bed the next morning. Okay. So I'm just worried that you were maybe reading this wrong because she's not the one that gave you her number.

You know, I've made out with tons of different dudes at parties with zero intention of either hooking up or ever wanting to see them again. Well, we know it may have been Brooke that you were making out with this entire time. She has no idea. I don't do it anymore. I were making out with this entire time. She has no idea. I don't do it anymore. I only make out with one dude now. Well, who knows?

You don't remember anything, but I want to help you, Andrew, finish what you started that night, okay? We're going to play a song. We'll come back. Brooke's going to go out and grab some Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in the lobby

just in case we have to help the situation. I'm not lying. I got a secret drawer. Okay. Go to the secret drawer. We're going to come back and try and get you your second date update with Lexi. All right? Thanks, guys.

All right. Hold on. They say the key to a woman's heart is to make her laugh. But the key to a woman's kiss is to hand her a Reese's peanut butter cup. Oh, yeah. Is that me? Because one of our listeners, Andrew, met a woman named Lexi at a Halloween party recently. And she told him if he could find her a Reese's, she'd give him a little reward.

Oh. So he did. And they tried hooking up, but had some costume challenges. You know, plus there was alcohol involved. So it was kind of fuzzy for Andrew remembering how this all ended. We're going to do our best, though, to help get him another date. And, Brooke, I just got to say, you don't seem as invested as you normally do in these things. Like, did the shuttlecock outfit turn you off or what's going on?

I just think he may be misreading the whole vibe. What do you mean he misread? He hunted down a Reese's for her, Brooke. I know. What more do you want from this guy? That's your most prized possession, Brooke. I know. Usually if it's a one night stand, you're like, woo! Go get yours! You know, I'm all for one night stands

and fun, but like, I don't think she wanted it. I don't know. What do you mean she didn't want it? You think she just wanted candy? Yes! I do! I think she just wanted the candy and was like, ah, fine, I'll kiss him. Like, I'll make out with him a little bit, satisfy the dude. Like, she didn't even give him her number. Andrew, is that the vibe that you were getting?

That she just wanted candy from you? Honestly, no. We were really having a good time. Yes, we were a little tipsy. Yes, candy was involved. But she seemed to really like me and i genuinely liked her okay okay i believe you we'll find out yeah so she's not calling him okay maybe eat some more chocolate and get you in a better mood because we need to make this phone call now shake it off you ready

yeah i'm ready all right remember we're on andrew's side i know i'm not against him okay you're just not really all that for him and And I love his costume idea. Yes. You know I like overly complicated, like, ridiculous things to wear on Halloween. Oh, okay. So she almost gave you a compliment there, Andrew. You should feel good about that. I'll take it.

Okay, good. I'm going to dial Lexi's phone number. We're going to try to get your second date update. You ready? Oh, yeah. All right, man. Here we go. Hello? Hey, I'm looking for Lexi.

Yeah, who's this? Hey, my name's Jeff from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. How you doing? Wait, what? I'm from a morning radio show called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Oh, wow. Yeah. Hey, Lexi.

Oh, my God. Someone was impressed by morning radio. I know. Hey, I like her. Okay. We do a podcast, too. Okay. Stop. I don't know.

Boring. I'm kidding. But we're doing something right now called a second date update where we help our listeners reach out after usually a date. But I guess you didn't go out on a date with this guy. What's his name? His name's Andrew. Andrew. You may remember him as like shuttlecock guy.

Yeah. What? You met at a Halloween party and he was dressed as like a bad mitten birdie. Yes. Oh, oh, oh. What? Do you really not remember? That was like four emotions.

That is fine. You asked him to go find a Reese's peanut butter cup for you. Oh, my God. Oh, okay. The Reese's peanut butter cup triggered the memories. There it is. That laughs as we have a good story coming. Yeah.

Well, I don't know. Do you remember him? Because it sounds like you may not remember the night very well. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it was a crazy night, you know, it's Halloween. We were all drinking. Yeah.

I briefly remember asking a guy for races. Yeah. Okay. Well, that guy has a name, and it's Andrew. Yeah. He said he got your number from, like, a friend of yours or something. Yeah. Oh.

That's how we got your number. Okay. Yeah. And so Andrew told us all about the night, at least the parts that he remembers, because, like you said, you guys were all drinking. and he's just wondering if something went wrong or if not if you guys can see each other again did he tell you anything else yeah he told us that you made out oh yeah yeah but um so we were making out and you know we wanted to kind of be in a private area so we went to his car wait okay not like an upstairs bedroom.

Okay, both people with large things around them getting into a car. How did that work? It didn't work. I love how like drunk guy couldn't figure out how to get his costume just off. Can't you just take that part off to get into the car? That's exactly it. Like that's the thing. We were so drunk we couldn't figure part off to get into the car? That's exactly it. Like, that's the thing. We were so drunk, we couldn't figure out how to get his thing off.

So awkward. So I'm just picturing the two of you now in the back of the car, just like in mangled outfits, unable to even touch. It got really awkward. And I had to climb up inside his costume like... No, you didn't. Like, through his hula hoop. I love it. I guess that's one way to do it.

I was going to say that as a joke earlier. That's amazing you actually did that. You guys are determined to make this happen, clearly. Well, you were trying to take it off, right? You weren't climbing up there to be sexy. Well, I wanted to get what I wanted to get. Yeah, exactly. Okay. I hope no one walked by be sexy. Well, I wanted to get what I wanted to get. Yeah. Exactly.

Okay. I hope no one walked by the car. Oh, my God. So you're in the back of his car. You climb up inside of his costume. Now he looks pregnant. What's going on next? Through his hula hoop.

And then he's not ready. And I'm like, what? Oh, he was too drunk. Maybe. to get things ready yeah okay so then then you i mean that's quite the crawl of shame then you walk back that will forever be the crawl of shame and you tell him what, what do you even say? Probably out of a sad tunnel. Oh, Lexi. That's a crazy story. But I don't think Andrew even knows that happened. Oh, yeah.

How would he not know? Oh, because he didn't remember. He didn't tell us that. Or he didn't tell us that because it's embarrassing. Isn't that embarrassing for you, dude? Also true. Let's ask if he remembers. Andrew, do you remember any of this happening?

So, well, first off, hi, lex nice to hear from you again yeah lexi i need to let you know that andrew's been listening this entire time he wants to talk to you oh my god you're good lexi i uh i didn't really remember that bit i mean once you started telling it it started coming back but uh i don't think one broken book should you know negate what could be a very happy i don't know they shouldn't say broken no it wasn't broken it wasn't even there yeah that's the problem yeah well at least the blame somewhere else man like on the alcohol or something yeah mistakes were made that's all i can. I'm more than just a pretty face in a shuttlecock costume. I can't. It seems really likable.

I don't know. I do other stuff. You know, I snowboard. I've seen all of the Sopranos. Hey, good series. Are you reading her your dating bio right now? Is that what you're doing? He's shooting a shot.

I'm shooting my shot, you know? Yeah, bro. She doesn't even know me. She just knows me as some dude in a Batman costume. I want her to know me. Okay.

She didn't even know his name, guys. What's that? She didn't remember. There's definitely only up to go from that experience that you had with him. That is true.

Exactly. I mean, Lexi, what do you think? Like, he likes the Sopranos. Do you like the Sopranos? Are you into snowboarding? he likes the Sopranos. Do you like the Sopranos? Are you into snowboarding? I like the Sopranos, but I don't like snowboarding. So it's half and half.

There's probably more options, right? Keep saying stuff. Keep saying stuff. What else you got, Andrew? Yeah, give it to her. Come on. Would it help if I did a Tony Soprano impression? Would that help?

Yeah, I love it. No, I think we're going the wrong direction. Yes, make him do an impression. This is awesome. Tony Soprano's on Brooke's hall pass list. Come on. No, he's not. I kind of want to hear the Soprano impression. Oh, yeah.

Lay it on us, Andrew. Oh, no. The old days, they're gone. Wait, that was it? The old days, they're gone? Andrew, what I really think you need to do is ask Lexi out in an Italian voice. Oh. How would Tony Soprano ask a lady out?

I'll take you down to a Chaltrieri's. You can get any sort of soda you want, any sort of sandwich. And, you know, maybe you can go down to the construction site and do a little extra building. I don't know. Hey! Wow. Do you want to check out his meatballs, Lexi? Oh, my goodness.

I mean, he's a man of many talents, Lexi. He is. He sounds fun, doesn't he? I mean, at this point, we would love to offer to send you guys out on another date, and we will pay for it. Oh, boy. This is a mess. Only under one condition

that he bring reese's peanut butter cups all right tony soprano tony soprano you got some reese's hookups oh i got some reese's hookups i got i know a reese's guy oh no well congratulations you. You got a second date. Yay, cute. Thank you. See, Brooke? Oh, my God. You overcame everything. I'm just going to say that, okay, Andrew?

Lord. I'm an underdog, you know? I'm a fighter. I got to do what I got to do. Okay. Got to do what you got to do to get a second date, eh? You're not a dad. I know.

Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed?

Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.